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eggcats · 4 months

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I'm still (always) thinking about my Housewife Vox AU, so here are my sexuality/history/etc headcanons for Alastor and Vox in it

(I kind of have more for Alastor here, bc almost all of my Hazbin ships involve him so he's the one I've thought about more - I kind of keep similar headcanons no matter what ship I'm thinking of, tbh).

I'm also going to write Alastor being in a rut in this AU, because those fics are always fun, and he will be having sex but it'll be more in a "my mate is aroused and I must please them" kind of way, if that makes sense? I kind of see him as sex-neutral/positive asexual, even in a rut, but the rut makes him a little (lot) more feral and in less control of his instincts. (This is why, before he got into a relationship with Vox, he's never really been affected by the sexual aspects of a rut, because he's only interested in sex as far as his mate is).

(I know my fic kind of tiptoes around any possible consent issues, but I think having Alastor react like this kind of solves it in a way, because he's only interested in making his mate feel good so if Vox didn't want something or began to not like it, Alastor would immediately stop to comfort his mate. However, since he's never before had ANY of his deer/demonic instincts really show before, none of them are sure how he'll react this time, hence the concern).

(I don't mean this in a way to insult any other Alastor-rut fics, trust me I love them, this is just how I'm writing mine here).

I put a readmore here bc I realized how many words I was writing and didn't want to clog your dash, lol.

Alastor:

Asexual - is generally so uninterested he has never masturbated or even considered doing so; knows and understands sex (in a baseline level) but doesn't know anything further as he never wanted to engage or see it; still is only interested in it in a way to experience/watch Vox enjoy himself, wouldn't engage on his own otherwise

Possibly aromantic - the line between "romantic love" and "this person belongs to me" is essentially the same to him, could not tell you the difference (side note: neither can I)

Doesn't know either of those things

Just thinks "I'm the only normal motherfucker alive/in hell when it comes to relationships" and has not had a single question in regards to himself since

Doesn't really understand the difference between being friends/roommates and being in a relationship (hence when he found out that Vox liked him, he was like ah, okay. I don't need to change anything here, since he thinks we're in a relationship, this must be what people DO in a relationship. No need to mention any of this to Vox, surely)

When eventually I do make him have sex, he doesn't really have a preference in position. Generally, I'll include him as the more dominant partner (especially with Vox), but that's more because that's what VOX wants, and Alastor is being intimate for Vox. He has no real preference on who tops and who bottoms, as long as Vox is enjoying himself (and Alastor gets enjoyment out of the act when Vox is)

The same applies to dancing - Alastor teaches Vox how to swing dance, but once Vox learns and becomes more comfortable, a lot of their dancing has them constantly switching the lead and following position, based on whatever they feel like doing at the time

Despite living in the 20s/30s is fairly open minded about a lot of things relating to gender and sexuality, because he lived in the vice district in New Orleans and was exposed to a lot of that (either growing up, or living there as a serial killer, or both).

Some parts of me think that after he murdered his father when he was only around 13-15 (another headcanon of mine), his mother needed a way to make money and so they moved to the vice district, and so Alastor knew and grew up with sex workers and cross-dressers and saw how they were treated by police/society, and so has no issues with them.

Living there when he was a serial killer was also useful, because no one bothers anyone to avoid the risk of setting the police on you.

He doesn't know a lot of more modern terms for things, but Vox wanting to wear a dress doesn't concern him, nor does being in a relationship with a man, since those were things he not only had experienced/seen when he was alive, he's also been in hell for 20 years which is, as a whole, a lot more open minded about things. (I did try to keep him ignorant of more modern things, tho, like he doesn't know anything about things he would have only seen/experienced in hell because he doesn't care about people or relationships, really).

Probably some form of autistic (same, bestie) and takes a lot of cues about how their relationship should be from Vox (which is why he originally didn't feel the need to change his behavior even when he found out Vox was interested in him, because it didn't occur to him at all, and only discovered Vox was sexually interested when it was shoved in his face - however, now that he knows, he's taken a much more active/possessive role in their relationship, including a sexual aspect)

Vox:

(Previously) closeted bisexual

Grew up/lived/married/died in middle Americana, white picket fence, 2.5 children, all the houses looking identical, 1950s desperate housewives edition, the whole shebang

DID have a cult, but I'm thinking less Manson, and more "televangelist who extorts his flock for money/power" - this is why he has his hypnosis powers (he doesn't really have them/have discovered them yet, but that's because he's never really had a chance to explore his powers in any real capacity - he basically showed up in hell and then was kidnapped and wifed up immediately)

Did have a wife and children, but wasn't interested in either of them - had them more so because he "had" to and it would look bad for his image, not out of any attraction or love to his wife

All of this contributes to him doing everything he can to try to hide his attraction to Alastor, because he had to do so in life

He's Really Bad At Hiding It tho, because living with Alastor (who, even before he learned Vox was interested in him, has very little boundaries to physical space and just grabs and touches him all the time) is different than being a little attracted to your neighbor

Also, no one in hell calls him out on it, so he never quite realizes how obvious he comes across

Does eventually start his side of the media business, with the help of Alastor, to combine both radio and television to take over the airwaves entirely - becomes the Television/Video Demon, to complete the Radio Demon

Stops Alastor from murdering any and all other media demons/demons who have similar powers over the airwaves, and instead makes deals for their souls to work for him - this is where a lot of his initial power/dealmaking comes from as he rises to also be an Overlord; even when Alastor is the one who finds a media demon he basically just kidnaps them and drops them at Vox's feet like a cat presenting a half-dead mouse to it's owner

(Note: I'm aware that Alastor is canonically asexual and he's still in my AU, and I've heard back and forth about him being canonically aromantic and I'm unsure if you'd classify him as aro here too. I'm ace, and I think (maybe?) I might be on the aro spectrum, but regardless I kind of write Alastor like how I'd see relationships/would develop into one in a similar way. I'm not interested in sex or anything, and I've been interested in people/relationships very rarely (and those I am, once I become close friends I'm usually like, oh cool, yay), so I'm kind of using myself as a baseline to figure out how Al feels about things here.

That being said, I don't agree with people harassing other creators who DON'T make Alastor ace or aro in their fics or art, bc it's fan content and so it doesn't matter. Changing a sexuality in a fanfic isn't the same as Actual Erasure and it's wild that people claim that, because I've been reading fanfic since I was 13 and I PROMISE you none of those characters were as queer as I was reading them, lmao. Despite all evidence to the contrary, when they grew up Naruto and Sasuke did NOT fuck nasty in the Hokage office, no matter how much they should have.

Sorry rant, over.)

#hazbin hotel #fic #mine #alastor #vox #long post #like i said i'm using myself as a baseline for a lot of Al's feelings towards sex and relationships here #radiostatic #Housewife Vox AU

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blackwolfstabs · 1 year

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30 Day Writing Challenge: Day 7

PATCHING EACH OTHER UP

Bruised and bloody, Sam comes home and catches the attention of someone who promises companionship in loneliness.

takes place in June 2023 (almost 4 months before Scream VI)

Sam stumbled into the apartment complex’s foyer, the blood running from her head dripping onto her eyelashes to distort her vision. Her busted lip throbbed, while her ribs stayed at the steady intensity of pain they had been in the whole trek there. She wasn’t knocked unconscious, which was something to be happy about, but the pain and bruises keeping her awake were starting to make her wish she had passed out just for a few moments.

Rumor after rumor, blame after blame. Because word got out about her being Billy Loomis’s daughter, everyone who recognized her hated her. Even all the way in New York. This was the second time this week that she was jumped by a group of ignorant strangers on the streets that she was still trying to figure out. The first attack hadn’t been as brutal, but fighting back had its consequences. To them, she was nothing more than an unruly animal that needed to be put-down, because of their destruction to the humans it lived among. Social media had her groomed to be a devil in disguise, a wolf in sheep’s clothing, a liar, and a killer. And therefore, she was ambushed that night, and they beat the hell out of her.

