#useless bisexuals

[natalievoncatte]

“Today?” Kara said, “really?”

There was a silence in the house, as a pall had fallen over it. Everyone was gathered for the festivities and the turkey in the oven was filling the house with a delightful scent that made Lena’s mouth water. Thanksgiving was supposed to be the one day that Lena could forget about her waistline and just indulge herself. She’d been “helping” Eliza along with Alex and Kelly and Nia while the boys and Kara were out back tossing a football and pretending that she and J’onn didn’t have an outrageous advantage over Brainy and James.

Now Kara was standing in the living room as the news broke in over the football game and announced that a rampaging alien was tearing apart Rio de Janiero.

“Guys,” Kara said solemnly, “I have to go.”

Lena’s heart sank. She knew better than to protest. Kara had already glumly removed her glasses and was about to go grab her suit. Lena reached out and curled a hand around her bicep.

“Please be careful, darling.”

Lena could feel eyes on her back, Eliza and Alex and Nia all watching, silently urging one of them to just finally make a damned move. Lena *lived with her*, for God’s sake, and had since she sold her penthouse. They shared breakfasts and Kara gave her foot rubs and still they were stuck in this maddening limbo without defining what and who they were and it seemed neither dared to ask.

Lena knew what she wanted the answer to be, and how it ached inside her.

Kara glumly trudged down the stairs in full Supergirl regalia, regal and imposing as ever and just as beautiful. Since she’d revealed her identity to the world she’d been freed from the constraints of having to disguise herself, and a few months ago had buzzed the left side of her head, having trimmed the rest to shoulder length, and Lena longed to run her fingers over the fuzz.

She’d also altered her suit again. It no longer had sleeves. Every time Lena saw her, it felt like her soul was going to escape her body.

Kara came over and put her hands on Lena’s arms.

“I’ll be fine,” she said.

Lena gulped down her anxiety.

“I can hear your heart, you know.”

“Just be careful. Please.”

Kara started to turn. Maybe it was the audience, maybe she was just tired of being mired in this thick tension between them. Maybe it was the wine. She grabbed Kara’s arm again and sprang forward to brush her lips against Kara’s cheek, dangerously close to Kara’s mouth.

“For luck.”

Kara’s eyes flew open wide and she gaped at Lena.

“I’ll be b-back,” she said, and swept out the door, cape billowing majestically.

God how Lena hated that cape, sometimes. It blocked the view.

What had been a festive gathering grew quiet. Everyone gathered around the television to see what was going on, save Eliza who politely excused herself to the kitchen, hiding tears that everyone politely ignored.

Lena joined her. She was making the gravy.

“A life of fighting isn’t what I wanted for her,” she said.

“Me either.”

They were alone in the kitchen and Eliza was whisking a roux as she waited for the raw flour smell to cook off.

“Lena, do you have feelings for my daughter?”

Lena swallowed hard, grabbing a knife to chop carrots for glazing so that she’d have something to occupy your hands.

Eliza’s voice was soft, something wistful in her eyes. “You must know how she feels about you.”

Lena had to stop to avoid slicing open her finger, almost feeling the touch of the blade. She cleared her throat.

“I do,” she admitted. “I very much do. If I’m going to be honest with myself, I’ve been in love with her for years.”

Eliza nodded, utterly unsurprised. “Kara is very hesitant about delicate things. When she first started living with us, she used to rip doorknobs off and break things at random while she learned to control her powers. She’s probably told you about Streaky.”

“She has.”

Eliza began pouring stock into the pot, her whisk making soft scraping sounds.

“She’s still that way about everything. Afraid if she pushes too hard, she’ll break something.”

Lena nodded. It was at that moment that Alex stormed into the kitchen. “She’s back.”

Immediately, Lena rushed out into the living room. Kara trudged through the door, and sighed.

“He got a few good hits in but he’s contained.”

Lena could only stare. Her suit was covered in scorch marks and even worse, Kara was bruised, her knuckles especially battered. She smiled weakly.

“I just need a minute to clean up.”

With a deep sigh, Kara turned and headed upstairs.

Lena could feel the eyes on her before she glanced back. Eliza motioned a silent “Go”, and Lena went.

