#even if you paid
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"There's only one bed"
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Who takes the bed
Dio
Kars
Rohan
Abbacchio & Trish
Illuso
Diego
Jobin
Who sleeps in the cuck chair
Kakyoin & Avdol
Koichi
Bruno
Pesci
Weather Report
Joshu
Who shares the bed
Joeseph & Caesar
Polnareff
Josuke & Okuyasu
Mista & Narancia
Risotto & Formaggio
Jolyne, Hermes & Pucci
Johnny & Gyro
Yasuho
Who gets another bed/another room
Jonathan
Jotaro
Kira
Giorno, Fugo & Diavolo
Prosciutto
Hot Pants & Funny Valentine
Norisuke
Who gets under the bed
Melone
Anasui & F.F
Gappy
#Cuck-yoin#Dio would take it and tell you to get out#even if you paid#Cant put Jonathan in a there's only one bed situation He would be like No we shan't It would be improper Goodnight and just leave#jojo#jjba imagines#jojo imagines#jojo brainrot#jjba brainrot#part 1-9
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Oh…. Well, it’s over for Crunchyroll I guess
#Crunchyroll#piracy#funimation#money hungry ass streaming service#rambling#I’ve never paid for a streaming service in my life thank god#I appreciated using others accounts but I personally cannot see myself paying this much for a service if I had the funds 😭!#get back to pirating kings!!!#anime has always been one of the easiest forms of media to pirate anyway so y’all got this#CR is definitely not worth paying for though#CR is certainly not worth paying this much for even if it’s a yearly one time fee#capitalism#the fact that CR has always had pretty bad quality as a streaming service anyway#it buffers every time you pause or rewind anything
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The leftism/anticapitalism leaving people's bodies the zeptosecond you imply that disabled people who aren't "productive" still matter in society and need to be treated like intrinsic equals who have a place in this world:
#disability#disability advocacy#described images#image description in alt#ableism#ableism tw#my full-time job is my disability and you're lucky that i am still 'productive' as-is#your boss doesn't care that you think you're superior for being hired by them. they're still going to treat you like profit machines#it astounds me how people will capitulate for oppression because they place their intrinsic value in their ability to be at the top...#...or at least 'at the top' compared to others. it's the same impulse that makes people think their cisgender status makes them superior...#...you are placing your worth into systems which not only oppress others but offer you no true sense of worth...#...ESPECIALLY if you're also being exploited (even if just a bit)...#...you have a job sure but... do you actually get treated like a human being? are you actually paid? are you actually safe?...#...if the answer to any of those questions and more is 'no' then why do you place your value in capitalistic production. genuinely.#and why would you DEMAND disabled people to have the same exploitation you experience. why do you DEMAND productivity if you are proletaria#yes being a leftist and anticapitalist are linked but. some people still internalize capitalism without questioning it#being a leftist is about challenging that rather than assuming you're correct i think#also scientists were very silly when describing time that's like. less than a millisecond i think
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ok look i love astarion with my whole soul and this might be an unpopular opinion but post-brain, i don’t think he’s fashionable. i think he knows how to dress well and likes wearing nice clothes but i really feel like 90% of the time when he’s at home he would just want to be comfortable. i think this man wears dad slippers and owns an ungodly amount of sweaters and comfy loungewear. furthermore i would like to put forward that the person who DOES put together a fucking Look every single day of his life is wyll fucking ravengard. in this essay i will
#ramble#bg3#baldur's gate 3#astarion#wyll ravengard#wyll was a noble do you think he doesn’t know how to dress??#after he and karlach get out of avernus he has the highest paid tailor in faerun#i just picture him like that guy who styles outfits based on fonts#like idk what this garment even is but somehow you’re making it work#wyll has to be the hottest person at the fantasy grocery store it isn’t a want it’s a need#astarion is just like the average alternative person where we get dressed once a week and the rest is just pyjama#i think he appreciates getting to dress up a bit for fun things but like#after centuries of having to scrub up and look pretty to lure people in. he deserves a rest
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I think 90% of my gripes with how modern anime looks comes down to flat color design/palettes.
