#felt like making something to express how happy i am to be creating sm again !! :D

[sunlightdrop]

🎨🌷✨

[lasquadrasfuckhouse]

hello i hope it’s ok to request this, but I can’t stop thinking about that like really pure tender-emotional sex with la squadra— I was wondering if I could request that as either hc’s ( or a fic with melone or prosciutto if you get a muse for it ) I don’t know if that’s enough to go on but aa the sappy thoughts are running around my head ; v ; ) please and thank you ( unrelated but I love your blog and hope you have a wonderful day/night 💘 )

OK FIRST OF ALL THIS POST MADE IT INTO MY DREAMS i dreamt that i was answering this and one of the points i wrote for ghiaccio was 'don't worry he can handle it he's a gamer' WHAT DOES THAT MEAN??? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN???????

BUT!!! TOTALLY OK TO REQUEST IT I AM A SUCKER FOR TENDER EMOTIONAL SEX

and thank u sm afjglfndng i hope ur day/night is wonderful too 🥺❤️❤️❤️💕 even tho i think u sent this like maybe over a week ago time isn't real fjgkfkfj I HOPE UR CURRENT AND ALL FUTURE DAYS R GOOD. here are some hcs for u!!!!!

la squadra and lovemaking ❤️

18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI

risotto ✂️

he absolutely craves intimacy. goin hard and gettin freaky is super fun obviously but to him the best, most fulfilling and satisfying sex is when he and his partner are just close as can be in every way

he wants to open up. create a space like that for him, where he knows he's as safe with you as you are with him, and you'll really see the incredibly gentle, loving, and passionate side of risotto. he knows how he presents himself outwardly, as cold and intimidating, but the thought of everyone seeing him as just that--or worse, seeing himself as just that--makes him feel empty and he hates it.

so be his safe haven where he can express just how damn loving he is, openly acknowledge that side of him and embrace it, love it wholeheartedly, and let him know that you know he keeps you safe in turn not just with his ferocity, but his softness. he'll be so full of love he'll wonder how he ever could have felt empty.

he'll want to make love face to face, looking into each other's eyes, kissing soft and deep, and just absolutely basking in how you make each other feel. he'll want to take his time to feel every single inch of you and leave nothing untouched. he could do this for hours and hours, all day really, and he's almost achingly gentle. do the same for him, feel and love his whole self, let him know that he is precious and deserves to be treated with care; his expression will go so soft (and he is more expressive like this). the way he makes his partner cum isn't just physical, it's euphoria and love felt in every way and he'll want to carry them there as many times as they want because he just wants to make them feel as loved as they make him feel

he's just quiet by nature so he still doesn't say much, he'd rather express himself in other ways and you're connecting so deeply that you hardly need words (depeche mode enjoy the silence plays tenderly in the distance) and he loves that, he loves that intimacy. but he will, as least once, maybe while you're getting him close, whisper an i love you.

you also get him smiling with his cute dimples, because of course you do. and tell him genuinely that he's cute; he doesn't hear it often, and it makes him feel loved. he'll be head over heels.

he'll hold you very close for a long time after, just being with you. he'll stroke your back and feel your heartbeat against his, there's something so beautiful and intimate about it. you make him so happy. he's really warm too, perfect for snuggling!!!!

prosciutto 🚬

his caring nature always comes out at least at some point during sex, but especially when you make love. the tricky part for him is letting himself be cared for, too. he gets a bit nervous about it in all honesty, and that's less about guarding himself and more about guarding everyone else.

help him see there's nothing to worry about. you know you're safe and loved with him always, that doesn't change when he allows himself to be cared for, and in fact brings a whole new level of emotional safety to the table when you connect like that. remind him in no uncertain way that he deserves it, too. remind him that he's human, and show that you want to feel human with him in any way he'll share with you. and of course, he wants that with you. he trusts you completely, and once it really clicks that it's a matter of trust too, it's much easier for him to settle into.

there's something so special and unique about the connection you two make when he lets his walls down in that way. he never could have imagined how amazing it is to let go with you, it's nothing he's ever felt before and he can't get enough of it.

he loves to give, he gives wholeheartedly and unabashedly, and he'll receive your love without hesitation too

the forehead touch. always the forehead touch. it's his way of connecting and showing affection. he may also nudge your noses together and close his eyes to just soak in your presence. if you initiate it, he'll melt.

he embraces imperfection with you and it feels so damn good. he'll get a bit more vocal--not necessarily louder, but breathy whines and whimpers and soft moans. he may get playful too, give sweet little laughs about how you're making him sound and kissing the tip of your nose. you get real smiles out of him with that adorable tooth gap. tell him it's adorable and kiss his cheeks, and he'll laugh again and smile wide and genuinely in that way that ur eyes close too cause ur just so happy u kno

he feels so, so fucking loved and it's so beautiful to him. he tells you as much when you're laying there afterwards and he's admiring every inch of you, every mark, blemish or scar, everything that isn't exactly even, admiring your beautiful soul. and he basks as you do the same for him. he'll thank you for sharing this little piece of humanity with him.

pesci 🎣

soft sex is his favourite. sex as a way of feeling close with the person he loves is what vibes with him the most, as an act of emotion and of loving and being loved in return.

it's a lot easier for him to be confident with that kind of sex/perspective on sex, because he knows he can just tap into his emotions and those of his partner. he really shines here, and he may still get a bit flustered because it's sex and sex with you and you're so fucking gorgeous in every imaginable way, but you still get to see this whole other side of him where he's just so comfortable in his skin and it's both really hot and really endearing.

he stops sort of separating or thinking too hard on just the physical or the mental or anything else, and expresses his love on all levels of being in a way that just lights you both up. he thinks being with you in this way is heaven on earth and he will let you know it.

he can make love with you like this anywhere soft and quiet and private, but aside from your bed, he loves the bath. he loves bath sex in general for the warmth and wetness and intimacy, and especially when you're connecting in this way, it's like.... he wouldn't consider himself to be poetic or particularly spiritual, but there's just something special about making love in water, maybe because we're all born from water, we all need water to live, all life on earth came first from the water. it's just something he thinks about.

he'll want to be face to face; he loves watching your face because seeing you in pleasure is so beautiful to him, he'll want to see your eyes flutter closed and open and commit the look you give him to memory, soft and sort of honeyed-hazy y'know but bright because you love him, and you're loved by him, and he can see it in you. he'll want to hold hands too, and twine your fingers together.

words come a lot easier to him like this too, because he knows there's nothing to hide and nothing to worry about, so he'll just murmur throughout about how much he loves you, how good you make him feel in every way, how he wants to make you feel like that too. show him that he does; he'll kiss you so softly and with so much love that he feels like he could burst.

he's just so soft and gentle in every way. he'll want to still just hold your hand for a long time afterwards.

formaggio 🧀

he's very emotionally in tune, that connection u create with a partner no matter how casual is a huge part of his enjoyment of sex, so he absolutely loves taking all the time in the world to just feel each other in every way and be so emotionally close with you

he often likes to feel like a big macho guy taking care of his babe but he loves being taken care of too because he can experience another side of your connection (and it's just nice!!!!), so when he really makes love with his partner he can feel sort of both at the same time and he loves it. he just feels so entwined with you.

he's still playful, it's in his nature. but when y'all get really tendie he'll be especially gentle with how he plays around. he'll tweak your nose and kiss your neck to hear you giggle, he just loves to make his partner laugh and he's laughing and smiling too

he also still talks a lot, he murmurs about how much he loves you and how incredible you are, how you make him feel amazing in every way, he'll list off all the little things he notices about you that he's just so fond of. he doesn't tease as much, he just grounds himself in the moment with you. it's also really hot and sweet to hear his words trail off with little laughs or sighs or soft moans.

he also has a lot of cute pet names for his partner, and he does still use them but when you get really soft like this he'll often just murmur or moan your name more than anything and there's something so intimate about it

overall you'll see an even more genuine side of formaggio (and he's already a pretty down to earth dude) because he really just feels most at ease when he's surrounded by love

he'll snuggle and kiss you and lay around for a long time afterwards, play with your hair, stroke your back, talk about everything and nothing and how much he loves you. his wandering hands may lead to more lovemaking; he just can't get enough of you.

illuso ✨

it takes a lot for illuso to open up like that. he's extremely guarded with his emotions. he very much desires softness, and there's something about being bare (more than just physically) that really draws him in, but he'd need a lot of trust to get there.

and it's not just him trusting you that's part of the equation either; he isn't used to being trusted. show him honestly that you trust him, and treat every glimpse of genuineness from him with love, and it'll go right to his heart. he's unused to being really seen, so if you see who he is and choose to openly share your heart with him, he'll be smitten.

ask him to just be with you, and he will, he'd love nothing more. reassure him that he doesn't have to think so much; you can both just let go and feel. you'll see a side of illuso where he's just in awe and a really pure sort of wonder of what you create together, this little moment in time and space, this experience across all states of being.

you absolutely make love in the mirror world. it's illuso's safe haven, and he wants it to be yours as well, it's an entire world where there's no one and nothing but the two of you and the love you make and that's so special to him. he'll want to take his time, and with no possible interruptions, he can. you spend hours together; he goes very slow and very gentle. he just wants you to know how precious you are to him, and how much he wants to be with you.

you'll explore every single inch of each other. he'll kiss you absolutely everywhere, and not just in the obvious places; he'll kiss your palms, your fingers, your closed eyelids, every mark on your skin. when he kisses your lips, it ranges everywhere from a mere brush to open-mouthed, deep, and languid. treat him with the same slow, thorough care, and he'll melt.

he doesn't tease. he'll probably be pretty quiet, but once he whispers that he loves you, he'll find himself just telling you all his inner thoughts, everything he loves about you and everything you make him feel: truly beautiful in a way he'd hardly experienced before, safe, so genuinely loved. if you express the same to him, that you feel his love for you in every little way he shows it and cares, that you see and feel his whole self and love him in his entirety, that he makes you feel precious, he will feel precious too. he may actually cry a bit. he's just so happy with you.

he's the kind of guy who likes to watch everything, but he's not sure what to do now: see the love in your eyes or close his eyes to bask in it. he opts to just go with the flow of the moment. he's completely open and unguarded, his hair is loose (if you run your fingers through it he'll sigh sweetly), he'll give you these genuine smiles, you'll get real little laughs out of him, and every sound he makes (including the way he murmurs your name) is so soft.

he can't stop smiling after, he'll hold you and play with your hair, and eventually draw a nice bath for you to share

melone 🍈

he absolutely loves soft, emotional sex. of course he likes being kinky and stuff too, but human sexuality as a whole is so fascinating to him, sex is such a beautiful experience in his eyes and he's very eager to explore different expressions of it. it's really interesting to him how you can define making love as something different than fucking when it's all still sex.

he loves the connection it brings. it's such a deep, personal way to feel close with someone and he wants that with you, he wants to explore each other in every way. he loves to learn new things about his partner and finds it so intimate when they learn about him too, whether it's something you've always done that he's just putting his finger on or it's a new development, like the particular way you roll your hips or how your eyes squeeze shut when you cum. point out a subtle habit of his too, like how his breath stutters when you do something he really likes; it makes him feel cared for. but even if there's nothing new to notice, he loves the comfort of your familiarity, too.

he's very open with it, you don't have to wonder what he's thinking about. he'll be murmuring softly about your beauty, how much he cherishes you, how you make him feel cherished too, how good you're making him feel. he wants to know if he's making you feel good, too. tell him so--better yet, show him--and let him know that you feel his love for you, that you feel cared for and safe. he'll smile and give you a long, sweet kiss. tell him anything and everything you're thinking of, he wants to know you in mind, body and soul.

and he is spiritually open and explorative and it fascinates him to think of sex as an act of creation, and even if it isn't sex to make new life it's making love, it's making a bond, and that's a special sort of creation too. he loves to create with you. he understands how it could be viewed as sort of divine.

he loves to care for you, and being cared for in turn makes him putty. knowing that he's truly loved is one of the best feelings ever and it really just makes him wanna cover your face in kisses tbh. which he does, and he laughs hearing you laugh cause you bring him joy.

he's also still loud when he cums but that doesn't make it any less soft and tender tbh because he's just wholeheartedly falling into the bliss you give him, he'll cry out your name and how much he loves you between moans.

he'll want to do this all day if that's what you want too. eventually when you're done, he'll cuddle you, kiss you, and still murmur all his thoughts to you while you both trace patterns in each other's skin.

ghiaccio ❄️

he gets really flustered about soft, emotional sex at first. not just because he's being vulnerable with you, but you're being vulnerable with him, and it's you, and he cares about you so much.

part of him is almost kind of worried he'll never be gentle enough. help him see that's not true, because he absolutely is gentle with you; he knows he can be brash which is why he's always so careful with you, especially in softer moments. you also love him for who he is, in his entirety, and that makes his heart glow. you trust him, and he trusts you.

ghiaccio is passionate, and he can still express that fire in him softly and tenderly. he'll hold your face in both hands while he kisses you, and while he doesn't necessarily kiss hard, he's thorough, and it mellows out into something very soft and subtle before he pulls away. his pace is slowed a lot, because he wants to just feel you in every way; he really relaxes into the rhythm of something slow and gentle, but still passionate, holding your gaze with his hands never leaving your body. thinking of sex as a way to express your love for each other, he can't help but slow down and be soft, cause it's you.

he also can't help but make noise, soft as it may be, and say your name. he doesn't half ass important things, and you're so, so important to him, so he just completely wraps himself in your love and does the same for you. express that, with him, you know you're loved and safe; he'll want to kiss you again and again and again until you're both breathless.

may not talk as much, because soft words don't really come easily to him and he's sort of self-conscious about it, but once he gets really into it and he does start talking he doesn't stop: he'll say how much he loves you and how badly he just wants to show that to you, how you're so hot and gorgeous and loving, and he doesn't really think of them as flowery words because they're just truth, and his penchant for honesty is such a wonderful way to know you're loved

ghiaccio honey why on earth were u worried about not being gentle. after he's cum once or twice and he's gotten some energy out he is so, so gentle, he'll take care of you so tenderly and kiss you softly. he just wants to be close with you.

his cuddly side always comes out after sex and he'll be no different now. he'll press you against him and hook his chin over your shoulder and tangle your legs together, his cuddles are the best. you definitely get him smiling too, cause you make him happy.

sorbet and gelato 🔪🍦

they're both fucking crazy in nearly all aspects of life and that includes sex, but they're also very passionate and very in love with each other and with you; they're no strangers to tender, emotional sex and they love it because it's such a wonderful way to be so deeply close.

they have no problems being bare and open with you. they're so in their feelings all the time that it feels really natural; they'll very openly express how much they love you, all the ways they love you, how deep and powerful that love feels that they just want to surround all of you in it.

gelato is more talkative in that sense, he'll spill all his feelings in between kisses with his hands on either side of your face. sorbet will give you a long, slow, deep kiss, meet your eyes, and place your hand over his heart while your foreheads touch. you just know.

you're all tracing every inch of each other while you make love, they want to know everything because they just can't get enough of you, the entire world is the three of you. they're absolutely basking in your attention, too; kiss every scar and let them know how beautiful they are to you, that you see them and you love them, that they have your heart as much as you have theirs. they'll melt.

you're safe with them. let them know that you feel how deeply they love you and you feel their safety, and that they're safe with you too, that they're precious. having you and each other as their safe havens and being taken care of makes them feel so damn much.

they'll both still get very playful, they can never take anything too seriously and they just love you so much, they want you all to have fun together. gelato will absolutely do that thing where he kisses down ur front like he's gonna go down on u and then blow a raspberry on your tummy to make you squeak (but then he does still go down on you and doesn't break eye contact the whole time so you can see how fucking much he loves you and wants to make you feel good). if you're ticklish, sorbet will definitely sneakily tickle you, or do something really good while you're in the middle of murmuring something to hear you devolve into moans. then he'll press his loving smirk against your skin. they wanna get you both laughing and moaning, it's the best sound in the world to them, and they'll be right there with you.

gelato is still loud when he laughs and when he cums but it's so sweet and charming because that's just who he is and he's absolutely embracing how you both make him feel. sorbet is the quieter one, but he'll hum and sigh and murmur your names because he loves how they feel in his mouth. he will also whisper to both of you that he loves you because he just wants to say it in every way.

they can go all day and they'll absolutely want to. if one of you needs a break, you'll just watch the other two and kiss them and hold them, the way you all love each other is so beautiful to them. when you're all well and truly done, you'll be tangled in a heap (they are always very cuddly) and they'll both be smiling as they just lazily caress and kiss you and each other.

[billiedeanhwrd]

as long as you are with me, there's no place i'd rather be

billie dean howard x fem!reader

summary: when your conservative parents kick you out for dating billie, she is more than happy to take you in🤍

warnings: age difference, mention of homophobic parents

word count: 1.7k

a/n: thank u sm for all the positive feedback on my last fic!! i'm still new to this and learning, but i'm having a lot of fun writing <3 i apologize for any grammar errors, as english is not my first language. i still hope you enjoy reading my new fic, i'd describe it as a comfort fic with lots of fluff!<33

gif credits to @honeybeawhore

billie was lying on her couch with a glass of her favorite rosé in one hand and a copy of one flew over the cuckoo's nest in the other. It had been a long and exhausting day at work and she really needed some quality time to herself.

the weather was terrible today, lucky for her and her crew that they shot everything inside today. billie could tell in the morning that a storm was coming, and now it was pouring rain.

the sound of the rain hitting the ground and the crackling of her fireplace created the perfect reading ambience. just as she was about to turn to a page in her book, her doorbell startled her. who the hell was standing in front of her mansion in this weather? at this time?

she checked the monitor connected to her security cameras that she had built in next to the front door only to see you completely soaked, and visibly freezing on her doorstep.

she unlocked the door as quickly as she could and ushered you inside. "y/n, what are you doing here?"

