#drag queen storytime

[etakeh]

Well fuck.

I hate people so much.

Present company excepted, unless you're one of the people who causes this kind of thing to be cancelled, then I'm back to hate.

Anyone looking for something to do on Sunday?

June 11 2023.

Tigard. OR. Portland metropolitan area.

[fixing-bad-posts]

[Image description: A tumblr post, edited blackout-poetry style to read, "children need to be exposed to drag."]

---

children need to be exposed to drag

[terry-the-shark]

I'm back from a trip to France (so now I'll post more again lol) and like, obviously a lot of things are different, like language and so forth (I did manage to speak multiple coherent sentences in French, I'm so proud (basically just "I would like 2 baguettes please" and "do you have a thing without gluten" lol)), but one thing in particular struck me that I didn't expect. I saw police officers here and there, walking around, chilling, going on their laptops in a hotel foyer for some reason I don't want to know (all unusual enough bc the police do fuckall in my town) - with, like, guns. It probably sounds odd to this American ass website but it genuinely really shocked and frightened me. Like obviously it's a thing I'm aware of in theory, but seeing it in person made it very real - that there is a weapon for hurting people. You're walking around in public (next to a kids play area in one case!) with a machine that murders people.

[primalspice]

OC-TOBER DAY 05: LACE

region zero's most qualified transvestite

[eraofecholalia]

Posting tiktoks on Tumblr may be cringe, but I said I was bringing back Tumblr fake stories so to critics I say "I like your shoelaces" (also song is from my EP, "42, END ALL" in Jesus's slutty name amen)

[foxghost]

Today - the world outside my window is YELLOW and looks downright apocalyptic (wildfires. so many wildfires) - kidlet biked to school wearing a respirator mask the air is SOUP - I have reworked my outline for the first 1/3 of my story and deleted one of the POVs altogether - I am now the proud owner of a C1 Baizhu - considering starting a drag-king harmony group for protest reasons - seriously i used to teach harmony groups for a living this is totally doable - maybe run it over with the nonprofit activist group I volunteer with the next time we meet

[dragonwysper]

YES. Please question every scrap of information that is fed to you. Always and constantly. Info doesn't have to be blatant harmful bullshit for you to question its legitimacy. Dogwhistles and half-truths turn into that blatant bullshit, and by the time it gets there, you're already too deep.

[sconesfortea]

If I lived for a thousand years I'd still never understand what's happening in my country right now.

A 17 year-old British citizen attacked a children's dance lesson, murdering 3 children & injuring 8 more & 2 adults.

Vile shit-stirring racists on twitter completely invent a name & backstory for the attacker, claim he's Muslim & an illegal immigrant. This leads to a week of far-right riots, where mosques, libraries, & hotels have been attacked & arsoned & people have been looting from shops like Gregg & Shoezone?

Like children were murdered, their deaths totally hijacked by fascists who claim they love their country, but ultimately want to steal cheap pastries & shoes?

[qnewsau]

This Drag Queen Story Time set a Guinness World Record

New Post has been published on https://qnews.com.au/this-drag-queen-story-time-set-a-guinness-world-record/

This Drag Queen Story Time set a Guinness World Record

A drag queen story time event in Philadelphia has officially set the first Guinness World Record for the largest turnout at one of the family-friendly events.

At the weekend, a group of local drag performers in the US city came together for the event to mark the start of Pride Month.

The queens read children’s books to a crowd of 263 people. A representative from the Guinness World Records was there to do the count and hand the organisers the inaugural title.

Local outlet Philadelphia Gay News hosted the event on June 1 with support from Visit Philadelphia.

They shared photos and said the queens read from a collection of inclusive children’s books including Twas the Night Before Pride by Joanna McClintick, The Family Book by Todd Parr and Kevin the Unicorn: It’s Not All Rainbows by Jessika von Innerebner.

  View this post on Instagram

  A post shared by Visit Philly (@visitphilly)

Australia’s ChillOut festival holds huge Drag Storytime

But records are made to be broken.

The US city’s official Guiness World Record comes just a few months after a similar attempt in Australia.

In March at the ChillOut Festival in Daylesford, a group of performers attempted Australia’s biggest ever Drag Story Time.

Art Simone, Frock Hudson, Gabriella LaBucci, and Nate Byrne took the event out of the library and performed on ChillOut’s outdoor stage.

Organisers didn’t officially measure attendance. However the performers took turns reading inclusive children’s books to a huge crowd of families at Victoria Park.

ChillOut is Australia’s longest-running regional LGBTQIA+ festival. It’s on every year in Daylesford in country Victoria.