Non-cohesive, washed-out color palettes can destroy lineart quality. I see this all the time when comparing an anime's lineart/layout to its colored/post-processed final product and it's heartbreaking. Compare this pre-color vs. final frame from Dungeon Meshi's OP.
So much sharpness and detail and weight gets washed out and flattened by 'meh' color design. I LOVE the flow and thickness and shadows in the fabrics on the left. The white against pastel really brings it out. Check out all the detail in their hair, the highlights in Rin's, the different hues to denote hair color, the blue tint in the clothes' shadows, and how all of that just gets... lost. It works, but it's not particularly good and does a disservice to the line-artist.
I'm using Dungeon Meshi as an example not because it's bad, I'm just especially disappointed because this is Studio Trigger we're talking about. The character animation is fantastic, but the color design is usually much more exciting. We're not seeing Trigger at their full potential, so I'm focusing on them.
Here's a very quick and messy color correct. Not meant to be taken seriously, just to provide comparison to see why colors can feel "washed out." Top is edit, bottom is original.
You can really see how desaturated and "white fluorescent lighting" the original color palettes are.
[Remember: the easiest way to make your colors more lively is to choose a warm or cool tint. From there, you can play around with bringing out complementary colors for a cohesive palette (I warmed Marcille's skintone and hair but made sure to bring out her deep blue clothes). Avoid using too many blend mode layers; hand-picking colors will really help you build your innate color sense and find a color style. Try using saturated colors in unexpected places! If you're coloring a night scene, try using deep blues or greens or magentas. You see these deep colors used all the time in older anime because they couldn't rely on a lightness scale to make colors darker, they had to use darker paints with specific hues. Don't overthink it, simpler is better!]
#not art#dungeon meshi#rant#i'm someone who can get obsessive over colors in my own art#will stare at the screen adjusting hues/saturation for hours#luckily i've gotten faster at color picking#but yeah modern anime's color design is saddening to me. the general trend leans towards white/grey desaturated palettes#simply because they're easier to pick digitally#this is not the colorists fault mind you. the anime industry's problems are also labor problems. artists are severely underpaid#and overworked. colorists literally aren't paid enough to do their best#there isn't a “creative drought” in the anime industry. this trend is widespread across studios purely BECAUSE it's not up to individuals#until work conditions improve anime will unfortunately continue to miss its fullest potential visually#don't even GET ME STARTED ON THE USE OF POST-PROCESSING FILTERS AND LIGHTING IN ANIME THOUGH#SOMEONE HOLD ME BACK. I HATE LENS FLARES I HATE GRADIENT SHADING I HATE CHROMATIC ABBERATION AND BLUR
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I tried to draw sheep Machete and goat Vasco (but I am not good at drawing goats, at all)
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#Macsheep and Goatsco#what do you mean I LOVE goat Vasco#the ears! the hejazi goat ears!#and his expression is just *chef's kiss* perfect#really captures that ungovernable goatlike glee#I like how he retained his smooth coat and sleek and curved shapes#and Machete looks very appropriate as a sheep as well#he would have even more reason to trim his neck wool as a sheep#come to think of it would he have to keep himself sheared at all times if he wanted his clothes to fit correctly?#and just keep the head fluff#I noticed that you paid attention to their snout shapes! sheep have kind of rabbitlike nose whereas goats have a smoother upper lip#with less prominent philtrum#I thought that was such a cool detail#something I often forget myself when I'm drawing these species#thank you!#gift art#arttsuka#Machete#Vasco#it's weird how much harder their expressions are to read solely because of the horizontal pupils#they're mammalian but lack that anthropomorphic familiarity I guess
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tbh I don’t think therapy would have fixed Jayce and Viktor lmao. maybe would have softened their self-destructive tendencies but there’s no fixing that co-dependent relationship. Heimerdinger Mel and Sky are told “yeah, I can help treat their individual depressions but nothing is gonna reduce their co-dependency. I’m pretty sure separating them makes it a lot worse for not only them but much worse for everyone else. for everyone’s safety I suggest they’re not allowed to be more than a buildings length away from each other and even that is pushing it.” That therapist then quits on the spot cause now they’ve literally seen everything.
