#everything is just worse year after year | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

yourheartinyourmouth · 7 months ago

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guys tell me i’m being silly for being disappointed that i didn’t get a call back today for a job i applied to friday

#like #logically i know i’m being silly #but after a year of applying for jobs and getting literally not a SINGLE call back #no interviews #they’re not even CALLING ME BACK #literally. an entire YEAR i have been applying with NOTHING coming back #i am just so completely disheartened #and of course this is a job that i desperately want #it makes good money and it’s doing something i am ACTUALLY GOOD AT #so of course i don’t expect a call back #but it’s for a company that a dear friend is a Valued Employee™️ at #so i was a referral #and networking is supposed to be the only way anyone gets a job #so like ????? 🤷‍♀️#but i just don’t expect anything good to happen at this point #everything is just worse year after year #so why the hell would i think i have anything more than a popsicle’s chance in Hell?????#ITS BEEN A YEAR OF NOT GETTING CALLED BACK #Hermes my man if you can do ANYTHING at all #i will idk #steal the declaration of independence or smn #ok no no i can’t actually follow through on that #i already need to build a Hermes altar in my new place #that was the deal #girl help

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fridgrave2-0 · 5 months ago

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hehe ghost-turbo haunting felix au

turbo is connected to the last piece of his code in the whole arcade - a trophy he gifted to felix in mid 80s as a symbol of him genuinely caring about their relationships on par with being the best racer. felix also gave him one of his medals and both kept their gifts next to other rewards, but when roadblasters and turbotime were unplugged, the medal was gone with everything else

now, after burning in cola-lava turbo is basically dead, but scraps of his code still were intertwined with the trophy (after all, it was his first winner's cup, but felix never knew about it), giving turbo an opportunity to exist as a shadow incapable of interacting with anything and anyone besides felix, who kept the trophy even after the roadblasters incident

also I went crazy in tags, feel free to check them out

#turbo #turbotastic #fix it felix jr #80s boyfriends #hammertastic #headcanon about them exchanging their trophies isn't mine but i loved it A LOT #and “darling” is turbo making fun of how felix was calling him in 80s #this hc about “doll” and “darling” pet names also is not mine but i adore it #turbo here is a complete freak who just stays around felix most of the time even when felix has moments with calhoun #and felix is an ass who keeps secrets from everyone bc he doesn't want his dirt to come out #he's ashamed of his previous relationship with turbo and doesn't want anyone to know any details #and calhoun to just know about it #this just gets worse and worse #they also didn't actually break up and were still technically dating when turbo went gamejumping #and he's mad af at felix because he's the reason ppl in the acrade made a boogeyman out of turbo and he couldn't come back #like imagine your bf says to you what you are better than others think of you #and then behind your (presumably dead) back tells everyone that you're just an egocentric maniac #i believe turbo has other reasons why he gamejumped (besides jealousy which took place but wasn't the most important reason)#and felix is an unreliable narrator #so yeah turbo HATES his ass #(but still would-) no im not making it suggestive #anyway i hc that turbo had put A LOT of emotions in this relationship even tho he's bad at this #he tried his best with felix but they were just making each other worse #and turbo while feeling betrayed never really moved on (yes even after 25 years he's PATHETIC)#and felix is just full of regret about everything but he won't admit his mistakes in his relationship with turbo #bc “well he turned out to be a bad person so that automatically makes me in the right about everything”#but felix had made a lot of bad decisions while dating turbo and was just classically ignorant about a ton of things #sorry about this random ass essay in tags i'm done for now #wreck it ralph #wir

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bacchuschucklefuck · 7 months ago

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pygmalion and galatea for aroace people

you should tell your friends what I look like, riz gukgak.

