#from like 80 pity on 100%

[buttercupshands]

tried to draw something

but no head empty thoughts tired need a break

[traegorn]

Girl you can rant and rave all day but we all know for a fact you can't vote your way out of this mess so your "genuinely, what else can we do?" sounds like pure cucked defeatism. This downward spiral of American fascism has proven stable, so no, voting isn't going to stop it. The democrats will never be pushed left - as proven by blatant history. I know this is your cue to list a bunch of social services or civil rights concessions a la #bidenwins but the drip violence of homophobia and abortion restrictions under republicans does not come close to the bipartisan armed tyranny that murders people in broad daylight.

Voting isn't going to solve any of this, and no voting isn't going to "clear the way" or make it easier to resist. Democrats have proven over and over and over again they will use the full force of violence to stop anything that truly threatens them and the ONLY WAY to stop American fascism is to threaten them, to threaten the very foundations of the system itself.

You exert all this effort, have all this pained frustration, over the weakest political action you can take. You are not challenging fascism or tyranny or helping any of the people harmed under bipartisan violence. You ignore these people and focus on "harm reduction" for the few who do benefit from the pitiful social safety nets democrats eke out only to be undermined in the next four or eight years as republicans INEVITABLY take back power. Such is the case of a two party system, as history proves. You're staving off the inevitable by exerting all this energy into electoralism, and the people you "save" by electing democrats are inevitably hurt anyways when republicans INEVITABLY take back power - because that's what the system guarantees.

You exist in a cycle of abuse with the American government, a punishment-reward system under the 2 parties that keeps you afraid of punishment and too desperate for reward that you ignore how the hand that feeds you is also putting kids in cages and blowing up babies overseas. You, and everyone who thinks like you, will never be the ones to save anybody.

Idk I was pissed and now got all sad again after writing this. Just so you know my being sad at the state of your ideology isn't a representation of my passivity that people like you like to construe - I am painfully politically active. But it's just...sick. You're stuck in an abusive cult and now I just feel bad for you

I'm usually a lot nicer when I reply to folks, but you brought a certain energy that deserves a different response. I want to be clear to any passersby who I'd normally be polite to in this kind of conversation: This energy is reserved only for chucklefucks who bring this kind of shit to me. Please do not take this as a reflection as to how I'd treat people willing to engage honestly and civilly with me. This anon came to me unprovoked, so they're getting a rather unique response.

So here we go.

Oi, shit head. This was the stupidest thing I've read all day.

Democrats 100% have moved left in the last 40 years. Are we still recovering from when they got dragged right by Reagan in the 80s? Yes. But we've made headway getting things back on track. You claim a lot of stuff here, but don't cite a single example. Likely because you just repeat what someone else told you on TikTok that one time. You couldn't find your way through actual theory if it smacked you in the face with its dick. But you don't want me to actually justify it.

Because your own words told me you'd dismiss any evidence I provided:

I know this is your cue to list a bunch of social services or civil rights concessions a la #bidenwins but the drip violence of homophobia and abortion restrictions under republicans does not come close to the bipartisan armed tyranny that murders people in broad daylight.

Bitch, this shit is a sliding scale. Trump authorized more drone strikes than Obama did in eight years. Are they bad? Yes. But if you're telling me you want more murders, Trump's your guy. Guess what, living in America means dealing with the fact that you've been complicit in genocide this whole time. Look at the land you stand on -- it is soaked in blood. Look at the smart phone you're reading this on, it literally came out of a genocide.

You bathe in blood every day, fucking figure it out.

We do our best to minimize harm. And if you'd ACTUALLY read or watched anything I've said, your two half dead braincells would have noticed the part where I constantly say "voting is not the end of your activism." It's the fucking start.

Either Harris or Trump will be the next President. Trump will be worse. If you aren't doing everything you can to stop him, you're not a leftist, you're a grandstanding piece of shit who doesn't care about anything other than the smell of your own farts.

You want to fuck up the two parties? Great. Put in the fucking work -- because the Presidential election ain't it, shithead. Build a real movement from the ground up. Build community, build a party system, run local candidates. When's the last time your ass went to a city council meeting or a school board meeting? Do you even know when they're held where you live?

But let's face it, you couldn't coalition build if you tried because you're so far up your own ass you kiss your small intestine goodnight.

Daddy Revolution ain't coming, shithead. There's work to do, so get your head out of your ass and do it.

You want Trump to win? Netanyahu would kiss you on the lips for it. Fuck off.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

🧂 mad salty 🧂

LET ME ShOW YOU THE bULLshIT I WENT THROUGh TO GET A COMpLETE SET OF TSUMSiTTER SSRS 😭

Guess how many rolls this fella took?

... 100 🤡 I CAN'T BELIEVE HE TOOK A SOFT PITY, MALLEUS DRACONIA IS NOT WORTH THIS (The only reason I rolled is so I can have all 7 Tsumsitter SSRS...)

This one took 80... which... is more than I would like to spend, but isn't as bad as hitting a soft pity.

AND THEN VIL TOOK ME A WHOLE HARD PITY AT 200???? ?? ? ??????? ? ???? ? ? ?? UM, EXCUSE YOU ???? He’s even more offended than Malleus that I said I didn’t like him… 😭

The only good news (?) is that I finally got my first ever Dorm Uniform Kalim at 60ish pulls BUT THEN FRIGGING TSUMSITTER IDIA SPOOKS ME AND STEALS THE 100 SOFT PITY FROM VIL... The irony is that I was ALSO dealing with a bunch of technical issues on the day I rolled, which now feels like foreshadowing a bad omen in hindsight.............. .. .......... . .. . . .. . . .. .. ...... . . . . Anyway, point is that I'm now mad at Idia 💀

Your groovies had BETTER be good or Idia is getting balded 🧯 DO YOU HEAR ME, SHROUD??????? ?? ?? ?? ? ? PREPARE YOUR HAIRLINE BECAUSE I'M COMING FOR YOU

(Bonus doodle by anbansai!) "Yes, officer. It was him who caused me several mild inconveniences today. Take him away."

[mikuni14]

Century of Love - Ep 7

Wow, what an episode, WOW! I'll be honest, I was actually pretty worried about this episode for one reason and one reason only: that San would be confused, lost, and worst of all: torn between Vee and New Wat. You have no idea how relieved I am that San was 100% with Vee the whole time. Even the scene of him comforting Wat at the beginning, I took it as his natural protective and comforting instincts kicking in, rather than him "connecting" with New Wat.

San was of course confused and worried about this whole mess, which is absolutely understandable, but not enough to overshadow his feelings - he was sure of them. That's the best thing ever 💯

Why I love this episode:

I cried for about 80% of the time

Neither San nor Vee did anything stupid, weird, unpleasant that would affect how much I like them (and I was really afraid of it ngl)

San didn't give in to pressure from Vee, family, Wat, the stone or FATE. I really liked the scene at the beginning when Vee runs away, begs him to let him go, pulls away, and San holds him tight, doesn't let go, doesn't give up. Likewise, after Vee's confession, he still goes to him, he's still open to Vee and if it weren't for his weakness and fainting, he would definitely go after him again

I really liked how he treats Juu, how he apologized to her for causing her problems and stress

I like that San quickly gets his shit together, makes decisions quickly without wallowing in self-pity, constant pondering, questioning and indecisiveness

I like the portrayal of Vee's absolute despair and frenzy related to his grandmother's condition. That's actually rare. Also, how he makes bad decisions under the influence of that despair. I like that he repeats the actions of the equally desperate, scared and mourning San from 100 years ago

I like the classic juxtaposition from fairy tales: true love is sincere, noble, ready to make sacrifices "I'd rather leave/die, as long as my beloved lives", juxtaposed with fake love that slanders, undermines trust, ingratiates itself, fights dirty. It's also interesting that San paid so much attention to Wat's nobility and kindness and how he judged Vee when he met him, and yet his heart chooses a noble person again - Vee, even if his eyes see someone with Wat's face. Classic 🤩

of course I love that San does what I've been saying from the beginning: he chooses Vee as Vee and even said it himself! San chose Vee even when put in front of someone who looks like Wat and has her memories. San makes a free choice, he falls in love with a specific person. Once it was Wat, now it's Vee.

I also love the protectiveness shown in this episode: San is protective of Vee and his family, Vee is protective of San and his grandmother, San's family is protective of him and Vee (that's why his "betrayal" hurt them so much), Ton and Trai are protective of Vee…

The whole truth about San's feelings was shown in his reaction when the stone lit up for Vee, and when it lit up for New/Fake Wat. And how he reacts physically to Vee and Wat, sometimes even in the same scene (like pushing her away and being gentle with Vee). You can't fake that. Also, after seeing Wat after 100 years of waiting, the first thing San did was go to Vee and hug him 🥺 He kept asking him to stay, he held him in his sleep, as if he was afraid he would leave..

I just... I love them so much. For all the emotions they give me, for how wonderful and human they are. For how much they love each other and how much they are willing to do for each other.

"I don't want San to die as well. Even though I won't be with him. But I will see him live his life. Be happy with the person he loves. This is enough?" "So a person like me would love him? A bad person like me?" 💔 "I LOVE VEE FOR VEE"

[vanilla-rainbows]

Wreck-it Ralph AU - GUARDIAN

Ok, let me preface this by saying three (3) things:

English is not my first language. I’m currently incapable of writing fanfiction in a language that is not my own, so please forgive me. Feel free to correct me if you see any mistakes!

I welcome all kinds of feedback. Just don’t be rude, please TTwTT

This might get long and messy. I haven’t really planned out anything with this AU and all of this is 100% vibes, but I’m open to suggestions and might expand/change/delete things as I go.

