#even hidan knows what it is...

[zombie-honeymoon]

Summary:

Hidan wants to have a pity party at home after getting dumped, and Deidara makes the mistake of inviting him to his art class. It goes about as well as anyone would expect, and to top it off, Hidan discovers some drawings that Deidara would have preferred to stay secret...

[lecliss]

I want to watch Naruto but I don't want to start from the beginning.

[skania]

I gotta say, Sumire is an anomaly. Kishi is actually allowing this girl to keep a clear-head at all times, to figure shit out faster than Shikamaru, to ask the right questions and say the right things all while remaining emphatic and emotionally mature.

If it weren't because he still doesn't let her in on the action, I'd suspect he isn't the one writing her lmao

[kaedeisreal]

😐

[or0ch1maru]

Think you’re funny huh?

Content: 18+, rough sex, jealous & possessive ideations mentioned, breeding kink, porn, literal porn

•

He pounds into you at a relentless pace, his tip kissing your cervix with every thrust, pulling broken mewls and whines from your pretty lips. How you ended up in this position, face mushed into the carpet, with your boyfriends large hands holding your hips firmly as he abuses your poor little cunny, is because when he picked you up from work, a mere thirty minutes ago was because he witnessed you speaking with a male coworker. You know of your lovers jealousy, and yes, there’s been times where you go out of your way to taunt him a little. Your goal being to be bent over any surface as he splits you in two.

But this evening was truly by accident, not that you’re complaining. Your mindless babbling turning into choked moans as one of his hands snake around your waist, coming to a stop around your neck, pulling you flush against his chest. This new angle allowing him to get even deeper. A bulge in your belly visible from the sheer size of him, being so deep.

“Think you’re so fucking funny huh? Talking to him right in front ‘f me.”

He taunts you, his thrusts turning sloppy as he feels his release creeping up on him. His voice deep, and his breath coming out heavy as he speaks to you, even though you can barely process what’s coming out of your lovers mouth. A whine escapes your lips in reply. Whimpering as you feel yourself get even fuller, your boyfriend painting your gummy and overused walls with his cum. He fucks his seed into you before pulling out. Pulling your soaked panties back up, the soft fabric sitting snug against you.

“Gonna send you into work just like this, stuffed full of my cum. Let those other guys know that you belong to me..”

•

TOJI, SUKUNA, Suguru, Satoru, RENJI, KENPACHI, Naoya, OBITO, Pain, Kisame, Sasori, Todo, Choso, HIDAN, Kakuzu, Shiu

[cherubfae]

|| love rival || Akatsuki x reader

They're now realizing what a mistake it was to introduce you to the group, now they have competition with their own teammate.

tags: former ninja!reader, gn! civilian reader, established relationships, threats, violence, protective!akatsuki, slightly suggestive in Sasori's || MDNI

Pain

He knows that Konan is harmless and she's not the sort of disrespectful person to go sniffing about where she doesn't belong, especially where he and his partner are concerned. Pain, however, cannot tolerate the lingering touches Konan gives you as she passes by. Her hand brushing yours, guiding you with an arm around your shoulders, and blushing at you. He feels a warning is warranted.

"You are my dear friend, Konan, I have known you many years, but this simply won't do. You are better than how you are acting. Be respectful and leave them alone, and I won't need to inflict pain upon you."

Konan

Oh, well isn't this troublesome. Konan isn't the type to make idle threats, but Pain is her commander and leader. That would not be a wise decision on her part, but she does trust her long-time friend to be somewhat respectful and not place you in any situation where you would be uncomfortable. She's not above putting her foot down if she really must.

"Sir, with all due respect, my partner isn't interested and we would both appreciate you to mind your manners."

Obito

You are his everything. He would destroy the entire world for you. Level mountains, tame seas, there isn't anything he wouldn't do as long as it's within his power. He's pretty surprised that Zetsu even took a liking to you, as he's not one that's expressed interest in most anything other than his eating habits.

"Surely Zetsu is mistaken. My partner isn't a corpse for you to munch on you, nor are they yours for the taking. Keep your distance and I won't have to bloody you up too much."

Zetsu

As with anything, both sides of him are at a near constant quarrel with each other. His light side trying to reassure his darker side that Tobi is harmless and doesn't mean anything malicious by taking interest in you.

"Tobi is a good boy, he means no harm." "His harm is his unwarranted interest in our beloved partner. Fool! You have no sense, do you?"

Hidan

Honestly he could laugh so hard he may undo the stitches in his neck. That old fucker wants his partner?? Is he actually serious?

"Haha! That's fucking rich! You've gotta be at least one-hundred by now, huh? Fuck off, geezer! They're not yours!"

Kakuzu

Clearly decapitating Hidan over and over doesn't make him talk any less. Neither does stabbing him-- but it sure does take the edge off. Kakuzu would rather not deal with the younger man's insufferable stubbornness. You are his lover, his alone, and Hidan had no chance in whatever the fuck kind of afterlife his mighty lord Jashin provides. None. Fuck off, Hidan.

"As if they'd want someone as lowly as you. You don't even pay for your own shit. Remember your place or I won't hesitate to remove you from this world permanently. One swipe and your head will be freed from your miserable shoulders. I'm sure all sorts of insects would love to burrow inside of that hollow space."

Itachi

For a moment he's reminded of Sasuke's little schoolboy crush on you, except Kisame isn't Sasuke. He is a grown adult capable of getting in the way of Itachi's livelihood. Threatening the sanctity of his relationship. He's unlikely to do much other than step in if he crosses any boundaries or makes you uncomfortable. So until something is said, it's just this weird, heavy atmosphere. Kisame starts to speak but Itachi cuts him off immediately.

"Keep their name out of your mouth, Kisame. I won't warn you again."

Kisame

Oftentimes he wonders how lonely Itachi is. He annihilated his entire clan save for his younger brother in a single night. He took away everything he loved and for what? He can appreciate Itachi's past but Kisame doesn't take too kindly to the eldest Uchiha brother being a bit too welcoming and protective of his partner.

"Itachi, a word of advice. Don't shit where you eat. And keep your nose out of other's relationships. You're a good, respectable man and I appreciate your concern in my partner's well-being. Let me handle it from here."

Sasori

There's still the age-old artistic view difference between the two: eternal art vs shortlived art. One could argue both have their merits, but even after all these years it was a sore subject between the blonde and redhead duo. And now you were thrown into the mix.

"If you truly think you're so superior to me, Deidara, then perhaps you'd be more open to what a waste your art truly is. My partner prefers eternal, long-lasting, but there's nothing long nor lasting about, is there?"

Deidara

This was great. Jusssst great. Sasori had been hanging around his area of the hideout more and for what, Deidara wasn't sure. Until he recalled that you had been given special permission to visit from Pain himself. You'd forsaken your village long ago and clearly had no interest in reporting them, so it was allowed. Sasori had begun skulking about ever since and the blonde could guess why he might be drawn to you.