She knocked at the bathroom door.

“Lena?” said Kara.

She always knew. Super-senses.

“It’s me. Can I come in?”

Brief hesitation, then, “yes.”

Lena stepped inside and closed the door. Kara was washing her hands, the injuries already vanishing. Lena didn’t care. She took Kara’s hands anyway, gently washing them under warm water.

She then fumbled at the clasps and unhooked Kara’s cape, and folded it. It was surprisingly heavy, made of a dense material from her long lost home. Setting it aside, she rested her hand against Kara’s deliciously broad back, silently waiting for permission.

“Go ahead,” Kara said in a shaky voice.

Lena freed the tab of the hidden zipper and pulled, baring Kara’s expansive muscular back, and peeled the suit away from her shoulders. Kara had nothing but a sports bra and boxer briefs on beneath. She finished shimmying out of the suit on her own.

Lena has seen Kara in bathing suits, or caught flashes of her changing, but this was different, somehow more intimate. There was a vulnerability, not just in the woman disrobing but in the goddess showing Lena her bruises. Lena gently touched a black and purple mark on Kara’s flank.

“This one hurt, didn’t it.”

“It always hurts. I can feel it, I just pretend I don’t.”

Lena looked up at her and met her gaze.

“Kara, may I kiss you?”

Kara blinked and Lena could actually feel her tremble.

“Yes,” she breathed.

Lena rose on her tiptoes and pressed their lips together very softly, with a deliberate slowness. When Kara kissed her back and pulled her into a delicate embrace, hands bracketed low on her hips, Lena felt like she could fly.

Kara was looking at her in wonder.

“Was that for more luck?”

Lena felt bold. She had seize the moment now, before she lost her nerve and they fell back into tense limbo.

“Kara Danvers, if you want to, you can get very lucky tonight.”

Her eyes were wide and Lena grinned.

“I umm, I…”

Lena trailed a finger down the center of Kara’s muscular chest.

“Dinner is almost ready, darling. Take your shower. Just remember to save room for dessert.”

Kara favored her with a delighted smile as Lena stepped out of the bathroom and padded down the stairs.

When she reached the ground floor, everyone was pointedly focused elsewhere, either on the football game or cooking, and Kelly and Nia were playing cards at the dining room table.

Alexa, though, handed her a beer. Lena took it with a shaking hand.

“Fucking finally,” Alex whispered. “Just don’t get too loud tonight, okay? Go down to the beach if you can’t control yourself.”

Lena’s eyes narrowed.

“I hate you.”

“Love ya too, sis-in-law,” said Alex.

“We’re not married yet.”

Alex tipped back her brew. “Six months, tops.”

Lena took a long pull on her beer and scowled.

(It ended up being four months)

[apotheosphorus]

my toxic bisexual but mostly sapphic trait is looking at astarion and feeling nothing except vague platonic affection over his antics but then begging for shadowheart to just look my way and overlook the fact shes a religiously indoctrinated cultist

[bloggerspam]

Mechanic!Val AU, but make it gay and sapphic.

ya'll can thank the HH discord for this one. Specifically the menace known as @clockwayswrites (and @impyssadobsessions for the art that inspired the damn thing)

Dead on Main and with some future Val/Steph >)

also @belfry-ghost did a doodle for this AU and everyone should go love on his art. Val's so unf.

===

Val’s pretty sure her new boss Jay is actually a crime lord.

She’s pretty sure he’s The Crime Lord, actually. She’s like, 98% sure she works for Red Hood now, and she’s low key mad about it. She squints at the man now, with his white streak and almost imperceptible green sheen to his eyes. 

The problem is that Val did perceive it. Because she used to date a guy whose baby blue eyes changed ever so slightly in the same way. Thinking about Danny makes her even madder.

To be clear, she’s not mad about Red Hood himself. 

She’s just mad that, of all the mechanic shops in all of Crime Alley, she just had to work for her ex-boyfriend’s third place Hall Pass pick. It also makes her miss her friends way more, and Val is hardly what one would call a well-adjusted woman, so she’s mad about it.

She huffs as she lifts the hood of the second car she’s working on today. Being a mechanic wasn’t really on the docket for Val’s life goals, nor was being in Gotham, but she got a full ticket ride on Wayne Foundation scholarships, and honestly? 

