#faded love
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i loved you. you loved me too. i had more love to give you didn’t; i can not conjure a more poetic tragedy
#lost love#scribbledcornerwriters#sad thoughts#poetblr#spilled thoughts#short poem#past friendship#sad poem#og writing#lost friendship#faded love#poetry#poetic#not enough#dark academia#melodramatic#falling out of love#poems
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Pulling at heartstrings
those mementoes of the past
outlasting the love
that only they represent
when everything else faded.
.
D W Eldred
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#love this song#love this album#elvis presley#elvis history#elvis music#faded love#elvis albums#elvis country#elvis#70s elvis#elvis the king#Spotify
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Masterpieces
Lover, Is it because i was left to dry? My outer shell is hardened and hard to work with, i know. However, i promise all i need is some softening, warmth and water.
Lover, you were so proud to work with my clay once, so proud to run your hands over me and call me your masterpiece. You sculpt something else now. Another project.
You sculpt her.
I watch as you do. You pour your blood, sweat and tears into her making process. You pay so much attention to every detail in her. You fired her, glazed her with such concentration. Is she your masterpiece now? You never spent such time with me. My lover, my sculptor, my devoted one, why am i no longer your muse? Why have you abandoned me so? Even if you did fire me, would it be so you could erase each place you so carefully caressed me, to forget it all? Would it be to permanently etch the mistakes you made in me as a reminder that you could do better? Do i serve as a statue of shame to you?
I feel shattered lover, please hold my shards one last time. Please don't throw me away.
#shattered#clay#spilled heart#late night thoughts#spilled thoughts#poetry#sad poetry#kinda bittersweet#please love me#masterpiece#creation and destruction#hold me#faded love#please don't forget me#i loved you#im bored#love is dead#devotion is dead#know that i loved you#we could have been so good together#i would have done anything for you#shitty writing#shitty poetry#dumb poetry
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The Loss Of My Life #111
In your presence, yet feeling so alone,
Lost the love I once knew, heart turned to stone.
The person I fell for, now just a ghost,
A mere shadow of what I loved the most.
Every day, I see you, but you're not there,
Missing the warmth, the love that we used to share.
A shell of who you were, memories remain,
Echoes of the past, causing heartache and pain.
I hold onto the moments, the love we once had,
But it slips through my fingers, fades and turns sad.
Longing for the connection, the bond we once knew,
Hoping that somehow, our love will renew.
I'm with you, yet feeling so far apart,
Clutching to memories, holding them close to my heart.
Yearning for the one I fell in love with before,
Praying that love will find us once more.
Yours Faithfully🌻
#midnitetears#tumblr thoughts#spilled writing#spilled thoughts#love#writers and poets#poetry#tumblr#orginal post#blazed#brokenness#the lose of my life#tloml#spilled poetry#lonely hearted#my love#faded love#blown away#missing you#yours faithfully 🌻#the loss of my life
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They don’t know anything about us
#old love#tell me you love me#i miss you#couples#love quotes#breakup#i love you#pinterest#pleasecanwegoback#are you even real#areyouthereanymore#they can suck it#us against the world#angst#faded love#yourestillinsidemyhead
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i'll always be there to bring you back
#kcd2#hansry#yes them again#i promise i'll get back to oc stuff after this#but i'll probably revisit them again soon enough#i want to draw some other characters from the game too#i love basically the whole cast#there's no wlw but i can make some#rosa gives me girl kisser vibes#it's been ages since i drew a horse#my horsegirl origins buff is fading
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RELEASE THE DA2 VARRIC ROMANCE ENDING BIOWARE
#i told yall ive been in varrichawke hell recently#i found out he was a planned romance or at least ending sort of and now im seeing my hawke from a whole new perspective#like its all coming together...i imagine they truly fall in love during inq after the fade but idk#this is my garrusxshep but for dragon age ok#please dont kill varric in veilguard i will cry :(#dragon age 2#da2#daii#female hawke#varric#varric tethras#marian hawke#dragonage#bioware#da#this was inspired by a few fanfics#cassandra pentaghast#cass#seeker#femhawke#art#drawing#my art#sorry for the drawing inconcitencies#lol#varrichawke#dragon age#dragon age veilguard
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If you saw the previous post no you didn't I had to correct some things
The second part of my previous Inquisition post.
