#fic: you don’t get to tell me about sad
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sogoodtoheritsvicious · 3 days ago
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broke the sweetest promise (that you never should have made)
summary: your relationship with lando ends before it can ever really begin
parings: lando norris x ex!reader x harry styles
vicious speaks: this was supposed to be a cute little fic after i was inspired when listening to ‘electric touch’, and now it’s taken on a life of its own! i hope you enjoy this new mini series 💕 i had to make lando the bad guy, i’m sorry 😭 this is just setting the stage so there’s not a lot of harry but don’t worry, he’s in the next part!!
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lando we’re so golden ☀️
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yourusername we’re saurrr cute 💛
⤷ lando you definitely are 💛
⤷ fan1 can you put us all out of our misery and DATE ALREADY
⤷ fan2 fr!! yn’s looked like she’s been in love with lando for years and he’s been looking the same way lately 🥹
oscarpiastri two pretty best friends
⤷ yourusername missing our 3rd 😔💔
⤷ fan3 lmao oscar saw the shipping comments and said NOT on my watch 😭
⤷ oscarpiastri she can do better
⤷ lando SLOW DOWN SLOW DOWN
⤷ fan5 oscar PLEASE 😭
⤷ fan6 i fear osc isn’t joking
alexandrasaintmleux yourusername give me your hand in marriage NOW 💍💍 i’m SERIOUS
⤷ yourusername i’m all yours baby 😚
⤷ charles_leclerc i’m literally right here?
⤷ alexandrasaintmleux and?
⤷ yourusername is that supposed to mean something to us?
⤷ charles_leclerc damn okay
⤷ fan7 you got humbled so quick dkgjfjs
fan8 harry in the likes, what the hell 😭
⤷ fan9 maybe he’s an f1 fan
⤷ fan10 ooh i hope we’ll see him at a race!!
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fan1 IS MY LIFE A JOKE TO YOU
fan2 you’re crazy if you think we believe you’re just friends after this
maxverstappen1 oh my God did it finally happen?
fan3 this is basically a hard launch, right?
oscarpiastri you already know how i feel so i’ll just say that if you’re happy, i’m happy ❤️
fan4 you won’t last long, lando will get bored eventually 🤷‍♀️
yourbff bitch you have some explaining to do
fan5 omg are we about to get love songs for the first time?
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69,654 likes
tmz f1 driver lando norris and singer yn were seen in a pretty heated fight at a studio earlier tonight! apparently lando left her alone in tears. for those who don’t know, he and the singer have been best friends for a few years now, with fans recently speculating online about a relationship confirmation coming soon from the pair but those dreams were crushed when lando was spotted kissing a mystery woman on valentine’s day (see last slide).
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fan1 omg he’s such a WHORE
fan2 YN STANS WE RIDE AT DAWN 🤺
fan3 this is so sad, man. you can tell yn loves him and i thought lando loved her but clearly that isn’t true. she deserves so much better!!
fan4 leaving her alone in tears is such an evil move…lando norris you shall die by my sword
fan5 it was clear lando wasn’t ever going to see her as a serious option. she did this to herself!!
⤷ fan6 yn didn’t do anything to herself, lando is the one who keeps stringing her along, especially lately.
fan7 our girl needs to cut lando off, take time to heal and when she’s ready, move on with someone who actually loves her.
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fan1 damn tell us how you really feel 😭
fan2 this isn’t the confirmation post i wanted but i guess i’ll take it 🤷‍♀️
fan3 the fucking shade 😭😭
yourbff GET HIS ASS!
fan4 leave lando alone you weirdo
maxverstappen1 this is more information about lando than i ever wanted to know but i can appreciate what you’re doing it for
fan5 me when i lie
fan6 this is diabolical
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itsaria has added to their stories
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fan1 oh girl this is not it
fan2 this isn’t the serve you think it is
fan3 there’s still time to delete this
fan4 wow you really feel no shame in homewrecking
lando ❤️
⤷ itsaria you need to set the record straight about yn. people are in my dms calling me a homewrecker and i didn’t sign up for that shit, lando.
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yourusername i never wanted to bring this to social media but i was made aware that lando released a statement today that as you can see from above, is full of nothing but lies. we’ve been best friends for a few years now and i had been in love with him for almost all of them. we recently admitted our feelings for each other and decided to see where things would go between us. it was new, but we were relationship and he did cheat on me. i don’t know who he thinks he’s fooling but i haven’t seen or spoken to him since that night at the the studio and things between us are obviously not fine. i’m also pretty sure aria had no idea about me so please do not attack her. this is the last time i’m going to speak about this situation, as i want to move on with my life.
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theynsociety still not over taylor and yns surprise performance last night!!
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fan8 i’ve missed her so much!! she was literally glowing last night 🥹🫶
fan9 the fit!! THE HAIR!!! i have a feeling we’re about to enter her best era yet
fan10 harry’s always popping up in the most random places 😭
fan11 it’s been a long month, but clearly this break is doing wonders for her 😍
fan12 harry styles yn fan confirmed?
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taglist: @pansexualdarling
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darlingdaisyfarm · 22 hours ago
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This honestly might be a downer or stupid, but I just got fired and I am having a really hard time. I just want to bury my head in Stan's chest and sob. I was wondering if you could write how the Stan and Ford might react to the reader being suddenly fired and maybe how they'd comfort them? I'm also really excited for the next chapter of your fic!
✧˚⋆ Stan & Ford supporting you when you need it most ⋆。♡˚
oh sweetheart, im so sorry ur going through this, holy shit. just the moment i received this ask, i knew i had to write smth when ill get free time today, because i feel so sorry for you. i hope these two old men gave u even a tiny bit of comfort, please be kind to urself right now, youre gonna get through this, i promise. sending u all my love !! stay strong please 🫂🫂
STANLEY
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the thing about Stan is that he gets it. he gets the feeling of being chewed up and spat out, of having doors slam in your face, of working your ass off and still being told you’re not enough. he gets the quiet humiliation, the bitterness in the back of your throat, the way your hands shake when you try to act like it doesn’t matterm
you don’t even remember how you got here. your feet must’ve carried you through the streets, past strangers whose lives weren’t just ruined, past cars honking, past buildings that still stood while the whole world inside you had collapsed.
“hey, hey. what the hell, sweetheart, breathe, alright? you’re okay, you’re right here.” his rough but worried voice reaches you when you slam mystery shack's door open, standing in the doorway with shaking hands, red-eyed.
“i got fired, Stan. j-just gone, outta nowhere. i don’t know what to do, Stan, im so lost.” your throat burns
before you can say anything else, he's opening his arms. “c'mere.” and you don't even hesitate as you crash into him like a wave, burying your face in his chest. and he holds you, one big arm wrapping around your back, the other hand coming up to cradle the back of your head
“there we go. you don’t gotta keep it all in, sweetheart.” the words hit you harder than you expect. you're so used to holding it together, to swallowing everything down, to being strong. and Stan, who’s built himself up from nothing, who’s taken every punch life threw at him and still kept standing, he’s telling you it’s okay to break.
so you do. you bury your face in his chest and cry until you’re dizzy, until your breath stutters and shakes, until all the anger and hurt and fear bleed out of you. Stanley doesn’t rush you or tell you to stop. “let it out, sweetie, s’gonna be okay.” he holds you close tightly because he’s spent his whole life holding people who needed it more than he did.
“it’s not fair,” you gasp, clutching on his clothes.
“no, it ain’t.”
“i worked so hard.”
“i know.”
“i feel like—like nothing i do is enough—”
Stan tightens his hold, pressing his chin to the top of your head. “hey. you listen to me.” his voice turns serious. “some suit in an office makin’ a crap decision got nothing to do with who you are. they're dumb. absolute morons for lettin’ you go. betcha the whole place is gonna fall apart without you because you were the best thing about that shithole. if they couldn’t see that, then screw ‘em. they lost you. not the other way around.”
you shake your head, clenching your fists. “but—“
“no buts,” he growls and then, softer: “you're not trash just ‘cause some idiots don’t know how to treat their workers. you're not worthless just ‘cause some suits decided you were expendable. you are not nothing.”
Stan pulls back to tip your chin up, making sure you’re listening. his thumb wipes a tear off your cheek. “i mean, you still got me, sweetheart. ain’t no job in the world that could change that.” he smiles genuinely at you.
you close your eyes, giving him a tiny sad smile back. you let yourself breathe, let yourself believe it, hiding your face in his chest again. Stan's grip stays strong and unshaking, shielding you from the whole world as you cry until you’re too tired, so all what you do is sob into his chest. you’re just leaning into him, exhausted, letting him hold you up.
Stan sighs, resting his cheek against your hair. “ya ever heard the story of the biggest screw-up in New Jersey?”
you sniffle. “what?”
”lemme tell ya, kid grows up in a house that don’t want him. gets kicked out. loses every job he ever had. ends up in a broken-down shack in the middle of nowhere. total loser.”
you shift against him. “Stan—“
“but he keeps goin’. and somehow, somehow, that dumbass loser ends up with people who love him. ends up holdin’ someone who needs it. ends up tellin’ the best damn person he’s ever met that they’re gonna be okay.”
he lets you lean into him again, lets you breathe him in, lets you stay as long as you need. tells you stories about all the bosses he’s scammed just to make you laugh.
at some point, when the tears have slowed and the weight in your chest isn’t crushing anymore, Stan ruffles your hair and leans back, arms crossed.
“y’know, i could use an extra set of hands around the shack.“
you blink up at him, sniffing. “what? you. . .you want me to work here?”
“yeah, id rather have someone i actually like workin’ here instead of hiring some random kid who’s just gonna rob me blind.” his usual gruff tone is back, but his gaze is what speaks louder, soft and certain, making it obvious that you belong here.
you open your mouth, but he cuts in, pointing a finger at you. “and before ya say some crap about not bein’ good enough or whatever, shut up. i’m the boss, i decide who’s good enough, and i say it’s you.”
you let out a shaky laugh, wiping your nose. “wow, such a heartfelt offer.”
he smirks. “hey, that’s as heartfelt as it gets, sweetheart. but seriously. think about it, okay? i got a spot for ya.” Stanley is not just offering a job for you, he’s offering a place, a place where you’re wanted, where you’re needed, where you don’t have to prove yourself to anyone.
you take a deep breath, feeling lighter for the first time all day. “yeah. yeah, i’ll think about it.”
“good,” Stan smiles and ruffles your hair again. “now, wanna eat somethin’? watch a dumb movie? beat me at cards? or you want me to egg their car?” about the last thing, he's joking, probably. but if you say yes, you know he’ll do it.
STANFORD
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Ford finds you sitting at the kitchen table, arms crossed on the surface, face buried in them. you haven’t moved and spoken in a while, just sat there, motionless, like a puppet with the strings cut.
he clears his throat, stepping closer. “i, ah. noticed you didn’t come in for dinner.”
you don’t respond. his brows knit together, concern creasing his forehead. he takes the seat across from you, folding his hands on the table. “would you like to talk about it?”
for a moment, nothing. then, muffled: “i got fired.” slips from your mouth. so that's what happened. Ford doesn’t say oh. doesn’t say im sorry. doesn’t say what happened? he understands you because Ford Pines knows what it is to be discarded. he knows what it is to dedicate yourself to something, only to be told you are wrong. to be shoved out, unmoored, drifting in the space between who you thought you were and who they’ve decided you are now.
he knows what it is to look down at his hands and wonder if they are still meant to build something. after being betrayed.
he frowns thoughtfully. “that was. . . rather sudden, wasn’t it?”
you nod weakly. Ford exhales through his nose, gaze sharpening, analyzing. you. your sadness. the whole situation.
“it must feel unfair.“ he doesn’t just acknowledge the loss, but the injustice of it. and it makes your throat close up.
you lift your head slightly, looking at his face. “it- it is. i tried so hard. i put so much effort into that stupid job, and now it’s just—just gone.”
Ford hums. “tell me something.” he leans forward, putting elbows on the table. “do you think your value was in the work you did?”
you blink at him, but he doesn't even let you answer. “because if that were the case, then the moment you lost that job, you would have lost all worth as a person. but that’s not true, is it?” his voice is always so calm, full of absolute certainty.
you shake your head slowly, unsurely and Ford nods, satisfied. then, after a brief pause, he stands. “wait here” you don’t have the energy to question him. you just sit, staring blankly at the tabletop, until he returns a moment later with a notebook and pen.
he places them in front of you.
you glance up, confused. “what’s this for?”
Ford takes his seat again, tapping a finger against the cover. “do me a favor, darling. write down five things about yourself that have nothing to do with your job.”
your face looks tired and skeptical. you stare at the paper. “Ford, i—“
“anything,” he says softly, smiling at you. “everything. what you love. what you’re good at. what excites you, what makes you feel something. what matters to you.”
your fingers tighten around the pen. at first, you don’t know where to start. but Ford doesn’t rush you, just patiently sits beside you.
so you write. you write about the things that make you you. and at first, it feels stupid and awkward. it starts small, your favorite books, your favorite songs, the way you love thunderstorms, the way you always make extra coffee just in case someone else wants some.
but then it gets bigger. the things you’ve created. the things you’ve learned. the times you were kind when no one was looking. the people who love you, who see you. the way you keep going, even when it’s hard
Ford watches as you write, nodding approvingly at each entry.
“now tell me: did losing your job take any of that away?”
you stare at the words. the little pieces of yourself you hadn’t even thought about in the wake of everything. softly, you shake your head
Ford’s expression gentles. “then you’re still you. and you’re still worth just as much as you were yesterday. because no job, no institution, no single event defines you.” you swallow hard. Fords voice drops lower. “you are more than what you do, more than what you produce, more than what some company decides you’re worth. you are your thoughts. your curiosity. your kindness.” he gestures to the list. “you are all of this and nothing can take that from you.”
your breath wobbles. Ford’s gaze softens further. “come here, sweetheart.“ you hesitate but only for a second, then stand and he meets you halfway, arms wrapping around you. and Ford isn’t Stanley, isn’t someone used to giving big, open, thoughtless affection. but what he lacks in ease, he makes up for in intent.
because he means this. his big hand moves up and down your back slowly. “you’re not alone in this,” he murmurs into your hair. “we’ll figure something out. and until then. . . you are still extraordinary.“ his voice is so certain, and suddenly you don’t feel quite as lost.
“th-thank you” you bury your face in his sweater, hands gripping his sleeves
“and don’t let anyone ever tell you you aren’t smart or brave or worthy enough.”
you stay there a while. until Ford gives your shoulder one last squeeze and pulls back, adjusting his glasses. “now. i assume you haven’t eaten?”
you smile at him, shaking your head. “no, wasn't in the mood.“
“come, sweetheart, let’s fix that.”
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loves0phelia · 2 days ago
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Red And Blue
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Summery: His canon event.
Words: 1.9k
Warnings: kinda gore at one point nothing too crazy, grammar mistakes.
A/N: I'm so sorry for the amount of mistakes this probably has but i cant be bothered to care more i just want to get this fic out. Listen to my tears ricochet as you read
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Rafe had always been good at hiding things. He kept his head down, stayed out of the spotlight, and made sure no one looked too closely. But ever since the bite, since the powers, since the responsibility that came with it, lying had become second nature.
Especially to you.
It killed him, really. Every time he bailed on a movie night, ignored your texts, or showed up bruised and breathless with a half-baked excuse, he saw the confused and hurt look in your eyes. But what was he supposed to do? Tell the truth? That he was ditching every time to swing across rooftops, and fight criminals? No. That wasn’t an option.
Tonight was no different.
“Are you serious, Rafe?” You leaned your head down, phone pressed against your ear, voice sharp with frustration. “You're leaving me again. You promised this time. I know you don't like school events but just once please”
“I'm sorry” he muttered, running a hand through his already-messy hair. “Something came up.”
“Something always comes up. What is it this time? And don’t tell me it's homework or family stuff, because I know when you’re lying.” 
“I just…” He exhaled, as if a weight was pressing on his chest. “I can’t tell you, okay?” He swallowed hard.
Silence. At first he thought you hung up but he could still hear a faint shuffling from the other end of the phone call.
The silence was somehow worse than you cursing him out for bailing.
“Why not? I thought we told each other everything.” your voice was softer this time, more fragile
God, how badly he wanted to. He wanted to tell you about the fights, the injuries he had to patch up alone, the weight of trying to be a hero when all he wanted was to be a normal guy. But if he told you he'd put you into too much risk.
He couldn’t let that happen.
So he did what he always did.
He lied.
“I just need you to trust me,” he said even if his chest ached. “Please.”
You thought for a long moment, then shook your head with a sad smile even if he couldn't see you. “You say that like I don’t already.”
And that hurt more than any punch he’d ever taken.
Because he knew he was running out of chances. The more he lied the more it felt like you were walking away.
“Welp” you said, popping the P, as if trying to lighten up the mood, before taking a small pause. “I'm already half ready and Gwen really wants us to go to the party so if you change your mind just call me?”
"Okay," he whispered into the phone.
"Bye, Rafe." The call ended with a soft beep, leaving him alone with the silence. 
“i suck” He let out a heavy sigh, groaning as he flopped onto his bed. The mask, half-folded over his face, slipped down, unfolding on its own. It rested against his nose—a quiet, relentless reminder of the responsibilities he has over the city.
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"Heyyyy!" Gwen called out, sprinting toward you from the front steps of the school, where she had been waiting. Her face lit up the moment she spotted you approaching.
You hesitated, glancing at the building behind her, you could hear music thumping from inside. 
“Rafe is not with you?” she asked, looking around you thinking she might have missed him.
“No, you know how he is. He bailed again” you sighed.
“What is his problem?” She didn't wait for an answer and continued, “you know what? let's forget about him and just have fun” she looped her arm with yours and instantly began dragging you.
The homecoming party was in full swing, music pounding against the walls, and laughter echoed through the gym where it took place. It reeked of sweat, and the floor was already sticky as if someone had dropped bottles of juice on the floor and honestly if Rafe was here you would have begged him to leave with you already.
You tried to enjoy the moment, despite the nagging feeling in the back of your mind. You clutched a red Solo cup filled with non alcoholic fruit punch, swirling the liquid mindlessly. You knew you’d only take a few sips—just enough to look like you were part of the fun.
Beside you, Gwen nudged your arm with a playful grin. “Come on, loosen up a little! It's homecoming, not a funeral.”
You laughed, rolling your eyes. “I’m trying, okay? This just isn’t really my scene.”
 “You mean you don’t love being crammed in a gym full of sweaty high schoolers who haven't  learned what deodorant is yet, with music so loud it could cause permanent hearing damage?” Gwen dramatically gasped.
“Shocking, right?” You smirked.
“Alright, no excuses. One dance. Then I’ll let you go back to brooding in the corner with your untouched fruit punch.” She grabbed your hand, pulling you toward the dance floor
You sighed but let her drag you along anyway , attempting to let go of the tension in your chest just for a few minutes.
But it didn't last long. 
A single phone rang loudly, cutting through the music—then another, and another, until the entire gym was filled with the sound of alerts. Conversations stopped, and a wave of confusion swept through the crowd as people scrambled to check their phones. Those who had left theirs at home leaned over shoulders, desperate to see what was happening.
It was an emergency alert.
A link attached to the notification led to a live report from a hovering news helicopter. The shaky footage showed Spider-Man in a brutal fight with something massive—a creature that towered over him. Gasps and murmurs spread through the party as people recognized what they were seeing.
Another lizard.
New York had seen its fair share of Dr. Curt Connors copycats, but this one was different. It was bigger—almost dinosaur-sized; its scaly skin was reflecting the city lights as it tore through the streets. The ground seemed to shake even through the screen.
“This… this one’s huge,” someone whispered, their voice barely audible over the growing panic.
The realization hit all at once. This wasn’t just another mad scientist playing with forbidden experiments and  chemicals. This was something worse. And it was heading straight for the school.
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The battle outside was relentless. The massive Lizard roared, its tail whipping through the air, sending cars flying like toys that weighed nothing. Rafe gritted his teeth, webbing up debris and yanking himself through the air to keep up with the monster’s destructive path.
Every web he shot was torn apart and all his strength did nothing against the creature. Rafe's body ached, exhaustion creeping in faster than he wanted to admit. The Lizard was too strong, too fast, and it was pushing forward, heading straight toward the school. Toward you.
He forced himself to move, barely dodging a swipe of the creature’s paws. His vision blurred for a moment, his limbs trembling. His suit was torn. He was too weak. He wasn’t going to make it.  
Then he saw it. In that small moment of hesitation, that single breath he allowed himself to take, the monster had surged forward. Its massive feet slammed into the school celling, reducing the entrance to ashes. Dust and debris shot into the air as the walls groaned under its weight. His chest tightened—he had wasted precious seconds
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A deafening explosion sent shockwaves through the school, knocking people off their feet. walls shattered, dust lifted in the air, screams filled the gym, all the lights were shut off putting the school in full black out and the once-lively party descended into chaos.
Everyone was running frantically, The entire building shook as you all felt the creature getting closer seeking destruction. All you could hear was the scream of people desperately trying to find an exit. 
“We have to go!” Gwen took your hand and began running but there was nowhere to run, the school was falling piece by piece.
The next thing you knew, the Lizard’s massive paw tore through the ceiling, debris raining down. Screams got louder and louder. It wasn’t just destroying the building—it was tearing apart anything in its path.
Even students.
You barely had time to process the horror unfolding before your eyes. The sickening sound of ripping metal, the desperate cries for help—it was too much. You wanted to run, to do something, but your body felt frozen in place, paralyzed by terror.
And then you saw it.
A lifeless hand, limp beneath the rubble. A shoe that hadn’t been there seconds ago. Blood smeared across the floor where moments earlier, there had been laughter.
Your breath hitched, your chest was tightening with a grief so sharp it felt like it might crush you. This wasn’t just destruction. It was a massacre..
You barely had time to process  it before a chunk of debris came crashing down—right toward you and a figure dressed in red and blue dropped from the ceiling and came at you as fast as light could travel.
In a blur of motion, you were flying through the air, held tightly against a strong chest. 
“You need to go!”  Spiderman yelled as soon as he dropped you back on your feet. But you couldn't hear him over the roars and the screams.
Before you could respond, a violent force knocked you both apart. You tumbled across the floor, the wind knocked from your lungs and the monster hovered over you. 
Spider-Man lunged, webbing the creature’s face and yanking it backward. “Run!” he shouted at you, desperation in his tone. He fought with everything he had, flipping, dodging, striking with all the strength he could collect. But the Lizard was relentless.
Then, in the chaos, you tried to run—but the Lizard’s tail lashed out, striking you hard. The sound of impact was harsh. You hit the ground with a sickening thud.
“No!” Rafe’s voice cracked, Something inside him snapped. Rage flooded his veins, and every ache, every ounce of exhaustion vanished.
With a furious roar, he attacked. His punches came harder, his movements faster. He webbed the Lizard’s limbs, yanking it into the ground with a force that shattered concrete. He didn’t let up. He couldn’t. Not after what had just happened.
Finally, with one last web the monster was tied to the floor unmoving and unconscious, the host of the lizard and succumbed.
But none of it mattered.
Rafe stumbled toward you, collapsing beside you before pulling his mask up to truly see you.
 “No, no, no—come on” he pleaded, his hands lifted your head up and he felt the liquid pouring out of the large gash behind your head. His blood stained hands trembled as he brushed the hair from your face, his vision blurred with tears. “Please, Y/n—”
Your eyes fluttered open slightly, breathing shallow. A weak, bittersweet smile ghosted your lips. “I always knew,” you whispered. “I always knew it was you.”
Rafe froze, his breath catching in his throat.
“I just… wished you told me,” You murmured, fingers barely gripping his suit. “I still would’ve… loved you.”
Tears streamed down his face. “No, don’t—don’t talk like that. You’re going to be okay. I promise, I—”
But you exhaled one last breath, your hand slipping from his suit. Your body went still.
“Please, no. i love you” he lifted your body further into his as if his warmth could bring you back but it didn't.
And after that moment the canon remained intact.
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sturniololuvz · 23 hours ago
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Could you write a fic where like there sisters only 17 and they find a positive pregnancy test and at first there mad and asking who the guy is but then they support her the whole way if that makes sense
omg yes!!! I LOVE THIS ONEEEEE
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“Always By Your Side”
Sturniolos x sister
Warnings : crying , yelling , comforting
Y/N had been keeping a secret.
For weeks, she’d been feeling off—tired, nauseous, emotional. At first, she brushed it off as stress, but deep down, she knew something was wrong. So, with shaking hands and a racing heart, she bought a pregnancy test and took it in the safety of her bathroom.
And when the test turned positive, her world flipped upside down.
She didn’t know how to tell her brothers.
How could she? They were protective, overbearing, and sometimes a little dramatic. She wasn’t ready for their reaction—wasn’t ready for the yelling, the disappointment, the questions. So, she hid the test in the bathroom trash and planned to figure things out on her own.
Except she wasn’t careful enough.
Discovery & Breakdown
“Y/N!”
Her heart nearly stopped when she heard Nick’s voice from the hallway, sharp and panicked.
“Come here. Now.”
Swallowing hard, she stepped out of her room and into the bathroom doorway—where all three of her brothers stood, staring at the small plastic stick in Matt’s hand.
Chris was the first to break the silence. “Tell me this isn’t yours.”
Her throat tightened. Her hands shook. She couldn’t find her voice.
“Y/N,” Matt tried, his voice softer than Nick’s but still filled with urgency, “please tell me this is some kind of joke.”
Tears welled in her eyes. She had no way out of this.
Nick ran a hand through his hair, his face contorted in anger, confusion, and worry. “Who’s the guy? When did this happen? Are you seriously—?”
“I don’t—I don’t wanna talk about it,” she choked out, her voice trembling as tears spilled down her cheeks.
“Not an option,” Chris snapped, pacing the bathroom. “Y/N, this is serious! We need to know who did this, what’s going on—”
“I don’t need you guys yelling at me!” she suddenly screamed, her emotions boiling over. “I already know I messed up! I’m scared, and I don’t need you three making it worse!”
The triplets fell silent at her outburst. The only sound was Y/N’s quiet sobs as she buried her face in her hands.
Matt was the first to move. Without a word, he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into a tight hug. She clung to him, shaking, as Chris and Nick softened, their anger melting into something else—concern.
“Hey,” Nick sighed, rubbing his face. “We’re not mad at you. We’re just… freaking out.”
Chris exhaled heavily, nodding. “Yeah. But you don’t have to do this alone, okay?”
Y/N sniffled, pulling back to look at them. “You guys aren’t… mad at me?”
Matt shook his head. “We’re worried. But you’re our sister, Y/N. We’ve got you.”
The First Trimester - Morning Sickness & Mood Swings
The next few weeks were brutal.
Morning sickness hit her hard. She spent most mornings in the bathroom, curled over the toilet, feeling miserable.
Chris was the one who started waking up early to make sure she had crackers and ginger ale.
Nick took charge of making doctor’s appointments, reading way too many pregnancy articles, and constantly asking, “Are you drinking enough water?”
Matt, always the peacemaker, was there for every emotional breakdown—whether it was crying over a sad commercial or getting irrationally mad when they brought home the wrong kind of ice cream.
“Okay, I love you guys,” she sniffled one night, curled up on the couch, “but if one more person tells me to drink water, I’m throwing something.”
Chris immediately hid his water bottle behind his back.
The Second Trimester - Cravings & Baby Kicks
By the second trimester, things got easier. The morning sickness faded, and her energy returned. But the cravings were wild.
At 2 a.m., she shook Nick awake.
“I need pickles and peanut butter.”
He groaned. “Are you serious?”
“Dead serious.”
Fifteen minutes later, he was back with pickles, peanut butter, and a very annoyed expression.
Then came the first time the baby kicked.
She gasped, grabbing Matt’s arm. “Oh my God, she moved!”
His eyes widened, and he immediately called for the others.
The three of them took turns feeling her belly, their excitement making her heart swell.
“That’s so weird,” Chris muttered in awe.
Nick grinned. “That’s so cool.”
Matt just shook his head with a soft smile. “She’s gonna be so loved.”
The Third Trimester - Nesting & Nerves
As the due date got closer, the triplets went into full big brother mode.
Chris built the crib (with only minimal cursing), Matt organized all the baby clothes, and Nick made sure the hospital bag was packed perfectly.
But one night, Y/N broke down.
“What if I’m not ready?” she whispered, tears in her eyes. “What if I’m a terrible mom?”
Nick knelt beside her, taking her hand. “You’re gonna be amazing, Y/N. And you’re not alone. We’re right here.”
“Yeah,” Chris added. “You and Baby Girl? You’ve got the best uncles ever.”
Matt smiled. “She’s lucky to have you.”
And for the first time in months, Y/N truly believed them.
The Birth - Meeting Baby Girl
When labor hit, chaos erupted.
Chris nearly passed out.
Nick was screaming at the hospital staff.
Matt was the calmest—holding her hand, whispering, “You got this, Y/N.”
And after hours of pain, tears, and sheer exhaustion—she heard the first cry of her baby girl.
She sobbed as they placed her daughter in her arms, her tiny fingers curling around Y/N’s.
“She’s beautiful,” Matt whispered.
Nick wiped his eyes, pretending he wasn’t crying. “She’s so small.”
Chris, still in shock, muttered, “I’m gonna teach her the best pranks.”
Y/N laughed through her tears, looking down at her daughter—her whole world.
And as she held her little girl, surrounded by the three boys who never left her side, she knew one thing for sure.
No matter what, they would always be a family.
35 notes · View notes
luvether · 2 days ago
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First of all I just want to say, Victoria hi hello, I hope this isn’t your first impression of me and secondly, this may or may not have become a textual analysis so...just like how this fic is lengthy (in a damn good way oh don’t get me started on this) my comments will be also long and detailed cuz you’re so damn insane for this fic.
Another note I read this at the very late hours of 1:50am, burned through this until 4:00am went to bed then when I got up i read from 12-1pm and i wish i had the ability to erase what i read from my mind and read it again because Vic you COOKED, i got so much things to say but the whole summary of it is that you cooked, so hard and so deliciously this night just me my favorite fic on tumblr.
And i’m slightly sad that long fics don’t get the same amount of love and treatment as others because this was honestly the best thing I’ve read in so long so fellas, please give this fic a chance if you have the time. I’m telling you right now, as a very picky writer and an even pickier reader (i did not enjoy cruel prince and fourth wing typa picky)
HANDS DOWN THIS WAS THE BEST READ I EVER GOT THE GRACE OF EVER WITNESSING WITH MY TWO EYES,
I wish i can conceal and stop my yapping right now to save my dignity but Vic, i’ll write down a whole ass lecture + essay for you for writing this heaven-sent aven fic.
1.) first and foremost, what i liked about this was the world building. THE WORLDBUILDING HAD ME HOOKED. I fear you ate with how you described the world, it did not feel overwhelming or draggy. I’ll list down some pirate-y words that i really liked because i wrote it down in my notes while reading this (i’m not pathetic i swear)
World-building is insane btw, every single detail and even terms i never really heard before like, cutlasses, perfume cloying nose, hull, pinafore aprons…this entire thing does not feel flat, in fact it’s extremely organic and i really like how you place so much details on building up this pirate-ish world (maybe im just way too fascinated because i’ve never consumed any media/books/movies that’s pirate related, not even pirates of the Caribbean or the third movie of Narnia where they were out in the sea, so i guess this is my first exposure to this theme in particular and i’m very much loving it so far) - Koue at the lovely hours of 2:45am
2.) JADE. that’s all. The way you write Jade….Lord in heaven give me this talent. Again, words below came from my notes last night,
Upon pushing the heavy door open, you’re greeted with the chime above tinkling at your arrival and the scent of heavy perfume cloying your nose.
As she approaches, you can pick up on her perfume of white florals and red wine. 
but there’s an almost unnatural hiss to her words, not unlike that of a snake’s. Her voice is also vaguely snake-like too- the way certain words are stretched out, the weirdly sharp pronunciation of consonants clashing with the almost syrupy vowels that tempt you to lower your defenses, the lack of cadence- all make you unconsciously be on guard.
HO IS YOU MAGIC WHAT IN THE WORLD IS THIS WORDING /pos reading this at 1:50am and you had my jaw going slack, highlighting this specifically—certain words stretches out, weirdly sharp pronunciation of consonants clashing with the almost syrupy vowels that tempt you to lower your guard >>>
Oh my god the way you write Jade, i never really paid attention to her in game since i was on a hsr hiatus when she came out but reading your interpretation of her i can tell that you carefully thought of her characterization and its soo well done, all her dialogues are written so delicately & with so much thought and again, the paragraph above when you described how she says stuff, Vic are you a wizard? I really really like how you worded that, it’s literally my fave sentence TT
Also the follow up banter after that was so funny, the aven + reader dynamic piqued my interest eueu
By the way, is it bad to say that when i read your aventurine it kinda reminds me of Luka from alnst,, just a little bit at first,
3.) I’ll go in order but just gonna highlight some of my fave paragraphs from this fic:
LOVE THE WAY YOU WRITE AVENTURINE. FROM START TO FINISH. this was also an epiphany because i never really wrote for him too, so this is my first aven exposure and it’s already my fave.
“I know someone who can fetch us a good price for them. You won’t have to worry about that,” he responds as he lets the diamonds slip back into the chest through his fingers like fat, glistening raindrops.
(lets the diamonds slip back into the chest through his fingers like fat, glistening raindrops - deserves to be framed on my wall respectfully.)
“Here. Keep these. You’ll look good in ‘em.”
“Then at least keep one or two of those gold chains as well,” you say as you clasp it shut around your neck. Aventurine shakes his head again, laughing snarkily.
“Nah. Not my taste. Not gaudy enough.”
“That’s what I said earli- wait, not gaudy enough?”
He meets your disbelieving expression with an innocent one and a shrug of his shoulders.
“What? A pirate captain’s gotta look the part. The more in-your-face, the better.”
Reader is everything haha, knows about medicine, carpentry, business talks, plays an instrument and a good yapper?? I wish I was this multi-talented.
Aventurine’s naming game isn’t half bad, love bby Doubloon and the ship Lady Luck, sounds very aven coded indeed.
“Do you… ever regret what happened that night?”
“No,” he admits without any hesitation. “I may have lost my vision, but I saved my pretty nurse who stitched me back together and fretted over me afterward, and that’s enough to make a man do anything. And… well… for my eyes, let’s just say I’d rather gouge them out most of the time.”
AVENTURINE. A.VEN.TU.RINE. that’s the type of flirty remark that would have me falling, like falling hard. This had me smiling and like, sniffling cuz it genuinely made me want to kick my pillows, i feel hot reading that, needed to fan myself before continuing.
Is aventurine like, those ghost pirates? Now i know why i mentioned that Aventurine reminds me of luka- he had those blue fingertips so i made an unconscious comparison. He’s definitely like that blue-piratey person from SpongeBob i forgot the term that they’re called ?
Just searched it up, but i was thinking about that pirate from the Flying Dutchman? it might not be, but that’s the first thing that came to my mind.
AVENTURINE SPOILING YOU, AVENTURINE SPOILING YOU, he’s getting attached and with reason. Love this kinda of mutualistic slow burn. I’ll be honest, I haven’t also read a proper Aven fic, this is my first and I’m glad that it is. It may be my standard of Aven characteristics from here on out.
Calling Aven’s hat ostentatious >> that’s a good word Vic
4.) I swear this is already all over the place…haha anyways, the fourth thing I wanted to point out was everyone else besides the one i already mentioned. Ratio and Topaz and Numby in particular, my god YOU DID THEM SO WELL. Despite this being an aven x reader fic I absolutely love—with my dying breath—that this isn’t just centered around them. Ratio had his few shares of screen times and I loved every single one of it, also with the moment of reader trying to recruit Topaz—it builds so much character!! ❤︎
Below are my spontaneous thoughts, again from my notes whilst I was live reading:
WE ARE RECRUITING VERITAS ARENT WE, I need to calm down and lessen my caps- just saw the word university and I’m sitting up from my bed. oh my god Ratio is gonna join 😭 😭 pls join you silly scholar, I’m so excited on how you’ll portray him, you did not disappoint with aven, jade and reader so far.
FINAL VICTOR MENTION !! the very iconic verivasha lc ❤︎
Okay,, he’s flushed. Am I interrupting something or what TT
You take in his ruby-rimmed golden eyes, the color of the sunset a few hours ago, that hold the weight of a genius’s expectations behind them. 
The way you describe ratio’s eyes >>
Ship Navigator Veritas!! The role definitely suits him <33
He settles into the empty room next door to your quarters. Bookshelves line the walls from floor to ceiling, with several more stacked on his desk and bed. It perpetually smells like clean linens and chalk from the stash he burns through every week solving whatever problem piques his interest, written out on the rolling blackboard by the windows- or through hurling them at your captain with terrifying strength and speed.
Genuinely feels like I’m watching someone play a game, if that makes sense? The domesticity of having Ratio on board and him decorating his room, his mannerisms filling up the vibe within Lady Luck with Captain Aven and reader, feels like playing a game TT it’s the same feeling of when Sunday boards the express
You might hear me say this like a millions times, but you writing little details like reader explaining about adding lime juice on rum to make the water supply edible is such a masterpiece, again, a sucker for tiny details like that because it’s usually glossed over on storytelling and media most of the time, makes everything feel really in depth.
Also, is scurvy a normal thing when you’re out at sea? I didn’t do research but this is like the second time it was mentioned,
Ohh okay never mind, reader answered my rhetorical question
Ratio isn’t a drinker noted 😭 him chugging down water after is funny
Fourth member already?? It’s topaz for sure
Yup, it’s definitely topaz, briefly saw a part of her character story / maybe it was from that belobog quest where she came from a poor planet.
Also, love how this is not aven-centered. Like the moments with topaz and ratio grrrr
“That’s the Lady Luck for you! She’s a fickle one like her namesake. Sometimes, she’ll try and drown you just for spite. She keeps even me on my toes at all times and I’m her captain. Isn’t that right?”