"i'm sorry this is the only place i could go", you managed to stutter out. you had been dating the medium for a few months now, but had never actually stayed over at her place. you were special to billie and she didn't want to risk ruining the connection between you two by going to fast. she wanted this relationship to be different from the ones she's had before, and given your rather big age difference, taking it slow seemed right to both of you.

"what hap-you know what that's not important right now, let's get you warmed and dried up first"

you followed your girlfriend into her luxurious gold-white themed bathroom and watched her as she searched for the softest towel she owned.

"here, feel free to take a hot shower first" she handed you a towel, "i'll lay out some comfortable clothes for you on the bed in the guest room, it's the room right next to this one." you nodded thankfully. "I'll wait for you in the kitchen, sweetheart" she smiled at you with that loving look in her coffee colored eyes that warmed your heart so much, you almost didn't need the shower.

you entered billie's guest bedroom feeling as if you'd just left a spa. the medium had a colossal collection of all kinds of sensual soaps, shampoos and moisturizers in her bathroom and you came out smelling like a scented candle. her guest bedroom was beautifully decorated, it was clear the older woman had great taste and invested a lot of time in the design of her home.

after drying yourself and putting on dry underwear, you glanced towards the bed. billie had laid out a baby blue burberry hoodie with matching sweatpants for you. you felt nervous thinking about wearing her clothes, especially these, not only because they were obviously expensive but also because you had seen her wear this before, you knew she liked this set and you were afraid of ruining it. all of your negative thoughts left your mind though when you carefully put on the comfortable clothes and let her sweet smell engulf you.

you treaded lightly down the stairs to the kitchen where billie was waiting for you with a freshly brewed cup of chamomile tea. she gestured for you to sit down on the high chair facing her at the countertop.

"you look cute in my clothes". you blushed. "thank you, billie, but you didn't have to give me something so costly, anything would've been alright"

"nonsense, darling" she replied, "only the best for you". she gently squeezed your hand. you looked at her like some kind of love-struck teenager, but before you could say anything, she spoke up again.

"now tell me, what caused you to walk through a storm all by yourself in the dark? you could've gotten hurt", the worried look in her eyes made your heart ache.

you looked down in embarrassment at your other hand, that wasn't covered by billie's, but placed in your lap. "my parents kicked me out". billie raised an eyebrow at you. "i know living with your parents in your late 20s isn't ideal, but i couldn't afford to move out yet" she nodded along, signaling you to continue.

"and i stupidly left my phone in the living room and when i got a new notification they saw my lockscreen...", billie tilted her head questioningly "what's your lockscreen, y/n?".

you were to shy to tell her, so you got your phone out of the hoodie's front pocket and slid it toward the medium. you heard billie chuckle,

"aww, since when am i your lockscreen, babygirl?"

you smiled sheepishly. "since that photo was taken"

your wallpaper was a picture of billie holding you close and kissing your cheek. it was taken at your first official date, she had brought you to disney land after you expressed your interest in going there and even if it might not be her thing, seeing the joy in your face and knowing she was responsible for it, made it totally worth it.

both of you looked so happy on that picture, it bewildered billie why anyone would get upset about it and you could tell, by the confused look on her face.

"i didn't tell my parents i was seeing you, they would've never approved... clearly", you explained. billie was about to ask if their issue was the age difference between you two, something she was still a little insecure about, when you continued speaking, "i knew they didn't accept gay people, but i never thought they'd set me out on the street... their own daughter", you swiped the tears away that had escaped your eyes. "i'm really sorry about showing up uninvited this late, but you were the only person i could and wanted to go to"

billie quickly made her way over to you from the other side of the countertop. "come here", you practically fell into her arms and she was more than ready to catch you, literally and metaphorically speaking.

you didn't know what exactly had set you off, telling the story about how you were suddenly homeless or the fact that for the first time in your life, you had someone you could really count on, who was there for you when you needed them and didn't make you feel like a burden for showing emotion, but you were sobbing in billie's arms. she didn't mind though, she held you close to her heart and let you cry your feelings out.

when your breathing slowed down and the crying subsided, she pressed a kiss on your head and tenderly took your face into her hands. "i'm so so sorry they did that to you, no one deserves to be abandoned by their own parents for loving someone", she softly swiped the remaining tears on your face away, "you can stay with me, as long as you want to, sweetheart"

your eyes lit up, "really? billie you don't have to let me live with you if it makes you uncomfortable just because you pity me...", you tried to argue

"i wouldn't offer if i was uncomfortable, darling, and i don't pity you, i care about you"

"okay" you reluctantly agreed, still unsure about living with her when you've never even spent the night together. billie could read you so well, she knew exactly what you were worried about.

"honey, this doesn't mean we stop taking this slow, okay? we don't have to do anything tonight or anytime you're not ready"

you nearly melted at her considerate words, "thank you, billie", you lovingly squeezed her in a quick hug.

"of course", she squeezed you back.

you yawned against her, which made billie chuckle and check her watch.

"it's already past midnight, what do you say we go to bed now, hm?" you nodded sleepily. "would you like to stay with me or sleep in the guest bedroom?" she asked kindly.

you thought about it for a second and then timidly replied, "i think i'd like to stay with you, if that's okay"

"it's more than okay, love"

billie stood up and grabbed your hand to guide you to her bedroom, which wasn't necessary , you'd follow her voluntarily anywhere but you definitely weren't complaining.

"wait for me in the bathroom, right there" she pointed behind you, "i'll bring you some comfy pajamas". billie swiftly entered the room in front of you, which you assumed was her bedroom and came out with a pair of shorts and an oversized t-shirt. "i hope this okay", you nodded and made your way to the bathroom to change.

after changing out of billie's clothes into a new set of her clothes that luckily also smelled like her, you headed towards her bedroom. she was already waiting for you when you arrived, but you had to stop in your tracks to admire the view.

billie's exquisite taste in interior design was again displayed in her elegant, yet cosy looking bedroom, her cream colored walls matched perfectly with her blush colored king sized bed, armchair and lamps. but what captivated you the most was the woman in this resplendent room. billie was wearing a lacy, low cut, rose gold, satin pajama set, which made her look even more sexy and at the same time angelic than she usually did.

she patted the space beside her, eager for you to join her. you switched off the lights and climbed into her bed. billie was laying on her side, turned towards you and instinctively took you into her arms when you settled into the bed, you embraced the older woman and possessively placed your leg on top of hers.

"goodnight, billie" you whispered before sleep was able to consume you. "goodnight, honey" she whispered back.

you nuzzled her neck affectionately and placed your head on her chest, listening to her heartbeat. the storm was still going strong outside and you were overwhelmed with love and gratitude for your girlfriend. ending the day cuddled up in her bed was not something you expected. Sure, today started off horribly, but at the end of the day, you were safe and warm, next to someone who really cared for you, and you wouldn't want to exchange that for anything in the world.

[gb-patch]

Ask Answers: January 28th, 2021 (Part 2)

Here we’ve got asks that aren’t to ask a question but are just really nice messages. Thank you all for sending us such kind comments ;v;. It’s seriously heartwarming to see so many people having good experiences with the game. I don’t even know what to say to such sweet responses.

We’ll keep doing our best and thank you again to each and every one of you for giving Our Life a chance ❤!

Hello! I've been following this account and have been following the development of 'Our Life' for a few months now, and I just wanted to say thank you for all your hard work and dedication you have put into the game. It astonishes me how much choice you have during the sequence of Our Life and am excited to play the full version now, I am downloading it as I write this message. I've had a great time seeing the demo transition into to the full game and just wanted to write two words. Thank you.

Anhhhhffbgdfbhujk!!! Congratulations on the release, I’m playing the game right now! Thank you all for your hard work and I can’t wait for the Step 3 DLC to come out, I’ll probably wait for the Step 3 DLC to come out to experience everything, but until then, I still have a lot to play. Thank you once again!

finished my first playthrough just now. it just felt so wholesome ??? 100/10 would do it again. i laughed. i cried. i got angry. i felt second-hand embrassment— i got so into it i was left in literal tears after getting my first ending. the art, the storyline, the music, and COVE HOLDEN– UGH IT WAS LITERAL PERFECTION ❤ THE WAIT WAS WORTH IT. THANK YOU FOR MAKING SUCH AN AMAZING GAME 🥺😭 this made my 2020 better, i can't wait for step 4 in 2021 ❤❤

So I was following you guys on itchio for years and uhh did I stay up til 6 am on a school night to finish the game? Yes. Did I sob my eyes out during step 3 as a 20 year old having doubts about life and adulthood? Absolutely. I can't form proper sentences right now due to lack of sleep but just wanted to say thank you for making it. I honestly feel lighter and I feel like it changed my views on future to be more optimistic... I can't wait to replay it! Thanks again!

I love how Our Life turned out!! I keep replaying it and can't stop squeaking and giggling!! Thank You for creating it ♥

okay i have actually fallen in love with cove and cannot WAIT to marry him 😭

Hi! I played through 'Our Life' yesterday and  I just wanna say how refreshing it was to be able to have Cove be 'high initiative' and also have so many opportunities to initiate affection from the player character! As a pretty flirtatious/affectionate person myself, I notice that a lot of VNs don't give players that agency, and affection can be kinda 'carrot on a stick' if that makes sense. You guys did an awesome job! I look forward to seeing if there are more of those moments in Step 3 & 4 :)

I have to say I was pleasantly surprised by the option to choose Cove's level of initiative in step 3! As much I love the option to choose I personally enjoy have the romanced character take the lead without my input so when I got to step 3 and had to option to make it so that Cove initiated affection without as much input from me I was really happy! You guys seriously added so much freedom in terms of choices, it's almost baffling that the only thing you have to pay for is optional DLC!

I absolutely loved everything about the game and I really want congratulate the team for making the game such a satisfying experience.

I look forward to step 4

❤️❤️❤️❤️

* and sorry for my bad English

Just finished my first play through and I loved it! I've been looking forward to the game and it definitely was worth the wait. Thank you all for your hard work and can't wait for the extra dlc!

Till then, hope you guys gets some well deserved rest🤗

Love you guys, thank you so much for your hard work. :)

Ok, so I just finished Our Life and, wow. I have never cried at a video game before, ever. Thank you so, so much! Its one of my favorites.

this isn't a question, but i just wanted to say how much i enjoyed our life 🥺 i've been patiently looking forward to the full game for a few months now, and i couldn't be happier with it! i've only played through it once so far but the outcomes of the choices i made were all so soft and wholesome 💗 i can tell that everyone who was involved really worked hard and you all did an incredible job! i can't wait to see what else is in store 👍

i’d just like to say how addictive our life is!!! i constantly played it during quarantine and now playing the full release is so amazing to me!! i love that i’m still discovering dialogue bits with different personalities and actions!!! i have to admit that i’ve been wishing the day to pass faster all day during school so i could go home and play again. mentally i’m not the healthiest and our life being released has boosted it up so much, thank you for creating such an amazing game!!!!!

Hey, I just wanna say I played our life two times and it still give me the same feelings. I was really looking forward to this game before it came out and I kept on replaying the demo. This game is such an amazing experience and I feel so happy playing it. I am not really a person good with words unfortunately but I do honestly love this more than anything in the world. Thank you for making it and I hope that you will continue to make more games like our life. This game really makes me happy and I can't thank you enough

Just wanted to say that Our Life really made me feel seen as an 18 year old trans man who's been struggling with change as of late and I can't thank you guys enough for it. I just finished the main story and currently released DLC's and gosh, I can really only say... woah. Just, woah. The messages are somehow exactly what I needed to hear right now, and they brought me a lot of comfort in this really weird and confusing time in my life. Can't wait to see what comes next in this lovely story <3

I am honestly in love with Our Life. The graphics, the soundtrack its just *chef's kiss* It was so worth the wait for it. I can't wait for step 4. Keep up the good work GB Patch!

good people i have just finished Our Life and let me say, it was beautiful. rarely have such non-fantastical moments (and even some fantastical moments) brought me to tears like this game has, and i don't even have the dlc (yet). i don't know how you did it but it felt like i was playing a slice of life anime. i had waited with baited breath to play this since i played the demo and my expectations were not just met but surpassed. from the bottom of my heart thank you for this game

I found the game by chance and I am so so glad I did. It’s so inclusive and made me feel so incredibly seen. Seeing that my gender identity and sexuality were possible just meant the absolute world to me. I’ve never seen something like this and it just made me so incredibly happy. Thank you for the absolutely amazing game and I can’t wait to see what’s next.

Hello! I downloaded Our life earlier this week and I'm only now getting the chance to play it (Very busy and stressful week) I'm so excited to play and I wanna say thank you for making this adorable game!

I just finished my first playthrough of Our Life and I can't even express how much I love it. Cove is absolutely precious and has killed me several times, and the art and soundtrack is beautiful. I love all the small different choices. I'm very interested in the Derek and Baxter DLCs and the rest, can't wait!!!!!!

thank you for "Our Life Beginnings & Always" it has to be one of the best visual novels i ever have played and i just dont want it to end (i know it will, but damn it! i want to have a wedding night, have children and die of old age with cole! XD) when i play it it always makes me tear up (in a good way) and i am most definetly going to buy all the dlc that you make! thank you for this lovely game and all the work that went into it! (ps: i also loved "lake of voices" )

You guys are incredibly talented and im very proud of you all! You've really outdone yourselves w/ OL and i cant wait to see whats next to come for you all :)

i really love that you can be trans in Our Life! not a lot of games do that so i just wanted to say thank you!

Guuyyss!! I just wanna say! Thank you sm for the headscarf option in the MC creator! I especially loved that little detail where MC quickly slips the headscarf on before greeting Cove, I've never felt so immersed :'D Not that the rest of the game wasn't immersive btw, but since I wear my hijab most of the time that little addition really felt like something I would do! So thank you for that <3

I've been watching "Our Life: Beginnings & Always" development for quite some time, and I gotta say its wild to see it finally release. Its so unique in the way relationships work- even character creation. I've cried multiple times over this game while playing. I can't thank y'all enough for a game with these kind of mechanics, and representation. its rare I get to feel im really playing as myself in games like these. Everyones outdone themselves. this'll certainly be one I keep coming back to.

I've been following the development of Our Life from way back when the first demo dropped and it still blows my mind how many choices and customizations there are (love that update for the MC's bedroom btw!) and the fact that the game remembers them - it really feels like your very own coming of age story! I was so immersed I cried at the end :') Can't believe I experienced this game for free lol. I can't wait for future DLCs and Step 4! Good luck with all your upcoming projects dev team!!

Just wanted to say I love Our Life and I'm thankful it exists. Thank you so much! I love the little world you created and all the people in it. Especially Cove! This game makes me so happy!

Just poping in to say hi and that ilu guys ^^, remember to take care of yourselves!

Hi!! I just wanna thank you for creating such an amazing game. Our Life is one of the few dating sims I’ve found that let’s me be a male mc, it’s really hard to find dating sims that let me be gay. Our Life is my new favorite dating sim to just sit down and playthrough whenever I’m having a bad day so I just wanted to let y’all know how much I appreciate all you’ve done. 🤍

Fan from australia here

Just wanted to reach out and let you know how important this game has been to me. I came across it at a really rough time ( that I’m still going through ) and it’s been one of the things that’s driven me to get up and out of bed sometimes.

This game and cove both hold a very special place in my heart and I can’t wait to see more of him in the DLC and Step 4

Much love ♥️

I know this isnt exactly the main focus of the game, but i really love how we can customise the mc personality wise! This is the first time i've played a game like this where the mc actually does and says exactly what I would do and say in certain situations and its such a breath of fresh air!! It's also so cool how the other characters can pick up on it!!

Cove Holden saved 2020 (my 2020 anyways) I would die for him

Sorry for this being out of the blue, but after playing through Our Life I wanted to thank you for the experience. I don’t know if I’ve ever played a game that has made me cry happy tears TWICE lol. It’s beautiful, scenic, inclusive, and absolutely amazing..have a great rest of 2020 and I honestly cannot wait for the rest of it :,) (ps. The ending song is stuck in my head)

I think you guys might've ruined visual novels for me forever. I'm not sure I'll be able to play another without comparing it to Our Life and I know if I do that I'll be disappointed every time because of how amazing it is. I bought the DLCs before playing the base game it's one of the best impulsive purchases I've ever made

Thank you so much for making our life! It's my favorite visual novel ever and I just can't articulate how much being able to just be honest with my responses instead of going for whatever would make the love interest happy means to me? I reccomended it to evry friend I have that plays visual novels because this is the best one I've ever played!

Just wanted to say that I absolutely adore this game! The childhood friends tropes is my favorite thing and this game delivers! Cove is the sweetest thing, infact all the boys are good boys. Super excited for all upcoming dlcs!

