#even my high kids suffer when i sacrifice their small group time for one of the low groups

[applesandbannas747]

me: so-and-so is an amazing and bright individual and I know they're ready for middle school! To set them up for success, I'd highly recommend looking into tutoring. I know *school most of them are going to* has a homework club, which would be an awesome place to start! They master concepts quickly and easily in small groups environments with more immediate access to the teacher--

me:

me: waiT A SECOND the reason all these kids need tutoring is because class sizes are too large for the general teacher to effectively reach each student during whole class instruction

the way 70% of my issues would be solved by having 15 kids instead of 30 is insane

teaching has revealed so many lies to me but by god is it true that when your teacher pesters and pushes you, it means they care. When they start to leave you tf alone it means they've stopped caring, and that's probably when you should be worrying about where you're headed.

anyway, report cards are due tonight, and all of the students I love are getting comments suggesting tutoring and homework clubs in middle school <3

[aleatoryalarmalligator]

As you all may know, my mother is on a ventilator for covid 19. She didn’t believe in covid. I tried to tell her but she didn’t believe it. She tried to tell me some kind of Qanon bologne when I’d try to tell her. I would give anything to have more time with my mother. There is some signs of improvement in her feeling better but I am not wanting to become too hopeful. She was on the phone with one of my elder sisters for six minutes rather than two the other day. She was angry at her for letting her kids come in to her house knowing they had covid.

I’m very angry at her doctor who told her she didn’t need the covid shot, in fact just telling her she is healthy. She has a small body frame and is on the shorter side but weighs nearly three hundred pounds and struggles to get around. She’s 59 years old and works as a nurse at a nursing home and works way too hard on minimum wage, has given birth to six children, has always had asthma and is prone to bronchitis and pneumonia. She’s a prime candidate for covid, in fact she is who I thought about the day I remember reading about covid. It’s like this disease was designed to kill my mother.

They sent her to southern Idaho for a ventilator. She is lucky to get one. They’ve run out in many of these red states that didn’t take covid seriously enough. It does not bring me any joy that right wingers and people who didn’t believe in the shot are dying. I’ve had liberal friends say over simplistic things about people from red states getting what’s coming to them and so forth, and people have rejoiced at the idea of trump supporters getting sick and suffering and dying.

I am left leaning, but I never want to get so caught up in my political ego that I eradicate any notion of humanity to the people I don’t agree with or might not even like. Their pain and lives are real and legitimate as anyone else’s. Their families matter too. They are wrong, my mother is wrong. She’s been backwards about a lot of the world my whole life.

But she’s also a very kind person. She is always giving to people and has contradictory, while supporting a fucking horrible president, also put up for and fought her job because of racism she was seeing all around her. She doesn’t really think like a conservative and her way of approaching life didn’t really ever reflect a deeper conservative value or drive. I’ve noticed other conservatives never liked her.

She believed the wrong things because she was driven by religious faith and loneliness to believe the rabbit hole of alt right Facebook. She doesn’t have much of an education, was bullied and abused for most of her childhood. she went to over twenty different schools and moved a lot throughout her childhood. She got married and started having children very young. She always worked as a bartender, or as a caretaker to children with disabilities or elderly folk. She barely understood the internet. She believed in god and joined religious groups on Facebook very open and blindly without even understanding propaganda or the political climate of what is being fought for, which pretty much took her down this poisonous road. And now she’s barely able to talk in an icu all alone, as this virus that she didn’t believe in tries to kill her.

Moving to the city and always being left leaning, but being from a rural area of the inland north west, where I was outnumbered and lived amongst these folk who didn’t like me all that much but I was always having to find ways to accept and understand sometimes gives me a perspective perhaps that maybe liberal kids from middle class families from liberal cities have missed out on. I will never be able to see it as black and white. It would be easy to just say that the people in Bible Belt areas deserve this and be rid of any sadness or guilt. I was disgusted by the anti intellectualism I was surrounded by and I lived for most of my twenties in my own world to avoid it when I was growing up and lived in my home state which is fairly red. But people are the same everywhere. They really are.

Her recovery is slow and I worry something terrible is happening to her organs and lungs as she has fights for her life. I hope her body is strong enough to keep fighting. I appreciate the care and labor and sacrifice the hospitals have given to keep people alive. There is so much anguish. We have lost a mural of so many wonderful and beautiful souls to covid. It’s hard to even fathom the grief and pain it’s left in its wake. I can barely cope with my own.

I took a walk today to think. I haven’t wanted to listen to music in a long while because my mood is on my mother’s condition, but I put in John Prine. He was one of the first people to die of covid that I cared about, albeit indirectly as I only know him through his songs. I had a ticket to go see him play before covid took his life. It was going to be small and intimate outdoor concert in town. His music was always so real and down to earth. He sings about the quiet sad things of getting old and the way that love is about the daily existence with other people. How you build and cope with things.

One of his last songs on the album before he died was about how science has no business tinkering with nature. It’s so genuine. And ironic. Not everyone shares this belief, but I think that the covid flu was made in a lab and someone made a mistake and let it out into the public. I believe it was just human error in Wuhan. Nobody, no government or anything wanted this. And the Chinese government did everything they could to avoid fessing up to the mistake. So the idea of a lab grown virus being what killed John Prine kind of hurts in a way, though he also often sang about being comfortable with death and having peace with a life that was happy.

There are countless people I could blame for my mother’s disease. I could blame the dystopian Chinese government and their inability to admit fault, I could blame our government and our long-standing capitalist system that monetary prioritizes gain over human life, I could blame my mother’s cruel upbringing for not giving her the tools she needed to make wise choices about the world around her, or she herself for not taking care of her body. I could blame her mother and father and brothers.

I could blame my sisters kids for their lack of consideration of what covid would do to my mother’s health knowing she was high risk, or my eldest sister herself for being lazy and letting them go to my moms house knowingly.

I could blame some mentally unwell woman named Susan who my mother might have vaguely known for inviting her to a Facebook group of hate and conspiracy, or blame the nuns who drove religion into my mother’s head as a child. I could blame the easy to punch Ted Cruz or Tucker Carleson or any of the right wing mouth pieces for spreading lies and misinformation to the people they are supposedly speaking up for on behalf of about covid. I could blame it on our artificially based two party system that prevents real discussion from ever happening.

In the end, there is a myriad of things I could blame. So many pieces to the puzzle I could write volumes. But it doesn’t change where we are at now. And I have little control of the world around me. Or what made it that way. It’s disappointing. And in a way, John Prine has that message too. I’m just sad. I try to remember that my mom of the many people I have known was very accepting of death. Maybe it’s because she’s a person of faith, but she has a practical dark humor about her too that makes her accept it. I know she wouldn’t want me to be sad, but I am all the same.

It’s happened at this point where I am genuinely feeling my age and kind of at a crossroads in who I am as a person and what I want to do. I’ll talk about that some other time though. There is only so much a person can read.

[ginger-bread-official]

She Was There for a Reason

A fanfic of the battle of Hogwarts from Tonks’ perspective.

-

She was dodging curses, jinxes and falling stone while navigating the castle. It was pure choas; students, teachers Order members all fighting against the death eaters, giants, and... was that a acromantula? Tonks fended off a pair of death eaters form some students who clearly didn’t have much dueling experience.

“Thanks.” one of them panted when she stunned and bound their attackers. she nodded and asked,

“What in Merlin’s name are you kids doing here?” they all ducked at the sound of a near by explosion. “You all need to get out of here now!” She scolded them and cringed at how quickly she’d adopted a motherly tone.

“No we’re of age and McGonagall told us we could fight.” She sighed, not in the frame of mind to argue.

“Fine, but stick together and find some high ground.” A jet of purple light collided with the stone wall behind them, sending shards of stone flying all over. She shielded the three teens out of instinct, and fired at the closest death eater who was dueling Kingsley Shackelbolt.

“Thank you!” the only girl of the three said.

“Get going!” she yelled over her shoulder throwing another jinx to assist her fellow auror. They turned to do as she instructed, but she remembered the reason she came. “Wait.” They looked back to her, “Have you seen Remus Lupin?” she asked desperately. 

“Professor Lupin?” The tall boy asked.

“Yes.” another jet of light narrowly missed the group.

“He was leading a group onto the grounds, but got caught up fighting Dolohov near the courtyard.” he responded. The ground shook and she ushered them away with thanks to Dean for the information.

Kingsley was loosing ground against Yaxley near by as the students headed for better position. Tonks hurtled over the rubble she was taking cover under to aid him. 

“Tonks!?” was all he could yell out in the heat of battle.

“Need help old man?” she hollered back shooting a barrage of jinxes at Yaxley. The death eater stuttered backwards for a moment giving Kingsley the time to right himself. The pair danced in the duel as their mentor had taught them. For a man who trusted no one Mad eye sure knew how to build a perfect team. Crabbe and Goyle appeared to help Yaxley against the duo. Kingsley in these settings tended to take on the role of defense while Tonks charged forward on attack, but in the face of three death eaters he stepped in front of the new mother; the woman he loved like a sister, and wildly blitzed the men. Tonks held the defense, shielding any jinxes and watched as her friend dealt a decisive blow, and cut down all three death eaters. 

“What the Hell are you doing here?” He yelled turning to her.

“Saving your sorry arse!” She responded defiantly

“I was doing fine, and what about Teddy?!”

“He’s with me mum.” A great rumble shook the castle causing them to grab each other for stability.

“You’re in danger.” He looked wildly around for cover, “We need to get you out of here. Why did you come?” He asked franticly. 

“I came for the same reason I joined the order, the same reason I became an auror.” She looked up at him, “I have to help, I need to help.” He understood. They all had the calling in them, you can’t ignore the the cries of those in need. 

“Fine.” he sighed. “But keep on high ground.” She rolled her eyes. He was treating her like she was a trainee again.

“Have you seen Remus?”

“He was down in the courtyard last I saw.” They began to run in that direction, “Took Dolohov off my hands leaving me just with Yaxley.” The pair split up at the great staircase, Tonks promising to look for Lupin from above and stay out of harms way. She was helping some students on the upper levels overlooking the courtyard, fending off any enemies that approached, while looking for her husband. It was all a haze and everything was exploding all around them. She was holding strong against some incoming dementors, and had a few students helping her when she saw something that twisted her insides painfully.

Bellatrix Lestrange was playing with her food.

Her aunt, the one that resembled he kind loving mother, was torturing Neville Longbottom at the base of the great staircase. His screams curdled her blood and pierced her heart. She was taunting him. 

“Ickle Longbottom screams just like his mommy did.” She was sick, demented. Tonks remembered the vile threats she made on Teddy’s life. That woman had caused enough pain. Her wolf patronus pushed back the last of the Dementors and rushed off towards Bellatrix with Tonks close behind. She thought of Teddy holding his beautiful face in her minds eye as she charged her aunt. Neville was Alice’s Teddy. “As fun as this is. Bloodtraitor, I’ll have to cut it short.” Neville was panting from the most recent bout of torture, sweat drenching his clothes and shimmering on his young face. The tip of her wand began to glow green, “Avad-”

“Bellatrix!” Tonks screamed. The older woman paused and turned to see her niece standing at the top of the staircase.

“You.” Her attention was completely on Tonks now, hatred and fury now emanating from the oldest Black sister.

“Neville,” Tonks looked to the young man, “Go help your friends I’ll handle her.” Neville began to protest, “Run! Now!” She shouted as she shot a jinx at her aunt. Bellatrix easily dodged it, but at least her attention was off of the boy now. Neville hurried to the aid of Ginny who was fighting Greyback nearby. The death eater and the auror trades a few curses with Tonks keeping the high ground and landing a some good hits on the older woman. Her aunt’s actions were wild and desperate. 

“After I kill you, I’m going to kill your mutt of a husband and then your precious pup.” She spat out before sending another few killing curses at Nymphadora. 

“If you keep talking like that Remus and I are going to take you off the Christmas card list.” she smirked taunting the woman. A few more curses wizzed passed her as the pair took their duel to the second level of the castle. Tonks was losing ground, but to be fair even the great Minerva McGonagall struggled against Bellatrix.

It was heated to say the least. Tonks felt satisfaction for her small hits and limited victories, but then immediately felt exhaustion from dodging, and shielding from the countless attacks. She had to win she needed to protect Teddy Bellatrix was the looming cloud over everything they did. They hid their marriage because of her, hid the pregnancy because of her. It needed to end. Tonks became more frantic, attacking with the smallest openings, resorting to dark curses and risky maneuvers. She was turning the tide, she could feel it she could land one last hit.... But she was too slow. Bellatrix blasted her back in one of her exposed blitz. She hit the wall hard knocking the wind from her and dropping her crumpled on the ground. Her aunt’s laugh was manic as she charged forward sending stunning, cutting and bruising jinxes at Tonks. She fended off one barely, but was hit by the others. She rushed in close to her niece, grabbing her spiked pink hair with one hand and pressing her wand into her throat with the other.

“I wish I had more time to enjoy this.” She hissed into Nymphadora’s bloodied and bruised face. “Like when I killed your mudblood father.” a pain ripped through Nymphadora. “I took time with his punishment. Days and days I spent breaking him.” She licked her lips at the memory. “But I suppose I’ll have that again with your husband and baby.” Tonks felt the hatred build in her to a breaking point. Her sweet father had died at the hands of this monster. Remus would suffer, Teddy..... no. She thought of everything Bellatrix had done. All the nights her mother spend crying over her sister. Neville’s parents, her father, every vile and heinous thing that boiled Tonks’ blood, and with the last of her strength she raised her wand and blurted out.

“Avada Kedavra.” A green jet shot out and sent Bellatrix flying backwards to the opposing wall. A mixture of horror and relief washed through her at what she just did. Her hatred and fear had taken control she was desperate to do anything to save her family. Her feelings hadn’t settled when the heap that was her aunt moved. She got to her feet with difficulty as her aunt rose seemingly from the dead. The Death Eater’s face was bloodied and her motions seemed pained, but yet she lived.

“That was a good first try.” She turned fully to Tonks with clear pain in her face. “But it’s more than just hate dear.” Tonks raised her wand while still leaning on the wall for support, “Its the joy of killing. Let me show you.” Tonks felt a single tear run down her face. Not for her, but for Teddy. it was his face she held in her mind as she heard her aunt give her demonstration.

-

I hate when people shit on Tonks for going to the battle. She is a good soul who couldn’t stand by when people needed her. I wanted to give a concrete reason why she needed to be there, why her sacrifice meant so much more than her leaving Teddy orphaned. She was a hero and people shit on her because of it. this is the only time you see me admit she died. But I believe she had to be there to save Neville. She would have been the only person short Harry that could have diverted Bellatrix’s attention. She sacrificed herself and Neville was able to aid Harry and the rest is history.

Also as badass as Molly Weasley is, the first time we see her Duel is against Bellatrix, and I think it would make more sense if Bellatrix was weakened when she died at Molly’s hand.

[eleanor-devil]

Boruto: Sacrifices [Remade] | Chap.13 - What Matters Most

Written by: Eleanor-Devil & @mirage-05​​

Prologue | Chap.1 | Chap.2 | Chap.3 | Chap.4 | Chap.5 | Chap.6 | Chap.7 | Chap.8 | Chap.9 | Chap. 10 | Chap.11 | Chap.12 | Chap.13 - You’re here

The chill of the earliest hours of the day were gaining upon them as the large group made its way through the woods, as discreetly as possible. But no chill could've rivaled the one that was growing in Sasame's heart at that moment. She couldn't help the way in which her thoughts kept drifting to her husband. It had been twenty years since she had known Hideyoshi, they had met briefly before she left for her mission to find her cousin. He had always been honest, caring... Especially for those younger than him. And he had always been a man of honor... That was the trademark of the Oberatsu after all, their penchant for honor... Why would he attack a child? Was it possible... that she didn't get to know him at all...? "Mama?" The voice of her eldest, Kazuhiro, was enough to snap her out of it. The young boy was looking at her through worried dark brown irises. Sasame's sad eyes took a softer look. "Kazuhiro..." (1) "Are we... going to see my dad again...?" That was the question she had feared. The orange haired kunoichi closed her eyes for a moment as memories flooded her mind...

[Flashback] "I am begging you, you mustn't go!" The woman's eyes showed nothing but desperation as she watched her husband packing his weapons. The arrows, his small bow... And the truth that she could do nothing to stop him made her heart ache, so much so that it was almost unbearable... "This is a great honor. You should understand..." "What is a great honor?" Sasame almost cried out. "To build a village from the ashes of another? Where is the honor in that?" "Our village was destroyed, shunned, cursed... All because of that one cursed ninja who was pardoned for his crimes while we stayed aloof, fending for ourselves - barely..." "And blaming everyone else but ourselves for it!" the woman yelled. "We couldn't form a unity because each one of the clans are too egoistic to put personal matters aside and name a leader for the prosperity of Otogakure! Why should we go wage war on an innocent nation because of this?! Why can't we make allies out of them instead of enemies?!" "No, we suffer because of Orochimaru!" Hideyoshi spat, spinning around to look at her. "And if disrupting his peace meant attacking his former village, so be it! What did that so-called peace treaty bring upon us?! Otogakure was cast aside as if a useless doll - no one gave us a second thought!" "No one has to. We could solve all of our problems ourselves if we had enough backbone and a clever and selfless enough leader!" "That's enough." The man's voice was cold and hard. "You ordered Fuma out of this mission but the others all agreed to it." "And your leader hand-picked you and brainwashed you enough to repeat his own words to me. You can fool anyone but me - your heart is not entirely in this mission, either." Hideyoshi only avoided her gaze for a second, but when he looked back at her, his gaze was determined. "I know where my loyalties lie. Oto will be reformed, brought to glory. If it was to be on the blood of your friend, the Hokage..." His words were like a knife through her heart. "...so be it." Regaining her composure, Sasame straightened her back, her gaze and voice just as cold. "If you get out now... You can't come back as Fuma Sasame's husband." Hideyoshi stopped dead in his tracks as he reached to get out of the tent, and turned to look at her with sad, almost heart-broken eyes... And for a moment, Sasame couldn't even breathe as guilt and sadness washed upon her... [End of Flashback] Sasame opened her eyes with a tear, and saw Kazuhiro was still gazing at her carefully. "Mama..." "Kazuhiro, you have an important mission from now on." she mused softly, looking at the boy with a broken smile. "You are gonna have to take care of your brother and sister..." "He is not coming back..." the young boy stated, not as a question, just as a means of voicing the simple truth. "I'm afraid not, my dear child..." Sasame tried to control the trembling in her voice. "So you will be the one to fill his void... The best as you can..." As he nodded grimly, the woman was wondering how she was ever going to fill the void in her heart... ... The young woman knelt before the other two, who were finishing their preparations. "God dammit! They are here! There are twelve Konoha ninjas out there!" Hearing that, Suzume's heart skipped a beat, her eyes widening. That was what she had feared - although now to think of it, most likely what the Yoshida and the other clans planned when they left her with this punishment. She was a disgrace... If she could manage to go back unscathed, she would be allowed to have a clean slate. If not... It didn't really matter if she died here. She had just counted on the possibility that the Konoha ninjas wouldn't reach Oto this quickly. "Okay, we have to come up with a plan. This means four ninjas for each..." "Wait. Who told you we would be fighting?" The woman's head turned to her comrade. "What?" "They are here for you, not us." the second woman said matter-of-factly. "We are not gonna stand here and risk our skins." "Together we have a better chance against them!" Suzume spat, a fire burning in her eyes. "What makes you think they won't come after you if I don't make it out?!" "Then you better make sure to stop them. After all... that's the least you can do after how you failed so miserably." And with that, the two women sprinted towards the trees, leaving a horrified Suzume behind... ... The forest was quiet. Only sounds of nature waking up surrounded him as Konohamaru walked further into the clearing, his keen eyes searching everywhere, detecting every simple movement. Letting his breath out in one curt sigh, Konohamaru took another step forward... And came to a stop as he felt the sharp and cold tip of a kunai against his throat. "I assume you are looking for me." came the cold, unconcerned voice of a woman behind him. The young jounin didn't even think about it as instinct took over. In one quick motion, he dodged the blade, bent down on his knees and spun around to kick the woman's legs out from under her. Then he jumped back a little to put some distance between them and as the woman got up, he got his first glance of her. And he did take in all aspects of her appearance... Recording all of the details of this hated woman into his memory... from her black hair tucked back into the bandana of her protector with only two bangs falling before her eyes to the black eyes, black as coals... "Yoshida Suzume." he practically spat out her name, his voice filled with so much disgust. "I am here to exact justice on you for the crimes you committed against Konoha." His eyes narrowed. "And for harming my student." The woman chuckled. "Oooh, how touching... But for that..." There was a flash of light, and the next second the brunette looked, Suzume was no longer standing a few feet away from him. "...you have to catch me first." came her voice from above, from the canopy of trees. ... "Lord Sixth," Kakashi heard Kiba's voice in the ear piece. "We are closing in on them. What is our next..." Before he could finish, there was an explosion of a loud, high-pitched and ringing sound and Kakashi had to pull out the earpiece in the nick of time to protect his hearing. As the powerful blast died down slowly, the former Hokage brought the piece to his ear once again. "What is going on? Is everyone alright?" No sound came, only a weird buzzing. Cursing under his breath, he did a quick hand seal, and was suddenly surrounded by lightning... ... "You moron!" The woman ran to her friend. "I told you not to do it! You're still not an expert on sound blasts!" The woman on the ground tried to get up, but it was apparent that she wasn't doing a good job - her balance was too set off. "We needed to stop them - they were about to catch us!" Hearing a buzzing sound, the other looked up and around, gritting her teeth. Nothing could be seen, but she was sensing a powerful chakra... an insanely powerful chakra. "Good luck with that, you idiot! I'm out of here!" "What?!" the woman yelped, positively alarmed. "Wait!" But the former had already started to disappear through the trees. Clenching her jaw, the woman got to her feet, slowly, shakily... Her hands then moved to the crossed swords on her back, extracting two thin and long swords.