"If you even think about turning my partner into a fuckin' puppet, I won't hesitate to kill you, Sasori. No matter which way I go about it, you'll end up in splinters. So, I repeat. Stay the fuck away from them, hmm."

|| I DON'T GIVE PERMISSION FOR MY WORKS TO BE REPOSTED, RESHARED, OR EDITED. TUMBLR IS MY ONLY ACCOUNT AND THE ONLY PLACE WHERE I POST MY WRITING. ALL CHARACTERS BELONG TO THEIR RIGHTFUL OWNERS, THE STORY BELONGS TO ME. || CHERUBFAE © 2024

[dolliestfairy]

𝑂𝑜𝑝𝑠.. 👀 𓏲๋ ⊹ ֢

jjk, Genshin Impact, Naruto, & Haikyuu Men's react when they got caught in the act while fuck*ng with you ᰔᩚ ‌ིᨴּ ˒˒۪

ೀ𔓘 Tw : Smut, Public S*x, teasing, degradations, mocking. and maybe some misspelled words. lmk if i miss anything! ᰔᩚ Chubby reader fanfictions with no skintone of reader mentioned.

ೀ𔓘 Notes from Author ; tyvm for the long break. my head is like out of an ideas so i have to sort some things out to have an ideas again. and luckily and hopely from now on my heads will be full of these ideas lolol :3 ‌ིᨴּ ˒˒۪

꒰͡⠀Mdni

They Got Embarrased! This type of mens are a Huuuge shy bean! they got pretty embarrased when they got caught wet in you. wether the ones who peeks within it are his friends, his family, or even a stranger.. he still got sooo embarrased! you have to reassure him that everything is fine or later on he will get pretty embarrased that he want you to stop the deed for a moment 😭 but dont hate him though.. he's just super shy and he doesnt know how to handle it.. espesially if its his first time getting caught in the act.

( jjk ) ᰔᩚ Yuuji, YUUTA, Choso ( genshin impact ) ᰔᩚ AETHER, venti, KAZUHA, al-haitam ( naruto ) ᰔᩚ ROCK LEE, sasori, Yamato Sensei, minato ( Haikyuu ) ᰔᩚ Hinata, SUGAWARA, Akiteru Tsukishima, Akaashi, KOZUME KENMA, YAMAGUCHI.

They got a Little.. embarrased.. but Still continue anyway. these type of men will probably gonna stop for a second. its like when he pound into you and someones coming in but after that person sees you both during those things they immediately go out of the room, he's gonna have to proceed some things. its like he's... out of the server. but not even 1 minutes later he's already back and then he just like immediately grabbing you and then pound you Twice harder than before while saying some real real weird and nasty stuff.

( Jujutsu Kaisen ) ᰔᩚ MEGUMI, Geto, Nanami ( Genshin impact ) ᰔᩚ DILUC, XIAO, Ayato, ALBEDO, Zhongli ( Naruto ) ᰔᩚ Kakashi, NEJI, SHIKAMARU ( Haikyuu ) ᰔᩚ TSUKISHIMA KEI, SEMI EITA, Lev Haiba, MIYA TWINS, Kageyama.

THEY DOESNT GAVE A FUCK! what do you expect? do you think some buds or some strangers walking into the rooms will stop him from pounding your big ass hips? No! aint no fucking way. he'll gave whoever that person is some real fucking performance. wether they like it or not. And when that person wants to walk out of that room, he'll be quick enough to saying things like "hey buds! you dont want to check this out?! come see me tame my woman! i'll gave you some stuff to watch!" and others.. i know he's sound like a real Nuts, but.. thats who he is. you'll probably cant complain to him anyway since his excitedment will sped up the pace of his pounding, that'll make it the end of you. and just hope that he'll be merciful enough to not suffocate you with his teasing later on.

( jjk ) ᰔᩚ Toji, GOJO, SUKUNA, MAHITO ( Genshin impact ) ᰔᩚ Itto, SCARAMOUCHE, CHILDE, Kaeya ( Naruto ) ᰔᩚ Madara, OBITO, Sasuke, Kiba, NARUTO HIMSELF, HIDAN ( Haikyuu ) ᰔᩚ KUROO, Bokuto, KYOUTANI, Oikawa, TENDOU, TERUSHIMA.

DID I FORGET ANYONE? INSERT UR FAV!

[snuggleboots]

₊˚♡˚₊ The Akatsuki and their jealousy ₊˚♡˚₊

Tags: GN Reader, GN flirt, general jealousy and implied murder shenanigans.

Tobi essentially zeroes in the instant someone else starts laughing a little too hard at your jokes. Uhm, hello? You're funny, but you're not that funny. In fact, he's pretty sure he's the only person that busts a gut laughing when you crack your silly little one-liners or puns. It's cute to him, nobody else has any business making a play by acting all giggly and doe-eyed. He doesn't need to be violent about it - and really, why would he be? Tobi's just as happy to lean in - uncomfortably close - and then loudly declare that they have something stuck in their teeth! And it's super noticeable! So's their breath! It's not rude, he's just being helpful! He can smell their lunch through his mask! And it's rank! How embarrassing! Haha! They really should go brush their teeth, huh! Go away! Far, far, away!

Hidan is, in fact, very liable to wind up jealous over stupid little things that always result in becoming a pain in the ass for you to defuse when he inevitably hops onto his bullshit. You're out trying to enjoy one meal in peace together? That's funny, because the server seemed to put some weird, flirtatious emphasis on hot when they asked how you like your tea, and that's a problem, and that bitch knows it, too. Oh, they wanna know how hot you like it? Alright! There's loads of people on this earth, and they really wanna get stabbed over you? Fuck it! He just sat down, but clearly he's got some shit to do now. Dinner and a show! Why not?! He gets why Kakuzu doesn't tip now, not that he was gonna anyway. Shit service, and thirsty-ass servers. Fucking ridiculous.

Deidara is the first to notice when someone gets too close and cosy with you. Does it bug him immediately? No. His reaction, however, depends entirely on yours. Do you notice that they're smiling with way too much teeth when they playfully punched your arm? No? Alright. He can let that slide. It's when they deliberately divert your attention from him to themselves that he starts getting annoyed. He's not at all above pointing out tacky behaviour, petty king, and even if it embarrasses you a little, it is highly satisfying for him to see the flirt's face drop into something sour or burn up from the embarrassment. It's even better if you snicker along with him.

Kakuzu's only problem with someone chatting your ear off and really gushing over whatever comes out of your mouth is the fact that they're boosting your ego and he has to deal with it later. Not because the offending flirt boosted your ego, he doesn't give a damn about that, but he's now going to hear the same things you just told them about later when he's already just heard it - and he sincerely doesn't care to hear it again. He doesn't want to act interested, and yet he's going to be faced with either being called a dick, or being forced to feign something to avoid bickering about it after the fact. God dammit.

Kisame doesn't mind seeing someone try their damndest to flirt with you. He trusts you, and he's very happy to sit back while you turn them down- or, if he's lucky, watch while the flirt makes an idiot of themselves trying too hard to clue you in and get your attention. It's funny - he's laughing, and he isn't even trying to hide it. If he's in a cheeky mood, he'll even stir the pot, because he has gremlin tendencies and his humour is catered exclusively to himself. Yeah, he'll egg them on in little ways, until they're feeling nice and confident. Then, while he isn't really a PDA kind of guy, he'll drape a brawny arm over your shoulders, plonk a cheek atop your head and drawl something to the effect of, 'You know what? You do look great in that outfit. It'll look better on the floor later. Ready to go?' Kisame likes finding his own fun like this. The flirts always flap their lips like gasping fish when he hits 'em with that bit, and it tickles his brain just right.

