#everything has just been a lot lately lol
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。☆TTYL XOXO。.゚+
。☆Tim Drake headcanons + SMAU
。☆Cw: no pronouns, no use of y/n, mention of stalking, civilian reader
˗ˏ★First of all, he's a shit typer. He's typing while barely looking at the screen most of the time, but muscle memory allows his typing to still be mostly coherent
˗ˏ★What he chooses to abbreviate or to actually spell out is in God's hands, he definitely isn't thinking about word choice
˗ˏ★Also a lot more blunt over text. Most of the time he's in the middle of something and lowk rushing to reply (╥﹏╥)
˗ˏ★Sends memes and tiktoks all the time. It's his love language 🩷🩷
˗ˏ★Such a "this is us" "is this us" "this reminds me of us" type of guy lol. It can be two balls of trash rolling down the street and he'll be like "me n u on a walk<33"
˗ˏ★He loves when you send stuff like that back. It makes him feel all warm inside
˗ˏ★Only says I love you over text. He's working on it, but the only person he knows that casually says ily is Dink
˗ˏ★A huge workaholic, whether we're talking about WE or vigilante activities. His work/life balance is almost as bad as Bruce's
˗ˏ★Denies his weird and obsessive habits for plausible deniability lmao
˗ˏ★Sneaks into your house with dubious consent, but he (almost) always tells you when he's done it
˗ˏ★Always up late bc of his vigilante activities so finding lovey dovey texts sent to you between like 3-6am is pretty regular
˗ˏ★Will NOT acknowledge them in person tho. That's way too vulnerable for him, and the reason you only ever get those texts when his inhibitions are lowered
˗ˏ★Accidentally cropped the last one wrong but you get the gist so it's fine ( ╹▽╹ )
˗ˏ★I'm a Tim doesn't like coffee truther soooo....
˗ˏ★Constantly texting you during boring WE meetings. He doesn't even hide it either. The other rich guys there will be like "Mr.Drake-Wayne sir?? 😟☝🏾 Is everything okay you've been on your phone this whole time😕!" And he'll be like "yeah everything's fine thanks😐" without even looking up
˗ˏ★You don't know he does this fyi, you just assume he has a lot of free time since he's CEO
I did nawt think this was gonna be the first Batfam thing I posted, I have a bunch more in my drafts, but here we are lol. Come hop into my askbox, I don't bite /ᐠ。ꞈ。ᐟ\
。☆Requests open
#˗ˏˋ ★ venus writes ★ ˎˊ˗#tim drake x reader#tim drake x you#tim drake x male reader#tim drake x fem!reader#tim drake x y/n#nonbinary reader#gender neutral reader#gender neutral y/n#tim x reader#dc smau#batman smau#tim drake smau#batfam smau#˗ˏˋ ★ batfam ★ ˎˊ˗
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Self Care is Important, Spudling (Vil Schoenheit x Reader)
Gender neutral reader, referred to as Y/N, Prefect, Potato, or Spudling (a lot with Vil, lol)
Warnings!:
Stressed Reader
Passing out
Lack of self care; Reader
Small mental breakdown; Reader
Word Count:
Approximately 2.58k
Of course- of course Crowley had to assign you maintenance work on campus...again. I mean was this guy serious? Fixing up some architecture, whether that be painting or patching up small holes, then you had to fix up the flower beds, make them look presentable and pretty! Better points for the college, Crowley says. Sadly, however, you’re not done yet, because you have to go help out with a few clubs and observe them since you haven’t, and well, kind of can’t join one yourself, this again was to earn your keep as a student, Crowley says. Then of course, there’s the never ending supply of homework from Professor Trein and Crewel, which you have still yet to do since you’ve been so choked up with everything else Crowley dumps onto you on a daily basis. All for you to earn your keep in Ramshackle, all for you to earn your keep of you and Grim being considered students. And all for you to earn your keep of just barely even living!
It’s tiring, a cumbersome array of tasks on your list that only seems to get longer and longer each day. You get to bed late, and then you have to get up at 6, get yourself ready, get Grim ready, make breakfast, take the hike up to school, and the cycle repeats. You’re tired. You’re oh so tired…
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You sit in class, your head bobbing slightly as you try and force your eyes open. You shake your head and rub your eyes, an action that has become the norm for you the past few days. You fight back multiple yawns as Trein finds it to be a disrespectful act in his classroom for some odd reason, though it’s his fault his lessons are so boring. You sigh and you look down at your paper, the words jumbled up to your mind and incomprehensible. Grim scribbles away at his assignment and he does a double take as he looks at you, tapping your forehead with his paw and gets you to look at him.
