#feeling so emotional posting this one!!!
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high infidelity
pairing: landoscar word count: 17.4k rating: mature tags: arranged marriage, childhood friends to lovers, family issues
If he was honest, he had been feeling… different. For a long time now.
A motion in his peripheral vision makes him look at the forest again, squinting for a second before a big smile inevitably appears on his face and his legs start moving before he can even order them to.
The wind pushes against his face and hair whilst he runs, he feels a bit like a child but finds he doesn’t really care for it, because Lando is here.
or
The one where Oscar has always had his plans laid before him, but realizes he doesn't want to follow them, and Lando has always been taught to follow his dreams, but actually dreams of someone.
🌾
the first story I ever wrote 🥹 this has been sitting on my docs for some time but finally felt like it was time to let it go
hope you enjoy it 🤍 check it out on ao3
#feeling so emotional posting this one!!!#they're my babies#but i do promise i'm working on something that's not landoscar alright#formula 1 rpf#f1 rpf#landoscar#lando norris#oscar piastri#clari writes
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the transgender urge to curl up like a small fluffy animal against someone you love’s warm body and make little mewling and sighing and whining sounds as they pet you and praise you for having tried so hard to be human until you fall asleep
#it’s one of those days#it’s one of those nights#i’m fine and everything is ok rn. but my brain is kind of not working great#i feel so… limited. like there’s a lot i want to do but my energy and focus just isn’t there#and my emotions are just always lowkey sad and lonely rn#so i’m just desperate for physical affection#but i can’t really get much of that atm#i just want to cuddle for an hour with someone#maybe more#*tired and sad puppy noises*#personal post
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i hit 1k followers recently!!!! yipee!!!!!!! thank you all!!! so in celebration here’s all of my completed isat doodle pages, from oldest to newest. go nuts with them!! and maybe don’t look at the first doodle page too closely. it’s Old.
(no greyscale version below for once! just some mushy ramblings. you don’t have to read them don’t worry)
hhhhhha?? so many people. where did you come from. how did you all find me.
ok but seriously, thank you all so much for all the support. i never really. expected to make it this far? like, ever?? i’ve mentioned it a few times on here, but i’ve been a lurker for the past… 2 years, i think? and even before that, i never gained much traction outside of a couple posts. so this has been. very new to me!! in a nice way!! it’s weird to feel like an actual member of a community!! that people know about!
the idea of finally coming back to social media was Daunting (i literally got stress hives writing my first post lol) and the warm reception really. meant a lot?? i don’t think i would’ve ever gotten the courage to come back if i hadn’t been encouraged to by the people over at the isat discord!!
the fact that people actually care about my art still doesn’t feel real?? seeing people take inspiration from my art is just. surreal. just. auagssh. thank you all so so much for everything, i really do appreciate it!!! i’m really glad to be in this community. sorry if this all sounds sappy and long winded i’ve just got a lot of emotions about this whole thing!!
(also as a bonus for reading all this or whatever. here’s a concept page for isatscryption! it felt a little out of place next to my normal canvases so i’m putting it down here! yipee! sorry my notes here are so disjointed auauau…)
#marshdoodles#isat#in stars and time#isat spoilers#isatscryption#not tagging this as isas since this is mostly unrelated#aaaa sorry for. rambling so long and stuff#i know this is tumblr and follower counts aren’t supposed to mean anything but. i still feel Emotions about it!!#i cant help it!!!#that first doodle page i made is from may btw! these actually line up pretty well with the months#i never got around to posting these because like. i already posted a lot of these drawings on their own? it felt weird#but this is a milestone!! so i can post them if i so desire#also. basically all of the drawings save a few on the first one give me Hives#you can tell i wasn’t used to drawing these designs…#anyways. i keep saying it but thank youall so much????#just. wauauaua.
