#everyone lied also when they said that ppl will be really open to making friends at uni
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schizowitchic · 11 days ago
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i actually cant with this anymore ngl like. messaging my friends isnt an option bc theyre all out busy having actual lives. but i havent left my room all day and i have washing up to do and i have laundry to do but i cant fucking go in the kitchen bc being around my flatmates is so awkward. like. essentially i have zero friends right now because im nowhere near anyone i can speak to. the one person i could maybe consider as actually having made a friend lives on basically the other side of the city. i want to go get food from kitchen so bad but i cant im gonna have to wait until later im not getting the laundry done. cant focus on the assignment. i have no idea how the fuck im meant to remedy this lmaooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
#have we considered im not cut out for uni#unfortunately its the only thing ive ever wanted to do (go to uni) but turns out it lowkey sucks lol#i cant drop out because there is literally nothing else i want to do#vent#i do have an appointment with mental health services on tuesday#but they have such low availability i had to pick which lecture i was willing to miss in order to go#which is great!!#i dont have high hopes because the only advice ive been given in regards to the flatmate situation is#“give it a couple weeks and youll get to know them”#“just talk to them”#hello?? they dont want to talk to me thats why all the conversations fell flat on their face#plus they arent nice when theyre drunk and they are often drinking!!#my mum keeps being like “its okay if you drop out”#what the fuck am i meant to do then#like am i destined to permanently be living at home working at mcdonalds#will end it all if so#tw suicidal thoughts#like. my two childhood dreams were 1) have purple hair 2) go to university#succeeded on the first one at least#but also theres no job that i want to go into. other people can maybe name one or two jobs theyd be happy to do#or have some idea of a career path#but all jobs sound awful and not what i want to be doing in life#i dont know what im going to do if it turns out i cant hack uni#theres nothing else for me#everyone lied also when they said that ppl will be really open to making friends at uni#i tried to put myself out there and go out of my comfort zone and speak to people#and it became apparent that they were not interested#“go to a society youll meet people”#no. they show up with people they are already friends with. and even if you try to speak to them.#they are not very reciprocal and quickly go back to just talking to their friends theyve already made
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majoringinsarcasm · 2 years ago
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WHAT THE HECK IS UP PARTY PEOPLE THIS EPISODE WAS MADE FOR ME SPECIFICALLY LETS GOOOOO
Well if we didn’t know from the title alone what was gonna happen heheheheh
WAIT THE INTO CHANGED E SEE JAUNES FACE SHUT UP AHHHH
Oh ok I see this chapter was made to hurt me personally ok cool
HE SAW CRESCENT ROSE????
what the fuck
This is a literal horror movie HE PICKED A CLOCK FROM A TREE AND TIME WENT BACKWARDS HES ALL ALONE
Hey uh here uh hey what the FUCK
HE HAD TO WAIT FOR THEM TO FALL im sick I’m so sick
NOT A GROUP HUG I SAID I WOULD DISSOLVE AND NOW IM CRYING NOOOOOOOOO
I’m so serious if he dies or cannot go back home I will not be able to handle it. Like y’all don’t get it I will Not be consolable
AYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY AYYYYYYYYYYYY KARA MUST BE LOVING THIS OK WHITEKNIGHT OK OK I SEE YOU
I know a lot of ppl don’t like it bc early volume Jaune was a total dork loser nerd almost nice guy but really he wasn’t he was just a dork but I don’t have many super strong opinions about ships besides the bees, Renora and I think Rosegarden is cute. So while I’m not like an active Whiteknight shipper…. Girl get it lmao WEISS YOUR FACE HAHAHAH
Im gonna Cry
Like I just wanna be clear I’m not Mad at Jaune At All. This poor guy has been here alone for years and has had plenty of time to “lick his wounds” but he had to do it Alone with no outside input or kind words or a friend to cry with. Him being harsh makes me sad bc it just. When Ren yelled at him after they lost Oscar he didn’t lash out or Anything but the girls sitting and talking and arguing sets him off bc. He’s been ALONE I’m so sick
His village 🥺 he knows the names of places I’m
What if he really doesn’t go back I know there was talk of Neo staying behind but y’all
Im. Going. To. Scream.
WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ONNNNNNNNNNNNMN also I can’t tell if the Ever After has independent weather as well as reaching to Ruby OR if it’s now reaching to Jaune
Im scared
WHO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO bitch we are getting Lore
Is the cat Louis / Lewis
This cat leave my man ALONE
BITCH WHAT IS HAPPENING
A PUNDERSTORM???? Or like Ponder said a different way THIS IS SO MUCH
And it does have its own weather lmao
UM WEISS HELLO
she really is the star of this volume like I’m sorry that’s the truth
“Must’ve had something bigger to work out” OK OK OK OK OK
Ok but I hate heights so I would throw up or pass out if I was Blake and Yang like bruh
HOW DO WE TSKE THE NEXT STEP AHHHHHHHHHHH
LOL Jaune please
Ok so time loops and time trickery are hard. So. Jaune turned back time enough for Alyx and Louis to show up which was. A long time ago maybe idk. So it’s not Neo bc Neo had not yet fallen.so what the hell did Herb show her
POISON?????
Stop it oh my god they’re too cute the emotional whiplash of me crying over Jaune and me crying over Bees I can’t handle it
SHE THINKS HER CAT EARS ARE CUUUUUTE
MAYBE ITS SAYING THINGS WE NEVER SAID TO EACH OTHER
Blake loves how honest Yang is. Adam only ever told her lies or tried to convince her that his way was the correct way. Yang listens to her and never sugarcoats; she never tries to trick. She Does What She Says
Blake never gave up on her even when she showed similar signs of being like Adam she decided to trust her. She wasn’t intimidated by how loud and brash and in her space Yang was. She knows what matters to her and has never been afraid to go for them
ANY BIG TRUTHS WE HAVEN'T DROPPED ON EACH OTHER YET
NOBODY TOUCH ME THE COLORS ARE SO BEAUTIFUL YANG IS AFRAID TO STEP OUT ONTO THE OPEN AIR SHE IS AFRAID BUT BLAKE ITS OK ITS OK YANG BLAKE WILL BE THERE WITH YOU
Also the blushing here is like idk what but it looks so good. Like I can’t describe what I mean but the way it makes their eyes look so bright it’s just very good AND SEEING YANG BLUSH SO MUCH SHE'S SO CUTE
EVERYONE SIT DOWN NOBODY MOVE GET ON THE GROUND LOOK AT THIIIIIIIS LOOK AT THEEEEEEM
BLAKE LMAO BLAKE WAS READYYYYYY
STOP ATOP STOP IM CRYING OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOD THEY ARE SO CUUUUUUUUTE THE BLUSHING IM TELLING YOU ITS SO GOOD THIS IS ALL SO FUCKING BEAUTIFUL
DO YOU LOVE THE COLOR OF THE BUMBLEBY SKY
and then back to my saddest boy ever GOD the whiplash
Alright cat I understand how you feel. But the girls up front told you they were trying to go home. Yes they were trying to get you to take them there but they didn’t offer you any deals or say they would bring you to Remnant. Unless you’re Louis and we’re betrayed by your sister in which case that’s fucked up and I’m on your side it all depends on WHAT THE FUCK ALYX DID DOES ANYONE KNOW CAUSE WE STILL DONT
but like we have four episodes left WHAT are we gonna do gang
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
NOT BLAKE WITH THE PRINCESS DIARIES FOOT POP
JAUNE SHIPS IT TOO LETS GOOOOOOOOOOOOO LMAO HES BEEN WAITING THE LONGEST OF ANYONE
oh my god if that’s crescent rose I’m gonna scream
Oh but she doesn’t want it / isn’t ready to pick it up again GOD IM CRYING
so. Is she gonna trade crescent rose in order to leave is that the vibe I’m getting.
GOD THAT WAS SO FUCKING GOOD I won’t lie I was spoiled about the kiss but that was my own being silly fault but I only knew that they did kiss and not THE COMPLIMENTS AND CONFESSION BRIDGE and also like. Y’all I love Jaune Arc of the Arc Family so goddamn much so this episode was for me THEY CHANGED THE INTRO TO SHOW HIS SAD FACE god lordy what the fuck is next week gonna do to me
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thequackcity · 3 years ago
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Quackity and Schlatt’s Relationship - More Complicated Then You Think
(this is all /rp and about the characters from the dream smp! pls assume i have the dignity not to write analysis of youtubers)
recently there was a bit of discourse surrounding the relationship between Quackity and Schlatt floating around on tumblr. tho i never saw the original post that sparked the conversation, i did see a few posts that were inspired by it mentioning how they disliked that the original post implied that Quackity and Schlatt were mutually abusive and/or equally bad for each other 
since i never saw the original post, i can't be sure if that's what the op meant to imply. it's not really my place to speak about a post that i never got the chance to read. BUT the conversation that was caused by the post in question did get me thinking about how this fandom treats the relationship between Quackity and Schlatt and how little nuance there is in discussions about it
now before i say anything else, i want to make a few things clear:
i don't think Quackity and Schlatt’s relationship is mutually abusive. no need to worry about hearing that from this post
i don't look down on ppl who have different interpretations of their relationship
there will be potentially triggering content in this analysis. i will place a quick warning whenever i think one is needed!
their relationship is romantic in canon and therefore i’ll be treating it as romantic
alright now that we’ve gotten all of that out of the way, we can finally get on with the analysis! i apologize for how long this is gonna be
part 1: let's talk relationship!
i think we can all agree that Quackity and Schlatt’s relationship was not exactly a healthy one. tho it didn't start out that way, it certainly turned into what could be read as abusive or toxic (i personally read their relationship as being abusive in its later half due to evidence provided by the text, but i understand if others prefer to view it as just toxic instead)
but what happened that led to their partnership ending so badly? what caused all of this mess?
well, it was a lot of things. but we will get to that later. let's talk relationship first!
from the very beginning, Quackity and Schlatt’s relationship was pretty one-sided. tho they both clearly liked each other as friends/partners in crime both before and after the election (yes they did interact before the election!) Quackity was also interested in Schlatt romantically- something that Schlatt wasn't fully committed to
as we all know from the infamous date stream and from a few other moments, Quackity and Schlatt enjoyed playfully flirting with each other- tho it was pretty obvious that Quackity was more serious about it then Schlatt was even tho Schlatt considered Quackity to be very attractive
in my opinion, Quackity is someone who wants a long term relationship, while Schlatt is more interested in flings. this can be seen in Schlatt refusing to marry Quackity and rejecting most of his advances while Quackity tried his best to convince him to feel otherwise. Tommy put it best: Quackity is just one of Schlatt’s many bitches U_U
to Quackity, the romantic aspect of their relationship was very important. because Schlatt never actually shot him down or told him that he didn't feel the same way, Quackity took that to mean that they were truly in love. Schlatt on the other hand wasn't very invested in the romantic side of things but clearly valued Quackity’s looks and his support as an ally against Pogtopia so he never fully rejected Quackity’s advances
this might not seem like too big of a deal considering the other things that happened between them, but i think it shows part of the nature of their relationship. there is a lot of miscommunication and, on Schlatt’s end, manipulation of emotions. love is a strong motivator for loyalty and Schlatt is a smart guy who would know how to use that to his advantage
but that isn't to say that Schlatt didn't ever care about Quackity!
Schlatt is a complicated guy and figuring out when he's actually being genuine can be pretty difficult. but i think there are some moments that point to Schlatt genuinely caring about Quackity
when he was alive, Schlatt was pretty paranoid. not as paranoid as Wilbur, but certainly up there. but there were never any times where he truly questioned Quackity’s loyalties after his first day as president. Schlatt also seemed truly upset that Quackity betrayed him, bringing up their status as partners in crime while ranting about how much it hurt him and singling Quackity out while talking about how he had been abandoned during his time of need
Schlatt also spent a lot of time sulking after Quackity betrayed him and whining to Ponk about needing a new bitch. this is in contrast to how angry he was after Tubbo betrayed him- both during and after the execution
there is also the situation with the Big Man Gym 
after being dead for a while, Schlatt contacted Quackity despite them leaving off on bad terms and asked for him to visit him in his cave gym. when Quackity showed up, Schlatt talked about how he valued their relationship and the good times they had together. tho this can easily be seen as emotional manipulation, Schlatt’s a lot smarter than he seems and- if he doesnt have memory issues due to being a ghost- would know that Quackity’s opinion of him was in the dump at the time of his death and most likely wouldn't have improved since then. Fundy has a higher opinion of Schlatt than Quackity does and is someone who obviously craves validation. but Schlatt went to Quackity first anyway and trusted him to help revive him
i think that this is all good evidence that points towards Schlatt truly caring about Quackity as much as someone like Schlatt can care about anyone- or at least valuing him as a companion
i also think that it is pretty common knowledge that Quackity cared about Schlatt- and possibly still does- but i will go over a bit of evidence that i haven’t already mentioned before we move on to the next part
Quackity tried multiple times to impress Schlatt (like when he lied about knowing how to play chess), would attempt to help Schlatt when he was drowning in water, sadly said that they could have had something together while Schlatt was dying in the caravan, and implied that he wouldn’t have left if Schlatt hadn’t taken down the white house. Quackity also willingly went to the Big Man Gym after being summoned there by Schlatt and wanted to revive him long before the revive book became part of the story
part 2: what made it fall apart?
everything i've said so far has been pretty interesting (hopefully) but it doesn't really answer the original question: what went wrong to turn Schlatt and Quackity’s mainly positive partnership sour?
well it comes down to two things in my opinion: their incompatible desires for political power and Schlatt’s deteriorating mental state
Quackity wanted political power from the beginning and wasn't afraid to be open about his desires. he pooled his votes with Schlatt because Schlatt offered him the position of vice president, something Wilbur and Tommy weren’t willing to give to him. tho Quackity obviously cared about L’Manburg and wanted to see good things for it, he also desired power and was willing to team up with someone he didn't fully agree with to get said power
at 32:40 in this video, Quackity talks about how in politics everyone uses everyone so it's alright if Schlatt is using him. he then talks about how he doesn't want to be a man with no power and how he understands that Schlatt’s main goal is also gaining/keeping power. Quackity also shows a bit of his naughty evil side by saying if he overthrows Schlatt then the fun ends too early! 
(side note: these two are pretty evenly matched in intelligence and manipulativeness, i love it!) 
it's a bit of a fandom misconception that Quackity was a love sick yes man during the Manburg era. tho Quackity did want to please Schlatt and was in love with him, he didn't shy away from standing up to or disagreeing with Schlatt when he believed it was needed
at around 26:12 of this video, Quackity and Schlatt meet together in private and Quackity tells Schlatt off for playing down his role in the power structure of Manburg. since this was very early in Schlatt’s reign, Quackity shows no fear towards him and confidently tells him not to treat him like that
Quackity also broke Niki out of jail after regretting letting her be put there in the first place, tried to convince Schlatt to not execute Tubbo, jumped in front of Fundy when Schlatt tried to attack him, tried to stop Schlatt from tearing down buildings, and attempted to protect the white house he built from being destroyed by Schlatt. these are not behaviors of a pure yes man but of someone who, despite fear, has the confidence to speak up for himself even when disrespected by someone in authority
Quackity has always been someone who wanted power and someone who was never a yes man to authority. this contradicts with how Schlatt believed Quackity should act as vice president. in Schlatt’s opinion, Quackity’s one job is to sit around looking pretty while Schlatt does all of the important things and holds all of the power. Schlatt was a big fan of promoting people to worthless positions of authority and its pretty obvious that he considered vice president to be similar to the fake positions he gave Fundy and Tubbo 
in the end, this was a big part of what destroyed their relationship. like it or not, Quackity’s a power hungry guy and always has been. he didn't like that Schlatt constantly shoved him aside and refused to listen to him
now onto the nasty bit...Schlatt’s mental state
cw for mentions of alcoholism, mental deterioration, and abusive behavior  
before i say anything more, i just want to say that i don't think having issues with alcoholism makes someone a bad person. i personally have some issues with such things so it would be pretty stupid of me to say being an alcoholic makes you a bad person. alcoholism does negatively affect your cognitive functions tho and, combined with other health issues, can cause some of the very serious mental problems that Schlatt clearly struggles with
throughout the Manburg era, Schlatt’s mental state rapidly deteriorated. he went from a pretty normal- if eccentric- guy who had a drinking problem, to someone who was delirious most of the time. it's a sharp and noticeable decline that caused a lot of pain for Quackity due to Schlatt often taking his excess aggression out on him by yelling at him and/or belittling him. tho Schlatt often belittled Quackity before he went fully off of the deep end, it was never as aggressive as it was when he was in this delirious state of mind
it was during one of Schlatt’s most aggressive and delirious moments that he tore down the white house despite Quackity’s protests. as we all know, this caused Quackity to snap and kill Schlatt (it's more complicated than that but we will get back to that). as mentioned previously, Quackity implied that he would have stayed with Schlatt if the white house hadn’t been destroyed
in my opinion, these two things combined are the biggest reasons why Quackity and Schlatt’s relationship fell apart. their differing desires for power were not compatible and Schlatt’s awful behavior while his mental state declined caused a rift between them that couldn't be fixed
part 3: how toxic was it really?
