#feeling kinda big here
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New underwear!
Don’t look at my pile of laundry
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KAEYA BIRTHDAY ??? ?? i love you mr alberich sir i love you oh so so so much.
uh dialogue for this one but more legible under the cut (and a messy ragbros page)
Klee: Kaeya! Come down here! Kaeya: Oh? heh. What is it, Spark Knight?
Klee: Happy Birthday! It is today? Right? I even double-checked with Albedo and everything but I don't know... Klee: It's a Calla Lily! You like those, right? Kaeya: I certainly do! Thank y- Klee: Oh. Klee: OK OK OK- Kaeya: Hm? Klee: Kaeya you have to promise to not tell Master Jean about this one! Kaeya: You can count on me to keep my lips sealed.
Klee: OK! Close your eyes- eye- and hold out your hands! Kaeya: Mhm! Klee: OK! You can open them! TA-DA~!
Klee: I made a bomb for you! It even has an eyepatch! He can look after you when I'm somewhere else. Take good care of him! Oh yeah- He explodes if you- Kaeya?
Kaeya: Thank you Klee! Thank you very much! Klee: You're VERY welcome Kaeya!
a lil ragbros too.... kaeya and his red siblings amirite (bursts into tears).. also i am so obsessed with chibi diluc saying "bring em in..."
#I LOVE YOU KAEYA#these were all drawn in the past two daysashhsdgg#i was originally planning on starting like at least a week in advance bc i wanted to do one big ambitious piece but that didnt end up happe#ing... instead he gets a little comic a bigger comic and a page and my undivided attention#genshin impact#kaeya alberich#kaeya#genshin impact kaeya#genshin kaeya#im putting em all in here f u#klee#diluc ragnvindr#ragbros#none of that kaeluc shit here alright thank you or go fuck off ok epic#my art#sona#these r all improvised. i went about the klee comic in the stupidest way possible bc apperantly i love making things hard for myself..#not like it was my fault- it was just supposed to be a concept for a finished piece and not turn into a little comic but i have no self con#rol clearly so now its here and i am jsut kinda sleepy sry#kaeya has been my genshin blorbo for over three years ok i needed to express a little of my feelings about him somehow#OK YAY ITS OFFICIALLY THE 30TH IN MY TIMEZONE SO I CAN POST THIS OK OK YEAH#HAPPY BDAY KAEYA AAAAAAAAAAAAA 😭💖💖💖#this entire post is just me sobbing over how much i adore him#is this the longest wall of notes from me yet.. idk but it might be#ok anyways i love kaeya a lot send me anything kaeya and i will love you forever and ever and i should really go to sleep now i think#... .kaeya 🥰🥰🥰
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I started drawing this next day after I finished Act 6
13 or so days and it's finished!
Main things are traditional and Loop's body was edited digitally after
Unedited it looks like this
I've been torn on how to do Loop's body for the entirety of lining, also
A bit sad the main lines are visible only as a wip, most of this thing is literally just a ton of sharp lines
I think it's also my first day of drawing, Loop is just a sketch here (feat. my leg)
I even finished the beans before it so they were a moral support, because if you let me things like this take a year
#fanart#my art#isat#isat fanart#in stars and time#isat loop#loop#traditional art#artists on tumblr#Phew#So anyway this was my way of figuring out my thoughts after finishing the game#I didn't even actually finish it with credits playing at that moment#This type of art is my therapy#And in a way literally how my personality works from big figures to small details of thinking about anything#It's really calming!#I won't tag paper figures but they're here#Like special guests#In any case the funniest thing was showing this to my English teacher and she was like 'wow this looks stressed' or something#Like she immediately looked at the lines and after I showed her my old Flowey drawing like this she was like#'oh it makes sense! This one looks calm but this one is clearly you not feeling good'#Because I was kinda#Like sitting there in the semi-park and feeling sick since morning before I started drawing this and slowly I got better#I already talked about this on my first 'big' isat thing - I needed to think a bit#And not think at the same time just literally letting myself sort stuff out#Like. I fell asleep at 6 am that day and woke up at 10 4 hours of sleep after playing full Act 5 and two hats stuff IS STRESSFUL#SUPER STRESSFUL! Like I felt like I was playing for 4 hours while sleeping#Anyway by the time I finished it aka today I'm feeling way better and I'm literally talking a walk right now#Touching grass as we speak#Anyway phew!#Now to that animatic that's plaguing my mind to draw it nowww
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feelin kinda sad so eating an obscene amount of pasta
