#don't talk to me about ships in this fucking thing
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modern-day house m.d. episode where the patient is transmasc and on T, and after house reads his file he goes in and is reading off prescriptions like "estradiol cream, finasteride, prescription face wash, prescription deodorant... god, it's like you don't even want to be a man!" and the patient says "just because i wanna be a man doesn't mean i have to suffer all the shitty side effects" and house goes "it's all shitty side effects! being a man sucks!" before tossing the file down on the little tray table thing and leaving.
chase and cameron exchange A Look in the room and then while they're walking down the hall cameron's like "we should talk to him about it - maybe he'd be... happier? if he transitioned?" and chase rolls his eyes and is like "just because he thinks being a man sucks doesn't mean he's trans, every guy hates being a man at least some of the time" and then cameron gives him Another, Slightly Alarmed Look
we cut to house and wilson and wilson's looking at him like he's insane, going "so you... told the patient that being a man sucks?" and house laughs and says "sure did! i wanna know which will take longer - cameron coming to me concerned about my gender, or chase realizing he should be concerned about his gender. her gender? eh, probably easier to just stick with 'his' for now." wilson accuses him of being a sociopath and house looks fake-wounded and says "you know, if i am a sociopath, you're being ableist by attributing my cruel actions to my sociopathy, and if i'm not a sociopath then it's even worse that you're accusing me of being one just because i'm mean."
cuddy approaches house later and tells him that she heard about what he told the patient, and she is required both to make him take sensitivity training and also to provide him resources on transitioning if he wants to pursue that. house asks if him being a woman would make cuddy bisexual, and she raises and eyebrow and says "that ship sailed long ago" and doesn't elaborate on whether she means she isn't into house anymore so it doesn't matter or that she already is bi. house starts cyberstalking her to try to figure out if she slept with any of the women she's friends with on facebook. the team comes in to tell him about a new symptom and he shows them a photo of cuddy from college with a hot girl at a halloween party and is like "do you think they ever fucked? i think they fucked. even if they didn't, i'm gonna imagine they did." foreman tries to get them back on track but chase leans in to get a better look at the photo and it turns out to be wilson in a costume. there's an awkward beat of silence before cameron goes "SO, back to the patient!" and house makes a sort of dismissive "huh? oh, yeah, go test him for [whatever]" while staring intently at the photo.
he confronts wilson about the photo, wilson admits it's him, house starts by going "oh, yeah, but i'm the one having a gender crisis" but accidentally says "sexuality crisis" instead and wilson is like "house do you... do you think i'm hot in that photo?" and then we cut to chase asking cameron if she thinks he could pull off an outfit like that and they discuss it a little while doing a blood draw or LP or whatever. the patient gives them both A Look and is like "you know, you can get wigs and breast forms pretty cheap these days..." and chase is like "hm? oh, yeah i guess one of those costume supply sites would probably have stuff like that huh," and the patient raises his eyebrows at cameron who just shakes her head a tiny bit.
house accuses cuddy of sleeping with his best friend in the clinic lobby and she drags him into her office to ask what the hell he's talking about and he shows her the photo. she's like "yeah, we were at a halloween party together in college, so what?" and house says that wilson makes a really hot chick and asks if that's what awakened cuddy's "bi side," and cuddy just rolls her eyes and tells him to stop projecting his sexuality crisis onto her just because he thinks his best friend is hot. house asks if wilson was at least a good lay and cuddy says "find out for yourself!" before kicking him out of her office again.
house goes back to his office and cameron is pacing outside the door, and she looks nervous when he walks up to her. she follows him into his office and she has clearly prepared A Speech about how if he doesn't like being a man he doesn't have to be, and he doesn't even have to be a woman either, there's options, and it's never too late to transition no matter what people say, and he cuts her off like "yes yes you're very supportive, you clearly aced sensitivity training" and then he has the episode's Epiphany and it turns out that the patient transitioned too early and there was some (largely made-up and not actually backed by irl medical science) complication from starting his transition as a teenager, and the patient is like "oh so you're saying i did this to myself?" and house says "well legally at least, either your parents or the governor of new jersey did it to you - depends on who approved the hormones."