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Different standards
#didnt mean to do this one in quote unquote colour but it wasnt legible without it so. heres a treat i suppose#isat#isat spoilers#in stars and time#in stars and time fanart#isat fanart#isat loop#isat bonnie#lucabyteart#coughs up a lung. anyway. ramble time as per usual. this is what i was warming up for btw in case it wasnt obvious#besides being another entry in the 'letting bonnie read loop for filth on accident' series. this is mostly self indulgent musings on#headcanons (and i will just use that word here.) ive previously rambled about in other tags and posts#namely: in the scenario that loop integrates into the party as a New Person for quite a while before The Truth Come Out. i feel they have#a decent chance at really scoring a slam dunk in becoming a guardian figure for bonnie? loop's demeanor is already colder and a tiny#bit more level-headed than siffrin's in the way they seem to discuss bonnie with them. namely pointing out that bonnie#never really hated them. it seems to be one thing they're genuinely at peace with? they've seen by now the truth that bonnie#was just scared and upset. and likely now knows that what bonnie wants is to be treated with grown-up respect within reason. plus loop#already scores bonus points with bonnie since they didnt 1. fuck up bad like sif did in act 5 and 2. saved sif in the party's eyes#... but then when it turns out that this clean-slate relationship with a stranger was siffrin being deceitful? must have been odd.#bonnie seems to really dislike being lied to. the question is whether they'd see it that way? would they feel betrayed there?#anyway. this is set after all those emotions are at least settled some. loop able to be more physically affectionate... and yet#still not letting themselves be quite as close as they'd like perhaps. perhaps...#anyway translucent pyjamas because i dont care if you're comforting a crying child you've GOT to SERVE!!!#and also i feel like the party probably wouldn't let loop stay completely naked for that long. especially not post-reveal anyway
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"feels like we could go on for forever this way.." (x)
#wooo new header for me <33#also back to skk posting i missed them sm#wanted to pratice some scenery and try a new style which simplifies my current one and focuses more on colors and painting#and i'm super happy with how it turned out i think i won#for forever fits skk so well it rly brings back the bittersweet memories of when they were once partners and each others halves#and it just feels reminiscent of days gone by and they were once so close but time and life their own decisions have torn them apart#ben platt's voice is so pretty i love this song sm i heard it for the first time again in years and was slammed by all the emotions😭😭#i was so normal abt deh when it first came out i swear#bungou stray dogs#bungo stray dogs#bsd#dazai osamu#osamu dazai#nakahara chuuya#chuuya nakahara#soukoku#skk#lotus draws
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Watching ace attorney playthroughs again and this isn't even enough of a reach to be a joke this twitter post is just exactly what happened
#i'm sure other people have made the same connection but listen#sometimes u make posts bc you think the masses should see them#sometimes you make posts bc you're talking to yourself#this was the point when i went “oh they're actually gay the internet didn't just make that one up”#“you gave me unnecessary feelings get out!!!”#i heart how edgeworth is so confident in the courtroom and then has no idea how to deal with his personal emotions#neurodivergent king#miles edgeworth#narumitsu#ace attorney
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(small child starting to meltdown) “Hey, hey. *snapping* We’ll play later, okay?”
#idk why but this is making me emotional#something about how jack is surrounded by all this chaos and all these people#but he recognizes the rising wobbling voice and the getting-overwhelmed body language#how many almost-meltdowns do we think jack had to snap little lukey out of?#lukey always so intense and feeling things so hard#and jack always so perceptive and calming him right back down#also something very sad about jack on his draft day promising his little cousin that “we’ll play later”#because after this day jack’s life changes forever#he goes from high schooler to full-time professional hockey player#a brutal rookie year. a life lived on the road. injuries.#did he ever actually get to play one last game with his little cousin?#did jack know it would be an empty promise?#jack hughes#post#jhughes & kids tag
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Jason after a certain incident
@bonerot19 enjoy :)
Poll is in the weblogs (why did my spellcheck change it to that???) Ahem REBLOGS to decide what comfort to give him, so far the cat distribution system is winning
Edit: the cat distribution system won! stay tuned for whenever I finish that
#Now that I'm looking at it I'm seeing everything wrong with this drawing#So I need to post it right now before I try to fix it into oblivion#Anyway#I don't feel like I nailed the emotions in this one so prepare for more drawings of Jason suffering#Soapysudz art#As I chase the high of getting emotions onto the....screen? Since its digital art ig you could say that#soaps art#jason todd fanart#Batarang incident#To me patching yourself up is such a lonely and painful thing#The pain being caused by your dad choosing to throw a knife at your neck to save your murderer must be so much worse on top of that
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NO MORE ASSOCIATING THINGS WITH FEMMES ONLY BECAUSE THEY ARE PINK!HYPERFEM FEMMES ARE GREAT AND I LOVE YOU CAMPY FEMMES WHO EMBODY PINK BUT ALSO JESUS CHRIST CAN YOU GUYS NOT GO MORE THAN ONE DAY W/O TRYING TO SHOEHORN FEMMES INTO BEING ONLY PINK UWU BABIES. I AM FEMME AS IN GRASS AS IN DIRT AS IN TREE BARK AS IN WEEDS SPROUTING THROUGH THE SIDEWALK CEMENT. FEMME AS IN GENDER NONCONFORMITY AS IN FUCK YOU MY FEMININITY IS WHAT *I* SAY IT IS. FEMME AS IN DEPTH AND DARKNESS AND WARMTH AND TERROR. FEMME AS IN CAVES. FEMME AS IN LIGHTNING. FEMME AS IN AN AMALGAMATION OF TRAITS THAT I HAVE DECIDED ARE FEMININE REGARDLESS OF WHAT SOCIETY SAYS. FUCK IS IT THAT HARD TO UNDERSTAND?!???