She tried to keep it all to herself, but she couldn’t hide the fresh and dried blood, nor the bruises that would begin to form within the next couple of hours. It was a stroke of luck that today happened to be the day that Tara had her night class, so she wouldn’t be home until later. However, their new roommate, Quinn Bailey, was there, and she would hound her with questions for sure.

Samantha gripped the railing to the small staircase leading from the foyer to an upper level, her already-beat-up knuckles turning white with the intensity of her hold. A pained hiss left her as she wrapped her arm around her torso, pausing on the first step. Even the softest touch of her hand holding her ribcage made it pulse with agony. But she pulled herself along, forcing herself up the remaining stairs to make it to the elevated area, but not without nearly tripping on the last one.

Thankfully, no one was around, allowing her to collapse at the bottom of the first flight of stairs, when she made it there. She shifted with a grunt, situating herself to lean against the wall and closing her eyes to take a moment to breathe. Staying still wasn’t miserable after a while. Being lonely wasn’t miserable after a while, either. She had grown used to both of these: pain and loneliness, especially since the rumors of her being the mastermind of the 2022 Woodsboro murders had run wild. She knew what it felt like to be a mistake, a disappointment, and a sad excuse, but being hated… that was something of a different realm.

She’d keep all of her bruises, cuts, and injuries hidden from Tara, Chad, and Mindy. They were just getting into the swing of their first college semester, so the last thing she would do would be to distract them from their education. They didn’t need that, and it wasn’t of their concern anyway. This was her problem.

Her head pounded. Her skin burned. Her stomach was tender. Overall, she felt weak, and for a second, she thought about staying down there for the rest of the night. Climbing the stairs was a job in itself without being injured, so to spare what energy she had left, avoiding it didn’t sound like a bad idea.

The longer she sat there, the more tranquil her surroundings became. The pain was still there, but the part of her brain linked to it was shutting down with the longing for rest. Everything slowly started to fade, but it was quick enough to have her not recall when she stopped engaging with the sounds of the apartment building. In fact, she hadn’t even realized that she was starting to drift into unconsciousness until a hand touched her shoulder. She jumped, eyes snapping open and immediately sitting up properly to lay eyes on who had touched her.

Blue eyes met her dark ones, and she froze.

“Easy,” the newcomer soothed, drawing his hand away from her and taking a step back to prove his amicability. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you.”

It was the guy from across the hall to her apartment, the one that had caught her attention like a dog to a squirrel. She didn’t know his name, nor did she know his heart, but something about him clipped a leash to her once-collarless perspective. She swore that she would never love again after Richie, but because of the transition from Woodsboro to New York and then spending most days and nights on her own because of the twins and Tara having college classes, she began to feel lonely. Her posture relaxed a little. “It’s fine,” she rasped as she prepared herself to stand up. “I… shouldn’t be down here anyway.” She winced when she tried to twist her spine, her bruised ribs stealing some of the air from her lungs.

The other could clearly see that she was in need of some medical assistance—not the hospital kind, per se, but some basic first aid. “You’re hurt.” He watched the way her fist gripped the railing on the stairs as if letting go would promise a long and painful drop. “What happened?” He wanted to help her stand, but someone who reacted the way she did to his touch and trying to dismiss herself from another’s company told him that she wasn’t the most promising with trust at the first helping hand.

“Something stupid,” she answered coldly, then pulled herself up to lean against the stairs. She bit back a cry as a stabbing pain shot through her head, making her bring a hand up to it.

However, he didn’t miss the quiet groan that came from her throat, which led him to offer, “Can I help you to your apartment? I don’t think it’s safe for you to be alone, you might have a concussion.” He moved closer to her, but she shook her head.

“I don’t,” she retorted, not looking up. Whenever she looked up, the pain in her head got worse, and it didn’t help when she lowered her hand to see it covered in blood. “I’m fine…” She was an expert at lying by now, go figure. “But thank you.”

The stranger was quiet for a moment, nodding as he stepped back again, but that only lasted a few seconds, for watching her drag herself up the stairs wasn’t going to settle for him. “Okay, I was trying to be respectful, but…”

She stopped, turning her dipped head over her shoulder.

“I’m not gonna let you go up those stairs by yourself. You’re bleeding, and bruised, and from the looks of it, you hit your head pretty hard, or someone hit it,” he told her. She just stared at him in silence, so he went on, “Would you please let me help you?”

Sam blinked at him. He didn’t feel like a threat, but her ability to trust anyone was extremely low at this point. Granted, she was exhausted, and her entire body felt like it was strapped in a harness and dragging the weight of the world behind her like some wounded horse on a battlefield. Fuck it. What did she have to lose? “Okay.”

He then proceeded around to her left side, ducking to guide her arm around his neck. She didn’t say anything as they started taking steps, just winced with a soft grunt that had more crack than voice. He didn’t make it noticeable that he was watching her, for he just glanced out of the corner of his eye when checking in. “Let me know, if you need to stop and rest for a minute,” he told her, and he caught the subtle nod she gave. “My name’s Danny, by the way. Should’ve told you that first.”

Sam didn’t pay it too much mind as she replied, “Sam.” Her voice was strained, the pressure in her head building the more she moved. She wouldn’t admit it for the sake of being a loner, but she appreciated the support he gave. Otherwise, she was sure it’d take her an hour to get up all of the flights necessary.

“Is that short for Samantha?”

She couldn’t move her head, but her brow hardened as she glanced out of the corner of her eye while giving a short nod.

Danny could feel the change in her demeanor after he asked that. It wasn’t hard to figure out why. “Lucky guess,” he assured her. The feeling of her nails clutching his shirt’s neckline occurred often, usually accompanied by a failed-to-hold-back groan or a strained grunt that was part hiss. She’d nearly trip on some steps too, making him move his supporting arm away from her upper back and gently sliding it around her waist. “Can I do this?” His hand found her hip.

She nodded, even though she wasn’t sure about it. Being that close was better than tripping or collapsing, where she’d likely end up in the hospital or at a doctor’s office without the ability to dictate who could touch her where. Then, she felt his hand softly squeeze her hip as she made it to another flight. Her heart started gunning, and a subtle heat came to her face.

He didn’t seem to notice; however, he did notice how the longer they walked, the more tired she became. “I’m not sure if I can ask this, but I’m gonna do it anyway,” he began, “I don’t think you should bandage yourself up alone, so would you consider letting me take you to my apartment and helping you?” She gave him a look, which made him go on to explain, “Your sister and friends are out, aren’t they? You’d be by yourself—”

“Have you been watching me or something?” she challenged, halting in their climb to wait for an answer.

“No, I just notice a lot,” he replied with a light shrug. “I notice who comes in and out the most. I notice when people move in and move out, and who they did either with. I notice you looking at me from time-to-time through the window.”

Samantha went hot. Very hot. Not with anger, but with embarrassment. She couldn’t even say anything, all the things she could say silenced by her own exposure. She walked on.

Apparently, Danny could sense that speechlessness coming from her, and it made him chuckle, “Don’t worry, it’s alright. I don’t mind. And if we’re being honest, I’ve looked at you from time-to-time, too.”

She refused to look up or over at him. “Is that supposed to make me feel better?”

“Yeah, kind of.”

She scoffed.

“But in all seriousness, I really do think it’d be better for someone to help you get cleaned up,” he redirected back to his question. “I mean, no offense, but you look terrible.”

“None taken.”

