#dont bother reading this honestly

[rafeandonlyrafe]

three: lila

words: 1k

warnings: 18+ only, smut, threesome, rafe fucking other girl, virgin!reader, loss of virginity, saving for marriage, religious!reader, unprotected sex, marriage

rafe looks between you and your friend, and you instantly understand what he's asking for.

it's not hard to ask lila to leave the party, to come up to rafes bedroom. she's heard whispers among various friend groups that rafe likes his girls friends and that you have no problem with it either.

“are you sure?” lila asks, blinking up at you as you situate yourself to sit next to her head, her body already stripped naked.

“yeah.” you nod, eyes flickering between her concerned face and rafe undressing, his muscles on show as he lifts his shirt over his head.

“i just always thought you'd participate too…” lilas voice is a whisper, but you both know rafe can hear everything. the room is eerily silent despite the party going on downstairs, the soundproofing blocking anything from coming in or out.

“it's okay.” you swallow thickly. “ill just watch.”

it is okay, or at least, you've grown to be okay with it. you almost never get the spike of jealousy you used to get. you love rafe, and you know this is what you have to do to keep him for now.

“she's saving herself for when i put a ring on her finger.” rafe pipes up.

“oh.” it all makes sense to lila now. why playboy rafe cameron would date you, a devout christian, and why you'd be okay with him fucking other girls. it's because you can't fuck him yourself, not yet, but need to keep him satisfied.

you watch as rafe shoves his shorts and underwear down in one quick motion. it's not about love or passion when he's with these girls.

you can tell from the way he doesn't kiss them, doesn't hold them, merely uses them then leaves them laid slack on the bed.

rafe pushes lilas legs up so she's spread wide. he leans forward and whispers in your ear, the same confirmation he always does. “you're okay with this?”

you nod, and then he thrusts forward.

lilas cry of pain and pleasure has you frowning, hand coming to pet over her hair while rafe fucks into her roughly, not holding back.

you always make sure to bring back friends you won't get jealous of after making the mistake of bringing one of rafes ex's from high school up to his room only to feel the sick feeling of deep seated jealousy rise inside of you, and for you to stop rafe before he finished.

“god, he's-” lila blinks up at you as a tear slips down her cheek, which you quickly wipe away. “he's so big.”

you can't help the smile that comes to your face. you know exactly what you're in for on your wedding night, having watched the way rafe squeezes inside of every girl he's been with.

“y/n.” rafe moans out, needing your eyes on him. you keep petting lilas head but scooch closer to rafe.

“kiss me please.” rafe says, his voice laced with pleasure. you lean forward and press your lips against his, feeling an arm come around your torso and pull you all the way into him.

you wrap your arms around his shoulders, and part of you feels like he's inside you at that moment, and lila isn't there at all. you moan into rafes mouth, feeling his body move with every thrust, like he's pushing his way inside of your heart and making space for himself, but he already owns every inch of you.

“im buying a ring tomorrow.” rafe grunts against your lips.

you can't help but giggle, knowing tomorrow you'll both sober up and calm down and realize you're too young for marriage and you need to at least give it another year for you to finish your online degree, but that doesn't hold rafes tongue in the heat of the moment.

“i love you.” you coo to rafe.

“fuck.” rafe thrusts harder, you can tell by lilas moans. you pull away from him and move back to kneeling next to her, your hand coming back to pet her hair.

“you gonna cum lila?” you ask, blinking down at her. “it's okay, you can.”

“yeah-” she nods rapidly. “real close.”

you look up at rafe, who frowns slightly before rolling his eyes, hating that his lustful needs brings pleasure to other girls when you're the only one he truly wants to make cum, but he's not cruel, so he drops a thumb to lilas clit and rubs, keeping his eyes on you.

lilas entire body shakes as she cums, and rafe releases moments later into her, but to moans of your name.