#personal#i am emotional yes#over the years ive had this blog I've made a few posts abt being femme#nd whether they're serious or jokey..... inevitably someone in the tags goes “ohhh yeah bc pink”#or in the case of what inspired this post: someone going “what about the pink ones” on my praying mantis post#and im just.#sick of it. im sick of femme being equated to pink and frilly girlie behaviors.#im sick of femme being equated to skirts and heels. to makeup. to skincare. to pristine nails exactly almond shaped.#im sick of ppl acting like All femmes aspire to this shit. im sick of femms being reduced to this shit.#and i love pink! i love pink! my phone theme is quite literally just black and pink all over.#im just. so tired of any expression of Femme identity being shoehorned into being a Specific type of femininity#especially as someone who DOES get dysphoric wearing skirts. wearing dresses. embodying the femme aesthetic yall are so set on making#if u guys wanna rb this i truly dont care#i just needed to scream#and this is one small thing#but the 2nd largest category of anon hate i have gotten since making this blog is str8 up homophobia from other “queer” folks#saying i cant be femme bc of how i present. calling me slurs (and using them as such) bc they cant understand femme as anything but that#my wife and i have our users in our personal discord server set as 2 different things of anon hate ive gotten#i have had OTHER FEMMES tell me i am not femme. femmes who Know im femme who still call me butch. femmes who ive corrected and been blocked#-by bc of it. the number 1 largest demographic of queerfolk who have me blocked rn is TME femmes who embody pink also#and i dont think its a coincidence at all. (and i know this bc i go to try and follow these ppl bc they get rbed on my dash & i cant)#and ik their blogs arent deleted bc some of them don't block my wife (tall. white. butch) and it cant be politics cause her and i rb#a lot of the same political shit (fuck. i think she rbs More than i do even. this is genuinely mainly a nsft blog)#and usually i don't say anything but im having a bad day so i get to be angry about this and if anyone fucking tries me i will block u#idc if we've been mutuals 4ever. im judt so tired of feeling like i am not Enough as a femme bc i dont embody this shit#im sick of this lameass lip service to he/him gnc femmes etc when the thin white 50s housewife femme is still what is preferred and loved#im sick of this lamesss lip service when y'all feel entitled to theorizing on other femmes genders bc u cant conceptualize a femme who does#wanna be hypetfeminine. im sick of it. im sick of it. im sick of it.#celebrity bun
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JUST GUYS BEIN' DOODS
redraw of the meme under the cut

original by @knightmarebug
#knight rider#kr#michael knight#kitt#knight industries two thousand#bonnie barstow#mk2000#art#shitpost#doodles#having gasoline in a glass one foot away from a flame is a really good idea michael. your brain damage is showing#those bars were just so if i posted it to insta it wouldnt crop but then i thought it looked hilariously cinematic and left them for here#im very charmed by all kitt's alternate scanner patterns. i wish they were used a little more in the show but iirc the one car they rigged#to do that broke in like season 2 or 3 and they couldn't fix it. so they had to go without u _ u#but big emotions means big lights. to me. so he's happy about the date :) the whole bar lights up#he did that Once when he was scared for his life and i did not stop thinking about it. big feels is big lights#anyway i dont know what michael expected to happen; he's in the foundation's public garage. idiot dumbass#bonnie should get chessboard earrings she deserves them#''i hate drawing cars'' - keeps entering car fandoms. keeps drawing cars.