“You’re already having a hard time standing up straight. I’ve got what you’d need, if you’d just give me a little more of your time,” he offered. “You can leave right after, no strings attached.”

Sam sighed. He seemed genuine, but it all went back with her having to trust him. Furthermore, the idea of being alone with him in his apartment—his territory—intimidated her. She didn’t know why, but it gave her a weird feeling in her stomach as if her body couldn’t decide if she was in distress or eustress. But he made a good point… with her current state, if she were to try to patch herself up, chances were high that she wouldn’t do as good a job as someone else who possessed a clear and steady mind would. “Alright, fine,” she surrendered, “but I need to leave before my sister gets back.”

“Sure,” he nodded, “Like I said, I’m just helping you out. Not gonna hold you hostage.”

When they got to his apartment, he guided her to the kitchen, where he released his hold on her to go get the proper medication and bandages she would need.

She didn’t say much, just leaned the small of her back against the counter and held her aching ribs. She hung her head, pressing more of her weight against the edge. She hadn’t noticed he’d come back until he spoke.

“Would you mind sitting up on the counter for me?”

She lifted her face to meet him, a weary glaze heavy in her eyes. It took her a brief moment to process what he was asking, but eventually, she caught on and nodded.

Danny set the small basket of basic first aid he’d retrieved from the bathroom on the counter. He watched her move carefully as she prepared herself to move up onto where he asked. He noticed the way her biceps toned generously, showing that she was centering her leverage with the strength she held in her arms, and from what he had observed, it wasn’t hard to guess why. She seemed to struggle a little when having to use her core to elevate herself enough, which made him secure her on either side of her chest to help her the rest of the way. He did this instinctively, not noticing he actually did it until he drew away to find her giving him a dark look. “Sorry. You looked like you needed some assistance…”

Samantha grunted as the outward curve of her spine pressed on the bruise she was sure was covering most of her left rib cage. It made her straighten up as much as she could. “Why are you doing this?” she ignored his explanation as he gently placed an ice pack to her head.

“Hold that on there,” he ordered, then moved to get a washcloth when she obeyed. “Why not?” He answered her question and went to the sink to dampen it, “I saw you hurt and got involved.” Then, he came back. “What, did you think I was just gonna leave you nearly passed out in the lobby?” He brushed her hair aside to begin wiping the blood off her forehead.

The injured flinched a little, “Yeah, I did.” She pressed the ice pack further against her head. “Especially because I said I was fine…”

“You don’t look it,” he retorted. “You’ve got trust issues?”

She closed one eye as the washcloth came close to it, “Another lucky guess?”

He smirked and nodded, taking away the towelette now that the majority of the crimson liquid was off her face. He then took a cotton square and saturated it with antiseptic. “Remove the ice real quick.”

And she did, watching him closely. Her eyes followed his hand as he held it up to her.

“This is gonna sting a little,” he warned.

She didn’t move until the solution soaked into the gash near her hairline. She flinched with a small noise, her nails gripping the overhang of the counter.

“I know,” the other tried to soothe as he continued to dap around the area. He glanced down to find her dark chocolate eyes staring into his.

“Are you a doctor or something?” she started a new conversation, her shoulders bracing to keep herself from pulling away.

He shook his head. “Nah. Just something I’ve picked up over the years, you know?”

Fair enough.

“And what about you?” He turned it around. “What brought you to New York? You and the three others moved in about 2 months ago, right?” He gave her a small glance as he traded the cotton square for a bandage.

Sam shrugged, “It’s a long story.”

“We’ve got time.”

“Maybe another day.” She bowed her head a little so he could place it accordingly.

Danny nodded, “Okay.” He applied some ointment to her bottom lip, then went quiet for a moment, figuring out what he should access next. He noticed her holding her ribs a lot, which gave way to her awkward posture when she’d walk or even how she’d sit. He guessed that was it. “Now that we’re here, are you gonna tell me who did this to you? Or is that on a need-to-know basis, too?”

She stared at him. Those ocean eyes just struck her in a weird way… a different way. One that she couldn’t figure out was good or bad. And because of that, she was tempted to explain everything, but that meant he would find out who she really was. Who in their right mind would stick around with someone who held a thrill for killing in their blood? So, she chose to keep it to herself. “Need-to-know is good, right now,” she replied. She had only just met him officially within the last hour.

“I respect that.” He crossed in front of her to retrieve another ice pack from the freezer. “I’m always down for a mystery.” He then passed her a playful smirk, “I find those to be the best kind of secrets.” Once again, she just blinked at him, stoic and reserved, but he didn’t take it personal as he came back to her. “You don’t smile very much, do you?”

She shifted uncomfortably, breaking her eye-contact. “Not since I was 13…”

He nodded. “Mm. And how old are you now?”

“26.”

“Over 10 years… that’s a long time.”

“Doesn’t feel as long as it sounds.”

Danny broke the conversation, gesturing to the hand that was guarding her torso. “May I check out what’s going on there?” He sensed a stronger sense of protection by the way she didn’t move her hand away to give him consent. “You don’t have to take the shirt off or anything, just lift it up,” he promised.

Sam hesitated for a moment but conceded anyway and went to grab the hem of her shirt with the hand that wasn’t holding the ice pack to her head. She pulled it up to have cool air engulf her hot skin, the chill against her skull having her fight back a spontaneous shiver.

She could only lift her top up at an awkward diagonal using one hand, so her caregiver took care of the side she didn’t get, careful to not cause any pain for he could already see the dark purple hue drifting from her ribs. Easing the bunched cloth up to the end of her bra, he allowed her to take a proper hold of both sides. “Just hold that up there for me,” he told her in a gentle manner.

She did, even though the heat coming from her body being regulated by the coverage of her abdomen felt better than the fresh air did.

“So, out of everything in this world, achievable or not right now,” he continued the smiling topic from earlier, “What makes you smile?”

That was a question. A question that she’d never had to answer before. It almost felt awkward to think about, but at the end of the day, her happiness came from one reason alone. “My sister,” she answered.

“You two must be close, huh?”

“You could say that. We were really close when we were little, and then I made a mistake, and… it was never the same after that.”

“Was it really a mistake though?”

“Excuse me?”

“Maybe it was an accident, not a mistake,” he explained. “I’m not saying I know what happened, but in my opinion, children are innocent. That’s how they learn. I don’t see children making mistakes, but rather, they do something by accident, because they don’t know everything that’s expected of them.” He looked up from wrapping the 2nd ice pack in a paper towel. “You know what I mean?”

This took Samantha by surprise, even if her expression didn’t show it. “Yeah… I never thought of it that way.”

He just shrugged, moving back to stand in front of her. “Okay, I’m gonna try to be as gentle as possible, but I’m gonna have to feel if you have any broken ribs,” he changed the subject. When she nodded, he added, “Let me know if it gets to be too much, okay?”

“Okay.” She tugged on her gathered shirt a little more and clutched it in a tight fist. She knew this was going to hurt, but he made a good point.

Danny then put his hands on either side of her ribcage. Her skin was like fire compared to his icy fingers, and he felt her jump in response, catching her stomach instinctively convulsing inward to pull away. “Easy,” he reminded her, “I know my hands are cold, but try not to move too much.”

“Try freezing,” she growled, sounding more pained than irritated. She bit her tongue as he began to apply slight pressure to the injured bones. It was like she became hypersensitive, flexing her throat to prevent a grunt or whimper coming out, but tensing just made it hurt more.

He noticed this. “Keep breathing, Sam,” he encouraged as he slid his hands around to her back, pressing on her ribs and then in between them. Luckily, she didn’t show much of a painful reaction, which led him to repeat the same thing on her cages’ flanks.

