#fuck i hated this movie

[hartwinorlose]

this is going to be an extremely negative review about furiosa

if you liked it, i am so happy that you got something from it, but i nearly cried tears of anger and frustration. i know that's a bit of an overreaction but mad max: fury road got me back into writing fanfiction, it got me into action movies, and it made me more interested in cinema as a medium

all that to say

i not only disliked this movie, i actively hated it, and i think it brings the franchise down. i'm going to indiscriminately get into spoilers but, like... please save yourself the money and don't watch this movie

first off, i was not jazzed for anya taylor joy when i first found out about the casting and yeah. she didn't sell me on furiosa. she doesn't look like her, sound like her, or bring anything to the role at all. this was severe miscasting, and i hate to think it was just because she's hollywood's hot commodity at the moment, but i can't think of another reason. (on a separate note, chris hemsworth was the one bright spot in this movie imo - he was actually really good)

the editing and cinematography had some good moments but was overall off-putting. instead of being spellbound by the whole movie like i was with fury road, i marked a few shots that were stellar

i HATED the plot. i cannot FATHOM why you would center this movie around some random guy who actually makes immortan joe look like a hero??? after watching this, i actually cannot understand why furiosa stole the wives from him. he respected her opinions, saved her from the guy she centered her whole life around hating, and just in general did not do anything to convince me that furiosa would hate him. i fucking hate this. why would you do this, george miller

i don't like jack. i don't know him. i don't buy that furiosa would tell him where the green place is because SHE DOESN'T KNOW HIM EITHER. WHY ARE ALL THESE RANDOM GUYS INFATUATED WITH FURIOSA. STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT

like seriously, rictus, immortan joe, jack, fucking chris hemsworth's character whose name i am too upset to remember - they all just take one look at furiosa and go ride-or-die for her and i DON'T UNDERSTAND

we don't see her with the wives. we don't see furiosa with the wives. i don't understand why she was so loyal to them. i wanted to see her build a relationship with them, goddammit, that is the part of furiosa's backstory i CARED ABOUT

the fact that she used the fucking peach pit on this NOBODY of a man and didn't save it to rebuild the green place. she planted it in the citadel, a place she ostensibly hated and didn't realize she would be returning to. she used the peach pit her mother gave her in the home of who we're supposed to be her biggest enemy to get revenge on a dude who doesn't fucking matter in the scheme of her life. look how they massacred my girl. furiosa, sweetie, i'm so, so sorry everything in this movie centered around a goddamn MAN

i mean, they basically fridged her mother. this is every "dead wife as motivation for revenge story," it's just a mom this time. what the fuck, that's so fucking shallow. you really couldn't come up with anything better. no one pitched ANYTHING better??? bullshit

[castielsprostate]

i hate you "influencers", i hate you tiktok, i hate you "content creators", i hate you "unalive" and "s€x" and "dr/ügs", i hate you instagram, i hate you consumerism, i hate you family friendly, i hate you puritans, i hate you facebook, i hate you family vloggers, i hate you violating other people's privacy, i hate you modern day social media

[phantomrose96]

The realest part of the Barbie Movie was when Barbie was like "okay but what if this hurts his feelings? what if this makes him sad? :(" after Ken stole her house, stole her car, and stole her agency, because as a woman you still have to second guess everything you do on the assessment of whether it might hurt a man's feelings.

And then that apprehension was proven right one million times over by the entire Conservative Internet Manosphere pissing and shitting and screaming themselves hoarse over Barbie daring to hurt a man's feelings.

[leresq]

Five Nights at Freddy's (2023, dir. Emma Tammi)

Scream (1996, dir. Wes Craven)

Matthew Lillard

[beebopurr]

I can't believe I've been drawing turtles for a year

[sugarcoatednightshade]

thinking about how Humans Are Space Orcs stories always talk about how indestructible humans are, our endurance, our ability to withstand common poisons, etc. and thats all well and good, its really fun to read, but it gets repetitive after a while because we aren't all like that.