The (quite long) premise of this AU is basically this: Turbo survived the events of the first movie (original I know) because he rewrote so much of himself into Sugar Rush that the game now thinks he’s actually part of it. So he respawns, but gets kicked out of the game and is forced to go back to his previous life as a gameless character in Game Central Station. Only difference, everyone this time KNOWS he’s alive and what he did (because Ralph and/or Vanellope explained the whole situation to the rest of the arcade). So everyone basically treats him like shit (more or less like Vanellope). He’s both shunned and mocked by the other characters, and is forcefully kept away from every game in the arcade, to prevent him from “going Turbo” again.

But the thing is, he’s actually powerless now, and can’t actually do anything dangerous anymore. He lost the cy-bug part of his code (sorry kcb fans but the tall menacing cockroach doesn’t exactly give out the pathetic wet cat vibes that this au demands) because of the reset, and even glitches between his Turbo and King Candy model at times. He’s hit rock bottom and he knows it. And obviously he blames it all on Vanellope and Ralph, and wants to take revenge on them. So, knowing how powerful his cy-bug form was, he decides to wait for a chance to sneak into Hero’s Duty and get himself eaten again by one of the creatures. THEN he will be free to wreak havoc on the arcade and happily destroy every single game in it (starting with Sugar Rush of course). And ABSOLUTELY no one will be able to stop him.

So naturally he gets stopped again. This is where I’d introduce the OC I’m planning for this AU. Her name is Luna and she is the titular protagonist of Luna’s Adventure (might change later), a fantasy adventure that resembles the first Zelda game in terms of graphics and mechanics (also might change later). Luna is essentially an optimistic, but not an hopeless one. Being one of the oldest characters in the arcade (she’s from the 80’ as well), she knew who Turbo was back in the day and is fully aware of the situation, but doesn’t really like the “let’s all laugh at him” mentality. So she mostly ignores/pities him, and makes sure he doesn’t try anything funny with her game. That is, until she spots him as he’s sneaking into Hero’s Duty during opening hours. She immediately takes action and follows him into the game. At first she tries to talk him out of it, but her pleads fall of deaf ears, as Turbo is too fixated on his revenge plan to even listen to her. He feels like he has no other options. He lost everything, again. In the eyes of the other characters, he’s but a pest. Better be feared than respected at this point. This desperate attempt (which seems more like self-destructing behaviour) is his last chance.

The heated back and forth between the two grabs the attention of a solitary cy-bug, which immediately attacks them. Luna quickly avoids the creature and safely gets to a hidden spot, but when she notices that Turbo has no intention of running away, on the contrary, he’s purposefully exposing himself like the snack he is, she jumps on him and saves him from the incoming cy-bug attack. So for a few minutes we have the comical situation of Luna continuously saving Turbo and herself from the cy-bug, and Turbo trying so hard to get eaten but getting saved everytime. Eventually the cy-bug is shot to death by Calhoun herself, who IS SO READY to blast Turbo out of existence with all of her arsenal, but desists when Luna explains the whole situation to her. Still, the sergeant has no intention of keeping the glitchy gremling in her game a second longer, and escorts both of them out. Turbo lashes out at Luna for ruining his ultimate plan, but before she can say anything back, the arcade opens. Luna leaves in a hurry, telling Turbo to behave while she’s away because she’s not done with him. So he’s left in the middle of GCS wandering what the hack she meant by that.

That night, all main characters from each game reunite to discuss what to do with Turbo. Felix, Ralph, Vanellope, Calhoun and Luna are all present. Turns out they have no idea how to handle the situation. They can’t let him run freely around the arcade. What would happen if he tried to infiltrate another game? Unsurprisingly, no one mentions Surge Protector. Someone suggests they could simply kill him. He deserves it, after all. Ralph is neutral, Vanellope is slightly against the idea, but Felix jumps up and firmly says that they are not going to kill anyone. If they did, they wouldn’t be better than him. Then Calhoun makes a proposal. Just like keeping the cy-bugs inside Hero’s Duty is also part of her, well, duty, someone should take on the role of a warden to Turbo, keeping him inside their game and out of everyone else’s. Obviously she can’t do it, neither Vanellope, so another character will have to.

The problem is that no one wants to have anything to do with Turbo. They may mock him during the day, but they really are all just terrified by him. The fear of getting unplugged is so strong that no one is willing to take the risk. No one, but Luna. While everyone argues, she slowly stands up and offers herself to be Turbo’s guardian. The room goes silent for a few seconds, but eventually everyone applauds her courage.

Now comes the hard part. Luna has to find a delicate way to break the news to her colleagues. They obviously have A LOT to say about it, but she is able to convince them. Sort of. Things might not be so simple after all. Even though she agreed to keep an eye on Turbo, she’s not sure how exactly this decision will affect her and her game. Was it really the right thing to do? What if he became really dangerous? She’s actually starting to reconsider, when an idea forms in her coded mind. What if… she were to teach him goodness? What if she offered him a chance, instead of treating him like a criminal? All I have to say is that Turbo will definitely take advantage of the situation and play along, all so that he can finally have his sweet revenge.

That’s all for now. I have a few ideas on how the story could continue, and a few interactions that I absolutely want to incorporate as well. Also I already have a finale in mind, and I hope to eventually get to that (the final scene is the one most clear in my mind right now). So, if you actually managed to read all that, thank you! Now I can go back to being a normal human being again (delusional).

[probablydinosaurs]

five joking about his life or throwing it in their faces makes the siblings uneasy. they cant FATHOM it and it hurts. tbh i feel once they aren't all in such danger and ignoring his warnings and ring leader like behavior , they would slowly start spoiling him a bit. he wouldn't notice at all at first but over time, he gets a deep sense that everyone pities him but he cant place it. he'd start denying any hand outs or good will bc he doesn't want to be seen as a headcase that needs coddling. and i think different siblings are in different camps if u put "baby" and "old man" on a sliding scale. none of these are like extreme stances, more just the vibes they feel from five.

Luther: old man 80% bc hes the only one that see's five's "older" self and can 100% say. same guy no changes. mentally unsound…. but like five stated in that whole fiasco, Luther has daddy issues and cant like. see that old man in such a young man. Luther has 1 half a brain cell. his need to nod and agree to every old man he listens to illnesses wont allow it. so he weirdly flip flops. he also develops the habit of trying to pick five up to calm him down, witch ends very poorly each time.

Diego: protective brother energy. cant fathom his brother got THAT much trauma in him. and is older then him. 13 years of being all the same age. 13 years of sharing the same birthday. and now well everyone ages up together, five is in his own corner being like 67 well the rest are like mm idk math 40 something. Diego just cant…think that far. denial. every time he thinks he's used to this old man or starts seeing him as the same age as everyone, five info dumps about the inner workings of a specific gun or the how good the wine in the celler will be 37 years exactly from now and to wait…Diego just mentally reboots.

Allison: baby camp. didn't take him very seriously back in the day either bc his ego is the size of a watermelon. and oh look the lil guy thinks bc he has more life behind him then us, he thinks he's the smartest one here. yeah right. she makes him his coffee when he wakes up or folds his Landry bc she needs to do hers and he forgot to take his out. five just thinks shes being passive aggressive but its more "if i don't then he might hurt himself or mumbling to himself about how forgetful he has become and i do NOT want to here that right how. il just do it. " tough love babying. five sometimes lets her brush his hair when he's in a bad state of mind.

klaus: depends on the day. he is the one who tease him about his height the most. i think Klaus tries to pinch his cheeks at least once a day and nearly got a blade through his hand at attempt # 23. but he also is second one that weirdly respects him the most. complementing how happy he looks DUE to his retirement and not just in general. likes buying him the stuffiest old man clothes ever from off the road and down an alley thrift shops, thinking everyone would find them silly but five like. genuinely adores them and borderlines on feeling the want to hug him but neh. too stubborn. almost though. witch is rare. five will never admit that he thinks Klaus has a good fashion sense.

ben: the brother that ruffles his hair the most. the two that severed the family. they have a unspoken energy about them. you don't mention my death, i wont bring up your past deal. Ben doesn't really care anyway. on the "i got my brother back, that's all that matters." camp with viktor. fuels five's need to bicker on topics. their hard ass but still playful energy balances each other out. is the one that tells klaus that the clothes he picks out for five is too much and he will hate them but gets surprised every time five likes them. riiight right. he wouldn't have the tastes as the 13 year old i remember him as. he downs scotch like a mad lad. gotta remember that.

viktor: leader of the "he could have come back to us as an acorn like dad warned and id still keep him in my pocket." camp. just happy to have his favorite sibling back. though they admit five also being the most open with him makes him uneasy. he wants to listen about the past 45 years but it can be very existential for viktor. five understands and lets him breath if its too much. (stealing this from this post) i feel like five owns and somehow still has on him a very worn and well loved copy of viktor's book. with notes and highlights scribbled in them. the cover fell off and five sewn it back on then poorly laminated it with the commission's laminating machine . viktor would cry if he saw it. full blown meltdown together.

[lookatmysillies]

Character Intimacy Levels: S39 Pt. 1

Based on the character intimacy percentages from the art book. Covering my characters’ intimacy levels with characters they have notable relationships with within and outside of their classes. This is part 1 for my S39 kids, then there’ll be Non-Competitors (Eddy and Itsaso), S40 (Naz and Yael), and S41 (Light and Halo).

Send me an ask if I miss your character and you want to know the intimacy level between one of my ocs and yours!

Tallis

Himei: 100% You picked me, of all people. I don’t know why you picked me. Sometimes I worry you just took pity on me.

Tov: 100% Is this what it’s like to be truly understood? I never knew it could be like this. It’s unlike anything I’ve ever felt.

Eddy: 85% We met under the worst circumstances. Maybe that’s why I’ve grown to love you so fast.

Lang: 80% I just like to… sit with you. And watch you make things from nothing. You calm me.

Khoi: 78% We used to be closer, but after Sai and Vera… well, we’re just not as close anymore. Still, I think I love you very much. You taught me more than anyone ever has.

