#expect stupid things
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I hate that they are still friends with them. I've been at the point in my anger that I do want them to be miserable, at least a little bit, cause I'm still fucking thinking about this almost daily, they should still be experiencing that pain too.
Of course I'm also getting my comeuppance for how I treated E. Probably feeling a lot of the same feelings as them, hating that people are still friends with the people who wronged you. Or she's more emotionally mature then me and doesn't feel that way at all, or at least not as long as I am. Which is likely.
I want to stop caring so bad. I hate the amount of emotional energy I'm constantly giving to this hurt. They don't deserve even that much of my thoughts.
But if I can't move on from them right now, then I think I should work on forgiving MGH. Freeing up some old emotional burdens at least..... things to tell my therapist....
#i shouldnt scroll on Instagram first thing#so i dont have to see my friends that they live with posting their smiling faces#god why did i have to be so wrapped up in him#i hope he regrets losing my obsession for the rest of his life#and i hope he gets around to cheating on her before he makes her have his kids#personal#relationships#break ups#i couldnt imagine thinking my relationship would stablize after giving someone that kind of ultimatum#i hope shes doesnt feel stable in that relationship#and i hope he does cheat on her or something#expect stupid things#win stupid prizes#a straight monogamist doesnt deserve all this emotional energy from me but i can't fucking stop it rn!!!!!!#aahhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!#i need to fuck someone so he isnt the last person to have touched me anymore#thank god i have a date with a hot married women next week
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it seemed like a good idea at the time...
inspired by this panel in Action Comics 1067 (2024) art by Eddy Barrows, Cian Tormey, and Danny Miki
#superman#fanart#superheroes#my adventures with superman#fan comic#clois#clark kent#dc superman#superheros#lois lane#superman and lois#lois and clark#Kara talked Clark into doing something “badass”#Clark regrets it almost immediately#Lois expected better#stupid impulsive decisions ARE HER THING#post season 2
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a little comic about my (and Pauk's) Skyrim experience
#in my mind Lydia is a voice of reason forced to do stupid things#and Pauk is a desperate guy trying his best to live up to people's expectations#doing everything he can to be a hero that Skyrim needs (he has no idea what he's doing. he's in panic 24/7)#and Barbas is just a four-legged douchebag (there's no way I'm going to return him)
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How do you get this far into adulthood *on the internet* without basic knowledge on how to cook are you stupid on purpose
Dang, I wouldn’t say that I’m stupid just because I didn’t know one thing.
My parents hate vegetables. Every meal I had at home growing up was either a frozen box meal or a from a can. My family didn’t teach me how to cook. They taught me how to heat up a frozen meal.
Now I absolutely love vegetables, and I love cooking. Unfortunately it’s hard to learn basic cooking skills as an adult because I tend to get called stupid when I admit that I don’t know something.
#where else was i supposed to learn this shit.#I took a basic cooking class and they assumed I had more knowledge than I started with#these are the kind of things that people expect your family to teach you#and if your family fails to do so#then everyone just calls you stupid
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fuck you FIA, honestly
#let's be honest here#if max had apologized that day he would STILL have to do community service#and today FIA would still post the same shit excuse#because hey charles clearly didn't say the same thing huh clearly these are different situations here#fia is ruining this sport at a level i clearly expected#because fia's next move will always be WORSE and STUPID than the previous one#max verstappen#mv33#mv1#charles leclerc#cl16#lestappen#f1#formula 1#brazilian gp 2024
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That "I don’t want to" after the dice roll hit me HARD… rip Billie you deserved better
Some extra sketches under the cut
I didn’t feel like lining and rendering a second page, but I really like that last Harry
#disco Elysium#Harry du bois#kim kitsuragi#comic#fanart#working class woman#billie mejean#disco Elysium skills#physical instrument#empathy#pain threshold#harrier du bois#I wasn’t expecting empathy to straight up REFUSE#I thought Harry would say some stupid insensitive shit 😭#I’m soooo happy w how the skills dialogue turned out in that middle panel#I got so close to doing a game-style playback thing and then inspiration hit
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Different anon here, I’m studying to get into College where I can learn Bachelor of Multimedia Arts!!! It’s so glad to meet someone on tumblr who’s actually learning this.