If it had to come down to a fight, they might as well have a taste of the Fujaku Hisho Shoken. (2)

... So that was how she wanted to play it, huh? He had made his plan as soon as she got lost between the trees. Without wasting any time, Konohamaru used a fire jutsu to create a huge fire wall in front of him, then punched the ground, which caused a whirlwind to be born. Using the air currents to his advantage, the jounin then sent the whirlwind, powered by the flames, directly to the cluster of trees. She wouldn't just stand around to get roasted. She would have to come down. Sure enough, he saw a flash of blue that probably meant she was using a water technique to meet the inferno. Light smoke began covering the area - which gave him a chance to prepare his second attack. Inhaling, the brunette let out a huge cloud of ashes from his mouth and then, jerking his head back to activate the trigger, he watched as flames instantly covered the area... A huge explosion went off, illuminating the dark sky. Konohamaru then took out eight shurikens, one in between each finger, and waited... "Geez, you're indeed going all out, aren't you?" Turning around quickly, he saw the woman for a moment before he threw half of the shurikens at her, but the next he looked, she wasn't there at all. "That kid must have really meant something to you." Turning to the second direction, Konohamaru threw the second group of the shurikens. Suzume tut tutted, her voice almost sounding like she was enjoying herself. "Now now, these rash actions won't do, will they?" "You bit-" "Hey, watch out that tongue. This is not how you talk to a lady." "News flash, I will never consider you a lady." "Hah. Guess I will have to show you, do I? Torpedo Nails!" When he heard that, the brunette jumped into the air and away from where he was just standing, just as small pieces of whatever weapon she was using embedded themselves into the ground. Not wanting to take any chances, Konohamaru put his hands together to create shadow clones. Precariously, three of the clones walked forward. As soon as they tried to take another step, though... They couldn't. Then hundreds of nails shot from the ground, and Konohamaru jumped behind a tree as the clones disappeared with a poof sound. Suzume had also hid herself behind a tree, hiding with the camouflage technique. Damn, this wouldn't do... She needed some extra help. ... Just before she used the swords to launch herself into the air, she saw someone, someone shrouded in a bright armor of lightning as it seemed, running into the clearing she had just been. Okay... lightning shouldn't be hard. Landing on a branch, the woman quickly did a set of hand signs, and then held her hands in a triangle, positioning them so that she could see the person in between them. "Curse Mandala!" she shouted, and her opponent came to a dead stop as a glowing green pyramid shape materialized around him, trapping him inside. Smirking, the woman began pulling her fingers closer. As the pyramid got tighter and tighter, though... Suddenly there was a poof sound, and the man was no longer there. "Excuse me," then came a drawl from behind her, and she immediately turned back, only to gaze into the face of a white haired man. "But I think you got the wrong one." Thinking quickly, the woman used the swords to slash at him, but next she saw, he was not there. Losing her already unsettled balance, she fell from the tree, but thanks to her wind cutter technique, she landed safely. "Passing Fang!" Without catching her breath properly, she saw something... a ferociously spinning something, which looked like a drill, heading to her way and raised her swords to counter it, but hard... it was so hard to maintain her ground like this... The power forced her to take a few steps, driving her back. Gritting her teeth, she tried her best to resist it... But it was futile. Not long after that, she felt the force of the technique throwing her back, like a rag doll, right into a rock. As she tried to get up, bringing a hand to her head, she heard the two men talking among themselves. "Are all of you okay, Kiba? What happened back there?" "It was nothing we couldn't handle, Lord Sixth, we were just caught unprepared for a second." Lord Sixth?! The woman's eyes widened. Did... a village leader... come seeking them out?! Well, shit. "That's right. I'm the Sixth Hokage, Hatake Kakashi, and it’s not possible you could escape judgement after attacking the Leaf." she heard the drawl once again as she straightened herself up. "It would be in your better interest if you surrender now without resistance..." "Well... I'm sorry, Rokudaime-sama," the woman said from between gritted teeth, emphasizing the last word sarcastically. "But I'm Kamiko from the Yoshida clan, and the Yoshida knows no such thing as surrender." She then brought her hands together to create balls of flame and threw them randomly towards the space between them, causing explosions and creating an opening for her to go into hiding. On Kakashi's signal, Kiba jumped towards the trees to take another place. "If you think you can run from us forever, think again." the former Hokage said, bringing his hands together to create lightning. Out of the charge came two hounds, who growled at him in recognition before running away. ... Suzume bit her thumb and let a bit of blood trail from the wound before slamming her hand on the ground, creating a black shape. "Kuchiyose no Jutsu!" A huge, poisonous green and yellow snake erupted from the ground, coiling around itself before meeting her eyes. "Kessha, bury him to the ground!" Hissing once, the snake rose high into the air before slamming on the earth with a huge bang that shook almost the entire forest, and slid underground. Konohamaru had heard her move. Acting quickly, he also slammed his palm on the ground and yelled, "Kuchiyose no Jutsu!" A huge monkey wearing a Konoha headband appeared in front of him, and as soon as he did, he yelled, "Jump!" Without hesitation the brunet did as he was told, and just when he jumped, a snake burst through the ground, baring his fangs at him. With a primeval shriek, the monkey transformed itself into a long, black and yellow staff and cloned itself right before Konohamaru landed, creating some sort of a prison wall in front of him. The snake's bared fangs collided with the many staffs that had made the wall, but the prison itself wasn't even shaken. At that time, the snake caught the eyes that were protruding from the staff, and its eyes widened. Without going for another attack, it slid back into the hole and disappeared from the view. The staff returned to its original size, releasing Konohamaru from where he was trapped, and the jounin held the staff in one hand in an attack pose while reaching for a kunai with the other. "Enma..." (3) "No words needed, boy. Better not let your guard down." the monkey king spoke from the staff. "We have faced this enemy before." ... The woman's eyes widened when she saw Kessha returning to her. "What do you think you are doing?! Keep attacking, he is not dead yet!" "Are you serious?!" the snake asked in a feminine voice, obviously furious and panicked. "You want me to fight with the fucking monkey king Enma?! Are you out of your mind?!" "So what?!" Suzume yelled, equally pissed off. "Stop being a hebiko (4), and finish them off!" ... "Wait, what do you mean we faced them before?" Konohamaru asked with a frown, thoroughly confused. "You remember back when you summoned me in the orphanage attack?" Enma's arm stretched out from the staff and he touched the adamantine with it, as if tapping his nose. "My nose never failed me. That snake the woman just used was one of those who were present in that attack." For a moment, the brunet didn't even know what to say. "W-what...?" "As you just heard it," the monkey said, glancing at him. "This woman was definitely involved in the attack against Konoha." Konohamaru's mind was reeling, so many questions and thoughts... What did this even mean? That the Sound was once again playing as Orochimaru's pioneers? Was there an even greater scheme behind all of these? Or... he didn't want to think of this, but he was a jounin and he was supposed to look at it from all angles, no matter how disturbing they might be... Was there a possibility... that the sannin wasn't involved in it... at all? He was lost in thought for a moment, he didn't notice the impending threat until Enma called out. "Watch out!" Looking up just in time, the brunette used the staff to ward off the lights, but one of them came too close to his arm, and he hissed in pain as something seared it. Then he heard the woman's high, cold laughter. "Uh oh, guess we just got busted, aren't we?" she said in a sing-song voice, which irritated the man even more. "You couldn't deny the mastermind behind the plan, though, admit it! You numb skulls didn't even suspect a thing!" "What the hell are you talking about?!" "Did you know it took us a lot of time to finally copy that damned curse seal so we can frame that bastard? It was no easy feat, and even harder to create three snakes all at once - just a couple of months ago I could only call forth two." "You..." words were failing him, he was so outraged. There was a whoosh sound right behind him then, and using the kunai he drew out earlier, he slashed, only to meet the air. “Oooh wait… did I see that blade somewhere before?” These words drew the young man’s gaze back to the kunai, and he did a double-take. He hadn’t even realized he pulled out the kunai he had gifted Mitsuki the one he found, still buzzing with lightning, on their way out of the village. His grip only tightened more on the blade as he heard the woman laughing once again, only her voice sounded from far away. "Wait, just answer me this... was that child in some way related to that snake bastard? I thought as much when he looked up at me... Was that the reason you guys kicked him out of the village? Wow, now even we couldn't have planned that!" "What does it matter if he is related to him or not?" Konohamaru yelled in rage, creating another set of clones. "He is still a child!" He then used the clones to throw shurikens towards the woman's voice from all directions. "Did you know that he begged for his life?" the woman then said, from right behind him. This time, his body acted before his mind. Lightning fast, he reached out to grab the woman's shoulder and flipped himself over her in one quick motion. As soon as he landed, still holding on to her, he threw her over himself, basically slamming her into the ground. Without giving her a chance to recover, grabbing the adamantine staff tightly, he brought the end of it, hard, to Suzume's head, seeing her eyes widening in shock. "Cranium crusher!" Just before the staff touched her, though, the woman had disappeared in a flash. The jounin stood there for a moment, enraged. How the fuck did that just happen?! A few feet away, crouched behind a rock, the Oto kunoichi brought a hand to her chest. That... had been close. ... Hearing the growls of the lightning beasts as they drew closer, Kamiko gritted her teeth, she had to do something about them - fast. Turning around, she once again used the swords to create powerful air blasts - slice after another slice - and sent them after the hounds. Easily dodging them, one of them came running at her, its fangs bared, at which the woman dug one of the swords to the ground, swinging around it and kicking the air currents at the creature's face. Although it stopped the hound, its lightning did catch her left foot and the woman cursed as she knelt on the ground, holding it. Damn, this was going to make things hard for her. Hearing a sound right then, Kamiko took a dozen shurikens and threw four of them randomly, towards the cardinal directions. She saw a ninja rushing towards her from one direction, and she pulled the strings attached to the shuriken to make it fly towards the enemy, but the weapon passed through him and the body disappeared. A clone... The real ninja then jumped her from a completely different direction, forcing her to get up, which caused pain to shout up through her left leg. She didn't have time to concentrate on it, though, as she saw the opponent's fist soaring towards her face. So he was going to rely on taijutsu, huh? Well, that was just fine with her. Gathering chakra to the tips of her fingers, she prepared to launch her attack. This was meant to cause the sound waves emitted by the body, the heartbeat for example, to respond to her chakra and make a pressure powerful enough to cause some serious damage. Bonus points if she managed to hit the enemy in the chest area. So they fought, but her opponent was good. It was apparent that he was very skilled, as he managed to dodge her every move. Her hand did come close to his body once or twice, but caused nothing more than a flinch. Just when she made another move, the ninja suddenly brought up his left arm and right leg and before she knew it, her arm was caught in between them. A crack was heard. Crying out loud from the pain, Kamiko fell on the ground, holding the broken arm. Seeing that the man was still advancing, she tried to reach one of the swords using her left arm... Out of nowhere, tiny wires wrapped around the sword and before she could touch it, the weapon broke into tiny pieces. Eyes widened in shock, she turned around herself to reach for the other, but before she could do that, a powerful blast of power sent her flying. Just when she was about to get up again, she felt something... a powerful, burning electric surge directed to her back, not piercing it, but its presence so threatening that she found it impossible to even take another step... "Chidori. A thousand birds." came the voice of the sixth behind her. "One hit and you will die the worst death... Suffering as your insides burned on with hundreds of volts." Feeling the kunoichi shiver before him, Kakashi continued in the same cold tone. "Surrender now. It's over." There was really nothing else she could do. Slowly, cursing under her breath for it... She raised her hands up. ... Suddenly hearing a buzz from his ear piece, Konohamaru concentrated on it, while his keen eyes searched everywhere for Suzume. "We are done here, Konohamaru. It's all up to you now." Hearing that, a big grin etched its way on his face. That was it... "Did you hear that?" he yelled towards the woman, although he knew that she probably didn't. "Your little friend is finished. You are all alone now!" "Oh. Just like how you left that kid alone?" came the woman's voice. "I know what you did. I know how you trapped him so we couldn't hear him!" "Bet you didn't know how he was crying when we were finished with him, though?" came her whisper from right behind him then, and for a moment... everything came to a stop as the jounin froze... literally froze. He didn't believe her other words from before... He knew Mitsuki would never beg for his life and he knew for sure that no matter what that woman believed, he wasn't sent away from Konoha, Lord Seventh would never allow that... But... he... was crying...? How deeply must he have been hurt - not just physically but emotionally too - after what he had gone through in the village...? And they could do nothing to stop it... He himself had failed as his sensei... "Boy look out!" he heard Enma's voice, but then it was too late. He hadn't noticed Suzume sneaking up behind him. There was an explosion and Konohamaru felt himself thrown into the air, with a burning pain in his back. He landed a few feet away, and brought a hand to his wounds as he tried to get up. Enma was beside him in a second, with a disapproving look on his face. "Didn't I tell you not to get distracted? Zoning out is the last thing you would want to do with someone like her around! Get a grip already!" "I-I know," the brunet mumbled. "I'm fine..." Then he once again heard the voice of the Lord Sixth coming from the earpiece, although his tone was harsher than before. "Konohamaru. If you are going to be careless, I will have to step in." Then his voice softened a little. "You have come this far this good. You wanted to fight her alone. Don't let me take this chance away from you now." Those... were just the words he needed. Closing his eyes, Konohamaru straightened himself and got up, forgetting about the pain for a moment to concentrate on ending this. Focusing on his chakra, he called upon a rasengan... A big one... and watched it as it got bigger... [Flashback] ...this... this was not happening... It felt like time had stopped, trapping Konohamaru inside his own personal hell as he watched, too shocked to even breathe, his student... passing away... right before his very eyes… What he wouldn't give to be dying in Mitsuki's place right now... He was too young... Just barely thirteen... He did not deserve this - he deserved to live!... "...Sh... Shall I announce the time...?" When he heard the nurse... all of a sudden, he snapped back to life. Without seeing eyes, he strode to the door and burst it open, rushing inside... Two of the nurses managed to barely stop him before he reached the bed, and Konohamaru tried to control his breathing as he looked at an unmoving Mitsuki. "Konohamaru-san, please..." one of the nurses mumbled, tearing up. "Mitsuki!" the jounin yelled, barely recognizing his own voice, filled with so many emotions. "You can do this, kiddo, don't give up! You are so much stronger than this! Come back to us!" "Konohamaru-san, please you have to step back...!" said one of the nurses, she barely had the strength to push back a man like Konohamaru and he was clearly not accepting his student's death but... there was nothing more they could do...! The kid... was gone... his heart didn't respond... "Tsunade-sama...?" murmured the second nurse, looking at the former Hokage. "Wait... wait just a second..." Sakura mumbled in Tsunade's place, her eyes still on the machine. "Sakura-san... It might be too much already..." One of the nurses warned her. "No... no, please... please don't give up on him... He's strong, he'll pull through... I'm begging you, please don't give up..." Konohamaru said, almost as if in a trance. "Let's just leave the child in peace..." another nurse said, her voice shaky. Tsunade snapped back to herself and hastily hushed the nurse, staring at Sakura. "Sakura-san..." But as the nurse was about to mumble the same words as before... a tiny but sudden sound erupted from the machine, causing everyone's eyes to immediately set at it. As the heart rate slowly, very slowly fell back to a steady rhythm, Sakura broke into a smile, and laughed softly, while tears fell down from her eyes. "You really do like your surprises, don't you?" she mused fondly, leaning over to kiss Mitsuki on the top of his head. A tear fell on the closed eye of the child. Tsunade smiled too, but it was a broken smile. "Really, kid... I'm not a young woman anymore, don't scare us like that..." Konohamaru was hit by such a huge wave of relief that he almost couldn't stand his ground. He brought his hand over his mouth as he began to softly cry himself. He didn't object this time as the nurse told him he should really wait outside, and silently retreated out of the room, his eyes on Mitsuki all the time. [End of Flashback] He heard a sliding sound, trees crushing as the giant snake once again made her way to him. His eyes, however, were locked on the woman, who stood behind the beast, a disgusting smirk all over her face... And Konohamaru stroke forward. He swung the adamantine staff towards the snake, enlarging the staff. Enma burst out at the end of it, wrapping his arms around the snake before he pierced her throat with his fangs. And before she could do anything... Konohamaru had grabbed the woman by her collar, slamming her into a tree... Suzume's eyes widened for one last time before the rasengan hit her chest with full force. It was over... ... Enma turned to his normal form as the other Konoha ninjas gathered around, all just silently looking at the brunet. The monkey king had a small smile on his face, his look both exasperated and proud. 'You have quite the grandson, Sarutobi...' he thought to himself. ... Dropping the woman's body to the ground, the jounin looked at her expressionlessly, feeling only... relieved... a whole... [Flashback] Konohamaru felt so proud of his students... The second round of the Chuunin exams was over, and they had managed excellent teamwork. Much better than what he expected, really, what with Boruto being Boruto... Speaking of which, he noticed two genins in his team were approached by their family, receiving cheers and congratulations, big smiles on their faces... and of course, Boruto had been in a gloating mode... The next thing he noticed was his third student... standing all by himself, a couple of feet away from them, just looking at his two teammates and their families with a small smile. And something about that bothered the young jounin. About how Mitsuki had no one to cheer for him, at least for that moment... Making his decision, he started walking towards him. The blue haired boy was surprised when he felt a hand on his shoulder. He turned around to gaze into the smiling face of his sensei. "Well done, kiddo, great job," Konohamaru said encouragingly. "I knew you guys would do it." And slowly, the boy's face broke into a full-on smile as well... [End of Flashback] 'Thank you... sensei...' Hearing the faint voice brought by the wind itself, the brunet's eyes widened for a moment. Before he knew it, he had fallen on his knees beside Suzume's body, his head bowed low as he started weeping softly, and the sun's first rays began seeping through the trees...        

--

A.N:

(1) Remember or note down these names. They are gonna be very important in the following projects. (2) You can search this and almost all of the technique names listed on this chapter on Narutopedia. (3) This Enma is the Enma who was Hiruzen's personal summon. We do not use Konohamaru's canon summons, the toad or the monkey, in our storyline. (4) This literally means snake child, but I used it here to mean "baby snake", as in Suzume telling Kessha to stop acting like a scared baby.

[starfighter10]

tlou2 opinion

So I really had to share my opinion(rant) on the last of us part 2 and boy I have a lot to say. I am gonna dwell deep into this one, so bear with me if you can and want to

 But before that I have to share the feelings I hold for tlou1.Back when I finished tlou1, I knew I experienced something truly magical. I was pleasantly surprised by the beautifully crafted story, the execution of the characters, the music, the gameplay , and the effort that went into shaping the journey of the game,the character arcs and bonds. You could see and experience the uniqueness and passion that went into the first project. This game immediately became a favourite of mine.

When tlou2 was announced, my expectations were skyhigh,was elated to continue Joel and Ellie's journey and how it unfolds. The bar set by the first one was exceptionally high and probably impossible to achieve, but I had trust and faith in naughty dog, thought they couldn't go wrong with this one. After experiencing tlou2 , I am speechless.... not in a good way. I have no words to express my disappointment,frustration and anger I feel right now. I don't even know where to begin.... the absolute mess of a plot, the original characters being blatantly ignored, retconned and disrespected in favour of new bland characters, the plotholes in the story, the false advertising and marketing, naughty dog's hubris, making a complete mockery of your fans who are paying money to play something but getting baited for something else. I am utterly heartbroken and angry.

The plot - the driving force of the game is over ambitious, lazy,sloppy and nihilistic. It felt forced. Naughty dog bit off more then they could chew with this one. Tlou2 could have gone several ways in terms of plot with the existing characters, yet we get the cliche revenge plotline with the character abandoning the quest altogether to realise revenge isn't the answer. This trope has been done several times before, with more finesse and better execution. The writers aim for the " Ellie breaks the cycle of the revenge" but it really fails to achieve this as she blatanly annihilates several characters,npcs along the way in quest of her revenge. The damage has been done practically speaking. According to naughty dog's logic , I should expect Nora's sister or a random npc's friend/relatives in tlou3 hunting down Ellie in their revenge quest. Also Abby's quest literally does nothing for me. This character was so poorly written, executed and shoved down our throats, I didn't have any sort of attachment or empathy for her. I simply don't care about this character.

The circumstances that lead to Joel's death was out of character as well. Since the trailer drop in 2016, I was prepared for his inevitable death. Thought he would probably go out like the badass he is, maybe sacrificing himself for Ellie/tommy. The Joel I know from tlou1, a hardened survivor who has fought tooth and nail to survive the past 20 years would NEVER end up in a situation like that. Joel was intensely alert, critical,clever and intuitive. The argument here may be that he has softened in Jackson, but I feel at this point this should be 2nd nature to him. Something that is automatic. Yet the writer's now want you to believe he is a dumbass who would trust a group of strangers, make small talk and introductions and end up in a situation like that. One of the bigger issues was the constant reinforcing that Joel wiped down the fireflies in cold blood and doomed humanity for death by robbing them of their cure for survival,Ellie believing the cure would have been a guaranteed sure shot success ..... WHY? This retcons the first one completely. The beauty of the tlou1 was it's moral ambiguity and uncertainty. We were constantly hinted that fireflies is a mess of a group whose agendas weren't clearly known, whose actions caused the sacrifice of many people for the sake of a slight possibility of a cure.They were power hungry and were cruel enough to send a 14 year old girl to her death with no remorse,consent or any proper investigation or medical research. Joel initially negotiates to find someone else, gets shut down immediately, gets his means of survival snatched and was practically marched to his death. He had no option but to wipe clean these people who planned on killing someone dear to him, for something that is uncertain or in vain. And yes this was a selfish decision on Joel's part, and that was the beauty of it. The moral ambiguity. He was right or wrong or both - open to your interpretation. BUT NOW NAUGHTY DOG WANTS TO TO ERASE ALL THAT DEVELOPMENT. The active reinforcement that Joel was a cold, ruthless murderer who killed fireflies and deprived humanity of its cure? Trying to erase the fact that he was surviving and trying to keep his dear ones safe in this cold, brutal and unforgiving postapocalyptic world. So that we sympathize with Abby and enjoy golfing the tf outa Joel?. Ellie seems like a different character in this one, but again this character is immediately pushed to a whirlwind of traumatic events right from the start of the game. I missed her spark of joy,humour and enthusiasm. The treatment of the main chatacter in her own game is utterly cruel and disappointing, and seemed unfair to me. By the end, Ellie is broken beyond repair. Though she thematically chooses to be the better person and gives up on her vengeance and hate, she still manages to be on the losing side as she ends up losing her father figure which was her closest bond, loses Dina and the kid , she doesn't have her community, her people, her fucking fingers as well. Why? So Ellie could suffer a little more and be unable to do most important thing that bonded her to Joel. Not to mention she loses her switchblade too, her mother's final memory. Surprised that ND spared her mother's letter . Feel her pain and despair. Why does Ellie get such a shitty,depressing, worthless, futile and a hopeless conclusion while Abby not only gets her revenge successfully, forms a close bond in Lev and gets to escape possibly to a fresh start. Ellie? Nah she gets to suffer alone. Her BIGGEST FEAR has become a reality by the end. The least they could do is let Ellie have some solace and calm, surrounded by her loved ones on that farm,her trying to recover from her trauma slowly but surely, it's what joel would have wished for. But no, she is left all alone, absolutely traumatized, all by herself with nothing to look forward to. Oh and tommy is whole new character in every scene. So keep your eyes peeled for various versions of tommy throughout. The character inconsistencies are ridiculous.

The gameplay, beautiful sceneries, and new characters like dina and jesse are few of the positives of game - leaning more towards Jesse. Dina felt perfect for Ellie and Jesse did manage to lighten up few of the moments. The space shuttle cutscene, the museum flashback sequence, ellie and joel's flashbacks were the only parts that remotely captures the magic and beauty of tlou1. I got emotional watching them. The space shuttle sequence hits you with the feels. Joel slaying a bloater with a machete was cinematic art. (Hot too)

Abby... the forced deuteragonist, is an utter failure of character execution. Her character was forced onto us, felt hasty and lacked real build up. She starts off on the wrong foot by killing one of the most popular characters. If ND really wanted this character to work, the only possible way would have been to play her point of view and backstory prior to her mercilessly killing and torturing a guy who just saved her life. What was ND thinking? That a few hours of her pov,forced out of the blue background story, her getting to play with dogs while ellie has no option but to attack the dogs, the abby-lev bond which is pretty much discount or the walmart version ellie and joel would be enough to side with her over ellie and joel???? The part where they force you to play as abby against ellie? It made me sick. I felt cheated and disgusted.

The false advertising to make us believe joel is alive and good? That this is an ellie and joel centric game?To tug at your heartstrings like this. A complete mockery of the fans who waited 7 years to see their favorite characters get horribly treated,retconned, disrespected and thrown under the bus in favour of new unlikable characters. Butchering the heart and soul of the last of us - Joel and Ellie's bond. The fact that these two don't even get a heart to heart before his death, that Joel dies uncertain of ellie's future, maybe thought he could not save Ellie in those final painful moments, that she had never forgiven him, Ellie never getting her closure with Joel, or really getting to tell him how much he meant to her.... all these thoughts legit made me shed tears. Broke my heart. This is how much ND wanted to honour and respect ellie and joel.

The game's conclusion is hollow, futile, worthless and depressing. And in my opinion, this is non canon. This is the only way I can cope with this unsastifying conclusion. It is immaturity I guess... but I will feel better about it.

Though I utterly despise tlou2, tlou1 will continue to remain one of my favorite pieces of work in fiction. JOEL FUCKING MILLER WILL ALWAYS BE THE BADDEST BITCH AND NOTHING WILL CHANGE THE LOVE I HAVE FOR HIM.

If someone actually read it all the way, thank you for your time and effort. Really needed to rant and let these negative emotions out.

[lynndoublelegacy]

just a cool dnd meme i saw

Yook so it’s less a meme and more like. a big ol questionare but hey, might as well do it. originally saw it on @/probablyottrpgideas, go check them out

1. Game Master, Player, or both? Why?

Ok so technically I’ve DMed twice but I really don’t find it fun? and don’t ever want to do it again. so. Player. I like building characters and their connections with fellow PCs more than building worlds

2. When did you start roleplaying? How old were you?

oh god, if we’re talking about roleplaying in general? I’ve been doing it basically as long as I can remember. As a kid I would play House, and then once I got older in like 5th grade I actually started making characters and playing out their stories with friends. Google+ is what made me realize this was actually like, a THING, though, and I got into some roleplaying groups there, then on DevaintArt. Dungeons and Dragons is a newer development? I got into it in late 2018 when my sister’s friend invited us to a one-shot, and... well, yea, I got hooked lol

3. What was the first roleplaying book you ever owned?

dude, bold of you to assume I really own any. I don’t have that kind of money and literally only own the Guide to Wildemount, and that was a gift

4. Describe the first game you ever ran or played in.

I mean... it’s not a game but ima describe the one shot, bc my first campaign was a hot mess without a true storyline and I used the same character for it anyway. I played a tiefling bard called Aisling Kai (I didn’t know this was a cliche combo at this point, and I honestly played her like a rogue with a music motif but Whatever) and we were a little group tasked to figure out why the hell anyone who goes into this cave never comes out. So we go in, make our way through the dungeon, fight some frog people (I made one of their ears bleed just by getting a nat 20 on a performance check to play a high f# on flute, that was fun, FWEET), and turns out yep, theres a hill giant down here. We kicked his ass and collapsed the cave on top of us (dw I think we were fine but my memory is a little screwy)

5. What system did you grow up with? / 6. Which system do you play now?

i learned on and currently play dnd 5e. I don’t really know anything else, but I’m debating checking out Vampire of the Masquerade.

7. Longest campaign you’ve run or played in?

That would be my Tal’Dorei campaign group, aka The Fatefallen! Started in the Fall of 2019 and still going to this day, just played our 45th session last week. I play Ilia Liadon, the drow grave cleric, and the only member of our party who has been there for every single session since the beginning.

8. Where did you meet your current gaming group?

...well first I feel the need to mention that I have 3 different groups (2 of them are on hiatus now for pandemic related reasons but! we’re still groups). My first group (with Aisling) was formed slowly over time as friends adopted friends into the group, I think it started as a school club? but that didn’t last long. The other two started from a different school club as well, though one has since branched out into other people as well. 