cw for emotional and physical abuse 
as i said all the way back in part one, Quackity and Schlatt’s relationship was not healthy. i have provided many examples in the other two parts that shine a light onto why it wasn't healthy, but i didn't show the entire picture
there are many moments that show exactly how Schlatt treated Quackity when he was acting at his worst and none of them are pretty. tho Schlatt was never truly aggressive with his insults until he started to go off of the deep end, that doesn't mean that what he said wasn't negatively affecting Quackity
Schlatt would belittle, insult, and mock Quackity for his appearance not being up to his standards, for his opinions, and for being emotional in ways that Schlatt disapproved of like crying. tho Schlatt would often brush off Quackity’s reactions towards this cruel behavior, it's very clear that Schlatt’s treatment of him has stuck with Quackity in many ways
Quackity is very sensitive about his appearance and it seems to be because of how badly Schlatt hurt his self esteem during their time together. Schlatt tied Quackity’s worth to his appearance and then would claim he wasn't meeting his standards of attractiveness. we can tell that this has stuck with Quackity because of his sensitivity towards people bringing up the scar on his face (something that greatly alters his physical appearance) and he still reacts very badly when Schlatt calls him the mocking nickname flatty patty
speaking of flatty patty- that stupid insult shockingly has a lot of weight in Quackity’s relationship with Schlatt. tho its something the audience is meant to laugh at, the nickname also shows just how little Schlatt respects Quackity because he's constantly throwing it around just to make Quackity upset. Schlatt’s last words are flatty patty all because he wanted to get in one last dig at his ex and ruin Quackity’s day even further 
Schlatt tends to do a lot of things that are intended to make Quackity upset. tearing down the room Quackity made for him in the white house is the biggest example of this- especially since Schlatt mentions how it will upset Quackity while he does it. you can see this moment at around 19:10 of this video
and now let's get into the elephant in the room when it comes to these two: Quackity was scared of Schlatt. tho we never really see Schlatt hit or attack Quackity physically outside of their confrontation at the white house or their confrontation in the caravan, these clips imply that Quackity was at the very least scared of Schlatt physically harming him in some way 
as for actually physically harming him, Schlatt hits Quackity multiple times with a pickaxe and with his fists during their white house fight. Quackity hits Schlatt a couple times too, tho these are all primarily defensive blows since he is trying to protect himself and his property. he also chases after Quackity with a bow after Quackity’s plan to trick him into signing Manburg over to the Pogtopians fails and hits him multiple times during the caravan confrontation
all of this evidence shows that Schlatt was an abusive (or at least toxic) partner towards Quackity and someone who greatly affected him in many ways
tho Quackity did a few questionable things throughout his relationship with Schlatt (such as trying to get Schlatt to have sex with him despite Schlatt not being interested as shown in the later half of this video) and did some downright morally wrong things during his time as vice president of Manburg, no one deserves the pain of an abusive relationship- even a person who has done bad things
as a brief side note before we move on because i know people will bring it up if i skip over it, Quackity did- and most likely still does- want to literally possess Glatt. he brought up reviving Schlatt and using him as a political pawn after Schlatt’s funeral and during their conversation at the Big Man Gym Quackity talked about owning Glatt and having him work at Las Nevadas with no pay
this is unsettling behavior to say the least but this essay isnt about the aftermath of their relationship so much as it is about their relationship when it was actually happening. maybe i will make another post talking more about how Quackity’s relationship with Schlatt affected him even after Schlatt’s death and/or about Quackity’s relationship with Glatt
part 4: final thoughts
i’m not exactly sure why the nuances in Schlatt and Quackity’s relationship get lost when it comes to the fandom, but it’s pretty disappointing to see. hopefully this essay can help people take a closer look at canon and maybe even help them find something interesting that they’d want to explore!
tho the point of this essay is to clear up any misconceptions and hopefully add some nuance to the conversations surrounding Schlatt and Quackity’s relationship, i also wrote it in hopes of showing people how fascinating these two partners in crime were back in the Manburg days. i didn’t cover everything but i think i did a pretty good job for my first analysis post in the dsmp fandom
also since you read to the end, i must say thank you! it really does means a lot to me that you did. i hope you enjoyed and maybe even learned something. this post can be used as a resource if anyone wants to use it as such
here’s a tiny devil Quackity for your troubles <3
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brickmcarthur · 2 years ago
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how i’d fix tdroti (this is mostly just an idea dump for now and it’s easily subject to change):
the overall season is longer with more reward challenges sprinkled in. that way, we get to know the characters more. also the first episode is a two-parter with the first elimination in the second episode.
more friendships and positive interactions between the girls PLEASE. some friendships i want explored include (but are not limited to) dawn/dakota, jo/zoey, and jo/anne maria (though i do think the last one is more of an enemies-to-friends kind of scenario where they come to respect each other over the season).
just… more friendships and duos in general other than the mike + zoey + cameron trio pls. there’s so much potential. lightning and sam. cameron and b. brick and dawn. brick and anne maria (!!!!!).
i want staci to be kinda rewritten so that she doesn’t just lie about her great-great-great-grandma inventing the wheel or smth. i want it so that she lies more about other things and how she’s greater than she actually is. have her lie about her accomplishments or skills (“oh yeah, i’m totally an expert at…”) and then when the time comes to prove herself, have her… kind of back out. i feel like if it’s shown that she lies out of insecurity and inadequacy (especially since each contestant has something unique about them), it’d make her more than just the “annoying character who’s meant to go first” yknow. i mean she’d probably still go home first but you get what i mean.
i also want zoey to be rewritten so she’s more of the “indie chick” she is. what i mean by that is that she should be a bit more openly judgmental and that’s the reason why she can’t make the friends she desperately wants. i mean it already happens in canon but i want it to be more pronounced/notable yknow. her emotional journey would be to realize that all the jocks and preps she dislikes are essentially people at the end of the day, and that she has to open up to other people even though they don’t share her niche interests. basically kind of like gwen but still more bubbly/friendly. she’d also wear glasses.
mike is… a difficult subject because of how badly his character was handled in the original. i don’t have did, so i can’t say much about how i’d portray his did more realistically (ik it’d be easier if i’d just write him out; however, i def know there’s a lot of ppl with did out there who like him and have rewritten him to be more realistic…so i’ll look into that). that being said, i do feel like his (base) personality can be rewritten. he’s shyer, more withdrawn, nervous, and secretive. he has trouble standing up for himself and doesn’t like having a lot of attention on him (which makes working in teams difficult). i also feel like his outfit would be different; he’d wear a baggy hoodie and can occasionally be seen with the hood over his hair.
i think it’d be interesting if dawn basically kind of acts as everyone’s secret psuedo-therapist. she may be odd and kind of invasive when it comes to reading auras, but she’s a nice person who really just wants to be helpful and provide insight.
^ characters that i feel like she’d try to help/befriend based on this (with varying levels of success): zoey, mike, dakota, brick, jo, scott possibly
^^ i also think it’d be interesting if her and scott were either long-term enemies or frenemies
dakota did not need to get mutated midway through the season ok.
^ that being said, i think it’d be interesting to potentially explore the effects of the toxic waste on the other characters as well. like what if cameron got mutated instead? what if dawn’s powers were enhanced? what if lightning got lightning powers fghdshfdjsk there’s so many possibilities
scott does NOT get put in the trauma chair at the end of the season.
jo makes it to the top 2 💋
anyway these are all i have so far but i may add more later
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moonvyx · 3 years ago
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Amos'Little Angel - Harry Potter
This idea just popped up in my mind. Most likely from a Hiro Hamada X Reader story I've read aged ago and decided to come back to me and hit me like the Hogwarts Express.
You're the youngest Diggory btw, as you can see from the title. And everyone lives. Cause frik you Voldy, stay handsome like Tom Riddle.
AND Y'ALL DON'T KNOW HOW TO WALK VERY MUCH AND THE WAY U GUYS SPEAK ARE YK, HOW LITTLE BABIES/TODDLERS SPEAK.
I went to school when I was 2- I don't really know HOW could I talk at a young age but oh weLL-
"Amos!" James explained happily, opening the door for his friend and his family.
"Hello, James." Smiled Amos, "It's nice to see you and little Harry again!" He smiled at the 2 year old Potter, who was playing with a stag, werewolf and dog plushie.
"And it's also nice to you too! Is this
Y/N? The little.angel Cedric has been talking about?" James questioned and Amos nodded. "Yep! Just turned 2 last week. Very cheeky, I say. Knows many ways to prank at a very young age." Amos replied while letting his daughter down on the play mat where Harry was sitting on.
Y/N smiled at her dad and looked at Harry, who felt her gaze and turned to face her as well. Harry placed his plushies down and waved and walked slowly to her, "Hewo," He waved. Y/N stared at his mesmerising eyes before waving back. "Henlo."
"I'm Harry, you?" Asked Harry, his head tilting a bit. "I'm Y/N." Y/N smiled at Harry.
"Wanna play?" He offered, handing out the werewolf plushie. "Okway."
Y/N said and took the plushie from his hand carefully.
"Hey N/N!" The two young lovebirds- ahem. I mean kids looked up to see Cedric, Y/N's older brother of course.
"Hi Ceddy." His little sister smiled brightly at her brother. "Look! Harry and I are playing!" She laughed, making the two boys smile.
After a few minutes of playing, they began to feel sleepy.
"Aww, they look tired." Lily cooed and picked up the two gently and slowly. "Hey Amos, I'm just going to put these two cuties to bed if that's alright." Lily asked Amos quietly. "Sure! I don't mind." He said and continued to talk to Arthur.
Lily slowly lied the two down on Harry's crib (which can fit 3 kids cause Harry is a messy sleeper). "Goodnight," Lily kissed the children's forehead before leaving the room.
A few hours later, Amos, James, Lily and almost everyone who was in their little get-together (which was a lot of ppl btw.) entered the room and found the kids hugging each other as they slept.
A chorus of "aw's" and clicks from camera's filled the room, but luckily Harry and Y/N were still sound asleep.
"We should have more get togethers with all of the kids." James said to everyone, who nodded in agreement.
"Yeah, put them all in one room while we get drunk too." Sirius said and received a smack on the arm from Molly. "I'm just kidding.. Or am I?" He spoke again and received another smack on the head from James.
"20 galleons if these two catch feelings during their Hogwarts years." The Weasley twins said at the same time. "Add 10 galleons to that if they catch feelings before their Hogwarts years." Sirius said. "Bet." The twins replied and snapped more pictures of the children.
"Imagine Ron third wheeling tho." Said Bill.
"50 galleons if he does." Dumbledore said and received weird looks.
"How and when did he get there?" Asked the twins as Dumbledore smiled at the two. "I ship."
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hezuart · 3 years ago
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That anaversary aizen looks absolutely fabulous, he looks like a figure skater xd.
I heard along time ago the last arc of the anime was being animated finally bc they pulled a 90s sailor moon were the last season was not either animated or dubbed untill decades later.
I recall near the end of the current 366 episodes there was an episode were the creapy demon ppl woke up in hell and we're all bitter, and there was the other guy who was like, iM cOmEiNg FoR u IChIgO, but then is never mentioned again after and I'm like,why? Why is lt there just plopted randomly into a different arc that seams unrelated.
And locking aizen up underground seems ok, but It deff won't hold, and he will. Escape, and he will kill, you either need that one spell from star, dubbed, the darkest spell of moon the undaunted, a powerfull dark spell that killed immortal beings, that came from best character, eclipsa, the queen of darkness.
We need that.
Or stick him I'm crystal like eclipsa was in star. Is there no one who could trap him in ice or crystal for all eternity.
How about throw him into the centre of a volcano trapped and caged , forverr being killed by heat?
I assume there's space travel, send I'm into a black whole, were a black whole don't fuckin care if your immortal or fat, you will die
:3
Yes, I love anniversary Aizen. His original octopus-butterfly hollow design was ugly so I'm glad he's back to being the fashion icon he is.
Locking Aizen up underground once is one thing, doing it twice after saying he got more powerful by just sitting there, and he escaped to battle the Quincy Soul King God... is another. I think he should have escaped at the end of the Quincy arc. That is the only feasibility.
I heard the anime is coming back for the Quincy arc as well, but because of COVID its probably going to be delayed. (I'm not gonna watch it until the Rain section of the arc then I'm dipping out. I'm only here for Zangetsu)
and funny that you mention that hell scene in the manga :)
-> spoilers for the new BLEACH 73 page anniversary chapter / thoughts/critique on it
So hey you had a premonition! Syazel .... returned? And his hole is outside of his body??? for some reason???
(I didn't understand the explanation or why / how that happens and what that means for the hollow)
And my friend and I were laughing because out of ALL the things. Kubo could do in this anniversary. He gave Syazel his dick back after going to hell. That is iconic. (that's where his hole was located, and now that its not on his body ... well...) This is the funniest thing Kubo has EVER pulled. Kudos to you, sir.
The entire internet is freaking out over Ukitake being in hell. Honestly Kubo has done far worse, and we've established that Soul Society is a corrupt system that hasn't changed, so I'm not surprised he would pull something like this.
At the same time, Kubo 1. cheated his audience. 2. continues to prove me right that he cannot bring himself to kill his characters
1. Hollows who have commit murder in their human life are sent to hell. Syazel and Aaorniero are two of these hollows, and yet, when they are killed, there is NO gates of hell scene. We see them there later in the hell chapter (which was more of a promotion for the fourth movie and I didn't believe it would hold any merit)
But the same goes for Ukitake. We never see the gates of hell take him. What, was hell late? Did hell's gates get lost like an uber before picking him up? It's bull. Withholding such vital information from your audience, not showing the gates of hell when they should pick up this soul IMMEDIATELY is ... I mean its a lie. Kubo lied to his audience.
2. Now we are told powerful shinigami are sent to hell when they die. First of all that sounds like a security threat. Wouldn't shinigami want revenge for that? Or attempt to escape? Why would they still hold loyalty after being sent to a prison of eternal suffering?
Also "Yhwach and Aizen" were the only ones keeping Hell's gates closed is way too convenient and doesn't really make any sense. I feel like Aizen should have deliberately gone to hell to retrieve powerful shinigami / hollows for his army instead of keeping it /closed/.
This is definitely a Kubo-doesn't-know-what-he's-doing-and-is -making- stuff-up-as-he-goes, but it might have a pinch of merit because of previous plot lines.... but either way, there's some big plot holes here, but again, its Kubo, so I expected nothing less.
Again, he can't kill off his characters. He introduced zombification, he introduced immortality through the hougyoku, he has Orihime and Hachigen's reversal / rejection abilities. He brought back Luppi, friggen.... a character who's entire upper half of his body was incinerated. Like.... come on. No. He's dead, you can't bring him back like that. That's a cop out and just weird. You're taking away consequences and grief.
(Also Yamamoto and Unohana deserve to be in hell far over Ukitake, they've done some fcked up stuff in their pasts unlike him)
Also Kubo's favorite character is Mayuri, which.... you're allowed to have a favorite problematic character. But Keeping said character alive and bared from the consequences of abusing his daughter, murdering innocents, and experimenting on your own squad members? Nah. Nope. Kill him, Kubo. Kill this dude.
(his weird attachment to Mayuri is probably why he keeps bringing Syazel back, since Syazel is Mayuri 2.0, but Syazel is the bad guy who does face consequences for his actions while Mayuri is not)
~
Also, I'm certain Kazui and Orihime are going to be THRILLED that their precious husband/dad is going to hell when he dies :)
(I just... Rukia teased Ichigo about leaving Orihime at home. She teased him about having a house wife who he leaves all the chores to. Orihime had two panels. She checks on her son who promised he would be at home and sleep. Kazui fcking breaks his promise like it never mattered to him and JUMPS out the window after pretending to sleep in front of his mother. ... An 8 year old... alone... in the middle of the night.)
Orihime is abandoned. She is not invited to SS, she is not informed of what is going on, her son leaves her.... I...
Orihime is a side character. She doesn't matter anymore. She hasn't mattered for a long, long time.
A part of me is glad she had little screen time, since she tends to waste it, but another part of me is embroiled with rage.
I've even see people try to defend this. "Orihime and Ichigo can't be together ALL the time, that's an unhealthy relationship!" and I'm like guys... that's not the point. The point is Orihime is not part of Ichigo's other life. Any shinigami stuff from now on is none of her business. She's going to stay at home while Kazui and Ichigo go off and save the world. Ichigo is going to be fighting by Rukia and Renji while Orihime watches from the sidelines, or worse, doesn't even know what is going on with her husband and son. Orihime is going to be uninformed and abandoned, because she has not proven she is capable of fighting by their sides(go on, @ me. I will fight this. She's a failure.), and also because she prefers a human life over a dead one. Which is ironic, because she married a dead man. Ichigo is a shinigami, and he will be one forever. god forbid she ever meets his Zanpaktou. She would tremble in fear at the monsters her husband harbors in his soul, especially when she realizes they don't care about her and would rather see her dead. (Zangetsu would absolutely kill Orihime. Not sure about Kazui, but Orihime has not accepted Zangetsu, she does not like either of them, and the feeling is assuredly mutual.) frick now I want to make a comic about this
Also still frustrated over Zangetsu's shikai / bankai regression. Kubo once again lied to his audience. Ichigo has no bankai. How ridiculous is that? The main character of BLEACH doesn't have a bankai. Insulting.
(RIP to Chad. He doesn't exist anymore. He's just gone. No mention, no cameo. Gone.)
Kazui is a demon child. That character from the novels? Hikone? They're the same character. Literally same personality, same power level. Its worse because Kazui is a liar. He constantly goes behind his parents' backs. He can summon creepy fish and creepy eyeballs and open portals like is ANYONE aware of this? How has SS not kidnapped Ichigo's son and experimented on him / locked away his powers yet? All substitute shinigami require a reiatsu controlling / spy badge to keep them in line. Where is Kazui's? Or is he just a weird fullbringer?
I was worried Kubo was gonna try and pull a knock off Boruto but luckily he kept the focus on Ichigo and the others. But that being said, Ichika and Kazui are now just... sort of there? Kazui was kinda just.... having his own adventure that doesn't matter to the plot at hand, and Ichika had some nice characterization at first but she just hid behind her dad the whole time.
I have a feeling Kazui is gonna step in at the last minute or do some major behind the scenes thing that indirectly interferes with the main plot so no one will realize how powerful and dangerous he actually is. Its sad because Ichika is the superior character in personality and likability, but she clearly is not going to have a bigger part in this.
Ichigo having a normal life after everything still feels extremely boring and uncomfortable to me. Everyone's like 'I'm still bLEACH!" but.... BLEACH just... doesn't feel like BLEACH anymore. It hasn't for a while now.