wilson comes up to him at the end and is like "you know, it's okay if you think i'm hot. and it's also okay if you're a woman. if you... ever need any tips on passing as one, i'm happy to help."
the ending is left ambiguous as to house's actual gender identity and, much like the autism episode, it kinda feels like the writers' room was full of heavy debate about whether house should be trans or not. we also never actually circle back to the fact that chase is definitely trans, it never comes up again, and this move pisses off both trans people and allies who wanted it to become A Story Arc and anti-trans people who are mad it even came up in a single episode, absolutely nobody is happy about how they handled that subplot.
#house md#house headcanons#is there a tag for these fan ''episodes''? i feel like someone should be compiling them tbh
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Finally a thing I'm weirdly uniquely qualified to talk about, even if I'm not an expert.
These ships are called tall ships.
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I work at a museum that has a running replica tall ship. Apparently not many replica tall ships are real tall ships, as they don't actually fully run on sails, but have a motor in the bottom that does most of the actual driving. Ours has a small motor only for docking (coast guard regulations), but once on the water, we use the sails to move around.
On many of the motorized replica tall ships, their ropes don't actually do much as they're for display. On ours, each line (ropes with jobs are called lines) does something and the ship has SO FUCKING MANY.
You really wouldn't think you'd need that many lines, surely some of these are just decoration--but don't say that too loud, the captain will hear you and she'll quiz you on each line's name. Yes, every single fucking one of these have names and you need to memorize them to work on the ship.
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We do weeks long training sessions in the spring and fall. It's a lot. And the final exams are BRUTAL. Or so I've heard.
I have not completed the ship training, to be clear. I don't work on the ship.
I work at the museum, NEXT to the ship, and this is all random nonsense I've picked up from that. If anything is wrong, blame me, not the amazing ship crew and wonderful captains.
And yes, as I said earlier, this tall ship is a REPLICA, and therefore is not hundreds of years old, nor has the replica done anything bad. It just serves to teach students and the general public about history and be a working resource for historians.
Anyway, it sounds like some of the previous folks need to take a field trip to my museum and relearn 4th grade level history.
Tall ships are indeed sexy, and not at fault for the actions of some of the shitty people who sailed them.
We need to go back to using sailing ships full time like immediately. Yes it would take longer to get places but the Aesthetic is unmatched
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Like there is nothing sexier hthan this
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The Pure Vanilla top/bottom argument irritates me so much....god I'm so tired
The way I feel GUILTY over the fact that most of the ppl just headcanoned something into their brain and I don't see the appeal much kills the vibe so hard that I suddenly remembered why i haven't shipped anyone in fandoms for more than two years
Like for Pete's sake, leave people be
You see PV as a top? Fine. But keep it to yourself
Do not come to other people to hate comment on wether you hc's are not met with certain art
And yes, top pv IS a headcanon, BECAUSE JUST POINT ME AT LEAST ONE THING THAT IS DOMINANT IN HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH SMILK IN GAME LIKE???? He's literally pure as fuck??????? That's his whole deal????? I might see it with TR, but with his base form??? Awakened??? Tf we are even talking about??????
I'm tired of pretending i like all of shadvani content just because it's them, this debate killed my perception of the ship entirely
#cookie run kingdom#crk#shadowvanilla#pureshadow#shadow milk cookie#vanilla milkshake#pure vanilla cookie#pure vanilla crk
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I've just had the realization...
...that I- *sobs*- I only hyper fixate on doomed from the start ships and I'm kinda pissed about it, so I'm making it everyone's problem.
OKAAAY HERE WE GO!