9. Strategic combat or dramatic plotlines?

I am a roleplayer first and a gamer second. Give me all of the backstories and dramatic plotlines. Don’t get me wrong, I still like combat, but story takes precedent for me.

10. Favorite RPG genre?

I don’t tend to define myself by genre? But I tend to fall into more of a fantasy, at most arcanapunk style. Give me all of the magic, and magic powered tech.

11. Your first character.

I got into her a little bit earlier, but my first character was Aisling, aka Calypso Kai. She was a homebrew subclass bard with a criminal background, who honestly? should’ve been a rogue. I’ve since rebuilt her into an Assassin Rogue/College of Eloguence Bard multiclasser, but this iteration was like. Baby her, baby me new to dnd, I did not know what I was doing. She tried to be edgy, but my mom energy came through HARD and she just. Never really had a set characterization. She deserves better and I plan on playing her better sometime in the future.

12. Your favorite character.

You are making me choose between my children. BUT, if I had to pick, either Ilia Liadon, or! Ashe Wednesday, a protector aasimar drunken master monk and my profile picture. Ashe also deserved a lot better from their campaign, so I have a massive soft spot for them, they were made during a really tough time in my life (as was Ilia) and was going through an equally rough time in-game, since I made them for a Curse of Strahd campaign without understanding what I was getting into. They’re my little rebellious asshole and I love them dearly, someone get this kid therapy. Ilia, on the other hand, is just... she’s a comfort character for me at this point. mostly soft edges, such a mom- while Ashe was me yelling “come at me” at the world while crying, Ilia was just... embracing it. Making it better. basically, if they actually existed, I would die for both of them.

13. Your most ridiculous character.

I don’t usually play super ridiculous characters, but! I would say Keothi “Bookfinder” Vaimeil counts. She was basically me looking all of the goliath barbarian stereotypes in the eye, and going “nah. she’s a nerd.” She’s literally a massive puppy dog, just the sweetest big old thing, sitting in her house and reading all the books she can get her hands on in order to make up for her amnesia. Oh, and did I mention that she’s a zombie? ...yea. She’s wacky, but I love her.

14. The best in-character line you’ve ever had.

“I need sleep. I don’t even sleep and I need sleep.”

~Ilia, after a particularly tough fight and an emotionally draining day

15. Your most epic death.

Ok so... none of my characters in game have ever actually died during the storyline? Keothi obviously has in her backstory, and Ilia might have in hers as well, it was never explicitly stated, but during the game? Nope. Ashe got stupid close, but nope. Since Keothi is my only death period, and her death was pretty epic, I’m just gonna describe that. Her parents and siblings in her Goliath tribe had all fallen ill, so she decided to go searching for a possible cure, and ended up getting conned into helping this cult, since they said they would cure her family. Turns out, yea, they were lying, they just needed a goliath willing to sacrifice themselves with a cursed sword. They made the mistake of revealing this before Keothi was actually dead, so as she was dying, she brought the entire goddamn cultist temple down to the bottom of the sea and took the cultists with her. The sword was why she was undead, in the Shadowfell, and couldn’t remember anything.

16. Your most disappointing death. 

As mentioned, I’ve never died in campaign, but I feel like I have to mention this one that happened to our party in Curse of Strahd. We were in the death house, all 5 of us, still level 1, and our barbarian falls into a pit trap with spikes. None of us realize she’s actually dead, so we send out paladin down to get her... with the monk, the bard, and the warlock holding the rope. ....yea both of them died.

17. Something that shouldn’t have worked, but it did.

I’m stuck between two options for this one. First one was the time our water genasi paladin/rogue bloodbended our gnome cleric into a bridge to keep her from falling all the way down a ravine. The second time was when our party managed to defend a small seaside town from a pirate raid with just an NPC with Control Water, a ballista, ourselves, and some explosives. Neither should’ve worked, but both did. Having a triton in your party can really come in clutch in a seaside campaign.

18. Something that went hilariously awry.

I have one that’s hilarious and one that’s horrifying. Hilarious one: in my first ever campaign, someone from Aisling’s backstory popped up and our sorcerer went “that’s shady” (to be fair, he was) and then went to investigate BY HIMSELF. He obviously got kidnapped by the mafia, and then we went all stealth mission to break him out. Stealth was immediately abandoned after our other bard used a SCREAMING SWORD to break open the locks, then we proceeded to go out the way we came, setting everything on fire on the way out, and with our bard lying their way out the front door (with the rest of us in tow as “prisoners”) by pretending to be a fellow mafia member. It was great. Horrifying one: Ilia tries to Send to a member of the party who left in order to let him know that a fellow party member had died. Forgot that he left bc his mind was invaded by a previously dead, very evil old god, and ends up trapped there with him for a while. Ended up with all of our main spellcasters trapped in their own heads while the barbarian paced around worriedly and the rogue decided he was going to get smashed instead of worrying himself silly.

19. Your most memorable in-character moment.

There are a LOT in Ilia’s campaign, but! If I had to pick one, it would actually be a pretty recent one involving Ilia and our party’s wizard, Liara. They’re basically the embodiment of head vs heart? Anyway, Liara is currently suffering from something called magic corruption, though idk if suffering is the right word. Anyway! It basically resulted in her getting... possessed? by her own magic during the night during Ilia’s watch, and they had a really, really interesting conversation regarding guilt, death, and grief, and yea basically I love them. Honorable mention to our druid’s death (he’s back and better now, but that was my first long-time death in a game, we didn’t know he was coming back) and also the moment that Ilia realized that her childhood bff/crush had been revived in a new body and that this NPC was her best friend. That was a trip.

20. The coolest item you ever got and how you came to possess it.

I got this item in the revamp of my first ever campaign and nothing has topped it since which is Sad but hey. Anyway! I got this really cool, possibly cursed dagger after I threw a knife at an absolutely eldritch being and it got stuck in him as he transformed. It looked really badass, and allowed me to cast Inflict Wounds on occasion when I stabbed someone with it. So yea, we love that. Honorable mention to my paladin/bloodhunter’s Helm of the Aberrant Gladiator which allows you to basically do a bunch of fear based affects and psychic stuff.

Numbers 21 through 30 don’t apply to me but. yea. enjoy this summary of my dnd history I guess

[selenium-drive]

Stay Gold Chapter 9: Sacrifice

TW: Death, depictions of violence

Words: 12.4k

Series rating: Explicit

The remaining twenty minute long walk to the town under the rule of the Empire was filled with uneasy silence due to the nervousness the group felt about their spur of the moment plan, and the rising anxiety Aurelia felt the longer she was held "prisoner". Though they hated to admit it, Mando and Cara knew the visible discomfort she expressed made for a very convincing display of Mando himself and Aurelia as captured enemies. True unease was difficult to fake.

They approached the gates of the city where two Stormtroopers, one of which was lounging about on his speeder bike, guarded the entrance. "I have gifts for the boss," Karga motioned to both captive hunters. Aurelia did her best to stifle her nerves and keep her head down, remembering that she was indeed on a mission of great import. She doubted anyone from the Empire would know exactly who she was based on first glance; she herself had not interfered with Imperial affairs in the past, but her striking eyes had the potential be a dead giveaway as to what her bloodline was. She couldn't remember if Nevarro was one of the many planets her father had visited and included in his stories of victories against the Empire. If any of these Troopers stationed in this town had ever gone up against him, surely they wouldn't of even been kept alive to tell the tale. Still, word travels fast, especially when it comes to a problem that has to be dealt with. Her father and his crew had many, many enemies. It wouldn't surprise her if the warlord client once heard of a rebel Kage that used to meddle in their work. If that were the case, perhaps he would be able to recognize his daughter. After all, how many Kage lived outside the caves of Quarzite? Not many.

The Trooper posted at the gate scanned Karga's chain code and walked with them down the dusty streets crawling with even more Imperial soldiers. Both Cara and Aurelia couldn't help the burning hatred for such pests. It took all the self-discipline they had not to start picking off the mindless troops right then and there.

"You said four," Cara whispered harshly, her eyes darting from helmet to helmet of each enemy soldiers that passed by. "There are more than four Troopers."

"Four guarding the client," Karga fired back. "There are many more here in town. Things got really heated once Mando crashed the safe house."

"You did what?" Aurelia elbowed the Mandalorian walking alongside her.

"I told you before," he whispered, stooping down more to her level, "I wasn't proud that I took a job from an Imp. That, and they wanted to hurt the kid."

They turned into an alleyway, the sudden change from the wider, open street to a more private, closed off space making Aurelia more anxious than before. She wouldn't put it past the Stormtrooper guiding them to turn around and execute them here on the spot. They kept walking, however, until they reached a large wooden doorway near the end of the alley.

"Here we are," Karga said, beckoning them to follow him inside. The Trooper that led them to the meeting room joined up with three others who stood guarding an elegantly dressed elderly man. The Guild leader subtly nodded towards the rest of the soldiers in the room. "You see? Four."

Karga falsified the best smile he could. "Look what I brought you, as promised," he said triumphantly to the warlord, gesturing towards the Mandalorian and company.

The client approached Mando, extending his arm out to brush the back of his hand against the cool, polished steel chest plate and helmet. "What exquisite craftsmanship. It is amazing how beautiful beskar can be when forged by its ancestral artisans." He turned his attention back to Karga. "Can I offer you a libation to celebrate the closing of our shared narrative?" Mando stood still; from an outsider's perspective, he would've appeared uncaring or laid back. Aurelia knew him better than that. She knew how dangerous Mando could be when he was deceptively calm. He hated the audacity of this man for thinking he could lay a putrid hand on his armor, even if he was the one who supplied the Mandalorian with the steel to craft it.

"Please sit," the client directed after eliciting a nod from Karga. "It is a shame that your people suffered so," the Imp continued, taking a seat at a nearby round table. "Just as in this situation, it was all avoidable. Why did Mandalore resist our expansion? The Empire improves every system it touches. Judge by any metric. Safety. Prosperity. Trade. Opportunity. Peace..."

His rambling stopped when his eyes traced over the group seated across from him. He locked onto Aurelia, taking notice of her bright golden stare burning with anger. "Do you not agree with me, child?" He reached over Mando and Karga to brush the side of her face gingerly with his hand. Mando felt his body go rigid. If he weren't in such a vulnerable situation, he would've snapped the man's fingers in half one at a time.

Alongside him, Aurelia began to panic. Dank farrik, she knew she should've kept her eyes down. Her heart beat faster, praying to any gods out there that she wouldn't be recognized in any way. Her stubbornness and submissiveness battled with each other; she hated this man already and didn't want to back down and appear weak, but the knew the longer she looked into his own eyes, the higher the chance someone might know who she was.

"Such an odd thing, you are," he said curiously. "Yet, the hatred I feel you sending my way is the same as any other human or sentient species I've come into contact with before. You are all so blind as to what good the Empire can offer to you. Compare Imperial rule to what is happening now. Look outside, child. Is the world more peaceful since the revolution? I see nothing but death and chaos. The hardened stares from all of you only confirms to me that this is all you've seen, all you know as well. It's such a pity, is it not? The Empire wishes to change all of that, and now we have what we need to do it." He released his soft hold on her, Aurelia letting out a deep breath she didn't even know she was holding in once he stepped back towards The Child's bassinet. "I would like to see the baby."

"Uh...it is asleep," Karga stammered a little unconvincingly. Thankfully, the client still somehow believed him.

"We all will be quiet, just open the pram."

Cara tensed up, desperately fighting the urge to draw her blaster and kill the Imp before it was too late and their cover was blown. She looked to Karga for some kind of clue as to what the next move would be, but his wide eyed stare of his own uncertainty did nothing to provide her any consolation. As ironic as it was, a Stormtrooper happened to become their knight in shining armor. He stepped besides the client and whispered a few incomprehensible words into his ear.

"Don't think me to be rude," the elderly Imperial man apologized, "I must take this call."

He turned his back to the high-strung group still seated at at table. One of the Troopers placed a portable hologram communication pad on the bar's countertop, a bright blue glow emitting from in front of the warlord while he spoke to another unknown figure of authority.

Aurelia suppressed a flinch and almost slammed the tops of her knees into the underside of the table when she felt the outside of her knee inadvertently brushed by the back of Mando's hand when he maneuvered himself free of the confines of the bracers. She tried to suppress the blush forming on her cheeks when he slid the cuffs up onto her lap, the cool metal dragging slowly across the fabric of her pants. He reached across her lap and quickly undid her own restraints, setting both pairs of cuffs on her thighs.

"Hold these," he whispered, completely oblivious to fact of her sudden bashfulness due to his unexpected motions. "Give me the blaster," he motioned to Karga underneath the table.

"You've got one shot," he warned the bounty hunter.

Cara's short fuze was fizzling out. "This is bad. You said four."

Karga shot her a glare over his shoulder. "Well, there are more. What can I tell you?"

"Cara, my blaster," Aurelia whispered, her eyes scouring the room for any Stormtrooper who might be watching.

"Here. I'll give you everything else later," the dropper said hurriedly, slipping the small gun into Karga's hands. It traveled down the row from the Guild leader to the Mandalorian; the second it passed from Mando's leather gloves to Aurelia's fingerless gauntlets, the sound of shattering glass and rapid blaster fire erupted all throughout the common house. Mando kicked the table they were seated around over in an attempt to provide some sort of cover while they dove to the ground, crawling alongside the broken bits of glass, building wreckage, and Imperial bodies. They sought protection hugged tightly against the wall next to an elongated window where the countless shots were being fired though.

"Four Stormtroopers?" Cara shouted, knocking Karga roughly on the shoulder.

"Obviously there's more than kriffing four!" Aurelia swore angrily over the barrage of gunfire. The sudden onslaught took care of the issue of the client and the Troopers guarding him, but now there was a whole other, much worse, predicament at hand. When the dust had settled and the firing had stopped, the corned group snuck a peak out of the obliterated window behind the bar. An Imperial firing squad was the reason behind the attack, and transport vehicles full of more Troopers were joining their ranks. A few foot soldiers came flooding in from the streets, lining up with the rest and taking aim on the building Mando and the others took refuge in.

"This is bad." Cara grimaced. "Mando, we need to get out of here, now! If we get caught by them, then..." she shuddered at the thought.

He kept quiet but Aurelia could tell by the way his fingers clenched under his leather gloves that he was trying hard to map put their next move. He let out a huff and grabbed his commlink.

"Kuiil, are you back to the ship yet? Are you there? Do you copy?"

"Yes!" A strained voice came through, barely audible over the loud galloping of his blurrg.

"Are you back to the ship yet?"

"Not yet!"

"Get back to the ship and bail!" Mando exclaimed, hitting his fist up against the wall in pent up adrenaline. "Get the kid out of here. We're pinned down!"

"You have something I want," a male's voice rang out from the crowd of Stormtroopers.

"Who is this guy?" Cara motioned to an unseen figure outside the window. Mando paid her no attention. He tried speaking through the commlink once more.

"Kuiil, are you back to the ship yet? They're on to us. Kuiil, come in!" The growing sense of urgency in his voice made Aurelia start to panic. She tried to control her thoughts from assuming the absolute worse.

"Kuiil, do you copy?! Kuiil!"

Cara picked up on her growing level of anxiety. "He's fine," Cara attempted to reassure her. "He's probably boarding the ship right now. Just give him another minute and you'll see."

"Kuiil... Are you there?!"

"Yes, yes give him...give him a minute," Aurelia repeated uneasily.

"Come in, Kuiil! Kuiil, come in!" Mando glanced knowingly at her. He didn't have to say what either of them were thinking. Surprisingly, the non-existent expression that was still somehow evident through his helmet gave her the answer she didn't want to hear most of all.

"No, no give him a second! He just needs a second. He's fine! He's okay! They're okay!" Aurelia cried out. Her hands began to tremble and her eyes watered the more she felt the Mandalorian look on her with pity. Finally, he dropped his hand that was holding the commlink.

"No no no no! DON'T. DON'T!" Aurelia scrambled away from the bounty hunter when he slowly bent down and reached one hand out to hold her in place. "DON'T. TOUCH ME. NO! YOU CALL HIM AGAIN."

"Stop it! Dank farrik, pull it together!" Mando shot his hands forward and gripped both of her wrists tightly. He snatched her up, bringing her face closer to his helmet and shook her firmly. "We don't know what happened, but you have to focus on what's happening right here, right now."

The look of both terror and utter devastation broke the Mandalorian's spirit. He frowned heavily, hoping he didn't further upset her any. The only thing he could think of to do at that moment was place his hand gently on the top of her head. "Breathe, ad'ika. Just...breathe."

A small tear managed to escape from out over her lash line. It trailed down what small portion of skin she had exposed beneath her eyes, then absorbed into the cotton threads of her scarf. "He's dead, Mando."

"We don't know that for certain," he told her, his voice trying to sound soothing despite the blaring uncertainty seeping through. "We have to get out of here, then we'll find them. But first, I need you to focus."

"Is there another way out?" Cara asked.

Karga shook his head. "No, that's it."

"What about the sewers?" Mando asked, hoisting Aurelia up to her feet. Karga shrugged and looked at him unknowingly, leaving Mando to further elaborate. "The Mandalorians have a covert down in the sewers. If we can get down there, they can help us escape. Is there an entrance to them in here somewhere?"

"Guys, something's happening outside," Aurelia said shakily.

Cara peaked her head around the side of the window, her breathing intensifying and her mouth hanging wide open when she saw a team of Troopers assembling a massive firearm. It was something she recognized from her days of military service, and she knew it didn't mean good news for herself or her comrades.

"They're setting up an E-Web."

Karga backed against the wall I'm disbelief at the fate that was about to befall those in the common house. His legs threatened to give out from the sudden wave of grief that washed over him. "It's over," he whispered in defeat.

"Not yet," Mando pointed towards a bench situated up against a nearby wall. "I found the sewer vent."

"Then let's get the hell outta here," Cara ordered.

Everyone grabbed the corners of the bench, pushing and pulling it back to reveal a heavy, iron vent securely fastened in place. In a profound sense of urgency and desperate for a means of an escape, Cara fired her blaster in an attempt to weaken the bolted on metal bearings securing the grate to the wall. The thick metal remained securely in place, seemingly untouched.

"It's not working! We need something else!" She cried out in frustration.

"Hang on, move out of the way." Aurelia pushed past her and fired both of her grappling hooks in-between the cracks of the vent. The hooks opened up, securing themselves in place on the other side of the grate. "I'll pull, you fire. Maybe we can loosen it."

Cara shook her head in protest. "Those aren't going to be sturdy enough. They're just going to snap!"

"No, they won't," Mando spoke up. "It's beskar. It can take it."

He crept up behind Aurelia, admiring the polished silver cables and hooks coming out from her gauntlets. "You still never told me where you got those from," Mando said from over her shoulder. "Beskar steel belongs to the Mandalorians."

She chuckled darkly and widened her stance, preparing to put all of her strength into pulling back against the bolted in screws that separated the crew from freedom. "That's another story for another day, if we survive this one, that is."

Cara shot her blaster along the edges of the vent, hoping that in all the barrage of rounds she was firing off, maybe at least a few would weaken the integrity of the solid metal that prevented their escape. "It's not...working!" She shouted over the repetitive blasts.

Aurelia pulled back harder, cursing her lack of strength. Her wrists felt like they were going to snap and her forearms heavily ached from the cables pulling against her skin and muscles.

Mando stepped directly behind her and proceeded to wrap the beskar infused wiring around his own arm braces. The sudden, unexpected body contact caused Aurelia to lurch forward slightly, stopping her efforts of pulling against the grate.

"Keep going, ad'ika," Mando grunted, yanking back hard on the grappling hook's wires back in additional support. The sturdy cables and hooks withheld under the strength of their combined effort to pry the grate from the wall; the vent creaked and groaned under pressure but still held tight in place.

Cara set down her firearm in defeat after a few more passing moments of no success. "That's it," she said breathlessly. "It's over."

"Your astute panic suggests that you understand your situation," a male voice smugly spoke up from outside in the plaza. Aurelia detached herself hooks from the grate, her exhausted arms loosely hanging at her side. She turned her attention to the stranger addressing them, noticing a menacing looking military official standing in front of the rows of Imperial soldiers. "I would prefer to avoid any further violence, and encourage a moment of consideration," he continued. "Members of my escort have completed assembly of an E-Web heavy repeating blaster. If you are unfamiliar with this weapon, I am sure that Republican Shock Trooper Carasynthia Dune of Alderaan will advise you that she has witnessed many of her ranks vaporize mid-descent facing the predecessor of this particular model."

Cara stumbled back, clearly shaken by the knowledge the man standing on the other side of wall possessed. "H-how does he know-"

"Or perhaps the decommissioned Mandalorian hunter, Din Djarin, has heard the songs of the Siege of Mandalore, when gunships outfitted with similar ordinance laid waste to fields of Mandalorian recruits in The Night of a Thousand Tears."

"Don't think I overlooked you, Aurelia Vandorack," Moff Gideon continued proudly. She shot a worried expression towards Mando, panic beginning to set once she heard her full name. "I know of the crimes that your father, Kodo Vandorack, and his pathetic cluster of rebellious abominations, committed against the Empire in its glory days. You might think that the many years of servitude you've experienced at the hands of Tattooine bandit, Darro Obrik, was enough torment, but wait until you see what I have in store for you. You'll wish you were on Quarzite, being slowly crushed in weight of its uninhabitable atmosphere, regretting the day you sided with these people."

"Don't listen to him," Mando warned her. "He's trying to get in your head. He plays mind games, Aurelia. Don't let him win."

"I advise disgraced Magistrate Greef Karga to search the wisdom of his years and urge you to lay down your arms and come outside. The structure you are trapped in will be razed in short order and your storied lives will come to an unceremonious end."

"What do you propose?" Karga sputtered to the man seemingly in charge.

"Reasonable negotiation."

"What assurance do you offer?"

"If you're asking if you can trust me...you cannot," Moff Gideon said flatly. "Just as you betrayed our business arrangement, I would gladly break any promise and watch you die at my hand. The assurance I give is this: I will act in my own self-interest, which at this time involves your cooperation and benefit. I will give you until nightfall, and then I will have the E-Web cannon open fire."

"I don't trust him," Aurelia told the others. "He'll fire on us whenever he choses. I don't believe this man to be generous enough to give us more than a few hours and risk us coming up with a decision or plan an escape."

"This isn't just anyone. I know who he is," Mando spoke up. "It's Moff Gideon."

"No. Moff Gideon was executed for war crimes," Karga disagreed.

Mando shook his head. "It's him. He knew my name."

"So? What does that prove?"

"I haven't heard that name spoken since I was a child."

"On Mandalore?" Karga questioned further.

"I was not born on Mandalore."

"But you're a Mandalorian."

"Mandalorian isn't a race," Cara interjected.

"It's a Creed," Mando explained. "I was a foundling. They raised me in the Fighting Corps. I was treated as one of their own. When I came of age, I was sworn to the Creed. The only record of my family name was in the registers of Mandalore. Moff Gideon was an ISB Officer during the purge. That's how I know it's him. He says he needs us, which means The Child got away safely. I was worried when the Ugnaught didn't respond, but if they'd captured the kid, we'd already be dead."

"Maybe Kuill's fine after all," Cara tried to tell Aurelia comfortingly. "Mando, hail them again."

He nodded and brought the commlink to his helmet. "Come in, Kuii." They waited on edge for several seconds but got nothing back but the crackling sound of static.

"They might have jammed the link," Cara noted at the lack of response.

"Kuiil has been terminated," IG's robotic voice broke through the other side of the commlink.

"What did you do?" Mando growled. His eyes shifted under the cover of his visor to scope out Aurelia's reaction. Her stare remained fixed on the rocky debris beneath their feet, completely numb at the news. She had known all along. Even if she tried to convince herself otherwise, she wouldn't of believed anything different.

"I am fulfilling my base function," IG spoke up once more in reply to the Mandalorian.

"Which is?"

"To nurse and protect."

The distant shouts and gunfire of Stormtroopers in combat caused everyone within the vicinity to turn their attention towards the winding street leading to the plaza where the Troopers were stationed.

"Look!" Cara pointed. The intense stillness outside of the common house quickly erupted into a scene of all out war. A speeder bike launched itself into a crowd of several Troopers, smashing them against the walls of surrounding buildings and streets of Nevarro. The IG unit Kuill had reconstructed emerged from besides the wreckage, The Child strapped securely on its back, giggling maniacally and completely unaware of the magnitude of danger it was in.

It took everything Mando had not to run outside and grab The Child from out of harms way. He knew doing such a thing would be a suicide mission. There was no other choice but to fight at this point.

"I need you, Aurelia, a'dika," Mando pleaded quietly but firmly. He tore his gaze from the IG unit currently taking on the vast sea of Troopers to stare at the woman next to him. "I can't do this without you."

"I know," Aurelia smiled sadly. "I let Kuiil down and I'm not letting you or the kid down either." She quickly took her daggers and rifle from Cara who had been holding onto them since they first arrived into town.

