#evidence: like SO much group therapy

[tortoise-teapot]

solas haters are so annoying

like i promise you there are a million other perfectly good reasons to not like him besides "he's full of himself." which is the impression some people get after his dialogue in haven, and usually what they bring up in their crit posts. like... that's not even really accurate. hes a bit self centered sure (he's the type of guy who leaves only 1/8th cup milk in the bottle and doesn't write it on the shopping list) but at that time he's just infodumping.

if you're gonna hate him at least pick a reason that is true 🙄 for example unless you stop him he full on murders a scared guy who made a mistake out of ignorance.

"but robin he has killed a whole bunch of people! notoriously so!" i hear you i hear your point. the difference is that this time it was personal and in cold blood.

[catboybiologist]

So y'all may have noticed I've been posting a lot about progesterone lately. I'm at the point on HRT (just passed the 9 month mark [with the asterisk that my levels didn't get good until 7 months or so]) where I'm actively considering it. I'm waiting a bit more for a couple reasons, but its still on my mind a lot.

And it bothers me how much the "no compelling evidence for progesterone" line is floated around. And this is true, for the exact case of breast size in transgender women. And yeah, maybe this study has been done.

But I have two things that I think should be said about this:

1, there will never be a clinical study that studies the exact niche case of person that you are. That's why thinking about when results can be translated from a different group that has been studied, to your group. In my opinion, most information about cis female hormones can be translated to trans women. There's far less of a physiological difference than people think, and most of those differences are dictated by hormones anyways.

2, progesterone has an enormous number of effects beyond breast development, in both cis and trans women.

Why do I bring these up?

Take a look at this review paper (if you can meaningfully read it):

This is a review paper that I somehow only just stumbled upon that summarizes a lot of my thoughts about progesterone that I developed from other sources.

It primarily uses data from cis women, but also supplements with data from trans women when applicable, about the effects of progesterone. And, as can be seen just by the sheer number of topics addressed, it finds a diverse set of functions that it regulates and improves. At that point, any breast growth that may or may not occur is a happy side effect.

Progesterone is part of normal female physiology, just like estrogen. So why the hell is it not standard practice with HRT the same way that estradiol is? It just needs to be applied later. That's pretty much it.

[baguettesandbows]

2

tw! sa undertones

P3

If you thought you felt crazy thinking that Jason was alive before, you felt ten times crazier in Arkham.

The place wasn’t built for crazy people, it was built to keep them inside. Away from the high end galas and family members who were ashamed of them. A place where Batman could put villains that were too much trouble for the GCPD.

You fit into those catagories perfectly.

Dick wasn’t lying, Bruce had gotten you the suite. The suite in Arkham. You had assumed your room might be better than the ones the Joker would’ve had. Or any other villain that’s escaped from here.

Escaped. Maybe that’s why Bruce put you in a suite.

Through unpacking, they didn’t slow you to bring in any of Jason’s items. His sweatshirt, his favorite books, even the paper band from your first concert together.

Because it would trigger your attacks.

You had punched the guards nose as they carried you out from holding.

What you had to give to Arkham, was they kept to a schedule. The point of it seemed to make everyone more crazy. Therapy was interrogating, Lunch was slop, and visiting hours… was just Dick.

You’re least favorite time of Arkham was Rec. They’d put you and the other high class young women in the same room, and expected no fights to happen. Sometimes, they’d mix the genders so there would be fights.

You learned quickly to keep to yourself and not tell anyone anything. You could practically hear Jason saying “Snitches don’t get stitches. They go missin’ in Gotham.”

Jason. Jason Todd. The boy who called you birdie. Your first everything. His red tank tops and his boyish smirk, his arm covered in friendship bracelets you’d make while he was on patrol-

“Reader?”

You look up from the table and avoid looking at the couple practically shagging in the corner, to focus on the man with a clipboard, looking around the room.

You were new, but he seemed newer.

“Here.” You mumble, getting up and walking past a small group of men who eye you in your sweatsuit.

You meet the man at the gate locking in the rec room, and meet his gaze blankly.

“You’re Reader? Right, I’m Jefferson, the new assistant to Doctor Jane.” The man says softly, yet clearly trying to be.. intimidating? “I’m taking over her clients while she’s on break after the.. incident.”

The incident. A woman had snuck a metal pipe into her meeting last week.

“Right.”

Jefferson clears his throat and smiles warmly at you, an expression not hardened yet by Arkham. “Follow me, please.”

Jefferson met with you two times a week. The first weeks were rough, since you had expected Jefferson to be the same as everyone else. To instantly deny your truth.

But he listened. He listened to your ideas, and your proof. You think he would’ve even looked at your evidence, if you were allowed to bring it in.

Sometimes, although it wasn’t allowed, he’d bring you a coffee. One from a diner on his way to Arkham.

You had questioned another woman in your cell block about if Jefferson bought everyone coffee on tuesdays. That question earned you a right hook, due to being a favorite.

You were laying in your room, staring at the top of your bed frame, fidgeting with your hands. Every night, you’d memorize Jason’s face. Especially when you weren’t allowed to have pictures of him here, you couldn’t forget his features.

You didn’t want to forget his face, in case he walked right by you.

With as much money Arkham gets from supporters and investors, the walls were paper thin. You could hear the rustling of your next door neighbor, as her secret escapades with one of the guards weren’t secret to you.

Below, you could hear pounding, most likely one of the women who was given a punching bad to ease her anger.

Your body trembled from the cold, but it wasn’t just from Arkhams shivering tempature. You had gotten used to Jason sneaking in, warming you up after his patrol. His ego boosting from his smirk as he told you about the goons he had taken down during the night.

He was so proud to be Robin. More people should’ve been proud of him for it.

You don’t realize your sobbing until the thumping next door stops, and your use of their white noise draws you out of it.

What, did your crying turn them off?

You hear rustling, before the guard walks out of her cell and up to yours. Unlocking the door, she peers in at you.

“You miss your dose of somethin’?”

You furrow your eyebrows. You knew most patients here took doses of things, but naively you assumed it was for their mental illnesses.

“For what?”

“For sleepin’. Almost everyone here gets some.” The guard says. “Leaves us less to deal with at night.”

At least she was honest.

You think for a moment, or not at all, before replying.

“Yeah. I take those.”

The pills make time in Arkham fly by.

You realize it’s why most of the patients take then. If you didn’t look at Jeffersons calendar every meeting, you’d understand why most of these people go crazy.

Jason would knee you in the vagina if he knew what you were doing. But he’s understand. Atleast, that’s what you tell yourself.

You’ve noticed one thing about Arkham, the prosedures.

Shock therapy. You wouldnt beleive it still existed, if you hadn’t seen the marks on the women at your lunch table. You had realized they hadn’t done it to you, because Dick or Bruce must be too involved with your care. Plus, Bruce could figure out anything that happened to you, as long as he was interested.

You hope that being his sons girlfriend will be enough for him to care about you for as long as your in here.

Jefferson’s office smelled good. Different than usual. You realized why when you saw a candle on his desk.

“Reader, come on in.” Jefferson says from his desk, scrubbing on his papers. “Sorry for the mess, some of the patients here have no knowledge for manners.”

He looked at you and gestures for you to sit in the chair across his desk like usual. You did as he said, and he seemed to always relax at your obedience.

“I heard we had a setback earlier this week.” Jefferson starts. “Randy told me she heard you talking to..” He checks his papers. “Jason, in your room.”

“I wasn’t talking to him.” You mutter. “I was talking about him. To myself.”

Jefferson clears his throat and nods. “Right. Well, we do know that a main reason your here is for your.. obsession to this case.”

He slides over a cup of coffee for you, which you take, tkaing a sip.

“Reader, you know that I am supportive of your ideas about this Jason. Regardless, any way out of Arkham is proving the fact that you aren’t, focused on what happened to him.”

Jefferson gets up from his desk and walks around it, sitting on the edge and looking down at you as you sip your coffee.

His lips twitch. “Good, right?” He says quietly, watching you. You nod, and he starts. “I don’t think you should be here. You aren’t like these other women. They have tarnished themselves. But you..” He draws off, reaching out to gently take the coffee from you.

Your lips were practically still on the container as he pulls it back to himself, making you look up at him in confusion. He brings the cup to his lips and takes a sip. He makes a noise as the coffee hits his tongue before looking at you. “I’m the only one that listens to you in here.” He says quietly. “I think you know that. And if what your saying is true, I want you to be able to get out of here and prove everyone wrong.”

He leans in, meeting your gaze. “I can sign you off and have you out of here after evaluation, but after all those treats i’ve given you, I think I deserve some of my own. Don’t you?”

[tinydefector]

Ok ok i thought about this and for me it's sounds funny.

Sooo on the comic where everyone just found out that Rung is god you know where Rodimus, Rachet, Whirl and Tyrest and others having existing crisis and the part where Whirl said "God was my therapist" and then I thought about it, how funny it would be if cybertronian or human MC/reader said something like "I was fuck by said God" like if said cybertronian/human was in relationship with Rung and everyone reaction (plus Tyrest too since I think he's a god fanatic) 😂😂😂😂

XD omg so I had a bit of a joke piece about fucking God over in this fic. But it gets even better that thought of Tyrest being a God fanatic and hating Organics. The horror when he finds out Primus is with a human, watch this mech just break down.

Everyone's optics and eyes are on Rung, and the mech stands there wishing attention wasn't on him. Rodimus paces back and forth, Ratchet just stares off into a wall wish above all he wasn't here right now. Whirl, for the first time, is so quiet that it makes everyone so uncomfortable. And then there was the human just looking up at Rung in shock, dismay? They really didn't know how they felt in that moment.

Rodimus finally speaks. "OK, ok, but how the Frag!, Your Primus! All this time, you have just been what? Hiding on cybertron, having a vacation!" He asked. He was bitter about this, as much as he wanted to blame Rung for everything, cybertron falling apart, his home, and the matrix in truth it wasn't his fault. After all wasn't he doing the exact same thing, running away because he didn't want to be a prime, he wasn't suited for it, he didn't want to live in Optimus' shadow and have that shame over him. He'd take being co captain with Megatron over having to be in Optimus' shadow any cycle.