“shh, take your time.” you tell lila, dropping a kiss to your friends forehead as she breaths heavily. “you can use the bathroom or whatever you need. you can spend the night here if you have to as well.”

rafe picks you up and doesn't even bother to say another word to lila, she's served her purpose to him.

“bye, lila!” you call out as rafe steps out into the hallway, still completely naked to transport you to the room next door and cuddle up with you like he really wants to. “thanks again!” you call before shutting the door, her body still slackened on the bed, cum dripping out onto the sheets.

“my girl.” rafe presses a kiss to your jaw as he takes you inside the bedroom, shutting and locking the door, no desire to go back to the party.

“you know…” you mumble. “i think i actually do want you to get that ring tomorrow.”

rafe perks up slightly as he sets you down on the bed. “oh yeah?”

“i mean, we'll need to be engaged for a bit so it makes sense, doesn't it?”

“ive already got one in mind.” rafe presses a kiss to your lips.

-- one year later --

“ive-” rafe swallows thickly. “ive literally dreamt about this.”

his cock is lined up with your entrance, your pretty white lace lingerie laying scattered across the floor of the honeymoon suite.

“please.” you whimper, not able to wait a moment longer.

rafe pushes in, and your head tips back as you moan, finally experiencing what you've just seen all those girls feel before. ecstasy. 

[tiktowafel]

do you ever think about how all you used to draw when you were 10 was ponies and that you should still know how to do that, then get an idea and proceed to draw something like these in nearly one sitting and it turns out better than any drawing you've done in the entire past month

sooo anyway does anyone have cutie mark or pony name ideas for them?? lol

[mishy-mashy]

I said this in a whole reblog, but just copy-pasting to a separate post because I think it'll give some reading comprehension and reblogs don't show up in the search feature.. again, I'm reiterating what I said in another post.

Go check out @demidokuriya 's post for this; OP's post made me put this all down in like. 20 minutes. Mind went vroom vroom cuz HEY THEY'RE ONTO SOMETHING.

(They also reblogged the post with some hint to some behind the scenes of what led to the ideas if you wanna check that out)

Look below at how, when Mineta told AFO to spare Tokoyami, AFO specifically went "..."

He remembers Jirou and thinks, The braying howls of the weak...

He was going to take Tokoyami's Quirk. He took Hawks'. But after Mineta pleaded with him, AFO just straight-up left and didn't take anyone else's Quirk.

AFO saw Yoichi in Mineta.

These scenes are near-identical to each other.

Mineta and Yoichi (at that time) are both much smaller than the normal person at their age

They're both hurt, yet dragged themselves up from the ground to throw something at AFO, to get his attention and make their voice

Both are considered weak, even if they have a Quirk (Mineta's Pop-Off and Yoichi's undeveloped Factor)

The fact that Yoichi got AFO's attention here by throwing a can at him, while Mineta got his attention by throwing a Pop-Off ball; and it stuck.

Mineta's call for his attention landed and actually stuck to AFO. This is unlike when Yoichi and his can bounced off, and AFO kicked him, not listening to him; AFO listened to Mineta and left Tokoyami alone, technically doing what Mineta wanted—to not hurt this person.

AFO just went on to hurt more people away from Mineta's [Yoichi's] eyes so the small weakling wouldn't see.

Yoichi and Mineta both cried to AFO to not hurt in his ways, when AFO was intent on stealing people's Quirks

AFO even stole Hawks' Quirk during this time.

He had time to steal Hawks' Quirk, and though he could've tossed him to the side, he let Hawks stand in his way.

He had the energy. Right after this event, he flew off and left the scene. But he didn't go for Tokoyami immediately.

And this let Mineta play his part, and remind AFO of Yoichi.

"A putrid, festering Quirk Factor."

That sounds like Yoichi, AFO.

".. such garbage."

Hey hey hey, what did Yoichi throw at him when they were kids?

A discarded can. Garbage.

This chapter (385) where AFO listens to Mineta is literally called [A Youthful Urge].