#YukiPri rambles#it's nothing serious#just have had a stream of unfortunate disappointments#nothing major and each time i'm like well ok that could have been worse and i'm glad it wasn't#but the cumulative result is just me kinda feeling droopy inside despite trying to continue lookin chipper outside#'wilted' i think is best descriptor for me rn#trying to tell myself that retail therapy isn't the answer here#In case folks are curious#the disappointments are:#1) dad was in a car accident and no one was hurt but gave me a huge scare#2) was given a day off at work in exchange for working a weekend and was looking forward to both#but they asked me last minute nevermind come in instead and i had to cancel all the plans i'd made and couldn't reschedule#3) movie i wanted to see on said day off is no longer playing in local theaters so it's either convince mum to drive an hour or give up#4) had an afternoon tea planned with mum and her friends and was looking forward to it for a month and only eating out this month#had reservations and outfit picked out and everything#but then a few days before landlord scheduled repairs for that day and wouldn't listen when we said we had plans#so i stayed home so mum could go and i'm glad she could go but sad#5) went to work this morning and there'd been a flood in the office from a customer leaving the bathroom sink running#and the torrent of water came down on my desk specifically ruining all of my books/personal stuff#i got reimbursed but it's just really sad bc some of those things were free/gifts that i can't get back and i hate throwing out books#especially ones i never got to read but they were completely drenched through and unsalvageable...#6) had an outing planned this weekend i was really looking forward to but we probably can't go bc weather is bad#i think there were a few others but that's most of the big ones#i am wilted and just want to curl up and not move
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#petting him..Smiles#sorry for the lack of posts here as of late btw. kinda feeling unmotivated 💔#still will do my best to respond to asks as fast as I can though. Most of the time#wander over yonder#woy#wander#woy wander#the big job
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A redraw of an old thing because exam season is the only time i get creative energy ig
#but no fr i just came home from 2 consecutive exams. like consecutive as in one after the other in 2 hours#next week is all finals and theyre all like 2 hours 1 in the morning and 1 in the afternoon like bro#whatevs tho medical update THE MEDS ARE WORKING alhamdulilallah i feel im getting way more energy :)#2 years on immunosuppressants and at least 3 months of corticosteroids which means no salt :( BUT we are getting thru it#im cooking again :')#ok enough my life is not what you're here for. idk if cbeeduo at the end of 2023 *is* but idc#i just rly missed them yk and the vibes and the place i was in plus i have fun drawing them so suck it#i hope my good cbee mutuals enjoy this love yall#my art#dsmp fanart#cranboo#ctubbo#cbeeduo#fashion notes for the cool peeps still reading is i am dying on the hill that cranboo was decked in a 70s aunt wardrobe argue with the wall#also tubbo cowboy cus. like. look at him.#will probably draw tommy next i rly miss him. nothing big as always im a doodle kinda guy at heart#anyway xoxo love yall still here <33#fennec.art
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Osomatsu-san x Harimaware! Koinu The Chara Shop ( 2024 )
#i don't know anything about hari koinu but the art and poses here were too cute not to share#plus i'll always appreciate crossover stuff where they pair them w/ charas that share their seiyuu#i wonder if these are the character designs they're going with for s4 tho 🤔#it feels more in-line with s2 and the movie's character designs which i'm a big fan of so i'll be happy if that's the case#this also made me realize kara wears skinny jeans. of course he would. god.#the characters he's with are wolves too which is so fitting i love it#totty's art is kinda my fave tho. i adore their energy they're killing it#osmt#osomatsu-san#osomatsu#harimaware! koinu#osomatsu matsuno#karamatsu#karamatsu matsuno#choromatsu#choromatsu matsuno#ichimatsu#ichimatsu matsuno#jyushimatsu#jyushimatsu matsuno#todomatsu#todomatsu matsuno#official#transparents
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It's kind of a weird (not sure if good or bad or just neutral!) experience to realize that a lot of the personal headcanons I've written into my own writing have become well-known enough that they're treated as general fanon with a lot of people using them and not realizing that they, like, originated from a specific place rather than just being ambiently popular. Every once in a while I come across a fic where there's an AN that says something to the tune of, "Oh, I saw this popular headcanon that [insert something really specific from 666: Live On Air!] and wanted to[...]" without attributing it to me - or, most likely, even realizing that it came from me!
