#everyone cries at weddings

[acourtofquestions]

We finally got a Maasverse wedding😭🥹

[casually-eat-my-soul]

I’m just picturing bilbo talking about courting habit of hobbits to the company (maybe ori was asking questions idk) and he off handily mentions that hobbits court via food.

Cue the company wondering that if them eating his entire pantry and him letting them means something. This increases into an argument wether over whose the better dwarf. (Not that any of them are planning on doing anything but they were trying to figure out how to let Bilbo down and it spiralled into who was the best)

“I have better hair”

“I’m a BETTER FIGHTER”

“Well I can cook, Hobbits like food and lots of it.”

Thorin is silently stewing but can’t say anything. That is until Gandalf says that the courting only counts if the hobbit themselves cooks the food for you and serves you. (He thinks the drama is hilarious and wanted more entertainment)

The entire company then remembers that only only person he technically served was Thorin with the soup he cooked.

This only makes the fighting worse, and makes Thorin more smug. Fili and Kili are outraged

“We’re both royalty and younger and more attractive. What does uncle have that we don’t”

But they use this against him when he’s being rude to bilbo “oh be careful uncle, he might trade you in for a better model”

Balin is overjoyed because bilbo is persuasive and politically smart and doesn’t like gold. Dwalin doesn’t know whether to clown on Thorin or be scared over his future as a royal guard because bilbo is somehow worse than Thorin when it comes to death defining stunts.

The rest of the company still argues up until Thorin and bilbos wedding whether or not bilbo was counting them as well. They also make bets because or course they do.

Gandalf takes great, great pleasure in claiming credit for bringing the couple together but honestly he was just looking for entertainment.

[kindred-spirit-93]

i have acquired a new muffin

good evening tumblr i found myself a new babygirl. giggling sobbing going insane. the whole 9 yards. hes just like me frfr its unreal

spencer reid from criminal minds is my new wife. fell in love after seeing him for literally 3 seconds in a garcia and morgan video lmao. i have like 17 reid videos queued & am currently watching and holy frick this man and his mind. i am absolute toast. never stood a chance

me atm pls stand by fdsadfdsf

[reyesstrand]

:-)

[iceinherheart-kissonherlips]

Jesus, he thinks, something is wrong with us, we are unwell, no one has ever felt any of this without destruction. Empires have fallen like this, he thinks, but it only makes him want her more, makes him look at his hands and think, My god, what a waste of time doing anything else but holding her. What a waste, and then he says aloud, JesusfuckingChrist what have you done to me? And she says, Kiss me.

He kisses her, thinks, Go on, ruin me. Wreck me, please. 

She kisses him back and she does. [x]

[ratmans-notebooks]

u all literally piss me off so bad

[scootersscooter]

The dynamic between Horace, Alan, and Oliver actually eats me alive

[oneshortlove]

Was just a witness of a last minute wedding for my sister and her (boyfriend of many years and father of their three children) now husband. Was weird but sweet💝

[liass-21]

ok i’ve spent like the whole day thinking about ethan & benji’s love languages . and idk i didn’t come to any solid thoughts except for the fact that i think words of affirmation are like the opposite of ethan’s love language. like i think he has a hard time expressing himself. he still says i love you a lot, but it’s not as much as benji (who, i think says a lot of things all the time), but it’s hard for ethan to say more than that. because there are just so many things he feels so intensely that it’s almost impossible to put them all into words. and also u kno vulnerability shit. but yeah. idk your post about his vows was just !!! that’s the time when he takes the time to say all the things!!!! bc it’s so important!! and benji knows how much ethan loves him and ethan shows him in so many other ways but to hear all of that?? hear ethan say all those words!!?? idk it’s very special.

no because YEAH you get it YOU GET IT

i’m literally stuck on the ethan vows because i just *know* he’d be emotionally stunted on them for a while but he knows how big of a deal it is to Benji and wants to make it good for him

he’s also so touched when Benji gives him the most beautiful proposal and like UGH we all know ethan hunt can never leave enough alone so he just wants to do him justice :(

i think ethan’s typically more of an actions-over-words guy and i love writing him all snuggly as a way of showing affection but i just *need* this one vulnerable speech from him i just can’t seem to capture what i’m trying to capture so far :’(

[cultivating-wildflowers]

one week and 1200 miles, familiar faces and new friends, excessive crying, an unfortunate mistake with a baguette, and one of my dearest people is married

[rotzaprachim]

the thing about the infamous rogue one wedding alternate ending - apart from the fact that only one guy who once worked on TWILIGHT seems to think it was real in any way, and then APART from the fact that six years later diego luna personally described whatever jyn and cassian had as a “union that would go on forever” - is that it makes bananas, bonkers, over the top NO SENSE as an ending to rogue one, but works in fantastically interesting ways with andor, which is interested in community, religion, and ritual as forms of resistence because existence alone is a form of rebellion, which ended with a community-wide funeral. 