Nyx: 76% You can be cold and sharp, but I know you’re full of good. You’re my friend. I feel safe with you.

Stasya: 65% My roommate. You keep your things tidy like me. I like you a lot.

Sai: 64% After everything, I still wish the best for you.

Castor: 60% Your inability to take things seriously gets on my nerves. But you look out for me.

Noora: 45% What a sweet girl. You’re the first human I ever saw.

Flor: 25% I don’t get you…

Daiki: 25% Maybe we could be friends in another life.

Cirrus: 12% If only I knew you better. I feel like I can see the answer to life itself on your face, and then a million new questions.

Azure: 5% I think Tov likes you? You make me nervous.

Castor

Kyo: 100% Kyo, lovely soul, I’ve never deserved you, your gentleness, or your grace for someone who only hurts the people he loves.

Nyx: 96% Baby brother, I’d like to think I’d do anything for you. I hope I’m right.

Haneul: 88% You make me feel safer than I’ve ever felt. I used to find you difficult to understand. I understand you now.

Aurien: 75% You make me feel such love and protectiveness. And yet your trust in me scares me.

Faolan: 73% Hehe, you remind me of my Kyo!

Jae: 66% You make me laugh every day.

Flor: 50% You remind me a bit of—well, me.

Evon: 45% I hated when Kyo had a crush on you, but I could never hate you. You’re beautiful. You gave him solace in ways I couldn’t.

Dian: 31% My little redheaded buddy! You’re good for Nyxie, following him around all the time. He needs to not be in his thoughts so much.

Moran: 12% Therapy party pooper.

Tov: 10% Uptight and unnerving. You have qualities I respect, though.

Azure: 1% Ugh.

Solei: 1% Sometimes I can’t help but loathe you for flying. For saving Aurien. Because I couldn’t.

Cinna, Leto, & Light: 1% I’m sorry.

Ok boy oh boy let’s see who to tag

@ivanttakethis for Tov. @pwippy for Lang. @bittersweet-adagio for Sai and Khoi. @imperfectnothing for Nyx, Dian, Han, and Fao. @billwasnot for Stasya. @kamersona for Noora. @sotogalmo for Flor. @daiki1k for Daiki. @cirrusoftheclouds for Cirrus. @azureitri for Azure. @aurienneirua for Aurien and Cinnabar. @kofeedoggo for Jae and Evon. @geospiral for Moran. @solei-eclipse for Solei. Aaaand @14-alc for Leto. Jfc okay time to retag like 80% of these in comments now that I have all the users in one place

[mysticstarlightduck]

New WIP Tag Game! OC Fun Facts!

Hey! So I'm bored and want to do something fun, so here it goes a new OC tag game!

(I originally posted this in the wrong place lol, because I was hella tired yesterday, but here it goes - a repost on my actual blog lmao)

Also, pls reblog to get the game going! 💕

Rules: Make a list of fun facts about your OCs. Like a headcanon list, if you will! Except it's actually canon lol.

I'll go with some of the cast from Scrapyard Boys!

Valen Cassidy

... has never dated anyone before and despite his usual brash, occasionally hawkish, and extroverted personality, actually feels really awkward/too shy to ask anyone out

... likes pop rock, pop punk, and heavy metal. his music taste varies between happy-go-lucky, upbeat, feel-good songs and the most aggressive "I hate the world"-type heavy metal

... hyper fixates on arcade games and hates losing. like, he'll throw a full-on pity party or start an argument if he loses In front of other people

... can only sleep properly if he has his dinosaur plushie with him but will never let anyone find out

...can mess someone up in a fight, especially if he hates that person or if that person threatened his friends. like he is freakishly strong and has a very short temper - his punches are devastating and his superpower isn't even super-strength

... is a night owl and hates waking up too early. is the most grumpy, angry kid in the face of the earth up until 10AM even if he drinks a truckload of coffee

... has some anger issues and feels super bad when he accidentally snaps at/says something rude to someone without a reason - he doesn't mean to be rude, and if he happens to be stressed and loses his temper, he is very harsh on himself afterward

... can actually bake pretty well and loves making cupcakes

... hates horror movies with a burning passion but will watch them if dared just to uphold his "tough guy" reputation, and then promptly won't sleep for two nights straight afterwards

... since his power is Electrical Conduction, he can actually charge things, like cellphones and laptops, etc, if he does so very carefully

Quince Warren

... likes 80s pop music and early 2000s alternative rock songs, especially grunge

... prefers to solve things diplomatically or by talking it out, because his powers are usually lethal to others and he's scared of using his powers to this day

... likes waking up early, usually before anybody else, and sleeps so soundly he could literally sleep through the apocalypse if it happened

... could not dance properly if his life depended on it

... drinks more coffee than is probably healthy, but likely doesn't realize it isn't ideal

... cries while watching romantic comedies and gets way too invested when watching soap operas

... has unnatural pain tolerance - can probably break an arm and legit not realize anything is wrong until someone points it out

... will eat pizza for breakfast if unsupervised

... is unhingedly good at hide-and-seek to the point that his friends will give up looking for him and he'll simply emerge, seemingly from out of nowhere, and they'll have no idea where he came from

... is very respectful to others and despises people who don't respect other's boundaries

Jordan Raith

... suffers from chronic insomnia and gets pissed off when he can't sleep even though he knows to expect it, takes sleeping medicine but his superhuman metabolism refuses to let it work

... likes all things macabre, gothic, and dark, ranging from 1800s gothic romance novels to early 2000s teen horror movies, will 100% enjoy the heck out of a Halloween party

... occasionally sleepwalks and talks in his sleep almost every night

... adores fast food, especially from diners, and his favorite food to order is strawberry milkshakes with a plate of tuna sandwiches and chocolate chip cookies

... loves listening to music and is almost always wearing his headphones, has a playlist for every occasion, and his favorite music genres range from moody, dark aesthetic songs to cheesy pop songs

... has a 'bad boy style' and genuinely digs it, as he is a fan of a gothic aesthetic, and despite being a troublemaker is also a cinnamon roll

... is the most dangerous, murderous, and downright ruthless member of the main cast, even some villains are afraid of him

... has an old motorcycle

... confessed his feelings for the girl he likes (Maggie) a week after meeting her, and their first date was eating ice cream on a graveyard. they've been soulmates ever since

... hates loud noises and people who are obnoxiously loud in proximity to him

... is unpredictable and genuinely terrifying to his enemies

... is bad at handling tech and social media - gets confused easily and might post a bunch of nonsense on accident + has no patience to handle it

Emily Warren

... loves puppies and cats with her whole heart, and has a chonky cat named Sir Theodore Smothie The Third, who has the personality of a chaotic little bastard of a gremlin

... has a crush on Valen because she finds his personality endearing and he is generally a great friend but is waiting to figure out if he feels the same about her

... loves survival videogames and is very competitive when it comes to beating a high score

... despite singing rather well, likes to playfully sing as awfully as she can to annoy her brother (Quince)

... can play the guitar decently and likes learning new tunes

... rarely gets into fights but has a couple of brass knuckles and a switchblade in her pockets just in case

... dyes a single strand of her hair a different color each month, or every time she can remember to

... wears glasses and has very poor eyesight without them

... her power is Combustion and she has pretty bad control over it so she can either cause block-levelling explosions or less than nothing, and it's very much a problem

... loves musicals and boy bands - and has a poster of her favorite boy band in her room

... adds stickers to anything and everything, especially if they're glittery stickers

Tagging (gently): @sleepy-night-child, @kaylinalexanderbooks, @smol-feralgremlin, @oh-no-another-idea, @littleladymab,

@winterandwords, @eccaiia, @sarahlizziewrites, @illarian-rambling

@agirlandherquill, @anoelleart, @ray-writes-n-shit

@the-golden-comet, @writernopal, @anyablackwood, @unstablewifiaccess, @forthesanityofstorytellers

@i-can-even-burn-salad, @cakeinthevoid

@lassiesandiego, @thepeculiarbird, @clairelsonao3, @memento-morri-writes, @starlit-hopes-and-dreams

@wyked-ao3 and OPEN TAG

[pondslime]

what have I done (to deserve this)

bo sinclair x afab!reader

rating: explicit

word count: 4k

Bo POV. It’s the day before Valentine’s. Bo goes shopping at a bargain outlet. In true romcom fashion, you’re there too. 

Chance encounter meet-cute. Except it’s with the worst man this side of Baton Rouge. Sucks! But you get to make out with him! Hope that’s worth the incoming pain and misery, bestie!

Crossposted on AO3 here. 

Very self-indulgent and GOOFY. A heaping dose of humor and general dumbassery. Big warning for Bo being Bo. We’re in his head and he is, as always, so stupid. Reader does not have a car for porn reasons. That’s it. She’s a public transportation whore for roadhead purposes. She’s also kind of annoying. And a bratty bimbo. 

The title of this fic comes from the song “What Have I Done to Deserve This” by Pet Shop Boys. It’s just a jazzy lil 80′s track that I could 100% picture playing in a bargain outlet over shitty speakers. Bo’s on his Gen X shit.

I just wanted to write about Bo encountering a chick who immediately wanted to hoover him down. Ambiguous ending with some unsettling implications.

This fic is a birthday gift for @raccoonspooky​! 🦝💝👻 MWAH!!! I LUV U!!! HAPPY BDAY!!!! HAPPY BIRF!!! DAY!!!! HERE’S STUPID!!!! 4 U!!!

The bargain outlet stretches out in front of him, large yellow signs hanging from the warehouse ceiling. Sales down every aisle, 25% off on all kitchenware. Music blares out of loudspeakers, spitting out a song that Bo hasn’t heard since high school.

He’s thinking of his mother again.

Packed into the family car, bumping down the road to the department store. Just the two of them. Mama would tell him that it was because he couldn’t be left alone, that he wasn’t trusted like Vincent was—up at the big old house, drawing his pictures and staying out of the way.