“Ya look like you’re dying.” He whispers as he crosses his paws, his face graced with an apprehensive look. He lets out a small puff of air and he narrows his eyes at you.
“Feels like it.” You take the time to rub your temples this time and stretch something out, anything to keep you awake at this point.
Luckily for you, the bell tolls and everyone shoots up from their seats, taking their books and papers and getting the hell out of the classroom to escape from the quiet lul of that annoying monotone voice of Trein. You stand up yourself, groggy and a little disheveled as you finally yawn and walk out with Grim.
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Coach Vargas has you all doing a whole bunch of workouts. First it was sit ups, then push ups, step ups on the bleachers, lunges, and now you have to run figure eights out on the field. Grim cheats and floats as usual (wtf man…) and you run alongside the other students, already out of breath.
Of course your mind wanders off to the assignments, reviewing over the items at hand. Trein’s history essay is due tomorrow in class and you haven’t started it yet, so there’s that. You also have to do a write up on the one lab in alchemy for Crewel— woah…
Your vision goes a bit blurry, you stumble a bit as you slow down, your body suddenly giving up on itself and practically going slack. Then you fall face first into the ground, passing out, and going limp, resembling closely to a sack of potatoes.
Students suddenly stop and look at you as you lay upon the ground. Coach Vargas yells for them to get back to work until he also takes sight of you. Well shit.
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Your head pounds and throbs as you finally come back to your senses, you flutter your eyes open slowly but the bright cool white color of the fluorescent lights prohibits you from opening your eyes anymore than just a squint. You try to sit up but your body feels it’s being weighed down by tons and tons of lead.
Grim pops up and he seems to be saying something but the words just sound like a cacophony of vowels as you slowly come back to the state of consciousness.
“Henchhuman! Henchhuman! What happened? You like…died! Don’t do that again!” He pouts at you, clearly worried as he gently paws at your arm. A nurse walks in and assesses you, giving you some sort of potion that tastes like strong rosemary and a hint of garlic, then sends you on your way.
“You were out for like an hour and a half, and everyone in class saw ya just fall right over! Ace created a big scene! And, not just that, Vargas princess carried you out! Bridal style or whatever they call it. It’s gonna be the talk of the school soon, no doubt.” Grim huffs and puffs, shaking his head and heavily gesticulating to further prove his point of concern.
“I’m just tired, Grim. Severely tired, stressed, all of the above.” You sigh, shaking your head. You rub your temples and continue to walk forwards.
“Clearly. I gotta tell Crowley off or something! He’s slowly burning you out...only I can do that since you're my henchman…” He murmurs “You need to take a break. A nice break.” He looks at you and smirks.
“Grim, what are you implying?” You narrow your eyes at him and cross your arms, halting.
“You’ll see, Hemchuman!” He chortles.
“Grimmy, I-“
He zooms past you and makes his way to the mirror chamber within the school. Your head still hurts but you can let him go off and cause trouble on his own, which he will do!
By the time you get to the mirror chamber, praying that Grim didn’t head to a dorm where even breathing wrong could be destructive, you can see the mirror to Pomefiore still rippling. You pause and your eye twitches, fucking hell, he did not.
You head through. What happened to him saying you needed a break?
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When you get through the mirror, Grim is still nowhere in sight, which only means he’s inside of the building. Great! One thing after another it seems.
You head into the castle-like place and walk through the ornate and sparkly hallways, passing by students who pause and go quiet at your appearance, which is tired, hungry, and pissed the fuck off due to the shenanigans Grim is pulling currently at the moment.
As you finally push into the lounge, Grim is yapping to Vil, Grims eyes contorted into a look of worry and his face holding a small amount of smugness to it. Vil does a double take when looking at you, and as soon as you lock eyes with him, he looks you up and down, his eyes going a little wide as if he had just seen his makeup pallet get destroyed. A prominent frown envelopes his features, replacing his once stoic and demure demeanor.
“Spudling…” is all he sighs out. The disappointment in his voice is enough alone to make you hold back any complaints you had to tell to Grim.
You’re irked, and your shoulders tense as you look away bashfully. You look at Grim who floats next to Vil, his chin held high as he smiles like he’s won all the tuna he could ever ask for.
“Eyes on me.” His stern voice reaches your ears and you look back at him, your lips pursed and your hands now behind your back, standing at attention.
“Look at you…” he sighs again as he walks over to you, his eyes narrowed and unwavering as he inspects you carefully, most likely pinpointing everything wrong with you.
“Rook relayed the information to me as to what happened during PE. I would have found you myself if not for Grim leading you here. At least he’s useful for that.” He clicks his tongue, a regular action for him to make while disapproving of something.