Agony was quick but heavy in response to the blood clotting currently taking place. Sam shut her eyes and nearly broke her teeth with how bad she clenched them. Fuck, did it hurt. However, when his fingers sank in between the bones, she couldn’t hold back. A breathless gasp forced past her defense, mindlessly dropping the ice she held against her head to push his closest wrist away, barking, “Okay, that’s enough!”

And he listened, retreating from her. “Alright, alright. I’m done,” he reassured. “I don’t think you have any broken ribs, so that’s good.” He turned away to find something else in the first aid basket.

His patient shifted uncomfortably, swallowing back the pitched desperation she didn’t notice her voice held until after she had called him off.

“Here,” he started again, “I’m gonna give you an ice pack for your left side—because it seems to be worse over there—and wrap it so it stays in place without you having to hold it.” He glanced up to acknowledge her, “I’ll let you keep it, so you can get out of here, after I do this. Is that okay with you?”

Oh, God, putting ice over that area was sure to be excruciating. She could barely stand the opposing temperature of his hands. However, at least it’d numb the pain, so she nodded. “Yeah, that’s fine.” She was still trying to figure out what a guy like him had any business trying to help someone like her. They were basically strangers, and yet, he was treating her with the kind of generosity and respect that no other stranger had before. “Thank you.” Even the way he looked at her was different—felt different.

And she didn’t mind it.

“You’re welcome,” he answered, then resumed his position before her to carry out the last part of his treatment. “Okay…” His blue eyes raised to meet hers. “You ready?”

She nodded, straightening a little and using both hands to keep her shirt raised for his accuracy. Well… for his accuracy and the violent urge she’d have when that ice met her skin, even when protected by the paper towel he had wrapped it in.

The other then placed the ice pack accordingly over the purple splotch staining her normally-tan skin. He kept it easy, applying only enough pressure to keep it in place, while he handled the wrapping he would use to hold it in place.

She kept her spine straight, trying to focus on that rather than the cold seeping into her wound. But she went back to holding her shirt with one hand while the other took over his on her ribs. “I got it, just take care of the bandage,” she told him, her voice much quieter and calmer than it was a few minutes ago.

“Thanks.” Danny ripped a strip of medical tape and set it on the edge of the counter, while he orchestrated the gauze wrapping he’d use first.

Sam focused on breathing with her chest, overlooking him to focus on anything else but the urge to rip the ice pack from her ribcage. She felt the soft touch of the gauze corral her back, before it was brought around to encircle her torso at least three times. Then, he held the bandaging in place with one hand, while the other retrieved the spare tape. Again, he strived to be as delicate as possible when securing the tape where it needed to be, which she appreciated. But when his hand left the wrapping to accidentally stroke her bare stomach, a ticklish sensation had her flinching and snapping her attention back to him.

He noticed this and immediately found her eyes, thinking he had hurt her. “You’re good, I’m not gonna touch you anymore,” he promised, then gave her a small smile, “But I’ve appreciated your patience.” Now, both of his hands were on the counter, straddling her in between as she tugged her shirt back to normal.

There was a softness in his eyes that kept her from looking away. He said that was the last thing he would do before he let her go home, but for a moment, they seemed to be locked in some sort of trance, as if, behind their eyes, a reality that wasn’t reality captivated them. It was confusing, because there really wasn’t a word to put on what was happening. Maybe it was a few words? Maybe a little more? Maybe…

Love at first sight?

Whatever it was, Sam broke it, knowing that Tara would be home soon. She couldn’t say she was in as much of a rush to leave as she was when she first got there, though. “I– I’m sorry, I don’t have anything to thank you with,” she spoke, glancing down in a bashful way.

But Danny shook his head. “Ah, don’t worry about it. No compensation needed. I’d say we’re even.”

She looked up again, confused. “What do you mean?”

“Well, we patched each other up tonight,” he shrugged.

“How so?” she blinked with a slightly hardened brow. “I mean, it’s obvious for me but…”

He glanced off for a minute, like he was trying to find the right words even though he already had them. “Thanks to you, I wasn’t lonely tonight,” he confessed. “That’s enough for me.”

There was honesty in the warm smile he gave her that made her heartbeat pick up and butterflies swirl in her stomach. The pain she felt dissolved into a subtle heat that flooded through her, showing most prominently in the flush on her cheeks. She hadn’t felt that in years, if not ever before.

“There’s that smile,” he teased. “See, now that wasn’t so hard, was it?”

She hadn’t even realized she was smiling until he pointed it out, making her look away in slight embarrassment. “I never said it was hard…”

“But you did it without your sister,” he countered, “That’s impressive.”

She rolled her eyes, giving him the win. “Congratulations.”

This just made him chuckle, before coming on with a more sincere tone. “You should do it more often. It really is beautiful.” He caught her eyes again.

Her blush deepened, and she could feel it, which led her to give in. “Thank you…” But she figured she really did need to get home, so she gestured to the basket to her right, “And thank you for all this… I didn’t realize how much I needed it, until…”

“It’s my pleasure,” Danny answered, pushing himself away from the counter to allow her to get down. “Get some rest tonight, okay? And if you need anything, you know where to find me, now.”

Sam nodded and slid off the counter carefully, bringing a hand up to her bandaged ribs as she did so to keep them steady. “You too,” she replied.

He returned the nod and led her to the door. “You think I’ll be able to see you again?” he asked as he opened it for her, “You know, under better circumstances?”

Now in the hallway, she turned halfway. “Yeah,” she nodded, “I think so.” And for his pleasure, she granted him another smile.

He smiled back and dismissed her on that note. “Goodnight, Samantha.”

Normally, she despised when anyone called her by her full first name, but when it came from him, it seemed to miss that nerve.

“Goodnight, Danny.”

My apologies for the delayed post! I had to check with another writer before posting, because this idea sounded similar to something they wrote. But they were so sweet and supportive about it!

All my best to you ♡ - parker

#scream #scream v #scream vi #sam carpenter #danny brackett #carpenter sisters #30 day writing challenge #patching each other up #AU: The Way I Am

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blonkk · 3 months

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feeling healthy. classic friday night crying unexpectedly because it just occurred to me that im almost 30 and ive spent the last 3 days alone with no one to talk to. im just in bed watching the simpsons wishing i had someone with me just to fucking watch the simpsons or stupid youtube comps. i’ve been seething because my roommate left days ago without telling me and he hasn’t cleaned a thing since i moved in so i’ve spent the past 2 days scrubbing the place clean which makes me resentful. he also left his aging dog here and she drives me insane and i didn’t sign up to be a dog owner but here we are. should i let her starve and shit in the house or do i just do the right thing and make sure shes fed. let her out when she screams at the door at all hours of the day night and morning. its been raining but stopped today so i left the house and spent 50$ on nothing and i still dont have a job and i just have to come up with new ways to spend my time with nothing to do no money no one to talk do on this shithole hill

like when you’re young and optimistic and idealistic you never think that sad loser is gonna be you. like no way i’m gonna be a sad friendless lonely freak of nature. no way im gonna be broke and jobless near 30.

and it just creeps up and like i’d do anything to get out of this but i just fail and fail and fail and i can’t find a way out. everything is just closing in on me rn. and if i go home to my parents i wont need to worry as much about money for the time being but what kind of back peddling is that….i spent my entire 20s working up the courage to move out completely and again im failing. i can’t go home anyways because believe it or not my situation is every worse there

and my parents are so scared for me…like they won’t say it but they’re ashamed and disappointed and they pity me which is honestly worse than anything else….i don’t want them to help me out of pity it feels like no one believes in me at all

which makes sense lol i don’t believe in myself either….i don’t excel at anything…..i can’t even get an entry level job in my field where i have experience…i can’t monetize anything else i do because im just not a very skilled person and its not self pity, or maybe it is, but like no one cares about art or whatever it is i like to do.