Mineta told AFO to take his Pop-Off (hurt him) instead. But last time, AFO hurt Yoichi by kicking him; this time, AFO not only listened to Mineta to not hurt Tokoyami, but didn't touch Mineta at all.

Even though this time, Mineta [Yoichi] offered to take that place of suffering.

Yoichi didn't do that back then. AFO just turned on little Yoichi anyway.

Yoichi through his whole existence is literally [the braying howls of the weak]. AFO acknowledges he's weak and idealistic, yet he still loves him.

Side note about this panel, I think it's interesting that in this vision, this was the first time we saw Yoichi's eyes: when he was being defiant, despite being pushed down by someone much stronger than him.

Really characteristic of him, honestly. Yoichi's soft-spoken and frail, but it's always reiterated that Yoichi had a powerful will against his stronger big brother.

Mineta at this moment reminded him too much of Yoichi, because the two scenes are near-identical to each other. Parallels, really.

Reiterating something from OP's post that I reblogged this from;

"The reminder of his brother made him uncomfortable, so he hurried away."

AFO didn't want to hurt Yoichi again.

[psybrepunk]

Sometimes I like to remember back in 2020 when I fell HARD for Nick Valentine and was reading every NSFW fic I could find and anyways there was this one smut one-shot where Sole undoes Nick's trousers and he's got an LED LIGHTED CYBERDICK and I've just never really gotten over the shock and mental image of that

[oceanwithouthermoon]

i think its weird that i have to make this disclaimer but the internet is crazy so wtvr,, anyway,,

if i say i dont like something, that doesnt mean "that thing is bad and nobody should post it.."

i swear literally every time i even mention that i dislike something, people will go "wow does that mean u fucking hate me cuz i post that thing? ur a fucking stupid bitch and all ur opinions r wrong" LIKE ?? er.. no. just because i say i dont like certain characterizations of certain characters (the saiki k fandom is CRAZY about this cuz i can state an opinion on literally any character and a group of people will still go 'well only we're allowed to post our opinions about them because we're always right!1!1!'), or certain ship tropes (mentioned my hatred of toxic yaoi maybe once or twice on here months ago and people STILL get mad at me as if i said toxic yaoi lovers r evil or something), or certain ships, or WHATEVER, does not mean that i HATE the people who are posting them or that i think they shouldnt post them at all, NO, im just posting about my personal tastes on my personal blog and it would be extremely weird and hypocritical if i decided that i was the ONLY person that was allowed to do that,,

i think the only reason people assume that is because there are a lot of other people on here who ARE like that, and a lot of people toe the line between posting that they dont like something and posting that they think everyone who likes that thing is stupid, annoying, and wrong,, so i guess all i can say is, sorry for whatever made you make these assumptions but they arent true about me so plz leave me alone ʘ‿ʘ ur doing the same thing to me that ur accusing me of but i didnt do it in the first place so ur just actively being a dick for no reason

[soaps-mohawk]

sorry about the anons Rory🫂

if this gets answered and is on your blog, guys maybe you should scroll down for this woman to rest okay😭 it really does get annoying when you have to continuously repeat things

there should be a few masterlists below, or you can search it directly on her blog

also, maybe tone down on asking for spoilers, idk if you're still okay with recieving those Rory, but y'all we'll get to that point of the question being answered eventually

anyway, hope you're doing okay. please rest, maybe turn off notifs for Tumblr for a while if you need to?

Thank you, love.

Yeah, it is kind of annoying when it's constant questions that have already been answered on the lore masterlist or things that get talked about over and over on the blog. I know the lore masrerlists are long and there's a lot to go through, but I spent a long time last night reorganizing them to make them a bit easier to look through.

I don't mind people asking for spoilers for things that are going to happen, or theorizing about things because I get to use the gif. It's when people ask about things that have been touched on already in the fic. If you're a new reader, it's either already been talked about, or it's going to be.