#Anders#anders dragon age#Marian Hawke#Handers#Dragon Age#da2#dai#As I said I promise I'll stop spamming the anders tag soon#not today though probably not tomorrow either#bear with me I love him and classes start in March#I have so many fanarts planned#okay I'll shut up now#my art#anyway I was planning on leaving my hawke in the Fade#but I was weak and I couldn't#I couldn't make varric suffer either and I took him with me to the fade too so
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PLEASE GIVE US MORE PAPA SOLAS I BEG YOU, MY LIFE WILL BE YOURS!!!!
Your wish is my command, dearest anon
#kinda similar to the last one I know#I’m just emo about solas carrying his sleeping child through the fade#solavellan#solas#dragon age#my art#might fix this one up a bit at some point#kinda like it more than the other#I also love giving solas cartoonishly big fur pelts#makes me happy
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BBC Merlin & Text Posts (18/?)
#honestly guys this might be my swan song. I can feel my merlin special interest fading#its been a very good 3 years. merlin will always have a special place in my heart#but i haven't been posting as much merlin stuff as I get more into sherlock holmes and star trek#of course I'm not saying goodbye. I'm just not as active on here anymore#peace and love xx#bbc merlin#merlin#merthur#morgana pendragon#merlin memes#merlin text posts tag
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Tinashe - Faded Love (Vertical Video) ft. Future
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And if I said Lucanis definitely thought Rook was dead? And if I said he gave up the second Solas appeared instead of Rook? And if I said the only thing keeping him alive those weeks Rook was gone was Spite and the thought that if he waited long enough for the others to get over this delusional idea that Rook was coming back he might just get a shot at Solas? Might just be able to die taking revenge for the love of his life? And if I said he refused to listen to the others telling him they weren't gone because if he allowed himself even a little bit of hope the pain if it wasn't true would be worse than what he could handle without going insane? And if I said he gave up because not giving up was more than he was capable of after everything he'd endured? If I said Rook was the only bright spot he had in his life and they got taken away? What then? What would happen if I said all that?
#good thing i didn't say any of it#but yeah when rook popped back out of the fade lucanis was in a state of shock#because he gave up#not because he doesnt love rook or doesnt believe in them#but because that was what finally broke him#the ossuary caterina illario ghilannain weisshaupt#he could handle all of that#but rook dying? he couldnt take that#lucanis dellamorte#rook dragon age#rookanis#but honestly this is friend rook as well#rook x lucanis#dragon age#dragon age the veilguard#datv#cora amell
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locked onto you⭑.ᐟ
what happens when your outfit is just a tad bit revealing?・suggestive content below! everything is mostly implied, sorry i'm too nervous to write actual smut. minors please don’t interact!!

˙ . ꒷ 🤍. 𖦹˙— a/n: sorry if this is a bit ooc, i haven’t written anything in so long that the original concept of this (it was supposed to be like revealing halloween costume) long passed AND this paragraph has been rewritten thrice. i struggled with these so bad if i’m honest bc i wrote half of it while being half asleep and my notes were sOOO BAD. i hope you enjoy nonetheless!! i love you all mwah
any pov but mentions of reader in a dress・not proofread
⌗ rafayel ⭑.ᐟ
“did my bodyguard get flushed down the drain or something? what’s taking you so long?” rafayel whined, shaking the doorknob impatiently. you brushed him off, regretfully staring at the mirror. the model in the ad wasn’t this exposed… right? you sighed, running your hands down your outfit, in hopes that you could make it just cover a bit more of you. “hellooo?” he continued to pout.
“okay okay.. stop your whining! i’m coming out.” you replied defeated. there was nothing more you could do. you had to face him, you were nearly running out of time. you slowly slipped out of the bathroom, meeting rafayel’s gaze. you both stayed silent, staring at each other. his ears and parts of his face shifted into a bright red hue. "weren’t you just in a hurry to go? why are you just standing here?" you teased, crossing your arms.