~~~
There's two new shinigami characters. Didn't care for the girl, but the Sign Language kid who talks to animals is adorable ... however... he just reminds me of Chad, and I just... it hurts knowing Chad has essentially been deleted. Chad and Orihime are officially benched. They have chosen the human world, and Orihime has given Ichigo his spawn so she has no more use/purpose to him anymore... ////sigh
~~~
Also. This is claimed to be a new "arc". So is the BLEACH manga coming back? What is happening. I thought Kubo was tired and didn't want to do BLEACH anymore. I thought Shounen Jump cut him off. People made so many excuses for Kubo and why the past two arcs have been so badly written the past 6 years and now almost everything they've attempted to defend him with has been revoked.
BLEACH is going to continue to screw up its plot lines and characters, so Its probably best for it to stay dead but I've seen a lot of Kubo stans drooling over this content, they're desperate for BLEACH's return, but its already given out all its possible revelations. There's really nothing else to top here. It's just going to make things up as it goes along ,and I'm not really here for half-assed writing like that, especially since the damage of rushing the previous manga has already been done. Kubo and Shounen Jump are riding off a money nostalgia. None of this was planned.
Honestly though.... overall feeling of this chapter, not as bad as it could have been.
Syazel stole the spotlight, and he's my friend's favorite character, so that's all that really matters.
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pinkfey · 2 years ago
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jasmine please spare some saskia (& saskia/nick) facts ….. i am begging on my hands and knees ….. 💖🥺
WHEHEHEHEHEHE ask and you shall receive my beloved, i’m FULL of saskia fun facts <33
SO as i said in her edit, she’s the daughter of a very affluent architect who worked on several building plans for aeon and she’s following in his footsteps!! her father is a second gen japanese immigrant while her mother is a first gen dutch immigrant!!
she’s not a ment (#normalgirl), with a pollard score of four, and she kinda.... mocks ments (which is part of why audra ADORES her). having come with her father to work so often as a kid, she’s met more than her fair share of egotistical asswipes
except gray <3 gray is her buddy, her little scrunkly, and she ran more in his circle of friends, which is why she and nick/audra had never met (and why nick felt total betrayal upon learning gray has known her for so long and never introduced them)
speaking of, i loveeeee her and nick’s meet cute. saskia is her father’s “apprentice” of sorts and when she came by aeon to oversee some of his plans, nick was like 👀 hello who is this. nick is super used to people kissing his ass and acting all starstruck when they meet him, so when she has absolutely zero reaction to seeing The Justice, he has to double check and is like “ahaha do you know who i am? 🫦” to which she bluntly responds “should i?” and to nick it’s like omg...... beautiful woman who doesn’t know my reputation and kinda dislikes me........ WIN!!!!!
and when he does "confess” he’s justice she’s like,, yeah duh i already know. nice callsign btw did you mom pick it out for you. and nick’s like omg you lied!! and she’s like well technically i didn’t lie, i’m just not the type to fangirl over a ment. did you actually think there’s someone in this city who doesn’t know who you are? but instead of making him feel dumb she gets serious and says it’s okay, i prefer nick wiseman to justice. and that’s when he falls head over heels for her
but back to the fun facts!! she’s an only child and she loves her parents very deeply, and they love her!! they also love nick soooooo much (he got on their good side by learning how to cook some of their cultural dishes) and he loves them back because it’s nice to see a complete family so happy together for once :((( sadge…
she is extremely unimpressed by literally everything and nick takes it as the perfect challenge to try charming her with his winning charisma. and this king did literally EVERYTHING to try to get her to fall in love with him, he pined hard, and saskia was acutely aware of this whenever they hung out despite insisting their friendship was platonic. he was always upfront about his interest in her and she was in deep, deep denial she felt the same way. she was trying to avoid the responsibility you feel when someone loves you, y’know?? she didn’t want to power that comes with that
so when she finally comes to terms with herself and musters the courage to tell him that yes, she does like him back he’s like..... holy shit that’s the best thing i’ve ever heard
when they started dating, saskia made it very clear how much she did NOT want to be in the public eye, so nick kept it a secret from EVERYONE including audra :(( and audra.. did not take this well. at one point saskia came by the house to drop something off and audra answered and could tell something was off and gave nick an opportunity to confess, but he lied and said she was just a friend. so when audra saw the paparazzi photos she exploded (like,, audra is an open book to him and he keeps secrets from her???) and it caused a brief rift in their relationship bc like i’ve said before, audra really struggles seeing other ppl’s perspectives :((
part of saskia’s “arc” is dealing with the massive public scrutiny she faced when their relationship was exposed. it was overwhelming to see such backlash and to deal with a bombardment of photographs and reporters 24/7 and she even started having panic attacks for the first time in her life and this was SUPER foreign to saskia because she’s literally Saskia!! she’s confident !! untouchable !! but not anymore :((
on social media especially lots of justice fangirls acted absolutely insane over her when it became apparent that she’s not just another one of his flings, and in retaliation saskia got super passive aggressive fhjjhsjhs like the you wish you were me on her ig story. her twitter bio is “yeah my boyfriend is justice :)”
the turbulence of their relationship does eventually even out (thank GOD bc that was a rollercoaster) and audra becomes super close with her and everything is sunshine n rainbows !! i mean until nick explodes but, y’know
this was an infodump gjhssdhjskj but here are quicker facts!!
saskia bullies nick all the time (once nick snuck up behind her and covered her eyes and said “guess” and she said “i could smell justice’s 3-in-1 shampoo from here” and it devastated him because he takes such good care of his hair)
BUT she sees how hard he tries with his family and how much of the burden of the wisemans fell on his shoulders and even before dating one of her biggest priorities is to support him in the way he’s always supported others 🥺
like that dream nick has of opening a restaurant when he retires?? saskia designed it for him <3
nick brings her fun lil drinks while she works and ofc cooks for her all of the time. she has to beg him to eat out once in a while bc all of their date nights would be at home otherwise
she’s the epitome of Big Brother’s Cool Girlfriend and gives audra sisterly advice about her love life (which audra desperately needs as a serial romantic)
wow this is super long jsfhjfhsjhdf i hope u enjoyed i love her sooooooo much
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clerichs-xi · 3 years ago
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Getting real on main here bc I'm kinda tired of keeping everything in my head so I'm gonna ramble for a bit bc my blog my posts
Starting to realize more and more i don't know how to interact with people and im kinda starting to wonder if im neurodivergent or if im socially anxious
It's not just I don't know how to interact socially it's more like I don't know how to react in social so I end up mimicking what other ppl do in order to not get a negative reaction/keep up the convo in a natural way. I find I do it more online bc I have time to think about what I do+look back on messages and I end up being so paranoid about what I say or how my messages could get construed differently or how people could negatively react. Maybe it's more that I'm extremely prone to overthinking stuff but either way it makes me feel miserable sometimes, like I can't open up ever and most of the time I end up not opening up. I'm afraid of negative reactions and criticism bc I'm so prone to criticizing others myself. Also i grew up having most of my stuff (achievements, work, expressed thoughts) being reacted to with either neutral reactions or criticism on the basis of humility. Whoa that just got deep lol. Anyways after typing all of this out I feel like my issue mostly lies with my fears of being seen in a negative way or being disliked after saying something so I just end up. overthinking every single thing I want to say or not saying anything at all or both. It's wild how afraid I am of receiving any remotely negative feedback bc the moment I do I'll take to heart way too much and beat myself up over it!! Itll all I focus on and then I'll pick apart every single thing I ever did or said and make myself feel even more miserable!! I'm perfectly capable of discerning when something is my fault just. not when im talking to someone.
Tangent but since I'm here rambling already ill talk abt it and also kinda related. I never feel comfortable enough venting abt my life to close friends bc a) I'm seen as the functional one in the group; b) it seems everyone else's problems are bigger than mine and c) I'll feel like I'm complaining for no good reason mostly bc of a). I did have someone in my friend group say "what do u have to complain abt u have a functional family lol" once and that hurt. And that's why I never share anything anymore lol!!! Bc everyone I know says my life is perfect but a lot I wish I weren't me and I feel so trapped. It's gotten better bc I have been in situations b4 where I vented during really bad situations but I still don't rlly. And the fact that I only feel ok with venting in situations/with feelings that, in my mind, constituted as on par with other people's issues or of a certain level severity that was worth sharing and wouldn't face backlash for is. fucked up to say the least I think. Sometimes I think social media has played a role in fostering this idea bc of ppl constantly comparing and trying to 1-up others with their struggles. or ppl usinh catastrophic world events to go to other ppl saying "ur life will never be as bad as that so suck it up"
Uh anyways I think the neurodivergent part mostly bc i get uncomfortable when I'm not doing something and I can't really stand not doing smth. Ive seen some posts of neurodivergent people (esp posts abt adhd/ppl with adhd talking abt it) and kinda find myself relating to stimulation issues to a degree? I hate not doing anything productive eg drawing, writing. Sometimes I can't even stand just watching tv or reading bc sometimes I don't feel involved enough. If I'm interested in a piece of media I'll binge it for a couple of days and then the next day I'll feel nothing at all for it. Like idk maybe I'm thinking too hard and I don't actually know what I'm talking abt but at this rate I'd rather be wrong while try to explore this/put it into words then keep everything to myself just because I'm afraid of getting backlash or whatever from the 3 real people and 20 pornbots that follow me. Chances are this post wont receive any attention like literally anything else I've ever posted except it not getting attention will be what I want haha.
Tldr I'm just tired of trying to please people and bottling stuff up just bc I want ppl to like me and bc I don't want to burden others. I want to open up and have actual social interactions where I'm not overthinking everything I do. And I'm posting this to prove to myself that I'm going to change and get over it.
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somecunttookmyurl · 4 years ago
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Just to show you what this power looks like in your inbox. I present to you, my immortal, in it's entirety.
Chapter 1.
AN: Special fangz (get it, coz Im goffik) 2 my gf (ew not in that way) raven, bloodytearz666 4 helpin me wif da story and spelling. U rok! Justin ur da luv of my deprzzing life u rok 2! MCR ROX!
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Hi my name is Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way and I have long ebony black hair (that’s how I got my name) with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back and icy blue eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like Amy Lee (AN: if u don’t know who she is get da hell out of here!). I’m not related to Gerard Way but I wish I was because he’s a major fucking hottie. I’m a vampire but my teeth are straight and white. I have pale white skin. I’m also a witch, and I go to a magic school called Hogwarts in England where I’m in the seventh year (I’m seventeen). I’m a goth (in case you couldn’t tell) and I wear mostly black. I love Hot Topic and I buy all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing a black corset with matching lace around it and a black leather miniskirt, pink fishnets and black combat boots. I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, black eyeliner and red eye shadow. I was walking outside Hogwarts. It was snowing and raining so there was no sun, which I was very happy about. A lot of preps stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them.
“Hey Ebony!” shouted a voice. I looked up. It was…. Draco Malfoy!
“What’s up Draco?” I asked.
“Nothing.” he said shyly.
But then, I heard my friends call me and I had to go away.
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AN: IS it good? PLZ tell me fangz!
Chapter 2.
AN: Fangz 2 bloodytearz666 4 helpin me wif da chapta! BTW preps stop flaming ma story ok!
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The next day I woke up in my bedroom. It was snowing and raining again. I opened the door of my coffin and drank some blood from a bottle I had. My coffin was black ebony and inside it was hot pink velvet with black lace on the ends. I got out of my coffin and took of my giant MCR t-shirt which I used for pajamas. Instead, I put on a black leather dress, a pentagram necklace, combat boots and black fishnets on. I put on four pairs of earrings in my pierced ears, and put my hair in a kind of messy bun.
My friend, Willow (AN: Raven dis is u!) woke up then and grinned at me. She flipped her long waist-length raven black hair with pink streaks and opened her forest-green eyes. She put on her Marilyn Manson t-shirt with a black mini, fishnets and pointy high-heeled boots. We put on our makeup (black lipstick white foundation and black eyeliner.)
“OMFG, I saw you talking to Draco Malfoy yesterday!” she said excitedly.
“Yeah? So?” I said, blushing.
“Do you like Draco?” she asked as we went out of the Slytherin common room and into the Great Hall.
“No I so fucking don’t!” I shouted.
“Yeah right!” she exclaimed. Just then, Draco walked up to me.
“Hi.” he said.
“Hi.” I replied flirtily.
“Guess what.” he said.
“What?” I asked.
“Well, Good Charlotte are having a concert in Hogsmeade.” he told me.
“Oh. My. Fucking. God!” I screamed. I love GC. They are my favorite band, besides MCR.
“Well…. do you want to go with me?” he asked.
I gasped.
Chapter 3.
AN: STOP FLAMMING DA STORY PREPZ OK! odderwize fangs 2 da goffik ppl 4 da good reveiws! FANGS AGEN RAVEN! oh yeah, BTW I don’t own dis or da lyrics 4 Good Chralotte.
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On the night of the concert I put on my black lace-up boots with high heels. Underneath them were ripped red fishnets. Then I put on a black leather minidress with all this corset stuff on the back and front. I put on matching fishnet on my arms. I straightened my hair and made it look all spiky. I felt a little depressed then, so I slit one of my wrists. I read a depressing book while I waited for it to stop bleeding and I listened to some GC. I painted my nails black and put on TONS of black eyeliner. Then I put on some black lipstick. I didn’t put on foundation because I was pale anyway. I drank some human blood so I was ready to go to the concert.
I went outside. Draco was waiting there in front of his flying car. He was wearing a Simple Plan t-shirt (they would play at the show too), baggy black skater pants, black nail polish and a little eyeliner (AN: A lot fo kewl boiz wer it ok!).
“Hi Draco!” I said in a depressed voice.
“Hi Ebony.” he said back. We walked into his flying black Mercedes-Benz (the license plate said 666) and flew to the place with the concert. On the way we listened excitedly to Good Charlotte and Marilyn Manson. We both smoked cigarettes and drugs. When we got there, we both hopped out of the car. We went to the mosh pit at the front of the stage and jumped up and down as we listened to Good Charlotte.
“You come in cold, you're covered in blood They're all so happy you've arrived The doctor cuts your cord, hands you to your mom She sets you free into this life.” sang Joel (I don’t own da lyrics 2 dat song).
“Joel is so fucking hot.” I said to Draco, pointing to him as he sung, filling the club with his amazing voice.
Suddenly Draco looked sad.
“What’s wrong?” I asked as we moshed to the music. Then I caught on.
“Hey, it’s ok I don’t like him better than YOU!” I said.
“Really?” asked Draco sensitively and he put his arm around me all protective.
“Really.” I said. “Besides I don’t even know Joel and he’s going out with Hilary fucking Duff. I fucking hate that little bitch.” I said disgustedly, thinking of her ugly blonde face.
The night went on really well, and I had a great time. So did Draco. After the concert, we drank some beer and asked Benji and Joel for their autographs and photos with them. We got GC concert tees. Draco and I crawled back into the Mercedes-Benz, but Draco didn’t go back into Hogwarts, instead he drove the car into……………………… the Forbidden Forest!
Chapter 4.
AN: I sed stup flaming ok ebony’s name is ENOBY nut mary su OK! DRACO IS SOO IN LUV wif her dat he is acting defrent! dey nu eechodder b4 ok!
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“DRACO!” I shouted. “What the fuck do you think you are doing?”
Draco didn’t answer but he stopped the flying car and he walked out of it. I walked out of it too, curiously.
“What the fucking hell?” I asked angrily.
“Ebony?” he asked.
“What?” I snapped.
Draco leaned in extra-close and I looked into his gothic red eyes (he was wearing color contacts) which revealed so much depressing sorrow and evilness and then suddenly I didn’t feel mad anymore.
And then…………… suddenly just as I Draco kissed me passionately. Draco climbed on top of me and we started to make out keenly against a tree. He took of my top and I took of his clothes. I even took of my bra. Then he put his thingie into my you-know-what and we did it for the first time.
“Oh! Oh! Oh! ” I screamed. I was beginning to get an orgasm. We started to kiss everywhere and my pale body became all warm. And then….
“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING YOU MOTHERFUKERS!”
It was…………………………………………………….Dumbledore!
Chapter 5.
AN: STOP flaming! if u flam it menz ur a prep or a posr! Da only reson Dumbledeor swor is coz he had a hedache ok an on tup of dat he wuz mad at dem 4 having sexx! PS im nut updating umtil I get five good revoiws!
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Dumbledore made and Draco and I follow him. He kept shouting at us angrily.
“You ludacris fools!” he shouted.
I started to cry tears of blood down my pallid face. Draco comforted me. When we went back to the castle Dumbledore took us to Professor Snape and Professor McGonagall who were both looking very angry.
“They were having sexual intercourse in the Forbidden Forest!” he yelled in a furious voice.
“Why did you do such a thing, you mediocre dunces?” asked Professor McGonagall.
“How dare you?” demanded Professor Snape.
And then Draco shrieked. “BECAUSE I LOVE HER!”
Everyone was quiet. Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall still looked mad but Professor Snape said. “Fine. Very well. You may go up to your rooms.”
Draco and I went upstairs while the teachers glared at us.
“Are you okay, Ebony?” Draco asked me gently.
“Yeah I guess.” I lied. I went to the girl’s dorm and brushed my teeth and my hair and changed into a low-cut black floor-length dress with red lace all around it and black high heels. When I came out….
Draco was standing in front of the bathroom, and he started to sing ‘I just wanna live’ by Good Charlotte. I was so flattered, even though he wasn’t supposed to be there. We hugged and kissed. After that, we said goodnight and he reluctantly went back into his room.
Chapter 6.
AN: shjt up prepz ok! PS I wnot update ubtil u give me goood revows!
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The next day I woke up in my coffin. I put on a black miniskirt that was all ripped around the end and a matching top with red skulls all over it and high heeled boots that were black. I put on two pairs of skull earrings, and two crosses in my ears. I spray-painted my hair with purple.
In the Great Hall, I ate some Count Chocula cereal with blood instead of milk, and a glass of red blood. Suddenly someone bumped into me. All the blood spilled over my top.