Mando darted out from the safety of the building and began taking on the countless number of enemy soldiers gathered in the plaza. Karga and Aurelia followed him closely with their blasters drawn, taking aim on whoever they could. A handful of Stormtroopers rushed the entrance of the building all but Cara had emerged from. One set off a grenade, blasting the door down and creating a gaping hole in the exterior for more Imperial soldiers to rush through.

"Cara!" Aurelia called out after the debris had settled.

"I'm okay!" The dropper coughed violently from inside the building. The sound of continuous blaster fire and the screams of fallen enemy Troopers put Aurelia more at ease knowing the female veteran inside was fully capable of taking care of herself.

"There's too many!" She shouted, throwing one of her daggers into the chest plate of an advancing Stormtrooper. When she heard the fast approaching footsteps of another trying to strike her from behind, she combined the ends of her daggers and twisted, causing the other to jut out and pierce the chest of other soldier trying to sneak up on her.

"Take them out from above! I have an idea!" Mando called out to her, after taking a split second to admire her Stormtrooper shish kebab.

"Cover me!" Aurelia separated the blades and slid them back alongside her waist, then fired her grappling hook into the edge of the stone rooftop belonging to the common room they sought shelter in. She grappled upwards, both Mando and Karga taking out those who tried to shoot her down in the process. When she made it to the top and took cover behind some of the stone on the rooftop, she pulled her rifle from behind her back. From her peripheral vision, she saw Mando make a break for the E-Web cannon stationed untouched in the center of all the chaos. It was then she understood what he wanted her to do. She took out the nearby Troopers who swarmed around the cannon and stood in Mando's way. He dodged their shots in an attempt to stop him from using their detrimental weapon to his own advantage, thanking the stars his armor was able to safely deflect what rounds he couldn't avoid. Karga and Aurelia provided enough support for him to reach the massive heavy repeating blaster. Her feeling of victory watching the Mandalorian rain down on the Stormtroopers was short lived when two blaster rifle rounds grazed the side of her arms, causing her to fall back and yelp in pain at the sharp burning sensation that stretched along her marred skin. Mando shifted his focus to the Stormtrooper that took aim on his pilot, not paying attention to Moff Gideon who crept up from behind and fired a shot directly into his helmet. Aurelia scrambled to her crouched position, trying to avoid the situation from getting any worse. A few more Troopers blasted the corner of the roof she was taking cover behind, ceasing her aid towards her comrades down below. She tilted her head around the corner to watch helplessly as Mando stabilized himself enough to put Gideon in his line of fire next. The Imp prepared to take aim at the bounty hunter but his eyes shifted last minute to a large metallic box a foot away from where the Mandalorian stood.

"Mando! No!" Aurelia shouted from the rooftop above. Moff Gideon fired a single shot into the E-Web power unit, setting off a massive fireball explosion directly in front of the hunter. The force from the blast was enough to knock the sturdy Mandalorian clean off his feet and fling the cannon out of his hands. Both weapon and wielder landed on the ground with a loud, sickening clang. Karga dragged himself up the wall he had been thrust face first into from the resonating force of the explosion. He turned and fired at the incoming wave of Troopers who managed to survive Mando's onslaught, providing cover for Cara when she emerged from inside the common house to drag Mando's limp body inside. Aurelia dropped down beside them and used her grappling hooks to wrap around Mando's arms to help pull him to safety faster. She detached herself from him when they were inside behind the cover of the bar, Cara busy triaging the downed bounty hunter while Karga and Aurelia continued to take down what Troopers they could from the view of the window. IG had taken it upon itself to laser around the edges of the sewer grate, giving the group one last chance at escaping.

"Mando, I need to take this off," Cara pleaded. She reached up to rest her hands on both sides of his helmet, pausing and letting out a sharp gasp when her fingers met the slickness of his blood that had begun to slowly drip from out underneath his armor. She opened her mouth to speak but struggled to get anything to come out. She cleared her throat and tried to hide the way her voice was on the verge of breaking. "A-Aurelia!"

Aurelia's shattered heart further crumbled at the unmistakable sense of helplessness in Cara's tone. No, absolutely not. She wasn't going through this again. She hung her rifle back on the strap crossing over her chest and ran to wounded the Mandalorian, paying no attention to the rubble and broken bits of glass embedding themselves in her knees when she slid across the floor to his side. Mando gingerly placed his hands over hers, stopping her in her tracks when she placed her palms on the sides of his helmet.

"You have to make sure The Child is safe." He said weakly.

"Mando, no," she began to beg. "We're not going to leave you here. Please, please don't do this to me. Don't make me go through this twice in one day. We have to take this off, right Cara? Then we can help you."

"Please," he pleaded softly. "Just...just listen to me for once. You of all people should kn-know the importance of hiding yourself-"

Aurelia angrily yanked her hands free out from under his. She grabbed the black fabric twirled around her face and neck, ripping it off and throwing it across his chest.

"I hate it when you throw that shit in my face," she said venomously.

The beaten down Mandalorian couldn't come up with a well thought out response. He was too busy scanning over every inch of her face, his heart heavy that she revealed herself for him out of a defiant act of desperation. Maker, she was about to hate him forever.

Mando pulled off his necklace and placed it into the hand of the beautifully flawed woman crouched over him. "When you get to the Mandalorian covert, you show them that." She started to protest but he cut her off completely. "You tell them it's from Din...Djarin. You tell them the foundling was in my protection, and they'll help you."

He closed his eyes tight, praying desperately hard to the Maker and all the stars in the galaxy that he could somehow drown out her screams. "I'm not gonna make it, mesh'la, " he whispered, "and you know it."

Another fiery explosion blasted through the window. He kept talking over all the noise, raising his voice as much as his body would allow. "You protect The Child. I can hold them back long enough for you to escape. Let me have a warrior's death."

"MANDO!"

He paused for a minute, trying to push away the heaviness that weighed his weakened body down. The IG unit kicked in the vent grate just as a cluster of Stormtroopers rushed in. The Child crept forth, holding off the burning flames erupting from an enemy flame thrower. The foundling pushed the Troopers back through the doorway, giving everyone just enough time to flee. The droid scooped up the now exhausted child, shoving him into Aurelia's hands to distract her from the Mandalorian she was leaving behind. She was silent, tearfully looking over at the broken bounty hunter as she clutched his son tight.

"This is the Way," Mando reassured her.

"Come on! It's open, let's go!" Karga motioned for Cara and the others to follow him into the sewers. "We have to move. Now!"

"Go," Mando gasped one last time.

"Escape and protect this child," IG commanded to Aurelia. "I will stay with the Mandalorian."

"Promise me you'll bring him," Cara muttered just so the droid would hear.

"You have my word."

She stared hard at the droid and took off, wrapping an arm around Aurelia to get the stunned Kage woman to advance into the tunnels. "He's going to be fine," Cara tried to convince both herself and the pilot.

The trio continued through the vent until they reached what appeared to be the sewer system the Mandalorian was referring to. A few tunnels branched off from the starting point they had been led to, causing more of a headache rather than any relief that they might of finally been safe. They kept walking down the main walkway to see where it would take them rather than get themselves lost in any of the numerous corridors.

"Aurelia, isn't it?" Karga asked suddenly, eliciting a raised eyebrow in response from the younger woman. "That's your name?"

"Karga..." Cara warned in a low tone.

"What? We were never properly introduced."

"You decide to bring this up now?" The dropper snapped.

"Yes, it is," the raven haired woman answered before the bickering could continue. The hoarseness in her throat was still painstakingly evident from the tears she shed minutes ago.

"Well...I'm sorry for your losses today, Aurelia," he sympathized wholeheartedly.

"Karga!"

"What?!"

"Shhh! Do you hear that?" Aurelia silenced them. They listened closely, the sounds of approaching footsteps becoming more apparent.

The glow belonging to a bight head light bobbed down the sewer walkway several feet behind them. Looking past the white glow, they could make out the familiar looking beskar helmet the flashlight was fixed to. Aurelia's stomach flipped when she saw the weakened silhouette of Mando staggering towards them, barely being held up properly by IG's lanky robotic form. Both Karga and Cara let out heavy sighs of relief and rushed to Mando's side, happy that the droid managed to keep its promise.

"I got him, IG, thank you," Cara told the droid, taking on the weight of the Mandalorian.

"Of course. It is my duty to serve and protect. And Miss Aurelia, I believe this is yours." The IG unit turned to face her once its arms were free. It stiffly extended one claw outwards, releasing its grasp on the scarf she wore but left behind with then the dying bounty hunter. "Do with it as you wish. From my perspective, I do not believe you should be wearing it at all."

"Thank you," she told it somberly. Cara glanced nervously at Mando who was too focused on watching Aurelia secure the black cloth in its usual position. He had noticed that she said nothing to him since the droid brought him back to the others. Honestly, he wasn't sure what kind of reaction his reappearance would elicit from her. He was relieved to see everyone again, even Karga at this point. They still weren't out of danger yet and had to keep a level head in order to get to safety. Why then, was his heart heavier than the beskar he wore when his pilot completely ignored him?

"Do you know which way to go?" Karga asked, trying to redirect everyone's attention to the task at hand.

Mando tried to shake his head but the sudden wave of dizziness stopped him from doing so. "No. I don't know these tunnels. I've only entered from the bazaar. The Imps will catch us before we make it to the ship. We need to find the  Mandalorians so they can escort us to safety."

They wandered aimlessly around the various tunnels, their lack of progress of advancing forwards having themselves wondering if they were backtracking periodically and going in circles.

"This place is a maze," Cara groaned in frustration. She had seen the same rock multiple times now, she knew she had.

Mando rolled his shoulders and shifted his weight back and forth. He had several injuries he sustained from the explosion hadn't been tended to by the IG unit; he could feel patches of dried blood on various parts of his chest, arms, and legs sticking to the inside of flight suit. His head was ringing significantly less and his vertigo had subsided considerably, but no amount of bacta the droid had on him could make the dull, aching, throb that was still present, go away completely. He wouldn't be able to sit down and recover until after the mission was completed entirely, but he was getting fed up with having to be dragged along like a giant burden. "Stop," he told Cara, pulling some of his weight off her and to his own two feet. "I can stand. I have to do something. I'll...I'll try to find tracks that will lead us to the others."

He stumbled around for a minute trying to steady himself, his head tilted low towards the ground and scanning over his surroundings slowly under the tracking settings of his visor. A set of footsteps not belonging to anyone else in the group caught his attention. They ventured further down the tunnels and around one of the corners, possibly leading them to the rest of his covert. Mando motioned for his companions to follow him, his heart beating faster through his armor when the heat signatures became more prominent and fresh looking, signifying that they were closing in on whoever left them behind.

"We're close. Turn here."

The sight that befell the Mandalorian's eyes was enough to make his newly regained strength be sucked completely out from him.

"Oh no," Cara grimaced under her breath once the realization dawned on her as to what exactly they were seeing. In the middle of the walkway lay a pile of worn Mandalorian armor, mostly consisting of forsaken helmets that were apparently left behind by the others. A few busted up pauldrons, thigh coverings, and chest plates were scattered about the ground as well, but to remove one's helmet, according to the Mandalorian creed, meant there was no going back to one's old way. Deserting the armor that was held to such high regards by its wearer meant that Mando's covert had given up their entire way of life.

The lone Mandalorian dropped to his knees in anguish in front of the collection of beskar and metal. Even though almost every square inch of his body was covered, the obscene amount of pain, anger, and confusion he was feeling was still apparent to everyone.

"Mando?" Aurelia spoke up timidly. She still had her strong opinions about how she felt towards him when he had her ripped away from his side as he lay dying, but as hurt as she was, she still couldn't find it in herself to not console her partner.

She approached him slowly, noticing how tense his broad shoulders were, how low he hung his head, and how stiff all the muscles in his arms were. In the few months she had spent with the Mandalorian, she had to learn both his subtle and very obvious changes in his body language to understand what he was feeling at any given time. He was good at masking most emotions in his voice, especially thanks to the vocoder embedded in his helmet, although his occasional frustrated sighs and tones of annoyance still slipped past the beskar from time to time. When his stance was rigid and statuesque, she knew better than to push his buttons or come at him too quickly. The way he looked to her now, well, confronting him would be like poking an angry rancor with a stick. Still, she couldn't bring herself not to try.

"Mando?" Aurelia repeated once more, this time a bit more assertively. He paid her no mind, even when she stood directly over his huddled form. It was only when the tips of her slender fingers brushed against the cape secured around his neck, did he flinch sharply at her touch and stare up at her.

Since IG brought him back to the others, she hadn't once looked his way. He knew he had upset her and caused her emotional grief for practically nothing. She wouldn't outright admit it, but she was far from okay after the passing of Kuiil. The moisture farmer was like a second father figure to her. He was undoubtedly the most important person in her life. Mando wasn't sure how she felt about himself personally, but he safety assumed they had a good friendship developing. She was still timid at times, but they still trusted one another for the most part. Mando knew he crushed what relationship was developing between them the second he had Cara rip her away from his side. He obliterated their trust into millions of pieces of stardust. The pain he felt from seeing the abandoned armor of his people, only deepened when he looked up at Aurelia. He was grateful she had finally acknowledged him, but he felt so unworthy of the concern and honey glow of warmth she had in her deep golden eyes. The fact that she touched him sent his emotions into overdrive. He had no problem touching her when the moment called for it. He made physical contact with a lot of people, though a lot of it wasn't necessarily friendly. It was receiving, though, that he was far from used to. The first time she initiated true physical contact, was when she would clean his wounds. It was a little strange and unfamiliar at first but he didn't mind it. He deemed it viable and there was no meaning behind her touch. This most recent time, however, when he felt her fingertips leave nervous, feather light tracings across his scarred bronze skin, was something new to him. He wouldn't dare tell her that he could still feel her hands ghosting over his back for hours after he put his clothing back on. The gentle feeling of her hand she placed near the base of his neck just now, only reminded him of that surprisingly intimate moment they shared.

Cara cleared her throat to remind the others that despite the unfortunate circumstances at hand, time was of the essence. "We should go," she tried to persuade the rest of the group.

"You go," Mando said monotonously. "Take the ship. I can't leave it this way."

His attention suddenly honed in strictly on Karga. He shot up to his knees, Aurelia stumbling backwards from surprise at his sudden movement.

"Did you know about this?" Mando asked threateningly, swooping in on the Guild leader. "Is this the work of your bounty hunters?"

"What? No!" he cried out. His eyes frantically darted between Cara, Aurelia, and the IG unit watching helplessly on the sidelines. No way were they getting in the middle of the Mandalorian's meltdown. "When you left the system and took the prize, the fighting ended and the hunters just...melted away. You know how it is. They're mercenaries. They're not zealots."

His answer did nothing to settle Mando's dangerous outburst. Aurelia felt herself shrink to the side the more Mando's fury unleashed itself. Never had she seen the stone cold, stoic man show his emotions on his scale.

"Did you do this?" The bounty hunter roared. His deep baritone echoed off the sewer walls, not giving a damn if it brought the Stormtroopers their way. He butted chests with Karga in a primal display of aggression when the man gave him no answer. "Did you?!"

"No!" Karga all but begged for mercy.

"It was not his fault," an unfamiliar female voice rang out behind him. The sound immediately calmed the rabid Mandalorian, his anger doused by her assertive but velvety smooth tone. "We revealed ourselves. We knew what could happen if we left the covert."

She tossed a few of the forgotten pieces of armor onto a cart. Pushing the pile she had collected, she led the travelers towards a large circular room. In the center, appeared to be an old, outdated forge.

"The Imperials arrived shortly thereafter. This is what resulted," she gestured to the strewn out armor.

"Did any survive?" Mando asked hesitantly.

"I hope so. Some may have escaped off-world."

Mando's eyes scanned over the pile of armor knowing it was only him and the Armorer left in the covert. "Come with us."

"No," she rejected firmly. "I will not abandon this place until I have salvaged what remains."

The Armorer tossed a few more pauldrons into the furnace's blue flames. Aurelia watched how easily the seemingly indestructible beskar caved in itself from the burning hot touch of the flames. It bubbled and melted, pooling into the familiar shining silver she knew so well. It was funny how much the properties of the steel armor he wore resembled the Mandalorian himself. Beskar was valuable and very sought after by many. It never chipped, rusted, or blemished despite all who tried to harm it. It was flawless, shining bright and forever polished to perfection. Yet, with one touch of a simple flame, the one thing it was susceptible to, it was reduced to a puddle of gleaming metal. That's all it was after all: just steel.

"Show me the one whose safety deemed such destruction," the Armorer's voice commanded.

She walked up to Aurelia, eyeing her silently under the solid black glass visor of her golden Mandalorian helmet. "Is this the one? I sense much fight in her, but yet, much turmoil."

"This is the one," Mando gestured to the infant in her arms.

The Armorer averted her gaze down some, her helmet tilting in amusement at an infant being the sought after person of interest. "This is the one you hunted, then saved?"

"Yes. The one that saved me as well."

"From the mudhorn?"

"Yes."

She paused for a moment, eyes glancing over the worn out, unconscious child. "It looks helpless."

"It's injured, but it is not helpless. Its species can move objects with its mind."

"I know of such things. The songs of eons past tell of battles between Mandalore the Great and an order of sorcerers called Jedi that fought with such powers."

Mando felt uneasy, almost too afraid to ask her to elaborate. "It is an enemy?"

"No. Its kind were enemies, but this individual is not."

The sudden pit in his stomach disappeared. He kept his sigh of relief strictly to himself. "What is it?" Mando asked.

"It is a foundling. By Creed, it is in your care."

"You wish me to train this thing?"

The Armorer shook her head. She turned her attention back to the molten beskar she had melted down in the furnace. "It is too weak; it would die. You have no choice but to reunite it with its own kind."

"You expect me to search the galaxy for the home of this creature and deliver it to a race of enemy sorcerers?" Mando felt stupid for allowing such a sentence to pass his lips. It sounded absurd, all of it. A baby with magical powers who's species just so happens to be enemies with the Mandalorians? It was a crazy, cruel twist of fate. The whole galaxy seemed to be out to get him at this point.

"This is the Way," the Armorer said casually. Aurelia was beginning to hate that saying. It seemed like an overly formal way of saying, "fuck it, that's how things are, so deal with it". She respected it because it was important to Mando. Those simple words were the foundation for his whole lifestyle. He was obviously willing to die over it, and she felt guilty that every single part of her hated that he was okay with that. They hid themselves for different reasons, but when Kuiil told her that Mando out of everyone else in the entire galaxy, should know how important it was for her to reveal herself to him, he didn't even bat an eye. It made her feel so foolish for trusting in him, but it made her even angrier with herself for being so upset about it. She hid because she was ashamed, he hid because it was his way of life. How dare she get upset over that, right? She was nothing in comparison to the importance of his creed. After all, he was willing to leave The Child, his friends, and even her over it.

No.

No, she wasn't going to dwell on it. She needed to stop this. He hired her for a job, plain and simple. Mando was nothing to her, and she was nothing to him. It's what she told everyone else, and it's what she would keep reminding herself every second if she had to because this was her way. If he was so willing to sever ties with people he "cared" about, she wouldn't give him the satisfaction of begging him to come back or feeling upset when he decided to leave.

Cara nudged her out of her runaway train of thought. "Aurelia, we need to go," she muttered to raven haired woman before turning to address the rest of the group. "These tunnels will be lousy with Imps in a matter of minutes. We should at least discuss an escape plan."

"If you follow the descending tunnel it will lead you to the underground river. It flows downstream toward the lava flats," the Armorer directed them.

Mando stayed put. "I'm staying. I need to help her, and I need to heal." There he was again, doing as he pleased. It was his job to come and go as he saw fit, not stay with someone for too long. Aurelia felt foolish for thinking she might of even been an exception.

"You must go," the Armorer commanded sternly. She turned her back towards the rest of the group and motioned for the Mandalorian to follow her to the edge of the furnace. "A foundling is in your care. By Creed, until it is of age or reunited with its own kind, you are as its father. This is the Way. You have earned your Signet."

The Armorer reached back towards the furnace to collect the newest work of craftsmanship she made using the beskar from the other Mandalorian armor. Sparks flew from Mando's pauldron as his signet was fastened to the steel. The Armorer stepped back to reveal her handiwork; the silhouette of a mudhorn.

"You are a clan of two," she nodded towards Mando and The Child.

"Thank you. I will wear this with honor."

A few loud explosions detonating nearby startled the group. The yells of Imperial soldiers could faintly be heard off in the distance, signaling that the tunnels were soon to be overrun with enemy forces.

"IG, please guard the outer hallway. A scouting party draws near," the Armorer requested. "I have one more gift for your journey. Have you trained in the Rising Phoenix?"

Mando looked at her with awe under his helmet. "When I was a boy, yes."

"Then this," she began, reaching behind her to grab a jetpack, "will make you complete."

Mando took the heavy device from her hands, a strong sense of pride stirring in his chest at the sight of being awarded with such an honor. "Thank you," he exhaled breathlessly.

The other Mandalorian eyed him carefully. "When you have healed, you will begin your drills. Until you know it, it will not listen to your commands.

"I understand."

A few grunts and the chaotic sounds of blasters firing out in the corridor followed. It was quiet for a moment, then IG rounded the corner stoically.

"You are protected," he told the others.

The Armorer nodded in response then turned to face Mando. "More will come. You must go."

"Come with us," he tried to bargain once more.

"My place is here," she answered undeterred by his persuasive efforts. "Restock your munitions. IG, carry this jetpack for Din Djarin until he is well enough to wear it. Now, go! Down to the river and across the plains. Be safe on your journey."

___________________________________________

They approached an underground lava river, the sweltering sulfuric air making it difficult to breathe in the enclosed tunnel. A few rodents that blended in with the charred rocky landscape scuttled past their feet in a hurry. Aurelia followed their movements, her eyes catching what appeared to be a ferry at the base of the ledge they were standing on. The poor droid that had been given the unfortunate task of operating the boat, didn't appear to be functional in the blistering environmental conditions. In fact, it appeared the ferry hadn't been operated for quite some time. Dried chunks of cooled magma stick to the edges of the boat, securing it to the wall it floated up against it. Mando tried unsuccessfully to pry the rocks loose with the droid's oar, his lack of success further adding to his growing frustration.

"You guys mind getting out of the way?" Cara pushed past him. She took aim at the edge of the boat, blasting away at the hardened rock. Everyone piled on the ferry in a hurry when it began to sway on the surface of the lava, finally freed from the ledge. The sudden movement of the boat making its way downstream brought the tall ferry guide droid to life. Still on edge, the group aimed their blasters defensively at the poor thing simply trying to do its job. It made a few beeps and whistles, translated by IG as it wanting to know where to take the travelers.

"Down river, to the lava flat," Karga instructed. The droid beeped in acknowledgement, humming a happy, high pitched tune to itself as it steered mindlessly through the scorching river. Had their lives not been at stake by the countless Troopers hunting them down, it would've almost almost a peaceful, and much needed, relaxing moment for everyone. Aurelia and Cara leaned back against the edge of the raft, happy to be able to rest for just a moment while they had time to. The orange glow radiating from the lava stream bounced off nearby rocks, creating a  mesmerizing sight during the slow trip down river. The warm blanket of heat lingering in the air along with the droid's singing made Aurelia's eyes heavier the longer they floated on. As if on que, Karga directed everyone's attention to the bright white glow at the end of the tunnel.

"That's it. We're free!"

Something didn't sit right with Mando; this was far too easy of an escape. He stared down the remainder of the tunnel through his life form scanner of his helmet, picking up on multiple heat signatures clustered around both sides of the exit.

"No, we're not," he warned. "Stormtroopers. They're flanking the mouth of the tunnel. It looks like an entire platoon. They must know we're coming."

"What do we do now?" Aurelia asked. "I mean, I could try to grapple past them, maybe get their attention-"

"Absolutely not." Mando growled.

"That's not really your call to make, is it?" She fired at the bounty hunter.

"It's suicide. I'm not letting you do something that stupid, especially after Kuiil gave me the task of looking out for you."

"Don't you dare bring him into this," she spat venomously, jamming a finger into his chest plate. "And I'm not another job for you to do, Mandalorian."

The sound of a blaster going off turned their attention to a smoking, headless ferry droid. Cara holstered her weapon, the others looking at her in confusion. "He wouldn't stop the boat," she said her defense.

Karga threw up his hands in exasperation. "Well we're still moving!"

"There are too many to fight," Mando insisted, still not tearing his eyes away from his heated crew member.

The IG unit stepped forward. "They will not be satisfied with anything less than The Child. This is unacceptable. I will eliminate the enemy, and you will escape."

"You don't have that kind of firepower, pal," Mando countered looking the droid's way. "You wouldn't even get to daylight."

"That is not my objective. I still have the security protocols from my manufacturer. If my designs are compromised, I must self-destruct."

"What are you talking about?" Mando asked, even though from his first initial run in with the bounty droid, he knew exactly what protocol IG was referring to. It had threatened to use it on numerous occasions when it seemed as though both Mandalorian and droid were heavily outnumbered by enemies during the initial search and rescue mission for The Child.

"I'm not permitted to be captured. I must be destroyed," IG clarified. "I can no longer carry this for you," it said setting the jetpack down at its feet, "nor can I watch over The Child. Miss Aurelia, it is your responsibility to do so for the remainder of the mission."

