Nerissa, 26, she/her. Aro-ace, British (Northern-Irish), writer. Obsessed with Tolkien, Dickens, musicals, period drama, Cdrama, and many other things. Ask and tag game friendly.
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
Text
Shadow and Bone | S01 E02
"I've worked for you long enough to know when you're still figuring things out, and you don't know how to pull off this job!"
#shadow and bone#shadowandboneedit#six of crows#sixofcrowsedit#sabedit#socedit#grishaverse#fantasy#fantasyedit#netflixedit#seriesedit#my GIFs
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Government departments and their mind-boggling incompetence my BELOATHED
#nerissa complains#I only wanted a simple answer to a simple question#and I was put through to five different departments#not a single one could answer my question but they all answered completely different questions they were absolutely convinced I'd asked#and they kept telling me to check their website#which tells me to phone them if I have any questions#*screams in rage*
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
More Rohirrim Idioms and Adages
People seemed to like some of my Rohan idioms and adages from a few days ago, and I found some more among old posts and drafts. Just throwing them here now for general interest, to the extent that there is any!
“To keep the bees busy” means to drink heavily/get drunk because the Rohirrim’s drink of choice is mead, which is made from honey.
“There’s a worm at [person’s] elbow” means that they’re getting bad advice, coming obviously from the experience of Gríma sitting by Théoden’s throne. (Fourth Age only)
“To get the tusks” means to do something that backfires. It refers to the old king Folca, who wanted the glory of slaying the great boar of Everholt. He did but was also killed in the process, and so instead of any of his glorious deeds, he’s mostly remembered as the king who got gored to death by a wild pig.
“To show the mercy of Helm” means to be absolutely merciless. Re-read the Helm Hammerhand section of Appendix A — that guy was wild!
“[Person] is putting up the rowan preserves” is a euphemism for being on your period. Rowan trees have berries that can be used to make jams, sauces and preserves. They’re bright red, self explanatory. (Typically only said between women. It is not a good idea for a Rohirrim man to ever make this suggestion about someone else.)
“To get water in your hayloft” means to have disastrously bad luck. The hay you store in your stable’s loft must be kept absolutely dry because any moisture up there will cause decomposition and rot the hay, potentially ruining a whole stockpile.
“A sharp mind needs no book.” Folks in Rohan do not enjoy being told that they should adopt the practice of using written records to preserve and pass on their histories, etc. Anyone who suggests as much hears this old adage, which is a more polite way of saying “only a dummy has to rely on a book to remember important things.”
“No man defeats the Wold; at best, he can hope to survive it.” The Wold is some of Rohan’s roughest, most unforgiving terrain. This adage started in recognition of how hardy its relatively few residents had to be to hack it out there, though the éoreds of the northeast also came to appropriate it as their battle motto given how often the Wold was (unsuccessfully) raided by outsiders.
“There’s more than one way for a dragon to bite.” References their Northman ancestor Fram, who slew a dragon and then refused to share the dragon’s hoard with the dwarves who claimed it was theirs. He sent them only the dragon’s teeth, an insult that led the dwarves to find and kill Fram. It’s used as a general caution against overconfidence or unnecessarily antagonistic behavior.
122 notes
·
View notes
Text
"came back wrong" you could not come back wrong even if you tried. you've changed, beyond recognition, but while my eyes may not know you, my heart still does. i love you.
16K notes
·
View notes
Text
I spent way too long on this
448 notes
·
View notes
Text
lol i went to delete a twitter account for reasons (i ran a satire account of my university’s president) and it wouldn’t let me.
53K notes
·
View notes
Text
i bet there were guys in the 1800s who were super fucking Reddit about everything, but no one had the right word yet for why those guys were so annoying. so they just had to wonder
81K notes
·
View notes
Text
Tried to tip a tumblr blog at 1am and it was such a suspicious transaction it immediately put a full fraud freeze on my account
Fortunately, banks no longer just ask 'did you make that transaction' they want to make sure you weren't scammed into making that transaction and 5mins after their call will give away all your money anyway.
This is an honest to goodness life saving movement and I cannot be happier banks are adopting it
Unfortunately, it meant I had to have the most embarrassing financial call of my life
-
Me: Ah yeah I was just trying to tip a tumblr blog
Cash: right and were you directed there by a Facebook link? An Instagram advert?
Me: no I was just on tumblr...on purpose
-
Caah: and this person asked you for money?
Me: oh no they just had a funny story, which happened to be about money and I thought, "wouldn't it be funny if I tipped them"
-
Me: * covering a reblog by reblog update on the adventures my mutual was having *
Cash: okay I don't think that can actually happen though..
Me: It might not have, but i was happy to tip them just because it was funny
-
Cash: and how well do you think you know this person?