See the photos from ChillOut below:

  View this post on Instagram

  A post shared by ChillOut Festival (@chilloutfestival_daylesford)

For the latest LGBTIQA+ Sister Girl and Brother Boy news, entertainment, community stories in Australia, visit qnews.com.au. Check out our latest magazines or find us on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and YouTube.

[genfagloser]

ohh fuck

[teratomarty]

My brother is a librarian, and his library is one of the ones that hosts Drag Queen Story Time.

He is also 6'3", 300 lbs of Heavy Weapons Librarian.

This week, some karen showed up to take video of said storytime. She was unmoved by the director of the library telling her their policy against taking video in the children's room.

My brother was also unmoved. Specifically, he was unmoved from his position directly in the line of karen's cellphone. She got video of an acre of blue broadcloth shirt, and that's it.

Other people who showed up to scowl at the drag queen decided they had other things to do that day when my brother scowled at them. He inherited our Mama's scowl, and it's a good one.

Sometimes, an ally looks like a big fat bald white guy. Sometimes, an ally looks like a wall.

[incorrectbatfam]

What would Queering the Map look like in the DC Universe

For those of you that don't know, Queering the Map is basically this website where people can add pinpoints on a map with their different queer experiences. It's really cool, I suggest checking it out (unless you hate The Gays, in which case feel free to unfollow me).

Now, for the headcanons:

"Went to a baseball game for our third date. We ended up on the jumbotron. Some people booed us. I think it's 'cause I wore a Gotham jersey and she had a Metropolis hat. A modern-day Romeo and Juliet."

"Drag storytime here, every Thursday from 5:30 to 7"

"sometimes love is kidnapping a nepo baby with your two polyamorous boyfriends"

"Did it with another Arkham inmate, 5/10"

"According to my grandfather, who trained me to wield a sword from the moment I could walk, I'm 'too young' to know who I am."

"Themiscyra more like Lesbos 2 amirite"

"I have a crush on a boy in my class but every time I ask him to hang out he tells me he's busy. I know he doesn't do any after-school clubs and he doesn't need a part-time job because he's rich as hell. I have my conspiracy theories. Let's see how they pan out."

"@ Ollie Queen I screwed your son in your office"

"On this street corner, I got so nervous talking to the cute food truck worker that I puked in a trash can. I am 42 years old."

"Don't forget about us in Kahndaq!"

"Smallville boys sure love them cornfields"

"I put the bi in billionaire"

"me-wow ;)"

"It's Sunday morning. My wife and I slept in after a wild time last night. I woke up first so I surprised her with her favorite breakfast and used the food scraps to make compost cupcakes for her plants. Then she kissed me and showed me a funny video because she knows I love wild dogs, and it makes everything I've put up with worth it. Some folks will see this and still call us the villains. If that's the case, I don't wanna be a hero."

"I know where I'd put my Lantern ring ( ͡ ° ل͜ ͡°)"

"No GCPD at Pride"

"I no longer live in England but I had my fair share of adventures back in the day. We have always been here and we always will be."

"first kiss here, tasted like waffles"

"Hey Lex I can be your sugar baby i mean henchman"

"I can run from Keystone to Bludhaven in five seconds flat but it doesn't matter because he'll never see me the way I see him"

"I transed the fish. Signed, an Atlantean"

"Wanna match butts?"

[mousy-nona]

I didn't send the initial prompt so I hope this is allowed, but could I request a followup to the story where Lucifer gets addicted to Alastor's blood? One where he finally gets that taste he's been so desperately craving, whether through charm or persistence or a trade of some sort?

Part 1 here.

Lucifer tried everything. He tried meditation. He tried stuffing his face with so much cake his waistband grew three sizes (he later transfigured it away, so no one would ask him Concerned Questions). He even went on vacation to the Lust Ring for a while, but there were only so many sex jokes a person could take before they started seeing penises and boobs everywhere.

The whole time he was there, he kept thinking about the forbidden fruit coursing through Alastor’s veins. And when he was done lusting after Alastor’s blood, he would think about Alastor in general. Alastor would hate this, he thought, bored out of his mind while a cow devil was milked dry in front of him. Alastor would hate that, he thought, as Ozzie and his partner treated him to a very graphic display of affection that left his face redder than a tomato. When Ozzie started rolling out the really premium shows, Lucifer decided it was high time for him to go.

By that time, the obsession had grown to the point where he was nearly deafened by it, the constant refrain of AlastorthisAlastorthatAlastorAlastorAlastor –

Then he stepped out of his golden portal, and a tall figure sitting in an armchair by the fire turned around and the voice went silent.

Alastor barely looked up, too busy petting KeeKee and looking like the world’s best Bond villain to give him the time of day. 

“Ah, you’re back.”

When had that radio static started sounding like home? “Did y’all miss me?” He glanced around, deflating a little at the empty sitting room. “Where is everyone?”