Time seemed to drag on days like that, plodding along ungainly as Trudy slowly perused shelves. It always felt like he would be stuck there indefinitely, rotting away in front of the floral baking sets and printed potholders. When people congregated around the racks, Bo would reach up and grab her hand. Surrounded with onlookers, she’d let him hold onto it.

Sometimes they’d pass by the toy aisles, but she never gave them more than a passing glance. These trips weren’t for him, after all. Despite that, he looked forward to them with an odd giddiness.

Bo couldn’t be alone, but Vincent couldn’t get this.

Vincent didn’t get to watch himself reflected in the shining glass of the displays that their mother stopped at, tutting over bottles of perfume. He didn’t get to see the chrome and glossy mirrors, the array of beautiful women with long nails behind the counter tops. It wasn’t for him.

Bo would return home smug, carrying Mama’s bags. He always made sure to catch his brother’s eye.

Look. Pay attention. This is mine, it’s all mine. It isn’t yours.

He got in trouble one day. He couldn’t remember for what. Whatever it was, she got angry, and the trips stopped.

That department store had long since been razed. There weren’t a lot of things that stayed the same. Tradition was lost and paved over, turned into this.

Picking up a basket, he makes his way to the back of the store.

The hardware section is pitiful. It always is.

Tools are strewn everywhere, each one emblazoned with illegible clearance stickers. They never have the shit that he needs here. He sifts through the pile of haphazardly stacked tools, pulling a wrench out. It’s a twelve-inch, decent weight. He wraps his hand around it and knocks it against his palm. It’ll do.

On his way out of the aisle, he snatches up two rolls of duct tape and a pack of braided nylon rope.

There are some things you can never have too much of.

He cuts through the clothing department.

A store display looms overhead, announcing another sale. A woman pouts out of the ad, the heaving curve of her breasts spilling out of black lace. He feels something under his foot. Bending down, he plucks a bra off the ground. There’s a boot print across the front, dirt smeared across the polka dots.

“Good afternoon, shoppers!” A voice crackles over the intercom. “Two-for-one deals comin’ in hot this holiday season—”

Trudy would hate this place, with its messily stacked piles of clothes and the incessant beeping of the registers. That’s part of the reason he’s here.

“Um. Excuse me.”

“Huh?” He blinks, jerking his head up.

“Sorry, I just…” You look at him quizzically, your lips pursed. You’re holding a bra that looks identical to the one in his hands, sans dirt. “Need to get…uh. Behind you.”

“Yeah, of course.” He shuffles to the side. “Go on.”

He flicks through the rack, shoving the ruined bra unceremoniously to the back.

“You buying a bra?”

“Yeah.” He says absently. “For my sister.”

“…You’re buying your sister a bra?”

He turns to look at you. Wrenched away from the padded curve of the bras, he finally has a chance to assess you. Cute.

“Sister-in-law.” He amends.

Your brow scrunches in confusion and you nod slowly, fidgeting with the bra in your hands.

“I’m just messin’ with you.” He smiles.

“Okay.” You huff out a perplexed laugh.

He’s rummaging through the detergent when he sees you again.

“We just keep running into each other.” You remark.

“Seems like it.” Gesturing at the duct tape and utility gloves in his basket, he flashes you a smile. “Gotta get some stuff for work.”  

“You a plumber?”

“Uh, no.” He’s unable to hide the flicker of indignation that twitches his lip up into a sneer. “Mechanic.”

Your lips curves into an open-mouthed O and he glances down at your left hand. Finding your ring finger conspicuously bare, he files that away for later. It’s not like he gives a shit, but less collateral is less collateral.

“I run a station not far from here.”

“That’s cool.” You pick up a lint roller. “Well, nice to meet you.”

Bo finds you in the Valentine’s aisle. Or you find him. He can’t really tell.

“Are you followin’ me ‘round here, girl?” He shoots you a bemused smile. “You gonna tell me your name, stalkin’ me like this?”

“Maybe. What’s yours?”

“Bo.”

“You buying that for your sister-in-law too?” You nod towards the box of conversation hearts he’s holding. “Can’t imagine your brother likes that much.”

“Now, that’s where you’re wrong. We share everythin’.”

“Oh yeah?” You grab a box of chocolates off the shelf, placing it in your cart. “Seems messy.”

“She’s a lucky girl.”

“That depends.” You quip. “What’s your brother look like?”

He angles toward you, resting his hand on the shelf.

“We’re twins.”

Your eyebrows raise.

Couple months ago, he had one downstairs that kind of looked like you. Same hair color. He has a lock of it in one of the gas station drawers. Her ID’s in there too, but he doesn’t remember her name. He couldn’t place it at first, but that’s who you remind him of. Another version of you, maybe. You’ve got the prettier mouth, though.

“Surprised this one didn’t sell.” You pluck a card off the wire rack. A goose peers off of the paper, surrounded by hot pink lettering.

VALENTINE, WON’T YOU LET ME GET A GANDER…

You flip the card open. With a sigh, you hold it up so he can read it.

…AT THEM HONKERS.

“That’s a good one.” He nods appreciatively.

The food court is tucked into the corner of the store, a collection of neon signs and scuffed tables. The whole area smells gray, strings of cheap cheese and the lemony reek of industrial cleaner.

As he appraises the menu, he notices you at the drink fountain. When you turn, your eyes go wide.

“This isn’t what it looks like.” You exclaim.

“Huh.” He sighs. “Darlin’, you keep this up and I’ll have to call the cops.”

You open your mouth once, close it.

“You hungry?” He gestures toward the menu.

“You’re not from ‘round here, are ya’?”

“I’m just passing through.”

“Hmm.” He murmurs out his acknowledgment. “You should stick ‘round for a bit. Nothin’ like Mardi Gras in Baton Rouge. Family vacation?”

“No, it’s just me.”

He hides his laugh around a forced cough. Pinching at the bridge of his nose, he clears his throat.

“Sorry. Cigarettes.” He smiles at you. “I’m thinkin’ ‘bout quittin’.”

You chew idly at your slice of pizza, your eyes drifting over his face. He arches a brow.

“You like what ya’ see?”

“I’m not sure.” Your lips twist into a smile. “I’m still trying to figure that out.”

You have a lot of damn nerve.

“You do this a lot?” He fixes you with a pointed look.

“What? Go shopping?” There’s something so hopelessly dumb about your expression. You’re blank and brainless, an assortment of curves and painted-on prettiness in front of him.

He imagines paddles whacking the careening Ping Pong ball of your thoughts across your brain. A thought misses the paddle, ricocheting off the side of the board. Game over. Fiddle with some buttons, start over. Another one comes to take its place, bopping uselessly in your skull.

He’s met enough of your type that it shouldn’t surprise him, but somehow it always does. Someone this stupid shouldn’t be allowed to wander too far. And yet, here you are, all by yourself. Just you and your flimsy hold on rational thinking, wandering around his state.

If he hadn’t have met you here, lord knows what trouble you would’ve gotten into. You’d probably have wandered out into the bayou. Blinking all pretty, getting stuck in the muck. Wrenching open a gator’s mouth and stepping into it just because you were curious how many teeth it had.

He’d pay good money to watch that.

“Don’tchu act all shy ‘bout this. You know what I’m askin’.” He tears the straw wrapper into tiny pieces, his gaze trailing down your neck and onto your breasts. “Ya’ make a habit of goin’ ‘round and propositionin’ men in stores?”

You choke out a laugh, your eyes going wide.

“I’m not propositioning you!”

“Whatchu doin’ eatin’ my pizza, then?”

“What am I…doing…” Your eyes twinkle with barely contained glee. You muffle a laugh around another bite of pizza. “…Eating…your pizza?”

“Yeah.” He leans back in the chair. “Ya’ seem pretty happy to be sittin’ right there. Eatin’ my pizza.”

“You’re very cute.” You wipe your mouth off with a napkin, staring pointedly at his hands.

“Take a picture, it’ll last longer.” Grabbing a slice of pizza, he takes a bite.

It’s awful. Grimacing, he manages to swallow it down. Glancing down at it in disgust, he lets it fall limply back into the box. It takes him a moment before he remembers to readjust his face into one of tranquility, winking over at you.

“You know what.” You deliberate for a second, your eyes darting to his lips. “I think I am propositioning you.”

“There’s a theater next to my shop.” He smirks. “You wanna catch a movie?”

“I don’t wanna interrupt your work.”

“I got all the time in the world, honey.” He winks. “Truck’s outside.”

“You’re not gonna kill me, are you?” You rest your chin against your palm.

“Not yet.” He shakes his head. “Hardly know ya’ yet. That’d be jumpin’ the gun.”

“Alright. Fuck it.” You grin. “Let’s go.”

Standing in line at the register, he reaches into your cart and snatches out the box of chocolates.

“Hey!” You put your hands on your hips. “What are you…”

“Ya’ think I’m gonna make a girl buy her own chocolate? What I look like to you?”

You move to say something, your eyes glittering.

“If ya’ say plumber—” He gives you with a sharp look, narrowing his eyes. “I’ll tan your hide.”

“Is that a promise or a threat?” You stage-whisper, loading up the belt with items.

“Goddamnit, girl. Let’s get you outta this fuckin’ store.”

Pulling down a side road, he parks the truck.

“Hand me that, would ya’, baby?”

Rustling in the bag, he pulls out the box of chocolates. Ripping the plastic off, he tugs the lid open. He takes a bite of one. Cheap, shitty chocolate. Puts it back in its slot. Picks up another one and takes another bite. Caramel, but it’s still—

“You wanna give me my chocolate back?” You tap on his arm.

“Sorry, darlin’. I bought it. It’s mine.” He smirks at you. “Maybe if ya’ ask all pretty, I’ll give ya’ one.”

Your mouth falls open in shock and you let out a frustrated huff.

“That’s not fair!” You exclaim. “You lied.”