Me: *considers explaining how much I know about a beloved mutual without ever knowing their name or face* ... I have no idea who this person is
I think in the end Cash decided there was no saving me from myself
4K notes
·
View notes
Text
I took this photo originally to prove. to a friend with me at the time. that there was a Pigeon in this Tree. and I PROMISE you, I SWEAR it on my LIFE that there is infact a whole pigeon in the tree. it’s that grey pigeonish-shaped blob in the centerish… topish.. part of the tree. there is a bird here.
45 notes
·
View notes
Text
the real horror of jonathan harker's story is seeing a customer outside of work
358 notes
·
View notes
Photo
Very cold Glasgow parakeets. Somewhere up there. I heard them.
28 notes
·
View notes
Text
People really post like "lol this movie's writing is so stupid, why would Anakin, who's from a DESERT PLANET, specifically hate sand?"
I'm from a cold region and I hate the cold. The only unrealistic part about him casually mentioning that he hates sand is him not going into a highly detailed 35 minute rant about different types of sand that all have different specific names based on texture and rock type, and the specific way each individual sand type fucks up different vehicles, droids, items of clothing and orifices when it gets everywhere.
20K notes
·
View notes
Text
being an adult means I can use my big boy money (which is supposed to go towards stupid things like rent or food but who the hell does that) to force people to look at Melly.
look at her. she’s simply so Shaped
10K notes
·
View notes
Text
ATTENTION EVERYBODY
Today (January 20th) is Penguin Awareness Day.
Please be aware of these penguins.
Thank you for your cooperation.
P.S: These penguins are described in alt text.
5K notes
·
View notes
Text
Fun fact! This black glaze works like a chalkboard. I chose it so you could make yourself sad with baby minotaur drawings.
3K notes
·
View notes
Text
I am now (finally) embarking on the last of the LotR audio commentaries I never listened to before: the Production/Post-Production one, with Barrie Osborne (producer), Mark Ordesky (executive producer), Andrew Lesnie (director of photography), John Gilbert (editor), Rick Porras (co-producer), Howard Shore (composer), and Jim Rygiel (visual effects supervisor). A lot more Americans in this group than the previous ones have been. I feel much more out of my depth with this one in terms of figuring out who's talking, but let's see what new stuff they have to say for FotR!
The sound from when Sauron explodes comes from a bunch of sounds they recorded both inside and outside ships in the harbor, as well as the sounds of WWII airplane propellers.
The scenes with Gollum in the prologue were actually some of the last shots they filmed for FotR.
The farmers around the area where they filmed Hobbiton would warn them when people would turn up who weren't supposed to be there, with cameras and whatnot, as well as warning them when planes or choppers would be overhead, so they could prevent (as much as possible) from footage leaking before the movie was released. That warms my heart :)
They used the analogy of a "shell game" when talking about all the different techniques they used to keep the proportions of characters correct with their different sizes. Because they would switch up the techniques between shots, it helped sell the overall effect, because you're not just always looking at a scale double or a bluescreen or what-have-you.
In the scene with Bilbo and Gandalf in the kitchen, they used forced perspective, with the table cut in half so that everything is small for Gandalf and the right size for Bilbo. When Bilbo pours the tea into the teapot, Gandalf handles a small lid on his side, putting it on a little rod that holds it in the right position so it looks like it's sitting on the teapot. Meanwhile, the actual teapot is on Bilbo's side so he can pour the water into it. Also, when Gandalf is first sitting down at the table and turning to get his legs underneath it, if you look closely you can see that when he bumps up against it, the half of the table closer to the camera jiggles a little, but the other half doesn't because it was actually some 5-10 feet away.
In the shot at the party that pans down from the fireworks and the tree, the actual party with all the dancing and everything was shot in a set, so they had to go back to the Hobbiton location (which had already been cleared of the set at that point, I think) and match up that shot to get the tree, and then they composited it together.
The direction for that shot of Minas Tirith when Gandalf goes to research the Ring was to make it look like "Constantinople in the morning." This may be my favorite part of this commentary :)
They needed to scan actors' faces so they could have their digital doubles to work with for certain shots. When they brought in Ian McKellen to scan his face, they said, "We just need to scan your face in a neutral position." He said, "Neutral for me or neutral for Gandalf?" And he demonstrated his own neutral expression, and when he switched to neutral Gandalf, he looked completely different, pursing his lips and furrowing his eyebrows and sucking his cheeks in more. Truly the sign of a gifted actor who knows how to ply his craft.
In the scene where Frodo and Sam are trying to sleep on the road for the first time, originally they were going to end with some sort of animal sniffing around them. First it was a deer, and they also tried a rabbit and maybe some other animals (possible fox appearance???). But that part didn't even make it into the Extended Edition.