LIVE LAUGH LOVE LADY LUCK I’M ALREADY SEVERELY ATTACHED TO IT
a kraken whose single tentacle was longer than your ship measured from prow to stern,
From prow to stern is wild, my fave line from this paragraphs
Topaz had nearly passed out from anxiousness the first time he’d bet her life alongside yours and Ratio’s not long after she’d joined, while Ratio had lifted Aventurine up by the collar and nearly thrown him overboard. It was only thanks to your intervention and pleading that your captain hadn’t met his end that day.
I LOVE THE IPC TRIO SO MUCH, their personalities shine and bloom soo much in this fic, I want to read more of their dynamic
“... There’s no storm that Veritas can’t lead us out of,” you quietly reassure. “No monster that Jelena can’t kill. No injury that I can’t heal.”
A hand sneaks out from beneath the covers to grasp his.
“And no captain better fit to lead us through the storm than you. So chin up, ok? We’ll make it out together on the other side surrounded by calm seas just fine.”
WHAT IF I CRY. WHAT THEN, IM SO ATTACHED AND I LOVE THIS SM. I’ve been quietly following you when you mention about this fic on the server and I’m soo glad I listened to the voices in my head and picked it up. I’m genuinely sad that I didn’t ask for a tag 😭 such a gem of a read.
He pouts, fins drooping. Boo. There goes a courting attempt out the window. 
PLEASE THE WAY I STARTED LAUGHING. Puppy coded Aventurine is not something I find myself being fond of in the first few weeks of February but it is welcomed, he was written so well in this fic. ALSO THE DETAIL OF HIM WILLINGLY GIVING YOU HIS SCALES AND TEAR DROPS, get you a man that’s yearns so bad like Aventurine, he looks at you with expectant wide eyes while giving you literally pieces of himself that’s incredibly valuable. (Also find it hella endearing when reader plopped him back in the bath, like sobbing i was all over their dynamic from start to finish 😭)
There will come a day when the Lady Luck will complete her last voyage, Aventurine will have to return to the seas, and the crew will be disbanded, but that day isn’t today. It won’t be when he comes clean to the crew either. Rather, it’ll be in the far future when no amount of repairs can keep the Lady Luck from falling apart and you’re no longer able to handle the challenges of life at sea. But you’ll cross that bridge when you get there. 
“So where to next, Captain?”
Banger last line, banger end paragraphs. You just single-handedly made me fall in love with Aventurine, Reader, Topaz, Ratio, Jade and Lady Luck in a span of 20k + words.
Even I didn’t feel this connection with an mc in a goddamn book.
Yup, that’s where my thoughts end. So to conclude everything and I feel like i’m just repeating words, Victoria the writer that you are, I would reread this a million times and not get bored. The world building is phenomenal, the way you structure your paragraphs, i have a bunched of highlighted sentences throughout this fic because the way you word things is so impressive. The way you characterize all the hsr characters is to die for, it’s characterized in a way that you can clearly see them acting like this canonically. the build up, the little details that makes this entire story so fleshed out, the sea-borne diseases, the looting and trading business shabang, the navigating beyond the seas.
This pirate AU was such a treat to read and if ever, you write this again, or not euue please tag me 🥹💌
— Yours sincerely, a sudden fan and surprisingly your mutual (idk how tf we are moots) Koue 🧸
hello, sailor!
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SYNOPSIS: all aboard the lady luck and set sail for a new adventure! life on land doesn't satisfy you, so why not take to the seas instead? while working under captain aventurine as the primary nurse onboard, everything you've ever wanted is within your grasp, and yet the mystery surrounding your captain is still there, just short of being solved. just what kind of secrets lie hidden beneath that charming smile and silver tongue?
CHARACTERS: aventurine, topaz, ratio, jade, robin
TAGS: fem coded reader (wearing dresses, makeup, but they/them pronouns still used), mentions of drinking, gambling, harassment toward reader, drowning, numby is a regular piglet in this fic, 23.9k wc (get some snacks and a drink ready for this one), mild angst, some suggestiveness
NOTES: thought my aventurine kissery phase was over then hoyo uploaded the pirate art of him and now its back to square one
special thanks to my pookies @https-sourlimes and @tragedy-of-commons for proofreading this behemoth of a fic! with much love mwah 💋
very late but @lowkeyren hihihi ren!! I got u for secret santa and hope u enjoy this fic!
TAGLIST: @harque, @akutasoda, @hazyue, @gabile18, @khoncore, @moineauz, @mikashisus, @vxnuslogy, @papiliotao, @gl4di0lus
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The rolling sea has always beckoned you.
It’s always been there, tucked away in the back of your mind, usually hidden but resurfacing like the corals and lost trinkets at low tide you’d go scavenging for when no one was looking. Conch shells hold the secrets of the ocean that enrapture you for hours on end and you drape yourself in weathered jewelry washed ashore. Dried-up starfish and seashells and multicolored sea glass litter your home, and yet it isn’t enough. These trinkets pile up and gather dust in your home as you chase after what you’re really after- a way out. 
You’ve been surrounded by the sea your entire life, born and raised in this very port town. You grew up hearing stories of lands faraway from your parents and the workers down at the docks. Infamous pirates and honorable seamen alike and their journeys were your bedtime stories as a kid. You never see the same unfamiliar face twice in a place like this and perhaps it’s this ability to come and go as you please that captured your heart from a young age. Appearing and disappearing like an apparition with rumors of your conquests and the freedom a life at sea granted… it was enough to grab your attention as a kid and never let go.
And yet, you’ve never ventured into the open seas. The most you’ve done is swim around at the beach, but you’ve never been able to push further than that. Theoretically, you should’ve been able to leave long before now, but your plans never made it past the first step. You’ve been denied passage aboard ships at every turn for countless reasons, all of them stupider than the last. Eventually, your motivation died down until you resigned yourself to a dull life on land- but the dream never fizzled out completely. Even now, you still stroll along the beach and search for answers. 
Down at the dock, you hear of sailors and pirates alike drunkenly telling tales of sirens and their bewitching songs they waged war against at sea. You wager that the sea’s freedom beckons to you the same way a siren’s song does to them- irresistible, enchanting, and inescapable no matter where you are. 
When work is slow, you find yourself staring out at the sea through the window, just watching as the tides recede and crash onto the shoreline repeatedly. At night, you’d catch yourself at the beach with your feet in the sand and the salty waters lapping at your ankles without any recollection of how you got there. Maybe sleepwalking? But something tells you that’s not the answer. 
But this time, you suddenly find yourself standing in waist-deep water, completely alone and without a sound to be heard. Not even the usual sound of squawking gulls circling overhead can be heard. That’s strange. The harbor is always busy, with goods being transported and people seeking asylum. There’s ships docked and as far as you can tell, it’s as normal of a day as any other. And yet, there’s no life to be seen or heard. No crabs scuttling along the sandy beach, no people strolling along the boardwalk, no shouts of street vendors peddling their wares to passersby. Just you, the sea, and its ever-growing temptation.
You think it’s somewhere around early evening from the position of the sun, but you aren’t sure how long you stare toward the horizon, unblinking. But when you do blink, you see a pirate ship coming into view. She’s quite possibly the most incredible ship you’ve ever seen in your life, with several sails, a sturdy hull, and a flag fluttering proudly atop the mainmast. And she’s heading right toward you. If you swim out further or wait where you are for a while longer, she’ll pass by, giving you the perfect opportunity to sneak onboard. 
You look back one last time before heading further out to sea. You slip below the water. It’s pleasantly warm and you wonder why you’ve never attempted this before.
The siren’s embrace, that is the ocean’s form of freedom, is growing stronger. 
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Port towns aren’t known for being the safest, especially those frequented by pirates. Public drunken brawls, looting by particularly greedy pirate crews, lechery, and disturbance of the peace with the occasional count of public indecency, are commonplace almost every night. Usually, you’re able to avoid most of it, but today isn’t your lucky day. 
“Hey, pretty lady! Mind comin’ home-”
Crash!
An empty beer bottle goes flying by, barely missing his head and shattering into bits against the brick wall behind him. He lets out an unusually high-pitched squeak for someone of his size and stares as you storm past, his mouth agape. Another sailor behind him laughs at his plight, to which he spins around and cusses toward his face. You make it out just in time as the first punch is thrown. 
One drunken sailor is more than enough to deal with, you decide. You decide that you’ll take your chances and go past the port as a shortcut back home, even though it’s late. 
It’s silent besides the sloshing of the waves and mostly empty. There’s some burly guards patrolling in front of the more ostentatious pirate ships that spare a glance as you hurry by, but it’s otherwise deserted at this hour. 
Until you approach the end of the harbor where few ships are docked. You hear the faint sounds of a struggle- a punch being thrown, a man’s muffled scream, glass shattering, the wet squelch of a knife sinking into flesh, and the thud of a body hitting the ground. From the shadows, you see two people emerge. A blond man drags someone out by the hair with a knife in hand. Even from here, you can see the dark slick staining the wood. There’s a ship directly in front of him. You assume it belongs- or belonged- to the now-lifeless body being dragged along. The blond looks around, then freezes up upon seeing you. The hand holding the knife tenses at his side and the two of you stay locked in place like that for a bit, daring to see who will make the first move. Shockingly bright neon eyes meet yours and you jolt. You’ve never seen anyone with eyes like his.
But there’s a ship that’s still waiting. You recall that strange dream you had a few nights ago.
… On second thought, perhaps today is your lucky day after all. 
You slowly clap, starting to move forward, and the blond steps back. The knife in his hands, now aimed at you, is a tiny thing. It’s rusted, the blade is most likely dull, and even the butter knife in your kitchen would laugh at it. 
“Congrats on winning. Got any injuries you need patched up?”
No response. You try again. 
“I see those injuries you got from that fight. Those wounds of yours won’t heal overnight. Someone has to be there to ensure they don’t get infected.”
“... You’re a nurse?”
His voice comes out smoother than expected. Amusement and snark drip from the words, thick as honey, like he can’t believe you’re a medical professional. And yet, you can hear the tenseness in his voice and see it in his coiled muscles, ready to spring back into action again. 
You ignore the jab toward you and point toward the winding cobblestone streets that you came from. The sounds of a fight can be heard coming from the town square even out here. 
“Run a practice in town. Certified and everything if you’re real nitpicky and care about my credentials. Though most sailors that come through the door could care less when they’ve got a pretty lady lookin’ over ‘em and are used to amputations for the most minor of infections.”
“I’m surprised you haven’t been snatched up by another pirate crew yet then,” he smugly remarks, voice as smooth as velvet yet concealing a sharp edge.
“Oh, there’ve been attempts alright. Promises of double the booty a normal seaman would receive, the finest quarters second only to the captain, medical supplies taking utmost priority when docking, and many many more. Hah! All nice and cute, but we know that in a few months time, all those promises will have fallen out the window and I’ll be regarded with no less respect than the lowliest seaman onboard.”
He leans back against a wooden post, roughly kicking the man from earlier until his bleeding head is submerged underwater. You spare a glance at the poor soul before looking back at him.
“Got a ship now?”
“... It’s not much, but it’s something to start with.”
He looks behind him and as he does so, the sleeves of his rags shift to reveal the injuries lying beneath. A sharp intake of breath is the only sign you’ve seen them, but his keen ears pick up on it. He tugs his sleeves down and glowers over his shoulder in your direction. 
“You don’t have any medical expertise, do you?” you ask, ignoring his irritation. “Not a good idea to go out conquerin’ the seven seas without a nurse on board. Matter of fact, I doubt you’d even get that far. Probably die off from scurvy or something preventable.”
His silence speaks volumes. You brush past him and set foot onto his stolen ship- little more than a glorified rowboat with a mast and a single sail. It couldn’t even be called a sailboat. 
Still, he won’t go down so easily. He crosses his arms in front of his chest and stares you down behind his thick bangs obscuring his vision.
“And why should I welcome you aboard?”
“Simple. We both get what we want.”
You reach your hand out to him.
“You get a trained, qualified medical professional to treat your wounds, and I get to escape this rinky-dink, backwater port town. A mutually beneficial deal, don’t you agree?”
He racks his mind for an excuse, anything, really, to turn you down. But he can’t come up with anything. The wounds all over his body really do need treatment that he doesn’t have the expertise for. There’s enough room for two people in the boat and he knows you’re smart enough to have realized that by now. 
It’s fine. I’ll just dump them off at the next port and be on my way. Problem solved. 
With no excuse that can fly under your radar, he pushes his irritation down and forces a smile onto his face. He reaches a hand out and it’s just now you notice his ghostly blue fingertips.
… He’s not entirely human, is he?
“Your name?”
“(Name).”
“Welcome aboard, Nurse (Name).”
You brush your thoughts aside and shake his hand. It’s cold. 
“Pleasure, Captain…?”
“Aventurine.”
You squeeze his hand firmly one last time.
“Pleasure to be working with you, Captain Aventurine.”
Captain, huh? He tries the title on for size in his mind as you get settled in, rolling it around on his tongue. 
I could get used to being called that.
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Even though he initially promised himself that he’d kick you out at the next port, that never happens. You pass by several ports, and yet you stay onboard. Perhaps it’s because he finds his first treasure alongside you on an island that many have sailed past countless times. The treasure was hiding under everyone’s noses the entire time, both of you managing to uncover it with a bit of wit and a hefty amount of luck. Aventurine supposes part of himself feels indebted to you, much as he hates the sensation. You found your first treasures together and you’ve admittedly been taking good care of his wounds born from years of enslavement. The healing process is coming along slowly but steadily.
Perhaps he’ll let you stay for a bit longer. Until you get your share of this treasure. He gives credit where credit is due, at least.
“I can’t believe this has been here this whole time,” you say as the treasure chest is finally unearthed. Aventurine sets the shovel down, and on the count of three, you lift it out to go through its contents.  It’s no sizable amount of loot by any means, but it’s not half-bad for your first haul. Some gemstones that are admittedly rather small, jewelry, a few rusted cutlasses that with some elbow grease, could be restored to their former state, and some golden coins from a bygone era.
You hold some gold chains up in front of him, as if seeing what he’d look like with them on. He casts a glance down and shakes his head in disapproval. 
“I know, too gaudy, right?” you ask as you set them back into the chest. He holds up a handful of uncut diamonds, all of varying sizes, and watches as they twinkle in the sunlight. “At least we can pawn ‘em off.”
“I know someone who can fetch us a good price for them. You won’t have to worry about that,” he responds as he lets the diamonds slip back into the chest through his fingers like fat, glistening raindrops. Diamonds are almost worthless on their own, but if he sends them to a jeweler to be cut and polished and perhaps turned into jewelry, then perhaps he can squeeze out a bit of value from them… Or perhaps he should just leave them the way they are, given her hobby for finding true gems in the rough. 
He finds a string of pearls and after a moment for inspection, tosses them over to you.
“Here. Keep these. You’ll look good in ‘em.”
“Then at least keep one or two of those gold chains as well,” you say as you clasp it shut around your neck. Aventurine shakes his head again, laughing snarkily.
“Nah. Not my taste. Not gaudy enough.”
“That’s what I said earli- wait, not gaudy enough?”
He meets your disbelieving expression with an innocent one and a shrug of his shoulders.
“What? A pirate captain’s gotta look the part. The more in-your-face, the better.”
There’s someone already waiting for you when you return to land to pawn off your treasure. According to Aventurine, she owns one of the most prosperous pawn shop chains out there and always fetches a fair price for her customers, so long as they have something equally valuable to give her in return. 
“Just remember to always address her as ‘Lady Bonajade’ and nothing else. She doesn’t take too kindly to those who don’t have manners,” he whispers to you as you weave your way between the crowded streets to the pawn shop’s address. 
“Sounds like an interesting person,” you whisper back. “Should I be scared?”
He scoffs. “Not unless you’re looking to trade something beyond our treasure. Just don’t say anything rash. Let me handle it.”
The pawn shop is tucked away in a corner of town that sees few people. The exterior is surprisingly well-maintained for this part of town and a sign reading “Bonajade Exchange” in elegant violet cursive lettering hangs above the door. You can’t see into the shop’s windows and you can’t hear any activity from inside either. Upon pushing the heavy door open, you’re greeted with the chime above tinkling at your arrival and the scent of heavy perfume cloying your nose. It smells heavily of florals and incense, with a hint of smoke present. The candle flames waver and flicker as the door shuts and you take a moment to look around the shop. The heavy velvet curtains across the windows are drawn, letting only a small sliver of sunlight in. The only other source of lighting is the candles scattered throughout that illuminate the treasures displayed almost carelessly throughout the store. Polished and cut gemstones lie in display cases alongside gold bars and jewelry. Weapons of all sorts are hung along the walls alongside maps and thick, aged atlases on the bookshelves. It’s silent, save for the faint crackling of waxen flames, until an unfamiliar and elegant voice rings out from behind the curtain all the way in the back. 
“Welcome to Bonajade Exchange. Who are you? And what do you seek?”
There’s a moment of silence that follows, as if the speaker has recognized who you are. A candle is lit behind the curtain and you can make out the silhouette of a woman rising to her feet. 
“Oh, it’s you. We meet again, Aventurine.”
There’s a smile in her voice as she brushes the curtain aside and you get your first look at the owner of the shop. A wide-brimmed black hat obscures half of her face with a pale blue eye peeking out at you. She wears a white dress that’s undoubtedly made of silk or some other costly fabric with a dark blue corset. The silver and jade jewelry she wears (is that where she gets her name from?) clink pleasantly against each other alongside her heels, accompanied by a walking stick clicking against the wooden floor as she walks. As she approaches, you can pick up on her perfume of white florals and red wine. 
She comes to a stop and her eyes rake over you both, lingering on you especially. You catch a hint of something in her slitted pupils, like she knows something you don’t.
“I haven’t seen you before. I’m Lady Jade, the owner of this place. Are you a first-time customer to the Bonajade Exchange?”
Her voice is low and almost a whisper that has you hanging onto her every word. It’s as smooth as the silk used for her dress but there’s an almost unnatural hiss to her words, not unlike that of a snake’s. Her voice is also vaguely snake-like too- the way certain words are stretched out, the weirdly sharp pronunciation of consonants clashing with the almost syrupy vowels that tempt you to lower your defenses, the lack of cadence- all make you unconsciously be on guard. Under her chilling gaze, you feel yourself strangely clamming up and it’s all you can do to nod mutely. She hums and leans in closer, examining you head to toe. You feel like an item being offered up for auction yourself right now…
“And who might you be, lovely lady?”
You’re surrounded by ice.
“Nurse (Name)... Lady Bonajade,” you say, hurriedly adding her title at the end after remembering Aventurine’s advice from earlier. She smiles approvingly, a cold and benevolent thing. 
“You’re a good child who knows their manners. Alas, the same couldn’t be said for the man next to you when I first-”
Aventurine coughs. Jade stops talking, but the mirth still lingers in her eyes. A purple snake appears out of seemingly nowhere, winding around her shoulders and up her forearm before rearing its head at you. Its tongue flicks out to taste the air and it leans toward you before she gently pushes its head back. 
“Don’t mind it. It’s too curious for its own good at times,” she says offhandedly. Her baby blue irises drift toward the plain wooden crate sitting behind Aventurine and the beginnings of a smirk tug at the corners of her glossy lips. 
“Have you brought something valuable for me?”
Aventurine beckons you over and after a bit of effort, you pry open the lid to reveal the contents of the treasure you found. Jade strides forward and stops before the crate, examining it with interest.
“Look at that, you’ve finally found your first treasure. Where was it found?”
She raises an eyebrow and a hint of skepticism crosses her expression when Aventurine tells her the spot. 
“That island has been combed through countless times by other pirates. I find your claim hard to believe.”
Atlases and ancient records are brought out and she finally seems to believe him after cross-referencing the embossing on the back of a coin with a legend from that island. Just as you think you’re starting to get a grasp of the situation, a flurry of financial terms fly over your head as they argue over the market value of the items and how much cash you can walk away with today. 
… You’re way out of your comfort zone now. You’re a nurse, not a businessperson, for Aeon’s sake!
An agreement seems to be reached between the two of them. Jade readjusts her gloves and after calling some men over from the back, they begin going through the treasures and separating them into piles. Meanwhile, Aventurine turns his attention back to you.
“Fifty-fifty split.” You make the first move. 
Aventurine scoffs. “Absolutely not. Eighty-twenty at least.”
“Who do you think you are?”
“The captain, of cour-”
“Self-proclaimed,” you retort. “Doesn’t bear much weight with only a crew of two and each of us handling the work of at least five men. Seventy-thirty split since you want to be stingy.”
“Still too little.”
Your eyes narrow in irritation while his smug smirk never wavers.
“Seventy five-twenty five.”
“Fifty five-forty five.”
“Is that really any different from your initial offer of a fifty-fifty split?”
“That’s a five percent increase.”
“Yeah, only five percent.”
Jade chuckles from where she leans against the counter. The treasure has been fully cleared out and taken elsewhere. All that remains is an empty crate on the ground. 
“A five percent increase isn’t as narrow of a margin as you would think it is. Right now, that might not seem like much, but in the future when you start discovering more valuable and rarer treasures…”
She yawns and covers her mouth with a delicate hand. 
“Who knows? You could be looking at a gain of at least a couple thousand.”
Aventurine clicks his tongue and turns back to you. There’s one last offer you have before you give up and walk away. A new life in this town for the time being doesn’t seem too bad… 
“Sixty-forty.”
He stills at your offer. Jade’s eyes are trained on him as she lightly fans herself with a feathered folding fan. Her snake watches the exchange with seemingly keen interest too. 
“... You drive a hard bargain just like Lady Bonajade over here,” he grumbles as he forks over a portion of the credits to you. He leaves part of it on the counter, though.
“You have an innate sense for business,” comments Jade, as you leaf through the wad of bills. “Perhaps you’d like to refine it to its fullest potential?”
“Lady Bonajade, please stop trying to recruit every promising person that walks through your door.”
“It’s not just anyone I set my eyes on. It’s only those with exceptional talent that shine like gems in the rough,” she corrects. Her gaze flicks over to you again.
“Should you ever grow tired of a life at sea and wish to attain everything you desire… you know where to find me. I have branches all over the seven seas. I’ll be patiently waiting.”
Aventurine hurriedly hands you the stack of credits he set aside earlier.
“We’re running low on supplies. I still have business to discuss with her, so why don’t you go and pick them up for me?”
You nod and leave. The door shuts behind you, and Jade’s welcoming demeanor immediately disappears as soon as the shop is plunged into darkness again. Even though the climate is temperate in this stretch of the ocean, the temperature drops considerably. Her snake comes out of hiding and openly hisses at him. This time, she does nothing to reprimand it. 
“I see you’re planning to let a considerable asset go. My best advice for you would be to not.”
Aventurine barks out a laugh and meets her cold tone with one of his own.
“Meddling in my affairs, you damned sea witch-“
“You would do well to learn some manners from them, child,” she all but snaps. “Remember, I don’t give out advice for free. When I do, it’s because I see a great return of my investment in you on the horizon. It would be in your best interest to listen.”
She hisses the last word out and her pet snake does the same. Aventurine’s heart is racing, but he shows no sign of it. 
“A businesswoman through and through,” he remarks dryly. “Don’t think I didn’t notice how you called them an asset.”
“Oh? As if you see them any better than I do. At least I recognize their value. You, on the other hand, have seen them as a nuisance this whole time.”
She sighs. “Such potential headed straight to ruin under your care. It’s quite a waste. Perhaps I should take them under my wing instead, the same way I did with you… Better yet, why don’t I put them through the same refinement process the way I did with you? It’ll be a valuable learning experience for you both.”
Aventurine bristles, and Jade smirks, knowing she has the upper hand now. He’s reminded that just like that, Jade can take away everything he’s fought for. And shape the rest of your life to what she has envisioned.
“You will have them remain as a crewmate upon your ship. Don’t think I’m unaware of how your wounds are coming along. This is in your best interest as much as it is mine. Understood?”
He numbly nods. Jade hums happily and pats him on the shoulder.
“Good child. I expect even greater things from the two of you combined.”
There’s a knock at the front and the door swings open. The sudden brightness of the sun makes him squint, but he can see you standing there with several boxes behind you and some burly men carrying them.
“Captain, I picked up all our supplies. Is there anything else you need me to handle?”
“No, tell them to take them back to the ship. Wait there. I’m almost finished here.”
You nod and the door closes again. Jade turns to him with a knowing look in her eyes as she pulls away from the counter to head to the back again. 
“Captain,” she repeats with a teasing lilt. 
“Stop that,” he grumbles. She checks the time and barely spares him a glance over her shoulder as she retreats behind the curtain again. 
“The time for conversation has ended. Go now. It isn’t polite to keep your partners waiting for any longer than necessary.”
Just as he’s about to head out the door, he’s stopped by her again.
“Don’t disappoint me now, child.”
The only response she gets is the door slamming shut. 
He finds you waiting by the ship as instructed. You don’t even get the chance to ask him what happened as he pushes past you roughly and hoists the sails. Wordlessly, you weigh the anchor and as you set sail, Aventurine finds himself more thankful than ever for your ability to read the room. 
Yes, he barely tolerates you. He never wanted a second person aboard to begin with. But anything is better than catching Jade’s attention. From personal experience, it takes a very special kind of person to stay one move ahead in her games and he knows you aren’t cut from that cloth. Most people aren’t. You’d maybe hold out for a bit with your hidden wit, but you’d inevitably be offered up as a loan in her many dealings, getting passed around from ship to ship as a highly sought-after medic until you’d work yourself into an early grave. Only then would she lose interest and only because your market value would be at zero. 
His injuries have been healing nicely, but he still needs your care. He makes up his mind to let you stay on his ship for the time being. At least until Jade’s interest in you has died out or until his injuries are completely healed. Whichever one comes first. 
And that initial condition is forgotten about too. Jade’s interest in you never wanes and his scars have faded, but that’s not the reason why he lets you stay. You’re quite the handy person, proving yourself to be skilled in tasks outside of medicine. You surprise him with your skill in carpentry and business, although he already knows about the latter thanks to Jade. He’s a horrible cook, but you manage to save yourselves from starvation with your talent in the kitchen. 
Aventurine begrudgingly admits that you’re also fun to be around as time goes on. You’re quite the charming storyteller with a never-ending trove of stories to share. Many of your nights are shared together under the starry skies with a tankard of rum in hand as he listens to your animated and slightly slurred narration of stories you penned earlier that day, or accounts about your former life in a port town and the… interesting experiences you’ve had. 
“Interesting” is putting things lightly, he decides one night after you described how you chased off some unsavory pirates looking to rob your office of valuable medical supplies with a saw and a kitchen knife. And chased off? More like scared half to death.
He also learns that you’re musically gifted as well. He’s off pawning off your latest treasures while you wander around after gathering necessary supplies as per usual. You had agreed to meet back on the ship but he instead finds you standing in front of a music store, eyeing the instruments they have on display in the window.
“You play?” he asks as he approaches your side.
“Yeah,” you respond without taking your eyes off the window. “Was how I made money before I became a certified nurse. I’d take a gig every night at the local tavern and see how much money a crowd of drunk men was willing to throw at me.”
“And?”
“You’d be surprised. If there’s one thing pirates are good at, it’s getting drunk and throwing their earnings at the first pretty thing they see after months at sea.”
“Do you still want to play?”
You tear your eyes away from the display to meet his gaze for a second, before looking away again.
“... Part of me misses it. Just a bit.”
“...”
You leave the store with a skip in your step and the nicest violin they had for sale in your hands, courtesy of your captain. Music now drifts through the ship and sometimes you’ll perform what you’ve been practicing for him after dinner. He’ll clap along, but you notice he never sings or even hums along… 
You have company now as well. Long after you’ve weighed the anchor, you discover a stowaway onboard in the form of a black cat tearing through your food stockpiles. 
“You thief!” you exclaim as you lift it by the scruff and hold it up to eye level. It’s tiny… is it a kitten or just malnourished? It meows pitifully and licks the finger you extend after cautiously sniffing it, a little sliver of pink peeking out and scraping against your skin.
The poor thing is… kind of… cute.
“Oh? What’s this?” comes an irritatingly familiar voice behind you. You spin around to see the familiar visage of your captain smiling down at the cat in your hands with amusement. “A stowaway, eh?”
“I caught this little thief digging through our rations. Captain, what do you suggest we do?”
He raises his eyebrows in feigned shock. A hand comes up to stroke his chin as he thinks.
“A heinous crime,” he proclaims with drama dripping from his words. “A fitting punishment for a crime is needed.”
“Your verdict?”
“The cat can put itself to good use by staying aboard our ship and hunting down mice. Cats are also a symbol of good luck on ships, you know.”
Without further ado, he swoops in and snatches the cat out of your hands. It purrs loudly as he strokes its cheeks. 
Didn’t take much convincing for him to fold, you think as you scratch its chin. It closes its eyes and its ears twitch. 
“Shouldn’t we give it a name? Captain, any suggestions?”
A big mistake on your part.
“How does the name Doubloon sound?”
“... Doubloon?”
Aventurine sets the cat down and tosses a gold coin out there. The cat immediately goes running after it, green eyes wide and pupils dilated. It pounces on the coin and tussles with it, biting on the metal like its prey.
“Never mind. It’s fitting. Doubloon it is.”
It’s nice, he admits. He has a handy crewmate who is capable of all sorts of tasks and can deal with his antics, surprisingly. He decides to let you stay aboard indefinitely now. And the cat is a nice bonus too. 
Your captain isn’t half-bad company either. He’s still just as annoying as the day you met him, even more so if possible since you’ve gotten to know him. He’s an insufferable flirt, mainly toward you, but also toward others when he wants something. He’ll whisper teasing remarks in your (their) ears, all meant to get under your skin and have you (them) right where he wants. Teasing kisses on your (their) hands and cheeks are commonplace. (Who does he see when he kisses and charms those around him? You or them?) He has a raging gambling addiction, perfectly demonstrated by how he splurged on a poker table and a roulette wheel after only a few discovered treasures. (It doesn’t help how you keep losing every time he challenges you for a round or two.) He never opens up about his past even though you’ve all but spilled your life story to him, from childhood till now. He’ll do as he pleases without warning you beforehand, giving you a scare when he decides to bet his life at a casino or venture deeper than he should into a jungle on a hunch that “there’s more hidden treasure to be found just ahead!”
(You later scold him for his suicidal tendencies while bandaging his wounds with more force than necessary, reminding him that you can hold your own in a fight too! Newly acquired treasure sits just outside the door to the infirmary and he’s beaming all the while, so any hope of changing his mind fizzles out.)
But for all his shortcomings, he makes for a good captain. When confronted by a much larger pirate crew that thinks you’re easy pickings, he first pushes you to safety before diving in headfirst. He distributes treasure fairly and recognizes the value you hold as a medic, always ensuring you have more than enough allotted credits to restock on medicine at every port town. You never find yourself wanting for anything and your days are peaceful. You can sleep in as late as you want and you always have plenty to eat and drink. The ship’s supply of alcohol is always well-stocked with your favorites. You’re richer than ever before and money is of no worry to you now.
The ship also gets several upgrades. After every successful treasure hunt, she gets renovated and upgraded. More masts, an additional sail, a shiny new hull, until there was nothing left of its original structure. Aventurine now commands a true beauty of a ship, one fit for a pirate crew… and perhaps one a bit too big for her measly crew. Most of the ship’s space remains empty. But your quarters are spacious, even bigger than your old room on land. It’s filled with trinkets you’ve collected on your journey and fluffy pillows, and directly connected to the infirmary through a door to make things easy. Even a doctor on land would be envious of the conditions, with plenty of medicine stockpiled and clean from floor to ceiling.
“Shouldn’t we give her a name?” you ask as you set sail the day the last of her original foundation is stripped away. He hums and nods.
“You’re right. Got any ideas?”
“You’re the captain of this ship. You should be the one to decide, not me.”
Aventurine strokes his chin and thinks for a bit.
“How about the Lady Luck?”
“... Seriously? You picked something gambling related?”
He lazily shrugs and grins.
“I’m a gambling man through and through, darling. What else were you expecting from the likes of me?”
A single multicolored eye greets you as he tosses and flicks the poker chip he stole a while ago back and forth. The other eye is obscured by a bejeweled eyepatch and you’re the only one who knows the reason why. 
During your first clash against another pirate crew, Aventurine had shielded you from an attack and potentially saved your life. Unfortunately, he couldn’t move away in time and took a knife to the eye. You had worked tirelessly around the clock that night to save his vision, but you weren’t able to. It’s a regret you carry with you at all times now.
“You’re right,” he agrees. When he notices you staring at his eyepatch, he grins.
“Still thinking about old times? Let bygones be bygones now, (Name),” he jokes as he lifts the eyepatch up, revealing the cloudy  iris that indicates his vision loss. His words don’t have the intended effect though, and you wordlessly trail your finger down the scar cutting cleanly through the center of his brow bone to his cheekbone. He tenses a bit at the contact, but relaxes at your gentle touch after a few moments.
“Do you… ever regret what happened that night?”
“No,” he admits without any hesitation. “I may have lost my vision, but I saved my pretty nurse who stitched me back together and fretted over me afterward, and that’s enough to make a man do anything. And… well… for my eyes, let’s just say I’d rather gouge them out most of the time.”
“I won’t let you,” you state bluntly and it’s the way you say it that makes Aventurine laugh.
“Of course you wouldn’t, sweetheart. You’re my voice of reason.”
“But why? Do you not like them?”
Aventurine struggles to find the words for once and he makes a face like he’s tasted something bitter.
“… Not particularly,” he admits. There’s a scowl on his face. “They’re unnatural. Don’t tell me you’ve met another person with eyes like mine?”
“Well, that’s true, but-”
Venom creeps into his voice and his scowl deepens.
“There’s so many rumors swirling out there now. Haven’t you heard?”
“No,” you answer truthfully. Aventurine hopes you never hear any of the horrible rumors surrounding him.
You sigh and push his bangs out the way of his good eye.
“I think they’re quite pretty, actually.”
It’s supposed to be an innocent compliment. They really are pretty. Like the colors of a winter sunset, but more intense.
But to your surprise, your captain flinches at your touch and it sends a shock wave of guilt through you. He never shies away from your touch, instead always seeking it out like a spoiled house cat.
To make matters worse, he gets up and leaves. But before he does, you glimpse the expression in his eyes- guilty and defensive, like a wounded animal. The door to his quarters slams shut behind him and all you can do is stand there, frozen with shock.
“What pretty eyes. Tell me, do they shine in the dark?”
Aventurine leans against his bedroom door and quietly groans. He knows you meant it as a genuine compliment and that it was wrong of him to react the way he did, but he can’t help but wonder if you’d still think of him the same way if you knew about the story behind his eyes. Would you think of him any less? Aventurine doesn’t think he’d be able to bear it if he ever saw you look at him with hate and disgust. Or even worse, if you’d end up like everyone else, waiting for the day those eyes grew dull and lifeless.
… He’d gouge his eyes out and walk the plank if that ever happens.
He can’t stop himself from spiraling until he hears a knock at his door.
“Captain?”
He quietly laughs. You always did have a knack for showing up at the perfect time.
The door cracks open, and he sees you standing there with a worried and guilty expression. It makes him feel even worse. It’s not your fault. You wouldn’t have known because he never told you, and he was hoping it’d stay that way, but it looks like he won’t be able to take the coward’s way out on this one.
“I’m sorry,” you whisper. “I didn’t realize my words would affect you that much.”
“It’s alright. I know you meant it as a compliment. There’s nothing to apologize for.”
You narrow your eyes at him in confusion.
“Then why…?”
Aventurine lets out a resigned sigh and steps out onto the deck again, suddenly finding his quarters stuffy.
“It’s a long story. But would you like to hear?”
“I have plenty of time.”
Sitting side by side on the deck that night, he tells you everything about his past that he’s willing to reveal. Some parts have a clever twist that hides the truth while others have been outright omitted. But it’s the closest version of his backstory that he can share without coming clean, and he’s not ready for that- not yet, at least. 
“I’ve failed in this aspect of being captain,” he admits as silence blankets the air after his story. “I’ve been keeping too many secrets from you.”
“Captain, everyone’s got their own skeletons in their closets. I know and trust you well enough by now to understand that if you’ve been keeping something secret from me, it’s because you’re not ready to share it, and I respect that.”
You sigh and look up at the stars overhead. It’s a perfectly clear night with mild winds and calm seas.
“… It’s just that one day, I do wish you’d open up more. We’ve been with each other since day one and I’ve told you everything there is to know about me. It would be nice to know a bit more about you.”
He swallows nervously.
“And what if doing so makes me a bad person?”
You fix him with that stare that makes his spine tingle uncomfortably. It’s the look you give him whenever you suspect he’s lying during checkups and you’re prying for the real answer.
“… Well, we’re pirates after all. We’re not exactly good people, are we?”
He can’t help the laugh of relief that escapes him.
“Yeah, you’re right. We aren’t.”
Aventurine also likes to… spoil you, to put it lightly. As your finds become more valuable, the amount of credits he spends on you grows. Clothes are a common gift. Thin silks that feel like you’re wearing nothing, plush furs to drape yourself in, heavy down-stuffed winter coats for ventures up north, and frilly dresses that are a better fit for royalty in your eyes are all sent your way. It’s not an uncommon sight to return to the ship and see several men struggling under the weight of all his purchases while you were busy restocking. It gets to a point where you tell him to stop because your closet is overflowing, but he never listens. “It’s the least you deserve,” is what he always says. “Anything for my beloved nurse that has stuck with me through thick and thin!” At least half of the space in your formerly spacious quarters is now occupied by overflow from your closet.
You also get an upgrade to your uniform around this time. Before, it was whatever you had lying around, but now you have a dedicated set of dresses and pinafore aprons, as well as a nurse’s cap to top it all off. 
Cosmetics are also another common gift. He’ll constantly gift you lipsticks with the request to try them all on or expensive perfumes he knows you’ll like. He even gets you an elaborate vanity at one point to store everything. It’s a beautiful, heavy thing made from bronze and requires the strength of four men to carry. There’s a large mirror in the center with ornate molding surrounding it and two smaller ones flanking it. You’ll often see Aventurine leaning against the doorframe through one of them, watching you with a bemused look as you get ready in the morning. 
(That is, until you begin throwing pillows at his head and yelling at him to get out.)