It's an interesting feeling! I think the times that actually bother me are when it's people that know they got the headcanon directly from me and choose not to credit me (or in one weird instance, credit me, then edit their stuff to bury the credit to be really hard to find for some reason - y'all, I do notice these things even when I don't comment on them).
I've been straight up plagiarized many times before. It's ranged from friends in RP groups stealing my characters because I wasn't using them often anymore, to more recently someone ripping out chunks of one of my Hazbin Hotel fics and rewriting it as their own. It's a uniquely horrible feeling, and I think it makes me sensitive to feeling uncredited as a result even when plagiarism isn't occuring. On the other hand, this is literally how headcanons evolve and I'm actually so fucking happy that specific things that I was outright nervous to post because I thought people would (and in a few cases, people did) react very poorly to them are now, like...fairly common fanon.
Anyway, I don't think it's wrong for people to carry forward headcanons to the point where they don't even know where they came from. I also think most likely some concepts became convergently popular when more than one person had the same thought! It's how fandoms work and I know for a fact I've done the same... but it does very much give me the warm and fuzzies when people that use my ideas do give a nod in my direction for where they got the inspiration! In return, I try to make a point to do the same.
#personal#my writing#“but here's MY take on it”#anyway it does kinda bother me when the specific headcanons get popular enough that people feel comfortable being casually dismissive#or insulting towards them the way people often are about “popular” things#without realizing it's a Specific Idea that came from a Specific Person#but it's not all that big of a deal and doesn't actually happen that often#best moments are when I am like “wow this thing I really like to see in fic sure is popular! :) I'm glad everyone seems to think the same!”#and one of my friends is like “bro YOU POPULARIZED IT”#oops! NO RAGRETS! MORE FOR ME!!!!!!!!#dear diary#anyway if I can wield the power of making fetch happen for ANYTHING it's everyone please write insecure beta Vox in your A/B/O fics >:)
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#stat regretevator#regretevator#regretevator fanart#my art#all alone#really love thinking realistically about how the characters feel about being in this endless loop they call the elevator#for stat specifically must have been horrific since her home got destroyed and got nowhere else to go other than here#and this elevator is so fucking weird; its so damn big and spacious as if it was meant to house several people for a LONGGGG trip loll#shes the only one who is actually scared paranoid and cautious in the game its so funny 😭#(forgot about bive for a second but shes not really paranoid about the gravity of her situation itself. thats just kinda her state of mind)#i wanna draw her experiencing these random levels and events as well as the other npcs#especially folly eheheh ...
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I got- I can't!
Imagine being 15, you've grown up your whole life with this one belief in this one God and you were told you were Chosen by Him, for Him. And you're 15. You believe so fully in the spirit of your religion, not necessarily the word, that you want to go to a non-religious school to try and help other kids maybe find your God because you genuinely believe that could be helpful to some of them, because it's all you know, and it's helped other strangers (human trafficking victims she helped in the black pit before) so why not other kids her age? You're 15 and all you can think about is helping others. And you start thinking about your religion, and reading books, and asking questions and you come to the conclusion that maybe your God and His Father aren't actually all that great. Maybe the church you're in has done some really bad things that you can't possibly make up for. Maybe that church is still doing bad things. And then you find out your family is actually in a cult for that God, not just part of the normal church, and you suddenly have to undo all the cult shit in your brain you were raised with, while that cult stuff you know about is actually useful to your friends, like having that knowledge is helpful for them! You're 15 and you stop going home. You have no real adult supervision or carer, just your other 15 year old friends.