“Truly, what makes you think what you’ve been doing is any good?” He crosses his arms and shifts his weight to one leg as he waits for a response.
“I. Well. You just- I don’t think you’d really understand, Vil, if I can be honest.” You shake your head. “I have to do it. To stay here, you know? So, it’s whatever. I’m fine, I promise. Didn’t get a lot of sleep last night and that’s it-“
“Don’t play coy. Anyone can see that you’ve been disregarding your own body’s needs for more than just a night, and sleep is not the only thing you seem to be lacking.”
His words cause you to bristle up, your muscles close to cramping at how tense you’ve become. He looks at you still with a frown and the unamused tone in his voice is…unnerving.
“Ok, well, it’s things I need to get done-“
“I won’t sit here and listen to your feigning utterance.” Vil sighs, yet again, uncrossing his arms and moving to place a hand on your shoulder. In contrast to his demeanor, his touch is soft yet grounding. You visibly relax and you sigh out a soft breath.
“I’ll have Rook see Grim to Heartslabyul, you’re not leaving until I deem you fit to go on your way.” He hums as his hand slides to your upper back, silently and slowly ushering you to follow behind him. His heels click on the ground as you're already halfway down the hall, just now realizing what his words imply for you.
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It’s true Vil took a liking to you, but he’d never admit that, his ego could be damaged, and he prefers to show that he cares through actions, anyhow, being a strong believer in that they speak louder than words.
As soon as you both reach Vil’s dorm room, he has you sit down at his vanity, gently spinning the seat so you’re face-to-face with yourself in the mirror.
“Your eyebags are so dark, and your eyes are sunken in, as well. Your hair also happens to be dry in appearance and texture. Are you eating? I’d hope so, because there is no way to take care of your body by skipping meals.” He rants on as his hands gently work to slip off your blazer, slipping it off of you and draping it over the chair.
“I forgot to eat.” You lie. A white lie. You weren’t that far off from the truth, skipping meals was necessary in your case, money was low and Grim needed to eat more than you, a sacrifice you were willing to make.
Vil pauses, his hands resting on the back of the chair as he looks at you through the mirror. If he kept frowning at you like that he’d get wrinkles, then blame you.
“Pitiful excuse, potato.” He clicks his tongue. “I hope you realize that you don’t have to lie to me.” He shakes his head.
“Wait, Vil, how the hell did you even…I’m not gonna ask.” You cross your arms.
“You’re easy to read, Prefect. You’re not as imperceptible as you may make yourself out to be” He huffs out.
“Lay it on me. It’s good to vent, Potato. It’s quite beneficial, especially to those who have a lot on their mind. It provides an escape.” His voice dips a little lower, becoming softer. You look at him through the mirror again and you see his facial features severely lacking that contemptuous look he always has, and instead it’s replaced with a soft, almost empathetic look.
“I…” is what you can manage to croak out for a second before you clear your throat and look down at your hands in your lap, leaning back in the chair.
“I guess, well. Crowley, you know him. I just have been busy with the work he’s given me, and also the assignments I have to do. Money is tight as always…I have to be careful with what I or Grim buys, so…” you slowly stammer out, the frustration and tiredness in your voice evident.
“I’m just stressed out. Tired, which I guess that’s clear to anyone, though.” Your voice quivers slightly, and before you even know it tears fall down your face, a sentiment to your situation.
You don’t hear any reprimanding from Vil, no sighs or clicks of tongues as you keep your head down, no, none of that. Vil gently moves off to the side of the chair and turns you to face him, gently dabbing at the tears that cascade down your cheeks with a tissue.
“I’m sorry…” you manage to mutter out weakly.
“Nonsense. It’s normal, sweet potato.” He gently murmurs back, his voice mellifluous and calming, anchoring you back to the moment. You take the tissue from his hand and you turn your head away.
“If it makes you feel better, I too, cry. There’s a science behind it in which it releases chemicals to promote a sense of well being.” He hums. “As well as eases pain.”
“I would have never guessed.” You sigh out, albeit sarcastically, now dabbing at your nose.
“Sarcasm? I see you're slowly reviving.” A small smirk forms on his face as he shakes his head.
“I think we have a self care night set in place for us, what do you say?” He inquires.
You hesitate for a moment but you meet his questions with a small nod, earning a genuine and gentle smile from Vil.
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You are pampered, of course. It’s only natural. Vil goes to any extent for the people he holds dear, and you were in need of a night of relaxation. You are fed well with a nutrient dense meal to hopefully make up for your lack of care for your eating habits, and now there’s more in store…
After a few strenuous minutes of following his lengthy skincare routine, you both sit clad in silk robes that are probably worth more money than you could ever make in your life, but the moment is still peaceful. And even more to your surprise, you sit with Vil in his raw form. No makeup, no demeanor that yells “I’m the Vil Schoenheit,” no, just Vil.