Itachi is generally ambivalent. You have attractive qualities, he knows this, and he's well acquainted with the consequence of having said attractive qualities. As long as you're fine with it and nobody's pushing any obvious boundaries, he's fine with it too. Jealousy isn't an issue at all with Itachi. It only becomes one if you end up uncomfortable and the flirt doesn't pick up on that fact. In that case? He's glad to leave with you, if you don't feel like handling it. If you don't want to leave, or leaving isn't an option? Well, he can use his words. Or, if they've ruffled your feathers enough to annoy him, there are many benefits to being a genjutsu master. Oh, noooo, suddenly all eyes are on the flirt and the judgmental looks are intense and highly disarming. Or, uh oh! There's definitely a fire that just broke out, and they're the only one panicking about it! Oh wow, they left in a hurry. What a shame. They must've drank a little too much, or something like that.

Sasori, simply put, could not possibly care less if you paid him. Possibly aggravated by the fact that someone's breathing air in his direction while he's minding his business with you, someone he can actually tolerate. Yeah, he fully expects you to handle that. He's gained a knack for zoning minor annoyances out- until those minor annoyances become general annoyances. It's only when the offending flirt's voice becomes grating - which, really, doesn't take long at all before he bothers intervening if you haven't already shooed them away yourself. If a terse 'shut up' or 'begone' doesn't dissuade the persistent little gnat, he has poison and many fun, discrete vehicles with which to deliver it. It is purely for the sake of peace and quiet. Does he care when they drop like a sack of rocks, seizing and foaming at the mouth? Not particularly. Do as he does, and zone it out. Don't look at it (derogatory), you'll only encourage it to make more of a scene.

[cosmic-glow]

Request: "May I request soft akatsuki headcannons for a reader who loves to bake and cook? It's a passion of mine, and a great stress reliever! There's nothing I won't try and try to make!"

Notes: First of all, I'm sorry it took me so long to respond 😭 I also like cooking and I completely agree with you! I hope you like what I wrote, good reading!

"Are you hungry, love?"- Akatsuki

Warnings: no pronouns; no use of "y/n"; pure cuteness. Gender: Soft Headcanons. Characters: Itachi; Kisame; Deidara; Sasori; Kakuzu; Hidan; Zetsu; Tobi/Obito; Pein; Konan.

Itachi Uchiha

He always offers you help in the kitchen.

He is very picky when cooking for someone but is easily satisfied with whatever you cook for him.

He feels obligated to return the favor by cooking for you too. That's why he took charge of breakfast, always waking up before you to prepare what you like.

Likes hot foods and pasta. Loves handmade sweets.

He prefers traditional foods, but accepts trying new flavors when he's with you.

He loves going out to buy new ingredients with you, he knows a lot about the subject and would be of great help.

Kisame Hoshigaki

You know that popular saying that the best way to conquer a man is through his stomach? It applies very well to this man.

He likes to be spoiled with food and will be grateful for it so.. please cook for him.

His heart feels warm when he comes home and smells something delicious you are preparing.

He likes foods with a sweet and sour taste, and he loves meat. He also loves sweets, so it's not hard to please Kisame.

He loves trying new flavors with you. If you want, he'll even help you in the kitchen, but he's not very good (he's a bit clumsy).

He'll find a way to say thank you, whether it's washing the dishes, giving gifts, taking you out to eat, all of the above, whatever you prefer.

He's the kind of guy who would eat what you prepared even if it was completely burnt if he knew you put effort into it.

Deidara

He likes fast food, but is very happy when you cook for him.

Thanks to you, he's starting to eat more healthily, because he has a childish palate and is very resistant to exploring new flavors.

He likes spicy foods because are like an explosion in the mouth.

"I have to say, honey, your cooking is an art!" - he says with his mouth full when he really likes it.

One of his favorite moments of the day is when you're eating something you've prepared or he's bought, watching a movie and talking about anything.

It's something very simple, but if you make a cake just for him on his birthday, he'll feel so loved that he might even cry a little.

(Sometimes he brags to the other members about having such a skilled s/o in the kitchen).

But please keep this boy the hell away from the kitchen! When I say he's a complete chaos cooking, it's because the kitchen almost always explodes! Literally!

Sasori

He often forgets that he still needs to eat due to his puppet body, so he's grateful that you remind him. He still needs to eat a little every now and then to ensure a bit of vital energy or something.

And yes, that was the lie he invented to not disappoint you. And regardless of whether you believed it or not, he always eats your food, even though he knows how much work it will take to clean his insides afterwards (don't worry, he'll probably come up with something to solve this).

Understand, he lied because he knows how important cooking is to you, he sees how much you work at it, but had the misfortune of being with a guy who doesn't need to eat… but he couldn't risk hurting you for something that's his fault.

Sasori only eats your food and no one else's, no matter how much they insist.

He likes foods with strong spices, he no longer feels flavors in the same way as when he was a human.

At the end of every meal, he politely thanks you for the delicious food and offers to help with the dishes.

Kakuzu

He likes hot, very hot, and traditional foods. Doesn't like sweets.

He's great in the kitchen and sometimes cooks for you too, as a thank you. Kakuzu has many years of experience in the kitchen, take the opportunity to ask questions and get some tips, he may not show it but he really likes to help you.

Maybe you don't know, but Kakuzu practically never eats out, he knows that some people want him dead and could easily poison his food. So for him to eat everything you prepare without hesitation is really a great show of trust.

He is very silent while eating, but he doesn't mind if you want to talk about your day, he will be listening to every part.

He really appreciates your food, getting involved and asking about the spices you used, how you prepared it, he really likes it when you test a new recipe.

Always at the end of every meal he thanks you for the food and gets up before you to clear the table and wash the dishes, a silent way of thanking you.

Hidan

Spicy and crunchy foods and sour desserts, it's true heaven for him...

As incredible as it may seem, Hidan is very picky about his food, it's unbearable to go out to eat with him, it seems like he always makes a point of finding some flaw.

But it's the total opposite with you, he eats everything you prepare without complaining too much, just teasing you a little as always. Except if he is angry with you for some reason, then he will be impossible, no matter what you prepared, he will not eat it.

Hidan has a very annoying childhood palate, so don't force him to eat something he doesn't really like, like vegetables for example.

You'll probably have some arguments about him drink any kind of blood but not wanting to eat the soup you made (for example), but it won't change anything.

Whenever you enter the kitchen, Hidan follows right behind to find out what you're going to prepare and also because he loves to annoy you while you're cooking. He tickles you, bites you, hugs you, kisses you and even steals some utensils to disturb you before you kick him out of the kitchen.

Zetsu

He likes meat a lot, in fact you thought it was the only thing he could eat.

He is very impatient and even hugs you trying to convince you to let him eat before you finish.

"I don't care that it's not ready yet and it's raw, I'm hungry, love. Let me eat it just the way it is."

Not a very good critic of your recipes, he will eat literally anything you put in front of him and thank you for it.

You are the one who teaches him to have a more refined palate and he loves trying new flavors with you.

Zetsu grows a vegetable garden just for you, with everything you need fresh and tasty for your recipes.

Tobi/Obito Uchiha

Tobi >loves< sweets, make sweets for him and you'll have him curled up in the palm of your hand.

Both Tobi and Obito don't like spicy food.

He feels so loved when you cook for him <3 (a tip: prepare ramen for him when he's sad, it'll make him feel better).

Whenever he comes home early he brings you some sweets he bought at the bakery as a treat.