And that got me thinking about why this trope is so common in the first place, and the conclusion I came to is actually kind of obvious if you think about it. Not everyone is allowed to go into space. This is true now, with the number of physical restrictions placed on astronauts (including height limits), but I imagine it's just as strict in some imaginary future where humans are first coming into contact with alien species. Because in that case there will definitely be military personnel alongside any possible diplomatic parties.

And I imagine that all interactions aliens have ever had up until this point have been with trained personnel. Even basic military troops conform to this standard, to some degree. So aliens meet us and they're shocked and horrified to discover that we have no obvious weaknesses, we're all either crazy smart or crazy strong (still always a little crazy, academia and war will do that to you), and not only that but we like, literally all the same height so there's no way to tell any of us apart.

And Humans Are Death Worlders stories spread throughout the galaxy. Years or decades or centuries of interspecies suspicion and hostilities preventing any alien from setting foot/claw/limb/appendage/etc. on Earth until slowly more beings are allowed to come through. And not just diplomats who keep to government buildings, but tourists. Exchange students. Temporary visitors granted permission to go wherever they please, so they go out in search of 'real terran culture' and what do they find?

Humans with innate heart defects that prevent them from drinking caffeine. Humans with chronic pain and chronic fatigue who lack the boundless endurance humans are supposedly famous for. Humans too tall or too short or too fat to be allowed into space. Humans who are so scared of the world they need to take pills just to function. Humans with IBS who can't stand spicy foods, capsaicin really is poison to them. Lactose intolerance and celiac disease, my god all the autoimmune disorders out there, humans who struggle to function because their own bodies fight them. Humans who bruise easily and take too long to heal. Humans who sustained one too many concussions and now struggle to talk and read and write. Humans who've had strokes. Humans who were born unable to talk or hear or speak, and humans who through some accident lost that ability later.

Aliens visit Earth, and do you know what they find? Humanity, in all its wholeness.

[harasharaved]

The fact that Judaism is trending because of both the wave of bomb threats on synagogues and Bradley Cooper's Antisemitism Adventure (his huge fake prosthetic nose, and him basically stealing the story from a Jewish man) is so infuriating and so exhaustingly typical.

The fact that I see Judaism trending on Tumblr and immediately think "oh no. Something Bad is happening to us." We're never trending cause it's fucking good. I never get to be excited, it's just cold dread.

The fact that Antisemitism is getting worse everyday and the only ones who ever talk about it are other Jews. The fact that no one else fucking cares. The only ones who support us are other Jews. Even when gentiles talk about Nazis or white supremacists they don't want to help us. We're just their prop, the canary in the coal mine and the perfect victim.

The fact that everyone's uncomfortable with Jews still being here. Reminding them of things they'd rather forget.

The fact that it'd be easier for them if we were all dead. Then they could tell stories about our people, dressed in offensive caricatures, without us making a fuss.

[paroxsysdraw]

the Minecraft movie could've been good if they went off the end poem and the mod. / shader community. they could've made the movie look beautiful and could've used regular Minecraft with fucking raytracing. but we are all slaves to capitalism so we get white steve played by jack black and (the new) Jumanji ass movie plot.

what if we collectively shit on the producers porch

[repmet]

@rwrbsource & @rwrbmovie’s rwrb appreciation month bingo: underrated moment

Alex getting recognised in public

[valleydean]

i can't believe how some men on the internet are wildly missing the point of the Barbie movie. a group of men whose literal job it was to decide what a woman gets to be tried to put her in an actual box. for the love of god, what's not clicking?

[catmask]

born to suffer as a guy who loves writing and reading books but also loves movies and how theyre made. my two mistresses who hate eachother deeply and sometimes make out

[thebroken--soul]

It’s 2024 and Margot Robbie wasn’t nominated for the Oscar of Best Actress for Barbie and Greta Gerwing got snubbed for the Best Director but Ryan Gosling got nominated for playing Ken ?! Looks like everyone has still not understood the message behind Barbie…

[acecroft]

Laurie Holden and Radha Mitchell on set of SILENT HILL (2006)

[felsicveins]

His heart belongs to another

And no other heart will do

[goatyuuji]

This single panel alone can bring any man down to his knees…

[elssbethtascioni]

FILMS WATCHED IN 2024 Oppenheimer (2023) dir. Christopher Nolan