He hums quietly as he deliberately shapes your nails, not sparing you a glance as he’s too focused at the task at hand. The calmness of the atmosphere is doing no help in keeping you awake and alert and you soon find your eyes start to grow heavy.
Vil quietly excuses himself to head over to grab a bottle of clear coat for your nails, but before you know it, you fall back onto the comfy bed sheets of his bed, perfume and other scents sending you into a deep sleep before you could even stop yourself from doing so.
“Y/N, would you like color or just the clear coat-“ He looks at you, shutting up immediately as his arms fall to his side. His footsteps are light as he shuffles over to the side of his bed, looking down at you. He sighs and shakes his head.
he moves the comforter over your body, bringing it up to your shoulders. He leans down slowly and places a tentative and soft kiss to your temple before leaning back up.
“This is why self care is important, spudling. I’ll let this slide…just once.”
I don’t know what I was on when I wrote this, but yep, that’s it. Thanks for reading lovelies!
Annnndddd, requests and asks are open!!! ପ(๑•ᴗ•๑)ଓ just be sure to read the rules before sending in a request!
Master list
Please don’t steal or copy any of my work! You may, however, reblog if you’d want to!
Pictures belong to Disney Twisted Wonderland but are edited by me :)
#twisted wonderland#disney twst#disney twisted wonderland#vil schoenheit#twst vil#vil shoenheit x reader#pomefiore#vil schoenheit x you#comfort#overworked#x reader#x you#cute#twst prefect#x y/n#y/n#prefect#spudling#sweet potato#<3#Vil Schoenheit Disney Twisted Wonderland
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alright, im going to try to get some work done finally
#everything has just been a lot lately lol#dont post about personal shit often but like#i can only say “sorry for not updating. my mom died and im depressed.” so many times#in response to constant comments of ummmmm this pack is broken because im playing on a new version that it wasn't designed for.
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hope everyone is having is having a great week so far! 🥹✨
#sorry i havent been on much! life’s just a lil busy!#im too shy to put it in a post but everything with my masters has been settled 🥺#i got accepted into the school i wanted and just got my student visa granted the other day 🥺#(idk if i ever mentioned that i plan to study abroad for my masters! specifically where mr. sel is 🥺)#so i am slated to leave early next year 🥹 and i’ll be staying w mr. sel 🥺🥺🥺🥺#ldr is truly over !!!!!! 🥺🥺🥺#that is all auosnzidnjd so life lately has just been absorbing that and fixing things for the move!#along w spending time w him while he’s here 🥹#i was honestly considering going on semi hiatus 😭 but i still read a lot of fics anyway so… HAHAHA#i might take a lil writing break tho not sure 🥺 maybe just put less pressure on myself to post?#i feel really bad that i havent given attention to the fics of mine that i keep talking abt 😭 like all the series i have#and i wanna get back into reading a looooot 🥺 esp longer stuff 🥺 so lets see!#anyway ! how are all of youuuu!!!#i am currently rewatching a mingyu fancam LOL
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I can't believe I have to spell it out but if you really really want to repost something you saw on tumblr to some other platform please credit the original creator??? And no, "credit to the owner" does NOT count 🙄🙃
#asking to not repost at all or even not miscaption things would be probably too much lol but at least credit people???#I thought it was obvious but apparently not???#I'm blocking everyone I saw doing it with my stuff but they still find a way somehow???#I know I should probably sign everything but I can't be bothered + have too many unsigned things to start doing it out of nowhere +#+ don't think most of them are That Good lol#but I still spend my own time on things even if they are silly and simple and unoriginal??? they don't materialise out of thin air???#like I don't want to sound like an arrogant bitch; fandom is just a hobby that distracts me from The Horrors -#- but stumbling upon something I made without a link to my tumblr or my username mentioned is upsetting#especially if it's done by a fandom old or whatever it's called🙄#sorry I don't want to be an anonymous content provider for your 1300 stupid twitter followers 🙃🙃🙃#I whine a lot lately don't I#but like why can't they even steal a gifset properly and have to make an ugly screenshot of it instead😭#oh and while I'm at it - attaching fics as files to download without a link to ao3 (or even the author's name) is not ok either imo ://#this most likely won't reach the intended audience BUT STILL#maybe I'm overreacting but it has been annoying me for a while now -#- and seeing A SCREENSHOT of my gifset in the wild without my name posted by someone who I was SURE I blocked was the last straw I guess 🙃