"Wait. You can't self-destruct," Mando tried to reason. "Your base command is to watch The Child. That supersedes your manufacturer's protocol, right?"

IG paused thoughtfully for a moment. "This is correct."

"Good. Now grab a blaster and help us shoot our way out."

"Victory through combat is impossible. We will be captured. The Child will be lost. Sadly, there is no scenario where both The Child and Miss Aurelia remain safe, in which I survive. We both have fulfillments that we must see through. Just how you wanted to sacrifice yourself for the safety of your friends, I must do the same."

That hit Mando. Hard. He didn't want to die. This wasn't some kamikaze mission where he didn't care what happened to him. The IG unit had a choice in the matter and it needed to understand self-sacrifice wasn't the only way.

"Listen, you're not going anywhere," Mando pleaded, trying hard to hide the desperation in his voice. "We need you. Let's just come with a-"

"Please tell me the child will be safe in your care," IG interrupted. "If you do so, I can default to my secondary command."

"But you'll be destroyed," the Mandalorian's voice wavered.

"And you will live, and I will have served my purpose."

"No, we need you." Mando was thankful his helmet hid his pained expression beneath the layers of tinted glass and beskar.

"There is nothing to be sad about. I have never been alive," IG said indifferently.

"I'm not...sad."

"Yes you are. I'm a nurse droid. I've analyzed your voice."

The rest of the group watched in defeat as IG gently ran the back of its clawed hand over the top of The Child's head. The last bit of human-like affection it showed made it impossible for Aurelia to watch the droid step into flowing river of lava. The way the IG unit was more human than it would care to admit only further reminded her of the Mandalorian; she didn't think either one was fully okay with dying, even if they said otherwise.

The selfless droid marched onwards until it reached the mouth of the tunnel. A bit of movement could be seen around the edges around the rocks. They could see the fidgeting of shadows coming from the Stormtroopers that were gathered along the exit, watching carefully as to what the droid's next move would be. All was still for a moment before an explosion was set off at the exit, causing Aurelia to jump at the sudden violent detonation. There were no screams or cries of pain from the Troopers; just the eerie silence that was occasionally interrupted by the sound of tiny crackling flames and settling debris that remained in the wake of IG's blast.

The boat continued to drift towards through the large dust cloud, everyone raising their weapons in case any survivors had somehow made it out unscathed. There was no sign of life whatsoever at the end of the tunnel.

Their moment of victory and relief, however, was short lived. A TIE fighter swooped in from overhead, heading straight towards the boat. Cara immediately recognized it as the one that had been right outside the common house when the Troopers had ambushed them during their meeting with the client.

"It's Moff Gideon," she spat hatefully.

When the TIE fighter honed in on their position, they knew he was getting ready to strike. Immediately when they darted out of the small boat, Moff Gideon rained down a barrage of blaster cannon fire, sending spewing chunks of hot lava, rock, and wooden debris in every direction. Mando ushered the rest of the group behind a small gathering of rocks in a desperate attempt to take some kind of cover knowing they wouldn't be so lucky the during the next aerial strike.

"What are you doing?!" Cara exclaimed, turning Karga and Aurelia's attention from the incoming TIE fighter to the Mandalorian.

"I have an idea, just...stay here and take cover," he told her. Mando secured the jetpack that was bestowed upon him by the Armorer on his back. He grit his teeth under the new weight of heavy beskar that was added to his exhausted muscles. He only had one shot at this, and even he had to admit it wasn't his most well thought out plan. The safety of The Child was his top priority. That, and Aurelia's too. He glanced down at the smaller woman and noticed the hint of worry in her golden stare. Mando cupped the side of her face carefully, his heart faltering when he saw the way she fought with herself about whether or not to pull away from his touch. Pushing his own emotions to the back of his mind, he had to remind himself of the task at hand.

He didn't say anything else but instead fired up the Rising Phoenix. The sudden jolt upwards elicited a few painful grunts from the bounty hunter due to his head whipping around from the intense force of the jetpack. Mando struggled to maneuver himself properly but eventually managed to follow the path of the TIE fighter and give pursuit to an unsuspecting Moff Gideon. He shot himself forward a bit more and latched onto the top of the starfighter. From the ground, the others couldn't do anything but helplessly watch the tense scene of Mando being bucked around by Gideon. The TIE fighter weaved in and out of the thick covering of clouds, causing them to lose sight of the Mandalorian for a few passing moments. Karga nudged the two others when a bright, metallic shimmer caught his eye; Mando was falling back to the surface of Nevarro. A loud explosion permeated through the atmosphere, ripping their focus on the bounty hunter to the giant fireball that erupted above him. The TIE fighter disintegrated in a massive explosion, large portions of the ship splitting off and crashing hard into the landscape around them.

Mando recovered himself before he got too close to the ground, making a shaky landing next to the mouth of the tunnel they came out of.

Karga let out a boisterous laugh upon approaching the bounty hunter. "That was impressive, Mando," the Guild leader cheered. "Very impressive. It looks like your Guild rates have just gone up."

"Any more Stormtroopers?" Mando asked, completely unfazed by his one on one fight with a TIE fighter.

Cara shook her head. "I think we cleaned up the town. I'm thinking of staying around just to be sure."

"You're staying here?" He asked in slight disbelief.

"Well, why not?" Karga frowned. "Nevarro is a very fine planet. And now that the scum and villainy have been washed away, it's very respectable again.

Karga grinned and let out a soft chuckle. "Some of my favorite people are bounty hunters." He motioned to Cara. "Perhaps, this specimen of soldier might consider joining our ranks."

The dropper looked over the landscape thoughtfully. "Yeah, I've got some clerical concerns regarding my chain code."

"If you would agree to become my enforcer, clerical concerns would be the least of your worries. But you, my friend," Karga said sharing a finger at Mando, "you will be welcome back into the Guild with open arms. So, go off, enjoy yourself. And when you're ready to return, you will have the pick of all quarries."

The Mandalorian tilted his helmet towards the little foundling that clung tightly to his leg. He let out a sigh then reached down to scoop up the infant. "I'm afraid I have more pressing matters at hand."

Cara approached the father and son pair. She smiled down at the mischievous child, stroking one of it long ears in between her fingertips lovingly while it cooed. "Take care of this little one, and Aurelia too."

Karga placed a hand on the pilot's shoulder, his eyes looking into hers bidding her a silent goodbye. "Or maybe...they'll take care of you."

Mando passed The Child to Aurelia, a sigh of relief threatening to pass his lips when he saw the warmth return to her eyes at the sight of the infant so happy to see her. Such a feeling was short lived when Mando interrupted the sweet moment between the pair.

"Hold the kid tight," he instructed. He scooped her up, holding her tight against his chest and praying to the Maker that he would be able to control the Phoenix enough just to make it back to the ship in one piece.

The Child babbled excitedly, its mouth wide open and a few giggles escaping when they took off and flew high above the lava flats. Even Aurelia couldn't contain the corners of her smile that peeked out from underneath her scarf and the excitement that danced in her golden orbs.

___________________________________________

Mando felt her tense up in her arms when they descended upon the Razor Crest. She was happy to see the ship again, but what lay unmoving just a few feet from the entrance ramp made even Mando's heart drop.

He watched the way she tried to hide the way her legs wanted to buckle underneath her the closer she got to Kuiil's body laying at the base of the Crest. Her body finally gave out when she closed in on the last bit of space between her and the Ugnaught. The exposed fingertips of her gloved hands traced over the bottom of the scarf around her neck. She pulled it loose and down around her shoulders, the ends of the long fabric brushing up against the dry, cracked ground.

Neither she nor Mando said a word to each other while she carefully wrapped the moisture farmer up in the long strand of thick, black cloth. Mando pried his eyes from her and tried think of what he could could use to dig a small grave with and give him a proper burial.

Kuiil was the first person to show Aurelia kindness and expected nothing in return after so many years of being exposed to nothing but sadistic hatred and manipulation every single day. To die at the hands of the Empire was a cruel twist of faith that she would never be able to let herself live down. Kuill worked so hard for his freedom, in fact, he prided himself in it. His selflessness got him killed by the same people that tried to break his kind, generous spirit.

Mando laid Kuiil down gently in the bottom of the grave he had dug out near the Crest. Aurelia held tightly onto The Child who let out a few whimpers and sniffles. Though it might not of fully understood the magnitude of the situation of Kuiil's self-sacrifice, the little foundling could easily feel the sadness coming from both of his caretakers. Knowing they were hurting so made The Child feel similarly.

"Mahn valle ehin uhl Sahsahlah. Aanor il lofahchu ishiia zals. Doaba ol'val tru, min dul'skal," Aurelia spoke quietly over the Mandalorian tossing the rich volcanic dirt over her fallen friend.

Mando turned to look at her but before she allowed him any time to take in her appearance once more, she turned and headed up the ramp into the Razor Crest. He took the moment of solitude to pay his respects to Kuiil one last time, silently thanking him for his sacrifice and for putting the safety of The Child before himself.

His stomach twisted into knots when he climbed up the ladder and saw Aurelia sitting in the centermost chair starting straight ahead outside the cockpit, one of her spare long scarves tied extra securely around her neck and face.

"Where to?" Was all she said, not even bothering to turn and look back at the man staring her down.

"That was beautiful, what you said," Mando remarked in regards to her parting words to Kuiil. "I don't recognize the language, but it sounded beauti-"

"Old Corellian," Aurelia said bluntly. "It's not spoken anymore by much of anyone. My mother picked it up during her years meeting traders who passed through her cantina. She taught it to my father, and he and his soldiers used it during their missions for the sake of secrecy. Now tell me, Mando, where are we going?"

He was blindsided by the harshness of her answer. It took him a second to gather this thoughts and give her a proper plan. Truthfully, he hadn't even thought of what their next destination would be. Mando knew he wanted to take it easy for a few weeks at the very least. He needed to recuperate, as did Aurelia after the physical but more so emotional toll their visit to Nevarro had taken on her. Obviously, she wasn't in the same frame of mind she had been in since before today. She was cold, distant, and more closed off than ever before. Mando wasn't an idiot; he knew Kuill's death had a large role to play in her behavior. He couldn't be upset with her for that and he knew she needed time to grieve as did he, in his own way. He knew the straw that broke the dewback's back had to have been him almost dying on top of the loss of the Ugnaught. What he didn't understand though, was why she didn't even seem to care that he was fine after all.

"Dantooine," he spoke up when the name of the planet was the first to pop into his mind. "It's quiet. We'll lay low for a while and regroup there."

Aurelia locked herself in the refresher once the navigation had been set and she, much to her annoyance, manually determined the calculations for hyperspace. She was hoping the fact that the IG unit had ended up on the  Mandalorian's good side would provide any leverage she needed to convince him into getting an astromech droid in the distant future.

Stars, the future? She had never really thought about such a thing with Mando before. They kind of just...took one day at a time. How long was this going to go on for? They knew now there was some kind of "deadline" coming up as far as how long she would need to stick around. Now that they were actively trying to rehome the kid, well, there wouldn't be any use for her anymore once that was over. They could find these "Jedi" tomorrow, a week, or even a year from now. Absolutely nothing was certain about what was to come. Even then, how long would she be able to tolerate the complete state of emotional disarray she was in?

Aurelia turned on the water to as hot as it would allow. She let down her knotted, dirt and volcanic ash covered tresses and slowly removed each layer of clothing. She winced at how sore her fatigued muscles were from the battle on Nevarro. Her legs were tired from the constant walking and fleeing they did all day, and the burn marks from the Stormtrooper's blaster that grazed her were still raw and irritated.

A thick cloud of steam had begun to collect in the cramped washroom but she didn't mind. The overly hot shower was the only thing that felt good to her right now. She let the burning cascade of fiery water droplets wash away the dried blood and dirt off her skin. It didn't take long for her to clean herself, but she didn't want to venture out to the rest of the Crest quite yet. She was enjoying her moment of quiet, especially away from the Mandalorian. Unbeknownst to her, something caught his attention when he finished tucking The Child into the swing that hung above his cot. He felt wrong for doing so, but he brought his helmet to the refresher door when he heard Aurelia stirring inside. He wasn't expecting to hear her muffled sobs over the sound of the running shower.

Tags: @geannad

[typhoontroubadour]

How do you guys like your tea

Some notes about the placements can be found under the cut.

Those Dead Peeps: Don’t know anything about so I can’t make a real judgement on any of them.

Fuck You Guys: Self explanatory.

Mishima: Mishima gets a lower tier than everyone else cuz he was the first to die so we spent the least amount of time with him, and despite the fact he keeps coming back in some way or another I still can’t make myself care about him THAT much. That being said, I haven’t yet played island mode where he’s the only player character so that might sway my judgement later.

Ranger: While a bastard he’s a very entertaining bastard. That alone I think warrants him above the Fuck You tier. And also, while I still hold him accountable, his dad was the dick who left him without positive emotions and led to him taking the actions he does.

Safalin: I was thinking about putting her a tier above where she is but I don’t think she deserves to be on the same tier as the charcaters above her. She’d likely need her own middle ground tier as my fave doll.

Sara: Probably the first real eyebrow raiser. Sara while being a good and expressive character I feel is one of the most generic and average out of the group so far. Note that I said so far. She’s steadily become more complex as the story unfolds. I hope by the end and we find out what her deal is that the orginization wants her so badly I can bump her up at least one more ranking. To compare the series to Danganronpa (something no one has ever done before) in terms of protagonist level, she’s kinda like Makoto to me. There’s nothing wrong with her, but I just feel the future protags are more complex, in due no small part from being able to learn from writing for the first game onwards.

Reko; Alright, listen. I like Reko. I think she’s a good character. But compared to Sara and even her brother? (congrats to the trans fans for being fed that good shit btw) I just feel rather lukewarm about her. Reko and Alice are kinda comparable as rather abrasive characters with a softer side to them. I always can appreciate a character who can he tough but care for or look after the weaker ones. But at the same time that character alone can only get so far in my eyes. I think she’s missing some crucial piece of charcater to her to really make her stand out as her own. Something truly unique about her to let her stand on her own two feet. Until that day comes, I just see Reko as that cool big sister who got me through the dancing sub game.

Q-taro: This one’s pretty simple, I feel like I want to like him more than I do but can’t. I honestly thought he’d be dead by the end of chapter 2 when playing through it. It kind of feels like we’ve seen the extent of his character already through where we are in the sotry. I also find his character to sometimes flipflop back and forth sometimes? Like how he goes from the first main game saying we can’t nominate the kids to not willing to take the stinger for Gin. He seems like he really cares about trust and believing in people (other than Shin) but then chapter 2 happens and he kinda loses it? I dunno, it’s reasonable for someone to crack, but for him, to me, it feels like there needed to be more of a build up of seeing him start to collapse a bit. And then his shady behavior kinda gets pushed aside cwhen he works with Keiji and the focus shifts away from him. Don’t some of you think he can come off as if changing his alliances when they’re convienant for him? Long story short, he just seems kind of like a mess to me that needs sorted out to make sense of at the moment.

Joe/Jou: However you prefer to spell it, I think we can all agree he is a very good boi. Not much to say that hasn’t already been said on him.

Alice: I rank him higher than his sister cuz I just think he’s a slighter better version of her character and more enjoyable to read. Kinda sad to see him go.

Kai: Kai was someone who if I ranked these guys simply on the stuff we knew about them from chapter 1 I’d likely put in the average tier, but thanks to chpater 2 he’s risen a rank. He’s a very fascinating character I hope continues to have some sort of presence in the final chapter. I kinda feel like he’s done now that we’ve cleaned out his laptop, but I can hope. He also gets props for smacking Miley upside the head.

Keiji: Do I even need to say anything? No? Didn’t think so.

Sou/Shin: Remember all I said about Q-taro? Yeah, I feel Shin is that but it actually makes sense and he’s just a real interesting charcater to see act and react to things. He is a great love to hate character for me. I’m very interested to see how he’s handled in chapter 3 as someone who chose to have him live the end of chapter 2.

As a quick break before moving on, to speak on the character we recently learned of, Shadow Sou, just Sou Hiyori, whatever, while we still don’t know anything of him, I think we can all put aside our differences to  want to jump this smelly bad man. I would take pleasure in seeing him hooked up to a punishment machine and having a bot set up to mash a button meant to prolong his suffering. That is all.

Gin: Let me be 100% clear right now. Everyone in this tier is here purely for being my fave. Do they deserve to be this high regardless? Your results may vary, but I believe so. I love Gin so much. He’s so good. He is the final alive member of the group who must be protected at all costs. I’m glad he’s found his own use to the group as the story went on. I didn’t know how to feel about him at the start of the game, Kind of like Kai I didn’t feel really attached to him. But the more I was able to be with him, the more the little guy grew on me. He is my adoptive little bro and I will visit him everyday and make sure to play with him. I really hope nothing bad happens to him in chapter 3, but I’m also so worried we’ll have more damage done to Sara’s mental fortitude before the end to try to breka her further. And I feel like that can only really come from losing Gin or Keiji at this point to sting as much as when Joe did.

Nao: Oh, Nao. My sweet baby. I think I should start this off by saying what I think all fans of Nao would like to sy to the game. How about you go fuck yourself? I’m serious, Nao gets shit on through the whole game leading to her end in chapter 2. What do you guys have against Nao? She’s great and I would’ve happily traded away her sacrifice card for my own. She’s so pure and trying to do her best and be a better person without realying so heavily on tohers like Mishima. But, I’d be an idiot to just ignore the fact she did kinda fulfill that before her end. You could easily argue she kinda already reached the end of her arc as a character. She finally reached that point the others that supported her thought she could be. Am I still sad to see her go? Of course I am. Do I find it a satisfactory end for her character? I say I’m glad she was at least able grow into herself before dropping her. And that’s you can really ask of a game like this.

Kanna: Last but not least we have dear, sweet, precious Kanna. It was rough choosing to vote against her at the end of chapter 2. That’s something I’ll have to see the consequences of on a repeat playthrough once the game is complete. I took her words to heart and let her protect Sara the only way she knew how. I hope she’s able to rest easy with her sister. I think Kanna, much like Gin, fit that good child charcater trait of being able to see the good in people depsite some things about them in that naively and pure way only a kid can. I like how depsite everything, she put her faith into Sara and Shin to the very end. If there’s one thig to respect about her character it’s that she stuck to her guns like Joe despite knowing her end was likely coming.

To anyone who read this whole thing top to bottom, or skipped around to the characters they cared about and made it down here to read about Kanna and noticed this last little spiel, you are the mvps, and I hope your faves make it out alive.

[waltrp]

NO, DON’T PUSH US AWAY, HIRO. WE’RE HERE FOR YOU

BIDDI BOPPI BOOP A SPECIAL MESSAGE ADMIN ZULEMA: jill my queen, i know how long you’ve wanted to take up this angel and i’m so happy to finally bestow her to you. your sample for haven was amazing. You know this character inside and out. the love and passion you have translated perfectly into your para and i’m so excited to see what you do with her !! also nag me to finish the cast so i can see cute big hero 6 interactions on the dash lmfao. Please refer to THIS PAGE for your next tasks. We can’t wait to roleplay with you. Welcome to our Ohana xx.

It’s a pleasure to meet you…

Jill, 30, eastern, she/her

My favorite color is purple

My favorite super hero is Kate Bishop/Hawkeye

I’ve seen Parks & Rec so many times I can “watch” the show with my eyes closed

No triggers

Are you positive you can be active?

yes indeed

How did you stumble upon Walt?

we go way back

Did you read the rules?

yup!

Are you sure?

Scuttle

Character you want?

Haven Lemos

Please describe the character for us

When Haven was born, her parents said they could have sworn they gave birth to the sun, so bright and cheerful their little one was. Growing up wasn’t easy for Haven—her family immigrated from Cuba to the United States when she was small. Haven doesn’t remember a life in Cuba, but she knows that everything her parents have done was to secure a better life for their children, and because of that Haven has always admired them.

Haven’s formative years were spent in Miami, Florida, which meant that even though she was away from Cuba, she was able to grow up immersed in her culture even outside of her own home. The older she grew, the more responsibilities fell to Haven, but she took every one of them in stride. With parents that were constantly working to make ends meet, Haven spent much of her free time taking care of her siblings. She may have grown up faster than most kids her age, but Haven never let that get to her. Her optimism and sunny disposition were constant. Haven worked as hard as her parents in every thing she did. She wanted to make them proud and wouldn’t take their sacrifices for granted. One day, Haven hoped to take care of them the way they took care of her.

As a child, most of her peers found her to be strange. Haven has always been quirky and unique, and to top it off she was smart and her favorite subject was science. Most of the other kids couldn’t quite relate—their favorite subject was recess, long after recess stopped being a thing. Haven became one of the top students in science for their school district, and graduated with AP courses in biology, physics, and chemistry (her favorite). To Haven, the logical next stop was the prestigious San Fransokyo Institute of Technology. She wanted to attend the school so desperately, but knew that with her family’s financial situation, it was only a dream. But with a push from her chemistry teacher, Haven’s dreams came true: admission and a full scholarship.

At SFIT, Haven truly came into her own. She was surrounded by students similar to herself, and lucky enough to spend every day learning more about the thing she absolutely loved. Chemistry came naturally to the girl, and it wasn’t long before she was conducting her own experiments, hoping to push the subject to new heights, beyond anything the world already knew. The only thing that made the experience better than she could ever imagine was the group of friends she almost suddenly found herself a part of. She couldn’t imagine how she had managed a life without the four of them. She even had a nickname among the group: Honey Lemon. (You’d have to ask Freddy why.)

It didn’t take long for the crush to develop. Tadashi Hamada was her friend and her equal. How could she not fall in love? The friendship blossomed into a full-on mutual flirtation after the two were paired up for a class project. She loved everyone in their group, but Tadashi easily moved from best friend to boyfriend. Not wanting to disrupt the group dynamic, the duo decided it would be best to keep their relationship quiet for now. The transition started slowly, with stolen kisses when no one else was looking, and much more free time dedicated to simply spending time together. They would lie awake for hours in each other’s dorm rooms, talking about science, their lives, and their futures.

Haven and Tadashi never got the chance to make the possibility of a future between the two of them official. Their junior year, Tadashi helped his brother Hiro enter the SFIT school science fair. Haven had heard so much about Hiro, and the whole group was there to support Tadashi’s younger brother. The kid was only 13, but he may have been the smarted thirteen-year-old Haven had ever known. Even at his young age, Hiro would be a perfect fit at SFIT. When a mysterious fire broke loose at the fair, everything changed. Students, faculty, and visitors all evacuated, and not moments after the last person was out of the building, the whole place exploded. When the smoke cleared in the early hours of the morning, one thing was clear:

Tadashi never made it out of the building.

Haven had never imagined heartbreak to feel this way. A piece of her heart was missing, and Haven was sure it would never feel whole again. How do you move on from such a loss? Whatever Haven felt at the loss of Tadashi, she put on a brave face when around her friends. Haven wasn’t going to stop being the ray of sunlight and optimism she’d always been, for all of them, for herself, and especially for Hiro. The young boy had now lost both his parents and his older brother, and with all the love she had for Tadashi, she was going to look after Hiro as much as she could.

With SFIT destroyed, the students were relocated to Elias. The new location helped Haven move on. She graduated from Walt University with top honors and started working toward building the future she’d talked so often about with Tadashi. Now she’s attending graduate school, working part time in a lab, and working as a teaching assistant in the Walt chemistry department. Tadashi is on her mind constantly. But Haven is looking forward to better days.  

Second character choice

n/a

It’s time to see that sample para.

Peach cream smudged cheeks. A thin, careful stroke of liner. Mascara. Waterproof. Uncertainty behind saddened eyes. Hair twisted up into a high bun. The best way to keep it out of her experiments. He’d casually remarked that one day. Still she let wispy bangs hang loose. A generous swipe of neutral toned lipstick. Lips pressed together to distribute the color, and Haven sighed.

Heartbreak wasn’t supposed to happen this way. The love of your life wasn’t supposed to die at twenty-one.

Haven stared at her reflection, and the person staring back at her seemed like a muted version of herself. A neutral face, hair up, black dress, black tights, black everything. Haven fidgeted with the peter pan collar at her neck, the white a stark contrast to everything else. It seemed both so wrong and right at the very same time. She’d never been one to conform, and for that moment she knew that even in his death, Tadashi would be proud. Glasses were carefully replaced to their spot at the bridge of her nose. She’d chosen the translucent pair for this occasion.

A faint drizzle had started as she stepped out from the dorms, and she wondered idly how long the students would be able to stay. There wasn’t exactly a school anymore, but that was a worry for Future Haven. The weather wasn’t a surprise, especially for northern California this time of year, but still it felt appropriate. As if they sky, too, knew of the tragedy they mourned today. Meteorology was a science, after all, and whether they knew it or not, the science community had suffered a great loss.

By the time they reached the cemetery, rain poured from the sky. A fitting welcome, Haven thought, quickly stepping beneath Wyatt’s unfurled umbrella. Hers was a bright pink, a perfect spot of brightness in normal dreary weather, but today that didn’t seem right. Eventually Haven knew she’d put on her bright sunny disposition as often as she could, but right now was a time to let themselves mourn.