“Lyin’? Nah. Just omittin’ some details, sugar. It’s how we do it down here in Louisi—”

You clamor into his lap, making a grab at the chocolate. Popping one in your mouth, you bug your eyes out at him.

“Bad girl.” He tosses the box onto the dashboard. Reaching up, he grabs your chin, pulling you closer.

You taste like chocolate when he kisses you, his hand slipping down your jaw to tighten around your neck. You hum happily into his mouth, your hands on his shoulders. He can feel your breath under his fingers, the pulsing hammer of your heartbeat against his palm.

You’re always so close to death, to all that red and heat underneath, and you don’t even notice. He could press down a little more, constrict your airflow. Make it hurt. You need that, don’t you? You don’t have any fuckin’ structure. Leave you with your throat burning, your eyes swollen with tears. Make you thank him for that.

“I don’t really do this.” You murmur against his lips.

“Whatchu doin’ right now, then?”

You laugh, a breathless little noise. He reaches back and gathers your hair together at the back of your head. When he tugs your head back, you gasp.

“How bad ya’ want it?”

“I—” Discomfort flashes over your face. “Wait, um. Hold on. This is really awkward, but—”

You readjust yourself in his lap and he drops his hand, watching as you reach under your shirt. Biting down on your bottom lip, the strap of your bra slips down your shoulder. Working it through the sleeves of your shirt, you blow out a huff of relief. Stretching your arms to extricate the loops, you tug it free, tossing it onto the floor of his truck.

You turn back to him with a bashful smile.

“Movin’ fast, girl.” 

"The wire's been digging into me all day.” You shake your head, glancing over your shoulder at your discarded bra. “I needed to get a new one, but—I got kinda distracted."

"And whose fault is that?"

You look at him curiously, as if his question is strange. You lean forward and flick at the brim of his cap, smiling.

"Well, yours, technically."

“Don’t see how that tracks.” He leans back onto the headrest. 

“You distracted me.” Your voice goes high-pitched and melodic, a sing-song lilt that makes his hand tighten into a fist at his side. 

He exhales, snorting out a laugh. 

“You know what?” 

“What?” You tilt your head, raising your brows.

“I changed my mind. I’m killin’ ya’.”

You blow a raspberry at him, rolling your eyes. 

“Not yet, c’mon.” You whine, dropping kisses down the bridge of his nose. “It’s like you said. We haven’t even gotten to know each other yet!”

“You’re tryin’ my fuckin’ patience, girl.” 

“Good.”

You’re a bratty fuckin’ thing. Untrained, not an ounce of discipline in you. You rock your hips against him, wetting your bottom lip. Tart and wild, a stubbornness coasting under your skin.  He wonders how long you’ll be able to hold onto all that sass. What he’ll have to do to make sure you lose it. He can’t wait to see you cry—you’ll taste sweeter then, curled up inside yourself.

What kind of fuckin’ coincidence. 

“Look at’chu.” He shakes his head in disbelief.

“What’d you say? Take a picture, it’ll last longer?”

“Oh, don’tchu worry, baby. I will.” He grins. “Gotta get you all warmed up first, though.” 

Slipping his hand between your legs, he rubs at you through your jeans.

“You’re not fucking me in your truck.” With a giggle, you still his hand, tugging it back onto your hip.

“You gonna try to stop me?”

“Um, yeah.” A shriek of laughter spills out of your mouth and the movement rocks your body against his lap. “Anybody could see us!”

“Ya’ gonna tell me that’s what you’re worried about?” He squints at you, squashing down the glare that threatens to darken his features. Not yet. “After grindin’ on my lap like that?”

“Look, I’ve got a better idea.” Shimmying off his lap and onto the passenger seat, you grin at him. “When’s the movie?”

“The movie?” It takes a moment before the realization hits him. Scrubbing a hand over his mouth, he clears his throat. “Oh, uh—an hour.”

“And how far away is it?”

“Uh, twenty, thirty minutes.”

“Well. I don’t wanna miss it.” You tilt your head, raising a brow. “What if there’s a line?”

“There ain’t gonna be a line.” He says definitively, a wave of exhaustion settling over him. 

“You don’t know that.” You laugh. “Anyway. I think…you should drive us there. Now. So we have time.”

He’s barely started the truck back up when he feels your hands at his belt, undoing the loop.

“The fuck you doin’?”

“Trust me.” You unzip his fly, pulling him out of his boxers.

You could be sweet if you wanted. All sugar. It’s easier that way, but you won’t want it easy. You’ll make him fight you for it.

You work your hand over his cock with a sigh of contentment. Your thumb teases over the slit, rubbing precum over the head of his cock. He feels a spike of irritation at you for wasting even an ounce of his spunk on your hands. As if to apologize, you bow your head, running your tongue up the underside of his cock. You’ll have to do better than that. Licking up the sensitive skin of his frenulum, you tease your mouth around him, letting him twitch against your tongue.

“Ya’ gonna suck it or not?” He snaps, keeping his eyes locked on the road. He doesn’t need to look down to know that you’re smiling.

“Don’t be grumpy.” Your voice floats up from his lap. “I’m just taking my time. You’re just so pretty.”

Pretty? Anger rushes through him. Calling him that—thinking you can, thinking that there wouldn’t be any consequences. Who raised you? For all your pathetic staring, you haven’t even seen what’s in front of you. 

The lack of respect is sickening, making his balls feel heavy and tight. He needs to be down your throat, if only to shut you up. Give you something else to focus on. Every moment you’re near him, you’re signing yourself away. Doubling back, going over the contract in bubbly cursive.

You’re entirely unaware of how many marks you’re tallying up. Every swirl of your tongue sinks you deeper in debt. He wonders if you’d laugh if you knew just how many apologies you’re setting yourself up for.

With a hum, you take him into your mouth, swallowing your lips around his cock.

“Take it deep. Don’t you stop.”

A noise erupts from your mouth, but it’s garbled around his cock. He can’t tell, but he could have sworn that was a laugh.

He stops the truck abruptly, the movement thrusting him deeper into your mouth. You gag around him, a disgustingly wet noise at the back of your throat. With a wet pop, you pull your mouth off of his cock. The sudden loss of sensation draws a frustrated growl from his lips.

“Be careful.” Your lips are back on him. Mouthing kisses down his length, your nose bumps against his skin. “Don’t crash the car.”

“I’ve been drivin’ this truck for longer than—” You wrap your lips around the head of his cock and the sentence falters in his mouth.

He pictures you standing in the theater lobby. Confusion in your eyes, a slackness to your jaw. It’s odd and you’ll know it, right away. But you won’t do anything about it. You’ll second guess yourself. You think you’re so smart, don’t you? With that sweet little twist of your lips, batting your eyelashes at him, resting your hands on his shoulders. He wonders how long it’ll take for the confusion to lift. The realization settling over you, chilling you to the core.

You’ll look back at him and you’ll know.

A lifetime of mistakes all falling into place, your scream lost under the palm of his hand.

You should be fucked there. That’s how it should go.

He can’t wait. Not for anything, ever. Mama was always saying that. And with the wet clasp of your mouth around his cock, patience isn’t manageable. How could it be? You’ve taken up all of it, trapped it in your smile. He doesn’t have any more to give.

You bob your head up and down, resting your hands on his thigh. 

“Good girl.” He mutters. You moan and he clenches his jaw, tightening his hold in your hair. “Just like that, c’mon.”

You raise your head off his cock again and murmur out his name, and his grip on the steering wheel turns his knuckles white.

You better be enjoying saying it. Let it live in that slutty mouth of yours for a while. It’ll be off limits soon.

There’ll be other things to call him. Later. He can see several of them in his head, stacked fifty feet high in neon. He probably won’t even have to tell you which one he wants, you’ll come up with it on your own. It’ll bubble up in your little head and you’ll drool it out helplessly, stuffed full with cock. Makeup smeared down your cheeks, caked under your eyes. He’d like to see you when you’re trying to fold into yourself. When you’re trying desperately to be anything but pretty for him.

He’s ready to take the shiny veneer of this personality off. It’s slipping now, he can feel it. 

“Ain’tchu glad you met me?” He grunts out, his breaths coming out shallow.

You’re going to hate him soon enough, and he’ll be able to remind you that you didn’t before. That you can’t fool him into believing you don’t love his cock down your throat, that you don’t want his hands on you—he knows better, and you do too.

You moan your agreement against his cock. Glad, you’re fuckin’ glad. You’d better be.

He bucks up into your mouth when he cums, smacking his hand down on the steering wheel. You’re choking around him, making desperate little huffs through your nose. For your credit, you keep him in your mouth, tightening your lips around the base. He eases his foot off the accelerator, wetting his lips. 

The truck slows to a crawl as he pants, leaning into the steering wheel. He shudders when he feels your lips tug off his cock, swirling your tongue around the oversensitive head.

“We there yet?” You cough a bit, carefully tucking him back into his boxers.

“Christ, girl.” He whistles through his teeth, glancing over at you. “Actin’ like I didn’t just fuck ya’ throat.”

“You didn’t fuck me. I fucked you. And no one saw.” Wiping your mouth off with the back of your hand, you giggle.

“Little cocksucker.”

“You loved it.” You chirp smugly, winking at him. It takes everything in his resolve not to grab you by your hair and slam your forehead into the dashboard. He can’t get blood in his truck again. Shit’s unprofessional. And he’s nothing if not a stickler for appearances. There’s a way to do these things, and you’ve forced him to rewrite his script halfway through the scene. He’s almost impressed with your lack of morals.

He can only imagine how wet you must be, soaking through your jeans. With the way you were moaning around his cock, your pussy must be aching for it.

He should lay a fuckin’ towel down. Protect the goddamn seats—he can’t get your blood on the upholstery, and you know that. 

Tryin’ to leave your mark some other way, ain’tcha?

“Is this it?” You ask brightly, peering out the window.

