#dying kill me etc
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if my manager treats me like a kid again I’m killing
I feel like I’m dyingggg
#camera talks#I Am a minor but I’m the longest lasting crew member#I’ve technically had my job position longer than herrrr#she is the most draining and exhausting person to work with most of the time and I fucking hate that she’s a good boss with-#giving days off sometimes bc otherwise I would quit and get a better job but I need the hours and the specific days off#so I don’t have better around here :///#but she’s insufferable!!!!#treat me like you do all the other crew members I fucking swear !#it’s awful awful awful and I’m so so tired#I legit don’t even have the energy to cry about it lmao#and I haven’t been going on tumblr bc I don’t have the energy for that either??#like I Know where my energy is (period) but where is my energy :(#whatervrrrr#dying kill me etc
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ark aftermath
#being in the ark with knives who had gathered such immense power definitely fucked with vash's brain#their fight before the ark haunts me. what do you mean 'blackness of decay' jesus christ#it reminds me of 'youve got more of them...scars'#knives seeing that his brother is actively like. dying.#also what do u mean knives tried to merge with him. that definitely took a toll on both of them#anyway so vash has vivid hallucinations of his brother and whatnot#wolfwood hates himself for that obviously#just imagine the horror he would experience if vash called him 'knives'#vash literally spitting blood because 1) anxiety 2) hes so fucking tired and tortured and shit#he wants a break guys give him a break#but ooobviously vash (the man he is) he'll never accuse wolfwood of trapping him in the ark. of betraying him etc#so he'll just be happy to be there alive and relatively well and hope the same for his brother#at least for the time being before vash meets him and kills him#this is the longest comic ive made sorry if it feels a bit rushed/not well concluding#best i can do#its been kicking my ass for the past week and i just wanted to be done w it#trigun#vashwood#vash the stampede#nicholas d. wolfwood#trigun maximum#trigun fanart#my art#millions knives#<- for a fragment of a second#what else#tw hallucinations#tw blood#tw emetophobia
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i finished my game.
#hypnospace outlaw#hypnospace outlaw spoilers#dylan merchant#hypnospace#hypnospace outlaw fanart#art#artists on tumblr#firm believer in dylan dying after his confession btw. that guilt ate at him i just know#creation killing creator or something. can anyone hear me#i hate him so much i need him to die ten more times over. he's my favourite guy. i'm hitting him with my car. skrunkly. etc
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when it comes to being willing to make concessions on methods & morality specifically in exchange for gaining batman’s trust & access to the inner bat circle vs rejecting an existing trust & access (because it did exist prior to jason’s death & would have existed had he chosen to walk back in with no radically opposing beliefs after lost days #1)….jason should never choose the first
#re: op’s tags on lrb. but once again this is unrelated to the actual post. It just reminded me#worded it this way bc jason could maybe give up killing maybe. but not for the bats. it doesn’t work bc he made the choice to#not return as a bat and he hasn’t finished justifying that choice yet. in fact it all falls apart if he makes concessions for them now#but whether he’s wrong or right and what he thinks abt that is irrelevant. he made a choice and he’s got to stick by it when it comes to#renouncing an important part of his ideology since his resurrection just for them#the point isn’t the killing itself but whether jason would be see the bats as a good enough exchange for giving up his ideology#and he clearly didn’t the first time he chose to kill (and at that time he was remembering a father that was much more loving than bruce#has been since jason’s death. an older brother who was more supportive than dick currently is — bc well. Jason isn’t doing stuff he Can#support currently lol— and etc) the point is that Jason looked at what is to him the better version of his family and still chose to severe#himself from them (or maintain/exacerbate the severance. since his dying was the initial separation) so why would he go back on it all#these tags should’ve been worded better and also part of the post. I’ll do that sometime when im not sleepy#actually the first is what helena does and it never quite works bc the bats don’t generally grant her the trusted status that most#newcomers are able to attain. and mostly that’s on batman. this isnt even what the post is about#so easily now#jason todd
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Most Sherlock Holmes adaptations I've seen tend to place their Final Problem towards the mid point of the series (or even a bit earlier) - it's also in my opinion the best way of going about it, so you have time enough for the characters to adjust after the reunion but they know each other well enough for the events of Fina to be devastating.