"well, maybe can just skip-"
"you're seriously not suggesting we cancel last minute, right?" you interrupted. “especially since this exhibition is for you specifically. you can’t just cancel! it’d look bad on both of our parts.” you continued lecturing him. you ushered him along.
on the way to the party, you noticed how handsy he was with you. especially when the driver tried to make conversation with you. rafayel pouted, leaning against you. his fingers brushed against your thighs at the very moment you arrived at the venue. you gave him a glance as you got out. he wasn’t this open with pda usually. there was something… off.
thomas catches you two up on the exhibition. as he does, rafayel is absolutely not listening. his attention is on a strand of your hair. he gently toys with it. you smile and nod in response to thomas, ushering rafayel along. “hey. earth to rafayel? c’mon you need to focus on. potential clients can approach at any moment!” you whispered to him. he deeply sighed before pouting at you. you opened your mouth to lecture him more but before you got a world out… people started approaching.
one person became two. two people became five. and so on. “mhm. oh! actually, i have to meet with my manager for a moment. excuse me. miss bodyguard? will you escort me?” rafayel quickly smiled. you squinted your eyes at him for a moment before accepting. wasn’t like you had a choice. rafayel led the way, taking you to an empty part of the venue. it was separated from rafayel’s exhibit. he sat down on a bench, letting out a soft sigh. you stood in front of him, crossing your arms.
“rafayel, what are we-“
he pulled you closer to him. he leaned his head against your stomach, looking up at you. you felt your face start to flush. “i just want a moment alone with you. you’re too distracting in that dress.” you’re head started to buzzed from the compliment. not to mention how close he was. you felt his hands rest on your lower back as he continued to lean against you.
“we really should get going..” you uttered, placing a hand on his arm. you know you should push him away, but you couldn’t find the strength in you. he whined.
“please?” he asked. “it’s hard to focus. help me…” he pouted. he leaned back on the bench, inviting you to sit on his lap. you ran your hand through your hair as you looked down at him. as much as you should’ve just said no. you gave in, sitting on his lap.
“you’re lucky you’re so alluring, idiot.” you whispered, kissing his neck. “now be a good boy and stay quiet.”
⌗ sylus ⭑.ᐟ
“didn’t take you for being someone who likes to be fashionably late.” sylus said from outside the door. “i think we want to get there when there’s still a party going on kitten.”
you rolled your eyes at his remark. ‘why would they throw a party at such late notice. especially with a dress code.’ you silently cry to yourself. you’ve been dressed for a bit actually. it’s just… this dress is way more revealing than you could of thought. is this just normal for the N109 zone? you let out a deep breath. this was your only choice.
“easy for you to say! you really expect me to show up like this?” you whined, swinging the door open. you look up to see sylus. his gaze was completely on you, his eyes looked you up and down.
“hm.” he replied moving closer, inspecting your outfit. he stayed silent still, walking around you. goosebumps spilled throughout your body as you felt his gaze fixated on you. "on second thought. stay here a moment." he finally stated, walking back out of the room. you let out a deep breath, as you walked back towards his bed. you patiently waiting for him to return. you expected him to be gone only a few minutes. but he sure was taking his time. right after he teased you about it. you roll your eyes and head out to find him.
you walked downstairs, seeing him talking with luke and kieran. they both peered their head over sylus. to glance over at you. they both slightly tilted their heads before focusing on sylus. "i take it that you two understand?" he asked. they both nod and quickly head off. "you as well mephisto." the crow cawed in response, stretching out it's wings. it flew in the direction of the pair, quickly catching up.
"now who's fashionably late? didn't you want to leave while there's still a party?" you teased, walking down towards him. sylus chuckled, turning around to meet you. "i thought you were going to get me a different dress."
"don't worry about it kitten."
"you really think i should go out like this? i... don't know. i think i'd draw too much attention and-"
"you're really stressed about this, huh?" he asked, tracing the strap with his finger. before you could reply, he started walking up the stairs. he looked at you, and tilted his head upstairs. you sighed and followed him. you didn't know what he had planned but was there even an other option. as soon as you reached his room again, his hands returned on you. "you look gorgeous in the dress though. i don't know how i'd feel having anyone else see you like this." he rested his face in the crook of your neck, facing you towards a mirror. his lips soft brushed against your neck.
"sylus... i can't." you mustered, dodging your reflection. "this information is very crucial. i can't afford to miss getting it."
