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smoke and mirrors - chris sturniolo
chapter three
summary: your best friend Matt backs out of plans you had made together, so you replace him with his brother. the only problem is the two of you canât stand each other.
{enemies to lovers, fake dating}
includes : explicit language, fluff, smut(penetration, oral, fingering, etc.), angst if you squint, lots of bickering, slow burn
tw: slight body issues in this chapter.
wc: 3.2k
-
The wedding was in a week and you found yourself out shopping with the triplets trying to find Chris a tie that would match your dress, which was just a simple, deep red, slim fitting, sleeveless dress. It was sexy and flattering, but nowhere near enough to draw attention from the bride or bridal party.
You had been shopping for a while, mostly goofing off, but now you guys had made it to Menâs Warehouse and were actually looking for what you needed. You carried around a swatch of your dress color so you could find something as close as possible, holding it up to every dark red tie you found, but nothing was to your liking just yet.
âHow about this one?â Chris asks, holding another one up, and you walk over and hold up your swatch, shaking your head. âToo bright,â you say, to which he groans.
âWeâve looked at like twenty different ties, one of these has to match,â he complains, putting the tie back.
âThe perfect match is out there, I know it is. We just have to keep looking,â you tell him, still perusing the array of options throughout the store.
Matt and Nick followed behind you guys, chit chatting with each other while you and Chris bickered over whether or not the reds matched, which they obviously didnât.
âHavenât you ever seen those pictures on the internet?â You ask Chris.
He raises an eyebrow, looking down at you. âVery descriptive, I definitely have,â he replies sarcastically.
You roll your eyes. âYou know, the ones where girls ask their boyfriend if they can tell the difference between two really similar nail polishes? Most of them canât tell the difference, but women can! So when you say that these ties are âclose enoughâ, theyâre just not. It has to be perfect, these pictures are going to be around forever, and as much as I wish you werenât in the pictures, I at least want to make sure we look good.â
âStop comparing me to a boyfriend, dude, itâs getting weird,â Chris shudders at the thought and you just shake your head, knowing that he wasnât listening to a damn thing you were saying and is just trying to rush through this store. âHow about this one?â
Chris holds up a tie for you to look at, and you hold your swatch up to it, instantly beaming up at him. âItâs perfect!â You tell him, bouncing on your toes in excitement. âSee? Donât you see how well that matches?â
He looks down at the two colors pressed together and reluctantly nods. âYeah, that looks pretty good,â he agrees.
âGreat!â You smile, grabbing the tie from his hands. âNow we buy this and weâre all done.â
Chris lets out a sigh of relief and turns to his brothers, ready to be done conversing with you for the time being. He makes eye contact with Matt who smiles at him and mouths the words âhelp meâ while pointing towards your frame that happily skipped up to the register.
Matt laughed and patted Chris on the shoulder. âYou agreed to it,â he tells him.
Back at the triplets house, youâre all crowded in Nickâs room, your dress laid out on his bed and Chrisâs suit laid right next to it. âYou put yours on first,â you tell him.
You wanted to see how you guys looked together before the actual day of the wedding, so you decided to try everything on now that you guys were both home and had corresponding outfits. You had brought your dress over earlier before you went shopping so that it was ready for you when you guys got back home.
Chris picks up his suit from the bed and walks into Nickâs bathroom, shutting the door behind him.
âHow are you handling being Chrisâs girlfriend?â Nick asks curiously, waggling his eyebrows at you.
You just laugh. âItâs not that bad, we just take pictures together every so often, but itâs just pictures. As much as I hate it I just have to remind myself that heâs giving me a date to a wedding so I donât have to hear everyone asking me why I donât have a boyfriend. A couple pictures in return for a night of silence sounds like a win to me.â
Nick and Matt chuckle, still shocked that you guys agreed to help each other in such an intimate way, considering your history.
��Why do I have a feeling you guys are going to fall in love?â Nick teases, but you just scoff at him.
âYeah, right. Iâd rather date you,â you smirk at Nick and make a kissy face towards him, leaning in like you were going to kiss him.
Nick cringes and puts his hand in your face, pushing you away as you guys hear the door open, Chris walking out in his suit, his tie in his hand.
âI, uh, donât know how to tie this,â he says shyly, holding it out, clearly embarrassed.
You look around at his brothers and see them both looking just as clueless as Chris did. âSeriously?â You ask them.
âOur mom or dad always did it for school dances,â Matt tells you. âNever really worn a tie other than that.â
You huff and stand up off the bed, walking over to Chris, snatching the new tie out of his hands. âYou guys are helpless,â you mumble, starting to situate the tie around his neck.
ââM not helpless,â Chris says lowly, his voice slightly pouty.
âOh, of course not,â you reply, looking up at him. âYouâre just a twenty one year old boy that doesnât know how to tie a tie, or fill out forms, or make a restaurant reservationâŚâ you trail off.
âThe fuck? I made a reservation for you and Matt tomorrow,â he argues.
âTomorrow?â Matt whips his head around to look at his brother.
âYeah?â Chris responds, looking at Matt over your head. âI told you Iâd book it and then let you know when it was.â
âYou didnât think to ask first? Chris, I have plans,â Matt groans.
Chrisâs eyes widen. âWhat fucking plans?! You never go anywhere.â
âI have an actual date tomorrow, I canât make that. You shouldâve told me when it was first or asked when I was free,â Matt tells him, finality clear in his voice.
âKid, I had to put fucking a deposit down for this place, itâs non refundable. You need to go. Just reschedule your date.â Chris tells him.
Matt shakes his head, looking at Chris seriously. âNo, dude, Iâm not rescheduling. You shouldâve asked.â
Chris groans and throws his head back, currently hating his life. You finish up with the tie and reach up to brush off Chrisâs shoulders, then swipe your hands down his arms quickly before backing away. âDone,â you tell him, admiring your work. âYou know, you could just suck it up and grab dinner with me. Iâm not the worst person to be around.â
Chris turns around and goes back in the mirror to look at himself, shrugging a bit. âIâd prefer not to, but I also donât want to lose my deposit.â He walks back out of the bathroom and past you, going to sit on the bed. âAlright, try your dress on now so I can take this off.â
You nod and grab your dress before walking into the bathroom, shutting the door after you. You slip off all of your clothes and step into your dress, pulling the straps over your shoulders. It fits well, and when you bought the dress a couple of months ago, you fell in love with it and the way it looked on your body, but now as you stare in the mirror, pulling the sides tight against your waist as the zipper was still down in the back, you couldnât help but focus on all the imperfections staring back at you in the mirror. It almost makes you fully take the dress off and call it a day, figuring youâll just put it on the day of the wedding and suck it up, but you would feel too bad making Chris get dressed up just to back out.
Youâve never explicitly told any of the triplets about any of your insecurities, just threw a few self deprecating comments out there like people normally do, and for the most part you were a confident person, but everyone had their days, and today was just one of those days.
You reach back and try to pull the zipper up, but youâre only able to zip it about halfway up on your own, so you slip back into your happy demeanor before you open the door and walk out, smiling at the three boys staring back at you. âCan one of you zip me up?â You ask.
Chris stands up from the bed and walks towards you. Youâre shocked to see him volunteering without being coerced into it, but say nothing, afraid to startle him back to his senses. You just turn around and move your hair off your back, pulling it over your shoulder and he reaches out, grabbing the zipper and pulling it all the way up. âGood,â he tells you, and you turn back around to face him again.
âHow do I look?â You ask the room, smiling wide and putting your hands on your hips dramatically. Chris moves out of the way so his brothers can see you, but keeps his eyes on your body.
âThe same as you always look,â he retorts bluntly.