Hi, I just want to thank you for making such an amazing game like Our Life. Tbh, I was following the game’s development for a while, but me and my family moved away from my childhood town just a few days before release, so I really connected to this game. You all did amazing!

hey just wanted to know that i completely loved ol: b&a and it was so good and love cove more than i’ve liked any fictional character, it’s now my comfort media. thank you so much

hi i just wanna say i really enjoyed all of the representation in our life b&a! there were characters with a lot of different body shapes, pic characters, lgbtq+ characters, and you get to choose your own pronouns and sexuality!!! so tysm!!

This isn't a question, I just wanted to say that Our Life is incredible. Ever since I finished it, I've been looking for other visual novels to play so I don't play OL so often that I start memorizing the lines before all the DLC comes out, but I keep coming back to it. It's really one of a kind, I think you all ruined other visual novels for me because I haven't enjoyed another VN like I have this one since I read it ❤.

i think our life b&a is the first game where i felt like cove loved me, not the character i play as which is really nice for someone with kinda low self esteem so THANK YOU

I’ve been playing Our Life practically nonstop since yesterday. I just want everyone who worked on it to know how much the LGBTQ inclusivity means to me. As a closeted trans ace guy in an unsupportive household, I can’t emphasize how much of a comfort this game has been to me. Everything about it is so wholesome and heartfelt. I’m excited to see what other games you make in the future 💙

- A demibiromantic ace transgender man who may or may not have cried over the option to be myself in a game for the first time ever

Csn i just say i really appreciate how you handled MC deciding to use they/them at different stages. Mainly because alot of games don't pay much attention to the body the mc was assigned at birth if they player chooses nonbinary like it does with male/female. And it was just nice to be able to play an mc who just thought gender was kinda 'meh' for them but still felt good about the body they were born with (like myself). I guesd it boils down I'm really appreciative of the hard work it must've taken for you to make all those options possible & still have them matter.

I just wanted to thank you all for Our Life. My mental health hasn't been in a good place recently and it has become my favorite form of escapism/way to cheer up. It's idyllic setting and fantastic characters are such a good way to wind down, I love it. Also, I've been dreading 2021 due to classes starting and general stress, but the DLC and your next project have given me something to actually look forward to :). I'm so excited for them and now I actually have a reason to be happy that it's 2021. Sorry if this message is a bit weird, I just wanted to thank the team for their hard work and for creating something so incredible <3

I've gotta say this is one of the most repayable games I've ever played, if not the most. Usually after i do a playthrough or two of a game i have to wait awhile before playing again otherwise it feels stale. But i haven't had that problem with our life because of the sheer ammount of player agency. Everyone who works on tbe game should feel incredibly proud of themselves because you've created something amazing.

I just wanted to say thank you for Our Life. I'm sure you get this a lot, but it really pulled me out of a mentally tough spot in my life. So thank you.

who needs therapy when you have our life: beginnings and always? haha no but seriously this game is my comfort game, and even though i can’t join your patreon at the moment please know i am always supporting you and i am so excited to see everything you have in store! everyone who works on the games is so so talented

All DLCs have nice content. 😡😡

And I love them all!!💗💗💗💖💖💖💕💕💕

[sdvharveybby]

hey!!! ur stuff is AWESOME and i love it so here's 7 for... ya guessed it, harvey !! i love him sm <33

7- “I’m not going to like what you’re about to tell me…. am I?”

You’re such a good friend, thank you so much bby!! AHHHH! I truly appreciate your kind words.

Oh, inspiration with this was actually getting my ass absolutely handed to me in Sekiro. I just started the game today and as a Dark Souls 1+3 and Bloodborne’s veteran- oof that game kicks some serious ass. It’s certainly more forgiving than DS and BB, but jeez- it ain’t nice. No sunshine and rainbows there kiddos. 

Also, my asks are now reopened! I closed them because school has started, but I believe I can still manage asks- they’ll just take longer than my previous works. They’ll get done though!

This work is kinda angsty? but it ends all soft and happy. When I read this prompt- this is just the story I thought of, and I think it worked out! I’m happy with it at least :)

LOVE YOU BBY THANKS FOR THE ASK!!

Word Count: 1462

Early in the morning, about 5am, Harvey tossed and turned. His alarm had just gone off and he sat, upright, in his bed trying to wake up. With the Summer heat in full swing his apartment became a sauna, even at night with fans on him constantly the heat was almost unbearable. He made an effort to stay hydrated and still get moderate sleep, but something with today seemed off to him.

The farmer offered to go on a date with him to the beach, even through the summer heat he couldn’t say no. He recalls seeing the farmer seeming nervous and almost guilt ridden when they asked him, and it created a pit in his stomach that was unshakeable. He always worried quite a bit, but with his insecurities he feared that the farmer would rather be friends than stay in a relationship. His constant thinking was crushing, but he sincerely hoped that he was overthinking it.

Harvey stood, albeit slowly, and rubbed his face with his hands. He took the day off today as no one would be coming in for a checkup, and he asked for Maru to take his place while he ran a few errands and worked on his hobbies. Harvey and the farmers date didn’t happen until 2pm, so he figured he should get some outside work done. It would help distract him from his thoughts until then if he read and worked on one of his new model airplanes.

He made his way over to his kitchen and began brewing coffee. He wasn’t hungry enough yet to make any breakfast, but he wanted to watch the sun rise while enjoying his coffee. Once it finished brewing, he poured it into a cup with some creamer, and began to open up his curtains to let any light in. It was still dark outside as he did this, but slowly it grew lighter out and he watched the sun peak over the trees. Watching the sun rise was such a beautiful sight to him- something he enjoyed doing almost every morning. It seemed, to him, that there was always something new to discover when watching it rise- it gave him peace and warmth.

“I know I’m just overthinking it…” He quietly mumbled to himself as he sipped his coffee. “But what if they find me childish or…” Harvey didn’t let himself finish. He shook his head, trying to wipe any thoughts he had away, the pit in his stomach growing bigger. After watching the sun rise, he began working on his model airplane and it eased his mind whilst doing so.

He watched his clock tick to 1:30pm and he began to gather his things to leave. With heavy footsteps, he made his way down into the clinic and greeted Maru, “Thank you for taking over today. I needed some time to myself,” He gave her a soft smile. “No problem! Happy to help and have fun with your date today!” Maru wore an unusually big smile, but he grumbled in response as he stepped out the door. He wasn’t sure what to expect when meeting the farmer, but he didn’t want to hide from them forever. Whatever was going to happen today he made sure to face it head on, but with his thoughts- he wasn’t allowed much solace.

Harvey still wore a happy expression though, he wanted nothing more than for his anxiety to cease, but he wasn’t the type to purposefully worry anyone.

He made his way to the beach and upon entering it he saw the farmer sitting on one of the benches that provided shade. Harvey let out a noticeable gulp and headed towards them. The farmer turned and gave them a big smile as he sat down, “Hey, Harvey! How’d you sleep?” Harvey gave a quick chuckle, “Nothing like sleeping in a swimming pool,” He joked and hearing the farmers laugh eased his nerves. He felt so comfortable with them and it overjoyed him to see them smile and laugh- it always made his heart skip a beat. “How was the sun rise today? Bright and shiny?” They asked him and he smiled, “Oh, of course. Even with the summer heat- the sun always gives a more comfortable and acceptable heat. Something I’ll never get tired of…” He let his sentence trail off as he leaned forward resting his elbows on his knees and his hands holding up his chin. His nerves started to grow once again, but with the farmer at his side he couldn’t help but to feel happy and content. “So, Harvey… There’s something I want to talk to you about.” There it was. This fated sentence that had been driving Harvey partially mad. He tensed up at their words but eased when they felt the farmers hand on his back. He gulped once again, but with his posture- his hair hid his face. “I’m… not going to like what you’re about to tell me, am I?” He whispered to them and the farmers hand that was softly rubbing his back ceased.

There was a momentary pause as he said this, the farmer shifting in their seat. “We’ve been together for a while now and I genuinely enjoy every minute I’m with you…” Here it comes… Just stay calm- trust their decision no matter what it is, he thought to himself as he listened carefully to the words that came out of their mouth. His body grew more tense, but he didn’t look at them. If his worst fear came true, he didn’t want to particularly see it. “Harvey, why are you so tense? Are you okay?” Their kind words shocked him out of his mental prison, and he turned to give them a smile, “Of course, carry on.” He urged as he motioned his body back into his hunched over position.

“Harvey… Would you marry me?”

His eyes grew wide at the thought, the absolute tidal wave of relief washed over him as tears brimmed his eyes. His worst fears shattered, and he did his best to choke back his tears of relief and excitement. As he still didn’t look at them, the farmer dangled the familiar mermaid’s pendant in front of him. He watched it sway back and forth- the view of the beach blurred behind it.

Harvey took in a deep breath and let out his tears, he turned to the farmer and gave them a big smile, “Yes! I would absolutely love to marry you!” The farmer wore a shocked expression as they watched him, but it quickly softened into admiration and love. “What did you think I wanted to talk about?” They questioned him as he pulled a napkin from his pants pocket to blow his nose, “Ah-“ he started as he attempted to gather himself. “I was so worried that this talk would be about breaking up.” He admitted, he sat back into the bench and wiped his watery eyes on his shirt sleeve. “I hate to admit it, but I just destroyed myself at the thought. I didn’t want to just be friends with you- I love you more than I ever thought I would. The thought just terrified me is all.” The farmer moved to face him. He had no choice but to look at the farmer he loved so much, and he gave them a big smile. The farmer smiled back and cupped his cheeks, they leaned in for a kiss which he greatly accepted.

After which, he pulled them in for a hug, “I could never do that to you, Harvey.” The farmer began nuzzled in his chest, “Because truth is- I feel the same way. I love you so much that that thought alone also terrifies me too. We’re in this world together, never forget that.” Harvey let out a few more tears as he clutched onto them. All of his worries had faded away- his heart slowed, and he no longer felt so nervous and anxiety ridden. He felt loved, appreciated, and accepted. To be their fiancé was like a dream he never thought would come true, and Harvey couldn’t help but to smile at the thought.

It had been hours since they both got together at the beach. It was filled with conversations, marriage planning, and jokes. Neither of them seemed bothered by the summer heat, but the day grew darker as it slowly transitioned into night.

The same sun that he watched rise into the sky that morning now began to set and they both watched it with eager eyes as they held each other in a tight embrace.

He wore the mermaid’s pendant with great pride and showered the farmer in kisses- it was certainly a day that neither of them would forget.

[sweetpeaownsmyheart]

Just a Couple of Notes (Sweet Pea x Reader)

Hello friends! Sorry for the inactivity, I've had a lot going on and have been dealing with mental health but I haven’t forgotten you! I was so happy to come on today and find that someone has messaged me a request, my first one yay - so I should get that out soon! This is a lil idea I had late one night, I didn’t really know I was going with it but wanted to get something out and actually kinda like it!! (just a warning bc the plot is a bit naff lol) Love you all sm - stay safe and healthy xxx <3

Word Count - 2300

Warnings - umm not that I can think of! An odd plot maybe? Too fluffy? Very OOC Pea?

Summary - you write notes to SP when you start work at Pops, it’s not long before he responds. But then there’s a bump in the road!!

-----

You're move to Riverdale was a quick decision made by your parents in Autumn when a new job opportunity arose. Within a week you were packed up and moving to the town leaving behind your friends, other family members and the quiet life you had gotten used to.

Riverdale was an odd place to you. You were used to the comforts and quirks of your hometown and for that reason your attention felt drawn to the awkwardness and divide and, what seemed to be lurking beneath the surface in your new neighbourhood.

It was about a week after your move that you had noticed the 'help wanted' sign in the window of Pops and were pushed to apply by Jughead who you had met the first night you had come to town. Besides Jug, you kept yourself to yourself, limiting your interactions to with your family and customers. Of course, it wasn't for others lack of trying, often Betty or one of Jughead's other friends would talk to you.  However, you knew that when you were old enough, you would move back to your hometown so didn't want to create too many ties.

That all changed when Sweet Pea started frequenting the diner.

He had come in asking for Jughead before noticing him in the corner and hurrying over. The way he sat with his shoulders hunched over and stony expression was intriguing to you, but you were quick to learn that he was as much of a 'mystery' as you were.

He always wore black in some way, had dog-tags round his neck that you longed to wrap your hand around and a curl on his forehead that you wanted to push back into place. If it wasn't for the few times that you saw him with Fangs and Toni, you would have thought him incapable of feeling joy but the way his face broke into a smile and his laugh carried across the diner was enough to make anyone's heart beat faster.

You were smitten with a boy you didn't know, the boy who was pegged as 'trouble' by Jughead when you asked about him.

Soon your want to know him overtook your want to keep to your solitude and that was when the notes started - that way you could still keep him at a distance.

-----

It was around 8pm on a Sunday that the first instance happened as Sweet Pea came to pay for his groups dinner. You had heard him complaining earlier that evening about how his English teacher was going to fail him if he didn't pass his next test with flying colours and you had subsequently spent your break writing out quotes from the book Jug had mentioned they were studying and exam tips you had found on google.

You passed the napkin to him along with his receipt and quickly left to serve another group (and avoid any embarrassment) missing the look on confusion on his face.

As you finished serving the table you turned back around you met his gaze as he reached the door. He threw you a quick wink and walked out leaving you standing with your heart racing and head spinning.

-----

For you it became common place after that day. Whenever Pea visited the diner, he left with a little note on a napkin that you wrote on your break. The notes ranged from help with school when you had overheard he was struggling to random facts you found or occasionally a cheesy pick up line. If you plucked up the courage to look, you often saw him smiling down at the notes when he thought no one was looking which made it worth it. You didn't expect a response, but it was something fun to do, and although the thought crossed your mind that maybe he it was making him feel awkward, he hadn't told you to stop so you continued.

He didn't respond, until one day he did.

You had just closed up for the night and were cleaning the tables when you noticed a napkin on the table where he had been sitting. You had given him a list of songs to listen to that day, slipped it onto the table as they paid and you hadn't seen anything then so were wondering if Sweet Pea had thought it odd and left the note but as you approached you saw the writing was not as light as yours. It had more of a scrawl to it.

'Don't walk home over the bridge today - Sweet Pea

PS. I like (your favourite band) and I like getting these notes :)'

And that's how your interactions were from that point onwards, he gave you a warning or a place to stay away from and sometimes something personal about him and you gave him a fact or compliment or anything you could think of. It wasn't much but it suited you both and you had had a few conversations with Toni and Fangs about how much he liked you and now a bigger part of you wanted to stay.

That was until Josie came along.

You had met Josie before, a couple of times, but your conversations were always limited to taking her order and the general waitressing 'stuff'. She seemed nice enough, but you hadn't seen her with a serpent before and since you were home schooling you didn't even know she knew them (besides Jug).

She sat with Pea for hours. Just the two of them. They spoke in whispers and you often caught at least one of them sending you quick glances. You did not want to infringe on them so let one of the other waitresses serve them both ignoring her questions on why there was a sudden change.

You thought back to all the longing looks, all the flirting both in notes and over your waitressing and of the fact it all was or at least seemed reciprocated.

That was the first time since you had first served him that he left without a note.

-----

He didn't come in again for another week or so. Everything was getting on top of you and your plan to move back 'home' was once again in your mind despite weeks of not speaking to your 'friends' or thinking of your life before Riverdale.

You felt odd. You knew that you had no ties to this place besides Jug but one part of you thought your plans to move away were based on the actions of Sweet Pea rather than your lack of connections.

You knew that you had no real relationship with the boy, it was only notes passed back and forth. You couldn't claim to know him or be his friend as you hadn't exactly spoken much but one part of you felt drawn to him and hurt that he didn't feel that too - he would rather step out with Josie.

If looks could kill, in that moment, both Sweet Pea and Jughead would be dead from each other’s stares. Jug was your confidant on all Sweet Pea matters. He had listened to you gush about how adorable Sweets was and in the last week had listened to your complaints. He knew that the actions of Sweet Pea may drive you to leave and he desperately did not want you to leave.

So here in the diner at 11pm, glares were thrown towards Pea by Jug who was sat with you whilst you were on your break. And glares were thrown right back in his (or your?) direction by Sweet Pea who had settled in a booth by himself.

You were the only one working that night so knew that you would have to serve him eventually so as your break ended, and Jug left the diner you walked over to him.

'what can I get you?' you said breaking the unsettling silence.

'Just the usual please.'

'And what would that be?' You knew his order. Of course you did. But part of you felt spiteful and hurt and you wanted him to feel that too. But you regretted it immediately when he turned to you with a look of sadness on his face.

'Come on Y/N. You know my order. I've only not been in for a week.' Maybe he was trying to joke to get rid of the tension.

'Yeh maybe I do and maybe in the week you've been MIA, you've forgotten that we don't serve food after 11. So, I'll ask again, what can I get you?'

'Just a chocolate shake please.'

You walked off to make the drink but were pulled back by a strong hand and a falsely strong voice. 'When were you going to mention in one of you notes that you're dating Jughead Jones?'

You scoff. 'When were you going to mention you're dating Josie McCoy?' You pulled your arm out of his grip. And turned to look at him. He looked confused. 'Yanno Sweet Pea, you were here last week with her? Has your memory gone?'

'I'm not dating her.' He splutters out.

'You know what Sweet Pea; I don't care who you're dating or not dating. It was only a couple of notes between us. So, I'll just go make your shake and you can sit here if you want or leave if you would prefer. And when you come back next week I won't be here.' You leave to make his shake but when you come back, he is not there, but a napkin is in his place.