Ratchet, on the other hand, just wants a strong drink. He had never been a believe in gods, yet here he was finding out the the mech who had been the Lost Light's therapist, had been a neutral throughout the war, had a space ship collection older then some mechs was Primus. It was just his luck. "Does anyone else know?" He asked, trying to be the level-headed one of the group.

Rung removes his glasses, and the stress and exhaustion are very visible on his faceplate. "Drift, I believe, he's, he's always suspected something," Rung explains. He wasn't sure, but he's rather sure that Drift knows what he is.

Whirl finally laughs. "This is Fragged. How in the Pit did I end up this fragging, unlucky that my slagging therapist is Fragging Primus!" They shout, they don't know if they are angry, hurt or just overwhelmed, so much had been fried in their circuitry after the Emputra but this, this felt like a sick joke. All the things he had told Rung now feel like they were confessions.

Tyrest is baffled. He doesn't know whether to fall to his knees or call blasphemy, but the evidence is right there in front of his optics.

Rung is sheepish as he looks to the human. He's hoping they don't hate him. "I know this is alot for you all to take in, I'm sorry you all had to find out this way, I'm sincerely sorry for everything that has happened" He calls out to the group. He goes to continue only to be cut off.

"Fuck my life, Swerve is never going to let me live this down" the human stammers out. Everyone's optics are on them, a flush tints Rungs plating. "Please we don't need to bring that-" He's cut off again.

"The fact that I've unknowingly been getting Railed by Primus!" They exclaim only for Rung to hide behind one of his servos as multiple mech's Jaws drop at those words.

"HAH, and i thought I was Fragged!" Whirl screeched, finding humour in the situation. The other mechs look just as shocked and disgusted. "No, I refuse. That's blasphemy. Please tell me you haven't been interfacing with an organic!" Tyrest almost pleaded, hoping by the all spark that it wasn't true.

Rodimus pinches his brow ridge. He could feel his processor hurting from all this information. "Slagging Pit," he grumbles. " I Owe Sunstreaker so much Shainx now," he huffs. "OK, ok. Rung's Primus, and he's fragging a human." He throws his servos up in the air, being overly dramatic.

Ratchet just glares at the two. "They both of you are to report to medical for an examination after this, You" he points right at Rung. " I have some rather choice words for you," he states before stalking off, leaving.

The human looks at the floor, and the true panic is taking over. "Oh fuck, I've been fucking an Alien God who's also my therapist" they mutter to themself, tears starting to well up in their eyes and Rung kneels down cupping their face and wiping the tears away. "I didn't mean to upset you," he says softly. Optics focused on them. " I don't want this to change anything between us. You mean a great deal to me, and I don't want to lose you," he murmurs to them, pressing a soft kiss to their forehead.

The sound of the others arguing and fighting drowns out as Rung focuses on his little lover. "I'm not angry, Rung, Primus, or whatever name you want to go by, but... but I'm a human, a random fucking human so why me. Why me? " they nearly sob as he scoops them up, pulling them against his frame.

"My dear, I'm the the holy being everyone believes I am, I'm just a very old mech, who did what he could to stop something bad from happening, alot fo the tales told are very twisted stories. I'm just a mech, I'm not some holy being. And as for why you. You were the first person to remember my name, you took an interest in my hobbies, I would have happily faded into dust unknown but you choose me" he coos softly. Digits tracing their cheeks as he looks at them in pure love.

"But an Organic!" Tyrest hisses out as he watches how sweet and tender Rung is with the human. Is Rodimus who speaks up next. "Ah ah, remember each time to talk badly about organic races you lose Shanix which goes right into my account!~" Rodimus sings out, trying to make light of the situation for his own mental stability.

"You two are fragged and Slag, and I thought I had issues!" Whirl huffs before pointing at Rung. "Not a word about our therapy session to anyone, God or not, I will end you." Whirl nearly snarls before transforming and taking off.

"But you are Primus! You could have your choice of any cybertronian, pillars in your name cities, why have you hidden for so long!" Tyrest utters, he wants to be angry, but at the same time, this was Primus. How could he.

Rung meets his optics. "Because that's not the type of mech I am, I did what I had to to stop Unicron, I got sick of people trying to put me on a pedestal, I wanted to live, live my life, to enjoy hobbies, travel, I gave up my old frame for the ability to live" he states. He wouldn't change his choices even if he had the ability to. He was content.

________

MC: "Swerve get me a strong drink!"

Swerve: "heya what got you so rilled up, partner problems? Give me all the juicy details."

MC: staring him dead in the optics. "Swerve, Rung is Primus"

Swerve: "Well, I wouldn't call him that, I mean, he must be a good frag but doubt that"

MC: "No Swerve, Rung is Primus, I've been fucking your God, why me, how did I get to this point"

Swerve: "you know what let me get you a double"

--

Rung: "this is a mess, I need to get myself a Therapist"

Swerve: "well doc tell me all your woos, I'm the closest your gonna get for therapy"

Rung: " ships having a meltdown over my past and the fact I'm with a human"

Swerve: " eh, heard worse, your squishy things your Primus"

Rung: " yes, well that's also part of the issue"

---

Whirl: "soo.... Rung huh?"

Mc: "Please, I don't want to talk about it"

Whirl: "What part, the part where you're fragging the ships Therapist or the part where your Fragging Primus."

MC: "Oh my fucking God Whirl!"

Whirl: "Ah, ah, your fucking my God not the other way round!"

---

MC: "fuck you Tyrest, you owe Rodimus more money now, from being a Xenophobe."

Tyrest: "Like, I would ever let you within five meters of my frame you disgusting little creatin. Your insults mean nothing to me. Filthy little flesh thing"

MC: " just remember it's your Beloved Primus who's fragging me!, yea!, your beloved God prefers fragging me!"

Tyrest: *the most horrified noise ever* " You take the Blastphamy Back!"

__________

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[clrasecretdiary]

omggg ive really wanted to see a fluff fic where the BAU go ice skating as like a team building thing or whatever and Spencer keeps slipping and falling and holding on to the reader its so cute HISJHFSJKD

I'd pick you up and we'd go back in time | Spencer Reid x fem! Reader

just fluff!!

warnings: none

word count: 716 words

a/n: Heey! Just finished this one, it's my first ask (tysm btw!! <3). Hope you guys like it and hope i did justice to what you were imagining for the fic!!

It's the end of December and, surprisingly, you and the team are officially off duty until the next year. You guys decided to go out and have some fun, settling on the idea to go ice skating and then to dinner.

 Much to the dismay of Spencer, which besides being an academic genius, did not have any talent when it came to sports. If it wasn't for the scientific evidence, he would pretty much argue that he was born without the ability to balance himself, so any activity that demanded that skill was his worst nightmare.

"C'mon, spence, I can convince the team to go to your favorite restaurant after!" You said to Spencer over the phone, after he said that he was not going. 

"I don't know… you know I hate sports, I'll probably just fall and annoy you guys" 

"I'll teach you, and you know you won't annoy us. Also, we really miss you." You say, in reality wanting to say "I miss you" but scared that Spencer might pick up on your hidden feelings. 

He reluctantly agreed to go, but he was super nervous about it, scared that he would embarrass himself in front of his friends, or more importantly, in front of you. 

—

It now was the day you and the team had agreed on going ice skating, you put on your cute winter clothes and head out to the rink.

" Hey everyone, missed you guys so much!!" You say, getting close to the group that was standing at the entrance and greeting them all 

"Hi honey, you look stunning" Garcia says pulling you to a hug

"Thank you pen" You say, smiling to her. "Hey spence, i did not actually believe you we're going to come here!" 

"Yeah, me either. But I decided to do some exposure therapy, actually did you guys know that it was idealized by Ivan Pavlov in the late 1800s as part of is conditioning experiments?" - Spencer says, doing his usual rambling that you found extremely adorable. 

"Alright pretty boy, enough lectures, let's get in the rink" Derek says, making the team laugh. 

Upon entering the place, you happily notice that besides you and the team, it was pretty much empty, giving you guys a chance to have fun without worrying about others. You guys all get your skates, and put them on. As soon as you guys step on the ice, you felt a hand holding your arm, you look over and see spencer that looked as if his life was in danger. 

"It's fine spence, try standing up right and walking a bit, I'll be here to hold you so you don't fall down" 

"Alright then, if I die, please make sure my books don't get mold" He says, trying to take a few steps, surprisingly he did not immediately fall down, which gave him a bit of confidence to try and actually skate, also wanting to look tough for you. "I think you don't need to hold me anymore, y/n" 

"You sure Spence? Alright then" You let go of his arm and take a few steps back, still keeping a close eye on him. 

Spencer was able to skate for a bit, but somehow he managed to stumble on his own feet, luckily since you were still close he tried to hold onto your arm, not so luckily, since you did not expect that, you both feel onto the ice. The whole team looked over to you guys, as you stood up and helped spencer to also get up. 

You both we're blushing as the team laughed at you guys

 "hey Reid, at least you fell onto a pretty girl, could be worse" Morgan said, tapping spencer's shoulder and laughing. 

That made you guys blush even harder. 

"Hey spence, you ok? " You say, feeling a bit guilty for making him do this 

"It's fine y/n, falling is part of the fun I guess" He said, not sure he meant it but happy that he got to spend time with you outside the office. 

You spent the next hour teaching Spencer, and honestly you could not be happier, he looked adorable. It was one of the best evenings you had in a long time, and it just made your silly workplace crush worse. You also paid for his favorite desert at the restaurant to thank him for giving it a chance.

[pyrrhiccomedy]

a collection of thoughts about Veilguard

it's pretty good! it's a fun, straightforward adventure story where you play the good guys, the bad guys are bad guys, and there's one morally ambiguous character but don't get scared, you have the whole game to decide what to do with him. the combat is fun, the cast is likable, and the world is pretty. if you like fantasy rpgs, you will probably like this one!