"i know, i know." he softly replied. he brushed a stray hair from your face. his other hand softly grabbing on your hips. "i sent luke and kieran in our place, along side mephisto." he placed another kiss on your upper neck.
"sy..." you uttered, pulling away slightly. you gave him an concerned look. "we should've-"
"do you trust me?" he asked, leaning closer towards you. your breathing hitched, as you bit your lip. you slowly nod. your eyes locked with his. "i can assure you they'll get all the information you need and more." sylus pauses for a moment, tracing his hand down your jaw. "will you allow me to be selfish, just this once? it's hard to resist when you look this stunning." he tilts your head, showcasing your neck to his lips. he effortlessly leads you back to the bed, gently sitting you down. his kisses gently trail down. your eyes flutter, catching a glimpse of his hand greedily wrapping around your thigh. "lay back, i'll make it all up to you kitten."
⌗ zayne⭑.ᐟ
your doorbell chimes as you fidget with your hair, trying to make sure you look your best. "i'll be right there!" you called out. you looked over at the mirror once more, double checking yourself and your outfit. you sigh and quickly grab your things. you couldn't tell if you were underdressed or overdressed. however you didn't want to keep zayne waiting. you open the door, giving zayne a soft smile as he glances over you. "i hope i'm adequately dressed.." you nervously let out, stepping out of your apartment.
"you look beautiful, no need to worry." zayne reassured, ushering you to the elevator. "besides. it's just a little holiday dinner party that akso throws." his words comforted you, until you actually arrived to the party.
"i thought you said this was a small party? why would we need a venue of this size?" you uttered, as the two of you were ushered in. you were assigned to sit along with other employees in the cardiology department.
"we wouldn't be able to have room for all the departments if it was any smaller. and they have a live band during dinner." he uttered. a chill ran down your body as you felt him lean towards you. he placed his hand on your lower back, guiding you through the crowds. he stopped once he found a group of some of his fellow collegues. he introduced you to a few of them who weren't familiar to you. before talking about various topics. you mostly listened, but contibuted here and there.
“ah! doctor zayne! can i steal you for a moment, i need a bit assistance with setting up the other tables for the dining room.” a waiter asked, halting in front of us. zayne gracefully accepted, leaving you with his fellow colleagues. you left them be in their own conversations while you people watched. you sipped on the champagne they were handing out, just being in your own world.
“do my eyes deceive me? is that you miss? it’s an honor to finally meet you!” you turned around, seeing a complete stranger in front of you. you looked behind you to see if you were mistaken but he was talking to you. he smiles as he approaches you closer.
“and you are?”
“i’m sorry, i forgot that this is our first time meeting. excuse my poor manners.” he chuckled. he introduced himself and his position at the hospital. “you’re quite the talk of the town. you’ve saved plenty of our patients. we can’t thank you enough.”
“oh. it’s nothing. just my job.” you smile politely. you felt your nerves rise. you didn’t anticipate this type of interaction. he continued to praise you and get closer. his hand reached for your arm as he invited you for a drink.
“she already has plans for tonight.” a voice sternly spoke from behind you. zayne pulled you closer to him, leaving the man’s hand still in the air. “excuse us.” he glared, walking pass the man. you just looked at him with wide eyes.
“wait… zayne? the party? why are we heading to the car?” you asked, turning your head back. he showed no sigh of stopping, dead set on his objective.
“we made an appearance. that’s satisfactory enough.” he uttered. “it wasn’t mandatory anyway. we were just being polite.” zayne’s attitude usually wasn’t this stormy. it was hard to read him, but it was clear that something was pestering him. you stayed silent until you reached the car.
“hey, did something happen when-“
“no. i just didn’t like the way he was looking at you. i should’ve stayed with you.” zayne interrupted, looking at you. again, your eyes widened. he was never like this. “ah… i apologize. i don’t know what came over me.” you turn your body so you could face him.
“were you jealous?” you softly smirked, leaning towards him. you cupped his face. “it was pretty attractive…” zayne raised his eyebrow. he placed his hand on your seat, causing you to lean back into your seat. he was practically towering over you now.