I can't enjoy the course with this damned school fr AAAHAHAHHA
#messyr#I HOPE YOU FIND A GOOD SCHOOL ENVIRONMENT ( IF NOT THE SYSTEM ) TO LEARN AT#MOST OF US HERE IN THE CREATIVES ARE BURNT OUT OR OVERWORKED W THE AMOUNT OF PROJECTS AND QUALITY THEY EXPECT FROM US AAAHH#SO MANY UNECESSARY BULLSHT#also i picked this out bc arts/animation schools are so fukin far from where I live ::( cant afford so im stuck with graphic design yipeee#uhm. Picked out this course also bc I want a little bit of EVERYTHING. like- i like to learn a lot than just fully focused on one thing#proceeds to get shit grades anyway#man#im stupid AHHAHAHAHA
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we don’t acknowledge enough how dee used to be a pageant winner when she was a kid and how much damage it did to her. she worked her ass off and got recognition for being pretty and talented at a young age and it was the only source of self esteem she could garner in a family that constantly berated and talked down to her. she sought after that external approval because it was the only way she could prove everyone around her wrong. her dream of being a performer didn’t come from a self-aggrandizing delusion— she genuinely showed a lot of potential when she was younger. but she went through an unflattering puberty and her spinal condition got worse and that natural talent she had as a kid plateaued way too early. the “former gifted kid” dilemma. she slowly lost the thing that promised her that she was good, but she was so desperate to keep holding onto it that she tried anyway. again and again and again no matter how much people made fun of her because it was always about proving them wrong. but after a while she couldn’t jump anymore without anticipating the way it feels when she hits the ground face first. self-sabotage became her way out, choosing to rather live in the fantasy of her own unrealized potential and blaming those around her for her lack of success, than having tried and crashed again. she’d rather buy lottery tickets over and over and never scratch off the numbers than to see that she lost. that self-sabotaging behavior bled into other aspects of her life too, from friendships to relationships to therapy. her own short lived success is what made her grow into embodying the cycle of failure.
#iasip#dee reynolds#oh deandra#someone tell her she’s good#this may very well be a diary entry vaguely disguised as character analysis but lets move past that#also doesn’t not help at all that im going through my own dennis and dee go on welfare unemployment plotline irl#BUT LETS MOVE PAST THAT#she’s such a fascinating character i really hope they explore her more in s17 bc she’s been like. a side character for the past few seasons#another thing i regret not telling charlie when i had the chance ugh#i wanted to be lighthearted and complain about the promo pics being ugly but when i opened with ‘#‘can i air out some grievances’ he was so open to it and actually seemed kind of disappointed that i WASNT talking about the writing#and it was like. in no universe could i have possibly been prepared to have an in depth convo ab the show with him at that loud ass bar#or like. expected him to be open to WRITING CRITICISM of all things#there’s so much i could have aired out. So much. but alas#what was i talking about#oh dee#anyways yes dee my sweet dee i love her my stupid tragic middle aged girlfailure my wifr#wife#i love you
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[I.D. Lineart drawing with simple shading using characters from TMNT 2003, two panels. In the first, the turtles stand with weapons at the ready and various expressions of shock. Donny exclaims "Bishop... cloned himself?!" In the second panel, Bishop stands next to the clone, a cyborg with long, wild hair, and smirks. He says "I know isn't he hot". End I.D.]
The line in the show is Bishop calling his clone a "handsome devil, if I do say so myself" but that's still a weirdly roundabout way to compliment yourself at the very least
(also full disclosure I just traced screenshots from the show for this lol)
#image described#tmnt 2003#2003 bishop#2003 donnie#2003 mikey#2003 leo#2003 raph#tmnt 2k3#teenage mutant ninja turtles#my art#tmnt shitpost#bishop: i am a perfectly rational actor and everything i do is logical#also bishop: calls his clone good looking#sir that's pure egotism at the very least and also that thing doesn't even look like you??? the clone has different facial structure#but really what would i expect from a guy who basically typed 'i'm so sexy oh yeah baby' into a government computer#anyway if i dont make stupid doodles i die so here's one for ya
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i'm being so serious when i say that someone needs to tell the piastris to get off social media immediately. stop feeding the parasocial relationships. stop it.