Merlin and Arthur:
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(There are 5 seasons of romantic/sexual(?) tension I need to cover and not enough time so imma just throw shit out there)
Merlin (a sorcerer/wizard/god/Hiccup Haddock) accidentally gets the job of being Prince Arthur of Camelot's manservant... Bro really didn't want the job. At this time in Camelot, sorcery is illegal but what most don't know is that some are born with magic abilities, so they are convicting and executing innocent people. Soooo yeah, living in the same place as a bunch of anti-witch people and being someone who practices/was born with magic abilities, not good. Eventually Arthur and Merlin became inseparable, Merlin throughout the years has been saving Arthur's life without him knowing and trying to change Arthur's opinion on sorcery without outing himself. In the end Arthur dies (In Merlin's arms btw after he proposed to Merlin) and Merlin is doomed to wander the Earth for all of eternity (Because pookie is basically the wizard god and refuses to die until he sees Arthur again) waiting for Arthur to come back. (SOBS MY EYELIDS OFF)
Megatron and Optimus:
(This is just for TFO, I'm not going to get into the burning shit hole that is TFP, IDW, G-1, and every other wonderful universe's Optimus and Megatron relationship)
Besties/Lovers, inseparable, the ideal relationship in a hard, down on your luck life... Then they realized they were slaves and had two ways of going about taking out their terrible tyrant of a leader (Fucking hate Sentinel). Megs going straight to murder and possibly torture in front of all of Icon (Exposing Sentinel in such a harsh, violent way that would've gone against his moral compass in the beginning of the movie). OP though, has a different approach to expose him to the rest of the world (Sure, is taking someone's head and racking their brain for memories kinda violent, yeah. Does it probably hurtless/is less harmful for big space robots then it is for humans, most likely. It was still a little unsettling for me though) and, unlike Megs, wants to imprison him. Megs got lost in his rage and vengeance (Sasuke core) that made him do a whole lot of things he CAN'T take back, even if he wanted to (He doesn't want to. He's so convinced that he knows what he's doing is morally correct and will fix all his pain). OP was hurt badly emotionally at least (My boi has a whooole lot of trauma) and was actually KILLED by Megs, he has a whole WORLD literally forced onto his shoulders with his new position of a Prime and he (A former mining slave with no education) NEEDS to take care of the whole damn thing. On top of that OP was thrown into war with the Quintessons while probably having to deal with terf battles with the Deceptions, controlling potential riots, politics (ew), and supporting a probably failing economy. ("Thanks Primus," said no one ever. Hi, I'm no one.)
Thorin and Bilbo:
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(I'm talking about the movies, yes I read the book, but shut up because I like the movies and idc what you say)
Strangers to friends to lovers in little more than a year. Thorin was guarded, stoical, rude, and harsh with Bilbo in the beginning because he thought that Bilbo was too pompous and fragile to help in their treacherous journey. And Bilbo (being the pompous lil boi he is) is scared out of his head, full of wonder of the world outside the Shire (enough sass to fill the Earth like the great flood in da Bible), and was basically forced on said treacherous journey, has feelings for Thorin but they are purely physical and fade quickly because of how rude Thorin is to him (very ungentlemanly for a king if you ask him). But over time Bilbo proves that he's more than his best suit and by the heavens, Thorin. Is. Down. BAD. He can defend himself to a certain extent, hot. He can use his wit to get out of almost any situation, hot. He will give up his word and sacrifice his honor on Thorin's name and honesty, hot as fuck man. They basically have a WHOLE MOVIE with them subtly loving on each other... BUT THEN THORIN GETS THE DRAGON SICKNESS!! He goes crazy over cursed dragon gold, throws out Bilbo, and starts a war. Then after like half the movie, he faces the danger and says 'NO MORE!' to the gold, rallies his troops, wins the war, AND BLEEDS OUT AND DIES!! IN BILBO'S ARMS!! Leaving POOR SWEET BILBO to go home, alone, depressed, and CURSED!! Bilbo comes home and everyone thinks he was dead so they're selling (Stealing) his belongings, his name and reputation is dragged through the mud because he went on an AdVeNtUrE, and he's single for the REST OF HIS LIFE!! (They ruin me... Cries around my suspiciously bagginshield shaped fics & fanart)
Ok, I'm done... For now.
Gonna be honest, doing this made me think of more ships Bdko (iykyk), SkyStar, and Hijack (In a lot of fics that I read anyway) are a few of them.