But you begin to notice some strange things about your captain as time goes on. You’ll struggle with a chunk of meat during dinner while his unnaturally sharp teeth will tear through it with ease. They’re especially noticeable whenever he smiles, genuine or not. The large, sharp canines gleam under the sun. At one point, you asked if he purposefully sharpens them, partially as a joke, but also out of genuine curiosity. He had thrown his head back and laughed, but he didn’t answer your question. Sometimes, late at night when he thinks you’re asleep, you’ll peek out from behind the door and see the ghostly fire dancing around his blue fingertips. Aventurine’s outfits get progressively more gaudy and flashy as time goes on, and one thing he adds to his wardrobe rotation are metal nail guards. But even so, you notice his fingernails peeking out from underneath that are better described as claws. Heavy gold chokers and necklaces stacked on top of each other are an obligatory part of his look but on the rare occasion he decides to ditch the weight and opts for a high-collared linen shirt instead, you swear those are scales you see peeking out beneath the slipping collar after a long day. 
But you merely look the other way. As long as Aventurine remains a good captain, you don’t care who- or what- he is. 
It’s around this time you get the third addition to the crew as well. 
You’re docked at a pristine port town, which is a rarity to come by. White houses with blue roofs line the cliff sides. The streets are white too and the stone used to form them has been worn down and smoothed out by years of wear and tear. The warm air smells sweet and salty and vaguely of hay. In the town square, it transforms into something heavier and richer. The flowering trees blooming throughout make the air feel almost thick, while the persistent smell of sunbaked herbs and the local cuisine follow you everywhere from the restaurants and food stalls.
Aventurine is pawning off your latest finds at yet another Bonajade Exchange branch (??? Seriously, how many branches does this pawn shop have?) while you’re enjoying yourself in the town square, having already picked up on supplies and sent them back to the ship. The town comes to life at night. There’s a live band playing on a stage set up a few minutes prior with people dancing and drinks being passed around openly even though you’re in the middle of the town square and not in a tavern. You indulge a little, but eventually decide you’ve had enough for the night after a few too many men were too insistent on buying you a drink even after you’ve declined their offers. 
The rocking motion of the ship would make most people nauseous, especially someone that just had a few drinks, but you’ve long since gotten used to being at sea. Solid ground underfoot feels unfamiliar now and you let out a content sigh once you’re finally back in your quarters. You get settled in for the night as you wait for your captain to return and proudly show off his earnings from a night of gambling, like he always does. A candle is lit, filling your space with warmth and light as you resume reading a book that Aventurine had picked up for you earlier today.
You’re not sure how long you read for, but when you next look up, you’re shocked at how dark it is outside. A quick glance at your candle that’s almost burnt-out on the nightstand tells you it’s been at least a few hours- and yet, no sight or sound of your captain onboard. It’s silent, save for the sloshing of the waves against the hull outside and the crackling of the wick’s flame as it fights for survival. 
Shouldn’t he be back by now?
Curious and concerned, you go searching. Knowing him, he’s either drinking or gambling the night away. With some guidance from the locals, you scout out every tavern and casino in town for him. A quick peek into the windows or door is enough for you- there’s no sign of his blond hair or ostentatious pirate hat anywhere. As an added bonus, catcalls follow you everywhere and it’s enough to make you want to punch your captain in the face when you do see him. 
After a while of running around, you’ve just about had it. You’re exhausted, it’s late, and there’s still no sign of him. Where the hell could he have run off to now?
At your wit’s end now, you look at your surroundings and realize you’ve ended up at a university. You do remember seeing a map of the town the day you docked and recall a university in the northernmost reaches of the town limits. This is probably it. And from the looks of it, it’s not that big. Just a few buildings make up the entire campus.
One thing you notice walking around is a flight of stairs leading up the cliffside to what you assume to be an observatory at the top. It’s not off-limits, so you take your chances and ascend the stairs. It’s a clear night and you’re sure you can get a great view of the town from here. But as you climb, you hear voices drifting down. One of them sounds vaguely like… your captain? 
You pick up the pace. The stairs are steep and uneven in some areas. Some steps are wet from what you presume is rainwater and you almost fall on several occasions. (The things you do for this man! He should be thankful that you’re always there to ensure his sorry ass stays in line.)
You’re not sure what you were expecting once you reached the observatory, but it certainly wasn’t… this. You see your captain alright, but he’s pressed against the railing that’s the only barrier between him and a long fall down to the turbulent waters beneath. A man with violet hair who you’ve never seen before faces him with his back toward you, pressing a gun against Aventurine’s chest. Strangely enough, Aventurine doesn’t look terrified. In fact, he seems to take delight in the precarious balance his life hangs in, even going so far as to press the barrel of the gun closer to his chest with that same taunting grin on his face all the while. His cheeks are flushed, but whether that be from alcohol or… something else is up for debate. You’re already used to his suicidal tendencies, but just seeing his face after the events of today pisses you off even more. 
“Come on, doc. It’ll be worthwhile, I promise. You surely can’t be satisfied in a place like this, am I right?”
“Captain.”
That blissful look on his face vanishes in an instant, replaced by realization and pure fear. The other man turns around and golden eyes meet your ticked-off gaze. You brush the stranger aside and storm over to Aventurine, who looks more terrified of your wrath than any weapon. 
“So this is where you’ve been this entire time. Did you lose track of time or something? Because it’s been hours since you were supposed to return! I was running around town, looking like an idiot trying to find you.”
He holds his hands up like he can defend himself from the onslaught coming his way. You jab your finger at his chest and he pouts as he looks away shamefully. 
“(Name), at least hear me out first!” he whines. When you raise an eyebrow, he points over at the other man, who clicks his tongue and pointedly looks away. 
“I found ourselves a potential third crewmate and was trying to convince him to join! But it doesn’t seem to be working… Care to try your hand?”
“That’s just another way of saying you’re pawning off the hard work to me!” you complain. And yet you humor his demands anyway.
“You are?” 
He hmphs and rolls his eyes. Already, he pisses you off. 
“Dr. Veritas Ratio, teacher and scholar. And you are?”
“Nurse (Name), working aboard the Lady Luck under the command of our Captain Aventurine.”
“... Said captain is on the verge of collapsing from alcohol poisoning behind you.”
It’s true. He’s clinging to the railing for dear life, the drinks from earlier catching up to him and hitting like a sledgehammer, you imagine. 
“Aeons, how much did you drink earlier?” you grumble as you hoist one arm over your shoulder and awkwardly drag him along. He merely hums and buries his nose into your hair, tripping over his two feet as he attempts to walk. 
“Mm… You smell nice, (Name). Like the new perfume I got you… hehe…”
“Answer the question, Captain.”
He opts to press his nose into your hair and inhale.
“Oh, not that much. Just… y’know… a couple tankards of beer.”
Meaning that he’s definitely had at least five of them and counting.
“… I’ve heard everything I needed to hear.”
Thankfully, Dr. Ratio seems to be adept at reading social cues and assists you with helping him down the stairs, albeit slowly and awkwardly. You invite him onto the ship and after taking a look around the medical quarters, he makes himself comfortable at your desk. He seems quite pleased, so you take it as some sort of roundabout compliment as you busy yourself with getting your captain to bed. You flip Aventurine over into the recovery position, who flops around aimlessly like a rag doll. Soon enough, you hear him faintly snoring. When you return, Dr. Ratio has taken one of the books shelved on your desk and began thumbing through it. 
“You have medical knowledge?” you ask once the door behind you is shut. He barely looks up from the book and continues flipping through its pages. 
“I have the title of ‘doctor’ for a reason.”
A doctor. An actual doctor. One step above you, a nurse. He had access to an education far out of your reach, and you had fought tooth and nail for yours. 
You can’t help but feel the first pangs of jealousy sink their claws into you and you avert your eyes, humiliated. What purpose would you have aboard the ship should he join as a doctor? What’s stopping your captain from deciding the man in front of you can do everything you can plus more and throwing you off the ship? Granted, any medical professional, doctor or not, is highly sought-after on pirate ships and you believe your captain is above tossing you aside after you’ve already proven your loyalty to him. But the knowledge that he will always be regarded as one step above you, seen as more valuable, is enough to leave a bitter taste in your mouth. 
“Overthinking things, are we?”
He meets your gaze with a sharp look of his own.
“Don’t give me that look. Only a fool who wallows in their own ignorance would do such a thing.”
You hadn’t realized you were glaring at him until now.
“Sorry,” you half-heartedly apologize, taking a deep breath to relieve the tight ball of anger in your chest. You just met this man; you know it’s not right to be pissed at him over something like this, but you can’t help it. You massage your temples and gesture for him to continue. 
“I am well aware that you are the longtime nurse aboard this ship, and while I have no doubt you’re just as ignorant as the other fools who proclaim themselves to be intelligent and respected in their fields-“
Is he insulting me to my face?!
“- I will acknowledge that you are at least deserving of your title for keeping you and this ship’s captain alive all this time. A commendable feat considering your lack of a higher education. I thus have no intention of stripping you of your role.”
… Well, that’s your biggest concern addressed. Although, was the remark about your lack of education really necessary?
Now no longer worrying about whether or not you’d find yourself back at that place you swore to leave behind, you relax.
“Then what is your intention?”
He huffs and dramatically snaps the book shut.
“I am first and foremost an educator! My mission is to spread knowledge across the world until ignorance is a cured disease. And yet, the board of trustees at the university are doing everything they can to get me to stay. What a pointless endeavor!”
You cast a doubtful glance at him.
“... But you’re a professor. A fresh batch of students is a fresh batch of minds to educate. Isn’t academia where you thrive?”
Dr. Ratio huffs, like he’s having to explain something repeatedly to a child that doesn’t understand. 
“Zero points! How can I possibly be content with my situation, knowing there’s a whole world of ignorance out there just waiting to be fixed? Besides, we don’t get many applicants per year.”
“Would you like a way out then?”
After a beat of silence, he sets your book down and turns to face you fully for the first time that night. You take in his ruby-rimmed golden eyes, the color of the sunset a few hours ago, that hold the weight of a genius’s expectations behind them. 
“Are you offering me a position aboard the ship?”
“That depends. What skills do you have?”
He puffs his chest out proudly.
“I have eight doctorates in the fields of biology, medicine, natural theology, philosophy, physics, mathematics, engineering… oh, and astronomy. You would be hard-pressed to not glean some value.”
That last part catches your attention.
“Astronomy, you say?”
We are in need of a dedicated navigator… Aventurine can’t be at the helm 24/7.
You turn your attention back to Dr. Ratio, who meets your gaze with a tilt of his head and a raised brow.
“Something on your mind?”
“Have you ever tried your hand at being a ship’s navigator?”
He doesn’t look surprised at your question. It’s like he was anticipating it.
“I can’t say I have,” he admits. “But with my knowledge, it should be child’s play.”
“Don’t say that about something you’ve never tried,” you caution. “If you’re really interested, meet me back here at the docks this time tomorrow night. We’ll see how you do.”
The next night, he’s waiting at the docks with several bags lying beside him. Hm, he must’ve packed all his belongings for a life at sea now. Aventurine whistles at him as you lead him aboard.
“Looks like you’ve made up your mind already, doc. Told you so.”
If looks could kill, Aventurine would be at the bottom of the sea right now. 
Once out on the deck, you hand him a sailing chart. Without a hitch, he dives right in. His spyglass is aimed at the sky as he examines the stars and their positions. With your help in hoisting the sails and Aventurine in steering the ship toward the right direction, you’re on track to your next destination.
“Not bad,” you praise. “You’ll need to learn how to steer the ship and how to hoist the sails, but you can learn that in due time.”
“That settles it then, I suppose,” comes Aventurine’s voice from behind. The soft glow of a tea candle flickering within a lantern fills the space as he steps into view.
“Welcome aboard, Ratio.”
He proves to be quite a skilled navigator, and you’re thankful you managed to snatch him up before any other pirate crew could. Even without a sailing chart or in stormy weather, he still manages to ensure you don’t veer off course. It’s truly remarkable, really, as even sailing from north to south is hardly a challenge for him.
He settles into the empty room next door to your quarters. Bookshelves line the walls from floor to ceiling, with several more stacked on his desk and bed. It perpetually smells like clean linens and chalk from the stash he burns through every week solving whatever problem piques his interest, written out on the rolling blackboard by the windows- or through hurling them at your captain with terrifying strength and speed. Sometimes, you’ll stop and stare at the board for a bit, only to give up after realizing you can’t understand a lick of it. It’s usually something physics or math related. If he’s in the room as well, he’ll try explaining it to you, but it all ends up flying over your head anyway. 
Soon enough, he lets you call him by his first name without the title out in front- a privilege not even your captain has. When not found on the deck, he can either be found reading and solving problems in his quarters, or hovering by your side.
“Rum mixed with… lime juice?”
You’re in the kitchen, surrounded by supplies. A new shipment of rum and citruses sits in the corner and you’re going through them, preparing the crew’s rations of alcohol.
You nod and toss the rinds over your shoulder into the garbage.
“Stagnant water on ships is a gold mine for diseases and pests. Alcohol is usually a safer alternative, and while the captain and I painstakingly ensure the water onboard is safe to drink…”
You shrug and take an experimental sip of the mixture. The strong burn of alcohol all but scorches your throat on the way down, but it’s a sensation you’ve long grown accustomed to, even liking it by now. The addition of lime makes you purse your lips and raise your brows approvingly. It would be even better with some sugar but alas, it’s a very costly material to transport, even by Aventurine’s standards.
“I suppose there are some vices that just can’t be shaken, like a pirate’s love for alcohol. The lime also prevents scurvy. I bet they don’t teach you this in med school, do they?”
Veritas begrudgingly shakes his head.
“We’re taught about the dangers of scurvy and waterborne disease obviously, but never resort to such… crude solutions.”
You laugh and push a glass toward him.
“Well, this is your life now, and you chose it. Better get used to how things are done around here.”
“I’m not saying I have anything against your methods, as crude as they may be,” he scoffs as he eyes the drink in front of him. You think you see a hint of nervousness in his eyes and smirk. Perhaps it’s Aventurine’s influence rubbing off onto you, but you spot a perfect opportunity to tease him.
“Drink up. Cheers,” you say, raising your glass in a toast. “It’s not half-bad, I promise.”
He lifts the glass to his lips and takes a hesitant sip before sputtering dramatically, face scrunched up in an amusing expression of disgust. You all but cackle at his reaction and down half your glass in one fell swoop.
“Liar,” is all he can manage out as he chugs water to chase away the burn of the drink.
“You’ll be singing the same tune I am in just a few months’ time. Just wait and see, I guarantee it.”
“Or that’s just your alcoholic tendencies speaking.”
“Never claimed I wasn’t one,” you respond with an eye roll as you finish the last bit of your drink. He looks at you with an expression of faux disgust as you leave, then looks down at his drink again as soon as the door closes. With a sudden burst of effort, he downs all of it. Veritas feels like he’s about to start breathing fire, but he holds it in for a few seconds before shakily exhaling.
“… It’s passable, I suppose. Five points.”
It’s some time after this that you welcome your fourth member aboard.
You’re docked at the only port to a mining town that, to your eyes, is on the verge of becoming a ghost town. It’s not winter yet, so the town hasn’t completely frozen over and snowed in (which is common this far north) but it’s still so bitingly cold. Supposedly, this is the warmest it gets year-round, but you still find yourself shivering underneath all your layers as you pace back and forth to prevent your limbs from turning into icicles. Even Aventurine, who likes to drink and gamble the day away after docking, keeps things on land as short as possible before running back to the ship to warm up. (Not like there are any taverns or casinos in a place this miserable anyway.)
You’re only here because there’s a severe storm blocking your way and this was the only port that you could dock at. All others, including the one you had left, were too far away to even consider rerouting to. Aventurine is absolutely miserable at the situation and you’re no better. Veritas is probably the worst of you three, being even more snippy than usual and holing up in his quarters. 
One thing you notice is the lack of trees. According to the locals, severe runoff from mining activities has led to trees spontaneously igniting from the industrial chemicals in the soil, leaving only burnt sticks behind. It’s quite sad, you think. The people here can’t even appreciate nature’s beauty. 
Another thing you noticed as soon as you docked are the heavy respirators the residents wear. There are newer models on the market that are lighter, smaller, and just plain better, but the ones you see look like metal helmets from times of war rather than medical devices. They’re old, archaic and clunky. They cover the entire face and you can hear every labored inhale and exhale through the little grate in front of the mouthpiece. 
It’s also so, so gray and dreary. A thick smog blankets the town thanks to the smokestack belching chemicals into the air. There’s a persistent acrid stench sticking to your clothes and skin and hair that no matter how hard you scrub, just won’t go away. Your throat feels scratchy and you’re always coughing and soon enough, you’re forced to don the same respirator everyone else does. You’re uncomfortably hot under the full face of metal and your neck is sore from its weight, while the vision in your left eye is always tinged red because of the glass used for the lens. You only wear it when you have to leave the ship, which is almost never. Aventurine laughed at how stupid you looked at first but before long, he was subjected to the same miserable fate as you.
“I can’t wait till we finally leave this place.”
“Tell me about it.”
On the day before you’re scheduled to finally depart, you decide to explore a bit further than you usually do. You hitch a ride with a resident past the outskirts of the town to the residential area. The pollution out here is significantly less, but still dangerously high by all standards. There’s actually vegetation out here! (Sparse blades of grass that haven’t been cut in ages and come up to your kneecaps. The soil is strangely wet and sticky and you wince after seeing the clumps of mud sticking to your shoes, even more so after recalling the extensive soil pollution plaguing the town.) Rows of identical concrete blocks are stacked alongside each other, meant to be bare-bones apartments. Faded slogans are painted onto the sides of them (“peace to the world!” is a common one you see) and there are small playgrounds out in front situated here and there.
It’s where you also find a girl around your age. She sits with her back to you as she hunches over something. It’s the bits of white hair peeking out from under the respirator that get your attention. You nudge the resident you’re walking alongside and look over at her.
“Who’s she?”
“Ah, that’s little Jelena. Though, she prefers to be called Topaz these days. Don’t ask me why.”
“What’s she working on?”
“Who knows? Beats me. All I know is she’s always mumbling something about leaving this place. Utter foolishness, if you ask me. Once you’re here, you’re never getting out.”
You stay put in your tracks examining her. She doesn’t seem to have noticed you, continuing with whatever she’s working on. The resident looks at you strangely but after a rushed and awkward wave goodbye, leaves.
“... Miss Topaz?”
She jolts and looks over her shoulder at you. Her respirator obscures her face but her posture is guarded and defensive. You can’t blame her.
“Who’re you? And how do you know my name?”
“A resident passing by told me.”
She takes a quick glance at you from head to toe.
“You’re not from here, are you?”
You laugh, hoping to dispel the tension and take a step forward. She looks a bit nervous, but hasn’t left yet. Good.
“What gave it away?”
“Nobody here has clothes that nice and clean. Or hair that shiny and well-maintained.”
She tugs on her own rags and choppy hair for emphasis. Sensing an opportunity, you sit down next to her and take your scarf off, wrapping it around her. Topaz jolts but stills when she feels how soft the material is. With a sudden effort, she yanks the respirator off her head and tosses it aside carelessly to bury her face further into the scarf.. The underlayer of her hair is a shockingly bright red. You match her actions and toss yours aside too. The acrid smell of polluted air hits your nose but you maintain a pleasant smile even though you want to scrunch your nose up and start coughing.  
“Keep it,” you say, patting her shoulders. She rolls the scarf fringe around between her fingers, marveling at how thick the yarn is and how it doesn’t fray immediately. “I have more clothes than I know what to do with.”
Topaz lets the scarf fall from her fingers and looks up at you behind untrimmed bangs.  
“... Who are you?”
She’s curious now. An enigmatic smile graces your face. 
“Would you like to know?”
A nod. 
“Nurse (Name), serving the Lady Luck, a vessel operated under the command of our pirate captain Aventurine.”
“... Pirates?”
Your gaze drifts to her workbook. There’s still questions in her eyes but she turns toward you a bit more to give you a better glance at what she’s working on, sensing your curiosity. A chart filled with lots of numbers and scribbled calculations all around it. 
“What’re you working on?”
“Accounting. I’m studying hard to get out of here. Everyone says I shouldn’t bother and just settle down with a husband already, but I have my sights set on something far greater than what this life can give me.”
You sympathetically hum and nod. There’s a loud squeak and something falls into your lap out of nowhere. It’s a… piglet?? Tiny for one as well. It squeals and flails around a bit in your lap until Topaz swoops in and lifts it up.
“Numby! Stop that!”
It squeals some more as Topaz continues lecturing it. You watch the exchange with a mix of confusion and concern for Topaz’s life.
“Is this… your pet?”
“Hm? Oh, yeah. This is Numby. They’re not just my pet though! They can accurately sense where riches are located and over the years, have even learned how to perform jobs related to security, debt collection, and actuarial sciences!”
The expression on your face must speak for yourself because she laughs and tosses you a gold coin. Numby squeals and flails in her arms, trying to go after it, but Topaz doesn’t budge. 
“Don’t believe me? Toss this coin out there and watch Numby go after it.”
You catch the coin deftly. Topaz covers Numby’s eyes and hands you a pocket knife. You raise an eyebrow.
“Go bury it. Give Numby a challenge. Not like it really is one, but make them jump over a hurdle or two.”
“You can use weapons?”
“Course I can.”
She looks up at the perpetually gray sky and the plumes of pollution being spewed out. 
“There’s not a lot of people here, but life is hard and sometimes people try to take out their frustrations on those around them. Crime is a lot more rampant than you’d expect in a place like this, and unless you want to be robbed completely defenseless, it’s a given to always have something on you.”
You feel like your lucky stars have aligned and all the Aeons themselves are smiling down on you. By Aventurine’s luck, this girl is everything you need all in one package! You feel like this is hardly real. 
“What weapons can you use?”
She shrugs. “Knives, mostly. They’re the most accessible around here. But I have experience with guns too. Swords as well. Nabbed them off the drunken sailors a while back to protect myself and Numby against some idiots who had the really bright idea to turn them into bacon.”
… You feel like you’re ascending right now. Everything is aligning exactly the way you need them to. 
“Stolen a few times before, eh? Looks like you’ve already got experience in piracy.”
She scowls at you and you take that as your cue to bury the coin. You choose a location that’s a few apartment blocks down from hers. The knife sinks easily into the sticky, polluted soil as you dig a little hole before burying the coin. You avoid getting any dirt on your hands, not wanting to even think about what the contamination could and would do to your skin…
“Finished,” you call out as you make your way back to her. Topaz lifts her hand from Numby’s eyes and with a slap to the rear, sends the piglet running. They run faster than you expected them to with their stubby legs and soon disappear from sight.
“They’ll be waiting for us where the treasure is. But in the meanwhile, we can walk and talk.”
The two of you begin walking side by side, this time with less tension in the air.
“What a drag it is being pressured to settle for less,” you empathize, shifting the conversation back to the earlier topic. “What do you want to be?”
“A businesswoman of sorts, climbing up the ladder until I’m sitting at the top. Then no one can tell me what to do.” Even as she walks, she still continues to work, her pencil flying across the page as she performs calculations faster than you can keep up with. 
You raise your eyebrows and let out an “ohhhhhhh” in response. A golden opportunity has presented itself. 
“Well, what do you want in life then?”
“... I suppose it’s to solve problems. There’s many of them that exist in this world and I like solving them. It makes me feel nice, knowing I’m doing something to improve people’s lives.”
“Why not a teacher or something similar then? You’re quite good at math, after all.”
She shakes her head. “Not enough jobs in education around here. The nearest school is in the neighboring town, which is over half an hour away. The nearest university is several hours away in the city. There’s no demand for education in these parts, so there’s no supply of jobs and the current positions are occupied by people who’d rather die than resign.”
She flips to the next page and dives right in. 
“But companies are always hiring, right? I heard from the sailors down at the dock that there’s a few that are rapidly growing and are in need of people. So that’s why I want to become a businesswoman. Because it’s the fastest way to achieve what I want- happiness. And that’s how a job should be.”
You drum your fingers along your arm excitedly and lean forward with a conspiratorial look on your face. Drawn in by your expression, Topaz can’t help but lean in a bit too. 
“What if I said that although I can’t land you a job at a big company, I can guarantee you riches and a chance to explore the world? You can also finally escape those annoying aunties who keep pestering you about marriage and sending men your way who you can’t even bear to look at,” you whisper, temptation and promise dripping from every word. 
Her pencil stills, she comes to a halt, and she looks at you fully for the first time. Her eyes are a brilliant purple with flecks of blue and yellow. Despite the harsh conditions surrounding her, they still retain plenty of life. Quite different from Aventurine, you think. Makes you wonder what he went through to have the life sucked out of his eyes. 
But soon enough, there’s a scowl back on her face and she begins walking again. 
“Money is a means, not an end. I may be poor, but I’m not studying out of greed. Work should make you happy. If that’s all there is to offer, then I won’t be happy and I can’t have that happening.”
“How does solving long-buried mysteries sound? It should scratch that problem-solving itch of yours.”
She hesitates and you can tell she’s starting to seriously consider your offer. You just have to keep pushing and choosing your words carefully. 
“I don’t see how piracy helps anyone though,” she says stubbornly and you mentally sigh. She really wants to know what she’s getting herself into, huh? But that’s already two of her three needs you’ve got checked off and you already have a counterargument prepared for this. 
“We only search for and discover buried treasure that no one has laid claim to and is free game for all interested pirates,” you calmly respond. “None of that town-looting business you might hear about from the sailors down at the dock. And should you wish to donate your share of money earned to philanthropic organizations or invest it elsewhere… you’re more than welcome to. We won’t stop you.”
From the look on her face, victory has already been secured. And yet, she looks uncertain. Unsure.
“But… Why me? Why little Jelena from this run-down mining town when there are so many smart, talented people out there waiting to be discovered?”
There’s a loud squeal up ahead and Numby is jumping up and down in front of the spot you had buried the coin. Topaz unearths it with the knife and pulls out the dirt-stained coin. So she was right. Even better. 
You reach your hand out to her, just like how you did when you made your offer to Aventurine and Veritas.
“Why, it’s simple. We both get what we want. You get a ticket out of here and a hefty share of our riches, while we get a capable bookkeeper who prevents our captain from gambling away too much money, plus a master gunner who’ll defend the ship from foes.”
Your hand remains extended. She stares at it, then at you disbelievingly.
“I…”
You wave the gold coin you plucked out of her gloved hands without her noticing and wave it in front of her face. 
“Every investment has its risks, right? I suppose it’s natural to want to pick the one that has the least risk involved when you’re putting down something as important and uncertain as your future as collateral. But you’re still young with plenty of time left and dreams unfulfilled. If you play it safe, you won’t be able to make a killing later on in life. My days are freer now. All of us are. And I know that freedom to do as you please is what’ll bring you that happiness you so desire.”
Silence greets you. You swallow nervously. (You hope she didn’t see it.) You’re no businessperson, but you know an opportunity when you see it. And this is one you absolutely cannot let slip through your fingers. You’re gripping the coin as tight as you can and your hands are cold and clammy beneath your gloves. 
Her shoulders begin to shake. Your hand twitches and you think you’ve somehow upset her until she begins to laugh heartily. It’s loud and free, echoing off the walls of the apartment blocks. It’s the prettiest sound you’ve heard in this whole town. 
“Wow, talk about a win-win situation! Just the way I like to go about doing business. Nurse (Name), I’ll be under your care going forward!”
She whistles for Numby, who comes running over, oinking. 
“... You’re not bringing anything else with you? We don’t have to leave immediately, you know. We still got a whole day before we leave.”
Topaz shakes her head and lifts Numby onto her shoulders. 
“Nothing worth bringing along. Besides, what’s a better way to signify a fresh start in life by leaving everything behind?”
“Not saying goodbye either?”
Her enthusiastic demeanor fades to something more solemn and her pace slows.
“... No one here supports my dreams. If they didn’t support me from the very start, they don’t deserve to see me at my proudest.”
You hitch a ride back to the docks with another resident. On the way back, Topaz nudges you in the side.
“Are you sure you aren’t a businessperson? That was a very solid offer you drafted and presented to me back there. I couldn’t have done much better myself. You’ve even got the silver tongue for success as well. Perhaps an ambassador of sorts, at the very least?”
You laugh and brush aside her compliments.
“I’m truly flattered, but I really am just a nurse onboard… oh. Right.”
“... Is something the matter?”
“It’s just… I never told our Captain that a fourth member might be joining us. Ah… he’s in for quite the surprise when we get back to the docks.”
In my defense, it’s not like I could’ve told him anyway while I was so far away from our ship… 
Her face falls. Wait, you can’t have this happening already! Not when you just convinced her to join!
“I’ll vouch for you,” you quickly reassure. “He may be annoying and difficult to work with, but he’s not unreasonable. Besides, I’ve been a crewmate for the longest. If there’s anyone he’s going to listen to, it’s me.”
You find Aventurine lounging around in his quarters when you return. He gets up to welcome you back with an eager grin and an embrace, but pauses when he sees Topaz and Numby behind you.
“Oh? Who’s this?”
You plant yourself between them.
“Topaz, meet Captain Aventurine. You’ll be working under him from this day forward.”
As per his usual nature, he merely laughs and extends his hand. Topaz firmly grasps and shakes it. 
“A new recruit,” he chuckles. “Welcome aboard the Lady Luck then. We could always use some more helping hands around here. (Name), why don’t you go show her around the ship?”
But there’s a look in his eyes that follows you into the late hours of the night, through showing her the layout of the ship and introducing her to Veritas who looked as if he couldn’t care less, and the extravagant dinner to celebrate her arrival.
You and I need to talk.
It’s only after everyone has gone to sleep that Aventurine seeks you out. Topaz is sleeping soundly in your bed and you’re leaning against the doorframe outside, waiting for him. When he does appear, the usual carefree smirk is gone, instead replaced by a more serious expression.
“Really? A new crewmate without my-”
You violently shush him.
“She’s sleeping!” you hiss. He rolls his eyes but listens all the same.
“... I’m not saying I’m doubting your ability to seek out talented people,” he begins, voice a whisper this time. “But what if she betrays us? And we’ve been just fine so far with the three of us. What can she do that we can’t?”
You roll your eyes.
“Aventurine-”
“Kakavasha.”
“What?”
His intense gaze doesn’t waver. Ghost fire sprouts from his fingertips and dances wildly around him. A wisp lands on your hand. It’s warm, pleasantly so. 
“Kakavasha. That’s my real name. Call me that, but only when we’re alone.”
“... Really? You decide to finally open up in the middle of an argument?” you grumble. “There’s a time and place for everything, y’know…”
He blinks at you innocently and you resist the urge to push him overboard. Instead, you settle for coughing and swatting the wisp of ghost fire away from you.
“... As I was saying, Captain Kakavasha, she won’t betray us.”
“A bold statement to make with such confidence. How can you say for certain?”
“Kakavasha, this girl came from nothing. You saw the state of town she grew up in. No friends, no connections, no way out. But we gave her the escape she’s been looking for. She won’t sell us out, not while she’s indebted to us.”
You hear a sudden noise behind the door and freeze. It’s silent for several more agonizing moments until you finally relax. She probably just shifted around in her sleep. You really hope she didn’t wake up or hear any of that…
“But if she decides to leave of her own accord to chase her dream further, then who are we to stop her? Of course, even if she tries to turn us in, the authorities won’t be able to catch us,” you joke, trying to ease his fears. 
Aventurine hums. He doesn’t look moved.
“So? What can she do that we can’t?”
… But he doesn’t press the prior topic any further so you assume it’s ok for now.
You beam and hold out the workbook you swiped off her earlier. 
“Captain, we’ll have a dedicated accountant on board now! Just look at this. I saw her complete this entire page in no more than five minutes! Not only is she fast, but she’s accurate! Here, check for yourself if you don’t believe me.”
Aventurine takes it and examines it with an air of disinterest surrounding him. He glances at it for a few seconds before tossing it back.
“Yeah, it’s all correct.”
“But that’s not all!” you continue. “Her little pet that’s always following her? Apparently, they’re skilled in security, debt collection, and actuarial sciences!”
The silence that follows your statement speaks for itself.
“... Don’t look at me like that.”
“Are you drunk right now, (Name)?”
“Hey!” you exclaim indignantly, before remembering that Topaz is still asleep. “I am not! I’ll admit, I was just quoting her claims but her pet is really good at detecting treasure. I buried a gold coin and they found it with no trouble. Kakavasha, imagine how useful they would be.”
“Pigs are a symbol of good luck aboard a ship…” he mumbles to himself and it’s a sign you’re a step closer to convincing him.
“... Should we introduce her to Jade?” you ask. Aventurine looks at you like you’re insane. Then, as if considering your offer, looks at your door as if seeing through it to the girl sleeping in your bed.
“I know you’re good at math and business too, but wouldn’t it be nice to have someone else equally as skilled on board? With a bit of refinement from Jade, she’ll be just as qualified as any other licensed professional out there,” you plead.
He shakes his head. “If you want me to be the bookkeeper as well, I can do that no problem. If you’re adamant about her joining, you’ll have to try harder than that.”
“You’re a pain in the ass.”
“Your pain in the ass, sweetheart.”
“Shut up and don’t call me that, especially right now,” you growl. He merely hums and smiles, his expression strangely cat-like. He wants to make things difficult for you? Fine. Time to bring out the big guns then.
“She’s skilled with weapons.”
“...”
“...”
“How skilled? And with what types?”
Checkmate. 
“Knives, mostly. But she has experience with guns and swords too.”
You can practically see the gears turning in his head and hear his thoughts. He must be thinking about the weapons piled away in the armory with no one skilled enough to use them. With Topaz on board, they’d be put to good use for once- and after enough training from her, there was nothing the crew would fear.
“... Of course, I still have to personally see what she’s capable of.”
He glances at the clock hanging above his dresser mirror. 
“I’ll see to it tomorrow morning. Tell her to meet me on the deck first thing after waking up. I’ll be testing her aim and accuracy, among other factors.”
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You’re woken up the next morning by the sound of gunshots. Several of them. Thinking you’re under attack, you scramble to your feet and stumble onto the deck only to see Topaz shooting some bottles lined up on the railing- and she’s hitting every one of them. 
Aventurine takes in the sight of you in your pajamas and unbrushed hair. A snort escapes him. 
“Good morning, my lovely nurse. Did you sleep well?”
… The nerve of this man. Then again, he did warn you the night before, so it’s not like you can blame him for your own forgetfulness. 
He stops you before you can storm off though, beckoning Topaz over.
“Congratulations,” he says while clapping. “Thanks to my beloved’s recommendation and your mastery over weapons, I hereby welcome you aboard the ship as our master gunner, Topaz.”
She excitedly shakes his hand before enveloping you in a bone-crushingly tight hug.
“Thank you! I promise I won’t let you down. I’ll pay you back double- no, triple the amount of investment you’ve put in me. And I always deliver on my promises!”
Your thoughts are a whirlwind as you watch her run down to where your quarters are.
… But I never saw it as you owing me?
Aventurine’s light laughter pulls you out of your thoughts. You scowl at him as he stops before you, gently combing out the tangles in your bedhead with his fingers.
“Stop referring to me by those pet names. People are going to get the wrong idea about us.”
“Oh? I wouldn’t mind that one bit.”
“Veritas has already been giving me strange looks whenever he sees us two together. Add Jele- Topaz into the mix and I don’t think I’ll be able to handle it.”
“Handle what? Sweetheart, it’s just the four of us out on the open sea!”
He spins you around in his arms and you let yourself be dragged along.
“That’s exactly what I mean! And don’t ‘sweetheart’ me!”
“Sure, sure. Whatever you say, sweetheart.”
“You-!”
Topaz settles into the room across the hall from yours. While the space is initially barren, it quickly gets filled up thanks to you. She raids your overflowing wardrobe and takes whatever interests her periodically and half the time, you don’t even realize what she stole thanks to your captain constantly spoiling you. Cosmetics are another common victim of her theft, but it’s more noticeable, especially if it’s a perfume. Books that you’ve finished are piled up in her room and she’ll often come to you with questions about your thoughts after she’s finished reading one. Numby has their own little bed at the foot of hers and you’ll frequently see them chasing Doubloon around the deck. 
It seems that Topaz is good at everything and anything she sets her mind to, because she becomes frighteningly skilled with weapons in a short period of time. Every day, she holds lessons teaching you all how to use an array of weapons, and she’s quite the skilled teacher too. But when class isn’t in session, she can often be found out on the main deck during a sunny day, humming a tune to herself as she cleans out the many pricey pistols and rifles you’ve plundered over the course of your journeys. Or by your side, but that’s a given by now. 
She also gets… seasick. Rather easily too. It’s her one fatal weakness. She gets used to it over time, but if the seas are rougher than usual, it’s guaranteed that you’ll find her hurling into the ocean, face pale and hair sticking to her forehead. And sometimes, it’ll still happen even when the seas are calm! It gets to the point where she’s so fed up she goes to Aventurine himself and demands answers. But he merely tips his head back and laughs.
“That’s the Lady Luck for you! She’s a fickle one like her namesake. Sometimes, she’ll try and drown you just for spite. She keeps even me on my toes at all times and I’m her captain. Isn’t that right?”
Aventurine pats the shiny wooden helm. As if responding to him, she creaks and rolls precariously even though the waves are calm. 
The four of you now are a complete crew. Incredibly small by all means, but a crew that operates smoothly like a well-oiled machine and one to be feared. 
As there’s so few of you on board, all of you have to double down, or even triple down, on roles. Veritas is simultaneously the boatswain and navigator, while Topaz is master gunner and master at arms while also being the bookkeeper. You’re “the ship’s beloved nurse”, as so lovingly referred to by Aventurine, while also being the quartermaster. Smaller roles such as cooking and carpentry are handled on a day by day basis and whoever’s available at the moment- although it usually ends up being you after Numby ran amok in the kitchen and almost burnt the ship down.
