#every single time I open mY NOTES?????????

[karinamariee]

celibate

pairing: drew starkey x fiancé!fem!reader

summary: you’re as innocent as it gets, promising celibacy. but when your boyfriend drew comes into your life, you can’t help but yearn for him.

warnings: smut w plot, mdni!!

authors note: this is my 100 follower special, plus it is such a hot idea, i love it

—————————————————————————

drew first was admired by you when you stepped in one of his acting classes, taking him by surprise. it wasn’t your face (though it was beautiful) or your body (which made him instantly hard), it was the fact that you walked into the acting classes, dressed in all pink, and you walked into there with such kindness and respect that drew immediately needed you.

it took drew months to get you to go on one date with him, it was actually fucking with his pride, but he didn’t give up. eventually, you ended up going on a romantic date with him where he brought flowers and your favorite (though you never told him, he just assumed) chocolates. how could you say no to that?

but oh, when drew kissed you for the first time, he knew he wanted forever with you. he knew he wanted to get married, to have children, to grow old together. he wanted every single flaw, insecurity, fear and pain, and he would take that and throw it all into his heart.

he had just wanted all of you.

so he asked you any question under the sun like: “what’s your favorite color?” in which you answered pink. “who’s your favorite music artist?” in which you said gracie abrams. “what’s your favorite thing about yourself?” eyes. “why do you wear pink all the time.” i love wearing pink. all those questions were answered, and he immediately knew, you knew how to not be shy, being as open as your are.

by the time three months hit, he got down on both his knees, arms wrapped around your torso, cheek on your belly, your hands in his hair, and telling you how much he loved you. your response had been what he needed: you loved him too.

by ten months, you had been able to sit in silence, enjoying each others company.

by one year and a half, you two both officially moved in with each other, finally planning your life together.

by two years and three months, he proposed to you in which your answer was yes.

everything seemed perfect, but one thing kept on flashing in drew’s mind, and oh did he feel so dirty. he always wonder what it would be like to see you naked, bent over the kitchen counter, fucking you from behind as you moaned his name. so when he did think of those thoughts, he would shake his head.

“are you a virgin, y/n?” drew got the courage to ask one night.

you turned to him, closing your clothes drawer, and you walked to him, standing on your side of the bed.

“oh,” you said, “i guess i never told you this. im celibate, which means—“

drew quickly crawled over to your side, grabbing your waist, resting his head on your belly. “i know what it means, babe. it was just a question.”

but it got harder and harder for him, having seeing you in those mini skirts and dresses, seeing you in heels, seeing you change, seeing you do anything turned him on so much he had to jerk himself off in the bathroom.

but little did he know, it was hard for you too.

—————————————————————————

“please,” you whispered, “make sure to go slow. i’ve never done this before.”

drew snorted. “don’t worry, baby. you’re gonna have the best time with this.”

you nodded as drew took his cock out of his underwear, throwing them to the side. you looked down and audibly gasped.

“it’ll fit,” said drew, “trust me.”

he slide himself inside of you very slowly. going inch by inch, listening to when you told him to go. eventually he started thrusting slowly in and out of you. you got into the rhythm of it, moaning when he was at a perfect pace.

“fuck, baby. you feel so good around my cock.”

you moaned loudly at that, pulling him closer by his buttocks. you couldn’t get rid of this feeling he was giving you. he was so good at this, so good that he threw his head back, going faster, but not that much.

“faster,” you demanded.

“fuck.”

he quickened the pace, hitting that spot that made your toes curl, your head throwing back into the pillows. you had never felt a feeling like this before.

“drew…”

“fuck i’m close.” drew said.

you moaned loudly, scratching on his back as he quickened the pace, on a mission. he repeated himself over and over again and you started whining, tears falling down your cheeks.

you came all over his cock, toes curling, never feeling like this.

“i guess you’re not celibate anymore,” said drew later that night.

you laughed, turning to him. “i love you.”

“i love you too.”

[wtfaniii]

oneshot in-ho x reader whos a player not bc of debt but because she was investigating with gi-hun? in-ho falls in love w her and protects her during the games (he knew abt her as he had stalked gi hun and his team duh)

thank u🙏🏻

Just when I read this I had just uploaded a one-shot more or less with that theme of the researcher girl.

I love it, thanks for reading🤎

Part 1 Part 2

Paparazzi

Summary: A private detective that Gi-hun had hired to investigate those games he participated in three years ago, is taken against her will without knowing that a certain man with power and money knew absolutely every detail about her.

Warnings: Just some harassment from this sexy man, violence and inappropriate language. Also, I made a modification to one of the games so that the reader could be with them

Note: Your wishes are my command! Orders will remain open and I will try to respond as soon as possible.

Her job was supposed to be just to do some research, collect names, dates and addresses, but fate had other things in store for she.

—Form lines to advance! It will be harder for the puppet to detect you that way —Gi-hun shouted to the players who were still alive after that massacre.

The girl was shaking uncontrollably. Unfortunately, she hadn't managed to get behind someone and now the doll was in her sights. Her hands didn't stop moving and clearly noticed how one of the weapons from heaven was pointing at her.

—Please... —She whispered shakily, yeah... maybe she was a coward but it's only because survival is not his specialty.

"Player 455" heard one of the guards through his communicator, he aimed directly at the head of the trembling girl but before pulling the trigger he heard the voice of his leader "Don't shoot, let her continue" and without protest he obeyed him order.

In a gilded room, with a huge screen in front of a single sofa and a small table next to it, rested the man who led and maintained order in these games.

Drinking a little more whiskey, In-ho kept his eyes on the screen and with the remote control he focused on player 455, the poor girl was terrified, it was not the first impression he expected from her after having read her entire file.

He had read that she was a great detective, top of her class, she was cunning, intelligent, and had a couple of master's degrees completed, but seeing her afraid of dying almost made him laugh.

It was amazing how being face to face with death changed people.

—Nobody shoot her —he added over the radio without taking his eyes off the screen.

He could see the girl's confusion at seeing thatwas still alive despite moving very slightly.

In-ho knew everything about her, he knew what she was weak on, her strengths, weaknesses, her way of operating, he even knew about that beloved cat she had in his childhood and died of old age.

He had taken the time and dedication to investigate even the smallest details about her, it was the least he could do after almost discovering his identity.

The detective was so close to discovering the entire empire of these games that he had to be her brought together with Gi-hun by force so as not to let her finish the task.

He twisted his lips as the whiskey vanished and the first game, green light, red light, was over.

He didn't want her dead, or at least not for now, until he knew a little more about her, one could almost say that she had the potential to be part of this if she weren't so correct.

He put on his mask and went to the control center.

[...]

Just as she thought, some players approached Gi-hun for advice for the next game, there were only those who believed in his words because some others called him a 'liar'.

Among them was player 001, whose name was claimed to be Young-il. He was no fool, he wouldn't say his real name without being sure how much information she had about all of this.

As night fell in the bedroom everyone was sleeping peacefully, except for the girl who was sitting in the middle of her bed playing with his pillowcase, folding it over and over again and then unfolding it and repeating the same act.

—Are you having trouble sleeping? –001 asked, approaching her, who shifted a little and made room on the bed for him to sit next to her.

—My head works better at night... —She murmured, looking at him and smiling friendly.

He looked down at her hands and how the moved on the pillowcase, her were precise and firm. —You know how to tie good knots.

She had many talents and In-ho knew them all.

Or well, almost all of them.

Her ability to tie excellent knots was developed by her father, who was captain of a fishing boat that she also sailed on from time to time.

They locked gazes again in silence. In-ho considered that long-distance photos were nothing compared to being face to face with her. For two years he had been investigating her, he had sent several guards to follow her closely for one reason only. At first considered her a threat. Her intelligence and curiosity could have unmasked him, but then he started following her out of routine.

Afterwards he just kept his gaze on her out of habit and finally he had her face to face.

—What's wrong? —She asked with a frown as noticed the intense gaze on his person.

—Nothing, you should rest, we must have energy for tomorrow's games.

When he was about to stand up and go to his respective bed but she stopped him by holding his hand. The girl, seeing his inappropriate act and with more confidence than she should have, quickly let him go. —Can we keep talking? Honestly... I'm too distressed to sleep right now.

—Of course...

The two continued to talk about trivial matters for a couple more hours, they tried to keep it low so as not to wake up the other players but every now and then they received an annoying 'shhh' from someone nearby who longed to be able to sleep peacefully.

Until she finally fell asleep with head resting on In-ho's shoulder, he didn't move, instead, he let her sleep and settled down so they could both rest better.

The next day, during the next game, they formed teams of six people.

Once they were all together, along with a pregnant woman named Jun-hee with the number 222, they sat on the floor as ordered and shared the games.

The activity was to play a series of games and each time they won they could advance, all this with their feet tied together.

It would be simple, each one was good at something and that made it easier for them to continue, they were the last players to participate which was good for the girl, so she wouldn't get nervous under the gaze of the other participants and as if heaven conspired in his favor one of the games was about making a rhombus with a rope.

—I did it! —She shouted euphorically showing the perfect rhombus in her hands made with rope and on the first try, the guard made a circle and the voice said "pass"

The others celebrated with her as they advanced, until now they achieved the games at the first opportunity and had plenty of time but when they reached the part where they had to spin a top on the ground Young-il lost his sanity after so many failed attempts.

As she bent down to pick up the top once more and wrap it in the string 001 began to curse and beat himself.

—What the hell is happening to me? I can't do anything right! I'm useless —She looked at him startled every time he hit himself, until she interrupted him by slapping on the left cheek, managing to silence him and making his head turn just a little.

In-ho's fake drama to scare them was going great until this sudden blow happened, he didn't expect it but there he was, looking at her with surprise and astonishment.

—You have to calm down! —She shouted, handing him the already finished top. —Try it again and if we die I swear I'll kill you.

He nodded and took the toy, she used those words to lighten the mood and try to give him confidence (which of course she did) but eyes don't lie and her gaze begged him to do it, she didn't want to die.

Miraculously he managed to spin the top and they moved on to the last game which Gi-hun was about to lose if it hadn't been for In-ho, although the last move was not correct he shouted "he did it" this being a small order camouflaged for the guard to give the affirmative signal.

They didn't know it but at that moment they would have died.

She was ignorant of this, she didn't know that if it weren't for In-ho she would already be dead since "green light, red light"

Unwittingly, In-ho saved her at every opportunity, protecting her life without realizing that perhaps following her had already become more than just a routine.

Little by little she got under him skin, first it was in his mind and now...

[nuemanfilms]

CAN FEEL YOUR EYES

s.w

summary; Sam cosplays as a firefighter for a job you’re all working, and you can’t keep your eyes off him.

warnings; smut, piv, softdom!sam, dirty talk, sweet talk, semi-public sex, praise, fem!reader, panties pulled to the side, against the wall, unprotected sex (don’t do that, pls), creampie, overall just really sweet, messy, fluffy sex.

notes; surprise, surprise. After a few months, i finally cooked you guys up something. happy late new year, enjoy <3

wc; 800+

It wasn’t the first time you’d seen Sam cosplay for a case, usually in a suit and tie, or a police uniform — it varied depending on the case at hand.

Firefighter? That was a new one.

The elder had managed to clear the house out, leaving you and Sam to investigate the top floor, where the fire supposedly started. Well, Sam was more focused than you. You were too busy lost in your own thoughts about what you could do in that little amount of time alone.

The floorboards creaked as he pushed the bedroom door open, his hand gripped on your arm and pulled you inside the doorframe. You looked up at him in confusion, “Sam, what are we doin-“ He cut you off, turning the lock shut on the door.

“I can feel your eyes on me, you know that, right?” The confusion that painted your features quickly turned to embarrassment. Your cheeks tinting a light pink hue as a teasing smile curled on your boyfriend’s lips.

You didn’t know where you got the boldness from to smash your lips against his, but you did. Sam’s eyes widened briefly, the flashlight he held fell to the floor with a thud. His hands moved to lift you up, pinning you against the wall. Your lips never disconnecting once as you both hurried to rip off each other's clothing.

“Baby, c’mon-“ Sam groaned, his fingers snapped the clasp of your bra, letting it fall to the floor. The heavy metal that clipped his belt was undone as quickly as you could, pushing the leather out of its loops.

Once Sam had pushed your panties to the side, he slid his middle finger through your folds. You let out a gasp, “God, you’re fucking soaked, Honey.” Sam commented, a shiver ran up your spine at the coldness of his touch lingering on your flesh.

The head of his cock nudged at your entrance, Sam’s hand teasingly running his tip up and down your slit. You whined pathetically at his teasing, a smug smirk replaced the smile he held before.

Sam’s hand steadied on the side of your hip as he pushed in. Your head tossed back against the wall, your lips parted to let out a noise, but you couldn’t. This wasn’t your first time with Sam, but it felt like it every single time you did.