âYou look hot,â Nick nods his head enthusiastically in approval.
âWhat Nick said,â Matt says in agreement. âIâm kind of sad I canât make it now.â
You giggle at Mattâs words, feeling your ears heat up a little bit. You didnât necessarily have a crush on Matt, but you couldnât ignore the fact that he was attractive and his words did have a little bit of an effect on you.
âThanks, guys. Come here, Chris, I want to look at us in the mirror.â You tell him and walk back into the bathroom where he follows you.
You both stand in the mirror together, looking at your outfits. You scrunch your eyebrows together and brush your hands over your dress, trying to pull it in a couple different directions to make it look more flattering on your body.
âWhat are you doing?â Chris asks you, watching you through the mirror as you play with your dress.
âTrying to fix the dress,â you mumble, sucking in a little bit as you turn to the side to stare at your reflection from another angle. âI think I gained a little weight and I just.. donât really like how this is looking.â
Chris turns to look at you instead of your reflection, seeing how distraught you actually looked by the sight of your body in the dress.
âThereâs nothing to fix, the dress is fine.â Chris is clearly uncomfortable at the way youâre speaking, but has no idea how to manage the situation. It was bad enough that he wasnât good at dealing with other peoplesâ emotions, but you two also werenât close, so his urge to run away was even stronger than normal.
âItâs not the dress, I justâŚâ your voice falters, eyes still glued to your body in the mirror. âI look bad.â
âStop it,â he tells you, reaching out to turn your body towards his. You turn and look up to meet his eyes, your own starting to well with tears. âWhy are you crying?â
You sniffle and shrug your shoulders, unable to speak in fear of your voice giving out on you.
He reaches behind himself and shuts the door, blocking his two brothers from earshot of you guys. âWhy are you crying?â He asks you again, more firm this time.
You look down at the ground, sucking in a deep breath. âIâm just upset at how I look,â you tell him, voice high pitched and squeaky. âI really liked this dress when I got it but⌠I donât know how I feel now.â
Chris sighs and reaches forward, placing a finger under your chin so he could tilt up your head. âStop crying,â he tells you. âYou look really good in that dress. Your body is incredible and you know it, thatâs why you always walk around my house in your little booty shorts and a sports bra, isnât it?â
You cough out a laugh and reach up to wipe a couple tears that fell down your cheek. âNot really, Iâm just really comfortable around you guys. Even you wouldnât think to comment on my body. Youâre dumb but youâre not that dumb.â
Chris rolls his eyes at you and shakes his head. âWell, Iâm commenting on it and Iâm telling you that you look fine. Girls would kill to look like you. Once you do your hair and your makeup and shave your legs or whatever girls do youâll feel way better about how you look. So, sort yourself out, change back into your clothes and go cuddle with my brothers or whatever weird shit you do with them.â
You smile and nod, the tears subsiding almost completely as he speaks. âOkay,â you mutter. âThanks.â
âDonât mention it,â Chris replies. âSeriously. Ever. I donât ever want anyone knowing I⌠comforted you.â
You giggle at his words and watch as he turns to leave the bathroom before you try and stop him.
âWait, Chris,â you touch his shoulder and he turns around, looking at you confusedly. âI need you to unzip me.â
âOh,â Chris starts, moving his feet to come back to you. You turn around and place your hands over your breasts to hold the dress in place once itâs unzipped and he reaches up to unzip it down to your lower back, the small spaghetti straps falling off of your shoulders as he does so. âThere you go.â
You turn back around to face him, still holding the dress. His eyes couldnât help but wander, taking one last look at your body, so close to being completely naked in front of him. All you had to do was let go and the dress would fall to the floor-
âI said thanks,â you say loudly and Chris clears his throat, looking back up to your eyes. He doesnât respond, just leaves the bathroom and shuts the door, not even speaking to his brothers before he leaves Nickâs room and heads towards his own.
You turn back to the mirror and drop the dress, staring at yourself a few minutes longer, and the more you stand there, the more you feel your mood shifting, and what started as a judgmental and negative stare slowly turns into you checking yourself out, posing for yourself almost completely naked apart from your underwear. You hum to yourself and send a wink towards your reflection before getting dressed again, walking into Nickâs room.
Right now you wore sweatpants and a loose crop top with the collar cut out so it hung off your shoulders, but you strutted over to Nickâs dresser where you had some clothes you had left and he had so graciously washed for you, digging out a pair of old Nike pros and a sports bra, turning around and smirking at the boys that watched you from the bed, eyes wide.
âWhat⌠happened in there?â Nick asks, scared for the answer.
You just giggle and rip your shirt over your shoulders in front of both boys, causing Matt to gasp and cover his eyes with his fingers, though he mightâve kept a small slit between his pointer and middle finger, who knows, whereas Nickâs eyes just got even wider, his eyes trailing over your body as you pulled the sports bra over your head, changing your bottom half next until you were fully changed, letting Matt know he was okay to look.
âI know youâre my best friend but I am still only a man,â Matt tells you, not so subtly checking you out, which only boosted your confidence more. Maybe you were searching for validation in the wrong people, but fuck it you needed it right now and if Matt and god forbid Chris were going to be the men that made you feel like they were going to melt at the sight of you then so be it.
âItâs like window shopping,â you tell Matt with a grin. âYou can admire but you canât touch.â
Matt couldnât help his cheeks turning slightly darker at your words. âSureâŚâ he replies, definitely not sure.
âAnyway,â you start, clapping your hands together. âYou guys hungry? Iâm in the mood to cook.â
-
You had scrounged up what you could in the tripletsâ kitchen and ended up cooking them some basic pasta, throwing all the boysâ portions onto a plate along with your own, putting everything on the table, calling Matt and Nick to the table who sat on their couch waiting patiently for dinner to be ready.
âIâm gonna get your brother,â you tell them with a smile before skipping towards the stairs, heading down them quickly. âChris?â You call, standing in his doorframe.
He glances up at you quickly then back down at his phone before he rips his head back up, doing a double take, eyes scanning over the new outfit that had adorned your body. âUh,â he drawls, looking up to meet your gaze. âCan I help you?â
You smile and place one foot on top of the other, your front knee buckled slightly, hands placed on the doorframe as you stared back at him where he lay on his bed. âI made dinner. You coming?â
Chris thinks about it for a moment before he shakes his head. âIâm not hungry.â He tells you, looking back down at his phone.
You huff and walk over to him until youâre standing next to his bed, reaching down to grab his phone and pull it behind your back. âAlready made you a plate.â You tell him.
Chris furrows his eyebrows and sits up on the bed, quickly getting frustrated with you. âStop fucking doing that shit every time your spoiled ass doesnât get what you want. Give me my fucking phone.â He says aggressively, voice a tad louder than it normally is.
âNot until you come have dinner with us. I donât want your food going to waste,â you pout, both hands now securely locked behind your back, phone held sideways between them. âDonât be so rude, itâs fucking annoying.â
Chris scoffs out a laugh and shakes his head in disbelief. âIâm rude? Youâre just coming in my room and snatching shit out of my hands like a fucking toddler, that seems pretty rude to me.â
You take a tiny step closer to Chris, jutting out your bottom lip. âPlease?â You beg.
Heâs still for a moment, and at first when his body starts to move, your first thought is that heâs giving in and standing up to go have dinner with you and his brothers, but youâre quickly proven wrong when he stands up and grabs your bicep, flipping your body around. You squeal at the sudden movement, stumbling over your own to feet as he spins you.
What you definitely didnât expect was him facing you towards the bed and grabbing your hands that were still behind your back with one hand, his other hand taking his phone and shoving it in his pocket. He pushes you down on the bed aggressively, your feet still on the floor but your body bent over with your chest pressed into the mattress, leaning over your back until his mouth was next to your ear, making sure you heard the words that were about to fall from his lips.