#yes the fans are the ones in the wrong but it's stupid and naive to expect them to all do the right thing#you have to create boundaries#it might be funny now but it's not going to be funny forever
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OH, FUCK THE FORK AND KNIFE I'LL RIP IN HANDS AND TEETH AND TAKE A BITE~!
sorry that i cant stop thinking about (You dreamt you were eating your friends whole.) (You want to throw up.) and cant be normal about it or whatever. like i have a choice in the matter 🙄
#im literally transgender you expect me to be normal about cannibalism as a form of (whatever the fuck it is in this context)?#cmon now. cmon.#in stars and time#isat spoilers#isat loop#isat siffrin#<- its technically loop in this drawing specifically but like. when they were still a siffrin#so it gets the sif tag too. you understand#laika art#fuck this stupid goddamned. cloak. also.#spent like 30 minutes trying to get the right side looking like smth. me when the thing thats supposed to be easy to draw is HARD TO DRAW
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Mmmmmmm .. pepsicola.
#pepsicola#dave strider#john egbert#homestuck#i am thoroughly aware that my shift from tma to homestuck is the whiplash of the century#like believe me i didnt think my life would go like this either#but the adhd says stupid 2009 webcomic gives serotonin#this fuckin thing is about to display just how much of a shameless multishipper i am#expect cherrypepsicola#my art#doodle page#hammertime#johndave#davejohn
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fic idea where mikami takes so long to arrive at the warehouse that the task force and SPK all just go out for brunch. it ends up being a strangely pleasant day together, and they part ways completely forgetting what was supposed to happen at the warehouse in the first place. title "this meeting could have been a massacre"
#death note#light yagami#near#nate river#the au I came up with is getting too complex for me to share anything solid rn#so you will get my stupid ideas until further notice#having so much fun racking my brain for fic ideas where light and near can interact despite all the other stuff going on#cafe brunch date by the sea along with the rest of their teams is not what I expected but we're here now. you can't stop me#I've been giggling over this since I thought of it yesterday#also new writing tag debut#elle writes things
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see i do think there have been actual instances of fandom people just deciding two characters are siblings with no real basis and acting like its canon and forcing that interpretation on others and getting mad at people who disagree . but a lot of the characters i see people list as examples of this happening with are just actually stated to or heavily implied to see eachother as siblings by the source material and at that point i think you just dont see adopted siblings as real siblings idk what else to tell you
#like if i were to give some sonic examples of this happening i would say (game/comic/etc) sonic and knuckles or sonic and shadow#ive literally seen people get hate comments on their art of those ships saying its incest or whatever even though. thyere not brothers ..?#but whenever i see people talk about this sort of thing happening in the sonic fandom their examples are always fucking.#sonic and tails?????? or shadow and maria?????????#what are you TALKING about those characters are literally outright stated to view eachother as siblings#and in sonic and tails' case even if they werent brothers the age gap is still reason enough to be grossed out by people shipping them ..#i think your ejust being stupid about it on purpose#also to be clear i dont care if people wanna decide characters are siblings with no real basis ive literally done that before#i love doing that actually#i just dont think its reasonable to do that and expect everyone on earth to agree with you#thats not the point of the post though the point of the post is people pretending that adopted siblings arent actally siblings
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out of context
ignore the weird shadow placement ok i only realized my mistake after i finished it and by then i was too lazy to fix it
#fanart#art#drawing#sketch#cult of the lamb#cotl#cotl narinder#the death kimono thing is on purpose ok#i accidentally did it once and then i thought “that would make sense actually”#narinder testing it's mortality strikes again#the ate glass incident everyone was high#its a cat what do you expect me to do? not make it look cute and stupid?#shams while narinder is acting stupid 🥰
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okay i do have to do a mini (i call it mini now.. this is just letting my feelings about it out, so its spelled agressively bc im just so .. frustrated ... also not hate to the studio or the people working on it .. obviously >_>) rant about arcane-