Sherlock & Co is done with 20 of the adventures. How many are there? Fifty-something? Almost sixty? Let's say we'll be entering mid-point territory after the 25th story.
So let's pretend for a moment that we have 5 more stories until The Final Problem. Ok.
Estimating an adventure at 3 episodes each, that would mean little over 3 months - maybe 3 and a half? Starting, of course, from the end of Sign of Four, which will be somewhere in December.
So let's say 3, maybe 4 months into 2025. That would be, what? Late march, early april?
Early april?
John having to tell the listeners that Sherlock is dead, in early april?
Quick calendar searck reveals what I was praying it would - the 1st of april will be on a Tuesday next year.
So what I'm saying
What I'm saying is Sherlock &Co has the opportunity to do the funniest fucking thing
#fyi I don't mean John pranks us about Sherlock dying#i mean it's just the first Tuesday after sherlock “dies” so that's just when he happens to tell the listeners#maybe he's not even aware of the date#and is surprised to see the reactions are less “oh my god oh no” and more “haha good one” or “funny but actually don't joke about that”#ahhh and then he'd have to double down either on the 2nd or next Tuesday and explain again that his best friend is actually dead#oh that would hurt but it would also be absolutely hilarious#for us who know Sherlock's not actually dead#anywayy#for the record i don't actually think they'll do fina as early as april#(but wouldn't it be funny)#They might do it at the actual midpoint#after the 29th story so let's say june/ july#Hoping they don't place it too late cuz then we won't have enough time to see how it affects all of them#Even if it's around the 3/4 point i think I'd be a bit bummed#Also midpoint is a good place to take a break#Of course fear nr 1 is leaving it for the very end and making empt the last episode#and the reason why the podcast ends is “look what happened if it wasn't for the podcast maybe Moriarty wouldn't have noticed Sherlock”#Like a “it's becoming too dangerous” thing#but that's the evil timeline (not us!!!)#Honestly if it were me I'd make fina the midpoint.... then hiatus...... return...... second half......#and then get another big dangerous villain for the last few eps#Maybe one of them (sherlock) almost gets killed (again) and that's why john decides that#it's been swell but we're ending the podcast cause apparently we're putting (too big of) a target on our backs#Almost lost sherlock again the risks outweigh the benefits etc etc#Of course they'll keep solving crimes together just stop broadcasting them to the world#And that's how I'd do it! :D#God i can't be trusted with tags#If you read this far I love you#sherlock & co#theories
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Is this anything? I was going to make more analytical orv posts but this happened instead
Get it? It's a metaphor
#orv#kim dokja#omniscient reader's viewpoint#kdj#your welcome#i make me laugh#this works on many levels#im annoying so im explaining#Those one posts where its like kdj is jesus kdj is you kdj is a metaphor#You put the killing thing right between your lips but you dont give it the power to kill pls stop dying#etc#joongdok
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Wait a damn minute, hetalia fan that follows you for DC content here, YOU'RE the one from the Hetalia is Real post????
lol yep that’s me! the Hetalia Is Real guy
#also known as the dying in space dream guy the hope poem guy the wistfulposting on yearning dot com guy#the tumblr: ‘you just gestured to all of me’ httyd guy#the ‘my entire confidence in my artistic ability’ -> ‘people keysmashing in the tags’ meme guy the dipping mac and cheese guy#the ‘antonio fetch me your most talented rats’ guy#the ‘love language is acts of service and all i know how to do is kill’ guy#etc and so on#my online footprint is unhinged and impossible to cohere into a recognizable brand and thus cannot tangibly benefit me in any way whatsoever#but boy do i know how to make a viral post apparently#Tragic: local tumblr funnyman (derogatory) only ever wanted to be a fanartist#splashasks#anonymous
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bearer of the curse (loving the taste of spicy foods but having zero spice tolerance to speak of)
#I have a fucky wucky tongue that kills me instantly with both spicy and sour foods#geographic tongue momence 👍 to live is to suffer#especially when I am experiencing a culture that has DELICIOUS food but the VAST MAJORITY of it is spicy.#funny story though me dying in the middle of a restaurant due to it got us free food there. So like#it has its uses I suppose LMAO#(was not planned - We asked for no spice but got spicy. I Died on impact. Was noticeable enough that the staff#who did not speak much English#were giving me extra water and making sure I was okay jfkebfkdfnfj)#The agonies! Etc#the food here is so good honestly I just also have to suffer through it 👍#clamtalk
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"D'you think she cares?" His voice came across as a little worse for wear than it oughta. Death usually restored the body to peak order aside from a few scars, but here Martyn's throat was, scratchy and harder to parse than he woulda liked.