#fantasy high #fantasy high sophomore year #fhsy #riz gukgak #baron from the baronies #fh class quangle #class swap babeyy! bard!riz that's whats goin on!#I really need tags for these now I think lmao #ask to tag #I feel like this should be tagged something. but I dont know what #in my brain after the initial kidnapping class swap baron's thing is every time riz keeps his story abt them up in front of his friends #they get a little bit closer. they send him pictures of where they supposedly are n stuff #theres a scene in my brain only of kristen and riz on top of the van and kristen is like everything kinda sucks rn can u tell me abt baron #cause what you guys have is so nice and beautiful. and riz almost doesn't but he ultimately can't deny kristen a little peace #lmao I feel like dipping into baron stuff with the class swap is like showing my whole ass online again I just. I'm a #horror person before all else... I cant stop myself. canon baron is Great and Cool but that is kind of the thing. for a horror thing theyre #Too Cool. I think cool is kind of the neutralizer of scary. when a monster is a certain amount of cool it overrides the scary #and now u just have a Cool Monster #its so fucked for bard!riz this year bc he doesn't have an office (he's mooching off the school wifi from the AV club room lol)#so there's no buffer between adventure and home life. so baron just shows up in the strongtower apartment lmao #sophomore year bard!riz looks like a slasher protag so I just leaned into it I guess. he gets a mr. x if mr. x is made up by leon kennedy #well. its worse actually. they can show up where he is at any moment theyve proven this. but they dont #they choose to punish him slowly as he lies to his friends instead. baron is mr. x if mr. x is made up by leon and also a bitch #I think its gonna pop up if class swap baron ever speaks in a comic I do but their voice comes from like. inside their hollow face #it sounds like it's a lot deeper in there than that skull should be #tbh what I have rn is kinda like a bag of loose pieces that Can fit together into something great but I dont have the energy to #really sit down with them yet lol. Im doing this inbetween other things #it comes or it doesn't! it's fine. funny how today's bad comic day also. I wont say this is for bad comic day bc all my comics are #flawless and beautiful and perfect and awesome and beautiful and the best #but u should. if u havent drawn a comic today or at all ever u should draw a comic

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humbuns · 2 months ago

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when did that start?

#vent art a bit?? or a lot i guess? depending on how you feel about realizing you are burnt out which hm.#i think it's a lot of factors that started it all tbh and i think having a rough year just made everything a little more worse #perhaps i'm just not in the right headspace and consequently it feels like i ran out of juice after 15+ yrs #and my art started to feel ........disposable (which i'm aware it's not but you know how it goes)#this fucking sucks truthfully but i think putting a label to the feeling feels a little better because it's sentient now #and it being real means there's hope of making it (ironically) disposable one day #i will still draw dw but it's just gonna take time i think #didn't expect to be vulnerable on a late Monday night but if you feel like this also you're not alone #anyway i'm just gonna sleep thank u if you made it this far #doodles

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hanzajesthanza · 2 months ago

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it is absolutely so weird to me to try to imagine a version of geralt that is like, my age. like, no. get back to being an old man

#what the heck. my parents were never my age they were just spawned into the world in their 30s #i'm just kidding btw. geralt's not old. vesemir is old. but geralt is my old man #fun fact. for just about forever i thought that 'my old man' meant your father #like 'my old lady' can mean your mother #but 'my old man' actually means your husband or your lover #so when joni mitchell sang big yellow taxi. i totally misinterpreted that for my entire life #i cried to that song because of that #and funnily enough i learned the correct meaning also from her in her blue album #so yeah. i'm going to continually stubbornly use it the way i thought it #but only in contexts where it is obvious i'm talking about it in a father context #quite obviously #anyways. prequel.#young geralt is going to have less but way more worse and recent trauma #after we get this we will have to get regis: the young years where it is like 'dear diary tonight i drank so hard i threw up!'#'can't wait to do it all again tomorrow night and attempt to kill myself five times in a row!'#as i wrote that i also did think of regis re-enacting my favorite drew gooden vine #'dear diary... today i couldn't find my diary so i'm writing this on my two kung fu panda 2 dvds :)'#oh my god. wait. that is literally a philosophy regis shares #'e can easily replace what we don’t have with what we do!'#'it's simply a matter of invention and positive thinking :-)'#the elbow-high diaries #try not to make everything about emiel regis challenge (hard) (failed)