âWatch your fucking attitude around me before I fucking make you.â
He aggressively shoves your arms, pushing you into the bed roughly as he lets go of you, glaring your way as he starts to walk out of his room, eventually turning his head and exiting, stomping up the stairs.
You use your now free hands to push yourself up until youâre standing straight again, then use them to reach up to your bun that almost completely fell out, grabbing the hair tie and ripping it out.
It took you a moment to process what had happened, but you thought back to it and how it made you feel, and most importantly the newfound throbbing between your legs. You stand there in silence, arms dropped to your sides, until you let out a quiet and confused,
âWhat the fuck?â
-
a/n: the tension is buildinggggg yall feel it??
taglist
@liiixsturniolos @madelinesturn @st6niolo @mattslolita @ifwdominicfike @sophand4n4 @chris-hallelujah @sophsturns @ariana2saucyy @045696 @scorpioosworld @byhrxb @vickytaa @taelovesmattsturniolo @secret-sturniolo @theboredknightcat-blog @slvtf0rchr1s @flouqissss @gabri3la-sturns @delilahsturniolo @starstrucktyrantinfluencer @vanillsstuff @sturnlsstuff @imjusthereforthesturniolosmut @mattsbrat @mattsfavoritestar @dominicfikeenthusiast @certified-sturniolo @chrisslollipop @noplaceissafeanymore @sofiaaguilaxx @idrk2292 @dylansfavwife @pvssychicken @sturnl0ve @sturnioloangelxoxo @afilmbykay @sofia-is-a-sturniolo-triplet-fan @r0s3luvr @milasturniolo @mattsdillion
#chris sturniolo#matt sturniolo#sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo smut#matt x reader#matt x you#chris sturniolo fanfic#chris x you#chris x reader#christopher sturniolo#matthew sturniolo#nick sturniolo#nicolas sturniolo#sturniolo x reader#smoke and mirrors
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Patreon Commission for anon
Request: Iâd like to do a werewolf male. Typical bulk big dicked guy. I want him to have a chubby human female as his mate. She is nervous to have sex because he is so massive, so he âwarms her upâ with fingers turned fisting. I would like it to be soft and gentle, a dom slowly stretching his sub and praising them along the way type deal. Obviously itâs going to be painful for her but praise and loving touches help
A/N: Hope you enjoy this story, it was very fun to write. :)
Sex induced coma
Werewolf x fem!reader || size kink, fisting, praise kink, dom/sub (light), edging, dirty talk
When you started dating your werewolf boyfriend, you knew intimacy was going to be hard between you two. But as a surprise to both of you, it wasnât.
Well, mostly.
He loved to eat you out, to the point of having you coming and coming and coming for hours to an end, your body tired from orgasms, but unable to resist his clever tongue and hot grunts as you gushed around his mouth.
In the same way, you loved going down on him, even though the first time you saw his dick you were literally speechless, staring into a huge cock that could barely fit between your hands. He was massive⌠and you were a big size queen, who could blame you?
He refused to fuck you, he said it was dangerous, he would never fit, you were too small to fitâŚ, and you understood his reasoning⌠but you didnât share his opinion. So you persevered, you asked and begged to be fucked any chance you got. You asked with his fingers inside of you, you asked with his clever tongue against your pearl, and you asked with your little human tongue against his huge cock...
And he denied you over and over, but you knew he was starting to reconsider. You asked over and over again, and you knew he was starting to give in when he smiled at you when you asked. When he teased your pussy for hours, trying to fit another finger inside as you came messily around them.
And then he gave in and indulged in your shared pleasure. He laid you on the bed and got to it, smiling like a wolf as he watched you tremble under his hungry eyes. âAre you ready for this?â He asked.
You struggled to get the words out as his fingers made the first contact with your shivering cunt. âNgh- yes.â You pushed your hips against his hand and he frowned, but his lips twitched, trying to hide a smile.
âNone of that, little minx. You take them as I please, you are not in control here, are you?â His voice was amused and you could see the edge of his mouth twitching, trying not to smile. âAnswer,â he pressed his thumb against your clit intently.
You looked at him, your eyes unfocused because of the pleasure. âN-no. You are.â
âI am what?â He asked again.
âIn control. You are in control.â You assured him, your body shivering at his commanding tone. You didnât know you liked him being in control as much as you did, it was intoxicating in the best way possible.
âGood girl.â His praise made your pussy twitch around his fingers and he chuckled.
He started a slow finger fucking, way too slow for your desperate cunt. You needed more, you wanted more. But he already told you, you had no control over what happened, over what he did or what pace he took. And the fact that you were at his mercy only drove you further into your pleasure.
You moaned and groaned, asking for more. Pleading for more. Little by little he stretched you, stopping every time you felt like you were about to cum, kissing trails across your stomach as he distracted you from your pleasure. Just to start all over again.
He kept teasing your G-spot with his wide fingers until you were sweating and your legs were trembling like crazy. Your pleasure was so high you couldnât stop chanting, a chorus of ah ah ah leaving your mouth at every movement of his two fingers inside of you. His fingers were wide and long, you felt so full... almost to the point of pain.
And he didnât stop talking, âyou are going to feel like a dream around my cock, arenât you?â You moaned in response, unable to form words with three fingers inside of you.
In and out, in and out. Driving you to the edge and stopping. Building up to an orgasm and leaving you dry as your pussy quivered around his fingers and your pussy leaked around his hand. You were drenched by the time he pushed another finger inside. The fourth was a big stretch, your pain and pleasure mixing. He scissored them inside, opening you up, caressing parts of you didnât know existed.
âYou are so tight, good goddess⌠A bit more darling, I know itâs a bit painful but you can take it. Come on, one more.â And then you felt his fifth finger slipping inside. The stretch was so awesome you felt a gush of juices dripping around his fingers, probably soaking his whole wrist. You couldnât even be embarrassed, it was so hot you could only moan in ecstasy as he grunted and asked you to breathe.
When he pushed in his knuckles, and then his whole fist, you screamed his name so loud you were almost sure your whole neighborhood heard you. You felt stretched to the extreme, and his grunts were only making it better. âSuch a good girl, taking my fist so well, you are so tight around me, such a pretty pussy taking me so wellâŚâ His words were borderline non-sense, but you couldnât even understand him properly, your pleasure too high, too intense.
And when you were about to reach an orgasmâŚ
He took out his hand, and you screamed. Your hands flying to his wrist to ask him for more. But then you felt the tip of his cock against your stretched hole. After all his teasing, you could barely be coherent when you asked: âAre you⌠are you gonna?â
He smiled at you sweetly, your whole body trembling in anticipation and pent up frustration. âYes, darling. Are you ready?â
âPlease,â was the only word you could get out.
He pushed inside of you slowly, his dick breaching your stretched pussy. You were glad you took his fist, because it was already a stretch to fit his length inside of you. âYou are doing so well, such a good girl for me. You are taking me so well.â His words of encouragement made you preen, sweaty and on edge of the greatest orgasm of your life as he kept going further and further.
The moment he bottomed out, both of you screamed in ecstasy, the feeling like nothing else youâd ever felt. His face contorted with pleasure, pleasure you were giving him as you tightened around his length. He felt incredibly big, and you still felt so tight around him that you felt the veins of his shaft pulsating against your inner walls. It was exhilarating and your brain was rapidly losing focus as he started a slow pace.
âIâm not- Iâm not gonna last much longer, honey,â he grunted between short hard thrusts.