This is another man who is very easy to win over with his stomach. He'll feel very special if you tell him you've prepared something just for him. Make him your guinea pig for new recipes, he really doesn't mind and always gives you great feedback.

He always offers you the first bite out of respect, he is as happy to see you eating and talking about how tasty it is as he is to eat something you prepared.

Pein

Pein went through long periods of starvation as a child, so as much as it may seem, he isn't very picky about what he eats.

Likes hot and spicy foods. Hate sweets.

He is a great fan of your food, even if you've accidentally burnt it or overdone the seasoning, he'll be happy to eat something you've lovingly prepared.

Due to his work as leader of Akatsuki, he often forgets to eat properly. It's you who show up at his office and remind him to eat, with something you've prepared in hand, he's really grateful for your care.

He is always attentive to your needs. Did you like a cuter utensil kit than the ones you have? Are your. Wanting new seasonings? Suddenly they appear in your pantry. Everything you need.

Pein always makes it clear how he likes you to cook but that he doesn't want you to be overwhelmed with it, so he does everything to make this task easier for you, including ordering something from restaurants for you to eat and enjoy your free time together.

Konan

He likes mild sweets and, ironically, spicy foods. (Please make sweets for Konan, she likes a lot).

She will always feel like she is bothering or burdening you when you cook for her.

Konan isn't that good in the kitchen, so she's grateful to have a s/o who cooks so well. Sometimes she watches you cook to try to learn something, in an attempt to return the favor one day.

Buy a lot of sweets for you and make a point of always keeping your pantry well stocked so you don't have to worry about buying ingredients.

As I said, Konan doesn't like to burden you, so very often she takes you on restaurant dates.

Konan loves the culinary tours you plan, she could listen to you talk for hours about techniques, recipes and ideas. She loves seeing how excited you get talking about it.

Sorry for any typos;

Buy me a coffee?

Masterlist

[ladykissingfish]

Very Random Akatsuki Headcanons

Sasori would 100% have a garden, and most of the stuff he grows would be illegal or highly toxic. He would ask Zetsu for tips a lot and force Deidara to help him weed it even though Deidara will LOUDLY complain about it the whole time. Sasori will gently sing to/ talk to his plants when he thinks no one is looking.

Kisame the type to nag others about how important it is to drink water and stay hydrated but. He has never fully finished one single bottle of water. Any place they are, you can immediately tell that Kisame’s been there because every surface area will have plastic water bottles sitting on it with various levels of water in them.

Hidan has many, many bad teeth, mostly in the back of his mouth. Missing, chipped, cavities or straight rotting. Always in some level of pain but never seeks out help because you know, Lord Jashin encourages personal suffering. Was finally tentacle-held to a chair by Kakuzu and forced to let Sasori do what repair work he could after the others got tired of hearing him curse and grumble all night over his mouth pain. Absolutely loves his new smile afterwards but never admits it.

Every single member of the Akatsuki has at some point had a crush on Konan. Including Zetsu. But it went away once each member started seeing her as a sister or mother figure. The only one it didn’t go away for is Nagato, but he’d never admit his true feelings because he values their friendship and working relationship too much.

Itachi likes to collect rocks. He’s an amateur geologist and enjoys finding different types of stones when he’s out on missions. The others learn this about him and will sometimes take the time after missions or when traveling to pick up “pretty” rocks to bring back to him.

Deidara has a lot of anxiety and restlessness, and keeping himself busy alleviates that. He prefers doing things with his hands which is why he’s always making little sculptures with his clay. If no clay is available he’ll tap or drum his fingers on things or fiddle with his hair. The faster his fingers move it means the more anxious he feels. Sasori would get annoyed by this behavior so he created for Dei what would essentially be a ninja world version of a fidget-spinner. Deidara loved it and he makes sure to pack it with him whenever he leaves on missions.

Nagato’s fingers are often bloody because he’s a nail-biter to the extreme. He’ll chomp those things down right to the quick of the finger. The others will “gift” him gloves to try and prevent this from happening, and it’ll work for while, but sooner or later he’s right back at it again.

Deidara once gained ten pounds in two months because Tobi kept convincing him to stop at sweets cafes while they were out traveling, and then to have seconds and thirds of whatever they were eating.

Kakuzu figured out that Hidan didn’t know how to read when Hidan would avoid looking at the map on missions and kept giving Kakuzu wrong information about sign posts along roads. After a lot of convincing that he wasn’t “making fun of him”, Kakuzu finally got Hidan to let him teach him basic reading and math skills over the course of a year.

When Orochimaru was a part of the Akatsuki, one day he managed to get Konan alone and was hitting on her in a very creepy Jiraiya-esque way. Turns out that he was merely trying to get her to trust him so that, when he ultimately left the Akatsuki, he would be able to convince her to follow so he could study her body and paper-jutsu. Having had no close experiences with women other than Tsunade, who always responded favorably to flirtatious behavior, he’d assumed that this was how ALL women would react. If Itachi hadn’t driven Oro away, Konan would have blindsided and killed him first.

Nagato (in a Pein body) gave the sex talk to Deidara, Hidan and Itachi. All three of them hadn’t the slightest clue about how anything worked in that regard. Sasori gave him diagrams out of his medical books to aid in his talk. Nagato kept having to add on to his talk because of the questions. “What if you’re a guy who likes guys? How does that work?” “What if you don’t like anyone like that, or you don’t want to ever do those kind of things; is that okay?”

In strong sunlight:

Konan burns bright red.

Itachi and Hidan brown.

Zetsu withers.

Nagato dehydrates within two minutes. As does Kisame.

Deidara sprouts freckles.

Sasori smells like a fire.

Obito and his Hashirama cell DNA photosynthesize like a damn tree.

Kakuzu also turns into a freckle-factory but because his skin is already so dark, it’s unnoticeable.

Sasori has fairly moderate misophonia and especially can’t stand the sound of people chewing. It was one of his primary reasons for turning his body into a puppet; so he no longer had to endure the sound of himself eating. He thought he’d died and gone to hell when he found out that Deidara chews food with all three mouths.

Deidara likes Tobi to read to him at night. It gives him a very comfortable sleepy feeling. The more Deidara nods off the more Tobi lets his voice become more natural/Obito. This is pleasant to Obito because doing the “Tobi voice” all day puts a huge strain on his throat, so it’s nice to be able to break character once in a while and speak normally.

Hidan is extremely sensitive to the cold and will do anything to avoid having to travel or do missions in the winter.

Konan has kept a diary of her life ever since she was a child. She picked up the habit of writing during the period when Jiraiya was staying with/watching over her, Nagato and Yahiko.

Deidara developed a hell of a crush on Kakashi after “meeting” and getting his arms blown off by him and the Konoha nin. He’d gush about Kakashi for days afterward … to Tobi. Tobi who had to grit his teeth and not start screaming over how Kakashi unintentionally attracted everyone that Obito was ever interested in.

Best Smelling to Worst Smelling:

Konan

Tobi/Obito

Deidara

Kakuzu

Kisame

Zetsu

Itachi (would be higher but often smells like strong, bitter medicine and night-sweats)

Nagato (his actual body, not a Pein body)

Hidan and Sasori tie for worst because both smell like blood and corpses

Obito never killed his grandmother during the Uchiha massacre. He used a very powerful jutsu to erase her memory and then relocate her to a place in a village far away that took care of the elderly. He pays the facility with the money he earns/steals during missions, and every so often he’ll go and visit her at night, when she’s alone in her room. She doesn’t know who he is and just thinks that he’s a nice young man that’s there because he’s visiting somebody else.