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ursachaotic · 5 months ago

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WHY DID YOU DO IT? 👁 R QFHG DZMGVW GSVN GL FMWVIHGZMW

Haven't done a finished piece in a bit and it's not perfect, but I'm pretty happy with it! But yeah I wanted to make Bill angst except I didn't expect it to actually make me cry lmao 🥲

#gravity falls #bill cipher #human bill cipher #book of bill spoilers #artists on tumblr #fanart #finished work #tw: body horror #for the eye #i originally had him saying 'ma?' because i planned it out as him looking at his mom as the world around him is burning and #seeing her just makes him feel so so so much worse #anyway i'm on the theory train that bill just wanted to be understood after being medicated for years and told to stop talking about #the stars and being bullied and everything #convinced that he was like 'i hAVE TO MAKE THEM SEE I HAVE TO MAKE THEM UNDERSTAND' and it went /horribly/ wrong

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satoruxx · 4 months ago

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it’s been a few hours and i’m still very angry and upset at this ending like wow ofc i’m mad about gojo not coming back but the overall downfall of this series has me baffled…

#[𐐪— jjk spoilers. 𐑂]#like wow why did i invest four years of my life into this just for such a shit ending #like even if gojo had to die #why couldn’t we acknowledge him???#after everything he’s done #and he specifically said he didn’t wanna be forgotten #and that’s what happened #but even aside from gojo #SO MANY PLOT HOLES #like wdym you’re gonna tease kenjaku/suguru and then never elaborate????#we don’t even know which one it was #and then why is there still one sukuna finger???#what was the whole point of the story #we went back to the beginning???#i’m so confused #and never talking about megumi’s full potential like gojo was talking about early on #ugh there’s so much #i’m sad bc i didn’t get satoru back #but i think it’s worse that the ending of my literal favorite series could end up so horrible #idk #i’m very tired #jjk spoilers #jjk 271 #jjk leaks

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opens-up-4-nobody · 6 months ago

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...

#i never really thought about a person being a finite thing. you can see the effects of a person after they die. in the unfinished projects.#in the rooms of clutter. in abandoned closets. in pictures and in mermered phrases. and you can see time #chipping away at those things. eroding away the evidance that a person existed. clothes move into other people's closets. projects are boxed #away. and a person becomes confined to photos and memories. and thats existentially terrifying but its not a bad thing. time erodes away all #things. that's how life works. matter and energy transforms.#we arent made to last forever. i dunno. i guess im still just rattled from being home even tho ive been back a week and a half.#and my brain tends to fixate on the wrong things. nearly 27 years of knowing someone eclipsed by a visual sequence lasting less than a day.#bc i just cant get over how scary it would be to die like that. to start losing control of your body. to not be able to feed yourself or get #to the bathroom. to have your mind be overcome by the toxins building up in your mangled and broken body.#and it could have been worse. it could have been a lot worse. but its still not fair. theres no good way to die. i dunno. i guess i just #miss my mom in some abstract way but i find it more viscerally upsetting to think about the people that have to deal with her absence.#it makes me sad that my dad is alone now. i dunno. grief doesnt feel like i thought it would. most of the time i dont even know what im #crying about. its undirected. it doesnt feel like: i miss you. it feels like: youre gone. how can you be gone? why does everything feel the #same? and its not that it doesnt make sense. its that nothings changed. the terror of that.#and im walking around in an acumulation of my dead mother's clothes. and no one knows. theyll never know.#and there's nothing to be done about it. so it goes.#i guess im just sad. and its hard to breathe at the thought of returning to school at the end of August.#unrelated

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ohsweetflips · 13 hours ago

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somewhere on this blog there is a post that goes something like "what if i just start identifying as nonbinary and don't tell anyone and still go by she/her" and that needs to be marked as the day that pandora's box opened