“Busy with any number of far more important matters, I’m sure,” Alastor drawled. 

“It’s good to see you too, asshole,” Lucifer grumbled. The brief moment of homecoming faded, replaced by that permanent feeling of annoyance that he always felt around Alastor. He had started stomping upstairs when the shadows by the top of the stairs shifted, crinkled. Then Alastor was there, blocking his way. 

“I see your Majesty has his tiny knickers in a twist,” he commented, as if that wasn’t a totally inappropriate to say to the biblical source of all evil. 

Lucifer’s jaw nearly dropped to the floor. “Excuse me?” 

“I wouldn’t bother trying to deny it if I were you,” Alastor mentioned. “That would be quite an insult to my intelligence. You’ve been in a foul mood for weeks. The whole hotel has noticed it. You’ve been dragging that silly cane all over the place, something you only do when you're upset.” A flash of green lit up Alastor’s wide smile. He looked positively ghoulish, but Lucifer was still stuck on his comment about his cane. I drag it when I’m sad? Since when? And why did he notice? “If it’s bothering you so much, why not share the load?”

“You want me to…tell you my problems? What is this, storytime?” Lucifer scoffed. 

“Perhaps I could lend you my assistance,” he purred. “For a price, of course.” 

Lucifer rolled his eyes. “Now you’re insulting my intelligence.” With a flick of his hand, another portal appeared on the stairs, blocking Alastor from view. The demon was oddly perceptive. He didn’t want him to see just how close he was to falling to his knees and blubbering yes please just a sip, just one more taste. 

(Lillith had always called him a drama queen. Maybe she’d had a point.)

The portal didn’t block the sound of Alastor’s voice, more’s the pity. “Is this about the little scratch you gave me a few weeks ago?” 

Lucifer stilled. The portal wavered, guttered, and went out, leaving the two of them staring at each other.

“How–?” He stammered. 

Alastor’s grin was triumphant. “How many times must I say it? Never underestimate my intelligence. So am I correct?”

Lucifer didn’t respond, which was answer enough. Alastor sniffed. 

“In that case, I believe I have an answer to your problems.” 

What? Was he offering what Lucifer thought he was offering? “And what could that possibly be?”

“Quid pro quo, my dear. You get some of my blood, and I get some of yours.” 

“Fine,” Lucifer gestured him over impatiently. “Come here and bite me –” 

“Not like that.” 

Alastor raised a small glass vial. His smile would have made a crocodile jealous. “I told you, just a little bit of blood. I never said to drink.” 

Alastor eyes flashed into dials and the darkness was split by a lazer of green, then red – a literal red flag. The biggest STOP HERE, DO NOT PASS GO, DO NOT COLLECT $200 Lucifer had ever seen. 

But his mouth was so dry. He could barely think past how large his tongue had grown. Besides, he was the king of hell. The original sin. What harm could it do to let Alastor have a little bit of his blood? 

A lot, the rational part of his brain whispered. This is Alastor we’re talking about. But the rational part of his brain had grown rather quiet around the Crusades, and he’d lost a good chunk of it by World War II. 

Charlie said he was reckless. She didn’t know the half of it. 

“Fine,” Lucifer said. “But you only get to take my blood once. And I can drink from you when I want.”

Alastor thought for a moment, then his lips moved. 

Deal.

The word disappeared in the cra-a-ack of green lightning that struck around them like fireworks. He started to roll up his sleeves, but Lucifer was too quick for him. He flew up the steps and smashed into Alastor with such force he sent them spiraling into the wall. Alastor gasped, but before he could protest, Lucifer had torn the fabric of his shirt and slashed a deep groove into the cool skin of his neck. 

Finally, that sweet blood flowed onto his tongue. He moaned, his lids fluttering as he drank greedily. Big mouthfuls at a time. 

Sin. Death. Apples. Smoke and sugar. The taste was indescribable, and in that moment, Lucifer thought he could have promised Alastor his whole kingdom, and it would have been a fair trade. 

Alastor, for his part, stayed dutifully still, even when Lucifer licked off the blood that had splattered onto Alastor’s collarbone and the tip of his chin, unwilling to let even a drop of it go to waste.

It took a while, but Lucifer finally leaned back with a groan, his lips smeared with blood like it was cherry chapstick. 

“Satisfied?” Alastor muttered. Lucifer made an incoherent sound of joy. 

“Good. I am as well.” Alastor raised a completely full vial of golden blood. When had he taken it? “I believe it was a satisfactory deal for both parties.”

Then he smiled in a way that made Lucifer's skin prickle. 

Heavenly Father, what have I done? 

[etakeh]

He got dragged a day or two ago for calling someone a pedophile because they had "map" in their public bio.

Why? Because they literally make maps.

@etakeh Andy having a day it seems