“was it now? did you enjoy it?” he smiled, sliding his hand down to your thigh. “because i have no intention of sharing you, sweetheart.” you breath deepened as you felt him lean against you. he quickly pulled the leaver of your seat, pushing it all the way down. he pressed a soft kiss to the corner of your lips, purposely missing. you whined, grabbing on his tie. “should i make sure every man knows you’re already mine?” he asked, whispering into your ear. you continuously nodded as his hand slowly made way to your hips.
⌗ xavier⭑.ᐟ
you glanced over at the mirror. you nervously tried adjusting your outfit. was this too much for an casual job party? you really couldn’t tell. you did yet another glance in the mirror before your doorbell rang. you let out a breath before heading to your front door. you opened it to see xavier. “oh! look who’s finally back!” you smiled, opening the door enough to let him in. he slowly walked inside, taking in your appearance.
“are you heading somewhere?” he asked, ignoring your statement. he leaned against the arm of your couch, with his full attention on you. your heart raced as you ran your finger along the edge of your dress.
“unicorns wanted to throw a small office party.” you replied, walking a bit closer. your face started feeling warm. you couldn’t tell if it was from embarrassment or being flustered by xavier. “it’s a bit much, huh? the outfit? you know maybe i should change into something else.”
before you could step a single step, xavier pulled you into his arms. “you’re thinking too hard. you look lovely.” he replied, nuzzling his head into your shoulder. his arms rested around your waist. you stayed silent for a moment, indulging in the moment.
“xavier, i need to finish getting ready.” you softly say, slowly pushing his arms off. he readjusted his arms, resuming his grip.
“stay with me, for a moment. you have time right? i missed you.”
you let out a hum, as your thumb swept across his arm. you could spare a moment, surely. “fine, just a moment. but can we sit at least? standing here isn’t-“
with that xavier basically swung the two of you onto the couch. he cuddled against you, once again nuzzling into your neck. “was that really necessary?” you giggle, placing your phone onto the coffee table. xavier mumbled in response, placing a kiss on your neck. your body melted with a simple kiss. you slightly move away from xavier, now turning to face him. you cup his face with your hand, brushing your thumb along his cheek. he followed it up with a kiss, pulling you in. you deepened the kiss, feeling his hand grip your thigh. his hand trailed up to your hip.
“mm.. xavier.” you uttered, pulling away. “i got too ahead of myself. i really need to get ready now.” as you were about to get up, your phone rang. you swung your hand over, quickly grabbing it. “hello?”
“did you forget about your best friend tara?” a voice says over the line. “you’re still coming right? you weren’t answering my messages so i thought to call and check up.”
xavier slightly pouted, seeing your attention diverge from him. he pulled you closer, slowly placing kisses down your neck to your collarbone. you mouth at him to stop, your mind buzzing at the feel. he looked at you deviously, moving his hand to your lower back. now pressing himself against you. you let out a gasp, gripping your phone.
“are you okay?”
“oh. tara. i… i’m fine. i just.” you pause, trying to compose yourself. xaiver softly nips at your neck, really testing your ability to be quiet. “i just feel a bit u-under the weather. i’m sorry.”
“oh no! please get some rest! i hope you feel better soon! i’ll send some soup on your way.”
“ah… yes. i’ll see you.” you quickly replied, hanging up. you attempt to place your phone back on the table but completely miss. it didn’t matter, you mind was occupied on something completely different. “you’re such a little devil, you know that?” you gasp, raising your leg over his hip. he doesn’t even respond but goes in for another kiss, while holding onto the bottom of your thigh.
#love and deepspace#lads#love and deepspace oneshot#lads oneshot#love and deepspace x reader#lads x reader#lads x y/n#xavier lads#love and deepspace xavier#rafayel lads#love and deepspace rafayel#zayne lads#love and deepspace zayne#sylus lads#love and deepspace sylus#xavier x mc#rafayel x mc#zayne x mc#sylus x mc#sorrie for fading to black.. i am shy
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hello npmd nation
#i say stumbling into the tumblr tag several months late to the hype and covered in blood#i really love this musical#starkid's an OLD interest of mine (not as old as some but still) and every so often it'll fade and then resurface violently#after several months of dormancy#this is one of those times#nerdy prudes must die#starkid npmd#starkid#grace chasity#peter spankoffski#stephanie lauter#steph lauter#my pookies
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There was something decidedly… insistent about Lena’s footsteps. Kara knew it was her, of course, when she picked up Lena heading towards her apartment. Not just her heart rate but her breathing and mumbling to herself and the way she walked, her footfalls painting a picture of how she was walking, and she was mad.
