#evil or not i’d smash

[grubbed-up-goblen]

I drew this birb lady awhile ago, she’s kinda slay (evil)

[charactersmashorpass]

"MOMMY! Sorry. She’s so pretty and tall and I’d let her crush me"

[ashboy-3]

Smash or Pass

Fandom: Danny Phantom and Batfam Prompt: https://www.tumblr.com/help-i-need-a-cool-username/719653067055906816/ashboy-3-please-tag-me-whenever-you-post-it?source=share Characters: Danny, Sam, Tucker, Jason, Batfam Words: 1908 Summary: Danny refuses to sleep and gets stopped by a reporter. Not fully knowng what she aks when questioning him about Red Hood Danny answers with a simple Smash. Now if only his crush Jason Todd would pick up on the social cues.

“So what’s the game tonight?” Danny asked, looking at the screen of the video camera to see Tucker and Sam staring back at him.

“Are you sure Danny. Isn’t it like ten over there?” Sam asked, worry clearly on her face.

“It’s not a good night for sleep Sam. Please. You two both have the day off, right?” Danny asked.

“Yeah we do dude. So I was thinking Smash or pass?” Tucker threw the idea out there.

“Oh that’s a good one. What should we do it on?” Danny asked.

“Super smash bros? It has Smash in the name?” Tucker suggested.

“Then we should totally do Pokémon!” Sam had an evil smirk.

“Oh you are both so on!” Danny quickly agreed as Tucker quickly found a full list online of the Super Smash bro fighters, sharing his screen and making sure to record, if anything for future black mail reasons.

“Alright first up Mario,” Tucker announced, both his friends knowing that he would rather be the impartial party and narrator while they have their fun.

“Pass.” Danny and Sam voiced.

“Donkey Kong.”

“Pass,” Danny quickly said.

“Smash!” Sam was quick to say as the two looked at each other.

“You want to smash a giant monkey?” Danny questioned.

“First off he’s a gorilla, second you can’t tell me that he doesn’t fuck,” she quirked her eyebrow at him.

“Fair enough,” Danny yielded holding up his drink to take a sip in her honor.

“Dude that’s water,” Tucker rolled his eyes.

“Don’t’ remind me. Who’s next!”

“Link.”

“Smash” Tucker rolled his eyes at his two friends.

“Sometimes you two are so predictable. Samus.”

“Pass,” Sam waved her off.

“Smash. Let her fuck me up, in or out of that suit!”

“Dark Samus?”

“Same,” they both agreed, to keep their answers from last time.

“Yoshi.”

“Smash!” Sam yelled out, Danny thinking about it before he to agreed.

“Why am I friends with you two? Kirby?”

“Pass,” Sam said as Danny thought abot it. “Yeah pass. I feel like Kirby is to innocent. And dude who else would you be friends with. Hit me with the next one!”

“Fox and Falco.”

“Pass on Fox smash on Falco,” Sam decided. “Pass on both,” Danny shook his head.

“How could you smash one but not the other? Their the same thing?” Danny asked.

“First off their not. I feel like Falco is more bad ass. Second, I don’t want to hear that argument when we get to pokemon.”

“Fair enough.” Danny agreed.

“Speaking of Pokemon I’m skipping them in this list since that’s our next list,” Tucker skipped the image of pikachu. They both passed on Luigi, Ness, Captain Falcon, and jigglypuff.

“I would so smash princess peach, daisy, and Rosalina. Line them up!” Danny cheered.

“Really Peach? I would only smash Rosalina. She at least had a story line,” Sam rolled her eyes.

“Bowser?”

“Smash the fucking hell out of me!” Danny cheered.

“Okay I know I’m a monster fucker, but are you sure you’re not one?” Sam asked him.

“I have never actually thought about it,” Danny shrugged. “But you still didn’t answer the question?”

“Of course, I’d smash Bowser. Pass on Wario, Waluigi, and Dr. Mario,” Sam rolled her eyes, a smile on her lips.

“Yeah, I can agree with that statement,” Danny shook his head in understanding. “We are passing on the ice climbers?” Danny asked.

“Of course!” Danny agreed. “and you know I’m smashing Sheik and Zelda!”

“Smash Sheik pass on Zelda.”

“You are aware that their the same person right?” Tucker asked her.

“I’m very aware. Sheik could kill me and Zelda is a broing princess. I know what I want in a partner.”

“point taken,” Tucker stopped his fight as he ended up pushing next multip times. Danny and Sam both agreed to pass on the fire emblem charctrers along with young link while Smashing Ganon.

“Mr. Game and Watch.”

“Pass,” Sam said quickly.

“I’d smash. I feel like he could give me a fun time. You saw how he handles that hammer. If I’m lucky he’d use it to pound me,” Danny smiled, making both of his friends laugh.

“You know Danny I agree with that statement and that’s why I’d smash meta knight.”

“To much armor for me,” Danny said, making Tucker snort.

They passed on the Pit’s, kept their same opinion on Samus and landed on Snake.

“Extra Smash!” Danny and Sam agreed.

They kept playing, ending pretty quickly with mostly passes. Danny wanting to smash Bayonets,, Ridley, and King Roll. Sam was agreeing with that list adding Isabella, claiming that she must have some evil dark side to her. This led the group to the pokemon list.

“Do we want to start with Gen 1? Or just go into chaos?” Tucker asked, knowing his friends answers as he got up the list for Gen 9.

“I’m being honest if it’s got three evolutions, I’m most likely not going to smash the first evolution. The second and third are still up for grabs,” Danny set down his rules.

“I can agree with that. So we passing on Sprigatto, Quaxly, and Fuecoco,” Tucker mumbled to himself, making sure to skip thoses options.

“I’m Smashing Floragato, Meowscarda and crocalor from the starters,” Danny stated.

“Chicken,” Sam snorted. “I’ll take your grass started and your fire second evolution and raise you a Quaxwell.”

“I feel like it’s only going to drown into madness from here,” Tucker groaned, knowing it’s not even midnight where Danny is yet and there are nine generations of pokemon.

“How can you not Smash Spidops!” Danny asked frantically.

“Are you kidding? All it does is shot webs. If I wanted to fuck something that shots webs I would fuck spiderman,” Sam rolled her eyes.

“You. . .bring out an excellent point, but I’m not changing my answer!”

“Smashing Arbolliva!” Sam slammed her hand on the desk.

‘Damn girl! I am right here! If you don’t want me then just say it,” Tucker teased her as Danny laughed.

“Smash. Samsh. Smash Ceruledge,” Danny was cheering, Sam cheering with him.

“You know it makes sense that the two of you dated in. highschool, but I can clearly tell why you two were never going to work,” Tucker observed.

“And why is that?” Danny asked, quirking his eyebrow.

“You have to similar of taste.”

“No way in hell you’re actually fucking Grafaiai. Sam do you just have a thing for monkeys or something? “Danny asked.

“I’m not the one who’s ready to throw a party for Toedscruel. I thought we agreed no judging?” She glared.

“Oh know we are judging. I think I’m the one who’s judging the worst,” Tucker laughed.

“That doesn’t count. You only have eyes for Sam. I can’t even recombed a person looks hot and fuckable to you without you saying Sam’s better,” Danny groaned.

“Yep and it’s nice to see that my girlfriend does not have the same standards for me,” Tucker was looking towards her, a playful smile on his lips. He knows she loves him and that he’s not being serious.

“Ah shit guys! I gotta go and get ready for class!” Danny said after hours of playing the smash or pass game. They did eventually make it through all of the Pokémon, but now it was 7 am and Danny had to run to get to campus and stop at his favorite coffee shop.

“Make sure you stay awake dude. If you need to skip class I can write you a doctor’s note,” Tucker said.

“I’ll be fine. I just really don’t want to sleep right now. I should be better by tonight,” Danny said bye to his friends, changing into a different shirt, making sure to grab his jacket, wallet, and keys before leaving his small apartment.

Danny loved living in Gotham, but sometimes the hustle and bustle of the city can be chaotic and stressful, especially on the days when Danny could possibly be late for class, sleep deprived, yet to have his coffee and some report is stopping him to ask him question.

“Opinion of Red Hood?” was the only thing Danny heard the reported ask.

“Smash,” was all Danny could think of as he quickly walked into the coffee shop to get his black coffee with 12 extra expresso shots. Did is taste good? No. Did it wake him up? Absolutely.

Danny didn’t realize the absolute chaos he had caused till he was back home from his classes, Sam and Tucker spamming him with memes of what he did.

Seeing no other option but to go along with it. He found the original clip that tucker sent him a link to, tunrs out the news station put it up on twitter, and re retweeted it with just two words. “I’m right.”