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DATV explaining the 'Regret Prison'
A REGRET PRISON IS STUPID AND I'M TIRED OF PRETENDING THAT ITS NOT
TL;DR: a prison can serve as a metaphor but it shouldn't be entirely comprised of a metaphor.
From what I understood from what the game gave us: Solas has made a new prison to move the God's too - since bringing down the veil would free them from the Black City. This new prison is separate(?) from the fade or so far removed/contained that bringing down the veil would not compromise it...apparently. We interrupt his ritual, Solas gets sucked into the new prison he made, and the elven gods are free.
When Rook gets kicked into the fade they're physically there - which means it's a physical place in the fade, like how it was a mixture of physical/thought when we entered it in DAI. Which makes sense - the gods are real and living beings, they need to be in a place, there must be some aspect of physicality to it.
Alright, cool, it's a Black City 2.0 - I assume it's better defended to prevent people breaking in/out again?
NOPE.
We get there and it's a 'regret prison'?? It's tied to the regrets of those within it? Composed of regrets??? Solas had to wait for the right moment for Rook to be sufficiently 'full of regret' that they could switch places?
So is the prison tied to Solas's regrets? If so, how can Rook escape? The prison seems to work around the idea that it relies on the regrets of the person it's holding to work - which is how/why Rook was able to be trapped and later free themselves (along with whatever remains of the team apparently being able to do something on their end, not that we hear about it).
WHICH IS STUPID!
Are you telling me the prison intended to hold to megalomaniac elven gods was going to imprison them based on their own regrets? Is Solas assuming that Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nain are as self-pitying as he is? They'd break out quicker than Rook did! He made a time out corner for the elven gods to sit in and gave them an out if they reflected on their emotions/regrets or decided that they don't regret what they did. Elgar'nan, a spirit of tyranny, is not going to 'regret' his actions - he is going to justify them by telling himself and others that he knows what's best.
We can come across some of Solas's regrets in the prison if you run around a bit and explore:
Remnant of Failure - talking about the orb from Inquisition.
Remnant of Parting - talking about Mythal
Remnant of Reflection - more vague, talking about the Titans I believe.
So maybe he altered it - maybe he intended the prison to be 'locked' with his own regrets because after a millennia of having a pity party he still can't bring himself to self-reflect and look to the future. But what if Solas died? Or if his guilt lessened - would it diminish the strength of the regret prison?
We already have pre-established lore (though DATV has shown they don't really give a crap tbh) that once the being that has claimed/altered an area of the fade is slain, it's influence diminishes both in and outside of the fade. So if the prison was tied to his regrets then it would require Solas to basically live forever to keep it stable - especially if he brought down the veil and removed the one barrier that kept the world and the fade apart.
Rook and Solas needed some assistance to exit - but it doesn't seem like it was much! Solas used his dagger and Rook just...got out through a fade tear? This is Solas's 'more secure' second prison? It has a worse track record than the Black City! If Rook - who is not an elven god - managed to escape the regret prison what is to stop anyone else from breaking in and out of the prison?
And what did Solas intend to do with the blight - the bulk of which is apparently in the black city?? If bringing down the Veil would free the gods in the black city doesn't that mean that the blight would also be released?! Did he have a plan? Why does he go fully ahead with bringing down the veil at the end if the black city is still there and filled with blight?!
I get it: the 'regret prison' is a metaphor for how Solas holds onto the past and how Rook can move past their regrets and grow. He's trapped by the past - it's a prison. Cool. But this prison is supposed to by a physical place to contain the gods - not just to solely contain Solas. The mission is literally called 'A Cage for Gods'.
The Black City is an actual place that's so far out of reach of anywhere else in the fade that no mage can ever reach it while in dreams - let alone physically, which was only done once and took tremendous effort/blood sacrifices. It made sense - it was cool to see floating in the sky in DAO!