The service wasn’t terribly long, expected due to the rain. The plot was near his parents’, and every so often, Haven would look over to glimpse at Hiro. She couldn’t imagine how he was handling things right now. When all was said and done, the group began to disperse, planning to gather afterwards at Aunt Cass’s where friends and family could drink tea and share memories. Their little friend group, now minus a member, lingered, and she’s pretty sure it was Leiko who shoved the umbrella in her hand before they, too, left for the Lucky Cat.

So this was it. Haven Lemos, alone, and Tadashi Hamada’s grave. The plot of grass where he’d lay forever. It wasn’t far from where his parents lay, the three of them at least together again in their final resting place. Haven’s eyes lingered on the headstone, and the hyphen within which Tadashi’s entire life lay. All of his accomplishments, his light, his laughter, his love, her love for him, his brain, his smile, reduced to a punctuation mark, followed by a date past which the two of them would never truly be a couple.

Moments passed until finally Haven knew it was time. Gently she placed her hand atop the marble headstone, caressing it as if she would his face. The ‘I love you’ was implicit; she needn’t speak those three little words aloud. Gathering herself, Haven tightened her grip on the umbrella before heading in the direction of the Lucky Cat Café to meet up with the others at Aunt Cass’s.

This wasn’t the last time she’d see this place.

Anything else, love?

sad breakfast club

[lost-n-stereo]

A/N: Nabrina Prompt #18 “Did i ever tell you how beautiful your eyes are?”

and I keep waiting (but I won’t say I’m waiting)

They say time heals all wounds.

That would be great if she wasn’t practically immortal, in an odd limbo where her body is barely changing but her friends are growing up and moving on.

You would think that it would hurt less as the days go by, since it’s been nearly two years since Nick sacrificed himself for the greater good and Lilith took him to hell. Except, he didn’t sacrifice himself for the greater good, he sacrificed himself for her. And that makes it a hell of a lot tougher to let go.

The first few months were the worst, when it was still fresh, always there in the back of her mind that he was possibly suffering in hell because of her. She took solace in Lilith’s promise to watch over him but it didn’t keep her from imagining horrible scenarios of torture and pain.

The Fright Club met often, dreaming up ways to go into hell to rescue Nick. They plotted ways to get Lucifer out of his body, searched tomes and spell books for clues or incantations, but always came up just a little too short.

Things changed within their friend group gradually over the last two years of mortal high school. Theo started dating a sweet girl from Riverdale and started spending less time with them. Roz and Harvey took a break in their junior year, in which time Sabrina and Harvey gave it another shot. They soon realized their mistake, that their love was one based in their past, and it wasn’t long before Harvey and Roz were back together for good.

Sabrina wasn’t waiting for Nick, exactly, but she always had him in the back of her mind. And always in her heart. She went on dates with nice boys, mortal and warlock alike, but never felt the connection she’d had with him.

“Tell me again why I decided to go to school all the way across the state,” Roz says, her voice pulling Sabrina out of her mind and back into the room her best friend is currently packing up.

“Because it’s fun and exciting,” Sabrina says, shaking off her inner monologue, as she grabs a pink stuffed bunny off of Roz’s nightstand. “Are you taking Mr. Wiggles with you?”

Roz laughs. “I’m eighteen now. Do I really need to bring my childhood toys with me to college?” She nibbles on her bottom lip and both girls speak at the same time.

“Yes.”

Sabrina giggles and sets the bunny on an already packed suitcase. “I think he’ll fit right in. Are the boys still meeting us at the diner before you head out?”

“Yeah, Theo said they would meet us around five.”

It’s been a summer full of the four of them, which isn’t to say it’s been much different than every summer since before she could remember.

Summer always comes with an expiration date. The days are long and warm, afternoons spent in Sweetwater River playing and splashing around with the kids from across the water and nights spent at bonfires and house parties. Fall is always a surprise no matter how much you’re prepared for it. She used to wait all summer long for autumn to hit. It meant her favorite season, her birthday and all the fun witchy holidays that she loved so much.

Now it’s just a reminder that high school is over and everyone is going their separate ways.

“I can’t believe I’m going to be all alone here for awhile,” Sabrina says wistfully. “Greendale won’t be the same without you guys.”

Roz stops packing, drops the dress she was holding into the open suitcase in front of her without folding it, and curls up on her bed with Sabrina. “You have so many responsibilities at the academy, time is going to fly by and before you know it, it’ll be Christmas break.”

“Winter solstice,” Sabrina amends and they both laugh. “You’re right. I’m just going to miss you all so much.”

They hug and Roz gives a watery laugh as she pulls away. “Okay, no more crying. We’re going to go have fun and we won’t be saying goodbye tonight. Just a ‘see you soon’.”

Sabrina nods and stands, wiping the corner of her eye with her thumb. “You’re right. Let’s get you packed up. You’ve got a long car ride ahead of you in the morning.”

*** The sun is shining high and bright when she wakes up the next day.

A look at her bedside clock tells her that it’s after nine, which means Roz and Harvey are already on the road and headed to their new school. Sabrina wasn’t surprised when Harvey told her months ago that he was applying to the same school as his girlfriend. Their relationship was built to last and it made her happy knowing they would have each other living so far from home. Theo wasn’t going far, only a short two hour drive away, so Sabrina knew she’d see him more often than the others.

She tried not to think about how she was losing her mortal friends to the real world. Instead, she decided to focus her attention to her non-mortal side and all of the people she still had here at home.

When Father Blackwood took off the Church of Night was left with only a handful of people, not many students at all. But with Aunt Zelda becoming High Priestess it brought forth a whole new group of witches and warlocks that were eager to study under her new leadership.

“Sabrina!”

Speaking of Aunt Zelda…

“I’m up!” She calls, popping up out of bed refreshed and ready to begin the next chapter of her life. Salem meows from his window perch and Sabrina smiles, scratches him on the head behind his ears the way she knows he likes. “You may not be a real cat, Salem. But you sure do purr like one.”

Twenty minutes later they are on their way to the academy, with Aunt Hilda and Ambrose in tow. Rebuilding the Church of Night was a family effort, one that Sabrina has not yet lived full time because of her dedication to finishing mortal high school. Now, she can not only help her family in their quest to make the church one that is wholly inclusive and thriving, but she can finish her dark arts studies without having to juggle her mortal ones.

“Conjuring today, eh Sabrina?” Ambrose asks as they walk through the doors of Gehenna Station. After passing all of her general courses last semester she’s finally able, and more than ready, to start her conjuring training.

In reality, she doesn’t need schooling or classes or spells, even. Learning you’re the daughter of Lucifer Morningstar, with power most witches and warlocks can only imagine, was difficult to come to terms with. She decided that she wouldn’t use those powers unless absolutely necessary and instead sticks to the magic used by everyone else.

“I’m excited,” she says as they pass the new sculpture in the center of the room, Lilith in her true form, beauty and power emanating from the carved stone. “Conjuring was always Nick’s favorite...”

Ambrose frowns when he sees Sabrina’s face fall. “I’m sorry, cousin. I know it doesn’t get any easier. But one day, maybe…”

“It’s a big maybe, Ambrose,” she says sadly. “Plus, there’s no use thinking about it constantly. Thinking about it changes nothing. I’m going to focus on what is happening in the here and now.”

“Good on you, Sabrina.” Aunt Zelda steps up beside her and looks up at the statue of Lilith. “I’m sure the Queen of Hell is watching over your young warlock as we speak. She knows how important he was to you.”

“Is,” Sabrina corrects gently. “How important he is to me.”

***

August turns into September and then into October with little fanfare.

She keeps in touch with Harvey, Roz and Theo over group chats and Skype sessions. There are tentative plans for Halloween, also known as her birthday, but she knows there are no guarantees when it comes to long distance friendships. They have mortal responsibilities that she just doesn’t have any more.

Besides, even if her eighteenth birthday is spent with just her aunties and Ambrose, it will still be fun.

“I love this weather,” Sabrina says to Ambrose as they walk through the woods on their way home from the academy. “The sky looks like it could crack open at any time. I can’t wait for the rain to begin.”

“Agree completely, cousin. All feels right in the world when it’s dark and gloomy.”

Sabrina kicks a small rock out of the way of the path with the toe of her boot. “How’s Prudence? Have you spoken with her?”

Ambrose shrugs and offers a small smile. “Still on the hunt for her father, o’course. I wish I could be out there with her but…”

“But Aunt Zelda needed you,” Sabrina finishes for him and he nods.

“She’s a strong girl, that one. I know she’ll find him and when she does…I’ll be there to help take him down.”

It’s been strange being at the academy without Prudence, especially considering two thirds of the Weird Sisters are still attending students. Dorcas and Agatha have been unlikely friends, although Sabrina thinks sometimes it’s her heritage they admire in her and not her personality.

Still, it’s nice to have friends.

“So what’s the big plan for your birthday this year, cuz? Your friends making the trip?”

Sabrina sighs. “I’m honestly not sure. They are so busy with school and the distance is a lot. I’m hopeful but won’t be disappointed if they can’t make it.”

“Very mature of you,” he says with a grin and she smacks him on the arm.

“Well I am almost an adult.”

Ambrose snorts, winds his arm through Sabrina’s and leads her towards their house.

“Trust me, cousin. You’re nowhere near an adult. Now your 118th birthday? That’s when the real fun begins.”

***

A knock on the front door wakes her up at 12:03 am on October 31st.

“Can’t even get a good night’s sleep the night before my birthday,” she mumbles as she climbs out of bed, slipping into a robe and a pair of slippers to save her bare feet from the cold wood floor.

No one else in the house woke up to the knock, which surprises her not at all. Her family sleeps like the dead most of the time and the knock isn’t particularly loud or demanding. In fact, she’s shocked that she heard it at all.

It doesn’t occur to her to maybe be wary of a knock sounding at midnight. There could be an untold number of dangers awaiting her on the other side but she doesn’t feel fearful at all.

Nothing can prepare her for what’s actually on the other side of the door.

“Happy Birthday, Spellman.”

Sabrina’s breath catches in her throat and she’s scared this is some kind of trick. An evil manipulation, perhaps, although she has no current enemies that she can think of. Except Lucifer, obviously, but he’s supposed to be in hell. In Nick. Except…

“Nicholas?”

“Hello, Sabrina.”

He looks exactly the same as when she last saw him, except his eyes aren’t red with the devil inside. There are no marks or blemishes on his skin, no visible signs of torture like she was afraid of.

“How…? What…?”

Nick chuckles softly. “Two very excellent questions. Sabrina…”

Her name is barely out of his mouth when she flings herself at him, her hands coming up to touch his hair, his face, his shoulders. He’s so solid and strong and real.

“I can’t believe you’re really here,” she says, relishing the feel of his arms around her waist. “I don’t know how this is possible but I almost don’t care.”

“Lilith,” he whispers. “She found a way to contain him in Hell. I can explain it all to you but right now…”

His fingers card through her hair and she smiles against his lips when he presses them to hers.

“Your hair is longer,” he says when they pull apart. His eyes are intense when he looks down at her and she blushes.

“What?”

“Did i ever tell you how beautiful your eyes are? Because the memory of them has kept me sane for the last two years and now, looking into them…it’s like a dream come true.”

Her blood warms at his confession. “Nicholas.”

He kisses her again and she can feel in that single moment the amount of love and devotion that he has for her. Nothing that’s ever happened in her life thus far feels like this.

“I know we have a lot to talk about,” he says, his eyes downcast. “So much happened before I left and I know how angry you must be with me.”

Sabrina shakes her head, puts her hand on his cheek so he’s forced to look at her. “I was angry, Nick. But I also missed you terribly. And I know why you did what you did. It doesn’t make it easier or excuse it but I do understand.”

“I’m so sorry, Spellman.” He practically collapses into her when he hugs her again and she can actually feel the wave of exhaustion roll off of him. “I promise to make it up to you.”

“Stay here tonight,” she whispers. “Come with me.”

She holds her hand out and he takes it, bringing it up to his lips to kiss her knuckles.

There is a piece of parchment on her bed that wasn’t there before. She turns it over in her hands to see a simple line etched in black ink.

Happy Birthday Sabrina. I told you I’d take good care of him.

“What is that?” Nick asks, coming around behind her to rest his chin on her shoulder.

“A birthday present from Lilith,” she says as she leans back into him.

“The parchment?”

Sabrina laughs, turns around in his arms and brings his head down for a kiss. “No, silly. It was you.”

***

She wakes up hours later to her aunts’ surprised voices.

“Nicholas? What are you doing here?!”

“And in Sabrina’s bed, no less!”

“Aunties,” she says, pulling her blanket up around her and Nick. “I’m eighteen and my boyfriend just escaped hell. Can you cut me a little bit of a break?”

Hilda mumbles something about baking a cake and Zelda eyes Nick carefully.

“We’ll expect a full report of how exactly you’re back,” she says and Nick nods earnestly. “Well then, have a good morning you two.”

Ambrose passes by the doorway as Zelda is leaving. “Happy birthday, cousin.” He does a double take when he sees Nick. “Nicholas, good to have you back, friend.”

Nick laughs when the door closes again. “Your family is something else, Spellman.”

She turns so they are lying face to face. “I still can’t believe you’re here. In the flesh, lying next to me right now. I thought this day would never come.”

“Not me,” he says seriously. “Every single day I had to be away was just one day closer to being with you again.”

Sabrina sighs happily and lets him pull her body flush with his so he can kiss her. “Nick…what would you have done if I had, you know, moved on?”

“Cried.”  They both laugh and he drops feather light kisses to her nose, then her cheeks and forehead.  “It wouldn’t have mattered. As long as you’re safe and happy, that’s all I care about. You’re all I care about.”

He snuggles closer to her and kisses the top of her head.

“It would have really fucking sucked though.”

Sabrina laughs out loud, pulls him so he has to brace himself on both hands over her.

“Good thing for you the other boys I dated were so bland.”

Nick kisses her, presses his body down on hers a bit before sitting up with a start.

“Wait…what other boys?”

SEND ME A SHIP + PROMPT

[nicole-queen]

Not to be bitter, but... the NAS anime Yu-Gi-Oh is a failure of an adaptation.

Random Shadow Game between Yami Bakura and Atem during Duelist Kingdom, random Duel between Jonouchi and Atem during Duelist Kingdom, Otogi’s motivation being changed and removing his father, Otogi vs Atem at DDM being a thing and Atem using LITTLE WIZARD, random Duel between Jonouchi and Kaiba when Mai’s life is on the line, the complete rewrite of the origins of Duel Monsters and so on...

But still, nothing compares to the butchery the Millennium World arc suffered.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

some things that the anime completely fucked up:

A: Yami Bakura, for absolutely no logical reason, goes against Kaiba in a Shadow Game, where his Diabound monster (not to be confused with the Diabound Ka) copies BEWD’s Burst Stream of Destruction ability. Yami Bakura also gives Kaiba the Millennium Eye so that Kaiba could take part in the Memory World for absolutely no logical reason. THEN in the Memory World, Thief King Bakura’s Diabound uses Burst Stream of Destruction to stalemate Obelisk. ...

M: Yami Bakura gives the Millennium Eye to Yugi because all 7 Millennium Items are needed to open the Door to the Afterlife, as well as the Door to Darkness. Diabound also stands up to Obelisk by his own power.

-------

A: a lot of BEWD focus and Blue-Eyes Ultimate Dragon facing off against Zorc

M: Seto seeks the power of the White Dragon which supposedly is greater than that of the Gods, but the White Dragon doesn’t actually fight against Zorc or is measured against the Egyptian Gods

-------

A: Bobasa appears in the Memory World as comic relief that seemingly has no relevance to any actual plot, until he finally! takes Yugi and Co. to Atem’s tomb.

M: Bobasa appears right before Atem and Co. enter the Domino Museum and is immediately revealed as guarding the Millennium Scales and Millennium Key; Bobasa explains everything the group needs to know about the Memory World

-------

A: Thief King Bakura has some weird goons with glowing eyes and enters the royal palace with Akhenamkhanen’s sarcophagus

M: Thief King Bakura is acting entirely on his own and drags in Akhenamkhanen’s actual mummy

-------

A: Thief King Bakura in the Memory World is actually Yami Bakura who calls the Pharaoh “Yugi“ and is aware that he is playing a Shadow Game

M: Thief King Bakura is a legitimate remnant of his 3,000 years old self, has no awareness of Yugi’s existence or the Shadow RPG, only cares about getting his revenge for the Kul Elna massacre, calls Atem “Pharaoh“

-------

A: DIADHANKS DIADHANKS DIADHANKS DIADHANKS DIADHANKS (literal Duel Disks in Ancient Egypt that are worn by Millennium Items wielders in order to summon their Ka and gauge their Ba level................)

M: .........

-------

A: Yugi and Co. aimlessly wander in mind-boggling filler

M: Yugi and Co. quickly realize they have to find out the Pharaoh’s lost name

-------

A: Seto is less assured, has everyone convincing him not to join his father or be manipulated by him

M: Seto is far more antagonistic then his anime version, he is willing to torture people and talks about “shadow politics”, while Akhenaden is trying to reason with him so that he doesn’t commit the same sin he did

“A small sacrifice of the people… isn’t even worth a pebble from the Valley of the Kings.“

“I will make the White Dragon my servant, no matter what… even if I must sacrifice the life of the wielder…“

------- 

A: Seto saves Kisara when they were kids, Seto sees the White Dragon

M: Seto meets Kisara during his Ka hunt and he has just heard about the White Dragon minutes prior

-------

A: Diabound slices Saint Dragon of Osiris in half after Akhenaden harms the stone slab of SDoO

M: Saint Dragon of Osiris is weakened from Diabound’s attack but otherwise unharmed

-------

A: Yami Bakura is in Thief King Bakura’s body from the beginning of the Memory World

M: Yami Bakura possesses Thief King Bakura’s body when the latter gets taken out by Atem and the Winged Dragon of Ra

-------

 A: natural disasters starts happening all over the real world because of the events in the Shadow RPG

M: the Shadow RPG takes place within the Millennium Puzzle and doesn’t affect the outside world

-------

A: Yami Bakura has Kaiba enter the Memory World so that he can use his Ba to restore his power, just like Yugi did for Atem. (He invited Kaiba BEFORE he knew Yugi and Co. would change the events through the soul transferrence, so continuity makes no sense...)

M: Thief King Bakura has enough Ba to sustain two Ka at once, as well as take on all the Priests + Pharaoh while they quickly drain their Ba

-------

A: Yami-Bakura-in-Thief-King-Bakura’s body believes the Pharaoh’s lost name (+ the 7 Millennium Items) is needed to unseal Zorc, which is why he hijacks Honda

M: placing the 7 Millennium Items in the Tablet of Lost Memories is all that is required to unseal Zorc

-------

A: Yugi and Co. fed a hungry Bobasa with grapes so he will take them to the Pharaoh’s tomb................

M: Bobasa turns into Hasan, who says that his role is to take them to the Pharaoh’s lost name when Zorc is unsealed

-------

A: Yami Bakura uses his freezing time ability on Yugi and Co.

M: Yugi and Co. are NPC that aren’t affected by the freezing of time

-------

A: Yami Bakura says he would be in trouble if Kisara doesn’t go to Seto...........

M: ?????? Yami Bakura doesn’t know or care about Kisara/Blue-Eyes White Dragon

-------

A: Kisara and Kaiba run into each other

M: ...........

-------

A: Atem fights with Seto before the final fight with Zorc

M: Atem fights with Seto (joined with Akhenaden) after Zorc is defeated

-------

A: Atem fusions himself with Blue-Eyes Ultimate Dragon into Master of Dragon Knight......

M: ......... KAIBA WASN’T PRESENT.

-------

A: Zorc defeats the Egyptian Gods

M: Zorc never faces the Egyptian Gods, Atem just merges them into Horakhty

-------

A: during the Ceremonial Duel, Atem summons all 3 Egyptian Gods and too much time is spent on them

M: Atem summons Obelisk which Yugi immediately takes out, Yugi cancels the summon of Saint Dragon of Osiris, Winged Dragon of Ra makes no appearance

-------

A: Atem runs all 3 God Cards relatively early in the Duel, and even has them out simultaneously, which makes the revival of Saint Dragon of Osiris underwhelming.

M: Yugi guesses Atem would probably run 1 God Card due to the Tributes required. At the end, Atem cheats Saint Dragon of Osiris into play with Monster Reborn. Turns out Yugi predicted that all along and countered it.

-------

A: Atem has to encourage Yugi not to give up during the Duel.

M: Yugi is already resolved to fight.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

some things the anime completely fucked up by NOT showing:

ATEM STRAIGHT UP SHOVING THIEF KING BAKURA AWAY FROM HIS FATHER’S MUMMY AND CRADLING IT AND THEN TELING THIEF KING BAKURA “I’M GOING TO DESTROY YOU.”

Seriously, the entire scene of Atem carrying his father’s mummy in his arms, “I can still feel your love...”

far better action in the Diabound battles

Atem and Thief King Bakura being far more badass

the Priests and Pharaoh having mock battles to train their Ka

Atem defeating a cocky Seto with a Kuriboh Ka, in order to teach him that power isn’t everything

“This tomb is yours, Bakura!”; “This is our grave.”, “Do you honestly think you can defeat me?”; Mahado not using part of his Heka in order to keep the evil in the Millennium Ring suppressed

far better action in the Thief King Bakura vs Mahado battle

the group places their hands atop one another, thinking about Atem and Bobasa immediately goes “THE POWER OF THE MILLENNIUM PUZZLE IS THE POWER OF UNITY” (because Shadi already witnessed the power of their friendship) and Yugi is “THE DOOR THAT YOU CAN SHOW, BUT YOU CAN’T SEE…”; THEIR FRIENDSHIP LITERALLY OPENS THE DOOR TO THE MEMORY WORLD

Thief King Bakura killing everyone in the tavern as he enjoys his food

far better action in the Diabound vs Saint Dragon of Osiris battle

”I’ll fight until the end!! That is the duty of the Pharaoh!”

High Priest of Darkness appearing to Akhenaden following Thief King Bakura’s assault on him

more in-depth talk of the Millennium Tome, Shadow Alchemy and the creation of the Millennium Items

”I was able to resist the evil power of the Millennium Ring…These spirits are nothing before my Heka!”

Atem and Yami Bakura/Zorc playing the Shadow RPG in the Domino Museum, as well as Ryo Bakura having created the Ancient Egypt diorama

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

There were far more examples, but I’m done with this trash.

Only redeeming thing this anime arc had was that Atem as a kid was super cute.

[mandowh0re]

The Universe Takes, and It Gives

CH 1

Summary: The war with Thanos is over, but some sacrifices still need to be made. Will Steve and Tony ever get their happy ending?

Warnings: language? Look you should know by now that all of my fics have that. Angst, unhealthy coping habits, mentions of suicide, eventual fluff.

A/N: In this fic, Thanos happens earlier, Civil War didn’t happen, and Peter is a baby. I also made up the name of the orphanage because I didn’t want to do research. The irondad part of this will be in the next chapter okay thanks for coming to my ted talk.

Word Count: 1554

Happy reading!

In order to destroy the soul stone, someone had to sacrifice themselves.

Steve and Tony stood on the edge of the cliff on Vormir, with Red Skull and Strange waiting behind them.

“A sacrifice for a sacrifice.” Skull had told them.

They had been standing there in stunned silence for the past two minutes. Finally, Steve spoke up.

“It should be me.”

Tony’s head snapped up, his eyes meeting Steve’s.

“What?? No. It needs to be me-“

“The world needs Tony Stark,” Steve interrupted, “It needs its best defender. It doesn’t need Captain America anymore.”

“But I do, Rogers! You can’t just… You can’t just leave! I can’t lose you!”

His voice broke at the end, and by this time tears were streaming down his cheeks and he was choking back sobs.

“Tony,”

“What about everything we wanted? What about the future we talked about! I- I had a ring, dammit! I had a ring for you when this was all over with and I… I can’t do this! Please, you can’t do this,” Tony was full on sobbing now, no longer caring who saw him.

Steve was doing his best not to cry. He didn’t want Tony to see him cry, to see that he was scared. Or that he too, had a ring.

Steve opened one of the many zippers on his pant legs and pulled out a small black, silk bag with a red string that kept it tied shut.

He gently placed a hand on Tony’s cheek, the smaller man leaning into the touch, and kissed his forehead, then his lips. He placed the small contraption Tony had created to hold each infinity stone into his lover’s hands, along with the tony bag.

“Keep the world turning. Because it doesn’t stop without me.”

Tony’s eyes flew open, “Steve, no, please-!“

Tony reached out with his empty hand, but it was too late. Steve had let himself fall back off of the cliff. He watched with horror as the love of his life fell to his final death.

A world war, a fight with a psychopath with a tesseract, a plane crash, seventy years in ice, a fight against aliens, a fight against a HYDRA super soldier and the rest of the murderous group, only to die by his own sacrifice.

The next thing Tony knew, he was sitting in the water, a ways away from where he had previously been a just few seconds ago. In his hand was the purple infinity stone, shattered and no longer glowing.