Kara expected a complaint when she opened the door. Lena would sometimes launch without preamble into a rant about this investor or that senator or some such executive at this or that company and just rant adorably, balling her little fists. Kara would never tell her, because she’d feel patronized, but Lena genuinely was cute when she was angry.
Well, annoyed. When she was really angry, throwing a fit angry, fed up with the world angry, she was something else entirely. Kara would move heaven and earth, quite literally, to address whatever bothered her. When she was sad it was even worse and Kara just wanted to bundle her up in her invulnerable arms and shelter her from everything forever.
Lena walked into the apartment, not looking at Kara, and clearly fuming. She dropped the order she’d picked up on the way into the kitchen island and stared at it, then finally glared at Kara. There was no mistaking the subject of her anger.
Kara fidgeted nervously. She shifted on her feet, feeling a pressure of Lena’s gaze that forced her own away.
“Lena? Is something wrong?” She swallowed, hard. “Bad day?”
“Something is wrong,” Lena said, very softly, in the icy tone she reserved for the fools she did not suffer gladly. “Take off your glasses.”
“What?”
“Take off your glasses, Kara.”
“But I can’t see…”
Lena stepped forward and put her hand on the takeout order in its plastic bag. Kara had ordered it and Lena had agreed to pick it up, far from be first time they’d done that. Lena often ordered for them and Kara brought it when Lena was hosting.
Right now Lena was trembling, head tilted forward like she meant to charge, eyes locked on Kara.
“Glasses. Off.”
Kara hesitated briefly.
“Okay,” she muttered, screaming at herself not to do this, pleading for some kind of distraction.
All she wanted to do tonight was curl up with Lena on the couch and watch a movie and focus very very hard on not giving away how badly she wanted to make out with her.
Kara slowly took the earpieces in her hands and slipped them off, setting the too-heavy frames on the table with a soft clunk. The word rushed in, sounds more vibrant and distracting, colors almost unpleasantly sharp.
Lena was staring at her. Her nostrils flared and her fists clenched. She took her hand from the food bag and took another step forward, then another, finally picking up the glasses in her own hand, feeling them. She raised them as if to put them on and stared through them.
“For someone who says she’s blind without them, these glasses don’t have a very strong prescription, do they.”
Possibilities raced through Kara’s mind. Things she could say, things she might do. She’d squeaked out of this before, somehow evaded Lena’s staggering intellect. She had seen curiosity darken her brows, maybe even brief moments of suspicion.
This was different. Heavier. More serious.
“What gave me away?”
“Everything, really. All the pieces were there this whole time, but I just refused to put them together on my own. It took a flat out slap in the face to make me choose to see it.”
Kara’s chest felt like it was caving in. Everything was going wrong. Her chin quivered and the tears began welling hot behind her eyes.
Lena looked at her flatly. “The guy at the take out place asked me why I was picking up Supergirl’s order. I asked him what the hell he was talking about and he told me Supergirl comes on all the time. Then he showed me a selfie.”
Kara licked her lips.
“It has to be a mistake.”
“They have your number on their speed dial as Supergirl, Kara. You let their delivery kid take a selfie in your suit. They wouldn’t let me pay for it. The old lady that owns the place said ‘Supergirls girlfriend, no charge!’ and started laughing.”
Kara stared at her.
“Lena…”
“You better have a good fucking explanation for why your favorite restaurant knows who you really are and not your supposed best friend.”
The tension in their air was palpable, electric. Kara could feel it like the gathering energy in the air before a storm, ready to burst forth with energy and life or mindless destruction. She folded her arms around herself and looked down.
“You do know me,” Kara finally said. “You do know who I really am. You’re the only person who does.”
Lena’s extension was fixed, intense, edging between a scowl and a pout, and Kara realized with a start that she was holding back tears of her own.
“You’re the only person that knows me as me. You know me without Supergirl, but without all the fake stuff I do so people won’t realize I’m Supergirl. I don’t have to pretend to be clumsy with you. You’re not always looking at me like I’m super strong or super fast. I can just be me when I’m with you.”