Though it's not said specifically, it's strongly implied that Arlathan is the Black City. You can see in the concept art that floating elven city is exactly the same as the black city in DAO! It's this foreboding thing just lurking in the sky - a constant reminder of the sin that led to the horrors of the blights and darkspawn. A real place with lore and history that also serves as a metaphor for the hubris and destruction of those who call themselves gods and act as tyrants -> for both the evanuris and the magisters.
I WANT TO UNDERSTAND THIS BIOWARE!
WHAT IS THIS KINGDOM HEARTS NONSENSE???!!
#we'll need Mickey and Donald to break us out of this one#this screams 'this sounds so cool lets put it in' and not 'how can we do something cool that works with the world we've established'#“it's metaphorical-” it can be metaphorical and make sense!!!#trying to invoke 'emotion' with that black and white tone and only succeeded in getting me to feel pure confusion and rage#THE FADE IS GREEN TINTED - THE LAST GAME WAS LITERALLY COLOUR THEMED AFTER IT#i'm passionate about the fade being green the same way i'm passionate about Aurora's dress being blue and Cinderella's being silver#solas's more secure second prison literally has a worse track record than the black city - why is he so dumb???#I regretted no choices in datv besides the decision to actually play this game lmao#if the game actually acknowledged that Rook's actions led to thousands of people dying maybe I'd feel something in the regret prison#no mention of treviso/ minrathous/ or southern thedas??#the team all knew the risks of what they were doing! they volunteered/made their own choices - ME2 did this so much better#played as an elf so I didn't even feel bad when Harding died because of the weird elf specific dialogue she had#I'm not sorry for the titans/what Solas did - I wasn't even there! Doesn't justify the shit that happened to the elves after either!#this game made me apathetic to LACE HARDING and i loved her in Inquisition#i'm sorry but I had more regret for choosing to speak mean to Merrill once than anything I did in this game#currently writing about the magisters sidereal in my lore post and I needed to blurt this out because its so stupid#typed out the word 'regret' so much is has no meaning in my head anymore lmao#datv critical#datv spoilers#bioware critical#dragon age the veilguard#veilguard critical
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Yeonjun about the strain he felt while preparing for his debut solo project ✙ "GGUM" MAKING FILM
#yeonjun#choi yeonjun#tomorrow x together#txt#ggum: making film#gifs#creations#userzaynab#useryeonbins#skyehi#rosieblr#megtag#hibiebear#heyiri#ultkpopnetwork#kpopccc#kpopco#this are like the rawest emotions we've seen from him... I feel... it's really sad to watch him like this#i mean I know they're under lots of pressure and stress#It's only natural when you work with so many people who you could potentially disappoint#and I know it was his choice to make this solo project happen now but i feel like the company could manage his schedule better#because why he films till 3 am and then right next day has a flight to another country for a concert...#and now we know from soobin they're super busy again#I'm worried his body will just say 'enough' one day and something bad will happen :(#and you have him work so hard and stress and then all this losers online whose biggest achievement is getting 100 likes on a post#writing the worst things about him for no reason... its not that hard to be kind and you dont need to have an opinion about everything :D#at the end of the day that celebrity you hate so much is still pretty and successful#and you're just a friendless jobless empty-headed rotten fool with likes on a post that mean nothing once you close the ap#I'm just glad all this is still fun for him and that he has such a great support system: his members family staff who care about him and us#all we can really do is support them and send them lots of love fr ;; you've done well my jjunie ily ♥
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hear me out - i think leon and nihilego would be a fun combo
their designs compliment each other well lol
(i like villain au ideas though, so i may be biased, aesthetic wise)
#art#pokemon swsh#pokemon sword and shield#pkmn swsh#pkmn sword and shield#champion leon#poke's doodles#pokemon sm#pokemon sun and moon#pkmn sm#pkmn sun and moon#nihilego#ultra beasts#uhhhh soooooooooo this is one of those reaaallll self indulgent pics lol#i wasnt gonna post it but i think it looks coollll#the context is also. super specific but.#summarise - i like the idea of angst and drama so a plot where somehow people and pkmn get fused by accident is---#a fun concept for me - especially when it leads to good guys becoming bad guys unwillingly in a way---#so i have a buncha doodles in my notebook of ultra beasts and characters being mixed up because im biased and love the ultra beasts lol#eternatus is also my second pic for this kinda plot--#nihilego is just a really cool pick for me SINCE it converts bad emotions into good ones for the victim#like. if the person does bad things they feel worse but technically Better because of nihilego's influence and thats such-#- a fountain for potential tbh#pasio is a good pick for a setting too due to all the different regions being together-#hold on im rambling too much about something so self indulgent sry lol