Something I never thought about that they had to pay attention to was, because Orthanc is made of shiny material, they had to consider the color and quality of the light reflecting off it. So when they filmed the real location, they would take the camera and pan around the location, then print out stills and put them up around the miniature when they filmed that part of the shot, so they could get the right colors to match each shot they would composite over it, so it would look like both were in the same place. Now that's what I call attention to detail!
On the night they shot the little chase sequence with the Nazgul in the forest, it was actually raining off and on, even though you can't really see it in the movie. That made the ground very muddy, so the Hobbits actually had to be carried back to their first position for each new take so they wouldn't get too much mud on their feet and clothes.
To get the sounds of the trees' "voices" when the orcs in Isengard tear them down, they actually used several animal sounds like whales, moreso than sounds recorded from actual trees.
Bob Anderson, the swordmaster for the films, said they needed to have five copies of every sword for every actor every day they were going to be fighting with them, because that's how likely it is for them to be broken (since the swords actors use for hitting each other are lighter and not made like a real sword). But Richard Taylor wanted to find a way to make the swords more durable, because there are a lot of swords in these movies. So Weta developed a technique to help the stunt swords redistribute the shock from hitting them against each other. They took polyurethane, which Mark Ordesky notes is the same material as skateboard wheels, and they made a sort of sheath of that under the surface of the hilt. None of the swords they made like that ever broke.
The tree that gets thrown down into the chasm in Isengard had to be a miniature so they could get it high enough to drop it as far as they wanted to (and so they wouldn't have to cut down a huge tree). But they had to add little springs and things to make the branches bounce and jiggle properly, rather than just break off, as they would if you just made a little model tree. Little details like that really sell the scale.
In the Nazgul horseback chase scene, they cleared a path for the horses to safely run through the forest. But then they would also get branches and put them on the car or whatever vehicle had the camera, so it would look like they were pushing through more dense foliage, while still keeping the actors and horses safe.
The Council of Elrond was the final piece of the sound mix they had to finish for FotR, and it was down to a matter of hours. One of the things they mentioned having difficulty figuring out what to do with was the moment when Frodo sets the Ring down on the plinth. Originally, there was going to be a murmur of the crowd watching, but it didn't seem to have the gravitas and stunned awe necessary for that moment, so they had to play around with a lot of things before Peter Jackson was satisfied with it.
When Gimli smashes the Ring with his axe, John Rhys-Davies was actually only holding an empty handle, and the axe head was added digitally later so it could shatter.
Barrie Osborne (I think?) commented on something at least Billy Boyd and Dominic Monaghan, especially Dom, started to do in order to make it more believable that the primary actors and the scale doubles are the same people. He noticed that their scale doubles tended to move and walk in a certain way (I assume partly because most of them were Little People, so their physique and proportions are a bit different), and so instead of leaving it up to them to mimic his movements, he started changing the way he moved to match them. That's just really cool.
Originally, they were going to do a bit of a flashback when Boromir asks Aragorn, "Have you ever seen the white tower..." etc. It would have been shot in the same place as the scene where Aragorn is visiting his mother's grave, and would feature Elrond talking to Aragorn about how he's the only one who can wield Anduril and how he needs to take his place as the king of Gondor.
For some of the close-up shots of Gimli in the scene where they first head into Moria, they actually had to use a double - not a scale double! an actual guy who was the same size as John Rhys-Davies! - because John had such a bad reaction to the facial prosthetics that he had to go a few days in between each time he put it on. But he'd had the prosthetics on the day before, and they didn't have time to wait until he could put them on again. So they had to find a double, put on the prosthetics and costume, and then John stood out of frame and spoke the lines, and the double mouthed the words along with him. I would never have guessed!
THANK YOU TO WHOEVER WAS TALKING AND I'M SORRY I COULDN'T RECOGNIZE YOUR VOICE FOR SURE, but someone was talking about "cinematic dark." In other words, how to light a scene so you can see everything that's happening even though you're in a place with hardly any light sources, like in Moria where the only light comes from the torch and Gandalf's staff most of the time. Instead of making it all really dark (*pointed stare at too many movies these days*), they shot it as if there is a source of light, but always very far away, like it's filtering through miles of rocky caverns or something. What that meant practically was that they would only light the characters in silhouette or from the side, never the front. So it would still give the impression that they're in darkness, but you don't have to strain at all to make out what's happening. They also desaturated the colors so everything looked muted, similar to how your vision kind of goes black-and-white in the dark.
One of the fundamental elements for the Moria goblin screeches was an opossum screech. There was some kind of opossum research facility in Wellington that they went to to record what became the foundation of the goblin sounds. Then they took them and re-recorded them in some WWII tunnels to get the right echoey reverb effect. And then for the sounds of them moving, they took sounds from insects like grasshoppers, as well as rattling seashells from the beach against the walls of the tunnels to get a scuttling sort of sound for when they come pouring out of holes in the ceiling.