"What?" Came the reply. Scott shook his hand out, dirt particulates separating from his fingers as he did.
"Cleo, I mean. Obviously." Martyn laughed, leaning back against Scott's pretty little house, hand waving in a mockery of one of Scott's common gestures.
"Why would I know what Cleo thinks of you? We aren't teammates this go around." Scott turns back to his work, but it's still obvious how the previous victor felt about this game by how his voice catches at 'go around'.
Martyn winces, but he shakes it off within milliseconds. "You two are always allies! There hasn't been a go when you two haven't been conspiring. I'm asking because--"
"Martyn." Scott's voice was sharper than he meant, and it softens as he continues. "For one, I won't ask how you know more about mine and Cleo's relationship than either of us have told you. You and Grian get so clammy about that nonsense. For two, she hasn't mentioned you."
Martyn doesn't flinch, but Scott can tell that hurt him. Scott lived with him for a while, he knows. Martyn thinks himself infinitely cool and collected, but he isn't. He never has been and Scott's pretty sure he never will be. The blonde coughs. "Cool."
"Cool?" Scott laughs, looking up. Arcing underneath his hair from his right temple under his hair and around his throat is a lightning scar, and it glows slightly at the middle of his throat in a cool cyan. It aches. Martyn knows it aches, especially when Scott laughs. "Martyn, you were soulbound two goes ago. I know she's cool and all, but what's your hangup? Are you this hung up on Ren? Me?"
"What! Scott, you're having a giraffe. I don't get hung up on people."
There is a poignant silence. Martyn shifts uncomfortably. Scott rolls his eyes and returns to his work.
"Scott, I just wanna know how she is. If she ever thinks about me. I don't--I try not to think about it. The past, I mean. But it just... I may die but the soul lives on. Bones are buried but the soul is still here and it still feels that little string, y'know? We had the same soul, for a while. The same beating heart." Martyn finally moves from his ramrod straight stance, squatting beside Scott, a gloved hand extended.
The palm is cold. Ice fucking cold. The diamond shaped mark seems to give his flesh freezerburn as he nears the scar to any other living being. Any that are around, anyway. Martyn is cagey about it--Scott wasn't being mean. He has four of those diamonds across his body, though he supposes he's lucky that they're all... eh, relatively easy to hide. The one on his cheek, the back of his neck, and right over his heart were harder to conceal, though. That, and the massive ragged timepiece seemingly slashed across his back. The scar that never healed. The reminder to keep his ears open. To listen. To betray when it suits him. That one still pulses red, sore and obvious.
Scott doesn't know that a diamond burns for him as Martyn nears him. He doesn't know that it gets a little harder to breathe as the scalding diamond on the back of his neck makes itself very known. Bound, again and again, had he always found himself following after another? Hitching his soul into pieces again and again? Where would a diamond appear this time, for Jimmy? Where else would the cracks spread? Scott flicks his nose.
"You're absolutely doing that thing again where you just stare at me and look pensive. Fine, you want to know so bad what I think they think? Fine, if it'll get you to either go away or help me plant." Scott finally stands up fully and stretches his back out, then his arms high above his head. He reaches over to grasp Martyn's upper arm. "Cleo is a complicated person. They do care. They also don't. You aren't the center of her universe and that is fine. For both of you. Worrying about what they think won't make you less afraid of what comes next. Holding onto us--me, Cleo, the Ahaliance, Ren, that won't give you the peace you're looking for. You and Grian hold on tighter to the past than the rest of us. Let us go, Martyn, and let what joy you can have now happen."
The diamond hurts like hell. Like Martyn has slammed back into a pool of lava and it is eating him alive. It feels like dying when Scott holds his arm. He doesn't react. Scott doesn't know everything. "Alright, alright, I don't need an intervention here, mate! I'm genuinely just trying to see if she's mad at me, and you're talking different breeds and stronger memories. Bah. Maybe you're holding on to Cleo."