'Sorry - SP'

-----

A couple of days later you were packing all your bags in the back of a rented pickup truck, ready to take a long road trip back to your hometown with Jughead. When he arrived, you said goodbye to your family and jumped in the passenger’s seat, Jug had agreed to take the first shift.

You made light conversation and sung along to the radio for about 20 minutes before you noticed that Jug was taking a wrong turning.

'You're going the wrong way.'

'Y/N, please don't hate me. He made me do this.'

'Okay Jug, what's going on, you're scaring me.'

'You know you said that Josie and Sweet Pea had been in Pops? Well, it's not what it seems. Just listen to him yeh?'

'Jughead Jones where am I?' He guided you out of the truck and led you down a path into what appeared to be a small forest. 'you better not be murdering me Jones.' You joked. 'I was going to road trip with you and all.' He rolled his eyes and remained silent.

He had led you to a clearing, told you to wait there and then ran off.

'Jones.' you shouted. 'Jones, come back here. Stop messing this isn't funny.'

'Did you know that the inventor of the frisbee was cremated and turned into a frisbee when he died.'

You jumped and turned around, shocked at the new voice in the quiet forest. 'Sweet Pea? What are you doing here?'

'Did you know that 12 bodies were found in Benjamin Franklin’s basement? You wrote that when i was studying for History.' You looked down and saw in his hands a pile of papers. Napkins.

'Here's one of my favourites - Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Enough to break the ice. I'm Y/N. That was one of the first notes you gave me, remember?' You nod. 'Well thing is, it was never 'only a couple of notes' to me. I really like you, or I think I like you from what you've said about yourself in the notes. Just tell me now, did I read it wrong? I know you're leaving, I just wanted you to know.' His voice remained strong throughout, but his eyes did not hold the same confidence.

'What about Josie?'

'What about Jughead?' he retorts but quickly breaks into a smile and shows he was joking. 'Me and Josie aren't a thing. We used to be. I really liked her, but she didn't like me and then last week she came and told me that she suddenly did. But I told her I have a thing for this amazing girl who knows too many pickup lines and facts about dinosaurs.'

'really?'

He cleared his throat and looked down at a piece of paper he pulled out of his pocket. 'do you have a band aid?' you look at him confused. 'because i scraped my knee falling for you.'

You break out in a smile and walk closer to him, reaching out to his hands and then running yours up his arms and resting them on his shoulders 'Maybe let's leave the pickup lines to me. What google search found you that one?'

He pulled you closer and wrapped his other hand around your waist. 'I searched -how to get the pretty, witty, lovely waitress to fall for me-.' You giggled and brought your hand to rest on his cheek. You saw pure adoration in his eyes and hoped he saw the same in yours. You lent in and gently placed your lips on his in a quick and innocent kiss. When you pulled back and opened your eyes, he was smiling the brightest smile.

A question came into your mind as you noticed all the napkins strewn across the floor, you looked up with him through your lashes with your head tilted and asked. 'Did you really keep all my notes?'

'Like I said Princess, they are more than just notes to me.'

You felt complete and knew that in a couple of hours you would be unloading all your stuff again back in Riverdale because there really was something to stay for.

[kurodachimagic]

Chocolate and Cherries - Chapter 1

Summary: When Adachi falls into the arms of a kind stranger his life changes for the better.

Rating: Pg 13

Tags/warnings: Fluff, getting together, au, Writer Adachi, Chef Kurosawa.

Word count: 6.2k

A/n: This story was written for the cherry magic mini bang! Thank you @hiwatari-art for inviting me to join! Had a lovely time working with you as always. Thank you to my other artist over on twitter guacagabs. The entire story is being posted right now. Thank you to @schnaf for being a great friend and beta!

Read on ao3

Adachi dragged his feet on the pavement as he made his way home from work. He was already too exhausted to start his writing day with the best mindset but it would have to do. He’d already skipped four days this week and if he didn’t actually sit down to work on his book, it would never be published. He let out a deep sigh and shook his head slightly.

The situation was not ideal by any means, he was not great at cooking and it was already too late to start dinner, but he definitely needed to eat something or his mind would absolutely quit on him, he knew that much.

Adachi knew he should probably get something healthier but he refused to waste even more time walking to the store, so he decided to stop by the food cart near his flat for his usual emergency menu: two tuna onigiris with mayo - along with a can of soda in the hopes that the caffeine would boost his creativity. He was not too happy about it, but he didn’t have much time to contemplate his choice because as soon as he had paid, the first few droplets of water hit his shoulders. Looking up, he felt the next few drops hit his nose and his forehead. He cursed inwardly and simply took off awkwardly running the last few blocks home, trying his best not to slip and fall, his dress shoes nothing but a hazard in this particular situation.

The building door was so close, he could see it through the pouring rain; just a few meters and he would be home. Adachi rushed, his hand extended already to grab at the door handle when his body collided with something - someone - and fell backwards. It was as if time had slowed down; he could see the face of the person he ran into frozen in shock, his eyes widening as he saw Adachi falling, while Adachi could only think about the pain this would cause him, physical, yes, but mostly emotional. He always managed to get himself in embarrassing situations and now -

His neighbour extended his hand just in time to catch Adachi’s and pulled him upright effortlessly, his expression switching from shock to a relieved smile. “Are you ok? I’m so sorry, I hadn’t seen you.”

“Thank you! I’m so sorry,” Adachi said, feeling the heat rise to his face, partly because of his clumsiness and partly because his neighbour had not let go of him yet. In fact, Adachi could have sworn that the guy was rubbing his thumb on the back of his hand. He didn’t know what to do, so he tried again. “Uh, sorry. I should’ve been more careful.”

“It’s ok, I’m glad that you didn’t get hurt.” The man seemed to suddenly remember they were standing in the pouring rain and pulled Adachi to the door. “Come, you’ll catch a cold in this weather.”

No matter how hard he thought, Adachi couldn't remember ever catching his name but he had seen this man before in the elevator and in some of the common areas. He seemed to be a bit of a recluse, much like himself.

The man opened the door and finally let go of his hand before ushering him in. “After you, Adachi.”

Adachi’s eyes widened; he didn't know how the man knew his name, but he didn’t mention it. He walked inside and called the elevator, followed closely by his saviour. Once the doors opened, he stepped in and turned around, pressing the button for the fifth floor and finally facing the man. "Thank you, again…" he trailed off.

"Kurosawa. My name is Kurosawa." He pressed the fourth-floor button.

Adachi smiled and bowed to him. "It was nice seeing you, Kurosawa. Have a good night."

The elevator dinged and Kurosawa bowed with a smile before exiting. “Good night, Adachi,” he waved.

Adachi hesitantly waved back as the elevator doors closed. Before he knew it he was one floor up, opening the door to his flat, throwing his work bag on the sofa and taking his wet clothes off with a groan before going to the bathroom.

What a day. Not only had he stayed late to finish on that project Urabe had handed to him but he also made himself look like a fool in front of his very cool neighbour, and to add insult to injury now he needed a hot shower to hopefully avoid catching a cold. He shook his head and hopped under the stream, washing himself thoroughly and letting the hot stream relax his muscles.

Feeling in a bit of a better mood, Adachi got out of the shower, wrapped himself in a towel and went about getting into a comfy set of pyjamas. He finally sat at his desk and opened the white doc of doom, checking the time and cursing as he realized it was 9 pm already. He slouched in his chair, throwing his head back with a groan. This book was going to take a million years at this rate, he really needed to prioritize his schedule, put on some good hours into it each day, especially during the weekend, he needed to -

Adachi’s stomach growled loudly, reminding him that his emergency dinner laid abandoned in its bag. He got up and stomped over to the sofa, unwrapping the onigiris and eating them without so much as a thought before returning to his spot. He promptly sat down to continue with the daily task of staring at the document while he begged his brain to type something - anything - out. But his mind had other plans though, Kurosawa’s face and gentle smile kept popping in his mind. Maybe it was because of the way he moved, how he had kept him from falling with his sharp reflexes, or maybe it was how elegant he looked even when he was soaking wet, how well his suit fitted him. Kurosawa was like some sort of superhero, or… no, he was more like a Prince Charming from an epic battle world. That was a start - it was not the murder mystery he had thought about, but it was definitely a start.

The sound of Adachi’s footsteps worked like a metronome, helping his mind settle into a rhythm. He was starting to see things in more detail: The brave prince paced in his castle, his sword close by his side, the problems his kingdom was facing were almost too much to bear and with his father on the brink of death, it was all on him. A shadow appeared above the citadel - the… the… ‘kingdom x’ was being attacked by a three-headed dragon. How would he fix this and save his people? Had someone sent the dragon or did it act with free will? Did the soon-to-be king have secret magic powers? Maybe they were a secret even to himself!

With renewed energy and excitement, Adachi sat down to work. This new world just wanted to be written, to become a reality, and he was not going to stop it. Aided by the occasional sip of soda and a few “stretching breaks” that were more like actual pacing, he managed to draft four thousand words by 5 am, effectively breaking his 3 thousand word record from just a few months ago. If he could keep up the pace he could finish the book within the next month and send it to Tsuge for editing and review. He sent a quick text to his friend to tell him the good news and got into bed; he would probably regret staying up so late tomorrow, but now he didn’t have it in him to care. Writing was definitely his call - even if he was very close to missing his goal of being a published author by 30.

---

The commute to work was nothing short of hell. The morning started with Adachi missing his usual train and having to take the next one during rush hour - not that he ever managed to avoid rush hour, but he usually took the first train during it so it wasn’t as crazy as later in the morning. This resulted in him having a very unpleasant ride, squeezed half to death between the sea of people, feeling like a canned sardine with a bad case of insomnia. That was the other issue, the previous writing night ended up being a success but even though he’d been exhausted by the time he was done, it had been impossible to fall asleep. Now he was on his way to a long workday with a pounding headache and a sour mood. If given the opportunity, Adachi would’ve chosen to take the day off to sleep and feel refreshed enough by sundown to continue writing.

His job was definitely a necessary evil, but sometimes he couldn’t help but resent it. On the verge of thirty, Adachi spent most of his day at the office, writing his reports, Urabe’s reports, and occasionally picking up the slack of some of his colleagues. There was barely any time for hobbies or relaxing and least of all to be an aspiring writer. To be completely honest, Adachi had started viewing his day job as his second career in the past year. His heart and soul were focused on his new goal, what he really wanted. In the end, if writing didn’t become his main income, it wouldn’t matter, he was passionate enough about it to continue no matter what. After all, living in the fantasy worlds he created was more than enough for him.

Adachi made it to his desk just on time, but running those last few blocks only served to make his mood even sourer. He pulled at the collar of his shirt with a small huff, still thinking about his writing and leaned back in his chair until it touched Urabe’s shoulder, startling him.

He turned around swiftly, blush already rising to his cheeks. “I’m so sorry, Senpai.”

Urabe nodded and waved him off. Then, he cocked his head and looked at Adachi in more detail. “What is going on with you, Adachi? You look tired.”

“I just had trouble sleeping last night, that’s all,” Adachi said with a heavy sigh. He could picture so many things he would rather do than give explanations about his personal life, but he would feel too guilty if he was rude to Urabe when he was only worried about him.

“Hmm, are you sure that’s all?”

“Yes. I’m ok.” He attempted his best smile. “Thank you for asking.”

“Adachi,” Urabe pouted, his brows burrowed into a childish frown, just like every time he would ask Adachi to take on more work, any semblance of concern already gone out the window. “Can you finish this report for tomorrow? The boss is really piling stuff on my shoulders and I already had other plans for today.”

Sometimes Adachi wished he was a bad person, or a bad colleague even, but he couldn’t help taking on the extra work when it was needed, after all, he didn’t have much of a life. He rolled his eyes but nodded. “Yes, of course.”

“Oh, wait. Is your birthday today or tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow.”

“And you’re turning 30, right?”

Adachi nodded once again, hoping to end the conversation as soon as possible; he didn’t want to be reminded of the passage of time or how much he hadn’t achieved by now.

Urabe rolled his chair closer and elbowed him. “Aaah, you sly weasel. Do you have a date?”

“Of course not. I’m just looking forward to getting home and sleeping.” That was literally his birthday plan.

Urabe frowned and gave him a quizzical look. “But you have... ‘dated’ before, right?” He winked.

Adachi shook his head slightly and saw the same look many people gave him, a mix of pity and judgement.

“You should ask one of the girls out. I’ve heard Yui is single and she’s very pretty!”

Adachi slowly turned his chair towards the copy machine and saw Yui across the room. She was, in fact, very pretty, but… she didn’t spark anything in him. She looked like a work of art, pleasant to look at, but not for him. “No, I don’t think that would work.”

“Adachi, if you don’t date someone by the time you turn 30, you will turn into a wizard!” He whispered.

“What? That’s ridiculous!”

“It’s true, you’ll see!”

Adachi rolled his eyes and turned back to his desk, finally starting on the reports needed. The sooner he was done with that, the sooner he could return to his writing.

--

The elevator opened its doors for Adachi and the ding that followed made his muscles relax instantly. Only a few more minutes and he would be up in his flat, taking his shoes off and cooking something quick before sitting down to write. He felt inspired by the beginning of this new story and he wasn’t about to let a bad day at work ruin that for him.

Just as the doors started to close, someone put a bag between them to keep them open. The first thing Adachi saw was a girl with a cute and gentle look, a black wispy fringe framing her face and a sweet smile. She nodded at Adachi and he smiled and nodded back. He wondered if he would ever date a girl like her, if sharing his life with a partner and doing things together would be so different than what he did now. The answer was probably not, since he assumed nobody would be supportive of him working all day and writing all night; if he was honest with himself, he didn’t really have time for a relationship, even if he sometimes yearned for a bit of company - theoretically. Adachi blinked repeatedly, suddenly crashing back into reality when he saw the looming presence of Kurosawa behind her, giving him a weird look he couldn’t quite place as he ushered the girl into the elevator.

Out of sheer awkwardness, Adachi nodded and mumbled a quiet hello at him, looking away as a blush crept onto his cheeks. Was that Kurosawa’s girlfriend? He groaned and let his head fall back against the elevator wall. He’d been caught staring at his neighbour’s girlfriend like a creep. He ventured a sideways glance and realized Kurosawa was still looking at him with a weird expression.

Thankfully, the ride was short and only a minute later, Adachi was home, barely paying any attention to his basic needs as per usual. He made some instant ramen and added a bit of egg to it before eating it mindlessly, daydreaming of his new story and the magic system involved.

Perhaps it was quickly becoming a much more ambitious project than he had anticipated but as long as the writing flowed, everything would be ok. What was supposed to be a long writing session soon turned into an early night after Adachi’s brain decided to shut down mid-sentence, putting him to sleep sitting at his desk, his head hanging down and his spine hunched over.

[fyexo]

200815 SuperM on the Message of Forthcoming Album ‘Super One,’ Promotion During COVID

Almost a full year after releasing its debut EP, SuperM is back with a new single, the song “100,” ahead of a studio album, “Super One,” due out Sept. 25. The group, comprised of members Baekhyun, Taemin, and Kai, of seasoned K-pop groups EXO and SHINee, alongside Taeyong, Mark, Ten, and Lucas, of NCT 127 and WayV, was poised to break big in the U.S. market following their first release last October, the song “Jopping,” but the coronavirus pandemic had others plans.

Still, the group has found ways to stay active amidst the shutdowns of shows across the world and was the first band from from its label SM Entertainment to host an online concert for fans, experimenting with AR and engaging with viewers directly. Earlier this month, SuperM revealed a rollout schedule for “Super One,” which launches in earnest today with the release of “100.” Variety connected with the members via Zoom to chat about the group’s dynamic and how the full album came to be.

The SuperM show at the Forum in February was not long before the complete shutdown of live events in the U.S. How have you been passing the time the past several months?

Baekhyun: During this time, I worked on my solo album promotions and also worked on preparing for SuperM’s album. Aside from that, we’ve spent time resting at home and on hobbies. We were able to take this time to learn more about things we’re interested in, while also searching for ways to improve ourselves.

Speaking of solos, your EP “Delight” was a success earlier this year. How does it feel to be working together again after doing activities individually?

Baekhyun: It’s been a long time since we’ve all come together, so honestly, it’s been really fun. Recently we’ve been getting together daily due to our schedules, and I definitely am able to get more energy when we’re together compared to when promoting alone. I find myself being eager to work. We’ve been in a positive headspace.

You were among the first artists to stream a concert during COVID, for V LIVE’s “Beyond Live” series back in April. How was that experience?

Baekhyun: It was our first time doing something like that and to be featured on “Beyond Live,” so we didn’t know if many people would be interested, and we were unsure if we could properly deliver the energy that we’d like to. We had our concerns in the beginning, but they disappeared once it started. We did direct video chats and Q&As with our fans aside from just performing, so it felt more like a true fan event than a typical concert. It had more of a playful energy since we had the ability to engage with the audience directly. I personally really enjoyed it. I think we could build a stronger relationship with our fans if we added these elements to our live concerts in the future as well.

Your first full-length album, “Super One,” is out next month. Promoting your new album during this time is bound to be different from the typical promotion schedule that you are familiar with, but there are still ways to connect with fans using technology, whether that be virtual fan signings, FaceTime chats, etc. What are you looking forward to most with your album release?