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#just a little mental health check in mostly for myself just to write it down#I'm in a weird place#in some regards I've been doing really well lately#I've been more social which always does wonders for my mental health#on the other hand a couple weeks ago I was home alone for a couple days and I was so stir crazy I almost couldn't handle it#I've actually been happy with my body for the last few months and I haven't had any anxiety about food nor have I attempted any restrictions#that's been a big bonus#I'm having a lot of trouble with decisions lately. I'm second guessing everything to a stressing degree#I feel like a bad person for reasons I can't totally pinpoint. like I think I'm manipulating everyone but to what end I can't tell#and there's a part of me that knows this is irrational but I can't shake it#it's so weird being aware that I'm doing so well in many regards#but I'm also able to feel myself slipping into types of paranoia that I know I'm suseptible to#today's been better but for the last few days my heart rate has been noticeably high (which says a lot because it is generally high)#it's caused unease#I don't know if I really have a point to typing any of this out#I'm feeling fine overall. I'm happy with my life right now. I have plenty of things to look forward to in the near and further future#I can just tell something is a little off and I think it might be beneficial to my future self to write this out for sake of timeline#I really need to start tracking my period because it totally might be that. or you know. I have OCD and anxiety is just a part of my life#who knows. it could be a mix or nothing or everything#I don't think anyone's reading this whole thing lol but if anyone does I do want to leave the reassurance that I'm fine and I'll be fine#like I said. just keeping an eye on myself.#oh I thought of another positive thing! I've been way less freaked out about chemicals lately! that's a nice note to end this on!#ashley rambles
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Well.
#(I'm back)#It was. Uhm. A chapter#First of all: I'm ENDLESSLY GRATEFUL to the person who sent me the translation basically as soon as the chapter came out.#I even did like 90% of typesetting but didn't finish it because I had to go out#(aka with my friends were literally knocking out at my room and I couldn't make it any more late lol)#Mixed feelings about it? Mostly because there's so much exposition... I'll need to reread it another three times before it sinks in#The color page is AMAZING 10000000000000/10 I love my sskks so much they're so cute I love them so much they're so cute.#Easily the best part of the chapter.#The color page was? Very very pretty too? Like a lot more than usual if you ask me! I can't wait for the volume cover 🥺🥺#It should come out soon shouldn't it? Usually color spreads / pages open the volume...#Akutagawa fake dying again is funny. Like it isssss but also. Idk it's a little lame how we're changing the pov from ss/kk again :/#I can't even tell if I'm being biased or if it's an actual storytelling critique. I don't care right now I just want to see Akutagawa–#being cool rather than. You know. Dead on the ground.#That said! It's also very funny and touches my sense of humor precisely.#Like yeah Akutagawa being like the second strongest pm member and overall one of the most powerful ability user in the world–#that everyone fears (and I know he is! He is indeed for real!)#And yet he always ends up face to the ground 😂😂😂 Like if we don't count the ss/kk fights he literally only ever won against Hawthorne.#And even then he failed to kill him and Mitchell. It's so funny to me. I love him. He's so pathetic#“Wow! Akutagawa is so cool and invincible now!” *ends up biting the dust not even two chapters later*#It's okay because I love him. He's very very powerful and he's also very very pathetic I love that for him#That said :/ I don't really care about Fukuzawa :/ Idk :/ Like :/#Don't get me wrong I LOVE Fukuzawa (I don't. I'm mostly neutral towards him) but this is the ss/kk moment man :/ Whatchu doin#That's about it. Let's see what the next chapter brings!#Everything accounted for I'm glad there wasn't like. A ss/kk kiss or any other big big ss/kk moment#(although Atsushi admiring Akutagawa and thinking about his eyes has its fair share of neatness to it!!)#Because with everything going on this evening I really would have been let down to miss it#But I keep hope for the next chapters!! Please...#random rambles#Had tons of fun typesetting! Even though I don't think there's a point in posting it now. But would love to do it again in the future!#bsd spoilers
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Some attempts at a design for Selena :3. The second image is inspired by the wedding in Haunted Castle, but I changed Simon’s outfit cause idk I just can’t picture him being comfortable in a suit.
The last two of these are way more headcanon-y lol. They’re under a cut mostly in case my headcanons and story ideas change d(^^ ). One of them was inspired by a Kikuo song I was listening to while drawing lol, the song “Let’s Go to Heaven”.