like i’ve felt like i’ve been fading away for a few years now as friends and family moved onto bigger and better and it’s just getting worse as time goes on…i don’t know what i want i’ve never known and it doesn’t even matter because i’ve never gotten anything i’ve wanted anyways. i just want to not be lonely. it’s so simple

i just want to disconnect from everyone and everything because i’m so beaten down by rejection and failure and isolation and despite good things these bad things compound and im so exhausted i don’t even care about what happens to me anymore

it’s so weird being this person you know people pity…that the worst part

i’m tying….i go outside…i exercise…i engage with my hobbies….i haven’t shut out my friends….i keep applying for work even though i feel this feeling of dread and know it wont go anywhere …i haven’t given up yet but im not really under any illusions that things will “get better” anymore

anyways i’m sorry for the boo hoo wah woe is me wahhhh moment im just so sick and tired of this relentless shit

#dni #happy weekend everyone

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moondirti · 1 year

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Hi, I've stumbled onto your work for the first time with animalic and the way you write absolutely blows my mind. Just the flow of the words, the pacing, the in-depth characterizations, descriptions, and the level of care you have with your work is amazing! I always been afraid of starting to write, but reading your work inspired me to pick up a pen for the first time. I was wondering if you had any tips for an aspiring writer and what the process was like trying to write this fanfic.

thank you so much! im so honoured that my work gave u the push u needed like?? hdjsjdjs that’s incredible! i wish u the best of luck <3

when it comes to tips, it’s important to first acknowledge that every writer’s workflow is vastly different and that, often times, you’ll need to nail down your own in order to realise your full potential. however, these are some things i keep in mind that i think would help you too!

write with intention; a big thing that helped me was realising that there is no one-size-fits-all formula. when i start the brainstorming process, i come up with a couple of things that are unique to the story (for animalic, it was reader’s powers/backstory and her relationship with miguel). it’s important that these be your very foundational elements, because they’re where you’ll be branching out from. everything i write, i write with either – or both – lenses in mind, so that everything has a sense of cohesion and builds on one another.

read out loud; i do this all the goddamn time and my roommates hate me for it, but something that truly helps me figure out pacing and sentence structure is reading my wip out loud. your brain races through words, so things tend to blur together and you lose the actual voice of the narrative. by sounding it out, you’re looking at it through a fresh perspective, which will help you find problem spots or clumsy language.

vary your prose; pacing does not need to be as tricky as it is, not if you understand how the average human consciousness works. think about it - when you’re stressed or rushed, do you linger on small details? odds are the answer is no. when i write action, i keep my sentences and descriptions short, as averse to the more flowery style i equip for moments of tension/dawdling. it helps keep reader engaged while leaving room for errors in judgement

this isn’t all of it, but i hope it works for ya<3

#༄dee answers #darling anons #animalic #tips

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kevin-the-bruyne · 2 years

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the episode title 'wrong you right time' combined with the fact that by their 5th anniversary they're no longer touching sends me to a special level of alanwen hell like damn they really were genuinely in love and wanted to be with each other for a vast majority of their relationship. So how can two people who tried, who used to work to the point that wen proposed, suddenly stop making sense?

I think it's likely their engagement that catalyzed wen's dissatisfaction with their relationship. Waking up every day and going on with his life probably didn't feel bad, he might have even been content, he might have even been happy enough that he had proposed. But it's one thing to go through life thinking of only today and the next and a whole other to see your days being every day for the rest of your life. There's a lot of outside factors that can contribute to the dissatisfaction with one's everyday life. And I think it's those factors that led to their ultimate demise. We've all clocked Alan's demanding schedule but there were likely things Wen was dissatisfied with in his own life/career/routine that nothing to do with Alan.

Wen telling Jim that he wants to come home and be at peace has been interpreted by a lot of people (including myself) as Alan being the one actively disturbing that peace. The more likely scenario given ep. 5 is that there were other things in Wen's life that was disturbing his peace and when he'd come home Alan couldn't give him the comfort he sought.

I've joked about Alan processing his breakup the way i processed my phd (genuine highs but also very devastating lows from the same source) but...i think it did work a little bit like that where when other things in their life were happy and stable, they could be happy and stable together. When other aspects of their life went wrong, they were unable to comfort each other and be there for each other.

And I'm fairly certain, something like this - it ran both ways. Wen knows Alan even though he didn't know what to do with him, leading to their long messy breakup. I think it's likely he could tell that he wasn't very successful at being Alan's home either, leading to even more feelings of inadequacy and dissatisfaction.

I was really shocked at hearing Wen say 'i don't want to go jogging with you' and 'i don't want to go to shabu with you' like how can you kick a man who's down because you've broken up with him and ridicule the things he likes doing. But no, I've realized that it's less that Wen didn't like doing activities that Alan enjoyed and more that Wen had been reduced to just those activities by Alan himself.

Eventually, the balance between them being roommates over lovers tipped beyond a point that Wen could tolerate. Alan likely never really opened his heart to Wen and it made Wen realize that he hadn't opened his heart to him either. This was likely always true of them but they couldn't see it till they were tested with their lives growing more complicated.

Wrong You. Right Time.

#moonlight chicken #moonlight chicken meta #alanwen #dont touch me im having feelings #im unraveling at the seams

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ysabelmystic · 1 year

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I am incredibly interested in your life. Please tell me about the poop incident

Ask and you shall receive. I will pre-warn everyone that sex will be involved in this story but nothing too graphic will be described. Proceed at your own risk.

This was about a year and a half into the relationship. During this time, my then-boyfriend (or as my friends and I call him, Bitchboy) lived in an apartment that was right next door to his two best friends (we'll call them Robert and Larry). Robert and Larry had a key to Bitchboy's apartment, which led to lots of obnoxious intrusions, but this was never more irritating than during the height of Robert and Bitchboy's poop obsession.

I don't know if they got the idea from South Park or this was a symptom of their bodybuilding hobby, but they became obsessed with weighing themselves before and after taking a shit to see how much their shit weighed. While Bitchboy could not commit to a relationship (see 3 total breakups with me alone and at least one incident of cheating), he was extremely committed to the bit (and Robert, but that's its own story). What started as a funny joke between two college guys quickly became a plague upon roommates, girlfriends, and neighbors, as every time either of them took a shit, no matter the time or circumstance, they would barge into each other's apartments to announce the weight of that day's dump.

You can probably guess where this is going.

Bitchboy's apartment was generally the location of intimacy due to my roommates frequently being home while his roommate, probably sick of Robert's crap (pun intended), was almost never home. So we were fully engaged in the act one day when we heard the front door open. Okay. The roommate is probably home from class. We need to be a little quieter and wrap it up but no big deal.

Then, the knob starts rattling. And then, Robert starts banging on the door. "Bitchboy! Open up! Open up!" Real serious tone, like someone's dying. And maybe it is serious. It's two in the afternoon. There's no reason why the door would be locked -specifically because of Robert's barging-into-Bitchboy's-apartment habits- unless we were naked or having sex.

"What's going on?" I ask, announcing my presence.

Instead of apologizing and backing off, he decides to tell us both the exciting news. "Bitchboy! The protein shake worked! I finally took a shit! My shit weighed 2.6 pounds!"

To which Bitchboy responds with a level of cheers and excitement that he usually reserved for football games. He finished, cleaned up, and told me to put my clothes on, and as soon as I so much as had my bra and shorts on, he let Robert in so they could celebrate this accomplishment, leaving me confused and annoyed, looking for my shirt, and trying to hide an assortment of toys.