I said the cast is likeable. I didn't say they were interesting. everyone kinda comes off like they've been to therapy for at least six months, and have put in some effort to "do the work." Your party's character flaws are things like "people pleaser" or "rude (but still well-intentioned)" or "justifiably cynical." These are all more or less functional and mature adults who want to get along and experience very few obstacles to doing so.

The obstacles they do experience to getting along are pretty flimsy, and are sometimes resolved in under a minute.

Le wokisme is a problem with the factions, which is a problem with the game, because the game revolves around the factions. None of the factions are allowed to be - again - morally ambiguous. There's a faction of treasure hunters, but don't worry, they have experts to make sure they don't sell anything important to anyone's culture. There's a faction of assassins which in a previous game have been shown to be harsh mercenaries who traffic in slavery in order to acquire children to raise into professional killers, but don't worry, they've mellowed out a lot since then, and now they ~don't kill innocent people~ and all of the members are excited to be there. There's a faction of death-worshipping necromancers, but don't worry: they're pretty much treated as a joke faction, and they don't do anything darker than raising some friendly skeletons to do custodial work.

A lot of the game takes place in the Tevinter Imperium, which we know from previous games to be a racist imperial power built upon the labor of a mostly-elven slave force. I say we know that 'from previous games' because it really doesn't come up in this game. The Tevinter faction is a group of slave abolitionists, but you don't actually help them free any slaves. In fact, you never even meet any slaves. In fact, you never even see any slaves. In Minrathous, the capitol city of the slave empire.

We also never see any anti-elf racism, in Minrathous or anywhere else, or meet any elves anywhere who have much of anything negative to say about the current world state. I think it would have been interesting to engage with why some elves might actually support the Morally Ambiguous Guy Who Is Looking To Tear Down The Current World Order In Order To Restore The Elves To Their Bygone Glory, but then your protagonists might have been placed into an ethically dubious situation at some point, by opposing a guy, who is, among some more alarming intentions - let me be so clear - trying to free the elven slaves. And god forbid we make the player uncomfortable!

There are no titties in this game. You do fuck your love interest on the eve of the final battle, as is traditional, but there will be nary a titty in sight. That, like ethical conundrums or moral ambiguity, is evidently too grown-up for the target Veilguard audience.

Whoever it was on the writing team who was interested in the Qunari has either left the team, or is no longer interested in the Qunari. They are a non-presence, and the Big Grey Guys With Horns who you fight are just violent assholes who don't follow the Qun. They've also been redesigned again. They basically just look like tieflings, with even more awkward foreheads. RIP to a genuinely original fantasy race. We'll always have Sten and the DA2 Arishok.

Fans of previous games will, however, be pleased at how generous the writers have been with answering outstanding questions! You will learn what the titans were, what happened to them, what the Blight is, what caused the Blight, what the Golden/Black City is, why breaching it unleashed the Blight, who the Tevinter old gods were, what the deal was with the elven gods, and (not that anyone was in doubt of this after Inquisition anyway) that the Maker is fake for sure for sure.

Every religion in Thedas is proved to be fake by the end of the game, though, so it feels a bit less like "kids raised evangelical stick it to Big Church" this time.

Morrigan is back! Isabela is back! Dorian is back! Welcome visitations.

People are being shitty about there being an explicitly non-binary character. Fuck those people obviously, but I do wish they'd found something better to call this character than "non-binary," such a modern term that it slingshot me out of my fantasy world full of dragons and magic into a corporate diversity and inclusion training module.

Being a mage doesn't matter anymore. Sorry if you were hoping it might, but honestly that's on you. If they chickened out of doing anything with the mage conflict set up in DA:O and DA2 in Inquisition, I don't know why you expected they'd find a renewed interest in engaging with it now.

You can't be a blood mage. You can't actually do anything evil. Your PC is a Hero. I don't have a problem with this, exactly, but it contributes to the feeling of the series having moved to the kiddy end of the pool over the years.

Overall, I think this is almost surely going to be the last Dragon Age game, and I think that's almost definitely a good thing. It's a fun send-off that takes you on a whistle-stop tour of nearly all the places left in Thedas you haven't seen yet, ties up nearly all of the loose ends, and lets you hit an ogre with a warhammer so hard that he goes flying like he's full of packing peanuts.

Time enjoyably, but not meaningfully, spent.

[sarahivi]

This is a loong interview, i'll try to translate some parts

Min 0:00 - 8:12

Pati – In This occasion I have the huge privilege that in front of me is one of the most important actors in the last decades in this country and I’m talking about Tenoch Huerta. Welcome to the YouTube channel, thank you so much for being here, however only few people know that your first job after you finished the career of journalism in UNAM was of cameramen here in Azteca, how did you get here?

Tenoch – That’s right, some friends, well I was learning in a cable channel and some friend came here, the calls were opened for “La academia” and I came here as cameramen, and it has been one of the funniest experiences in my life

P – Really, why?

T – I loved it, I loved the camera, in fact I have thought if I wasn’t an actor I would have end up as camera director or film photographer

P – But you decided to be in front of the screen, it was to please your dad or because truly the interest of being an actor was born in you

T – Taking the classes was a little so my dad stopped bothering me ,truly, cause it wasn’t to “please him”, my parents are more like do whatever you want as long it makes you happy, so it was so he stopped bothering me, but I liked it and I remember that once I asked him, why you insisted so much? and he told me, because I saw something in you, and I was satisfied with his answer, above all the first part “I saw you” my dad was looking at me and it was like, lovely my dad has always been looking at me and with that I was saved of a lot of traumas and a lot of money from therapy

P – but I don’t think you save money because I heard that you are in therapy

T – Yes, usually I go to therapy, it is a personal discipline, but now it has had to be a little stronger

P – Why?

T – because dragging a lot of topics, evidently everything that happened to me in the last couple of years, are situations of a lot of stress, because not only hits you, it hits your entire family environment.

P – We are talking about Miss Rios case?

T – Yes, because with this accusations my life, my career and my work and family environment were affected, and the hardest part is when you face a lie , when there is a lie, when there are inaccurate data, and the worst part of a lie is not the lie itself, A totally fictitious construction, but when you take elements that are real and misrepresent them and move them so they can fit with things , that's the worst part because even the person that is receiving the attack, in this case myself, it puts you in a state of alert, confusion, pain, you question yourself a lot of things, even there is a self-punishment, a lot of thing mixing and for that you need a therapy

P – What kind of relationship you had with her?

T – we were colleagues in Poder Prieto, I admired her, I hadn't had the pleasure of meeting her, then we attended an event, some collectives were invited and we met there, that’s when we started to get close and at first she seems like a fun girl, very strong, very attractive too and that’s it, the relationship was always like a relationship that was not exclusive

P – An open relationship

T – An open relationship yes

P – So you had relations but you both could have other relationships

T – Yes, even that, I mean in all groups there are other groups of closer friends, in this group of closer friends she told us that she was seeing other people, which it was ok, I too saw other people, there was no problem, simply maybe it was something that we should have talked more precisely, put labels

P – Exactly

T – It could be that, but anyway, not putting labels doesn’t give you the right to destroy a person's life, so that was the kind of relationship, it lasted a few months until there started to be some attitudes, more aggressive.

P – From her?

T – Yes, there was a moment where I got closer to a colleague that is my age, we saw the same cartoons when we were kids and it was fun to talk, and she didn’t like it even if this colleague was only a friend, also it was a friend of hers, and this kind of frictions started to show a weird behavior from her, until she started to attack me within the collective

P – So first was an attack, let’s say in relation with the person within the collective, without posting it on twitter nor social media

T – Nothing, and that’s when I talked to her, we met in a park and in this conversation that we had, she suddenly told me, we were talking and suddenly told me “ ok enough, what are you willing to give to calm all of this?” and I told her, a public apology if you want , I can talk with the people, I don’t know you tell me , I thought that we didn’t have a problem, simply we should have talked more, I don’t know but whatever you say and that was it, some time later when everything exploded and I’m in a huge stressful moment, I had a reunion with some friends, I met a person, that maybe by fate he was sitting next to me and he is a therapist specialized in supporting families that are victims of extortion and kidnaps , so in the conversation the topic arose , I told him and he said, in my experience that was an extortion, the “what are you willing to give?” and I told him “ she didn’t ask for money” and he told me, no, the professionals are very subtle , anyway he didn’t know my case in detail, so I simply took it from there, then time passed, we found some information, the lawyers started investigating, we realized that indeed there were shady things of which I cannot point directly to someone because it will be doing the same that was done to me, I only can say that there are proof that are verifiable, file numbers, and that’s the job of the authority to get to the bottom of those affairs that have years, there are files that have more than 10 years

Update 8:12 - 20:32mins

P – What were the legal actions that you took

T – Legal actions, first I got a solid lawyers team in different stages, a 1st stage was a team of lawyers then a 2nd stage another team of lawyers even in USA, 1st the lawyers, they gatherd information , but also put some legal mechanisms of which I can not talk about but are legal mechanisms that are activated that are carried out, that are like a kind of, I don't know what to really call it, it's like a kind of antecedent, like putting a warning, like that there is a record that this is happening those actions have been carried out, but more important we have been monitoring this last year, 2 years, every week if there is something against me if there is a lawsuit, a complaint, something

P – She has not raise a complaint

T – No one, there is nothing against me , I don’t even have traffic violations.

P – Tenoch, what happen with you when suddenly in social media they are lynching you?