It’s like that scene in Brooklyn nine nine where all the physiatrists are observing and talking with Gina but instead it’s a whole crew of therapists and neurologists and physiologists trying to find out how these two men literally mind-melded together. They go to couples therapy but it’s literally just individual therapy held together because why tf not it’s the only way to get them to go.
#in therapy like well Viktor doesn’t sleep well and I think it’s because he keeps dreaming about that time when he was 12 and got sick#the therapist is like well does Viktor tell you this and Viktor is like no I didn’t tell him that recently but that is why I can’t sleep#this is how their therapy is paid for btw that team dealing with them is getting research papers and grants and funding#their award winning paper is about codependency and the end of the world and shit#one therapist suggests they spend a few days apart and the next time they come back talk about it#and all those two can do is just info dump to each other about random shit they did and thought about while they were apart#they didn’t even do the same things but for some reason complete each others sentences#the therapist is like how did you know????? and they’re like well it’s so obvious what he did while I was away#and it’s just science and science and science#that therapists just quits and leaves Piltover#gets tf away from those two#arcane#arcane spoilers#viktor arcane#jayce talis#jayvik#jayce was like well last time I was separated from Viktor he almost died and the second time I teamed up with a random girl and killed a ki#Viktor is like no way last time we were separated I experimented on myself with runes shimmer and the hexcore#AU sky doesn’t die btw#and they’re just like lmao oops too bad you weren’t there you probably would have stopped me#honestly they should have been exiled with the caveat they have to go together#these two get handcuffed together and their only problem is that it’s now harder to work in the lab
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via: Daniel Ricciardo from The Dan Diaries: I'm asking the questions … (Japanese GP 2017 review)
#I kinda love how even the most random little factoid of information like Daniel's recollection here about Max#just shows you how much they paid attention to each other and cared and even noticed things about each other that the other#person might not even be aware of. something very wholesome and domestic about it all#also#daniel “i'm not superstitious but must shave to pornstache for every race post-mexico 2023” ricciardo calling seb out for superstitions?!#daniel ricciardo#maxiel
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whenever Andrew or Neil are talking about Kevin to the other they refer to him as "your boytoy"
#Neil to Andrew at the end of trk: don't worry. I'll keep your boytoy safe for you until you get back#Kevin: 🧍#this is even better in a kandreil exclusive way#like Kevin is not romantically involved but they use it totally seriously and casually#lmao it gets to the point where Kevin will respond to it. like hell lift his head up when he hears it bc he knows they're talking about him#LMAO all I can think now is Coach seeing this and being like I do NOT get paid enough for this shit#neil josten#andrew minyard#kevin day#aftg#mine aftg
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Don't mind me, just slacking on a big Billford comic by making other far more ridiculous Billford comics and also some AU art (please excuse my slapdash human!Bill thank you please, also before anyone asks the art style is messy and all over the place because idgaf LOL)
This started out as an excuse to design a Bill Cipher-inspired "wedding" dress, but then spiraled wildly out of control. Various rambles and a bunch more human!Bill arts under the cut, including another silly little comic at the end! (Feel free to skip the rambles, I won't be offended. I know I'm bad at shutting up. XD)
I may or may not write some comedy stuff for this AU, which I'm calling 'For Better Or Worse (But Mostly Worse)'. While Ford DOES remember getting sloshed enough for one thing to lead to making out with another after karaoke, neither he nor Bill remember this wedding, At All. The Love God did nothing to dissuade them from going hog wild on their marriage spending, either, so it got...uh. Exorbitantly Expensive. As in, the grand total could probably buy the entire fucking MOON sort of expensive. (It's fine, don't worry, Bill's good enough at crime to be able to afford it.) Also, because the logic of this AU is mostly dictated by Rule of Funny, the Love God's powers are close to unlimited when it comes to matters of romance, but ONLY when it comes to matters of romance. (Like weddings!)
Want an empty human vessel to smash the soul of a triangle into for date nights or when it's convenient, or perhaps even when it's NOT convenient? Easy peasy! Want the marriage to be recognized in every corner of the multiverse from now until the end of time, thus making any potential future divorce nigh-on impossible? Can do! Want to buy an entire beach for the ceremony and honeymoon and in general, and totally not at all because it would be Super Hilarious to prevent any specific movies from being made on that very same beach in the future? Fine, whatever, it's not his finances he's ruining!