[sunnytaimi]

Not sure why but something I've noticed I've been doing a lot since I started recovery is that when I go out during a particularly bad body image day I'll impulsively compliment almost every woman I know in any way that I can

[adiadagaki]

smitten!sukuna becomes even clingier after your night together in his chambers. Tucking your head beneath his chin, he keeps his arm wrapped around you all day as he lounges on his throne. And you, well you’re occupied by the new diamonds on your finger.

smitten!sukuna watches you in amusement as you twist your hand in order to reflect the light off of the jewels, content knowing you would soon be his wife.

smitten!sukuna who cant get enough of you excitedly telling everyone you come across you are engaged, standing behind you puffing out his chest and a grin on his face.

smitten!sukuna who revisits his wedding plans and deems them unacceptable. His reason, it just isn’t grand enough and you deserve better.

“Ryo, I don’t know what I want in a dress. That’s why I wanted to go shopping.” You complained, a small pout on your lips.

He didn’t get this was such a big deal for you, one of the most important parts of the wedding and you didn’t want to have it up in the air for months only for you to hate it.

Sighing, Sukuna slumped back against your pillows, a contemplative look on his face, the word ‘no’ not in his arsenal.

smitten!sukuna hears you out and comes up with a compromise that leaves you beaming and his chest warm.

smitten!sukuna who fucks you in missionary the night before your wedding.

“Feel that princess? Feel how deep inside of you I am.”

Taking your hand, he places it on your lower stomach, his own on top, and pushes. You moan, feeling every time his cock fills you to the brim, driving you towards your nth orgasm of the night.

“Gunna make sure you still feel me when you walk down that aisle tomorrow.”

smitten!sukuna who loses all sense of reality when you walk down the aisle towards him, a blinding smile on your face, altering his brain chemistry forever.

smitten!sukuna cries when you say ‘I do’

Part 1 Part 2

[yanderenightmare]

Gojo Satoru

TW: nsfw, noncon, yandere, somnophilia, unconsciousnes due to drinking

fem reader

Thinking about a love-sick but scummy Gojo and his cute kohai—how you don’t usually drink and how he has to carry you to his dorm when you start to hang on the walls of the graduation party. It’s been his last year, and he can’t believe he won’t be able to see your pretty face every day moving forward.

“This is fine, right?” he asks softly, laying you down on his bed. His breath thickens while looking down at you—so cute—all sound asleep.

You really shouldn’t be a sorcerer. Curses and curse users and other sorcerers the like would only take advantage—they’d all want a piece. You’re a little silly, aren’t you? You know that he can’t always be there to look after you, right? Oh, they’d eat you alive without his help, you know that, don’t you?

He’d kill anything, anyone, and everyone if something ever happened to your cute little face.

He straddles you, lifting your skirt carefully—so slow and silently, in reverence—like he’s lifting a wedding veil, uncovering your cute cotton undies. His tall form sags forward at the sight—blushy cheeks dusted with dew, looking down at you with half-mast misty eyes.

So cute, so cute, so cute. He should give you his babies. That would keep you home and out of harm’s way—soft and safe behind lock and key and a thousand seals, both keeping others out and you in. Oh fuck—what a good idea. You’d look so right all round with his kid.

He’s already pealing down your underwear. Bearing your pretty little cunt to his searing blue eyes—gleamingly bright with want.

So so so cute!

His pale and slender fingers can’t help but reach out and touch at once—though carefully—sliding his fingertips through your slit.

 “Aw~ you’re so wet~” he awes in endeared glee, already catching your hole and slipping one of his digits in. He all but cries over how snug you are. He knew you were a virgin, but to toy with it in grasp, to feel it wrap around his finger all so tightly, was almost too much for him to handle. 