"Am I, then?" Scott snorts, and thankfully releases Martyn's arm. The burning subsides, somewhat.
"I think you are, honestly. I look away and suddenly you're gaslighting and gatekeeping and girlbossing! What about my gaslighting?" Martyn holds a hand to his chest as he fakes haughtiness.
"You're a bad liar, Littlewood." Scott kneels back in the dirt. "Now help me plant before you go back to our canary."
Martyn snorts, this time. "Our canary. Yeah, Scott, only me and Grian hold on." He does listen, though, and helps cover wheat seeds with dirt. As his right hand connects with the soil, it aches like a red winter, cold and bloody. He misses Ren. He misses Cleo, and Pearl, and Mumbo and everyone. He feels like there's a world where they could have been happy together, where they played games and laughed around Christmastime. As he looks at Scott, he wonders...
"Do you know what Christmas is?" His voice is more hesitant than he means for it to be.
"No, why?" Scott replies, shoving half a tuber deep into the earth.
"No reason. Just an old story." Then, that was the difference. He and Grian knew there was something beyond. No one else remembers what life extant a Watcher's game is like. He raises his head to watch the darkening horizon. Scott boxes his ear with a smile, and he shrugs. At least they have tonight to pretend like She wasn't watching. Like they were friends planting a field.
#dont ask me what this is. i dont know. anyway have some headcanons abt both martyn and the victors in gen#each victor gets a scar based on what killed them post everyone else dying <3 pearl has burn scars#grian has a fuck ton of scars from where bone moght have pierced skin when his bones Bropke#very gnarly#martyn and grian both have extra scars though from Things.#bigb and ren also have extra scars because i like them#most folks lose all scars they didnt have session 1 of season 1! ie scars scars were there originally so they stay and arent weird#n every time someone dies they also get a scar from that death that go away next season#soulbonds each get the same scars etc etc#inthelittlewood#i guess?#scott smajor#secret life smp spoilers#secret life smp#trafficblr#traffic smp
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for each man kills the thing he loves
Oedipus murders Laïus, Joseph Blanc / The Ghost of Banquo, Théodore Chassériau + Seven Against Thebes, Aeschylus / High Infidelity, Taylor Swift / The Fallen Angel, Alexandre Cabanel / eurydice, Sarah Ruhl / Revenge of the Sith (2005) + eurydice, Sarah Ruhl / Giselle’s death, performed by the Northern Ballet / Kill Bill, Sza / The Count of Monte Cristo (2002) / Hilarion’s death, performed by Ballet Manila + eurydice, Sarah Ruhl + Odette’s death, performed by the Royal Ballet / Macbeth, William Shakespeare
#web weaving#i looked up the story of Giselle and was so distraught at how this poor Hilarion guy ended up dying#And it made me interested in like. People killing or otherwise destroying things or people or ideas that they (should’ve could’ve etc) love#but yeah as a result there’s a lot of these quotes that have further context#Anyways this was about#anakin skywalker#before I realized it was about him#Web weaving#I mean it’s an old question. Is the murder an act of love? Hm. It was love up until then though and all that
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averi and i played old school xbox minecraft last night on multiplayer survival mode and i haven’t played survival minecraft since i was in middle school (and i never played it well) so i died like six times no joke and i kept spawning further and further away from our house so i was just wandering around in the woods being attacked by wolves
#also i dropped my map and sheep shears rhat took averi a while to make i felt so bad#he was mostly crafting stuff building the house and farming and i was ‘exploring’ (dying) to try and get enough wool for beds#and cutting down trees for wood and killing shit for food etc#it was fun when i had a map#it was funny tho bcuz every time id die 3 times in a row and be like can this get any worse it would immediately start raining#i think she put it on easy for me too and i still kept dying#AND I KEPT FALLING IN HOLES#i am not a gamer. i don’t know if he even died once#it actually plays minecraft and i .. do not
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dear gods i adore horror tbh but i am way too sensitive to it