Kisame loves to bake. It started because he was worried over Itachi being so thin and never seeming to want to eat anything other than desserts. So Kisame taught himself how to make cakes and pies and cookies, etc. Over time it became a zen-like activity to him that helps him relax and clear his head when he’s stressed out.

Kakuzu is as vain over his hair as Deidara is over his own. At least once a week they’ll get together and give each other trims and deep conditioning treatments. Sometimes Itachi will join if he feels up to it. Hidan mocks them for this but is secretly trying to grow his hair longer so that he can join them.

[moumouton4]

That Moment You Tried To Be On Top Hcs || Naruto characters x reader

Including : Sasuke Uchiha, Naruto Uzumaki, Kakashi Hatake, Yamato, Iruka Umino and Hidan

A/n : I received 2 asks and I'll be working on them slowly as I have exams soon ! Though it's be easier to know what you're thinking about if I could ask you the question I got. I'm thinking of the idols one of example 👀

A/n 2 : If you want to see others characters with this hc I'm open to suggestions ✨

Warnings : NSFW, penetrative sex, riding, cockwarming, 18+ READERS ONLY and wrap it before you tap it

Masterlist ⚜

I don’t give permission to repost my work, if you want to share it just reblogue it

Words count : 1983

Sasuke :

You decided not to talk to about it with him beforehand. You know him very well and 1. he never talk about sex and 2. because of his pride and as stupid as it may sound he tell you "no" right away

So you tried your luck while doing it when you were on top of him and his cock was sliding in and out of your tight cunt

If he realizes that you are trying to get out of his grip he will immediately put more pressure to keep you pinned where you are under him "Do you think I'm your bitch or something ?" It will take a lot for him to conceive the fact that you can be on top while you are having sex

So you had to blackmail him. Always finding excuses to refuse doing it so he couldn't be able touch you the way he was craving

You decided to hold out until he gave in and let you be on top. And frankly for the now you were holding on well

The same could not be said for him. He thought he could hold out but after 2 months without sex he thought he was going to go crazy because of how hard his cock was his every time he saw you

He really questioned one of his opinions for the first time in his life when he half-heartedly accepted that you were on top. And when he saw you riding him, oh gosh you looked like a goddess. As his hands squeezed your perfect breasts, with your gaze that seemed to was going to implode with pleasure was fixed in his, and the divine sounds you let out caressing his ears

He swears he's never cum so hard in his life he even moaned

Okay he might like it but don't expect it to be like this all the time nor even sometimes, he doesn't want to be vulnerable to you :(

But who knows with time he might end up letting you see more of his red, sweaty, disheveled face as you ride his pretty cock

He lowkey knows this moment will happen at some point and he can't wait for it to happen

Naruto :

You preferred not to tell him beforehand, because you knew he was going to tell his friends he still did afterwards. Also to do it when you're going at it will avoid you to be subjected to his endless questions about why and how you asked him that. Like he's going to worry about him not making you feel good :(

When you try though, he doesn't understand right away why you try to get out of his grip by wrapping your legs around his like this

He thought you wanted to stop or that something is wrong. So he releases you but to his surprise you flipped him over and found yourself on top of him. Pinning him to the bed just like you were a few moments before. His cock still buried inside you throbbed in a way that made your eyes roll

The high pitched cry of surprise he let out at that moment was priceless

He really liked this initiative from you, but being the hyperactive boy that he is, he couldn't help but grab your hips and pound into you when he felt his orgasm coming. Resulting with you cumming on him, your wetness running down his thighs

"That was definetely something dattebayo !"

This is something you'll do often, the days he's tired or recovering from his injuries. But most of times, when it's time to go to bed, he asks you to lie on top of him while you cockwarm him while you fall asleep in each other's arms, feeling the warmth of the love between you

Kakashi :

You don't talk about sex much in everyday life. Yes he reads Icha Icha in public but he is still uncomfortable talking about it. Just look at his scarlet face when Shikamaru asked him to read what was written on a page of his book and he struggled so much just said "I love you very much"

So it was while you were doing it that you asked him between moans "Can I ughh go on top ?"

His eyes only went slighlty wide before he flipped you both over at lightning speed ( pun unintented ) so that you were on top of him. You moaned as you clit grazed his pubic bone, giving you an etheral friction. You then grabbed his wrists and pinned them above his head

It was very exciting for him to finally reproduce one of the positions he had read in Icha Icha so many times well yes he reread it so many times

It became something you'd often do when he just got back from a mission and he's tired but still wants to get dirty with you

Don’t try to joke about him being secretly a sub because he is going to fuck you into the matress so hard you won’t even joke about that anymore… unless you’re into that ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

But he does like to see you on top of him so much that sometimes he asks you to lie on top of him without moving while he reads his bed lying in your bed while beng all warm and snug inside of you

Don't worry he will reward you appropriately afterwards you will need help to walk though

Yamato :

You figured he was shy with it since you didn't really talk about sex and when it happened it was spontaneously depending on your moods

Not to mention the face he made when he looked in Kakashi's book one day

In reality you were right because the few times you mentioned something sexual he ended up red as a lipstick or a sports car…. well bright red

So you decided to give it a shot just as he was about to lay you down on the bed and climb on top of you

You teleported your naked form behind him and pushed him in order to settle between his legs

His face was as red as a robin as always

"W-what are you- mpff" you cut him off by impaling yourself on his cock and giving a vigorous thrust with your hips

The sight that was subjected to his eyes was divine

"Princess- ugh p-please slower I won't l-last if-" to late he came

He came faster than he would have liked after only a few more strokes at this pace

He apologized for 15 minutes straight despite you telling him it was ok ( you were still on top of him at the time )

It didn't take long for him to get hard inside you again

And there you go again for 2nd ride

It's a position that you use a lot for quickies as you're more in control of your pleasure and he's even weaker for you like this. So it goes pretty fast

But Yamato staying true to himself would still be 1000 % flustered like the it's the first time when you're on top of him, because you're just so hot

Iruka :

He's a teacher and he teaches sex education to his older students, so you thought it was safe enough to speak about it without getting him embarrassed

But it's Iruka we're talking about and well you were wrong because the moment the words "do it" reached his ears he froze in place when you said "Next time we do it could I be on top ?"