Sam cooed in your ear, urging you to lower your fingers down to your clit.

“Shh, shh. Don’t make a sound, baby… you’re doing good for me. So good.” He hissed out, feeling you squeeze around him at the praise. Sam gave you a few moments to adjust, waiting for your nod of consent.

You nodded, “You can,” your words left your lips more breathy than you intended. Sam snapped his hips, sliding out of your channel, and then thrusting back in. His free hand slapped against your mouth to muffle the cry you threatened to let out, “Don’t. make. a. sound. I don’t want anyone else to hear or see you, just me, understand? You wanted this, right?” His tone was rough, but there was no real malice behind his words.

The low groans and muffled moans were the only noise in the room beside the sound of his hips slapping against yours over and over again. His hand lifted from your lips, shushing you, before he trailed his fingers down to replace yours. The pad of his thumb pressed firmly down on your pearl, rubbing in tight circles to encourage you to let go.

“‘atta girl, there you go… So good, Sweetheart, aren’t you? Taking my dick like this, when we could get caught any second. You’re being so quiet too, honey… so fucking good for me, shit.” The way your body reacted to everything he did, his tone, his hips, just himself in general made his eyes roll back. The stamina he held for you drove you insane.

You could taste the metallic on your tongue, your lip held a bruise from how hard you were biting it. Sam let a few whimpers slip past, but not too loud. He could feel you getting close, your body getting limp against him. It caused his own hips to stutter themselves, “You can do it, I know you can. Cum for me, please? Cum all over it, baby… I know you have it in you.” The white shocks rushed through your body like electricity.

Sam’s hips slowed, but kept a pace steady enough throughout your orgasm. He groaned, a moan following him after as he came undone. The grip he held on your hip loosening, yet he still held you close.

Your heavy breaths filled the silence of the room, his lips littering soft kisses all over your face and your neck. The coos he gave you were so gentle, so syrupy sweet despite the dirty words he said just a few moments before.

“Hey, hey… c’mon, let's get you cleaned up, yeah? Good job, Sweetheart.” He smiled lovingly at you, letting you wrap your arms around his neck as he carried you to the nearby bed.

[hvnlygrl]

hii can u do rafe cameron

can u pls do soft!rafe cameron or soft!jj maybamk where reader and him get into an argument and then he storms out and then the next morning reader gets her period, and when he comes home he just sees her lying on the bed eith a heating pad so he decides to make her a cookie skillet with nutella in it and ice cream on top of it and when he gives it to her she immediately starts sobbing and covering her face with the back of her hand telling him how shes so sorry and that she wished she never foughr with him and then he just comforts her and helps her eat while they watch a movie

i take it all back.

pairing — rafe cameron x fem!reader

word count — 1.3k

warnings — lotta cussing, reader gets a little mean, argument between rafe/reader, hurt/comfort.

synopsis — after a fight with rafe due to your hormones during that time of the month, he goes out of his way to make you feel better.

notes — sorry i kinda went in a little bit of a different direction with this i hope that's okay! but the general idea is still the same... thank you for the request! it's such a sweet idea <3

it had never bothered you before, the sound of rafe on his game in the spare bedroom, but for some reason the loud sounds of him on the headset with his friends were driving you up the wall while you tried to watch your show in the living room. 

you sighed out in annoyance when you heard him for what seemed like the 20th time in 5 minutes, “GO! WHAT ARE YOU DOING??? TOPPER GET HIS ASS!” 

you clicked the volume up on the t.v. in front of you, head beginning to ache from the loudness of the show mixed with the loudness from the game room. you were unsure of how to handle the situation. you didn’t want to ruin rafe’s fun on the game, and you surely didn’t want to start an argument with him but you couldn’t take it anymore. 

you paused the show, stood from the couch and stomped your way down the hallway. you didn’t bother knocking on the door since you knew he wouldn’t hear it, instead opening it as soon as you reached it. “rafe,” you called out. no answer. he continued clacking at the keys on the p.c., shouting orders at topper and kelce over the headset. “rafe,” you called out again, quite a bit louder this time. still no answer. 

at this point you were fed up. you were unsure of where the blind rage came from, but before you knew it you yanked the headset from his head. 

“what the-y/n? what the fuck are you doing?” he shouts at you, his eyes flitting back and forth between the computer screen and your angered expression. 

“can you shut the fuck up, dude? i’m trying to watch my show,” you grumble at him as if it's obvious. 

“woah,” he cocks his head back at your statement, “chill out.” 

now you’re really pissed. “don’t tell me to fucking chill out!” 

“babe, it’s not that serious,” he continues clacking at the keys on the game. 

“it is that serious. you try watching your favorite show and listen to me hooting and hollering from the next room. it’s fucking aggravating and i can't take it anymore right now.” 

rafe rolls his eyes. “i don’t know what you want me to tell you, y/n, it’s really not that serious. i’m doing my thing and you’re doing yours. you don’t see me busting through the door to get on your ass about the t.v. being too loud.” 

you can hear the oohs and ruh-rohs coming from the headset, only adding fuel to the fire. 

“oh my god, dude, can you just act like a fucking adult for five minutes? you don’t have to play fortnite every single night with your gay ass homeboys. maybe you could spend time with your girlfriend instead of being on the game from the second you get home until hours after i fall asleep.” 

“that is so not true and you know it, bruh.” 

“if you’re gonna play the game and not even interact with me, then just go do it at your own damn apartment. i’m not fucking dealing with this right now. i have a migraine and i don’t want you here tonight.”

rafe can't ignore the pang that shoots through his heart at your words. “seriously? you’re kicking me out?” 

“yeah,” you mutter softly before leaving the room and heading back to the living room. cramps begin overtaking the muscles in your stomach, only adding to your agitation. you breathe out shakily, your throat beginning to tighten as you watch him grab his bag and storm out. 

once the door slams behind him, a wave of guilt washes over you, your eyes watering as you smack yourself for kicking him out. all you wanted was for him to stop being so loud and now he’s on the way back to his apartment, pissed at you for embarrassing him in front of his friends and for sending him home.

you lie down on the couch, allowing the tears to stream freely as your thoughts get darker and crueler toward yourself. you sob deeply, arms wrapped around a pillow until you finally fall asleep. 

about an hour or so later you wake up, shuffling into the bathroom, you notice your appearance in the mirror; cheeks puffy and eyes swollen from crying. the sight only makes you feel worse. you sit on the toilet, letting out a harsh sigh when you notice the blood that pooled in your favorite pair of panties. after already feeling like a piece of shit both physically and mentally, here was mother nature three days early, ready to screw you over even more. 

you couldn't help but tear up again at the inconvenience, suddenly realizing what happened tonight. you wanted to slap yourself for being so stupid and not noticing the signs, but you knew that it was too late now. after heading to your bedroom to find a new pair of underwear and shorts, and spotting the dirty pair before throwing it into the wash, you head back to the living room. 

your heart beats in your throat as you pull out your phone to text rafe. 

after the conversation with him you felt a lot better about the situation, but you were still feeling pretty upset. you rummaged through the kitchen, checking the cabinets and the fridge and freezer for any type of food that would satisfy your cravings. of course, you had absolutely nothing that would help. you sighed as you shuffled back toward the living room, opting to just lie on the couch and watch your show until you fell back asleep. 

you knew the thought was dramatic, but you couldn’t help but wonder when your life turned into this; alone in an apartment that was too big for you with nothing you wanted and no one to share it with. 

and then you heard a knock on the door. despite it being his signature knock, you couldn't stop yourself from checking the peephole, heart fluttering when you saw the blonde on the other side of the door.

you quickly opened it, a soft smile on your lips. “what are you doing here?”

“did you really think i was gonna let you be alone on night one?” rafe raises a brow at you before revealing two grocery bags he’d been hiding behind his back. he had made a run to the local store for all your favorite sweets, chips, icecream, drinks, and anything else he could think of. he even bought you a heated stuffed animal that could be thrown into the microwave and used as a heating pad.

“baby,” your lips curl down into a frown, eyes watering at the gesture, “you’re too nice to me.” 

“of course i am,” he chuckles as he sets the items down on the coffee table, “you’re my girl.” 

you watch in awe as he grabs your favorite cup, fills it with ice and pours your drink into it. then he grabs the stuffed turtle (your favorite animal) and heads to the kitchen to throw it into the microwave for a couple minutes. 

“get comfy, babe,” he calls out to you, “get your show set up, do whatever you gotta do.” 

you smile at him sweetly. “you didn’t have to do all this, rafe.” 

“i know,” he shrugs nonchalantly. “i wanted to.” 

“thank you,” you whisper when he brings the warmed turtle over to you. you moan happily when you stick it onto your lower abdomen, the sensation immediately easing some of the pain. “i don’t deserve you.” 

“sure you do,” rafe huffs as he kicks his shoes off and gets comfy next to you, “how many times have you taken care of me? saved my ass without me even thinking to ask you for help?” 

you nod, “yea, i guess you’re right. i’m sorry about what i said earlier baby, i take it all back.” 

“don’t stress,” he holds his hands up, “water under the bridge, my girl.” 

you smile at him, admiring his features before turning your gaze back to the t.v. and snuggling in closer to him. “i love you.”

“i love you,” he parrots back, hand rubbing at your lower back in the spot that he knows typically bothers you. 

-> back to masterlist

taglist — @lanasb0ngwater

[secondsistershelby3]

WILL THEY KNOW?

Pairing : Young!Silco x Felicia’s sister!reader

Summary : Your sister was so cheerful, confident and sometimes sarcastic, sometimes you even felt inferior but she didn't want to make you feel that way and you knew it. The biggest problem is that you had a crush on one of his friends, Silco.

Warnings : !LIGHT SPOILER S2!, smut, 18+, semi-public sex (I know I'm a whore), getting caught in the act, Vander's balcony takeover (oops), fluff

Notes : I'm a whore for Silco, it’s stronger than me

"But why do I have to come?" You asked boredly as your sister dragged you through the streets of Zaun "because I want you to come too, period" Felicia replied with a neutral look and continued to look forward

You snorted even louder since he wasn't about to let go of your wrist, it's not that you didn't like going to The Last Drop, on the contrary, Vander was very nice, he almost seemed like a father, a father figure. The problem was Silco, every time you had him next to you in your belly you started to have a thousand butterflies in your stomach, you started to burn and almost stammer and you couldn't think straight anymore.

"and Connor?! He wasn't available?" I asked, still whining like a little girl. Felicia didn't answer for almost ten seconds and then she spoke "no" she wasn't bold but almost cautious.

"ooohhhh that sucks" less than two minutes later you were at the entrance to The Last Drop

"Good evening guys" Felicia exclaimed with her arms in the air, like a theatrical entrance. You on the other hand entered with a more awkward walk and a face somewhere between angry and insecure. "Look who's here again," Vander said with a smile as he cleaned a glass. Silco, on the other hand, only turned to look at Felicia and made a single nod.

You were hiding behind her and probably neither of them had noticed you yet. Felicia looked behind her to look at you and smiled "Look who I brought" she moved and still in a theatrical way pointed at you with both arms. Vander smiled looking at you "hey little girl, long time no see" he said it in a cheerful tone, as if to replace an 'I missed you'

"yeah, but I don't really like going out" I said it in a slightly shy tone, you weren't very good at conversations, but you tried to do your best. Silco stood there looking at you with his mouth half open and his cup in his hand, until Vander gave him a light push "um...it's nice to see you again" he pronounced your name in such a suave way, pronounced by him it was as if it were gold to sell

"Come on, come and sit down" Vander invited. You headed towards the desk and took a seat next to Silco, as soon as he looked at you you smiled and he smiled back almost spontaneously.

When you turned around, you didn't see Felicia sitting next to you, you moved your gaze to look for her and saw her in front of the jukebox "what are you doing?" You asked but he didn't answer. Suddenly 'Our Love' rang out in the room.

"What is the occasion?" Vander asked. “Can't a woman want to listen to a song?” Felicia asked moving her hips a little to the rhythm Vander laughed "not this woman and not this song" in the meantime he put away the glass he was cleaning

As the song rang in your ears, you turned to watch Silco write in his notebook, his locks coming out of his ponytail, hanging in his face. You felt that feeling of butterflies, tremors creeping up your whole body. The feeling overwhelmed you so much that you didn't realize you had been watching Silco for a while.

"Do I have something on my face?" Silco asked sarcastically, looking at you with a smirk "I- no no you're fine, I mean not that you're never fine, you're always fine obviously-" Silco's giggle stopped you from babbling "I got the message, girl" you remained with your mouth half open as you watched him go back to writing with a smile on your face.