You know that one shot where Legolas fires an arrow at a goblin archer and the camera follows the arrow all the way into his forehead? I always assumed that whole thing was all CG, but no! Even that had a practical element to it! They set up a camera on a sort of zip line with a bungee cord and sent it down as fast as it could go towards an actual stunt guy in costume! Now that's what I call above and beyond.
They shot a scene that didn't make it into even the Extended Edition of the Fellowship arguing about what they should do next after they leave Moria, with some members having misgivings about going to Lothlorien. I wish we could see that, even though I understand why they needed to keep things moving. They didn't mention if they actually shot this or if it was scrapped by the time they got that far, but there was also a mention of the entry to Lothlorien being much more frantic, as they're chased by orcs and then rescued by a sudden volley of Elven arrows.
There was also once a longer scene between Boromir and Frodo as they're waiting to see if Haldir will let them into Lothlorien. He tells Frodo a story of him getting over the death of one of his comrades. Um...I wanna see these extra scenes!!!
They wanted Lothlorien to feel ethereal and maybe almost slightly in a different universe, because of the Elves and especially Galadriel, who can see into hearts and minds. One of the ways they did that was by diffusing the light on the set so everything seems kind of dreamy. Another way they tweaked things was by bringing out the blues and edging them towards lavender. Yes, yes, Lothlorien is supposed to be golden, but after hearing the explanation about how lavender is actually one of the hardest colors to get to look right on film (the word used was "fragile") and to look good against skin tones, and therefore you don't see it very much in the movies, I can appreciate the subtle ways they tried to make Lothlorien feel distinct.
Originally, they were going to have a scene where the Fellowship goes through some rapids on the Anduin and get ambushed by orc archers. Ultimately, they decided they didn't need that as a story beat at that point, and it would have been very difficult to shoot anyway. Makes me wonder if that influenced the infamous barrel scene from the Hobbit movies, like they dug up some old plans for that....
Except for one wide shot where they used a scale double for Frodo, the entire confrontation between Boromir and Frodo was shot just with Sean Bean and Elijah Wood, no special effects, just strategic blocking and using the slope and different angles to their advantage to always make it look like Frodo is smaller than Boromir.
If I understood Howard Shore correctly, he was inspired to use a boy's choir for Boromir's death when he saw Boromir, after falling to his knees from the first arrow or two, looking up at Merry and Pippin. Boys singing at his death gives a sense of lost innocence, which is appropriate both to Boromir trying to take the Ring as well as to the lost innocence of losing the Hobbits. So it's not just a lament for Boromir, it's also his lament for (as he thinks in the moment, because he knows he's dying) failing the Hobbits.
The original mix for Boromir's death had all the sound effects at full volume, which made the moment even more brutal. Mark Ordesky was saying that he (and probably some others) was thinking it might be better if they pulled back on some of the sound and let the music be louder. Peter Jackson said, "Well, let's try it," and as soon as they turned down the volume, the entire room basically agreed immediately that's how they needed to do it. It's meant to sound and feel almost like you're sinking underwater as Boromir is dying, because that's how it would sound and feel for him.
Oh my goodness, further proof that studio execs shouldn't have a say in the story of a movie. New Line wanted the movie to end with Frodo and Sam paddling across the river, and then an Uruk bursts up from underwater and grabs Frodo, pulling him out of the boat. The Ring somehow comes off the chain, and the Uruk is so enamored with it that he ends up drowning while trying to grab it. Then Sam somehow gets Frodo (and the Ring) back into the boat. Thank goodness they came up with the much better ending we all know and love. Because the people actually involved with writing the movie and telling its story knew that the ending of FotR needs to be about the breaking of the Fellowship, about love and loyalty in the face of great evil. So that's why they went with the ending they did: Sam falls into the water and almost drowns, Frodo saves him, and that paves the way for the incredible emotional high of Frodo leaving the Fellowship, but Sam going with him. And just like Frodo is thinking about how Gandalf talked about how he was meant to find the Ring, Sam is thinking about how Gandalf told him not to leave Frodo. It all ties together so much better.
The last shot for the film was Boromir going over the waterfall. It was in the final cut of the movie just as a previs shot, and Barrie Osborne said he assumed it was going to be a CG effect or something. But finally, while Peter Jackson was in London working on scoring the film - so pretty late in the production - Barrie called him and asked when they were going to shoot that scene. Peter Jackson had forgotten about it! So Barrie had to shoot it, and since they didn't have the actors in New Zealand at that point, they had to get Weta to make a silicon dummy to shoot instead.
54 notes
·
View notes