Kai: Our plan is to do everything we can with the tools we have available. We want to try everything that’s out there to meet with our fans and we’ll definitely pitch in ideas to our promotions team to come up with a variety of different ideas. We like to create our own content and be involved in the process, so we’re working on ensuring that our fans can see different aspects of SuperM. We worked on this album for a long time and haven’t seen our fans for a long time, and on top of that, since the situation isn’t great right now for connecting in person, we plan on treating all of the tracks like title tracks and promoting them.

The teasers for “Super One” focus on individuality and self-reflection. How did the concepts for your individual teasers come to life?

Kai: The concepts for the teasers came out of important moments of our lives. Mine is rooted in dance and the thoughts I have about working as an artist. I think we were able to share our individuality and also how these individual thoughts come together for “Super One.”

Can you tell us about the message behind “Super One” as a concept for the album?

Baekhyun: The message for this album is based on hope and overcoming hardships together. Each individual teaser shows a struggle that is overcome so we can be happy as artists on stage. The message emphasizes that during difficult times, it’s important to reflect and identify what it is you’re good at and what you’re capable of, rather than dwelling. We came together as SuperM after spending time apart and you’ll notice that all the songs on the album convey a similar message. I think it’s great to be together again.

Kai: I think the biggest difference between promoting within our original groups versus within SuperM is the change in our roles. For me, I am one of the younger members in EXO, but in SuperM, I am suddenly a senior member with more experience. Taemin was also the youngest in his group, and Baekhyun has become a leader. [Laughs]

Baekhyun: [Shrugs] It just happened.

Kai: Taeyong is also the leader in NCT 127, but in SuperM, he is one of the junior members. I think with changes like this, there is a shift in energy. It’s definitely enjoyable to experience different roles while working as SuperM and it’s a fresh atmosphere. It’s also helped us become closer a lot faster.

Mark: We wanted to express how even though we’re all individually talented and have distinct qualities, we can come together as one to create “Super One.” When we’re together, we’re able to overcome hardships. That’s the main message for the album and you’ll see that in all of the tracks, there is that common theme of hope. We hope our fans can receive that positive energy.

For the tracks that we’ve performed but not officially released, our fans probably already know the songs, but it’ll be new for them to hear the studio versions, so I think they’ll definitely look forward to that. I remember the reactions to the new songs were positive when we were touring and they seemed to like them, so I can’t wait for them to hear the actual audio.

Have you given the younger members any advice now that you’re one of the senior members with more experience? Or on the other hand, can the junior members share any memorable advice they’ve received?

Taeyong: To be honest, rather than a piece of advice, the older members say and do a lot of things that help us relax and feel comfortable. For example, if we’re nervous before going on stage, they–

Taemin: “Be nervous”

Kai: We tell them to be even more nervous. Since we have to do well. [Laughs]

Taeyong: This is a good example. They make the mood fun and light while providing us with good energy.

Kai: They always do well, so there’s not much for us to say.

Are there any fun stories from behind the scenes of “Super One” that you can share with us?

Baekhyun: When we filmed “100,” there was a set that was made of optical illusions. I’m not sure if this will appear in the behind-the-scenes video for the music video, but on this set, when you move backward, you become larger, and when you’re in front, you appear really small, like a mini-me. I thought that was really cute and interesting to see. It’s the only time that Kai and I will appear to be the same height. [Laughs]

Is there anything else you’d like to share with your fans and Variety?

Taeyong: We have multiple music videos coming out, so I hope you all look forward to them all. We also hope everyone can continue to take care and keep healthy during these times.

This interview has been translated from Korean and edited for brevity and clarity.

Kristine Kwak @ Variety

[realllllfangirllllll]

Beyond Lovers || Chp. 13

{More Than Friends Sequel}

Chairman!Jaehyun AU x CEO!Reader AU

Summary: You find yourself falling deeper and deeper in love with the former CEO after overcoming your fear of love. Although there were rough patches, both of you are now stronger than ever. However, you realize that maintaining a relationship and a company at the same time can be very difficult, especially if someone is out to destroy the both of you.

Masterlist

{ Previous / Next }

Yuta gave you a death glare as you laughed at his current state. The two of you were in Osaka, surrounded by deers and tourists. You somehow convinced Yuta to feed the deer, but he ended up running the other way in fear as the deer dashed towards him. It’s been roughly two weeks since you came to Japan with Yuta and the more time you spent with him, the more he opened up to you. At first, he was the arrogant cousin and heir to the chairman of YG, but now, he was just Nakamoto Yuta. 

Through this trip, you found out that he was more than just the “bad boy” CEO everyone pegged him for. Indeed, he was moody, but ultimately, he was just a misunderstood guy going through life’s challenges. One evening in Tokyo, while the two of you walked down a rather quiet street, he confessed his deepest secret to you. You were shocked to hear what he had to say, but this made you trust him even more. He tore his walls down and opened up to you. He told you he was actually adopted into the Ahn family because his father died when he was just five years old. 

Looking back, you now realized why he disliked Emily so much. She was always privileged and sheltered her whole life, but Yuta had gone through so many struggles throughout his entire childhood. You resonated with him and felt much closer to him. At first, the two of you promised to help each other due to a shared interest in bringing Emily down, but now, it was much more than that. You both knew the pain of abandonment and loneliness. This was much more than a partnership now.

~~~

“Are you ready?” Yuta looked at you with anticipation as the both of you entered the elevator to the hotel lobby.

You nervously clicked your heels, “Does it look like I’m ready?”

More anxiety builds up in the pit of your stomach as the elevator slowly approached the tenth floor of the building. You sighed out, “How slow can this elevator get?”

Yuta laughed as he rests his hand on your shoulder, “Don’t worry young one, you’ll get over your nerves after your first time.” The elevator came to a stop and Yuta stepped out as the door opened. Winking at you, he said teasingly, “You have to pop your presentation cherry someday.” You rolled your eyes and followed behind him. 

Today was one of your most life-changing moments and the reason you came to Japan in the first place. You and Yuta created a proposal to make sure Emily wouldn’t be able to mess with NCT or your friends anymore. If the presentation goes smoothly with the Japanese investors, your idea would be even stronger when proposed to make it official in South Korea. 

Despite your anxiousness, you were more than ready to show Japan what NCT is made of. You could hear the noises of businessmen chattering as you walked toward the direction of the conference room. You went over the main points of your proposal in your head before the buzz from your phone snapped you out of your thoughts. You quickly glanced at your phone while walking down the hallway. Memories of the terrible day flashed before your eyes as you stared at your phone screen.

My Love 😇💙: I know you’re still mad and you have every right to be mad. Maybe I’m just selfish but please do me this one favor. Come back and meet me at the gardens. I want to make things right.

You tried your best to ignore his text, but as your hand went to turn the doorknob to the conference room, your phone buzzed again. A pang of guilt struck you.

My Love 😇💙: I won’t hurt you, I promise.

You never meant to make him feel that way. Truth be told, you know he didn’t mean it. After all, he never hit you. It was a spur of the moment that had you both traumatized. 

His last text endlessly replayed on your mind. Even as you walked into the conference room and Yuta cued for you to start, all you could think of was how Jaehyun must have felt.

Yuta cleared his throat abnormally loud and spoke in Japanese, “Thank you for taking time out of your busy schedules for this abrupt meeting. I am Yuta, current CEO of SM, and this is y/n, CEO of NCT.”

You received a strong, but subtle, tap on your back from Yuta and you snapped out of your thoughts. Trying your best to push Jaehyun out of your mind, you spoke into the mic attached to the podium in English, “Today we are here to introduce to you all the future of NCT.” You clapped your hands and the lights in the room turned off. Everyone’s attention shifted to the projecting screen as you smoothly went over the key points of the proposal. 

When the lights were turned on again, you turned your attention towards the investors. With a bright smile you concluded in Japanese that Yuta has taught you beforehand, “We would love for you to partake in this history-making event. Thank you for your time.” 

The room was silent for a second, your nerves were starting to settle in again, but the investors exchanged approving glances and applauded. You and Yuta bowed and exchanged satisfied expressions before he asked the investors, “Are there any questions about today’s proposal?”

A few hands shot up and Yuta strategically answered every one. Your mind quickly drifted back to Jaehyun’s previous text as Yuta occupied the curious investors. He was wrapping up the questions and you were prepared to end the meeting before a hand shot up from the very back of the room. A familiar voice spoke in English, “What are we waiting for? Let’s start now.”

~~~

By now the investors have left the conference room and are heading back to their offices. You told Yuta to wait for you in the car while you clean up and he willingly complied. You flashed a tight smile to the man walking towards you, still shocked by his previous, confident statement before ending the meeting. “Long time no see Nana.”

Jaemin sent you a warm smile and pulled you down to sit on one of the conference chairs, “Ditto.”

You stared at him as he sat next to you, stunned that he was here in Japan and at this meeting. You slightly nudged him, and said with a small smirk on your face, “You look different.”

He laughed and ran his hand through his gelled hair. With a dramatic pose, he said in a husky voice, “Do I look sexy?”

You rolled your eyes, playfully hitting him on the arm. “I haven’t heard from you since I left to Paris.”

He chuckled lightly while rubbing the back of his neck, “Yeah… Well, you didn’t exactly respond back after the charity ball incident…”

Your eyes widened as guilt took over you, “I’m so sorry Nana! I never got back to you! Everything was so hectic and my phone just blew up and-”

You felt Jaemin place his hands on your shoulders and he chuckled, “It’s ok y/n. Calm down, take a deep breath. I know your mind has been running like crazy after all that’s been happening. I get it.” He took one hand off your shoulder and ruffled your hair, “Stop panicking, you look too cute.”

You gave him a playful glare as the two of you continued to catch up. “So… Are you officially working as Starship’s heir now? Thanks for telling me by the way.”

Jaemin sighed and replied, “I kept that away from you because you were one of the few people who treated me for me. A lot of girls used me for my status and I didn’t want that from you.”

Faking an offended reaction, you told him dramatically, “You thought I would do that? Na Jaemin, I am hugely disappointed in you!”

He rolled his eyes, “Anyways, I have been working for my father now, but we’re not particularly close. I’m just trying to make my mom happy by dealing with ignorant businessmen and annoying heirs, aka Princesses like Emily Ahn. Hence my appearance here in Japan,” he quickly changed the topic, “So, how’s life treating you Miss CEO? Jaehyun treating you right?”

As soon as you heard him mention Jaehyun your gaze lowered to the floor. You tried your best to be vague as you told him, “Being CEO is pretty hectic. I got a lot of work to do, as you can see. I’m just trying my best to make NCT a success and my friends happy.”

Jaemin gave you a skeptical look as you avoided his stare, “Are you not telling me something y/n? Why are you avoiding my last question?”

You mumbled a quick “It’s nothing,” before Jaemin waved his hands in front of your face, “Hello? Earth to y/n?” He then gave you his signature “nagging” look and said sternly, “You better spill princess.” 

Sighing you asked him, “You won’t let me go unless I tell you huh?”

He gave you a curt nod as he loosened the tie around his neck, “I got all day y/n.” 

And so, you began telling him everything from Paris until now, in this very conference room. You let out a sigh as Jaemin looked at you blankly. “So you’re now all caught up with my life.” 

He looked at your small figure, sighing from the recent events that you laid out on him. It was silent for a good ten minutes before he chuckled, “You know, it’s not my first time seeing Jaehyun like that. He’s the beast and you’re the beauty.”

You gave him a questioning look and Jaemin continued, “From what I know, he’s angry because he cares. Take me for example, he almost sent me to the hospital just because we shared the same blanket in the freezing cold living room.” You gave him an apologetic look as he brought up the time Jaehyun barged into your apartment. He continued telling you, “And during the charity ball, he would’ve lost his composure and beat up a reporter if I haven’t held him back.” 

He laughed as your eyes widened in shock. “Na Jaemin! What do you mean he almost beat up a reporter!”

“See, this is what I’m trying to tell you.”

You asked him furiously due to frustration, “What are you trying to tell me?! Now you’re just making me think my boyfriend has violence issues!” 

With his arm propped up on the table, he sighed and facepalmed, “Why are you always so clueless about these things…” He then muttered, “Now I know why you didn’t even realize my crush on you.” 

You leaned closer and asked, “What did you say? I couldn’t hear the last bit.”

Jaemin immediately sat up straight and dismissed his previous words, “Nothing! Anyways, my point is Jaehyun gets worked up every time you’re in danger or is threatened in any way. It’s probably killing him that he almost hit you, keyword almost. You even said it yourself, he’s your boyfriend. You saying that out loud confirms that you still have feelings for him,” sighing, he looked at you, “the rest is up to you to decide.” 

You were dazed, feeling guiltier as his words settled in. He suddenly placed his hands on top of yours. As if he read your mind, he told you gently, “Don’t feel guilty because it’s not your fault. Go with what your heart tells you. If you feel like he doesn’t love you, leave him. But if you still have that lingering feeling, go meet with him and talk it out.” 

For a moment, the two of you stayed like that. You tried to consider Jaemin’s words and Jaemin stayed beside you, letting you think. You placed your free hand on top of his and said softly, “I think I know how I feel now. Thank you Nana, for always telling me the things I can’t see.”

He gave you a warm smile and leaned forward, placing a soft kiss on your cheek. “I’m always here for you y/n. Just call me and I’ll be there.”

———

• Surprise! The one and only Heir!Na Jaemin has arrived in the sequel~ •

• Any Team Jaemin out here reading this chp 👀 •

• STREAM MOONWALK 🌘 •

[cirrus-lily]

my first listen of resonance pt. 1!

i wanted to start doing these since i’m very interested in music and stuff and i wanna learn how to properly express musical things etc. etc. so yea!! feel free to ignore and these are just my opinions, so pls don’t come @ me thanks :)

track 1: make a wish (birthday song) - nct u (ft. taeyong, doyoung, jaehyun, lucas, xiaojun, jaemin, shotaro)

i actually really liked this, if we’re talking purely about the music (the mv is another thing....i won’t talk about that). the music was interesting all the way through and was full of unexpected twists. all the members did so well!!! but the members that really stood out to me in the mv and also just listening to the song were jaemin and xiaojun! they did so well and they nailed their parts so well!!! there’s just something very satisfying about jaemin’s rap in this song, and all of xiaojun’s parts suited him really well and it was nice to see him sing in a style that was different to the typical wayv style. also rapper jaehyun!!! his parts suited him so well and i’m so happy we got to see him do a rap-esque part hehe :) the only part i probably didn’t like was the part where there was that time-warp effect before the final chorus like that felt so out of place ... why is it there?? also where’s shotaro tho?? like i didn’t even hear him,,, if you’re gonna add a new member at least use him sm :/ | okay so i just watched the line distribution and jaemin has so little lines :((( shotaro doesn’t have many solo parts but has a lot of adlibs and honestly? good for him!! it’s really good for a debut!! doyong and lucas should’ve had more lines too :/ anyways overall i really love this song and i’m so excited to see the stages!!!

track 2: misfit - nct u (ft. johnny, taeyong, mark, hendery, jeno, yangyang, sungchan)

this is legit my favourite song so far it’s incredible!! when the song started i just started full-on vibing!! this song is so fun and has so much energy and i had no expectations at first but the track video blew me away, which made me so excited to hear the full song, and it did not disappoint :) everyone in this song SLAYED. i have nothing else to say except that because the raps were fire and each member pulled their verse off so well it continued to make me smile line after line after line. for sungchan’s debut, it was incredible to hear him spit fire like that and i am so excited to see how he grows as a rapper if he’s already this good at debut oh gosh. but my favourite part has to be mark’s second verse where the music cuts out and he keeps going and his rhythm actually speeds up once the music cuts. that blew my mind in the track video and still has the same effect on me listening to it again. the genius of cutting out the music is incredible and it adds so much not just to the rap but to the song overall. my only complaint for this song is that johnny got like...4 lines. cmon sm please give him lines he’s more than just a visual!! overall this song is something i really enjoyed and something that the members pulled off so well even though it’s so different and unexpected from nct :)

track 3: volcano - nct u (ft. taeyong, doyoung, jaehyun, winwin, jungwoo, lucas, mark) (aka nct 2018 boss unit)

what is going on in this song......at the beginning it gave me similar vibes to limitless but as i listened to more of the song, it kinda fell apart for me ;-; like the vocal parts were really good (jaehyun high note!!) and the rap parts were really good but they didn’t flow together as well as they should have, and it ended up feeling as if i was listening to the rap of one song and the vocals of another song :/ also where are sicheng’s parts?? i thought i just didn’t hear him but when i went to check all he has is like...2-3 adlibs?? why is he even in the song then it doesn’t even have choreo?? feels like boss all over again rip sicheng :’( 

track 4: light bulb - nct u (ft. taeyong, kun, doyoung, and sungchan)

wow this song...i was very fascinated by the member lineup at first, and then i heard the song and it all makes sense :) everything melds so well together, with ty and sungchan’s rapping pairing perfectly with kun and dy’s vocals, and there are kinda ‘pairs’? like ty and dy and sungchan and kun,, and their voices compliment each other so well aaaaaaa. the only part i felt weird about was the start when ty was rapping over the piano...the rhythm clashed a little but as the song went on it resolved itself thankfully. the vibes reminded me of yestoday and it’s a very different mood from the first 3 songs on the album so i’m kinda confused as to why they’ve put it as track 4 but oh well. sungchan showcased a different side of his rapping here and he’s really beginning to show himself as a very well rounded rapper so i’m actually super impressed but as expected from nct :) my favourite thing about this song has to be kun’s vocals tho. the first time you hear him in the song is when he harmonises with doyong and i tell you the way i Lost It. and every time he sang as sungchan rapped it blew my mind. and doyong and kun’s harmonies,,,, chef’s kiss. can you tell i really love this song aaaaaa okay end of ramble. i think overall i just really appreciate the change in pace of the album since the first 3 were very hype lol.