âI- IâmâŚâ
You didnât even finish that thought before you were screaming his name loud enough to wake up every single bird in the surrounded area, probably your neighbors across town, too. But you didnât care. The orgasm washed over you like the sun hitting snow. It was mind-blowing and full body pleasure that drove you into the next dimension, one where pain and pleasure were the same and you couldnât get enough of either.
You came down to your body as he kept thrusting, his non-sense a mix of âhow goodâ, âhow prettyâ, âso tight and wetâ⌠He was completely gone on his own pleasure, driving you further and further into the race for a second orgasm. His soaked hand found your clit, and his thumb caressed your pearl until your eyes rolled back into your head.
The first shot of come inside of you drove you over the edge, his howling matching your screams. Your orgasm hit you like a brick, leaving you breathless as the world faded and your pussy filled with his seed. There was so much of it, it overflowed your pussy, gushing around his length still buried deep inside of you. It was the best feeling in the universe and your brain could barely process all the pleasure rushing through your body at the same time.
He was kissing your forehead when your neurons got connection back. âTotally doing it again,â you whispered before you fell asleep into a sex-coma with his chuckles as a background sound.
#patreon commission#commission#monster commission#monster fucker#monster#monster imagine#monster x human#teratophillia#monster x reader#terato#monster boyfriend#monster fuqqer#monster kink#monster love#monster lover#monster romance#monster smut#monster x you#monsterfucker#monsterfucking nsft#werewolf#werewolf x reader#werewolf x you#werewolf x human
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Constant Companions Closeup #3: ROT FOR CLOUT
youtube
(also on bandcamp and spotify!)
WHAT'S going on guys, welcome back to another Constant Companions Closeup, the show where we take a DEEP DIVE into what makes these tunes tick! Last episode, we went aaaaaall the way there on Not Quite There, and today, we're making that liggity-line go up up up up up with ROT FOR CLOUT featuring VISUALEYES!! Before we get started, remember to SMASH that like button, SLAM subscribe, and FUCK the bell icon. This week's community challenge: leave your credit card info in the comments! Bet you won't!
(*cough*)
---
I check my notifications way too fucking much. It's a habit I'm trying to curb, and to my credit, I am doing better lately, but being chemically predisposed to dopamine deficiencies has done a number on my ability to go five minutes without checking the funny glowing numbers on my phone. Naturally, I also very much seek more validation than I should from the opinions of strangers yadayadayada yeah that's what the song is about but none of that actually has to do with why I started writing this song in the first place.
Have you ever taken a flight with American Airlines?
This was after waking up at 4 in the morning to fly out of Houston thinking I'd be napping on a couch in Ohio by 2 pm at the latest.
I want to make one thing clear here, and that's that I made this bed for myself. Tucked the sheets in and all. You see, on the rare occasions I fly, I normally take Southwest. Southwest does not overbook flights like a lot of other airlines do, so it's a practice I am mostly unfamiliar with. So, when I received a notification on my phone promising genuinely ridiculous amounts of flight credit money in exchange for taking a slightly later flight, I thought - well, shit! That sounds nice!
This is how they trick you. I didn't really realize I'd been tricked until I was on my second flight of the day, sitting in a middle seat at the very back of the plane, heading from Dallas, a city I don't live in, to Washington, DC, a city I was not trying to get to, staring down the barrel of another flight I was destined to get on that had been delayed like two fucking hours.
I became the Joker. All I could do to remain sane was write a song about it. This is how ROT FOR CLOUT came to be.
I guess the moral of the story is this: Don't go to Ohio. And to answer your question,
Yes I am
Not really
No
---
This is a complete sidenote but I want to mention it here: I'm genuinely overjoyed at the amount of people excitedly talking about my songwriting or the intention behind my lyrics. For a long time, it really felt like lyricism was the last thing people cared about from me, while it was always the thing I wanted to take pride in the most... So genuinely, thank you everyone for caring!! Every single fire emoji people have put next to a line I've written has extended my lifespan by multiple years
There's a brief little moment where the song's chords leave the key, doing a really stereotypically jazzy 2-5 movement, and it's one of my favorite parts of the entire song. I'm not really a music theory buff or anything, and I'm certainly not formally trained, but I've always been very passionate about more complicated harmony in otherwise poppy and accessible contexts - bo en's album pale machine really rewrote my brain when I first heard it.
On that note, there are microtones in the vocal melody - During the chorus, some of the rapidly repeated words move up in quarter tones! Possibly the simplest way I could've included microtonality, but I'm genuinely afraid if I learn more than what I already know about it I'll be lost to the darkness.
Obviously, the work of Sasuke Haraguchi was a massive influence on this song, particularly the song Igaku. I think basically everyone on the entire planet has picked up on that at this point, but I do also wanna point out some other songs that were on my mind at the time! (two for three on these posts mentioning louis cole now)
I'd also like to take a moment to spotlight the vocal samples on this! They previously appeared on ă¨ăăăŁăźăăł!, and they've honestly become some of my favorite samples to throw in things. They're also just a fucking goldmine sincerely
Finally, HUGE thanks to Visualeyes for the delightful synth solo on this!! I had put out a call on Twitter looking for instrumentalists, genuinely originally envisioning a super jazzy piano solo, but their synth playing genuinely brought the whole song together perfectly!
That's about it for this song - though again, if there are any more questions people have, I'd be happy to answer them in the replies to this post or elsewhere!! (*ahem*) THAT'S gonna do it for today's video, folks! Feel free to leave a like, comment, hit the subscribe button for more and click the bell so you don't miss any new videos. Tomorrow? I Wish That I Could Fall. it hurts.
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Hello again! I recently added subs to the dmmd stage plays (except Ren's! i do not take credit for that). Originally i only had 4 routes, but I received Mink's and ViTri's routes and just finished subbing! (thank you @minkiemoo for sending them to me!!)
They're all updated on the same Google drive that i posted before but I'll repost it here
I hope you all enjoy!! please let me know if I missed anything or if it's not working (I didn't finish subbing the post credit conversations but i wanted to get the rest of the play out there first)
translators notes and general thoughts below if u care
Woo!!!! I'm so happy i got to watch all the routes and I'm very happy to make it easier to consume for English speakers! the game blew up in 2014 on tumblr from a fan translation iirc? so I think it's only fair that I do my part now that I'm at a level of fluency where I can do that too! my goal since i was a kid to be able to watch/play things in jp without subs or translation, and i think i only recently realized i can do that now lol
it has been a very long time since I started learning jpn (i believe in total it has been 18 years on and off đ god) and i just wasn't confident in my skills but when i was watching Ren's route (it was the only one available overseas without vpn shit and had subs) and no shade to whoever had to sub Ren's route but i noticed some subs were just straight up wrong? (there's a part where aoba is looking at a screen at toue's speech and it was just all wrong) so i think that coupled with having friends that also like dmmd and wanted to watch the other routes inspired me to do my own damn subs lmao đ
I'm absolutely not saying my subs are perfect, I'm sure there are spots that aren't 100% accurate (mostly because i can't 100% hear exactly what syllables they're saying sometimes because they talk so fast or just the audio quality or mumbling lol noiz I'm looking at you), but if i was unsure at any point I'd cross check the game lol if anyone notices any point where my subs are inaccurate, please let me know! i take no offense and honestly would love to be corrected so i can know for the future
also lastly, i did wanna touch on my strategy for subbing! jpn and English don't translate very well to each other all the time so there are some things that are said in jp that if i wrote literally in English would feel awkward or be hard to understand, so for some dialogue i tried to convey what they were saying with phrases that would make more sense to an English reader. So if you hear some sentences/words and you're like, wait that's not 100% exactly what they said, there's a good chance I know and i made the choice to translate it differently. it can be really hard to know when to leave something literally translated and when to localize it, or how far you should change the wording even if you keep the important information in a sentence, and which words i can leave out because of how fast they talkđ
jpn is also a very context heavy language, which means they leave out words in a sentence because it's implied that they're still in the sentence but you're supposed to fill them in. so there are many times where it sounds like in jp, they say 2 words, but it could really actually be like 6 because they're assuming you filled in the other 4 words. English you can only really get away with so much not said, and it can feel a bit weird when u read 6 words on the screen but hear the actors say 2 words lmao but just trust me on this, i promise I'm not adding words outta no wheređ
one example: when Mizuki is holding a knife to Tae, he says ĺžćăăăŞă which literally means "don't regret this", but with the full context he's saying something close to "don't regret this because it's gonna be your fault your grandma dies" which obviously is a lot more than what he said and I can't write all that on the screen for 2 seconds. The best equivalent to this (imo) was too write "You'll regret this", because even though it's not what he said in jp, it still gets the point across to english speakers and eng speakers can fill in the blank that he'll regret this because he didn't take Mizuki's threats seriously. It's less words and it's easier to digest in the few seconds that you have to read the sub
anyway i just want it to be known that i put a lot of care into these subs and thought very hard about how I translated each sentence, so i hope that you can trust my work!