Might do this again it was a good vent, besides no one's gonna see this anyway.
#merthur#megaop#bagginshield#character analysis#? i guess#idk#venting#about my love for these ships#sooooo#not really vent#i'm fucking losing it#i'm so tired#i'm sad#i'm hungry#i can do something about the hungry bit tho#transformers#the hobbit#bbc merlin#relationship analysis#ig
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I'm gonna explode one of these days and all that'll be in my melted brain is your DW art/silly
Not technically an ask, but I just wanted to say that the English dictionary doesn't have enough words to describe how much I fucking LOVE your art >< THE WAY YOU DEPICT ARTHUR AND DELILAH IS SO AWESOME AGDHDHHDH I also really like how you don't care abt ships, because DON'T GET ME WRONG I love me some fruitcake content, but it's so refreshing to see art that's lore-driven yet also so cool and silly ehehehe Sorry if this makes no sense I'm writing this all at 6:18 in the morning because I just scrolled through your entire page and went feral over everything in it @∆@ Proceeds to disintegrate
HEHE I’m glad to see other people care about like The Lore And World Building And Characters Themselves over the shipping. and Similarly nothing really wrong w caring abt the shipping but like idk. the thing I don’t get is how people can care about Only the shipping time after time in every media they consume. doesn’t that get boring. and w this fandom how Widespread the shipping is, it feels like that’s all there is/it’s all anyone here cares about. i know this isn’t true but oh my god can we get More that Isn’t ship content. there’s been a fucking “malfunction incident” and to me it seems like someone might be dead because of it. the toons are kind of in a nightmare scenario trapped in a building with monsters and they’re acting like nothing is wrong. there’s black sludge named after god’s blood just In the building in machines like it’s normal. what are arthur and delilah’s Deals. there’s Something to talk about here but you guys only want to see these two or more characters kiss/worse? ddint you do that with the other media already NDSJJSJSJSKAK
#happy aro week i am sick to bastard death of the pervasiveness of shipping in this fandom HDNSNSNSNSNJDNS#the monarch’s court#dandys world
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Hi! None of my friends are into Naruto so I came to your ask. Please bear with me :,(
It’s nothing serious: just wanted to ramble about Naruto and Sasuke in Naruto Gaiden. They give such huge exes energy it’s both painful and funny to witness.
It’s painful because they both clearly didn’t let go of their feelings. Naruto sends his shadow clone to deal with his own son (or go to his own daughter’s birthday!) but he meets Sasuke in person. And it’s not like it was even necessary! He was pretty comfortable talking about this exact problem on a phone with Kakashi. He could’ve sent Sasuke a letter, he could’ve sent someone else to help him, he could’ve sent him a goddamn clone.
And Sasuke being all bitter with Naruto in that flashback. Kishimoto was literally showing us the real exes behavior and too many people didn’t bat an eye. (I’m really curious how sns deniers explain that scene)
There was a whole ass Hinata humiliation moment with bento. Boruto wanted to return the bento to her because even he knew Naruto would not appreciate it and when Naruto finally got it the only thing he thought about was how Sasuke fed him. Not even a single thought about his wife or at least his children?
Naruto always being there for Sarada while neglecting his own child… wow. I never thought he and Sasuke were that similar. (Also him, and not Sasuke’s wife, telling Sasuke’s daughter about his past. Nah, definitely doesn’t ring a bell lmao)
Naruto thinking of Iruka and Sasuke when talking about love and family. I guess if he really loved his wife he would’ve thought of her too. She’s supposed to be his immediate family now…
I know there are people who are homophobic and just refuse to see the obvious, but there’s literally a bunch of people who are dumb or blind. And of course there’s this special category of dumb who think that Kishimoto “accidentally” created his own story.
I just know he spent many nights sleepless, trying to make ss and nh as realistic as it should be. I wish more people recognized work.