Does the Love God also provide special rings that just so happen to turn incorporeal as long as the "happy couple" doesn't remember that they barged into his dreams to bully him into presiding over their marriage? ...No comment!
He spends the next thirty years trying and failing to get in touch with either of them for payment. This is why you should always demand half the money up front, my guy!
Also it's absolutely a traditional Jewish wedding, because I like the idea of Bill demanding all the keepsakes from the marriage that he paid for, and being completely confused when one of the things he's handed is a fancy container full of broken glass. He gets it later, but in the moment, he thinks the Love God is just fucking with him some more.
Ramble over! Here's the full dress that caused the comic to happen, along with what Ford wound up wearing at the wedding (and begrudgingly agreeing to put on again later for Reasons), aaaaand also a close-up of Bill's ring:
I may have forgotten to draw Bill's hair floofier when drawing the back of the dress, lmao
Since double ring ceremonies have been leaking over into Jewish wedding customs for a while now, Ford also has a ring, but his is the much more traditional plain gold band. There's definitely a message engraved on the inside - embarrassing, cringe, or incriminating somehow - but I haven't decided what it is yet, so use your imagination for now. XD Bill, on the other hand, saw the phrase 'traditional plain gold band' and said "No Thank You" before proceeding to embellish his ring to his liking. And because he's a secret sap who adores Ford's extra fingers, the triangle points add up to twelve, as do the engraved stars. Yes, they're stars, not dots, I just got lazy. There's also six lashes on the eye gem, and probably an eye engraving on the inside with another six lashes. (Bill's got it BAD, okay? We all know this.)
Here are the initial scribbles of Bill's custom vessel in more casual attire, please ignore the wonky anatomy and the fact that I flat out refuse to ever draw him with a proper top hat:
He does actually need a cane in this vessel; since Bill tends to possess men and especially Ford more often than not, he's used to having a higher center of gravity when in a human body, so his ability to balance is pretty garbage. (He may or may not topple over with concerning regularity.) As for his empty eye socket, his bangs don't do much to hide it since he's so high-energy (dude is constantly on the move), and he also refuses to wear a patch over it, because 1.) why bother, and 2.) it's more fun to freak people out.
To better align with Ford's attraction towards the strange, the vessel was designed with super minor shapeshifting ability - Bill can look like a perfectly normal human, but he can also make the teeth and fingers sharper whenever he likes (which is mostly just when he's angry or being more of a menace than usual), as well as slit down the pupils or outright ditch the irises altogether. He can also have whatever he wants in the downstairs department, just because I'm an indecisive bitch on that front, lmao. Maybe he can have boobs if he wants them, too, but I ain't drawin' tits on no triangle, nuh-uh, no sir. His powers are otherwise limited down to what humans can do, because for some reason, the Love God doesn't trust Bill to not snap into Immediate Apocalypse Mode if he's given a physical form that's actually all his and no one else's.
Due to the body being all his and no one else's, it's also not really a standard possession so much as it is just...Bill being temporarily human. He's a lot more aware of and in tune with his human body's senses than he ever was with his "puppets", which makes things like pain a lot more intense. (He is mostly fine with this, because he's a fukken masochist.)
A bit more fashion stuff, including beach and party attire~
The beach outfit was mostly me trying and failing to nail down his body shape, which is still not bottom-heavy enough. I then decided to slap a bikini on it, before making it supremely unsexy with a pair of fugly shorts, because Bill's fashion choices are not allowed to be conventionally attractive. Meanwhile, the party outfit was mostly me looking at the casual attire I designed, asking 'how would Bill make this Worse', and then drawing the result. The mismatched thigh-highs are killing me inside! :D
No, his vessel can't actually summon fire, I just drew it for funzies before I decided on said vessel's limitations. Yes, the gold brick tattoos are absolutely a reference to the fic 'Knowing Me, Knowing You' - I simply could not resist.