Thank you again for all the kind words! I hope you enjoy the plays!!
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----------------SPOILERS FOR ARCANE SEASON 2 ACT I BELOW----------------
Alright then, hopefully no one who hasn't watched Arcane S2 Act I yet is reading this. I don't know if this has already been said or not but I was (like so many others) blown away by Act I last Saturday and literally cannot wait for the next two. Full disclosure in case I get any facts wrong (feel free to correct me!!), I have never played League of Legends in my life and know no lore whatsoever outside the show.
I'm fascinated by Isha and Jinx's currently nonexistent but gradually growing relationship. First of all, if I remember correctly, we know that this child's name is Isha only because of a subtitleâshe never introduces herself, and no one ever calls her by name. Jinx only acknowledges her grudgingly, and until the very last scene of Episode 3, Sevika acts like she isn't even there.
I think there's parallels to be drawn between Powder and Isha, starting with what I mentionedâboth of them are often ignored by the people around them. Of course, Powder was loved by her sister and adoptive siblings and father, most of them just rarely got the chance to really show it. I don't think Sevika or Jinx particularly care about Isha at all as of now, but we don't know much about her past. There's got to be some reason why Chross's men were chasing her, and there's got to be a reason why she apparently has nowhere to go. I would guess she's associated with either Chross, another chembaron, or perhaps a figure like Vanderârelevant to the Lanes, but not a chembaron. I would also guess that, like Powder, whatever familial figure she has/had is either dead or has abandoned her.
She's small (although we do not know exactly how old she's supposed to be), does not appear to have much fighting ability, was scared the first time she saw Jinx kill people, and, despite it all, seems to be unnaturally resilient. From the little I've seen, she seems to be good at hiding and sneaking around. These are more traits that seem similar to Powder's. I'd like to add that her flinching when Jinx fired at Chross's men does not necessarily mean she's never seen violence before, but that she's probably never been in the direct line of it. I also think she has some emotional attachment to her hat. That could just be because it's useful, though.
The larger case I want to bring to light, however, is not her resemblance to Powderâbut how she differs. There's two scenes where I think this really stands out.
The first is the Jinx and Sevika vs Smeech fight. The setting of the fight bears some similarity to the fight Vi, Claggor, and Mylo get into against some thugs at the beginning of Season 1. Obviously, Jinx and Sevika are much more experienced than the kids were at the time of their fight, but they're also fighting against equally powered opponents. Regardless, the two fights bear a resemblance in where they take placeâthe streets. Powder is present in one fight mostly because she goes where Vi goes; Isha is at the other because she was following Jinx. Powder, in an act of self-defense, tries to use the bomb she made, which backfires and results in her losing the loot and, in a way, nullifying the others' victory. Isha, in an attempt to help Jinx, throws the bomb that Jinx madeâsuccessfully distracting the thug, and allowing Jinx an easy kill.
The second instance is the Jinx and Sevika vs Vi and Caitlyn fight. There's no obvious similarity here, but I think, especially from Isha/Powder's perspective, this is a very similar situation to the fight Vi and everyone gets into against Silco's gang in the warehouse at the end of S1 Act I. Assuming Isha has very little context (just like Powder did, at the time), to her, it's a very big, very scary fight of the people who are "with" herâthe good guysâvs the people attacking themâthe bad guys. Powder, in an act of bravery, tries to intervene with a device she knows nothing about other than the fact that it explodesâand it does explode, and ultimately kills most of the people she was trying to save. Isha, in an act of bravery, tries to intervene with a gun, something she has presumably never held before, to save Jinx's lifeâand she succeeds. Another interesting detail is that in Powder's case, Silco's gang, armed with Shimmer, was blatantly and dangerously overpoweredâPowder brought in the Hextech, which in theory, evened the odds, or even tipped them in their favorâbut still cost them the fight. The fight Isha was witnessing was fairly evenly matchedâVi and Caitlyn had more Hextech weapons, but Jinx did have one Hextech weapon, and she and Sevika had the advantage of it being on their turf. Isha intervened with a simple gun, arguably the weakest weapon on the scene, but still succeeded. Lastly, Powder's intervention was from a distance, while Isha threw herself into the action. It should go without saying that I'm not trying to put Powder and Isha against each other at allâI'm just observing the situations they got put into.
To address the elephant in the roomâI am aware that Powder and Jinx are the same person, but I'm drawing a distinction here because I'm examining the similarities between Powder (young Jinx, if you will) and Isha, wondering how Jinx would perceive them (if she perceives them at all), and how that would impact her relationship with her. I have no predictions as to what that may be, but I do expect Jinx and Isha's relationship to be an interesting one, and potentially, Isha may even play an important role in changing Jinx.
One last thing, although this is unrelated to the parallelsâI mentioned earlier that Sevika acts like Isha doesn't exist until the very end of Episode 3. When Isha throws herself on Jinx, Caitlyn continues attempting to fire, and Vi attempts to stop her, I believe Sevika triggers the blast, ending that altercation, largely to save Isha. When she realizes that Caitlyn won't back away, she does the best thing she can to put a stop to the situation right there.
I could draw this even further into a Vander-Vi-Powder hold parallels to Sevika-Jinx-Isha theory, but that may be a stretch, even for me.
#arcane#arcane s2#arcane season 2#league of legends#jinx#jinx arcane#powder#powder arcane#vi arcane#isha arcane#jinx and isha#vander arcane#caitlyn arcane#arcane theory#arcane thoughts#arcane act 1
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WANDAVISION DEEP DIVE part 1
(Wandavision entries: [1][2][3])
(AAA entries: ep1 [1][2][3][4])
After managing to keep away from social media for almost two months, here comes Agatha All Along sucking me back in đ I want to rewatch the whole thing and see how many details I can catch, but I guess I might as well go through Agatha's scenes in Wandavision first. and you guys are coming with me!! we can all hyperfixate together (spoilers from both WV and AAA below. this is going to be just a stream of consciousness as I go through scenes, don't expect anything elaborate)
SO.
Agatha arrives in Westview attracted by Wanda's Hex. She might already suspect she's dealing with the Scarlet Witch because lbr, who has that sort of power? She takes a calculated risk to come investigate (detective Agnes of Westview on the case!) It's funny that her calculated risks are always way more emotional than she'd admit, because who in their right mind comes after the SW? But all that power is too alluring, so Agatha takes possession of Ralph's house, ruins the market value adding a creepy basement and brainwashes him into being her husband/minion/pet.