I guess at least he'd seen the gear before and didn't have any commentary to make (or interest in stealing my dildo for lols), which shows that my expectations for behavior were borderline nonexistent. We were down to "don't burn down the apartment" and "don't cost me $500 in dental work again".

#ive got more unfortunately #this was just the weirdest thing those two did #ask

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berylcluster · 6 months

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⊰ starter for @fragmcntdstars HANNIBAL for WILL ⊱

➫ HANNIBAL hadn't quite settled into their new life, wiping his finger on every available surface and clicking his tongue every time he brought the digit to his face to examine it. This lodge wasn't taken care of, or hadn't seen a single duster since it had been built, either way. Just like the last place, he could count on the pair not staying here for very long, but he longed for the comforts of his home. Years of a fabricated medical practise paid for that house once or twice over, and while he wasn't hurting for money, they couldn't spend too much money on the roof over their heads or the foods they bought. Too much of a red flag, need to stay under the radar, he hears Will's voice in his head, scolding him almost. How dare he complain about his comfort levels. This had left the cannibal in quite a put out mood, finding everything wrong with the lodging that he could, until finally he could take no more.

Donning his signature apron, he fashioned a duster with a wrinkled shirt he found on the floor earlier, tying it loosely around his own hand, and once he started this, he couldn't be stopped. Cleaning and cooking had been the ways in which he could relax, find peace within himself when the world around him was so unkept and chaotic. And since he could no longer cook, with no kitchen to speak of anymore. Chaos was fun when you could control it, not so much when the dirt was staring you in the face. Hannibal hadn't meant to go snooping through his roommate's things, however, while moving Will's bag, a medical kit had rolled to the floor. Now this was odd, as he knew his friend, and knew that he would never engage in dangerous drugs. Unless it was without his knowledge, the doctor corrected himself, placing the pack back on the bag, not inside. This was entirely intentional, a smirk creeping onto his lips, as he silently hoped the other would walk in as this was happening. The consequences not bothering him so much, his curiosity was too delicious.

#☆: hannibal lecter #fragmcntdstars #i promise i won't write him in the kitchen this time lol #that's just his domain he basically lives there #his man... kitchen cave? idk #listening to: nights in white satin by the moody blues

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eb1479 · 1 year

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Big take-away

Chapter 1: Balance within a classroom and a curriculum is incredibly important in order to facilitate the necessary learning and approaches for students of all ability levels and learning styles rather than simply stressing about test scores.

Chapter 7: Providing a menu of choices for students is important, not only speaking in terms of genre but also in terms of how independent reading is expressed throughout the classroom.

Nugget

Chapter 1: “Students need high-quality learning experiences that are differentiated. When we think differentiation, we are reminded that it is more important than the product or materials. We have to differentiate the instructional supports provided for students. We believe that this can occur in efficient and effective ways during balanced literacy instruction, especially during small-group, needs-based learning,” (Fisher 15).

Chapter 7: “Increasing reading volume helps students learn to understand what they are reading, builds reading fluency, and increases their vocabularies. Just like learning to play everything from a piano to basketball, learning to read requires practice. Without sufficient practice, the amazing instruction that you have provided won’t stick. Practice does not make perfect; it makes permanent. And that’s what we’re looking for- readers who develop habits for reading and understanding,” (Fisher 179).

I honestly struggled with getting into the reading to begin with, however once I read the more personal examples of different teachers and their strategies I found myself really soaking up the content. The first thing that I did was read each chapter through and pick out my nuggets of information and the big idea of both readings. I thought that would be helpful to decide what experience I would like to engage with. I then read through the different options for the explorations to pick one that I felt would be simple to incorporate into the two chapters. I then pulled aside my roommate who is a Pre-OT major with a concentration in psychology to discuss an excerpt that I found most interesting out of the two chapters. I discussed Chapter Seven with my roommate so we really engaged with independent reading and her opinions on the nugget quote that I pulled out from it as well as her own opinions on independent reading, “I’ve always loved to read independently, ever since I was younger my parents would encourage me to grab books and either read with them or just by myself. I feel like that really helped me overall because now being in college and having so many readings to do I can easily put myself into that mindset or headspace that I have done since I was really young. That quote is super interesting because I know my vocabulary has benefitted from all of the books that I read when I was younger. It was really obvious when I was in elementary school and reading books like Harry Potter, ”. I was really interested to see her opinions and personal experiences with independent reading from her elementary school years because she is definitely a big book worm and to see the correlation between her early independent reading journey to how she participates in independent reading now was really enlightening. This readerly exploration really helped me get a well-rounded understanding of the effects different independent reading experiences have on children. I feel that I was able to apply the reading content from chapter 7 into a real life example that was not my own.

#sfischer819

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transpidergwen · 2 years

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The Sex Lives of College Girls still prefers spectacle over substance

So, the Sex Lives of College Girls premiere episodes were okay. Nothing problematic, nothing impressive either. It still feels like something is missing. There’s not much of an overarching plot to tie events together and give it a sense of momentum, but it’s not episodic enough for each episode to have a coherent narrative purpose or resolution. Granted these are 2 episodes out of 10, but this was an issue I had last season as well. The episodes are feel less like a cohesive story and more like a collection of short, quippy scenes with the same pop music and wide shots of campus transitions 8 times in a row. It’s very flashy, but it feels more designed to keep us engaged with flashy editing rather than substantive storytelling.

As for the substance, the storylines they’ve set up for this season are fine so far but still feel like they’re missing an emotional depth. Part of this for me is the setting. As it was pointed out in the first five minutes, these characters (other than Kimberly) are extremely rich. That makes Kimberly’s storyline the closest thing to relatable so far, because they all feel so far removed from society that it’s hard to care at all about any day to day obstacles they encounter. That’s unfortunately a result of where the writers decided to set the show, so that might just be a permanent roadblock to my personal investment. Ymmv, that’s fine. But because of that, the big obstacle to the girl’s happiness that these episodes presents is that they...can’t party, and they’re sad about that. That just isn’t compelling for me.

There’s also the characters themselves, which I haven’t been able to connect with at all. The only characters that feel real are Eric and Canan, and for a show with four female leads that seems like a failure of writing. They’re the core of the show, but they still just feel like outlines of characters and not real people. More importantly, they barely feel like friends. They spend a lot of screentime together, but the way the show is paced and written hasn’t allowed them time to slow down and connect with each other. Aside from Kimberly and Leighton it doesn’t feel like they’ve bonded or grown together as a group. They just feel like four roommates who jump from set piece to set piece together. Which isn’t inherently a problem, but without an emotional underpinning that’s all it is, surface level spectacle and popcorn raunch.

The other thing that feels surface level is the way the show approaches “wokeness.” I hate that word because it’s blunt and diminutive of the wider progressive movement, but unfortunately that’s what the show has presented so far. Last season saw some actively harmful treatment of the queer community; the pick-me-gay girlfriend and the way the other girls at the women’s center were treated in-narrative as punchlines was part of a larger, worrisome pattern in how Hollywood has tried to present woke (specifically queer) characters. The show feels like a centrist’s vision of progressive. There’s constant dialogue that beats us over the head with the fact that THIS SHOW IS WOKE, but very little substance to actually back that claim up. Nothing in these premiere episodes felt actively harmful like season one, but with things like the same AOC joke Hollywood has been running for the last 5 years it doesn’t have anything new to say either. They’re trying to reclaim sex positivity, but the way the show revolves around it as if nothing else matters ends up feeling self defeating. In trying to reclaim the raunchy comedies that the guys have had for decades, it ends up feeling like we’re looking through the same lens just with a different presenter. The dialogue and presentation of the show spends too much time defining itself against the patriarchy, rather than leaving it behind and just telling its own story.