track 5: dancing in the rain - nct u (ft. taeil, johnny, yuta, kun, jaehyun, jungwoo, xiaojun, chenle)

ok this song blew my mind 🤯 firstly, can we talk about jaehyun and johnny rapping??????? i’m so happy that we got to hear them rap!! it was so beautiful :’) secondly, vocal kings!!! chenle high note!!  their voices sound so beautiful together and i’m so happy we got that in this song!! the vibes are also so pretty?? like a lofi jazzy vibe and honestly it feels like singin’ in the rain modern version and i am living :) the only minor issue i have is that because there are so many vocalists in the unit, some of them had really few lines :/ but i think they needed more people to create that effect in the chorus of a lot of people harmonising together, so we gain some we lose some i guess,, but wow i love this song so much can someone write a fic or make an mv based on this song pleaseeeeeeee i would love to see it :’) p.s. i listened to this song twice once on spotify and once on colour-coded lyrics (just to see who sang what) and the more i listen to it the more i love this song aaaaaaaaaa :)

track 6: interlude: past to present

ok this was interesting...i was so confused about the first part cos i couldn’t make sense of what was being narrated, but the second part is another story,,, it’s chock full of references - like there’s that one sound (idk how to describe it) but it’s in both the awaken the world interlude and the neo zone interlude, and the part after that is reminiscent of the punch intro thing...which is why it’s so interesting,,, would the theorists like to have a go? but honestly it was very interesting musically and very nct lmao...i have nothing left to say lol that’s it.

track 7: déjà vu - nct dream (OT7)

wow the vibes on this song are so fun!! this song really suits dream and i think it’s a fitting return for ot7 :) it’s got the playfulness of we go up with a bit more maturity which is very representative of dream’s current phase where they’re growing up but they’re still kids hehe :) i will complain about the line distribution again except everyone’s probably sick of hearing about it lol...but mark has a lot of lines and jeno and jaemin don’t sigh. the line distribution for the vocalists was really quite fair tho :) also renjun bridge!!!! it was so good!!! and haechan intro!!!! wow i love this song so much heh but my favourite part has to be the bgm,, like the dang dang sound that was in the bgm for the entire track really helps to push the song forward and adds a spring to the song that really makes it more playful and fun!! i’m super impressed by this as well since the track video didn’t make me that excited but now i really like it so i think this song was so fun :)

track 8: nectar - wayv (OT7)

let’s formally welcome nectar to the list of nct’s hoe anthems 😌 okay but that aside, i quite liked the song!! the intro was weird but once you get into the song it’s pretty okay!! it’s also slightly different from the wayv sound we’re used to but the members pulled it off well!! i love the bgm too hehe :) ten and sicheng!! i can finally hear them!! and it was so nice to hear them both sing aaaa. also wayv’s vocal line continue to astonish me...that’s the highest i’ve heard kun and dejun sing and it sound so good!!! the rap was fire too and lucas, yangyang and hendery have done it again, they sound so swag which really fits the vibe of the song!! i also love how most of the song is pretty low and starts pretty low but the vocals are such a complete contrast cos they’re so high and that really adds to the song!! i’m so wayv biased but i genuinely really do like this song and ‘gimme that nectar’ will be stuck in my head for the next 24 hours :/

track 9: music, dance - nct 127 (OT9)

this track is so hype 😳 and i enjoyed that so much!! what stood out to me more than anything else in this song was the bgm, and i love how they cut the music, yell “drop that beat!” and then the beat actually drops 🤯 also the bridge,,, a masterpiece...i thought we were gonna get a solid high note and the airy high note comes from nowhere and suddenly i’m so stunned 😳 also this album really is the return of rapper jaehyun huh :) it’s so nice to hear him rap again :) and this song is really satisfying in so many ways, like the rhythm is really good and the bass hits deep and the dance break music thing was so well timed and so well produced and oooooooh i like this track more than i expected :)) oh and ‘music, dance’ will be stuck in my head for the next 24 hours with ‘gimme that nectar’ :/

track 10: faded in my last song - nct u (ft. taeil, johnny, yuta, ten, lucas, renjun, haechan, jisung)

the way i was trying not to SCREAM throughout this song :’) IT’S SO BEAUTIFUL AAAAAA i mean it in the best way possible when i say this could be an ost it’s so beautiful :’) the VOCALS i nearly lost it when ten sang the pre chorus then nearly lost it when renjun sang the second pre chorus and then almost completely lost it during the bridge (especially cos haechan and taeil) holy moly that was a journey :’) also johnny and yuta’s rap style and lucas’ lower tone really fit so well with the song, like it didn’t take away from the sad vibes of the song but it added to the mellowness of the overall song. and can we just take a moment to talk about park jisung’s rap??? it was so short but he nailed it!!!! this entire song was a masterpiece because all their voices fit perfectly together and complement each other so well it just makes this song shine in a different way??? i have so many things that i wanna say about this song but i’m internally screaming so i’m basically incoherent lol. one thing i will say though is the bgm is so pretty and the piano is so nice :’) (also p.s. idk why but this song lowkey gives me got7 vibes but in the best way possible)

track 11: from home - nct u (ft. taeil, yuta, kun, doyoung, renjun, haechan, chenle)

i’m crying........i’m actually crying.....can they not come for me like this..........this song is so beautiful o m g :”) hearing them sing in their native languages about home is so moving?? like it hits a spot and suddenly my eyes are sweating :”) and the way that the transition from one language to another is so smooth and seamless?? like renjun and chenle are singing in chinese and suddenly yuta pops in with a line of japanese and i completely lost it lmaoooooo. and the way they all come together in the bridge is so beautiful, and taeil’s high note after!!!! and the bgm of this song suited it so well, it allowed you to focus on the vocals and still adds to the overall mood and atmosphere of the song, plus at the start it’s a bit muffled out as if it’s being played on an old record and then it becomes unmuffled and the sound is so bright :) and the way that this song sounds a little bittersweet?? i swear when the mv comes out and when i read the translations i will cry even more i’m not even ready and we still have a week to go. this was the song i was looking forward to most and honestly? it didn’t disappoint at all :)

track 12: from home | korean version - nct u (ft. taeil, yuta, kun, doyoung, renjun, haechan, chenle)

it’s just as beautiful, but with less tears lol :) there isn’t really much to say, it still flows just as well in korean as it did in 3 languages, so i think sm just wanted there to be a version that was completely in korean since nct are a korean group lol.

track 13: make a wish (birthday song) | english version - nct u (ft. taeyong, doyoung, jaehyun, lucas, xiaojun, jaemin, shotaro)

well this is interesting....the english version of the song sounds a bit like a hoe anthem (only a bit!!!) so i’m curious about the lyrics to the korean version o_O also i find it a little strange how they say ‘i can do this all day’ in the korean version but say ‘i can do this all night’ in the english version,,, like what’s the difference?? i literally don’t know why they did that but oh well :) still a great song hehe :)

overall, it’s a really interesting album!! it’s a little different from what i expected, but i still really love it!! i think the songs will grow onto me more as i listen to the album more, so yea :))

[wexhappyxfew]

Hello my bean 💛 I've got two intriguing questions for you today: 1) WHY you started writing? and 2) if you have to give another ending to Sunshine Soldier... what would you do? What other choices would you make? If you have to choose another love story, who would you choose for her?

AH LINDA! THE BEAT IS HERE!!! <3 and thank you so much for the ask AH IM EXCITED - and of course ~ happy trivia tuesday!!! :) 

WHY I started writing? 

So, I actually answered this question (sorta, kinda) to Jamie! But I can gladly do it again because there are many reasons why I decided to start writing. 

For me, writing has always just been a way where I feel I can really express myself for who I am. There’s other ways people express themselves, but for me I feel I really can express who I am through writing and simply just be myself in the writing. As someone who is naturally shy and quiet and doesn’t speak up much - just because I’m like that :) - speaking, or anything involving speaking - has never been a way to express myself - maybe just laughing at someones joke usually LOL but yeah, speaking is definitely not how I would normally express myself.

So discovering writing - writing what I want - was something where I could wholeheartedly just be myself - and I felt so lucky to have discovered writing like this. I can write what I want, make the characters I want, create a story or an entire universe that I want - and no one can change that. You’re your own author, and you create EVERYTHING. Even with simply a model - you are still the author creating this world, this story, a story you want. And that’s something I’ve always viewed as a writer as loving. Just creating a world that is not the sometimes chaotic world we live in, creating these characters that become like your own children, creating plot lines, doing research, being simply productive are just some of the things I have found to really love about writing. 

I have seen it help me in my school writing as well, for various reasons and for how I approach difficult tasks. Writing truly has just helped shaped me as a person I feel, where I know I don’t even need to say a word and I can go and put simply words on a page and create ART! Where I can go and create a work of art that people read and are fascinated by - that’s what I also love, as an artist myself. You are creating a work of art with words on a page - stringing words together into sentences and creating a possibly completely different universe in the manner of black and white words on a page. I just have always found that completely and utterly fascinating as a child who was a book lover and still is! 

Writing is such an art and my mom always says how so many people struggle with it and she always says the fact I am able to write like I do and such, just is such a gift for people. And I hope all of you out there know that. You hold such a gift - each and everyone of you - writer, reader, observer - you all hold a special gift. Whether it be writing, reading, dancing, singing, instrumental, cooking, handy-work, teaching, helping - ANYTHING - we all have gifts and for me writing has felt like such a gift and that’s just one of the reasons I have loved it as much as I have. Hold those gifts close - always!! <3

if you have to give another ending to Sunshine Soldier... what would you do? What other choices would you make? If you have to choose another love story, who would you choose for her?

OOOOOH! This is genuinely such an interesting and fascinating question because there actually was a different ending for Sunshine Soldier! A VERY DIFFERENT ENDING! 

When I first made Sunshine Soldier, I was just writing and going off the 10 episodes just for the fun of it, playing around, seeing where characters fit, basic things like that - with no real thought - just writing! A

And at some point or another, there were 3 other options that Charlotte ALMOST ended up with - before finding that Ronald Speirs was the PERFECT FIT for her!

There was Eugene Roe, Joe Liebgott and Skinny Sisk - but we eventually see that these are very much platonic relationships. 

Eugene Roe was initially the first decision, but I decided after a while, that they work VERY WELL together as simply medic partners, and sorta like platonic soulmates! They read each other well and they understand each other as well, in very important ways - such as difficult topics - like emotion, sadness, grief - things like that. But they worked better platonically - and are one of my favorite platonic relationships of the book!

Joe Liebgott was considered for a fleeting moment until I recognized the two were probably maybe a lil chaotic together and I went against it LOL. It was maybe for a solid week where I considered it, but they worked better, as well, platonically - the brother and sister sort of connection that I loved writing. Joe was really the first to see that vulnerable side of Charlotte, so I felt having them platonically connected - JUST LIKE THE REST OF THE GUYS HONESTLY - was a perfect fit. And by the end of the story I was like how did i ever put these two romantically together?? they’re just much better as individuals and platonic. But then I finally did get my Joe Liebgott relationship in The Soldier of Stars so it was ok - LOL. I always wanted to write a relationship for him!!

And Skinny Sisk - my favorite underrated boy actually - was who made it to almost being romantically linked to Charlotte - but I figured they were better platonically in the end, for me at least. Even though they had many major connections - putting them together platonically was for the better since I feel Charlotte had chemistry with Ronald Speirs more than anyone. But Skinny was definitely up there in the running, but eventually he became more of that brother figure - especially after he was evacuated in Bastogne - we see Charlotte really break seeing a figure like him leave. And plus him and Charlotte were close in age, so they sorta just clicked as like a best friend pair. But they had too much similar energy for me, for them to work! BUT I STILL LOVE THEM <3

But the love story was the only REAL change - everything else was basically the same for me! Just a different love interest, but in the end Ronald Speirs was the perfect choice for Charlotte simply because - ever since they met back in Toccoa on OP duty, there was sorta that instant chemistry of the no-judgement zone and this click if that makes sense! Charlotte and Speirs was definitely what I always wanted in the end of it all - and I couldn’t have been happier with the outcome of Sunshine Soldier. Plus her and Speirs are the cutest beebs so, I just had to.

AND ANOTHER THING WITH THEM...I was very much about making them individuals together before the REAL romance part started. By setting them int here invidiually with goals and power and motivation for themselves, they were able to work later in the story, simply because they were established - the relationship between the two was not the main plot - the main plot was the fact Charlotte became one of the best medics of Easy, sort of like the light of Easy or the sunshine of Easy Company - the relationship was always that sort of sub-plot to the end of it all, that little extra zest to keep everyone on the edge of their seats LOL <3

thank u sm for the ask linda!! I LOVED THESE QUESTIONS SM!!! TRULY!!! thank you again for these - stay lovely and of course hydrated!! <3

[iheardarumorxxx]

Midnight Sun, Chapter 7 - Melody

Surprise bonus chapter tonight. Normally I do two a day, but I had extra coffee today so I’m ready to go, let’s recap this trash.

Aaaaand we start with Weirdo brooding in the car and sniffing up all the Bella smell in it. Thanks, I hate it. 

And do you wanna know what our favorite little Pire is brooding about in the car while he waits for his siblings to finish up their last class of the day? He’s sitting in the car, wondering if Bella thinks he’s pretty. I wish I was kidding, but no, this man is literally sitting there, wondering if Bella is attracted to him because when she is around him her heart rate and breathing picks up and she blushes. Oh, but rest assured, Bella would never have the same impure thoughts that Gross Jessica Stanley had about Edward. 

Leave Jessica alone.

Also, Eddie? Bullshit. As someone who lived in your girlfriend’s head for 4 books, I can absolutely tell you that she has all kinds of impure thoughts about your marble adonis self, and she should probably be confessing to a priest because of them. 

Anyway, Eddie thinks some impure thoughts of his own (yay double standards) and gets a boner in the car. He gets very flowery and harlequinn with his little fantasy about Bella, to the point where, had this not been SM’s writing, I would have not been surprised to read the phrase ‘heaving bosom’. It’s G rated sex at its finest, guys. Be grateful that you didn’t have to read it (unless you did, in which case, I applaud you.)

I had no memories of another kind of yearning.

Just say ‘I never got a boner before Bella’ and be done with it, Eddie. Also now is the time to make your 109 year old virgin jokes, if you’re so inclined. I personally believe that it is perfectly fine if Eddie never felt sexual attraction before Bella, nor would it be a problem if he never felt sexual attraction at all. Ace people do exist. What bothers me is that this is framed in a way that is basically saying ‘You’ll feel the wiggles down there when the right person comes along’ and absolutely ignores the fact that sometimes, people never feel those kinds of attractions. Also, if you do feel those kinds of attractions but its not toward your pure and true love, you’re gross and awful like Gross Jessica Stanley.

The rest of the Cullen brood show up, and of course because Bella is so Special and Wonderful, even Jas and Emmett think she smells delicious, though, not nearly as delicious as Ed does because he’s the Most Special Cullen. Rose is mad and Alice just does as she was instructed to do by her magic future sight. Eddie is put out that he can’t spy on his lady love through her thoughts when they get to her place because he can’t stand not knowing where she is and what she’s doing at all times.

The Cullens go home and start doing various boring things. Chess, computer, TV. Rose is still pissed about the Bella thing and honestly? She has ever right to be. This puts her in danger, her and her family. It puts her husband in danger. She has every right to be mad and SM trying to frame her as bitchy and over-reacting does nothing to make me think that she is.

And Eddie. Oh Eddie. He’s playing the piano. We all know that he’s writing that stupid lullaby for Bella, and Esme is just so happy that her sweet precious baby is playing music again that she has to immediately appear and start fawning over him. Listen, I think that playing piano is a very impressive skill. It takes talent to learn and master. But treating Eddie’s little song like the next mozart piece is just stupid and I hate how everything they do is just consider the BEST THING EVER.

Alice singing along just. Boo. Go away. This was already bad enough as it was, don’t make it worse.

You are the best and the brightest of us all.

Just come out and fucking say it Esme. Or rather, just come out and fucking say it SM. It’s obvious that SM thinks her little avatars are the best and most special things to ever exist. She genuinely thinks that she’s created something to parallel the greatest lit of all time, and that her Eddie is akin to Mr. Darcy. Edward Cullen is not a good character. And he is not an interesting character. And that’s that.

God, there is an entire little section here just shitting on Rosalie. Rosalie is vain and petty. She only cares about her looks. Her whole life she was only looked at because she was pretty and it made her shallow and care only about appearance. Etc etc. Ignore the fact that Rosalie is clearly smart enough to maintain a 4.0 with the rest of her siblings, that she is skill with cars, that she does, in fact, have interests and hobbies outside of traditionally fem ones. She’s just a dumb, vain, shallow girl.

Fuck you, Eddie.