I also HAD to draw Bill in one of his canonical(?) shirts, just made tank-top'd:
He is absolutely about to over-correct and fall backwards after this. USE YOUR CANE, GOOFBALL!!! (I meant to draw Bill closer to this degree of bottom-heavy in the other images, but. Alas. I am bad at anatomy, LOL)
And, last but not least before More Comic Time, I attempted to draw him closer to Gravity Falls style:
Jury's out on whether or not I succeeded, but - hey. I tried. Now have some Handyman Bill AU, but with my goofy human design, instead:
Hey, it's a 'mystery snack', and the guy wanted A BITE to eat - the joke was right there, guys!!! (Based on this post, because it just screamed BILL CIPHER to me.)
whoops i forgor bills ring and cracks ahaha too late now
I WILL SHUT UP AND STOP RAMBLING NOW K THX BYYYYYE
#fanart#gravity falls#billford#bill cipher#stanford pines#stanley pines#the love god#human bill cipher#human bill design#fashion design#comics#poor stan gets to find out his twin boinked a triangle when the love god shows up at the mystery shack demanding payment LMAO#cue internal panic for stan as dipper and mabel lose their collective shit over the fact that they now have a surprise new grunkle bill#the love god helps himself get paid by teaching the kids how to trap bill in his human vessel for the foreseeable future#bill is bewildered and pissed but also very much 'holy shit i have a FAMILY again??? neat but terrifying??????? what the F*CK do i do now'#he then proceeds to attempt to lovebomb his new family into being okay with the impending apocalypse#all while the three of them attempt to lovebomb HIM into giving up his plans for said impending apocalypse#then two days later ford shows up and is just like. what the ACTUAL F*CK IS HAPPENING???#cue stan immediately screaming 'I HAD TO PRETEND TO BE THAT THING'S HUSBAND FOR TWO DAYS STRAIGHT SO F*CK YOU AND YOUR BAD TASTE FOR THAT!'#stan spends those two days straight dropping very sour hints that he's being punished for someone else's terrible mistakes#bill finds this absolutely hilarious and thus plays along - but not without dropping his own hints that ford is the FAR superior twin#dipper and mabel have ZERO idea of what is actually going on because the love god did NOTHING to clarify the situation#dipper is convinced that stan and bill are speaking in some kind of bizarre code that only adults can understand#mabel is convinced that the code is flirting - which means stan and bill are going to live happily ever after and have tons of kids + pets#NEITHER of them are prepared for ford showing up. not that they were in canon. but still. now it's even MORE crazy#'what do you mean we get TWO NEW GRUNKLES???' 'two grunkles in two days - gotta be some kinda record'#ford then has to decide if he wants to remain justifiably furious at bill or join the other pines in lovebombing him into submission#he then gets to learn that lovebombing bill works surprisingly well because that triangle is just The Biggest Attention Wh*re#the entire AU would just be ridiculous antics with a splash of billford#these tags are an abomination lmao
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Mikey and Leo episode centered around Mikey wanting to push Leo and Draxum together since Leo’s the most reluctant to give Draxum any grace (for good reason!) But, thinking on the spot, Leo says he’s gotta go do something for Hueso and “just can’t hang out right now 😔” (yes, he says the emoji out loud.)
Mikey calls his bluff and now the three of them (Mikey having grabbed a weary Draxum along) go to Hueso’s to find that yes, he actually does have a job for him. Said job asks for Leo to go with Hueso to deliver multiple pizzas to this giant yokai quite a distance away, and Hueso figured it would probably go better with Leo’s help (emphasis on probably.)
Well, Mikey decides that this would be a great bonding opportunity for them and basically invites he and Draxum along. Unfortunately for Leo, Hueso doesn’t care enough to wave away more help, though he does side-eye the wanted criminal Baron Draxum coming with them. But who is he to judge? (This choice has consequences.)
The journey goes about as terribly as you’d expect, but at least the pizzas get delivered on time.