“Bastard!” I shouted angrily. I regretted saying it when I looked up cause I was looking into the pale white face of a gothic boy with spiky black hair with red streaks in it. He was wearing so much eyeliner that I was going down his face and he was wearing black lipstick. He didn’t have glasses anymore and now he was wearing red contact lenses just like Draco’s and there was no scar on his forhead anymore. He had a manly stubble on his chin. He had a sexy English accent. He looked exactly like Joel Madden. He was so sexy that my body went all hot when I saw him kind of like an erection only I’m a girl so I didn’t get one you sicko.
“I’m so sorry.” he said in a shy voice.
“That’s all right. What’s your name?” I questioned.
“My name’s Harry Potter, although most people call me Vampire these days.” he grumbled.
“Why?” I exclaimed.
“Because I love the taste of human blood.” he giggled.
“Well, I am a vampire.” I confessed.
“Really?” he whimpered.
“Yeah.” I roared.
We sat down to talk for a while. Then Draco came up behind me and told me he had a surprise for me so I went away with him.
Chapter 7. Bring me 2 life
AN: wel ok u guyz im only writting dis cuz I got 5 god reviuws. n BTW I wont rite da nxt chapter til I git TIN god vons! STO FLAMING OR ILL REPORT U! Evony isn’t a Marie Sue ok she isn’t perfect SHES A SATANITS! n she has problemz shes depressed 4 godz sake!
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Draco and I held our pale white hands with black nail polish as we went upstairs. I was wearing red Satanist sings on my nails in red nail polish (AN: c doez dat sound lik a Maru Sue 2 u?). I waved to Vampire. Dark misery was in his depressed eyes. I guess he was jealous of me that I was going out with Draco. Anyway, I went upstairs excitedly with Draco. We went into his room and locked the door. Then…………
We started frenching passively and we took off each others clothes enthusiastically. He felt me up before I took of my top. Then I took off my black leather bra and he took off his pants. We went on the bed and started making out naked and then he put his boy’s thingy in mine and we HAD SEX. (c is dat stupid?)
“Oh Draco, Draco!” I screamed while getting an orgasm when all of a sudden I saw a tattoo I had never seen before on Draco’s arm. It was a black heart with an arrow through it. On it in bloody gothic writing were the words………… Vampire!
I was so angry.
“You bastard!” I shouted angrily, jumping out of the bed.
“No! No! But you don’t understand!” Draco pleaded. But I knew too much.
“No, you fucking idiot!” I shouted. “You probably have AIDs anyway!”
I put on my clothes all huffily and then stomped out. Draco ran out even though he was naked. He had a really big you-know-what but I was too mad to care. I stomped out and did so until I was in Vampire’s classroom where he was having a lesson with Professor Snape and some other people.
“VAMPIRE POTTER, YOU MOTHERFUCKER!” I yelled.
Chapter 8.
AN: stop flassing ok! if u do den u r a prep!
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Everyone in the class stared at me and then Draco came into the room even though he was naked and started begging me to take him back.
“Ebony, it’s not what you think!” Draco screamed sadly.
My friend B’loody Mary Smith smiled at me understatedly. She flipped her long waste-length gothic black hair and opened her crimson eyes like blood that she was wearing contact lenses on. She had pale white skin that she was wearing white makeup on. Hermione was kidnapped when she was born. Her real parents are vampires and one of them is a witch but Voldemort killed her mother and her father committed suicide because he was depressed about it. She still has nightmares about it and she is very haunted and depressed. It also turns out her real last name is Smith and not Granger. (Since she has converted to Satanism she is in Slytherin now not Griffindoor. )
“What is it that you desire, you ridiculous dimwit!” Snape demeaned angrily in his cold voice but I ignored him.
“Vampire, I can’t believe you cheated on me with Draco!” I shouted at him.
Everyone gasped.
I don’t know why Ebony was so mad at me. I had went out with Vampire (I’m bi and so is Ebony) for a while but then he broke my heart. He dumped me because he liked Britney, a stupid preppy fucker. We were just good friends now. He had gone through horrible problems, and now he was gothic. (Haha, like I would hang out with a prep.)
“But I’m not going out with Draco anymore!” said Vampire.
“Yeah fucking right! Fuck off, you bastard!” I screamed. I ran out of the room and into the Forbidden Forest where I had lost my virility to Draco and then I started to bust into tears.
Chapter 9.
AN: stop flaming ok! I dntn red all da boox! dis is frum da movie ok so itz nut my folt if dumbeldor swers! besuizds I SED HE HAD A HEDACHE! and da reson snap dosent lik harry now is coz hes christian and vampire is a satanist! MCR ROX!
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I was so mad and sad. I couldn’t believe Draco for cheating on me. I began to cry against the tree where I did it with Draco.
Then all of a suddenly, an horrible man with red eyes and no nose and everything started flying towards me on a broomstick! He didn’t have a nose (basically like Voldemort in the movie) and he was wearing all black but it was obvious he wasn’t gothic. It was…… Voldemort!
“No!” I shouted in a scared voice but then Voldemort shouted “Imperius!” and I couldn’t run away.
“Crookshanks!” I shouted at him. Voldemort fell of his broom and started to scream. I felt bad for him even though I’m a sadist so I stopped.
“Ebony.” he yelled. “Thou must kill Vampire Potter!”
I thought about Vampire and his sexah eyes and his gothic black hair and how his face looks just like Joel Madden. I remembered that Draco had said I didn’t understand, so I thought, what if Draco went out with Vampire before I went out with him and they broke up?
“No, Voldemort!” I shouted back.
Voldemort gave me a gun. “No! Please!” I begged.
“Thou must!” he yelled. “If thou does not, then I shall kill thy beloved Draco!”
“How did you know?” I asked in a surprised way.
Voldemort got a dude-ur-so-retarded look on his face. “I hath telekinesis.” he answered cruelly. “And if you doth not kill Vampire, then thou know what will happen to Draco!” he shouted. Then he flew away angrily on his broomstick.
I was so scared and mad I didn’t know what to do. Suddenly Draco came into the woods.
“Draco!” I said. “Hi!”
“Hi.” he said back but his face was all sad. He was wearing white foundation and messy eyeliner kind of like a pentagram (geddit) between Joel Madden and Gerard Way.
“Are you okay?” I asked.
“No.” he answered.
“I’m sorry I got all mad at you but I thought you cheated on me.” I expelled.
“That’s okay.” he said all depressed and we went back into Hogwarts together making out.
Chapter 10.
AN: stup it u gay fags if u donot lik ma story den fukk off! ps it turnz out b’loody mary isn’t a muggle afert al n she n vampire r evil datz y dey movd houses ok!
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I was really scared about Vlodemort all day. I was even upset went to rehearsals with my gothic metal band Bloody Gothic Rose 666. I am the lead singer of it and I play guitar. People say that we sound like a cross between GC, Slipknot and MCR. The other people in the band are B’loody Mary, Vampire, Draco, Ron (although we call him Diabolo now. He has black hair now with blue streaks in it.) and Hargrid. Only today Draco and Vampire were depressed so they weren’t coming and we wrote songs instead. I knew Draco was probably slitting his wrists (he wouldn’t die because he was a vampire too and the only way you can kill a vampire is with a c-r-o-s-s (there’s no way I’m writing that) or a steak) and Vampire was probably watching a depressing movie like The Corpse Bride. I put on a black leather shirt that showed off my boobs and tiny matching miniskirt that said Simple Plan on the butt. You might think I’m a slut but I’m really not.
We were singing a cover of ‘Helena’ and at the end of the song I suddenly bust into tears.
“Ebony! Are you OK?” B’loody Mary asked in a concerted voice.
“What the fuck do you think?” I asked angrily. And then I said. “Well, Voldemort came and the fucking bastard told me to fucking kill Harry! But I don’t want to kill him, because, he’s really nice, even if he did go out with Draco. But if I don’t kill Harry, then Voldemort, will fucking kill Draco!” I burst into tears. Suddenly Draco jumped out from behind a wall.
“Why didn’t you fucking tell me!” he shouted. “How could you- you- you fucking poser muggle bitch!” (c is dat out of character?)
I started to cry and cry. Draco started to cry too all sensitive. Then he ran out crying.
We practiced for one more hour. Then suddenly Dumbeldore walked in angrily! His eyes were all fiery and I knew this time it wasn’t cause he had a headache.
“What have you done!” He started to cry wisely. (c dats basically nut swering and dis time he wuz relly upset n u wil c y) “Ebony Draco has been found in his room. He committed suicide by slitting his wrists.”
Chapter 11.
AN: i sed stup flaming up prepz! c if dis chaptr is srupid!1111 it delz wit rly sris issus! sp c 4 urself if itz ztupid brw fangz 2 ma frend raven 4 hleping me!
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“NO!” I screamed. I was horrorfied! B’loody Mary tried to comfort me but I told her fuck off and I ran to my room crying myself. Dumbledore chased after me shouting but he had to stop when I went into my room cause he would look like a perv that way.
Anyway, I started crying tears of blood and then I slit both of my wrists. They got all over my clothes so I took them off and jumped into the bath angrily while I put on a Linkin Park song at full volume. I grabbed a steak and almost stuck it into my heart to commit suicide. I was so fucking depressed! I got out of the bathtub and put on a black low-cut dress with lace all over it sandly. I put on black high heels with pink metal stuff on the ends and six pairs of skull earrings. I couldn’t fucking believe it. Then I looked out the window and screamed… Snap was spying on me and he was taking a video tape of me! And Loopin was masticating to it! They were sitting on their broomsticks.
“EW, YOU FUCKING PERVS, STOP LOOKING AT ME NAKED! ARE YOU PEDOS OR WHAT!” I screamed putting on a black towel with a picture of Marilyn Mason on it. Suddenly Vampire ran in.
“Abra Kedavra!” he yelled at Snape and Loopin pointing his womb. I took my gun and shot Snape and Loopin a gazillion times and they both started screaming and the camera broke. Suddenly, Dumblydore ran in. “Ebony, it has been revealed that someone has - NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” he shouted looking at Snape and Loopin and then he waved his wand and suddenly…
Hargrid ran outside on his broom and said everyone we need to talk.
“What do you know, Hargrid? You’re just a little Hogwarts student!”
“I MAY BE A HOGWARTS STUDENT….” Hargirid paused angrily. “BUT I AM ALSO A SATANIST!”
“This cannot be.” Snap said in a crisp voice as blood dripped from his hand where Dumblydore’s wand had shot him. “There must be other factors.”
“YOU DON’T HAVE ANY!” I yelled in madly.
Loopin held up the camera triumelephantly. “The lens may be ruined but the tape is still there!”
I felt faint, more than I normally do like how it feels when you do not drink enough blood.
“Why are you doing this?” Loopin said angrily while he rubbed his dirty hands on his clook.
And then I heard the words that I had heard before but not from him. I did not know whether to feel shocked and happy or to bite him and drink his blood because I felt faint.
“BECAUSE…BECAUSE….” Hargid said and he paused in the air dramitaclly, waving his wand in the air. Then swooped he in singing to the tune of a gothic version of a song by 50 Cent.
“Because you’re goffic?” Snap asked in a little afraid voice cause he was afraind it meant he was connected with Satan.
“Because I LOVE HER!”
Chapter 12.
AN: stop f,aing ok hargrid is a pedo 2 a lot of ppl in amerikan skoolz r lik dat I wunted 2 adres da ishu! how du u no snap iant kristian plus hargrid isn’t really in luv wif ebony dat was sedric ok!
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I was about to slit my wrists again with the silver knife that Drago had given me in case anything happened to him. He had told me to use it valiantly against an enemy but I knew that we must both go together.
“NO!” I THOUGHT IT WAS HAIRgrid but it was Vampire. He started to scream. “OMFG! NOOOOO! MY SCAR HURTS!” and then….. his eyes rolled up! You could only see his red whites.
I stopped. “How did u know?”
“I saw it! And my scar turned back into the lightning bolt!”
“NO!” I ran up closer. “I thought you didn’t have a scar anymore!” I shouted.
“I do but Diabolo changed it into a pentagram for me and I always cover it up with foundation.” he said back. “Anyway my scar hurt and it turned back into the lightning bolt! Save me! then I had a vision of what was happening to Draco…………….Volfemort has him bondage!”
Anyway I was in the school nurse’s office now recovering from my slit wrists. Snap and Loopin and HAHRID were there too. They were going to St. Mango’s after they recovered cause they were pedofiles and you can’t have those fucking pervs teaching in a school with lots of hot gurlz. Dumbledore had constipated the cideo camera they took of me naked. I put up my middle finger at them.
Anyway Hargrid came into my hospital bed holding a bouquet of pink roses.
“Enoby I need to tell u somethnig.” he said in a v. serious voice, giving me the roses.
“Fuck off.” I told him. “You know I fucking hate the color pink anyway, and I don’t like fucked up preps like you.” I snapped. Hargrid had been mean to me before for being gottik.
“No Enoby.” Hargrid says. “Those are not roses.”
“What, are they goffs too you poser prep?” I asked cause I was angry that he had brought me pink roses.
“I saved your life!” He yelled angrily. “No you didn’t I replied.” “You saved me from getting a Paris Hilton p- video made from your shower scene and being vued by Snap and Loopin.” Who MASTABATED (c is dat speld rong) to it he added silently.
“Whatever!” I yelled angirly.
He pointed his wand at the pink roses. “These aren’t roses.” He suddenly looked at them with an evil look in his eye and muttered Well If you wanted Honesty that’s all you haD TO SAY! .
“That’s not a spell that’s an MCR song.” I corrected him wisely.
“I know, I was just warming up my vocal cordes.” Then he screamed. “Petulus merengo mi kremicli romacio(4 all u cool goffic mcr fans out, there, that is a tribute! specially for raven I love you girl!)imo noto okayo!”
And then the roses turned into a huge black flame floating in the middle of the air. And it was black. Now I knew he wasn’t a prep.
“OK I believe you now wtf is Drako?”
Hairgrid rolled his eyes. I looked into the balls of flame but I could c nothing.
“U c, Enobby,” Dumblydore said, watching the two of us watching the flame. “2 c wht iz n da flmes(HAHA U REVIEWRS FLAMES GEDDIT) u mst find urslf 1st, k?”
“I HAVE FOUND MYSELF OK YOU MEAN OLD MAN!” Hargrid yelled. dUMBLydore lookd shockd. I guess he didn’t have a headache or else he would have said something back.
Hairgrid stormed off back into his bed. “U r a liar, prof dumbledoree!”
Anyway when I got better I went upstairs and put on a black leather minidress that was all ripped on the ends with lace on it. There was some corset stuff on the front. Then I put on black fishnets and black high-heeled boots with pictures of Billie Joe Armstrong on them. I put my hair all out around me so I looked like Samara from the Ring (if u don’t know who she iz ur a prep so fuk off!) and I put on blood-red lipstick, black eyeliner and black lip gloss.
“You look kawai, girl.” B’loody Mary said sadly. “Fangs (geddit) you do too.” I said sadly too, but I was still upset. I slit both of my wrists feeling totally depressed and I sucked all the blood. I cried again in my bathroom and put the shades on so Snap and Loopin couldn’t spy on me this time. I went to some classes. Vampire was in the Hair of Magical Magic Creatures. He looked all depressed because Draco had disappeared and he had used to be in love with Draco. He was sucking some blood from a Hufflepuff.
“Hi.” he said in a depressed way. “Hi back.” I said in an wqually said way.
We both looked at each other for some time. Harry had beautiful red gothic eyes so much like Dracos. Then……… we jumped on each other and started screwing each other.
“STOP IT NOW YOU HORNY SIMPLETONS!” shouted Professor McGoggle who was watching us and so was everyone else.
“Vampire you fucker!” I said slapping him. “Stop trying to screw me. You know I loved Draco!” I shouted and then I ran away angrily.
Just then he started to scream. “OMFG! NOOOOO! MY SCAR HURTS!” and then….. his eyes rolled up! You could only see his red whites.
“NO!” I ran up closer.
“I thought you didn’t have a scar anymore!” I shouted.
“I do but Diabolo changed it into a pentagram for me and I always cover it up with foundation.” he said back. “Anyway my scar hurt and then I had a vision of what was happening to Draco…………….Volfemort has him bondage!”
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SPECIAL FANGZ 2 RAVEN MY GOFFIX BLOOD SISTA WTF UR SUPPOZD 2 RIT DIS!11111111
HEY RAVEN DO U KNOW WHERE MY SWEATER I
Chapter 13.
AN: raven fangz 4 gelpin me agen im sory ah tok ur postr of gerard but dat guy is such a fokin sexbom! PREPZ STOP FLAMIGNG!
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Vampire and I ran up the stairs looking for Dumbledore. We were so scared.
“Dumbledore Dumblydore!” we both yelled. Dumbledore came there.
“What is it that you want now you despicable snobs?” he asked angrily.
“Volsemort has Draco!” we shouted at the same time.
He laughed in an evil voice.
“No! Don’t! We need to save Draco!” we begged.
“No.” he said meanly. “I don’t give a darn what Voldemort does to Draco. Not after how much he misbehaved in school especially with YOU Ebony.” he said while he frowned looking at me. “Besides I never liked him that much anyway.” then he walked away. Vampire started crying. “My Draco!” he moaned. (AN: don’t u fik gay guyz r lik so hot!)
“Its okay!” I tried to tell him but that didn’t stop him. He started to cry tears of blood. Then he had a brainstorm. “I had an idea!” he exclaimed.
“What?” I asked him.
“You’ll see.” he said. He took out his wand and did a spell. Then…… suddenly we were in Voldemprt’s lair!
We ran in with our wands out just as we heard a croon voice say. “Allah Kedavra!” It was……………………………….. Voldemort!
Chapter 14.
AN: fuk off PREPZ ok! Raven fangz 4 helpin agen. im sory ah kudnt update but I wuz derperessd n I had 2 go 2 da hospital kuz I slit muh rists. PS im nut updating til u giv me 10 god revoiws!
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WARNING: SUM OF DIS CHAPTA IS XTREMLY SCRAY. VIOWER EXCRETION ADVISD.
We ran to where Volcemort was. It turned out that Voldemort wasn’t there. Instead the fat guy who killed Cedric was. Draco was there crying tears of blood. Snaketail was torturing him. Vampire and I ran in front of Snaketail.
