#for esme with love and squalor

[jeaninesfavouriteserum]

me 🤝 slipping v.f.d. into everyday conversations and praying someone understands me

[erenfox]

guys is there a scientific term for the condition where you just love shipping toxic ships? like seriously. i have no fucking idea why i ship joker x harley quinn or count olaf x esme squalor sm HELP 😭

[lazthecat3]

why does esmé love being "in"

ok so a tiktok got me thinking about this as they point out that not only was the sugar bowl esmé's prized possession but it was also a way to show that esmé was TRUSTED to hold it.

you maybe wondering how this relates to esmé's love for in and out (not the restaurant) well since she was most likely high in the ranks of vfd that means a lot of the ideology was instilled in her for example the plentiful amount of rules

since she was so use to having a set goal layed out for her she didn't know what to do after completing her mission;being a powerful person in the economy

so without a set goal she look at her interest of fashion and decided to make her life center around it

esmé has been betrayed by others without doing anything wrong she just loved money and disliked books and deemed a villain she didn't care for the insides of the sugar bowl she just wants her friends trust back

was she so untrustworthy to take away her duty and their trust in her?

this iis why I love esmé and loathe Beatrice

Esmé deserved better than Beatrice

[artements]

Gustav: "Can you call me?"

Jacquelyn: "Hang on, I'm finishing a Pokémon battle. I'll be with you in a minute."

-

Esme, to Kit over the phone: "Yeah, he's on my list."

Esme, filing her nails: "Marriage, not hit."

-

Olivia: "The multiple failed assassination attempts against me have helped build both character and self-esteem."

-

Beatrice: "Everyone is addicted to my fun and flirty personality. Lives have been destroyed."

-

Monty: "Do you even have a type?"

Jacques: "Yeah. Women I'm slightly afraid of."

[cerseis-fav-maiden]

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Rules for Asks / Masterlist

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I write predominantly write wlw or nblw !

Only wlw smut!!

I do write mlw or mlnb just not as commonly!!!

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• I am picky with my smut writing it really depends on who or what it is!!

• I will default do a fem reader unless you specify gender neutral

•no incest, pedophilia, rape, present day physical abuse past is ok but I will not write current abuse

• I will write pretty much any fluff!!

• I don’t write for characters I do not know I’ll include the fandoms I write for at the end

• if you are vague in your ask I may add things to it so if you want something super specific…be specific!!

• headcannons are good to ask for too but limited to 1 fandom (specify your characters you want)

• poly is ok limit of 3 people and

Has to be character x reader x character

• no character x characters unless poly

• I will not commonly write character cheats on reader or other way around..unless it’s about a past ex

• I have some male characters listed and I would only do fluff for them !!

• for DC characters, I have played the Batman games so if you want a storyline based on that lemme know

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Fandoms

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ResiVillage

Lady Dimitrescu

Mother Miranda

Donna Benivento

Charlize Theron

Lady Lesso

Elaine Markinson

Lorraine Broughton

Charlotte Feild

(Pretty much any of her characters)

Gwen Christie

Not kidding literally any of her characters!!

G o T

Cersei Lannister

Brienne of Tarth

Margery Tyrell

Catelyn Stark

Catherine Zeta Jones

Velma Kelly

Vicki Ellis

Billie Pearce

Mortica

( most of her characters )

Overwatch

Ashe

Widowmaker

Moira

Mercy

Cassidy

Junker Queen

OUAT

Regina Mills

The Evil Queen

Maleficent

Maleficent

Harry Potter

Molly Weasly

Narcissa Malfoy

Sirius Black

ASOUE

Esme Squalor

Olivia

Addams Family

Mortica

Gomez

DC in general

Harley Quinn

Poison Ivy

Catwoman

Abbott Elementary

Melissa Schmmenti

The Walking Dead

Maggie

Negan

Daryl

Pedro Pascal

Agent Whiskey

Oberyn Martell

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Honestly I think you get my vibe based off that list so if there’s some you don’t know if you can ask for message me and I’ll let you know never shame in asking questions!!

[tragediaandcomedia]

Shoutout to the worst girlfail girlboss couple of all time/lhj/pos

Fr tho ASOUE brainrot is STRONG and so i present these two as a result of it

[essily]

heres the link to the playlist i made

[malusienki]

kitme..

[lazthecat3]

like Esmé once said she loves freaks soooo I will match your freak

Who’s gonna match my freak (reviving the asoue fandom)

[jeaninesfavouriteserum]

hello, hello! consider this a fiction call for help: anyone fictionhearted/fictionkin, or anyone with a hearthome, this is for you!

i'm looking for ways to feel closer to the characters i hold so dear and ways to feel closer to my hearthome (as well as what might be a second one?? i'm still not sure on it). the characters in question are currently:

- my f/o, jeanine matthews <3 (divergent)!

- esmé squalor (asoue)

- cruella de vil (101 dalmatians)

my hearthome is chicago, from divergent! i'm looking for ways to:

- feel a little closer to chicago

- feel more like part of v.f.d. (it may be a hearthome, it may not be, i have no idea :) i just want to feel closer to there)

plsplspls comment/reblog with tips and ideas, your girl is getting desperate out here :D anyway, thanks for reading this far, and have a lovely day!!!