Your half-open mouth turned into a closed-mouthed smile. What interrupted your thoughts full of rainbows and hearts was Vander who placed four glasses on his balcony "mind full of love?" Vander asked laughing as he poured the drinks into shot glasses "what?! no no no, I don't!-"

"ok, calm down little sister, you'll ruin the peace of this place" Felicia said laughing putting her hand on your shoulder you huffed and slammed your red face against the balcony as you felt Felicia sit down next to you

You heard Felicia laugh out loud at your reaction. You didn't hear much of what your sister said next, you were too focused on getting yourself together.

You raised your head and hand to grab a shot glass Vander had left for you and took a sip

“I’m pregnant” you spat the drink out in front of you and started coughing, you felt a hand pat your back trying to get you to breathe properly again. You didn't even see Vander replace Felicia's drink with juice.

"this wasn't really the reaction I was expecting" Felcia laughed looking at you, your eyes were wide as you looked at her and your eyes were a little red since you almost choked a few seconds ago. Felicia took hold of her juice as you slowly stood up from the stool. Your sister was about to become a mother and you were an aunt, you were amazed at the calm with which she announced it

“wow, I’m the one who should be delirious” your sister turned to look at you still sitting "no... I'm just... well I don't know how to describe it, shocked but also happy. I just... fuck I've never seen you as a mother" you laughed for the first time today "I'll take that as a compliment" Felicia sneered.

In the meantime Silco had closed his notebook and approached the three of you with the stool

you aunt...

you aunt...

Felicia mother...

you aunt

Felicia mother

WOW.

"Are you there?” you heard Felicia call you, you hadn't even noticed that she had gotten up and was walking towards the exit "let's go" "

I...I think I'll stay a little longer to clear my head" Felicia shook her head and laughed "okay but don't be late, idiot 2 has to close" you laughed at his statement

"stay as long as you want" Vander smiled at you and started to go to the back "where are you going!?" you panicked knowing that you would have to be alone with Silco, it appealed to you on the one hand but on the other you knew that you would stutter more than anything else

“fuck…” you hissed, placing a hand on the side of your head Silco drank his drink while turning his gaze towards you

"I've seen you upset all evening, something's wrong?"

YOU, YOU

"I...I absolutely don't, I mean I don't know it's just very hot, and then for the news, but, but everything's fine seriously" you said everything so quickly, gesturing and scratching your head and the back of your neck.

"are you sure it's just that, because once I saw you alone with Felicia and you were so at ease and then I see you with me: you're nervous, you're tearing them apart and you're more nervous" Silco placed his chin on his hand while he he moved closer and closer with the stool

You tried to speak but nothing came out of your mouth "Did the cat get your tongue?" Silco laughed in the same position.

“I don't know what you're saying-" You started to turn your head but his bandaged hand grabbed your chin. “don’t mock my intelligence” you saw his face move closer to yours quickly.

Silco stopped a few millimeters from your lips "may I?" he asked You nodded uncertainly and suddenly some fireworks that only you could see went off. You felt Silco's thin, warm lips on yours. He placed his other hand on your cheek, leaning forward on the stool

You pushed Silco back slightly, as good as it felt, "what if Vander comes back or what if Felicia comes back?" “We'll make it quick, they won't know” he put his hand that was on your chin, on the back of your neck to bring you closer and placed his warm lips on yours again.

You were always uncertain, you were never able to make decisions, but it was the time to do it, right? This time you didn't hold back, you tried to deepen the kiss, even if you weren't expert but it came almost naturally to you

Silco put his hands on your hips and jerked you up "what...what are you doing?" You asked between kisses. His hand moved behind your back while the other remained on your hip and he suddenly pushed your back against the desk. "this" he smiled. The hand that was on your hip quickly moved under your shirt.

Your hands had moved seconds before to his shoulders but one moved more securely to his pigtail, ready to untie him "can...can I untie them?" Silco moved his face away from yours slightly and looked into your eyes “of course you can” his voice had become huskier than usual. With his approval, you let down his black hair, it was definitely lovely.

The hand that was under your shirt moved to your bra covered breast. Your hands rushed to grip his hair. You had never been touched by a man, you had always had a crush on Silco, so this was more than exciting

You both stopped in your tracks when you heard noises coming from the back. "fuck...it's better if-" "We'll make it quick, I promise" Silco interrupted you

His hands quickly went to your pants and you copied his movements by unzipping his, all while the two of you resumed kissing. Silco's hands quickly pulled down his trousers, just to be able to perform the act. “it will hurt, as much as I want to avoid it I can't, stop me immediately if I hurt you” you nodded slowly as he lowered his open pants.

Before long the cock was inside you, you suddenly hugged yourself to him as you moaned "shit!"

You didn't see Silco smile at your reaction. After seconds you got used to that feeling of filling, Silco's hips began to move slowly until they picked up speed, each thrust slammed against the balcony making noise and with each thrust there was either a moan from you or a grunt from him.

“fuck, fuck…” Silco hissed as he placed a hand on the balcony behind you.

You were almost about to come but something or rather someone stopped you

"Christ! You guys get a fucking room!"

You snapped your head up and turned to see Vander with his hands on his hips and turning his head. Your face turned red as a tomato and you pushed Silco away and immediately pulled up your pants. He on the other hand was so calm as he pulled up his pants and laughed at your reaction

"I had just cleaned it" he huffed putting the rag on his shoulder

You rushed to the exit without saying anything.

“Are you leaving without saying goodbye?” Silco's voice called you with your hands at your sides you turned towards him uncertainly, you took hesitant steps towards him who had his hands crossed and his hair still loose and disheveled. You waited a few seconds and in a thousandth of a second you gave him a kiss on the cheek and quickly left the bar.

"congratulations idiot 1"

"thanks idiot 2" Silco was still looking with loving eyes at the exit you had passed through a few seconds before

[depressedcoffeeobsess]

╰𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐝𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚 𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐞.ᐟ

Pairing(s): James Potter x fem!Reader

Summary: James would do anything for a date with you.

Warnings: none!

Word count: 680 words!

Note(s): Im loving the picture on the right side :)

:the question and answer are both from google

THE MARAUDERS WERE sitting at the library. Rare sight really. Well it was no doubt that you'd seen remus at the library. Fifth year kicked in hard with the owls so near. You and lily were working so hard, that you both decided to take a break.

You took your seat infront of James, with a book in hand. This was the break for you. Though Sirius merely doubted that. Lily had gone off to find books. You were currently reading your charms book.

“hey, will you go out on a date with me?” James was always asking you to go out with him. You considered it for once but never again.

“I've already told you my answer Potter,” you would say it every time. “and if you don't already know it's no”

“come on.” he said it in a kind of a sing a song tone. “just once, please” oh for the love of merlin.

You could tell remus was already regretting his life. So instead of that you started a bookworm conversation with him. You loved remus (no not in that way) because he was the only one you could properly relate to. You both loved talking about extra nerdy things going out in hogwarts.

“will you go out with me now?” James was starting to get a little irritated because of Remus. He didn't like watching people talking to—his future wife—you. This occurred especially when Remus was talking to you.

“no” you said blankly. You didn't want to hurt his feeling but you also didn't want to go through break ups and all that drama. You weren't one for drama like that.

“please?”

“no”

“please?” in a desperate tone

“nope” popping the ‘P’ out.

“please?”

“oh fine!” James’ eyes lit up. “on one condition...”

“and that is?” he was quite eager now. Sirius and Remus were just too shocked to not be letting flies into their mouths. You had said yes to James out of all the guys in a line for you.

“answer this question and I'll go out with you” typical nerd.

James huffed. “why is it always about studies?” he was getting bored now. (Not of you)

“because you need to study to get a good career,” you were smiling all the way. James and Sirius mentally rolled their eyes, while Remus was nodding. You were pretty confident he couldn't do it. You pretended to flip through your charms book just to find a paper with pre wrote questions. You looked at them and glanced up at James, smirking evily. “Explain the difference between a Crucio and an Imperio curse.”

“uh, funny thing,” he laughed nervously. “Is that wormy I see there pads?”

You sighed and mentally face palmed. “seriously? Are you that dumb? That was a basic question!” (this line was for you rese)

“fine if you're so good why don't you answer it y/l/n” James looked like he was pretty confident too. His ego was obviously at it's fullest.

“Crucio causes extreme torture, while Imperio puts the victim under the caster's control” you seemed like you were reading out of a book. You had your eyes closed and a finger pointed up.

James' mouth went open. His jaw dropped to the floor. “I obviously knew that” he huffed.

You rolled your eyes and set of to find lily. James' eyes followed your figure until it turned to the corner. James sighed.

“do you think she'll go out with me?” he asked this question normally.

“No”

Sirius and Remus said in unision. They were tired of James asking them a single question all the time.

“Mate, maybe she'll go out with you once you've actually read a single page of that book” Sirius didn't read either. He was just there to be James' hope.

“who likes reading these days?”

“apparently she does” remus muttered as he went back to his potions book.

“dont worry the woman will have to surrender one day!” Sirius exclaimed brightly. Honestly he was just making it worse, according to Remus.

As they usual banter on the marauders was playing in the background, you were smiling to yourself. Maybe you would consider going out with him next time.

Bonus +

James was blabbering to Peter about how good his day went. “and then she was about to say yes!” you were. “she was?” Peter was horrified for you. “yea! I wonder how our children will look like” he said dreamily. “if you ever have any” Remus muttered.

[awrkive]

smut + 14 + tlp!jk WHAHSJJSNSKSJSSJ I lowk feel like jk would b a little silly this line 😆

14. "I am your daddy."

note: lmfao anon u r right and u should say it

wc: 0.9k

warning/s: c*nnilingus

“Slap me.” 

“What the fuck?” 

“Just not too hard,” you insist, already feeling a little restless with the cuffs around your wrist. It’s cold and you’re butt naked and Jungkook hasn’t even taken off his pants yet. 

But Jungkook just incredulously responds with, “No, I’m not gonna slap you.” 

“Don’t be a pussy,” you roll your eyes at him, nudging his thigh with your foot. When you dig your heel in his crotch, Jungkook catches your ankle and positions your leg back to the mattress with a “tsk.” You whine. “Jungkook.” 

“What?” He says with mock emphasis as if he doesn’t have you spread out for him right now. He did just make you cum, though… but the way you’re tied to the bedpost right now is making you feel a little raunchier than usual.

“If we're doing BDSM and shit, you need to be a little mean.” you say. You bite your lip when Jungkook runs his fingers through his hair in that weirdly sexy way. You’ll never tire of thinking that he’s extremely attractive and that he's yours.

“Baby, I can’t believe I’m telling you this, but you’re crazy if you think I can ever lay my hand on you.” 

“Ugh.” You groan sarcastically. “Fine. What do you suggest then? You’re the one who wanted to try out the cuffs, mind you.” 

“So? I just wanted to eat you out.” He retorts. “With cuffs.” 

You pout. “I thought you were finally going to reveal you have some sort of a daddy kink…” 

Jungkook can’t help but chuckle. Unbuckling his belt, you bite your lip as you watch him slide it out of the loops and throw it on the heap of the floor, zipping down his pants and pulling it down with his boxers all the way off to reveal his cock. It’s engorged and red already, with precum shining to attention.

The metal clunk when you made a move to reach out, and only then do you realize that you’re restricted to any arm mobility as of now. Which makes you frown. 

“Do you have a daddy kink?” Jungkook throws back the question at you, stroking his cock. You're focused on that before he leans down on your chest. 

Your breath hitch when he peppers kisses down the perk of your breasts, a moan escaping from your lips when he wraps his mouth around your nipple, quick to alternate between sucking and licking. 

When Jungkook fondles your other boob, your head lolls backward, eyes rolling at the sensation. 

“I-I’m not sure. Never tried it.” You say, focusing on the movement of his tongue. 

“Uh-huh,” Jungkook furthers his mouth down your stomach, making your eyes snap open. You look at him, at the curls on top of his head, curious to what he’ll do next. When he holds your waist, he murmurs, “Pretty girl,” It tickles, the way he leaves ghosts of his kisses on your skin, but when his lips touch the heat of your core, you sigh with content. “Pretty pussy.” 

“Oh.” You moan when he licks at your lips, his tongue quickly coming back for more and hand pinning your waist down when your begin to buck up. 

Jungkook’s never been shy about being an avid fan of your pussy and eating it any time of day but he always manages to render you speechless at how much he likes doing it, because he performs it with such purpose; tongue licking every crevice and mouth sucking every slick, and when he inserts his long fingers in your aching, wet hole, you keen just like every a few minutes ago and every single time. 

“Fuck.” You sigh out, already feeling another wave of orgasm when Jungkook speeds up. The sound of spit and slick is lewd and vulgar to the ears, but you couldn't care less, not when you’re close to cumming. 