“Rid my sight you despicable preps!” he shouted as we started shooting him with the gun he Then suddenly he looked at me and he fell down with a lovey-dovey look in his eyes. “EbonyIloveyouwiluhavesexwithme.” he said. (in dis he is sixteen yrs old so hes not a pedofile ok)
“Huh?” I asked. ”Enoby I love you will you have sex with me?” asked Snaketail. I started laughing crudely. “What the fuck? You torture my bf and then you expect me to fuck you? God, you are so fucked up you fucking bastard.” I said angrily. Then I stabbed him in the heart. Blood pored out of it like a fountain.
“Nooooooooooooo!” he screamed. He started screaming and running around. Then he fell down and died. I brust into tears sadly.
“Snaketail what art thou doing?” called Voldemort. Then…… he started coming! We could hear his high heels clacking to us. So we got on our broomsticks and we flew to Hogwarts. We went to my room. Vampire went away. There I started crying.
“What’s wrong honey?” asked Draco taking off his clothes so we could screw. He had a sex-pack (geddit cuz hes so sexah) and a really huge you-know-what and everything.
“Its so unfair!” I yielded. “Why can’t I just be ugly or plain like all da other girls and preps here except for B’loody Mary, because she’s not ugly or anything.”
“Why would you wanna be ugly? I don’t like the preps anyway. They are such fucking sluts.” answered Draco.
“Yeah but everyone is in love with me! Like Snape and Loopin took a video of me naked. Hargrid says he’s in love with me. Vampire likes me and now even Snaketail is in love with me! I just wanna be with you ok Draco! Why couldn’t Satan have made me less beautiful?” I shouted angrily. (an” don’t wory enoby isn’t a snob or anyfing but a lot of ppl hav told her shes pretty) “Im good at too many things! WHY CAN’T I JUST BE NORMAL? IT’S A FUCKING CURSE!” I shouted and then I ran away.
Chapter 15.
AN: stup flaming ok! btw u suk frum no on evry tim sum1 flams me im gona slit muh ristsz! fangz 2 raven 4 hlpein!
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“Ebony Ebony!” shouted Draco sadly. “No, please, come back!”
But I was too mad.
“Whatever! Now u can go anh have sex with Vampire!” I shouted. I stormed into my room and closed my black door with my blood-red key. It had a picture of Marylin Manson on it. He looked so sexy in a way that reminded me of Draco and Vampire. I started to cry and weep. I took a razor and started to slit my wrists. I drank the blood all depressed. Then I looked at my black GC watch and noticed it was time to go to Biology class.
I put on a short ripped black gothic dress that said Anarchy on the front in blood red letters and was all ripped and a spiky belt. Under that I put on ripped black fishnets and boots that said Joel all over them with blood red letters. I put my ebony black hair out. Anyway I went downstairs feeling all sad and depressed as usual. I did sum advanced Biology work. I was turning a bloody pentagram into a black guitar. Suddenly the guitar turned to Draco!
“Enoby I love you!” he shouted sadly. “I dnot care what those fucker preps and posers fink. Ur da most beautiful girl in the world. Before I met you I used to want to commit suicide all the time. Now I just wanna fucking be with you. I fucking love you!.” Then……………. he started to sing “Da Chronicles of Life and Death” (we considered it our song now cuz we fell in love when Joel was singing it) right in front of the entire class! His singing voice was so amazing and gothic and sexxy like a cross between Gerard, Joel, Chester, Pierre and Marilyn Manson (AN: don’t u fink dos guyz r so hot. if u dnot no who dey r get da fuk out od hr!) .
“OMFG.” I said after he was finished. Some fucking preps stared at us but I just stuck up my middle fingers (that were covered in black nail polish and were entwined with Draco’s now) at them. “I love you!” I said and then we started to kiss just like Hilary Duff (i fukin h8 dat bitch) and CMM in a Cinderella Story. Then we went away holding hands. Loopin shouted at us but he stopped cuz everyone was clapping by how sexy we looked 2gether. Then I saw a poster saying that MCR would have a concert in Hogsmede right then. We looked at each other all shocked and then we went 2gether. Chapter 16.
AN: u no wut! sut up ok! proov 2 me ur nut prepz! raven u suk u fuken bich gimme bak mah fukijn swteet ur supsd 2 rit dis! Raven wtf u bich ur suposd to dodis! BTW fangz 2 britney5655 4 techin muh japnese!
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We ran happily to Hogsmede. There we saw the stage where GC had played. We ran in happly. MCR were there playing ‘Helena’. I was so fucking happy! Gerard looked even sexier than he did in da pictures. Even Draco thought so, I could totally see him getting an erection but it didn’t matter cuz I knew know that we were da only true ones for eachother. I was wearing a black leather minidress and black leather platinum boots with red ripped fishnets. Draco was wearing a black baggy MCR t-shirt and black baggy pants. Anyway, we stated moshing to Helena. We frenched. We ran up 2 the front of the band to stage-dive. Suddenly, Gerard pulled off his mask. So did the others. We gasped. It wasn’t them at all. It was.,……………………….. Volsemort and da Death Dealers!
“Wtf Draco im not going to a concert wid u!” I shouted angrily. “Not after what happened to me last time? Even if its MCR n u no how much I lik them”
“What cause we…you know…” he gadgetted uncomfortbli cause guys don’t like to talk a bout you-know-what.
“Yeah cause we you know!” I yielded in an angry voice.
“We won’t do that again.” Draco promised. “This time, we’re going with an ESCORT.”
“OMFG wtf/ Are you giving into the mainstream?” I asked. “So I guess ur a prep or a Christina or what now?”
“NO.” he muttered loudly.
“R u becoming a prep or what?” I shootd angrily.
“Enoby! I’m not! Pls come with me!” He fell down to his knees and started singing ‘Da world is black’ by GC to me.
I was flattened cause that’s not even a single, he had memorized da lyrks just 4 me!
“OK then I guess I will have to.” I said and then we frenched 4 a while and I went up 2 my room.
B’loody Mary was standing there. “Hajimemashite gurl.” she said happily (she spex Japanese so do i. dat menz ‘how do u do’ in japanese). “BTW Willow that fucking poser got expuld. she failed al her klasses and she skepped math.” (an: RAVEN U FUKIN SUK! FUK U!)
“It serves that fuking bich right.” I laughed angrily.
Well anyway we where felling all deprezzed. We wutsched some goffic movies like Das niteMARE b4 xmas. “Maybe Willow will die too.” I said.
“Kawai.” B’loody Mair shook her head enrgtically lethrigcly. “Oh yeah o have a confession after she got expuld I murdered her and den loopin did it with her cause he’s a necphilak.”
“Kawai.” I commnted happily . We talked to each other in silence for da rest uv da movie.
“OH HEY BTw, im going to a concert with drako tonight in Hogsmeade with mcr.” I sed. “ I need to wear like da hotset outfit EVA.”
B’Loody Mairy Nodded ENREGeticALLlY. “Omfg totally lets go shopping.”
“In Hot Topic, right?” I asked, already getting out my spshcial Hot Topic Loiyalty carde.
“No.” My head snaped up.
‘WHAT?” my head spuin. I could not believe it. “B’Loody Mary are u a PREP?”
“NOOOO!NOOOO!” She laughed. “I found some cool goffic stores near Hogwarts that’s all.”
“Hu told u abut them” I askd sure it would be Drako or Diabolo or Vampire(don’t even SAY that nam to me!). Or me.
“Dumblydore.” She sed. “Let me just call our broms.”
“OMFFG DUMBLYDORE?” I asked quietly.
“Yah I saw the map for Hogsmeade on his desk.” She told me. “Come on let’s go.”
We were going in a few punkgoff stores SPECIALLY for the concerts in Hogsmeade. The salesperson was OMG HOTTER THAN GERARD EXCEPT NOT CAUSE THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE and he gave me a few dresses. “We only have these for da real goffs.”
“Da real goffs?” Me and B’Loody Mary asked.
“Yah u wouldn’t believe how many posers ther are in this town man! Yesterday loopin and snap tried to buy a goffic camera pouch.” He shook his head. “I dint even no they had a camera.”
“OMFG NO THEIR GONNA SPY ON ME AGAIN!” I cried, running out of the changing room wearing a long black dress with lots of red tulle coming out and very low-cut with a huge slit.
“Oh my satan you have to buy that outfit” The salesperson said.
“Yeah it looks totlly hot.” said B’Loody Mary.
“You know what I am gona give it to you free cause u look really hot in that utfit. Hey are you gonna be at the concert tonight?” he asked.
“Yeah I am actually.” I looked back at him. “Hey BTW my name’s ebondy dark’ness dementia TARA way what’s yours?”
“Tom Rid.” He said and ran a hand through his black-dyed hair. “maybe I’ll see you there tonight.”
“Yeah I don’t think so cause I am going there with my bf drako you sick perv!” I yelled angrily, but before he could beg me to go with him, Hargrid flew in on his black broom looking worried. “OMFG EBONDY U NEED OT GET BACK INTO THE CASTLE NOW!”
huh. my immortal is shorter than i remember
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shyneanon · 4 years ago
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So I posted this earlier...
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... And then I wrote it because of course I did.
My interpretation of MF Sans and Paps is based off of @improvidence318​, who I tagged so you have an instant link to his VA stuff because his audios are hilarious and his MF Sans voice is super sexy. Sorry for the notification, improvidence, I just want ppl to hear your stuff >~< His audios were the first introduction I had to MF Sans and his interpretation is my favorite. (Although the guy does need to learn to not corner women in dark alleys in an attempt to bed them.)
Anyway yeah I thought the power dynamic would be less off if Reader was involved with the mob too. So.
---
When you arrived at the party, you put a smile on your face. It was as much an accessory as the necklace you were wearing. You weren’t even quite sure what the party was for. A successful business endeavor between multiple crime families, you knew that, but your father never really liked to tell you the details of said endeavors.
Your parents didn’t force you to stay at their side, so you allowed yourself to wander and pay attention to… anything but the people here. The art on the walls, the decor… Anything but them. You knew your parents were bringing you along to these parties to find a potential husband, but you couldn’t bring yourself to go start a conversation with anyone. You didn’t want anything to do with them. You hated the criminal lifestyle-- you wanted to marry out of it, not into it. So when you realized there was a large terrace, you gladly ran out, to get away from the stifling air of false smiles, veiled threats and blatant lies.
The air outside was much fresher and crisper, and the terrace gave you a nice view of the city. This was so much better. You even felt a smile creep onto your face as you removed your gloves.
Sometimes, when you watched movies or read books about young women your age, you wondered if their freedom was exaggerated. Or if the goodness of the men they met was exaggerated. Probably, to an extent. After all, nothing that makes money is entirely honest. You’d learned that very early on. But you always wondered what it felt like to go to a gathering of friends and not feel the underlying tension that you always felt. In your world, everyone looked out for themselves. You knew the people at this party would gladly blow each other’s brains out if they knew they could gain something from it. Sure, they had their ethics and their deals and their values, but those could easily be bent and twisted to justify almost anything they did.
You envied those girls. They didn’t have the money your family had, but they had real friends. Real loved ones. Real men who really cared about them.
You didn’t think of yourself as a romantic, but you knew you would have to get married eventually. If only you could find someone who would actually love you, even in this hellhole.
The doors to the terrace were thrown open behind you, but you didn’t so much as start. You were accustomed to loud noises.
“Fuckin’ need a smoke, this party is a buncha bullshit.”
Ugh. Great. This had been your one place of refuge and now some drunken idiot had stumbled into it. You looked over to see who exactly had barged in on your retreat.
You blinked when you realized how large he was, and again when you realized he wasn’t human. His hands were lighting a cigar, and you could tell that they were nothing but bone. A monster. You’d met monsters before, so you weren’t afraid (at least, not for that reason), but you had never seen a skeleton before. He didn’t even seem to realize you were here, since he had headed for the other end of the terrace. You were much smaller than him, so you were sure his eyes had looked you over easily. If he had eyes. You couldn’t quite see his face, the brim of his hat was hiding it.
He was still grumbling to himself as he tucked his lighter back into his pocket and placed his cigar between two sets of extremely sharp teeth. From the way the moonlight glinted off one tooth, you could tell it was made of metal. Probably gold. He didn’t have eyes, per se, but he had little lights in his eye sockets that glowed a crimson color.
You realized that those lights were now looking directly at you.
“Oh, shit, how long’ve you been here for?” asked the stranger. He had an extremely deep voice that almost seemed to roll through the air, like thunder.
Well, he wasn’t saying anything mean, but if he was at this party he was no good, so you started to put on your gloves again. “Longer than you.”
For some reason, he chuckled. “Woulda been out here sooner if I knew this terrace was here. This party’s the worst, right?”
You had been turning to go, but you stopped. He wasn’t supposed to say that-- that the party wasn’t fun. That would be rude. But he hadn’t cared. Maybe he had an unrefined reason for thinking it was unpleasant. Maybe he just wanted more booze, or wished there were strippers here... but whatever it was, he hadn’t given you some garbage excuse for being out here with you.
You decided to test the waters. “It’s…  not fun.”
“Boy, you sure are polite about it.” He snorted (odd, considering he didn’t have lungs). “Everybody’s so goddamn fake ‘round here. Can’t have any real fun.” He smiled, raising a brow. “What’s yer name, dollface?”
You told him. You expected him to bring up your father, but he didn’t.
“Nice. Name’s Sans.”
Oh. You’d heard of him. “You have a brother,” you said, “right?”
“Yeah. Real buzzkill, though. He’s still inside, chattin’ people up.” His toothy grin widened. “Fancies himself a real ladykiller.”
“Literally or figuratively?” you asked with a small smile. Sans let out a laugh.
“Nah, figuratively. He’d never lay a hand on a lady. ‘N neither would I.”
They all say that.
“Unless… you want me to lay hands on ya.”
You blinked. His eyes were lidded. Did he not know who your father was? He could have him shot dead for talking to you like this. Then again, this man didn’t seem to have the highest IQ.
“You look real nice in that dress,” he said softly.
“Thanks,” you said curtly. You didn’t want to turn around and go back into the party-- you hated it there-- and you figured Sans wouldn’t let it escalate much further. He was a monster, not a human skeleton. He could still die if your father ordered it.
Wait, when had he gotten right in front of you?
“Y’know,” he said in his baritone voice, “nobody’s lookin’ for ya. Seems like we’ll be alone for a while.”
“Are you suggesting something?” you responded, trying to look unfazed. You were fazed, though. Most men were too scared to try anything like this on you. And for good reason. It could get them killed. And this man was just so… big. You had to crane your neck to meet his gaze.
“Maybe.”
He leaned close to you, and you frowned.
“Your breath smells like alcohol and cigar smoke,” you told him. Gross. Like you’d want to get intimate with him anyway, much less with his mouth smelling like that.
That didn’t deter him. “Yeah? Sorry about that.”
His head was practically in the crook of your neck now. He inhaled sharply.
“You smell good,” he growled, like a wolf smelling a helpless bunny.
You realized you were leaning against the railing of the terrace and that his hands were grabbing the railing on either side of you. This would absolutely horrify your parents.
Hmm.
It would horrify my parents.
Maybe… just to spite them…
You stepped a little closer to Sans, who immediately wrapped an arm around your waist. You resisted the slight urge to move away.
“Ah, dollface,” Sans purred. “You smell so good…. I could just eat ya….”
His sharp teeth started to trail along your neck. Was this a kiss? He didn’t have lips, so you weren’t sure.
“Maybe,” he said softly, “you an’ I could get away from this awful party… An’ I could show ya a good time elsewhere….”
He can’t be serious. You squinted. “Get away? We can’t just walk out the door.”
“Don’t have to,” he responded; he was so close your nose was brushing against his nasal bone. He smirked. “I can show ya how, if you want me to.”
You were curious… But unfortunately, you assumed that if you said yes,  he would also take that as a yes to the sex he was obviously proposing. And you definitely didn’t want that. How would you even…? No, you didn’t even want to know.
He pressed his teeth right against the corner of your mouth. Definitely a kiss. You felt annoyed when your face got hot.
“C’mon, doll.” He already sounded excited. “I can show ya all kinds of new things--”
“SANS! WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU DOING?!”
He immediately backed away from you at the sound of the more shrill voice. You could feel that your face was on fire. Whoever it was probably thought you had been happily reciprocating….
You looked over to see a second skeleton, somehow taller than the first, but a lot thinner. He had some sort of scar across his left eye. Your cynicism returned (strange, it was like time-- and your brain-- had slowed down a few moments ago) and you had to wonder what sour business deal he’d gotten that mark from.
He was glowering at Sans. This had to be his brother. Papyrus was his name, right? Like the parchment the ancient Egyptians used to write on.
“Uh,” was all that came out of Sans’ mouth. So eloquent. You actually felt kind of ashamed you’d let someone with his low level of intelligence go as far as he had. And just to spite your parents? What were you, five?
“DO YOU KNOW WHOSE DAUGHTER SHE IS?”
Sans looked over at you. “I mean, no.” He grinned with those sharp teeth again. “I only care ‘bout who she calls Daddy.”
Your face got hot again... which embarrassed you… which only made your face hotter.
“THE POOR THING!” said Papyrus. “YOU’VE ABSOLUTELY TERRIFIED HER!”
“That’s embarrassment yer lookin’ at, Paps, not fear.” His tone darkened a little. “We’ve both seen fear.”
Nobody said things like that either. Not at a gathering like this, and definitely not in front of women. You were pretty sure his disregard for the etiquette of this society was just due to sheer stupidity, but it was refreshing. As thick as he was, he was at least honest.
Well, not really. Just more honest than everyone else here. Surely he had some skeletons in his closet as well.
Hah… skeletons in his closet. You tried to fight back a smile. Unfortunately, it was noticed by both brothers.
Sans sounded amused. “Whatcha laughin’ at, babe?”
“Nothing,” you said, but since you couldn’t bite your lip your smile was fully visible.
“Like hell. What’s so funny?”