Guess being second in command is the bare minimum you deserve after being with him the longest among everyone on board. Although, there’s no real sense of hierarchy when there’s only four of you in total… 
Unlike other pirate captains out there, he wasn’t a rich man or a legitimate captain or even a high-ranking officer on a private vessel before becoming captain. Rather, there’s almost nothing known about him and it’s what makes others regard him with suspicion. How can a man who started off with nothing sail the seas with such ease, outshining even those who were born with a silver spoon in their mouths? 
But it’s all forgotten about in the face of his achievements- always going where no man has dared gone before and finding treasures beyond a pirate’s wildest imagination, as well as discovering several legendary treasures that have been lost for generations. Sea monsters that have been terrorizing ships for years meet their watery demise by your hand with Topaz leading the fray. Even the harshest of seas and weathering three days and nights with little sleep and food isn’t enough to shake your spirits. Mythical beasts meet death one after another and it’s around after the third creature slayed- a kraken whose single tentacle was longer than your ship measured from prow to stern, strong enough to crush her hull into splinters with ease- that you know you’ve made a name for yourselves. Whispers follow you everywhere you go on land and you’ll always hear dramatized retellings of your battles and treasures discovered while passing by taverns. 
The bounty on your heads also increases with each treasure you discover. It wasn’t until the four of you banded together that wanted posters started being put out. The amounts offered started off small at first, but after more and more valuable treasures were discovered, the number of zeros at the end keeps increasing until it’s the staggering number it is today. It becomes a point of pride, seeing how quickly the amount offered spikes with each town you stop at and you’ll have a good laugh over it, especially if the authorities think they’re fast enough to arrest you. You’ll take your sweet time fleeing as officials scurry after you like drunken idiots with two left feet- and giving them a fair share of trouble too. By the time they catch up with you at the port, you’re already long gone with a stash of stolen weapons and alcohol onboard- and a horrifyingly long tab under their name at the local tavern.
All the while having a crew of only three under Aventurine’s command. Truly a once-in-a-lifetime kind of pirate captain.
As word spreads from port to port about his unbelievable luck in finding treasure, his reputation grows and so does the number of people looking to join his crew. At every port, he welcomes anyone wishing to join with open arms. But not everyone is worthy of joining. You secretly put every applicant through a series of tests to see if they’re qualified including, but not limited to: seeing what skills they have to offer that you don’t possess already, if they can handle Ratio’s admittedly hardass personality at times, if they can satisfactorily perform the jobs of upwards of three people, as well as their motives among others. 
And of course, dealing with Aventurine. He’s in a category of his own. 
As expected, none of them last more than an hour. Shame. More hands on deck would always be appreciated.
All of this leads to your reputation as a small but tight-knit crew that would defend each other to the death. Regardless of the size or might of the ship that dares to challenge you, you always emerge victorious. Whether it be down to dumb luck or the collective desire to protect home, no one makes it out alive after encountering you. It’s enough to tell other pirate crews to steer clear, especially after you had considerably roughed up other crews more than twice your size. After the first few encounters that resulted in many dead pirates, you all decide to raise a red flag. It warns others that your crew will refuse to spare the lives of any opponent that comes your way. You’ve actually seen ships turn and head the other way after seeing yours. Now, whether that be from the red flag or upon recognizing the Lady Luck, you’re not sure, but it means less work for you either way, so you aren’t keen on prying too deep. 
Surprisingly, Aventurine doesn’t like to settle things with a duel unless he has to. Rather, his preferred method is with a game. He’ll invite the captain of the other ship below deck for a game of poker or blackjack rather than clashing swords and guns. The wager? The same as usual- the lives of the crew and the supplies on board. The loser and his crew would have to walk the plank and all treasures aboard would be handed over to the winning party. It’s not often it happens, but it’s still a nerve-wracking experience each time. Topaz had nearly passed out from anxiousness the first time he’d bet her life alongside yours and Ratio’s not long after she’d joined, while Ratio had lifted Aventurine up by the collar and nearly thrown him overboard. It was only thanks to your intervention and pleading that your captain hadn’t met his end that day.
… Safe to say, many a pirate crew have lost their lives and treasure this way. 
Like the crew that was idiotic enough to challenge Aventurine’s luck and consequently met their end just a few minutes ago. 
You watch as the captain of the ship anchored across from yours goes overboard with a resounding splash. His crew had already jumped before him. 
“That’s the last of ‘em,” says Topaz as she confirms with the spyglass. “Ratio and Cap’n are going through and seeing what treasure they had. But what would we do about their ship?”
“Leave it. We don’t have any cannons on board to blast it to smithereens and it's not worth adding another vessel to our fleet.”
Veritas and Aventurine push several treasure chests across the gangplank. Once the last of them are on your ship, Veritas lifts the gangplank and weighs the anchor and soon, you’re off again. 
“Let’s see what we have in here,” says Aventurine as you all stroll over curiously. He pops the lids off the chests and collective “oohs” and “aahs” fill the air as you marvel at the sparkling treasure filled to the brim inside. Aventurine lets out an appreciative whistle and lets a handful of multicolored gemstones slip through his fingers. 
“Have at it. Go and take your pick.”
Veritas snatches up the sailing charts while Topaz lays claim to the abundance of weapons. Her eyes are sparkling as she looks at the weapons in much need of some love and a deep-cleaning, and you can already tell what she’ll be up to for the next week or so. Meanwhile, you go through the chests with slim hope they’ll contain some medical supplies. To your disappointment, but not surprise, you find none. You instead settle on some pearl jewelry that catches your eye. 
“You guys barely took anything,” comments Aventurine as he peers into the chests again. “They’re still practically full.”
“That’s because gold and jewelry can only get us so far,” you remind him as he steps behind you to fasten the string of pearls around your neck. The cold metal of his nail guards and warmth of his fingertips lightly brushing over the nape of your neck make you shudder. From the faint chuckle that escapes him, your action didn’t go unnoticed. 
“Credits are where it’s really at,” adds Topaz as she gets to sharpening and polishing a sword. Aventurine rolls his eyes and scoffs.
“Of course the budding businesswoman would say that.”
He barely ducks out of the way in time to avoid Numby being chucked toward his head. 
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Heavy wind and rain batters the Lady Luck later that night. But it’s cozy and warm beneath the deck in your dining room. Mismatched dishes and cups cover the round table the four of you are seated around, the food having long since been polished off. Numby is in a food coma by Topaz’s feet and Doubloon purrs contentedly in your lap. Veritas had gone off to bed earlier and Topaz is mumbling incoherently to herself, having drank more than she usually does in one sitting. With Aventurine’s help, you help Topaz to her feet and tuck her into bed while Numby sleepily trots after you. 
The two of you are back in the kitchen, silently doing the dishes and cleaning the space. When you’re finished, you bid him goodnight until you feel his hand latch onto your sleeve.
“What is it?”
“... Stay. Please.”
“... Captain, did you have too much to drink at dinner earlier?”
“I’m fine,” he grumbles. “Not even tipsy.”
The pink flush on his cheeks makes you doubt his words, but you let him lead you toward his quarters. The space is warm and extravagantly decorated. Atlases and maps are piled atop the heavy wooden desk in the corner with several candles burning throughout that fill the room with light. His wardrobe is even more packed than yours, overflowing to the point where you can barely make out the original floor beneath the heaps and piles of clothing. You carefully step over what you believe is a pile of silken robes on the way to his bed, where you lay him to sleep amongst the many fluffy pillows and heavy blankets covering the mattress. 
He stops you again as you’re about to leave.
“Don’t.”
“Captain, you have to go to sleep soon.”
“I’m not tired,” he argues childishly. “I have something I need to tell you.”
The uncharacteristic seriousness of his voice has you straightening up. You cast a glance at the door to ensure it’s locked as he sits up and drapes a luxurious fur over your shoulders. He pats the empty space next to him and after a moment of hesitation over the implications of getting into bed with your captain, you join him. 
“Truth be told, I haven’t been able to sleep lately,” he laments. “I’ve been plagued by nightmares…”
It’s only now you notice the dark circle under his exposed eye and a pang of guilt strikes your heart. You cautiously remove the bejeweled eyepatch and expose his blind eye- a privilege granted to only you- and frown at the sight.
“How long has this been going on for?”
“A while now,” he grumbles. You click your tongue and your frown deepens.
“Why didn’t you come to me about this earlier?”
Aventurine rolls his eyes. 
“Please. It’s nothing worth worrying your pretty head over.”
The remark has the opposite effect he intended. You glare at him and angrily tug on his ear.
“Captain, I think you’ve forgotten this, but it’s our duty to ensure you’re fit to sail even if you do piss us off to no extent at times. I’m responsible for ensuring you’re in good health, Topaz is responsible for making sure we can defend ourselves, while Ratio is in charge of making sure we don’t veer off course. We are all your responsibility just as much as you are ours.” 
He sighs and looks away. Figures. He should’ve known better than to expect you’d let his neglectfulness slip by the wayside. Meanwhile, you roll your neck and irritatedly sigh. 
“You mentioned nightmares. Do you want to talk about them?”
He keeps avoiding eye contact. With a resigned sigh, you lean against him languidly, head resting on his shoulder. Aventurine stiffens, clearly not used to touch, but relaxes after a few seconds. A hand comes to grasp yours. 
“... They always start off the same way,” he begins. “We’re lost at sea somehow and there’s always foul weather. Amidst the lighting, a ghost ship is illuminated.”
He swallows. 
“We then investigate that ship to discover that her hull is filled to the brim with gold and treasures alike, but no captain or crew on board.”
Aventurine begins fiddling with the poker chip he always carries on him. 
“And this is where things can change. Sometimes, I’ll turn and see that she’s hung you all before my eyes. Other times you’ll all have gone overboard, drowned by a rogue wave snatching everyone up except for me. Sometimes she’ll even steal my sight. Either way, they all end the same way. I’m cursed to be her captain forever, sailing the seas without an end in sight. A captain that didn’t go down with his ship and left without a crew.”
He lets out a dry, humorless laugh and tucks the chip back into his pocket. You swallow dryly.
“Do you think it has anything to do with…?”
You look down at his hands, then back up at him. He doesn’t meet your gaze.
“... How much do you know?”
It sounds more like a threat than a question- but a weak one at that. You scoff and take his hands in yours, taking care to remove the nail guards one by one as well.
“What do you mean by that? Kakavasha, you know by now I couldn’t care less about who you are. And honestly, I’m kind of offended that you think I would,” you sigh as you remove his hat and the teal bandana wrapped around his head. “All this time together and I was under the impression you held me in higher regard than that.”
“Cut the theatrics,” he grumbles. You toss his hat and bandana off to the side and pull the blankets snugly over you both. 
“But a ghost ship, hm?” you say, eyeing the stack of open books on his desk. “That’s never a good sign. Surely we’re not sailing towards our imminent deaths, right?”
He draws you closer as you roll over onto your stomach and gaze up at him with sleepy eyes. He feels his heart somersault at the proximity and your warmth seeping into the sheets. It’s an unfamiliar feeling he’s not quite comfortable with yet and tries to play it off with a laugh.
“I’d sure hope not.”
But it’s the first time he’s met your gaze this entire night. You meet his eyes unflinchingly, as you always do, with a lazy smile as you shift onto your side. 
“... There’s no storm that Veritas can’t lead us out of,” you quietly reassure. “No monster that Jelena can’t kill. No injury that I can’t heal.”
A hand sneaks out from beneath the covers to grasp his.
“And no captain better fit to lead us through the storm than you. So chin up, ok? We’ll make it out together on the other side surrounded by calm seas just fine.”
Aventurine shakily exhales. There’s still more on his mind but… forget it. They’re not worth worrying you over.
“... If you say so, sweetheart.”
“‘Course I do. Because I believe in your abilities.”
He stares at you disbelievingly before bursting out into laughter.
“You really are something, you know? Something so incredible I could practically kiss you right now.”
“Then do it.”
Your gaze is steadfast like it’s always been ever since joining. Not once have you ever flinched away from witnessing every aspect about him, both pretty and ugly. Every reckless, stupid, horrible decision he’s ever made was an attempt to chase you off the ship so you wouldn’t see him for who he really is. But for some reason, whether it be your persistence or having figured out his motives, you’ve stuck around. 
He’s a coward of a man at heart, but you’ve surely seen through his grandeur by now. You may pretend to be a mere nurse, but Aventurine knows that’s far from the case. You surely have to know his biggest, darkest secret by now, yes?
“And if I don’t?”
“Then I’ll tell Ratio that you’re the one who’s been leaving obscene doodles on his chalkboard and Topaz that you’re the reason for Numby’s sudden weight gain.”
“Seems like my hand has been forced,” he chuckles. “Fine. You win this round, my beloved nurse.”
The rain continues pouring outside, but it’s still warm and dry beneath the deck. And if one kiss leads to something that lasts until the candles burn out, then… 
That’s a secret for you to keep then, yes?
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It’s not the sun that wakes you the next morning. Rather, it’s the weight of a blond man sprawled out on top of you that does. 
“Kakavasha… get off me. You’re heavy and I can’t breathe.”
“Mmm… no. You’re comfy.”
His arms tighten around your waist as you flail around and try to shake him off. 
“Captain, your duties and crew await you! Let go of me!”
After some more incessant squirming and an accidental kick to his stomach, he finally relents. You shake him off and get ready for the day, trying to not think about what transpired last night as you change and do your makeup. The mere thought of it is enough to make your face heat up several degrees… 
When you’re finished, you peek into his room on the way to the main deck out of curiosity, only to see he’s still in the same spot you left him in. When he sees you glaring at him disapprovingly from the doorway, he perks up.
“Help me get ready?”
“Captain, you are a grown ass man.”
“Pretty please?”
He hurries to his feet and scurries over, before sinking to his knees and wrapping his arms around your waist. He fixates you with those big, watery dual-colored eyes and you just can’t bring yourself to say no even though you know he’s playing you like a fiddle
“... Fine. But just this once. And not a word to Ratio and Topaz, got it?”
“Understood, my dear nurse!”
You start by all but tossing his clothes toward him, then turning and facing the other way resolutely as he gets dressed.
“Won’t you help your poor captain out here?”
A loud “oof!” escapes him as you toss his long coat over your shoulder. The weight of it, gold embellishments and gems and all, knocks him flat on his back and onto his bed again. He takes his sweet time getting dressed after that, grumbling all the while until he’s done. 
The wealth of accessories he wears are next. Aventurine slips on the pair of golden anchor earrings that are as heavy as one as you layer his necklaces the way he likes them. He preens like a bird under your attention and you have to fight back the comment likening him to a peacock that brews on the tip of your tongue. 
You re-wrap the bandana around his head before placing his hat on slightly tilted- just the way he likes it. Almost done. Just one last touch before he’s ready. You pull out a tin of salve and dab it onto the scar over his eye. Aventurine scrunches his nose up in distaste at the strong herbal smell, but lets you do as you please. You pat it dry and secure his eyepatch, nodding in satisfaction at your handiwork. 
“Perfect. There’s our captain, ready to command and conquer the seas.”
“I think you meant to say my captain, especially after last night. Weren’t you the one-”
You shut him up with a zealous kiss to the lips that has him sighing in bliss when you pull away, a dazed expression on his face and a pretty shade of pink on his lips that matches the one on yours. 
For such an eccentric man, he sure can be predictable when you have him dancing in the palm of your hand. 
The skies are cloudier and darker than you’d like them to be when you step out onto the deck. It’s also quite windy too. Veritas is lowering one of the sails while Topaz is on lookout duty. Upon seeing the two of you hand in hand, the former scoffs and rolls his eyes while the latter whistles obnoxiously.
“Good morning to you two lovebirds! I take it you had some fun last night?”
You chuck a pastry you had nabbed from the kitchen at Topaz to shut her up. She catches it deftly with one hand while Numby jumps up and down around her, pleading for a bite, but at least it worked. Meanwhile, Veritas is glaring at you with disgust in his eyes.
“What?” you ask innocently.
“I couldn’t sleep a wink last night.”
Oh. Oops.
“You’re just complaining because you’re jealous, doc,” interjects Aventurine with an arm thrown around your shoulder. The purple-haired man scowls angrily and turns on his heel, storming away angrily while grumbling something about the too-thin walls on the ship.
“And wipe that lipstick mark off your mouth,” he snaps at Aventurine. His face flushes guiltily while you snicker behind your hand. 
Topaz lifts the spyglass away with a worried look on her face.
“Cap’n, there’s a storm brewing up ahead. A pretty intense one from the looks of it and because the winds are reaching us out here already.”
Normally, he’d laugh such concerns off and lazily give the order to circle around it. But this time, he wordlessly takes the spyglass from her and looks out toward the horizon where dark storm clouds are gathering and swirling.
“... Turn around.”
You think you’ve misheard him and so does everyone else.
“What?”
“Turn the ship around,” he quickly orders as he places the spyglass back into Topaz’s hands and hurries over to the helm. “If we go now at full sail, we should be able to outrun it until it dies out.”
Ratio and Topaz share confused looks but do as he says, obediently hoisting all the sails as Aventurine spins the wheel. The Lady Luck slowly turns around and soon she’s sailing ahead at full speed. Even so, the storm clouds aren’t getting any smaller. 
There’s a level of urgency etched into Aventurine’s face that you haven’t seen before as he pushes the Lady Luck to her limits. His hands grip the wheel so tightly you think that any more and the wood would crack. It’s as if he’s trying to outrun something, especially with how often he looks back over his shoulder at the encroaching clouds blanketing the sky in pitch-black darkness. 
Even sailing at near-top speeds, you still aren’t able to outrun the storm. Heavy clouds that bring with them an oppressive humidity and electrical charge to the air roll in rapidly, surrounding you on all four sides. There’s a strange buzz in the air and your hair begins to stand on end. There’s a small patch of clear sky in front of you that’s your only escape, and it’s rapidly shrinking. 
Come on, just a little faster… just a little more…!
Her prow just barely breaks free of the storm when a sudden flash of lightning temporarily blinds you all. When you open your eyes again, it’s so dark you can only see a few paces in front of you. Not a single shred of light escapes the thick storm clouds rolling overhead that have finally completely moved in, and you realize the sky is tinged a sickly green when lightning flashes. The air is heavy and humid and mere seconds later, heavy, fat raindrops fall from the clouds, splattering angrily against the deck. The temperature plummets and the raindrops condense into giant hailstones, harshly stinging your skin as they pelt you and the deck with harsh cracks. The slippery surface of the deck and angry seas tossing the ship around as if she weighs nothing make it so that you’re constantly sliding into walls and hitting things. 
You’re surrounded by the storm with no way out in sight.
Ratio lowers the sails as fast as he can and jumps down the second he’s done. Mere milliseconds later, the boom swings about violently toward the spot he was just at. A moment sooner and he would’ve surely died upon impact.
You regroup by Aventurine’s side, who’s staring at the churning waters with barely-concealed horror. Towering, white-capped waves crash mercilessly against her hull and spill onto the deck. The salty spray of the ocean shoots up as high as the masts and stings your eyes. The continuous gusts of winds threaten to rip the sails off the masts and howl against your ears. The Lady Luck rolls violently amidst the choppy waves and your stomach twists into knots at every drop. Poor Topaz is already throwing up over the side of the ship and Ratio is starting to look a little green. 
“So this is it then,” he murmurs under his breath, so quietly you think only your ears heard it. Before you can respond, he gets ahold of himself and gives the order to tie down everything that isn’t secured and for all hands on deck. Veritas and Topaz stumble off first, making quick work of the ship, but you linger by his side a bit longer.
“This is no natural storm, is it?”
“... No,” he responds, his voice clipped as he fights to keep the Lady Luck buoyant. “It isn’t.”
You’re emerging from your quarters when you think you hear a melodic voice drifting over the choppy waves, singing an unknown yet enchanting tune. For all your time spent in taverns and performing in them, you’ve never heard anyone with a voice even close to the one you’re hearing right now. The voice is clear and high-pitched and whoever’s singing hits every note perfectly. You feel yourself go limp and you begin seeking out the voice, even getting up on shaky legs before Veritas yanks you back down. With the last of his strength, he shoves wax into your ears before he too falls victim to the song. Topaz, with her ears safely covered, takes the initiative and with your help, manages to subdue him enough for you to plug his ears. Not an easy task for a man of his size and build actively struggling against your hold. 
You’re practically deaf now. All you can hear is the loudest of the waves crashing against the ship’s hull and the thunder booming directly overhead. Topaz roughly shakes you and you manage to make out what she’s saying even with the heavy rain obscuring your vision.
“What about our captain?!”
Ice courses through your veins. She’s right. You were so caught up in saving yourselves that you’ve left your captain completely defenseless. Oh no.
But when you look around, you see your captain still at the helm, seemingly immune to the siren’s song drifting through the air. He fights the ocean at every turn and spins the wheel to and fro as heavy waves tip her from side to side. He eventually manages to stabilize the ship for long enough to where you can get back up on your feet after being thrown around like a rag doll. Long enough for you to lock the rest of the ship up. 
You cling to anything you can get your hands on as you slowly make your back to the deck, but it’s surprisingly difficult. Your whole body hurts from being thrown around, your arms are sore from holding onto anything for dear life, and your balance is off. Your feet keep slipping and sliding and when you make your way to the deck, you see why: the Lady Luck’s prow is pointed directly up and you already know what’s going to happen next.
“Hold fast!” shouts Aventurine. In the instant before the ice-cold waters sweep over you, Ratio grabs you and Topaz around the waist and hunkers down in the corner of the deck, gripping the railing with all his strength while you latch your arms around his waist. You manage to squeeze your eyes shut and inhale before the force of the rushing waters hits you. Even with your iron-clad grip around him, the bone-chilling cold temperature of the ocean plunges you head-first into shock and your grip loosens up ever so slightly- just enough for you to be swept away. Your limp body is harshly thrown against a corner- something cracks upon impact and needle-sharp pain shoots up your spine- before another wave lifts you up and over the railing, plunging you into the endless, swirling depths. 
“Cap’n! (Name)’s gone overboard!”
The water sloshing around on the deck comes up to his knees now. Aventurine looks down at his legs, then toward the churning seas, then back at his legs. Without any hesitation, he tosses his coat aside and jumps overboard to the astonishment of Topaz and Ratio.
“Captain!”
“You damned gambler! Have you gone insane?!”
Everything sounds muffled and distant as you sink further down and down. Your lungs are burning and your vision is beginning to darken as you gaze up at the hull of the Lady Luck that’s growing smaller. 
Is this… it? And just when I think I’ve finally found the life I’ve been searching for… 
You think you see something dart by- a fish? No, it’s too big for one. The tail is a shiny lilac but the top half is that of a woman. Silvery hair flows out behind her as she stares at you curiously and you realize it’s a mermaid as she swims away. You gasp out of shock, only to regret it instantly when you begin gasping frantically for air after you accidentally inhale some water. You desperately claw and fight your way to the surface but it’s no use; your legs feel like lead and soon your arms follow. 
Right as your consciousness fades and the world goes black, you see a familiar face swimming toward you. Blond hair, multicolored eyes…
Captain? What’re you doing here?
There’s an uncharacteristic regretful look on his face as he gets closer. He says something- you can’t hear it- before he pulls you in gently and kisses you so softly you barely feel the brush of his lips against yours. 
A shimmering teal tail, the same kind as the mermaid you saw earlier, is the last thing you see. 
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You feel something warm and heavy nestled against your side. Two of them, actually.
It feels like you’ve been asleep for a very, very long time. It’s a struggle to open your eyes as if they’ve been sealed shut and your body feels stiff. It’s all too easy to fall back asleep, but… 
Upon opening your eyes, you’re greeted with the sight of Numby and Doubloon curled up against you. The former squeals and the latter meows anxiously now that you’re awake. You gently pet their heads.
“... Good morning to you two as well.”
Your voice comes out so hoarse and scratchy you almost get secondhand embarrassment from hearing it. Upon closer examination, you realize you’re in Aventurine’s quarters but there’s no sight of him. You do, however, see Topaz passing by in the door left ajar. She gasps loudly at seeing you moving around and almost drops whatever she’s holding to rush inside.
“You’re awake! Good, we were all so worried, especially Aventurine.”
“Ugh… quiet down a bit please. How long was I out for?”
“Almost a day and a half.”
You slowly shift into an upright sitting position, wincing when you feel a sharp stabbing pain in your chest. Topaz is immediately at your side, helping you up and covering you with furs and blankets when your teeth start chattering uncontrollably. Looks like the chill of the waters penetrated deep into your bones. 
“Easy now. You got some nasty injuries when you went overboard, such as a few fractured ribs. Ratio had to be the one to patch you up after Cap’n brought you aboard and-” her words are punctuated with a light-hearted chuckle “-I’ve never seen him so anxious for a person to wake up. Don’t tell him I said that though.”
She leaves and you lift up the handheld mirror on the nightstand, getting the first good look of yourself since almost drowning. You look relatively the same, save for the bruises all over your exposed skin and the sling your left arm is in. 
“You’re very lucky that you only got off with some fractured ribs, a broken arm, and a bunch of bruises. You very well could’ve died out there,” says Topaz as she walks back into the room with a warm drink in hand. “Ratio’s words, not mine. Although, he’s right.”
You accept the drink and after realizing what it is, gulp it down eagerly. Hot rum with honey, lemon, and cinnamon. A favorite of yours and a classic remedy whenever someone on the ship falls ill. Topaz makes it the best though. 
You stare down at the now-empty cup in your hands, its residual heat warming up your cold hands. It takes a while for your memory to be jogged, but you suddenly remember Aventurine going overboard too.
“Wait, Aventurine, where is-”
“In the bathroom waiting for you. He’s been quite moody ever since returning.”
You think back to when he saved you at death’s doorstep and you loudly gasp when you recall the last thing you saw. Your thoughts must’ve been written all over your face because Topaz merely sighs and takes the empty cup from your hands.
“... I’ll let him explain everything.”
She helps you to your feet and leaves you be. You hesitantly knock on the door and are instantaneously greeted with a “come in” from the other side. 
You see why Aventurine has been confined to the bathroom. The first thing you see is a long teal-colored tail shimmering and swaying lazily side to side in the dim candlelight; far too big for the tiny confines of the bathtub your captain is currently soaking in. The fins are long and slightly translucent at the ends as they smack against the floor upon seeing you enter. You stay frozen in place, eyes trailing up from his fins toward his face. The scales that you swear you’d see peeking out underneath his collar sometimes are on full display now. Patches of them are littered across his chest, arms and face. His hands are webbed now and so are his ears tinged green at the tips and peeking out beneath the mess of blond hair. The sharp fins along his forearms slice cleanly through the water as he shifts around and the gills on his neck flare upon seeing you. 
He stays frozen in place, watching. And waiting for your reaction. For what feels like eternity, none of you speak or even dare to breathe until you finally make the first move. You shakily laugh and exhale- he jolts at the sound- and you sink to your knees besides him, albeit with some difficulty. When you finally do speak, it’s with a gentle voice as you’re eyeing his tail resting in your lap.
“So that explains it all. And here I was wondering if I was hallucinating seeing you with scales.”
Aventurine lets out a laugh of sheer relief. His shoulders droop and he slouches against the edge of the bathtub, all tension seemingly dissipating from his body. He seems to take notice of your injuries after he’s relaxed. A webbed finger reaches out to lightly trace your arm in a sling and he frowns at the sight.
“... I’m sorry.”
You blink, astonished.
“What?”
“I’m sorry,” he repeats, and that’s all he has to say. 
“It’s just some broken bones,” you lightly respond. “Inconvenient, sure, but nothing I can’t recover from. Besides, you saved me from certain death.”
“It’s not just about that. I narrowly avoided the nightmare I saw in my dreams, but at what cost?”
He goes quiet and refuses to elaborate. You decide it’s for the better to change the topic.
“So… care to tell me about your tail?”
Aventurine sighs. He knew he wouldn’t be able to keep this a secret from you forever, but he’s still a bit hesitant to tell you.
“Exposure to waist-deep water gives me legs and vice versa thanks to a deal I made with Jade a long time ago. In exchange for getting to experience life as a human, I would have to bring promising people to her door and continuously supply her with valuables.”
“Jade is a… sea witch?”
Aventurine snorts and scoffs. 
“What, did she not seem enough of a conniving witch the first time you met her?”
“Fair enough,” you concede. “But what made you want to experience life on land?”
“It wasn’t a choice.”
“Oh.”
Your eyes land on the tattoo on the side of his neck that’s on full display now. You dare not say what it spells out loud. He scratches at the spot, conveniently covering it with his hand, and silence fills the space for a bit. 
“What happened after the storm passed?”
You break the silence first. He seems relieved at the distraction and begins playing with the pearl bracelet fastened around your wrist. 
“The storm passed almost as soon as I rescued you. I brought you back to the surface, where-”
“Wait, does that mean Veritas and Topaz know you’re-”
He sighs and nods. You falter a bit.
“... How did they react?”
Aventurine thinks back for a bit. 
“I think they were just surprised. I don’t think they’ve fully processed it either.”
He laughs and shrugs.
“I can’t blame them. Their captain and a feared creature among sailors are one and the same.”
He sighs and looks at the closed bathroom door.
“They’ve been giving me a wide berth since then…” 
“I’m sure they’ll come around. They just need some more time,” you reassure. “But what happened after that?” you ask, pressing for more information. His tail curls around your waist and swiftly pulls you closer to the bathtub- he’s surprisingly strong in this form, you quickly realize as you squirm around only for him to not budge one bit. You rest your tired head against your arms and gaze at him with half-lidded eyes that he meets unflinchingly with a gaze of his own and a lazy smile. 
“Once you’re feeling better, go thank Ratio for his prompt medical care. As soon as I resurfaced, he practically yanked you out of my arms and started treating you. You inhaled quite a bit of water and Ratio had to get you to cough it all out. A bit gross, seeing it unfold in front of my eyes.”
“... You saw it all?” you ask, horrified and disgusted.
His lazy smile turns impish and he flicks some water toward you.
“Ah, you should’ve seen yourself,” he muses out loud. “Flopping around on the deck like a fish out of water and soaked to the point where you looked like Doubloon during bath time. It made for quite the sight- wait, don’t leave!”
He reaches out to you desperately and his tail tightens even more around your waist. You shoot him a withering glare before settling back down again. 
“The storm calmed down soon after I saved you,” he continues. “The Lady Luck sustained some damage to the sails and she sprung a few leaks in the hull, but nothing that Ratio and Topaz weren’t able to repair. Later, you woke up and here we are.”
“Really? That’s it?”
“Really, that’s it,” he repeats. 
“What a coincidence it stops after narrowly escaping death,” you grumble. He rolls his eyes.
“No kidding,” he scoffs. 
Aventurine plucks a glimmering scale off and holds it out like a peace offering to you. It shifts between colors in the candlelight, going from pink to green to gold with a holographic sheen covering it. He notices the confused expression you wear and lightly laughs.
“What? Didn’t you know, mermaid scales are exceedingly valuable?”
You hold it closer, entranced by its dancing colors.
“I thought most of the ones on the market are frauds though?”
“That they are. But a real, genuine scale… those are only offered to the richest of the rich at a closed auction.”
“Yet here I am with one in my hand, free of charge.”
Aventurine laughs and plucks off another one for you. A look of hesitation crosses your face.
“... Doesn’t that hurt?”
“A little,” he admits. “But it’s nothing I can’t handle. Besides, they grow back.”
His words do nothing to budge the frown on your face and Aventurine makes a mental note to claim a scale fell off from natural causes the next time he gifts you one.
“How long do they take to grow back then?”
“... A long time,” he confesses after a beat of silence. 
“... I see why they’re so expensive now.”
You glance down at the two shining scales in your palm. Perhaps you’ll make jewelry out of them- an earring to match with your captain doesn’t sound half-bad…
But your curiosity is piqued now. Mermaids are the stuff of legends and you have one sitting in front of you. A few questions couldn’t hurt, right?
“What else can you do?”
His tail flicks back and forth excitedly. Anything to impress you!
“We can cry pearls and other valuable jewels. Want to see?”
“Wait, don’t make yourself cry-”
Too late. Fat tears slide down his cheeks, condensing into something round and shiny before landing with a soft clink in his hands. Perfect pearls and tumbled sea glass pile up in his palms and you spot some shiny green stones- aventurine stones. He holds them out to you with an expectant look in his eyes. Your captain looks less of a fearsome mythical creature and more like an… eager puppy. You can’t possibly say no to such a face so with a resigned sigh, you accept his offering. 
“... Thank you, but please don’t make this a common occurrence in the future. I don’t want to see you cry.”
He pouts, fins drooping. Boo. There goes a courting attempt out the window. 
Like a puppy, you think as you watch him sulk in the bathtub. You poke at one of Ratio’s rubber ducks Aventurine had stolen from him bobbing along the water’s surface.
“You aren’t horrified?” he asks once he grows bored of staring at the duck. 
“Why would I be?”
“Don’t give me that. You know exactly what I mean.”
His tail swishes side to side agitatedly and his ears simultaneously flatten against his head and fold downwards. 
“Do you realize what I could do to you right now?” he asks in a low tone. “I could pull you under my song, strip you of your defenses, outwit you at every turn despite how clever you are…”
You’re leaning in unknowingly. A grin tugs at the corner of his mouth and he leans in closer, twirling a strand of your hair around a clawed finger. 
“I’ll infiltrate your mind and charm you into doing things you’d never think of doing,” he continues, voice even lower and softer now. “I could tell you to walk the plank and you would do it, no questions asked. I could drag you beneath the depths with me and no one would even notice you’re gone. Ah, but you’re already under my spell, aren’t you?”
“... What?”
“Exactly. I could even do… this!”
With a sudden yank, he pulls you into the tub with him. Water splashes over the edge onto the floor and you scream. Even so, he holds tight and winds his tail tightly around you, nuzzling his cheek against yours and nipping your cheeks. They’re love bites more than anything else, but you shudder at the thought of how different the situation could be had he not been so head over heels for you. 
You also shudder as the cold water soaks through your clothes and sends a chill up your spine. 
“Let me go. The water’s cold.”
Aventurine merely holds onto you even tighter. Tucked into the crook of his neck like this, you can see his gills rapidly opening and closing out of contentment and the self-satisfied smile stretching wide across his face. He seems content to stay in this position for ages, leaning in to bury his nose into your hair and press kisses to your cheek repeatedly, but it’s only until you start shivering that he reluctantly lets go. 
Before you step out the tub, he holds his left hand out. You hesitantly extend your right hand out until he gently bats it away and gestures for your left hand instead. It’s bundled in a sling but you manage to make it work somehow. 
“There we go,” he says once your palm is pressed against his. “Now, close your eyes.”
You do as he says and thick, syrupy words flow like honey from his mouth. The words practically stick together as his voice rises and falls melodically in some unknown language. It sounds soothing, in the way a mother’s voice would lull a child to sleep. 
“There,” he whispers after a peck to your forehead. “All done. You can open your eyes now.”
“What was that?”
“... A prayer,” he admits. “A prayer for your continued health and safety.”
There’s a funny feeling in your stomach and you fight back the stupid smile creeping onto your face. 
“You shouldn’t have. But thank you.”
You curl your good arm around him and with a sharp heave, lift him up. His long tail snakes around your waist and you almost fall over from the weight.
“Stop that! You’re heavy!”
“How heartless of you.”
You dunk him back into the bathtub unceremoniously. His tail splits down the middle and scales begin falling off rapidly in patches. The fins shrivel and dissolve and pearly-smooth legs soon emerge. With a start, you try to look away but he merely scoffs and languidly stretches out in your arms.
“What? It’s nothing you haven’t already seen.”
Now fully dressed, Aventurine emerges onto the deck with you in hand. Topaz is playing fetch with Numby and Doubloon while Ratio is at the helm. The two pets, upon seeing you, dash over to you and run in circles around you with Numby oinking and Doubloon meowing excitedly. Topaz all but topples you over in an excited hug while your navigator scolds her, reminding the woman of your frail condition. 
“How are you feeling?” asks Veritas as he comes to a stop before you. You hum and beam at him.
“Never felt better thanks to your immediate care.”
He brushes your compliments off with a scoff and a wave of his hand, all accompanied by his usual eye roll. 
“Think nothing of it. It was merely my duty.”
Topaz leans against you from behind while Ratio coughs and steps back from you a bit. They eye your captain with the respect and admiration they always have, but now there’s a hint of skepticism underlying it all. 
“Gambler, we deserve an explanation for what happened back there,” demands Veritas. Aventurine sighs and shakes his head. 
“I know, but that’ll happen in due time. For now, let’s just… keep moving forward.”
He takes the helm. Ratio hoists the sails and Topaz climbs up to the crow’s nest to keep lookout. Things are never going to be quite the same as before now, but that’s alright in your eyes. Everyone boarded the Lady Luck for their own reasons and their captain secretly being a mermaid in disguise doesn’t change any of that. You boarded the ship to carve out a life for yourself you would’ve never had back on land. Ratio boarded to spread knowledge. Topaz boarded to bring change into the world. Your captain has already helped those dreams come true. Nothing the legends say will do anything to sway your opinion on him. 
There will come a day when the Lady Luck will complete her last voyage, Aventurine will have to return to the seas, and the crew will be disbanded, but that day isn’t today. It won’t be when he comes clean to the crew either. Rather, it’ll be in the far future when no amount of repairs can keep the Lady Luck from falling apart and you’re no longer able to handle the challenges of life at sea. But you’ll cross that bridge when you get there. 
The seas are calm. It’s clear out with a strong breeze that cools you off amidst the sun’s sweltering rays. Ratio is repairing a tear in one of the sails that escaped his earlier attention while Topaz hums a tune she picked up from you atop the crow’s nest, scouting the surrounding waters. You meet Aventurine’s gaze out the corner of your eye. Wordlessly, he pulls you into his side with one arm as you look out upon the ocean. 
“Have you accomplished your goal of conquering the seven seas?” you tease. He scoffs and smirks.
“Oh, I did that a long time ago already. But there’s one last desire I have yet to fulfill.”
“And what might that be?”
He gazes down at you silently, yet the silence between you speaks volumes. A raised eyebrow and a head tilt. A cheeky wink and a kiss to your forehead. An exasperated sigh from your two crewmates as you pull away from returning the kiss.
There’s always one question you ask when heading to a new destination, and this time is no different. Gazing into his multicolored eye, you can’t imagine yourself anywhere else other than here, now and forever. 