“Baby– oh god–” You thrash in the cuffs, knees shaking at your impending release. With Jungkook’s two fingers sliding in and out of your pussy and his tongue sucking your clit simultaneously and with your inability to hold anything, you suddenly feel like crying. “Kook, oh my god, slow– slow down, please–”

But instead of doing just that, Jungkook speeds up even faster, and that nearly flies you off the edge, can feel yourself cumming when–

“Jung– what the fuck?” 

You look at Jungkook in offense when he suddenly comes up, cutting your release. Nevermind the fact that he looks like literal sin with your juices all over his mouth and chin – the damn guy just stopped eating you out just as when you were about to cum. 

Jungkook shrugs coolly, and if it wasn’t because of the cuffs, you would’ve jabbed at his chest by now because the audacity? 

"You want me to be mean, you said,” his lips curl up playfully. “I’ll edge you a bit. Then you can have my cock... when I want to. How’s that sound?”

Your face contorts into confusion and realization and there’s a weird feeling in your stomach because you want to knock at his head but also… it’s kinda… hot? 

You purse your lips.

Jungkook decides to add, “I’m your daddy now.” 

You deadpan. 

What you don’t expect is Jungkook immediately laughing just right after he said that. 

“Alright, damn, that sounded way better in my head.” He snickers, and you can’t help but feel a little silly too. 

“Jungkook.” you half-whine and laugh. 

Jungkook leans down to kiss your mouth, and you can feel his hard dick nudging your thigh at the action. Cupping your cheeks, Jungkook looks at you for a few seconds then kisses you again. 

“I can’t be mean to you. You’re my baby.” He purrs and as if he can’t get enough, he pecks your mouth again. 

You jut your bottom lip out to not laugh. He takes it as another invite for a kiss.  

“You’re a sap.” You tease. 

When Jungkook breaks away (not without kissing you again), he looks at you with a proud smile. “Damn straight.” 

[scarletttries]

Baldur's Gate 3 Companions With a Shy GN!Reader...(Baldur's Gate 3 Request)

Request: " Can I request for Baldur's Gate 3 companions with shy gender neutral s/o please?"

Pairings: Astarion x Reader, Wyll Ravengard x Reader, Gale Dekarios x Reader, Shadowheart x Reader, Karlach x Reader

Author's Note: Thanks to everyone who sent in requests and has been reblogging my Baldur's Gate posts! Consider me open for any BG3 requests, let me know if you want to see more headcanons like this :)

Astarion:

- At first Astarion would find it hard to reconcile your shyness with his understanding of the way people behave. He would be suspicious of you initially, wondering why you insist on playing your cards so close to your chest. It wouldn't be until you finally warmed up to him and started to talk a bit more that he realised that this quiet tone to you is actually very endearing to him.

- When you two get together he would feel very proud to be the person you speak to the most. Astarion can be a little insecure sometimes so knowing that you choose to talk to him despite being selective with who you speak to would mean a lot to him. It would help him to trust you more too, knowing the the deep bond between you is almost a secret that you would never dare whisper to anyone else.

- Astarion loves being able to communicate with you with just a sly glance or a single whispered word, the two of you often having entire conversations without saying a word to those around you. When you need to talk your way into somewhere Astarion's always happy to do the talking, but he can't help but be impressed with the way you can navigate through a room quiet and unnoticed.

- As a partner Astarion needs more reassurance than he ever likes to show, so knowing that you'll go against your shy instincts to whisper a flirty thought or a sentimental memory to him when he starts to look worn out always boosts his spirits. He didn't know how much he needed someone just like you in his life until you became a core part of it.

Wyll:

- Wyll never shies away from the public or a spotlight, announcing himself as he enters almost any room, so when he meets someone who prefers to listen to those around them instead of interrupting, he'd become very interested in what you have to say. He'd make the effort to get to know you even if it didn't happen as naturally as sometimes other bonds have come to him, but as he worked to gain your trust and attention he'd never regret a moment of time spent getting you to warm up to him.

- When the two of you are together Wyll will never miss an opportunity to sing your praises, no matter how bashful it makes you! He needs you to know how amazing and appreciated you are, as he can never tell if you fully recognise your own brilliance.

- Wyll falls in love with the way you think before you speak, listening to every part of his story and really considering everything he tells you, never jumping to an assumption as so many people in his life have. He finds your accepting nature makes him a better man, and in return he only grows a deeper fondness for the way you carry yourself.

- As a partner Wyll always needs someone to be there for him, listening and reassuring, and he really finds that partner in you. He's never felt more loved and respected as he does when you give him the time and space to work through his feelings and history, the quiet stillness you bring to his life letting him find a peace he's never known before.

Gale:

- Gale has spent enough time studying magic at scholarly institutes to have met more than a few shy souls in his past, so when he notices you playing the shrinking violet he knows exactly how to give you all the time and space you need to finally share a bit of yourself with him.

- He knows that the most important things to hear usually come from those who don't speak unless they have something to say, and there's no exception to that in you. He really gives weight to everything you share with him, every opinion you pose, and every compliment you reward him with through flushed cheeks and nervous laughter. It only makes it that much sweeter that you don't dish out such comments absentmindedly.

- Gale also enjoys using a bit of your shyness against you, gaining a certain amount of satisfaction from being overtly flirty in public once the two of you are well into dating. He can't help but smile at the way you shy away from his loud declarations of love and the flirty comments whispered far too loudly across a tavern. His heart practically bursts when you try to hide your face in his hands when he's being far too vocal about how beautiful he finds you in front of the rest of your companions, and not a day goes by that he doesn't remind you of that fact.

- Thankfully he usually waits until you are alone to let his adoration pour out in his gentle words and touches, enjoying that while he can be a brash as he wants in public, he can feel your true appreciation in the quiet you spend alone. His life has held more than one dramatic chapter, so having someone who loves him so sweetly and mutters his name so softly when they praise him really means the world to Gale.

Shadowheart:

- More than anyone else, Shadowheart can appreciate the desire to keep parts of yourself hidden behind some firmly closed doors. She finds herself drawn to your quiet personality as the rest of the party are a bit boisterous for her taste, often favouring the seat beside you at any given campfire, knowing her boundaries will be respected, and any conversation made will be worthwhile.

- Once you two are together, she sees you as a respite from the endless questions of the outside world. The two of you can spend hours in comfortable silence together, only your interlocking fingers letting the other know you are still there. You give her the space to think through her decisions, but at the same time she knows that if you choose to speak up then she really should consider listening to what you have to say.

- Shadowheart finds herself more able to share pieces of herself with you, as you open up at the same gradual pace that she does. You don't rush to tell her everything or bombard her with questions like the others. Instead she'll often finding you waiting outside her tent at first light when she rises, offering her a hand for a quiet stroll through the forest as you softly tell her a tale from your childhood and she tries to imagine herself growing up alongside you, in a sweet version of her life she could almost convince herself is the truth.

- Shadowheart doesn't fully know her past, but with you as her partner, her future finally starts to come into focus, all because of you.

Karlach:

- Karlach has been loud and brash since the moment she could speak, so at first she thinks your shy demeanour is a sign of rejection of her friendship. It's disappointing that you don't want to talk to her, but she's not sensitive enough to worry about what every single person thinks of her. It would be endlessly frustrating to you that you have to really put yourself out there, making every effort to be by her side and forcing yourself to respond to her every remark to try and let her know you really do like her. In the end you'd just have to ask her to dance at a celebration with the rest of the group, and when she laughs and says she thought you didn't like her, please prepare yourself to tell her you like her so much that it makes it genuinely hard to talk sometimes.

- Once Karlach understands the concept of shyness and that it is not a personal affront to her, she will be very happy to do all the speaking for both of you. Every journey you take across the lands she will gladly fill the silence with every thought and tale, celebrating loudly every times she manages to make you gasp or laugh along with her.

- Karlach will take a lot of pride in the thought that you like her so much that you are almost rendered speechless, and get quite jealous when she realises you are being shy around other people too. Worried that everyone will be seduced by your strong-silent type behaviour she would definitely insist on holding your hand as much as possible, or loudly shouting across combat that you and her are an item just in case anyone was getting the wrong idea.

- While your personality might have started as a bit of a mystery to Karlach, once you two really know each other she'll come to highly value your way of carrying yourself, learning a few things about protecting herself from undue influences, while keeping herself open to the important people in her life, like you!

[moralesluvr]

FABLE AND TRUTH 2 | billie eilish

୧ ‧₊˚ love was the law & religion was taught…. ↳ summary: you had always been raised on being poise, feminine, classy. but what was most important to your family was your religion— and it had embroidered itself into your daily life. but when it’s time to pick between feelings and faith, which will you choose? pairings & aus. billie eilish x fem!reader warnings. religious backgrounds & guilt | mature language | sexual content | substance use author's note. chapter two is here !!! wc. 5.4k

you could not stand drunk people. 

well, unless they were your best friends. 

after emma had dragged you out of the party, she stumbled against you, babbling on loosely about how some guy at the party was trying to flirt with her— and in less harsh words than her own, he wasn’t the most attractive. 

he had begged her for a dance and even offered to buy her as many drinks as she wanted, whatever the price— but she kept politely refusing. until he grabbed her and tried to kiss her, which definitely ended with his hand over a bruised and bloody nose, and every single curse word under the sun had come from emma’s mouth. 

oliver was nowhere to be found, but he’d checked in on the life360 that he was at some guy’s house, and that’s really all you needed to know. 

jules and naomi stubbornly filed out of the house soon after you and emma retreated to your car, the red-head fanning herself as she slumped over the front seat, “oh m’gosh…y-y/n….think i’m literally gonna fuckin’ hack right about now.” 

you let out a quiet groan as the car door opened, your two remaining friends falling into the backseat and carelessly tossing their purses into the empty passenger one. naomi held her head, while jules tried to cover her stained lips with a tattooed palm, “h-hey…we couldn’t find you…at all.” 

you couldn’t even be annoyed at them for being intoxicated, because you were the one that promised you’d attend the party, only as the designated driver. and you being you, you were always there for a friend in need, especially the people that you loved oh so dearly. so you cranked your car up, turning your queued worship music down, sliding your right arm over the passenger seat to back up, “guys, please please do not throw up in my car. i just cleaned it!” 

that statement earns painful groans from the three girls in the back, holding their stomachs as you sped off and onto the main road, carefully. you placed both hands on the wheel and tried to drive as slowly and heedful as you could, partially afraid that the night would end with vomit on your undyed seats and lipstick stains on your seat covers. but you took a deep sigh and looked in the rearview mirror, “anyone feel like they need to pull over right about now? please tell me now, i don’t really feel like cleaning throw up.”

“please….the diner on….just pull over.” jules swallows thickly, and you watch as the other two bold-haired girls nod at her statement in agreement. you swivel into a turning lane abruptly, tired eyes fixated on the sign that reads “GINA’S DINER.” it’s quick the way you pull into a spot, apologizing for how recklessly you turned into a spot— but you really needed to make sure that no one was going to ruin your clean car. 

you all file out, naomi nearly falling as they all hurriedly make their way towards the door, their heels clacking against the pavement as you locked your car and followed them in. 

a bell above you makes your appearance known, and you give the lady at the front an awkward, slightly apologetic wave. she doesn’t understand your gesture until she sees naomi, jules and emma rush towards the bathroom, stomachs clutched and faces washed with sickly expressions. 

“fun night, hm?” she asks you, southern accent so strong that you almost can’t understand what she’s saying. you just shrug at her, slipping into a front booth as you pull out your phone, eyes droopy and slightly achy. there’s a Bible notification, and you can’t help but smile, even in the midst of all this. it’s a verse from psalms, something about finding refuge in the Lord during chaos. you could definitely use that right about now. 

you tuck your phone into your lap and breathe deeply, letting the soft hum of the diner soothe your nerves. the air smells like coffee, bacon grease, and syrup, the kind of mix that shouldn’t be comforting, but is.

your friends are loud even from the distant, dingy bathroom, their laughter carrying through the thin walls as they recover from the night’s bad decisions, and it’s all masked quickly as you hear three in tune gags. 

you shake your head. 

emma’s voice cuts through the noise, something about how she could’ve totally taken that guy out even harder if she wasn’t wearing heels. jules and naomi laugh, and you imagine their glossy lips curling into wide smiles, mascara smudged and carefree.

“refuge in the Lord,” you mumble to yourself, tracing the edge of the laminated menu on the table, your finger settled on a plate of hash browns that mistakenly look like a cross, but you’re sure that it’s a sign. you smile to yourself as a waitress approaches— mid-50s, with tired eyes but a warm smile. “long night, sweetheart?” she asks, pouring water into a glass in front of you.