“SANS!” said Papyrus. “LANGUAGE!”
You said, “It might offend you.” The last thing you wanted to do was offend a mobster of any sort. Even if you were basically untouchable.
“S’long as you ain’t callin’ me fat, we’re good.” He winked. “I ain’t fat, I’m just big-boned.”
Your smile widened, much to your chagrin.
“SANS!”
“What? She likes it. Now tell me your joke, honey.”
You still weren’t sure if this was a good idea, but he’d asked. “I was just thinking that you both have some… skeletons in your closet.” With an embarrassed smile-- Sans’ grin was contagious-- you softly tapped your fingers against the air and said, “Ba-dum tsssss.”
Papyrus looked aghast, but Sans beamed and started to laugh.
“God, sweetheart, yer the only person at this party who’s any real fun.” He put his hand on your shoulder, though it was in a friendly manner. “Everybody else here has a stick up their ass!”
Papyrus didn’t even yell for him to shut up. It was too late, Sans’ voice had a way of reverberating throughout the room and everyone had heard. They were all staring at the three of you. Everything was quiet. You realized that even you were horrified; your hands were over your mouth. Or maybe it was secondhand embarrassment.
For some reason, Sans didn’t quit laughing, even when there was no way he couldn’t have noticed everyone else watching. In fact… Was he laughing harder now that people were staring? Papyrus looked like he wanted to murder his brother right there on the spot, but he did his best to save face.
“I… I APOLOGIZE FOR MY BROTHER’S BEHAVIOR, HE IS VERY, VERY DRUNK.”
Yeah, right. Sans wasn’t even wobbling on his feet, at most he was a bit tipsy.
Papyrus put his hand on your shoulder, the one Sans hadn’t touched. “I’M SORRY IF HE BOTHERED YOU AT ALL.”
Sans was horrible, and a complete moron, but… you liked him? For some reason. So you said, “Oh no, he didn’t. He was a gentleman.”
Papyrus obviously didn’t believe it, but he looked relieved that you had said so. “WELL, GOOD! AT LEAST HE WAS TREATING YOU WELL! HE IS ALWAYS… SO NICE TO LADIES.”
You bit your lip to keep from laughing at Papyrus’ exasperation.
You felt a hand on your arm-- a human one-- and your mother pulled you back away from the brothers.
“You’re sure he was nice to you?” she asked.
Well, you were already lying-- and it was kind of funny-- so you decided you may as well commit. “He was really nice to me. He told me I looked beautiful and he lent me his jacket so that I could keep warm.” You stopped yourself there, before you went too far and made him out to be Prince Charming himself. You glanced over and saw that Papyrus had a brow raised in confusion, while Sans had a brow raised in interest.
“I should hope he did.”
That was your father. Oh boy. Even Papyrus looked nervous. Sans seemed to recognize that you were saving his ass, because while you suspected he didn’t care, he looked like he did.
“You have a wonderful daughter, sir.” He beamed. “Smart ‘n funny.”
He was lucky he’d appealed to your father correctly. He always told you that you were smart, so anyone who said the same thing immediately gained at least some respect from him.
“Very,” was all your father said in response.
Papyrus stammered, “I… I SHOULD TAKE MY BROTHER HOME, BEFORE HIS VERY INEBRIATED STATE DOES ANYONE ANY MORE HARM.”
“Good idea,” said Sans. “After one last drink.”
“NO!”
Papyrus grabbed Sans by the back of his shirt, like a mother cat picking up its kitten, and started to drag him off. Sans gave you one last smile.
“Nice meetin’ ya, sweetheart. Hope I see ya again.”
You waved a little, trying to look as innocent as possible with your parents there. You bit the insides of your cheeks to keep from smiling too wide.
“His poor brother,” said your mother. Well, at least she didn’t hate both of them. “I can’t imagine having to take care of a grown man.” A smile. “Oh, wait. I already do that.”
Your father snorted. “Ha, ha.” He smiled at you. “Sorry about that, Princess. When we said we wanted you to meet men we did not mean him.”
A small pang of worry came over you. “You’re… not going to hurt him, right? He was nice to me.” You’d lied for a reason. Sans was an idiot, but he seemed like a pretty harmless idiot in the end. Or, harmless for a mobster, anyway.
Right?
“You mean it?” said your father.
“Yes, absolutely.” He hadn’t been mean. Just… very forward.
“Alright. I won’t hurt him, then.”
Your mother gestured further inside. “Come with us. We met a very nice young man who thought you sounded wonderful.”
Immediately, you felt your mood sour again. “Right.”
As they led you across the room, you found yourself already wishing that the brothers were still here.
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wellbafineline · 4 years ago
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could you write some Harry fluff about Harry comforting the reader after she struggles with body insecurity?
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A/N - I hope i did this justice, i tried not to dive too deep into body image as ik it can be triggering for some ppl, and i also didn't want to get it completely wrong bc i know one person's experience / feelings aren't universal, so this is more along the lines of the press body shaming the reader and h comforting her, hope this is still okay tho!! tysm for the request!
And a side note, thank you so much for kind words, likes and reblogs on my first piece of writing, it means a lot !!<3
side , side note this is not proofread so i apologise for the extra long sentences or if some things are a bit roughly worded lol.
You were aware of Harry's exes, you couldn't really not be they were some of the world's biggest supermodels, it's just you wish you could, you were just going to read the one article that your best friend had sent to you about you and harry when you went out to dinner. the original purpose of her sending it was to say how hot you looked, it was when harry had taken you out for your 6 month anniversary dinner, but a couple of sly facebook comments and the suggested stories tab had made for good tools to help your spiral. 
It wasn't explicitly written neither in the articles or comments, but the message was clear.
‘Out of everyone he could get why would he choose ,,, her’
Or ‘do you think this was a pity date, no way she's actually his girlfriend’, and a multitude of a lot more upfront comments about how you're not harrys ‘usual type’ so there's not a chance you're actually together.
You knew that you were by no means a supermodel, but you’d never felt this unattractive, or at least not for a while. Of course it's an insecurity, Harry could get any person he wanted but he chose you, and you don't like to dwell on the why for too long, but now it was eating you up.
Looking them up, you were different in every way to Harry's previous relationships, it made sense that the media would compare you, but did he?
Your thought was interrupted by the thump of Harry's shoes and bag hitting the hallway floor.
‘Babe, you here? Got takeaway on the way home, save us cooking, the chinese you wanted to try.’ he called out to you making his way to the kitchen.
You sighed and got up to follow him, meeting him at the island where he's now plating the food and giving him a peck on the cheek.
Harry turns to you looking for a moment before you meet his eyes, ‘y’alright?, normally nearly jump me when i'm home early and bring food’ 
Moving to sit on the counter, opposed to leaning against it with Harry looking down at you. You debate not telling him, just saying unis stressful and you've got an assignment due on monday, and dealing with it by yourself, having a cry when you get back to your flat and it'd be done with, he'd never have to know it bothers you. Only he knows there's no assignment and he also knows you pretty well to see through the white lies. 
Harry moves rubbing up and down your thigh as you begin to tell him,
‘‘Just saw some stuff online, got sent some of the pictures of us out to dinner last week and they came with some lovely comments about me, and you and us, and why you'd choose me’ you can feel yourself rambling at this point but you can't help it the jar was open now, ‘how, you could really have anyone in the world you wanted, which you could y’know, you're harry styles and apparently, according to most of the internet im not worthy, and i know i'm not a supermodel so you don't have to feel bad and tell me i am i just need to get it out of my system so im not stressing all week about everything’
Harry, who looks clearly shocked by your sudden explosion and also like he's about to cry at the same time, suddenly crushes you into a tight hug.
‘Y’know i dont give a shit what them gossip rags say about us don't you? That even if what you said is true and I could have anyone, I'd still want you.’ He’s moved back slightly, now looking at you so intensely with utter determination to expel these thoughts from your head. You nod weakly as he carries on ‘there's a reason that they’re exes, you're who i want, and don't know about you but this is the best relationship i've had, so who gives a fuck what people on facebook or whatever say.’ 
He helps you down for another bone crushing hug, until he hears you breathing start to even out and pulls back to smile at you, which you return, his fingers moving to your cheeks to make you smile comically big.
‘There she is! That's what i like to see!, now Chinese?’
You just nod and let him lead you into the living room with your plates ready to spend all weekend with each other and to never read another tabloid again.
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eohachu · 4 years ago
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Post pictures of your first ever (fictional/celeb) crush to the latest one and tag five others to continue the game.
Ali tagged me, thanks. I guess 😘 @lanzhansmiles​
A’ight so I’m simply taking this as an opportunity to show off my frankly impeccable taste 😌 *coughs into the crook of my elbow with my mask on and from a safe distance* More under the cut, godspeed!
I’m tagging uhh I really don’t want to expose anyone but uh. @morifinwes​ @ttaechwita​ @sunshine304​ @treemaidengeek​ @flamingwell​ no pressure tho!!
Since 2006
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Janina Fautz: Die Wilden Kerle, anyone?? Tbh i had a crush on quite a lot of the characters/actors but in hindsight Janina was and is the most influential one. Also probably my first ever girl crush (again, in hindsight bc it took me until 3 years ago to finally find out i’m queer lol)
Eva-Maria May: Yeah well I’m not gonna talk about where I know her from let’s say it was an incredibly bad soap opera my mom used to watch. She was one of the reasons why I went Yeah I Have Always Been Into Girls. I was pretty obsessed with her to the point where mini me secretly printed out a photo of her to look at lmaooo the signs have always been there and it’s truly amazing how I had been missing them for years
Amy Adams: Her as Amelia Earhart in Night at the Museum was also definitely a huge Thing to young me. Again, I had been completely oblivious about this crush for years
David Luiz: HAH! This is the point where we do NOT get into my football/soccer crushes bc this list would get WAYYY too long hahaha. I had to cut loads of people from my list for this post bc I develop a new celebrity crush every 5 minutes basically but yeah. David Luiz was definitely my biggest football/soccer crush out of..... everyone else
M*rvel
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I don’t have a lot to say about any of them since I’m not into m*rvel anymore TFATWS makes me want to stick the tip of my toe back into m*rvel waters but otherwise NO THANKS
Sebastian Stan was, if my judgement of my archive is right, the longest highkey celebrity crush I’ve ever had. Mostly because I love Bucky a lot and he was so amazing in Captain America: The Winter Soldier. I must’ve had a crush on him for as long as I had been in the m*rvel fandom
Recent Past
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some celeb crushes from last year that were all more or less short-lived tbh
Ester Expósito: As it often goes I didn’t find her spectacular in the beginning but as Élite went on I started to develop a huge crush on her. I still find her pretty hot but I’m not invested in Élite so yeah..... I have no object permanence
Mina El Hammani: Got to know her through Élite, too. She’s so incredibly beautiful. Had a hard time choosing a photo of her bc I’d stare at every single one for ages. Wow.
Danger Days!Gerard Way: Hah! The ones of you who’ve been following me for longer might remember my posts about wanting to dye my hair neon red. Well, him’s the reason and also clinical depression. Ended up with natural red/ginger bc my hair is too thin for bleaching lel. ANYWAY
Maxence Danet Fauvel: Pretty short-lived crush from my Skam days
Ramy Moharam Fouad: So Ramy has a brother, Tamino-Amir Moharam Fouad, who makes INCREDIBLE music. Ramy made some of his music videos (directed them? not sure), that’s how he came to my attention. Idk man he’s just so incredibly beautiful.... gives me a hint of genvy, too......
Janelle Monáe: Became a fan when Make Me Feel came out, listened to the entire album for days and eventually inevitably crushed on her
Lera Abova: Saw her in ANИА and fell in love. I screamed to my friends for weeks about how she was the most beautiful human being I’d ever seen etc etc. Eventually my crush went away mostly, but I still think she’s stunning
Keiynan Lonsdale: Keiynan said FUCK gender and I said 😍😍😍 and that’s all you need to know.
Current
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*deep breath* alright let’s gooo
Bright (Wachirawit Chivaaree): Crushed on him for as long as I watched 2gether/Still 2gether lmao. I still like him a lot and sometimes lose my mind over him but I’m not exceptionally Thirsty™
Tul (Pakorn Thanasrivanitchai) and Max (Nattapol Diloknawarit): If you search either of them on tumblr you will have to scroll for a long, long time to find seperate photos of them. However, I’m not patient enough so here we are. Re: Tul, actually I want to copy/paste what Ali said bc DAMN a man who is confident about his masculinity and sexuality really is kinda hot. Same goes for Max tbh. Also Max’ lips look so soft I [redacted]
Lukas von Horbatschewsky: Also known as Lukas Alexander. He did an amazing job in Druck and he’s just a person I admire in general. As one of the few out trans actors in Germany, he had a main role as a trans boy in Druck and also co-wrote Druck’s seasons 5 and 6. He’s just a huge role model to me and, apart from that, Big Crush Material (h i s  e y e s)
Li Wei: Someone suggested him as Hua Cheng for the TGCF live action and my life hasn’t been the same since. While I’m open for whoever will get that role in the end, I could look at his face for hours and not get bored. Major Genvy, too.
Li BoWen and Liu HaiKuan: I will have to deal with these two in one paragraph bc LanLan bc they have the exact same effect on me which is. that they’re not 100% my type but I WILL go absolutely feral about them at regular intervals, if you know what I mean
Song JiYang: ohh honey. oh honey.......... hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. I have a natural affinity for aquarius ppl and this one lives in my heart rent free. I’d even make him soup if he’d ask.
Wang YiBo: WELL HOLY SHIT. listen. LISTEN! the hype around him is 100% justified imo he really is That Bitch and I love him so so much for it. Fucking ICON
Honorary Mentions: Gender Envy
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Here’s to the People I Thought I Had A Crush On But Not Quite until I learned the word Gender Envy:
Zhu YiLong: Man, this is the person who’s mainly responsible for me finding out AT ALL about not being entirely cis. The POWER he holds!!! His performance as Ye Zun in Guardian was like a breakthrough point for me which. certain people witnessed in real time hahaha oh I love this fandom!!
Zhu ZanJin: HIM. AAAH!! He’s literally so beautiful and whenever I see him I just go ZANZAN!! in my head and in the tags bc. well. hIM.
Xiao Zhan With Long Hair: Look, Xiao Zhan is always amazing but BLESS the person who made these manips. I can finally rest.
Wang YiBo: uhh what’s he doing here again?? Tbh YiBo is one of the few, if not the only person that gives me Major Gender Envy that I would also [redacted] if they asked. Do I want to be him or be with him? The answer is Yes.
I skipped the fictional characters bc I tend not to crush on them 👉👈 Instead I will just directly crush on the actors/actresses lol!
Thank you for bearing with me. As a prize, you can choose between a ladder supported forehead kiss, or a bowl of homemade soup. ❤
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silver-wield · 5 years ago
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Cloti Resolution Analysis
So I was sent an ask about analysing the promise scene between Cloud and Tifa, and I completely went to another plane of existence and did the Resolution instead. Oh well, enjoy the breakdown and I’ll get to bby Tifa and Cloud another time.
Ok, spoiler warning for ppl who haven't played (I tag FF7R spoilers as final fantasy 7 remake spoilers) and it's gonna be a VERY long one so prepare to scroll.
Also, this is one person's interpretation of the scene, so if you disagree that's cool and we'll agree to disagree.
You're also gonna have to excuse the janky quality on some of the screens, I'm grabbing them from Youtube and it's frustrating af trying to get the exact moment I want.
Other analyses if anyone's interested.
Shinra HQ vision scene (Cloti/plot analysis) 
Chapter 3 (Cloti reblog) 
Tifa character analysis 
Aerith Resolution (plot analysis) 
Train graveyard (not really an analysis, but I got some sweet screenshots of Cloti) 
Clotiscrew tunnel analysis 
Now, strap in and enjoy the ride.
Ok, recapping for anyone who hasn't seen this yet.
We begin with Cloud waking, having heard someone leaving the house. He checks, it's not Barret, so he goes out to investigate and spies Tifa staring at the night sky.
Now from this there's actually an unmentioned possibility Cloud decides Tifa doesn't want company and leaves. This obviously doesn't happen because he's developed his character to the point where he'd put himself out for someone else and find out what's wrong. The point I’m making is that Cloud is that guy who’d say “Not interested” and leave, but because he cares about Tifa, he stays. 
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Right away we get hints of concern on his face. Obviously, with everything they just went through and all the people they lost he's expecting something along those lines when he asks if she can't sleep. The head tilt that goes with this has echoes of chapter 3 when he invites Tifa to share her worries, only this time she's got her back to him so can't see it.
Tifa, for her part, isn't very forthcoming. She's quite closed off, almost unwilling to open up and talk. She's probably come out because – as she said – she can't sleep and didn't actually intend for Cloud to follow. She apologises for waking him. There was no intent on her part to force a confidence between them. We can't even see her eyes until she replies, which is intentional on the framing to further express her being closed off. Remember, eye contact matters and a lack of eye contact with the audience means she's hiding from us too.
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Damn it, she's so clearly cut up but trying to hold it together here it breaks my heart! I'm trying to figure out if her eyes are already swollen from repressing the urge to cry or if it's my imagination. Either way, she's distracted. She's not focused on Cloud or the conversation that much. A distant, polite answer from her is likely meant to hint she's not up for a chat, which is why I love that Cloud doesn't leave. She needs comforting and he's aware of that.
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Demoralised tone of voice. Keeps her back to him. Head bowed. She's totally in her own head at this point and having woken Cloud up is just another black mark. She wanted to be alone and wallow, but she can't even do that right. So, when Cloud brushes it off and even goes so far as to make a light-hearted joke – yes him saying it's a SOLDIER thing isn't about him drawing attention to the fact he's succeeded with that part of their promise, he's capable enough to protect her – he's saying it to lower her guard, and that's why she laughs. It's the opening he needs to encourage her to talk so he can find out what's wrong.
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Ah, the moment people think this scene is all about Aerith. Excuse me while I roll my eyes.