#castlevania#castlevania games#selena belmont#castlevania selena#castlevania ii#castlevania 2#castlevania simon’s quest#simon’s quest#castlevania ii: simon's quest#haunted castle#simon belmont#akumajou dracula#akumajo dracula#art post#my art#I remember seeing someone make a post somewhere about how it was weird that#a lot of the cut items from the first Castlevania were things like high heels and a love letter and stuff#I wonder if Simon’s wife/girlfriend was supposed to be a character at one point in it and she got cut for some reason#idk it’s interesting to me that she’s only ever appeared in like deliberately noncanon content ya know?#like Haunted Castle was even called not a Castlevania game by its own lead director#the two novels with Simon girlfriends in them were never intended to be canon just fun side stuff#especially the ones that were choose your own adventure books lol I love the art style in one of those#anyway I’ve been trying to think of ways to write her lately but its so easy to end up accidentally falling into annoying tropes alas 💀💀💀#especially ones the series has already used before oof#currently my idea so far is since Simon himself is kinda the chosen one hero guy trope in CV1#and ends up subverting that trope by genuinely failing a ton getting hated by the public and possibly dying at the end#maybe Selena might work as initially the damsel in distress and call to action trope and subverts that later????#I also have always thought she ends up the Mysterious Woman somehow hmmmm#it’s a hard headcanon to incorporate without just pulling a Dracula X chronicles and oh no she’s a vampire aaaaa but that’s been done 💀#I am also aware that not everything you write has to be 100% completely new and original and perfect but aaaaaaa
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Heya! Saw your cry for a distraction and honestly such a mood.
I've got a question!
What's your least favorite thing to draw/do when you make art?
I'm on my own art journey right now and kind of dread the transition from lineart to coloring.
Trying to study anatomy right now and ignore rendering but I'm curious what other artists feel is challenging or just like 'ugh, ok time for [x]'
OHHH in terms of what's challenging, for me it's definitely coloring, rendering, backgrounds, and composition HAHA (<- chronic flat colors user who only draws character art on a floating white background)
i love focusing on gesture and lines when i draw ^_^ i rely mostly on intuition for the other stuff but it really only takes u so far T_T i'll spend hours trying to fix something by trial and error when i probably couldve saved that time by putting in more conscious studying/practice lol
#the thing that keeps me from getting too down about it tho is that it just takes some dedicated time and practice!!!#one of my goals this year is to take a class on one of those things!! or read a book on it or smth lol#for me i like learning the theory behind those things. makes things click and saves me a lot of time and frustration down the road lol#just the other day i was working on smth and the colors took me FOREVERRRR to figure out T_T#it's like. i kinda knew why the colors didnt work together but i didn't know how to pick the right ones to fix it.#it's nice to have tools to fall back on when you get stuck/intuition fails you#BUT!! everyone is different#the important thing is to not get too hung up on the things you are weak in ^_^ it's only temporary as long as ur patient and practice!!#i think its hilarious how u put it tho 'ugh ok time for' BC IT RLY DO FEEL LIKE THAT SOMETIMES DKJFHASF#me when i finish my sketch/lines. ugh now time for everything else BAHAHA#ALSO SORRY I REPLIED SO LATE this has been sitting in drafts for a while and i forgot to finish writing my response omfg
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i feel like there is so much to be said about drizzt do’urden’s religious views and how he’s a stand-in for culturally christian atheists. he grew up in a corrupt religious society and has religious trauma, so as a result he views all religion as bad. at first it seems like he’s going to have a “pagan finds jesus” story but he eventually rejects mielikki too, and imo, it always felt out of character that he followed her in the first place so i wasn’t surprised when he changed his mind. he was looking for a name to label his preexisting system of ideals, which feels very much like christians who claim “all that matters is that you live by the bible and live in a godly manner”. many religions are about teachings and traditions as much as they are about “just being a good person and following god’s vibes” (which i feel like is INCREDIBLY standard in american protestantism)
i think a lot of it comes down to the fact that the forgotten realms (and a lot of fantasy tbh) treats the gods as just Very Powerful People instead of the forces of nature personified (and again this is to be expected from a christian culture, where jesus was Just A Guy)
#ik i don’t really post about dnd lore bc most of it sucks ass and i prefer to ignore it lmao#only a very large sum of money could get me to reread those books tho lmao#it’s to be expected that they would apply morality to the gods when dnd has a morality system yk#it doesn’t work imo. but the way they approach religion feels like it was written by someone who is not religious and doesn’t rly understand#it’s the latent catholicism talking but religions aren’t synonymous with moral systems#it’s ethical guidance for sure but more than that#it’s belief AND practice AND also faith that you can’t know everything#the latter is kind of off the table in a world where the gods tangibly exist bc then it just becomes#‘the king is so powerful and better than you and has many secrets that he keeps for your protection’#in this type of religious system it makes all clerics seem like sycophants or fools#and yet we also have drizzt who says the gods and their worship are pointless#(which is why i never really bought that he was bought into mielikki)#if you want to make a criticism about systems of power. most fantasy still has kings and queens#been thinkin about drizzt and the drow a lot lately after one of my side moots and i were talking lol#and just how. utterly garbage the official lore is. from all aspects#mine#dnd