Meanwhile on the other side of Gotham Dick is dying of laughter as he discovered the most hilarious news clip on the planet and proceeded to send it to every single person in his contacts and to every group chat that he’s in, just in case he didn’t have someone’s contact number saved.

He even found the clip being retweeted by the same guy who claims that he’s still right with someone else tagging it #plsdon’tkillhimmr.redhoodsir.

He was making fun of Jason for it especially because turns out his brother knows the guy in real life.

“Grayson what does he even mean when he says smash?” Damain asked as Tim and Dick were making fun of Jason at the cave.

“I have to agree with Damain. The video makes know sense,” Bruce agreed.

“I’m not explaning this,” Tim quickly grabbed his coffee and walked out of the batcave.

“No it!” Jason declared running upstairs, face fully red, Dick not far behind him.

“Why is it always me,” Duke groaned as Bruce wayne lifted a questioning eye brow up at him.

“Please don’t make me explain it,” Duke begged, but sadly when Bruce Wayne wants to know something he will know something.

“Keep making fun of me for this and I will no longer show up to family dinner,” Jason glared at his older brother.

“Aww. You know you can’t avoid Alfred forever,” Dick teased.

“Shit you’re right,” Jason groaned, knowing he was going to have to put up with his brother’s teasing no matter what.

Before anyone knew it Wednesday was upon them, which meant that Danny and Jason finished their only shared class and walked out together to get lunch.

“So did you see your famous news clip?” Jason asked, not able to look Danny in the eye.

“Yeah. I swear this I say the craziest shit when I’m sleep deprived. I stand by what I said though,” Danny got up from the table to grab his order.

“You’re not worried about Red Hood finding out or anything?” Jason asked, seeing a chaotic look within Danny’s eyes.

“Jason, I want nothing more than for Red Hood to come and find me. Hopefully then I’ll get my wish,” Danny smirked up at him, hoping his friend would catch on to the signs.

“Well one can always hope,” Jason gave an awkward laugh as Danny sighed.

Jason may be a bat, but Danny has a feeling that he’s as hopeless as he is when it comes to picking up on romantic cues. At this rate, it’s going to take a miracle to get Jason to realize that yes Danny has feelings for him.

@help-i-need-a-cool-username @spookytragedyshark @weirdfishy @meira-3919 @akikkobara @yjfk@shorterthanadverage@mistyaltair @seraphinedemort@princessdaisysolosyourfaves@idontgetpaidenoughforthisshit@thatonegaybitch68@fuck-you-too-world@stargirl1331@blackrabbitt3t@staresatyoufromaccrosstheroom@f-theworld

I think that was everyone that wanted to be tagged. I personally feel like this could you a second chapter. If I ever do decide to do that then I would definitely add more Jason moments than just having him in here at the last moment.

[ashprompts]

𝐆𝐀𝐌𝐄 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒

a collection of sentence starters from dropout tv's game changer. feel free to alter pronouns/text as you see fit

“I’ve been here THE WHOLE TIME”

“It’s hard to hold this much anger in my body.” 

“If you never hear from me again, you know what to do!.”

“If they don’t find me it’s because I was chopped up and fed to the pigs!”

“I SOLVED YOUR LABYRINTH, PUZZLEMASTER. THE MINOTAUR’S ESCAPED, AND YOU’RE GONNA GET THE HORNS, BUDDY”

“I. CANNOT. WIN!!!!”

“A lot of people have been saying that ___ is a singularly evil, wildly incompetent, befuddled nepo baby silver spoon motherfucker. This is what people are saying.” 

“If you can do ONE swing on the swing I will let you play with all the math puzzles that you want” 

“You’re not getting a FUCKING JOKE OUT OF ME until you let me out of this room! You want bits?! You let me out of this room for bits, motherfucker!”

“Are we gonna die before we get outta here?” 

“I’m gonna lose so fucking hard it’s gonna blow your fucking mind”

“But in this sick rodeo, this bizarre fucked up clown festival, we’re here celebrating what I can only describe as the sickness at the core of America.” 

“Give me the assignment and I don’t miss. I’m gonna DIE before this is over.”

“Your tower’s gonna fall. Laugh it up now.” 

“A river of sweat is running down my back right now.”

“I do hate zombies and I will have nightmares about this tonight. But in this moment I just feel like I’m surrounded by friends.” 

“We don’t give a cum.”

“If you’re in a hole, DYING. I WON’T BE THERE.”

“I showed them my feet, [name]! I SHOWED THEM MY FEET FOR NOTHING?”

“Stop shaking your cock in the middle of a fucking huddle, dude!”

“I’d fuck that pie.”

“If you’re like me, you eat a lot of ass.”

“I hate capitalism but I also hate losing.”

“I get my tongue so far up somebody it’s like I’m tasting their tonsils. I get so deep in there I’m gonna burn myself with stomach acid.”

“I like perching like a little bisexual gargoyle”

“If you were performing on a subway I would take money away from you.”

“I’VE ONLY JUST BEGUN TO PULL THE THREAD ON THIS SWEATER.”

“Icarus flying too close to the sun, but it seems Daedalus our little mastercrafter over here had some WAX WINGS OF HIS OWN, didn’t he? Wanted to see his son fall, faaaalll from the sky, OH HOW CLOSE TO THE SUN HE FLEW”

“Hey can I get an ah? … Don’t scream at me.” 

“You kinda have the vibe that your kids call you by your first name.”

“The day I DON’T curse when a body falls from the sky, call somebody.”

“Could I place an order? I’m hungie. What do you think would be the best pizza to order if I’m quite hungie? Um, I like cheese, what is your largest pizza? Yeah let’s get an extra large because I’m hungie. I’m hungie, I’m hungie, I’m hungie.” 

“WE ARE NOT ANIMALS!!!”

“So long as I am on this stage and drawing breath, you can good and goddamn believe I’ll be trying my best in every challenge.”

“Was it bad that we just started smashing shit?” 

“You didn't count on INGENUITY did you motherfucker?!”

“FIGHT THE BOURGEOISIE. I WILL VENMO YOU $20.” 

“This could be hell. This is very Satre-esque.”

“YOU ARE NOT GOD. THE MACHINE IS GOD.”

“Can you tell us why you’d do this to us?”

“I won’t be made a fool”

“I do feel like I’m in a nightmare”

“I’m the only one OUT of the loop it seems”

“Everybody do the wenis! The wenis is a dance! Everybody is a genius! Who knows it in advance!” 

"DANCE IS A SIN!"

"You think I'm gonna fucking roll over?!"

"It'll be a COLD DAY IN HELL when I go out like a fucking chump!"

"I don't care about winning, I just don't wanna lose"

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Hello! I am SO hyperfixated on the fact that the overblot form CAN be controlled??? That’s the case with Malleus isn’t it? And I guess on one hand I can see how Idia can control it too because of his “curse/blessing” (and sheer will and spite).

Maybe this is foreshadowing that maybe it’s possible for the other OB boys to do so as well???? I don’t know how it’ll work with them but I’m so excited. Overblot cards potential AAAH

I’d love to hear more of your thoughts on this!

[Referencing this post!}

Yeah, I definitely think that OB Idia battle segment opens the floodgates for potential SSR Overblot Troublemaker(s) cards 💀 (RIP to the OB gang fans)

As a refresher for everyone (since it has been a while), alllllll the way back in book 1, Crowley and Cater describe “overblot” as thus: “[… being] overcome by negative energy and[…] losing control of [one’s] magic and emotions,” and “evil berserk mode”.

We’ve seen many examples of these traits in the main story campaign; oftentimes, the OB boy in question is impossible to reason with and has to be subdued via battle. However, it’s important to note that while the OBs may be primarily driven by their emotions, it is not purely rage but rather negative feelings in general. Yes, many OBs (Riddle, Leona, Azul, Vil, etc.) do attack others—but other OBs demonstrate moments of calm (ie when their demands are met). For example, Jamil is tame when he believes he has banished Kalim, secured hypnotized Scarabia mobs, and reigns over the dorm as its new leader. I do believe anger is still a large component of the behavior of one who has overblotted though; that rage most certainly clouds a person’s judgment and compels them to strike out at the slightest thing.