Imagine you're 16, you're gay and figuring that out on top of navigating your first full romantic relationship and being the sole creator and cleric to a new God that you honestly find to be very two dimensional and empty. You're on a quest to find an evil being and stop them. You nearly die. Your friends nearly die. You're 16. You're 16 and feel something calling out to you, you know it's divine because you've felt that sort of pull before, but you've never felt one like this. You find memories and hints and pieces and you figure out that the evil being you have to stop, isn't evil, she's just hurting. She's hurt and She's a God. She's your God, and she's so happy to see you, and she has so many ideas, and so many hopes.
You're 17. You've spent your rest time (summer vacation) tearing across the world chasing down and defeating another evil thing that you and your friends accidentally released in the first place. Your God is with you, you have no time for Her. No time for anything but trying to survive and stay sane. You know She's disappointed in you, but you're one person -ONE PERSON- and you're 17. You missed your birthday. again. You've saved the world; again. You're so fucking tired -like always. You're Chosen, and alone, and have no idea what to do with your life, let alone your God. You aren't very good at school, but you go to every class. You're drowning as you try to rewrite your understanding of the world from what you grew up with, having no idea how to do anything without a book and godly hand to guide you. You only ever followed before, your new God is demanding you Lead. You don't know how. You're only 17. You see your horrible, abusive parents spitting abuse and racist rhetoric at your baby brother, who you haven't seen in two years, on the front steps to your school and for the first time ever you are filled with righteous fury. Your God answers your call, not knowing what you need but so eager to help, eager for your attention, she starts talking to you but you're busy -why can't she understand that you're fucking busy? trying to not die, trying to be safe, trying to keep your friends alive, trying to navigate a world that hates you, you're 17 and you're busy goddammit just wait!- and she snaps back at you and flees. The next time you see Her, maybe an hour later, She's got a creature with Her that nearly destroyed you and your friends last year sitting in her lap, so smug to see you again.
You're 17- no, 16- no, 15 years old and you're expected to build and carry the world on your shoulders, Chosen from birth, raised a lamb to follow a Shepard, not to be followed behind. You have no one and nothing and everyone expects everything and you can't back up, you can't pause because if you do someone dies and doesn't come back. You have to be a hero, a chosen, a saint. The steps behind you crumble to dust with each step you take forward and the new one is already cracking under your weight. There are only wrong choices. There's no hand reaching for you. God, you were taught, will save and guide you. God knows best. Why is your God looking to you, a mortal human, to be saved, raised and guided? You're a child.
You're just a child.
You just want to go home, wherever that is. You thought it was your God, but She's not exactly helping you out either, is She? She's just disappointed. Like everyone else. Like you.
You're 17. You think it would have been better to never do any of this. It would have been easier to stay, blind and naive. Sometimes you think you should have stayed in heaven. Sometimes you think about the God you killed by not being good enough for it. Sometimes you lay on the floor and stare at the ceiling and pretend you don't exist for awhile. Sometimes you work your body so hard you forget it's there and your mind shuts up and you exist without being you. Sometimes you wish you never asked any questions or read any books. You're 17, but sometimes you wish you were 15, with no idea yet.
You're 17. You wish you were good enough.
