#explain me like i am five
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Charles Rowland is in love with Edwin Payne Charles Rowland is in love with Edwin Payne Charles Rowland is in love with Edwin Payne Charles Rowland is in love with Edwin Payne Charles Rowland is in love with Edwin Payne Charles Rowland is in love with Edwin Payne Charles Rowland is-
#i'm manifesting trust#I know I'm delusional but just#HEAR ME OUT FOR A SECOND#if there were to be a second season#I am a firm believer in the 'charles has a bi awakening' arc#listen I understand that there most likely will NOT be a second season and even if there was that would be unlikely but just HOLD ON OKAY#if there is not a second season I will simply#make it up. in my head#...#tada. magic#yeah so this post is mostly about me staring at Charles wide-eyed and somewhat (very) angrily#as he tells Edwin 'cant say I feel the same way'#I smell a fucking LIAR#charles rowland please if I could talk to you for five minutes. please.#let me explain the concept of 'this is not what most heterosexual men do'#and YES there is also the factor of male friendships being heavily emotionally stunted due to societal norms and whatnot but honestly#look me in the eyes#look me.#IN THE EYES#and tell me#that charles rowland is a fucking heterosexual#you cant do it. you cant#these tags went in several directions I was not expecting so uh. yeah.#hello#dead boy detectives#save dead boy detectives#dbda#charles rowland#edwin payne#payneland
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a lot of people act like sqq’s main character trait is obliviousness and i could not disagree more
#it kind of always implies that binghe is being obvious about his feelings and is not the king of mixed messages#shizun i’ll quote romantic poetry at you but while hunting you thru the streets so u can’t even think about it#shizun i was just remembering how you treated me well (chokes him out)#binghe: gives him his robe when he tears sqq’s clothes after threatening to use the blood mites to bite at his organs#i could keep going#when people in the jianghu start to theorize that there’s something romantic going on they’ve had FIVE YEARS of luo binghes bullshit#to start figuring out alternative explanations to explain what he’s got going on#sqq gets like a week before he runs into binghe again and gets nearly killed for LOOKING like sqq#do you see what i am putting down#can we just be honest about the situation being complicated and sqq having to make sense of a LOT of conflicting information#this isn’t even getting into how he feels genuinely threatened by lbh being sweet bc it was a precursor to bingge planning something awful#which we get literal proof of in the punishment protocol#sqq’s got the worst case of confirmation bias
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i’m reading the traitor baru cormorant and the best way i can describe the experience is that it’s like if gideon the ninth was told from harrow’s pov. i do not know what’s happening. i need an unreliable jock narrator to gloss over all the political machinations and tell me how hot (or not) everyone is
#am i enjoying it? idk i think so but again i really don’t have a grasp on the plot#i see why the tlt girlies are all over it though#also it’s taken me over two weeks to read and it’s not even that long!#not done yet so no spoilers please but if someone wants to take pity on me and explain it like i’m five#i wouldn’t say no#baru cormorant#the traitor baru cormorant
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what do we think is the most low effort "observance" of "passover" i could do
#i'm so tired man. we still don't know if 🌸 has a job or not. also everything else is happening#and our local grocery store only just started stocking challah again after weeks of just not carrying it so tbh im not even really feeling#any serious abstention from chametz. though i suppose i rarely am.#anyway right now i'm at ''make vegan matzo ball soup for 🌸 and i and then do the most abbreviated two-people-one-jew seder possible''#but that might be..... TOO sad?????#i know like one jew well and he's busy flying back and forth across the country for his wife's job#and everyone else i know is thru union work meaning theyre attending a Leftist Seder which will have Themes#and involve some kind of nightmarish power struggle between the hanukkah-only jews who want to bring mac and cheese to the seder#and the two conservative or orthodox jews who will consider a potluck with food prepared in a non-kosher kitchen to be an act of#anti-semitic aggression.#and in fairness to them. absolutely none of it will have been prepared in a kosher kitchen. but they do also feel this way about music.#and this would all be bad enough but then i will also have to hear about the Themes from the least subtle least fun least interesting#haggadah ever poorly assembled by a group of really sincere people i like and also can't stand.#box opener#as always i hate a stirring slogan. i hate to listen to someone else explaining a cause i already agree with to me#i want a tight five on specific actionable plans to improve community efforts to protect protestors on visas#and then i want us to leek battle recite some shit and eat.