“you have no idea,” you reply with a small chuckle, rubbing the back of your neck. “but they’re my people, you know? i love them with all my heart.” 

the waitress smiles knowingly, nodding toward the bathroom. “i get it, honey. not many would be the driver for that crowd, y’know, but you’ve got something sweet on you. you’re a kind soul, i can tell.” 

you laugh, genuinely this time, glancing toward the bathroom door to make sure that they’re still in there, “thank you. and yeah, they’re a mess, but they’re my mess. couldn’t go through life without them.” 

she doesn’t really respond. she just places a coffee cup in front of you, even though you didn’t order it, and pats your hand sweetly,  “on the house, sweetheart. looks like you could use it.”

the warmth of the mug grounds you as you watch the bathroom door finally swing open, after what felt like absolute years. your friends spill out, looking slightly less disheveled, faces cleaned up but eyes still glinting with the remnants of the night’s mischief. they weave through the diner, collapsing into the booth with you like puzzle pieces falling into place.

“dude, holy shit,” emma groans, leaning her head back against the booth. “that bathroom was a war zone. i honestly deserve a real-life award for surviving it.”

“you deserve an award for not throwing up in my car.” you deadpan, and that earns a round of weak laughter, the waitress sharing a portion of it as she disappears into the back. you were serious, but your joke was light-hearted, and you slump your head against the cool surface of the table, letting it sooth your slight headache. 

“should we order pancakes?” naomi blurts, her lipstick hastily reapplied, and she cracks open a mirror to set it with a thick, pinky gloss, “i think we all need some pancakes.”

“and hashbrowns!” jules adds, pointing at the menu as if you’re about to argue. it was late— nearly three o’ clock in the morning, and you refused to drive these girls home and pay for a meal you knew they’d only eat half of before hauling to the bathrooms again. 

you just shake your head, sipping the coffee. it’s too bitter for your liking, but the caffeine jolts you enough to sit up a little straighter, “fine, but one of you better be paying. you guys are driving me absolute nuts.” 

emma’s hand shoots up dramatically, her movements still a little sluggish, but way better than before. “it’s all on me. it’s the least i can do after saving my own dignity from that creep earlier.”

you raise an eyebrow at her as naomi and jules snort, “pretty sure dignity doesn’t include nearly breaking someone’s nose, em. that was mean.”

“oh no, you weren’t there. he completely deserved that shit.” she says firmly, twirling her finger in the air like she’s drawing a halo over her head.

you lean back, letting their chatter wash over you like background music. emma’s wild stories, jules’s dry wit, naomi’s quiet observations— they all blend into something that feels like home. you’d never say it aloud, but moments like these are what make the late nights and exhausted mornings worth it.

still, as you glance at the phone in your lap and reread the verse from psalms, there’s a nagging thought in the back of your mind. something about balance. about faith. about how these nights with your friends, full of chaos and laughter and the occasional Bible verse for grounding, somehow fit into your life.

you love them. and you love God. but sometimes, it feels like both are pulling you in opposite directions, but tonight, in this diner, they coexist. the coffee is too bitter, the pancakes will probably be disgustingly dry, and your friends are a complete mess, but for now, it’s enough for you.

before the food comes, the three girls beside you decide that they need to make sure their stomachs are empty enough to eat, so they all get up, rushing to the bathroom and leaving you with just your thoughts. you distract yourself with some game on your phone before the bell above the door jingles again, and you glance up absentmindedly, thinking it’s just another group of drunk strangers coming in for some late-night pancakes. but it’s not. it’s billie.

and she’s stumbling. horribly. 

“oh, please kill me,” you mutter under your breath, straightening in your seat. as if on cue, emma, jules, and naomi all file out the bathroom, turning to look, their chatter dying down as they notice her too. she’s wearing extremely oversized jeans and a tank top that clings to her in a way that feels like it should be illegal, her hair slightly tousled, like she’s been through a windstorm— or, more accurately, a stupidly wild party. 

she’s got a girl and two guys with her, but they venture off somewhere else to slip quarters into an old jukebox, cursing loudly when they realize that the device is way outdated. you snort. you thought that was obvious. 

“isn’t that your girl?” emma teases, leaning over the table with a sly grin. she pokes your shoulder and you immediately shove her off, your cheeks hot and angry with a blush that blossoms to the rest of your body. 

“she’s not my girl, don’t say that.” you hiss, your but your statement’s really all bark no bite, per usual. but your heart skips a beat when billie looks up and locks eyes with you, her face lighting up in a way that’s both charming and disarming.

she weaves through the tables with all the grace of a baby deer, her steps uneven but determined to get to you. she drawls, her voice low and slightly slurred, “what are you doin’ here, angel?”

“billie…” you sigh, your voice tinged with exasperation and a little disappointment. after your conversation at the party, you had assumed that she wasn’t the type of girl to get drunk and stumble around, and it hurt you a little bit to realize that you were mistaken. 

“oh, don’t ‘billie’ me,” she says, sliding into the booth beside you, much too close for comfort. the scent of tequila and her vanilla perfume hits you like a wave, and you lean back instinctively, pressing into the seat. but she mimics your actions, her shoulder pressed against yours as she slurs, badly. 

“you’re drunk.” you point out, trying to keep your voice steady, but it’s broken. your skin’s hot and furious, and you can’t quite place why— all you know is that you’re mostly disappointed. your friends’ voices grow silent as they watch your encounter with the dark haired girl, and she just shrugs her shoulders at you nonchalantly. 

“m’kay,” billie drags, looking up at you with soft, hazy eyes, and you swallow thickly, “maybe a little.” 

she admits she’s had a little too much to drink, flashing you a lopsided grin. her finger comes up to boop your nose, but she’s so intoxicated that it misses it by an inch.  “but m’not too drunk to notice how cute you look right now.”

your friends exchange looks, barely suppressing their laughter. emma actually has the audacity to nudge jules, whispering something that makes them both giggle, and you feel embarrassed. you shoot them a glare, but it’s hard to focus when billie’s gaze is fixed on you like you’re the only person in the entire diner.

“billie,” you say again, this time softer, almost pleading her to stop making you look stupid in front of your girls, “you should…you should just go sit over there.” you gesture vaguely to the empty booth across from you, but she doesn’t budge.

“nah,” she says, resting her chin in her hand as she looks at you, and you take a good look at her, your eyes involuntarily narrowing. she looks like she’s been through it— skin glossy but dull, lips chapped and dry, her voice croaked and broken. she’s slow with her movements as she sinks further into the chair, “i’m good right….right here.”

your pulse quickens, and you don’t know if it’s from annoyance, embarrassment, or something else entirely. “billie, you’re making this really weird.” you mumble, your fingers gripping the edge of the table to keep yourself from touching her. 

“weird?…h-how’s it weird?” billie leans in slightly, her voice dropping to a playful whisper, “i’m just complimenting you, angel. that’s not a sin, now is it?”

your stomach twists uncomfortably at the mention of sin. of course, that’s where your mind goes. because everything about this feels…complicated. billie’s close enough that you can feel the heat radiating off her skin, and her eyes— bright and mischievous— make it hard to think straight. you just want her to go away, to disappear and never look back, to literally never utter a single word to you ever again. but she’s persistent, almost taunting you with her presence, and it’s like you can’t take your eyes off her no matter how hard you try. 

you hate this. you hate it a lot. you close your eyes, thinking and hoping that if you pray it hard enough, she’ll go away. like she’s an illusion, a ghost that’s just here for a distraction. but when you open your eyes, she’s still there, eyes fixated on you as she waits for an answer. 

“it’s not a sin, but…” you mutter, looking away from her gaze, eyes fighting to focus on something else, anything else, “…you’re drunk. you don’t really mean any of this.” 

“who says i don’t?” she shoots back, and for a moment, her tone isn’t teasing. it’s serious, almost challenging, and you want to just get up and walk out. but you can’t. 

your breath catches, and you’re grateful when the waitress comes back with your friends’ pancakes, breaking the tension. billie doesn’t move, though. she just keeps looking at you, like she’s waiting for you to say something.

“billie,” you try again, your voice softer now. “please. just…sit over there, okay? we can talk when you’re sober.”

she hesitates, her eyes searching yours, and for a moment, you think she might argue with you. but then she sighs, running a hand through her hair. “fine.” she says, dragging herself to her feet. “but only ‘cause you asked so nicely…so, see you around…”

she winks lazily at you before sliding into the booth across the aisle, and your cheeks burn as your friends erupt into laughter the second she’s out of earshot. your head turns sharply to look at them, and you feel your eyes swell with tears. 

“oh, my goodness, y/n,” emma says, clutching her stomach, mostly because she isn’t sure if she’s gonna throw up, but also because she’s containing so much laughter, “you were soooo red. dudette, she’s totally into you!”

“please, emma. stop it. she’s not.” you protest weakly, your voice barely audible over the girls’ laughter.

but the truth is, you don’t know if that’s true. and worse, you don’t know how you feel about it.

as you sip your coffee and avoid looking in billie’s direction, your phone buzzes again with another verse. this time, it’s one about temptation. you let out a shaky breath and close your eyes, trying to steady yourself, making sure your friends don’t see your tears. but they’re too busy laughing and digging into their food to pay it any mind, and you rest your head down, hoping you could just disappear. to go anywhere— to run and never look back, to hide, to forget everything that just happened in the past five minutes. 

the diner feels like it’s shrinking in on you, like the walls are closing in around you with every passing second. billie’s presence is magnetic— whether you’re looking at her or not, you can feel her. the way her arm drapes over the back of her booth, her carefree laugh echoing as she chats with the waitress, her eyes flicking toward you every now and then, and you always look away before your eyes can meet. it’s maddening.

your friends are still teasing you, of course— they won’t let anything go until it’s dragged out and so annoying that even they can’t stand it any longer. 

jules is practically doubled over with laughter, her face flushed as she wipes at her eyes. “y/n, be so fuckin’ for real right now,” she says between giggles, lightly tapping naomi on the shoulder to tune in, “you cannot tell me she wasn’t flirting with you.” 

“she’s drunk,” you speak again, your voice firm but your cheeks still hot. you wipe your eyes with your sleeve discreetly, blaming it on the air conditioning too high for your sensitive eyes. you sniffle, “it doesn’t mean anything.” 

“uh-huh,” naomi chimes in, smirking as she picks at her stack of pancakes with her fork, “right. and i’m the queen of england. both those things don’t make any sense.” 

emma, who’s been quiet up until now, leans over the table with a knowing look, like she can read something even you can’t. sometimes you despised that— you despised your friendship lasting so long that she could tell what you’re feeling before you even know yourself. she pauses, then gives you wide eyes, “hey…you like her, don’t you?”

“emma, no!” the denial is almost instant, too quick to sound convincing, even to your own ears. 

but you’re sure. 

no matter what, this is utterly wrong, for so many reasons. it’s nothing you’ve ever desired before, and it’s not right, and it’s just something that happens when you see people that are almost unearthly beautiful. man, woman— everyone has eyes, and everyone that can see knows that billie is drop dead gorgeous. but that doesn’t mean anything, it can’t. and it won’t. 

emma gasps dramatically, clutching her chest like she’s been shot, “oh, my gosh! you like the emo girl!”

“i don’t,” you insist, groaning as you bury your face in your hands, “can we please talk about something else?”

“fine,” emma says, but the smirk on her face tells you she’s not letting this situation go anytime soon, “but we’re circling back to this later, girlfriend— just so you know.”

you glance over at billie, hoping she’s too wrapped up in her own world to notice the chaos unfolding at your table, and definitely hoping that emma doesn’t see you do it. but of course, billie catches your eye and grins, her lips curling in that way that makes your stomach turn in on itself. 

you look away almost immediately, focusing on your untouched and horrible coffee. it’s lukewarm now, but you sip it anyway, hoping the bitterness will ground you a little bit. you find yourself caught in your thoughts until naomi taps your shoulder, making sure that emma and jules are too goofed off to notice. 

“y/n,” she says softly, her tone more serious now, “are you okay?”

you nod, even though you’re not sure it’s true. you hated to lie, but it wasn’t any of her business, and you didn’t even know exactly how you were feeling. you huff, “yeah, i’m just…tired.”

that much, at least, is honest. the night feels like it’s been stretched out for days on end, and the weight of everything— your faith, your friends, billie —sits heavy on your chest. you just want to fall into your bed and stay there forever, resting until the sun rises and falls a million times. 

“we should head out soon,” you say, glancing at your phone. it’s horribly late into the night now, and you know you’ll feel this exhaustion in your bones tomorrow.

but before you can usher your friends toward the door, billie stands up from her booth and strolls over to you, and you genuinely want to push her out of the way. but it isn’t like you, it never has been— so you stand idle in your spot by the jukebox, watching billie’s movements that are still a little unsteady, but her confidence is unwavering.

“y/n,” she says, her voice softening, “you leaving without saying goodbye?”

emma snorts, and you shoot her a warning look before turning your attention back to billie, “we were…um…. just about to head out,” you say, keeping your tone neutral. whatever emotion you show, it’ll be talked about in the car, so you try to remain as stoic as humanly possible.