“You were acting so shy earlier—so coy,” he continues. “But my six-eyes saw it anyway, plain as day…” Pumping you on his digit, he watches you curl in your drunken sleep—a pretty little moan leaving you all so softly. It makes him giggle with delight. “You’ve wanted me all along, haven’t you?”

♡ GOJO SATORU masterlist ♡ JUJUTSU KAISEN masterlist

[airybcby]

જ⁀♡⊹｡° and he keeps a picture of you

( bllk boys x gn! reader )

♡ a/n — been MIA for so long i wanted to write something small ans cute :)

♡ word count — 1k

♡ content — yukimiya kenyu x gn! reader, sae itoshi x gn! reader, alexis ness x gn! reader, rin itoshi x gn! reader, all characters are 18+, just cutieness , engagement (yukimiya), childhood lovers (sae), nickname 'love' used (ness),

♡ synopsis — some bllk boys (yukimiya, sae, ness, rin) and what their phone lock screen is :)

⊹｡° yukimiya kenyu

out of all the boys, yukimiya kenyu is the one most likely to have the cutest picture of the two of you as his background.

everyone gets sick of him bragging about your relationship, just how perfect you are, how sickly sweet you are to him.

yukimiya changes his lock screen every week, and of course he has to show them off to his team.

most of the time, it's a picture of you two holding hands- or you two in matching outfits that yuki had chosen himself.

everyone on his team had gotten tired of him showing off his perfect life and amazing relationship.

while, if you held down long enough, yukimiya's options for a lock screen weren't limited.

one was of you sitting across from him at dinner- a win glass in front of you as you gave him a smile. 'because you look like a dream in this' he'd told you when you asked why that one was his new lock screen of the week.

another of you asleep on his shoulder, a clear patch of drool showing in the picture. 'i wanna wake up to this every morning' he'd justified.

and this weeks lock screen, hm? well, it's his personal favorite.

a photo of you jumping on yukimiya while the two of you are dressed in another set of matching outfits. to anyone else, this may just look like his average screen saver.

but to him, and anyone who looks hard enough, the shiny new ring on your left hand ring finger is a clear sign; yukimiya finally asked you to marry him.

this one wouldn't be changed for a while.

not until he saw you in your wedding outfit.

⊹｡° sae itoshi

everyone of his nosey fans always wonders...what is sae itoshi's lock screen? flashes of it had been shown at press interviews, but no one could figure out what it was.

for a week on social media, fangirls (and guys) were stopping interviews for the tiniest glimpse at his phone. eventually, after coming to the assumption that he was a bland man who simply left it on the default lock screen, the internet calmed down.

and was sae a calm man who usually didn't change things that were fine as is? yes.

but what no one knew, what no one would ever find out, is that sae itoshi had a secret life- one secret from the press and internet- only for him to have and hold.

you.

you had been his girlfriend since he was 14, yet he refused to let the world and its nosiness ruin a perfect thing.

he was careless during the singular press interview, his phone in view- he was just lucky that the quality wasn't the best because then everyone in the world would know; sae itoshi was utterly whipped.

his lock screen, you ask? it's the only one he has set- and he'll never change it.

it's a simple picture of you on the balcony of your shared home, the sunset illuminating you perfectly as you looked over your shoulder at him with the most stunning smile on your face.

sae itoshi wouldn't let the world ruin that smile.

ever.

⊹｡° alexis ness

for the first year you were dating ness, his lock screen was a picture of him and kaiser in their uniforms- their last names stretched across their backs.

was this insane to you? yes. but you knew how much kaiser had changed ness' passion and love for soccer, and that's all you could be grateful for.

so when you grabbed ness' phone one morning to change the playlist while the two of you made breakfast and saw that he changed the background? you almost cried.

was it silly to be so emotional over? sure. but you knew how much kaiser meant to ness- he possibly loved him more than you (joking) (no i'm not)

the picture was so cute and innocent- the lock screen now a picture of you in a magicians get-up with cards in your hand.

you'd done it for ness' birthday, for his love of magic- you'd learned to do a few card tricks and he laughed at you as you tried ( and failed ) to shuffle- the cards flying everywhere.

when he realized the music hadn't changed , ness looked back at you - his pink apron wrapped around him, "everything okay, love?"

yeah.

everything was perfect.