“Yup.” He parks, turning to you. “Think you can do me a favor?”

“What?”

“Just gotta check on somethin’ with the truck. You wanna run into the shop and put this on the counter?” He grabs the chocolate box off the dashboard and stuffs it into the plastic bag. “Wouldn’t want it meltin’.”

“Sure.”

You hop out of the truck, looking at him expectantly.

“Go on, pretty thing. I’ll be right behind ya’.” 

As you push the door of his shop open, he stuffs your bra in the glove compartment. It’s cute. You won’t be needing it.

[klapollo]

something that sucks about being not skinny and having a restrictive eating disorder is that everyone makes it very plain that they dont take it seriously and that if they are aware of it they just find it annoying. i'd say way more people have gotten angry with me since i got really bad than people pitying me or seeing me as vulnerable or whatever. honestly very few people have worried about me at all, despite the fact that i spent months openly starving myself in front of my own family to the point where i lost almost 100 pounds. my family watched me eat less and less, starvation level calories for months, weighing myself dozens of times a day, crying if i didnt lose every single day, sometimes days without food or fluids almost passing out in public because i wouldnt even drink water 23 hours out of the day, and they never once felt sad or worried or scared. they just thought it was annoying. they liked the weight loss. they didnt like that i was causing problems with it.

and now i'm in and out of recovery and theyre clearly annoyed. theyre annoyed because ive stopped losing weight and have gained some. they clearly do not believe i have a disorder despite being diagnosed and sent to a doctor for tests because of it, despite sustaining physical injuries i'm still healing from because of it, despite seeing a dietitian every week because of it. they ask me if i've "given up" on losing weight, why i'm not counting calories even though i told them my dietitian said i'm not supposed to. my grandmother is in her 80s and tries to compare our weights when she calls me. they ask me why i dont weigh myself. they tell me i'm overeating because i'm not thin. they never worry about me restricting. they encourage my hatred of my own body.

most people want me to be the way i was before, just quiet about it.

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Michael in the Mainstream: Top 100 Movies #50 - #26

Finally, we're in the top 50! These next movies are ones I have a little bit more to say about than the previous entries, though the real big fish to fry will be in the final stretch.

50. Cats

Bad movies like this don’t come around very often. Nearly every aspect of this movie is hilariously misguided to the point of insanity, with the special effects in particular turning what should be a campy romp into a bizarre fever dream. But this is precisely what draws me to the film! The flashes of greatness in the back half of the movie, particularly the genuinely great Skimbleshanks scene, really come together to create one of the most endearingly batshit experiences you could ever sit through.

49. Scott Pilgrim vs. the World

A movie that ruined an entire generation of women or something, this is a just a perfectly stylish action comedy with one of the most absurdly talented casts around. It's a fun, silly little live action comic book romp that manages to make great use of Michael Cera.

48. Eraserhead

Now this is the David Lynch we all know and love! This is one of the trippiest, weirdest movies ever made, and it has one of the greatest effects ever in the baby. I fucking love that baby. It is one of the most digustingly cute creatures ever conceived.

47. Hot Fuzz

Edgar Wright’s Shaun of the Dead is the far more popular of his genre parodies, but if I’m being totally honest Hot Fuzz is by far the superior film. It’s just funnier, fresher, and more exciting. It also has actual antagonists and some really great and memorable lines, plus it loves Point Break and, of all movies, Bad Boys II.

46. Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl

Somehow, by some miracle, Disney managed to make a theme park ride featuring pirates (legendary box office poison) and make it into the most fun, exhilarating action adventure films of the 2000s. I think the bonkers premise combined with playful conviction from the entire cast is what really manages to sell this movie, but I must sadly give credit where credit is due: pre-dickhead era Johnny Depp, back when he was actually a good actor and not someone cast out of pity, brought the swaggering rock star pirate Jack Sparrow to life in glorious fashion, and manages to steal every scene he’s in. The only thing that could possibly make it better is if greatest character in the whole franchise Davy Jones was in this one, but they had to save something for the sequel.

45. It

While the miniseries starring Tim Curry as Pennywise has its charm, it is hampered by the restraints of television and its budget. With more money, we got a bigger, bloodier, gorier, and more impressive take on the iconic King novel, one that might be my favorite movie based on one of his works. The new, more horrifying and predatory take on Pennywise is certainly a big plus, but I think credit also has to be given to a young Sophia Lillis showcasing her acting chops early and Finn Wolfhard before he stopped giving a shit, as well as the rest of the kid cast. The Loser Club is the heart and soul of the story, and thankfully it’s the thing this movie nails… and it’s sadly where part two drops the ball a little bit. Grown ass adults in a secret club fighting an evil clown isn’t as cool as kids doing it, no matter how great it is to see James McAvoy and Bill Hader.

44. Kill Bill: Vol. 1

Speaking of movies where the sequel just couldn’t measure up…! This is one of Tarantino’s finest works, and certainly the one that most feels like the kind of movies that inspire him. There’s blood, ore, women going on a vengeful rampage… It really is a classic grindhouse movie with more polish. Uma Thurman truly kills it (along with scores of mooks) as Beatrix Ki—Er, I mean “The Bride.”

43. Predator

One of the manliest action films ever made, and also one of the greatest halfway plot switches of all time. You think you’re getting a simple macho 80s action film, and then halfway through, BAM! It’s a slasher movie and the macho men are the prey for a terrifying killer. Our final girl Arnold Schwarzenegger only wins by embracing those macho tropes and adapting them to a new foe. I think it’s a film where you can read it on the most surface level imaginable and deeply analyze it and still come to the exact same conclusion either way: This movie fucking rules.

42. The Batman

Live action Batman movies have been good, but too many of them miss core aspects of what makes Batman, well, Batman. Even the best ones like The Dark Knight, Batman Returns, or even Batman & Robin miss a few aspects and, while great films in their own right, just don’t feel like the definitive Batman. Then one half of the dudes behind Felicity took a crack at it and boy does he get it. This is what Batman should be. There’s detective work, there’s action, there’s car chases and gadgets, and most fascinatingly it’s an origin story but not in the way you think; rather than him becoming Batman, it’s him learning to become a symbol of hope instead of a symbol of fear. Robert Patinson proves he is one of the greatest talents of his age, and Paul Dano brings a deranged campiness to his Riddler that helps keep things comic booky even in a realm of grounded realness. And then there’s Colin Farrell’s Penguin, who is so good he got his own spin off show. It has never been a better time for Batman fans when it comes to cinema; we are eating good.

41. Guardians of the Galaxy

I was a bit skeptical at this film when I sat down to watch it. I mean, these were heroes I’d never heard of headlining a Marvel film when they seemed to be hitting their stride. Then the film opened with a crushing emotional moment, and then it goes into the opening credits as Chris Pratt dances like a goober to “Come and Get Your Love.” It all clicked for me, and it only got better from there as it morphed into the greatest “group of assholes become a found family” I ever saw at the time. I do think it’s the weakest of the trilogy now; Ronan is not a compelling villain and aside from that Redbone tune that opens the movie, the soundtrack kind of sucks (“Cherry Bomb?” Fucking seriously?). But when it comes to the Guardians, “weakest” is still “one of the best goddamn sci-fi action films you’ll ever watch.” It’s nice getting a reminder Chris Pratt is actually a good actor at any rate.

40. Raiders of the Lost Ark

I think even I can concede that The Last Crusade is objectively the best Indy film. I mean, it has Sean Connery in it, after all. But sometimes you just gotta let your nostalgia take the wheel, and when it does it tells me this one deserves the higher spot. No mattter what Sheldon Cooper says, this is one of the best and most thrilling pulp action movies ever made, and one of Spielberg’s finest blockbusters. If nothing else, it definitely has the best opening and arguably the best climax of the whole series. And maybe this is a hot take unless you’re Harrison Ford himself, but Indy > Han Solo.

39. Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

It’s honestly amazing how this movie got me to give a shit about so many characters I wouldn’t ever have really thought about much otherwise. Miles Morales went from a cool footnote to one of my favorite Spider-Men, Gwen Stacy went from the dead love interest to a cool and alive love interest, Kingpin went from the best mob boss villain in comic books to the best mob boss villain in comic book movies… and that’s not even getting into how creatively this film uses the multiverse and the concept of variants. It’s really no big surprise just about every superhero movie in the coming years tried to crib its style.

38. The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

This movie is ass-numbingly long, especially if you’re watching the extended version (and I always do—weird bits that kind of rob suspense aside the death of Sauruman, the Mouth of Sauron, and Harvey Weinstein orc getting killed are too good to pass up) and it has about a dozen endings, but you can’t really say any of it is unearned considering what came before it. This is truly an amazing capstone to the most epic fantasy trilogy ever made, and not once in that monstrous runtime does it ever feel like any time is wasted.

37. The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

This is the Western, and easily Clint Eastwood’s greatest performance ever. But despite how unflinchingly cool and badass he is, and despite how terrifying Lee Van Cleef is as the villain, it is Eli Wallach as the titular “ugly,” an all-too human lout, who manages to be the most fascinating character in the story. The final showdown is one of the greatest in all of cinema, and the Ennio Morricone score is iconic. If you only ever watch one Western in your life, make it this one.

36. The Prestige

Christopher Nolan may not know how to write women, but he sure knows how to take a batshit premise and deliver on it. This film about dueling magicians takes at least a half dozen turns, each crazier than the last, and makes rewatches oh so rewarding. Plus, David Bowie plays Tesla. That’s fucking rad.

35. Oldboy

When a film starts off with a man eating a live octopus onscreen, you know you’re in for something special. This might be one of the greatest “revenge really fucking sucks” stories ever made and one of the greatest downer endings of all time. The twist is genuinely a curveball of epic proportions, and the villain is one of the most heinous yet sympathetic you could ever hope to see. It’s a damn good movie that definitely should never be remade with Marvel actors.