I am of the firm belief that one should never force their own beliefs on others. Never be afraid to express what you believe in, but never tell someone else they’re wrong because their beliefs are different. There are a few exceptions. One is Trump. That man is a danger and needs to be stopped. Period full stop. The other one? Alice mentions that their normal vamp friends are coming and they hunt the normal way. The Cullens have no problem with this and, in fact, just let them hunt nearby. In BD they actually loan out cars to the vamps to help them get away to hunt. The Cullens don’t eat humans, great, but they sure do aide and abet their friends that do. Murder is fucking wrong, even if to these stupid Pires, it is just a lifestyle choice.

Eddie and Emmett are hunting, some real bro bonding time. I wish that was what it was, honestly. I am aware that the Cullens are not actually related, but the have been together for a long time, and clearly have a family dynamic in place. It sure would be nice to see them attempting to act like siblings. To talk to one another, to bond, anything. But that would take time away from Eddie obsessing over his one twu wuv, Bella, so. Can’t have that.

You know what, Emmett is genuinely trying to be nice and understanding to Eddie’s pain and worry. Its actually really sweet to see it. Of course, Eddie is a grade A dick, and does not care about the effort his brother is putting in for him.

 God, and Eddie is crawling into Bella’s window again. I really, really hate that, you know. Like, it’s one thing for the fucker to be obsessive and stalk her when she’s awake, but like... let her sleep dude. Just because you never have to sleep ever doesn’t mean you get to do whatever you want when other people are sleeping. Also, what was your plan gonna be if Bella had insomnia, or if she woke up for some reason in the night and you were just there? Of course, she would never catch you, for you are so wise and brilliant and shit. But like. Dude. Seriously.

So after he spends a few hours staring at Bella while she sleeps, he’s off, and goes out into the woods to follow her scent trail. Bella always compared Mike to a dog, but... idk Mike never pulled that shit. He just really feels the need to tell us that he wants to know literally everything that Bella does ever. It’s weird and creepy, dude. Just chill out. 

And this chapter just kinda... fizzles out. Like, it doesn’t conclude so much as it just... ends. Kind of abruptly. And this chapter was just... boring. Like, the ones before this were bad, but they were at least bad with some flavor. This chapter was like a stale triscut. 

Hope you enjoyed! As always, drop me a message or a DM if you wanna chat about this book or recommend one for my next recap series. You can buy me a snack using the CashApp tag in my bio! Love you all, thanks for reading!

[pentragons]

i hope this question isn't too personal but you seem like a very organized and balanced person and i wanted to ask you how you stay so focused in your studies instead of getting distracted to make something (unless you're studying design?) or by social media? i tend to get distracted super easily and want to do other things that i love or get distracted by sm and am really seeking advice. anyways hope your exams go well and your road trip is wonderful

Oh, anon, that is such a sweet question to ask, I feel really flattered!! But I am so sorry to hear you are struggling!! Please remember that whatever peoples lives may look like on the internet is not what their real life might be like, so please don’t put any pressure on yourself because of how others appear online! First of all: I am not studying design - I am studying for a teachers degree, which takes about 7 years in Germany at the highest level possible (which I am doing) :) I also work two jobs I really enjoy, one of them is at Uni as an assistant to a professor! So Photoshop is purely a hobby to me. But I think it’s funny you are calling me balanced and organized when both are traits I have struggled with (and still do!) a lot myself. A few years ago, around the time I did my A levels, I started to realize that something wasn’t right and that I wasn’t feeling well. At all. I passed my A levels (with very bad grades), went abroad (felt very lonely and sad most of the time), started university (barely able to wake up in the morning to go there) - all while being unable to do the bare minimum. I was struggling so hard, I was constantly sad, unfocused, unorganized and angry. I found out a few months later that I was struggling with severe depression and that I basically had to learn a lot about myself before I could be productive. Or even function. But to me personally, there are some things I learned that help me now. And becoming a teacher (and an adult tbh :D) requires you to be organized and to have an idea of what you are doing, so if I wanted to be good at what I am doing, I had to find ways of being as organized as I can be without losing myself in stress and anxiety. Here goes:

Try to fit small things like scrolling social media, Tumblr, watching YT, playing games on your phone, … into your schedule. I allow myself to do all of that - but it needs to fit somewhere into all the things I actually have to do. Use distractions as consciously as possible. I read on my daily train ride to Uni, check my phone in the 10 minutes I arrive early before class or scroll through social media after I’m done at Uni as a break. I try not to do it INSTEAD of something else, but rather before I do something, after I’m finished doing something or if I need a break. It’s almost like a reward and that’s a pretty cool thing if you ask me :) 

Try to force yourself to be productive by staying at uni/school to study. If I really need to do something, I go to my universities library, sit down in a row full of people and just get to work because honestly? I always feel like I would expose myself I started watching YouTube videos when everyone around me is working. In truth, no one cares but it is so motivating to see everyone around you (seemingly) working and studying! It also puts pressure on you to get your shit done because as I said, you don’t want to be the only lazy one!!

BUT always remember: you do NOT have to feel bad for the things you love, they are not a waste of your time!! If you enjoy making stuff in Photoshop? Go for it! A hobby, no matter what it might be or what others may think of it, is never ever a waste of time. You are doing something purely for yourself and that’s beautiful, you should always keep doing it. Don’t create false pressure by seeing the fault in something you enjoy. It’s rather how you do it, especially when, that matters. I use Photoshop to express my creativity, but I only try to open it when I actually have a good idea instead of aimlessly trying things. That way, I don’t spend too much time using it and when I do, most of the time it’s really rewarding because I actually end up with a finished edit :) It’s also completely different from everything else I am doing, so I love it as an escape I need, to feel happy and relaxed. 

Try to get to know yourself and how you work, it makes studying and working as effective as can be. Try out different methods of studying, different settings, find how you take notes, etc. I realized that I study best by attending all lectures, writing my own notes and then putting them on flashcards as early as possible. And you know what? It saves me a lot of time to read, to photoshop, to do whatever. Because I figured myself out and know how my brain works best. We often create unnecessary stress by trying to be productive but actually not having any idea on what works best for us. It takes some time (and some bad grades because I had nooo idea what I was doing) but YOU know how to handle yourself best. 

Do not feel bad if you were unable to do something because you were focusing on yourself. I realized that whenever I force myself to do something although I feel like crap, it only ends up making everything worse. Take time off if you need to, your mental health comes first! Sometimes I skip Uni and just spend my day in Photoshop or buried in a book. It may be a „waste of time“ to others but I am sure as hell not going to waste my wellbeing on falsely created standards. Everyone likes to lazy around and just have some time to themselves. Allow yourself to scroll social media for a whole day - you’ll realize quickly enough that you are ready to be productive again (๑￫‿￩๑)

I try to manage my priorities instead of my time. Instead of putting myself under time pressure, I always organize the things I need to do on a to-do list. I bought a very useful planner in which I do daily/weekly to-do lists. On Sundays, I try to think of anything I’ll need to do the upcoming week. During the week, I’ll add more things to the list. I always try to start early with whatever it is I have to do - for example, if I know I need to hand in something on a certain date, I start 2 weeks prior so I can do it at my own pace. That way, I can easily shift around my priorities according to how I feel/how lazy I am/spontaneous plans/etc. without having a bad conscience. And the best part? Crossing things off your list. SO SATISFYING. 

I don’t do this myself, but honestly, if nothing is helping use apps or websites that block your access to sites such as Instagram, tumblr or whatever else is taking your focus away. This is a really helpful list of apps and sites to use!

I highly recommend listening to Don’t Stop Me Now by Queen before anything you need to get done. Need to study? Listen to it. Walking into an exam? Listen to it. Just need to be productive and focus? Listen to it. Made me feel invincible and capable so many times! :D I am sorry this got so long, I am not sure if any of this is useful as it is what works for me. If none of it is helpful please remember that as I said, it’s a lot about getting to know yourself and finding out what works for you. Don’t feel frustrated if it takes some time to figure yourself out, working on yourself is something you can always be proud of! And always remember: no matter how put-together, organized and balanced people appear - most of the time, they are just procrastinating as much, are just as much a ball of anxiety as everyone and are trying to get their shit together like everybody else - myself 100000% included! If I can do it (which I question a lot!), you can as well!!! ᕙ( * •̀ ᗜ •́ * )ᕗ I believe you are a wonderful and kind person, so please don’t put too much pressure on yourself!! ❤(๑❛ω❛๑)ว  Everything will turn out beautifully, I promise you. 

[l000ey]

date → kayler

✧ pairing; kim jongin x zhou jia (ft. lalisa manoban, park chaeyoung, jennie kim, lee seunghoon, rae dara and mentions of kim jiwon, kim jinwhan, kim hanbin, byun baekhyun and do kyungsoo)

✧ summary; after years without talking kai decides to recontact with skyler asking her to go on a date

✧ warnings; insecurity, jennie maybe being fake

✧ note; jennie is not being completely fake, she was just jealous of skyler for getting a boy as handsome as kai but she tries to swallow jealousy and be a good friend

2017

'Bitches dancin' naked in my livin 'room' Chris Brown’s voice again rumbled throughout the room, the melody of the song mingled with the rapid and tired breaths of Skyler who was lying on the floor after having danced the song a couple of times. Her eyes were closed due to fatigue and her skin was sweaty, therefore sticky.

Skyler was sad, tired and her heart was broken. The asshole called Hanbin had broken her heart several months ago and although her head, Jinhwan and Bobby kept telling her again and again that she should get over it, she couldn’t. It wasn’t easy to overcome that the boy who had once been her best friend and who was in love with, she wanted but couldn’t.

The song changed as soon as Chris sang the last verse and a few seconds later she could hear the first chords of a song of Halsey. She laughed feeling a bitter taste growing in her throat as she recognized the song.

'I'm bad at love but you can not blame me for tryin'.

She sighed murmuring the lyrics while she felt like a tear fell down her cheek, she didn’t really know if it was a tear or sweat but when it touched her lips and could taste the taste of she was already used for a few months she knew it was a tear. A sob came out a few seconds after the first tear escaped, another after tanother and followed by more creating a river in her face.

'You know I'm bad at love'.

She sighed before bringing her left arm to her face and covering her eyes with it. Her nose blew and she dropped her shoulders even lying on the floor, the music was interrupted by a notification. Skyler ignored it thinking that it was possibly Bobby complaining that Zeus had bite him again or maybe it was Donghyuk asking if she had finished with the dance room but more notifications interrupted the music and her time to become a martyr.

She snorted, wiping her tears with the sleeve of her shirt before getting up from the floor and crawling to her phone, which was a few meters away lying on the floor connected to the speaker.

She frowned, typing the password, when she entered the message application she saw an unknown number.

unknown

Hey

It’s kai

Kim jongin

From exo

Your ex husband

She let out a small laugh as she read the last message feeling a little surprised. What was Kim Jongin doing sending her a message?.

me

hey

unknown

Oh, you answered

me

why i wouldn’t ?

She smiled again as she dialed the number with his name, shaking her head to the sound of the new song she had put on.

kai

I don’t know

I just thought that maybe you'll be too busy to talk to me

me

i was just dancing

what do you write me for?

sorry if the question sounded ill-mannered, sunbaenim

kai

Oh no!

It seems normal that you ask

And you do not have to call me sunbaenim

You can talk to me informally if you want

me

okay

thank you

i guess

kai

You are welcome

I wrote to you because I wanted to see if you would like to go somewhere, SM gave us free time and I have not gone out in a while and Baekhyun and kyungsoo was watching our edition of We Got Married and I thought about you and that we haven’t talked for a long time

I wanted to go out with you and...I don’t know, see each other and talk about how our lives go while we drink a coffee or something

It doesn’t have to be a coffee!

If you don’t like it, we can drink a smoothie or eat an ice cream

I invite

"Does he want to go out with me?" Her brows furrowed in confusion and curiosity as she nibbled the nail of her index finger, looked at her reflection in the mirror trying to assimilate the situation.

me

sure!

i would love to

kai

Are you free?

me

now?

kai

yes

me

yes

kai

Perfect

I can go pick you up at eight at YG

if it seems good to you, of course

She opened her eyes wide as she looked at the time. Six and a half. She swallowed hard before feeling her pulse quicken, sighed trying to calm down and brought her fingers to the keyboard, realizing she was shivering.

"Shit" She let go of the cell phone that fell quickly on her legs. She took a hand to her hair to make a face when she felt fat. "Calm down, Jia. Fuck” She growled before picking up the device again.

me

sure, see you at eight.

She left the chat before dialing Lisa's number, bit one of her acrylic nails while waiting for the thai to pick up the phone. She clicked her tongue as she realized her action and quickly removed her finger from her lips.

"Jiji~" Lisa's sweet voice sounded just as she got up. She hurried over to grab her jacket and bag before leaving the room.

"Lalisa!" She shouted desperately pressing the elevator button "I think I have a date and it's in less than two hours, I'm sweaty and I've cried. I need your help. Why did you take so long to pick up the phone?".

"Uh" The redhead made a sound "Have you cried? Why? We hadn’t agreed that you weren’t going to cry more for Hanbin? "

"Did I tell you that I have an date in less than two hours and all you've heard is that I cried?" She raised an eyebrow before muttering a "Finally" When the elevator doors opened, she got into it almost running and pressed the button again quickly.

"Wait, do you have a date?" The thai asked before jumping in her place, beginning to get excited "Really? With whom? He is handsome? Sure he is handsome, you are very beautiful unnie, you need someone who is at your level. And I am very happy that you finally decided to overcome Hanbin".

"Lisa, focus" She snapped her fingers as if Blackpink's maknae was in front of her.

"Yes, sorry".

"Are you in the company? I need your help" She moved the bag that hung from her left shoulder to reach it, opened it in a quick movement and checked that she had her hygiene products and a change of clothes decent enough to go out with a boy.

"Yes, I'm in the cafeteria with Chaeyoung and Jennie" Noises that could be identified as the sound of the chopsticks and the voices of both girls named before confirmed it.

"I have to take a shower but I need you to help me with makeup, combing my hair and I need you to feed me so bring me something from the cafeteria, please" As soon as the elevator opened, she ran to the women's changing rooms, not caring that Seunghoon and Red were there.

"Hey, Sky—" The older one tried to say hello but she raised her hand as she reached down to pick up the shampoo she had dropped.

"I don’t have time!" She exclaimed before resuming her way.

Seunghoon looked at his sunbae, who shrugged before walking to the elevator. "Don’t look at me, it's been years since I stopped trying to understand that girl".

An hour later Skyler was sitting in front of Jennie, Rosé and Lisa, who surrounded her trying to figure out what makeup and hairstyle will agree with the situation.

"You should fix her hair" Jennie pointed to the older of the maknaes, who nodded, positioning herself behind the chinese "Lisa and I will do the makeup."

The three went to work while Skyler tried to calm down, feeling nervous about the date. She told herself again and again that they would only go out as friends, that a boy like Jongin wouldn’t want anything with her.

How would he want something with her if even Hanbin hadn’t wanted something with her?.

"You still haven’t told us who your secret prince is" Jennie muttered before placing her hand on her leg trying to stop the repeated movement that was making her nervous.

"I'm sorry" She muttered, stopping her movement.

"Yeah, I understand that you haven’t told them but to me?" The redhead brought her hand to her chest, positioning it above her heart, giving her a dramatic look "I am your best friend, you should have told me the second I answered that call ".

"You were too distracted to listen to me" She chided, remembering that she had only heard one of the many things she had said just an hour ago.

The thai girl shrugged, placing a pout on her lips. Chaeyoung laughed while twisting some black strands "It's okay if you don’t want to tell us."

"But!—"

Park gave the maknae a look. "It's called respecting the privacy of people, Lisa"

"It's Kai."

The three stopped their actions immediately releasing a gasp of surprise, they looked at each other making Jia open her eyes. As soon as she looked at their expressions she rolled her eyes, knowing that she had guessed correctly that they were going to exaggerate the situation.

"You say Kai of exo?"

"Yes"

"Kim Jongin?"

"Yes" She snorted before the girls began to scream. She grimaced in discomfort at hearing so much screaming around her, her ears began to ache.

"God, that's amazing!"

"It's Kai, do you know what that means?!" Lisa caught her by the shoulders and began to shake her.

"He's so handsome" Rosé sighed, just like a lover thinking about her beloved.

"I'm happy for you, Sky" Jennie gave her a sweet smile before giving a final touch to her right eyebrow. She smiled contentedly with her result when she separated to observe her "Voilà, perfect."

At the same moment her phone rang, she looked at the time on her watch and pressed her lips in a thin line to see it was eight o'clock. She sighed looking at the girls, who were watching her waiting for her next move. She accepted the call.

"Hey, I'm down already. Come down whenever you want" His voice sounded sweet as honey in her ears, she nodded getting up.

"Right now i’m going down, let me take my stuff" Lisa let out a choked cry causing Rosé to throw herself on top of her to silence her, before the push Manoban's body collided with the table causing a boat of lacquer to fall to the ground.

"What was that? Are you okay?" Jongin's worried voice filled her ears.

"Oh yes, it's been the speaker, it's kind of old and broken. It often makes strange noises" She glared at her best friend.

"Hey-"

"Okay, see you now" And then he cut the call.

She looked at the girls feeling insecurity and fear pierce her body. She dropped into the chair again "I don’t know if I'm ready for this."

The three girls again exchanged a glance before the two maknaes turned to see the eldest of the room, who looked at them with a frown before sighing and nodding. She approached her, bending down to be at her height.