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i always forget exactly how crazy this scene is.
#'your arrival here was most timely.' 'a gift.' [looks him up and down] 'how succinctly put.'#and then five like 'how am i doing at explaining your plan to you?' & the master's full of amused praise. like.#and the stakes are SO LOW.#'how do you propose to stop me?' 'i shall have to give it some thought.' 'you haven't much time.' -> perfect lead-in#to the sex that the master obv thinks they're about to be having.#doctor x master#dw
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yunho and changmin as well as seulgi and irene are never gonna leave fuckass sm entertainment and for what. for me to suffer.
#how do you fail at something sj did. explain it to me like i am five.#center 3 is sm's graveyard officially. like they formed this for tvxq and rv to die.#al.txt
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You're allowed to be proud of yourself for achieving things that are not seen as achievements or are seen as "just the norm."
Sometimes, the achievement is reaching where others have always been, and it isn't about being normal, but about the things you have done to achieve a goal. You can celebrate and be proud no matter how "small" a feat it is
#positivity#encouragement#encouraging words#(mentioning food in the tag rant)#i'm proud of myself for trying a new food on a whim (or new as ini've never tried that specific variation of the food before)#and i'm happy with myself because this takes a lot of energy and mental space to actually do and i did it#and i'm not proud that i did a thing 'normal people' do (eating a variety of foods)...#...i am proud that i did something for myself. i am proud that i safely went out of my comfort zone#that need not me emulating the 'normal person'#forever annoyed at microwaved foods which get hot quickly and then lose that heat as you eat it#is this just a me thing because i feel like those microwave meals get cold quicker than food cooked any other way#deploying science side of tumblr to explain microwaves like i am five (lighthearted)
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i think i'm just fundamentally evil and broken ?
#went on a walk#it's so sad outside#i listened to the latest mitski album twice and i was on the verge of tears the entire time#i guess i thought time did heal old wounds but maybe ignoring and avoiding the wounds is not the same as healing them#im having thoughts and feelings that im so ashamed of#i dont feel like theres anyone i can tell this to im just afraid it'll change how they perceive me forever#im not even sure how to explain things to myself#am i normal am i wrong#all i want is to curl up into my bed and have someone take care of me#but i can't do that i need to grow up and there are things to do and i can't have everything i want always#i'll try and work on this assignement for thirty or forty five minutes or something and then ill allow myself to curl up into a ball and cr#or maybe i'll knit and watch something and get myself busy bc thats what i do#i just avoid the uncomfortable parts of myself thinking theyll go away or something#it's the greed#it's the greed.
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love the little notes I leave for myself on my wips:
#why am I watching videos about heart defects instead of just writing this thing you might ask?#I have no idea#maybe it’ll become plot relevant#ANY CARDIOLOGISTS MUTUALS ABOUT? i have questions#I wish I actually knew what I was talking about though because#I CANNOT for the life of me grasp what Julian meant about bajoran spines#HOW would bilateral vertabrae (or god forbid two spines) even work?????#someone who got a higher grade in anatomy class than I did come explain this to me like I’m five#shut up krissy
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Lately that one F/O has me acting up so bad that I wonder how serious I take it. I want to wait and see before making hasty statements but given what he makes me do... I wonder how serious I am truly about this one.
Ramble in tags to see what I mean I guess.
#Nimue's Rambles#Pancake Detective#It's about Goro Akechi by the way#I still love my other f/os (and I think due to something suspected my focus may shift once in a while) but something draws me back each time#I dunno how to explain it but each day I just grow more attached to him. And it's very bad. I react in ways I react for no other f/o.#Like dude even has a selfship focused side blog just for him (which I intend to use more. Need to just let loose and post about him more)#It may be more serious than thought? Even Lukanja is the sona I consider closest to me.#Five seconds away from screaming “That's my boyfriend!” - A big deal since I don't wanna use the term f/o on him at this point.#Sorry a bit to process. I may shift the focus on this blog a little if so. I still have my other f/os and keep this blog active. Obviously!#Just might ficus to more general stuff on this one here and gush about other f/os here and there? I am not sure.#Lately Akechi has me acting up though... I can always revert my decision but something to consider for myself I guess.#I dunno. Just rambling here randomly.