Taking a few moments to gather what had just happened, he tossed the pieces into the water and opened the bag that was now soaked.

Tipping it upside down, a beautiful silver band tumbled out onto his calloused hand.

Tony’s breath caught in his throat.

Carefully turning the ring, he caught sight of inscription on the inside.

You have been in every way, all I could ever want. I love you.

Strange ended up having to come get him, opening the portal and the cloak carrying most of Tony’s weight as they walked back to Earth.

As soon as the pair came into sight, it was immediately obvious that Steve wasn’t coming back. Nobody spoke a word.

Bucky did, however, fall to his knees. Natasha and Sam went to help him.

Strange handed Tony off to Rhodey, who took him back to the compound to try and sleep, and told the others to meet up there later.

Of course, Tony didn’t sleep. He didn’t eat. He didn’t tinker. He stayed in bed and cried, sometimes showering, and only because Rhodey threatened to use sedatives and give him a sponge bath.

After two weeks of unhealthy habits, starving himself, little to no sleep, and hardly getting any sunlight, Tony’s body shut down.

He was sitting at the table in the dining area, attempting to stomach the noodle soup Rhodey made for him when his vision began to blur and his hearing began to ring. When he tried to say something, he fell to the floor.

The first time he came to he couldn’t open his eyes, and his hearing was muffled, like he was underwater.

“-blood sugar is way too low… gurney up here…”

“-carry him…”

“-heart attack?”

Then he was out again.

The second time he came to he was laying on something softer. But he still couldn’t manage to open his eyes, or even move, to attempt to figure out his situation.

And to make matters worse, this time his hearing wasn’t even clear enough to make out any words around him.

Just an annoying rapid beep.

And what seemed like shouting.

Then he was out again.

The third time he came to, he woke up on the shore of the most beautiful beach he had ever seen. The sand was pink and the water was crystal clear. The sun was high and glittering off the water. There were shells scattered about. But not the tiny, broken, malformed shells you usually find. No, these were fully shaped, brightly colored shells, along with sea glass and sea dollars.

He looked around, finding he was the only one there.

“Hello?” He called out.

“Hello.” Answered an angelic voice.

He turned back around towards the water to see a woman walking out of the water onto shore. She was glowing, literally. Her dress was tan and seemed to flow with gold. Her hair was loose down her back, and a tiara sat on her head perfectly. Water droplets glinted off her dark skin.

For the first time in a long time, Tony was rendered absolutely speechless.

The woman smiled at him, stopping a few feet away.

“I have been so excited for this day. To finally meet the great Anthony Edward Stark. The mortal who defied all odds.”

Tony cleared his throat, his brain finally kicking into gear.

“I- I’m sorry. Who are you?”

“I do not have a name. Nor am I a being. I simply am.”

“That… Actually is the furthest thing from an answer.”

The woman chuckled.

“I am everything. I am the universe. But for the sake of making things easier, you may call me Celeste.”

Tony raised an eyebrow, “You’re the universe… Like you control all things and are all things?”

Celeste shrugged, “In a sense. I am here to help you-”

Tony scoffed, taking a step back, “Help me? Help me?? I’ve been suffering my whole life; I lost my parents, was blown up, tortured, ripped open, backstabbed, poisoned, beaten, lost the love of my life, and now you want to help me??” By now Tony was pacing, his heart pounding in his ears.

Celeste sighed, “Please believe that none of that was my doing. There is good and bad in the universe. As you already know. I am in control over the good. My brother is in control over the bad. Since you were born, we both knew you were destined for greatness, but we both wanted your greatness to amount to something different. When you became a hero, he became angry.

But when you destroyed the infinity stones and defeat a monster who was out to destroy half of of our being, he gave in. I can finally give you what you want most.” She spoke with confidence and power. She outstretched her hand and a white light moved from her palm to Tony, manifesting itself into Steve’s Captain America helmet.

“Steve,” Tony whispered.

But it seemed too good to be true.

“There is just one thing I ask in return,”

“Anything,” Tony looked back up at her.

“There is a boy. He is just over a year old. He lost everyone in this war. He needs someone. You and Steven will adopt him. Raise him as your own. This boy is special, and will grow up to change the world.”

Tony deflated, “Are you kidding me? I can’t just, become a parent! I’m not built to be one! Have you seen me lately? My boyfriend commits suicide to save the rest of us and I’m nearly killing myself.”

The woman only nods, “In time, it will come to you. Just like fighting, it is all in your instincts. You are a smart man, Anthony. You have many people by your side. And you would have Steven as well.”

Tony pulls at his hair and squeezes his eyes shut.

Get Steve back, and adopt a baby?

Maybe it wouldn’t be too bad. They’d finally have the little family they’d always joked about.

“Fine. Fine. I’ll do it. Just, please, give me back-“

***

“Steve!” Tony sat straight up clutching at nothing.

“Woah, Tony, calm down.” Bruce gently pushed Tony back against the medical bed.

“But S-Steve he sh-should have-“

“Yeah, he’s in the next room. Cho’s checking him right now.” Tony relaxed and Bruce made himself busy with checking his vitals, asking him basic questions, and checking his reflexes. Finally, he brought up the elephant in the room, “He just… Appeared out of nowhere. I thought you said he was dead?”

Tony stared at the wall, then at the TV which was displaying the news on mute.

At that moment, the name Queens Heart of Children Orphanage came across the screen, making Tony’s heart squeeze in a way he didn’t quite expect.

“Yeah,” he replied, “He was.”

***

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Strikethrough means I couldn’t tag you.

[lady-divine-writes]

Need for Speed:New York - Chapter 2 (Rated NC17)

Summary:

It's been years since high school graduation, and Kurt and Blaine are living the lives of their dreams in New York City alongside their best friends, Nick and Jeff. Car racing behind them, they're working towards the future - Kurt and Jeff at NYADA, Blaine and Nick at NYU. But soon after moving from their tiny apartments to a bigger loft, bits and pieces of Ohio start to weed their way in to their lives - along with some New York grown angst, causing rifts that hopping behind the wheel of a Mustang might not be able to solve.

Notes: This was supposed to upload on Saturday, but I need a little positivity today, so I'm indulging. But there will be another chapter up Sat/Sun. Thank you all for your support <3

Read on AO3.

“A new bed, a new dresser, a new desk, a refrigerator … wait. I thought the loft came with a refrigerator?” Blaine said.

“It does, but it’s from the 50s,” Kurt said, racing down the sidewalk to the NYADA main entrance with his phone pressed to his ear. “It’s retro chic, but I worry about its energy efficiency.”

“Do you wanna get rid of it or …?”

“No way! Are you kidding? It’s too trendy to get rid of. We’ll use it as a show piece or something. We just can’t put food in it. Or plug it in.”

“O-kay. You know, it’s a good thing we’re getting such a good deal on this loft seeing as we’re rebuying every piece of furniture we own.”

“Not every piece.”

“Most of them.”

“It’s a good investment. As far as I’m concerned, the furniture we have is full to the brim with bad juju.” Kurt hurried through the double doors as a throng of other students walked out - a group of theater majors so enthralled in a debate over whether Williams, Shaw, or O’Neill were the best playwright of their time, they didn’t see Kurt until they ran into him. “The dresser’s way too small, the couch cushions are flat as pancakes, and the legs of the bed are shot from moving it in and out of the kitchen all summer long.”

“Are you sure that’s the reason our bed’s legs are shot?”

“That’s the one I’m going with while I’m out in public.”

“And I’m guessing an exorcism is out of the question?”

“I’m not too sure the Catholic Church would be eager to help us. Besides, you honestly think that would be cheaper than a trip to IKEA?”

“Hmmm … probably not.”

Kurt sighed, sliding his messenger bag, then his coat, off his shoulders and shaking out the rain. “I’m sorry. Is this too much? I think I kind of jumped into this without consulting you first.”

“No, no! Not at all! I’m not complaining, I swear! I’m just bustin’ your chops. I think it’s adorable. And it’ll probably be cheaper in the long run to buy brand new stuff than to cart our old junk to the new place.”

“Exactly,” Kurt concurred even though that particular argument hadn’t crossed his mind.

“Plus, I fully support any opportunity you find to spread your designing wings. Speaking of, you’re letting me foot the bill for this shopping spree, right?”

“Absolutely not! 50/50. That’s the arrangement.”

“If that’s how you want it, darling. But you know …” Blaine’s voice slid lower and Kurt grinned, knowing that something suggestive was about to come out of his boyfriend’s mouth “… I could pay the bill, and you could work off your half in trade.” He growled, and even though Kurt rolled his eyes, certain parts of his body rose to the occasion.

“You wish,” Kurt said, willing away the erection that sprang up like a Pavlovian dog at Blaine’s growl, which, at any other time, would be followed by his boyfriend on his hands and knees. That was difficult to accomplish from across town. “Come on, let me go! I have to get to my first class. I’m already late enough to not show up!” Damn Jeff and Nick for not coming home last night, Kurt thought as he carefully folded his soaked coat inside out and draped it over his arm. Since their normal five a.m. shenanigans didn’t wake Kurt up, and his alarm never does, he was late getting ready, late for the train, and now, he’s just plain late for the day.

Honestly, that was on him for linking his circadian rhythm to his friends’ sex schedule.

But late for his first class meant his day was shot, so he might as well go home and keep packing, right?

Sounded reasonable to him.

“Alright, alright, alright! Get to class! Do all the things! I’ll see you later this afternoon, and then maybe we could do a little house warming celebrating of our own.” Blaine growled again, and Kurt re-positioned his sopping wet coat over the front of his jeans so as to not to make a scene.

“You order a pizza and I’ll grab a sleeping bag from the apartment on my way over.”

“It’s a date. Bye, darling.”

“Bye.” Kurt hung up the call. He shivered when the doors behind him opened, ushering in a breeze that spiraled through his damp clothes and straight to his bones. He started down the hall, trying to remember whether or not he’d left a change of clothing in his locker in the costume closet. If not, he could always borrow something. What plays were going on right now? Much Ado About Nothing? Waiting for Godot? Cat on a Hot Tin Roof? There had to be a pair of jeans and a semi-fashionable button-down shirt in there that would fit him. Or he could throw caution to the wind and dress up in a brocade vest, a long coat, and pantaloons. With the risky outfits he wore during high school, period dress was something he hadn’t tried. NYADA seemed like the perfect place to explore those vistas in fashion. Maybe he could start a trend. He was interning at Vogue. He needed to do more to stretch boundaries, be bold, start a movement.

Get dry. Because the longer he waited, the tighter his jeans became. They were tight enough as it was. Squishing his junk was not the fashion statement he needed to start today.

A familiar voice stopped him before he could convince himself to go to his second lecture dressed like Benedick … or Beatrice.

Not just stopped but skidded to a halt, nearly rolling his right ankle in the process.

“Hello, gorgeous. I think you forgot your bag.”

“Sebastian?” Kurt spun around. And as implausible as it seemed, Sebastian Smythe was standing behind him, Kurt’s messenger bag slung over his shoulder. He looked dryer than Kurt, so he couldn’t have just gotten there. But why was he there at all? “Oh my God!” Kurt opened his arms and hugged him without giving it a second thought. “We haven’t seen you in forever! I thought you were overseas! What are you doing in New York?”

Sebastian returned the hug single-armed. ““Haven’t you heard? I go here now.”

Kurt stepped out of Sebastian’s embrace so quickly, he almost succeeded in twisting that ankle. “Wait? What? Are you serious?”

“Yeah.” He brought his left arm forward, showing Kurt a stack of books he held clutched in his hand. The top one Kurt recognized right away as Intro to Theater. That happened to be the class he was missing this very moment. The second was A History of Shakespearean Dress Making, the elective Kurt had fourth today, and the third … The Beginner’s Guide to Mime? Kurt didn’t understand. Wasn’t Sebastian attending Oxford or something? Why would he be in New York taking theater, mime, and dress making? It didn’t make sense. “Wha---what, are you … did you really … how in the hell did you …?” Kurt went silent, mouth open as a dozen questions clogged up his throat like rush hour traffic.

He flashed back to his own audition for NYADA – the grueling hour spent in the April Rhodes Auditorium singing his prepared musical theater piece and sight reading another. He had to juggle set design, costume, and choreography all at a professional level to prove that he had what it took to go to this school. Jeff, who auditioned in dance, had to prepare two separate solos – one classical ballet and one hip-hop. At an additional placement interview, Kurt had to prepare another musical theater piece as well as deliver a monologue, and Jeff had to come up with three more dance routines – jazz, interpretive, and contemporary.

Kurt knew that Sebastian had music in his arsenal. He was co-captain of The Warblers at Dalton, but that was show choir. They sang top 40 hits and pulled off some synchronized swaying – nothing to the level of a NYADA audition. Kurt attended the last Warbler concert of their senior year with Blaine. Sebastian had a solo. Kurt remembered thinking he had a decent voice – better than decent, actually.

But that was about it.

Afterwards, at a mixed crew going-away party, Sebastian drank three beers and smoked a joint – something Kurt would never think of doing as a performer. His body was his instrument. He wouldn’t do anything that might put it out of tune.

Going to a school like NYADA wasn’t only about talent. It was about passion and sacrifice. Sebastian never said a word about wanting to join the arts professionally. Was he keeping it a secret – maybe from his dad? Maybe his life was like George the janitor’s and he was waiting for his moment to break free.

Could he have actually made it into NYADA?

“Wait, wait, wait! Hold up!” Sebastian juggled the books in his hand to grab his phone and snap a pic. The flash went off in Kurt’s face, but he didn’t even blink. Sebastian looked at the image on his screen and chortled. “Oh yeah! That's a keeper!”

“I still don’t … I don’t … how did you …?”

“I don’t go here, ya psycho!” Sebastian snorted, setting the books down on a nearby chair. “I came here to see you! The tuition here’s highway robbery, and the audition requirements are insane! You really have to commit yourself to a life of suffering and poverty to want to go here, no offense.”

“None taken, you useless walnut. Then where did you get those?” Kurt pointed at the books.

“I borrowed them from the library. I thought it would give me provenance, help me look the part.”

“A-ha. So you came here looking for me, and when you couldn’t find me, you went to the library and grabbed those books to pretend you go here on the off chance I’d walk through the door and you could pull this elaborate prank on me?”

Sebastian shrugged. “Worked, didn’t it?”

Kurt chuckled. “Yup. I guess it did. You’re one lucky bastard.”

“That, and I ran into Jeff about half an hour ago. He said you’d probably be along soon.”

“He should know. He’s the reason I’m late, the jerk. You still haven’t told me what you’re doing in New York?”

“Yeah …” Sebastian glanced down at his feet, worrying the linoleum with the toe of his sneaker “… well, after a few laps around the world, I got bored and decided it was time to settle down for a while. So I thought I’d come back to the states, go to school and finish my degree.”

“What degree?” Kurt asked, deciding he could afford to miss one Intro to Theater class to catch up with an old friend. Besides, this information was bordering on gossip, and Kurt wasn’t one to kick gossip out of bed.

“Originally, I was going to go into law. Become a states’ attorney like my dad. But it seemed empty to me. So I gave it some thought and asked myself – when was the last time I really enjoyed myself? The last time I was really happy? Aside from driving, the answer to that was music. And since I didn’t see myself becoming the next Dale Earnhardt, Jr. …”

“Mmm … probably not …” Kurt teased.

“… I applied to the music therapy program at NYU.”

Kurt’s nose scrunched. “The same program Blaine’s in?”

“Yup.” Sebastian’s eyes sheepishly found his sneaker again. “I’ll admit, I got the idea from his Facebook posts. It looks like something he really enjoys. Something that adds value to his life. That’s something I need more of – value.” He pinched his lower lip between his teeth. “That doesn’t make you uncomfortable, does it? I mean, I know we all have a past and everything but …”

“But we’ve gotten over it,” Kurt said. “I swear. Color me a little bit shocked, but that’s all. How big of an asshole would I have to be if I said ‘I know you finally found your purpose in life, but you need to give it up and leave’?”

“Pretty big,” Sebastian agreed.

“That doesn’t mean it’s open season on my man or anything.”

“Dammit!” Sebastian snapped his fingers in mock disappointment. “I’m heading his way now, and I was hoping for a little bathroom bj action.”

Kurt crossed his arms over his chest. “Nice.”

“I’m kidding! Kidding! Please, don’t hate me … or murder me in my sleep.”

“Hmph! I’ll think about it.”

Sebastian nodded, the last dregs of laughter fading in his throat. “All joking aside, I wanted to connect with you first. I wanted you to hear from me instead of Blaine that I was here.” Sebastian looked Kurt up and down, but not in the way he used to. Not in a way that made Kurt’s skin crawl. This was a different Sebastian Smythe. A new Sebastian Smythe. Kurt hoped this one stuck around for a while. “You look good.” 

“Thanks,” Kurt said, grateful that Sebastian overlooked the drowned rat aesthetic he was still sporting. “So do you.”

“Do I?”

“Yes. You look happier. More ...” The first word that jumped to Kurt’s mind was mature, but he thought that would make him sound conceited “… put together.”

“It helps when you leave drama behind you and get your shit straightened out. Maybe now I can focus on the important things.”

“If you need anything, let us know,” Kurt said, offering Sebastian one last hug.

“I will.” Sebastian wrapped his arms around Kurt’s torso and gave him a squeeze. He slipped Kurt’s bag over his shoulder, adjusting the curled strap for longer than necessary. “I have to go. Time to head over to NYU and bug your boyfriend.”

“He’ll be at lunch in about an hour. You can catch him at Kimmel Marketplace. Oh, and if you see Nick, do me a favor and punch him in the shoulder for me. I have to hunt down Jeff and do the same.”

“Of course, but why?”

“Oh, they know what they’ve done.”

***

“So, you’re moving, huh?” Green eyes narrowed to judgmental slits, waiting for Blaine to answer.

“Uh … yeah,” Blaine replied, fishing through his bag for his notebook. He was supposed to have three, but he could only find two. He smirked, wondering if Kurt had grabbed it by accident, seeing how distracted he was when he ran out to catch his train this morning.

Blaine felt slightly guilty for that one. Kurt blamed Jeff and Nick’s absence for his lateness.

But Blaine had been doing the distracting.

“And whose idea was that?”

“My boyfriend wanted to move and I thought it was a good idea, so … yeah.” Blaine grunted, pulling out each item one by one and stacking it neatly on the cafeteria table. “That’s pretty much how that went down.”

“I see.” Paul brushed a lock of blond hair out of his face and sipped his coffee, perturbed by this recent development. The apartment Blaine lived in (though Paul had never been there) was only a few subway stops away from NYU. Everything Blaine could ever need was here on campus. Everything. So he didn’t need to move. But apparently that wasn’t Blaine’s decision to make. His boyfriend did.  “Where to?”

“A loft out in Bushwick.”

“Bushwick?” Paul’s whole face crumpled in disgust. “Where the hell is Bushwick? It sounds like a slum.”

“It’s in Brooklyn. It’s actually a pretty nice neighborhood.”

“But what about all that travel? It’s still Brooklyn.”

“It’s not that big a deal. Besides, it’s worth it. You should see the place. It’s enormous!”

Paul smiled, the piercings in his dimples mirroring the glint in his eyes. “Is that an invitation?”

“Sure. I guess. I mean, I should step up and host study night now that I have the space. I’m sure Kurt won’t mind. I can probably connive him into making some snacks. He’s an amazing cook.”

“I’ll bet,” Paul said dryly. “You know, the course load only gets harder from here on out, so I hear. You really should consider living closer to campus.”

“I don’t know if you’ve been looking at the classifieds lately, but places near campus cost an arm and a leg. I’d like to keep mine for now. I’m not even in grad school yet,” Blaine said, chuckling at his own joke.

“Maybe you could find someone to bunk with during the week,” Paul suggested, sliding closer while Blaine had his back turned, head deep inside his bag, “and go to your loft on the weekends. I know a couple of guys who do that.” He snapped his fingers as if he just came up with a genius idea. “I have a fold-out couch. You can bunk with me whenever you’re working late, or you’re too tired to ride the subway … or you don’t want to go home.”

“I appreciate the offer, but I’d miss my boyfriend too much.” Blaine yanked out a handful of letters from Kurt and piled them on top of his text books. Paul watched, his lip curling once he noticed the flowery handwriting. “I can handle the extra commute. I’m a big boy.”

Paul grinned, looking Blaine over behind the safety of Blaine’s back, stopping when his eyes reached his ass. “I’m sure you are.”

“Anderson! Hey, Anderson!”

Blaine grinned to his eyebrows before he looked up. He’d recognize that voice, booming his name, anywhere. He’d heard rumors. He didn’t know if they’d be true.

Apparently, they were.

Walking through the cafeteria crowd came Sebastian Smythe, sauntering toward him, reminiscent of the first day they met in the commons at Dalton.

God! That simultaneously seemed like yesterday and ten years ago. Where had the time gone?

“Are you kidding me? Where in the hell did you come from?” Blaine leapt out of his seat and into Sebastian’s arms. “Last I heard, you were in London? Madrid?”

“Paris,” Sebastian said, lifting Blaine up a foot off the ground just because he could. “I just came from NYADA. Had a little fun scaring the shit out of your man. He said you might be here. Speaking of …” Sebastian’s smile dropped like a lead balloon when he caught sight of the guy  with the bottle blond mop and garish crayon red tips glaring daggers at him, as if he and Blaine had been enjoying an intimate lunch and Sebastian was intruding “… who the hell is this?”

“This is Paul Johnson,” Blaine said. “He’s my lab partner this semester.”

Sebastian didn’t offer him a hand. Paul didn’t offer one either.

“Yes,” Paul said, “but we’ve known one another since freshman year, so …” He left it open-ended, as if there were a whole history of him and Blaine understood within the invisible brackets bookmarking that unfinished statement. It was pretentious, and as a once pretentious person himself, it rubbed Sebastian the wrong way.

Blaine, however, didn’t seem to notice.

“Paul Johnson?” Sebastian huffed. “That sounds like a stripper name. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Stripping is a noble profession.”

Paul’s jaw locked tight. Blaine clapped Sebastian on the shoulder.

“Play nice,” he said. “So, what’s up? Did you get your books and shit? Do you know what classes you’re taking?”

“Haven’t got my books yet, dad,” Sebastian teased, “but I have my course list.” He handed Blaine his phone with his schedule listed on the screen. “According to this, I’ve got to get myself one of those …” He gestured dismissively at Paul.

“Too bad you weren’t here a few weeks ago. We could have been partners.”

From the corner of his eye, Sebastian saw Paul grimace.

“Wouldn’t that have been a hoot? Then I could have kept you out of trouble. Now I’ve gotta stalk your ass.” Another glare from Paul, but this time Sebastian matched it and held it, not blinking until Paul backed down … which he did, returning to the task of sulking inside his coffee cup. “Hey, do you happen to know where Nick is?”

“Uh, I think he’s at his internship already. Brown, Smith, Simon, and Kent on 5th Avenue. Why do you ask?”

“I’m supposed to punch him. Per Kurt’s request.” Sebastian pounded his left palm with his right fist and side-eyed Paul. “I could punch you instead. Something tells me Kurt would approve.”

“Ha … ha …” Blaine stepped between Sebastian and Paul and gave his old friend another hug. “It’s good to see you again, man, but unfortunately, we’ve got to get back to work.”

“Yes,” Paul said, his smug smile replacing the perma-glare on his face, “we’ve got to get back to work.”

“And I’ve got to swing by admissions,” Sebastian said, ignoring Paul, “but we’ll get together soon, right?”

“Absolutely! Did Kurt tell you about the new loft?”

“Nah. We only had time for a small make-out sesh. We didn’t get that far.”

Blaine raised an unamused brow. “You’re full of the jokes today, aren’t you?”

“He’s full of something,” Paul grumbled.

“Just excited to be back. And tryin’ to keep you on your toes. I’m harmless ... mostly.” Sebastian bumped the table with his thigh. Paul’s coffee cup tipped, sending him scrambling to catch it before it could fall off the edge.

“Right,” Blaine said, mildly confused. “I’ll shoot you the deets and you can come by for dinner. Otherwise, we’ll see you around campus?”

Sebastian threw a look over his shoulder, and since Paul had been boring holes in his back the whole time, willing him to move the hell on, he was in prime position to catch it. “I’m looking forward to it.”

[breyito]

Ash and Dust

Title: Ash and Dust

Words: 1990

Tags: Iron Dad. Angst. Trigger warning for violence and blood. Major Charcter Death. 

Notes: Well, I’ve had this in my head for a while now, actually. And I finally managed to finish it!!! Tbh, I adore IronStrange, but I just had this image of what would Tony do if this actually happened and, well, romance wasn’t in it lol. Sorry for always writing angst, but I’m pretty good at that, I think, lol. Somehow it comes easier to me. I have a lot of hc about how this could go on, so you are free to ask me!!! Idk if I’ll write a sequel, but I have all of these ideas. Also, super uninspired title, but what the hell, couldn’t think of anything else, so. Enjoy the tears ;P

When ashes begin to gather together, and people started to form out of thin air, Tony knew they had done it. They had won. Thanos was no more and the people he had killed on the Snap were back.