“So where to next, Captain?”
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enjoyed my work? the taglist is open!
@ theother-victoria, do not copy, repost, modify, translate, or feed to ai
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calamitoustide · 21 days ago
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something possessed me to do this last night and did you know i love them
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wow-an-unfunny-joke · 5 days ago
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Pick something for me to write
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Ignore the blacked out thing, that’s someone else’s document
#some description:#I have no fucking clue what untitled document is#it could be ANYTHING#Marius angst is me going ‘buddy grew up in a war zone and doesn’t trust his immortality. let’s play with. also perhaps an eating disorder?’#One Bullet (WIP title) is#okay so#the plot of the fic: Pre immortality Jonny-he just shot his father#his dad is dead#he’s just kinda. sitting there. with a dead dad.#he thought it would be harder??? though t it might take longer???? it’s just occuring to him that this is permanent and might change his#life/ probably for the better tbh. his dad sucked. but still#and so there’s this one video#that’s just one eyed jacks#from like- a live show or smth#and after Jonny finishes the little speech his dad gives him but before he gets to one eyed jacks again#Jonny is sorta like acting out the bit- and he’s all sad. and he starts to turn the gun onto himself but then suddenly panics and points it#towards the audience#and I only noticed this after a comment pointed it out#and then my writer brain got ticking#so the plan there is Jonny is sad- about to shoot himself- Dr Carmilla walks in and is like ‘how about no.’#I might rewrite that one entirely (I don’t like how I’m writing Jonny’s thoughts about his dad rn)#and I have no idea where I’m going with the Marius fic- I’m just making it up as I’m going along#wow that’s more tags than I intended.#the mechs band#the mechanisms#the mechs fanfic#tw sui implied#okay anyways. this post is just me advertising the super cringe fail angst im writing and might even post if I finish#so like. idk. if you want to see these if I finish them tell me? I plan to write something about Brian too#welp. have a nice day :D
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needlesandnilbogs · 10 months ago
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The worst part about writing long aus is that you can’t infodump about it (without having to explain everything first so they get the context) unless you’re willing to make someone read 150k words
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chamerionwrites · 2 days ago
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First things first: yeah! That’s an entirely valid interpretation of the story - in fact it’s probably the most straightforward interpretation of the story - and one that I have zero problems with. I can see how this might not be immediately clear, but I do not in fact have any objection to that reading. When people break out the above quote to argue that - as you said in the tags - “grimdark hopeless isn’t any more realistic or true to life than all the other types of stories we tell to each other,” I agree with them!
And I do think it’s important, here, to acknowledge the context in which those discussions are often taking place. Namely: there exists a very tired argument wrt SFF in particular that speculative worlds aren’t believable without racism/homophobia/misogyny/etc, and that defends even the most slapdash and thoughtless writing about such issues as “realism”. Funny enough this concern for realistic worldbuilding rarely seems to get raised in the name of exploring sociopolitical injustices, and how they’re created and reproduced, and their effects on people’s lives. Instead it’s usually deployed as an argument for slapping those injustices unchanged and unexamined onto every imagined world - with zero thought about all the other ways a setting might be wildly different from our own! - and also for Why All Protagonists Should Be Straight White Men. Nobody else in the universe has ever done anything interesting or worth reading about obvs! (This is an ideological position that we’re going to describe as “realistic” and “historically accurate” without the slightest hint of irony!) We love the mental puzzle and challenge of creating and imagining other worlds and ways of being….but in this one specific respect, the way our world is and has been is the ONLY realistic way that a world can or could (…or should?) ever be!
This argument has been done to death enough and we’re on the same page enough that I don’t feel the need to say much more about it here except that yeah, on top of being nakedly reactionary it’s also mind-numbingly stupid and boring. Long story short, my frustration in the op is very much NOT about people insisting on the artistic validity - or the artistic value - of imagining other, better worlds.
What does frustrate me is a loud minority of folks who insist on making a super unfounded (imo) rhetorical move from “[not] only pain is intellectual, [not] only evil is interesting” to “pain and evil, failure and darkness, CAN NEVER be interesting.” They’re not just arguing for the value of imagining better worlds. They’re arguing that their own preference for happy, escapist fiction is a moral imperative, that dystopia and tragedy are a failure of artistic and political imagination. And it’s that, specifically- that smug disdain for sad or dark or confrontational stories, the insistence that they could only ever appeal to pretentious reactionary edgelords - which I was objecting to up top. First because I think that’s an equally simplistic and ungenerous and impoverished way to engage with any fiction. Second, because I think it’s a wildly unjustifiable reading of Omelas specifically.
Because whatever sort of story you prefer and whatever you believe that Le Guin is saying, the truth is that the power and punch of that story derives from dystopia. The reason that people remember it, and argue about it, and write spin-off stories about it or in dialogue with it, is because that vividly horrific premise - the tortured child and the society that turns on the child’s suffering - gets into people’s heads and haunts them. I have enough respect for Le Guin to believe that if she had solely wanted to make a kind and just world real to the reader, and defend the artistic merit in doing so, she could have. But she didn’t. She sketched a society so upsetting that it practically spawned its own micro-genre of professional fix-it fics - and then she pointedly refused to elaborate on any alternative. (“The place they go towards is a place even less imaginable to most of us than the city of happiness. I cannot describe it at all. It is possible that it does not exist.”)
THAT is the context in which that quote about “the treason of the artist” exists. Which means one of two things. Either “The Ones Who Walk Away From Omelas” is astonishingly lacking in self awareness, an abject failure by its own artistic standards - or Le Guin was making a more complex and graceful point than just dystopias bad and boring. Those are the terms.
I happen to think she’s making a more complex and graceful point! I think those internal tensions in the story are productive, not self-contradictory. I don’t think that “a story about the world as it is” and “a story about the world as it should be” are in any way mutually exclusive. I think you can engage with an unjust reality without dismissing alternative possibilities. (eg “We live in capitalism; its power seems inescapable. So did the divine right of kings.”) I think you can harness the metaphorical and emotional and provocational power of tragedy and darkness to insist that other, better worlds are possible. Isn’t that precisely what Omelas is doing? Isn’t that what a story like Black Sails is doing? The narrative works not despite but BECAUSE the audience is watching from a future in which we know there was no widespread successful 1715 slave revolt that overthrew colonialism in the Western Hemisphere. And yet the dramatic tension relies on some part of you believing in it. For the tragedy to work, you have to be able to imagine and mourn for that better future!
Does all of that make sense? I’m not saying your above reading of Omelas is wrong (to the contrary). Nor am I claiming that dark fiction is more intellectual & interesting, or that people aren’t entitled to their genre preferences. But ngl I have zero patience for anybody ripping that quote out of context to claim that a story about prevailing injustice can have no possible value. Injustice prevails every day, in real life. Many revolutions have failed in real life. We already live in Omelas - except that our version devours the lives of far more than one child. If the human mind and heart could comprehend the magnitude of corruption and colonialism, suffering and slavery, torture and rape and murder, ruined ecosystems and communities and dreams and lives and futures, that has been required and is STILL required so that you can buy bananas for sixty cents a pound at any time of year, then at almost any given moment you would be falling to your knees and weeping brokenly in the street.
Failure of imagination is one reason that kind of injustice is allowed to continue, for sure. A closely related reason is complacency. Because the proverbial Omelas kid is locked away in a basement where we don’t have to look. Because - as Black Sails spends a whole lot of narrative and thematic energy trying to illustrate - Civilization™️ is a machine that runs on mind-breaking amounts of devastating violence, and yet that violence is tolerated or celebrated when it isn’t entirely invisibilized.
So yeah, I agree that there’s a lot of value in imagining more just worlds. I’m simply not willing to concede that there’s no value in engaging with unjust worlds, because some people feel squeamish about injustice when a story asks them to truly look at it.
Guess I’m never going to stop seeing red about the unholy number of times I’ve seen people quote “The Ones Who Walk Away From Omelas” out of context in order to condemn stories that focus on dark or troubling subject matter or that don’t end happily (“The trouble is that we have a bad habit, encouraged by pedants and sophisticates, of considering happiness as something rather stupid. Only pain is intellectual, only evil interesting. This is the treason of the artist: a refusal to admit the banality of evil and the terrible boredom of pain”), when THE STORY ITSELF is about a society that closes its eyes to suffering and evil in order to live in comfort and has a hopeful but at best bittersweet ending
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bfpierce · 6 months ago
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#life is hell btw.#like sorry I’m being miserable this is a fandom blog lol but like#accepting my brother is alive but I’ll never really get to be with him again has been rough idk#and that’s just the latest thing there’s so much going on right now i don’t even know where to begin#i guess the thing is that with my brother he’s the only person in my family who likes me#like he’s the only one who really cares about me and tells me that and shows me that#no one else really likes me because I’m weird and hard to be around and stuff but my brother loves me#and he’s been struggling for years we both have but he’s had addiction problems and helping him has been hard but he was doing so well#and it’s hard to explain but it gets to a point where you can’t force help on them yknow#so you just have to resort to mourning while they’re still alive#I’m sorry i know that’s evil but there’s only so much i can do and I’ve done it all#I’ve been mourning him for years and now I’m mourning again#and i just feel awful#and i know it’s selfish to think this but my birthday is next week and it’s like he’s the only one who spends the day with me#my family will always have dinner with me and stuff but my brother knows i have no friends and it makes me sad being alone on my birthday#and he’s ALWAYS made an effort to be there on my birthday and spend the day with me no matter what#and now he’s in jail and will be in prison probably for the rest of my life#idk and really this is just one of many catastrophic things going on in my life i just need a break#and my breaks are immersing myself into my books and shows and movies#so thank you everyone for all the work you’ve been producing lately i know ot sounds silly but getting to come home and read your guys fics#and look at all of your art or even just reading your posts takes away so much of my stress and feeling of impending doom and helplessness#idk i just wanted to say I appreciate you all so much#please like if you read this though i can’t really talk about this stuff with anyone i just need to be heard
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heeliopheelia · 11 months ago
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𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐓𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐄𝐍𝐆𝐀𝐆𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐎𝐅𝐅 𝐃𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐀𝐍 𝐀𝐑𝐆𝐔𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓
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genre: hurt/comfort, angst, fluff
word count: 4.3k
warnings: cursing, crying, neglect, tiny mention of bleeding
a/n: i think i win the contest of overusing commas with this one 🤍 tbh this fic is just yapping so pls deal with me... it's good to write some proper angst again tho, i missed it :(( hope you guys like it and don't find them too repetetive!!
masterlist
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LEE HEESEUNG
It's been two weeks since you got the opportunity to take a proper look at Heeseung. And now as you do, you find it hard to recognize your fiancé who looks like he's about to collapse from exhaustion, to say the least. 
“I never asked you to mother me or worry about me so much. Stop getting into my business so much. I’m not a child, YN.”
It’s like he was blind to how hurt his words and actions were making you feel. It’s so unusual for him, so out of character and unfamiliar to you, that you can’t help but think that maybe it really is your fault for riling him up this much.
“I worry about you because I’m your fiancé and I love you, you jerk!” You scoff at his careless words and take a step back, the aching in your heart only increasing. “I only want to look after you because you clearly don't know how to do it yourself. I mean, look at yourself! You look as if you haven’t slept in a week and I know you haven’t been eating either. How can I not worry about you when all you do is neglect yourself?”
“Dunno, maybe find yourself something to keep you busy enough. You stay at home all day, do as much as nothing, no wonder you’re so damn nosy. I would be too with this much time on my hands.”
He’s so indifferent to everything you say, you try to recall where it all started going so wrong. All you did was ask whether he’s eaten at work or not, and now the two of you are snapping at each other as if you weren’t lovers, and trying not to hurt each other was a long forgotten thought by now. 
“If you’re so unhappy with our relationship – with me, maybe it’s best we take a break,” you say as you feel your throat tighten painfully. 
“Agreed. I never even wanted this marriage in the first place,” he scowls, silencing you, words rolling out of his mouth way quicker than his brain is able to process it. 
He bites his words back quickly when he watches your face dropping along with your shoulders, and fuck, you look as if you’ve given up on him right then and there. 
You walk away then, tears streaming down your face, muttering something about how ungrateful he was being, and all Heeseung could do was stand still as if plastered to the floor, in utter disbelief of his own, untrue, words.
After his cruel statement echoes through his head for the fourth time, he finally snaps out of the self pity and rushes after you to the kitchen where you’re leaned over the counter, head buried in your hands as you cry.
“Baby, I’m sorry,” he apologizes quickly. He walks up from behind you and wraps his arms around your waist, resting his forehead on your shoulder blade. “I didn’t mean it. I’m sorry for everything I said, sweetheart.”
He turns you around gently and feels his chest tighten at how fucking sad you look. He never wants to see you like this. He never wants to be the cause of this ever again.
And when he looks to the side, his throat closes and dries completely at the sight of your engagement ring laying on the counter right behind you. 
“Are you sure you didn’t mean it?” You ask, wiping the tears away with your hand pointlessly as another stream follows right after. “Things like that don’t come out of nowhere.”
“I didn’t, love, I swear I didn’t. I’m so fucking sorry,” he breathes out, pulling you closer to him by your neck again. 
Never again. Never fucking again. He keeps telling himself in his head as he lifts your hand to his lips and presses a kiss to your knuckles, just where your ring was supposed to be sitting snugly. Then he lowers it and places your palm against his chest, right above his heart, and covers your smaller hand with his.
That was too close to losing you, and himself, for that matter. Because he would never recover if you were gone from his life and all because of him. 
“Then why did you even say it?” You sob pitifully as you feel the warm tears dripping down the tip of your nose.
“I don’t know,” he shushes you gently, trying his best to not break you any further. 
You pull away once you feel calm enough, hands clutching his t-shirt. “It's not too late to call off the wedding, Seung,” you manage out breathily, raising your palm to cup his cheek. “I'd rather not take the step further than have you unhappy.”
“Darling, no.” Heeseung bends down to minimize the distance between the two of you and peppers your face with loving, warm kisses. He just wants to erase those atrocious thoughts out of your mind as quickly as possible. “Please, there's nothing I'd ever want more than to make you my wife. That was stupid of me to say. I'll never be happy if I'm not with you, my love.”
“I just don’t want to force this marriage on you. You need to want it as much as I do, otherwise it’s pointless.”
Heeseung almost chokes on air when he rushes out his answer even before you can properly finish your sentence. “I do want it. Please, you have to believe me.” 
“Really?”
Heeseung smiles at you softly as he wipes your wet cheeks with his thumbs. “Really. Scout’s honour.”
You breathe out, feeling relief, and look up at him with squinted, puffy eyes. “Sometimes I just wanna strangle you to death, Lee Heeseung.”
He chuckles lightly before pressing one last kiss to your cheek. “Aren't you just so adorable? You should add this to your wedding vows.”
“Maybe I’ll add this to your eulogy instead if you pull shit like that again.”
Heeseung clicks his tongue with a grin pulling on his lips. “Touché.”
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PARK JAY
The atmosphere in the living room is so heavy that your chest starts to hurt. You’re standing barely two steps away from the man you love the most, yet you’ve never felt more far away from him than in this moment. 
His eyes – cold but still undoubtedly full of love, drill holes in the side of your head as you turn your face away from him to try and gather your thoughts.
Arguments with Jay were rare. You always tried to work things out immediately, keeping your heads cool. But something has broken over the last month and you can’t see each other eye to eye anymore. At the very beginning of your relationship you made a promise to never go to bed angry. To never leave things unresolved. Yet now Jay’s been sleeping on the couch for the past week, and you fail to understand what the fuck has happened to the two of you. 
And you can’t help but think that, maybe, sometimes love is just not enough. 
“You’re not even trying to find the middle ground anymore. All you do is snap at me the second I come home. I’m fucking tired of it! Would it hurt to give it a rest for a day?” 
The tension is almost palpable. You hate how you can’t seem to back away from any argument but only keep hurting him instead. 
“Put effort into our relationship first, then we’ll talk,” you spit out instead, against your better judgment.
“It’s funny coming from you who’s done nothing but put a fucking distance between us!”
“This doesn’t make any sense anymore, Jay. We need some time apart,” you finally speak into the dull silence, eyes casted downwards at the floor as your hand keeps twitching, only to finally grab for your ring finger and slip the silver band off of it. You didn’t think much of your action, hell, you didn’t even process it properly. 
Well, not until you hear the shaky exhale leave Jay’s lips. 
Silently, he presses his lips together and nods his head before turning on his heel and leaving the room. You listen intently to the shuffling, then ringing of the keys and eventually the door being shut. 
A moment of silence turns into minutes of you staring at the ring on your palm with tears burning your eyes mercilessly. 
With your heart falling low to your stomach, you drop down on the couch and tug on your hair slightly, cursing yourself for acting so mindlessly. 
You wallow in self pity in the dead quiet room. The shiny ring feels so heavy and burning in your clenched fist. You take in a deep breath, then quickly slide the band back onto your finger, feeling instantly shielded with it being on its righteous place again.
And just like that, you spend the next three hours on the verge of losing your sanity. With no word from Jay. He’s left your messages unread. He’s left your calls unanswered. 
You don’t know whether he’s okay or hurt or simply gone. All that combined is enough to leave you panicked and terrified, unable to have a second of peace. 
You never meant to take it this far. This – your words and rapid actions, that will forever remain as one of your biggest regrets. You don’t like the idea that you made your other half feel like you’ve taken him for granted. Or for what’s worse, like a person that you can use for unloading your frustration on. 
There’s this throbbing pain in your chest as you realize that maybe he’s not coming back because why would he if you can’t even love him properly?
Your fingers are bleeding from how hard you’ve been picking on your cuticles. 
And then you hear the jingle of keys and soon the front door opens quietly. You know that even after all of this he’s still being careful to not wake you up. It’s killing you how he thinks you’d ever be able to get a wink of sleep without knowing he’s safe. 
You’re quick to drop your phone on the couch and shoot up on your legs, rushing over to the door and throwing yourself on Jay’s neck. 
“I was so worried about you!” You gasp out, clinging onto your fiancé desperately as tears unknowingly make their way down your cheeks. “Please, don’t ever do that again!”
“Sorry, my phone died,” he replies after a second or two, bringing his arm up to wrap around your waist and keep you close to him. 
He’s still upset but he understands where you’re coming from, knowing well that if it was you instead of him he’d probably go insane from worry. 
He can feel your heart hammering against his chest, so he lifts his hand and strokes your hair to help you calm down. But then you start crying, feeling his gentle touch even after everything you said, that was enough to push you over the edge. You clench your trembling hands on his sweater as you burst out with choked sobs, slouching against his warm and comforting body. 
“I’m sorry, ‘m sorry, ‘m sorry,” you weep into his chest like a mantra and Jay can quite literally feel his heart cracking at your miserable state. 
“It’s okay,” he whispers, hot air hitting your ear before he presses a soft kiss to its tip. “Don’t cry anymore, honey. We’re okay.”
“I don’t deserve that. I don’t deserve you,” you whimper quietly. “Please, don’t leave me.”
“Don’t say that,” he scolds you with a frown. Your whimpers twist his guts even more than your harsh words from before. “It’s not the first nor the last time we’ll have an argument. It’s not worth losing your pretty head over it, okay?” 
“I’m sorry,” you repeat one last time. “I promise I'll never take it off again. I’ll never lash out on you like that ever again too.”
Jay grabs your hand and runs his thumb over the thin silver band, the same one he was picking so carefully for weeks, and a small smile tugs on the corners of his mouth. He hates how shameful you sound. 
He’ll never tell you how the sight of you pulling your ring off your finger made him physically sick to his stomach. He can't have you feeling even worse than you already do. So instead he brings you close to him and rests his forehead on yours. 
“I’m so stupid,” you whisper quietly as you close your eyes, your heavy eyelashes letting go of another few droplets of crystal tears which Jay’s lips soak up instantly. “I don’t know what I’d do if you actually left.”
“You know me better than to think I’d let us break it off over such a petty fight.” And, yes, you do. But your lip wobbles with silent agony at the sole thought of that. “Hey,” he tries again as he presses a loving kiss to your red nose. “I’m not leaving, okay? How could I ever?” 
“I love you.”
With his thumb caressing your burning cheek so tenderly, you feel at peace again.
“I love you too,” he replies without skipping a beat. “No one can handle you as well as I do. And no one sees me for me like you do. We complete each other. We belong together.”
He kisses you silly then, until there’s no more tears left in your body and you’re barely able to breathe anymore. He kisses you until your legs give in and he swoops you up to carry you into your shared bed for the first time in what seems like forever.
He kisses you until it engraves in your mind that there’s no other person for him in this world but you.
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SIM JAKE
“Baby, I already apologized.” A groan lingers at the back of his throat but for his own sake he stifles it inside. “I don’t know what else you want me to do.”
You sit on the edge of your shared bed and clench your fingers on the silky duvet. “How about you start showing up to things we both agreed on attending to?”
He runs his hand down his face. “I know. It just slipped my mind, that’s all. You know how busy I’ve been this week.”
“This shouldn’t be my business only, though. I mean, for christ’s sake, it’s our wedding! I would really appreciate it if you participated in something for once!”
Flowers and cake. That’s literally all you’ve asked of him to go and pick with you for the wedding reception. Knowing his tight schedule, you picked the date carefully so that it wouldn’t meddle with his work and you could even go grab some dinner afterwards. But your plans all went out the window when he didn’t even bother showing up or giving you a heads up text, standing you up yet another time when it comes to your wedding preparations.
You’re honestly getting tired of it.
“I’ll be there next time,” he assures you quickly as he nervously taps his fingers on the doorway of your bedroom. 
“You said you wouldn’t do that,” your voice wavers as your shoulders drop with resignation. With the back of your hand, you wipe off the tears that made their way down your cheeks. “You promised to help, Jake. But you left me alone with everything, as usual.”
“It’s not even that big of a deal. This can be rescheduled any time. Baby, stop stressin’ so much.”
“But it is a big deal to me!” You cry out, palm reaching up to pinch the bridge of your nose. You breathe out heavily. “I don’t want to do everything by myself! We’re supposed to be in this together! If getting married means that I’m gonna be alone with all the responsibilities that you don’t consider important enough, I’m not even sure I still want it.”
To back up your words, your hand moves half-consciously to your ring finger and you twist the cool piece of jewelry in between your fingers. 
“No, no, no, no.” Jake moves quickly, nearly tripping over himself as he rushes towards you to desperately clasp your hand in his two and stop you from whatever the hell you were about to do. He drops to his knees in front of the bed, right at your feet. “Baby, you promised you’d never take it off.”
You’re at a loss of words as you look into his wide eyes, the seriousness of your actions only catching up to you now. You gasp quietly, eyes watering just like his, quickly relaxing your tensed hand in his and letting him slide the ring back down your finger, just where it belongs.
Silence envelopes the two of you, besides the sound of your sniffles. 
You feel awful. 
Jake feels even worse. 
Leaning forward, you press your face to his shoulder and melt instantly when he brings a hand to caress your hair. 
“I'm sorry,” you whisper, clenching your hand to feel the cool ring against your skin. “I don't know why I did that. I didn't mean to.”
“I know,” he soothes you just as softly. He stands up from the floor and carefully maneuvers the two of you so that you’re placed on his lap as he sits with his back against the headboard. “It's my fault. I'm sorry. I never meant to disregard your feelings like that.”
At the end of the day, both of you would rather set themselves ablaze than watch the other one hurting. 
You nod silently, heart pounding in your chest before you bring your arms up and throw them over his neck.
“I’m sorry I was so impulsive.”
“No. You did nothing wrong.” His soothing voice carries over the room, enveloping you with warmth. “I promise I'll be here whenever you want me to from now on. I don’t want you to feel neglected by me, especially now when you’re this stressed over the wedding. I won’t let you down, again.” 
“I just need a little help, that’s all,” you mumble tiredly into his skin.
“I know.” His warm lips press to your forehead lovingly. “I’m sorry for being an insensitive douche. It won’t happen again. I’ll take some days off next week, hm?”
The tears on your face dry slowly as your hold on him tightens. “I’d like that a lot.”
“Then it’s done. I'll be all yours and you’ll be all mine then,” he hums and noses at your cheek, finally bringing out a small giggle out of you. After all these years, he still melts at the sound. “I won’t let things get this out of hand again, YN. I promise.”
“Okay,” you whisper. Tilting your head up and bringing his down towards you, you join your lips in a kiss that you’ve been longing for for days. His movements are slow and careful as he tries to soak up as much of the moment as possible. 
His kisses slowly put your broken pieces back together. He never knew how much seeing you cry like this would hurt him. And he’ll make damn sure he won’t ever have to experience that again for as long as you're with him.
“If I have a life to spend, it'll only be with you, sweetheart,” he lowers his voice to match yours, cradling your cheek in the palm of his hand. “You're it for me. I'll never give you a chance to doubt that ever again.”
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PARK SUNGHOON
“You’re never home! There’s always a hundred things more important to you than spending an hour of your time with me. Your fucking fiance! Are we really about to get married when you’re clearly so tired of me already?”
Your heart pounds in your chest as you finally voice out everything that’s been sitting on your chest for the past month. Things have not been working out well with the two of you, much to your despair. He’s been neglectful, always too busy to help you with anything – even the wedding related things that you should’ve gotten done weeks ago. 
And you know that he’s swamped with work and it's not his fault. You understand everything. But to ask him to spare you an hour or two of his day shouldn’t be too much. It shouldn’t make him snap at you unlike what he just did the second he came back home. You slowly begin to lose your hope.
“God, have you always been this needy? Why can’t you accept that I can’t always put you first? No matter how much I’d want to, sometimes I just can’t! Deal with this!”
“Fucking- Fine.”
Your hand moves quicker than your brain, and the next thing you know, your shiny ring is being pulled off your finger and resting in the palm of your other hand. 
You can see the disbelief flashing through his face briefly before it completely morphs into a scowl. 
“You really think that this will solve the problem?” He asks, eyebrows narrowed as he glowers at you from across the room. “Really? Does that ring mean so little to you that you go and throw it away with any minor inconvenience?” 
You try to blink away the frustrated tears, hand raking up to brush your hair away from your face. “No, fuck, I just- I don’t know what to do anymore, Sunghoon. I feel like I’m the only one in this relationship. I need you to give me something more because whatever you’re doing now is not enough for me.”
“Well, I’m putting out everything I have, YN! I love you! If that’s still not good enough for you, then maybe it’s not meant to be.”
The silence that falls in the room doesn’t last long as your sudden sob pierces Sunghoon’s ears quickly, making his stomach drop to the soles of his feet. His heart wrenches and twists as the anger simmers down and evaporates from his body within a second, and he’s quickly coming back to his senses at the sight of you breaking down right in front of him. 
“Can’t you just try?” You cry into your hands, shielding your face away from your fiance. “That’s all I’m asking of you. Is it really so hard to try?”
No, it’s not. Sunghoon knows it without a second of thinking. It’s not too hard to try, never if it’s for you. And his throat dries so quickly when he basks in the weight of his words that finally made you break as well. 
“You don’t know how much it hurts to feel like you’re too much for your partner,” you wail with a small voice, shoulders trembling and hands quickly getting damp with tears. “You’ll never know how it is to feel unwanted, because you’ll never have to when you're with me. Because I love you, asshole, but now I’m doubting if you’re saying it back just for the sake of it.”
With air getting stuck in his throat, Sunghoon looks at you wide-eyed before quickly crossing the living room and enveloping you in his arms. His warmth wraps around you in what you've always considered to be safety, but now it just makes you cry more. 
He finds it hard to breathe. The hesitation in your eyes feels like a stab to his chest.
“Of course I still love you,” he says, voice muffled by your hair. 
He hates how he made you feel the opposite. He hates how you’re right and he never had to worry about any reassurement of such kind from your side because you’re just that good to him. And his heart breaks with the realization of how much of a lousy partner he’s been to you when all you ever were was nothing less than perfect.
So he places his hand on the back of your head and presses you even closer to his shoulder as you cry, his own eyes burning with tears at the sound of your sobs and sniffles. 
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, my darling,” he apologizes with a heavy heart, fearful of what’s about to come next. “I didn’t mean to neglect you this much. I could say that I’m tired and the work has been a lot lately, but I know these excuses are not enough to make up for my actions.”
You’re mad and hurt, but you love him and would never want to give up on him, so you wrap your arms around his middle and hold him almost as tight as he holds you, burying your wet face in his chest. 
“I love you more than anything, YN.” He pulls away from you only to cup your face and make you look at him. His long fingers wipe away the tears with gentle touch, soothing your stinging skin instantly. “You could never be too much for me. I want all of you. I promise I’ll do better. I’ll love you better.”
And when you’re looking up at him with these shiny eyes of yours, he closes the distance and presses a loving kiss to your swollen lips, hoping to take at least some of the pain away. He doesn’t think he can hold you any tighter. He can’t love you any stronger than right now, and it messes with his head how easily he could’ve had it all ruined only minutes ago. 
He’ll never take your love for granted ever again. Because if he did, he’d never be able to pick up the parts of whatever was left of him, and put himself back together ever again. 
You can feel his warm hand opening your closed palm before he takes the ring you've been clutching so tightly and holds it in between his fingers. 
“Can I put it back on, baby? Please.”
You nod wordlessly while you try to tame your tears. You hold your slightly trembling hand up to him. He takes it, gently, and watches as your bottom lip wobbles while he slides the ring on your finger just like he did months ago. 
“I'll never screw up like that again. You have my word for it.”
You sniffle quietly when he kisses you right on the cool band adorning your skin. “You better not, Park Sunghoon.”
His long fingers caress your cheek, wiping the remains of the tears away. “Can you forgive me, darling?”
You don't need to think long of an answer. “You know I can never stay mad at you. Even if you're a idiot, I'll never stop loving you. You have my whole heart, Hoon. Please, don't ever make me regret trusting you with it.”
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harrysfolklore · 1 month ago
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labyrinth - fc43
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summary: as the only female driver on the grid, everything in yn's life was planned like a perfect qualifying lap. then franco colapinto had to show up. first, he was just that annoying new guy who took her best friend's seat. then he became the driver she absolutely couldn't stand (or at least that's what she kept telling herself) word count: over 13k + social media posts
folkie radio: GUYYYYSSS SHE'S HERE! i started writing this fic in september and it's finally her time to shine!! this is my first time writing driver!reader so please be gentle with me. also, HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! may all of your wishes come true
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liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris and 1,027,537 others
yourinstagram p6 in zandvoort ! happy to see max on the podium for his home race. see you soon monza 🇮🇹
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username1 LEGEND
username2 p6 with that tractor feels like a podium finish fr
username3 give your seat to danny already
oscarpiastri Well done stinks 👊
↳ logansargeant Don’t praise her, her ego gets inflated
↳ username2 BEST TRIO ON THE GRID
↳ yourinstagram you’re both so jealous of me
redbullracing Keep pushing ! 💙
↳ username1 FIX HER FUCKING CAR
username4 p6 in a redbull? just hand the seat to someone more deserving
francolapinto Amazing 🙌🙌
↳ username2 franco is such a fannn
danielricciardo Proud of you 👌👌
↳ username1 haters want to create this beef between yn and danny for the seat but him adores her
maxverstappen1 Look she’s a nice teammate
↳ yourinstagram you adore me 😤
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A knot forms in your stomach as you read the messages. Something about the tone doesn't sit right with you. You quickly head towards Logan's motorhome, your mind racing and your axiety creeping in.
When you arrive, Oscar is already there, leaning against the wall with a concerned expression. Logan sits on the couch, his shoulders slumped and his gaze fixed on the floor.
"Logan?" you ask softly, stepping into the room. "What's going on?"
He looks up at you, then at Oscar, his eyes filled with a mix of anger and resignation. "I… I'm not coming back for the next race," he says, his voice barely above a whisper.
You feel like you've been punched in the gut. Deep down, a part of you had known this was coming. Rumors in the paddock spread faster than a Formula 1 car on a straight, and there had been whispers about Logan's seat for weeks. But you hadn't wanted to believe it. You'd pushed those thoughts aside, convinced that if you just ignored them, they wouldn't come true.
"What? What do you mean you're not coming back?"
Oscar pushes off the wall, his brow furrowed. "Mate, what happened?"
Logan takes a deep breath, running a hand through his hair. "Williams… they're replacing me. I'm out."
The room falls silent for a moment as the news sinks in. Then, all at once, you feel a surge of anger coursing through your veins.
"They can't do that!" you exclaim, your voice rising. "It's mid-season! You've been improving, you've been working so hard. How can they just… just throw you away like this?"
Logan shrugs, a bitter smile on his face. "Apparently, they can. And they have."
A wave of emotions come crashing to you. Anger at Williams for their decision, frustration at the ruthless nature of the sport, and an overwhelming sadness for Logan.
Oscar moves to sit beside Logan, placing a hand on his shoulder. "I'm so sorry, mate. This is bullshit."
You start pacing the room, your anger building with each step. "Who are they replacing you with? Some pay driver? Some rookie who's never even touched an F1 car?"
"Franco Colapinto," Logan says quietly.
You stop in your tracks, whirling to face him. "Colapinto? The F2 kid? Are they out of their minds?"
Oscar tries to interject, his voice calm. "YN, maybe we should-"
But you're too fired up to listen. "No, Oscar! This is wrong. It's so wrong. Logan deserves better than this. He deserves a chance to prove himself. How is he supposed to do that if they don't even give him a full season?"
Logan looks up at you, a mix of gratitude and sadness in his eyes. "I appreciate you having my back, stinks. But it's done. There's nothing we can do about it now."
You shake your head. "No, there has to be something. They can't just replace you with some F2 kid like that. They're out of their minds."
"YN," Oscar cuts in firmly. "I know you're angry. We all are. But right now, we need to be here for Logan. This isn't about us or what we think is fair. It's about supporting our friend."
As Oscar's words sink in, you feel a wave of guilt wash over you. He's right, of course. This isn't about your anger or your sense of injustice. It's about Logan, your friend who's just had his dream ripped away from him.
The three of you have been racing together since you were kids, climbing through the ranks side by side. You've shared victories and defeats, laughter and tears. You've pushed each other to be better, to chase your dreams relentlessly. And now, one of you is being left behind.
You take a deep breath, trying to calm yourself. "I just… I can't believe this is happening."
Logan manages a small smile. "It's okay, stinks. I appreciate your passion. It's one of the things I've always admired about you."
"Remember when we were in karting, and YN nearly got into a fist fight with that kid who tried to push Logan off the track?" Oscar says with a small smile, trying to light up the mood.
"How could I forget?" +
Logan chuckles softly, "She was like a tiny ball of fury."
You feel a smile tugging at your lips despite the situation. "Hey, nobody messes with my boys and gets away with it."
"And nothing's changed," Oscar adds, giving you a fond look. "We've always had each other's backs, through everything. This is not the exception."
Without another word, the three of you come together in a tight group hug, a physical representation of the bond you've shared for so many years.
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liked by logansargeant, oscarpiastri and 2,017,697 others
yourinstagram logan, you’re more than just a friend — you’re family. we’ve raced together since we were kids, dreaming of f1. to see that dream cut short for you is heartbreaking
your talent, dedication and kindness have always shone through. you deserved better than this mid-season swap. this sport can be cruel, but this feels especially unfair and i’m angry that my friend’s journey has been interrupted
but i’m also incredibly proud of you, logan. you have handled this with grace and strength and this isn’t the end for you — it’s just a detour. love you, stinks 🥲
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username1 IM SOBBING
username2 i still can’t believe this
username3 well hold your tears because you’re next
pierregasly Chin up, mate @/logansargeant you’re a champ 👊
alex_albon You will always be family @/logansargeant, It’s so sad to see you go
username4 that was cute now hand your seat to daniel or yuki
username5 THE FIRST PIC 🥺🥺 IM NOT OKAY
username6 oh she’s PISSED
username7 this is so unfair for logan
username8 colapinto has an enemy on track already and it’s her 😭
username9 the best trio will be incomplete now i’m not okay
username10 YOU NEXT BYE BYE
logansargeant Thank you for everything, go make me proud 💙
↳ username1 IM SOBBING AGAIN
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liked by francolapinto, landonorris and 410,764 others
williamsracing Franco Colapinto to race for the remainder of the 2024 season.
username1 VAMOOOS
username2 hello?? hes cute
username3 OKAY I SEE
username4 good thing for the team, sargeant was just not it
alex_albon Welcome to the fam @/francolapinto 👊
username5 KIIING
username6 an f1 kid who's not even top 5 right now in the championship? risky move
yourinstagram not even giving logan a proper goodbye? yall suck
THIS COMMENT HAS BEEN DETELED
username1 OMFG YN WE SAW THAT
username2 YN 😭😭
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Monza is always a race to look forward no matter what team you drive for, but today, your excitement is just not there.
The paddock feels different without Logan's presence, you have always raced alongside him, and not seeing his face during a race weekend feels wrong.
As you make your way through the bustling crowd, you can't help but feel a pang of sadness and anger. Inside the Red Bull hospitality area, you find Max already settled in, scrolling through his phone. He looks up as you approach, a sympathetic smile on his face.
"Hey, kiddo. How are you holding up?" he asks, gesturing for you to take a seat next to him.
"As well as can be expected, I guess," you slump into the chair, running a hand through your hair. "It just feels wrong, you know?"
"Yeah, I get it," Max nods, his expression thoughtful, "How's Logan doing? Have you talked to him?"
The mention of Logan's name ignites that spark of anger inside you again. "He's… he's putting on a brave face, but I know he's hurting. This whole situation is such bullshit, Max. Williams made a huge mistake."
Max raises an eyebrow, sensing the storm brewing beneath your calm exterior. "You want to talk about it?"
That's all the invitation you need. The words start pouring out of you, your voice rising with each sentence.
"It's just so unfair! Logan was improving every race. He was working his ass off, putting in the hours, doing everything the team asked of him. And for what? To be tossed aside mid-season for some rookie?"
Max tries to interject, "Well, Colapinto has been pretty impressive in F2-"
But you're on a roll now, barely registering his words. "Impressive in F2? So what? F1 is a whole different ball game. Logan was just starting to get comfortable, to really show what he could do. And now they've brought in this Colapinto kid who's never even driven an F1 car, who's probably a paid driver who's just going to waste everyone's times. What kind of message does that send?"