Now, about the idea of “controlling” OBs… I don’t that that can actually be done?? We have to remember that Malleus is a VERY powerful mage—and this alone could give him an “edge” that others don’t when it comes to being fully aware while in OB (though I believe both Malleus and Vil indicate early on they notice their blot building). As Idia’s dad states, Malleus is drawing his magic from nature itself and therefore has a limitless supply it. Secondly, I wouldn’t call Malleus’s OB “controlling” it to begin with. It’s clear that he’s still running high on emotions and is unwilling to hear others out or have them interfere with his plans. These are still traits associated with OB; it’s not as though Malleus is “overriding” the unreasonable thoughts, he is still ruled by them and acts on them. I think what you (maybe?) mean is that Malleus has a much more calculating approach and more precise control over how he wields his power rather than indiscriminately smashing stuff in his path. This, again, could do with his insane power level compared to his peers. Unlike most other OBs, his goal (at least in his own framing) before he overblotted to begin with wasn’t to “take away”, but rather to “gift” happy endings to everyone. This sets him apart just based on interests alone, and that’s perhaps why he acts the most different in the lot.

Now let’s consider the circumstances under which Idia OBs a second time: it’s in a dream, meaning it’s questionable whether or not this would transfer over to real life. Because it’s Idia’s dream, he has more autonomy in it, particularly because he is now “awake”/conscious of the fact that it is a dream. Secondly, Idia bears the Shroud family’s curse/blessing, which allows him to “power up” the more blot is present, as it serves as fuel for his magic. This alone makes him a “special case” which could explain the unusual amount of control he exerts over his OB form. (Again though, I’d wager it’s mostly the dream environment.)

I do see maybe the other OB boys doing a similar “oh, lemme OB to help you guys fight” in a dream situation where there are fewer limits on what they can do, but not in a real world setting. It would put them all at risk anyway, as they lack Idia’s curse/blessing or Malleus’s fae powers. Is that worth the risk, knowing they could all die or potentially turn on their classmates?

I just don’t see OB becoming a “tool” or a magical girl transformation the characters could pull out for combat purposes in the story (though this is possible for like the gameplay outside of the story). I highly doubt OB is like something you could train yourself to control; it’s less like bulking up at the gym and more like pushing yourself to keep exercising while you’re high on adrenaline… Sooner or later, you’d burn out and injure yourself in that overexertion.

If there ever are OB cards, I can easily see them as being the type that don’t come with vignettes because… what reasonable story could you conjure up to explain the OBing again? If there are vignettes, then they most likely won’t fit into the main story canon. You’d have to frame the OB cards as “within the moment” of whatever book they OB’d in, and perhaps go more in-depth about the trauma or something along those lines.

[chaifootsteps]

name them eh? Let’s see where do we start? First off the show is made for the fans like if you’re not a fan from 2014 than you’re not gonna understand anything. They introduce so many characters that you have to be a fan to know the characters and if you don’t than too bad for you. Also the also isn’t about the hotel, or redemption it’s just “Heaven is bad because Christianity is bad, and anyone can be redeemed and old livestream lore from 2017” the world building makes no fucking sense “no one knows how to get into heaven” is so stupid and they’ve just know realized how to kill angels, and they just leave behind the only thing that can kill them. It’s just so bad. The introduce s

The characters are unlikeable empty shells that fans can fill with head canons and if your lucky enough and the creator likes your fan theory she’s totally just gonna steal it and not credit you. Charlie is so bad at her job that she needs everyone to coddle her like a baby and tell her she’s doing a good job. Alastor is a crybaby insecure manlet red slender man that the writer have no idea what to do with and if you cut him out nothing would be lost except you’d probably get a better show. Vaggie had the most potential but she’s just “Charlie’s girlfriend” her character revolved around Charlie and exist for Charlie. It’s unhealthy codependency that the writers try to play off as healthy and the vaggie just needs to trust her girlfriend more. Husk is nonexistent he’s just there to be a dad boyfriend to Angel even though he’s a hypocritical asshole that judges Angel, and everyone in the hotel. I love Keith David but fuck I really don’t like husk. Angel is another character that has so much potential but he just become the creators rape fetish fantasy that she’s to ashamed to admit, why put they in your show and than double down and argue with SA survivors for three fucking days? Lucifer could’ve been an interesting character except viv got Jeremy Jordan and because she a fan of his, she double downed, and just made him a sad dad trying his best. Even though he introduced evil into the world got depressed that he gave people free will but they didn’t conform to what he wanted. That’s not free will that’s control. And “neglected his daughter” even though she never calls him and only calls to ask something from him. Oh and he fucked Adam’s wives

Sir pentious is the ONLY character that’s likeable but gets treated like shit from everyone and when he dies they all start crying and acting like he was thier best friend when no one treated him good, like yall are terrible I wish Adam did kill everyone.

the songs are fine but the songs don’t move the story, or even kick off the story or used for development. It just jukebox songs were the ooomt of the songs are for a smash hit than for storytelling, which is fine but it’s just empty and insipid. So theres a few i could name i could keep going I’d rather not

Knowing this crowd, they almost certainly closed their eyes and covered their ears after "first off."

[voidboymads]

Was looking in my old drafts and found this. Dunno if I’ll work on it anymore but I thought I’d post what’s been written anyway.

————

“A Gargoyle!? Like those stone statue things on Church’s?” The jeep pitched to the left, sending Stiles into Derek’s shoulder. He crashed against him, hard enough to knock some wind from his lungs that yelling wasn’t already doing.

“Yeah those!” Derek yelled back. The jeep pitched to the right and sent Stiles flying into the door, knocking it open. He would have fallen through if Derek hadn’t grabbed at his shirt to pull him back.

Stone-like claws pierced the top of the jeep as the door behind Stiles slammed shut, grappling on the roof like some demon claw game with Stiles and Derek as its prize. “So why the hell is attacking us?” He yelled as Derek tried to unwind the window. The handle broke in his massive hand and Stiles couldn’t help but shoot a look of pure incredulity in his direction.

Derek snarled back and threw the handle onto the floorboard. “I think the more important question is why is it only attacking us?”

“What the hell are you talking about?!”

“Look, Stiles!” And for emphasis, Derek grabbed Stiles head and twisted it enough for him see out the front window. Scott and Lydia were hiding behind an open door of Peter’s car while Peter was yelling something at the both of them.

Stiles couldn’t hear any of it though as the claws of the creature scratched along the metal of his jeep. It jostled the entire thing, tires lifting and crashing down on the road they were on, screeching something awful overhead. “You didn’t unearth some ancient evil did you?” Stiles yelled back at Derek and Derek had just enough time to shoot Stiles an irritated look before the window behind him smashed to pieces. “Derek!”

Stiles reached for him just as claws snatched onto Derek’s shoulders. Derek roared as they dug into him and when Stiles grabbed ahold of his hand, he took it and held on. Stiles planted his feet wide on the floor board, trying his hardest to keep Derek inside the cab of the jeep.

He glanced over at Scott and them, wondering breifly why they were just standing there, staring, when he noticed their gazes drifting upward far above where the creature was attacking the roof of the jeep. It must have meant there was more of them, but how many he couldn’t be certain. Not inside fighting to hang on to Derek.

Derek’s grip on Stiles’ arm started to slip and Stiles suspected he was doing it on purpose. Some self sacrificing thing to keep Stiles safe while he was pulled away by monsters. “No!” Stiles yelled, directed more at Derek than anything else.

Then the jeep began to rise off the ground and Stiles knew they were truly fucked. He gripped Derek’s arm with both hands, fingers struggling to hold on as he dug them into Derek’s flesh. The jeep was too far up in the air for a safe landing now and Stiles was determined to hang in there. If they were going to take Derek, they’d better damn well take him and the jeep too.

The window behind Stiles bursted, shards flying along his back and one stony claw slashed at Stiles��� shoulder. It was enough to force him to let go of Derek, pain flaring instantly as he cried out.

“Stiles!” Derek yelled as he was yanked from the jeep and before Stiles could have a moment to react, to protect himself or brace himself from the fall, the jeep crashed back down to earth and smashed against the road.

Stiles blacked out the moment the jeep the ground.

[serial-serializednovelreader]

It's crazy to me that people call Jonathan a himbo, he's so methodical and clever! It makes sense that Mina would be attracted to someone bright too

Yes, anon, you’re so speaking my language!!! I do wish people would stop calling Jonathan a himbo because — nothing against himbos — but Jonathan is not one of them! And yes, it totally makes sense that Mina would attracted to someone as clever as him, and since she’s also so smart, I’m sure the feeling is mutual.