And now it's time to do what she does best, con artist is gonna con! I adore that Agatha became one of the most infamous witches in history thanks mostly to her improv skills.
She's a magical gal is a small time locale!! he's a husband who's part machiiiiiine (great now it'll get stuck in my head again)
worth nothing that both witches and androids have historically and culturally been used as queer allegories, and here's a very sapphic witch pretending to be a straight 1950s housewife and another witch who's got an elaborate fantasy going on where her husband is able to pass and all their problems are sitcom-level fixable.
How to solve the Hex mystery according to Agatha Harkness:
step #1, casually fish for personal info
step #2, flirt with your suspect (obviously)
she literally asks if Wanda's single ÂŻ\_(ă)_/ÂŻ
AGATHA
she's lying it on soooo thick
she dropped that pot so deliberately LMAOO stinky chaotic goblin
knowing she' s being an asshole on purpose makes this scene 100 times funnier tbh
(also a moment of silence for Sharon's irreparable trauma. her last words will be "Wanda, I'm begging you, let him breathe, please")
episode 2: Agatha keeps being a menace
And knowing now that she's always playing a part and her real personality is much more emo makes it easier to spot when she slips out of character
"was that too much? might rein it down a lil bit" (btw I'm still suspicious of Dennis the mailman and totally expect a big reveal in Westview season 3)
I'm betting that this was Agatha rather than Agnes too. she's so miserable lol. she hates playing this part so much. and that wig is hideous
not Agatha casually planting the idea of children in Wanda's head. She probably was the one making people chant "for the children" too. literally manipulating Wanda into showing her if she can create life, calculated risk my ass, she's out here playing with fire
(does that mean that Agatha is a liiiiiiitle bit Billy's and Tommy's parent too?? she planTED the sEED. hear me OUT.)
you know she was dead inside at having to sit through the whole talent show. she probably took it out on the contestants and made them trip onstage or something
Episode 3 of pappappa pappappa wandavision!
Agatha helping Wanda to pick baby clothes, I'm going to sob. (look at this technicolor filter! modern shows CAN color their shit! it's just that they'd rather make everything look like muddy ass instead)
not much from Agatha this episode except scheming to get Monica kicked out of the Hex, seeing as she's the biggest obstacle between herself and Wanda ('s powers). Also you know she was stalking the house to keep track of when the babies were born. Also also, the painted scenery! Like mother like son, it's such a big hint about the nature of the Road.
look at this piece of shit, I love her so much. And she does tend to wink when she's just told a truly egregious lie, doesn't she? it's like her little signature.
Agatha in episode 5 coming in like: LEMME SEE THOSE BABIESSSSSSS
kathryn hahn with 80s curls is doing something to me, let me tell you
so manipulative, in so many ways. and knowing what we know now about Agatha and children, imagine the turmoil inside of her!! triumph at having confirmation of Wanda's life-giving powers. nervousness about the mess she's putting herself in. exasperation at having to keep up the charade. and, most importantly, getting to HOLD A BABY BOY AFTER ALL THIS TIME (amazing, terrifying, traumatic, wonderful)
what is she doiiiing. this bitch, I swear.
OH MY GAWD I FORGOT WANDA SAID THIS. "so she keeps coming at me like a cat in heat, that's not her fault Vision, she has a Medical Condition"
"kids. can't control them. no matter how hard you try"??????? the suddenly wistful voice?????????????????????? why don't I fling myself off a cliff?????????????????? was this woman actually honestly dying inside while still having to play pretend, I can't, I cannot. And how much of Agatha's backstory was decided at this point, was Kathryn given a general idea?
Agatha and Billy, partners in crime already! Seriously, Jac Schaeffer must have had an idea of where this was going. And it's obvious in retrospect that Agatha would be drawn to Billy the most, he's a witch unlike Tommy and he's such a polite, sweet little fellow, he probably reminded her of Nicky so much?? Here's this scary dangerous witch who on one side is planning to murder everyone in the room, and on the other is fighting back the urge to go full mama bear on this kid and protect and cherish him forever. This is not what she signed up for when she decided to stalk Wanda!
She is so horrible. She is despicable. I'm allowed to say it because I love her so much! I can't remember, was it revealed that she turned a fly into a dog or something? Or did she kidnap a dog dog from a shelter / someone's garden and then stone cold killed him? No, wait, she made Ralph kill him. Do your own killing of cute innocent little creatures, you coward! Love that vest tho.
"Fix the dead!" "You can do that?" And of course she's pretending here but you know that's EXACTLY what this whole sordid Sparky affair was about, she's testing and prodding at Wanda's powers, trying to figure out her limits. There's an eagerness here that she doesn't need to fake. Who knows, maybe she was actually squeamish about killing the dog (she does have a cuddly bunny and woves him vewy much), hence why Ralph had to do it. But more importantly even if she didn't like killing a pet, even if she wasn't happy about traumatizing these kids - that's exactly what she's doing here, she's willingly hurting two children - she went and did it anyway, because her thirst for Wanda's powers is too big. She kills witches out of anger, out of fear and self-preservation. She is ultimately a selfish person, and that is what makes her a villain. It's not that she doesn't have feelings. She has plenty of feelings, she has a conscience, and she chooses to do the bad thing anyway.
"And we can't reverse death. No matter how sad it makes us. Okay? Some things are forever." These two shows above all else are about grief. You can peel this scene and find more and more layers, it was about the kids losing Sparky at first but also about Wanda losing Pietro, Wanda losing Vision, Wanda losing the kids. And it's also, DEFINITELY about Agatha losing Nicky. I need a drink.
Agatha discreetly wiping a tear in the background nbd
And I can only upload 30 pictures per post so there's going to be a part two. I was NOT planning to write so much, help. What are you doing to me AGATHA
go to part 2
#Wandavision#Agatha All Along#screenshots#character study#Agatha Harkness#Wanda Maximoff#Kathryn Hahn#agatha deep dive
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Warhammer - Tarik Torgaddon NSFW
feel like pure shit just want him back x
A = Aftercare (what theyâre like after sex): always keeps some point of contact with you if you aren't straight up cuddling, his head on your lap or his hand on your back as you sleep on your front etc etc he is always touching you. if you need something he'll do it, but you definitely have to ask him several times to actually convince him to get up.
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partnerâs): he loves your voice, everything else too obviously, he'll rush to tell you, but there is something about the way you speak, the way you use his name, the way you laugh or yell or moan or whimper. he doesn't like it when you stay silent during the deed, he is loud therefore you have to be louder. if he isn't getting concerned looks after he leaves your room when you two are done, he knows he hasn't done his job right.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically): he is filthy, he likes the mess, he likes to let it get everywhere, on your body, on his body, on your face, in your mouth, on the floor, he is not ashamed about it, the messier the better, he loves fucking your thighs for this reason as well.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs): is it a secret if he has joked about it? probably not. he absolutely has thought about sharing you with loken. he'll ask you first, ask how you feel about loken making you almost worried that you overstepped perhaps by ogling his battle brother that one time or something, he asks for you to be honest with him, his expression grim and then just as you are about to apologise, he'll grin, immediately telling you to relax and that he was just curious. he'll start bringing loken up while he fucks you, asking what you'd do or what you think his reactions would be like, almost getting off to the idea of loken as much as the idea of you with him.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what theyâre doing?): not as much as he is pretending he has, at the end of the day he is part of the mournival, his work within the legion takes priority above all else. and even so ,if you pry and ask what type of experience he has it's all mostly one sided, letting someone use his mouth or using his hands on someone else, more often than not choosing a quickie that just didn't work out for him, considering size and prep required.