I know everyone is anxious to get to the angst and the plot with the cameras, but we'll get there. We will. I didn't put it in the story for no reason. Things will start coming together as we get closer (which we are pretty close now) as to why it's taken so long. Trust me, I'd love to get there faster, but there's other things we have to focus on too that will be important later. I don't write things for no reason. Everything is for a reason and things will play out, I promise. I can tell the people who actually read and pay attention to details versus those that just read the words because I've been hinting at things since the beginning. A lot of things have been hinted at or mentioned or foreshadowed that have happened, or will.

I know a lot of people only come to my blog for the fic. Which, that's fine. But like...take the time to look around. I have a navigation post for a reason. It'll answer most of your questions and if it doesn't, then ask. I'm begging people to look first 😭 please for my sake and yours.

I did take a rest today. Ignored tumblr for a while and did some things I wanted to do.

[milkbreadtoast]

OK DOES ANYONE KNOW that het romance korean webtoon called "super secret" by eon abt a girl and her werewolf childhood friend... it was 1 of my v first webtoons and i have this super random out of pocket take for it that ive been keeping to myself for yrs im finally breaking my silence LMFOAOAO

anyway theyre cute together i said what i said (no one cares)

(i do rmbr posting abt this before when i first read the epilogue but no one cared/no one still cares BWAHAHHA)

[micahdotgov]

i really dont get the long running joke of reading a fanfic and being jump scared by an american character saying arse, i can count on one hand the amount of fics i've read that have american characters using british slang/words, meanwhile it's far far more common to read fics about british characters using almost exclusively american things than not. jamie tartt is not saying trash can. james bond is not saying sidewalk. eames inception is not saying pants when he means trousers. in fact british characters SHOULD be saying arse but you lot are constantly making them say ass. stop this.

[the-judicial-assistants-notebook]

*KICKS THE DOOR DOWN* WWWAIT FREYA I HAVE MIXED FEELINGS ON FANDOMS VIEW OF THIS SHIP I NEED TO KNOW UR OPINION. HOMUMIKU???

WKSHJSHJDBJHAHAHAH HIIIII, GRACE!!!! ❤️💕💞💝💗💖💘💓💕💞💖💞💘

Homumiko (HUGE spoilers for DGS after the bingo sheet):

I have been waiting to get into this ship properly, because I have THOUGHTS and I need to be forced to get them out coherently.

Let's get into the basic ship itself. Honestly? No comment. I think hmmk cheats a bit by relying on the literal decades people have spent shipping Holmes and Watson together, and I doubt that they would be half as popular without this history; but, as someone who has never had strong feelings about HolmesWatson either way, I don't have that bias! Even if we're just going off of DGS and looking at how they complement and trust each other, and are obviously more comfortable around one another than most other people, I don't really have a strong opinion on them. I do think they're close, but whether that bond is platonic, romantic, sexual or some mix of the two is just not something I particularly care about. You know who I do care about, though?

Susato-san.

OKAY, SIT DOWN, EVERYONE BECAUSE THE SHIP BINGO PART OF THIS IS OVER, AND NOW WE'RE GOING TO TALK ABOUT THE PARTS OF HMMK I DO CARE ABOUT AND WHY THAT ACTUALLY HAS VERY LITTLE TO DO WITH THEM AND EVERYTHING TO DO WITH HER.

Let's get this out of the way first. Based on my very modern sensibilities, I take a rather harsh stance on Mikotoba's parenting.

Do I think he loves his daughter? Sure. But which parts of his daughter? Because it's very easy to love a child who is always obedient, elegant and the literal embodiment of idealised Japanese womanhood without knowing or truly even looking at her. I think Susato made it easy for him to love her, because she believed she had to earn it. Her father left when she was born, consumed by grief over her mother's death -- her mother, whom she killed. I know the game tries to justify this by saying it was Jigoku who dragged him away (and I do think him leaving was good for him, because I doubt he would have been a good father even if he'd stayed due to his grief), but the point is that he still left. For six years. And when he returned, he didn't even return because of her (whether she knew that from the moment she met him or not is debatable, but I think, at least on a subconscious level, she knew. And, of course, it's also debatable whether he could have returned sooner because of his commitment as a transfer student, but the Mikotobas are a powerful family, and, if Soseki could return before his period of learning was fully up, I think he would have been able to pull strings to return home if he wanted to).