34. Fight Club

I get you’re not supposed to talk about this one, but it’s hard not to considering how liking this movie can easily be misconstrued as being an endorsement of cult-like anarchism and chud ideologies. I like this movie because of its critiques of capitalism as well as its examination of the kind of guy Tyler Durden is, and also because this movie is super fucking gay. It also has Jared Leto getting his face caved in by Ed Norton. Literally every aspect of this movie is ridiculously appealing.

33. The Room

I fucking love bad movies, and this? This is the Citizen Kane of bad movies. Tommy Wiseau’s magnum opus is the sort of bad movie that comes along only once in a generation, something so spectacularly bad it must be seen to be believed. Hell, the reason I love Cats so much is it somehow manages to capture the absurd insanity of this film with a bigger budget, but this one is still better because rather than being an adaptation it is the singular vision of an egotistical blowhard who thought he was making great art. And you know what? He was right. This is the pinnacle of “so bad, it’s good.”

32. Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse

And you thought I was insane for preferring Glass Onion over Knives Out! Well, look here! I like the sequel so many “genius” animation critics derided as “incomplete” or “half a story.” I’m not the brightest guy on the planet, but even I understand the concept of cliffhangers and dark endings that set up future storylines; it’s like these people have never seen The Empire Strikes Back, which this is very much in the vein of. I think for me while the original film has a better and more focused story and a more interesting villain with Kingpin, the scope and the more impressive work done with the animation elevate this one above the first film in my mind.

31. Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves

A Guardians of the Galaxy clone based on a TTRPG that has famously had bad luck with adaptations and starring a cast of absurdly famous people you wouldn’t expect to give a damn about telling a compelling story in this setting… Truly, this was a disaster waiting to happen. But that’s just it: It didn’t happen. This is the best fantasy film we’ve gotten in ages, and a movie that is faithful to the concept of D&D. What I mean is that while it’s not literally adapting a specific storyline, it very much feels like the average campaign, to the point you can basically see where each character nat 20s and where they crit fail. You can see where the DM is like “fuck it” and has them conveniently solve a puzzle, and where they sat back and let the party fuck around. This movie gets D&D, and the entire cast is a blast to watch and they have great chemistry. We need more of these films, dammit!

30. Puss in Boots: The Last Wish

Speaking of movies it was easy to write off before seeing, here’s a sequel to a mediocre Shrek shrek spinoff made years after that franchise went dormant. But the movie is so fresh, funny, and vibrant it’s like that Shrek spirit was never gone. Puss is as fun as he’s always been, and the movie manages to tackle his insecurities and grappling with his own mortality with surprising grace for a family comedy film. It also has three of the most fantastic antagonists in Dreamworks history with the anti-villain Goldilocks, the relentless force of nature that is the Wolf, and the hilarious card-carrying villain Big Jack Horner. Truly, this franchise isn’t ogre yet.

29. Aladdin

For the longest time I called this my favorite Disney movie, and how could I not? Robin Williams and Gilbert Gottfried turn in some of the best and funniest performances of their careers here! The songs are absolutely fantastic! Aladdin is a great male lead and Jasmine is a really fun and compelling princess! It got a live action remake that’s actually decent and watchable! And, well, it’s obviously still pretty damn high up there. I’ve just come to realize there’s a couple Disney films I like a little better than this after all.

28. Seven Samurai

This is basically the birthplace of modern action movies, with tropes typical of the genre put on display for the first time and unbuilt at their conception. There’s a lot of commenatry on class and the nature of samurai, ridiculous feats of badassery, and one of the most poignant bittersweet endings imaginable. There’s a reason so many other films across the years have aped this one’s premise.

27. Terminator 2: Judgment Day

James Cameron’s magnum opus, and an action film that redefines cinematic action. It’s just a damn good film with stunning action, but I think there’s a few things that need to be addressed here. For one, as much as people love hyping up Sarah Connor as some feminist ideal or “one of the good ones” when it comes to female characters, she’s kind of a shitty person for most of the runtime, only regaining her humanity and her right to call herself John’s mother with the help of the T-800. And speaking of him, Schwarzenegger truly shows off his genuinely incredible acting chops, between his comedic attempts to emote and his delivery of the most tearjerking thumbs up in all of cinema. And then, finally, there’s Robert Patrick as the T-1000, easily one of the coolest and most intimidating villains in sci-fi, which is all the more impressive since he is scary and a believable menace when going up against a mountain of a man like Schwarzenegger.

26. Nope

In my opinion Jordan Peele has gone three for three with fantastic films, and this one is not only no exception, it’s my favorite he’s made so far. Such a wacky premise delivered in an impressive way, a truly breathtaking monster design, and two of the most unnerving scenes in recent horror history, Peele manages to cement his place as a modern master of his craft.

[wutherwaves]

hello i hope you're well! i had a question: were you considering explaining how the pity in wuwa works? if i have the wrong person i apologize!

thank you! and yes, i believe i was :) keep in mind this information may easily be wrong/incorrect as it's based off of pre-release versions (mostly CBT2)

putting under a cut because it's a lot LOL

banners include

a beginner banner (intended for new accounts to receive at least 1 standard 5* character at only 50 pulls (10 pulls should also be at a slight discount, making it really cost 40))

a permanent standard character banner (includes all standard 5* characters and likely all 4*'s added to the game)

a permanent standard weapon banner (includes all standard 5* weapons; this has a 100% guarantee rate-up for a weapon of YOUR choosing)

a limited character banner (includes a limited 5* character for a set amount of time, as well as three 4* characters having a higher pull rate)

a limited weapon banner (includes the above banner's character's signature weapon; like the standard one, it has a 100% guarantee)

similar to HYV games, limited 5* characters drop on a 50/50 chance, which becomes a 100% guarantee if you lose the first time. the conversion rate of IRL currency to astrite is also identical to HYV's rates, and astrite to pull currency is also the same (160:1)

unlike HYV games, the "hard pity" point (at which you get your 5* no matter what) is a bit lower, at 80 pulls, and soft pity is speculated to begin around 65

as far as i know there are also 3 different pull currencies, which may incentivize astrite hoarding rather than converting early; 1 for all standard banners, 1 for limited characters, and 1 for limited weapons

other things to note that may or may not be true for launch:

the beginner banner may have a 5* character picker (meaning, you choose who your guarantee drop at 50 pulls is)

gaining a 5* character on the beginner banner before your 50th pull should not reset or cancel out the banner (meaning you can get multiple if you're lucky)

you gain oscillate coral and afterglow coral from pulling weapons and characters. while you can use afterglow coral to buy more pulls, CBT2 saw the ability to purchase wavebands (constellations/eidolons/etc.) for characters, including currently running limited ones. if this feature remains at launch, saving your afterglow coral can mean getting up to 2 (iirc) extra copies of a character, though i believe this can only be redeemed after obtaining said character once

hope this helps!! i can try to answer any other questions + if anyone else has differing/additional information that is also appreciated

[twstgameplay]

Real quick because I didnt realise I had anime NYC tokens, I could redeem a guaranteed Dorm card for 100 coins or I could redeem a 10 key...

Im not sure should I use it on trying to break a Dorm card or use it to help increase my pulls om glorious masq, Ive been slowly pulling everyday with 10 paid gems due to it equaling to 3 pulls a day for 30 gems and right now im on 173 pity, on the day that its finally gone I would have exactly 180 due to getting a key from the unified exam store, I currently have 150 free gems and about 1000 paid gems so I could just pull to get that last 20 but I feel using paid gems to pull is very wasted due to the value you get from bundles. I'm pulling to get more copies of Masq Idia (lvl 85 n trying to get meta cosmic basic team) and I already have 1 copy of Azul and Mall. BUT for Dorms most of them aren't that high level, the only one whos max is Floyd who got to 100 when I was pulling for Mall. The only Dorm I dont have is Ruggie but he's not that useful meta wise so I dont mind waiting a little longer for him to spook me but for meta SSRs I cant decide if I want to level them over Masq T-T I'll list them their levels so you can help me decide which key should I get

Lvl 80 : Cater, Deuce, Leona

Lvl 85: Jamil, Kalim, Vil, Rook, Idia, Ortho

Lvl 90: Ace, Riddle, Azul, Epel

Lvl 95: Trey, Jack, Jade

Lvl 100: Floyd

So Im not sure if I should choose Masq Idia over upgrading one of these Dorm cards :/

Thank you for taking the time to read this lengthy ask!

Hello!

While I agree that it's better to boost event cards over dorm cards, I also agree that you're probably better off saving your paid gems for future bundles. For instance, New Years and anniversary are coming soon in EN, and they have some of the good bundles for paid gems (and with 1000 paid gems, you'll be able to afford the most expensive bundle for both events since they typically cost 490 paid gems). The New Year event with Ruggie and Sebek also had a paid SSR key that allowed you to get either Ruggie or Sebek at random, so if EN carries that over, and you want either of them, all the more you'd want to save your paid gems.

So I'd say go for LB-ing a Dorm card. If you really want to think about meta, my opinion would be:

Dorm Trey -> The one I'd recommend the most. He's at the 3rd limit break. He'd be really useful come MLB, especially when EN gets the MLB stat boost eventually.

Dorm Riddle, Rook, and Ortho -> Second most recommended because further LB means higher attack/power. Personally, I'd say Riddle since he's closer to MLB than Rook and Ortho, but that's up to you.

Dorm Leona -> Third recommended. I don't know how your Water Basic is like, but if you struggle in that, getting Leona to LB would be really useful.

Dorm Azul and Idia -> Fourth recommended. Always great to have Azul's attack/power and heal boosted or Idia's HP raised further, but unless you're struggling hard in defense tests, they're cards that can always be duped in banners eventually. Their levels are pretty good as they are.