"Hey" She called her attention making Jia to look at her, rubbing her thigh gently, trying to comfort her "It's okay, you deserve it. You've been crying a lot for a boy who was an idiot for let you go and it's okay but you need to go ahead and meet more people".

"And if he doesn’t love me either?" Her voice came out in a whisper breaking the heart of the trio "What if he just wants me to have sex like Hanbin did?".

"Then you will find another. It's good that they break your heart, that will make you stronger and so you can find someone who is brave enough to take that strong heart and take care of it as if their life depended on it" She got up and took both hands and pushed her upwards, making her get up, she fixed her jacket and gave her another smile while the maknaes approached and remained stuck to the back of her unnie "Now go and make him fall in love with your smile".

Finally Skyler smiled and hugged her, extending her arms to indicate to Rosé and Lisa come to make a group hug "Thank you girls, I love you".

"Go away" Kim pushed her, making them laugh.

"It'll be late for you, Ji" The big-eyed redhead handed her the purse, the chinese nodded before showing them one of her biggest smiles and leaving the room.

She went down to the door of the building feeling butterflies in her stomach that were struggling to come out of her throat in the form of a shrill scream. When she arrived, she saw him leaning against the car, watching the building with curiosity.

He looked so handsome.

She approached him timidly "Hello."

"Hello, Skyler" He gave her a smile that warmed her heart. For a few seconds they stayed there, looking into each other's eyes with shy smiles and a slight discomfort that surrounded them, noting the nerves they both felt. He broke the eye contact by shaking his head before opening the car door "Ready for our date?"

Oh, so it was a date.

[jincherie]

RHAAAAAA. IM SO EXCITED 4 SIREN!JIN!!! UR SNEEP PEEP WAS SO G8. CANT W8. THIS IS EXACTLY THE KIND OF CELEBRATION JIN NEEDS 4 HIS BDAY. IM V EXCITED. CAN U FEEL MY EXCITEMENT?? WHAT ARE THESE FLOWERS HE HAS?? SIREN!JIN IS RADIATING SUCH BDE THAT EVEN THE LADY IN THE ELEVATOR CAN FEEL IT. DONT BLAME HER. I WAS FEELING IT THRU MY SCREEN. !!!!!!!!!! 💖🔥😋

GAH i know u sent this before I posted it but I hope it lived up to ur expectations!!!!! i was so happy to be writing jin again lmao!!! thank u so much for hyping it up and sending this babe!!! ily !!!! 💖💗💗💕💞❣️💝💓💖💕

sergentculotte said: Oh maaan… Thar siren!Seokjin was everything I needed! Funnily enough, I watched two mermaid movies tonight, the little mermaid (the new movie) and aquamarine, and then I got the notification that you posted, what a perfect addition to my great merfolk-y night! Thanks again for making me feel stuff with your words, xoxo 

UGH YES FCK we love mer-moods in this house!!! fuccc!!!!! thank u so much for reading baby I hope you enjoyed it !!! 💖💗 ugh its been so long since i watched other merfolk-y movies jhfbjbf

Anonymous said: hi, I just found your account because I was scrolling through bts imagines and I was reading a lullaby on canvas for a good 5 minutes (you write so well by the way and now I’m staying up to read your other stuff lol 💗💗) and the app crashed so when I put in bts imagines again it didn’t show up so it’s almost been an hour and I just found your account/ the story again and I had to follow just to make sure I wouldn’t lose your account

HAHA love an obligatory follow!! But I am so so glad you’re here and that you enjoyed lullaby on canvas, thank u so much for reading and sending this my love!!! 💖💗 I’m glad you liked it enough to look for it again :)

rinatemme said: Hello! “A lullaby on canvas” is one of those works that made me feel so happy to read, it has an amazing plot, the descriptions are wonderful and you can practically feel the atmosphere, taste it. Thank you for writing it

hey babe thank u so much for reading aloc and sending such a lovely message!! i’m so glad you like it and think those things, thank u so much!!! 💖💗

Anonymous said: oh my GOD YOUR NEW FIC IS SO! GOOD! WHAT! THE ! FUCK! Allsldksjaldlslaldldjsjjslslsj have an amazing day 💜💜💜💜💜

thank you so much!!! sob!!! you too my love!! thank u for reading and sending this !!! 💖💗💗💕

Anonymous said: hi babe!!! i finally had the time to read a lullaby on canva and T____T this was really freakin cute !!!! and the way jin calls yn flower…. perhaps i cried a little… i love ur writing sooo much ahhh 

nfhbfhjbfhgf god listen i am the biggest slut for a good pet name so i fnjhbfjhbf FFUCKKK i love it too!! sm !!! thank you so much for taking the time to read it, and then for sending his babe!! ily!! 💖

captainship97 said: So I read lullaby on canvas and I loved it! I do have a question though about a siren’s kiss. I’ve done a little research trying to see what mythology says about kissing a siren and didn’t find very much. So when you say that it was taking life force, was it just energy, or life span? If the reader were to continue to kiss Jin here and there would it be considered dangerous or something they can regenerate with sleep or something? Loved the story!!! 💜💜💜    

HAHAHAHA ok to be fair i pulled a lot of shit right out my ass but I wrote that in concurrence with the idea that sirens, at least in this au, ‘traditionally’ lured sailors etc to their demise as they feed on their souls/energy/essence. I figured a way that made sense for them to create a link and siphon the energy would be via kiss. In this sense, I guess they’re not that different from how I shape incubi in my fics LOL. to answer your question I’d say its more like energy! it can regenerate, but too much taken can be harmful. In this au, some sirens are especially greedy and drink it all in at once– they’re the ones that started the myths :3 

ALSO seokjin can control how much he takes, but he can’t stop the kiss from acting as a siren kiss– UNLESS the recipient is his bonded & mated, in which case his mate will be resistant. she can still give energy if she wants but its more a choice. So MC is all good in the end!! (also i’m glad you liked it!!! tysm for reading it and sending this!!! 💖💗)

Anonymous said: OKAY I have so many questions! First of all, seokjin x reader siren fic, I loved it! But also, is it a one-shot, because now I’m just, my mind is, I wasn’t ready. The picture? What is it? Why is the reader so moved by it? When did they meet? Did he move there after seeing her? Did he meet her after she moved to the apartment? How long has the longing been going on? Does he sing for her? because of her? Did he leave his life behind because of her? Just, amazing. no words, incredible, as always. 

it is a oneshot, unfortunately! and seokjin’s artworks aren’t of anything concrete, but a combination of colours, shapes and patterns that evoke feeling in the viewers. there is nothing recognisable within them, yet the contents call to the deepest parts of a person’s being and tug. It is especially potent if the person gazing upon the artwork is the one that he had in mind while making it, as MC found hehehehe. its a little bit magical :)

And they “met” a year or so prior, when Seokjin moved in to the apartment next to hers! Although, that wasn’t the first time he’d seen her...

And yes, when he sings at night it was always for/about her. Ugh our lovesick little siren, singing mournfully about his “impossible, unrequited love”.... over time the tune changed though, often his song reflected how he felt after an interaction he had with her during the day-- it was usually sad if he didn’t see her. And regarding the last question, he left because he wanted to explore and travel in part but perhaps.... also bc of her.... :3

anyway thank u so much for reading and expressing such interest, I love having the opportunity to expand my worlds a little more for you all! thank u babe! ily!

Anonymous said: ahh… i just dropped by to say how much i adore your work. i reread the recent siren!jin fic bc i wanted to do a mock-up story board for the reveal scene (one of my favourite ever parts!!) and i loved the way you wrote it so much, like the whole fic but also that scene in particular. your fics make me so flustered and i get hot cheeks and everything - and yet i find myself creeping back for more. *‘you cast a spell on me’ plays from the speakers* 

a m-mock up storyboard? OMO-- and gah I’m so glad you liked that scene! I love that scene too!! It’s one I had in my head from the moment I started brainstorming and planning it. Perhaps one day I will illustrate it as I imagined it but in the meantime.... ugh... i love it so much. i’m so so glad you liked aloc,, and even my other fics too! thank u for reading and for sending this in babe!!! ily!!! i hope u have a wonderful day!!!

[crazylivingx]

me expressing my love for love yourself: answer

it’s only been 3 days into 2019 and i’ve been emo about love yourself: answer because i recently bought the album in korea and their lyricism makes me want to cry pls ignore this if you don’t wanna read about my feelings towards the solo songs released throughout the love yourself era because the pure genius and passion put into this project is truly astounding yalls pls love yourselves this is also really personal you’ve been warned (also apologies if i’ve made any grammatical errors lmao)

*i’m going by the ly: answer sequence

(as im writing this in my language and literature class my lecturer goes “my daughter loves bts” and cue my friend and i shouting the member’s names to guess his daughter’s bias and its jhope like wow we stan a jhope stan he said she thinks he “has such a blinding smile’ and thats honestly the biggest mood)

euphoria

this song is innocent af when i first heard it i knew it was a bopping bop the synths in the chorus can kick me to switzerland i barely even remember what the video was about all i remember is jungkook and that yellow jacket lmao his vocal runs when he sings “won’t you please stay in dreams” is just heavenly it honestly feels like i’m floating through the clouds with this song this song can convert people who don’t like good songs with synths bet i can’t imagine anyone other than jungkook singing this song tbh if you get an s.o. i hope you experience this song

favourite line (i know it’s not a singular line pls bear with me):

You’re the sun that rose again in my life

A reincarnation of my childhood dreams

I don’t know what these emotions are

Am I still dreaming?

This dream is a blue mirage in the desert

A priori deep inside of me

I’m so happy, I can’t breathe

My surroundings are getting more and more transparent

I hear the far-away ocean

Across the dream, over the horizon

I’m going to the place that’s getting clearer

Take my hands now

You are the cause of my euphoria

trivia 起 just dance

this whole song shows how much jhope loves dancing and it’s so sweet??? wanting to dance with your partner under the moonlight and slowly falling in love???? the song just screams jhope especially with the chorus you can just imAGiNe him dancing like he has no bones because he DoeSn’T,,,, it has a synthetic feel but it also feels really passionate and human like jhope can #getit we stan a multitalented man the lyrics in this song is probably the lightest but it’s still fun and easy to understand and listen to

favourite line (yea i know it’s like an entire verse but i love their lyrics okay):

In my muddy life

You were like a single stem flower

Even this suffocating studio

If we’re together, turns into paradise

My dreams that once had no answer

Now becomes something we can relate to

Because our rhythm is matching

Because we have our dance, it’s a fate-like beat

serendipity

i remember covering my screams when the mv for this song came out before dna was released and my mom instantly knew what was up lmao this song was kind of my style of music with the #chillvibes it gave out but the chill-ness of the song didn’t make forgettable i’ve played this song in the car before and now my dad can recognize it lol even khalid liked it you go you funky little chimchim,,, i never really paid attention to the lyrics in this song but it sounds really innocent and possessive at the same time lmao i’ll give bts the benefit of the doubt (i also prefer the short version over the full length version don’t kill me)

favourite line (at least these are lines. i know i said line not lines let me live):

As much as my heart flutters, I’m worried

Destiny is jealous of us

//

Since the creation of the universe

Everything was destined

Just let me love you

trivia 承 love

this song man. namjoon. the piano chords in the beginning is what gives me life. the moment i heard them i instantly knew this was going to be a fave. i love the slight discordance no matter what i will instantly start bopping to it because it’s such a bop that you HAVE to bop along with it. rm loves wordplay in his lyrics, and when it crosses with his intellect something beautiful emerges. this song feels like a flower i love the melody of chords like the chords sold me immediately. and then after i was sold the lyrics stabbed me. there is no escape.

favourite line (god where do i begin):

I live so I love

//

I'm just a human, human, human (the ㅁ in 사람 saram which means human)

You erode all my corners

And make me into love, love, love (becomes ㅇin 사랑 sarang which means love)

We're humans, humans, humans

In that myriad of straight lines

My love, love, love

When you sit on top of it and you become my heart (if the ㅇ the word 사랑 is squished, it’ll look like a heart ♡)

//

You make I to an O

I to an O

Because of you

I know why human (saram) and love (sarang) sound similar

You make live to a love

Live to a love

Because of you

I know why a person should live by love

//

It's a long way from I to U

Fuck, JKLMNOPQRST

I crossed all the letters and I reached you 

(i really suggest going to genius’s website to fully understand the song if you want to)

singularity

kim taehyung better square up because i would buy burger king and fight him in the parking lot because he stole my toenail,,,, bighit released this song while i was in hell aka university and bOY was i hshshshhshdhdh <— thats the best way i can describe my feelings,,, like he made my tears flow upwards or something the music video was aMAZING and i was shooketh ihatehimsmjkidontbutyouknowwhatimean back to the song - serendipity was also pretty chill but in a darker way and i love it as well. to me the lyrics mirror fake love because it portrays how walking on thin ice feels and how you’ll lose your own voice just to suffer to make sure the person you love will continue loving you (the lyrics are also really slow so it made it easy for me to read the lyrics in karaoke lmao) singularity was a goddamn package for me the mv, the performance and v himself just hshshshshs when i listen to this song i feel like i’m lying down on a giant leaf floating on a clear pond watching a dim but twinkling meteor shower with giant water flowers surrounding me and fireflies are swaying along with wisps of smoke and this is getting too long winded i’ll stop here as i’m writing this i just remembered namjoon wrote this song in one shot after having surgery what a mans

favourite line (its long but it doesn’t feel complete if i break it up):

A thick ice has formed

In the dream I shortly went into

My agonizing phantom pain is still the same

Have I lost myself

Or have I gained you

I suddenly run to the lake

There’s my face in it

Please don’t say anything

Reach my hand out to cover the mouth

But in the end, spring will come someday

The ice will melt and flow away

Tell me if my voice isn’t real

trivia 轉 seesaw

oh boy. suga. min yoongi. this has been said before but the use of seesaw as a metaphor for a dying/toxic relationship is truly artistic and clever. the way he describes it in his lyrics creates a really clear picture of what’s happening. how if one person gets off a seesaw the other will get hurt as they’ll start to fall to the ground, how neither wants to get off because they know they’ll hurt whoever’s on the other side, and how staying or leaving this “repeated seesaw game” will hurt the both of them no matter what choice they choose. i’ll let the lyrics speak for themselves. (suga singing and dancing was also a pleasant surprise i fell on the floor)

favourite line (get ready i’m about to put like 80% of the song in here the lyrics is a masterpiece):

Repeated seesaw game

I'm tired of this

Repeated seesaw game

We're getting tired of each other

Were the petty arguments the start?

The moment I became heavier than you

Because there's never been parallels in the first place

Maybe I became more greedy and tried to fit in with you

Is there really a need to keep repeating ourselves

Saying this was love and this is love?

They're tired of each other, they seem to hold the same hand

//

People can be so crafty

They know they’ll get hurt if one person is missing

Because we don't want to be the villains

In the midst of a series of vague responsibilities

And we get so tired or if that we finally became parallel

But we didn’t want this kind of parallel

At first, we showed off who was heavier

We'd brag and smile

Now we're trying to beat each other

We're in a competition

The fire of a quarrel

It’ll only end if someone gets off right here

We’re acting like we’re comforting each other

But it’s mixed with thorns

Can’t keep doing this, we need to make a decision

//

(Hol' up Hol' up) I walk on this seesaw without you

(Hol' up Hol' up) Just like the beginning when you weren't here

(Hol' up Hol' up) I walk on this seesaw without you

(Hol' up Hol' up) I'm getting off this seesaw without you

(like trivia 承 love, you can read more about the song on genius’s website)

epiphany

stream epiphany. our boy kim seokjin’s vocals have truly improved huh. this to me felt like a response to awake (you can fLY JIN) and i applaud bighit for giving him this song. he finally gets the recognition and lines he deserves smh. you really feel like a proud parent when you watch the fancams throughout the love yourself tour and hear how his voice improves after each performance. the song is also kind of the ‘final act’ to all the solos in ly: answer and they finally get to spread their message of “its hard to love yourself, but that’s why you should so you can love others as well”. after becoming the shell of what you once were, the only way you can fill it up again is to love yourself, and that’s my pov of the whole point of the song. i’m gonna be honest i wasn’t really into this song in the beginning but i started to fall in love with it after a few listens (i listened to it sm that when i was downloading the ly: answer album i forgot to add epiphany cause i was streaming it LMAO)

favourite line (i know they’re verses as well hshdhds):

I’m the one I should love in this world

Shining me, precious soul of mine

I finally realized so I love me

Not so perfect but so beautiful

I'm the one I should love

//

I may be a bit blunt, I may lack some things

I may not have that shy glow around me

But this is me

My arms, my legs, my heart, my soul

bonus song - answer: love myself

doing a pewdiepie and adding a bonus song lmao my first listen of this song was in my friend’s house and we had the lyrics on and let me tell you the moment we read the lyrics we wanted to hug bts because it was so soft and it was so uwu we were so ready to love ourselves lol yes it sounds like a church song but like epiphany i learned to love it too this was also my first song of 2019 so if you decide to, please listen to it with an open heart

favourite line (hey look actual lines this time yes lines not line):

Maybe I fell in order to take the place of those countless stars

The target of thousands of bright arrows is me alone

//

Why do you keep trying to hide under your mask?

Even all the scars from your mistakes make up your constellation

that’s all from me bye sorry for the long post

bighit pls hire me as an album promoter