He had to summon up a lot of self control to answer you "Erm s-s-sure L-l-love" he was as red as the pen he used to correct his students' tests

And he was so flustered and bothered after that. Like if for example you could have done it that night well you wouldn't because of the state he was in

Iruka.exe has stopped working

You had to trick him to start having sex again. What you had asked him had turned him on so much that he overthought it a lot which had him have a brief block

So you made up a plan. You grabbed his clothes while he was in the shower and waited for him to come out wrapped in a towel to put the next step of you plan into action

Your plan was just to jump his bones 😂

"Hey at least your clothes are already off we're saving time" you joked as you pushed him onto the bed while he yelped

You wasted no time straddling him and impaling yourself on his cock. He let you experience what you wanted and never tried to take over

He's just as proud of you for asking him to try new things and himself for holding on cumming for so long - even though he usually lasts longer - but for his defense you looked so delicious in that position

There was a 2nd round after that... and you've never been fucked this hard by him all the other times you did it

Definitely go back to this position often. Besides, you now take an initiative that he craves, that is, when he has a lot of exams to correct in the evening, you just sit on his dick while he marks them. You try your best not to move but it's really hard when you start feeling him roll his hips into you like this... and before you even know it he isn't grading papers anymore

Hidan :

You've been with him for a long time and you know very well that he has no taboos. So you asked him in a straightforward way

He was very interested because he is just a horny bastard but he has a misplaced pride that made him say with a shit eating grin "Don't forget you're the one taking my cock, not the other way around Princess"

You tried to retort but he spanked you hard and you squeaked

But you really wanted to see him pinned underneath you, so during your last mission for the Akatsuki, while he was doing his ritual for Jashin you offered him to join you next time if he accepted the proposal you had made to him some time ago

Of course his perverted mind made a direct link with the fact that you wanted to ride him and he accepted, feeling that having you with him in his rituals would be the most wonderful thing

When the time came he let you ride him and after a few strokes of your hips he lifted you up and pounded inside of you to relieve pressure he was feeling, thinking that you were going too slow

By the time he let you go at your own pace again your legs were already trembling from the pleasure you were feeling. So he simply flipped you over before fucking you hard, as usual

Hidan doesn't play fair lmao. He never did and probably never will

Anyways, he liked it a lot, a little too much even. Because sometimes he put you on top of him and make you feel like he was ordering you to do it when all he wants is for you is to use his dick to like an object of pleasure

Sometimes even when you are on a mission, when he feels horny almost all the time he sits cross-legged somewhere and asks you to ride him

And frankly, in a country where there's little chance of you meeting anyone or even being recognized, who would you be to deny your boyfriend that, especially knowing the sinful whines that escape his mouth when you circle your hips this way he loves so much

Cut to someone pointing 2 Akatsuki members fucking behind a tree

~

~

A/n : First headcanon on Naruto characters. Now I shall go to sleep it's 1 am 😂 I hope you guys liked it ! 🍿🌭 Again my requests are open 🥗🧀

Taglist : @foxxymunson, @cl0vr, @ilovemanypeople, @glossy1pearl, @jane57sstuff

[tozettastone]

So… akatsuki ranked by hugging capabilities when?

Okay. That's a good one. I'll answer that one.

--

10. Zetsu

Zetsu doesn't know what's happening and he might digest you. I would say he does not have hugging capabilities.

9. Kakuzu

Absolutely not. This man trusted someone one time to try it out and he has looked upon that moment with profound regret ever since. He does not do well with physical affection.

Do not hug Kakuzu. Do not make physical contact with Kakuzu. Honestly, if at all possible, do not even make eye contact with Kakuzu.

8. Konan

Konan is as distant as a statue until she has committed herself to a goal. She disdains most social bonds, and I don't think she hugs often even among people she regards as close. I think she is wary of obligation because she takes obligations very seriously. If someone takes comfort from her, what will they want next?

She will offer an arm to Nagato on a bad day, but he usually refuses anyway. Extremely low hugging capabilities.

7. Nagato

Nagato would certainly benefit from hugging but I see no indication that his hugging capabilities are especially developed. Besides, he's kind of immobilised, and the animated corpses he's piloting aren't exactly comfortable participants.

I think he and Konan were both much, much better at this before Yahiko's death. Very low hugging capabilities.

6. Tobi

Tobi is absolutely 100% capable of hugging properly. He scores highly in hugging capability. Technically. But, one, I think you will not be very good at actually landing a hug on this man. And, two, if you do, he's dissociating because he can't confront other people's positive regard for him, and your body is so much meat to him.

On the balance of probabilities, this is more likely safe to attempt than not. Tobi is more amused by making fun of people than killing them for touching him. But I just don't think hugging Tobi is, like, very productive.

5. Sasori

This one's interesting, because Sasori has actually practiced hugging — with his parents' corpses, right? As with all skills, practice helps you perform better! But I don't think Sasori has a very good relationship with his own body and I don't think he views other people as particularly more agential than the dead bodies.

So I'm ranking him somewhere in the middle: no natural hugging gifts, some practice, very little inclination to participate. Don't hug Sasori, because if you get that close at all, something is already very wrong.

4. Deidara

Deidara appears to be among the most socially normative of this cohort. I imagine he has, at some point, had at least one affectionate kohai among the Rock ninja he left behind. However, as an adult (uh, as a... teen over the age of ninja majority, anyway) Deidara appears highly suspicious of people attempting to initiate contact with him.

Moderate hugging capabilities, but if he thinks you're tricking him or you're being too familiar for the strictly defined relationship category you occupy in Deidara's head, you're going to be rebuffed. It won't be fatal... the first time.

3. Hidan

Hidan is an athletic guy who's used to feeling what other people are feeling and getting up close and personal with their physical experiences of their bodies. I really think Hidan is among the better huggers in this cohort. Capabilities genuinely pretty strong.

That said, hugging Hidan is a gamble. Either you get a bone-creaking squeeze from someone who is tall, warm, and has absolutely no issues with physical contact, or you end up dead. You would be rolling the dice on this one. Remember: eventually, the house always wins.

2. Kisame

Kisame does not have a lot of practice at exercising his hugging capabilities. Most people don't look at a giant shark man with a face full of razor sharp teeth and a sword as big as a teenager and think, 'ah, yes, a perfect source of physical affection.'

But I think as long as you don't startle him with any sudden movements he will respond to being hugged by very carefully lowering his arm over his hugging buddy's shoulders. It's weird but he's not mad. Pretty safe option.

1. Itachi

Itachi is not great at hugging but people who receive Itachi hugs are so impressed that they hardly notice. Also, it's pretty safe to hug Itachi: the worst outcome is that you discover you're hugging an illusion and feel mildly humiliated while everyone is impressed you even attempted such a feat.

He ranks this highly because I sincerely believe that as a big brother, he has attempted to hug at least one other (live) human being before. Sasuke might not have been old enough to remember it, but he's done it successfully and nobody died.

[waffliesinyoface]

Akatsuki Ranked: which is the worst to just have randomly show up on your doorstep

As in, you may or may not be someone they are looking for, but this is worse than running into them in public because they are at your house and paying attention to you.

Itachi: He is. Well. He claims to be a pacifist, he's just bad at it. If he's there to kill you it will be quick and painless. If he is there to kidnap you you'll just get genjutsu'd. If he's there because he like. Needs to borrow your phone, or a cup of milk or something, he will be polite-ish. You could do worse. It will probably be uncomfortable because he is a tremendously awkward individual, but not that bad. He might even make you forget he was even there. How nice and definitely not slightly horrifying.

Kisame: as a large blue shark man with a giant sword he is very upsetting to come across unexpectedly. You... really don't want him to be there for you, specifically. His gameplan for preventing naruto escaping was "what if we cut off his legs". He's probably fine if he just needs a favor and you happened to be the closest person!

Konan: if Konan has personally come to your door it is because she is here to collect you, and disagreeing is really not an option. She's too important to need a favor from a random civilian so she MUST be here for you. If she was here to kill you she wouldn't have knocked. Presumably, the fact that she came herself and didn't delegate is because she wanted you alive. Come quietly and you might not die horribly. Hopefully.

Deidara: the best version of deidara to have show up on your doorstep is one that is missing both arms and dripping blood all over the carpet. It is perhaps the one version of Deidara who won't cause you to die in an explosion, and he needs you alive to dial the phone for him. The bad news is that he might call someone ELSE to come pick him up, and then just flop down on your couch, getting blood on that, too. And then you have to deal with whoever he called.