Before y’all come shouting in my inbox “what do you have against himbos??” and “Jonathan is totally a himbo, what are you talking about?” Let me clear things up:

First of all, I love himbos!!! Kronk from Emperor’s New Groove — peak himbo, imo — is one of my favorite characters. Am I attracted to them? Well…no. As you can probably tell from my last Nova’s Notes, I’m more the kind of person who’s attracted to cleverness or when people nerd out. BUT I cherish himbos for all of their wonderful qualities and if I ever get the opportunity to meet one in real life, I would love to be friends with them! <3333

Secondly, for anyone who’s still saying Jonathan is a himbo…

Himbos have to embody all three qualities equally to be considered himbos! If they are not kind? Not a himbo. Not strong? Not a himbo, I’m sorry! I do make the rules of himbo, I simply follow the rules.

Now on to our good friend Jonathan Harker’s case.

He is undeniably kind. From what we’ve seen so far (not to mention later), he is not only loving to his fiancée, he is kind to strangers as well. He takes gifts from the villagers, even if he does not understand them. Just a couple of entries ago, he was willing to risk his life over a child he didn’t even know (and the same night after he had screamed running away from the women, too). Some of the Dracula Daily book club on here suspects (as do I) that some of the reason he’s so eager to spring into action the next day is to put a stop to Dracula’s evilness for other people, not just for himself. Heck, he’s even talked about Dracula’s good qualities after finding out he’s a prisoner!!! So, kindness? Yes! ✅

As for strong, there’s not as much evidence here, but I would call him somewhat strong because not just anyone could successfully scale a castle wall twice in one day like that! That takes a lot of strength in your core, arms, back, etc. Sure, Dracula can do it — but Dracula is also a vampire with super strength. Maybe it’s easier than I think it is, but I’m not exactly going to look for a castle to try it!! So for Jonathan to crack his knuckles and go “yeah, he can do it, why can’t I?” is both hilarious and shows that he must know something of his own strength. However, he’s also a solicitor and I doubt he’s built like a bodybuilder. So, strong? Maybe not as much as a typical himbo, but let’s give him the check mark because Lizard Fashion is nothing to sneeze at. ✅

Now for the ditzy part….I’d have to say no to that. Himbos are meant to not be “the sharpest tool in the shed” (yes, I did have to hit you with a Smash Mouth reference, sorry not sorry) and Jonathan is farrrrr from that.

Everything he has done so far has been methodical and smart. I covered this in my other Nova’s Notes (you can look under the hashtag on my page if you want to see more :D) so I really don’t want to go through too much I’ve already gone through, but the arguments I’ve seen for him being a himbo — based on the entries we’ve already read — are that he’s not smart because he:

Doesn’t heed villager’s warnings

“Let’s” himself become a prisoner

Is nice to Dracula after he knows he’s a prisoner

Talks about his fiancée a lot (???????)

For the first point, we’ve gone over this, but here we go again — he doesn’t heed the villager’s warnings, no. But keep in mind none of them actually say “The Count is a super dangerous man!! Don’t trust him!!!” Here’s the passage:

“When I asked him if he knew Count Dracula, and could tell me anything of his castle, both he and his wife crossed themselves, and, saying that they knew nothing at all, simply refused to speak further. It was so near the time of starting that I had no time to ask any one else, for it was all very mysterious and not by any means comforting.

Just before I was leaving, the old lady came up to my room and said in a very hysterical way:

‘Must you go? Oh! young Herr, must you go?’ She was in such an excited state that she seemed to have lost her grip of what German she knew, and mixed it all up with some other language which I did not know at all. I was just able to follow her by asking many questions. When I told her that I must go at once, and that I was engaged on important business, she asked again:

‘Do you know what day it is?’ I answered that it was the fourth of May. She shook her head as she said again:

‘Oh, yes! I know that! I know that, but do you know what day it is?’ On my saying that I did not understand, she went on:

‘It is the eve of St. George's Day. Do you not know that to-night, when the clock strikes midnight, all the evil things in the world will have full sway? Do you know where you are going, and what you are going to?’ She was in such evident distress that I tried to comfort her, but without effect. Finally she went down on her knees and implored me not to go; at least to wait a day or two before starting. It was all very ridiculous but I did not feel comfortable.

So here’s the thing: you can see that the only thing the innkeeper’s wife explicitly warns him against is going to the castle that night because it’s a day in their culture where evil spirits are considered to have full sway.

The innkeeper’s wife does ask him if he knows “where he is going and who is going to” — he says no, but she does not speak further on the matter. When he asked about the Count before this, they just refused to speak! I know that may seem like an implicit warning — and it is — but some people on here act as if Jonathan was supposed to have known why they were crossing themselves and immediately have left? Like, he obviously feels uncomfortable, but as he states before and afterwards: he has a job to do. If you were in his position: a newly-appointed lawyer (or position of your choice), and you went to a place where the locals told you not to visit your client that night because it was a night where evil spirits would come out: would you honestly believe them? And if you asked about what your client was like and they just crossed themselves and refused to speak on the matter, would you simply leave the town and tell your boss “nah, sorry, the villagers warned me against him. I decided this client’s not for me”? I guess that honestly depends on you, but I would think not if you want to keep your job!! I know that’s not ideal, but to be fair, he also is not given a fair warning before going in.

There is also that incident in the carriage where he hears those villagers talking and he picks up bits and pieces (including the words werewolf and vampire) but a) they’re not talking to him and b) he doesn’t pick up enough to even indicate who they’re talking about!! In fact, he thinks they’re badmouthing him!!! (Which is understandable, he can only hear a bit and he’s translating on the fly). Again, how he is supposed to automatically know: “oh, Count Dracula is a vampire and I must flee this place immediately.” We know that because Dracula has been a pop culture icon for 100+ years, but Jonathan doesn’t have that kind of knowledge. I feel it’s kind of ridiculous to call him not smart for not knowing this.

However, and this is important, he does take some of this warning to heart. He does take the crucifix and the other vampire-repellent gifts the villagers bestow upon him, despite his skepticism and ignorance of the culture (thanks, English colonization /s). He feels uncomfortable and anxious before he even goes into the castle, literally saying goodbye to Mina in his diary in case he doesn’t make it back!! He keeps the crucifix in his room and uses it to ward off bad dreams and for safety against Dracula (which is not really how he’s supposed to use it, but he wasn’t really told how, so I don’t really blame him for that).

I don’t think a himbo would’ve picked up that something was amiss at any of these points, not until it was too late at least. I think for this test, just picture Kronk (or your fav himbo) in this situation. Would they even notice something was up? Or would they go cheerfully towards the castle?

As for the second point — this is kind of unrelated to the himbo question but — what kind of victim-blame mentality is this????? I have seen people unironically (at least I’m pretty sure it is?) post that Jonathan deserves the abuse he’s getting because he didn’t heed the villager’s warnings (which I already talked about above) and/or he’s “rude” to Dracula. I’m sorry — WHAT???? So if you’re rude to somebody they’re to allowed to lock you up in their castle???? That’s a fair trade? I beg your pardon?! Just…ok. Believe what you want, but maybe let’s not blame the guy who’s been a prisoner in a random stranger’s castle for a month and is sure he’s about to die? Yes, this is fictional and not that deep, but still — weird take.

Back to the himbo question, I mean, he doesn’t really let himself become a prisoner. He’s at Dracula’s castle for a job. Once he’s done with that job he’s ready to leave, but Dracula makes him stay because he literally locks him in!!! He then explicitly tells him he will stay longer and Jonathan has to accept because he is there in place of his boss, and saying no would be like speaking (negatively) for his boss — and Jonathan is not going to do that. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I don’t think a himbo would be able to see all of that subtext within that conversation. I actually don’t know this kind of interaction between a true himbo and Dracula would go, but I imagine not well. Dracula thrives off of interesting conversation and wit, as well as being able to maintain a facade of host and guest. I just don’t see if someone like Kronk could maintain that for long because he would probably be like “but I don’t want to stay longer, let me go” or something, which would end the “game”.

Moving on to the third point, he is nice to Dracula after he knows he’s a prisoner for a reason. When he realizes he’s locked up (which he realizes super fast, by the way), he sits down and has a good, long think about what he can do. More passage evidence!

“I am thinking still, and as yet have come to no definite conclusion. Of one thing only am I certain; that it is no use making my ideas known to the Count. He knows well that I am imprisoned; and as he has done it himself, and has doubtless his own motives for it, he would only deceive me if I trusted him fully with the facts. So far as I can see, my only plan will be to keep my knowledge and my fears to myself, and my eyes open. I am, I know, either being deceived, like a baby, by my own fears, or else I am in desperate straits; and if the latter be so, I need, and shall need, all my brains to get through.”

So he knows Dracula is up to something (or he’s jumped to conclusions) and either way, talking about it is a bad idea. The only way through is to act like nothing’s wrong for now and try to get information out of Dracula. Other than that, he’s going to need to use his brains! Yes, he does talk to Dracula and acts nice — but it’s with a plan and a purpose. Dracula has creeped him out from the start, but he has always been able to maintain good cheer around him. Now, he will put that to use.