SPOILERS AHEAD FOR ARCANE SEASON 2
its the most beautiful show ever produced, i mean it, its style, fortiche's (the studio) style, is just .... impossibly pretty, 3d and 2d, the animation is just so GOOD, the designs largely (like 95%) are too, the acting and sound design, the voice acting (at least the english one) is so emotional and good, the show in general is just good ... until the last episode
i have my own problems with riot declaring arcane the new canon out of nowhere and for no good reason since it was, im very sure, never conceived to be that, its a reinterpreation and works best as such, now literally everything is once again completely messed up, no one knows whats real and what isnt, no champion or story is safe, especially with the weird hexcore bullshit potentially erasing the VOID (whish is like ... half on which the canon was built on tbh) AND hextech- multiple champions being impossible to exist now .... but thats not what i wanted to talk about
i was pretty on board with everything the show did, though i wasnt a big fan of the whole hexcore stuff, but it all spiraled so far out of control, it just kept making everything worse, also with bringing in the black rose and leblanc, it kept piling stuff onto the plate despite them already compressing everything so drastically; espeically regarding viktor, but i kept my hope up even after season 2s act 2 bc it still seemed 'fixable', though not easily so
what i liked about it (in its writing) despite its pacing issues was that it was rather .. self contained for the longest time, focused on the characters and the class struggle of piltover and zaun, and doing so rather well imo, like it did and said things i did not expect riot to let through
i was worried with the alternate universe stuff that came with the escalating hexcore bullshit but held onto hope even until episode 8 and then ...man .. the last episode ... the fuck was that- like i hate timetravel and multiverses and whatever but the thing with ekko was done rather neatly ... they made all those chaarcter models and sets just for that short stuff and really .. was of little use other than getting heimerdinger out of the picture as well lmao maybe he will get his own series to advertise for 200 dollar skins in league hahaaaa but i guess the main point was to give ekko the z-drive ... which feels alot like what i feared about them forcing it to comply with the characters in game ,,,, even though that wasnt for everyone like warwick was done SO dirty after giving me hope in act two
everythings focused on the hexcore/arcane shit, theres the black rose shit (honestly i think it was a mistake bringing them in too bc .. noxus is its entire own region with so many champs and story itself that got connected via ambessa .. which was a new character the show made up until they made her a champ now .. its just too much to put into this one show already going at a breakneck pace), mel doing her bit with them then bam she mage now which felt like a champion teaser more than an organic part of the story, especialyl with how hard it got pushed later (poor little riots gotta sell more game cosmetics uwu), jayce just taking over control again and everyone going with it, singed reviving stupid version victor via using vander/warwick WHO WAS STILL ALIVE AFTER ISHA BLEW HERSELF UP TO STOP HIM FROM KILLING EVERYONE (which was ALREADY pretty cheap, but i guess jinx had to be even more suicidal than she already was heehoo), dont even ask me HOW, viktor was just whoops from corpse to im a cocoon now, ambessa being so obsessed with it, the entire class struggle being """"solved"""" by piltover and zaun fighting stupid viktors weird ass robot shitheads together and then acting like giving sevika a seat at the council is the solution to it, half the cast just dying horribly for honestly no reason?? ORIANNA being now i guess some weird viktor robot but without the mindcontrol part and singed just kinda ... winning i guess by giving her cocoon some goo of stupid viktors cocoon
it just all ... turning from this so drama, character and class struggle thing into weird ass dimension hopping magical world war that all gets solved bc we fought together once uwu AND it being a fucking timeloop WITHIN what ONE episode? and that being the ENDING (i know i know the hexcore bs was building up throughout the show but it still felt so .. unearned and sudden ... )
also i got personal gripes with the 'ending' bc .. was it REALLY an ending like they kept saying?? was it?? viktor, jayce, heimerdinger, jinx are just disappeared i guess, mel going back to noxus- the fucking 'our story isnt over' tease???? the last minute appearance of swains fucking raven???? pecking at something blue and shining like idk a hex crystal??? SHUT UP i dont want more to come, this story should have had its self containing ending, not this open ended bullshit that just reeks of corporate meddling bc they want their game to connect to their popular show as much as possible now so we gotta bring in as many teases and connections to other champions YIPPIEEEEE (yelling)