T – Is painful, is scary because once someone filter information about my daughters, with pictures and more , and in anonymity is hard to track , when the lynching started, from real people , bots, troll and more they start to attack my family , we received some direct threats that threatened the integrity of members of my family, and things of that kind so you put yourself in a state of permanent alert, you can’t let your guard down , and as i told my team, is like carrying a dragon breathing in your ear all the time , that you don’t know what might happen because with the topic of anonymous complaints you can take advantage of that, I understand where is coming from, I understand from the desperation of a lot of people that cannot achieve justice for many reasons sometimes they are only left with this, then there is a whole system that favors the men that provokes that people have to resort to this methods that at the beginning might sound good that I even say that, yes they are there for something but when you take advantage of them, you start to use it for personal purposes, politics, economic, electoral or to have better jobs, is when it start to be a problem, because is public, there is no need to prove anything there is non an authority to tell you , mr please you came to make an accusation, if you don’t show proof doesn’t proceed and if does not proceed you are affecting this person , those mechanisms doesn’t exist in social media, simply people believes it or not and that’s it, it’s over, there is no contrast, there is not a method to see if this works, to see if this is real or not and that’s the problem, I think the problem, not talking about my case, talking in general that i also want to clarify that I’d like that my case is not used to demerit the feminist movement,

P – Those are different things

T – Absolutely, and I’m glad that you are saying it, because it comes from a woman and it’s ok, and are different things, the feminist fight and the media lynching are 2 different things that’s why I don’t want that my case is taken to demerit the other, also I understand the reason why there are anonymous complaints and public complaints , but there are not regulated

P – they are not valid

T – they are not valid, and they are being used for other purposes , I think there should be another protocol , I don’t know, for example in usa to make a complaint first I have to have a formal complaint or lawsuit before the authorities, and then with my file in hand I can make a public complaint, not here in Mexico, here in Mexico you made the public complaint and if someone believes in you good and if they don’t too. I think those are the topics that are complicated and for me it was not only the personal impact, you get used to it and you take it and you say, well I’ll take care of it, the problem is when you see that your family

P – How old are your daugthers?

T – 4 and 11

P – They are so young

T – Yes, the older one had 9 and the younger one had 2, fortunately the younger one doesn’t know yet a lot of things, but the older one yes and that is so painful, also my parents,

P – They have suffered

T - *nods* my sisters

P – You being a man, this situation affected how you approach other women?

T – Yes, it affects, undoubtedly, but I’m not of the idea that things happen for a reason, I believe that things happen and you give them a reason and you take the lesson and learn from it, so the way it affected is that I tried to approach in a better way, be more careful and more selective, not everyone deserves our heart , not everyone deserves our vulnerability, not everyone deserved that we are open with them, not everyone deserves it, you have to take the time to know the person and now I’m more careful, more selective, but now I’m more clear, I have always been clear with people, I have always been like “I’m here to work, we are going to be here 2 months it might something happen between us, maybe not” you know, I have always been clear, now I’m more clear , now I’m more straight and basically I stopped interacting with many people, I’m scared that’s a reality

P – Is natural

T – there’s this alert of get to know the people little by little, I don’t interact further than a friendship ,for example at the moment I don’t have a partner , It is not my intention to have a partner in the medium or perhaps in the long term, but that’s it I have to be more careful, and yes it changes everything , changes your vision, but I believe , the people you interact with is reduced, but those relations are more rich, more profound, more beautiful, at least that’s what I have been trying to work with my therapist

P – at this moment this affected your career in a devastating way

T – Look, there were 2 things, I don’t know if I should say “fortunately” but during this period there was a strike in USA, most of my work is in USA, so is not like I was able to work anyway and the strike ended 10 months after the scandal, so anyway I didn’t had the chance to work so there was not too much problem, but once the strike is over and things started to re-activate, above all in Mexico, it becomes complicated for me , because this scares and puts in alert to producers, platforms, brands and more, even events, events that commonly actors are invited, they start to put some distance, but I don’t feel that is a distance of rejection, but more like a distance of alert, like saying look we don’t have any problem with you but solve this, the thing is to solve this topic, when we start to get the information it was like wait, here are shady things.

P – Let’s say when the bomb exploded, did you had the chance to talk with miss Rios?

T – the first time that she talked within the group, yes, I talked to her

P – But when it exploded on the internet?

T – When, the first, let’s say the first time that she talked publicly it was a week and a half, a week after I had a reunion with the president in the national palace, then when that happened it was like , wait, 2 or 3 weeks before you just sent me a beautiful message telling me that you loved me, that you admired me , that you were glad that we met she told me beautiful things in that message, after, I was in the period of interviews, tours and more (note: this was during the time of BPWF press tour) when I go back to normal, I met the president and 10 days after this appears and it was like wow, so the last communication I had with her was like “what happened?” and her replies were very aggressive, so I called the lawyers and they told me “zero contact, we understand that you want to fix things, we understand that she is important to you but us as lawyers we have to tell you that this , this cannot be fixed in a personal way, you have to stop here because from now you have to think that this person is dedicated to harm you” , we didn’t understood yet what kind of harm , that came after, when information starts coming and it was like ah! So there are bad intentions

P – at this moment you feel that you are restarting your career?

T – Yes, but not only the career, the life as well, everything and I feel , it might sound weird but I’m feeling positive, happy, and above all I feel with a lot of energy like with euphoria to start my life you know, I have always had a beautiful relationship with my daughters, but now the teenager is now a little person a little adult , with her my relationship has become super endearing, the little one always had mamitis (Mexican expression for wanting to be only with the mother) and now she has papitis (same with mamitis but with the father) so you know that

P – You spend much time with them?

T – Yes

P – You live together

T – No but the older ones is one week with me and one week with her mother

P – Are they from different mothers?

T – Yes, and the little one, she was born during the pandemic, her mother and I didn’t have anything else to do so we put ourselves to…. Kisses to her mom, she is a beauty

P – You live with her?

[howlsofbloodhounds]

I need to see more content of Color matching Killer's freak, and not just in terms of suggestive themes.

Obviously he's not direct or loud about it, obviously it's not easy reading that off of a person like him, but I imagine Killer would pick up early that Color's a bit of a freak cause why the hell else would he be trying to help him so much? Freak recognizes freak. Freakception. It's just kind freak on fire vs knife freak, that's what this has become.

Color is the subtle kind of freak. There is always a 50/50 chance that if Killer's got an urge, Color's gonna indulge it and act like he always does in the process. He is a "go with the flow" kind of guy on the surface until he decides to rip off that facade. His friends already know how freakish he is to a certain extent but it's people like Killer, Epic, and Delta that truly do vibe with it in their own ways.

Killer would want more of it and look for ways to encourage Color's "dark side", Delta would compete with it, and Epic would think of any punchline to add to how hilarious he finds it.

This is a group of equally as unhinged men.

The signs of Color's freak would be evident to Killer long before he decides to take up Color's offer in leaving Nightmare behind. He would pick up those signs and use them against him, specifically during arguments or fights where Killer accuses him of having crude ulterior motives.

And Color giving him little to no reactions on that basis would not only infuriate Killer but also fascinate him even more than he already was. Cause he can't always tell whether or not a comment set something off in Color's mind, or if there really was nnothing.

And then as time continues to pass, that is when Killer's observations start to make sense. He and Color are a lot more alike than he previously thought, well beyond the "we both used to be Sans and got fucked over by the same stupid kid" commonality.

They both have deeply-rooted trauma from two of the same fucking child. While Color was eventually provided with the resources to start healing, Killer was routinely denied those resources.

Perhaps Color has one of those warped bouts of hyena-like laughter too, except while Killer has it casually, it's a red flag coming from Color as it's indicative of a panic attack, complete breakdown, or weak attempt at stress relief following either of those things.

They both struggle at showing vulnerability because of their trauma. Killer hides that in multiple shitty ways while Color has had several years of therapy and a solid support system and because of that developed a stable "fake it till you make it" mask for only the worst case scenarios where he can't catch a break soon enough. (He's had to use that mask A LOT in dealing with Killer before he left Nightmare)

Think Stage 3 doesn't have enough reasons to regard Color as a source of safety? They've both got distinct animalistic traits and behaviors, and Color dedicated the patience and time to let Stage 3 learn that at its own pace. Stage 3 finds a mutual understanding with Color that it can't with anyone else BECAUSE of the effort and comfort Color provided.

And what about the fact that they've both lost their sense of identity and since gaining freedom had to gradually make a new one with the shards they managed to salvage? They both aim to keep some aspects of "Sans", but can never truly be "Sans" again. They've both grown past the point of ever being the exact same as they were decades, perhaps hundreds of years before.

In various ways both before and after escaping their traumas, they are both in constant physical, mental, and emotional pain. Some conditions simply have no cure, no medication to soothe their symptoms.

They are so similar yet so different. So of course Color would match Killer's freak. Under calm and casual circumstances he'd agree with (Stage 2) Killer's accusation of him being a masochist and Killer would be caught off guard because he was aiming to make Color angry. But instead Color gives him that simple admission with no strings attached.

Like golly gee fuck, Killer, it's almost like he has to be one in order to cope with the amount of agony he deals with every day. Speak for yourself, motherfucker.

Unhinged freaky old men is where it’s at.

People look at the chromatic crew and think Color’s the odd one out, that he’s the hinged one, but definitely not.

Bro probably finds it comforting and reassuring when killer licks away his tears 💀. Mans would be so willing to indulge nearly anything killer wants to try or do, and he’d likely enjoy most of it.

Need more of Color matching Killer’s freak and rolling with it. Wonder if Color ever surprises Killer sometimes.

[brucewaynehater101]

I want Duke included in batfam family fics. being the older sibling Damian needs, relatable yet guiding. Tim being ‘Dukes robin’ and having lots of respect for Tim yet he’d also steal his slice of pie. Duke and Jason hanging out, and Jason appreciating how he never tries to lecture him. Duke and dick matching vibes (or as much as they can) when on patrol and somewhat in the family, and both trying to make their brothers calm tf down. Bruce trying desperately to not fuck up with Duke like he did his other sons, only serving to confuse and slightly alarm Duke. Alfred and duke being the only ones with more then *1* braincell.

he also has so much potential for angst of being a meta in a family everyone thinks hates metas, and people somehow forget him???