You stand up, pacing back and forth as you continue your rant. "Williams is making a huge mistake. They're throwing away all the work Logan put in, all the data they've gathered. For what? A gamble on some unproven talent? And don't even get me started on how they handled it. No warning, no real explanation. Just 'Thanks for your service, now get out.' It's disrespectful, it's short-sighted, and it's everything that's wrong with this sport sometimes."
Max watches you, a mix of concern and surprise on his face. He's never seen you this fired up before. "YN, I understand you're upset, but-"
"No, Max!" you interrupt him, "You don't understand because you'll never have the fear of having your seat taken from you out of nowhere. You're Max Verstappen. You're safe. But for the rest of us… we're always one bad weekend away from losing everything."
Max's brow furrows, clearly taken aback by your statement. "YN, that's not true. I worked hard to get where I am-"
"I know you did," you interrupt again, your voice softer now. "I'm not saying you didn't. But you have to admit, your position is different. You're a world champion. You're untouchable. But for drivers like Logan, like me… we're always looking over our shoulders, always wondering if this race will be our last."
Max is silent for a moment, processing your words. "I guess you're right, I've been in a secure position for so long, I forgot what it's like to worry about your seat." He pauses, then adds, "But you know, you're in a unique position too. You're the only woman driving a Formula 1 car. That's pretty special. You should feel-"
You cut him off, your frustration flaring up again. "Exactly! I'm the only woman here, Max. Do you have any idea how much more pressure that puts on me? Every move I make is scrutinized. Every-"
Before you can continue, you spot Franco Colapinto walking past the Red Bull area, chatting animatedly with his new race engineer. The sight of him in Williams colors sends another wave of resentment through you, and you turn away abruptly.
"I need some air," you mutter, storming out of the hospitality area, leaving a bewildered Max in your wake.
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The sun beats down as you stand next to Oscar on the flatbed truck, waiting for the drivers' parade to begin. The usual buzz of excitement surrounding Monza feels muted to you, overshadowed still by Logan's absence and the presence of his replacement.
"Oi, what's with the long face?" Oscar nudges you playfully with his elbow. "You look like someone stole your last Tim Tam."
"Oh shut up, you dork," you can't help but crack a small smile, "As if I'd ever let anyone near my precious Tim Tams."
"Too right," Oscar grins. "But seriously, how are you holding up?"
You shrug, trying to keep your expression neutral for the cameras. "Oh, you know, just peachy. Nothing like a bit of midseason drama to spice things up, right?"
"Always the optimist, aren't you?" Oscar rolls his eyes, "Come on, I bet you twenty quid you can't name all the Italian F1 circuits without googling."
"You're on, Piastri," you say, grateful for the distraction. "Monza, Imola, Mugello…"
As you're racking your brain for more, you notice Franco Colapinto approaching. Your playful mood evaporates instantly.
Franco's eyes widen as he gets closer, clearly starstruck. "Uh, hi," he says nervously. "I'm Franco. I just wanted to introduce myself."
Oscar, ever the diplomat, smiles and extends his hand. "Hey mate, welcome to F1. I'm Oscar."
Franco shakes his hand before turning to you, his expression one of barely contained awe. "And you're YN. I… I can't believe I'm actually meeting you. You're such an inspiration. The way you've broken barriers in this sport, it's incredible. I've followed your career since your F3 days and-"
You cut him off, your voice cool. "Thanks. Welcome to the grid."
Franco's smile falters, but he presses on. "I just wanted to say how much I admire what you've accomplished. You've paved the way for so many young drivers, especially women in motorsport. It's an honor to be racing alongside you."
You nod stiffly. "Thanks," you repeat, your tone making it clear that you're not interested in continuing the conversation.
An awkward silence falls over the group. Oscar, sensing the tension, tries to smooth things over. "So, Franco, how are you finding the step up to F1 so far?"
As Franco turns to answer Oscar, you take the opportunity to step away, moving to the other side of the truck. You can feel Oscar's gaze following you, but you can't bring yourself to engage in small talk with Logan's replacement, no matter how well-intentioned he might be.
As you're standing alone, Alex approaches, a sympathetic smile on his face. "Hey, mind if I join you?"
You shrug. "Free country, Albon. Or free truck, I guess."
Alex chuckles softly. "How are you doing? I know this can't be easy for you."
You sigh, your guard dropping slightly with Alex. "It's… complicated. I'm angry for Logan, but I know it's not Franco's fault. It's just…"
"It's the reality of the sport we're in," Alex finishes for you. "Trust me, I get it. Been there, done that, got the Red Bull rejection t-shirt."
Your stomach twists at the mention of that, suddenly remembering the endless conversations and warnings from your team. And how despite having a contract for next season, there's threats about your seat being take away after every race weekend. But you push the thought away.
"Always the comedian, aren't you?"
"Someone's got to keep the mood light around here," Alex grins. "But seriously, I know it's tough. Franco's a good kid, though. He's been working really hard, trying to learn as much as he can."
You nod, not quite ready to let go of your resentment but appreciating Alex's perspective. "How's he settling in?"
"As well as can be expected," Alex says. "He's got a lot to learn, but he's eager. It's a big step up from F2, but he's handling the pressure well so far."
You're about to respond when the parade starts moving. Alex gives you a supportive pat on the shoulder before moving back to his spot. As the truck rolls down the straight, the cheers of the Tifosi wash over you. You lift your hand to wave, a mix of emotions swirling inside you that go beyond just Logan's replacement.
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liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 1,638,578 others
yourinstagram p8. it is what it is. ciao monza 👋
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username1 you will always be the moment
username2 FIX THE FUCKING CAR ALREADY
username3 ouu shes DONEEE
username4 most undeserved seat on the grid i swear
username5 anyway RICBULL IS COMING
francolapinto Such a pleasure to race alongside you!
↳ username1 franco respects and admires her so much i love it
↳ username2 im pretty sure yn hates him tho
username6 the constructors championship is gone thanks to her
logansargeant Chin up, love you 💙
↳ username2 i miss them so much
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liked by username1, username2 and 12,739 others
f1gossip YN arriving at Red Bull HQ in Milton Keynes
Tensions running high as rumors swirl about potential driver shake-ups. Sources say YN’s recent performance has bosses considering options
Is the Honey Badger eyeing a comeback or could young Liam Lawson be making the leap to F1? 🤔
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username1 bro...
username2 they better fix her car NOW
username3 RICBULL RICBULL
username4 honestly the best thing for the team would be her getting replaced
username5 YAAAS SHE'S OUT FINALLY
username6 oscar is the only 2023 rookie who actually puts in the work
username7 some people need to start putting some respect on yn's name bc yall keep forgetting she was third in the championship and got her first win during her ROOKIE SEASON and the reason she's struggling rn is bc redbull is not getting their shit together
↳ username1 right??? they're just saying shit
↳ username4 you said it yourself, she has a championship winning car and she's not delivering. she should be out
username8 YN GET BEHIND ME
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liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris and 1,638,538 others
yourinstagram great quali, we should have some fun tomorrow 😚
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username1 SLAYYY
username2 p4 after all the nonsense surrounding her seat? feels right
username3 THE QUEEN OF BAKU FOR REAL
lilyzneimer my favorite supergirl 💙
username4 she got lucky
username5 don't care, we still want danny or liam in that seat
username6 enjoy the race bc it might be your last
username7 watch her on that podium tomorrow
logansargeant Super proud always
↳ username2 LOGAN WE MISSS YOUUUU
francolapinto 🤩
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liked by username1, logansargeant and 270,847 others
redbullracing Solid race and a bunch of points for the team 👊
Result 🏁PIA, LEC, YN P3, NOR, Max P5, ALO, ALB, COL, HAM, BEA
#F1 #RedBullRacing #AzerbaijanGP
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username1 SO DAMN TRUE
username2 yn back on the podium FINALLY
username3 yn saw the rumors about her seat and decided to shut them up
username4 SHES BEATING MAX FINALLY
username5 did they finally fix the car
username6 i don't want anyone commenting on her seat anymore
username7 i knew she got into that care absolutely PISSED
username8 QUEEN OF BAKU
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liked by oscarpiastri, francolapinto and 1,764,933 others
yourinstagram was that entertaining? 😙 so happy to be on the podium for osco's second win, i love you so muuuch you diva
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username1 LEGEND
username2 she's so smug
username3 TELL THEM QUEEEN
landonorris The third pic is definitely your best @/oscarpiastri
↳ yourinstagram IKR
↳ username1 I LOVE THEM
logansargeant Congrats to both of you @/oscarpiastri @/yourinstagram I'm always proud of everything you achieve ❤️
↳ username2 logan should be there too i'm sad now
↳ oscarpiastri Love you mate
↳ yourinstagram this paddock will never be the same without you
maxvertsappen1 🙌🙌 So proud of you little sister
oscarpiastri Love you stinks
francolapinto Congrats! Always an honor to race alongside you
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The drivers' briefing has just concluded, and you find yourself lingering in the room, chatting with your friends.
"I swear, I almost peed my pants at that press conference!," Lando says, his eyes widening as he recalls, "When Max and YN just sat there in silence, staring down the journalists… I thought I was going to lose it!"
Pierre chuckles, giving you a knowing look. "I knew YN was the mastermind behind that. It has her written all over it."
"Well, someone had to make a point about these ridiculous penalties," you can't help but grin.
The group's laughter is interrupted as Franco approaches, a tentative smile on his face. "Hey guys, mind if I join?"
The others welcome him warmly, and you feel a knot forming in your stomach. You force a tight smile, trying to keep your emotions in check.
"Franco, mate!" George exclaims, patting him on the back. "That was some impressive driving in practice. You're settling in well."
Alex nods in agreement. "Yeah, you're really holding your own out there. Williams made a good choice."
You feel your jaw clench at Alex's words, but you remain silent, watching as Franco's face lights up with pride and gratitude.
"Thanks, guys," Franco says, his voice humble. "I still have a lot to learn, but I'm giving it my all."
"Well, it's paying off," Lando chimes in, "Points in just your second race? You're pushing that Williams harder than we've seen in a while."
As the conversation continues, with each driver offering praise and encouragement to Franco, you feel your frustration and anger building.
The memory of Logan's disappointment and unfairness of it all, mixed with the ever present threat of you seat having the same fate, bubbles up inside you until you can't contain it anymore.
"And what about Logan?" you snap, your voice cutting through the friendly chatter like a knife. The group falls silent, all eyes turning to you in surprise. Franco's smile fades, replaced by a look of discomfort and guilt.
"YN…" Oscar starts, his tone cautionary.
But you're too fired up to stop now. "No, seriously. Everyone's so quick to praise him, but what about Logan? He was improving every race, working his ass off, and for what? To be tossed aside mid-season?"
The atmosphere in the room becomes tense. George and Alex exchange uncomfortable glances, while Pierre shifts uneasily.
Franco, looking distressed, speaks up. "I never meant for Logan to lose his seat. I just took the opportunity when it was offered to me. Any driver would have done the same."
"Oh, so that makes it okay?" his words only fuel your anger. "You just 'took the opportunity'? Do you have any idea how hard Logan worked for that seat? How much he sacrificed?"
"YN, that's enough," Oscar says firmly, placing a hand on your arm.
But you shrug him off, your eyes blazing as you face Franco. "You waltz in here, taking a seat you didn't earn, and everyone's falling over themselves to congratulate you. It's not right. It's not fair."
The room falls into a shocked silence. Franco looks like he's been slapped, his earlier excitement completely deflated. The other drivers are staring at you with a mix of surprise and disapproval.
It's George who finally breaks the tension. "YN, I think we all understand you're upset about Logan. We all are. But this isn't Franco's fault. He's just trying to make the most of his chance, like any of us would."
You feel a flush of shame creeping up your neck, but your anger is still simmering. "You don't understand," you mutter, but the fight has gone out of your voice.
Franco, looking genuinely distressed, takes a step towards you. "I'm sorry about what happened to Logan. I really am. I have nothing but respect for him, and for you. I never wanted to cause any problems."
His sincerity catches you off guard, and for a moment, you see not the driver who replaced your friend, but a young, talented kid trying to navigate a difficult situation. However, your anger and frustration gets the best of you.
"Whatever," you mumble, pushing past the group and out of the room, leaving a stunned silence as you disappear.
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liked by lewishamilton, alex_albon and 709,639 others
francolapinto still buzzing from singapore 🇸🇬growing up watching Lewis battle in marina bay and now getting to race wheel to wheel with him... surreal doesn't even begin to cover it 🤯 and that fight with YN for position was proper racing - those last few laps were intense! thank you to the team for giving me a car that could fight at the front. vamos 💪
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username1 he’s an f1 driver now but he’ll always be a fanboy
lewishamilton Good racing kid, you've got a bright future ahead 👊🏾
williamsracing Our boy! 💙
username3 Did anyone else notice how aggressive YN was when overtaking Franco? Almost pushed him into the wall...
↳ username1 fr she looked like she wanted to crash him
↳ username4 they were racing for position, that's what racing drivers do 🙄
username5 the way he always mentions YN in his posts but she never acknowledges him 👀
username6 that move from YN was unnecessarily aggressive, could've ended badly
landonorris Great drive mate!
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liked by yourinstagram, maxverstappen1 and 2,370,739 others
f1 BREAKING: Daniel Ricciardo to leave RB, the team have announced. Liam Lawson will race in place of Ricciardo for the remaining six races of the season for the team.
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username1 DANNY NOOOO
username2 this sucks man
danielricciardo Been a hell of a ride! Thank you RB family ❤️
maxverstappen1 Going to miss you mate!
username3 Wrong driver leaving... YN should be the one out
↳ username1 exactly! she's been underperforming all season
yourinstagram always grateful for everything you taught me DR. more than a driver - you've been a big brother, mentor, and friend since day one. going to miss our pre-race dance parties 🥺🤍
↳ username3 now give him your seat
↳ username1 it's no annoying to see that drivers like her have an undeserved contract extension and talented drivers get left out
↳ danielricciardo Love you kiddo! Make me proud
username5 Gutted to see Danny Ric go 💔
landonorris Won't be the same without you mate!
username7 @/yourinstagram Maybe focus more on racing than dancing 🙄
↳ username8 she's literally P5 in the championship, shut up
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As you step off the plane in Florida, the warm air envelops you, a stark contrast to the crisp autumn weather you left behind in Europe. Your heart lightens as you spot Logan waiting for you, his familiar grin a welcome sight after weeks of tension and stress. You missed your best friend so much.
You rush towards him, throwing your arms around him in a tight hug. "I missed you so much," you say, your voice muffled against his shoulder. "That paddock sucks without you."
Logan chuckles, returning the hug with equal enthusiasm. "I missed you too, stinks." He pulls back, a mischievous glint in his eye. "Now, let's grab a beer since you're out of race cars for a while."
You nod eagerly, letting him lead the way. He drives you to a nearby bar, one you've learned over the years of knowing him was the one he used to go to during his teenage years. The casual atmosphere is a refreshing change from the high-pressure environment of the paddock. As you settle into a booth with cold beers in hand, you feel some of the tension from the past few months start to melt away.
"So, how's life outside the F1 bubble?" you ask, taking a sip of beer.
Logan grins, leaning back in his seat. "It's… different. But not all bad. Actually, I've got some news." He pauses for dramatic effect. "I've been in talks with a few IndyCar teams."
Your eyes widen with excitement. "Logan, that's fantastic! Tell me everything!"
For the next hour, Logan animatedly describes his meetings with IndyCar team principals, the tracks he's excited to race on, and the new challenges he's looking forward to. You listen intently, genuinely happy for your friend's potential new chapter.
"It's not F1," Logan admits, "but it's a hell of a racing series. And who knows? Maybe it'll lead me back to F1 someday."
"I have no doubt," you assure him, raising your bottle in a toast. "To new beginnings!"
As the conversation flows, you find yourself relaxing more than you have in months. You chat about mutual friends, swap funny stories from your junior racing days, and discuss the latest paddock gossip.
Eventually, Logan's expression turns a bit more serious. "So, Oscar's been keeping me updated on what's been going on in F1. Sounds like things have been… tense with Franco."
You feel your mood shift at the mention of Franco's name. "Yeah, you could say that," you mutter, taking a long swig of your beer.
Logan leans forward, his voice gentle but firm. "YN, I know you're upset on my behalf, but you can't keep this grudge going forever. Franco's just a kid trying to make his way in the sport, like we all were not too long ago."
"I know, I know. It's just," you sigh heavily, "Every time I see him in the garage, in your overalls, talking to your engineers… it feels wrong, Logan. Like he's stolen something that belongs to you."
"But he didn't steal anything," Logan counters. "The team made a decision. It sucks for me, yeah, but that's not on Franco. He just took an opportunity that was offered to him. Can you honestly say you wouldn't have done the same in his position?"
You open your mouth to argue, then close it again. Logan has a point, and you know it.
"Look," Logan continues, "I've had some time to process all this, and I've come to terms with it. It's a cutthroat sport, YN. We all know that. Franco's not the villain here."
"But the way it happened," you protest, "mid-season, with no warning. It wasn't fair to you."
"Fair doesn't always come into it in F1. It just happens," Logan shrugs, "Besides," he adds with a hint of a smile, "I hear he's doing a decent job. The kid's got talent."
"He's alright," you grudgingly admit. "But he's not you."
Logan laughs. "No one's me, stinks. I'm one of a kind."
You can't help but crack a smile at that. "True enough."
"So," Logan says, his tone turning serious again, "can you promise me you'll try to ease up on Franco? Give him a fair shot? For me?"
You sigh deeply, considering his words. "I'll try," you finally concede. "But I'm not promising to be his best friend or anything."
"That's all I ask," Logan says, looking relieved. "Now, is this just about Franco replacing me, or is there something else going on? You seem… I don't know, more on edge than usual."
For a moment, you consider telling him about the talks with Red Bull, about the uncertainty surrounding your own seat. The words are on the tip of your tongue, but something holds you back. Maybe it's not wanting to burden Logan with your problems, or maybe it's not being ready to voice your fears out loud.
"No, nothing else," you lie, forcing a smile. "Just the usual F1 stress, you know how it is."
Logan nods, though he doesn't look entirely convinced. "Well, if there ever is anything, you know you can talk to me, right? Even if I'm not in the paddock anymore."
"I know," you say, feeling a pang of guilt. "Thanks, Logan. Really."
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yourinstagram florida !!! is one hell of a drug
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username1 AHHH she visited logan
logansargeant Next time we're doing the gator tour 🐊
↳ username2 i love them sm
oscarpiastri No invite for your favourite Aussie? Rude
↳ username2 we need the iconic trio together again
username3 they've been friends since forever, love how they support each other
username4 Logan and YN's friendship >>>>>
username5 Why is she on holiday when she should be working on her driving?
username6 the way logan always has her back 🥺
username7 surely there are better uses of time with 4 races left and her seat under threat?
francolapinto Amazing 🙌
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You arrive at the Red Bull hospitality area in Austin, the excitement of being back after the break palpable in the air. As you walk in, you spot Max lounging on one of the sofas, scrolling through his phone.
"Well, well, look who finally decided to show up," Max grins, looking up from his device. "Did you get lost in the Texas wilderness?"
You roll your eyes playfully, dropping your bag on a nearby chair. "Oh, I'm sorry, Your Highness. Did I keep you waiting? I was busy signing autographs for all my adoring fans. You know how it is… oh wait, you don't."
"Ouch, that hurt," Max clutches his chest in mock pain, "And here I was, about to show you something interesting, but now I'm not so sure you deserve it."
You raise an eyebrow, curiosity piqued. The banter with Max always helps you relax before a race weekend, and you've missed this during the break. "Oh come on, spill it, Verstappen. You know you want to. Don't make me steal your phone."
Max chuckles and pats the seat next to him. "Alright, alright. Sit down before you hurt yourself trying to reach my phone."
As you sit down, he pulls up a video on his phone. "Check this out. It's an interview with your biggest fan."
It's an interview with Franco. Your initial instinct is to look away, a mix of guilt and stubbornness rising in your chest. But something in Max's expression makes you watch.
"Lewis Hamilton and YN are my biggest idols in F1," Franco is saying, his face earnest. "The way YN races, her dedication and skill, it's truly inspiring. She's broken so many barriers and shown that talent knows no gender. I feel honored just to be on the same grid as her."
As the interview continues, Franco heaps more praise on you, his admiration clear in every word. You feel a twinge of guilt, remembering how cold you've been towards him. The genuine respect in his voice makes you uncomfortable, forcing you to confront your own prejudices.
"Her overtake on Leclerc in Interlagos last year? That was pure brilliance," Franco continues. "I've watched that move countless times, trying to learn from it. YN's not just a great driver, she's changing the face of the sport. I hope one day I can race wheel-to-wheel with her and show her the respect she deserves on track."
Max turns off the video and looks at you expectantly. "I think you owe someone an apology," he says, his tone gentle but firm.
You nod slowly, the realization sinking in. A wave of shame washes over you as you remember your cold behavior towards Franco. "I think I do," you admit, your voice barely above a whisper.
Max puts a comforting hand on your shoulder. "Hey, we all make mistakes. What matters is how we fix them. Franco's a good kid, and he really looks up to you. Maybe it's time to give him a chance?"
You sigh, running a hand through your hair. "I actually talked to Logan last week," you confess, watching Max's eyebrows rise in surprise. "He's doing well, actually - focusing on IndyCar now. But we talked a lot about… everything."
"Yeah?" Max shifts in his seat, clearly intrigued. It's not often you open up about these things.
"He basically told me I needed to stop fighting battles that weren't mine to fight. Said he appreciates me having his back, but Franco isn't the enemy here. He's just chasing his dream, like we all did. Logan said he remembers how it felt, getting his first chance - we all do."
Max nods thoughtfully. "Logan's right, you know. We've all been there at some point - getting an opportunity because someone else lost theirs. It's just how F1 works sometimes."
"I know," you admit, standing up. "And I've been unfair to Franco. He's actually doing a really good job with Williams, fighting in the midfield with a car that's not the easiest to drive. And here I am, making him feel unwelcome when I should be supporting talent. Some role model I am, right?"
"So what are you going to do about it?" Max asks, though his smile suggests he already knows.
You spot Franco heading towards the Williams hospitality area. "I'm going to make it right."
Walking over to Williams, you feel your heart pounding a little faster with each step. You find Franco sitting at one of the tables, going through data on his laptop with his race engineer.
"Franco?" you call out. "Could I steal you for a moment?"
He looks up, surprise evident on his face. "YN? Hi… yeah, of course." He glances at his engineer, who nods and excuses himself.
"Mind if I sit?" you ask, gesturing to the empty chair. When he nods, you take a deep breath. "I owe you an apology. A proper one."
Franco starts to shake his head, but you hold up a hand. "Please, let me finish. I've been unfair to you, and it wasn't right. I let my loyalty to Logan blind me to the fact that you're just a talented driver making the most of your opportunity. I've been cold, sometimes even hostile, and you didn't deserve any of that."
"I… thank you," Franco says quietly. "That means a lot. I want you to know, I reached out to Logan when-"
"I know," you interrupt gently. "He told me. That's partly why I'm here. You showed real class doing that, Franco. And you're doing a great job with the car. That P8 in Baku? That was proper racing."
A genuine smile breaks across his face. "Coming from you, that really means a lot. You know, I've watched your races since I was in F3. The way you fought through all the doubters, proved everyone wrong… you're really an inspiration."
You feel your throat tighten unexpectedly. "I had no idea."
"That's why your opinion means so much," Franco admits, fiddling with his water bottle. "When you seemed disappointed in me being here… it hurt, you know?"
"I'm sorry," you say again, meaning it more than ever. "How about we start fresh? Maybe you can talk me through that overtake in Baku - I noticed you used a similar line to what I did in Interlagos last year."
Franco's eyes light up. "You caught that? I actually studied your move while preparing for the race! The way you positioned the car on entry…"
You spend the next twenty minutes discussing racing lines and overtaking techniques, the earlier tension completely dissolved. Franco's enthusiasm is infectious, reminding you of your own early days in F1.
When you finally walk back to Max, you feel lighter than you have in months. He greets you with a knowing smile. "Feel better?"
"Much better," you admit. "Sometimes you need a kick in the right direction So thank you, I needed that wake-up call."
"Anytime," he smirks, throwing an arm around your shoulders, "Can't have my teammate being the paddock villain, can I? That's my job."
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yourinstagram rookies keeping us on our toes 😤 good battles today @/francolapinto
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username1 THIS IS LEGENDARY
username3 franco is going to piss his pants
williamsracing Our rookie giving the Red Bull a run for their money 💙
username4 she shouldn’t be acknowledging that a rookie in a williams is making it hard for her… embarrasing
username5 the start of YN and Franco's friendship? 👀
username7 the tension between these two was getting old, glad they're friends now
username8 HANDLE YOUR SEAT
username8 MY DUO 😭❤️
francolapinto Next time I won’t make it easy for you!
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The private jet hums quietly through the night sky towards Mexico City. Most of the other drivers are asleep, exhausted from the intense Austin weekend. You find yourself unable to sleep, your mind still racing from the events of the day. Glancing around the dimly lit cabin, you notice Franco is also awake, absently flipping through a magazine.
Catching your eye, he gives you a warm smile and moves to the empty seat across from you. "Can't sleep either?"
"Too much adrenaline still," you admit, adjusting your position to face him better. "Great drive today, by the way. That point was well-deserved."
Franco's face lights up at the compliment. "Thanks! Though it's nothing compared to your battle with Lando. I was watching it from behind and thought 'there's no way she's going to make that stick' but then you just… did. It was incredible."
You laugh softly, careful not to wake the others. "There was a moment there where I wasn't sure either. But sometimes you just have to go for it, you know?"
"Oh, I know exactly what you mean," Franco grins. "Like that time in F3 when I tried to go around the outside at Spa and ended up practically in another timezone."
"Please tell me there's video of that," you snicker.
"Unfortunately for my dignity, yes. I think my engineer still uses it as an example of what not to do."
The conversation flows naturally, jumping from racing stories to childhood memories. You find yourself genuinely enjoying his company, something that would have seemed impossible just a few weeks ago.
"So what made you want to be a racing driver?" you ask, genuinely curious.
As Franco launches into how he found his passion for the sport, you find yourself really looking at him properly for the first time. The soft cabin lighting catches the angles of his face, and you notice details you'd overlooked before. His eyes are warm with flecks of gold, crinkling slightly at the corners when he smiles. There's a small scar above his right eyebrow, barely noticeable unless you're paying attention. His dark hair is slightly disheveled from the long race day, a few strands falling across his forehead.
You catch yourself thinking how handsome he actually is, in that classic way. His animated expressions as he talks about racing make him even more attractive, his passion for the sport evident in every gesture.
"...and that's when I knew I wanted to do this forever," he finishes, then looks slightly embarrassed. "Sorry, I'm rambling. I tend to get carried away when talking about racing."
"No, don't apologize," you say quickly. "It's refreshing to see that kind of enthusiasm. Some of the guys get so jaded after a while."
Franco's smile turns a bit shy. "Speaking of enthusiasm, I'm really excited about racing in Mexico this weekend. It's one of my favorite cities - the atmosphere is just incredible."
"The fans are amazing there," you agree. "Though I still haven't found a really good place to eat in Mexico City. The hotel restaurant gets old pretty quickly."
Franco's eyes light up. "Oh, you have to let me help with that! I know a couple of amazing restaurants in the city. There's this incredible place that serves the best traditional dishes you've ever tasted, and another one in that does contemporary Mexican cuisine that would blow your mind."
You find yourself intrigued, both by the suggestion and the eager way he's describing it. "That sounds way better than room service."
"We could..." he hesitates for a moment, then continues with determination, "we could go together, if you'd like? After Thursday's media duties maybe? I'd love to show you my favorite spots."
There's something endearing about the way he's trying to sound casual while clearly being nervous about asking. You feel a flutter in your stomach that you definitely weren't expecting.
"You know what? That sounds great," you say, surprised by how much you mean it. "It's about time I experienced proper Mexican cuisine."
Franco's face breaks into a brilliant smile. "Perfect! I'll make a reservation for Thursday evening then. Trust me, you won't regret it."
As the conversation continues, you can't help but notice how natural it feels now, how easily you're laughing at his jokes and sharing stories. It's hard to believe this is the same person you were avoiding just a few weeks ago.
As other drivers start stirring from their sleep, Franco returns to his original seat, but not before confirming your dinner plans one more time.
Watching him walk away, you find yourself looking forward to Thursday evening more than you probably should. It's just dinner with a colleague, you tell yourself, even as you catch yourself smiling at the thought of it.
"Just dinner," you whisper to yourself, but somehow, you're not entirely convinced.
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yourinstagram has added to their close friends stories
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replies:
georgerussell63 So that was all the giggling I heard during the flight
oscarpiastri I’m so telling Logan
maxverstappen1 Can I say “I told you so” now?
francolapinto close friends privileges already? wow
↳ yourinstagram don’t push it colapinto
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The hotel lobby is relatively quiet as you wait for Franco, having agreed to meet there before heading to the restaurant. You've opted for casual - a simple black dress that makes you feel confident but not overdressed.
"Ready to have your mind blown by the best food in Mexico City?" Franco's voice makes you turn. He's wearing dark jeans and a well-fitted navy button-down, and you try not to notice how good he looks.
"Big claims require big proof," you tease, falling into step beside him.
"Well, well, what do we have here?" Lando's familiar accent cuts through the lobby. He's just coming in from what looks like a gym session, and his surprised smirk makes you want to roll your eyes. "Interesting dinner plans?"
"Just showing YN the local cuisine," Franco says smoothly, though you notice his ears turning slightly pink.
"Right, right," Lando drawls, his eyes dancing with amusement. "The local cuisine. In your nice shirt. At that fancy place you've been talking about for weeks-"
"Goodbye, Lando," you cut him off, grabbing Franco's arm and steering him toward the exit, trying to ignore Lando's knowing chuckle behind you. You knew it was a matter of time before the entire grid finds out you went out with Franco.
The restaurant is everything Franco promised and more. The conversation flows easily between you, and you find yourself charmed by the way he seamlessly switches between Spanish and English while ordering, the way he leans in slightly when you're talking, the way his hand occasionally brushes yours across the table.
"No way," you laugh, taking another sip of wine. "You did not challenge your friend to a dance-off."
"I absolutely did," Franco grins. "And I won, by the way. Though there might have been some tequila involved."
"I would pay good money to see that."
"Play your cards right," he says with a playful wink, "and maybe you'll get a private demonstration."
The flirtatious comment catches you off guard, and you feel heat rise to your cheeks. Franco seems pleased with this reaction, his confidence growing throughout the evening.
The evening continues, warm and comfortable. Franco insists on ordering dessert - "You haven't lived until you've tried their churros con chocolate" - and you find yourself sharing stories between bites of perfectly crispy churros.
"So," Franco says, wiping chocolate from his lip with a napkin, "you, Oscar, and Logan - that's quite the trio. How did that happen?"
You laugh, fondly remembering those early days. "We practically grew up together in karting. I was this tiny kid trying to prove myself, Oscar was already sassy even at eight years old, and Logan… well, Logan was Logan."
"Let me guess - immediate chaos?" Franco grins.
"Oh, absolutely. We used to drive our parents and coaches crazy. These three kids who wouldn't stop racing each other even after practice was over." You smile at the memory. "We've been inseparable ever since. Though now Logan's living his best life in Florida."
Franco's eyes soften. "You really miss having him in the paddock, don't you?"
"Yeah," you admit quietly. "I do. But he's happy, and that's what matters. Plus, he texts me stupid memes at least twenty times a day, so it's like he never left."
After asking for the bill — one that Franco didn't let you pay no matter how much you insisted — you decided to walk back to the hotel. You were aware that his hand was close to yours as you walked side by side, almost brushing your fingers, but you didn't dare to take that step, and neither did he.
You reach the hotel, but instead of heading straight for the elevators, Franco suggests taking the scenic route through the garden. The night is too nice to end just yet.
"I have to say," he remarks as you walk, "you look beautiful tonight. That dress is…" he makes an exaggerated chef's kiss gesture, making you laugh.
"Smooth, Colapinto. Very smooth."
"I try," he winks, and you roll your eyes but can't hide your smile.
The walk to your room comes too quickly. Outside your door, Franco turns to you with a soft smile.
"Thank you for tonight," he says. "It was… nice. Really nice."
"It was," you agree, finding yourself meaning it completely. "Thank you for showing me your favorite spot."
There's a moment where you both just look at each other, the air charged with something unspoken. Franco takes a small step closer, then seems to think better of it.
"Goodnight, YN," he says softly, squeezing your hand once before letting go.
"Goodnight, Franco," you reply, watching him head down the hallway.
As you close the door behind you, you lean against it, smiling to yourself. You can already hear Max's smug "I told you so" tomorrow, but somehow, you can't bring yourself to care.
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f1gossip🚨 Franco Colapinto and YN spotted having dinner together in Mexico City. They spent over two hours at the restaurant according to witnesses.
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username2 This is getting interesting... 👀
username3 STOP I'M CRYING 😭❤️
username4 they're just friends guys, calm down
username4 the way he makes her laugh though!!!
username5 watch how they'll deny everything tomorrow
username6 MY HEART CAN'T TAKE THIS
username8 this has to be more than just friendship...
username10 I MANIFESTED THIS
username12 focus on racing instead of dating maybe?
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The Brazilian rain hammers down relentlessly on the Interlagos circuit. It's barely 6 AM, but the paddock is already buzzing with nervous energy for the early sprint qualifying. You stifle a yawn as you check your phone for what must be the hundredth time that morning. Another message from Franco pops up - a picture of himself looking comically miserable in the rain with the caption "Maybe if we all pretend we didn't see the rain, they'll cancel quali?"
The past week has been unexpected in the best way possible. After that dinner in Mexico, something shifted. What started as sharing breakfast in the hotel turned into spending every free moment together. During the long flight to São Paulo, George had dramatically sighed and switched seats with Franco, muttering something about "not being able to take the longing looks across the plane anymore."
"Someone's cheerful for 6 AM," Max comments, walking into the garage as you quickly type a response to Franco. "Let me guess - Argetinian company keeping you entertained?"
You try to hide your smile but fail miserably. "Shut up and focus on qualifying."
"Oh, I'm focused," he grins. "Unlike someone who keeps looking at their phone every two minutes."
"I'm just-"
"YN," Max interrupts, counting off on his fingers, "he waited outside our debrief yesterday just to walk you to dinner. He somehow always knows your coffee order. And don't think I didn't notice him giving you his jacket yesterday."
You feel your cheeks heat up. "We're just friends."
"Right," Max smirks. "Friends. Like how Charles and I are 'just friends' when we're trying to punt each other off track."
"Shut up, as if you weren't secretly in love with each other."
A few hours later, as you prepare for the drivers' parade, Oscar sidles up next to you with his trademark grin.
"Well, well, if it isn't the stranger," he says dramatically. "Remember me? One of your best friends? Though I suppose you wouldn't know, being attached at the hip with a certain Williams driver these days."
You roll your eyes, but there's no heat in it. "Miss me that much, Piastri?"
"Just saying, used to be we'd get coffee before parade, now it's all 'Sorry Oscar, Franco already got me coffee,'" he mimics your voice terribly.
You're about to retort when Franco appears, and Oscar's grin widens. "And that's my cue. Have fun, kids!" He winks before sauntering off.
"Ignore him," you say when you notice a small smile in Franco's face, "He's the perpetual pain in my ass."
"He's okay," Franco says, standing closer to you. You're trying to get your hair in order when you realize something's missing.
"Shit," you mutter, patting your pockets. "I forgot my hair tie."
"You always braid it before races, right?"
"Yeah," you sigh, still searching. "I'm stupidly superstitious about it. Haven't gotten into the car without a perfect braid since F3."
"Here," Franco pulls a hair tie from his wrist. At your surprised look, he shrugs. "I started carrying one after Mexico. Just in case," he shrugs, as if he was saying the most obvious thing ever, "Turn around."
"You know how to braid hair?"
"Sisters, remember? I'm practically a professional." His fingers are gentle as they work through your hair. "Besides, can't have you breaking your streak because of a missing hair tie."
You're acutely aware of the other drivers watching with varying degrees of amusement. Lewis gives you a knowing wink as he passes, while Charles not-so-subtly elbows Oscar and gestures toward you two.
"There," he says finally, securing the end with your hair tie. "Perfect braid for perfect racing."
You reach back to feel it - it is indeed perfect. When you turn to thank him, you find him much closer than expected, his eyes soft as they meet yours.
"Show off," you manage to say, trying to ignore the way your heart is racing.
"Only for you," he replies with a wink, and you hear what sounds suspiciously like Alex whispering "Just kiss already" to George.
The moment is broken by the announcement for drivers to take their places on the parade truck. As you climb aboard, you catch Oscar making exaggerated swooning gestures at you, while Max simply mouths "Just friends?" with a knowing smirk.
Franco takes his place beside you on the truck, close enough that your shoulders touch, and somehow you find you don't really care who's watching.
"Nice braid, by the way," Charles calls out teasingly from behind you. "Franco, think you could do mine next time?"
"Get your own hair stylist, Leclerc," you call back, and Franco's laugh next to you makes everything - the bad qualifying, the rain, the teasing - worth it.
The truck starts moving, and Franco's hand finds yours, hidden from view between you. You intertwine your fingers with his, and neither of you let go for the entire parade.
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f1_insider🚨 Christian Horner spotted leaving Williams hospitality after a 2-hour meeting in Brazil. This comes amid increasing speculation about driver changes for 2025.
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username1 They're not even trying to be subtle anymore…
username2 leave YN alone challenge
username3 Franco to Red Bull confirmed? 👀
username5 WAIT WHAT
username7 the timing of this… right before quali 😬
username8 everyone acting surprised like this hasn't been brewing for weeks username11 They're trying to destabilize her before the race
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yourinstagram brazil never disappoints. p15 ➡️ p2. proud of this one.