also if jinx is dead, wow, what a way to end her story, the traumatized suicidal character being tortured and tortured especially after seemingly having something good for once (i liked act 2 except for its ending the most bc ... man jinx was so enjoyable there, i loved her dynamic with vi and isha and half wolf vander warwick with the beast and man struggle i love alot, that part was genuinely beautiful, i wasnt a fan of the idea of idk ekko doing time stuff and them having a happy ending bc i just dont like going back in time to fix everything kinda stuff, but i would have much much prefered that, not changing the existing story into the perfect world where everythings happy (though i liked that part ... vander silco being gay husbands like that is just so goood) but to fix what is fixable in the present- them still having gone through alot but being able to live with it, so act 2 setup was honestly my favorite way to not invalidate everything and still have something happy .... but no we gotta kill the kid to make jinx even worse and vander/warwick too while we are at it
if shes not dead (given you see a blimp(?) flying away and her scribbles showing up and caitlyn looking at the blueprints of the hexgates) then ... ??? oh yeah lets make her leave zaun and just idk go be the main character in noxus or soemthing for the next show they are gonna do bc jinx is popular so putting her everywhere is a good idea!!!1!!11
ALSO since vander/warwick is my favorite .. i thought maybe after isha doing that, if they dont reverse it, hed get taken by singed again or ran away and turned fully werewolf like he is in the game (though i would have liked if they were able to be a weird family like in act2)- but no he just gets used as fuel for stupid viktor cocoon and then mind erased and made into the ugliest weird robot thing that looks more like galio than him JUST and i feel like it really is JUST to have Vi at the end do the scene that gets jinx 'killed' .. to lead into the 'more to come' teaser.. idk about you but that scene felt so .. forced, the typical oh no platform is slowly falling down but Vi suddendly gets emotional about weird ugly robot warwick (who conveniently comes back to life as ugly robot beast since his human mind got erased but not the beast??? i guess???) and completely ignores jinx yelling at her to get to safety, it felt so WEIRD to me (if you gotta do him like that at least let Vi listen to jinx, them embracing and then watchign emotionally as robo vanderwick falls into the hexgate thing .. that was still active somehow i guess??)
(poor viktor got done so dirty too .. i liked him .. until it all went weird wit hthe hexcore stuff ....... ..... also jayce weird speech to him .. why the FUCK did you not do that back in the cult camp instead of blasting him to bits, i get it he was fucked up from seeing the future, but then later hes just ... okay???? pretty fine all things considered??? and pretty aware of everything?? also his weird speech being all like vitkor actually you were perfect in your imperfection BITCH HE WAS SLOWLY DYING AN AGONIZING DEATH???? idk ??? it all feels so weird to me, like there episodes literally missing- ambessa dying also felt so unnecessary .. just so mel can take her place and go to noxus and have more shows maybe- )
i just .... and just like how i cant enjoy botw anymore after them fucking it all up with totk ... i dont know if i will rewatch arcane knowing it ends like that, what was that for, the most beautiful show ever made just to do a game of thrones ending in a single episode?
im so tired of it all ..... im so tired of being disappointed and feeling let down over and over no matter with how little expectations i go in with
this willl be the only arcane rant unless theres some .. big stupid reveal that gets me more frustrated than i am now, which i hope there isnt .. im tired of being and feeling like this .. i just want to enjoy things, everythings going to shit IRL and i cant even find something enjoyable to watch
#ganondoodles talks#personal#arcane#arcane spoilers#arcane season 2 spoilers#im 'fine' ... i just needed to get this out#i feel like i keep letting my time and thought and emotional investement into things be wasted#by allowing myself to care about it#and that maybe im just stupid and wrong and maybe i just cant enjoy things#i just have idk too high expectations or other generic argument xyz#ill have to mostly log off for at least the rest of the day#maybe the weekend .. and then im back into work stress hahaa yay#whatever ......#i hate being such a bummer ...... as i said before .. i do not enjoy being a “hater”#i dont enjoy not enjoying things nor making others dislike them#long post#bc of course its never not a long post
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