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt mikey#rottmnt leo#rottmnt draxum#rottmnt hueso#listen you don’t understand#imagine mikey trying to get leo to accept draxum as a father figure only for this to push leo to purposefully turn to Hueso instead#idk I love when this accidental flaw of Mikey’s is explored and I think it meshes well with Leo’s own AND fits nicely with their dynamic#100% this ends with Leo & Hueso bonding and Mikey & Draxum bonding and Mikey & Leo bonding and even Hueso & Mikey a bit#but notably only a little Draxum & Leo - because it’s important that Leo isn’t forced to accept him imo#Leo realizing during all his denials of Draxum that oh you know who he DOES think of as family? Hueso#Draxum is trying mainly for Mikey’s sake#Hueso is too tired to care about all this family drama but is reluctantly worried about Pepino#Mikey just wants one big happy family because - that’s just easier y’know?#he tries so hard to work with everyone’s emotions that he just wants things to be easy for once#he wants love and family to be easier than it is - than has BEEN lately#gimme that heart to heart Mikey & Leo moment in this regard#by the end Leo DOES raise Draxum up a bit from ‘complete distrust’ to ‘mild side-eye’#but it’s a long ways off if he ever gets pushed into the family tier#and also#SO MUCH SLAPSTICK COMEDY and sarcastic comedy in this episode fr#and if you’re wondering-#yes they DO fight the Yokai monster they’re delivering the pizzas to#but they get paid so it’s whatever#kinda wanna attempt to copy the style of the show and make fake screenshots of this ‘episode’ ngl
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Okay if you haven't yet, and you have Netflix/Paramount+, consider giving "School Spirits" a chance.
It looks like a silly little cheesy teenage ghosts show, I put it on for background noise, and then got totally engrossed in the mystery. It's VERY well written, very well filmed, the mystery was GREAT and the payoff at the end is also great.
One of the things majorly lacking in shows I've recently tried to watch is that they try to do a twist/reveal at the end that comes out of nowhere. They don't want you to guess what they're doing. This show doesn't do that. This show wants you to guess. They give you seven different mysteries and enough clues to guess (most of) what is going on, so that when you get the final puzzle piece to any given mystery, it feels GREAT.
The story premise is this: a teenager in hs wakes up as a ghost in the hs, and doesn't remember how she died, and with the help of the other ghosts, tries to solve the mystery of her own death.
Simple premise. BEAUTIFULLY executed. Not all of the questions that arise get answered, but the main one (what she doesn't remember) gets solved by the end of the season, leaving the "why/how and what comes next" to be carried to the next season. It does a cliffhanger RIGHT. But now I desperately want to see the second season (which I believe has been approved, so it's a matter of waiting).
So pretty please, if you're looking for something to do and a great, engaging lil mystery to watch, consider! School Spirits!!
#school spirits#there is so much in this show#Spike and I finished watching it today#her for the first time me for the second#and the second time through it was even better because I was picking up the right threads#the first time through there are SO MANY CLUES#but there are also SO MANY MYSTERIES that you aren't sure which clues belong to which mystery#and then the last half of the last ep hits#and dumps out all the final puzzle pieces to several mysteries#and we spent like an hour digging through thoughts afterword#pulling out themes and clues#and there are some potentially REALLY CLEVER things done#and actually they 100% followed through on the things they set forth and paid off so far#so I feel pretty confident some of the things we pieced together actually belong to the puzzle#and aren't just mistakes#or coincidences#and it's been so long since I got to see actually good writing STAY good writing through#I'm so stoked for this series
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Brienne said, "I remember a woman... she came from some place across the narrow sea. I could not even say what language she sang in, but her voice was as lovely as she was. She had eyes the color of plums and her waist was so tiny my father could put his hands around it. His hands were almost as big as mine." She closed her long, thick fingers, as if to hide them. "Did you sing for your father?" Catelyn asked. Brienne shook her head, staring down at her trencher as if to find some answer in the gravy. "For Lord Renly?" The girl reddened. "Never, I... his fool, he made cruel japes sometimes, and I..." "Some day you must sing for me."
#asoiaf#asoiaf fanart#catelyn stark#catelyn tully#brienne of tarth#my drawings#acok#love them. and also#FOOD#rewatching my fav show about historical food over and over again paid off i guess#anyway it's the biggest snow storm over here you can't even go to work#no need to wait for the windsof winter they are HERE. walking the dogs was an ordeal#now i know how campstannis felt in adwd.... ok i'll stop it with the unnecessary referencing. anyway happy new year!