This falls under speculation, so I understand not agreeing with it, but I don't think Mikotoba ever properly spoke to Susato when she was a child, especially not about what he did in England. I believe that a part of the reason why Susato started reading the Sherlock Holmes stories to begin with was because they featured a doctor in London, like her father had been, and she wanted to feel closer to him through those stories. And it probably worked! Her father probably did start engaging with her more after after she picked them up, because it was an easy way to connect with her. That's why I believe she was so insistent on the existence of John H. Watson, as a doctor, when she met Iris and learnt the truth.

There's this distance between Susato and her father which glimpse in moments in the game, like how he remarks on her lack of composure in court (suggesting that he isn't used to seeing her yamato nadeshiko mask slip), how he less requests her trust and more orders or expects it forthright, and how he seems reluctant to face the parts of her that inconvenience him (like how he asks her to play the koto when he isn't home and how, when faced by her real anger, he looks to Holmes to explain the situation rather than actually attempt to himself).

HOWEVER, in the setting of the game (Meiji-era Japan), I will concede that Mikotoba is a fantastic father. He may not have been very present in her life growing up, but men largely weren't expected to be. Their jobs were to provide for their children, not nurture them. And Mikotoba went well beyond his duty in that regard. Add to that the fact that he had her properly educated, ensured she knew how to defend herself, and allowed her to pursue her studies overseas at a level that was on par with any man, and you can see that he's really quite a great father; which is why I don't think he sees his absence as a flaw or even notices he was absent. Susato, though, does.

Now, Susato is obviously a product of her time, too, so I believe she'd be insulted if anyone was to suggest that her father or childhood was lacking in some way. That being said, I do believe she is aware of the distance between them in a way he is not. I think her affection for him is founded on a sense of duty and filial piety rather than pure love (although, obviously, she does love him), and, as she grew older, she stopped vying for his affection; hence why she's obsessed with the Great Detective more so than anyone else when we meet her. I also think that this distance contributed to her becoming so attached to Kazuma, in spite of the fact that he kept her at arm's length, too; he may not have allowed her very close, but he was always there, and he saw her for who she truly was. When she leaves at the end of the first game, Susato is not so much anxious that her father is ill as she is shaken -- she seems more upset that she's leaving her Baker Street family rather than that her actual father might be dying, and I think that's because she knows how to live without him. This distance between them, I believe, becomes all the more apparent to her when she goes to London and sees the deep bond held between Iris and Holmes.

And, speaking of, you know who else I think is aware of the distance between them and the part he played in creating that distance? The Great Detective himself, Mr. Sherlock Holmes.

See, I think Holmes has always known about Susato. I'm quite sure that, from the moment they met, he knew that Mikotoba was running away from something and that he had left an infant daughter back home. He just didn't care.

We don't know what Holmes was like when he was younger, but I believe he was a lot closer to how he appears in a lot of modern adaptations and how Watson describes him in some of the Sherlock Holmes stories: the 'cold, calculating computer' character. I don't think it's a stretch to think that Holmes viewed marriage and children as mere distractions and interferences to the mind; and Mikotoba was, presumably, his first real friend. He wasn't going to let something pesky like a baby back home detract from his friend's obviously sterling character and brain! After all, it's a lot easier to ignore this nebulous, abstract entity when you simply consider its existence, and thus its abandonment, unimportant. It's a lot easier when you don't know what it's like to be a father yourself. It's a lot easier when you don't know her.