“hmm,” she hums, tilting her head as she studies you. “you sure you’re okay? you’ve been awfully quiet tonight.”

“i’m fine,” you reply quickly, but your voice betrays you, coming out more flustered than you intended.

“you don’t look fine,” billie says, leaning down so her face is level with yours. her proximity makes your heart race, and you’re painfully aware of how close she is— close enough that you can see the faint freckles dusting her nose, close enough that her breath fans against your cheek as you shut your eyes, exhaling slowly to keep yourself calm. she giggles, “well…you do look fine, but—“ 

“billie,” you interrupted, your voice barely above a whisper. “you should sit down. or…go home.”

“maybe,” she says, but she doesn’t move. instead, she smiles, sweet and almost…tender. “but…. not before i tell you something.”

your breath catches, and you feel your friends’ eyes on you, the air around the table thick with anticipation.

“you’re…really something, y/n,” she says, her voice quiet but sincere, “i don’t know what it is, but…there’s just something about you. something good.”

the words hit you harder than they should, and you don’t know if it’s because she’s drunk or because she means it, or maybe even both.

“i—“ you start to say something but it’s too quiet, so you just start to rush out of the diner, embarrassment flooding your face as your friends attempt to follow you. but with the way they’re stumbling and how drunk they still are, their detour to the bathroom is definitely expected. 

as you step outside, the night air is sharp and biting, the cold shocking your heated face. you could stay in and wait, you think— but you don’t have the patience to, and you’re too embarrassed to walk back in and face whatever just happened to you. you’re starting to head to your car when you hear the door jingle opened, and you hope and pray that it’s your trio of girls, but you set your hopes a little too high. 

“y/n!” you hear billie call after you, her voice slurring slightly, but it’s the desperation in her tone that makes you really stop you in your tracks. you pause, half-turning, the diner’s fluorescent lights spilling out onto the sidewalk as billie’s figure emerges into view, her feet tripping over her own oversized clothes as she slumps against the run down, brick wall next to her. 

her jacket’s hanging loosely off one shoulder, hair messy but somehow still perfect in that careless way she always manages. she’s really out of breath, her hands on her hips as she steadies herself, and when her eyes meet yours, there’s a flicker of something calm, something sweet. caring. 

“you’re…really l-leaving?” she asks, tilting her head slightly, her voice dripping nectar as she looks at you, almost like she’s a little hurt at it. 

“yeah,” you reply, trying to keep your tone even, but it comes out shaky instead. typical.  

“i think i’ve had enough excitement for one night. i just want to go home and go to sleep.” 

billie takes a step closer, her jordan’s scuffing against the pavement. she’s hesitant before she speaks, “did i…did i say something wrong?”

the question catches you off guard, and you shake your head quickly. it wasn’t her at all, it was just how she made you feel. her words were too much for you, and the way she was acting— it made you squirm, it was bothersome, icky, awkward. you meet eyes with her from across the parking lot, and you shrug out, trying to get out of this predicament as quickly as you possibly could. 

 “no. it’s not that. i just—” you falter, crossing your arms over your chest, “i need some air.”

she nods slowly, her gaze dropping to the ground for a moment before she looks back up at you. “y/n, i wasn’t trying to make you uncomfortable. i-i just…sometimes i say things when i’ve had a little too much, but that doesn’t mean i don’t mean them.”

your heart skips a beat at her honesty, and you take a step back, trying to put some distance between the two of you.

“billie, you’re really drunk.” you say, your voice barely above a whisper, and the distance between the two of you that you created falls useless as billie steps closer, almost not hearing what you’ve said. 

“yeah, i am drunk,” she admits, a soft laugh escaping her lips, “but that doesn’t mean i’m lying.”

you look away, staring at the empty parking lot as if it’ll give you the answers you’re so desperately searching for. you run your fingers through the ends of your hair, fighting to keep calm. the only reason you don’t walk away and leave is because your friends are still in the bathroom. 

can they hurry up? 

“i don’t know what you want me to say,” you admit finally, your voice cracking slightly as you let out a choked, awkward laugh. 

“i don’t want you to say anything,” billie replies, stepping closer until she’s just a few feet away. “i just…i needed you to know that. you’re cool…y/n…there’s just something about you that....”

the confession leaves you speechless, your chest tightening as you try to process her words. she’s so close now that you can smell the faint scent of whiskey on her breath, mixed with something sweet that’s uniquely her.

“please, enough.” 

“i’ll stop,” she says quickly, holding her hands up in surrender. “i swear. i just—needed to get it out, you know? but i’ll stop now. sorry.” 

before you can respond, the diner door swings open behind you, and emma stumbles out, her arm slung around naomi’s shoulder as jules trails behind them, shoving a tube of lipstick in your bag. 

“ahh, there you are!” emma says, her voice loud and cheerful despite her disheveled state, “we thought you left us.”

you force a smile, grateful for the timely distraction, “just needed some air.”

emma’s eyes flick between you and billie, and her lips curve into a knowing smirk, “well, don’t let us interrupt! we’ll be on our way.” 

“emma.” you hiss, shooting her a glare, but she just laughs and waves you off, heading toward the car with naomi and jules in tow.

you turn back to billie, who’s watching you with an expression you can’t quite read, but you don’t have the energy to figure it out. you’re so tired and upset that you just walk away, leaving billie slumped against the brick walls of the diner’s exterior, hair wildly flowing in the wind as she watches you slip into your car, cranking the engine and pulling off and away. 

you really think you could cry right now. 

jules, naomi, and emma eventually fall asleep in the back, and you fight to stay awake the last five minutes of the drive as you start to drop everyone off at their dorm rooms, or at least near them. and then it’s you and a sleeping emma, her snores syncopated with the barking of the wind outside, and you quickly park and roll your windows up, taking off your seatbelt to turn around and poke your best friend. 

“wake up.” you whisper, prodding at her bare shoulder as she stirs awake, swatting your hand like a fly. she mumbles into the cushions of your seats, “mmmhmm, like— five more minutes.”

“we’re here, emma. we have to go inside, i’m tired.” you whined, rolling your eyes. although she’s annoyed, she sits up, wiping her eyes with the back of her palm. a sleepy grin is wiped across her face as she puts her hand out to touch yours, “i am…so sorry…for dragging you everywhere across town. you’re the best, y’know that?” 

you just nod in a silent thanks, squeezing her hand before opening the door and getting out, emma copying your movements. 

the two of you step out into the cold, the wind biting at your skin as you shiver and wrap your arms around yourself. emma stumbles a little, still half-asleep, and you reach out instinctively to steady her.

“you good?” you ask, glancing at her.

“yeah, yeah,” she mumbles, waving you off. “just…y’know, trying to remember how to walk.”

you huff out a laugh, your breath visible in the chilly night air. together, you trudge toward the dorm entrance, the sound of your footsteps echoing in the quiet.

emma fishes around in her purse for her key, muttering under her breath about how she’s going to “kill the next guy who offers her tequila.” you lean against the doorframe, watching her with tired amusement until she finally triumphs, holding up the key like a trophy.

“victory is mine!” she whispers dramatically, pushing the door open and gesturing for you to go in first.

inside, the warmth is immediate, and you let out a small sigh of relief, slipping off your shoes. emma kicks off her heels with an exaggerated groan, stumbling toward the couch. she collapses onto it, sprawling out like she’s never been more comfortable in her life.

“you coming?” she asks, peeking one eye open as you hover near the door.

“nah,” you say, shaking your head. “i’m gonna head to bed. i’m beat.”

emma gives you a thumbs up, already halfway to sleep again as you make your way toward your room.

but when you close the door behind you and sink onto your bed, exhaustion doesn’t come like you thought it would. your body aches for rest, but your mind is still spinning, replaying everything from the night.

you sit there for a while, staring at the wall, before finally pulling out your journal from the drawer beside your bed. the pages are filled with your handwriting, verses, prayers, and thoughts you’ve poured out over time. it’s a place where you’ve always felt safe, where you’ve always been honest.

you open to a blank page, hesitating for a moment before you start to write:

“God, tonight was…confusing. I don’t know how to feel about any of it. I want to do the right thing. I want to honor You. But sometimes, I feel like I’m stuck in this constant battle between who I am and who I think I’m supposed to be.

I feel so much pressure to have everything figured out, to make the right choices, to be good. But what if I don’t always know what that looks like? What if I mess up?

I don’t want to disappoint You. I don’t want to disappoint myself. But I’m scared, and I’m tired, and I just don’t know what to do.”

you pause, the pen hovering over the page, before finishing with a shaky, “Please, help me understand.”

closing the journal, you let out a long breath, the weight of your words still heavy on your chest.

you crawl under the covers, curling up on your side as the wind howls outside. the room is quiet, but your mind is so loud, filled with a mix of doubt and hope and a little bit of fear. 

and as you finally drift off to sleep, you pray for clarity, for strength, for peace. because even if you don’t have all the answers, you’re holding on to the belief that they’ll come. at some point.

send an ask to be added to my taglist !!

taglist: @vharperr | @47lake | @hopingforgoodblogs | @zendayasredbottoms | @chrissv4mp | @mseilishmwah | @justtr | @natbelovasblog | @lovelyy-moonlight | @bilsdillldough | @billiesrighthand | @sturnsmia | @karaeilishh | @asterisk-eyes | @billiesbabygirll | @hrts4billieeilish | @greenbttrflyy | @drunkinyourbenz | @amara-eilish | @profoundcoffeepeanut | @billsbaby | @hkkuugu | @bilssturns | @lovxlyvee | @stargirl-mayaa | @emilyshortcake | @lordfarquads-gurl3 | @wilsonkatya | @enchantingesme | @alexawhatstheweathertoday | @dyinbymistake | @stargirlbils | @ash198458

[wandasboy]

A Well-Deserved Break (part 2)

Older!Detective!Agnes x Younger!GN!Reader

DO NOT COPY OR PUBLISH MY WORKS. MINORS DNI. 18+ ONLY

Summary: It had been a week since your last encounter with Agnes, you couldn’t stop thinking about her no matter how hard you tried.

Tags: Age gap, gn!reader, no use of y/n, pet names, flirting, suggestive themes, sexual content

Word Count: 1200+

A/N: Sorry it took so long! Also, I have never written smut before so bear with me. There will likely only be one more part.

It is finals week, and you have one more exam to study for. You had been hunched over your desk for most of the evening once classes were over and were beginning to feel how stiff your back and neck were. You decided it was time for a break. It’s winter, but you decide a walk would be nice, just to stretch and get your blood pumping. You pulled on the first coat you saw and walked outside. 

About 10 minutes into your walk, you began to curse yourself for leaving the house without gloves or a hat, or even a thicker coat. Being stubborn, you shoved your hands in your pockets and kept going, not wanting to waste your break. As you are shuffling along the sidewalk, you hear a car pull up to a stop next to you.

“Well look who we have here, what are you doing walking around outside this late?” Detective Agnes smirks at you and waves you over. 

You smile and walk closer to the passenger door. “Hi Chief, I’ve been studying for hours and wanted some fresh air.” 

She watched as you rubbed your hands together,  chilled from the cold breeze. “Pretty cold for a walk don’t you think, sweetheart? C’mon, hop in and get warm.” 

Your face is red and wind-burnt and you can’t feel the tips of your fingers. She unlocks the door and you step in. “Thank you,” you mumble while shivering. 

“So smart and yet you’re out here without gloves and a hat?” She clicks her tongue in feign disapproval. She reaches into the back and grabs an extra jacket, throwing it over your lap. 

You pull it up over your arms and around your shoulders. In doing so, you catch a hint of her sandalwood and amber cologne lingering on the collar. You breathe it in, relaxing into the passenger seat. 

She watches you in her peripherals, smiling to herself. Within minutes of pulling away, she gets a text which makes her huff in frustration. 

“Damnit, stupid officers can’t do a single thing on their own.” She turns to look at you, “Sorry baby, I have to stop at the station and fix this. Do you want me to drop you off at your place?”

You can tell she’s peeved by the tone in her voice. Her grip on the wheel had tightened and she had turned back to face the road. 

You had missed her since the last time you saw her. Although you had only been with her for a few minutes, you found yourself longing to spend more time with her. “Can I come with you?” 