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying): he likes to have you ride him, he sits back to enjoy the show, his big hands on your hips urging you to grind down against him every time he bottoms out, he'll also fuck your thighs this way, have you hold on as he pushes your legs together just to bounce you up and down on his lap.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.): he loves to joke around with you, you bet your ass he has tried telling you that damned bear story mid thrust.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.): he keeps it natural because there isn't much there to begin with, it's all very soft and the same brown of his hair.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect): even if he is more laid back than his brothers he is still equally as emotionally stunted as them, he just does a good job of hiding it all behind teasing smiles and jokes, but he has his moments, when he's been gone for a long time, when something is troubling him, when a mission went wrong etc. he's holding you a bit tighter, mumbling things into your hair as he pins your down, urging you to hold him as well, he won't tell you what is bothering him, so he hopes this makes up for it. hopes this is enough for you to understand.
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon): be puts on a show, slowly spreading his thighs, leaning back on the bed, uses both hands, one to cup his balls or run up and down his toned body, the other working on his cock, his hold loose enough that you know for a fact he isn't really getting off to it, it's mostly done to goad you into action, throwing his head back moaning loudly. once he figures out he can have a warm body to satisfy his needs he finds jacking off so boring and pointless, he'll do it just to tease you or if you ask him to.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks): threesomes, oral fixation, cum/spitplay etc
L = Location (favorite places to do the do): if he knows he can get away with it, and trust that he will, he'll try just about anywhere. he finds he really enjoys places where there is the possibility of getting caught by another astartes, not so much by serfs, or other baseline humans.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going): he is totally the, you look so hot when you are angry guy and it's something you sadly have to deal with.
N = No (something they wouldnât do, turn offs): there isn't much out there he would be against at least trying once, especially if he sees they get a rise out of you, he is very very giving.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.): ride his face, he doesn't even need to get out of his armor for this. set your own pace and don't hold back. if he thinks you are going easy on him he'll grab you to grind you on his face himself.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.): fast, he isnt rough, but he is overwhelming and relentless, once he finds what spot that makes you tick he is on it with a fervor that makes you shake, he'll have you scrambling for purchase on the sheets and trying to both push off and pull his hands on you, in seconds.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.): he knows they aren't convenient for multiple reasons, but he tries ,he really tries to sneak them in every so often, it's almost like a game to him. it's enough if you get off, your back against the wall, one leg thrown over his shoulder, on his knees in his armor bent awkwardly to take you in his mouth before he has to leave for a mission, it's difficult to deny him when he makes such a convincing argument.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.): he is game for almost everything, it's almost a test, he wants to see what you are capable of throwing at him and what he can handle.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?): he has the energy to go for a long long time but he prefers to keep your meet ups short (for him) and sweet, he claims it's to make sure you don't get tired of him and bed someone else while he is gone, you aren't sure if he is joking or not.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?): not a fan of them, it comes with that space marine pride that gets oh so easily wounded at the idea of not being enough, which is frankly an insane thought.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease): a big fucking tease and unrelenting at that, he'll deny you your release a million times and still remain simply unmovable and amused at your squirming, he'll keep going until you are begging or yelling at him. he'll take either option.
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.): he talks, from filthy comments about how well you are taking him, how he is probably ruining you for any other baseline man, to fuelling your shared fantasies, to simply bringing up a story so he can watch you grow frustrated and try to struggle against him, this man does not shut up, but he loves to have you shut him up, put your hands over his mouth, pull him in for a kiss, anything like that and he throbs inside of you.
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character): he is definitely the one to go for if you are interested in exploring some different power dynamics with a very large very strong man. he might make fun of you at first, how many people would love to be ravaged by the strong and heroic astartes and yet you are here asking him to kneel and beg for you...he will definitely think about it and when he agrees, boy does he beg prettily, he seemingly gets off to his own submission more than you do.
X = X-ray (letâs see whatâs going on under those clothes): long and it curves up towards his stomach a bit, paler than the rest of him, more of a shower rather than a grower.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?): he is not as direct as his brothers surprisingly enough, he teases you from the get go, the second you have his attention he is flirting and joking around with you and you are never quite sure if he means it or not. he actually wants to be the one to be approached by you and that little dynamic stays even as your relationship progresses. he wants you to be the one to seek him out most of the time. it really strokes his ego.
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards): he has no qualms about falling asleep before you, he only has a few hours to properly rest, he'll enjoy them to their fullest even if you are next to him still wide awake. he is very clingy too, get's genuinely irritated with you if you move away while he is asleep.
#tarik#tarik torgaddon#tarik smut#torgaddon smut#torgaddon x reader#tarik torgaddon smut#mournival#mournival smut#warhammer 40k x reader#warhammer 40k#warhammer smut#warhammer 40k smut#space marine smut#space marine x reader#.writing#luna wolves#luna wolves x reader#luna wolves smut
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sending <3 to my grandparents and getting âtf is a greater than 3â
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He needs so much attention, all the time (Patreon)
#Doodles#Wander Over Yonder#Commander Peepers#Lord Hater#Wander#Death Glare#Wandering Eye#Those first two made me start a whole new page just to get them out of my head and then a bunch more followed lol#Early Death Glare maybe? First coming to terms with his massive crush? Just an average day of being Commander Peepers? Who's to say lol#The idea of him vibrating out of his skin trying to not act weird around Hater is very funny to me haha#How do act normal around the guy you like when it's just you two but in a professional setting?? Training didn't cover this#Meanwhile Hater is oblivious obviously haha#They have to be mismatched - one has to be like ''Oh grop I love him so much but can never tell him'' at a time for the max comedy of errors#Peepers is so small I can't get over it lol#And then a little Wandering Eye for the road <3 He can't be emotionally open so much of the time!#Anger is about it and even then it mostly manifests as frustration - he sublimates it into work as much as he can#Anger is hit or miss depending on what Hater's willing to put up with too ahh#Give this man a therapy session and a box of tissues pls#Is it because it's fun to draw his whole head/face crying? Shhhh that's irrelevant (it's not) lol#Wander always has a hug ready for whoever needs it <3#Sweet lad#Both of their feet are really fun to draw too haha - Peepers' are like plush and pillowy#While Wander's are so stretchy and squishy and silly haha they're fun to pose!#Been so happy with the points of contact lately as well ah ⪠Knees and ball of the feet touching the ground! Yes!
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Oh god what now?
I watched this HORRIBLE video (all the tws, plus it's the daily mail sorry I didn't even realize that was the op until just now so actually fuck it I'm not linking; it's details of the time leading up to Liam's death and a person being gross and insensitive about it, will describe below, skip the rest if you don't want to be as upset as I now am)... ...showing an American who was also a guest at the hotel saying that Liam was in the lobby of the hotel multiple times in the time leading up to his death causing a scene and they just kept escorting him back up to his room. They show pictures the guest took of him while all this was happening, including one from something that happened according to this man just before he died, which is that he was in the lobby looking at his laptop and passed out and was convulsing (he took a fucking picture of him passed out) and they woke him up and took him upstairs and put him in the room alone again; that's when they called the police but 5 minutes later he was dead.
#I am also hit hard by zayn's cancellation#obviously its for the best and I want very much for him to take care and for this to go so well for him and feel safe and comfortable#but I was going to see him wed#I was really excited#it was something to look forward to in a dark time#plus I was thinking about Liam and about being in that space with a couple thousand other people mostly also feeling sad#again I AM GLAD FOR ZAYN and it's clearly the right call#but I can't help feeling pretty fucking sad about it#and like... well I felt sure the first show of tour would happen at least plus it was the FIRST SHOW#a whole leg more than a month after the first? we'll see I guess#ugh sorry this is all so trivial in face of everything but yk. it's all just a lot piled up#cw Liam details
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how are you feeling today? did you make it through unscathed?