Here's the thing: I believe Holmes's image of and relation to Mikotoba began changing from the time he started raising Iris. Suddenly, that inconsequential baby seemed to bear quite a bit of consequence, actually. But it was still all right to keep dismissing her, because maybe Mikotoba's baby wasn't special the way Iris was. Maybe she was a brat or an idiot, and really not worth much time at all! Maybe she could've lived without him and been perfectly fine, regardless...? As time went on, I believe the excuses he made for Mikotoba's decision all those years ago became increasingly flimsy, but he was still able to hold onto them because The Daughter was still an indistinct figure in his mind. She wasn't quite real.

That is, until he met her.

In the game, Holmes tends to keep a certain width between himself and Susato. He very rarely initiates conversation with her the way he does Ryuunosuke, and from a Doylist (ha) perspective, this is obviously because Ryuunosuke is... the main character. Looking at it from a narrative perspective, though, I think he was afraid of hurting more than he already has and must.

Holmes is a very resolute man. He sticks by his decisions regardless of what anyone else thinks, so I don't think he ever regretted what he did. However, I do think he felt guilty. Certainly, he didn't quite take her father away from her, but he did play a role in keeping him from her for so long. I think there was a part of him that consciously guided Mikotoba away from thinking about Japan while they lived together, because, well... he didn't want him to leave.

There's an interesting layer to the separation that Holmes creates with Susato, because, beyond the distance he maintains between her and himself, he also keeps her identity separate from her father's. Contrary to how he refers to Ryuunosuke by his last name, Holmes only ever calls Susato "Miss Susato" or "my dear (madame)", and never "Miss Mikotoba". I view this is his way of, perhaps subconsciously, dividing from that little girl he once decided did not matter. And it's interesting because, to an extent, he tries to do with her and Kazuma, too.

In the SS Burya case, despite meeting Susato first and seeing how affected she is by Kazuma's "death", Holmes largely ignores her in favour of focusing on Ryuunosuke and his bond with Kazuma. He calls Kazuma Ryuunosuke's "dear companion" and pretty much only interacts with Susato when he has little other choice... until he sees her cry.

See, I believe that when Holmes found out Susato was going to England and was about to be wrapped up in the whole messy affair, he was fully committed to Not Giving a Damn about Her. Sure, he would let her and Kazuma live with him, but by no means was he going to allow himself to grow attached to her because, again, he values his relationship and history with Mikotoba too much for it to get complicated in this way. Susato's relative composure throughout the case helps him hold on to this resolution; however, when he catches that final conversation between her and Ryuunosuke in the cabin, he is finally forced to see and acknowledge the amount of pain she is truly in. It forces him to at last face the fact that he can't avoid or fake aloofness around her any longer, because she is not some nebulous, distant entity he can continue to ignore. She is an actual girl with a fiercely strong spirit, a brilliant mind and real, human emotions. A girl whom he's hurt twice-over now and must continue hurting until all his lies finally come to light.

When he makes that decision to enter the cabin and console her the only way he knows how, he throws away any hope he had of feeling anything but apathy towards her. In truth, he probably didn't have much hope of that to begin with, because at his core, Sherlock Holmes is a good man, and he cares.

He cares for her, too, even though he may have no right to. How could he not, when she loves him so openly, trusts him so readily, saves his life? How could he not, when she comes to him in the middle of the night with a secret she can't tell anyone else because his judgement is the only one she wholly trusts and believes in? How could he not, when she refuses to accept he lied despite the living, breathing evidence he did until he admits it himself? How could he not, when after everything he has done, she still looks at him the way she always has and says that she's proud that her father is the assistant of "the Great Detective"?

How could anyone not? How could Mikotoba not... love her the second he laid eyes on her?

And of course this doesn't shatter his love for Mikotoba -- he has no right to these feelings in the first place: no matter how indignant or guilty he may feel, it doesn't change the fact that he has been lying to and manipulating her the entire time they've known one another. He can't even bring himself to tell her that he's been lying; he has to go through Ryuunosuke instead, because, even after all this time, he still can't face the woman whom he's done nothing but cause pain for from the moment she was born. When he can't even give her that ounce of respect, who is he to judge Mikotoba?