Agnes drew a short breath at your question, surprised. She quickly regained her composure, “I don’t see why not.”

~~~

Upon arriving at the station, Agnes opens the door for you, leading you to her office. She sits in her chair to take a call. You watch her from your spot near the door, unsure what to do. You try not to pay too much attention to the way her legs are spread, how her fingers grip the phone, and how every time she raises her voice it sends chills down your spine. 

Instead of standing there awkwardly, you take the opportunity to look around her office. Her chair is pulled away from her desk, so you walk in front of her to look at the items on her desk. She has case files, sticky notes, a framed picture, and a few trinkets scattered on her desk. You pick up a half-solved rubik’s cube and begin to fidget with it. 

Agnes looks up, watching you move in front of her, looking and touching the many items she has on her desk. She continues her conversation (although it is more her yelling at the person on the other end.)

Focused on the rubik’s cube, you barely notice her stand up, grabbing a file in front of you. You feel her breath on your neck and you shiver. Your heart begins to race as her front is almost flush to your back. Getting the file she needed, she sits back down in her chair. You let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. 

You turn to watch her, seeing how focused she is (albeit irritated), how she exudes authority and confidence. Gathering courage, you decide to sit on her desk, facing her, while you wait. She suddenly looks up, watching you. Her eyes rake over you and you shrink under her stare. She yells at the guy on the phone then hangs up with a sigh. You look down at her coyly as she sits back, enjoying her view. 

“Such a pretty doll you are.” She smirks, watching how you react to her words. Without thinking, you lick your lips and shift on her desk. She suddenly stands up directly in front of you, quickly taking advantage of the slight spread of your legs, stepping between them. She places both hands on the desk on either side of you, leaning into your space. You gasp, feeling her up against you. She chuckles at your reaction and moves her mouth closer to your neck, whispering. 

“You like this don’t you, sitting here, acting innocent. Such a tease.” She nips at your ear and you let out a small moan and instinctively shift your hips. The action causes your core to brush against her front. 

She takes this opportunity to grab your hips and pull you closer. You yelp at her rough grip, which encourages her to grind you against her. You reach up and put your hands on her shoulders to stabilize yourself. “Mm, such pretty sounds.” She presses her lips to your neck, ghosting her lips slowly downward. She licks at your pulse point and you wrap a hand around her neck. She bucks her hips and slides one hand under your shirt. Before she gets further, there is a knock at the door. She pulls away from you and sighs. Someone yells, “goodnight chief” through the door and walks away. 

Agnes looks at her watch and then back up to you. “It’s pretty late, we should get you home.” 

You look at her, visibly frustrated. “But-”

“Another time, baby. C’mon.” She gives you her hand to help you down from her desk. She grabs her coat and takes your hand, leading you out of the station. The drive to your place is silent, the tension evident in the air. You wonder how she knows where you live, but don’t question her. Upon arriving, she turns to look at you. 

“Goodnight, doll,” she says leaning over to kiss your cheek. 

You feel your cheeks turn a dark shade of pink. “Goodnight Detective,” you say with a small smile and get out, turning around to wave once you reach your door. 

Once you get inside, you lean against the door, letting out a deep breath. You close your eyes and try to stop your mind from racing. You decide to take a shower, hoping it will ease the butterflies in your stomach. After showering, you get in bed, knowing you’d be unable to focus on studying at this point. Lying in bed, your mind wanders, remembering the feeling of Agnes’ hands on you, her tongue tracing down your neck. You fall asleep, unable to ease the throb between your thighs.

~~~

Agnes drives back to her place, her mind replaying the events in her office. Upon getting home, she grabs a beer and sits on her couch, trying to distract herself from imagining having you all to herself, no interruptions… 

[lotus-n-l0ve]

LOST WITHOUT YOU, BABY

— Eren Yeager x Female Reader

With Heart And Soul.

*⁠.⁠✧ SYNOPSIS : Eren sometimes feared what he would do if you had not graced his life that one afternoon of mid-march. ・₊﹆ɞ‧₊

*⁠.⁠✧ WARNINGS & TAGS : Boyfriend!Eren, Girlfriend!reader, high school sweethearts, bullying, blood, fight, mob boss!eren, smut, kiss, late night, sex, p in v, 2.4k words. ・₊﹆ɞ‧₊

*⁠.⁠✧ NOTE FROM LOTUS : Feels so good to write after so long. My exams are coming up, of course I will wanna right now 乁⁠[⁠ ⁠◕⁠ ⁠ᴥ⁠ ⁠◕⁠ ⁠]⁠ㄏ

*⁠.⁠✧ — NAVIGATION // ATTACK ON TITAN MASTERLIST

DO NOT PRESS [READ MORE] IF YOU ARE NOT COMFORTABLE. MINORS DNI, IF YOU DO THEN IT'S YOUR OWN RESPONSIBILITY. ・₊﹆ɞ‧₊

𝐄𝐑𝐄𝐍 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐊𝐄𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐀𝐖𝐀𝐒𝐀𝐊𝐈 𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐉𝐀 𝐇2𝐑 at the back of the baby blue two story house. Crossing over the wall wasn't so hard anymore after doing so many times. He ghosted across the back yard and climbed on to the maple tree before he was standing in front of the familiar window that led to your bedroom, separating you from him.

Eren stepped ahead on the rough branch leading right to the window. The glass window was left open as if you knew he would come by. He slid it open and he jumped inside the room with a thud but not loud enough to alert your parents who were fast asleep two rooms down the hallway. You were fast asleep under the fluffy comfort of the duvet.

Eren tiptoed to the bathroom and opened the door with as little noise as possible. You had been whining about the ongoing exam and how much pressure it was giving you. Eren knew he could give you the world you wanted. You only had to tell him with your sweet voice and he would bring the whole world to your feet. But he also respected your decision to do something yourself, to be independent.

Getting rid of any and every piece of clothing, Eren stepped under the shower head. Warm water glided down his body, soothing away all the tension in his muscles. Eren tangled a hand through the wet locks and tilted his head back. Drops of water pitter-pattering on his eyes and lips. His heart was felt with nothing but detest and abhor. He loathed everything, from the waking moment to the last awake second everyday.

Eren sometimes feared what he would do if you had not graced his life that one afternoon of mid-march.

The intense hit of boot against your belly sent a jolt of acute pain through your body. It would leave a ugly bruise you were sure. The blood had already dried under your nose long ago, now the area just  felt tight and itchy. The next hit came down hard on your head, almost knocking you out.

         “Do you have some screws loose in your head?” Your attacker shouted, stomping on your crouched body that stayed laying down on the cold floor of an empty classroom, “I clearly told you to finish my assignment and hand it over to teach. Then why the fuck is he saying I didnt submit my work?”

Two of his minions didn't try even the slightest to suppress the snickers. Standing behind their leader as if he was doing something great.

         “It was your assignment. Why should I do it?” Each trembling word that came out of your mouth, hurt your throat like hell. But it was not worse than the torture you had been enduring for the past two months. Precisely two and half months ago, you moved to this new city because of your father’s transfer. It had been two months since you started attending ‘Heritage High’ and every single student here had made it their job to bully the life out of the new student. Louise Liebert being the leader of them all.

He was the kid who was never told ‘no’ in his entire life. So, when you, being the reserved kid you were, denied to exchange your new fountain pen with his already half used ball pen, it hurt his ego and he made it his mission to fill your days in the school with hurt and sorrow. The pain was special to you, your grandpa had gifted it to you for the new journey you were going to start. He always had it with him wherever he went. He called it his lucky star but it didn't seem to have much luck for your case.

Complaining to your parents got you nowhere when the school staff and children pledged for his innocence. You had a suspicion that it had something to do with his father being the mayor of the town. The only thing you accomplished was proving yourself to be a liar to your parents and increased bullying.

         “Looks like you still have the energy to argue, huh?” Adler, the tall and abnormally skinny guy on his right scoffed.

         “All that beating was not enough for you was it?” Baldur, the shorty onLouise’s left sneered down at you.

         Louise brought his face to your level, a vicious smirk on his face, “Do you need a dick in your mouth to shut up like your mommy dearest?”

You didn't know what happened but the second those words left his stinky mouth, you shot up. Your head hitting his jaw as he went back flying, slamming his head on the hard floor. The room echoed the crazy screams of three individuals. A sense of fight or flight knocked you and you were sprinting out of the room, running through the empty hallway with three angry bulls running after you. As much as scared you were, you were also very proud of yourself. You hoped he cracked his head.

You ran and ran fast. If they got their hands on you then you were sure that you would be going home with more than just black eyes. Running up the stairs, you threw the door in front of you with a screech. They were just a few steps away from you as you pushed the door with your whole body and tried to shut the door. But your tired body was too weak against three of them.

The door swung with force, tripping you backwards on the ground. Fuck! They towered over your body, looking like hungry hyenas, very injured hyenas at that.If only you were not about to get beaten, you would have danced with joy. They closed in on you as you attempted to back away.

         “Now what? Where are you gonna run now bitch!” Louise sneered. 

         “Why don't you worry about yourself first, Liebert…….” You see the colours drain from Louise’s face, not only him but also his minions. “......Quite the brevery you’ve got there.”

The more that deep voice spoke a little far behind you, the more shit scared those fuckers looked. Your head turned ever so slowly. The very familiar body of Eren Yeager lying on the hard bench. Suddenly jumping off the roof didn't seem that bad. If Louise was a hyena, then Eren was the lion. Eren was the nightmare of Marley. Notorious, cruel, and brutal were the words that describe him. The only son of Grisha Yeager, the successor of Lupus, the biggest underworld gang. They didn't have to hide in the shadows, no, they wore suits and flaunted themselves in the broad daylight. The government was run by the rats of Lupus.

Eren lived up to his name, Hel, beautiful on one side and cruel on the other. He had everyone in Heritage High walking on eggshells.In attempt of saving yourself from one trouble, you threw yourself in the tiger’s den.

         “E-Eren–” Louise squicked rather embarrassingly, “We–”

         “Since when are we on a first name basis?” His tone was nonchalant but even you could feel the threat underneath.

Eren leisurely brought himself up in a sitting position. His eyes looked this side on the floor and then that side, searching for something, before it landed on you. You could feel your heart in your throat. God! You didnt wanna be anywhere near that menace of a boy. He jerked his head to your right, pointing at something.

What is it? A bat like his last victim? Or a gun like the one before that?

You follow his gaze, landing on a black bag and an unopened can of soda. You prayed to all the gods in existence that he meant the soda can as you hurriedly scooted over to bring it to him. He glanced at your hands holding out the can for him before staring at you with a raised eyebrow. WHAT NOW? 

You glanced at the can before realization drew onto you. Dumbass! You used all the strength you had and opened it and offered him again. This time Eren took the can, taking a sip of the cold drink.

         “Sir Yeager, everything is this bitch’s fault.” Alder spoke up, “Had she not run in here, we would have never disturbed you.”

         “Yes sir, we were teaching her a lesson but this bitch–” Baldur backed him.

         Eren took another sip, “Lesson? What is this great lesson of yours?” 

         The three exchanged worried glances and finally the biggest asshole of the group spoke up, “We were doing this for you sir.” 

         “Yes we caught her bad mouthing you–” 

         “That's not true!!” You almost yelled in fear, “I–”

Eren held up a hand, shutting you up and signed for them to continue. You could see relief sinking on them. Their eyes glinted with smugness.

        Louise continued with all the arrogance in his voice, “She was talking shit about you and we told her that she should not do that, she said that “Eren can suck my dick” that you are a lousy fucker who uses his father to get away with everything.”

         “Is that so?”

You felt your heart sink. Eyes prickled with tears and nose burned like hell as you grasped what was going to happen. The best would be if he straight up strangled you to death. Your head bowed down in the last attempt of saving yourself from further embarrassment. But did that even matter anymore?

You saw Eren throwing the can to the side, out of sight, and stood up and you instinctively backed away two steps. You waited for the blow to come, you waited and waited and waited because the blow never came. But a loud thud along with a piercing scream echoed on the rooftop, scaring away the pigeons there alongside you. Your bread shot up and the scene before you left you gasping.

Dulder’s body stayed slumped against the wooden door with his head shoved into the, now broken, door. Blood pooled around his quivering form and splattered on walls, his friends and most of all, on Eren himself. 

         Eren grabbed Louise’s coller and brought him up to his eye lever, “You think i'm one of your minions or something that i'll believe whatever you say?”

         Eren had a good five inches on Louise. His toes were barely touching the floor and that left him gasping for air, “I’m t-telling…… the…t-truth–”

         “So you are saying that you think–no, believe that I should suck your dick? That I get away with everything because of my father?” Eren tilted his head to the side and scoffed, “Do you also think that my father can stop me from beating you to death? Let’s do a little test.”

The next few minutes were like hell. You could hear every sound of bone cracking whenever Eren landed a punch. Every splash of blood and the groans of pain. You had slouched yourself in a crouched position, facing the wall, in the last attempt of saving yourself. When it finally stopped, you found yourself unable to relax because he was still there. The next could be you.

Sniffles were uncontrollable, you were probably shaking like you were being electrocuted. You heard steps closing on you before stopping right behind you.

         “Oii…” You felt a light kick on the back of your leg, “Are you seriously crying? After I beat your bullies?”