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I have confirmation that at least 5 of my teenage boys are actually reading Pride and Prejudice. Which I means I can set down the battle I’m always having in my own mind :)))) Austen wins again :)))))
#it’s more than 5 I’m pretty sure. but I have indisputable proof that five are doing it#also. one of them read lit charts but then accidentally got himself hooked#fills me with delight glee and joy#like I am so unsure of many things but that this is one of the particular ministries I am meant to have I am so certain of#that ministry being: getting teenage boys to read Jane Austen and like it#truly one of the hardest tasks there is lol#and of course I don’t succeed with all! many such cases of it not succeeding#but it is starting to change a little bit#and it’s just like. 😭😭😭😭#this is the cultural change I want to see happen in the world almost more than anything else#it means so much to me. can’t explain it. (I mean I could but)#teaching tag
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is it also painful for some of you to be a phanny with no phanny friends? like i see people online lose the same braincells i did over some tedious, minute and toothrottingly domestic detail, and then go back to my friend group like 'hey hows it going man?'
#i am clawing my face#how do i even begin to explain to anyone how monumentally important it is for me to find a way to make it to the show#somehowwww#im aiming at amsterdam who wants to go#lowkey relieved i will not make it to the show that is in three days? huh?#like#i need to explode over spoilers alone#its a private affair in my evil layer#lair.#im tired.#its five am#what am i doing here#just to suffer?#dnp#dan and phil#dick and penis
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Wooowwwwww. Yeah I had too much fun drawing this
#I don’t know what gore looks like so I’m too nervous to post the uncensored version#but it was sooooo fun to draw ough#artie.draws#fnaf#michael afton#five nights at freddy's#OKAAAY I don’t actually know a lot about Fnaf but my friend explained some of the lore and I am obsessed with this Michael guy#actually I could post the uncensored version if people want me to#but I’m. it’s not realistic. like with the scooper. it wouldn’t look like what I drew#can you tell how nervous I am about posting this
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my coworkers: so what're you watching these days? anything to recommend?
me, sweating: well uh. i've actually been really into this. procedural mystery series from the 70s.
#whenever anyone asks me for what i'm watching i feel like i have to explain myself lmao#like no i am NOT watching the mr beast reality tv or w/e the fuck instead i am watching my blorbo columbo solve crimes#severance is probably the first time i've been caught up with a culturally relevant tv show since like. game of thrones???????#usually i dont get into it until like five years after everyone is tired of it lol#liveblogging life#before this i was watching poirot too so i had to explain that to a coworker#me: yeah i'm actually watching this 90s whodunnit series of a belgian detective
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it's so funny when someone lies about you because people will be mean about what they heard and it's just like okay well that's not true but whatever .think what you wanna think bro
#help im actually fully over the situation#but i was just thinking about how hilarious it is how quickly people dropped me for something they didnt even bother to ask me about#like 😭😭 if youd let me explain#whatever if they cared they would've just.not made fun of me and would've let me talk for five goddamn minutes.so i don't really care anymo#i have my boyfriend and a pepsi I'm content with life and away from the person who made me want to die for months#i see a future for the first time in years.who cares if i lost some people who obviously didn't like me in the first place#gooooooddbye forever sunshine cult i am over all of you bitches#/silly
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I don’t like that I’m collecting a list of robots/ai that hate their creator
#oh let’s see#from tame to absolutely wild we got#five pebbles from rain world (he’s more like an emo teen defying parents to me) (I think his#‘hate’ is more petty annoyance or frustration that he can’t die#star dream from Kirby planet robobot never said I don’t think but cmon there’s something evil about that thing#WX-78 from Dont Starve now we start getting into some actual hate#with like actual ground evidence#WX hates wagstaff I believe and in general hates humanity#but doesn’t have the capability to do much since their in a limbo?#idk hard to explain#then there’s AM from I have no mouth an I must scream#I don’t want to explain his whole mess#like Jesus#iykyk#sprite spam#there’s probably more like maybe from Detroit become human but idk it’s been a hot minute since I’ve watched it#edit: GLADOS I FORGOT GLADOS FROM THE PORTAL SERIES#THE OBVIOUS ONE#AIGH
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