So he doesn't. Till the end of the game, he keeps Susato at a distance and pretends that everything between him and Mikotoba is as it was from the start. But, inside, I think he knows it isn't. Because I think Holmes can see that Mikotoba doesn't feel half as guilty about what they've done as he does, and that he doesn't view the fact that he left Susato 16 years ago as a real problem. And while he doesn't judge Mikotoba for that, I don't think he can look past it anymore. That final investigation and dance of deduction, to me, is less an assurance that they are still the same partners they were before, and more a final farewell to their old, uncomplicated bond -- the one that did exist before they grew to love other people and understand what love truly meant to both of them.

Going back to the ship itself, I think shipping them pre-DGS works perfectly well. They both had a huge impact on each other's life and changed one another for the better; Holmes by drawing Mikotoba out from his grief, and Mikotoba by pulling Holmes from his life of solitude and loneliness. They needed each other, but it is also because of these reasons that I think there was an issue of codependency between them, hence the semi-horrible for each other box I gave them. With Mikotoba, it's clear cut. Holmes helped him run away from his very real issues at home and allowed him to live like he was a bachelor with zero familial obligations again. With Holmes, it gets a bit more foggy, but I believe that Mikotoba basically allowed him to live believing he was the only person Holmes would ever truly connect with and properly befriend. Holmes is obviously his own person and whatnot, but I do think there was a bit of unhealthy attachment there on his end if not both.

During DGS and post-DGS is where their ship gets more complicated for me, because, while Susato is still very much there at the beginning of their relationship, her role in their lives and what they did to her becomes impossible to ignore once she and Holmes actually meet. I don't believe that they can just pick up from where they left off because there is now (imo) a fundamental disagreement in how they view their actions and how it affected her. So, even if they do go back to being lovers or whatever afterwards, I feel that there should be this chasm or weight between them that they simply don't talk about or acknowledge in any way. Because I don't think they'd discuss it. Holmes because it isn't his place, Mikotoba because he sees it as a non-issue (maybe he doesnt even notice this distance), and both because sweeping unpleasantness under the rug is so ingrained into their cultures.

My main issue with the way this ship is often portrayed post-DGS (why they got a 50-50 on the I would erase them from existence box) is that it ignores what happened with Susato. The few times I've seen the concern that she might have an issue with their relationship even brought up in hmmk works is always because they're gay. Which, like!! Fair!!! It's the 1800s, I get it, but!!!! You're ignoring the actual, very big issue for why she might be hurt and that's because DGS ends with her finding out that three of the men she's closest to have been lying and using her for their own means her entire life!!!!!!!! And she just has to take it!!!!!!!

Which brings me to the second most popular interpretation of this ship which doesn't just put Iris and Susato in a box somewhere unseen, and that's the one where all four of them are a peaceful happy family with 0 issues! And this one bothers me because it seems like it's taking what Susato said at the end of the reveal as what she 100% sincerely meant down to her core, rather than something she had to say because (1) it is her duty to honour her father no matter what, and (2) because Iris was there. When she learns the entire truth, I don't think Susato knows what she truly thinks or feels about any of it; but she sees Iris, and she sees this little girl who was abandoned through her circumstances as a baby, named after her mother, and forced to grow up much sooner than she should have been, and she sees a girl who is more her sister than anyone else. So she does what she always has and tucks away her own emotions so she might tend to someone else's. She has been the perfect daughter her whole life; she can be the perfect sister.

Even if you don't subscribe to the, admittedly, harsh view of Mikotoba's parenting that I do, I don't see how you can get away from the fact that they still lied to her for a significant portion of time. Especially from Holmes, whom she trusted and believed in more than anyone else! In the face of his shoddy deductions, she still held onto her unwavering belief that he was a genius and a good man, and then it comes out that he's just been lying to her from the first day he met her. I just can't extract the ship from their treatment of Susato, so when I say that I would erase the ship from existence, it's mainly about these two bits. As with Asoryuu, the primary reason why I don't ship them personally is because I can't do that to her.