So for this himbo test, it’s kind of similar to the second one. Were Kronk in this situation, he would make it by for a while because he probably wouldn’t notice the doors are locked. But once he did…I’m not sure if it would be like the second point where he’d immediately tell Dracula “hey why are all of the doors locked” and the game is up or if his shoulder angel/devil characters would come out to help him. I guess it depends! And to Kronk’s credit, he has figured things out before (e.g. figured out who Pacha was and in relation to Kuzco) *but* it took him like 12 hours after the fact and that’s not how Jonathan operates. Jonathan figures out things pretty quickly. Does he need time to think sometimes? Yes. But he’s pretty much always thinking and trying to figure out more once he’s at Castle Dracula. I just don’t see these two in the same vein here.

For the final point, I haven’t seen much evidence for this, but it needs to be addressed. I think sometimes people tend to equate WifeGuy with “no thoughts, head empty only for wife” and that can be true!!! There are definitely characters like that and I do love them so. Jonathan is undeniably a WifeGuy (and Mina’s not even his wife in name yet), bringing her up anytime he gets a chance. I would argue though that just because he’s in love and brings her up a ton doesn’t mean he’s also not clever and methodical. You can be in love and smart: these can coexist. Mina is a very smart character from what we’ve seen already and she’s in love too!

I don’t really have a Kronk case study for this one, but like anon said — I think Mina is attracted to Jonathan for his smartness and it goes both ways. They love each other for many other reasons (there’s a lot to love!), but I imagine that’s kind of the cherry on top for them.

Why does this matter? I think calling Jonathan a himbo is reducing his character a bit here. Again, I’m not saying being a himbo is bad, but it does discredit his methodical ways and strategy he has in the castle. His methodical nature is part of personality and pretending that doesn’t exist erases his character, in my opinion. Additionally, it raises the question: could a himbo become a lawyer? I…don’t think so…but maybe? Find me a himbo who’s a lawyer and prove me wrong I guess! Wait is Phoenix Wright a himbo…? Question for another time.

In conclusion, Jonathan Harker only passes 1 part of the himbo test (kindness) with flying colors. The strong test he only passes by the tail of his lizard fashion, and as for ditzy? He fails miserably. Recall that for someone to be a true himbo, they have to possess all three traits equally. Even if you could make the case for one, you’d still be missing another. So, no, I don’t think Jonathan Harker is a himbo. You can maybe argue with me that he has himbo moments (if that’s a thing, idk), but overall? No.

[callmelittlebuttercup]

Peace Offerings Pt. 15

Pairing: Joel Miller x F!Reader

Chapter Summary: As they make their way back to Jackson, Reader tries to process the loss of her brother. Joel makes a confession to her that reminds her she's not alone, and she finally comes clean about what happens. The two continue to grow closer as they navigate their grief.

Chapter warnings: Processing of grief/loss, mentions of cannibalism and SA, descriptions of meat (idk if this is weird but I'd want a warning LOL), fluff.

Masterlist

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Part Fifteen

I sat in the bed of a truck on the highway and stared at the ground as Joel searched the abandoned cars and trucks for anything we could find for the journey back to Jackson.  I picked at the dead, bloodstained skin around my fingernails as my feet swung back and forth in front of me. The sun was warm on the back of my head but the air was still chilled from the past snow. I was pulled from my dissociative state by Joel calling out my name. I whirled around to see him walking towards me with a grimace on his face from the blinding sun. “Did you hear me?” He asked. “No. What?” I responded weakly. “Well I found this in there. Beefaroni, Chef Boyardee.” He said as he held up a worn out can. “Oh… Cool.” I said as enthusiastically as possible. He hesitated before pulling out another box and moving closer to me. “Alright. We’re making good time. We should try to cover as much as we can before it gets dark.” He said as he handed me the can to put in his bag that I’d been guarding. I nodded, “Got it.” 

As we walked, Joel continued to fill the silence, “Think they had a guitar in that RV. Was all smashed up but- got me thinkin’... Maybe I should find one. I haven’t played in forever.” I looked at him. My surprise was muted, but still genuine. “You played guitar?” He nodded and turned his gaze up ahead. “I’ve always wanted to learn how to play.” I said quietly, almost purposefully so that wouldn’t hear me, but he did. “I could teach you… If you’d still want to when we get back.” He offered awkwardly. I felt the warmth of a blush reaching my cheeks, “I’d like that.” 

Despite our innocent and light conversation, there was still a heaviness between us. Joel obviously knew something had happened in that restaurant but he was dancing around that fact. I couldn’t blame him because I was too. I wanted to tell him what happened, but I didn’t know how to start. There was no easy or comforting way to say “My brother was chopped into little pieces and fed to cannibals by an evil cult leader then that same man tried to violate me as the building burnt down around us.” Joel and I had no choice but to be vulnerable with each other at times, but this felt different. This was a whole other level that went above being drunk around him, or almost dying on him multiple times. This wasn’t something one of his peace offerings could fix. This was something he would just have to let run its course. 

As the scenery changed from highway to a university campus, he began to speak again. He blurted out his ideas for making our way through, and I nodded along, barely retaining anything but I knew I would be okay as long as I stayed close behind. 

We came upon tents that had medical symbols on them, and Joel said aloud, “Emergency medical camps. They obviously didn’t last. They had me in one just like this.” I looked around before returning my gaze to him, “With Sarah?” He shook his head, “No she was gone already.” I nodded before questioning again, “What were you in here for?” I turned around, realizing he’d stopped in his tracks a few paces ago. His head was turned towards the ground and he mumbled, “‘Member when I said I’d almost lost my life when my daughter died?” My heart dropped as I predicted what he was about to say. He sat down on a concrete block feet away from him, and I moved to perch myself next to him. I stared at him intently, showing him I was listening. “There’s no story,” He said dismissively before continuing, “Sarah died and I couldn’t see the point anymore. Simple as that. And I wasn’t scare either… I was ready. But when I-” he pause and made an unreadable gesture with his hands, “When I went to pull the trigger, I flinched. Still don’t know why.” 

I was speechless. I felt like I’d known what his story was all this time, but hearing him tell it outright was all the more painful. I sat there and my hand instinctively moved to rest on his knee. His hand slid on top of mine and squeezed gently. My eyes began to swim with tears as I leaned my head into him. “Well I’m glad… that didn’t work out.” I whimpered, my voice thick with tears. I couldn’t see his face, but I could hear the same thickness in his voice as he responded, “Me too.” Before we could get too emotional, I wiped the stray tear off of my cheek and sat up. “We should probably get going.” I choked. He nodded as we both stood and continued our trekk through the campus. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After walking absentmindedly for what seemed like hours, Joel called out from ahead of me, “We should see if this house is clear and rest for the night.” I nodded and followed after him towards the front steps. He went in before me and cleared both floors before waving me in. 

David had taken my bag from me, so I watched as Joel dropped his on the ground and began to rummage through it. “Hungry?” He asked as he pulled out a package of jerky and flung it my way. Again, I should have been hungry, but the thought of eating made me sick to my stomach. I shook my head and slid down the wall before leaning my head back against it with a thump. His stare lingered as I did so, and I could feel the weight of the questions he was begging to ask. 

I still didn’t have the energy to formulate an explanation, but after his confession to me earlier, I felt like I owed to him. His concern for me was also obvious in his furrowed eyebrows and clenched jaw. I cleared my throat and rubbed the fabric of my jeans between my fingers before speaking, “He didn’t… do what it looked like he did. If that’s what you’re worried about.” I uttered uncomfortably. Joel’s jaw clenched even harder and he nodded, “Good.” 

He bit off a piece of jerky before pushing the package towards me. I picked it up and stared at the dark brown, scaly strips of meat. My hand started to tremble and I became ill at the sight of it. I tossed it back at him and folded my knees against my chest as my hot tears formed in my eyes. He stared at me with the same look of concern on his face, only more intense. I sighed and prepared myself to explain. “That group… they were-“ He cut me off, “Cannibals. I know.” I looked at him briefly and nodded before speaking again, “and the leader, David said that they…” I swallowed down the bile in my throat before continuing, “He insinuated that they ate him. Ate Matthew.” I stuttered. His face dropped and his chewing halted. The piece of jerky in his hand fell to the floor with a soft thud. “My god..” he stuttered as he dropped his head into his hands.