#dimension 20#kristen applebees#fantasy high junior year#fhjy#d20 fhjy#fhjy spoilers#dimension 20 fhjy#dimension 20 fantasy high#d20 fantasy high#dimension 20 spoilers#words#can you tell my religious trauma is popping off?#I have big feelings about kristen#she's just a kid man leave her alone#it's not fair for a god to expect a child to be able to perform what many adults do over many years in just the span of a few months#yeah it's not fair cassandra has had the lot of getting a child for her only cleric but like#she reached out to and accepted kristen! she the God here! it's like when a grown adult expects a toddler to know to not run into a road#without being taught. that's a baby#she's gonna run into the road many times until someone takes her hand and kindly teaches her to not#kristen litterally needs some kinda reliable help. she knows there's something wrong and that she's fucking it up she just literally doesn'#know how to fix it! someone help her!!!#fantasy high
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-Thank you to everyone who is still here liking, commenting and reblogging my content, even though I'm not posting much “fandom stuff” anymore, you're still here! And I really appreciate that.. (and that makes me so happy, that as I showed in the “comic”, it moves me, so- thank you, really!!) :]💛
Also- a tip: there are also many other blogs that don't post fandom stuff, but when they do, they get more likes and reblogs than the original/other content.. So also give love to those people who have your original content, reblog, like, comment, because that's what they need! Recognition for your original content! And I know you won't regret it, and it won't hurt you to do what I said! In fact, you will be doing good and giving such love that many wanted and deserve.
A big kiss/p and a hug! Even for those who only like it when I post fandom stuff, I still love you so much, and I won't stop making this type of content, ok? I just want to give more voice to what I have to give as original, because that's what makes me happy and well ^^
-Melissa, Designer.
#ok- I don't even know where to start/say more qioqbsksb#but I wanted to thank you again for everything you've been doing for me. it's really nice of you to still be here with me.#even though I'm not posting something that you “love with passion”. you're still here. and that's really cool!#and I know I've said this a thousand times. but always know that I love you very much and that you are very special!#I'm very happy to wake up tomorrow. look at my notifications and there it is: always a comment or reblog.#and I wanted to pass on this feeling of happiness to others too.#I want them to feel loved too and to have people who also appreciate their work!#so please. it's not too much to ask. give love and affection to these blogs that have/make original content.#make sure they also have recognition. more desire to create content and keep the blog alive!#and yeah.. a big hug and I hope you have a wonderful day/night💛#i'm mel and this is my blog✌️#my art blog#art#my art#my art <3#art mel#my art style#mel designer#melissa designer#my oc character#comicart#comic#kinda?#thanks you guys#💛
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OKAY so I am re-listening to "Death and The Queen" again and I am having Thoughts™.
I can't find any info about when this drama takes place continuity-wise, but my personal placement would be after "Planet of The Ood" (4x3) and before "The Sontaran Stratagem" (4x4) because 4x4-4x6 take place directly following each other with Donna stating at the end of 4x6 that she plans to travel with the Doctor forever. Donna's determination to continue traveling w him is in keeping with the conclusion of Death and The Queen, where she comes to the decision that the Doctor IS her "happily ever after," as it were. Placing the drama after "Fires of Pompeii" and "Planet of The Ood" also makes sense with Donna's desire in the audio drama to have a break from "the extraordinary" of traveling with the Doctor (specifically, horrific death and destruction,) which adds understandable context to her seemingly being so willing to leave the Doctor after searching for him for so long.
(Don't talk to me about the ending of Forest of The Dead. It's unlikely Donna would have left the Doctor even if she found Lee. Donna's desire to confirm whether Lee was real could be easily contextualized by her wanting to know how much of her experiences inside CAL were a fabrication, and what the supposed "perfect husband" persona would have said about her if it was drawn from her own mind. Also it was written by Moffatt so it shouldn't count anyway.)
ANyway, what I actually wanted to talk about. Notably, considerable emphasis is placed on Donna enjoying her role as Queen and especially caring for her subjects and having power to help people. A greater amount of text is dedicated to her talking about how as Queen she can care for her subjects than her love for Rudolph, even before the reveal that he is human(?) trash. Her attachment to the role of Queen that marrying Rudolph will grant her is established to be largely based upon her passion for helping people rather than luxuries associated with rank, especially in view of the montage of how royal life on Gorotainia is not as glamorous as she hoped but is still enthralled by being Queen. Later in the story, when danger has appeared, her main role in the story is sacrificing and taking the lead to protect her subjects.