Breathing hard through broken ribs, he finally unclenched his left hand. The moment his fist opened, the gleaming Uru metal started to fall apart; burning his arm as it disintegrated, the skin turning black. The sharp pain started to go up and up his left arm, and the muscles became  unresponsive as the trauma settled in. He fell on his backside on the ground, gasping. He watched from side to side, taking in the people rejoicing, crying in each other’s arms. Children coming out of buildings and running towards their parents; adults and teens and elderly people embracing and kissing each other. Everybody was busy looking for their loved ones, and for once, he was invisible to their eyes.

But Rhodey immediately noticed him and walked through the crowd towards him to help. He left the armor dissolve and used its nanobots to cut the blood flow a few inches below his shoulder, making a tourniquet as tight as the bots could. Rhodey winced and murmured something about Tony probably losing his arm.

Tony though, paid it no mind. He was looking everywhere, trying to see Quill or Strange, the bug girl or the tattooed giant, someone, anyone that was with him on Titan. He needed to find his kid. Then it dawned on him.

Somehow, the possibility of people re-appearing where they had been when the Snap happened hadn’t occurred to him. How could that have slipped his mind? God, he needed to find Rockett, he needed to plan for the space trip, he needed supplies and a time-line and medical personnel probably; because there was nothing on Titan, nothing people could live from. The others would be hungry and thirsty when they got there, but Peter...Peter would be malnourished, famished by the time they arrived. Stumbling he got to his feet, grabbing Rhodey’s shoulder for support.

“Rockett...Rockett” he mumbled.

“What?” Rhodey asked, baffled.

“Wher-where is he? We need to get to a ship, we, we need to get to Titan, we-”

“Tony, what are you talking about? You need a hospital right now; you’re not leaving the planet. We won, there’s no reason to-”

“No no no no, you don’t get it. Peter is not here, Quill and Strange and the others are not here, we need to get them back-” he said frantically, trying to push through the droves of people around them.

“Tony. Tony!” Rhodey yelled, stopping him. “Rockett is over there, and all of the Guardians seem to be here.” He explained, pointing at the group on the steps of a bank. When the engineer started to stumble towards them Rhodey stepped forward to help him, pushing gently but firmly at the multitude of humans that were still trying to get to their families and/or wanted to thank them. When they finally made it to the Guardians, Tony was panting, ashen and sweating; he had started to develop a fever.

“Rockett! Quill! Strange!” He yelled, desperate, climbing the stairs. The three males looked at him and took him in, wincing at his state. “Where’s Peter?” he asked, looking around, like he was expecting to find the boy hiding behind a potted plant or something.

“Peter is here, Man of Iron-” Drax started, when the Quill stepped forward and shushed them. He still had his arm around the green woman (Gamora, his mind supplied, daughter of Thanos, sacrifice for the Soul Stone). He didn’t pay her attention.

“I don’t know, Stark. He was just with us in the orange world, and then we started to disappear again and showed up here and we haven’t seen him since.”

Tony turned and started looking again, now that he had a higher ground he could see more and hoped the shine of the red and gold armor would catch his eye.

“Wait.” Rhodey said to them. “You’re Gamora, right? How come you’re not dead? I mean, I’m glad you are not, but Thanos killed you, didn’t he? To use the Soul Stone?”

“Yes, he did. But when you reversed the Snap, the Stone released me.” Gamora said, relieved. “I must thank you for that.”

“That’s good; and there’s no need, really. We did what we had to do.” Rhodey answered, still with an eye on his best friend. The adrenaline was starting to wear off and the pain would become unbearable soon enough. “But we are looking for Peter. Or Spider-Man. Can you remember anything else?”

“You were the last to talk to him, Strange. Did he said anything to you?” Gamora asked, taking in the worry in Starks’ face, the dead left arm dangling from his side and the sorrow in the wizard’s eyes.

Tony’s eyes found the doctor and he closed the distance between them, a bit of hope back in his eyes.

“You know where he is?” he asked, breathless. When the other man only swallowed, he went a little paler still. “Strange. Tell me! Do you know where he is?” he repeated, angry.

“I-” Strange started, but stopped and swallowed again. “I’m sorry.” he whispered, eyes full of pity.

“What-? Why? No, no, you all came back, why isn’t he here?” Tony demanded, voice hard. The wizard opened his mouth, but no words came out.

“The Stones, they...they demand a sacrifice, to use them.” Gamora answered, when the pause grew too long and Tony’s body started to tremble with fury and fear. “I was Thanos’ sacrifice and I think this boy was you-”

“No! No, that’s not possible. No no no no.” Tony denied, tears running down his face. “I never- I would never trade him-”

“It doesn’t matter. He was already in the Soul World. The Stone only prohibited his scape.” she said, voice tight.

A few curses could be heard from the rest of the Guardians, but Dr. Strange remained silent. The engineer’s knees gave out, and Rhodes’ was barely able to lower him gently to the floor before he fell and injured himself worse.

On his knees on the floor, Tony Stark sobbed. He wailed and whimpered, his right arm around his stomach, in a pantomime of a hug, offering no comfort at all. He kept mumbling Peter’s name, voice raw and small. Rhodey was paralyzed, completely lost. Not even after his parents’ deaths or Jarvis’ or JARVIS’ deaths (heck, not even after Siberia and finding out the truth about his mom’s murder) he had seen his best friend like that. He looked like a wounded animal, like if a well aimed blow could finally shatter him to pieces and scatter him through the winds.

The stairs were in complete silence, no one dared to say a word, everyone present witnessing the terrible distress and trying to pay their respects by not intruding.

“I’m sorry.”

The whisper was barely audible; and it took Tony a few seconds to find where it had come from. He realized it was Strange who said it when he saw his face: pity, sorrow and shame were plainly written all over him. It only took him another few seconds to make sense of the clues in front of him. He went still, and then he got up.

“You-” he coughed, then swallowed to give his parched throat enough moisture to form words. “You knew.” A hysterical laugh exploded from within him, and he threw his head back as the peals of laughter ended with tears running down his cheeks. He looked at Strange in the eyes to continue talking. “Of fucking course you knew. There was only one path in which we won, wasn't it? This one. The one you chose. The one you put in motion.”

“Stark-”

“You knew, since the moment you opened your eyes back in Titan that this would happen, didn’t you?”

“St-”

“You knew he would turn to ashes in front of me, you knew he would suffer and apologize because he couldn’t stop it and you knew I would do anything to reverse it.” His breathing became more and more agitated, his eyes became colder and angrier and his right hand shook as he continued to talk until his words turned into screams. ”You knew I would find a way to defeat Thanos and undo the Snap just to bring my kid back and that it would be completely useless because he would stay there, trapped forever and alone!”

“Tony-” when Rhodey tried to grab his shoulder he shook him off, not caring about anything but the man in front of him.

“Stark, I’m sorry, but it was the only way.” Despite the sorrow in his voice, the doctor didn’t lower his eyes, and they stayed resolute. His head was held high, and from his posture it was clear that he didn’t regret the decisions he made. And that he would make them again. “Trillions of lives were at stake-”

“You could’ve warned me!”

“And risk you making the wrong choice? Wait for you not to choose him? You would have tried to find another way, and there wasn’t one! He wasn’t worth it.”

“Wasn’t- wasn’t worth it?” he spat, before his right fist pummeled on the wizards’ face. The doctor was taken by surprise and ended on his back on the floor. Tony threw himself over him, knees pressing hard on his chest to not let him breath; and started hitting him again and again, right fist connecting with cheeks and teeth and nose and eyebrows. “You bastard!” fist “Piece of shit!” fist “I hate you, I hate you I HATE YOU!”

When Rhodey shook off his shock he jumped to grab his friend and lift him; but Tony just buried his knees deeper into the doctors’ chest, and kept throwing punch after punch. When Gamora joined Rhodes and they started to ease him back Tony grabbed Strange by the neck, holding onto his robes.

“I will end you!” he promised with a snarl on his face. The doctor smiled through his bloody teeth and lifted his shattered hands.

“What could you...do that is worse....than this was…?”he asked between blissful mouthfuls of air. Tony’s eyes gleamed as he dragged the doctor’s face even closer, until he was almost hissing on his ear.

“I will find each and every person you remotely care about and I will destroy them.” He swore, watching with glee as Strange’s already pale face became vaguely green. “I’ll tear them apart piece by piece, until they are turned to ashes, and I’ll make sure they know it’s your fault and hate you for it. And then I will watch as you crumble bit by bit, until you are nothing but dust in the wind.” With that, Tony threw Strange back to the floor with all the strength he had, relishing the sound the skull made when it hit the concrete. The last thing Tony saw before Rhodey injected him with sedatives was those blue eyes filled with the same terror he saw in Peter’s; and he closed his eyes knowing at least he wouldn’t be the only one having nightmares anymore.

---{}---

---{}---

---{}---

When Tony woke up he was in a hospital room. Probably somewhere in the city, not in the Compound, because he hated white walls on his properties. With a glance he took the room in. He noticed his missing left arm and the bandages around his torso and tight with little interest. Making sure he was alone, he lifted his hand and activated the nano-comm he had implanted in his ear.

“FRIDAY, my girl, are you there?”

“Yes, boss, of course. What do you want me to do?”

“I want you to wake up KAREN from her backup servers. We have a revenge to plan.”

“Done. And now?”

“Let’s start with Dr. Christine Palmer.”

[surveyyyys]

1. Do you believe in ghosts or evil spirits? Would you be willing to spend a night alone in a house that is supposedly haunted? LOL see, I don’t believe in ghosts or evil spirits even a little bit. But I’m not about to be one of those dumb white girls in the horror movies LOL I’m staying as far away from haunted houses as I possibly can 

2. Do you prefer being around men or women? Are most of your closest friends male or female? What do you think makes male friends different from female friends? I definitely prefer being around women. A lot of my friends are girls, and I feel a lot safer around girls -- I think I can understand them a lot more, and girls just have their shit together, you know? I’ve never met a man who has as much of a focus on his future as most of the women I know do. I also really hate women who put down other women by saying that they’re “bitchy” or “complicated” or anything like that... it just makes it okay for men to say those things about us. 

3. Describe the most enjoyable dream you can remember having. What made it so amazing? What about the worse nightmare you have ever had? What made it so terrible? Unfortunately I don’t remember the happiest dream I ever had LOL. Maybe it’ll come to me later. I did have a dream that I was drugged, and being raped/sexually assaulted though. That was definitely the most terrifying dream I’ve ever had. 

4. How would you react if you found out, after marrying someone, that your mate had been involved in a relationship with someone of the same sex prior to meeting you? Would this change the way you felt about that person? Why or why not?

Definitely not! As long as they’re still attracted to women (ex. they’re bi, pan, etc.) and they still love me, I wouldn’t have a problem with it at all. I mean, I would be a little uncomfortable the way anyone is when it comes to talking about their husband’s ex... but I don’t think the gender/sexuality of the ex would have any effect on it. 

5. How forgiving are you when one of your friends lets you down? Do you believe that everyone deserves a second chance? I am one of the least forgiving people, especially when someone does something to really hurt me. Honestly, I don’t even expect that much from my friends or from the people around me -- just don’t be blatantly rude, and don’t screw me over. I believe that if you can find it in you to be rude or to screw me over the first time, you can (and most likely will) definitely do it again. 

6. Do you think that advice from an older person carries a special weight because of their greater experience? Do you, as a young person, feel that your comments and advice have much effect on others? LOL I don’t think so. I’ve met plenty of older people who don’t know shit about shit. I definitely think it’s a part of my culture to respect older people because of their age/experience, but you definitely don’t have to listen to their advice. In fact, the advice that I took from older people often led me down the wrong path instead of the right one. 

7. How do you picture your funeral? Is it important for you to have people mourn your death, or would you rather them celebrate your life? What would you like said, and whom would you like to speak? How do you want to be remembered? Indian funerals are kind of structured so that people celebrate your life more than mourn your loss. It’s really loud and colorful and people’s spirits are kind of lifted even though it’s definitely still a really sad time for everyone. I don’t really like thinking about my own funeral and I don’t really see a point of thinking about it, since I’m never going to be there to see it. I don’t care how people remember me after I’m gone, actually, because it won’t have any effect on my life. I just hope that the people I care about are happy and that I’ve been a positive influence on them somehow. 

8. When you make a big sacrifice, do you tell others about it or keep it to yourself? Do you feel annoyed when your sacrifices aren’t noticed by others?

Lmao I’d like to think that I don’t ever mention it. But I’d probably talk about it a lot (not to the person I made the sacrifice for, but to someone else who I can be shitty around and not feel bad about it... most likely my sister LOL). I think it is annoying when my sacrifices aren’t noticed by others, but I’m not about to go up to that person and be like “NOTICE MY SACRIFICE” you know what I mean?

9. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be? When you have children, is there anything you will try to do differently than your own parents did? 

Oh man. LOL. Honestly, I don’t blame my parents for raising us the way they did. They both grew up really poor and they were the youngest of huge families. So they really didn’t have any money or any resources. So when they had kids, they made sure that we could have any materialistic good we wanted, and we would never feel poor. But sometimes they would replace other kinds of support with money. Like my dad will buy me all the textbooks in the world, but he never really sat down with me and helped me with my homework. I can buy all the clothes I want, but I can’t wear shorts or tank tops in my house. My parents paid for my college tuition (which is amazing of them), but they essentially squashed my dreams of becoming a journalist and continue to try to push me into generic corporate finance roles to this day. I think when I’m a parent, I’ll give my kids more room to develop socially and a little more freedom to make their own decisions. I also won’t let any racism/homophobia get in the way of their love lives the way my parents’ racism/homophobia gets in the way of mine. 

10. Do you believe in any sort of God? If not, do you think you might still pray if you were in a life-threatening situation? 

Nope. LOL most of the time I forget that religion is a thing. Honestly, life would be a lot easier to handle if I did believe in God. 

11. If you became aware that, without a doubt, your mother was having an affair, what would you do? What if your father were to mention that he was going crazy thinking your mother was cheating? Would you tell him? 

LOL this situation is so unrealistic I don’t even know how to respond to it. My mom, no matter how little she admits it, is ridiculously devoted to my dad. She would never cheat on him. I think that if she cheated on my dad she would have a damn good reason... I don’t think I would tell him? I don’t know...

12. When was the last time you had really mind-boggling, intensely satisfying sex?

LOL. Last summer. I had just gotten out of my first relationship and I was sleeping with this guy that I met on Tinder. We had really good chemistry in bed, and I think he was the best I ever had. But also, he was one of the first people I slept with while I was single. I don’t think the sex would’ve seemed that good if I had sex with him today (after I’ve been with other guys and I’ve understood sex a little more). But because I was so new to the concept of having sex with whoever I want whenever I want, the sex seemed amazing. 

13. If you knew that your child was going to be born severely mentally handicapped and would die by the age of 5, would you have an abortion? Do you think that there is ever a situation in which aborting a child actually helps to avoid suffering? Absolutely. There is no way I’m putting myself or my child through an ordeal like that. I would not bring someone into this world if I knew that they would live a horrible and extremely short life. If I’m having a baby, they have to be a healthy baby or I’m getting an abortion and finding another way to have a child. 

14. Would you rather be very much in love with one person and have no other friends, or have a large group of supportive and loving friends, but never find your “soulmate”? Large group of supporting friends! People blow “soulmates” and relationships out of proportion all the time, but it’s really only one small piece of your life. There are so many ways to be completely whole and live a fulfilled life without romantic love. There are actually so many other forms of love too: familial love, maternal love, self-love, love of life, the love that you have for your best friends... you don’t have to be in love with someone to be happy. 

15. Is there anything that you find too personal to discuss with others? LOL a few different things. 

16. How old were you when you first had sex? Was it what you imagined it would be? Is there anything anyone could have told you that would have made it better? Do you think you would be better off if you had waited longer to have sex? 

I was 17 when I lost my virginity -- I think that was actually the perfect age. I think it was basically what I expected LOL. The first time was pretty unsuccessful, but then we tried again the next morning and it was pretty great. I don’t think I needed to know anything to make the experience any better... I was really comfortable with the person I lost my virginity to, and I knew a lot about the theory of sex from listening to my sister’s many hookup stories. 

17. Are you good at taking compliments, or do you usually shrug it off and act like you didn’t deserve the compliment? 

I think I’m good at taking compliments! I always say thank you and I try to pay a compliment back. 

18. Are you someone who enjoys sleeping snuggled up with your significant other, or do you need space when you sleep? Nah I don’t need space when I sleep. I like cuddling. 

19. Have you ever lucid dreamed? Would you like to, or does the thought of being able to control your dreams scare you? LOL I remember, back when my sister was in high school she was really interested in the concept of lucid dreaming. But whenever she would try to lucid dream, she would end up having sleep paralysis. It was a really scary experience for her, so she stopped trying to lucid dream. I think I would be more afraid of the sleep paralysis side effect rather than of actually lucid dreaming itself. I also just don’t find the experience enriching or interesting enough to put myself through sleep paralysis for it. 

20. If you were guaranteed honest responses to 3 questions, who would you question, and what would you ask? 

I think I would ask a future version of myself these 3 questions:

1. Where am I actually going to be in 10 years? (in terms of family, career, relationships, friendships, etc.)

2. Am I ever going to be happy/satisfied with who I am, and if so, when am I going to reach that level?

3. Was 2016 really the best year of my life, or is the best still yet to come? (I would not want to know when the best year of my life is going to be... I just want to know if it’s still in my future.)

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Interview: Patrick Flores-Scott

Today we welcome Patrick Flores-Scott to the blog. He was kind enough to answer a few questions about his writing life and his newest novel, American Road Trip, which is making it's way out into the world today. I loved American Road Trip and reviewed it here last week.

Summary: A heartwrenching YA coming of age story about three siblings on a road trip in search of healing.

With a strong family, the best friend a guy could ask for, and a budding romance with the girl of his dreams, life shows promise for Teodoro “T” Avila. But he takes some hard hits the summer before senior year when his nearly perfect brother, Manny, returns from a tour in Iraq with a devastating case of PTSD. In a desperate effort to save Manny from himself and pull their family back together, T’s fiery sister, Xochitl, hoodwinks her brothers into a cathartic road trip.

Told through T’s honest voice, this is a candid exploration of mental illness, socioeconomic pressures, and the many inescapable highs and lows that come with growing up—including falling in love.

Have you had any memorable and/or life-changing road trips?

Definitely memorable. My parents drove us—me and my sisters—from our Seattle area home to Wisconsin for a reunion when we were all teenagers. Three hormonal teens squished in the back seat of a Ford Fairmont. Middle of Summer. Vinyl seats. No air conditioning. Two out of the three—mortal enemies. Seventeen hundred torturous miles. We camped the whole way. I definitely drew on that trip as I wrote the book.

I’ve actually been through all of the towns and most of the freeways and highways from American Road Trip. I taught in Los Angeles and would drive home to Seattle for the summer. And I also drove from L.A. to visit my sister and her family in El Paso, Texas a couple times.

I’d have to say that most of my road trips up and down the coast (including a trip to the Rose Bowl with friends in college) were as fast or faster than the trip in the book. It was always about getting there. I still feel that pace and those freeways in my bones. Although those experiences ended up being great for the writing, I’d love to do a slow, touristy version of a trip down the west coast with my wife and kids some day.

American Road Trip delves into the issues facing a family who is welcoming someone back after military service. Is this a situation you were familiar with or did it require a lot of research?

There are no vets in my family. I was inspired to start writing this story in 2009, after the housing bubble burst and the economy collapsed. I’m a big NPR listener and at that time there seemed to be so many stories about vets returning from Afghanistan and Iraq. Most of the stories focused on the difficulties of adjusting to civilian life and the tragedy of vet suicide and the treatment vets were receiving at the VA.

There was one story that really launched me into the book. It featured a mom reading a gut-wrenching letter her son wrote to her and his dad before he took his own life. I started researching and listening to all the stories I could. Early on I also was moved by this short movie, Poster Girl. It showed a young vet suffering from PTSD. The thing that got to me—besides watching her battle against the overwhelming demons that followed her back from war—was her support network. This small group of older vets took her in. They counseled her and accompanied her to VA appointments and really seemed to be keeping her alive. Those real-life vets inspired Tio Ed and “The Group” in American Road Trip.

There was a lot of digging through stories online and websites where vets would share their stories, often in search of support and camaraderie. Same with websites for families attempting to find resources to help them cope. I talked to vets and family members and with some folks who work at the VA. My father-in-law is a psychiatrist who has had a lot of experience working with vets so he was a big help as well. I worked on the book for a long time, but there were changes made, even at the last minute, because of feedback I received regarding vets and their care. It was important for me to get that aspect of the story right.

The portion of the experience Manny’s family went through when he came back from war that I connect to personally, is that of being a kid experiencing a family member dealing with mental illness. I feel that in my gut. Also, even though no one dies in the book, the threat of loss hangs over the story like a dark cloud. Much of the time I was writing the book, I was dealing with grief brought on by loss in my family.  So a lot of very real, very strong emotion collided with—and became entwined with—all the new information I was taking in about vets and their families.

I also brought to the writing a profound belief that sending a person to war—whether they go willingly, or not—is the biggest sacrifice you could ask an individual to make, and sending a loved one off to war is the biggest sacrifice you could ask a family to make. So as long as we’re a country that chooses to send people to war, we owe it to them and to our whole society, to meet them with an overwhelming amount of easily accessible care, from the time they return home, for as long as they require it.

I love that you focus on sibling relationships and even go way beyond the nuclear family. How did so many family members become part of this story?

Teodoro is the protagonist. But for some reason, from the very beginning I envisioned Xochitl, the sister, being the person who activates the road trip. She was always the one who believed that Manny—who returned from war unmoored and adrift—could find his bearings via a reconnection to long-lost family. That’s no cure for PTSD, but in the story those re-connections do lead to support that is meaningful for everyone.

Also, at one point, the book was going to be, in part, about the role repeated stories and lore play in unifying families. I made up Avila family stories and wrote them in this heightened style, my attempt at magical realism, and I spread them throughout the novel. Each time I wrote one, it seemed to expand the world of the Avila family. When it became clear that the stories were just too much and I had to nix them, some of the characters from those stories found their way back into the novel. Even some of the stories found their way back in, but in a style that fit the rest of the book.  

Xochitl was a new name for me, but I was happy to find someone online who made a video about her name. It is really beautiful in both sound and meaning. Do you know someone named Xochitl or was this just a random pick related to the family history and culture?

I had a student named Xochitl and I really loved that name. My wife, Emma, picked Xochitl for her confirmation name. You’re supposed to pick a Catholic saint’s name, but she went with Aztec instead. (I think it’s so cool that she did that.) It means ‘flower,’ which is sweet, but the written name looks so strong on the page. I wanted to Xochitl, the character to be STRONG. She needed a name that looked and sounded strong. You say, SOE-cheel. A teacher friend told me she had a student who gave up trying to get folks to pronounce it correctly, so she told everyone, “I am so chill.” Doesn’t quite have the same umph.

The book used to start with Xochitl coercing the guys into the car for the road trip and T describing his sister’s name, telling the reader the pronunciation and saying how that name that starts with an X looks as crazy as his sister is. It was fun writing but eventually it didn’t fit and I’m fine making the reader do a little work to find out how it’s pronounced.

Since writing the book, I came to learn that there is a singer-songwriter, Xochitl, out of Sacramento. She is great. Check her out on Youtube. And Xochitl Torres-Small is now running for Congress in New Mexico. Send her your support, people!

Xochitls are coming on strong. Very soon everyone will know exactly how to pronounce that name.

Change can be a challenge at any time in life even when it doesn't involve trauma. You've made a geographical move and a switch in careers recently. What have you learned about yourself through these shifts?

Wow. It’s been four years since I quit teaching and we moved to Ann Arbor for my wife’s job at the University of Michigan, and I’m still learning. I’ve learned that I need to get out and be social. I have a great and loving little family. But I need to reach out more often to the many people who have opened their arms to us since our move to Ann Arbor. I’ve learned that being a writer and stay-at-home dad seemed to really work for me when my youngest son was in preschool half day. Now that he’s in Kindergarten, it’s a long day and I get stir crazy and I’m feeling like I need to get back to a half day teaching job—mostly for social reasons (but also for added income until this writing thing takes off). I’ve learned that I really need a network of writing friends—and I’m SO LUCKY to have eventually found them here. Don’t tell the whole world, but Ann Arbor is a phenomenal town for connecting with writers.

Do you have a special connection to amazing green chile cheeseburgers?

My wife is from Las Cruces, New Mexico. We go down there with our boys twice a year. About ten years ago, my in-laws took my wife and me to the town of Hatch, and to Sparky’s restaurant, the barbecue and burgers place I write about in the book. That first Sparky’s cheeseburger is what started my addiction to green chile, and specifically, to green chile cheeseburgers. I recommend that everyone travel to New Mexico and eat their way through that state. Enchiladas, gorditas, green chile stew. The use of local chile, green and red, makes it a unique and transcendent regional dining experience. My mouth is watering as I write this. If anything, I undersold the glory of New Mexican green chile—and New Mexican cuisine—in the book. It’s amazing, but you have to go there to experience the real thing.