#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚#idk how to describe 'sensitive' rn i'm dying in the head i should be asleep but Man!!!!!#i search up tons of horror stuff for funsies. movies uhh creepypastas stories real life events etc. fun!#BUT it freaks me out wayyy too much. bcs i really don't deal well w Those feelings of paranoia.#my imagination too good i was scared at night going to sleep bcs i'd imagine what to do if an intruder came in from the bedroom door#or bathroom door and think of how i'd escape Death.........#Did Not Help my area before was kinda yk. chillax. chillax meaning grassy tree-sy backyard overgrown trees#old-ish in a filipino chill neighborhood that isn't very fancy ?????? idk.#and the fact one time my dad almost died and someone standing close to him Did die so. haha. traumatized from that.#I WASN'T THERE..... but i rmbr my dad coming home and the news absolutely terrified me. anyway!#wow... rambling on tumblr at 3 and a half am... Nostalgic.#anyway yeah i love love love horror stuff but i am !!! so bad w them !!! like jesus christ i adore resident evil and bloodborne#is my whole bloodline. or something. but i can't even watch my twin kill 1 zombie in a re game Demo (she can't do it either)#and i can only make it to killing the first monster in bloodborne and explore a tiny bit where there are still no enemies. god.#AAAGGGGHHHhhhh ... and the first point of horror in omori then i stop playing for months...... even tho i rlly wna play more :((#2024 ........ cmon... i will try to overcome my fears more.#i've improved somewhat at least! ...from when i was younger. like. man. i could never stay in night-time in games ever.#ffxv? nah i always have to travel at morning. only when i got strong enough that daemons were nothing to me did i stop#getting scared. ouuughhh... and i always try to be stealthy in games........... for many reasons ofc but 1. Scared#okay i shut up now. apollo rambles of tonight: done and over!
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i have a weird relationship with weight because i hated eating more than anything the moment i was ready for solids ( i hate chewing with my entire life always have & will ) which made me underweight for most of my life ( to this day ) & during late primary-middle school this made me actively suicidal because i felt like something was wrong with my sex because i just was not developing whatsoever prompting me to have a years long phase of trying to gain weight in any way i could ( #EPICFAIL by the way ) & i was already insecure but i felt seriously so unforgivably ugly after bullying not just at school but by adults of my entourage. but then i did in my late 15s which prompted the pendulum to swing in the other direction & suddenly i FREAKED OUT & thought well being skinny is pretty much all i have & know myself to be & clearly it is not going to last forever so i Better preserve it i was delusional about how skinny i thought i was actually i look stumpy & weird i have to prove myself. But now i am normal again kind of
#also i used to get beaten to finish my food nearly daily & it would take me forever to do that like literally hours with no exaggeration#just made me hate eating even more. now my technique is eating as fast as possible before i even realize how overwhelming#the sensory experience is & i can just be done with it VS the pain&dread of eating slowly -> disgust of Everything+hyperawareness#eating tightens my muscles like i hate it so fucking much catching the food putting it in my mouth CHEWING swallowing#what a damn chore#so i always liked cheese it was my “safe food” pretty much the only thing i liked#i even hated the foods autists usually like like fries & fried chicken meatballs ETC. HATED.#i was/am more of a soup & turning all my food into varieties of Slop kind of girl nothing hard for me please...#i experienced middle school during the like ♯Thick era of the world which was honestly a good thing like for The Populace#but i felt like killing myself because i felt like an unforgivable fugly genetic failure & people did not hesitate to let me know#anyway either way i would be unhappy caus if i did gain weight during puberty i would have a meltdown about all the Changes#so i feel content for the time being about only losing the fat in my face & getting age appropriate wrinkles really#trying to enjoy the privilege of thinness while i have it because it will not last forever 0_0 but that should not matter anyway...#the privilege of thinness: being way uglier than others & constantly looking like a gibbon dying of disease + no energy or strength ever#JK people are much MUCH nicer to thin people & they do things for me on account of looking physically incapable so um yay i guess#light at the end of the tunnel that is very significant in the grand scheme of things socially. ♯CountingMyBlessings#also i was raised on ♯HAES tumblr from 2014-2018 i truly believed in that & was so damn envious i was not curvy & beautiful LOL#so i never hated overweight people really i think for the most part the SJW tumblr values stuck with me#but now i know it depends on your base frame & genetics & there is no guarantee to what you choose to do (naturally) acceptance is peace#sorry for the gigantic Arse post i just needed to get that off my chest for a long time. not on here specifically just in general#oh & i am a ♯Grignoteuse but grignoter (grazing) is different from eating in my mind&body#& my insecurity was not a result of wanting to fit in really but kind of in the sense that i wanted people to stop berating me for my looks#like body wise only & also not understanding why every other girl looked like a girl blossoming into a woman#& i looked like i was transitioning to Malnourished (unsexed) Ape made worse by bein GNC.& like the need for control later on & erthang ETC