[hypokeimena]

please read for esme with love and squalor. link. thanks.

[erenfox]

talk about jealousy holy shit

wow

[badlydrawndrawnings]

ASOUE Characters (The Adults)

And the Beatles Songs I Can't Help But Associate Them With

Lemony Snicket, In My Life (~All these places had their moments/With lovers and friends, I still can recall/Some are dead and some are living/In my life, I've loved them all~)

Beatrice Baudelaire, Golden Slumbers (~Golden slumbers fill your eyes/Smiles await you when you rise/Sleep pretty darling do not cry/And I will a lullaby~)

Bertrand Baudelaire, All My Loving (~All my loving, I will send to you/All my loving/Darling, I'll be true/All my loving/All my loving, Ooh/All my loving, I will send to you~)

Count Olaf, Norwegian Wood (This Bird Has Flown) (~I once had a girl/Or should I say she once had me/She showed me her room/Isn't it good Norwegian Wood?~) + (~And when I awoke I was alone/This bird had flown/So I lit a fire/Isn't it good Norwegian wood?~)

Esme Squalor, Girl, being the Girl in question, not the 'singer'* (~She's the kind of girl who puts you down/When friends are there/You feel a fool/When you say she's looking good/She acts as if it's understood~)

*The 'singer' of 'Girl' is Jerome Squalor, who has strong feelings of his former marriage with Esme, more bad than good

Jacques Snicket, While My Guitar Gentle Weeps (~I look at the world and I notice it's turning/While my guitar gently weeps/With every mistake we must surely be learning/Still my guitar gently weeps~)

Kit Snicket, Help* [~When I was younger so much younger than today/I never needed anybody's help in any way/(Now) But now these are gone (These days are gone)/I'm not so self assured/(And now I find) Now I've changed my mind/And opened up the doors~]

*Despite the upbeat tone, the lyrics really do fit Kit

Dewey Denouement, A Day in the Life (~I read the news today, oh boy/About a lucky man who made the grade/And though the news was rather sad/Well, I just had to laugh/I saw the photograph~) + (~A crowd of people stood and stared/They'd seen his face before/Nobody was really sure if he was from the House of Lords~)

Ernest Denouement, Carry That Weight (~Boy, you're gonna carry that weight/Carry that weight a long time/Boy, you're gonna carry that weight/Carry that weight a long time~)

Frank Denouement, You Never Gave Me Your Money (~You never give your money/You only give me your funny paper/And in the middle of negotiations/You break down~)

[dollsome-does-tumblr]

i just love a blonde lady who's kind of scary 💛

[brontesisters]

thanks @mistressaccost for the tag!

favorite song of the moment: so, so many ! bowled over by the amount of new music i love. ya ya by beyonce, gen-x cops by vampire weekend, so american by olivia rodrigo, good luck babe by chappell roan, evil spawn by waxahatchee, don’t forget me by maggie rogers. all playing on a loop in my head

current obsession: could u have asked me this at a less embarrassing time… last month i finally watched bridgerton s2 after years of my friend begging me to watch it. and fine! she was correct! anyway i feel like this is going 2 reignite my life-long period drama obsession. me & a different friend are reading our first persephone book this month so i may only get worse

style: lana is my eternal style obsession but my current style crush is this girl at my work who wears pinstriped trousers and emerald green jumpers and shiny mary janes. she dresses like she was raised by esme squalor & i want her wardrobe so badly

celebrity crush: currently muted due to the epic highs & lows of having a real-life crush. but re: above comment. it is simone ashley

favorite food and drink: pasta and rhubarb gin with lemonade

place where i’d like to live: wish i could spend an entire summer living in france

hobby: going to old movie screenings in the city !! i went to a silent film screening last weekend and chatted to the 40 yr old man sitting next to me and the 50 yr old woman sitting next to him, and they told me abt more screenings that are coming up. it was literally SO lovely i want to be a part of this little community

i tag @satellitemp4 @nicholasbritellhive @jareauwalker if u feel like it

[beatricebidelaire]

anya you get it. you get the vision.

following this up

"you're marrying him?" ernest exclaims. "are you kidding me? you're supposed to become his financial advisor and get him to sell the penthouse apartment to one of our people, not marry him and live there with him!"

"i had to do a quick change of plan!" esme says. "he proposed to me - that man doesn't want a financial advisor, he wants a wife, so i improvised. what's wrong with that? i'll still gain access to the apartment."

"we don't need access - for you and you only, apparently - we need ownership," ernest scoffs. "are you sure you didn't just see how the place looked and decided that you want to live there yourself, after all?"

"oh relax," esme rolls her eyes. "i'll gain the ownership eventually, convince him to transfer the apartment to me. the results will be the same - without having to actually pay the money, i might add. i didn't realize it would be so easy, that he's so desperate to get married. but now he is, this is a great chance."