 A few moments passed as we quietly rested in the moonlit cabin. Night had fallen, but I figured it was pointless to try to sleep. David’s chilling words played over and over in my head. “Let’s just say… his life will help many others to prosper.”  Each time his voice would echo through, another wave of queaziness would hit. As much as I would have liked to process my brother’s death, I desperately needed another distraction. 

 “How did you know they were cannibals?” I asked as soon as the question popped into my brain. “I… questioned* a few people when I was tryin’ to find you.” He answered. The way he paused before saying “questioned” let me know that the actual situation was not as formal. “You questioned people?” I repeated. He nodded, keeping his lips in a tight line. “Well… more like interrogated.” He finally admitted. “Did these people survive the interrogation?” I asked, partially from curiosity and the concern of someone seeking revenge on Joel for killing more members or David’s cult. “Don’t know,” he said, “Soon as they pointed to where you were on the map I took it and ran.” Despite its heaviness, my heart fluttered at Joel’s words. I was still adjusting to having another person looking out for me, especially with the fact that it was Joel, the man I never expected to become this close to. 

“You should try to get some sleep.” He said, quickly changing the subject. I shook my head, feeling the heat of tears forming behind my eyes. The thought of laying down and becoming vulnerable again terrified me. It wasn’t that I didn’t trust Joel to keep watch, it was the fact that every time I blinked I saw the sick look on that vile man’s face as he unbuttoneed his pants. I knew, if I could even get a wink of sleep, that he would come back to haunt me in my nightmares. 

“It’s okay, I promise I’ll keep watch. I have coffee.” He said again, trying to convince me. “No… You don’t understand.” I whimpered. His silence and empathetic stare had pulled me to a huge realization. It was then that I remembered our conversation earlier. Joel had suffered a loss just as great, if not greater. Joel had lost his daughter. “How did you do it?” I asked, my voice becoming hoarse from tears. “Do what?” He questioned weakly. “How did you get through it?” My vision of him was shrouded by darkness, but I heard his breath catch in his throat. I chewed at the inside of my cheek as I desperately awaited his advice. As if all of the emotions I was feeling were gushing out of me from an open wound, and his words would be the sutures that would aid my survival. “I know it was dark at first… you told me. But you got through it. Please tell me how.” I begged. “ I learned that you keep going for those who are still here, for those who still need you. For me, back then, it was family. You and I may not be family, but we’re here for each other. That’s got to count for something.” 

I sucked in a deep breath as his words blanketed me. Joel alone would most definitely not fill the void of my beloved brother entirely, but he was here vowing to help me through the loss of him. He cared about me, and regarded my life as he did his own family’s, and I’d begun to function the same way. I had him and he had me. 

“Thank you, Joel.” I said quietly. Instead of a verbal response, I heard shuffling along the floorboards, and then felt his back hit the wall next to mine. I placed a hand out onto the floor to feel where he was, and made contact with his pant leg. His calloused hand wrapped around mine and pull it to rest on his knee as he squeezed it gently. My weary head dropped down to rest on his firm, yet comforting shoulder. “I’ve got you.” He whispered before leaning his head down and gently touching it to mine. “I’ve got you too.” I whispered back. The exhaustion of the day weighed my eyelids down. Joel’s words and the comfort of his touch made me feel safe enough to close them. 

That night, I was safe from David, from infected, and any other threats. My dreams were filled with my best memories of Matthew. The strawberry plants again, painting over our crayon drawings on the walls of our rooms before we moved out of our childhood home, his high school graduation, prank calling our friends and so much more. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~

a/n: I have a confession to make: I definitely might have been sweating from my eyes while writing the last part.:’)  We needed some fluff and healing after all of the angst as well as in preparation for what is ahead. As always, let me know what you think and thank you thank you thank you for reading and for all of the support !! See you next Monday. <3

“*”: This line is most definitely referring to the “WHAT TOWWWNNNN”  scene in episode 9. If you don’t know what I’m talking about look it up bc it’s important (and hot.) 

Masterlist | Next Part

Taglist (plus ppl I think would like it.) :

@demonsasss @ashleyfilm @ayamenimthiriel @scarlet-daisy @jellybeanxc @briyannaholt @hujickova @morgaussy @vivian-pascal

[dailyadventureprompts]

What’s fasinating about the d&d movie is that it is all the fun of d&d removed from the rigid restraints of the the clunky game system: Thrills and laughs and hairbrained schemes minus the minutia of needless rolls or waiting for your turn in initiative to circle around. Part of this is idealization, but as someone who’s obsessed with making my favorite game system the most fun possible I can’t help but draw some comparisons.

Combat: Holga’s fight scenes were a highlight of the film for me, displaying a huge amount of kinetic creativity as she pinballed between different combatants swapping out weapons, bouncing off the surrounding terrain . This is a far, far cry from how being a fighter plays out at the table, as most martial characters are focused into doing just one type of attack as good as they can because it’s their only reliable contribution to combat. Try to model Holga’s fights in game and you’d be caught in a boring slog of dealing 1d4+STR damage to a bunch of guards whittling away at their hitpoint pools, a far cry from the lighting quick flury of smashing, bashing, and flips that make her the film’s action setpiece.  

What d&d needs is a system for combat that exists alongside the traditional damage/HP paradigm: an additional layer of complexity for martial characters that encourages tactical thinking and lets those who do their damage up close feel just as cool and as clutch as casters. My mind’s already whirling thinking up something that revolves around stuns, suckerpunches, and positioning, so expect it later this week. 

Powercreep: This might be subjective but I find it fascinating that the official stats put out for the party has them hovering around level 16, a point in character progression  a)that  most characters never get to b) by which the game’s difficulty systems have begun to break down. I suspect this was done in order to keep their on-screen abilities in line with how they are in the base rules, but I can’t help but feel like its odd for the “idedalized” dnd experiance to be playing around with toys that most groups will never get their hands on. 

In my experience d&d is on a sliding scale of stakes V Shenanigans, with the exact ballance evolving over the course of a campaign:  Your group starts out as a bunch of dumbfucks and at some point while you’re making  making absolute fools out of yourselves you become a found family just in time for the consequences of your actions to circle back around and threaten the realm. First the characters start caring about eachother, then they care about the world, then they have to save that world. Level 16 is, for me, distinctly in “save the world” territory, despite the fact that the HaT crew are clearly still figuring out who they are and what they care about.  It makes me wish D&D was more free with its shenanigan enabling magic/items/class features at lower levels to help fuel these kinds of antics.  

Attunement: Perhaps the best “ oh I’m totally going to steal this” moment came from Simon’s attempt to attune to the helm of disjunction. Turning what was otherwise a rote game mechanic into an oppertunity for character growth was genius on behalf of the writers, though one I’d only really employ with items that were as necessary for my plots as the helm was for the heist. Just like Simon’s major flaw was self doubt, I could easily see delicious storytelling potential in throwing up other emotional hurdles depending on the situation: A hero’s sword refusing to attune to the haunted survivor until they’ve come to terms with what they’ve done, an otherwise altruistic character being forced to admit their sin and self interest by an evil-aligned artifact. 

Over all, I really enjoyed the movie, though paradoxically It didn’t hook me as much because for me one of the biggest charms of fantasy is the feeling of discoverying a new world, and I’ve been living the d&d world for the past 20 years so it didn’t come of as wild and magical as it could have been, having hewn so close to established d&d material. 

[wikitpowers]

I think it would be SO funny for no reason if Lucifer is in a human form the first time the main cast see him and later Kit is texting in the groupchat like "ok but why was satan kind of 😳😳😳 tho"

KIT WOULD DEFINITELY BE TEXTING THAT TO THE GROUP CHAT AND EVERYBODY WOULD BE LIKE SATAN?????? LIKE LUCIFER MORNINGSTAR SATAN??????? ARE U GOOD??????

and then dru would be like honestly yeah i’d smash

but seriously, i actually imagine lucifer to be so hot and i have no shame about it. like bro has gotta be majestic (evil and twisted af but majestic nonetheless), what's the bet the whole twp gang think he's well fit :')))

[projectmoon-smash-or-pass]

propaganda:

❓ "smash kromer, pass on the dreamer of human wholeness. i love horrible girls and i'm normally down for monsterfucking but i simply could not deal with the vagina of arms and teeth. (i voted smash anyway because i love her)"

✅ "I WILL stick my dick in crazy"

✅ "I love a woman who can kill me on site"

✅ "I’d regret it in the morning, like drinking an entire bottle of vodka in one weekend. Still would though, but only in the context of a one night thing, and I make sure I don’t accept any coins from her (and I’d be looking over my shoulder for a while)"

❌ "I saw Kromer in my dream once. It was the closest thing I've had to a nightmare in a long time"

❌ "Passing on kromer for being ableist."