And that might be a feature, not a bug, and I’m just looking for something that this show doesn’t intend on offering. But it has the potential to be more, and it’s just frustrating seeing that go unfulfilled.

and thanks to @the-bensolos for their help on this post!

#the sex lives of college girls #tslocg #sex lives of college girls #sex lives of college girls season 2 #sex lives of college girls premiere

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streetsofaesthetics · 2 years

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Eve is close to Sonia and Rosaria but her dynamic with them is very different.

SONIA & EVE.

There’s an almost layered emotional connection with Sonia, although Sonia is simultaneously unlikely to hang out with her for no specific reason other than the fact they have no aligning interests. (Sonia believes there’s a large “age gap” between she and Eve that causes her to be confused and uninterested in the things Eve is. But the truth is...she’s just uninterested in the things Eve is interested in.) When Eve first sees Sonia, she’s intimidated but fascinated. She’s never had to be among a 5′9 woman with heavy tattoos. And because Sonia was femme at the time, when she first met Eve she felt that her femininity was just as performative as her own.

Sure, it was different than Sonia who’s brand of femininity was more like a biker’s girlfriend, but Sonia felt they were one in the same with the way they crafted an image for themselves and downplayed their personalities. But at the same time, Sonia respects women who heavily focus on their fashion and makeup and as a consequence respects the aesthetic Eve has going on. Although Sonia and Sal are a lot alike, Eve decides almost immediately she likes Sonia. (something she does not do with Sal) because she doesn’t make fun of her (Sonia called her fancy when she learned she did ballet/taught kids ballet) and she’s actually pretty calm. Sonia’s visible maturity makes Eve feel comfortable and eventually, as though she can be raw when expressing her frustrations. In the long run, Sonia gets protective of Eve. She hammers down the fact that it’s ok to think people you like should go to hell. It’s okay to tell someone to go fuck themselves. Stop apologizing. It’s the same stuff Sal has already been telling Eve, but because Sonia’s a woman it validates that Eve is able to do this.

Sonia would never say it but Eve somewhat helped her with her own confidence before going butch. All Eve said to her was that she looked better whenever her hair was tied back and appeared short, because she has distinct features that are highlighted more with short hair. Nobody had ever said that to her, and it stuck. There’s a little bit of, just a smidge, of a crush on Eve on Sonia’s behalf that she ignores. ‘Cause Sonia has no intentions of taking Sal’s girlfriend, but after spending a hour talking to her about deep stuff™️ she thinks to herself that she can understand why Sal, or anyone, would love her. She hopes she can find someone who makes her happy like Eve makes Sal happy.

ROSARIA & EVE

Rosaria is on every level, Eve’s friend. And by the time they’re 40-something, they’re best friends who drink wine and cry together and sleep in the living room together.

Sonia and Eve don’t have the same interests. Yet Rosie and Eve largely connect because of their interests in wellness, their age range, and the fact they function on similar emotional planes.

Eve and Rosie have incredibly similar worries and mindsets, the only difference is Eve is more inward with her anxiety and Rosie is outward, and because of that Eve can compare them and hold empathy. She especially behaves affectionate and reassuring when they’re in their 20s and Rosie has moments if she wonders about saying the wrong thing or if she upset Eve in any way. And although Rosie can be a motormouth (or someone who sends you 5 rapid texts if you give her attention) Eve finds this easy to handle because Rosie isn’t as talkative when hyper fixating on other things. So it’s not a friendship where Eve feels forced to CONSTSNTLY talk and engage with her. Similarly, they would be good roommates because Rosaria would either

Be at work all the time.

Be at college all the time.

Hole herself up in her room for hours at a time.

And Eve has all that delicious solitude to herself. Even if they’re together in the same room, comfortable silences occur. And if Eve has no idea what to talk about, Rosie somehow and someway brings up some kind of topic that Eve can follow along with.

They don’t realize it but they also get along well because they were sheltered (in different ways) since Eve’s grandfather infantilized her while Sal and Sonia still treat Rosaria was a baby just because she was born last. Because they both know how it feels to be smothered and bossed around by family, they respect each other’s boundaries.

They’re the sort of friends who have never argued. Been annoyed with each other? Sure, but it’s minor because they respect each other too much.

Had they met each other as kids they would have been best friends who traded toys and made up soap operas for their plastic ponies. However Rosaria would have never would have wanted Eve to date Sal, compared to how Rosaria is happy that she more or less gets acquainted to Eve through Sal.

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feuqueerfire · 16 days

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Sleep With Me Live Blogging

My first Filipino show. I would’ve thought it would be Gaya Sa Pelikula since it’s held in such high regard and I’ve had it in my To Watch for so long but idk, I wanna try this one.

Ep 1 (Sept 3)

wow I don’t have this downloaded but am using my data to watch it during lunch because of upgraded phone plan data. such luxury

[Linguistics] Interesting language experience tbh. I’m not fluent in any of the EA/SEA languages of the shows I watch but I have some understanding of Korean and I’ve watched enough shows in Thai, Japanese, and Mandarin that I have a grasp of the cadence as well as some nuances/honorifics/some basic words etc. However, I have no experience with Tagalog (I assume that’s what they’re speaking) so I don’t know any words/honorifics/cadence etc BUT they’re only speaking that like half the time. The other half is English which I’m fluent in. So it’s a strange experience where in Korean I might be understanding 30-40% of what Im hearing based on my level of Korean and my inferencing skills but here, I’m understanding 30-40% completely clearly (English) but not at alllll of anything else. Also spanish? but idk any of that either

This is really good so far, I’m engaged in the story and curious about what’s gonna happen. This ep was mostly about Luna and her sleep problems/break up with ex/being emotionally available and apparently not a good friend

Ep 2 (Sept 3)

Harry is gonna look through her ex’s stuff in her free time for free?!

so are they siblings? or just roommate-friends

lmfaoo bitchy girls are your type, dumb boys are your type. i love you gay lesbian friendships

rip the guy’s gf treating Harry like a little zoo attraction

okay, Kai is indeed Harry’s brother. glad his crush likes him lol

ahh cute cute cute I was on the bus while watching but my feet were like tapping bc i couldn’t react otherwise (and i was smiling big, that’s an advantage of masking fr)

This ep focused more on Harry, I was indeed hoping that we’d alternatingly focus on the girls

Ep 3 (Sep 3)

kinda losing my mind at how Cute their endearing their awkward and fumbling interaction is. why does it feel so real omg

ahh Luna’s situation of being told to exert herself more when she’s already trying hard and has a sleep condition is so frustrating

Wendy’s so cute doing her homework on the shelf

ahhh Belle being at the restaurant and revealing that Harry actually hated the place before omg esp bc it’s not PWD-friendly

ooh kiss! even tho it’s very chaste

Ep 4 (Sep 4)

omg it’s starting with sex scene but I can’t see shit bc of the sun in this bus and also I don’t want other people to see my screen lol

lol the pants scene

ahhh bringing down panties is crazy

Oh, is Luna noticing the ways that Kai helps Harry + Belle has in the past helped Harry and wondering what she can do/how she can measure up

ahh, Luna so cute with accidentally saying i love you and then rolling on bed + Harry teasing her a bit about it the next day

this time Harry wipes Luna’s mouth

Ep 5 (Sep 4)

the penultimate episode angst and breakup nooooo but they set it up well so that we could see the points where they are struggling to meet in the middle/places of tensions/situations that went wrong etc

the breakup scene was sad af

Ep 6 (Sep 4)

plsssss I love Luna crying about the breakup to Wendy while drinking and Wendy laughing at her

ah, they're going on with their lives separately and with new/old friends (Wendy-Luna is sooo fun).

cute little reunion and circling back with the giggly convo at the same restaurant + "wanna go on a date with me?"