Pein: You open the door. There is an terrifying corpse with bright purple eyes staring at you unblinkingly. You hear a sound behind you of the back door, or perhaps several windows breaking. If you could manage to turn around you would see several other very similar corpses. This is all horribly dramatic, you think. No matter what he's there for, it is not going to be good.

Sasori: Him showing up with the goal of capturing or killing you is, uh, bad. Very painful death, and you'll probably be turned into a puppet. Or spare parts. If he's just there for a favor from a random civilian, he might just hit you with a paralyzing poison and take whatever he needs without asking. You know. If he's feeling nice. There is a non zero chance he might just puppetize you anyways, if you look interesting enough. There's a small chance he might hit you with a sleeper agent seal and that is one of the better outcomes.

Obito: He's not going to kill you. But he will do his level best to make you have a mental breakdown. He will raid your fridge. He will "accidentally" break things. He might "accidentally" set himself on fire and then flail around and break more things. If he is kidnapping you he will not drop the act the entire time, and it will be awful, because despite the fact that he acts like an immature idiot child, he is terrifyingly skilled, and there is no way of escaping, even though it really seems like there should be.

Kakuzu: he's not going to knock, he is simply going to break the door. One of the most likely to show up specifically to kill you, because someone else paid him to do it. If he isn't, he will still just blatantly take things that he wants/look valuable and you will be helpless to stop him, because he is a man composed of solid muscle and slightly less solid tentacles.

Hidan: Repent, sinner, for you shall know the name of the god of suffering. (You will die. Badly.)

Zetsu: He doesn't really have any needs, and he doesn't get sent on regular missions, so if he's there... yeah, he'll just show up through the floor and eat you. Why are you like this, Zetsu.

[or0ch1maru]

𝟭𝟴+ 𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗼𝗿𝘀 𝗗𝗡𝗜, 𝗳𝗲𝗺 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿

𝗛𝗲𝗿𝗲’𝘀 𝗮 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗳𝗶𝗻𝗱 𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗵𝗼𝘄 𝗲𝗮𝗰𝗵 𝗔𝗸𝗮𝘁𝘀𝘂𝗸𝗶 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗻𝗲𝗿 𝘄𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝘀𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 ;)

•

𝗛𝗶𝗱𝗮𝗻 & 𝗞𝗮𝗸𝘂𝘇𝘂:

•these two love nothing more than a brat, someone to challenge them. someone who pushes their limits.

•both are brat tamers, all for punishments and funishments. You want to act out? Too damn bad. They’ll be the first to pull you into their room and snap that mentally right from you.

•toys, being tied up, sensory deprivation, all these among other things they’ll use on and against you. they truly enjoy watching the way you whimper, begging for them to use your holes.

•Kakuzu & Hidan are definitely on the rougher side of things but they both know when you need gentler loving, and won’t hesitate to slow down if they feel that you can’t handle it.

•praising? Forget about it, that won’t come until they’re done with you. “𝘀𝘂𝗰𝗵 𝗮 𝗱𝗶𝗿𝘁𝘆 𝗴𝗶𝗿𝗹”, “𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝗯𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗳𝘂𝗰𝗸 𝗱𝗼𝗹𝗹, 𝗱𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘀𝘄𝗲𝗲𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗿𝘁?”, “𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗶𝘁. 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗶𝘁 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝘄𝗵𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗮𝗿𝗲.” Are the comments they’ll coo and mewl into your ears as they mark you up and stuff you.

•are gods at aftercare. Hidan wasn’t aware that it was something that should and needed to be done after a session. Kakuzu had to explain it to him but once he understood, he was the first to jump up and make you comfortable. bubble baths, body massages, playing with you hair. These are just some of the ways to two will take care of you.

𝗦𝗮𝘀𝗼𝗿𝗶 & 𝗗𝗲𝗶𝗱𝗮𝗿𝗮:

•these two will take their time with you. They say your body is art and will marvel at you like you’re on a pedestal.

•what you would think would be a short and quick fuck, would turn into hours of pleasure. Each whimper, moan, and whine that escapes your lips only eggs them on.

•definitely taking turns. While one fucks you, the other will play with you. They enjoy doing this while in missionary. Deidara will have you up against him while his red haired partner fills you up. The blonde will play with your nipples, stroke your frame, nibble on your ears and leave purple marks on your neck.

•Sasori won’t cum yet. He’ll pull out and let his partner take his turn. Sasori will gently place your hand around his shaft, having you slowly stroke him as a test to your concentration.

•the pair love to praise. Especially when you’re taking both of them. “𝗹𝗼𝗼𝗸 𝗮𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂, 𝗯𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘀𝘂𝗰𝗵 𝗮 𝗴𝗼𝗼𝗱 𝗴𝗶𝗿𝗹 𝗮𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗯𝗼𝘁𝗵 𝗼𝗳 𝘂𝘀.”, “𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁'𝘀 𝗶𝘁 𝗯𝗮𝗯𝘆.”. they also love caressing & touching your face any chance they get.

•kisses. whether it’s on your lips or your neck, even your inner thighs, kissing is one thing they can’t go without. eye contact is another thing the two crave. they feel it’s a pure bonding, and intimate connection.

•their version of aftercare involves cuddling and sleeping. once everyone’s been cleaned up, they’ll place you gently between them, wrapping you up under the blanket and they’ll trace over your body and play with your hair until you fall asleep.

𝗣𝗮𝗶𝗻 & 𝗞𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗻:

•pain will have Konan focus on you first. Watching as his partners face is buried between your legs, causing you to cry out as her tongue flicks over your clit. He enjoys the way you grab onto her hair when she slides her fingers into you, almost as if you want her deeper.

•Konan is primarily the top with you, taking control until it’s time to take her partner. Sometimes she’ll have you finger fuck her, pleasing her the way she does you. These two also enjoy bringing toys into the mix. Edging you with a vibrator until you’re begging for release.

•Pain never lets either of the girls feel excluded. Giving both Konan and you the same amount of pleasure and attention. Hates when his girls are dissatisfied. While he fucks you, he’ll hold a vibrator to his partners clit, watching as they both become unraveled by his touch.

•when Pain is near his orgasm, he’ll have both of you get on your knees in front of him. The look of his girls this way throws him over the edge. Covering the both of you in his cum. All over your faces, it dripping down your chins and onto your chests.

•their version of aftercare is taking a nice hot shower. It’ll start off innocent, just lathering yourselves in soap to clean yourselves and before you know it, Pain will have you and Konan bent over and mushed against the shower wall.

𝗭𝗲𝘁𝘀𝘂 & 𝗧𝗼𝗯𝗶/𝗢𝗯𝗶𝘁𝗼:

•doms! This pair takes control. Black Zetsu will be the main focus out of him and white Zetsu, but white Zetsu is the one the praise you during your sessions.