(I have more just don’t have the energy to write it all down)

Heck yes! I agree that Duke needs to be included in more batfam fics (and especially as a more pivotal role). I personally try to add him a bit, but I fear I do not include him enough as a key member of the batfam.

Duke is hella important and should be treated as such. I'd love to see more fics with him pissing off GCPD for fun. Just chaos and pranks against GCPD, rogues, Batman, and the Batkids. Also, he should he allowed to punch (or kick) as many JL members as he pleases (Hal was just the first).

Duke and Dick having similar fashion ideas is a cute idea I've seen in the fandom. I would also just love to see more fanart of Duke rocking some fun outfits for galas (especially if the galas follow the AU of Gotham being super weird with their social norms). Duke being featured on magazine covers, being asked to model, and being interviewed would be cool fanwork ideas to play around with. I've seen so many of the other batboys and none with Duke as a magazine cover.

Here's my ideas on how Duke could interact with different batfam members. Feel free to reblog if you have ideas yourself or think the dynamic should be different.

I feel like Duke and Cass would get along really well as chaos gremlins who get away with their shenanigans. Messing with Commissioner Gordon is a favorite pass time of theirs. For some reason, even when presented with evidence, Bruce doesn't believe that Duke and Cass would do the things they get away with. It's both impressive and annoying to the other batkids.

Duke could have a weird relationship with Tim. On one hand, Tim is Duke's Robin. The cases he's solved, feats he's accomplished, and respect Gotham has for Tim's Robin in general (for being Batman's therapy kid) are unfathomable. On the other hand, he's seen Tim walk into the same wall four times within three minutes. They both share a love for riddles, but Tim can be an idiot at interpersonal relationships.

For Damian, Duke has seen how the world picks up kids and spits them out. He's seen kids lashing out, how they merely want to defend themselves, and how fantastic they are once you get to know them. He's been angry and spiteful at the world too. For Damian, Duke's hella impressed at the kid's heart despite all the shit he's been dealt. Duke would encourage chaos, talk with the kid about how different emotions have impacted Duke's actions and life, and is an overall supportive figure. They can often be seen doing both wild stunts and "common for their age group" activities for fun (although the game Sorry is banned because of them).

Jason and Duke would probably have a complicated relationship due to Red Hood's actions. Their similar childhoods (as far as economically and location based) would lead to jokes and shared customs that they chat with Steph about (such as Creepy Toe Joe or that specific gas station or the phrase they say as they passed that one pothole). Despite that, they have different viewpoints on Bruce and murder.

Duke is probably one of the more emotionally intelligent and communicative batfam members. If Alfred is the sassy version, Duke would get a good laugh out of those remarks and the astute observations.

Bruce and Duke angst could go hard. Bruce is trying so hard not to make his past mistakes. Duke and his perception of Bruce (he holds Bruce in high regard) and how that affects their relationship.

As far as Duke being in a "perceived to hate metas" family, that could either be hilarious or angst. I imagine people trying to intervene or "save" Duke from the Bats would be infuriating and sad to see.

Duke could also laugh at the batkids' superhero friends and how they, even as adults, are banned from entering Gotham. Duke is free to live in the manor and come and go as he pleases. Any of the batkid's meta friends have to be snuck into Gotham.

[minervadashwood]

i watched a movie tonight called i saw the tv glow, and it was a movie about trans identity.

I especially resonated with the theme of wanting to stay in your comfort place. But when you begin realizing you are different, you also realize that your comfort place cannot contain the new you. so, you have to decide whether to block out the new you and continue to live the life that comforts you. Or to acknowledge and become your new self, while potentially giving up your home and family (both literally and metaphorically.)

*

I didn't realize I was nonbinary until my 30s. That is when I discovered the concept existed. Of course, I always felt left out, "off", or forced to play a role.

In my adulthood, after going through therapy for childhood emotional and physical abuse, I maintain the semblance of a normal relationship with my family. I've come out to them all. My parents either did not understand or pretended not to. My brothers said they understood, but afterwards acted like it didn't happen.

I'm reminded of the concept of the "unsayable" in literature and in life. Sometimes language fails us--or we know the words to say but cannot speak them. Fortunately, this is rarely a problem for me.

However, it is a problem for most people I was close to before I came out. My family cannot talk about any LGBTQIA topic without my parents clamming up, or later saying "I just think something went bad in the way those people were raised."

Ironically enough, I could be evidence of that erroneous claim. My gender was policed frequently when I was growing up, even well into adulthood. I know now it's because they were afraid of me being a lesbian. Jokes on them, I don't have a gender and don't care all that much about sex with anyone.

Every time they plan a "girls" night, or mom buys gifts for her "daughters" (my sisters in law and me). Or I am excluded from activities my brothers plan because it's a guy thing." I get left out 2-fold, relegated to socializing with my SILs and not my siblings, and dismissing my gender completely. Probably one of the most hurtful conversations recently is how joyous my entire family was upon learning my SIL's upcoming baby is a boy. Finally someone else to carry on the family name. Guess my family is carrying on another tradition: making a lifetime's worth of assumption assumptions about a child based on what's between their legs.

*

I turn 40 this month. My parents will likely pass away before I turn 50. I will miss them. I cry thinking of it. But I also wonder if it won't be freeing, too. I have in many ways outgrown the person they think I am, the person the subtly try to make me with underhanded comments or--even worse--their silence.

"I love you," they will say. But can they? Can they love the person I have become? The person I am now? Perhaps they are limited to loving me conceptually. Daily, I try to make my peace with that.

I don't have a replacement or "found" family. At least not yet. I have friends and a partner who accept me. But there is not that sense of acceptance and belonging to a group, the surety of unconditional love among more than two people.

Many of us are familiar with stories of outright rejection. Of parents disowning their children, of banishing them from home. It's heartbreaking, and those stories need to be told. I'll listen raptly every time someone shares one with me.

But perhaps there are other stories we can pay attention to. The less overt rejections, the conditional acknowledgements, the subtle erasure of our identities in favor of conformity and feigned ignorance.

I'd like to hear those more. This one was mine.

[zyafics]

Hiiiii! What do you think about Kiiara and Rafe dynamic? I don’t think that they should be romantic at all, but I do think they have a very complex and interesting relationship and I wish we would’ve seen that more this season. I agree with y him telling Kiara that’s he’s a killer was such a dramatic shift. That could’ve been a very emotionally weighted scene and they missed a mark with that.. I don’t know if the writers were intentionally doing this but him admitting to her should’ve been more pointed. I think she’s really the only one in the group that has ever seen him show some type of remorse. Kiara is such a morally strong character. She’s willing to risk her life for literally anyone, even those who done her wrong . Where is Rafe does the same thing in a way but for his dad? he also thinks throughout the season that he’s doing the right thing or at least trying to. What do you think?

here's the thing, i think the pates are planting the seeds for riara. and as much as we don't like it, that doesn't stop the fact that there's a bunch of riara shippers on twt that are vocal and PROUD, and i'm almost certain the pates had to see SOME of their tweets at some point.

i haven't watched the season, but i can't help but think of two specific scenes in pt2 that is evidence for my hypothesis. which is, kie was the one who got the knife and cut rafe out, and kie told rafe not to go out there because he'll get killed and he said "he's a killer too," he's admitting intimate details to kie that sofia doesn't even access to. remember the proposal? remember when she tried to tell him about the hollis deal, and he said he's done worse but he never went into details. why is it KIE that gets rafe's first on-screen admission of guilt? that must've been such an awakening to him and he professes to some stranger? absolutely not. it should've been sarah, but since it's not, i fear it's setting up a romantic link.

i think kiara and rafe had a very interesting dynamic simply because he sees her as both a kook and pogue, and he refers to her with a sense of familiarity that she doesn't outright hate. however, there's a large gap in maturity and age, and i don't think it would work with what happened in s4. kie is grieving, and i hate the fact that they're trying to pair people together just to find an ending. kie should be alone and figuring it out! she has her friends and a support system for that.

lastly, i agree that kie is a morally strong character. she has a strong sense of empathy that guides her decision and she has a strong sense of justice too. so despite rafe having tried to kill her, and everything he's done (esp in s3) she still doesn't seem okay with the idea of him sacrificing himself or dying regardless of that.

rafe is more.. mature, but he had his slips of psychopathy in this season (which i love). he isn't completely changed, and i don't want the narrative to shove down our throats that he has. i doubt he would've gotten cleaned of cocaine by himself, i doubt that he's receiving therapy. he can't be this level-headed, and in the moments that he isn't—it shows the rafe that we all know from all the previous seasons. i like a gradual built of rafe demonstrating his slow changes. where he is piecing together what is right and wrong. where he's trying to find a moral balance of what he wants and what is right. but i still want him to hold onto that characteristic that made him him—his ruthlessness where he goes from A -> B with little regards on the steps that made him there. he called himself proactive? i truly believe that. he's so simple-minded, that he doesn't think of long-term consequences but rather how does he get something done the quickest, fastest way. i want that to be challenged with his growing emotional maturity.

[kn-1013]

been recently coming up with this sally face au where the cult is still there, except like in real life, what they believe in is bullshit. there's no magic, because magic isn't real, they're just batshit, and the main focus of the story involves the sally gang + travis taking them down with the help of the FBI or something for all those murders.

jim johnson went into witness protection after witnessing the murders of greg, stacy and megan, which is why he isn't there. sandy was murdered by charley after stealing the book from the cult years later when sal moved in. rosenberg is the only survivor of that group that tried to take the cult down and has since lost hope of ever taking them down. terrance addison's entire family was murdered by the cult, and he's become severely agoraphobic as a result.

the ghosts are real, but they can't do much except tell their stories in the hopes that they'll be able to eventually move on. they tell their stories to the sally gang, who work on trying to piece together a timeline of events + evidence to send off and take the cult down.

when travis turns 18 and his father starts really indoctrinating him, he talks with the sally gang and agrees to help them take the cult down by joining and being their inside man, and they keep evidence of the cult's deeds in the secure shed-thing in the backyard of the college house.

when the cult gets taken down, jim johnson is able to come back and explain why he left, and travis and madeline testify against their father in court, betraying their sister mary, and throwing a number of prominent nockfellians into jail.

i like to keep travis as a middle child, so i'm imagining that when this is all done, he ends up having to take care of madeline through the rest of her high school days while they're living on their own now, getting insane amounts of therapy/exit counseling.

i don't know if i have the energy to write an entire fic for this but i'd really like to explore the idea, especially if other people are interested/willing to engage.