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"is someone who makes 100k usd a year rich" "at which point do you start considering someone rich (usd salaries)" "how much money do you make yearly (in usd)". pay my country's external debt or kill yourself
#i can't even conceive what amounts of money are we talking here like you are straight up living in a different universe than me#if you make 500 usd a month. if you get paid in usd at all#chizitxt
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This is such a funny thing for a “news” site that makes you pay for articles to post
#you can’t even make this shit up lol#ceo gunman#united healthcare#New York times#payed news#paid news#paid journalism#nyc#uhc ceo#uhc shooter#free journalism#luigi mangione
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gojo would kill your work husband. but if he were the work husband, that's a different story
REAL!! he’s such a hypocrite because if someone mentioned you had a work husband, his entire world would stop and he wold devise the absolute worst plans to make sure that your co-worker, everyone at your job, and everyone in the next building over knew that he was happily committed to you
but if he is the work husband, he’s very........ dutiful in his role. there’s a loose office/lawyer au in my head where satoru is your secretary, and for all intents and purposes, your personal assistant, and he’s good at his job, but mostly because he considers his job to be pleasing you. he has coffee for you when you arrive, he moves your schedule around without you asking, he has answers to questions before you can even ask them, he has fresh flowers on your desk weekly, pokes into your meetings to pretend to hand you a file that’s really just maybe a single document in a manilla folder with candy on top of it—he’s made himself your business, your partner; he’s made himself irreplaceable, and he loves to remind everybody of that fact.
he’s also extremely loyal. sure, he could day a week’s worth of work done in about a day, but that doesn’t mean he’ll just use his talents for anybody. he’s your secretary, so he’s at your beck and call, and everyone knows it. they know he’s the best, but also that he’s off limits—not because you won’t share him, but because satoru won’t let himself be shared.
he also extends his duties beyond work, of course. when he hands you a print out of your schedule for the day and you’re confused by the three-hour block of time you have in the middle of the day, satoru just helps you shrug your coat of your shoulders and smiles, “that’s for the lunch date you have with me, of course!” hanging up your coat in your closet for you, “i’m paying, see you soon, sweets.” and because you’re great at your job, and satoru helps you be great, nobody really questions when the two of you have time for a 13-course tasting menu at 1pm on a tuesday afternoon. and if they did, all satoru would say that you two had a lovely date
#anonymous#he's like donna from suits but worse because he's like if harvey were donna LOL#i have soooooo much to say about him#he doesn't really Have to work he's a nepotism baby supreme#but he met you maybe in undergrad? and he's been obsessed w you since#he knows youre a workaholic so he's dutifully sat by your side all these years through college through grad/professional school#and when you told him you got to hire your own assistant he was the very first applicant#because getting paid to spend his days with you and take care of you? he was already doing that for free might as well make it official#everyone in the office knows satoru loves you except you honestly#he probably has his own masters/JD but elects to be your assistant anyway bc that's so much more fun#what he Really wants to be a househusband but first he's gotta ask you out and propose and all that good stuff (cue him rolling his eyes#and going on about formalities and boring systems and blah blah blah)#also in the office au in my head: nanami (also senior partner) higuruma ofc <3 beloved (managing partner) and TOJI!#WALK WITH ME!#its honestly probably satoru's influence that gets toji into law... as someone who so feverently broke it in the past#idk maybe there's a megumi situation that makes gojo be like yk if ur this good at skirting/breaking the law youd probably be half decent#at enforcing it... or at least helping other people get around it too#and so lawyer toji is born#does he screw around w the rich people who r stupid w their money? absolutely#but you nanami and higuruma just let it be bc he brings in those settlements better than anybody else....#hmmm... i kinda wanna make megumi somebody's associate but also..... yuuta.....#i think i just like sticking yuuta in a tie if im being real#but anyway... satoru is your Work Husband and everyone knows he wants to be your real husband#but they just let it slide bc rumour has it even tho hes just a secretary hes got equity in the firm?? and besides that his heart eyes give#away his hopeless devotion from a mile away#the day you actually start seeing somebody outside of work... oh theyre in for Trouble#satoru x reader#him dragging you out of ur office late at night and u protesting so he just. puts u over his shoulder#and ur telling him to let u down but he's insisting u go home and then nanami pops out of his office#and ur like wait nanami this isnt what it looks like but he's so dead in the eyes when he just sighs
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