•Obito prefers being the ‘sloppy’ second believe it or not. He’ll watch his partner stuff and fill your holes, listening to the way you cry as you take him. He also loves to taunt you when his partner is deep in your cunt. “𝘄𝗲 𝗯𝗼𝘁𝗵 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝘆𝗼𝘂'𝗿𝗲 𝗰𝗮𝗽𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗵𝗶𝗺 𝗱𝗼𝗹𝗹. 𝗗𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗿𝘂𝗻 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗵𝗶𝗺.”, “𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁'𝘀 𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝘄𝗵𝗼𝗿𝗲. 𝗟𝗼𝗼𝗸 𝗮𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘄𝗮𝘆 𝘆𝗼𝘂'𝗿𝗲 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗲𝘁𝗰𝗵𝗲𝗱 𝗼𝘂𝘁.”, “𝘆𝗼𝘂'𝗿𝗲 𝘀𝗼 𝗽𝗮𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘁𝗶𝗰. 𝗜𝘀 𝘇𝗲𝘁𝘀𝘂 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗲𝗻𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘆𝗼𝘂? 𝗔𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗴𝗿𝗲𝗲𝗱𝘆 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗻𝗲𝗲𝗱 𝗮𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗰𝗼𝗰𝗸?”

•they both love choking. Your neck will be red for hours after each session. Any form of marking these two are able to leave on you fuels them. They both have an ownership & possession kink. They’re not satisfied until you’re covered in purple and red marks.

•another thing to two love doing is pulling out and cumming on your entrance. The pair love watching as you go about your daily activities with their cum mixing together in your panties.

•uses each other for punishments. You piss off Obito? You’ll be paying for that as Zetsu stuffs your holes, his partner will be right next to you as your face is mushed on the wall, into the carpet, into a pillow. The usual taunting will continue, becoming harsher with each sentence. Obito knows his words cause you to become soaked, craving nothing but his cock inside you, and that’s what you’re being deprived of.

•Zetsu is the same. If you anger him, you’re out of luck. He’ll have Tobi bending you over a desk, completely wrecking you. Zetsu does taunt, just not as much as Tobi. What he does instead is stroke his cock. Just out of your arms reach. It’s look but don’t touch, which drives you mad.

•at the end of this, they’ll run you a hot bath. Letting you relax and unwind in the warm water. They’ll be found in the kitchen, preparing a delicious meal for after.

𝗞𝗶𝘀𝗮𝗺𝗲 & 𝗜𝘁𝗮𝗰𝗵𝗶:

•just like Deidara & Sasori, these two prefer going slow. They’ll go all day if they choose.

•when there isn’t enough time to have sex, they’ll have you take turns riding their thighs. Leaving stains from your juices on their pant legs.

•these two aren’t ashamed of pushing you against a tree while out on a mission. They also don’t care if anybody discovers the three of you getting it on, whether that’s at home in the compound or while on a task.

•hair pullers. That nice bun, or ponytail you had? It’ll be wrecked by the time these two are done with you.

•late at night, they love when you get on top. Taking your time and doing what movements you need to get your release. They love watching the way your tits bounce as you ride their cocks.

•as much as they love using you, they prefer when you use them. If you crave them in the middle of the night, they’ll be more than happy to give you what you want. You want to sneak off from a group dinner and have a quickie in a bathroom, just give them that look and they’ll find an excuse to leave.

•when it comes to aftercare, they will worship your body like it’s the last thing they’ll ever do. Don’t get me wrong, they worship you while fucking, but seeing your body after, sets them both into overdrive. Body massages, compliments and praises, and kissing.

[junk-heart]

They're falling down that specific canon related hole

Love how Hidan's hair stays in place even though he's falling (the amount of who knows what he puts on his head makes his hair as hard as concrete)

A closer pic

[succikko-draws]

My gift for the hilarious @ladytyburn for the Nagato Birthday gift exchange! Expanding again on her office AU (this is why Kisame has been un-fished a bit YES it felt wrong but I'm strong)

[Image ID: A three page digital comic about Nagato's birthday.

On the first panel, Konan seems to be thinking hard, a cup of coffee in her hand, Itachi stands next to her and asks: "What's wrong Konan?" She explains: "It's Nagato's birthday on Tuesday... And I don't know what to get him..." Itachi innocently answers, thinking about old Madara: "Oh I know the struggle, I never know what to get my grandpa. Old people haha." She put a hand on his shoulder, and tell him through gritted teeth: "Itachi... Nagato is 35." Itachi is very embarrassed and apologizes. Before he can add anything he's interrupted by Deidara who put his hand on Itachi's shoulder, saying to Konan: "You could buy me art!" She asks: "Can you guarantee it won't explode?" to which he answers: "Nope!" so she dismiss the idea. Hidan includes himself in the conversation, suggesting: "Easy! Buy yourself lingerie and surprise him!" Deidara and Itachi are mortified, scolding him: "Hidan! That's so inappropriate! And you can't theorize about the boss' private life!" Konan dismiss the idea, unphased: "Nah I already have enough and picked one already for that night." Itachi is even more mortified, feeling like this is Too Much Info. Sasori chimes in holding a doll still in her box, suggesting it for the present, but Konan dismiss it as well. She says: "I want something truly special. More personal-" Sasori attempt to chime in again, saying: "A you shaped doll-" but she angrily dismiss him again, pushing him down with her hand. Kisame tells her wisely: "You know him the best, Konan. Trust yourself. Pick something that will make you think of him."

On the next page, Konan is out of the office, wearing casual clothes with a small green backpack and wanders what seems to be a mall, still upset and thinking: "... Something that will make me think of him..." Her attention is caught by something and she smiles at last, saying: "Oh! This is!..." On the next panel she holds a book over her head triumphantly, exclaiming: "Our old teach's new book!! Yes! This is perfect!! He loved the first one!" She is standing next to a book display with a poster of Jiraiya in a funny pose and goofy expression, the poster reads: "New! By 'best seller' '''author''' Jiraiya." On the next panel, time has past and it is now Nagato's birthday. He is late at work, just closing his laptop, appearing tired and saying: "-Sigh- It's already 7 pm. I didn't see time pass by... Again... Time to go home." But as he comes out of his office on his wheelchair (wearing his coat and froggie slippers), he is surprised by loud exclamations and the pop of multiple party horns and confetti thrower. His employees yells: "Happy birthday boss!!" While he looks horrified and genuinely scared.

On the next panel, the office is all prepped for a party, a tablet is set up with Zetsu the plant (wearing a bowtie), a cake and a bottle of champagne. Hidan is holding balloons and is yelling, pointing at the table: "We even got you a cake!" A banner hanging on the wall reads: "Happy 635th birthday!" Deidara is screaming: "I got fireworks!" holding one up in the air. On the side, Kakuzu is sleeping on an office chair next to a table with a cup on it. A caption reads: "was drugged to avoid a money tantrum." Nagato is all confused, hair disheveled by the shock. Konan is standing in the middle, holding her present, looking all embarrassed, she tells him: "I'm so sorry, I didn't know they'd do this..." She then give him the present, watching him unwrap it with a soft smile, reminiscing a dear memory of their teacher putting his hands on their head when they were kids, Nagato holding his book preciously. She says: "I took Kisame's advice and picked something that made me think of us... I think you'll love it." The background behind her is made of grey and pinkish roses. But when Nagato unwraps the book he totally misses the author name and is instead shocked to read the big warning in the corner: "R18, this is porn." He turns red and sit shocked and confused with the book in his hands. The background behind him is a collage of ahegaos (I'm sorry). Konan put her hands next to her face, smiling wide and asking: "So... Do you like it?" Next to her is a caption pointing at her: "Genuinely did not check." She looks so happy but Nagato is still red and confused, he doesn't want to offend her and ruin her happiness so he answers: "Y-yes thank you." Everyone in the room (even the plant) looks at him with a knowing naughty smile as he gets even more embarrassed, Nagato frowns wondering: "Why in front of everyone!" /.End ID]