#esp with work

[wachtelspinat]

i can't help but feel like my drawing days are kind of over. not entirely, i'll still be drawing from time to time. and deffo not because i want to. but i'm having this exact same feeling since mid 2022, since i was really struggling with my elective period, i kind of disconnected with art there and never truly found my way back. on top of everything that came after - moving, starting a job and working to be good at it which leaves such little room for other things because i can't handle my life well - there is just so much horrible shit going on. and i'm having a hard time comprehending it.

a part of me also feels very stupid for drawing one thing for almost 4 years now constantly, but another part of me knows "hey, but this makes you happy". it's a constant battle in my head because online spaces are like school grounds, and i don't actually wanna stand in the corner as that one kid that just can't shut up about that one character. but then again all i ever did was drawing fanart so... what does it. who gives a shit. be cringe and be free alright. but it kinda feels so hollow, esp. when you're at it for so long. a lot of mutuals move on. some are not even active anymore anywhere. and i wonder what happened. plus a huge chunk of the tone of the fandom has changed. also with the source material getting butchered so hard (since the release of ow2) it just kills the fun. playing this game used to be fun. playing this game was one thing that helped me getting through the last meters of university. it's like watching the downfall of the simpsons again without making the comparison too set in stone, just... this thing that used to be decent and nice and watching it getting ruined in real time (broken promises about pve, the recent gameplay changes?? the lore was fucked up from the start but they kind of tried, now it's just skins for 20+ dollars) while still having feelings for the characters is shit. anyway...

i recently went through a big folder of stuff i'd drawn at the age of 12-15 and there were so many fucked up but cool monster and cyborgs designs and just silly stupid stuff and all i could think of was that i felt so distanced from it, like i don't even know i think this is normal? because a lot of time has passed and a lot has happened and i knew i've drawn all this but i wasn't able to locate the person who did in my present me now and... it's just so normal that things move constantly forward but i feel like i missed huge chunks and passed a few stops and now i'm kind of lost.

i don't even know what i'm trying to say here anymore. i just feel sad because it feels like sth is slipping out of my grasp or sth has changed tremendously and i don't know how to make damage control.

i keep trying tho, i try to draw once a week at least. it's just like as soon as i take a step back and look at it i don't feel it at all. gonna continue tho, until it makes sense again i hope.

[sabertoothwalrus]

does science experiments on you (homoerotically)

[hinamie]

ṇ̵̛̱͌̅̃͛̔o̴̮̓̀͂́̃_̴̛̲́s̷͈̋̈́̄̋͠ị̶͔̗̐͐̐̒̕g̵̛̱̘̣̑͂ņ̴̰͔̘͇̏̒̓̇͠͝a̸̜̥̩̭͋̌ḷ̶͔̖͗͋͛͛̃͆

[suntails]

light magic

[stuckinapril]

friend wanted to see my tumblr, and when i told him i can’t show it to him bc it’s basically my personal diary he went “oh so I can’t see it but a bunch of strangers on tumblr can??” he literally does not get me. no one will get me like the people in my phone get me

[sasswonfp]

This joke came to me in a fit of laughter (ALT description provided :3!)

[madamemiz]

sad: falling out of a hyperfixation

tragic: watching your beloved friends and mutuals fall out of the hyperfixation while you're still in it

[madqueenalanna]

honestly it was so big brained to have will graham be a fisherman cause like everything else about him is so prey-coded; he's the dog rescuer, he has seventeen mental illnesses, his brain is on fire, he's the lamb in the grip of the lion. but he's also the fisherman. he ties his own flies, he goes out into the river, he baits and waits and sinks his hook in, barbs and all. from the beginning he always has power, even when he seems like he's at hannibal's mercy, at jack's, at his own, he still rolls a cast and waits for the bite

[splash-o-matica]

“Side order was short” babe youre not done until you unlock all of THESE

[idiotsonlyevent]

slavic chilchuck moodboard

[lesbians4armand]

no but really i do think a lot about how assad zaman and bally gill already knew each other for AT LEAST 6 or 7 years prior to iwtv and how much funnier that makes the whole rashid situation. because imagine you audition for a minor character role as a servant in a horror series only to be told that no, actually, you’re playing one of the most major and important characters in it. and then you get to call your friend and go hey i have a role for you and it’s going to be really funny i promise.

[numbuh424]

The unstoppable, mighty hurricane and the immovable, cold, hard truth.