❌ "i gotta pass on kromer. her ableism cult nonsense is a huge turn off"

✅ "one time I had a dream that she made Sinclair drink a horrible concoction of various condiments at a fast food restaurant. Smash btw"

❌️ "Kromer and Demian are the biggest beef i have with sinclair. man has absolutely tragic taste in partners. not that i have absolutely no idea why he or anyone else would be into them, but holy shit dude, it's like critically failing a vibe check is a prerequisite. which is fair, but no, you cannot catch my ass smashing either"

❌️ "passing on kromer because im not into younger women. I know she watches videos at full volume with no headphones on the subway. she juuls outta both mouths."

✅️ "i want kromer to Deep Thrust me"

❌️ "Kromer has the single most godawful haircut in the entire city"

✅️ "smash kromer and hope she fucks up my hair like hers afterward. i want her big nail in me"

❓"you WILL get pegged if you try."

❌️ "Honestly would throw dongrang and kromer in a room and make them fight to the death in order to get smash chosen (the winner gets thrown into a pit of eels)"

✅️ "god i would do anything for kromer my evil sweaty girlfailure. i would smash her marry her then divorce her and take the house and her bong"

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

Okay here I am again because the Grima brainrot is particularly intense rn and I just saw a post talking about.

Grima but as a woman. Like genderbend. Nothing changes, same looks, same personality, same behaviour, same ambiguous feelings for Eowyn. (I’d smash.)

I think it’s actually interesting considering that Grima’s flaws in the movies/books are hinted also to be rooted from his “unmanliness” (as Tolkien presents a lot of characters with honour and values considered “male”.)

But I think that even if he were to be a woman, there is a great deal of traits Grima wouldn’t possess to be considered conventionally “feminine” by Tolkien’s and many’s standards. (Such as beauty for example).

So yeah, it just occurred to me and now I’ve been thinking about this since 3am. This is the reason why I’m pansexual. We don’t care about gender. We care about silly evil pookies okay.

As always have a great day/night ! ^^

Yesssss!

Grima & Gender is a super interesting thing that I think about all the time. I love thinking about him and manliness, femininity, secret third and fourth options etc.

I know I reblogged the ask/reply that I had about Grima on Gender and Magic, so you have the gist of most of my thoughts as it relates to Grima performing gender (or not, as the case may be) within the context of masculinity.

But Grima straight up as a woman would be very interesting. Particularly because Rohan is quite gendered when it comes to the wielding of power - and quite binary in who wields what power.

(E.g., when Theoden departs Edoras to fight Saruman, he despairs over leaving the city leaderless because Eomer won't stay behind. It doesn't occur to him that Eowyn is even an option until Hama suggests it.)

Therefore, Grima being in a position of power that is traditionally masculine would be very interesting. Indeed, her entire performance of gender would likely be impacted by the uniqueness of her position. Queens, historically, were more passive in Rohan than in other countries so it's not like she would have someone to model herself on. Nor would there be a model for other people on how to receive and perceive Grima.

(Morwen, maaaaaybe, but honestly her epithet of Steelsheen is more about her appearance than anything else. Though perhaps her personality could be inferred from it... But truly, we only know her in the context of being wife and mother.)

Given the absence of models, would Grima into the more masculine aspects of how people would be reading her? Would she do the whole performance of "I may have the body of a woman but I've the head and heart of a man"? Or would she hyper-perform the femininity song and dance as a way to balance it out/make her more palatable to some?

Aside from the occupying a masculine position of power within the context of Rohan's society, Grima's other personality and physical traits would absolutely count against her being seen as appropriately feminine.

Good qualities for a Rohirrim woman to have is height, slenderness, fairness of face, and youthfulness. Grima's tall...and that's all she's got going for her.

Grima is also neither high-hearted nor noble in bearing let alone in birth (because nobility of birth is very important to one's perceived Goodness and Worth in Tolkien's world).

Grima is a sneak, a liar, a thief, and power hungry. Grima would be, fundamentally, a Woman Who Wants Something. And what she wants are things women shouldn't want.

Wanting Things in general, for both men and women, is a dangerous game to play in Middle Earth and the texts punish many of the people who do any major "unacceptable" desiring (or creating) of things outside their purview.

Grima's obvious foil, Eowyn, is a prime example. Eowyn wants to be a warrior, she wants to be queen, she wants to be part of the Gondor noble family (and assume the power and privilege that comes with that), she wants to be seen and heard and to have an impact on the fate of the world.

Some of her wanting was out of a selfless desire to save her home and her people, but a lot was also just her having dreams and desires.

Eowyn may have been named as Shieldmaiden of Rohan but it is evident that this was meant as an honorific that wasn't meant to be actually acted upon. Save, of course, in the gravest/most dire circumstances when all is lost and only women remain to defend the land because the men are dead. This is, indeed, the gist of the conversation she has with Aragorn and you can see her resentment and anger about what her expected role is to be compared to that of her brother and the other men in her life.

I think the fact that Eowyn reflects, in many ways, the ideal of womanhood is what saves her from being punished too hard. Eowyn is tall, fair, slender, young, high-hearted, daughter of kings, and has selfless and noble motives (alongside the more human ones).

She is allowed her transgression. She gets her great moment of battle against the witch-king. She gets to make her mark, to save people, to change history.

But, she also receives a bit of a personality transplant as a result of it. She gets to be a wife - but not a queen. She gets to be a mother who heals people. She gets to be a Proper Noble Woman and live, once again, in a gilded cage. The very thing she was so furious about initially.

I know there is the idea that she is healed and she has overcome her anger and has changed - but it still feels like the text punished her and robbed her. Of course, a huge part of the problem is that Eowyn is the only women we spend any real time with - if we had more women with diverse journeys and endings, it would be different.

It's subconscious to a certain degree, I think, also heavily informed by Tolkien's Catholicism alongside the culture of the time. The importance of the Marian archetype of womanhood etc. And we know Tolkien loved Eowyn's character and thought about her a lot, wanted to write a good story for her, but some of that stuff sneaks in regardless.

But all of this to say - if that is Eowyn's ending...what would happen to Grima? One who would be committing greater transgressions against gender performance let alone the whole Light Soupçon of Treason.

Because aside from wanting material wealth and power, we know that Grima potentially desires Eowyn. In the movie it's explicit but the books are more ambiguous. We are told, via Gandalf, that Eomer was concerned about Grima ogling his sister and threatened to kill him over it. Crucially, we never hear from Grima about this specific item and we certainly never hear from Eowyn.

Indeed, Gandalf's line to Eomer about how his sister is "safe now" says far more about Eomer's fears and concerns than it does about the reality of the situation. We know in ROTK that Eomer didn't know his sister's heart or mind - he didn't know she was unhappy with her position in the household and broader society, he didn't know she wa so angry and resentful, he didn't know she was in emotional pain, he didn't know what she wanted, he didn't know jack. Therefore can we think him reliable when it comes to being a fountain of knowledge about his sister's desires?

I mean...considering no one was paying much attention to her, and when they did they were reading their own things onto her (coughEomercough), perhaps Eowyn liked having Grima pay attention to her? Like, who knows. Someone who may have seen her and may have known what her fears and desires were might have been novel/nice (before she realized he's selling everyone out for a corn chip). Heck, Gandalf implies that Grima had a pretty good handle on Eowyn's innermost dreams and wishes, so take that as you will.

(I now have this image in my head of Eowyn and Grima getting wine drunk out back of Meduseld and bitching about people.)

All pure idle speculation for the sake of pot-stirring. Anyway, I keep getting distracted.

Grima as a woman feeling lust, though - that would be another strike against her. Honourable love and the implied desire that might exist because of it is fine. But in the text overt desire of a clearly sexual nature is presented in a mostly negative light. Let alone, in this speculation, Grima is lusting after another woman! That's even more unnatural and contrary! What a freak /sarcasm.

Then there's the cowardice - which is shown as a negative no matter who is displaying it. Though, I think of all the aspects of Grima, this is the one that would get more of a pass as a woman than as a man.

So yeah - given that Grima's entire personality is one that is contrary to what is modeled as Good Femininity it would be very interesting to see how it played out over the course of the text.

Everything from the banishment, which was predicated on Grima being expected to do battle alongside Theoden in order to prove that he is still loyal - what test of loyalty would Grima as a woman be expected to perform and then fail because she's too chickenshit?

The relationship with Saruman would be construed in a different way, also the hold Grima had over Theoden - that would take on different implications. And those implications would also change how Theoden is perceived, too, which is interesting.