Dorm Jade -> Fifth recommended. I only recommend just so both tweels are Lv.100. xD

~ 🐙

[magpies4nights]

(Title is a joke don’t take this seriously (please don't go to Ecuador)) GASA4AM COSPLAY MEET UP AT 0°47'03.1"S 91°00'09.9"W 1:00 PM ECT, BE THERE OR BE SQUARE!!!! (dev log #10)

Hi guys. I haven't died yet, for the people who are waiting on my downfall. It felt like I was dying because I was sick! yippee! I mean, I still am, but I can walk around mask free because it's basically just a little itchiness in my windpipe, but compared to last week Friday (I felt so sick I couldn't even get out of bed without the help of my parents dragging me out or even lift my head for that matter), I feel great. With how sick I was, I kinda didn't get to work on the fan game as I hoped I could. Of course, I could have requested to have a break from classes, but I think they wouldn't be so lenient without a covid test and I'm sure it would have been negative. I also had to do homework on top of having a sniffly nose and walking around like I was hit by a car. You know heavy machinery? I had to deal with that with fogged up glasses. My mom apparently said that her dad lost part of his finger to a table saw, and I thought I was going to have history repeat itself, although hopefully that doesn't mean the 90's are making a come back. The only good thing that may have happened was the MTV shows, Humongous Entertainment games and the Parappa series. And before you argue with me, Nirvana started in the 80's, and Titanic (1999) is not a good movie. Rose didn't love Jack, she basically kills him in the end because there WAS enough room on that door. Everyone who says she didn't kill him is a Rose apologist/j

Anyways, no more depressing shit for now. I’m almost done with the locations. At last. I have one more to do and then it's everyone else’s sprites and maybe rework Xandra’s because there are some animation errors in her sprites such as her ears disappearing when she walks. So yeah, next week when I finally have down time and feel better I can work on them. With the way things are going I'll probably have to update y'all the week after my birthday (which is late March. You guys will know when I change my bio from 20 to 21 (whopee I get to finally drink *shudders*)), because good god, classes are also going real hard on me. Midterm on the 6th? No thank you. Not after that essay you made us write which I practically had several panic attacks because I thought that piece of shit was going to fail me. If you're asking if I failed, no, surprisingly it got me a 100. I don't know if the teacher gave me pity points but somehow she said my clarity and my content was great which is surprising because there is no way someone who is practically having a panic attack and is really sleep deprived could ever do that (me when I was writing that).

I’ll be honest, the bottom floor for the house was a nightmare because there would be times when I had to figure out how the hell it would do the thing I wanted it to do based on Xandra’s location.

Anyways, music time. For possibly the last time for dev blogs for this project:

WATER BOWL💧🥣 WATER- 🗣️ WATER- 🗣️WATER- 🗣️WATER BOWL💧🥣🗣️ W-W-W-W-WATER ✨𝓫𝓸𝔀𝓵✨ (I was sick (and I still am) when I made that song)

(I guess there's now 2 songs with vocals)

Oh yeah I also drew up some stuff to make up for Valentine’s Day because I think it’s funny. And also it’s to cope with the pain of when my parents said go to bed and I was sick and bored and I couldn't lift my head up.

I also drew up something which was an old concept I had with Priyah, where instead of just pestering Xandra she did it to everyone by disguising herself as an erson (specifically as a holiday erson) and since there was no valentines verson in GASA4AM that I knew of I decided maybe she could pretend to be one of them.

(Translation because I know my handwriting is horrendous: Hi guys I’m Valentine’s Verson but you can call me Val. I’m like your 4th cousin. (These guys don’t look convinced))

Trust me you will recognize her in that Valentine’s version/Val disguise once you smack her glasses on her and take the lipstick off.

[tightjeansjavi]

Hello Gi!!! Can I request 🧸 & 🌟 for Beanie from Slow Hands 🥹🧡

Charlie, how did I know you were going to ask this? 👀

🧸 A headcanon about their childhood

I actually haven’t put a ton of thought into Beanie’s childhood but considering she is a creative being, she probably picked that up from her parents. I imagine her mom was some kind of artist (probably acrylic painting and free-hand drawing) that taught at a local college and her dad worked in the theater department and that’s how her parents met. She’s an only child, and her weekends at home consisted of early morning cartoons and lots of time outside playing with the neighborhood kids. She’s a 70’s-80’s baby (what a time to be alive) I totally imagine her parents raised her in the granola lifestyle, and her parents were 100% hippies without a doubt. Her childhood was filled with laughter and color and she was always encouraged to follow her dreams, no matter how big or small they were 🥹

🌟 A headcanon about their desires/wishes

I think Beanie has 3 desires in her life now; validation, acceptance, and peace. Validation and acceptance can be tied together but I think she especially seeks validation from her peers in Jackson that she’s doing okay. Considering she’s living in a post-apocalyptic world, her mindset on life has drastically changed and she’s seeking human connection more than ever. She just wishes she had someone to tell her on her rough days/nights that she’s doing okay. She’s important. She’s loved and she’s not alone. She’s seeking acceptance in the community because majority of the members in Jackson think she’s the nutty coffee woman who has her head in the clouds 90% of the time. I think she just wants people to accept her as a normal person who is trying to navigate in this new life just like everyone else is. She knows she sticks out like a sore thumb, but the three people who have not judged her once is Tommy, Joel, and Ellie (Maria as well, but there was a time when she started to show pity towards Beanie and Tommy had to tell her to just treat her like anyone else so she wouldn’t feel isolated)

Finally, she desires peace. Any form of peace that she can grasp because I can only imagine how frustrating and terrifying it must feel like to not fully recognize and remember your trauma. I feel terrible for her because it’s obvious that on the inside she is struggling immensely and she’s able to put up this facade through soft smiles and a gentle voice, but guess who sees right through it? Joel. He wants her to find that peace within her body and her mind, but as much as he wants to help her, she needs to want that for herself as well. It’s going to be a rough journey for her, but ultimately she will find that peace and solace that she is desperately craving.

I could go on and on about her I swear 🥺

[thatnerduknow98]

Her nose was just as long and crooked as it was 100 years ago when she first transformed me, but she died her hair pink to keep up with the times.

It’s 2023 now, after all. And today is the centennial anniversary of the day I went from a lovely little 12 year old taking a stroll in a grass patch with her father after a baseball game, to the oldest tree in the park.

It wasn’t an accident. Daddy spent all day calling me his beautiful little princess, so naturally when I saw the hag sitting on the bench I flaunted my attractiveness to her in a rude and distasteful manner.

She ignored me mostly until I made a comment about her nose being twisted like a tree root, gnarly and ugly. She whipped up off the bench so fast and pointed her finger at me violently. What came next was a woosh that pushed Daddy to the ground.

Then I was a tree. Right where we were standing. Daddy’s cries and pleas to the woman were pitiful, and then they turned to anger when she refused to turn me back. She vanished into thin air and I’d never seen her again.

The last century wasn’t too bad though. Daddy visited me every day, spending hours upon hours under the shade of my canopy. He removed harmful plants and fungi that grew up the side of my trunk, clipped back dead branches, and even planted more trees next to me because he read somewhere that trees survive better in a wooded area than by themselves.

He had a new baby a few years later and raised him to care for me just as well. My brother took over after Daddy could no longer walk. Little bro planted a more diverse garden around me.

The others in the town enjoyed the new plants and such so much that I became the hang out spot for many mothers and babies, soccer games, first dates, and picnics with grandparents. I listened as they talked about the happenings of the world. I particularly liked the political speech of my town.

Apparently the land I was a part of was owned by the town, so my brother ran for town council to have it turned into a park. By then, he had two kids who had also begun the “taking care of big sister” routine. Little bro had no other knowledge on anything at all, but he loved greenery and taking care of it more than anyone else, and everyone agreed it was important. I became the steeple of the Skillman Town Park, formally recognized and dedicated in 1972.

More and more individuals came to the park and it grew quite large. The trees Daddy planted did draw in new wildlife and nutrients that helped me grow super tall and thrive quite a bit. It was peaceful. Even in the winter, under two-five feet of snow, I felt good.

I only thought that being a tree was a burden for a little while. The hag turned me to a tree because I compared her nose to it’s ugly twists, but honestly the twists and knots are what make trees beautiful. At least, that’s what the arborist said while giving a tour sometime in the 1930s.

And as more people came to sit by me and discuss their happenings with their own, I learned more about how awful the human world is. I thought it was really bad in the ‘40s, but each decade just seems to be getting worse. In the 2020s, women HAVE to work to afford their own place to live, and the rent is absolutely outrageous.

I’m glad I’m a tree. I live for free and I don’t have to work or spend money to feed myself. I think it’s my great grand nieces and nephews now who take care of me — I’ve started losing track of my relatives honestly. And I’m outside all the time in the sun. I’m beautiful year round without needing the cosmetics the women all wear now. And I don’t have to worry about fitting societal norms because I’m a tree, and that’s pretty normal.

The city has only tried to cut me down one time, in the mid ‘80s. It was shut down pretty quickly after the proposing councilman’s home was TP’ed by environmental teenagers in support of expanding the park.

And my park has grown too. There are softball diamonds and soccer fields. Even a cross country course. I get to watch sports all year round.

So when the witch made her reappearance, with her crooked nose, she was appalled to find me in such a state of peace. I informed her politely that I was perfectly fine with the way I am, and thanked her for rewarding me with a wonderful life.

I didn’t want to be mean to her because I was afraid she’d turn me human again, and a 12 year old girl with no parents is not the situation you want to be in in this time, as I learned from the 12 year old homeless girl who slept under my roots last night.

But that didn’t seem to matter. The witch stared at me, with her crooked nose, and decided to just leave me there. She came back every few weeks to pull the fungi off my bark to use in her potion making. So it all worked out in the end.

You angered a witch, and in retaliation, she transformed you into an unmovable tree in a public park. Months later, she returns with the sinister hope of reveling in your suffering, only to find that you are not only surviving but thriving and happier than ever before.