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it's about...longevity? stability? it's about natsume believing he'll be somewhere long enough to plant flowers and see them bloom. it's about him taking touko seriously when she asks him to tell her what flowers he wants to plant. it's about making something with his own hands, building a future with the fujiwaras. it's about him repairing a rundown home for someone else, restoring it because it's beloved to them, because it's the home of someone they love. it's about him seeing touko's joy and thinking about the youkai saying we'd like to look upon her happy face forever. it's about the box garden making him think of the fujiwaras' garden and his parents' garden, about the flowers being both the memory of flowers that bloomed there before, and the flowers that he and the youkai planted earlier that day. it's about him waking up in both worlds with sensei. it's about touko finding the petal in his hair. it's about him feeling how he falls short and the youkai saying, but you have such gentle hands...
#watch this right after the ephemeral ones to die instantly. i assume. i haven't tried it#i feel like so many of the emotional beats that destroy me in this story come down to impermanence#accepting loss and change. finding the beauty in transience. treating every encounter as something precious‚ knowing it's ephemeral#and this chapter is about...also accepting renewal? allowing oneself to think about the possibility of love lasting#allowing oneself to put down roots. nurturing what is there. building foundations. doing it for and with people#god you know what else you shouldn't watch this after if you don't want to keel over dead probably. the childhood home arc#natsume can now think of the memory of sitting with his father looking at his mother's garden#and associate it with warmth instead of pain. because he's no longer afraid of losing it. because of the trust he has built#because he knows he can build something. the people here have made it safe for him and he has and he is and he will#i am crying so hard i should be collecting my tears for water reclamation purposes#natsume's book of friends#natsume yuujinchou#natsuyuu meta#my posts#f
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the weight of family and the pull of gravity
#those are song lyrics listen im running out of dramatic one liners to use as captions HGFJKD#i like the DRAMA!! the DEVASTATION!!!! if it doesnt feel fitting to the emotional weight i feel then i will DISINTEGRATE ON THE SPOT#the pic looks more saturated as i post it than it does in photoshop so hmmmgh not sure how the balance will be? c'est la vie it's j for me#u can rip those fuckign birds from my cold dead hands. i wont give them up. sleepie made fun of me for my bird motifs BUT I LIKE THEM#I NEEDED THEM FOR THE COMP IT GGRGAGAHAHHH#twst#twisted wonderland#twst silver#silver vanrouge#twst spoilers#ch 7 spoilers#oh yea i wanna make an animatic to that song once ch7 is done. maybe.. i fucking HATE making animatics but its SOOOOO SILVER#blame lettie its her fault#suntails
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no you don't get it. i literally love stories where they dive into people's hearts/minds (literally or figuratively) sm it's my favourite type of storytelling.
#p5s#fairy ranmaru#shiguang daili ren#limbo the king#king in limbo#pet anime#pet manga#pet 2020#dmmd#homunculus#homunculus manga#sankaku mado no sotogawa wa yoru#the night beyond the tricornered window#sarazanmai#id invaded#paprika 2006#wonder egg priority#tedpost#it allows them to portray emotions in such visually interesting ways#and is a great way to make parallels between the person who's mind they're in and the main characters#these were all the ones i could think of rn but i bet theres more that i havent seen yet#also i only mentioned scramble here because i think it does this concept better than regular p5 lmao.#FEEL FREE TO SUGGEST ME MORE OF THESE#doesnt matter what medium or genre!! could be a book a movie idc i eat stuff like this upppp#EDIT; updates the post after reading ltk and checking if tricorner fit this desc#EDIT; added homunculus too because whilst technically he never actually enters anyones minds he does visualise them into the real world#so its the same end result of seeing a person's true thoughts and feelings. but a slightly different method to get there
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