And, obviously, it's just shipping and fun and games, and everyone should feel free to ship whoever in whatever way they want bUT IN A SPECIAL WORLD MADE PERFECTLY FOR ME. iris would be perfectly oblivious, and susato would have tossed both holmes and mikotoba into the thames and left them to figure it out. In a world that must still vaguely make sense with the canon of the game, though, then Holmes would have given Mikotoba the boot and taken the kids; because he may be a coward, but at least I can see that he knows he fucked up, and he allows Susato to set the terms of their relationship, just like he does Iris.

Anyway, I'm so sorry for how long, convoluted and only tangentially-related to the ask this is, but thank you so much for it, Grace!!!! I don't think I quite got down what I meant precisely, but it's the closest to coherency I've ever gotten so. Thank you 💖💕💗💓💕💘💕

[kalirya]

my parents but especially my mom are supernaturally adept at killing a vibe because they just can't help but spew out bigoted shit with the most vitriolic tone of voice imaginable without even thinking about it

like half jokingly chastising my dad for leaving the seat up when he's been the only one to use it that way my entire life, and when my mom joins in because he says "maybe it wasn't me!" the very first words out of her mouth are "not unless one of us became a tranny overnight!"

like was that necessary. slurs fall so easily from their lips and they do it on fucking purpose, because they think they should be able to and the fact they shouldn't is the only motivation they need. no to mention the sheer disgust the words drip with, every fucking time.

any wonder I wont even tell them I'm queer, even the few times they've asked (well, they tend to ask if I'm a lesbian because their understanding about most things but especially identities is as shallow as the mirage of an oasis in the desert), never mind any gender things. I'll stay in the closet to them until I die or they do unless it becomes unavoidable, because I genuinely just don't have the capacity to deal with them not just not understanding but belligerently refusing to understand. cruelly, at times.

my parents will never know me as an adult, as a person, and no part of them would mourn it if they knew. and that's a little sad. that i can't even let myself believe they'd be willing to try, because I know they wouldn't, just makes me fucking sad, so why bother telling or asking.

it feels a little like this in all my relationships. even my sister had an overreaction to me introducing myself to her friends with a nickname of my birth name, and it's just always like that. I don't ask because the times I have prove that there's no point, my asks, my desires, the things I want or refuse to admit I need come second the moment it inconveniences someone else or requires change from them. it has never been different.

so why fucking bother.

anyway sorry mom, one of us did become a tranny overnight. my bad.

[peachy-artist]

I DONT READ A LOT OF FANFIC, SO IF ANYONE WRITES ANY GOOD PAVRIN ONES YOURE OBLIGATED TO TAG ME (please)

[tbgkaru-woh]

I may seem very picky but honestly, despite having themes or dynamics i like or dislike, I'm able to love everything AS LONG as it has fixed dynamics of my preference.

No "switching as default", no "i used to too but now i will bottom for whatever reason", no "I'm bottoming now but I'm topping next time", no rapid character change just because there's stereotypes around what bottoms or tops act like. No. Just character preferring to be the bottom and default being seen and wanted as a bottom. That's it, that's all I want to be happy and all over someone's idea.

BUT IT'S SO RARE

[illogicalghost]

.

[sp1resong]

m. never really realized just how aro i am before

[mxwhore]

reading the asks i got last night regarding The Situation while having a very delicious breky and just wanted to thank you all for sharing your thoughts and experiences being genderqueer and making my sunday morning a bit kinder :) ♡

[anotheruntitledsong]

i did like the hidden palace but (SPOILER if anyone hasn't read it?) i'm genuinely so annoyed at how Arbeely is handled like... I wish i could be sad but i'm just fucking irritated. I was overly invested in him and that's def why but i just feel like they did him dirty