“You’ve lied to me so many times,” Lena said, after drawing in a deep breath. “Running away from our lunches, telling me wild stories about where you disappear to at work, and I just bought every bit of it. You must think I’m an easy mark.”
“No, never.”
“I’ve always had it in the back of my head. I always thought there was something there, something between us that kept you from really, truly being yourself with me. The way your touches are always so whisper-light and you’re always stealing glances at me. Like you were afraid with every word or movement that you’d give something away.”
“Lena,” Kara began.
“I knew you were hiding something. I had hoped it was something else.”
Kara licked her lips. She quickened her perception, a little trick of will that took her out of sync with the humans around her, processing the world at her natural speed, which made her peers seem almost frozen in place by comparison.
She took this drawn out instant to really look at Lena, truly take her in, savor what she was seeing because it might be the end. She was suddenly heavily, painfully aware that this might be the last time she ever looked on Lena in person.
Great father Rao, she was so beautiful. Not hot or pretty or even gorgeous or sexy, beautiful. She was dressed for the autumn chill in a pea coat and turtleneck and black leggings and her hair was down, letting itself soften into her natural waves. She was without makeup, and Kara suddenly realized that she only ever saw Lena without makeup when she meant to be alone with Kara. When she was her most pure, most true self.
Kara slowed herself again and as she did the world sped up, and she drank in the soft sadness in Lena’s blue-green eyes and all of those things she’d pushed deep down came bubbling to the surface: imagined sighs and the feeling of that lustrous inky hair slipping through her fingers, her name whispered on pillowy lips.
Human thoughts. Alien thoughts. Desires no Kryptonian should even apprehend, much less indulge. The very idea of the non-procreative act was shameful, and to develop these emotional entanglement…
Kara had once mourned her failure, for she had been charged with preserving the ways of her people. Her first command had been to keep Kal Kryptonian.
A task she had failed even within herself.
“You hoped it was something else?”
Lena looked at her so sadly and so sweetly and swallowed.
“Yeah,” she said in a thick voice, “I kinda did.”
Kara smiled in spite of herself. When she sighed, it was as if the weight of a world slid off her shoulders.
“Can’t a girl have two secrets?”
Lena’s eyes widened.
“One day a long time ago, very very far away, a young Kara looked over her shoulder and watched the shockwave shatter the crust of her planet as its core exploded. She lost everything. Her world, her family, her culture, so many things. Tastes. Colors. Places. All gone.”
Lena wrapped her arms around herself, averting her gaze.
“I knew I’d lose you eventually. I just wanted to keep you as long as I could.”
Lena reached up and rubbed at her eyelids with her fingers.
“Do you remember when your mom’s goons threw you off the balcony?”
“Yes,” said Lena.
“Do you remember how I held you when I caught you?”
“I do.”
“I wish I hadn’t lied. I wish I’d never put you down.”
Lena said nothing and did not look up. Kara could hear her heart racing, practically feel the tension in her limbs across the room.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry I lied. I’ve always known I could never keep you, I just didn’t want to make it end.”
Lena looked up with tear-wet eyes.
Then she lunged across the room, crossing the gap between them in long strides. Kara Danvers -Kara Zoe-El, Supergirl- was caught almost completely off guard. It wasn’t until Lena was practically charging into her arms, leaping into her, that she remembered to cushion the impact, catch her gently and make sure she didn’t slam herself into an unyielding wall of Kara.
She was so surprised, so shocked into helpless acceptance, that she didn’t offer the slightest residence when Lena reached, grabbed her neck in a firm hold, and pulled her into a kiss. Kara’s stomach did a backflip and she was helpless, undone despite all her strength. For a moment both their eyes opened and they looked at each other in a wordless exchange and Kara began kissing her back in earnest. Lena’s sharp breaths and soft moans instantly kindled a hot need inside her, thrumming like a plucked guitar string, and she effortlessly lifted Lena onto the kitchen counter.
“Holy shit, you’re strong,” Lena breathed.
“Of course I am,” she whispered into Lena’s kiss. “I’m Supergirl.”
And at long last, Kara found something she wanted to taste more than potstickers.
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