[i-like-rocks22]

I watched the Squid Game reality series so you don't have to.

1. It is just as grim and psychologically intense as the show. I went into it not knowing anything about the set up and expecting the format to have been changed to be less nightmarish; maybe the games would be fun versions, maybe smaller prizes would be available for individuals or teams, or different stages of the game would have different casts. Nope.

2. It isn't funny. It's overly dramatised (it's produced in the style of US reality shows so it really focuses on the worst in people). Something I didn't expect and was absolutely astounded to see is that the contestants have to fake being shot as a black inkpack on their chest explodes when they're eliminated. Some of them have a bit of fun doing an over dramatic fall to the ground. Most just sit down looking completely destroyed which, when you consider the format and the reasons people are there (severely in debt, can't retire, disabled children that need care) it's just absolutely vile.

(Honourable mention to the only funny bit of editing in the show: when the remaining 20 contestants get together in a circle to discuss the next task, the very American team captain gives a motivational pep talk consisting entirely of buzz words, then goes 'let's pray' and it immediately swaps to focus on the remaining Brits who look absolutely horrified (for those outside of the UK most Brits are either non-religious or very quietly religious and find overt showings of religion like group prayer really weird)).

3. Deeply uncomfortable by the editing and voiceover choices that repeatedly portrayed black people, particularly black women, as the 'villains'. It was very very noticeable. There was a particular interaction where a black woman was shown in a very negative light, and I am still unclear on what happened during the show (due to the choppy and unclear editing) and cagey responses from contestants in interviews after. VERY very strange, and has led to that black contestant receiving a lot of hate.

4. The amount of contestants breaking down emotionally through the show makes so much sense not only when you consider the conditions they were being kept in, but the sheer amount of bonus psychological fuckery that was included. Not just the main tasks but additional challenges, individual tasks, and public votes for eliminations. A lot of these happened at random in the dorm rooms meaning they had no true safe space in which to relax. The filming was evidently over at least a week and I can't imagine how emotionally exhausted they must have been. I hope the contestants would have been offered some therapy on leaving but I don't think that's likely.

5. The one shining light in the whole show was how, very differently to the original series, individuals started to work together much earlier and more thoroughly through the tasks. Lots of people offered support and words of kindness to those struggling and appeared to really bond. In the end, while a grim and unsatisfying watch, that was the one thing I took away.

I am perfectly happy to watch some trashy TV from time to time and I don't believe every thing you watch should necessarily be dissected for it's greater meaning. But, not surprisingly when considering the source material, this was so far beyond trashy; it was exploitative and depressing and I can't believe it actually got (excuse the pun) green lit.

TL:DR; the black mirror episode that would be based off of squid game? Yeah that was it.

[polychaeteworm]

Some otherkin positivity today:

I know a lot of us keep it a secret or start out not telling therapists because we think they will invalidate us because they don't get it, even though there's definitely psychological evidence of it.

So I'm really grateful for the therapists that have a "meet you where you are" approach.

My therapist is familiar with otherkin concepts and has stated he has other patients who are otherkin, but that my system is his first encounter with aliens. We are always the first group of aliens a therapist has met, even if they are familiar with otherkin and this guys way of dealing with it is so so so much better than every other therapist I've had and it's actually funny in a validating way.

He treats therapy like he's the human that has made First Contact and he's paid to do it. when I talk about the delusion I have where I feel like people are gonna find out I'm not human, in like a bad way, he will ask what might give me away and then happily say that "you'll be relieved to know humans do that too, AND we also worry about it!" In a tone that is more "wow the universe is amazing" than it is "c'mon snap outta it."

Good therapy exists.

[hiskillingjar]

Genderbend (All/MC)

day 28: genderbend second person. cw for dubious consent (drunk sex) and some (reclaimed) slur use. also general heads up for a trans woman's junk being referred to as a cock. be cool.

love you lesbians xo

🥀

"Mmph,"

You groaned softly against Law's lips as she pressed her body close, her slim hips bucking down against yours while she was perched in your lap. Her long skirt rode up her long legs and around her (heavily scarred) thighs, a firm grip on your shoulders, as she kept your body still with her own, rutting together on top of her bed.

"Ahhnn..."

You had gone round to her apartment after group therapy, since she had been kind enough to invite you round. You understood, in a way. You had spilled something particularly difficult during circle talk, and you were feeling delicate for one reason or another, and...well, one thing had led to another, as they often tended to do with the two of you.

Law kissed the same way she spoke at therapy; not at all and then all at once, her hungry mouth pressing down against yours and her probing tongue running over your parted lips as she inched closer, like she was desperate to have you, desperate to claim every inch of you as her own.

You kind of liked that. 

You'd always had kind of a thing for possessive girls, after all.

"Is this okay?" She murmured hotly against your lips, running the (bumped) bridge of her nose against yours as her blonde brows furrowed beneath her bangs, just slightly, worry clear on her pretty face. "I mean, I know group was...hard for you today. You said something pretty intense, so I just wanted to be sure-"

"Yes, Law, everything is fine," You interrupted her, curtly enough that she pulled back from the kiss, her face flushed and her kiss-bitten lips parting with a little surprise. "I mean...ah, sorry, I just don't need to talk about it, especially not right now and...you know, not with you. You know how it is..."

"Yeah," She nodded, reaching up to gently sweep a lock of her blonde hair behind her ear (her nails were painted black like yours were), nibbling her lip shyly. "Yeah, don't worry, I know what you mean...I won't mention it again."

"Thank you," You replied with a slightly uneasy smile, wiping your wet lips with the back of your hand as you slid your palm down her back to pull her in closer, enjoying her comforting warmth against you. "But, ah...do you think we can change this over?" 

"Hm?" She blinked her doe-grey eyes down at you, her expression curious despite how much her body trembled under your touch. "What do you mean?"

"I mean," You murmured into her shoulder, peering at where her laptop was perched on her desk, playing a video. "Jeez, Law, did you have to put on one of your websites again? This is...kind of distracting..."

Maybe you wouldn't have minded if she was playing something random, a romance movie or a bad porno, something to set the mood and to get the two of you hot and bothered.

But... 

Law's watching habits were a little, uh...unhealthy to say the least. 

You had tried to pretend the 'Best Gore' compilation she watched every time you were around, the times when the two of you would smoke yourselves silly and fuck all night long, was just footage from a particularly graphic horror movie, things you were acquainted with and enjoyed plenty, but...

You couldn't pretend every time.

You took a guess that this clip was someone getting hit by a car. Not the worst you'd seen, there was barely any blood and no audio, but still...it was just dehumanising and repulsive all the same, seeing someone die on screen. 

"It's...it's not that bad," She replied, though her cheeks were flushed a little darker like she had been caught doing something that she shouldn't have. You had a sense that she was self-conscious about this habit of hers, but evidently not enough to actually stop it. "Really, there's...a lot worse out there. This is a pretty tame one."

"I don't like that you said that," You mumbled, pressing your face into her shoulder, doing your best to not look at the screen as your hands slipped from her back and down to her hips, doing your best to still her as she moved. “I don’t like that there’s tame and…like, extreme to you. You shouldn’t watch this stuff.”

Your hands evidently did nothing to stop her since she groaned softly, rocking her hips down against yours and giving away instantly how excited she was. You would have been turned on, maybe even desperately, if your eyes didn't keep flitting to her laptop screen with a little frown.

"And it's really grossing me out," In your peripheral vision, you saw the next clip start to play; the grating teeth of a saw cutting through a living subject, a war injury, you assumed, while the guy screamed bloody murder. You instantly pressed your face a little harder into her skin and clung to her tight. "And killing the mood, ya know."

"Come on," She whispered, her low voice a gentle coo (almost maternal, if you wanted to get even more fucked up and Freudian and god, if she wanted you to call her 'mommy', you just might have), as she stroked through your hair and pressed closer too, letting her legs spread even more so that her skirt had ridden up completely, exposing the tight waistband of her tights, the straining gusset of her dark boyshorts underneath, the hard line of her cock. "It's just...how life is, you know? Sometimes, it's good to see death to make you appreciate how good you have it."

"Okay, John Kramer," You said with an uncomfortable laugh, though you could tell that she didn't get your joke when she kept going, taking one of your hands from her hips and guiding it up to her chest. Her small breast filled your palm nicely when you pushed your hand past her low-cut shirt and into the cup of her bralette, and she clearly enjoyed it when you touched her cool skin, since she was still moaning. "C'mon, Law, let's watch a porno or something. I wanna get in the mood for when you fuck me..."

"I don't want to watch porn. I don't like porn." Lawrence murmured with a little pout, shifting in your lap and reaching up to unbutton her shirt and slide it down her shoulders exposing her skimpy bralette and pale, freckled shoulders and chest, before placing her hands between your legs and unzipping your jeans. "Besides...you like horror movies, don't you? Just…think of this like one of those."

Once your jeans were open, her hand moved up to your stomach and slipped inside your underwear.

"Ahhhn..." You moaned as she pressed her fingers into your panties, shivering a little more as you held her tight and shifted your hips upwards, trying to urge her to press even deeper, feel the wetness of your cunt. "Law, please..."

"You know you like it," Her lips brushed against your ear in a gentle kiss, her voice going quieter than before as her fingers brushed up against each nerve inside you, relishing in your slick wetness. "Well, I know you do, anyway...and that's probably all that matters."