That Theoden is leaning on a woman for support in ruling would make him seem even weaker and more foolish. It would be so interesting to see it unfold!

Then there's the rivalry with Gandalf - the positioning of them as two sides of the Odinnic coin.

Also the being tortured and tormented by Saruman after Helm's Deep. Not to mention the Scouring of the Shire and Grima's ultimate end. If Grima is a woman, in this, I think Tolkien would have had her ending be different.

----

Alright, I've banged on for way, way too long about this and went no where in particular, and all has been said before in different ways so I'm not landing on anything new or insightful.

Just wittering...I love wittering about Grima so thank you for giving me the opportunity to lol

<3 <3

[itsscromp]

What kind of video games would the 141 + könig would play.

Have another headcanon on me 😊

Captain John price

Being the dad of the group, I wouldn’t think he’d play too many video games.

He’ll whip out candy crush on his phone every now and then.

Don’t ask him what his level is he’ll just say “it’s so high”

But if he did, he would want to play games that involved the whole group.

Like Mario kart, super smash bros, rocket league or just dance.

You laugh every time when he tries to do his best at that.

John soap mactavish

Johnny would be the type of person who just doesn’t care what he plays as long as he has fun doing so.

He would play games that aren’t so big on story, just more about the game play.

Big on racing games, your usual need for speed or burnout.

But I would feel he’d like alternative history if he was feeling in a story mood.

Throw in Wolfenstien or atomic heart and your good to go.

Kyle gaz Garrick

Gaz on the other hand I’d think would be into games that are based of existing properties.

I’d think he’d spent most of his teenage years playing dungeons and dragons or Warhammer, so naturally he’d be into games like space marine or necromunda hired gun.

As he is a fan of the franchises he’d pay attention to see if they actually do the lore justice in the games.

Don’t ever mention dungeons and dragons dark alliance as he hated it with a pure passion and he’ll rant all day about it.

Simon ghost Riley

Now Simon would be a single player game only type of person.

He would play super story focused games like the last of us or god of war.

I would take him as a horror game fan so he’d feel right at home with dead space or resident evil.

Like gaz, don’t get him riled up on the Callisto protocol, he’d complain to kingdom come how uninspired it was and it practically was dead space.

And he’ll never admit it but he cried during the last of us’s opening.

König

König being the gentle giant he is would play more relaxing games.

Animal crossing 100%

If you were friends with him, he would give you gifts to your village.

He’d be big on platformers as well, indie or triple A.

Sometimes would decipher wether Mario or sonic is better.

During his time when things get overwhelming, he’ll turn on his comfort game and let the worry’s wash away.

[valenteal]

Ok so I just finished watching Angels of Death and omg I need to talk about it!

So usually when I get really into a story it’s full of awesome world building and it at least tries to explain everything and I usually don’t like it when a story completely disregards logic but this is different. It’s a story that focuses on character building and development and it twists reality to suit its desired narrative, which is definitely better than the stories that twist characters to do the same. And even though logic is cast aside in terms of the events and the setting it’s not cast aside in the characters.

Usually when a show or movie or book focuses on serial killers as the main character or the protagonist it doesn’t make the serial killer realistic. They are often romanticized. Angels of Death does a great job not romanticizing serial killers but instead humanizes them spectacularly. Besides that it’s actually pretty realistic in terms of psychology.

I’m not a psychologist by any means, but I have done ample research on my own into psychology so I can write and analyze characters properly. I would guess that Zack is a sociopath and Rachel is a psychopath. The difference between the two is that psychopathy is chemical, it’s an actual inability to feel empathy, and psychopaths are usually better at hiding it and fitting in and are less prone to lashing out in anger than a sociopath. Sociopaths can feel a connection with another person where a psychopath can’t though empathy is still impaired, I’m pretty sure that sociopathy is caused more by environment than psychopathy is, though both are still fairly mysterious. Also the whole evil mastermind thing isn’t used as the standard, which is accurate because sociopaths and psychopaths have the same range of intelligence as anyone else and most are not geniuses. Geniuses are not more likely to have antisocial personality disorder. Rachel seems to have above average intelligence, so do Danny and Reverend Gray but Eddie and Cathy seem average to me. I’m not sure about Zack, he’s definitely uneducated but that doesn’t mean he’s unintelligent, he’s got good instincts and he’s a fast learner so if he had a proper education who’s to say? Anyway Zack definitely reads as a sadistic sociopath to me, and Rachel is a psychopath with a whole host of other issues, probably something dissociative.

Angels of Death is written fantastically and as a writer I have to admire it for its wonderful characters that are all so human. It’s so interesting to see a story like this, entirely character driven but the characters are all so complex, they all, except maybe Zack, have very warped views of reality and get to design their domain to reflect that. The world is just the characters minds, the setting reflects their mental state, and logic operates according to their twisted perception. It’s so interesting to see!

Beyond the fascinating characters and unique story telling I’d like to add my two cents to the debate about the open ending. Personally I like open endings, and it fits a story like this that doesn’t necessarily adhere to logic and is fairly open to interpretation. But I also have to point out that the glass of the window was smashed inwards, from the outside and the cops showed up en masse before any other emergency services got there. Plenty of evidence to suggest that Zack really did escape and find Rachel. The knife had no blood on it. The blood on the window sill definitely makes it seem like someone got injured there and they didn’t just jump out the window, but it doesn’t seem like enough for someone to have died right there. However the actual scene where Zack shows up to take Rachel away definitely seems like a hallucination, Zack is in his familiar clothes and has his scythe back, not to mention the floating in mid air thing. With Rachel’s mental state and warped perception of reality I would say it’s entirely plausible that Zack did show up it just didn’t go down quite how she (and the audience) saw it. My theory, the details of which are invented by my own mind and not necessarily supported by evidence, is that Zack showed up with his knife intending to kill Rachel but a cop shot at him not realizing he was holding Rachel as he hadn’t entered the room yet and they couldn’t imagine she would go to him. They both get shot, Zack dropped the knife and they both fall backwards out window. It’s possible they survive but idk. Anyway that’s my take.

[screamingendlesslyintospace]

thinking about Orca again.

Why did she choose to challenge Queen Coral when she was only 7 years old? we don’t really know what type of relationship Orca and Coral had, or why Orca decided to challenge Coral when she did. at first i thought it was because the queen was going to try to use her animus powers in the same way she is using Anemone, but Orca hid her powers from the queen. was it because she hated queen coral and wanted to be queen so badly that she couldn’t wait longer?

clearly she thought she would win the challenge, her statue in the nursery being already enchanted to kill future heirs BEFORE she entered the fight proves that. But Queen Coral ended up winning, and as she was dying Orca said “I did this all wrong. you’re going to rule forever, aren’t you, mother? you should thank me…” … but if Orca was an animus dragon could she not have won the fight easily using her powers? she probably wanted to keep her powers hidden, but because nobody knew she had magic, could she not have quietly used magic to assist her and make it look like it was a natural kill instead of a magical one? she would have saved her own life and secured her win by doing that. did she care about it being a fair win enough to not use her powers? or was there another reason?

if she was concerned about her soul turning evil from using her powers to kill Queen Coral, i’d understand not wanting to use them during the fight. HOWEVER … isn’t the concept of her statue pretty dark? it implies that—if Orca had won—she would have just been completely fine with every single one of her female eggs being smashed. now that could be just how Orca was; just kind of ruthless and power hungry (ig ?), and willing to see her eggs die if it meant she wouldn’t have competition for the throne. but, could it also have been partly because of her soul beginning to turn due to the use of her Animus powers? we don’t really know how much she used them or what she was using them for. though the statue would lead us to believe she used them—at least sometimes—for selfish reasons, which could mean that her soul had begun to turn slightly.

if Orca had enchanted the statue as she was dying as a way to take revenge on queen coral, her whole situation would have made more sense. but based on the fact that she chose to challenge the queen so young, AND she wanted to ensure all her own dragonets would be murdered just so she could remain queen, it kind of seems like her soul was already being corrupted by her powers. but if she had been corrupted, did nobody notice any changes in her behavior or thinking? even if they were subtle changes.

Because even when queens plan ahead and think about how to keep themselves from being challenged for the throne, they usually have at least one dragonet who’s a direct heir, even if they take measures to keep control over them. because longevity of your own kingdom and species is obviously (or, at least most likely) important to every type of queen, even if it’s for selfish reasons, because every clear-thinking dragon knows they won’t live forever. unless it was Orcas plan to win the queen challenge and then secretly enchant herself to live forever like Jerboa I?? would she have kept her animus powers a secret as queen??

i don’t know, i’m just very curious about the Orca era and Orca as a character. many brainworms.