Yeah I definitely didn't đ I've been hella congested all day and I definitely have a cough, but it's more bc my throat is bugging me than anything. I don't think I technically have a fever, my temp's just slightly elevated from where it normally is. It's fucking miserable bc I can't breathe through my nose and the damn thing fucking hurts, and I'm kinda uncomfortable and a little achy, but other than that I'm mostly just tired and a little hazy and generally just don't feel great, so I'm not dying like my partner was lmao. But yeah, all this to say that I'm fucking pissed at him and I literally feel like a goddamn plague rat đđ
#not snz#i fucking hate it here#I've sneezed a few times but not much#mainly just coughing#super sniffly tho#also i did go hang out with him just so i could bitch at him lmao#also i feel fucking disgusting and i was sad being in my room#like i don't want anyone to perceive me#like i was almost never sick when i was younger and if i was no i wasn't unless it was bad#but times have changed đ#so no more going out and doing things while being either maybe or definitely sick đ#thank god honestly but i still don't want people to Know#like don't fucking look at me let me rot in my hole and die alone#but i didn't wanna be alone apparently like i was very sad about the thought for some reason smh#so yeah we literally just hung out in the car#lowered the seats and had blankets and pillows and shit so it was kinda chill#and he bought food from a couple different places bc it's his fucking fault and he's trying to buy my forgiveness lmao#various soups and mac and cheeses and the general concensus was that they'd probably be good if we could taste them better đ#some of them tho the texture was just not it like even a great taste couldn't save them imo#also there's a boba place that makes hot teas also so we went there a few times#ordered in advance masks on obviously so we were only in there for like a minute just to grab everything#like we were being as careful as we could#also he's like mostly feeling better like his fever broke apparently#he still sounds fucking gross tho lmao like his voice is shot and he still has a pretty bad cough#and now I'm like fucking whatever we both have the same gross ass fucking disease so it's fine i guess#but i still kept glaring at him as a first reaction whenever he decided to be symptomatic lmao#but i wasn't pressing myself against the window trying to escape so progress lmaoooo#anyway it was a chill day i guess like we were just hanging and making sure the other person wasn't dying lmao#I'm at home now and took a hot ass shower and my eyes hurt and I'm tired so it's probably bedtime lmao
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the states dont have crate day how am i supposed to explain what kind of guy wiremu is when u dont understand what it means to be a Crate Day Guy
#its the first saturday of december (first saturday of summer in nz) and u buy a crate of beer#(24x 750ml bottles) and u have from noon until midnight to finish them (2 bottles an hour)#it is a Nightmare of a time bc people obviously get way too drunk and a Lot of people can not drink that much#in general let alone in the time limit#so mostly people will share crates or at least my friends tend to#but like. there are the kind of guys who are always Pumped for crate day and go super hard and i think wiremus like that#hes a very. hes a casual beer drinker in the way a Lot of people in nz are (read: borderline alcoholics)#but hes a bigger guy w a high tolerance so he very rarely gets hammered#wiremu: headcanons.
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Upon further examination, I am leaning more and more into Otto being a nonbinary egg opposed to a nonbinary person who uses he/him pronouns. Thanks for the help Mi-ma <3
#rat rambles#oni posting#she reffers to them as 'that nice young man' in one of her journal entries which is what tipped the scale for me#like its obviously possible that granny assumed incorrectly but given how much otto likes her Im inclined to believe shed know if they#were openly nonbinary especially given how personal otto has been with her already#but rly its mostly that combined with the other big thing that makes me feel that they probably were an egg at the time#so I shallst continue to use they/them for otto unless I find a new log that explicitly confirms their preffered pronouns#nothing short of otto saying out loud yeah Im not a man but I still wanna go by the same stuff will fully convince me#bonus points if they talk abt it with dr.holland so that he can make his gender identity clear too#also to be clear there are no mi-ma transphobia allegations to be found here I just think she doesnt know#she has so fucking many nonbinary coworkers and at least one of them is also on the older end and has been at the company for a while#plus I doubt theyre putting transphobia in the colony survival game like imagine if dont starve characters called eachother slurs#so no mi-ma slander shall be tollerated also she is trans (2 Me)#shes literally named mi-ma you cannot convince me she is cis#she is such a silly billy I wish so bad that she showed up in more logs#maybe even given an official full name drop to clear up any doubts#given her whole character is being old and mi-ma's whole thing is being the old one its like 99%#but technically speaking we never do get a full name just last name and first initial#so very technically speaking she could be one of the other 3 available m named guys but its highly unlikely#as in the other options are meep max and marie and no way in hell it's any of them#theyre all young chaps and theres only one hashtag woman in their ranks along with a nonbinary person and a hashtag man#so basically yeah its mi-ma there's no way in hell its not mi-ma
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both times i've written a film essay i've gone about it in such a terrible terrible way like i 100% know how i should be doing this and i know that i should be putting more time and care into it but i just have not . anyway i'm hoping that next semester i can get my shit together with it a bit more because i would actually like to do as well as i can.....
#does not help that i got an unexpectedly good grade for my first film essay#like . it was very very surprising i was so happy about it and i DID work hard on that essay but i didn't go about it in the way#i know that i could have done to have it be like . as good as i could write an essay like that ykwim ?#i put effort in obviously but i could have gone about it much much better#and this time around i've completely just . fucked it i think .#in fairness i have been with my family................ but many many people do actually do uni while living at home idk how but they do#mostly now though i just need it to be done
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think my queue ran out a while ago and itll be you know, five years before i fill it up again. so it was nice knowing you all
#taylor.txt#im obviously exaggerating but yeah im very busy sorry#hopefully gonna post a few fics for whumptober i just need toâŚwrite them. with what time i dont know#but im trying light therapy for the first time ever and im on day 2 now and already didnt come home and immediately fall asleep so? feeling#hopeful about the outcome of that! seasonal depression has been rough on me pretty much my whole life and it was in a sense bearable when i#had regular flavour depression on top of that (also for most of my life but last year i discontinued medication and have been mostly fine)#so last year it kinda hit different and im hoping this year it wont really hit at all aside from how much it already has#but weâre nowhere near sunset at 4pm yet so like. yeah. anyway that was a tangent#what was the point of saying all this? oh yeah. I HAVE BIG IDEAS FOR FICSâŚjust need TIME to write them#weekly assignments and quizzes in all 5 of my classes has been killing me especially since the assignments are like. hard. lol
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born in the 90s forever
#when someone (a student) told me they were born in 2004 last week i had a realisation. like.#we live(d) different lives.#i mean just the fact that they were still in school when the pandemic started!!#and that alone will have a lasting impact#or how at the polling station on sunday there were voters born in fucking 2006#idc about attaching generational labels to people but digitalisation and how we use the internet etc etc makes such a difference#mostly in an increasingly negative way. and has obsviously changed so much.#also thinking of that whole childhood experience#i might have been born in the late 90s but i am so glad to have had a childhood without THAT as well#only occasionally getting access to a computer and owning one for the first time in my teens (the same applies to a smartphone)#i've experienced a lot from the 90s through my brother and half brother who was born in the 80s#(until i was seven we were living in the same house together)#so i got a lot of nostalgia for physical objects and such that no longer exist#most of all for a time that will never be again#<3#oh and my parents are older generations so that would also have some effects#it can feel lonely sometimes to not relate to those supposedly in your age group... all my life i have looked up to older people#this is obviously very individual#just very grateful to have had that kind of life in spite of all the bad bits#personal
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