🦊

"Oh, shit!" 

You dashed out of the open doorway of the convention's midnight rave at the familiar sound of retching, running to the aid of the familiar girl who was hunched over in an alley by herself, fighting through your own intoxication and inebriation to help someone in need.

"Ohmigod, Ren, are you okay?" You said, kneeling behind her and rubbing a hand up and down her back, the silk of her cheap cosplay outfit smooth on your palm. "I'm soooo sorry I lost you at the rave, did you drink too much?"

"H-Huh?"

Ren glanced back at you over her shoulder, her short hair poking out under her wig, she was so disheveled, and vomit streaked down her chin, messing up her make-up. 

"Mph...y-yeah, I drank a little," She murmured with a heavy sigh, evidently fighting to keep in what little contents were still in her stomach, reaching up to wipe her teary eyes (and staining her gloves as she did so). "Guys kept buying me drinks while I was standing at the bar waiting for you too. Totally gross." She stuck her tongue out with a frown, letting her heavy head rest back against the brick wall of the alleyway. "H-How about you, are you drunk too?"

"Mmhmm," You said with a bashful smile, sitting down with her on the wet cement floor and rubbing her back encouragingly, trying to help her stomach settle. "I didn't get bought drinks though, so I'm not puking my guts out like you are."

"Mm, I'm not surprised," She replied with a tipsy, little giggle, letting her head rest on your shoulder as she curled up close, her tail grazing your ankles as it curled around you. "Like, I do look pretty cute. I think I deserve more attention because of that."

"Lower that ego, honey," You chuckled with a roll of your eyes, nuzzling your face against the shiny plastic crown of her wig, giving it a light tug. "Or don't...that confidence might actually have been pretty sexy if you weren't covered in vomit."

"Well, you're pretty sexy, too." She said, pressing her sweaty face up against your neck, scenting you, enjoying you as her tail began to wag more. "I think the nerdy guys didn't hit on you, because they were intimidated by how hot you are in this outfit. Not like I blame them, either."

"Oh yeah?" You said with a raised brow and a slight smirk, letting your hand drift down her neck, toying with the stiff collar of her blouse, down her slim shoulder. "You like my outfit, Ren?"

"Mmm, you know it." She purred (despite how much her voice was still slurring from intoxication), rubbing her nose against your neck as her own hands drifted down your front, feeling your soft chest while her golden eyes flitted up and down your face, landing on your lips. "I don't think I could keep my hands off you..."

You tilted your head, your smirk growing a little broader.

"Maybe you shouldn't keep your hands off of me then..." You suggested, leaning in a little closer, running your lips off of hers. "If you want to, of course."

Ren gave your collar a playful tug with a sharp-toothed grin, her fangs grazing over yours, before she placed a hand around the back of your neck and pulled you into a close kiss. Your body was supple and pliable in her hands, and you groaned softly into the kiss, pressing closer to her as she gripped the collar a little tighter, pinning your lips against hers, asserting her control, her dominance, even when she was drunk.

"Mine," She whispered against your lips, continuing to run kisses across your face and down your exposed neck, her hands roving over your body, feeling your skin beneath the cheap cosplay. Her breath was hot and warm on your throat and made you shiver. "Mine..."

“Possessive,” You murmured, chasing after another kiss as you threaded your arms around her neck, keeping her close. “And you taste like vomit.”

She giggled softly, her hands running further down your body, over the tight elastic of your thigh-high stocking and to the soft flesh spilling over the top.

"I think you taste worse." She pressed her mouth further down your neck, digging her nails into your thighs and letting her fingers slip up a little further, against the slowly soaking gusset of your panties beneath your skirt. “I’m gonna get a better taste, I think…”

Before you could stop her, she sank down onto her knees, the wet damp of the cement floor soaking into her own thigh highs, nestling her face beneath your skirt and cheap petticoat, and ran her tongue over the front of your panties, doing her best to get a taste of you.

You shrieked with delight at the action, letting your fingers curl into the cheap fibers of her wig and pull her even closer, rutting your hips down against her face, her tongue.

"Hm, I thought so." She teased, pulling back to breathe hotly against your cunt, your trembling thighs, pressing a harsh bite against the soft flesh. "Maybe I'll get the chance to do even more if I can drag you somewhere... quieter,” She cut herself off by pressing another bite left into your thigh, sure to bruise. “More private. So I can have you like I want you.”

"Why do you wanna do that?" You asked softly, a slight pout to your lips as you reached your fingers into the netting of her wig and tried to pull her in closer. "Whyyyy, Ren?~"

"I think you're cute when you're a little tipsy." She whispered with a teasing grin, pressing another hungry kiss against the front of your panties, her trembling hands on your thighs as they flinched at the action, making you moan. "That's why."

“Ngh, god,” You moaned, biting your lips as your hips shifted forward a little more, your heeled boots doing nothing to support your body as you slid slowly against the cement and the rough brick wall. “Ren, we’re both drunk, we shouldn’t…hah…”

“I don’t care about that, and neither do you.” She chided, almost condescendingly, and it was enough to make you blush (even if she was a lot drunker than you). “I want to have fun with you, you know that." She pressed another hot kiss against your panties, one hand reaching forward to tug at the sodden gusset and tug them to the side of your puffy labia. “And I’m going to have fun…and you’re going to, too, if you play along with me.”

She ran her tongue over the hot slit of your cunt, her golden eyes going hazy at your taste, at the sound of your hungry moan, at the feel of your fingers pushing her wig aside and fist into her hair.

“Yeah, yeah,” You moaned loudly, your head falling backward. “I’ll play along, I will.”

🔨

"Alright, let me just get the door."

Strade's voice was cheerful behind you, cutting through the haze of drunkenness on your mind as she took a set of house keys from a carabiner attached to her belt loop, giving it an idle twirl around her finger before she slotted it into the front door of her house. 

"You'll have to forgive me if the place is a bit of a mess," She mused with a hum, opening the door (and clipping the keys back to her belt) and running a hand through her short brown hair, before placing her hands on her full hips. "I've always been lousy at keeping a house. So much for gender roles, right?

You laughed a little uncomfortably as she gave you a playful nudge in the side with her elbow. She was a little shorter than you, but she still managed to make you nervous, which you're certain you would have been, even if you weren't a little drunk.

"Y-Yeah," You muttered, pushing your hair out of your face with a shaking hand as you followed her inside the house. "Um, do you think I can have some water or something? I'm feeling kind of nauseous."

"Sure thing, buddy." She said with an easy smile and a slight nod of her head. "Go sit down and I'll get you something to drink. Just relax, and I'll take good care of you"

Strade leaves you to it, making her way through the dark house and turning on the kitchen light at your side, still humming to herself, comfortable in the face of your obvious discomfort.

You let out a quiet sigh as you shambled into the living room of the house, noticing, even in the dark, a fairly tidy space, albeit one that had nowhere near the amount of personality that Strade seemed to have. Either way, you didn't let yourself worry too much about it as you sat down on the couch, resting your hands in your lap and letting your head droop down and your hair cover your face again, to stop it from spinning too much. 

You were really drunk. You couldn't remember how much you drank at the bar, but surely, not enough to feel like this.

You sighed again, covering your mouth as you began to feel queasy, a little worried that you might be sick before you reached back to your back pocket to get your phone, to shoot a text to your housemate so she knew you were okay, and maybe call an Uber to pick you up, hiked fare be damned.

Strade had been nice enough to look after you at the bar and take you home, but you really didn't want to be more of a nuisance to her than you already had been. 

She was really way too nice.

"Drink up." 

You flinched at the sound of Strade's voice in the silence of the house, glancing over your shoulder as she paced into the living room with a glass of water for you. You stopped feeling around for your phone when you couldn't immediately find it and gave her an appreciative smile.

"You're looking pretty rough," She teased with a little smirk, passing you the glass and sitting at your side, crossing her legs, a heavy army boot on her knee, and leaning back into the couch, a thick arm almost draping over your shoulder. "If you puke on my carpet, I'm gonna be pretty annoyed."

"I won't puke," You murmured around the rim of the glass after a long swallow of water, giving your head a quick shake, to which she laughed and reached over to pat your back and rub your shoulder. "Um, did you see my phone in your car, by the way? I can't...seem to find it."

"Hm?" She raised a dark brow in your direction before she let out another chuckle, her golden eyes sparkling. "Oh, yeah, you mean this one?"

She took the phone from one of her front pockets, giving it a little wave as she held it up for you to see. The screen was black, which you could only interpret as it being dead.

"Mmhmm, thank you," You nodded, leaning forward to take the phone, and blinking curiously when she held it out of your reach with a teasing chuckle.

"What'll you give me for it?" She asked, her voice taking on a lower, slightly more sultry tone, distinctly different from the bright and cheerful voice you heard in the bar, enough to make you blush and flounder.

"Um...S-Strade, I'm pretty drunk," You said with an uncomfortable chuckle. "It wouldn't be right for us to...do something."

"Mm, you were the one who was thinking it though," She laughed, placing the phone down on her side of the couch, before moving in a little closer and placing a firm hand on your thigh. "Come on. I won't tell if you don't. It can be our little secret, hm?"

You swallowed hard, your eyes flitting down to her hand on your thigh, as her fingers toyed with one of the ladders in your tights and felt your hot skin. 

"I don't...think this is a good idea," You murmured again, holding the glass a little tighter, your hands shaking.

"So don't think," She said. "Just do."

You couldn't hold back a cry as she reached up to tangle her fingers into your hair roughly, pulling your head down to her broad thigh (making you drop your glass in the process) as her other hand reached up to unzip her trousers and wrestle them down her spread legs.

You were too drunk to really fight back as she pulled your head upwards and forced your face against the front of her underwear (she was wearing boxers, to your surprise), and your body was totally slack as she gradually began to buck her hips up against your face, a long groan on her lips as she bit her lips, her eyes open and feral and hungry.