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feeling nostalgic and watching utube reactors discover classic songs and then feeling both old and incredulous
#1980s music#like someone watching blondie's rapture and then stopping to go 'oh it reminds me of something it's so familiar'#different people (all younger) do this all the time and it can be infuriating#like it's an older song - did it ever occur to you that maybe what you're thinking of ... took inspiration from THIS song????#although in that case it was rather grandmaster flash and the nyc rap scene bc of course that's what the song was referencing#it's the boss baby meme but in music form#and i know i'm guikty of it too but at least in the correct direction - looking back to things that came before#not being aghast that a beat they've heard s thousand times was sampled from an old song that copied an older song lol#i will say that it is SO weird to me that peopke who say they are into hiphop never seem to reference the rap from my youth#like the late 70s and 80s sound that everything after is built on#and it's not like i know a lot about it beyond watching yo mtv raps at night lol#but i had to watch kids struggle to recognize the warren g regulate sample from michael mcdonald#like SO much of the early sampling era was just tons of samples of old records - anything they didn't have to pay for#and then listening to things and going oh this sounds like the weeknd - bro the weekend sounds like 80s songs#he sings and structures the songs in similar ways to classic tracks rather than the current trend (sometimes)#gah i'm just ranting here rather than in some poor utubers comments#i wish i had some fellow old folks to jabber with#but even when i was in high school i didn't have any friends that liked the same kind of music as i did#bts getting me more interested in music and watching videos has really been a double-edged sword sigh#everything with a live studio band with bass in it: 'oh this sounds like disco'#or worse something literally built off a disco sample and it's like they've never heard a disco song other than ymca in their life
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I love my gx winx au and I love that it's just bits and pieces of me being like oh that's fun and not having any semblance of lore or plot. It's purely contained to the character designs I've drawn for the girls.
#it will stay contained to art too it's not something I'd ever write#like I know absolutely nothing about this au of mine but I'm obsessed with it all the same#like I learn something new about it every time I've drawn something#I don't draw a lot for it yall have seen everything I've done and it's usually just a drawing of alexis cuz I love her design lol#but like I'm doing panels for it rn right? and like it's just coming together like the story of what's happening atm#and that's like the only story there actually is rn but it's just falling into place#so I can actually make something of substamce out of this tiny concept I had for a drawing I wanted to try because I had an itch and it grew#that doesn't really happen to me anymore like I haven't felt a spark like that since I wrote OUAD#nothing I've written since has felt the same#and like I said this isn't something I would write into a fic or anything it would just be too much but it's really everything to me rn#something I can come back to and dip my toe in whenever I really feel like I need a spark again and it just makes me happy#I grew up with 4kids winx club so another reason I'd never write anything for real is because I refuse to watch any other version#like I've tried I just can't do it my mind rejects any other version so I only know the universe to a point anyway and but that was my thin#it made me so happy as a kid and it still does now like those are my girls and they mean the world to me and being able to play#within that space with other characters I'm obsessed with and combine into something that miraculously works is amazing#I need to draw more stuff for this au I guess is my whole point#I need to see what other things can..... bloom....... (heh) within that space and what will just manifest before me#I need that something to make me feel that spark again because I don't want to lose it forever and I think I'm starting to find it again#life has just been knocking down over and over lately and it's destroyed so much of my mental state and honestly randomly deciding to try#and actually draw actual stuff for this au has been so healing. I almost feel lighter#it feels stupid amd silly to say but it's true#abby's just rambling don't mind her
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cant sleep because im seething with anger