Notably, when things start going downhill and Rudolph starts talking to her about the difficult choices that he must make as royalty she comments that Rudolph is “just like HIM” (the Doctor) and that she went with Rudolph to escape these darker aspects of her travels with the Doctor, specifically the hard choices that go with the role the Doctor plays in the universe (while she doesn’t connect these concepts directly, these two statements are placed very close to one another textually.)
Only when her relationship with Rudolph and role as Queen seems like it will involve some of the same dark choices that her travels with Doctor did does Donna decide she doesn’t want to be involved anymore, which is quickly reversed when she finds out she needs to become Queen in order to protect her people. (I love Donna. In case you can’t tell.)
The narrative has established that a large part of Donna’s attachment to her relationship with Rudolph is potential authority to help and guide people, and that her main interest in pursuing a life with Rudolph rather than her travels with the Doctor was her perception that her role as Queen of Gorotainia would not involve the same death and destruction she has seen with the Doctor. Perfectly understandable after experiencing something like Pompeii.
Donna’s compassion and empathy have been essential components of her character since her introduction, with her wanting to protect the Doctor despite being irritated with him and feeling sorrow for the children of a Rancoss that wanted her to be eaten in “The Runaway Bride”, her taking the time to mention Stacy in “Partners In Crime,” and literally everything in “Fires of Pompeii” and “Planet of The Ood’. Donna has always taken the time and the energy to think of others and work to protect them, even this early in her run. In view of how deeply she feels the pain of others, it is understandable that she would find the idea of a world where she could help others from a position of power without all of the death and chaos and destruction appealing, and her outrage at Rudolph for once again putting her in a position where she has to witness (and potentially be responsible for) terrible things happening to innocent people is believable. He proves that being a Gorotainian royal is like being the Last of The Time Lords. On a smaller scale, sure, but still.
So the text (and Donna) have set up the idea of Rudolph being similar to the Doctor in role, so what is the difference? Rudolph doesn’t much care about people. He is willing to sacrifice his own people quite coldly.
The Doctor does care about people. How good of a person he is, or how good of a job he does caring for people is up for debate, but he cares.
Which all leads me to this quote from “Beautiful Chaos,” that I cannot believe is cannon and real and published.
Why does Donna love the Doctor?
"I wish you could see what I see. We've been to places, to worlds, to futures and pasts you could only dream about. I think half of them I dreamed up because they can't be real. But they are. And everywhere we go, we make a difference. We put things right, we make people happier. That's what the Doctor is all about. He finds a way for the universe to make sense. And I love him for it.”
Donna Noble wants to make a difference. No matter where she goes, she cannot escape the death and pain and suffering and chaos and nonsense that is the universe, and she can’t help but want to help. And right there beside her, the Doctor is working to put things right too. And she loves him for it.
We have this entire drama dedicated to Donna wanting to make a difference, while also escaping the darkness of the universe, and she learns she can’t. There are no happily ever afters.
Except with the Doctor.
I have so many feelings guys.
#tendonna#ten/donna#feel free to interpret this as platonic if u want but this is why I love them as a couple okay#they are whole independent people who learn that if they stand together they don't have to carry the whole world on their shoulders#they understand each other and they have goals that are fundamentally compatible#how is that not sexy#ten x donna#doctor/donna#doctor x donna#donna noble#this is a Donna Noble Stan blog#tenth doctor#big finish doctor who#death and the queen#doctor who#not me being afraid my old English lit teacher will find my tumblr and give me notes on this#1K word essay lets go lads#dw meta#THE TENDONNA THESIS LIVES#I AM FERAL FOR THEM#GRASPS UR SHOULDERS AND SHAKES VIOLENTLY “THE POTENTIAL!!!!!”#okay so maybe Rudolph kinda cares but he has the spine of a wet noodle#not sure if any Rudolph stans are hiding out here tho#not gonna bash any other ships here but#is this not substantive??? Is this not compelling???