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username1 IM STILL CRYING
username2 MIC DROP
maxverstappen1 Proper racing today 💪🏻 That defense in the last 10 laps 🔥Love you kiddo, couldn't ask for a better teammate
↳ username1 max said SHE'S NOT GOING ANYWHERE
danielricciardo THIS IS WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT! That's my girl!
username3 EVERYONE'S PRIDE AND JOY
username4 she got lucky and still no win this season
landonorris Absolute monster in the wet
logansargeant THAT'S MY BEST FRIEND
username5 this is why she deserves that seat
username6 where are all the haters now? 🤫
username7 that battle through the midfield was masterclass
username8 Silencing critics in the best way possible
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f1gossip YN's radio messages during Franco's crash show a different side to their "rivalry." Listen to how her voice changes when she finds out it's him. Sometimes the real feelings come through in moments like these.
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username2 this doesn't sound like someone who "hates" him
username3 top I'm crying 😭
username4 "tell me he's okay" broke me
username6 forget the rivalry narrative, that's genuine concern
username7 MY DRIVERS STOOOOP
username8 this is the most emotion we've heard from her all season
username9 notice how she's been cold towards him for weeks but the second he's in danger…
username10 SOMETHING SHIFTED
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The easy banter has become your normal over the past week. Ever since Brazil, where you fought your way from P15 to P2 in treacherous conditions, something has shifted between you. The walls you'd carefully maintained started crumbling during that rain-soaked weekend.
Your phone buzzes again - this time it's Christian Horner requesting a meeting. Your stomach tightens instinctively. These meetings have become more frequent throughout the season, always with subtle undertones about your future with the team.
Franco: "Meeting with James in 10. Wish me luck not falling asleep in the sim debrief. Call you after?"
You: "Sure, good luck x"
The 'x' slips out before you can stop it - you've never added that before. Your finger hovers over the delete button, but he's already seen it.
Franco: "Did THE YN just send me a kiss? Screenshots being taken. This is historic
You're still smiling about your early interaction with Franco when you walk into Christian Horner's office, but his expression is serious enough to make your smile fade. You've been here before - these "casual meetings" that could determine your future.
"YN, thanks for making time," he gives a polite smile, "Please, take a seat."
You sit, trying to read his expression. Last week's podium trophy sits on a shelf behind him - your trophy, earned after fighting through half the grid.
"As you're aware, your contract includes certain performance clauses. While your recent results, particularly Brazil, have been impressive, we need to consider all options for the team's future."
That familiar knot in your stomach returns. "What kind of options?"
"I was at Williams recently," Christian says carefully, "discussing various possibilities, including Franco Colapinto."
The world seems to tilt slightly. Franco. At Williams. Meeting about possibilities. Just like with Logan.
"I got P2 in Brazil," you say, hating how defensive your voice sounds. "Started P15. In the rain. I battled with the entire grid while also defending for Max to secure a double podium."
"Yes, and it was an exceptional drive-"
"I'm fifth in the championship. I've scored podiums consistently despite the car being a nightmare to drive most of the times. What more do I need to do?"
Christian's expression remains neutral. "This isn't about any single result, YN. We need to evaluate all potential scenarios for the team's future."
"So you're considering replacing me," you say flatly. "With Franco."
"I trust you understand this is just business, YN," Christian says as you stand to leave. "We have to explore every option."
You pause at the door, turning back slightly. "Of course. Business." Your voice is perfectly controlled. "Just like my P2 in Brazil was business. My podiums were business. Everything I've given to this team has been business."
"YN-"
"No, I get it. Really." You manage a smile that doesn't reach your eyes. "If you'll excuse me, I have some sim work to review."
It hits you as you drive back to your apartment - every friendly conversation, every shared coffee, every late-night text… none of it was real. Franco isn't your friend. He's just another driver who sees you as an obstacle to overcome, a seat to claim. Just like everyone else since you entered F1, smiling to your face while plotting to take what's yours.
Back in your apartment, your phone keeps lighting up with Franco's messages, each one making your chest tighter. You can't bring yourself to block him - that feels too much like acknowledging how much this hurts. Instead, you just... stop responding. Set the phone aside. Focus on your laptop, on race data, on anything else.
Your phone rings - Oscar's familiar face popping up on the screen.
"Finally!" he exclaims when you answer. "I've been trying to reach you all day. You missed the most hilarious thing - Lando tried to make vegemite pasta."
Despite everything, you find yourself smiling. "Please tell me someone filmed it."
The conversation flows easily, almost making you forget about everything else. Almost.
"Oh yeah," Oscar adds casually, "ran into Franco at paddle today. He seemed pretty worried-"
"He better focus on preparing for his Red Bull seat instead."
"His what?" Oscar sounds confused. "Stinks, what are you on about?"
"Horner had meetings at Williams. About Franco. About possibilities. Sound familiar?"
"Hang on, hang on. Did you even talk to Franco about this? Because he genuinely seemed concerned-"
"Of course he seemed concerned, Os. That's the whole point."
"YN, I know you. You're doing that thing where you push people away before they can hurt you. But stinks, I really don't think-"
"I have to go. Sim data to review."
"At least talk to him-"
You end the call, turning back to your laptop. Three races left. Three chances to prove everyone wrong. No more distractions, no more letting your guard down.
You'll do it the only way that matters in F1 - on track, where lap times speak louder than friendly texts, and championship points mean more than shared coffee breaks.
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You've managed three weeks. Three weeks of perfectly crafted indifference, of calling him "the Williams driver" in interviews, of taking different routes through the paddock just to avoid those chance encounters that used to make your heart skip. Three weeks of pretending you don't miss his stupid sparkle messages, or the way he always saves you a coffee during early practice sessions.
But now your hands won't stop shaking as you stare at your dark phone screen, trying to ignore the screens showing the mangled Williams in the Las Vegas Strip. You've watched the replay seventeen times without meaning to, each time feeling your heart stop at the impact.
"This is getting ridiculous," Max's voice is quiet beside you, making you jump. You didn't even hear him approach. "Stop with this nonsense."
"I'm fine," you respond automatically, thumb still pretending to scroll on your black screen. "Just checking the timing sheets."
"Your phone isn't even on." Max's hand appears, gently taking the phone from your trembling grip. "They've taken him to UMC. Just go."
"I can't," you whisper, finally looking up at your teammate. You hate how your voice catches. "Everyone will—"
"Who cares what everyone will say?" Max interrupts, already reaching for your bag. "Hannah's got a car waiting. Go."
"I don't want to," you protest weakly, but even you can hear how unconvincing it sounds. "I don't need to—"
"Stop," Max's voice is firm but gentle. "You're not going back to this. Not after everything. You care about him, stop pretending you don't."
You take a shaky breath, then nod once. You're out of the garage before you can change your mind and rebuild those walls you've spent three weeks perfecting. Because Max is right – you do care. You care so much it terrifies you. And right now, nothing else matters except knowing he's okay.
You hate hospitals. You've spent too many hours in them after your own crashes, but somehow this is worse. Standing outside his room, you're suddenly unsure of everything. Three weeks of carefully constructed distance seems ridiculous now.
"You can come in instead of hovering at the door," Franco's voice carries from inside, slightly hoarse but still holding that hint of amusement that always used to drive you crazy. "Unless you're planning to run away again."
You step inside, trying to maintain some composure even as your heart clenches at the sight of him. "I wasn't running away," you say automatically, but it sounds weak even to your ears.
"No?" He raises an eyebrow, wincing slightly at the movement. "So you just happened to take different paddock routes?"
"Franco—"
"It's back to Franco now? Not 'the Williams driver'?" There's hurt beneath his teasing tone, and it makes your chest tight. "That last interview was particularly cold, by the way. Very convincing."
You stay by the door, arms crossed. "I thought that's what everyone wanted. Space. Distance. Rivalry."
"You're here now though."
"Max made me come," you lie.
"Sure he did." Franco's small smile tells you he sees right through you. "Nothing to do with how many times you asked if I was okay over the radio?"
You feel your cheeks heat up. Of course he's heard the radio already. "I would have asked about any driver."
"YN," his voice softens, and it breaks something in you. "Stop pretending. Please. I miss my friend."
The last words hit you hard, and you finally let your arms drop, taking a step closer. "I miss you too," you whisper, and it feels like admitting defeat and victory all at once. "I was so scared when I saw the crash."
"Come here," he says quietly, patting the edge of the bed.
You hesitate for just a moment before crossing the room, carefully sitting beside him. "I'm sorry," you say softly. "For these past weeks. For being harsh. For—"
"I know," he interrupts, his hand finding yours. "I know. But you're here now."
You squeeze his hand gently, feeling the walls you've built crumbling completely. "You could have died today and I would have never—" you stop yourself, running your thumb over his knuckles without thinking. "All because of this stupid seat."
Franco's quiet for a moment, then lets out a small laugh that turns into a wince. "Is that what you think? That I'm after your seat?"
"Aren't you?" You try to pull your hand away but he holds on. "The meetings with Christian, the—"
"YN," he interrupts, waiting until you look at him. "I never got any offers from RedBull.”
You freeze. "What?"
"I'm not taking your seat," he says softly. "In fact, I still don't have a seat."
"But...the meetings with Horner?" You're struggling to process this. "He basically told me they were considering options for next season, and those options were you in my seat."
"Sounds to me that he was pressuring you." His eyes hold yours. "My team had meetings with RedBull, yes. But we never got a solid offer, not even for VCARB."
You feel slightly dizzy. Three weeks of avoiding him, of building up walls, of convincing yourself he was just another driver trying to take your seat...
"I'm an idiot, aren't I?" you finally manage.
"Well, you've taken the long way through the paddock just to avoid me," he teases, then becomes serious. "I wouldn't hurt you like that. You know that. Or at least, you used to."
"I got scared," you admit quietly. "When I heard about the meetings, I just... it was easier to push you away than to admit that I care about you."
The silence that follows feels heavy with everything unsaid. Finally, Franco squeezes your hand gently.
"Well," he says softly, "nearly dying seems to have worked out well for me then."
"That's not funny," but you're fighting a smile.
"Made you come see me though, didn't it?"
"I hate you," but there's no heat in it.
"No, you don't," he says confidently. "You just admitted you care about me. No taking it back now."
You roll your eyes but don't deny it. "How are you feeling, really?"
"Like I crashed a car at 200mph," he grins, then softens. "Better now though."
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liked by francolapinto, maxverstappen1 and 1,908,479 others
yourinstagram champion x4 🏆so proud to be part of this journey. no one deserves it more than you @/maxverstappen1. thank you for being the best teammate anyone could ask for, on and off track.
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username1 IM CRYINGGGGG
username2 this is my family
maxverstappen1 Couldn't ask for a better teammate and bonus little sister. Thanks for having my back all season 💪🏻
↳ username1 HE SAID SHE'LL ALWAYS BE MY TEAMMATE
danielricciardo Look at my kids making me proud 🥹
christianhorner Fantastic team effort all year. Proud of both of you.
↳ username1 FIX HER CAR AND STOP FEEDING HER TO THE PRESS!!
username5 the way max waited to celebrate until she crossed the finish line
username6 remember when they said they wouldn't get along
username7 brother sister energy we love to see it
francolapinto Amazing work 🙌
↳ username8 bro ready to take her seat
username9 their relationship is too pure. max adores her like she's his little sister and yn would take a murder charge for him pretty much
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After showering and changing post-race, you're walking back to your hotel room when your phone buzzes. Franco's name lights up the screen: "Hey... could you come to my room? Need to get my mind off today. Room 412."
You hesitate only briefly before responding. After everything that's happened - the crash, the hospital, the conversations that followed - things between you have felt different.
Qatar had been grueling, you managed to score a solid P4 but the story for Franco had been different. He was part of a collision during turn one that ended his race right there. You heard it on the radio and your heart couldn't help but ache for him.
When you knock, Franco opens the door looking drained, his usual spark dimmed by the day's events. He's changed into soft sweatpants and a team shirt, hair still damp from his shower.
"That bad, huh?" you say softly, following him into the room.
He drops onto the bed with a sigh. "First lap incidents are the worst. All that preparation, all those hours in the sim… gone in seconds."
You settle into the armchair across from him. "I saw the replay. That wasn't your fault - Hulkenberg came across way too aggressively."
"Doesn't matter whose fault it was. Points are points, and I need them." He runs a hand through his hair, a gesture you've come to recognize as stress. "The pressure's getting intense. Everyone keeps asking about next year's plans, and I just… I don't know."
"Hey," you say gently, moving to sit beside him. "You're one of the most talented drivers out there. Everyone sees it."
"Do they?" His voice is uncharacteristically vulnerable. "Because right now it feels like every mistake is being magnified. One DNF and suddenly everyone's questioning if I deserve the seat."
"I know that feeling too well," you admit. "I mean, I spent three weeks avoiding you because I thought you were after my seat."
That draws a small laugh from him. "Not my finest moment in the hospital, guilt-tripping you about it."
"It worked though, didn't it?" you nudge his shoulder playfully, "Plus, I guilt tripped you about Logan's seat for the longest time, it's only fair."
"Yeah, well, I was desperate. Do you know how hard it was watching you take different routes through the paddock just to avoid me?"
"About as hard as it was taking those routes," you say softly. "I missed you."
"You did manage to find some creative paths though," he teases, his mood lightening slightly. "I particularly enjoyed watching you duck behind Lando in the airport."
"I did not duck!"
"You absolutely did. Practically dove behind him. Poor guy had no idea why you suddenly needed an urgent conversation about sim settings."
You feel your cheeks heat up. "Well, what about you? Mr. 'Oh sorry, I didn't see you there' when we literally made eye contact in the media pen?"
"That was Oscar's fault! He told me my hair looked weird and I got distracted."
"Your hair always looks weird."
He gasps in mock offense. "Take that back! This hair has its own fan accounts."
"Yeah, horror fan accounts maybe," you tease.
"Says the person who needed my expert braiding skills before races."
"Which you learned from your sisters, if I remember correctly?"
His expression softens. "Actually… I might have YouTube'd it after Mexico."
That catches you off guard. "You… what?"
"Yeah," he rubs the back of his neck, suddenly looking sheepish. "Spent like three hours practicing on a rope I found in the gym. Alex caught me and wouldn't stop laughing."
"That's…" you feel something warm bloom in your chest. "That's actually really sweet."
"Don't tell anyone," he grins. "I have a reputation to maintain."
"Oh yeah? What reputation is that?"
"You know, cool, mysterious, definitely not the type to watch hair braiding tutorials."
You laugh. "Hate to break it to you, but anyone who's seen you try to work the coffee machine knows you're not mysterious."
"That machine is complicated!"
"It has three buttons!"
"Three very confusing buttons," he protests. "Besides, you're the one who always shows up right when I'm struggling with it."
"Pure coincidence."
"Right," he smirks. "Just like how you 'coincidentally' started showing up earlier to breakfast after I mentioned that's when I usually go?"
You feel your cheeks warm again. "I just… wanted to beat the rush."
"The rush of exactly two other drivers who eat that early?"
"Shut up," you mutter, but you're smiling.
The air between you changes, becomes charged with everything unsaid. You're suddenly very aware of how close you're sitting, how his eyes have dropped to your lips.
He doesn't say anything else, instead, he leans forward and kisses you, soft and careful, like he's afraid you might pull away. His hand comes up to cup your cheek, and you feel yourself melting into the touch.
When he pulls back, you blink at him, slightly dazed. "You kissed me."
His familiar smirk returns, though his eyes remain soft. "Well done, Sherlock."
You roll your eyes at his sass, but can't help smiling. This time, you're the one who leans in, capturing his lips with yours. The kiss is deeper, more certain. His hand slides into your hair as you press closer, and you feel him smile against your mouth.
"You know," he says softly, playing with a strand of your hair, "besides being one of my racing idols, you've also always been my crush."
You pull back slightly, raising an eyebrow. "Really?"
"Don't let it go to your head," he grins.
"Oh my god," you laugh. "You were such a fan! Did you have posters too?"
He groans, hiding his face in your shoulder. "I'm never telling you anything again."
"No, no, this is great," you tease. "I'm just a year and a half older than you, Colapinto, and you completely idolized me."
"I hate you," he mumbles into your shoulder.
"No you don't," you say confidently. "You just admitted you had a crush on me."
He lifts his head, eyes sparkling with that familiar mischief. "Still do, actually. Although the real you is much more annoying than poster you."
"Poster me didn't call you out on your coffee machine struggles."
"Poster you was much nicer," he agrees, but he's smiling as he leans in to kiss you again.
This kiss is slower, deeper, filled with everything you've both been holding back. When you finally pull apart, you rest your forehead against his.
"Been wanting to do that for a while," he admits softly.
"Even when I was avoiding you? Or giving you crap to defend my best friend's honor?"
"Especially then. Do you know how adorable you looked trying to pretend you didn't see me in the paddock?"
"Shut up," you laugh.
"Never," he grins, pulling you closer. "I have years of fan stories to make up for."
You kiss him again just to shut him up, but you can feel him smiling against your lips, and you think maybe, just maybe, this is exactly where you're meant to be.
"You're never going to let me live down the fan thing, are you?" he asks when you break apart.
"Not a chance," you smirk. "I bet Alex has pictures of you practicing those braids too."
"Don't you dare!"
But you're already reaching for your phone, laughing as he tries to grab it from you, and somehow you end up tangled together on the bed, both laughing too hard to care about anything else.
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You're halfway through your coffee when Franco appears, wearing his team polo and that signature grin that used to irritate you but now makes your stomach flutter. It's still surreal how much has changed - from despising him for taking Logan's seat, to avoiding him over your seat rumors, to… whatever this is now. He slides into the seat next to you, leaning in for a kiss. You quickly place a hand on his chest, pushing him back playfully.
"Easy there, hotshot," you tease. "Let's keep it professional."
"Professional?" He raises an eyebrow, that mischievous glint in his eyes. "Come on, don't be shy now. Not after last week."
You feel your cheeks warm at the memory. "Last week was different. We were alone."
"Oh, so that's the rule? Only when we're alone?" He leans closer, lowering his voice. "Should we discuss what else happened when we were alone?"
"Franco!" You swat his arm, but you're fighting a smile.
"What? I'm just saying, for someone who used to avoid me like I had the plague, you sure changed your tune."
"Yeah, well," you stir your coffee, trying to maintain your composure, "turns out you're not as annoying as I thought."
"High praise," he chuckles. "Remember when you wouldn't even look at me in driver briefings?"
"Remember when you replaced my best friend and then tried to steal my seat?"
"I didn't try to steal your seat!" he protests. "That was all media speculation."
Before you can respond, Max drops into the seat across from you, already looking amused at finding you two together.
"Well, well," he says, reaching for the coffee pot. "If it isn't my favorite teammate and her… what are we calling this now?"
You roll your eyes. "We're calling it none of Max's business."
"Everything is Max's business," Max says cheerfully. "Especially when said business involves my teammate getting cozy with the competition."
Franco's phone buzzes and his expression shifts slightly as he reads the message, and you catch that flicker of worry he's been trying to hide all weekend. The weight of it being potentially his last race in F1 has been hanging over both of you.
"Engineers?" you ask softly.
"Yeah," he sighs. "Last pre-race meeting of the season. Hopefully not my last ever," he adds, attempting a joke that falls flat.
You reach for his hand under the table, giving it a quick squeeze. "Hey, you've shown what you can do this year. The pace is there, the talent is there-"
"The results aren't," he cuts in, running his free hand through his hair. "DNF and crashes don't exactly scream 'keep me for next year.'"
"The car's been shit though," Max speaks up, "Everyone knows that. You've outqualified your teammate and scored points."
"Try telling that to the team principals," Franco says, attempting a smile that doesn't reach his eyes. "Anyway, better go before they add 'chronically late' to my resume." He stands, leaning down to kiss your cheek. "See you later?"
"Of course," you say softly. "Good luck in the meeting."
Once Franco leaves, Max leans forward, "Okay, spill. Everything. Now."
"There's nothing to spill."
"Nothing to spill?" Max scoffs. "Last month you were convinced he was plotting to take your seat, and now he's kissing you goodbye at breakfast? That's not nothing."
"You don't need to know everything about my life, Max," you try to busy yourself with your coffee, that's pretty much cold by now.
"I'm the older brother you never wanted but got stuck with anyway, so I do need to know about these things."
You sigh, knowing he won't let this go. "Fine. After Qatar, things changed. We… spent time together."
"Spent time together?" Max wiggles his eyebrows suggestively.
"Not like that!" you protest, then lower your voice. "Well, not just like that. We talked a lot. About everything again - the rumors, the misunderstandings, why I was so angry about Logan, and… I don't know. It's different now. Good different. When I'm with him, everything just feels…" you trail off, searching for the right words.
"Right?" Max supplies, his teasing tone softening.
"Yeah," you admit. "Which makes this whole situation even harder. If he doesn't get a seat…"
"Then you'll figure it out," Max says, "But let's not write him off yet. Season's not over until the checkered flag."
You nod, but can't help glancing at the door Franco left through. "You know what's ironic?" you say, turning back to Max. "A few months ago, I was worried about him taking my seat. Now I'd give anything for him to have one, anywhere on the grid."
Max smiles knowingly. "Amazing what a few kisses can do."
"It's not just that," you protest. "He deserves to be here. He's so talented-"
"And you're completely smitten," Max interrupts, grinning.
"Shut up," You throw a napkin at him. "I'm getting a new teammate next year," you declare.
"No you're not," Max laughs. "You love me." He pauses, suddenly looking both nervous and excited. "Actually… want to know a secret?"
Something in his tone makes you lean forward. "Always."
"Kelly's pregnant," he says, a huge grin spreading across his face. "We just found out last month"
You practically leap across the table to hug him, nearly knocking over both your coffees in the process. "Oh my god! Max! I'm going to be an auntie!"
He laughs, hugging you back. "Actually…" he pulls back slightly to look at you, "What do you think about being a godmother?"
Your eyes widen. "Are you serious?"
"Of course," he grins. "Who else would I trust to teach my kid how to properly terrorize the paddock?"
You feel tears welling up in your eyes. "I'm going to spoil them so much," you warn, hugging him again. "Like, an absolutely ridiculous amount."
"I know," he laughs. "That's kind of counting on it."
"Does anyone else know?"
"Just family for now," he says. "And you, obviously. Because you are family."
You're definitely crying now. "I hate you for making me cry before a race weekend."
"Sure you do," he grins. "Just like you hate Franco, right?"
You wipe your eyes, deciding to ignore his comment. "God, I can't believe you're going to be a dad!"
"Me neither," he admits, and there's something soft and vulnerable in his expression that makes your heart squeeze. "It's scary but… in a good way, you know?"
"You're going to be amazing," you tell him seriously. "The best dad ever."
His smile turns mischievous. "Just wait until Franco gets you pregnant-"
"And that's my cue to leave," you gather your things. "Congratulations again, future dad. I love you, even when you're the worst."
His laughter follows you out of the room. "Love you too, future godmother!"
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liked by maxverstappen1, francolapinto and 2,099,437 others
yourinstagram ABU DHABI WINNER! 🏆✨ still feels surreal to type those words. to win the last race of the season, after everything… no words can describe this feeling. thank you to every single person who never stopped believing in me, even when things got tough. to my incredible team - this one's for you. we did it! 🧡
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username1 SHE FUCKING DID IT
username2 first win of the season in the last race - poetic justice
username3 the way everyone doubted her at the start of the season and now look at her QUEEN BEHAVIOR
logansargeant YESSSS! That move was legendary! So proud of you!
username4 this feels so RIGHT
francolapinto Mi campeona 🖤 That last lap move was 🔥
↳ username1 IM CRYING OMFG
↳ username2 THEY'RE SO TOGETHER I DON'T MAKE THE RULES
username5 brb i'll be crying while i watch that video of her hugging franco
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You're still riding the high of your Abu Dhabi win as you unlock your apartment door. Your first win of the season, in the last race - it feels poetic, somehow. Like a final "fuck you" to everyone who doubted you, who questioned your seat, who spent the entire season speculating about your future.
The trophy sits in your bag, along with the champagne bottle Charles insisted you keep. Franco follows you in, still wearing that soft smile he's had since he watched you cross the finish line.
He's staying at your apartment since he doesn't have a place in Monaco and the now traditional drivers dinner is happening, after all you time together, inviting him over felt...natural.
The past few days have been a whirlwind - the podium, the celebrations, the multiple kisses stolen in your motorhome between media duties. The flight to Monaco where you both pretended to sleep but kept "accidentally" touching hands. It should feel fast, rushed, but somehow it just feels right.
"Still can't believe you pulled that move on the last lap," Franco says, dropping his bags by the door. "Even Max was impressed, I think you broke his brain a little."
"Speaking of broken, try not to destroy anything while you're here," you tease. "Some of us actually live in Monaco full-time."
Franco turns to you with mock offense. "When have I ever broken anything?"
"Do you want the list chronologically or alphabetically?" you raise an eyebrow. "Because I distinctly remember a certain incident with Lewis' scooter…"
"That was a manufacturing defect and you know it," he protests, moving closer.
"Sure it was," you laugh. "Just like the tablet in Singapore was a 'technical malfunction'?"
He's close enough now that you can smell his cologne, the same one that's been driving you crazy since Qatar. "You're never going to let that go, are you?"
"Never," you confirm, but your voice comes out softer than intended because he's looking at you the way he has been since that first kiss in his room - like you're something precious.
"Guest room's down the hall," you say quickly, trying to maintain some semblance of control. "Bathroom's across from it, you know the drill."
Franco raises an eyebrow, that mischievous glint in his eyes that you're starting to know too well. "You're really going to make me take the guest room? After all our bonding?"
"Bonding?" you scoff. "Is that what we're calling it?"
"Well, what would you call making out in your motorhome? And the plane bathroom? And-"
You cut him off by pressing your hand to his mouth. "Those were… moments of weakness."
He kisses your palm before moving your hand, and the simple gesture shouldn't make your heart race like it does. "Lots of moments."
"I was emotionally vulnerable," you argue weakly.
"Uh-huh," he steps closer, backing you against the wall. "And now?Are you emotionally vulnerable now?" His hands find your waist, and you try to ignore how right they feel there.
"I'm…" you start, but then he's kissing you, slow and deep, and you forget what you were going to say.
When he pulls back, you're both breathing heavily. "We should get ready for dinner," you manage.
"We should," he agrees, but kisses you again.
"Franco," you mumble against his lips. "We're already late."
"Five more minutes," he murmurs, trailing kisses down your neck.
It ends up being fifteen minutes before you finally push him away, your lips swollen and hair slightly messed up.
"Guest room," you point firmly. "Get changed."
He grins, stealing one last quick kiss before grabbing his bag. "Yes, boss."
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yourinstagram has added to their close friends story
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You arrive at Lewis' Monaco penthouse a fashionably acceptable ten minutes late, Franco's hand resting casually on your lower back as the elevator opens to the top floor. The space is already filled with the familiar chatter of your fellow drivers, the city lights twinkling through the floor-to-ceiling windows.
"Look who finally made it," Charles calls out, a knowing smirk playing on his lips. "Got lost on the way from your apartment? It's only three blocks…"
"Traffic," you say smoothly, ignoring Franco's poorly concealed laugh beside you.
"Must have been terrible," Alex joins in, eyes twinkling. "Considering you live literally around the corner."
Lewis appears, saving you from having to respond. He hugs you warmly before turning to Franco with a grin. "No scooters allowed inside this time, mate."
"That was one time!" Franco protests as everyone laughs. "And it was definitely faulty manufacturing."
The evening flows easily, conversation and wine flowing freely as everyone celebrates the end of another season. You find yourself constantly aware of Franco's presence - the way he automatically hands you your favorite wine, how his hand finds yours under the table, the soft looks he gives you when he thinks no one's watching.
(They're all watching. These are racing drivers - subtlety isn't their strong suit.)
"Get together, everyone!" you call out later, holding up your phone. "I want a picture."
There's the usual chaos of twenty-odd drivers trying to arrange themselves, plenty of shoving and laughing as everyone finds their spot. Franco ends up behind you, his chest pressed against your back, hands resting lightly on your waist.
"Alright, someone else take it," Lando announces. "YN's too busy making heart eyes at Franco to frame it properly."
"I am not-"
"You kind of are," Pierre interrupts with a grin.
"Just like in Abu Dhabi," Oscar adds. "And the flight home. And baggage claim. And-"
"I hate all of you."
The night continues with more conversation, more drinks, and constant teasing from your friends. Even Charles joins in, muttering something about "finally dealing with all that sexual tension in the briefings."
By the time you leave, you're both pleasantly tipsy, walking back to your apartment with slightly unsteady steps. The moment your door closes behind you, the atmosphere shifts.
"So," he says finally, stepping closer. "About that guest room…"
"What about it?" you ask, but you're already moving toward him.
"I'm thinking," he cups your face with one hand, "that it would be a shame to use it."
"Would it?"
"Mhmm," he's close enough now that you can feel his breath on your lips. "Especially when the winner deserves proper celebrations."
"Or maybe you're just being a horndog," you tease, even as your hands find their way to his chest.
"Maybe," he concedes. "Or maybe I just can't stop thinking about kissing you."
Your breath catches. "You've already kissed me plenty today."
"Not enough," he murmurs, then proves his point by capturing your lips with his.
The kiss is different from all the others. Those were stolen moments, quick and heated. This is slower, deeper, like he's trying to memorize every second.
"Don't make me take the guest room," he murmurs against your lips.
You pretend to think about it, even as your hands slip under his shirt. "Well, since you asked so nicely…"
"I can be very nice," he grins, then kisses you again, backing you toward your bedroom.
"Prove it," you challenge.
The guest room remains empty that night. And many nights after.
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yourinstagram i love my little dysfunctional family !! yes i'm the one behind the camera
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username1 THIS IS LEGENDARY
username3 FRANCO'S FACE ??? DEVASTATED BC HIS GIRL IS NOT NEXT TO HIM
lewishamilton Always family ❤️
oscarpiastri Never sitting between you and your lover boy again..
↳ username1 HUH??
↳ username2 oscar spill the deets PLEASE
↳ logansargeant to the gc NOW
↳ username3 LET ME INNNNN
↳ username4 im crying
↳ yourinstagram i hate you both
francolapinto ❤️
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yn's biggest fans groupchat
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You're curled up on your couch, watching the lights of Monaco twinkle through your window as snow falls softly outside. Franco's just finished unpacking his bags, having arrived from Argentina an hour ago. The past weeks without him felt strangely empty, even though you'd been surrounded by family for Christmas.
"Mama keeps asking about the foods I mentioned you cook," Franco says, settling beside you with a grin. "She's convinced I'm making it up."
"Did you tell her it's mostly pasta and those empanadas you taught me to make?"
"Si, but she says my standards have dropped since moving to Europe," he laughs, stealing some of your blanket. "How was your family?"
"Good. Dad's still buzzing about Abu Dhabi. He's watched the replay about fifty times, especially that last lap battle with Max," you grin, throwing your legs over his lap. "How was home?"
"Hot," he sighs contentedly. "Really hot. Nothing like a proper Argentinian summer."
"Meanwhile I was freezing in London," you poke his side. "Speaking of which… don't you have some news to share?"
He raises an eyebrow. "How did you-"
"Carlos texted me. He's terrible at keeping secrets."
Franco runs a hand through his hair, a nervous gesture you've come to recognize. "I signed with Williams. As their reserve driver for next season, there's talk about 2026, but nothing concrete yet."
"Franco!" you exclaim, throwing your arms around him. "That's amazing!"
He hugs you back, letting out a relieved laugh. "You think so?"
"Of course I do!" you pull back to look at him. "Williams is doing great things, and with Carlos and Alex there…" you trail off, seeing something in his expression. "What aren't you telling me?"
"Nothing bad," he assures quickly. "Just… I'll be based in England a lot. For simulator work and development."
"Oh," you say quietly, understanding dawning. You'd gotten used to having him here, in your space, in the paddock, in your life.
"Hey," he tilts your chin up. "It's not that far. And I'll still be at all the races. Plus," his lips quirk up, "I hear Nice has a pretty good airport."
You can't help but smile. "True. And I suppose I could be convinced to visit Grove occasionally."
"Only occasionally?" he teases.
"Well, I am very busy and important," you say loftily, making him laugh.
His eyes drop to your lips. "I'm sure you can save some time for me," he murmurs before closing the distance between you.
The kiss is soft and familiar, like coming home after a long trip. When you pull back, he's wearing that small smile that always makes your stomach flip.
You settle back against him, comfortable silence falling between you. "Talk to me about next season," he says eventually. "What's going on in that head of yours?"
"Honestly? I'm nervous," you admit. "Abu Dhabi was amazing, but what if it was just luck? What if I can't do it again?"
"The same way Suzuka was luck? And Singapore? And that insane qualifying in Baku?" Franco shifts to look at you properly, "You've been fast all season. Abu Dhabi just proved what everyone already knew."
"Smooth," you laugh, then remember something. "Oh! Speaking of next year - what are you doing for New Year's Eve?"
"Nothing yet. Why?"
"Logan's throwing a party in Florida for his birthday. Want to come?"
Franco hesitates. "Won't that be…"
"What? Weird because you stole his seat?" you tease, making him groan.
"I thought we cleared that up months ago," he protests.
"We did, I just like messing with you," you grin. "Come on, it'll be fun. There'll be cake."
“You know my weakness,” he sighs dramatically. “Does this mean I get to kiss you at midnight?”
“Bold of you to assume you’ll be my midnight kiss,” you tease, even as you lean into him.
“No? Planning on kissing someone else?” he raises an eyebrow, hands settling on your waist.
“Maybe. Logan might have a hot friend…”
"Terrible," he murmurs against your lips. "You're terrible."
"You like it," you whisper back, just before he kisses you again.
When you finally break apart, he's already reaching for the remote. "Want to watch Qatar?"
You groan, but you're smiling. "I hate you."
"No you don't," he says confidently, pulling up the race highlights.
And as he starts his terrible commentary, making you laugh despite yourself, you think about how easy this is - whatever this is between you. No labels, no pressure, just… this.
Outside, Monaco continues to sparkle under the falling snow, but in here, with Franco's warmth beside you and his voice in your ear pointing out "that brilliant move you did in turn 4" for the hundredth time, you think maybe some things don't need defining to be perfect.
Plus, you already know who your midnight kiss is going to be. Not that you'll tell him that - his ego's big enough as it is.
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liked by username1, username2 and 12,870 others
f1gossip Spotted: F1's power couple enjoying a day out in Monaco! Franco Colapinto and YN were seen strolling around today, looking very cozy! The pair, who have been subject to dating rumors seemed to have no interest in hiding their relationship anymore.
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username1 THE FUUUUUCK
username2 i don't like this..
username3 FRANCO GET AWAYYYY she's going to distract him
username4 why is this lowkey powerful
username5 THIS PLOT TWIST OMFG
username6 i thought they hated each other ??
username7 oh how the tables have turned
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Music pulses from Logan's Miami beach house as you and Franco make your way up the palm-lined driveway. The December air is surprisingly warm, fairy lights twinkling in every tree and reflecting off the pool visible through the floor-to-ceiling windows. Your hand is loosely intertwined with Franco's, something that still gives you butterflies even after weeks of... whatever this is between you.
"Birthday boy!" you call out as Logan spots you from the entrance, where he's greeting guests in a ridiculous party hat and an even more ridiculous Hawaiian shirt.
"If it isn't my best friend and the guy who stole my seat," Logan grins, pulling you into a tight hug before turning to Franco with an exaggerated suspicious look that quickly breaks into a genuine smile. "Good to see you, man."
"Happy birthday," Franco offers with a grin, accepting Logan's enthusiastic handshake-turned-hug. "Nice shirt."
"Right? YN said it was terrible, but what does she know about fashion?"
"Hey!" you protest, but you're laughing. "I have great taste."
Logan's eyes drift meaningfully to your joined hands. "Clearly," he smirks, making you blush and Franco chuckle. "Drinks are everywhere, food's by the pool, try not to fall in."
"That was one time," you mutter as Logan gets pulled away by more arriving guests.
Franco raises an eyebrow. "One time?"
"Don't ask. Come on, I need a drink before I tell you that story."
After getting drinks, you find yourself drifting between groups, Franco's hand a constant presence at the small of your back or linked with yours. It's nice, you think, not having to overthink every interaction, every touch. Here, away from the paddock and the cameras, you can just... be.
It's about an hour into the party when Logan finds you again, now sporting two party hats and what looks suspiciously like glitter on his cheek.
"Stinks! Just the person I wanted to see," he announces, dragging you away from where Franco is deep in conversation with Alex. "Back in five," he tells Franco with an exaggerated wink that makes you roll your eyes.
"Subtle," you comment as Logan leads you to the makeshift bar.
"Please, subtle went out the window when you two showed up holding hands like teenagers at prom," he snorts, mixing drinks with practiced ease. "Speaking of which..."
"Don't start," you warn, but you're fighting a smile.
"Me? Start something? Never," he puts a hand to his chest in mock offense. "I just find it interesting that the same person who spent three hours ranting to me about 'that arrogant Argentine who stole your seat' is now making heart eyes at him across my party."
"You're impossible."
"And you're happy," he says softly, his teasing tone giving way to something more sincere. "Like, really happy. I haven't seen you like this in… well, ever."
You look down at your drink, feeling your cheeks warm. "Yeah, well…"
"Hey," Logan nudges your shoulder. "It's a good thing. You deserve this, YN. Someone who gets you, who understands the pressure and the crazy schedule and still looks at you like you hung the moon."
"He doesn't-"
"He absolutely does. Trust me, I've been watching him watch you all night. It's disgustingly cute."
"I'm kind of scared, Logan," you look down at your hands nervously, "Six months ago, I hated him. And now I can't picture myself apart from him. It's all happening really fast and I'm not quite sure when everything shifted, but I feel like there's no going back now. And that's terrifies me."
"Stinks," Logan says gently, "you didn't hate him. You were hurt because of how everything went down with the seat, and you projected that onto him. I get being scared. This sport… it complicates things. But I've seen how he looks at you and how you look at him. It's okay to have feelings for him."
"How do you always know what to say?" you look up at him.
"Because I'm your best friend," he squeezes your shoulder. "Now go get your man. And please kiss him at midnight so I can win the bet with Alex."