Now, remember, in the previous glimpse of her we saw she had her head bowed. She's not looking at the stars anymore like she would when recalling her and Cloud's promise. She's looking down at the flowers. The same type of flower that Cloud gave her and she put on the counter in Seventh Heaven. This is why she brings up Aerith because she's the flower seller.
We're shown her feet at this point because she's turning. Cloud's little joke has opened her up enough that she believes she can face him. She can confide in him. She asks about the flower not because she's all about Aerith, but because the flower was in Seventh Heaven: her home. And what is the reason she's out there in the first place? Why can't she sleep? Because she just saw everything she holds dear crushed, literally. She watched Biggs and Jessie die – ok we know better but she doesn't. She let Aerith get kidnapped by Shinra and almost got Marlene killed too – yes, she's definitely the type to blame herself for this too. She's lost friends – who knows how many? There's death and fire and it's all because of Shinra, again.
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Ah the other moment people believe makes this all about Aerith. That isn't a “I got caught with another woman” look of guilt. That's an “I lied to you,” guilty look because, if you remember, back when Cloud gave Tifa the flower she said, “What's up with you, buying flowers?” and he said, “A guy can change,” making her believe he'd purposely sought out Aerith to buy a flower for Tifa. Obviously, he doesn't want to contradict himself while she's in a heightened state, so he's all “uhhh.” That's an “I don't know what to say so this doesn't hurt her,” look.
Tifa awkwardly laughs it off. Poor thing, her misconception about Cloud's thoughtfulness is shattered without him having to say a word. Putting a brave face on it, but she's disappointed. And that's not because she thinks she's “lost” to Aerith, but she thought something of Cloud that wasn't right. She thought their relationship had moved on more at that point, which further supports the subsequent intimate moments between them. Now, she's wondering if anything she knew is right.
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And that is clear disappointment that he didn't actually do it on his own initiative. Regret hits hard when it comes, right, Cloud?
It goes on with Tifa explaining she looked up the meaning of the flower – now we don't know when, but it's safe to assume it's around the time of the reactor 5 mission when Cloud goes missing. She likely got back to Seventh Heaven, spotted the flower, linked its importance to Cloud and then looked up the meaning. When she saw it symbolised reunion, she did everything she could to keep it alive as a symbol of hope they'd meet again. They'd be reunited. It isn't symbolising anything to do with Aerith. The reason she even brings it up is because of where they are. It's the location that prompts the association.
Now, remember, Tifa has lived through a massive tragedy once before. She literally lost everyone in Nibelheim. It's stated in other media that Shinra rounded up survivors and gave them to Hojo – they became numbered experiments or died. Tifa is the only survivor and she only made it out because her teacher, Zangan, found her. It's also implied that anyone else from Nibelheim was tracked down and killed to silence them after Shinra remade the town – so on the off chance that Tifa went to Midgar to find people she knew, she wouldn't find any in the town and when she asked after Cloud at Shinra she was told he went missing, which explains why she says she's so glad to have Cloud back.
When she says the flower is dead and buried, she's relating it not to her relationship with Cloud – I mean he is literally ten feet in front of her listening to her and offering a shoulder to cry on. No, she's relating the flower to the location. She's talking about her home. Where before she linked it to reuniting with Cloud, once she learned about the danger to sector 7 she linked the flower to reuniting with the people most dear to her there. These are people she's known for five years. She's not a callous, unfeeling bitch, who only focuses on herself and some dude she's just got back in touch with. It's clear from NPC dialogue while you're running around that Tifa is very much loved and respected – and crushed on – in the slum. The people love her and she loves them. She wanted them to be safe more than anything. Her entire arc getting back to the sector is filled with panic. Her focus is her home and the hope she finds it and the people safe.
So, now she's saying that hope she clung to, like the flower, is dead.
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And there it is, the brave smile that falters. She's trying so hard to not burden anyone because – as Marle says later on – crying is pointless. Remember, Marle is the one who looked after Tifa, which means Marle's mindset is the one Tifa's been exposed to from 15 to 20. Remember, Tifa is only 20 years old. She's not some grizzled warrior, she's a young girl who had to watch her father die, her town get burned to the ground and be left alone. The only survivor. Until Cloud. Marle has taught her it's pointless to cry; Avalanche and everyone in it has told her she needs to be tough and hard and unfeeling if they want to succeed. But, Tifa doesn't want anyone to die. Not her friends or her enemies. She's not got that hard core, no matter how much she acts cool and detached.
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And this is the point that Cloud is likely hearing about his home for the first time. We know he was there, but it's one of those memories he's shut out. The reminder is one of the few times he doesn't get a flash of pain, either. That soft exhale of surprise, the eyes widening just a touch. Cloud hadn't thought to relate his past to this event, and likely hadn't related it to Tifa, either. He's shut it out, so expected her to, as well. This is a musing expression. He's thinking about what she just said. It hits him this is where her emotions are focused. She's in the past, and that gives him the chance to think about the past. This is what opens him up to needing comfort just as much as she does, because he's not processed his grief either. They're both stuck in that place where they weren't allowed to mourn the people they loved and all they've lost.
Then we're treated to a reminder of the physical distance between them in this scene – which has been a theme between them since the start. There's physical distance, that closes at times, then widens again, highlighting how they're struggling to find their way back to each other for various reasons. Cloud because he can't fully relate to his feelings for her and Tifa because she's too afraid of losing him to truly open up.
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And then Tifa takes those few steps – that seemed to take forever – to meet him. She's looking for comfort from the Cloud she knew. The real Cloud. His expression here is surprise because, well, Tifa's just not like that, remember? She's reserved and self-contained. He wasn't expecting her to do this. He's once again confronted with a woman being forward. Only, it's different this time because it's Tifa and he knows and trusts her and has all these complicated feelings he can't define. He knows part of him – the 14 year old who wants his crush to notice him – is ok with this. It's what he wants. That's why he doesn't move. He wants to offer her comfort, be the strong capable SOLDIER he thought she wanted.
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Oh, but look, the dawning realisation he's just as upset as she is. His hard expression wavers, just for a moment, and he looks cut up. He doesn't know if he can be the strong SOLDIER right now because, just as she's processing grief, he is too.
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Hearing her sob, really sob, is hard for Cloud to take. Just like in the pillar when Jessie said, “Tifa's crying,” and Cloud lost his cool for a moment and felt like a failure. He couldn't prevent any of it. He let her down. Listening to her cry tugs at the latent feelings he has for her, but he's still so wrapped up in that fake persona of what he thinks he should be that he doesn't know what to offer her in comfort. You can hear a couple of attempts at speech, but ultimately he doesn't say anything.
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I wasn't gonna screen this bit, but what the hell.
You can see the hesitation in his movements. He doesn't know if he should hug her. Tifa's hand isn't quite touching Cloud as it moves from his side to his shoulder, but then when he pulls her in close there's full contact between them with no space. I mean, he's holding her tight.
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After the pan away to the stream – which is likely a nod to the lifestream scene in the OG – we're back with them and Tifa's calmed down somewhat.
Cloud's distracted. We can only guess what he's thinking about, but considering the conversation they just had it's probably a blank with vague unsettled grief about his past that he can't grab hold of. He knows he can relate with Tifa at that moment. He's hugging her so tight he hurts her. He's hugging so tight because he needs comfort from her just as she does from him. He lost people too. He's so in his own head that he doesn't quite hear her say his name at first, and then I speculate he expected to hear something else besides, “you're hurting me,” if that very soft “hmm?” is anything to go by. His head was in a place where the outcome of their moment was different. Hurt/comfort is a thing after all.
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And then there's the “oh shit, I can't even comfort her properly” moment. He's dismayed he hurt her when he was supposed to be helping. That boy with a crush is mortified and the grown ass man isn't much better. He's ruined the intimacy and lack of emotional distance by failing. Again.
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But that doesn't mean he won't linger until the last possible second before stepping back again. The downturned mouth, frown and concern are clear. He doesn't think he did very much at all for her. Does he feel guilty about hurting her, not being the man she deserves? Possibly. He definitely looks regretful. Likely thinking what he could've done better. He wasn't much help at all to her.
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“It's stupid. I know that crying's a waste of time.”
Ah, here's what he can do for her. His physical comfort missed the mark, but this is something he can do. He can reassure her. Get back some of that emotional closeness between them. And it succeeds. Tifa's gratitude is clear in her tearful smile and heartfelt thank you.
Conclusion.
How romantic is this scene? I hear no one asking cause you all made up your minds well before I even started. Well, from my pov, I'd say it's definitely up there, although it's very heavily rooted in hurt/comfort and relying on their childhood closeness to further their intimacy. But, that's ok because plenty of great couples begin like this and there's usually a moment like this within Final Fantasy narratives.
Rinoa/Squall's Ragnarok scene? There was no kissing in that either, but the emotional intimacy was clear. And Squall is just as big a butthead as Cloud tbf.
Tidus/Yuna laughing scene? Hahaha, I bet you thought I'd mention the lake instead? Well, no because that is clearly intimacy on a different level to this. We're at the developing intimacy stage, and that stage in 10 was them confiding in each other and laughing together.
This is Cloud/Tifa sharing their grief and comforting each other. The scenes parallel. Whether or not this means it's canon is up to you to decide, but combined with all the compilation evidence – yeah, I've heard the latest argument that compilation doesn't count anymore and until it's confirmed by Square I'm not listening – it does heavily suggest that Tifa and Cloud's relationship will continue along this route to the endgame where they confirm their feelings for each other under the Highwind.
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donkey-hyuck · 4 years ago
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— thank you ❤︎
~ as i am writing this, i have surpassed 400 followers (now at 402)! i am thankful for everyone who has followed me and followed my passion as a writer. i started this blog somewhere last year (mayb march of 2019??) but unfortunately, i did delete my first few posts— even tho i really regret deleting it in the first place— but they were just not good so ig i had a reason??? however, thank you all for liking my shit haha
it’s kind of upsetting bc i have no asks to actually answer, but half of my followers are moots— lmao—and i’m so glad and thankful for every one of you. you all made me realize that i could be myself and even brought out a side of me i didn’t even knew i had. i’ve met so many good people that i genuinely consider friends and i’m so happy! so a big thanks for my following is all of you!!💗 (not gonna tag ppl bc ion wanna be cheesy😭)
now i have some giftes for y’all! i’ve updated my headers (of which have alr been edited and posted for the teasers), and i have some story ideas and headers alr in mind so i’m just gonna give them to you!
❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎
— (song fic; butterflies by queen naija) ↴
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genre- angst (in the beginning) || fluff (pray for me)|| lil suggestive || strangers to friends to lovers|| college!au
characters/pairing- basketball player!yukhei x fem!reader || wayv/nct || (more to come..)
— in the midst of your relationship crisis, you’re set up with one of the most known basketball players in the district. though, you were more alike than you thought, yukhei made you feel some type of way; only for the feeling to be reciprocated. and you caused butterflies in each other’s tummies.
— release date: to be determined
❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎
— (song fic; i.l.y. by the rose) ↴
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genre- fluff || angst || idol!au
characters/pairing- idol!jisung x younger, fem!reader || nct || other sm artists
— the reality of the world hit you both in the face. he was an idol and you were just an ordinary person that attended school and just overall worked your ass off. exposed by a dispatch article, there were an abundance of people that said the two of you would never work and that you were too young. yet you and jisung proved society wrong. and after quite the buzz, sm had released a press confirmation that changed your lives; and for the better.
— release date: to be determined
❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎
— (demi-god!au) ↴
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genre- fluff || maybe a lil suggestive || also maybe a bit angst??? || demi-god! au || college freshman! au || e2l! au
characters/pairing- demi-god!donghyuck x fem, mortal!reader || nct || (more to come..)
— his secret was out, but no one cared. in fact, it made them love him even more. the son of nike, goddess of victory. he excelled at everything, only he was the exact opposite of his mother, and you hated him for that.
— release date: to be determined
❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎
— (criminal!au) ↴
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genre- princess! au || criminal! au || angst || fluff ||suggestive
characters/pairing- criminal!hyuck X princess!reader || nct || (more to come..)
— born and raised in the castle, you never really got to experience life out of it. everything you did and learned had to be within the castle walls. yet, you were soon to be the queen, and have barely seen the people living in your kingdom. it was a shame, truly. but one night, whilst tossing and turning in your sleep, the bustle of rope on your balcony had instinctively told you to rise. slowly, opening the balcony doors, you’re met with criminal mastermind, lee donghyuck. you felt attracted to him the minute he spoke. and he promised you freedom from your own people. but he lied about who he was and his past, and when you later found out, you felt so damn naive.
— release date: to be determined
❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎
— (tv show inspired) ↴
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genre- fluff || a lot of action (bc I’m a nerd)
characters/pairing- not a lot of pairing (even tho aang and katara highkey had a thing) avatar!mark x fem, waterbender!reader || nct || (more to come..)
— after accidentally coming across the last air bender with your brother, he is faced with the reality of the world a hundred years later. the fire nation had taken over almost all the villages across the globe. you and your brother had been destined to help out the avatar. and it was the avatar’s destiny to restore peace in the world. now it was time for the avatar to master all elements to defeat the fire nation and end the hundred year war; all while having the smallest crush on said water bender.
— release date: to be determined
❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎
— (pirate!au) ↴
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genre- angst || fluff-ish lol || maybe a bit suggestive??
characters/pairing- pirate!hendery x runaway bride!reader || wayv/nct || (more to come..)
— you were arranged to be engaged to some snobby hero. but he was no hero, he was an impulsive liar. the man only got away with things because of his charm. everyone in the whole town believed what he said, no matter how false it was. the only true thing about him was that he loved you yet you didn’t have the guts to love him back. and on the day of your wedding, things didn’t go as planned and you were stolen as a victim. aboard the pirate ship, famous for its savages, wong kunhang is the captain of the boat and has a huge debt to pay.
— release date: to be determined
❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎
— (prince!au) ↴
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genre- maleficent! au || dark fey! au || prince! au || angst || fantasy || suggestive
characters/pairing- prince!jaemin X fey, fem!reader || nct || (more to come..)
— the boy, na jaemin. ever since he had been born, stories of the fey’s had been the main talk within the kingdom for centuries. and na jaemin was an inquisitive person. so when one of his knights had told him a story about his experience with a fey, his curiosity only grew more. he was a very young boy when he first snuck out of the kingdom walls, out into the forest surrounding it. the rustling of the trees and branches only filled his ears as the moonlight cascaded onto his pale skin. until it was completely covered. since then, years had passed by, and na jaemin finds himself venturing past the walls once more. to find the fey that drew him into the mystical world behind it.
— release date: to be determined
❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎
— (from this point on, these fics i just haven’t written down yet) ↴
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genre- prince/king!au || fluff || angst
characters/pairing- prince!taeil x seamstress!reader || nct || (more to come..)
— prince moon taeil, now, king. he’d first met you when you were both twelve. living at the orphanage at the time, taeil was amazed at how beautifully skilled you were at your music abilities. his mother and father had always thrived off of the sound and calmness music had brought them. but when he introduced you as a musician, they had refused to acknowledge you and expelled you from ever getting near their son and the castle ever again. but taeil would not give up, because after all those years of listening to you, he’d developed feelings. you were the music notes to his own song; the pauper and the prince. (rough-draft summary)
— release date: to be determined
❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎
— (song fic; when night falls [긴밤이오면 OST] by eddy kim) ↴
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genre- post breakup!au (if that makes sense) || long distance relationship!au || ghost!au || angst :’)
characters/pairing- ghost!jungwoo x fem!reader || nct || (more to come..)
— they said long distance relationships weren’t easy. but after five whole years, you and jungwoo had proved the hypothesis wrong. there was the occasional meeting while you were in seoul but other than that, it was all screens and pixelated lovers. however, when you got moved to a new job, farther than what you had expected, your path was solely based on your career and so you broke up with the man. three years had then gone by with little communication until the second year came and jungwoo completely cut contact with you. but when you came back to visit friends, kim jungwoo’s spirit— who now roams the streets of seoul, korea— notices you’re back; but you never noticed that he was gone. (rough-draft summary)
— release date: to be determined
❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎
— (high school! au) ↴
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genre- high school (musical)!au || lots of fluff || a lil angst
characters/pairing- troy bolton esque! chenle, gabriella montez esque!reader || nct || (more to come..)
— after moving across the country, your father was granted an internship. so once you moved to the place you didn’t call home, there was someone that brought it all back. who knew after one interaction would make you feel this way? (rough-draft summary)
— release date: to be determined
❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎ ❤︎
thank you all again!! please look forward to these! i love you to the universe and back!💗
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dottie-wan-kenobi · 5 years ago
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song lyrics I use to characterize Dick Grayson
This is definitely not everything (& I would love to do more) but it’s also Extremely Freaking Long so. Many thanks to @zitkaplushie for chatting w me abt this! I would love to hear your thoughts/additions/etc. If u disagree w any of these, feel free to debate w me but please be civil!!
— OVERALL:
Drag Me Down by One Direction: okay there are tons of parts that fit but this line is the best: “I've got fire for a heart / I'm not scared of the dark / You've never seen it look so easy”
I think this one is kind of straightforward lol but. The first line kind of tells me that Dick is passionate, and feels more with his heart than his head. The second line is just kind of a tongue in cheek thing like obviously he’s not. And the third one is both Dick’s confidence and also that it’s just TRUE. He makes things look easy, all kinds of things. It’s just a fact. 