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wanted 2 compare my old joffrey design w the way I draw him now...not much changed besides the fringe but I feel like he has a different vibe now idk
#my art#asoiaf#1st version is a bit more book accurate ig but I like the other one better so idc#I mean besides the fringe. ignore that#I kinda miss the fringe actually...I dont miss drawing it bc it was annoying but. it was my brand...#this feels like what the character actually looks like vs the yaoified version but in reverse#I think I drew his forehead to big here ops. I dont feel like fixing it#he has his father's receeding hairline 🥺
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actually i'm still thinking about the moral orel finale.
he has a cross on his wall. do you know how much i think about that bc it's a lot.
a lot of stories ((auto)biographical or fictional) centering escape from abusive/fundamentalist christianity result in the lead characters leaving behind christianity entirely. and that makes complete sense! people often grow disillusioned with the associated systems and beliefs, and when it was something used to hurt them or something so inseparable from their abuse that they can't engage with it without hurting, it makes total sense that they would disengage entirely. and sometimes they just figure out that they don't really believe in god/a christian god/etc. a healthy deconstruction process can sometimes look like becoming an atheist or converting to another religion. it's all case by case. (note: i'm sure this happens with other religions as well, i'm just most familiar with christian versions of this phenomenon).
but in orel's case, his faith was one of the few things that actually brought him comfort and joy. he loved god, y'know? genuinely. and he felt loved by god and supported by him when he had no one else. and the abuses he faced were in how the people in his life twisted religion to control others, to run away from themselves, to shield them from others, etc. and often, orel's conflicts with how they acted out christianity come as a direct result of his purer understanding of god/jesus/whatever ("aren't we supposed to be like this/do that?" met with an adult's excuse for their own behavior or the fastest way they could think of to get orel to leave them alone (i.e. orel saying i thought we weren't supposed to lie? and clay saying uhhh it doesn't count if you're lying to yourself)). the little guy played catch with god instead of his dad, like.. his faith was real, and his love was real. and i think it's a good choice to have orel maintain something that was so important to him and such a grounding, comforting force in the midst of. All That Stuff Moralton Was Up To/Put Him Through. being all about jesus was not the problem, in orel's case.
and i know i'm mostly assuming that orel ended up in a healthier, less rigid version of christianity, but i feel like that's something that was hinted at a lot through the series, that that's the direction he'd go. when he meditates during the prayer bee and accepts stephanie's different way to communicate, incorporating elements of buddhism into his faith; when he has his I AM A CHURCH breakdown (removing himself from the institution and realizing he can be like,, the center of his own faith? taking a more individualistic approach? but Truly Going Through It at the same time), his acceptance (...sometimes) of those who are different from him and condemned by the adults of moralton (stephanie (lesbian icon stephanie my beloved), christina (who's like. just a slightly different form of fundie protestant from him), dr chosenberg (the jewish doctor from otherton in holy visage)). his track record on this isn't perfect, but it gets better as orel starts maturing and picking up on what an absolute shitfest moralton is. it's all ways of questioning the things he's been taught, and it makes sense that it would lead to a bigger questioning as he puts those pieces together more. anyway i think part of his growth is weeding out all the lost commandments of his upbringing and focusing on what faith means to him, and what he thinks it should mean. how he wants to see the world and how he wants to treat people and what he thinks is okay and right, and looking to religion for guidance in that, not as like. a way to justify hurting those he's afraid or resentful of, as his role models did.
he's coming to his own conclusions rather than obediently, unquestioningly taking in what others say. but he's still listening to pick out the parts that make sense to him. (edit/note: and it's his compassion and his faith that are the primary motivations for this questioning and revisal process, both of individual cases and, eventually, the final boss that is christianity.) it makes perfect sense as the conclusion to his character arc and it fits the overall approach of the show far better. it's good is what i'm saying.