#been laying here for like 40 minutes fantasizing about finally snapping and telling my mom everything i really think and feel#if i ever came out to her she would end up cutting me off like she did to my aunts and uncles and cousins#basically im alone and my parents and siblings are the only family i can be in contact with right now and its isolating#off topic but yeah#i miss having a big family and people besides my parents that i could rely on. people i felt like i could actually breathe around#idk. whatever#why do i feel responsible for her actions all the time. its been my job to keep her stable and listen to her vent for years#but i never say anything about my own feelings. because she would make me feel stupid and ridicule me. lol#all she does is make me feel like shit most of the time. shes always in a bad mood and shes always whining and always pessimistic#and yeah i get along with her for the most part but lately her attitude has been weighing on me a lot. i cant criticize or disagree with her#because she'll just get mad. shes always been an angry person. thats why i hardly spoke to her from ages 10-15#maybe i jsut wanted to give her another chance. maybe i felt sympathy for her. shes had it rough her whole life#but when shes still bitter no matter how many times i comfort her and let her vent and cry to me and when she chooses her husband over me#every single time he fucks up (which is like. constantly) and always takes his side when they inevitably make up after a huge fight#it feels like i'll never be able to make her happy. it feels like i should stop trying. if she wants to be full of hatred#and have a shitty husband then fine. i cant fix her like and i cant hold the weight of her mistakes#*life
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Your Weekly TV Guide
On Monday you can expect:
2:30 PM: Just Desserts - Villainsona
And Tuesday:
2:30 PM: Star Control II
Wednesday:
2:30 PM: The Sims 2 - SCII
Thursday:
2:30 PM: SCII
Friday:
2:30 PM: Handplates
Saturday:
2:30 PM: The Sims 2 - Handplates
Sunday:
2:30 PM: To the Moon - Rosawatts
Thanks for tuning in! (Patreon)
#Weekly TV Guide#Man this week just flew by for me - kinda overwhelming haha#Trying to balance everything has gotten precarious with all these soon-looming self-imposed deadlines! Trying to keep up!#I'm proud of how well I've been doing with it :) It's gotten kinda tricky lately tho haha#I'm managing! Still doodling and making and reading and playing between editing and writing and queueing haha#Speaking of queueing - MusicalBloodDrop and MusicalDrabbles are both back up and running! :D#Quite pleased!#MBD'll be going for another couple weeks but I was so behind on Drabbles that I'm set for a couple months lol#V'also go the Vargas sketchdump planned for next week - pls look forward to it :)#Hopefully this one won't break too badly lol#ANYway lol this week over here!#Lots of Sims 2 and Star Control and SCII-in-TS2 lol#Fun all around <3 I had a lot of fun making and screenshotting all of these hehe#Pretty sure this is also the last of the Handplates stuff for now - at least as far as what I've drawn lately#Never know when or what next haha#Well. I know what I've got coming up Soon hehe ♪
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reading book? too much effort. sitting down and writing replies?? can't focus.
youtube rabbit hole of in-depth Barbie history and architectural design of dream houses and playsets? i got all da focus in da world baybeee!
#barbie has always been an Interest especially in adult years since i more or less refrained from being#a hardcore barbie enjoyer because ykno not to gender talk on a tues but i rejected just about everything typically femme because i did not#want to be seen as femme or fully femme from a young age#so even if i really liked barbies i distanced myself from them pretty fast :'(#so now i think im compensating by like. instead of buying them for myself because i dont really want to collect. i just like lmao#obsessively info dive and watch commercial compilations and shit kdjfgdg#anyway did you know barbie has two younger siblings besides her main three that were actually her youngest ones#tutti and todd and they havent been seen since the late 90s? like theyre recognized in terms of history but in terms of#barbie lore and canon theyve been completely retconned out cuz theyve never shown up in sets or movies or anything#did you also know they were made of a bendable soft plastic as opposed to hard and the wires were prone to poking through and stabbing kids#and that the plastic stored like shit and if you put them (soft plastic) on your other dolls (hard) they would literally#melt into each other?? :)#barbie also has lots of cousins just got mentioned briefly and then annihilated from technical canon lol#oooh and then there's also Blaine who is an ex bf of barbie that was made specifically to date her briefly during a sort of campaign#barbie broke up with ken and got with blaine but ofc she got back with ken and after that blaine was never seen nor mentioned again. he deA#anyway happy tuesday im gonna eat my soup and try and break out of this info consuming trance so i can wrITE#oHOH and last silly trivia being barbie has lots of canon relatives that havent been retconned or anything BUT they've also never been made#into dolls. off the top of my head i think some of these include like uhhh her mom and dad and some aunts and shit#tho i think these are either just mentioned in passing or from the barbie movies or some in books
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Idk if this is a coincidence loll but ever since I broke up with my partner I have an appetite again lol
#I’ve been eating so much more these past few weeks which is a good thing!#I’ve gotten a lot of food intolerances over the past year so eating is hard for me bc I’m scared everything is gong to hurt my tummy loll#but I’ve been making more meals and snacking more and just being motivated to eat lately so that’s good!#asked my doctor for a nutritionist referral too so I can get help planning meals that won’t hurt my tummy or make me dizzy loll#I’ve been telling doctors about this for like 2 years and so far no one has helped me lol#my doctor just gave me Prozac and said good luck bestie! loll#personal
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