#failed cooking

[tetsunabouquet]

Tetsuna's Adult Cooking 101 I love Krazy Poppin' Cooking even as an adult, okay? I bought a sushi package in Amsterdam (one of my favorites) and my mom started pushing me again to try to prepare it with vodka instead of water. Because it is her birthday, I decided to do it. I did it with what was meant to be the caviar first, but unfortunately it doesn't becomes gooey with vodka at all. Experiment failed. I ended up using it instead of the brown sauce as I prepared the remaining package with water as it should. I am now about to make cute sushi out of my vodka-candy abomination. Wish me good luck.

[mari-lair]

cook acquired!

[eriochromatic]

Agares, duke of hell

based on that demonology post noting the similarities between buggy and agares...he’s gonna crown luffy pirate king frfr

[a-most-beloved-fool]

spirk using telepathy to keep each other alive. kirk, desperate, psy-null and untrained, reaching clumsily into spock's dying mind and pulling, dragging spock's essence into himself, wrenching him forceably from the very jaws of death and holding him there through sheer strength of will, saying you can't die, i won't let you, you can't leave me, i need you, and binding him to life and to himself until it's impossible to fully separate them. spock, more skilled, carefully managing each one of kirk's vital signs - keeping his heart beating steady, his lungs drawing breath, his temperature within a safe range, all while suppressing kirk's pain, and at the same trying, vainly, to keep their minds from tying themselves inexorably together, but they're pressed too close and he can't, and he hopes that kirk will forgive him, for bonding them like this (he will, of course he will), but the alternative, letting kirk die, was - unthinkable.

[wantart1]

Guys guess who loves minecraft and is a loser? (Hint: It's me) I love Petra. Pretty woman please, please save me pretty woman.

I hate them so much guys I hope they explode soon /j

[pirateprincessjess]

How do you get this far into adulthood *on the internet* without basic knowledge on how to cook are you stupid on purpose

Dang, I wouldn’t say that I’m stupid just because I didn’t know one thing.

My parents hate vegetables. Every meal I had at home growing up was either a frozen box meal or a from a can. My family didn’t teach me how to cook. They taught me how to heat up a frozen meal.

Now I absolutely love vegetables, and I love cooking. Unfortunately it’s hard to learn basic cooking skills as an adult because I tend to get called stupid when I admit that I don’t know something.

[cjskribblez]

lotr boat boys.... save me lotr boat boys....

au by @terracottakore ! GO LOOK AT IT

[shadowsegregious]

not. the greatest cook (still comic under cut <3)

[yi3248]

him and his eyes <3

[patrothestupid]

bro overcooked the egg

[romatito]

more 🏳️‍⚧️🇪🇸 bc shes taken control of Every part of my mind. miss spagna............ i have feelings for u

[cybershock24601]

I'm sure someone else has already thought of this but I'm so convinced that modern Illario would be one those guys that make those thirst trap cooking videos - you know the ones - and starts building a decent following of horny older women (like Zara Renata) only for his fame to be completely eclipsed by some poorly shot and poorly edited video Rook posted of Lucanis cooking going insanely viral out of nowhere.

The video is shot in Rook's kitchen and it's Lucanis from the chin down, sleeves rolled up, and in a goofy apron (because Rook only owns goofy aprons) explaining in his nice soothing voice how to cook some dish and it's got some stupid caption like "when your man is teaching you how to cook so you don't die of malnutrition😍" that was intended just for their friends to see because it's clearly a silly candid video.

Probably no one would have seen it if there weren't some sort of algorithm containment breach that likely came from Ma Harding who wants to know what Lucanis is cooking. Rook answers and then just ignores their phone because they're still getting their cooking lesson and need to pay attention. Rook also doesn't keep notifications on or use social media much because they don't even notice the short little video they posted blowing up out of nowhere where half the comments are about how good the food looks and the other half about how good Lucanis looks.

Illario notices though and absolutely loses it because how come some stupid video of his cousin cooking doing so much better then the many videos Illario puts a ton of time and effort into making?! Illario starts giving Lucanis the cold shoulder and Lucanis is just so confused about what Illario's problem is this time and corners him because he's being ridiculous and Illario just goes "You know exactly what this about" and Lucanis who really, really doesn't know replies "Illario I have no idea what you're talking about" and Illario just shows him the video and Lucanis has no idea why he is so upset until he sees just how many likes and comments on the silly little video Rook took of him the other day. Lucanis is honestly a little disturbed by just how horny the comments are while Illario is telling Lucanis that he is not going to upstage him this time, just wait Lucanis, Illario is going to prove he's the better cooking content creator and dramatically walks away.

At the very least this is explaining those weird comments Taash and Harding had been making for the past week. Lucanis texts Rook about the video after this and Rook is super surprised that so many people had seen it and wants to know if they should take it down but its the internet so it's too late for that. Rook does get super curious about what Illario meant about making his own cooking videos and tracks down his account and almost dies of cringe when they start watching them. Those videos are definitely getting sent to the group chat where everyone proceeds to start roasting Illario over them and Lucanis is left desperately hoping he gets some sudden memory loss because he really wishes he had never seen his cousin try so desperately hard to be sexy or molest food like that.

[gomzdrawfr]

Fish talk.

Price likes rainbow trout that he cooked himself in garlic and butter in a ration tin over an open fire. Nothin better than trout you caught, gutted and cooked yourself on the river bank. Bonus points for a bottle of something cold and hoppy to go along with it while he eats it on the river bank, still wearing his wellies and waders.

For Nik, it's calamari and grilled sea bass with a glass of white wine, maybe a sauvignon blanc from France, in some swanky hotel on the Adriatic coast. Just sitting there in beige chinos, an open shirt and bare feet, skin still warm from where he was basking in the sun all day, not even checking the bill before he pays for it.

Fish recipes by the one and only, now visualised (somewhat) hehe

bonus of my reaction:

[sweetnnaivete]

punk rock harry james potter with his indie mum and goth godfather, then his dad with the most basic style to ever exist

[charlott2n]

the sentiment gets thrown around a lot but the way i literally didnt ask to be born and have to get a job and contribute to society just to survive lol

[youcalledsworld]

DP x DC prompt

The Justice League failed and the earth will blow in 8 minutes. They can't evacuate everyone on the planet, they are all tired and can barely move.

In a last ditch effort John and Zatanna call upon the King of the Infinite Realms for help.

Danny said he can't stop the planet from blowing up and the Justice League sighed in defeat. But then he goes on to say that he can save everyone on earth.

The League wondered how he could. So he told them he'll just move the entire population of earth to a different earth so similar to theirs it would be extremely difficult to tell the difference.

He tells them the only difference is that on that earth the Heroes and even the Villains failed to stop a big evil from turning everyone including animal into dust.

And after he finishes relocating everyone to the different earth he will then swap the earth's around so that they remain in their original universe.

For his payment Danny told them that he will take everything valuable from the earth that's about to explode. That means precious metals, vehicles, mansions, weapons, artwork, magical artifacts, villains and heroes equipment, he will take everything.