High Hopes by Panic! at The Disco: ugh this has such good lines but this one: “Mama said / Burn your biographies / Rewrite your history / Light up your wildest dreams / Museum victories, every day / We wanted everything, wanted everything”
So I think “Mama” thru to “dreams” ties back to him becoming Nightwing, or going through different identities and kind of letting himself go with it to an extent. Like he doesn’t let it hold him back. The rest of it, like...that’s just Dick’s superheroing career. “We” in this case could be him and Bruce, him and the Titans, him and Damian, etc etc
Catch My Breath by Kelly Clarkson: um. the whole song. the whole thing. buuuut one line I’ll analyze will be: “I don't wanna be left behind / Distance was a friend of mine / Catching breath in a web of lies / I've spent most of my life / Riding waves, playing acrobat / Shadowboxing the other half / Learning how to react”
“I don't wanna be left behind” - he knows this feeling well already and doesn’t want to relive it
“Distance was a friend of mine / Catching breath in a web of lies” - he has like no civilian friends in canon, and even then he’s always lying to somebody about something. There aren’t many people he can be truly close to and open with, other than like Donna and Roy and Kory
“I've spent most of my life / Riding waves, playing acrobat / Shadowboxing the other half / Learning how to react” - idk, when I see this it makes me think that he’s just lived this life that isn’t exactly normal and he recognizes that
Birds by Imagine Dragons: this one makes me so sad but: “I know that / Ooh, birds fly in different directions / Ooh, I hope to see you again / Ooh, birds fly in different directions / Ooh, so fly high, so fly high”
So obviously Dick has lost a lot of people important to him over the years, either because they died or DC said XYZ and Dick’s relationship no longer has any rights, but. This is how he would feel about that. Grudging acceptance, hope to see them again, wishing them well. 
Dance Monkey by Tones And I: I had to. “I said, oh my god, I see you walking by / Take my hands, my dear, and look me in my eyes / Just like a monkey I've been dancing my whole life / But you just beg to see me dance just one more time”
I’ll mention this later on, but I think that Dick projects an image a lot of the time that isn’t what he’s really feeling. This ties into that - I think at certain points in his life, he just gets exhausted and wants to take a break, but he can’t. He feels like everyone is counting on him, either to do this or that, or keep up this appearance. Sometimes they really are, and sometimes it’s pressure he’s putting onto himself!
Icarus by Bastille: tbh this is a song that I think applies to most if not all of the batfam, but for Dick, this is part of it that I like: “You put up your defenses when you leave / You leave because you're certain / Of who you want to be”
I prefer the version of canon where Dick willingly decides to stop being Robin, but even in the way that he gets kicked out, this tells me that he’s steeling himself for whatever may come, and that he’s sure of his actions. 
Stars by Grace Potter: now THIS one is freaking sad. “All those times we looked up at the sky / Looking out so far, it felt like we could fly / And now I'm all alone in the dark of night / And the moon is shining, but I can't see the light.”
Again, he’s lost a lot of ppl!! I usually think of this song as him referring to his parents or Bruce after he “dies”, but it could apply to anyone really. And these lines in specific just make me think that he feels lonely without whoever it is, that he’s not in a good place.
Simple Man by Lynyrd Skynyrd: "Boy, don't you worry, you'll find yourself / Follow your heart and nothing else / And you can do this, oh baby, if you try / All that I want for you, my son, is to be satisfied"
Okay so maybe I hc that the Graysons were very much so free spirits who rubbed off a lot on Dick. But with that aside, to me this is Dick being determined to live a happy life, and knowing it’s going to be a struggle at times. “You’ll find yourself” and “if you try” are things that I think Dick keeps close to mind. Like, maybe he doesn’t know everything right now, but he will. He’ll figure it out. And he can get through anything if he just pushes through it.
Weight In Gold by Gallant: “I’m pulling my weight in gold / Call me anxious, call me broke / But I can’t lift this on my own”
I’ve already mentioned this but Dick has a lot of pressure on his shoulders, like all the time. And he’s also someone who reaches out to others, which is what these lyrics are saying. He’s aware when he can’t handle the pressure anymore and can admit it to himself. (I don’t think this fits him ALL the time, I mean it just doesn’t, but. Sometimes.)
Tears Of A Clown by Smokey Robinson: I really fuck with the idea that Dick is, still, an entertainer. that + the pressure he’s under = “Now if I appear to be carefree / It's only to camouflage my sadness / In order to shield my pride I've tried / To cover this hurt with a show of gladness”
The word “camouflage” stands out to me because I think sometimes the way he hides parts of who he is is to protect himself??? Dick can also be a prideful person, who might not want others to know that he’s been hurt by something they’ve done. 
The Show Must Go On by Queen: relatedly,,, this whole song fits him perfectly. but to do something not related to smiling: “Show must go on. / I'll face it with a grin. / I'm never giving in— / Oh—with the show. / I'll top the bill, / I'll overkill. / I have to find the will to carry on with the show.” 
This ties back to him hiding his real feelings, of course, but also it speaks to how he doesn’t do things by half. This makes me think about being Batman, about how he won’t give in to the pressure, will push through and keep going and uphold his dad’s legacy as best as he can
Pumpin Blood by NONONO: “It's so magical feeling, that no one's got a hold / You're a catalyst to your own happiness you know”
This goes back to my thoughts that Dick has this mindset that if he keeps going, keeps putting in as much effort as he needs to, then he can get what he needs. It’s also kind of those moments where Dick realizes that where he is is good, like being Robin, but it’s not great, and it could be great. When he decides to stop being Robin, it’s like he’s thinking, “I could be happier, and if I want that, I need to do it myself.”
Rocketeer by Far East Movement: this song fits in a lot of spots but. “Here we go, come with me / There's a world out there that we should see / Take my hand, close your eyes / With you right here, I'm a rocketeer”
Overall imo this is a shippy song but this lyric specifically could be Dick and anyone at all -- he’s the kind of guy who reaches out to others, who would enjoy showing people new things. I also think the last bit kind of speaks to how he can feel better and more empowered when he’s not going through things alone 
I Want To Break Free by Queen: “But life still goes on / I can't get used to, living without, living without / Living without you by my side / I don't want to live alone, hey / God knows, got to make it on my own / So baby can't you see / I've got to break free”
This goes back to a few things. For one, I feel that when he feels held back or held down, he’s VERY aware of it and doesn’t like it, and wants to have his freedom back. Another one is, considering all the people he’s lost, it’s like...he doesn’t want to live without them but there’s no choice, he has to. And finally, I also think this is to Bruce, like he’s feeling like he could do and be more if he weren’t being restricted by Bruce
Teams & Friends, Ships, Family, & Bruce under the cut!
— TEAMS & FRIENDS:
Young Volcanoes by Fall Out Boy: there’s a reason why I named my fic after this lol. “When Rome's in ruins / We are the lions / Free of the coliseums / In poisoned places / We are anti-venom / We're the beginning of the end”
I think that Dick really does enjoy superheroing, and that he’s proud of himself and those he works with for being courageous, kind, and helpful to the world. In his more positive moments, this is what I feel like he’d think of his teams and their impacts.
Home by Daughtry: I’ve always thought of this one as a batfam song but tbh I think it works better as a Titans one. “Well I'm going home, / Back to the place where I belong, / And where your love has always been enough for me. / I'm not running from. / No, I think you got me all wrong. / I don't regret this life I chose for me. / But these places and these faces are getting old, / So I'm going home.”
The way I interpret this is like...he DOES love Bruce, he does love the batfam, but ultimately when he thinks about home he thinks of his friends. This is kind of him talking to Bruce, at least in the second half. Another reason why I put it here is that there’s another lyric in the song that says, “I'm going to the place where love / And feeling good don't ever cost a thing.” In the batfam, as zitkaplushie said, love isn’t conditional or anything but it IS exhausting. It takes a toll on them. Love with the titans is just easier.
— SHIPS:
Make Me Feel by Janelle Monae: Dick is bi like this song and this line describes his at-times tumultuous relationships: “It's like I'm powerful with a little bit of tender / An emotional, sexual bender / Mess me up, yeah, but no one does it better / There's nothing better”
He takes comfort and strength from his relationships and sometimes that’s good, hence the powerful/tender part! But in all his relationships, not just his romantic ones, it’s (sometimes) easy for people to affect him
I’m Gonna Be (500 Miles) by Celtic Thunder: this fits all of his ships imo: “When I'm lonely, well I know I'm gonna be / I'm gonna be the man who's lonely without you / And when I'm dreaming, well I know I'm gonna dream / I'm gonna dream about the time when I'm with you”
He’s just a sappy boy who is in love. That said, I don’t think these feelings would overtake him!
— FAMILY:
Losing My Religion by R.E.M.: I read this heartbreaking fic recently that dealt with how Dick hid his feelings from EVERYONE and no one noticed anything was wrong, really, except Cass. so. “Every whisper / Of every waking hour / I'm choosing my confessions / Trying to keep an eye on you / Like a hurt, lost and blinded fool, fool / Oh no, I've said too much / I set it up”
Dick is more open than his siblings, but he does still hide things, especially from them. The line “I'm choosing my confessions / Trying to keep an eye on you” makes me think of Dick trying to take care of his siblings, whichever way he can
This Must Be The Place (Naive Melody) by Kishi Bashi: “Home is where I want to be / Pick me up and turn me round / I feel numb - born with a weak heart / I guess I must be having fun / The less we say about it the better / Make it up as we go along / Feet on the ground / Head in the sky / It's OK, I know nothing's wrong... nothing”
“Make it up as we go along / Feet on the ground / Head in the sky / It's OK, I know nothing's wrong... nothing” - this reads happier than it’s sang but I do think it describes the more positive side of the family dynamics! 
You’re Not There by Lukas Graham: this one is abt (all of) his parents :( “I only got you in my stories / And you know I tell them right / I remember you and I, when I'm awake at night / So give it up for fallen glory / I never got to say goodbye / I wish I could ask for just a bit more time”
There are times where the deaths of his parents & Bruce (and Alfred) weigh heavily on him, and that everything he does is kind of continuing on where they left off, or doing something they didn’t have time to do. I think he would tell his kids stories about them and that he would try to be as true to them as he can be. And then of course, “So give it up for fallen glory / I never got to say goodbye / I wish I could ask for just a bit more time” is kind of his relationship with his parents after they die
— BRUCE:
(I gave him a separate section bc I have a lot of feels abt them okay??)
The Ballad of Dick Grayson by Crafty McVillain: there are actually a lot of songs abt Dick Grayson, but I picked this one bc of this: “Broken hearts improve, but my mind's broken too / Show me how to hurt and I'll hurt them with you / I'll take on the world, I will fight for you / But tell me how to stop, cause now I'm fighting you”
This is abt when Jason takes on Robin but I like to look at this like:
“Broken hearts improve, but my mind's broken too / Show me how to hurt and I'll hurt them with you” - this is when Dick first comes to the Manor, and when he’s first becoming Robin. He’s struggling and Bruce shows him a way to cope. (is it healthy? lmao)
“I'll take on the world, I will fight for you” - this is just...any time really lol. Dick is loyal to Bruce (to an extent) and will fight alongside him, will do almost anything for him
“But tell me how to stop, cause now I'm fighting you” - then this is how it feels when they’re broken apart for the first time, when they aren’t getting along and it’s just a change from the past few years, and Dick doesn’t know what to do about it
Let You Down by NF: “Feels like we're on the edge right now / I wish that I could say I'm proud / I'm sorry that I let you down / Let you down”
“I'm sorry that I let you down / Let you down” - this could be pre-emptive, Dick kind of thinking that no matter what he does, he’s most likely going to let Bruce down
Like how Bruce is always that 8 year old who lost his parents, Dick is always who he was the first night he went out as Robin, desperately wanting Bruce’s approval
He wants the approval and hates that he does, it feels like it holds him down
The Chain by Fleetwood Mac: “Listen to the wind blow / Watch the sun rise / Run in the shadows / Damn your love / Damn your lies”
When I read these lyrics, I think about Bruce and Dick when they’ve been arguing, having a quiet moment (the peace after the storm, zitkaplushie said), kind of reflecting, and Dick just thinks, “I want you to love me but I want you to stop lying to me.” Or like, “your love comes with your lies and I don’t know if I can handle that [right now].”
Numb by Linkin Park: “I've become so numb, I can't feel you there / Become so tired, so much more aware / I'm becoming this, all I want to do / Is be more like me and be less like you”
There’s this moment in canon, before he even gives up being Robin, where he’s acting just like Batman, hunting down criminals with a single-minded ferocity that has his friends legit concerned for him. I can’t remember exactly what he felt about it when he kind of snapped out it but these lyrics remind me of that. He doesn’t want to be like Bruce, he doesn’t want to be Batman, and especially as a teenager, that last line is big. Overall it also fits when Dick IS Batman, and he feels like he’s kind of being swallowed by everything that it is
The Archer by Taylor Swift: okay I’m sorry I can’t pick between these two: “I've got a hundred thrown out speeches / I almost said to you” and “And all of my heroes / Die all alone / Help me hold on to you”
There are a lot of things Dick doesn’t say to Bruce over the years, or things that he wants to say but doesn’t for however long until he can’t hold it in anymore or it’s the right time or whatever. Ultimately that line just tells me that their relationship isn’t one with great communicating
“And all of my heroes / Die all alone” - Bruce ‘dying’. “Help me hold on to you” - Batman when Dick is him. Or it could be about Dick’s parents, and then Dick trying to keep Bruce alive as Robin/Nightwing
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somnilogical · 5 years ago
Text
no shelter
some of you may have had occasion to run into transfems preforming cryptographically secure tests for cissexism and to wonder therefore how they got that way, and here, in partial explanation perhaps, is a story of the one transfem, somnulence logencia:
(mostly cut and pasted from messages to my friends)
i called this homeless shelter and asked if they had any rooms and they said they did and to come on in and then when they saw my id they were like "how about you go to the mens side" and i was like "how about i dont want to be raped" and they were like okay and told me to sleep in a foldable cot in the entrance room. with a harsh white light on all night, i stretched it to two nights and then they kicked me out and said they had no room.
a thing about being oppressed is theres so much opportunity for snark because things are obviously fucked.
they were like "no one can come in to your room you are safe here" "so no one can come in to the main area with my cot?" "er, no, people have to pass through there to use the restroom" "i seeee"
anyway they told me they couldnt house me because suddenly they were full. i looked at a checklist for rooms that they had ppl sign and some but not all of the room numbers were highlighted. and at the end of everyone signing their names none of the nonhighlighted regions were signed except for where i signed my name next to 'cot'. a day after they told me to leave because they were full i asked my friend to call them and check if they were full, and they gave them the same answer they gave me, that there were a few openings in the upper bunks.
i talked twice in private with the most empathetic looking humans i could find that i thought the other people were turning me out asap (instead of after 45 days which was their printed policy) because of discrimination. and they both said that it was because they were full.
this isnt a shelter that really does one-day stays.
--
during my ""intake"":
"this is a christian organization so we have to ask you some religious questions. ~so how do you feel about christian stuff?"
"well christians tried to forcibly convert my grandmother-"
"sounds bad, not something jesus would do"
"..."
"well this is a christian organization so if you are staying here we do require you to go to chapel so i dont want to hear anything about "forcible conversion""
because you, the homeless person, choose to sleep there and consume their resources you see!
i dislike arguments of the form "oh but how could be horrible when we give people cookies and fluffy pillows? does that seem horrible to you? i think you are miscomprehending this entire situation somni."
they forced us all to go to christian religious services 2x a day weekdays, 1x a day sundays. and if you missed them 3x they kicked you out. and when an old lady fell asleep during services they poked her and when i said "let her sleep huh? :)" they were like "nuh uh" and poked her some more until she woke up. clockwork orange kinda stuff.
they had a rule about only wardens being able to let people in from outside which i defied to let someone in who everyone knew was staying there, but the warden was on lunch break. she thanked me. i told her these rules were unjust, she would complain to the wardens that everyone would violate rules about eating food in their rooms.
<<May a church or church-run business/non-profit discriminate against me?
Under California law, there is no religious “exception” for discrimination in housing or public accommodations. This means that a religious-based hospital cannot deny you care just because you are transgender, nor can a religious-based homeless shelter refuse to house you as the gender you identify as.  HOWEVER, certain religious organizations and religious educational institutions are not subject to California (or federal) non-discrimination laws.>>
https://transgenderlawcenter.org/resources/know-your-rights/faq-the-gender-nondiscrimination-act
they lied because they expected that i would sue them into oblivion if they told the truth.
--
i want ppl to see the structure of this sort of thing. like the details. its not true that everyone does this all the time. it is actually hard to tell when this is happening.
at this point i am very paranoid about this and i still believed they didnt have rooms with ~10-30% of my heart, enough uncertainty for the test to feel like it could go either way before i performed it. because of the way their body moved and i talked with multiple people in private and they didnt stumble over their words or hesitate.
like i practiced noticing the difference between [peoples words and social affect] and [what they were optimizing for] on homeless people who were less intelligent than me. where they would be like "i am not sexually attracted to you, that would be like being attracted to my child you are like a baby to me" while also feeling up my thigh and back. hear the smooth words and see their disconnect from actions if you took them as veritical.
and after specifically training for discerning this i was still uncertain.
im now even more paranoid about this sort of thing (in an alternate universe where the test failed and the person on the other end of the phone said that there were no open beds this would be evidence against gaslighting and i would update to a human whose coarse features look less paranoid from, i guess, the point of view of someone with less accurate beliefs whose perspective im internalizing in my description because i still apparently have outside-view security holes).
you know i got along fine with the other women in the shelter. lots of them were half-crazy black women and thats relatable. like one of the people was making >100,000$/year before she had a psychotic break and issues with schizo for 10 years. at least thats what she said and i actually belive her.
a cis woman there was threatening to fill a bag with rocks and bash someones heads in as a means of conflict resolution.
only issue was with wardens who saw my id & decided to break the laws of this state to follow the laws of their religion. remember when emma was there with me and i said she was a transsexual too and they were like "its not illegal" yet they acted like it was because they wouldnt house me and lied about why. throughout all of this, except for once, they called me "she" and "her" and yet acted like i was a ~violent male~.
spent the first 20 minutes of "intake" "processing questions" crying because they were being transphobic and processing it by making wry replies to their questions wasnt enough to parse through this. i was crying when they took my photo and entered me into their database as part of "processing me".
the missionaries took great interest in my native american ID.
--
i initially walked up to the building on the mens side and people prevented me from coming in and escorted me to the womens. because sex segregation. and then i go to the womens side and they see my id and suggest that i go to the mens!!!
its important to see beyond the surface level emotional performances, to be able to conduct tests that discriminate between different possible optimization targets.
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