Gotham is Amity Park Lite: Gargoyles and Furries Edition. 

Between a full ride to Gotham U and being stuck at Elmerton Community College? The choice was easy. 

So here she is, working for the resident Crime Lord in his civvies. 

Jay pays good, teaches her what she needs to know, and bonus: he sometimes helps with her English Literature class. He’s flexible on hours, and she’s even got rudimentary insurance. 

All in All?  It could be worse—she could still be working for Vlad, after all. 

It's the little things.

[kangarooqueen]

[grtmnick]

On some level, Emma was subconsciously aware of the very cleverly conceived and scathingly delivered retort Regina had levied in defense of the blonde’s proposed plan.

However, the majority of the savior’s attention was intensely focused on far more…curvaceous concerns.

[taldigi]

beach episode

[lyriumsings]

OK IM FINALLY HOME AND I JUST GITTA SAY THIS ONE WHYYYY IS NO ONE TALKING ABOUT THIS ONE WHI ARE TGEY IM ON MY KNEEESSS

[tenderfxck]

al haitham is dreaming. he's- he's sure of it.

why else would that secretary he's been harboring some not-so-pure feelings for be bending over right in front of him, her little skirt riding up and over the swell of her ass just enough to see a full show of what cute panties might lay hidden beneath.

except there was nothing under that tight skirt. she. . .

she wasn't wearing anything.

al haitham had the perfect view of two full pussy lips squished so beautifully between the seam of her plush thighs from his desk.

thoughts of planting himself behind her and sliding his cock right into that pretty little cunt almost immediately barged their way into his mind, evicting any other logical thought that may have resided there until this moment. he couldn't possibly look away, liquid heat rushing to his gut at the idea of fucking her doggy-style against the bookshelf she was sorting through right now.

he wasn't sure whether to promote or fire whoever requested those research articles she was now gathering from the large cabinet right in front of his desk. she seems oblivious to al haitham's current ordeal, however. and he was uncertain if she was aware of the revealing position she put herself in. maybe it was just laundry day.

or perhaps, haitham thought, feeling his cock twitch to life even more, she never wears panties. . .

oh, archons.

so now al haitham just has to be patient. he'll sit there, heart hammering away, staring at that tight-looking pussy taunting him from across the room until she's finished her business and takes leave of his office.

he won't breathe a word to her except for a simple request. just for her to close the door on her way out, so as soon as it clicks shut he can pull his cock out and relieve himself of this burning need currently laid weeping against his thigh and straining tight in his pants.

but for now she still sorts through documents, and al haitham will continue burning this sight in his memory to use for many, many lonely nights to come.

[danandfuckingjonlmao]

i think of this tweet every fucking time i watch this scene

video description and transcript in replies

[eahsayswhat]

I love how authoritative Apple looks moments before her brain catches up with her mouth. Cue the flustered mess in 3...2...1...

Happy Pride, everybody!

[xxcrystalinerose]

little funny art idea in my head of megzagthan getting along swimmingly being all romantic and giggly captioned "love wins" vs. mel and nemesis fighting while moros is in the background trying and failing to defuse the situation captioned "love loses"

[apotheosphorus]

oh, to be sabrina carpenter and to kiss jenna ortega; and oh, to be jenna ortega and to kiss sabrina carpenter

[toaster-fire-art]

average friend group

[bishopsmacaroni]

*Yelena stands in her underwear and searches through Kate's wardrobe* Yelena: Do you like this shirt on me? Kate: Yeah. Yelena: What about that jacket? Kate: Nice. Yelena: Can we buy an elephant? Kate: Yeah... wait, what? Yelena: You're not even listening to me, babe. You're just staring at my boobs. Kate: Well, damn, what am I supposed to do? They're right in front of my face and I think I can actually hear them calling for me.

[grtmnick]

Lena “Wandering Emerald Eyes” Luthor

[bisexualfagdyke]

I feel like people have "every identity is valid no matter what and you're a [xyz]phobe and exclusionist if you say anything else" their way out of meaningful, political discussions on queer identity/experiences/prejudice (especially referring to bisexuality here) and that is very frustrating.