"You know, I said I'd be annoyed if you puked on my carpet," She started, her voice a little more rasped as she reached up to pull at the waistband of her boxers. "But, ah...I guess I wouldn't care too much." She let out a dirty chuckle, as she pulled one leg from her trousers and boxers and raised it high, resting it on the back of the couch, spreading herself out for you. "As long as you cleaned up your mess."

Your mouth went dry as you looked at her, her thick legs spread, her cunt so wet that it was making the dark, matted hair that covered it and her inner thighs shine in the low light of the living room. 

Had she been this turned on when she was just speaking to you at the bar?

Or was it having you in her house, vulnerable, waiting to be taken?

You were too drunk to really consent to any of this, but you wouldn't have gone home with an older woman if you hadn't been hammered. Did the matter of consent really matter that much?

You didn't think so, not now, and clearly, Strade thought the same way.

"Go on," She said, gripping a thicker chunk of your hair and urging your face down to the hot heat of her spread cunt. "Eat my pussy like I know you want to."

You did as you were told, lowering your head to run your tongue over her slit, tasting the thick musk of pre-cum and sweat and hair, and everything.

Strade groaned through her teeth, low at the back of her throat, gripping your hair more tightly as she shifted her hips upwards to feel your tongue even deeper, your nose bumping against her erect clit and giving her a little more stimulation.

"Are you sure you're not a dyke?" She asked with another rough chuckle, as her spread leg hooked around your neck and pulled you closer towards her, tethering you and keeping you still. "Or have you just done this a few times before?"

You groaned softly at the slur, her rough voice and language, and the new tightness around your neck as you managed to run your tongue over the damp hairs of her cunt and circle it towards her clit, wanting to please her and to offer yourself a little relief at the same time.

"I'm gonna keep you here tonight," She crooned, rubbing her fingers against your scalp, bucking her hips against your mouth with such ferocity, that you were almost worried that she might break your nose. "I've got a cock upstairs with your name on it...mm, maybe something else too, I can get as rough as you want, baby."

"Mmph," You moaned, your eyes fluttering as your arousal gradually began to supersede your intoxication, and you grew more desperate for her approval. "S-Strade, please..."

"What's that, fraulein ?" Her voice was a surprisingly seductive purr, her thick accent growing thicker when she used her native language. "You want me to fuck you? You wanna take my strap-on like the good, little dog that I know you are? Is that it?~"

You really should have ordered that Uber.

"Please.”

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

By: Kevin Ray

Published: Jun 27, 2024

I’m a gay man who is skeptical of the existence of a so-called “LGBT community.” The idea of this community is a belief rather than an objective truth, and I don’t affirm its existence for the sake of social niceties. Endorsing subjective beliefs to “be kind” is the behavior that landed society in the wreckage of Critical Social Justice activism. People have a right to their beliefs, and I have the right to write about why I don’t share those beliefs. 

Although there are indications that the tide is incrementally shifting, on much of the left, it is still the fashion of the day to view any dissenting arguments to popular subjective beliefs held by or about minority groups as anything from “not nice” to outright “hate.” I’d like this trend to go the way of bell-bottom jeans. That’s not going to happen until people get back into the habit of voicing their opposing views. In the interest of taking one small step toward ending “Cancel Culture,” I don’t ever say, “LGBT community.” 

The claim that an “LGBT community” exists must be supported by evidence that withstands scrutiny. The only evidence supporting this claim is a population of self-identified gay men, lesbian women, bisexual and transgender people living openly across the globe. But a population doesn’t make a community. Communities of affinity exist when members participate in events together and have a shared set of values. Many people within the LGBT population participate in communal events, but many don’t. The identity groups that comprise the “LGBT community” have extremely divergent interests, behaviors, and concerns—and share little in common aside from minority status that some relish in and others resent. Also, people who are gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender vary in a myriad of other identity characteristics and affinities, including age, race, political affiliation, citizenship status, income, and education level. The life experiences within this population are also varied. An out gay man in Seattle who enjoys the liberty of marching hand-in-hand with his boyfriend in a public parade has a wildly different life than his closeted counterpart in Tehran, who can be legally punished with up to 99 lashes or execution if convicted of sodomy under Islamic law. Everyone in this population does not meet together in communal celebrations, and they don’t share a monolithic set of values, behaviors, or life experiences.

Also, who is of this supposed community? Is a twenty-something man in a romantic relationship with a woman who, every now and then, decides to “take a walk on the wild side” with another man of the community? Is a thirty-something woman whose struggle with gender dysphoria desisted after years of exploratory psychodynamic therapy of the community? Was she of the community when she identified as male? Is she excommunicated now that her dysphoria has subsided? 

What about me? I happen to be a gay man; does that alone make me of this community? I used to go to gay bars, but I don’t anymore. I don’t attend events at the LGBT Center, and I don’t support it (or any LGBT organization) through monetary donations. I’ve never watched an episode of RuPaul’s Drag Race. I don’t identify as “queer,” and I reject its political aspirations. Despite living in New York City for over thirty years, I’ve never set foot on the gay mecca known as Fire Island, and I haven’t been to a Pride parade since 2007. Am I to understand that, merely because I am romantically, intimately, and sexually attracted to other men, this makes me of a community? Do I decide what communities I belong to, or does someone else decide that for me? 

I believe this decision is being made for me to satiate other people’s political agendas. When the incantation of an “LGBT community” is cast, it is often followed by political jujitsu, asserting this “community” has a unified belief, cause, or demand, which I’ve already argued is false. In truth, this mythical community is frequently conjured as a cudgel wielded by the left to blame, shame, and expunge those not willing to capitulate to the latest LGBTQIAA2S+ youth activist temper tantrum. Conversely, it’s used by the right as a political “wedge issue” to frighten voters away from electing any Democratic candidate, be they moderate centrists, radical progressives, or anywhere in between. 

Worse, viewing the population as a community can superimpose the idea that this group needs protection. This impulse to protect had disastrous outcomes during the monkeypox (Mpox) outbreak that began in May 2022. On July 15 of that year, The NYC Department of Health and Mental Hygiene (DOHMH) decided to change its messaging about how the virus is contracted. Some within the department feared promoting abstinence might “stigmatize” gay men. Instead of honestly telling people about the risks of contracting the virus during sex, DOHMH said, “[f]or those who choose to have sex while sick, … sores should be covered with clothing or sealed bandages.” Whistleblower Dr. Don Weiss, a senior epidemiologist at DOHMH, knew this approach was dangerous, and took his concerns to The New York Times. In their response statement, DOHMH said, “For decades, the L.G.B.T.Q.+ community has had their sex lives dissected, prescribed, and proscribed in myriad ways, mostly by heterosexual and cis people.” However, when I am at risk of contracting a virus that causes extreme pain and possible lifelong scarring, I can’t afford other people’s identity politics and their virtue-signaling protection of imaginary “communities.” Rather, I want the best medical advice available and I don’t care about the identity of the person who gives it to me or what “community” the person giving me the advice comes from! Ironically, it was not the “heterosexual and cis people” at DOHMH who gave me the best advice about avoiding Mpox. It was Andrew Sullivan, a gay male journalist who took to his podcasst The Weekly Dish along with gay activist Peter Staley. Their advice was, “cool it for a month.” Sullivan and Staley did not make me feel “stigmatized” by promoting abstinence. They told me the truth, which made me feel that somebody cared about me and my well-being. 

Identity divisiveness needs to stop. I don’t use the term “LGBT community” because I don’t believe it exists, it reduces a diverse population into a blunt, monolithic group, it reinforces an “us vs. them” mentality, and, as I just illustrated, it could be dangerous to my health. It fuels division at a time when Americans desperately need to come together. 

This Pride Month, it’s worth remembering that rights for LGBT people were secured because of the common humanity appeal made by those who said, “We live, laugh, and love just like you, all we want is the same rights everyone else has.” It’s time to stop segregating LGBT people into a “community” that is separate and apart from our wider society. It’s also time to realize that much of this divisive impulse is coming from within the LGBT population, and something needs to be done about it.

Gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender adults need to stop being afraid of what young LGBTQIAA2S+ activists might say and start speaking up. Each day that we don’t stand up to activist fits is one more day that someone else might get bullied, canceled, or worse. The inappropriate behavior of young activists must be confronted by adults who believe their behavior is harmful. LGBT grown-ups need to proudly re-assert that here and now is the best place and time to be out and proud, and it will only get better if activists stop behaving like the bullies who once persecuted us. Pride does not call for revenge for past injustices. The attacks on heteronormativity, the patriarchy, toxic masculinity, and the pronoun wars need to end; if civil rights for LGBT people are rolled back, it won’t be by “conservative” political maneuvering, it will be a self-inflicted wound caused by LGBTQIAA2S+ activists and their overblown tirades that eroded the goodwill and trust built over time by people who made advances through a common humanity appeal. Activists may not like “heteronormativity,” but they all have to learn to live in a world where the majority are heterosexual. Let's be frank—none of them would be alive without some heteronormative behavior, and they should show a little gratitude toward those who brought them into this world. 

If I were to speak to one of these young activists, I would share my message for Pride 2024, which would be this:

Gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender people are a minority, and that comes with challenges. Facing obstacles and overcoming them gives me a reason to get up in the morning—it gives purpose and meaning to my life. It’s also true that most people have challenges to navigate, so those who are LGBT are not unique in this regard. A life well-lived is not one spent wallowing in identity grievance and pursuing revenge for injustices you did not directly experience. Nobody is advocating for forgetting the wrongs that occurred in the past; it’s possible to recognize the history of injustices inflicted upon LGBT people in the past while also expressing gratitude for the wonderful advances that have been made. It’s your job to make the most of the hard-won rights that have been earned for you so you might use those rights to pursue a life of joy and fulfillment despite the challenges inherent in being a minority. It’s not always going to be easy. There will be good days and bad days. And while I can’t say there is a “community” to support you, there are many people among a population that know what you’re going through and want you to live life to the fullest. 

Happy Pride!

==

"A population doesn't make a community."