"You bet on us?!"
"The whole grid did. I have fifty bucks riding on tonight!"
Later, as midnight approaches, you find yourself on the beach with Franco, fairy lights and stars twinkling above. Your conversation with Logan keeps playing in your mind, making you fidgety.
"You okay?" Franco asks softly, touching your arm.
"FIVE MINUTES!" someone shouts from the house.
"I have feelings for you," you blurt out. "Like, real feelings. And I know it's fast and complicated and I was horrible to you at first because I was hurt about the seat thing but then you were so nice and understanding and you brought me coffee after bad practice sessions and you defended me to the press and you make me laugh even when I'm trying to be mad and your accent gets thicker when you're tired which is unfairly adorable and-"
"THREE MINUTES!"
"-and sometimes I catch you looking at me in debriefs and it makes me forget what I'm saying and Oscar keeps making these knowing faces at us and I pretend to be annoyed but actually I kind of like it and-"
"SIXTY SECONDS!"
"-and I know this could complicate everything but I can't stop thinking about you and the way you smile when you see me in the morning and how you remember how I like my coffee and-"
"TEN! NINE! EIGHT!"
"-and maybe this is crazy but I really really like you and I know we should probably talk about what this means for next season but-"
"FOUR! THREE!"
"-and I just needed you to know-"
"TWO! ONE!"
Franco cuts off your rambling with a kiss, one hand cupping your face while the other pulls you closer. You melt into him as fireworks explode overhead, your heart racing for reasons that have nothing to do with the celebration around you.
When he pulls back, he's wearing that soft smile that always makes your stomach flip. "You're so cute when you rant."
"I don't rant," you protest weakly.
"Mi amor, you just spent ten minutes listing all the things you like about me, including my accent."
"Shut up."
He laughs, pressing his forehead to yours. "I want to be with you, YN. Officially, properly, no more undefined territory. I want everyone to know that you're mine and I'm yours. I want morning coffees and post-race celebrations and quiet moments like this. I want all of it, with you."
"Yeah?" you whisper, hardly daring to believe it.
"Yeah," he confirms, brushing his thumb across your cheek. "I'm crazy about you, in case my terrible attempts at flirting haven't made that obvious."
"Your flirting isn't terrible."
He kisses you again, laughing against your lips. "So… is that a yes?"
You pretend to think about it. "I don't know, Logan's friend is looking pretty good tonight…"
"Terrible," he murmurs, pulling you impossibly closer. "You're terrible."
"You like it," you smile, wrapping your arms around his neck.
"I like everything about you."
Your heart skips. "Everything?"
"Everything," he confirms. "Even your terrible taste in coffee."
You laugh, bright and happy, before pulling him down for another kiss. Around you, the party continues, music and waves and distant fireworks creating a perfect backdrop to this moment. When you finally break apart, you're both breathless and smiling.
"Happy New Year," you murmur.
"The happiest," he agrees, and as he leans in again, you think that maybe some feelings are worth being scared of, especially when they lead to moments like this.
Plus, you just won Logan a bet. Not that you'll tell him that.
2K notes · View notes
fairyysoup · 7 months ago
Text
easy living
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pairing: eric (a quiet place: day one) x fem!reader
summary: You ran into Eric on accident. Now you're facing the end of the world together. How do you get to know someone when you can't make a sound?
tags: smut, oral (f receiving), dry humping, piv sex, silent fucking, angst, hurt/comfort, survival, discussions of trauma, slight suicidal ideation by reader, words of affirmation as a love language, stay silent or die (obviously), strangers to lovers, apocalyptic, the cheesiest ending bc it's me writing, billie holiday lyrics bc it's also me writing
a/n: here it is, the silent fucking fic i promised y'all a year ago when this movie was announced. it was supposed to be like 1-2k words of plain smut but then I got too into the theory of what one does when you can't show affection through words and I genuinely discovered a tidbit of trauma I didn't know I had while writing it so I will be talking to a therapist about it, and also I'm literally out here baring my soul lol.
i also want to thank @bigtiddythanos @raraeavesmoriendi and @maximoffwxnda for supporting me throughout this writing process <3 this fic literally would not have been finished or published without y'all
ALL MY WORKS ARE 18+ MINORS DNI
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The rain has ended. Morose, you stare up at the ceiling, wondering when you’ll get something close to free reign with your voice again. 
Of course the world had to end while you were at fucking Whole Foods.
You’ll miss certain things. Things you always took for granted, that you never even considered made a lot of noise until now. Typing on the computer. Making stir fry. Microwaving a burrito at 3am. Lighting a match, washing your face. Taking a shower.
And other things, too, that are more obvious, like singing while making cookies. Slurping the bottom of a milkshake. You’ll never be able to have a pet bird. You’ll never be able to see another concert again, and damn it if you didn’t really want those Glastonbury tickets a month ago. But it all just seems trivial, now. You don’t see why you shouldn’t just lay here on the couch forever. 
On the other side of the coffee table there’s a gentle shuffling. Eric rouses as quietly as he can; at the very least, your apartment creates a hospitable enough environment that he isn’t startled awake. It’s so silent in the apartment that you can hear the slight shift in his intake of breath, the rustle of the pillow as he turns his head to look at you. 
You want to look at him, but you fear that you’ll end up wanting to talk. So, you say nothing. You do nothing. You stare at the white paint on the ceiling and you wonder whether it would be better to get on one of the boats headed out into the water, or to move inland, away from people, away from sound. There has to be somewhere far enough away from the city that the… creatures won’t go, right?
Eric waves his hand in your periphery, so that you have no choice but to acknowledge that you know he’s awake. You have no choice but to turn your head and look into the depths of his eyes, and feel all the pain of the last 48 hours return to you. You’d been able to talk last night, just enough, in time with the rain and the thunder– enough to learn that he has family across the world. 
You can’t imagine knowing that somewhere, across an ocean and half a world away, your parents may or may not be dead. No way to contact them, no way to know what’s become of them. You can’t even begin to fathom the fear that he’s feeling, as much as you’re despairing. 
Eric’s big eyes tell you everything. Sadness and fear, and trying to grasp at the smallest hint of normalcy he can get. He blinks at you, and mouths, You okay?
No, you’re definitely not okay. Things are not okay. Things are broken and can’t be fixed. Things will never be the same again. He knows that, as much as you know that. But you nod anyway, even though you feel your heart beat a little bit slower than usual, like it wants to just go ahead and give up already. Tears prick at your eyes, and you have to close them before you let on that you’re lying.
Eric knows you’re lying, of course. How could anyone be okay, in this kind of situation? But he waits until you open your eyes, and then he mouths, Coffee?
You let out a small sigh of relief, and a smile that’s indescribably warm crosses your face. Even though he can’t make a sound, he knows exactly what to say.
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You don’t have a coffee maker that doesn’t also make a ton of noise. But through some kind of witchcraft, Eric quietly empties two k-cups into a glass measuring cup and boils a soup pot full of water on the stove, and suddenly you have hot coffee in front of you. 
On a notepad left on the counter, you write, Wish I had some tea for you. 
Eric’s lips turn up at the edges, and he takes the pen from you. You’re able to doctor your coffee for about one second before he slides the notepad back to you.
Bloody American.
Your ensuing huff of a laugh is enough to make him turn pink around the ears, and he turns to place the dirty measuring cup into the sink. He reaches for the faucet, but then thinks better of it. You’ll have to figure out how to wash the dishes later.
You both drink your coffee in silence on the couch. You never considered yourself uncomfortable with silence; you’ve lived alone, you’ve gone for weeks without uttering a word before. But it’s so difficult to be sitting next to someone– someone you feel you could really get to like– and not be able to say a word. To make a sound, laugh or cry or snort or grunt. 
You’ll never be able to know what Eric’s laugh sounds like, or listen to his favorite song with him, or watch some stupid rerun of Friends with him while ignoring your responsibilities. He’s right there next to you, he’s risked his life to save you once already, and yet he’s so far away. You’ll never get to know him in all the ways you want to. Will you ever really know him at all?
He’d created a diversion when one of the fucking things had you trapped in a corner, between a dumpster and a brick wall. He chucked a rock at a car and set off an alarm, and then ran with you down an alleyway, his arm wrapped tight around your waist. Eric looked so sad, following you like a lost puppy. He was fucking drenched, too, so you know he’d probably been through one hell of a morning. And then the rain started, and the creatures were confused and… well, you weren’t just gonna leave him, scared and alone.
You, too, were scared and alone.
Eric’s hand appears to brush away a tear that had begun to fall down your cheek, betraying your internal monologue. You look to him with puffy eyes, and he pulls his hand away, suddenly unsure of whether you’re okay with such an intimate gesture. 
Your coffee cup meets the table with a quiet tap. You’re slow to move, but you scoot towards him, his arm still outstretched towards you, his eyes wide. Eric has the prettiest eyes in the world, you think. You want to tell him so.
But you’re a little too choked up to form words, anyways. Your forehead meets Eric’s shoulder, and his arm comes around you before you can huff the first silent sob that brims up. He coos softly into your hair, so softly that you can barely hear it, but it conveys enough. It does enough. 
The world is fucked. Your life is fucked. You have tunnel vision and you can only see things getting worse from here on; the only good thing you know anymore is holding you and caressing your head so gently that it pushes your tears out for you. 
You’ll never get to see a movie in a theater, and smell the stale popcorn again. You’ll never drive down the highway with the wind in your hair. You’ll never ride a roller coaster or sing karaoke. You’ll never go to a club and have a drunken heart to heart with a stranger in a bathroom.
“Do you think it’s worth it?” You whisper, so faintly that it’s barely above a breath, your lips pressed to the shell of his ear. “To try to exist in a world where you have to pretend like you don’t exist?”
Eric pauses, holding you to him. You can see the wheels turning in his head, while he tries to figure out what to say. Then he turns his face to put his lips against your ear, the same way you’d done to him. 
“I think it’s worth it to try to survive.” His breath tickles your skin when he whispers, “So survive with me, yeah?”
You nod solemnly, your tears threatening to rise up again. “I can’t stand not talking to you.” It’s so hard to keep your voice from cracking, from rising above the merest hint of a whisper, directly to him and no one or nothing else. 
Eric takes it in stride. “You are talking to me.” He pulls back and bats his eyelashes, and you think, he oughta fucking know what that does to me. 
“Not like this,” you breathe to him, because that’s really what it is– it’s a breath. A sigh. A gust of air and nothing else, barely anything that registers on your vocal chords. Your hand on the back of his neck, pulling him close to you. His hand, tightening on the middle of your back, holding you there. “I want to talk– I want to get to know you.” 
“Well, this isn’t so bad, is it?” Eric turns his head. His forehead nudges yours at the temple, and you swear you see a flash of a smile on his face. “What do you want to know?” 
His forefinger traces up and down, up and down, a gentle pattern that keeps you grounded. You bite your lip, trying to keep from letting the sounds come out too loud. You say the first thing that comes to mind. “What’s your favorite song?”
“Easy Living. Billie Holiday.” 
“You’re kidding.” You’re blushing, hot in the cheeks. You’re imagining it; slow dancing in the kitchen with him while oldies plays on the radio. You didn’t think such an innocent question would send you spiraling like this, but it hurts worse to know that it will probably never happen.
“Absolutely not.” 
“Somehow… I can’t picture you listening to jazz.” 
“Picture it all you want,” he whispers. Eric swallows, and continues, “My granddad used to have these records, and we used to play them on Christmas. But when– when he died, the records went missing. I couldn’t find the song until a couple years ago,” he explains, and his voice cracks just slightly into a murmur. 
You both freeze. You wait for the sound of creatures coming down the hallway, busting down the walls… nothing happens. You let out a breath, and you pull his face closer to yours. His eyes flick over your face, and you put your lips against his ear. 
“You have to be so quiet. Can you do that for me?” Eric nods in your hands. “I wish we could do anything but this. I wish that we could have met in better circumstances. I wish… I wish I had known you before all of this. I think we would have had a lot of fun. But if this is the only way I can get to know you, and hear your voice now, I’ll take it.” You’re nodding as well now, like you’re trying to convince yourself of it. “I’m telling you this because I don’t know how long we have. Together, I mean. And I don’t want to waste it passing notes. Okay?” 
“Okay.” He sounds clipped. His hand fidgets on your back, and you pull away to find him misty-eyed, his brows turned up. He fishes for words that don’t come, and then he nods. “Okay.” 
Neither of you move. The atmosphere around you feels heavy, like it’s pressing in on all sides. Eric’s hand slides up your back and to your face, and you remember that you’re still holding his. You’re near sitting in his lap with how close you’ve become, and the realization of that feels like a punch to the gut.
You think you should pull away. You don’t. 
Eric’s thumb traces a gentle arc across your bottom lip. It’s so featherlight it’s barely there– his eyes are honed in on your mouth, clearly lost in thought. You’d let him stay there as long as he wants, but you want every minute you can get. “Eric–”
He closes the gap and kisses you. The way you’d said his name– or not said it, rather, you sort of mouthed it against his thumb– had done the job you wanted it to. It feels like this was the obvious conclusion to the system you’d worked out, the close proximity and your shared fears. He’s scared, he said as much last night. You’re scared, you said so just now. 
Nowhere to go, nothing else to do except be right here, living. Alive, together. Kissing Eric, and him pulling you close by the waist, so that you do swing your leg and seat yourself in his lap. And as much as you love talking, and it breaks your heart that you can’t jabber at him, there are some things you just can’t put into words. Like the way that his hand on the back of your neck lights you up inside, or that you can’t think of anything other than all the areas where his skin is touching yours, and how you suddenly wish there was way more of them.
It’s stupid how much you like him already, really. You can feel your nonexistent friends clucking their tongues and shaking their heads, saying, “One day? That’s all it takes? You find some guy at the end of the world and you fall in love in 24 hours?” And they’d be right– maybe it’s not love. Not yet, anyways. But you could see it easily becoming that. And that fact scares you even more.
Your hands find Eric’s chest and the frantic beating of his heart tells you nearly the same thing. You break the kiss, trying to quietly catch your breath without gasping like you’re half-drowning. It’s harder than you expected. 
“Been wanting to do that all morning,” Eric whispers. And just like that you’re falling again, faster this time, like he’s just melted your wings right off and sent you plummeting.
You struggle to keep from gasping aloud when he kisses your jaw, just beneath your ear. It’s the lightest touch but you swear it burns, sears your skin. 
Your hands find the back of the couch, twitchy fingers digging in to keep you steady. Your mouth finds his again, his tongue tasting of coffee, and Eric kisses you a bit harder now, a bit sloppier. 
Breaking away, you open your eyes to find his wide, starstruck, his mouth hanging open like he’s been shocked beyond belief. You didn’t honestly intend for this to happen– you wanted to talk. But somehow this seems better, more appropriate. 
How do you get your feelings across when talking isn’t really an option? When innocent attraction becomes… whatever this is? 
You press a single finger to his plush lips, signaling exactly what you mean without a word. Quiet. 
Eric purses his lips, kisses your finger without breaking eye contact. His pupils are blown out so far that the barest hint of golden brown surrounds them, glinting in the sunlight from the window. 
You lean forward, until your mouth touches his ear. “Your eyes are so fucking pretty, Eric,” you whisper to him, and your teeth latch onto his earlobe to tug gently. You can’t help it– you grind your hips down into his lap, without even thinking of doing it. “You’re so pretty.”
Eric whimpers. It’s a soft sound, hollow in the back of his throat, but it’s still too loud for the world that you’re in. You clamp your hand down over his mouth, and his breath comes out sharp and hot over your knuckles as he tries to regain composure.
“Do you want me to stop?” You ask him, whispering gently in his ear. Against you, he shakes his head no. “Want me to keep going?” Eric nods his head yes. 
He’s shaking under you, his fingertips digging into your lower back like he can’t hold onto you hard enough. At the thought, your pulse pounds, blood positively humming through your veins. 
You nuzzle his cheek, and give him the sweetest kiss you can while your hand is still clamped over his mouth insistently. “You have to be. Fucking. Silent. Do you understand?” He nods. “We can’t make a sound. Okay?” 
Eric nods again, and keeps nodding until you let him go. If the rain was still pouring like earlier, you could tell him how much you want him, too. How you don’t want to be mean, you just don’t want to get hurt. This is a bad idea, all things considered. But Eric slides his hand down and cups your ass to lift you up a bit, and the words bad and idea suddenly fucking vanish from your vocabulary.
You stand long enough to kick off your sweats, your day old panties going down with them. You hadn’t dressed to be sexy yesterday, you dressed to get groceries. You don’t necessarily want Eric to see your faded cotton underwear with the stretched out elastic and multiple frayed holes. You don’t think it would add to your sex appeal right now. 
He doesn’t notice the lack of a strip tease– he’s already taking you by the hips, not even waiting for you to shuck your t-shirt. He pulls until you’re stood in front of him, and then hooks your leg over his shoulder. 
So. Eric doesn’t need to be asked to go down on you, he just does. The gentleman. His hands are firm on your ass as he nuzzles into the patch of hair between your legs, and the precarious balancing act makes you snatch onto the back of the couch again. 
His tongue glides through the folds of your pussy slowly, methodically. You aren’t sure if he wants to take his time, or if he’s going slow so that he doesn’t make too much noise when doing it, but he latches onto your clit and sucks agonizingly softly, like he knows he should do it harder but won’t risk making you moan. 
It’s so gentle, and it builds. Pretty soon, you’re having a tough time keeping your whimpers in, even when he’s basically just teasing you, flicking his tongue over your clit with even the barest pressure. Your head has fallen back on your shoulders, your hand now clasped over your own mouth to stifle your sighs. 
Then, Eric’s hand glides up to splay across your lower back, and he sucks long and hard at your clit, and your hand squeezes murderously at the back of the couch while you ride out your orgasm on his tongue. 
Knees buckling, you collapse into Eric’s lap. He has a doe-eyed look on his face that’s way too innocent after what he just did to you. With panting breath and shaking hands, you cup his rosy cheeks in your palms, shaking your head in disbelief. 
Eric’s brows tilt in worry, like he did something wrong. He opens his mouth, but you put your fingers against his lips to silence him, and lean forward to breathe, “You’re too sweet for me, Eric.” 
He traces his fingers lightly up your spine, and turns his head. “Maybe one day I won’t have to be sweet. Maybe then I can really fuck you.” 
The sound of his whispering voice in your ear makes you shiver, your lust reaching a boiling point. The idea of him really fucking you– that this isn’t even him as normal, that he’s having to hold so much back– makes you burn hot all at once. That this isn’t something he’s planning on doing once. That there’s a ‘one day’ that he sees in the future with you in it. 
With a nod, your breath catches in your throat. You find your way to his mouth again, kissing him desperately. You can taste yourself lingering on his lips, and your hips rock forward against his again. 
Eric inhales sharply, stifling his own moan. You guess you have to take it just as slowly as he did, ease him into it. You work your hand beneath his unbuttoned fly and palm him, keeping your touch gentle against his hot skin. He shakes, his hands laid out against your spine, his eyes sparkling when he looks up at you. 
You push your forehead against his as you sink onto his cock, letting yourself adjust to his size. His breath stutters as he tries to keep quiet, small puffs of air spilling out and meeting your electrified skin. You curl your fingers into the hair at the nape of his neck, rocking your hips just barely, settling into his lap. 
This is more intimate than you can ever remember being with anyone, but right now it just feels right. Maybe it could be cathartic to fuck like a couple of animals in the face of doom, but Eric pulls your body flush against his, one strong forearm around your waist, and his nose nudges yours, and you think this is better. This is what you both need. Closeness. Sweetness. 
There isn’t a lot of movement– you can’t risk it. You and Eric seem to be in agreement on that, because as soon as you start trying to move in earnest, he just pulls you back to him, his arm around your waist and his hand petting the back of your head. 
Eric rocks his hips up into yours slowly, deeply, and it’s the depth of it and the slow sensuality that keeps you floating. Your clit catches on the patch of hair at the base of his cock each time you roll your hips with him, and you have to kiss him to keep from keening aloud. He doesn’t seem to mind it. 
You know he’s close when he tucks his face against your neck, his arm tightening around you. “Feels so fucking good,” comes his whine in your ear, and you gently shush him, your hand resting on the back of his head to keep him muffled against your shoulder. You want so badly to look at his face when he cums, but there’s that pesky issue of staying alive, and that hinges on whether or not he can keep quiet when he does. 
To his credit, he bites your shoulder and only whimpers a little bit. It’s just a squeak, but really, he could have been much louder about it, and then you would have both been in trouble. Imagine having to run for your life with your pants down. 
Ever the gentleman, he keeps you there even after he’s spent and sensitive, his hand clamped down on your thigh to prevent you from moving. His thumb finds your clit, and he lifts his head to watch you, his hooded eyes trained on your face as he brings you to the edge and over it again. He watches the way your brows tilt up, the way you struggle to keep your own eyes open, and the silent moan that threatens to break past your parted lips.
Eric claps his hand down over your mouth before it can. Your eyes fly open, your cunt clenches down around him, and he bares his teeth as you cum hard. It’s cyclical, comes in waves as he continues to stroke you through it, as he keeps his hand clamped down on your mouth to keep you quiet. 
To keep you quiet. 
Feverish and exhausted, you come down with your chest against his, Eric’s head flopped back onto the backrest of the couch. Your knees fucking hurt and you have yet to get off of him, and you sort of dread the moment when you have to. But this means your mouth is positioned right next to Eric’s ear, and you’re nothing if not a talker.
“Eric?” you whisper, and he turns his head just enough to let you know he heard you. “I’m glad that I met you when I did. Even if it’s terrible timing, I’m glad we met.”
A sweet, tired smile flits across Eric’s beautiful face. He nudges his nose against your temple. “I’m glad, too.” 
You shift off of him, and he squeezes your thigh just at the same time as he scrunches his face. He’s such a trooper about it, you kiss his cheek as you go, leaning over to grab a pair of earphones from the coffee table. 
You hand one ear bud to him, watching as confusion crosses his face. He watches you type on your phone as he tucks the bud into his ear, and you the other. 
On low volume, you listen to the soft piano and saxophone intro to an old jazz standard. Eric grins, his hand finding your cheek before he pulls you in for a kiss. 
And then, Billie Holiday’s voice plays for only you two to hear. 
Living for you is easy living, It’s easy to live when you’re in love And I’m so in love, There’s nothing in life but you.
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scorpiosbite · 2 months ago
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𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 ────୨ৎ──── INTRODUCING POUGE!READER
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POUGE!READER grew up on the cut, spent basically all her time at the chateau before it burnt down because she was neighbours with john b, her parents died when she was 13, so the pouges are her only family and big john became her legal guardian, but when big john died she and the pouges all moved in together into the maybank house turned pougelandia. she has a lot of trauma and sadness that she buries deep below. unable to deal with her heavy emotions.
POUGE!READER is an earthy girl, she loves the beach and is often wearing a bikini under her long skirts and tiny tops. she has dainty tattoos littered all over her body, whether it be song lyrics down her spine or star like symbols on her sternum or flowers on her hip. more often than not she’s done them on herself and the pouges. she works at the local tattoo place on the cut.
POUGE!READER loves art, she paints pieces for the house and is always drawing in her sketchbook. she is a ride or die kinda girl, and she’s so sweet, so easy to fall in love with. but don’t ever cross her or come after her friends or family, cause then she has no problem getting her hands dirty.
POUGE!READER loves music, specifically sade, erykah badu, ms lauren hill, the paragons, led zeppelin, frank ocean and jimi hendrix, but she gets down to all kinds of music, she is constantly blasting music in her bust down car that she inherited from her mechanic dad or at home while cooking or painting. loves going on long drives with the top of the car down.
POUGE!READER loves smoking weed and occasionally drinks at parties, but she doesn’t have the best tolerance so weed and alcohol make her super giggly and horny. often leading to the pouges taking care of her.
POUGE!READER is everyone’s parents favourite pouge due to her sweet disposition. heyward often tells her that she’s too sweet to be dragged into the pouge’s bullshit, but don’t think that her sweetness is all she is, more often than not she’s the one getting her hands dirty or talking shit to the kooks.
POUGE!READER who has never had a boyfriend because she’s waiting for the right guy, many have tried their hand time and time again, pouges and kooks alike, but she doesn’t give them the time of day.
POUGE!READER is the prettiest girl on kildare, with her pretty plump lips and big almond shaped eyes, she oozes natural sex appeal but is completely unaware of the hunger she causes, especially in a specific kook. being the youngest in the group, the pouges are extremely protective of her especially the boys who see her as their little sister, but the girls know how dirty minded she really is.
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𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ fics coming soon
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about time i wrote for rafe, let me know if you wanna be added to the tag list for these fics!! and let me know what you think of pouge!reader!!
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joelsdagger · 8 months ago
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intermission || joel miller x f!reader
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shout out to @dinandwhiskey for feeding into my delusions for this one and to @skrunkly-scrimblo for the beta <33
pairing: daddy dom!joel miller x f!reader summary: movie night with joel doesn’t go to plan, or joel fucks your mouth while you’re sleeping. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ rating: 18+ MDNI warnings: [No Outbreak], established relationship, age gap [reader is 24, joel is late 50’s] , dd/lg dynamics, daddy kink, somnophilia [no explicit consent in this fic but she’s cool with it, therefore dubcon], oral [m receiving], face fucking, deepthroating, finger sucking, praise kink, pet names [little bug, little angel, baby, the works lol], references to tummy bulge, references to unprotected p in v sex, mentions of creampies, cum eating, reader can be carried [tho in my mind joel is huuuuuge so size kink as well], Joel’s POV. word count: 2.3k a/n: happy father’s day (iykyk) :3
series masterlist | masterlist | ao3 | playlist
dividers by @saradika-graphics
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He shouldn’t. He knows he shouldn’t. 
I don’t fall asleep during movies, daddy, you had sassed him. 
Whatever you say, little bug. 
That was an hour ago and now you’re resting your pretty little head against his belly, your hand tucked beneath your head. You look so peaceful. So pretty. So soft. So – pliant. 
He really shouldn’t. 
But then your hand slips from under your head and falls to rest a hair's breadth away from his clothed cock, it jumps in his sweats. You’ve practically pavloved him to react like that with just a mere graze of your fingertips. 
“You got no idea what you do to me, sweet girl, drivin’ me fuckin’ crazy over here,” his voice a low rasp, reaching for your fingers and gently pulling them from his lap, squeezing your fingertips twice before resting them atop his thigh. 
You’re completely limp, deep in your sleep and Joel is unable to control himself.
He snatches up the remote, hastily turns down the TV, shoves his gray sweats down to the middle of his thighs and frees his semi-hard cock. He wraps a hand around the base, gives it a firm tug, and rests the tip of his length on your lips.
He stills and swallows hard. He shouldn’t do this. He can’t do this, it feels selfish to take what he’s been desperately wanting from you — for the better part of an hour — when you’re unable to respond. He should wake you. 
But then, almost as if you’ve made the decision for him; your lips part and a soft moan releases from you, mmm, daddy. His cock twitches against your lips, opaque droplets already gathering at the slit. Your lips stay parted and the glistening tip slips between your plush lips. 
“Fuck– ” He groans at the sensation, eyes rolling back into his head, hand flying up to the back of yours, cradling your skull in an attempt to anchor himself as he slowly rolls his hips up into you. He stiffens fully at the feeling of your warm, wet mouth around him. It feels fucking incredible. 
How the hell did he get here? A rare lazy sunday night with you on his lap, taking a man almost three times your age in between your lips, letting him use you in your sleep. 
He remembers first laying eyes on you. You showed up on his porch one night, not too long ago, with sparkling eyes and a shy smile on your face. He didn’t even hear what you had said to him, too distracted by the soft skin of your exposed thighs just below the hem of your pale pink dress — barely covering the plump shape of your ass — and the flow of your hair as a wave of muggy summer heat swept past. He thinks it was something about the leftover cake from your birthday. He only guessed that from the sad, fat square slice of funfetti birthday cake held up in a flimsy paper plate before him, the letters jaggedly cut down the middle of the celebratory phrase.
Joel is a strong man; at least that’s what he tells himself. He knew you were too young for him. The split letters that barely spelled out twenty-four on your birthday cake told him as much. Trouble, he’d muttered. He still mumbles that occasionally when you push his buttons, though hours later, he often finds himself burying his length deep inside of you, tears pricking your eyes while he stretches your needy cunt.
But then you glanced up at him with wide, curious eyes and flashed him a big, toothy smile — the prettiest little thing he’s seen in all his long, hard years — and he cracked; his cement walls came crumbling down. He brought you inside his home, into his too-small bed, and fucked you until you cried, until you asked him for a break only to climb on top of him minutes later, begging him to feed you his cock again.
His cock pulses on your tongue at the memory, your voice high-pitched as you cried, Daddy, please, I want it. And Joel couldn’t resist his special girl. How could he? When you softly gasped into his mouth as he pushed the blunt head of his cock past your puffy folds — nuzzling in and making a home for himself — where he belongs. Your warm, drooling cunt sucking him in to the hilt, sheathing the entirety of his hard length inside your messy little pussy. 
Joel is a strong man, but not when it comes to you. 
Please, please, I need to feel it inside me. All the way up here, daddy, you whined, one hand gliding up your belly, the other fisting the fabric of your lace-trimmed dress. He just couldn’t resist you. So he fucked you and fucked you deep, until he was in the soft pouch of your tummy and poking through from the other side, just as you had asked of him. He fucked you full of his spend, until your poor, tiny hole couldn’t take any more of his cum. 
He’d damn himself to hell before he’d refuse you. He only hopes you don’t deny him if you wake. 
His deft, roughened fingers brush the hair out of your face before settling his hand back on your head. He sits up and leans over; marveling at the stretch of your lips around him, sweat beginning to pool at the nape of his neck and the corners of his temples. 
He feels filthy. A dirty old man. He’s never taken you like this before. But it doesn’t feel wrong. He’s only missing those pretty sounds you make —
You stir and let out a soft moan around him. Sweet Jesus, there you go. Your head dips lower down his belly, nestling more of his length into your hot mouth. Atta fuckin’ girl. Let me in, baby. Open up real big for daddy. 
“Such a naughty little thing, lettin’ me fuck your throat while you’re sleepin’, just needed to be full o’me huh?” He whispers softly, and at that, you hum. Joel can’t help when he bucks up into your mouth in response, saliva pouring past your lips and onto his graying pubic hair. 
“Fuck, baby, you like gettin’ daddy all messy? Like chokin’ on daddy’s big cock?” He taunts, a grin tugging on his face. 
Once again, as if you can hear him, you hum. 
You’re so damn responsive. Or maybe you just like having his dick in your mouth.  
“Fuck, yeah, you do,” he pants, his voice strained with restraint. His free hand glides down to the swell of your ass — the softest skin he thinks he’s ever felt — and hikes up the frilly hem of those pink sleep shorts that he likes a little too much — the ones speckled with tiny red hearts — over one cheek, grabs a handful of your plush flesh, and squeezes. You moan, and Joel feels your tongue twitch, feather-like, beneath the heavy weight of his cock, then pressing up against the thick, pulsing vein on the underside of his shaft. He bites down on his lip to muffle the loud moan that sneaks past his lips, the back of his head hitting the couch behind him. 
“Goddamnit, takin’ me so damn well, even in your sleep, such a good fuckin’ girl,” he babbles, his eyes shut tight as he revels in the feeling of himself in your mouth, the action movie silently playing on the screen flashes against his eyelids, measured shaky breaths escaping him. The strong hand on your head easing you lower and lower to take more of him, your lips now grazing the drool drenched hair at his base.  
Your mouth feels like velvet around him — warm and soft and so perfect that his hips cant upwards unconsciously, the pace of his thrusts increasing. He’s losing himself in the haze of his fast-approaching release, a deep-seated tension building in his gut, teetering on the edge until—
You splutter around him and Joel’s head snaps up to peer down at you, your eyelids flutter open against the soft glow of the television.
“Shit, baby. ‘M sorry,” he rasps and quickly retracts his hand from your head. Yet, you don’t pull yourself off him, instead you curl your weak fingers into his thigh. You don’t want him to stop. 
“You want me to keep going?” He asks gruffly, he knows you can take him, you’ve done it countless times since you have met. He’s trained you well. Yet, he needs to be certain he’s not reaching your limit. 
You drag your lips off his cock, an obscene wet slurping sound fills the too still air, letting off him with a pop and maneuvering yourself to sit up on your knees. “Yes, please daddy,” your voice still thick with sleep, peering up at him with an innocence to your needy gaze; a mixture of drool and precum coating your pouty lips. 
“Christ,” he mutters, under his breath. Such a pretty fuckin’ sight. One he reckons he’ll never get tired of seeing. He can’t deny you. Not when you look at him like that. 
“Okay, baby, here,” he murmurs, his hand retakes its place on the back of your head, guiding you toward his aching cock, your lips latch onto the fat head — all angry and red — and he inhales a shuddery breath as he watches your face contort at the stretch of him in your mouth. 
Your tongue flattens underneath him and he presses himself deeper into your willing mouth, filling you up and messaging the walls of your throat with the wide head of his cock. 
His grip in your hair tightens and a low groan rumbles in his throat, “There you go, baby, hold still.”  
Fucking hell. He could keep you here forever. 
“So goddamn pretty like this, baby,” Joel grits, “Love havin’ your mouth stuffed full o’ my cock, huh?” 
You make a low muffled sound around the length of his cock.
“S’right, you do,” he answers for you.  
His free hand trails down the length of your body, instinctively gripping the meat of your ass, dull fingernails digging into your skin, just barely grazing your puckered hole. You whine around him, the vibrations from your throat has him flexing his fingers your hair in response, and with shallow, quick thrusts of his hips, he fucks himself into your mouth. 
Fresh tears begin to sprout in your eyes as you gulp hard, your throat constricting around him. Joel feels his throbbing tip choked tight at the small opening at the back of your throat. The warm walls of your throat so tight — so good for him — the muscles in his belly tighten, and the hand on your ass is quick to join the other on your head, gripping your skull. “Shit— that’s it, angel. M’comin’.” His dick pulsates on your tongue, and a loud, guttural groan spills from him as hot, thick spurts of his cum coat your throat. His hand holds you there, firmly pressing your mouth flush to his spit-smeared balls. He feels you swallow around him again, and he whines quietly. The muscles in his jaw go slack, and his head falls back onto the couch while he lazily thrusts upwards, his leaking head bruising the back of your throat as he empties the last of himself into your mouth and filling your belly, his chest heaving from exertion.
He lifts his head when he feels you pull off him; you cough softly against him, the warmth of your breath brushes against his now softening cock, and his hooded gaze meets the sight of a thin string of saliva and cum dribbling from your wet, puffy lips, tears dripping from the corner of your eyes and down your cheeks. “Oh, c’mere, little bug, lemme see.” 
Just as he taught you, you plant a small, wet kiss on each of his heavy balls. Joel sighs through his nostrils. Fuck. What did he do to deserve you? You’re too good for him. You scoot over to sit up in his lap. Joel feels the slick between your legs through your tiny shorts when you press against his soft cock. He lets out a little groan; if he hadn’t just come, he’d be getting hard at the sensation.
His hand reaches to grip your jaw, angling your face up as you present him with your open mouth, the corners of his lips twitch at the sight of the walls of your little throat; empty, swollen, and used. 
“My filthy girl, you did so good f’me,” he cooes, coaxing away your tears and swiping your glistening lips clean. He pushes the pad of his thumb — covered in slobber and cum — into your mouth and presses it onto your tongue. Your wet eyes lock with his as you enthusiastically suck his thumb clean. 
Man alive. Maybe you’ll damn him to hell.
You release his thumb and giggle, biting your lip and smiling up at him dreamily. “Thank you, daddy, I liked it,” you rasp quietly. 
“Yeah?” He breathes, both of his hands on either side of your face, thumbs stroking your wet cheeks. 
Your wide, glassy eyes meet his gaze, “I like when you do things that make you feel good, it makes me feel good,” your voice hoarse and small, fingers toying with the collar of his t-shirt.
“Well – you always make daddy feel good, little angel,” he praises, leaning forward to lay a long kiss to your forehead that elicits a breathy sigh from you, your eyelids fluttering closed. 
“You tired, baby?” He whispers, tucking your soft hair behind your ear, fingers stroking down your hair and twirling the end of the gathered strands between his fingers.   
You yawn quietly and give him a slow, small nod, a sleepy smile to your face as you sink down in his lap, your weeping cunt throbbing against him. He’ll play with your perfect little pussy in the morning. Maybe your other little hole too. 
He chuckles at that. “Alright, little bug...” he starts, tucking his soft cock back into his sweats. He scoops you up into his arms; his weak, achy knees pop, and a low grunt spills from him as he stands, “Bedtime.”
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sulkybender · 6 days ago
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One trend on ao3 that I feel uneasy about is the increased use of “author is trans” “author is disabled” “author is ace” etc tags.
On the one hand I can understand how it can feel like a reassuring sign for readers who are trans/disabled/ace etc that their lives are less likely to be misrepresented in that fic because the writer has lived experience.
But at the same time, when we’re writing fanfiction—about kids who can manipulate the force of the waves, about necromancy, about flying on dragons—I think the suggestion that you need to have lived experience to write sensitively about something is so limiting.
Like if we aren’t exercising the full force of our imaginations and empathy in fanfiction, where exactly are we doing it?
It also makes me sad because sometimes you can tell from the nervousness of the author’s note that the writer felt they had to justify their writing with their lived experience. And I don’t think you should feel ethically obligated to gesture toward personal and often painful aspects of your identity to justify writing you do in your spare time that makes you happy.
Some of the best fics I’ve read about disability have been written by authors that didn’t have experience with that exact condition and did heartfelt research and really let themselves inhabit it. And I think that’s a bravura display of empathy and the very best that fiction can offer: caring about a character enough, and caring about your readers enough, that you want to understand what it’s like.
Sometimes friends have asked me about my visual disability to better understand Zuko for their stories, and I’ve always found it really moving. It means they care so much about the fictional world that they want to get the real world right too. It means they’re learning and growing so they can make stories about disability.
It means they love the show, and it means they love me.
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