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having senna refa feels tonight
#MY daughter#ugh she makes me so fucking sad#such a tragic beautiful character#and shes from the EXTENDED CANON#imagine losing both of your parents within a year#and judging by the last remaining member of your house comment she lost all her family#like her WHOLE family was either killed disgraced etc#and in comes londo who takes you in and cares for you bc hes guilty for BOTH OF YOUR PARENTS DYING#and what do you do?#STAY WITH HIM UNTIL HE DIES???#what the fuck#at least you get to be with the sweetest man on the planet literally and ur the empress now#man also i just realized her with the jaddo kids in in the beginning is crazy bc well#the whole reason she has those kids is bc HER WHACK ASS FATHER disgraced those kids house#INSANE!!! INSANE#i love all the centauri family shit and all the crazy contradictions that come up when well#rivals end up marrying and taking care of each other and ADOPTING each other#like a REFA kept londo from killing himself for years bc of how much he cared abt her#saving her is like saving all of centauri prime#LIKE DO U UNDERSTAND#i wish she was a character in the show so bad
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finally beat the first kingdom in p5t the other day and it was truly flabbergasting the way marie fuckin. dissolved. and morgana was like well that shouldn't have caused a mental shutdown... but i don't know for sure! and then moved on. LIKE HUH. WHY ARE NONE OF THE THIEVES. ACKNOWLEDGING THIS. LMAO?
#bobtalk#p5tposting#p5t spoilers#i guess. for the first dungeon. lol#its like well if it was akc i'd understand but it's whiplash because over and over the thieves are normally like#well....this palace Looks bad. but we should scope out how things are in the real world before we take action! they're generally cautious#and they're stuck here so obviously that's not an option right. like they were going to fight marie eventually no matter what#but they're like *shrugs* about any potential real world consequences to girlie disappearing like that it's really...weird?#i mean. even with kamoshida they only went through with trying to steal his heart because they were desperate and willing to risk him dying#bc they didn't know for sure bc they were new to this but it was better than the alternative. etc. iirc at least.#i'm aware this is a silly spin off this is just. really funny to me? unusual? that the game is like. 'don't even worry about it <3'#like guys i think you might've just killed a woman <- i know she's going to be fine. because they wouldn't do that. but LMAO can u IMAGINE#(anyway barelyyy started the second kingdom (as in. we made it to the first battle and haven't started). are all the rulers just going to b#ppl toshiro has beef with personally. because that's really fucking funny if so. his whole GC hates his ass!)
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prev post a bit different but this is also how ppl act abt anythinggg they did in 2020. like i see soooo many ppl being like “haha remember when we all changed our pronouns and went by bug or arson lollll!!!��� like its some funny quirky thing and not like. a lot of ppls real lives. like they see being trans and especiallyyyy being gnc or nonbinary as just a cringe trend that some ppl never grew out of
#mostly on tiktok/reels this happens#but like ong ppl r so fucking boring. like if a girl shows pics of here w dyed hair and peircinhs etc ppl in the comments r lik#‘lolll okayy moss he/they/bug’ ILL KILL U#im glad so many ppl got to experiement w gender in 2020. and im glad that many ppl realised it wasnt for them#but its sick to mock the ppl who it ISNT and never was a trend for#i will never ever get taken seriously as a trans person for msny reasons. and whatever its ok#but it just pisses me offfffff. like ppl think its so funny. ur so boring#also unrelated but more tiktok weirdness#rlly funny seeing ppl try to act like their tiktok music taste is sooooo niche and nobody gets it#when they r TRENDING AUDIOS and get played on the radio daily#saw ppl trying to gatekeep chsrli xcx 😭😭😭😭 GET REALLLLL
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