⊹｡° rin itoshi

refused to change his lock screen when you started dating.

he was perfectly fine with the default one, why should be have to change his phone set-up just to prove his love?

in his mind, that was silly.

he loved you more than (almost) anything, except soccer.

let's be serious soccer was a very close second when it came to you, but rin would never admit that- his dream of becoming the best striker and his ego too high to say that.

he didn't understand why people needed their significant other on their lock screen. they'd see them everyday, was one picture really that important?

he thought that until he walked into your shared bedroom one day after a long day and a hard fought win against Manshine City.

all he wanted to do was take a shower, eat dinner, and lay down with you.

then he saw you, curled up on the bed wearing his jersey.

he told you not to wait up for him. you couldn't attend the game in person due to work, but he didn't mind. you were with him always.

but seeing you, fast asleep with his last name on your back- he finally understood.

he could look at this scene for hours.

he grabbed his phone out of his pocket and quickly snapped a picture before he slipped into bed next to you.

he suddenly didn't need a shower and he wasn't hungry.

he just wanted to be near you.

when you woke up the next morning while rin was on his morning run, you grabbed his phone to check the time

your sleeping face met your gaze, and a smile that probably looked so goofy spread across your face.

rin had never seen the point of changing his lock screen

until he saw you with his name on your figure.

suddenly he wanted to give you that last name for the two of you to share.

may make a part 2 , be on the look out :)

likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated!

[neovillains]

like a pornstar : gojo satoru ─── click the star for supplemental visuals ( a p!rn link )

amateur pornstar!gojo that makes it big with solo videos on onlyfans. him masturbating on camera, whether it was using a fleshlight or jerking himself off with his fist ( ★ ). he was faceless and it really called in a good fanbase from the start. his viewers loved the mystery, the allure of it all. (they also liked his pretty cock and long it is.)

the more his fanbase grew, the more platforms he continued to build himself on. tiktok, he posted faceless thirst traps and shirtless videos. teasing plenty of women and men with the outline of v-line and strikingly white happy trail. shower videos where water was streaming down his back, he had 5.4 millions likes on one particular one where he nearly flashed people at the last second. (he doesn't understand how the video hasn't been taken down yet.) the popular social media platform only made him bigger.

his instagram comments are all filled with thirsts. and while it's a more mundane approach there, giving people flashes inside his personal life, he has everyone imagining what a future with him would be like.

until he starts bringing someone on camera with him.

no one thinks anything of it yet until they start seeing your face on a regular basis. slowly are his videos no longer solo ones and the title of them always seem to involve you somehow. tiktok videos start including you, you plastering kisses down his neck in the shower, and your bare back is being shown in his get ready with me videos.

you're tagged in each and every one of his videos, and while people would love to hate on you. they can't (because they realize the repercussions is getting blocked by pornstar!gojo himself). they realize that their favorite pornstar is very serious about this relationship and this is not some sort of project. and fuck, the couple videos are so fucking hot ( ★ ).

amateur pornstar!gojo is so serious about you. every thrust inside your aching pussy is laced with love, enjoying the way you cry and mewl around him ( ★ ). and while the envy is still there, it's overwritten with their lust as they can't help but get off to it. even though they can't see your face either, you just seem to be the prettiest person taking amateur pornstar!gojo's cock.

and when one picture is posted one night, it has fans in an uproar. your left ring finger adorned in a simple band and stone that looks so good against your skin tone. when they slide to the next image, it's you and him your wedding attire. the last picture of him laying in between your legs, his back marked up in red as the silk, baby blue sheets cover his bottom half, the internet cries over the events.

later that same evening, a video is posted on twitter. a little snippet of him kissing your sweet pussy and on pornhub and onlyfans, his last video titled, goodbye ( ★ ).

people are disappointed that they've never gotten a face reveal from either one of you.

( subscriptions. ) @r0ckst4rjk @blcknebula @tojirin @clqxuds @dreamingoftomorroww @s-1-xx @lotuslovers @mutsu422 @twinky-wink @levkuna @des-todoroki @for-hearthand-home @nanasukii28 @paintingchoso @strawberriesrule @w2twoo @stargirl-mayaa @ratedrrrr @gojoswaterbottle @princess-vibes25 @ravenbc @inzanekillian @saik-k @sukunaspillow @serendippindots @iveivory @explodingkittensss