and i think it's important to show that kind of ending, because that's a pretty common and equally valid result of deconstruction. and i think it cements the show's treatment of christianity as something that's often (and maybe even easily) exploited, but not something inherently bad. something that can be very positive, even. guys he even has a dog he's not afraid of loving anymore. he's not afraid of loving anyone more than jesus and i don't think it's because he loves this dog less than bartholomew (though he was probably far more desperate for healthy affection and companionship when he was younger). i think it's because he figures god would want him to love that dog. he's choosing to believe that god would want him to love and to be happy and to be kind. he's not afraid of loving in the wrong way do you know how cool that is he's taking back control he's taking back something he loves from his abusers im so normal
#i had a really big fundie snark phase a year or two ago so that's part of like. this. but im still not used to actually talking about#religious stuff so if it reads kinda awkwardly uhh forgive me orz idk#maybe it sounds dumb but i like that the message isn't 'religion is evil'. it easily could have been. but i think the show's points about#how fundie wasp culture in particular treats christianity and itself and others would be less poignant if they were like. and jesus sucks#btw >:] like. this feels more nuanced to me. i guess there's probably a way to maintain that nuance with an ultimately anti-christian#piece of media but i think it'd be like. wayy harder and it's difficult for me to imagine that bc i think a lot of it would bleed out into#the tone. + why focus on only These christians when They're All also bad? so you'd get jokes about them in general#and i think that's kinda less funny than orel and doughy screaming and running from catholics lsdkjfldksj#i think the specificity makes it more unique and compelling as comedy and as commentary. but that's just me#like moralton represents a very particular kind of christian community (namely a middle class fundie wasp nest)#you're not gonna be able to get in the weeds as much if you're laughing at/criticizing all christians. but they accomplish it so thoroughly#and WELL in morel and i think that's because it chose a smaller target it can get to dissect more intimately. anyway#moral orel#orel puppington#(OH also when i say wasp here i mean WASP the acronym. as in white anglo-saxon protestsant. in case the term's new to anyone <3)#maybe it's also relevant to say that i'm kindaaaaaaaa loosely vaguely nonspecifically christian. so there's my bias revealed#i was never raised like orel but i like to think i get some of what's going on in there y'know. in that big autistic head of his#but it's not like i can't handle anti-christian/anti-religious media/takes. i'm a big boy and also i v much get why it's out there yknow#christianity in specific has a lot of blood on its hands from its own members and from outsiders and people have a right to hate it for tha#but religion in all its forms can be positive and i appreciate the nuance. like i've said around 20 times. yeah :) <3#(<- fighting for my life to explain things even though my one job is to be the explainer)
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iiiiit was my birthdaaaayyy
#abt a couple hours ago...couldnt finish this birthday doodl in time hah#buuut anywayyy im no longer neurodivergent n a minor now im nd and a mayor (im 18 now yaaay (scary))#honestly it feels kinda weird i tough 4 a long time this moment would never come and that i would die or smth when it happened#buut nothing happened im still here still in my house still have to study 4 my exams n im okay!#still a bit scary though but ig now that it already happened its not much of a big deal anymore#aanyway went 2 see wild robot 4 de second time yesterday that was very fun!#personal#ville doodl
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not to be myself on main but im still here
#snap chats#sorry not sorry im still obsessed with how big he is. this is peak mags body to me just huge as fuck and solid like a freight train#i hate that charas follow where you're looking because now i feel especially filthy like STOP. i AM looking at your ass i dont wanna hear i#this is why i cant stream me playing 90% of the time i will Not So Subtly just be checking out the modeling of his ass#it aint even a perverse thing im just genuinely mesmerized by the shape and the definition ..... the sculpt ...#i am a very tactile person i love texture and feeling grooves and all that so OF COURSE im gonna be here Forever#yeah they'll never tear this skin away from me. i need to grab him#there is no bounce his ass isnt even big it is hard as steel but idc. let me grab#'snap youve lost the plot' i fear i never had it to begin with the release of this game just made me worse#my favorite thing mags does sometimes is he'll like. raise his leg like some kinda fuckin horse while flourishing his magnetism#for what reason did yall have him do that. im obsessed I Repeat he's like a giant horse to me#ok im gonna stare at him for another half hour like some sicko bye#maybe ill play the game again later but i wanna work on stuff first
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