[bacchuschucklefuck]

doing chibi is a good design exercise bc it forces u to think on shapes n essential details, essentially thumbnailing ur designs. its also a terrible design exercise bc it ends up looking cute no matter what

[flwrstqr]

(花朵) ˖◌ 🖥️ TYPES OF BOYFRIENDS WITH ENHA HYUNG LINE ꒱ 🪽 ⋆ enhypen hyung line x f!reader ♡ fluff, skinship, 𓈃 ◌ CLiCK HERE ◞⠀

𝐋𝐄𝐄 𝐇𝐄𝐄𝐒𝐄𝐔𝐍𝐆 - gamer bf

heeseung’s arms are wrapped around you, controller in hand as you sit snugly on his lap, leaning back into his chest. “comfortable, baby?” he murmurs, his breath tickling your ear. you nod, feeling the soft rumble of his laugh as he focuses on the game, fingers deftly moving across the buttons. “you’re my lucky charm, you know that?” he teases, pressing a quick kiss to your neck. you smile, your hands on top of his, “maybe i should be the one playing then,” you joke, but he just chuckles, nuzzling into your hair. with each victory, he tilts his head down to kiss you, the game almost forgotten in favor of holding you close. “i think you’re the real game changer here,” he says, voice soft

𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐊 𝐉𝐎𝐍𝐆𝐒𝐄𝐎𝐍𝐆 - rich bf

“surprise, babe,” jay says with a grin, holding out a sleek, gift-wrapped box. you raise an eyebrow, already knowing his tendency to spoil you. “jay, what did you do this time?” you ask, but there’s no stopping the smile tugging at your lips. “just something i thought you’d like,” he shrugs, but the excitement in his eyes gives him away. you carefully unwrap the gift, revealing an necklace. “jay, this is too much,” you whisper. he steps closer, gently taking the necklace and fastening it around your neck. “nothing’s too much for my princess,” he says softly, his fingers brushing against your skin. he admires the necklace on you for a moment before pulling you into his arms. “i just want to see you happy,” he murmurs, pressing a kiss to your forehead

𝐒𝐈𝐌 𝐉𝐀𝐄𝐘𝐔𝐍 - loser bf

“i can’t believe i forgot our anniversary,” jake groans, slumping onto the couch next to you, his face buried in his hands. you chuckle, nudging him playfully. “it’s okay, jake. i’m not mad.” he peeks at you through his fingers, looking like a kicked puppy. “you should be, though. i’m the worst boyfriend ever.” you shake your head, wrapping your arms around him. “no, you’re just a little forgetful,” you tease, kissing his cheek. he sighs dramatically, leaning into your touch. “how did i get so lucky with you? you should’ve dumped me ages ago.” you laugh, shaking your head. “never. you’re my loser, remember?” his lips curl into a small smile as he pulls you closer, resting his head on your shoulder. “i’ll make it up to you, i swear,” he promises, and you can’t help but smile “i know you will, jake. that’s why i love you.”

𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐊 𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐇��𝐎𝐍 - overprotective bf

“who was that guy?” sunghoon asks, his tone a little too sharp as he watches the waiter walk away after taking your order. you glance at him, noticing the way his jaw is clenched, and you can’t help but smile. “just the waiter, hoon. relax,” you say, reaching across the table to take his hand. he sighs, still glaring at the spot where the waiter stood. “he was flirting with you and checking you out,” he mutters, squeezing your hand a bit tighter. you laugh softly, rubbing your thumb over his knuckles. “he was just being polite. you’re the only one i’m interested in, silly.” he finally looks at you, his expression softening, but there’s still a hint of jealousy in his eyes. “i just don’t like anyone looking at you like that,” he admits, voice low. you lean over the table, brushing a kiss on his lips. “you’ve got nothing to worry about, hoon. i’m all yours.” his lips twitch into a small smile, his grip on your hand relaxing. “yeah, you better be,” he says, a playful glint in his eyes now, and you know he’s back to his usual self.

[care666bear]

Quick selfie this morning after sleeping in past my alarms ✨

[katabay]

THERE AIN'T NO ATLAS, KID. NEVER WAS.

if you peel him back far enough, there's nothing but a pile of theater masks

like, it's really fun how fontaine starts spiralling out the closer jack gets to him in the final arc of the game and returns to appropriating the image of family (the fake family in the beginning, the flawed father position later) to try and appeal to jack in some way but it's like. buddy. baby. you already took off your mask. anything you try and put on after this is going to come across as cheap and desperate. the magic is gone! and personally? I'm hooting and hollering

⭐ places I’m at! bsky / pixiv / pillowfort /cohost / cara.app / insta