I think it’s so interesting how Luna has mentioned a few times caring for Harry or not being able to and Harry is like wtf don’t think of me that way because she’s averse to being seen as a charity case/burden/dependant who is fragile but Luna has followed it up with we all need care/need someone to worry about us.

Overall:

A great introduction to Filipino media for me! It's short (like 2 hours total probably) but didn't feel cramped, the girls were fleshed out individual characters and I enjoyed seeing them come together. I also liked their relationships with other people like Luna's fun friendship with Wendy + Harry's dynamic with her brother. They were both disabled in different ways and we saw how it affected their lives both with the outside world but also with each other. Very cute and endearing, felt very natural.

Rating: 6.5/10

#sleep with me #ep by ep commentary

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haloburns · 2 months

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⭐

Here's a star for the director's commentary thingy :3 Excited to see what you pick to talk about

aww thank you!!

IM GONNA TALK ABOUT GHOST LIGHT

(for those of u new here, ghost light is my danny phantom oc ship, consisting of danny and mateo. mateo is my pfp)

so i started this angsty au series of my own series, right?? it started with a half-assed christmas fic that i speed wrote christmas eve and then abandoned. then like.... a little over a year later, i get this idea for an au and realize it's THEE perfect prequel to this christmas fic. so i start dabbling with it in between other projects and i fully intend to finish it before i post it because it's not THAT big a deal, and very few people actually follow me for my oc content ANYWAY but in march of this year i was like "okay. that's it. i need validation!!!" so i posted the first two chapters

then i decided i was burnt out from writing danny phantom stuff due to lack of engagement and jumped over to legend of zelda (pack server my beloved) and have spent the last few months recovering over there. except every time i plan on working on my next update for one of my fics over there, i end up with this fic again. EVERY. TIME.

"this isn't what i really want" is based on the idea that things would've played out differently if danny and mateo hadn't been roommates to begin with. the idea that "what if danny and mateo weren't roommates? what if danny was already ghost king? what if mateo never found out that danny was phantom?" drove the idea, but unfortunately, those two are like barbies i smush together magnets that can't be drawn away, and i realized that them having a "we're just friends :)" kind of relationship while fuckin nasty and pretending no one can tell was EXACTLY the vibe i wanted. this is one of those frustrating fics because everything would be solved IF THEY JUST TALKED TO EACH OTHER but their own fears keep them from being honest

which is why i like the title so much bc the context changes as the fic goes on and i am a slut for that shit

MORE DETAILS UNDER THE READ MORE BC THIS GOT LONG LMAO

it was only supposed to be a few chapters long, MAYBE 20k, and now i'm looking at 8 chapters, roughly 45k. AND I HAVE ACTUALLY PLANNED THE ENDING AND HAVE IT ALMOST COMPLETELY FINISHED!!!

but my favorite part about writing this fic has just been like... playing around with narrative stuff. the first chapter happens over the course of like. ten minutes. and it's so super gay and yearning and poetic. then the second chapter like. zooms through the night until danny and mateo are in an alcove all but fucking. then we jump to chapter three and get a deeper insight into these variations' minds and i reveal the level of dumbassery to be expected from this fic lmao i've also had a lot of fun pulling pieces from other fics i've written/published to tie together and change their context! they're fun little nods to my other works and has been such a fun exercise in "okay. so they do x because of y... but what if i change y to z, what would they do then???"

and then chapter four!! i actually have a completely different version that i originally intended to use, but as i got to the end of chapter 3, i realized, they would not fucking do that. so i recontextualized what i'd written and it turned into a whole different beast, once again showcasing the boys' whole fucking dumbassery on display for literally EVERYONE EXCEPT THEMSELVES TO SEE i just really loved them playing in the morning while continuing to delude themselves that This Meant Nothing to either of them

chapter five was actually not supposed to be entirely from luke's pov but it turned out to work best for pushing the story through more time quickly, and to also see the boys from an (mostly) outside perspective to showcase just how STUPID they're being. the conversations mirrored each other almost exactly but in ways unique to each of them that was so much fun to play with. luke and danny's relationship is much more antagonistic sibling-coded than luke and mateo's. luke is definitely filling the older sibling role for both of them, but in danny's case, he already has a meddling older sister, so his and luke's relationship follows that same pattern. luke is fine with that, he has that relationship with some of his sisters in both directions (he's the middle and only boy). but with mateo, he's the oldest, so he revels in the soft guiding older sibling advice luke gives him, and it's SO OBVIOUS in this chapter. danny and luke shouting and throwing things at each other whereas luke and mateo having a softer conversation, although both of them culminate in the same advice: just talk to him. then ofc we finish with jamie and luke talkin about his tendency to meddle and we get to see a silent peek at danny and mateo's relationship when others aren't watching which is just... so precious to me

now my plans for the last three chapters...... rubs hands together with an evil grin

so i never intended this fic to be as in depth as the main series, so chapter six jumps to the end of the year. end of the year celebration that ends in a "last night on earth" kind of deal with danny and mateo, and it's fuckin RAUNCHY but i'm really proud of it. dunno how it ends yet (maybe that's what my writer's block is... maybe if i figure out where i'm going, then i'll be able to finish it) it's... mostly just lots of gay pining while being rawed lmao

but then i realized nothing interesting happens in sophomore and junior years that would be worth mentioning, bc there's not ghost shenanigans that anyone else is involved with, so i decided to just.... skip forward lmao and i did it in THEE funniest style imaginable: a glee recap. it's literally titled "here's what you missed last time on..." and then there's an actual glee style recap where vanessa runs through the big events and we get some glee-recap quotes and end on an open ending.

then i proceed to cram the events of one year into a single chapter. the plan is danny and mateo get caught goin at it during a party, but they don't remember being visible. so mateo's confused when everyone is congratulating him on finally getting together with danny and he panics. and ends the relationship. this is like...late october?? so he and danny avoid each other until break. then break happens, they come back and mateo meets tony.

so, those of you who've read the main series will know the name Tony. he is a bitch. he hurts danny (emotionally) but he's not really a bad guy. he's just kind of a dick. he serves as an emotional flashpoint for ghost light in the original fic, and he does here as well, but this time it's slightly more passive?? and gentle?? i actually LIKE him this time lmao

the fic ends in an unsatisfying way, and that's on purpose. danny and mateo make amends for one final night, the night before graduation, but after that... they don't say anything and continue on like they have been. so they move away and drift apart and don't see each other again... until the christmas fic, which is hallmark levels of ridiculousness lmao

AND I'M SO CLOSE TO FINISHING THIS FIC!! i'm done with chapter 7, and chapters 6 & 8 are in their final acts. i'm gonna post them all at once and then turn my attention to finishing the hallmark fic!! i just... really love this story. i love getting to play with the characters and motivations and their ties to each other, how different things might've been if things had happened just a little differently, even if it is with my own work. there are like. seven people who give a shit about mateo and the stories i'm telling with him, and they keep me going with these fics!! writing in a fandom that actually gives praise and feedback makes it easier to work on my mateo stories, and whether the pack knows it or not, they're the reason i'm able to even CONSIDER finishing this story and i'm so grateful for that

BUT I'LL BE DONE NOW BC THIS IS ALREADY SO FUCKING LONG LMAO

thank you for giving me the opportunity to scream about this fic bc so far, only my sister has heard me yell about it and i figure she's due for a break LMAO

#halo talks #ask game #ghost light #danny phantom #my ocs #my au #my head's to blame for all my heart's mistakes verse #this isn't what i really want au #shout out to cosmic (sister) and lawless (loml) for letting me yell about mateo at any and all hours #and of course the biggest shout out to my beloved evren for loving mateo just as ferally as i do

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