You tried to at least say one word but your throat was clogged with sniffles. He sighed as if you were a lost cause. 

         “So ungrateful. Not even a thanks.” Something fell on your head, a blazer, hiding you from the outside world, “You stink man! Go take a shower.”

With that he left you, alone, on the rooftop, with thousands of thoughts and maybe a little bit of relief. For Eren those were the best minutes he wasted and that he will never regret.

          “What are you thinking about?” You asked with your ever so soft voice as you ran your hands through his long hair from the back.

          “You.” Eren replied without a hint of hesitation.

You dragged your fingers down his neck and started massaging his tensed shoulder and his back.

         “Another meeting with your dad?” you received a hum in response, “Then you must be tired?”

         “Mm-hmm.”

         “Frustrated?”

         “Mmm.”

         “Should I do something…….to take off the load?”

You could feel the smirk on his face without even seeing it, “You know just the thing to relieve me, don't you?”

Eren didn't give you a second to reply as he turned to you, grabbing your neck, and pulled you in an intense kiss. You were just as eager to meet his passion, shoving your tongue his mouth and exploring each and every corner. He pushed you against the glass door of the shower. His hand glided down your chest, brushing on your peaked nipples and down your hip.

         Giving a tap on your thigh, he whispered against your lips, “Jump.”

Your hands find themselves tangled in his soaked hair and he uses his arm to support you in the air. Eren broke the kiss, out of breath, smoke coming out of your mouth and mixing in the middle. You feel his tip poking your wet pussy. Eren glids his tip along your lips, teasing you. 

         “Just put it in.” You whined in a breathless tone.

Oh! How adorable you look, begging for his cock.

         “As you wish, baby.”

He forced his cock in one go, making you moan  as the back of your head hit the glass. His hips slammed against your inner tight in a burning rhythm. Eren placed kisses along your neck that you were sure ws gonna leave dark purple bruises before he took one of the hard buds in his mouth. Sucking and twirling it his tongue.

He dragged his dick out till it was just the tip inside and then thrusted it all back inside. Your clammy walls stretched with every push. You could feel it, the familiar knot in your stomach. Eren increased his pace, closing in. Your hand tightly fisted his hair as you let yourself fall apart in his warm embrace. Not seconds later he shot stings of hot cum in you, filling up your inside. Still inside’ he pulled in a kiss but this time it was soft, delicate and full of tender love. ・₊﹆ɞ‧₊

LIKED IT? THEN PLEASE LEAVE A LIKE, REBLOG & COMMENT. IT WOULD MEAN A LOT AND FOLLOW ME FOR MORE LIKE THESE. THANK YOU ♡

© 𝐋𝐎𝐓𝐔𝐒-𝐍-𝐋𝟎𝐕𝐄 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟓, 𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓𝐒 𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐕𝐄𝐃 — all content rights belongs to LOTUS-N-L0VE. do not plagiarise any works and do not repost or translate onto any other sites.・₊﹆ɞ‧₊

[reilemon]

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ 2024 fics in review ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡

♡ thank you @rose-tinted-kalopsia for tagging me - you can view her post here ♡ i'm tagging @acciotaitlynn @nanamiscocksleeve @hesperisms @poisonf0rest + any writer who wants to join. and no pressure ofc 💕

Total number of fics: 16 Total word count: just under 82k

Chronological Breakdown:

April - ❄Cool Off * ✩Under The Stars May - ଳLove Don't Be Shy * ✩Xavier, Xavier, Xavier * ଳIridescent Scales June - ✩Passion Star Martini July - ✩My Everything August - ♪Ambrosia October - ❄Tight Spot * ଳBeneath The Abyss * ✩Velvet Night * ♪Possession * ❄Beneath The Collar * ❄ଳAmore Immortale♪✩ December - ♪Surrender❄ * ♪Return To You

Overall Thoughts:

Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d predicted?

I didn't expect to write at all! I wrote some fics back in 2020 and 2021. After deleting them, I thought my writing days were over. But, Love and Deepspace resuscitated my love for writing.

What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted in January? 

Obviously, didn't expect to get attached to Love and Deepspace so much!

What’s your own favorite story of the year?

Beneath The Collar 

Did you take any writing risks this year?

Writing Amore Immortale has my braincells working overtime, since it's supposed to be a slow burn that leads to polyamory.

Do you have any fanfic or profic goals for the new year? 

To finish, or at least to be close to finishing Amore Immortale.

From my past year of writing, what was…

My best story of this year:

Beneath The Collar

My most popular story of this year: 

Cool Off (2.8k notes) - i still don't understand why 😅 it's my very first fic for this fandom, and also the first fic after not writing smut for like three years. Ofc I'm grateful that people like it, but I cringe every time I remember the setting lol.

Story of mine most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion:

Beneath The Collar. Honestly, I expected it to be the most popular or at least second most popular during Kinktober. But the people who did like it were very invested in the story, so that makes me happy. And @gattapotatta made this beautiful artwork inspired by it.

Most fun story to write:

Amore Immortale. That one is the balm for my soul.

Story with the single sexiest moment:

I have no idea omfg

Most “holy crap, that’s wrong, even for you” story:

I think that everything I wrote was pretty tame. But I guess personal sacrilege in Beneath The Collar can be considered wrong lol. And some people were apparently taken aback by the dvp moment in Surrender.

Story that shifted my own perceptions of the characters:

None.

Hardest story to write:

Possession. I'm currently working on the sequel, and it continues to be the bane of my existence.

Biggest disappointment:

Xavier, Xavier, Xavier. For me, it's so bland, I almost didn't post it. Also, Tight Spot - Zayne is a little ooc there.

Biggest surprise:

Not to copy Roxie, but I'm so surprised by the love everyone has shown my fics! Without your support I'd probably just stop writing again.

Most unintentionally telling story:

There's the reoccurring theme in my fics where the Reader has run away to start a new life. 🤨

Highlights + Wrap-up:

I don't have that many fics to have 5 favorite opening, and closing lines. Or 5 favorite lines from anywhere. So I'll just write some randomly -

"Poor little bunny." - opening line in Amore Immortale, ch. 1.

He’s just a man now—just Zayne. - line from Beneath The Collar

Fic-writing goals for 2025: 

Write more fluffy smut and more unhinged smut.

[sarangwonie]

★彡 I CAN’T QUIT YOU | YANG JUNGWON

pairing: yang jungwon x female reader

genre: idol!jungwon, idol!reader, cold!jungwon, soft!reader, angst, tiniest bit of fluff, comfort

notes: this is my first time postin in tumblr >< so the aesthetics might be messy but enjoy!

It was no secret that one of the hardest things you'll ever have to endure as an idol's significant other is a world tour. If the sheer distance doesn't kill your relationship then the differing time zones definitely will. However you were optimistic. Being an idol yourself? You were well aware of the romantic setbacks of your profession.

And besides… this was Yang Jungwon we were talking about. The same doe-eyed boy that used to leave chocolates in your locker when you were still trainees. The same doe-eyed boy that asked around for your number just to ask you out. The same doe-eyed boy you loved and loved you back.

Yang Jungwon would never do anything to intentionally hurt you. Or so you hoped.

So, like the optimist you claimed to be, there you stood in front of your boyfriend's dorm a day afer their arrival in Seoul and a week after the conclusion of their ten month long tour. You take a deep breath before breaking into a practiced smile.

It'll be fine. You say to yourself— trying to build enough courage to ring the doorbell. Eventually, in another minute or five— you do.

“(Y/N)!” Suhwan was the first to greet you— having swung the door open for you. With an excited smile gracing his features he instantly pulls you into a friendly embrace. “How long has it been? We've missed you!” Suhwan has been the boy's manager since debut. You've always seen him as older brother though— having formed a bond over the years.

“Too long…” You grumble with pouted lips. Though something was already eating at your insides. “And it's their first day back! Of course I'd surprise them.” It twisted and turned.

Suhwan raises an eyebrow suspiciously, “Really? You sure you're not here to visit that little boyfriend of yours?” He accuses teasingly. Oh so he doesn't know? Doesn't know about your otherwise radio silent relationship with his group's leader.

That's a good thing… right?

Eversince Jungwon had gone on tour he's been different. It started with responding to texts late to which— you gave the benefit of the doubt to because of course? You were in a constant two to twelve hour time difference. It couldn't be helped right? But then— he started ignoring your nightly tradition of facetiming.

Which again? You attempted to chalk up to stress or fatigue. Though that never quiet sat right with you. What really did it for you though was when he wouldn't even talk to you. No more good morning or night texts. No more random selfies or videos. No more updates.

You'd go days sometimes even weeks without a single conversation. And even on his day offs? He'd refuse to take you out or to even see you. Reasoning his exhaustion or previously set family plans.

And though you hid it pretty well— exhausting yourself with your own work— it was really starting to break you. You were starting to grow numb from all the overthinking, crying, and sleepless nights. Feeling as if your heart was being ripped apart every single time he'd reply coldly or blatantly disregard your needs.

You won't quit though. If he couldn't be there for the both of you… couldn't love enough for the two of you. You would. And that goes both ways. That was the promise you made as trainee. Albeit a little naive but at the time? You both meant it.

He still loves me. Despite the uncertainty around your relationship. This much you were sure of. He promised. He promised you he'd love you. No matter what. No matter the circumstances.

“I got snacks for everyone!” She misdirects the conversation. Being unable to answer Suhwan's question directly, hoping her crescent like eyes were enough to distract him. Thankfully, they were.

Suhwan nods in acknowledgement “Go give it to them then! They'll love to see you.” You sure hope so, “They're in the living room.” He informs— so without another second of delay, you nervously made your way to the living room where they all seemed to be.

You were just about to make your presence known when suddenly, you hear Jay speaking, starting a seemingly timely conversation. “So? Are you going to talk about it now? Talk about why you've been ignoring your girlfriend?” Guess you weren't safe after all. Of course the boys would know. “I can't keep updating her for the two of you Won. She's trying so hard to reconnect with you. What is it with you that you just won't let her?”

Okay, you were guilty of that. Sometimes, you'd text Jay to ask about Jungwon when he wouldn't reply. It was only harmless things like— has he been eating right? Or sleeping well. You didn't think he'd notice from that alone. You underestimated his foresight with these kinds of things.

There was a long pause before you finally heard your boyfriend's voice. It's been so long that it almost felt unnatural. It was hard to believe that— that same voice used to comfort you so much. “She's just…” You heard contemplation in his tone. As if he just couldn't admit to it. “I didn't know that being on tour would be this hard.”

In some sick and twisted way that you were most definitely going to chalk it up to love, hearing him say that made you feel bad. Almost enough to forgive him for all the torment he's put you through.

“While we were on tour I had to be a leader and an artist twenty-four seven— every single day— for months. And it really… overwhelmed me.” You hear him mumble in response. As if piecing together his thoughts. “And eventually, even being a boyfriend became too much for me. She became too much for me.”

“She’s was always asking me to text her more, asking for updates, asking to call, and asking to spend my day offs with her. She started to feel like an obligation and I just… couldn't bring myself to want… to do those things for her. I was already thinking of so much.”

You slowly feel your resolve crumbling. You were barely holding it in.

“I know it doesn't seem like it but I'm trying…” He continues, “I've been forcing myself to text her back and give her a call but I just couldn't do it? It didn't feel genuine. It felt like I was just doing it for the sake of it. I was already being an asshole. The least I could do was be honest.”

“And you've felt like that for months? You've been leading her on like this for months?” Jay asks almost in disbelief. “Do you even love her anymore Won?”

You take a step back at that point. You refused to hear it. He could say all that he's said over and over again and you'd take it. But hearing him say that he didn't love you anymore? That was a finality you weren't ready for. Not right now. “(Y/N)?” Suhwan whispers to you— taking you out of your trance. His eyes full of worry, having heard the conversation himself.

“I’ll go…” You mumble softly, still a small smile on your teary-eyed face, handing him the snacks you spent all night preparing. “Don't tell them okay?” You say, almost breaking Suhwan's heart at the sight.

He watched as you ran out the door— unsure if you'll ever come back.

You couldn't quit him. You knew you'd regret it. But what good was this relationship going to do for you— if he had already quit you.

[invinciblerodent]

............. my notes app has a subscription now

I could, were I the sort of person, buy a lifetime subscription to my offline note-taking app, the one I use to write shopping lists and to blearily write nonsense when I can't sleep at 4 am

maybe we're primed for eradication as a species

[themarsbar]

.

[llitchilitchi]

people always complain about a story not making sense because they refuse to read the notes and stuff found around in the world and call it bad game design, but when a story has a lot of exposition in dialogue its bad writing because its exposition dump, and when the notes and dialogue are made to be minimal so people can only learn the lore they feel like learning the story is "badly delivered" because it was not spoon-fed to us? just say you hate spending time learning the lore and go