#ik it's my blog etc etc etc but i do try to not sad post often anymore just bc after a while #it becomes a lot akjdsjkdjk #however. this is also the closest i have to an unfiltered diary. so!#idk man ik (im pretty sure) rapid onset dysphoria is a thing or something but like #edit: the most rudimentary of google searches show that this may or may not actually be what i mean but like. 20% effort went into that #the magnitude of bad i have felt in the past week is kinda wild to me #like ive been feeling stuff softly like that for a while now w/ an increase come september #for like. reasons that ik but also reasons that dont necessarily matter rn #but it's like. less a realization and more so steps of becoming more comfortable/feeling more secure #but in that security i essentially run into a brick wall #like i joke abt whatever post i made years ago but it's like #lowk this feels like what i was worried abt this happening LMAO #like this idea of things kinda actualizing in my mind for me #but the actual capability of what i can do feeling limited #like. i have no clue what transitioning would/could necessarily look like for me #but it's starting to feel very much like: whatever it is won't happen #which ik is like. bad queer mindset 1 #and then i am falling to bad queer mindset 2 of like. feeling bad that this took so long #and that i didnt put together stuff. or try more. earlier.#and that i've now like. run out of time. which ik is not true so like.#the self-awareness is here! i'm also just stubborn lmao #and like idk currently i'm just in the hell of not wanting to do the middle stuff #i just want to wake up one morning and be different AKJDFKJFDKJFD #anyways! i swear im not actively trying to spiral like every day this week #just my mental constitution is weak and susceptible to demons. and also anxiety and sadness LMAO #and as me and my roommate say. it's never too early for the guilt spiral.#also the pandora's box technically opened when i was like 15 but.#we put a lid on that and then everything came back worse when i was like. idk 19/20.

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jimmyspades · 9 months ago

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#that first gif... he is deadly #james spader #alan shore #boston legal #*#favorite #there's a full-length shot in this scene where you can see his belly. stretching the fabric of his shirt just above his waistband. ougghhh #trying to focus on how sexy this is but this episode was so. soft and suffering alan #once again everyone expects the worse from him. they ASK it of him for their own benefit #and he doesn't disappoint. he is the worst and he loses his temper and finds himself on the ledge again #when he storms out of denny's office so mad he can't even look at him. went home alone and furious and upset #drank himself to sleep for the first time in months if not years bc after a good run it feels like things are falling apart again #the way they always do. because that's what alan shore deserves #he thought it might be different this time. he thought well my parents didn't care about me. my wife died. I got fired. everyone leaves #maybe this time will be different. but now he's in the hotel room where he lives. without his best friend. about to be disbarred. stupid.#this was always going to happen because he doesn't deserve any better. they were all right about him. they were right to run away #everything is fixed the next day he and denny go on a field trip 🤠 but GD!!!!!#alaaaaannnnnnn 😭

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funkbun · 13 days ago

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if i start thinking about Hector too hard they start beating me over the head with every weapon on earth ever

#👆 guy who finally realized what the hell 'The Drain' thing everyone talks about is like 2 seconds ago. im in pain bro #it applies to basically all the bizzyboys but im focusing on hector specifically because i like imagining him suffering the most #he also makes Me suffer the most. i hate him heart emoji #thinking about his life there pre-godhood but ALSO what'll be like for him post-godhood #i dont think any of the bizzyboys would go back to The Drain to live there since it might just remind them of how lonely and worse(er) -#their lives were before following inspekta #but like. imagine hector visiting there after everything that's happened. imagine.#probably feeling as though he failed everyone there. that he didn't make any Meaningful change to the world. he almost destroyed it all -#and now after 33 years he's back to square one. all that work for nothing #(or at least that's what he himself Believes is true)#just aaaugh aauuuuugggh arrroouuugggh #ggg spoilers #god game #the bizzyboys are a buncha hellboys...#i didn't even bring up capochin here oh my god if i do i'll Die i'll Die right here right now they'll Kill me

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girlivealwaysbean · 3 months ago

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i think growing up is just life repeatedly sucker punching you and saying bitch you thought things were gonna better lmao no you're so naive and stupid for having hope in 20 years the world will be flaming bag of garbage and no matter how hard you work you'll get eliminated at some point