Anyways, sorry for my messy ask. I’m just full of thoughts rn. I almost didn’t include ss moments cuz they’re not even worth mentioning, plus you’ve talked about the forehead poke several times and I agree with everything you said. Thanks for reading or no offense if you decided to skip my ask 🫶
Hi anon!
I think people saw what was going on with Gaiden and that's why it remains Kishimoto's most controversial work. SS shippers really don't like to touch upon it and barely bring it up in their discussions and arguments except for *sometimes* the "because we have you" panel and it's just sometimes because you can't deny how miserable both Sasuke and Sakura look there. Outside of SNS circles, I've noticed the rest of the fandom don't bring it up as often, they'd rather ignore it.
There was a whole ass Hinata humiliation moment with bento. Boruto wanted to return the bento to her because even he knew Naruto would not appreciate it and when Naruto finally got it the only thing he thought about was how Sasuke fed him.
This moment is why it baffles me a bit why people think NH is the better marriage out the two het!ships because Naruto clearly does not give a fuck about that woman just like Sasuke doesn't care about Sakura.
Naruto knew, and Boruto knew that he knew it was made by Hinata especially for him because she loves him. But when Naruto has the opportunity to go meet with Sasuke in person why would he want anything from Hinata? Once again reminding us why for The Last they had to make sure Sasuke wasn't in the village lol.
But you gotta love how Kishimoto expresses what a bento means. It's not about just feeding someone, it's more about that special person sharing it with you.
Boruto thinks of his mom, because well, ofc he would think that's his dad's special person, all kids want to believe their parents are each other's soulmate and love of their lives.
Kishimoto telling us how a bento is not just food for sharing for the sake of feeding someone, it's about being present in the mind and heart of a loved one. That's why for Naruto this moment is so significant, how special he had to be for Sasuke he’d want to share a meal with him (and forcing Sakura to do the same as well) when he was a loser nobody, ahhh my heart. Kishimoto is truly a great tragic romance writer.
I think people sometimes focus too much on deciphering Sarada's true backstory (I get it, it's very juicy), that people kinda overlook Naruto telling us that even after all those years married and having two kids, Sasuke is still his #1 love. A heartbroken Sarada complained that after all those years away Sasuke forgot even her face and she's not blood-related to Sakura, and I find fascinating how Naruto responds "there's something stronger than time and blood... love".
He's been married for 13 years and has two kids and yet all that time and that blood relation won't change that his bond with Sasuke formed out of pure love (because people always say "Sasuke and Naruto didn't even spend that much time together, it doesn't make sense they're obsessed with each other) is the most important one alongside his bond with Iruka. Doesn't matter how many years they go without seeing each other, Naruto will always love Sasuke.
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...i don't have a problem, i don't know what you're talking about.
anyway in other news, I think I know what my NaNo project for this year is going to be.
Also yes, typos are my planning love language, at this point if there aren't a few red squiggles on the screen i'm clearly not doing it properly.
Also also, I absolutely called this scrivener master file for (mostly haikyuu fanfic, there's like 30 fics in this monstrosity) "Not Digimon". I hope no one ever had any expectations that my filing system made sense. Send help.
#my fanfic#planning stuffs#i shooould probably make separate scrivener files#but I only have a couple of bnha fics#and I am still in enough denial to believe it'll stop there#Hope's Fire remains the only fic I have which gets its own scrivener file btw#hence specifying#also the notes/characters file is like....4k#I have a Problem#don't talk to me about ships in this fucking thing#the answer is probably 'yes' though
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People keep on asking for more Baby Robin and Papadile so here is more Baby Robin and Papadile. Now never ask anything from me ever again
#My art#One Piece#Long post#Sir Crocodile#Nico Robin#Alternatively panel 5 would've been a close up of Crocodile's face from Robin's POV where he looks like he's giving her a death glare#Not intentionally he's just a big scary bastard with a Resting Murder Face and Robin is a small traumatized child#But I wanted to focus on the silliness of the moment so you get the goofy version instead#IDK man there's just something very funny to me about the idea of Robin just randomly info-dumping about a subject she's read about#And Crocodile being like ''?????????????????????? The fuck you talking about??''#Robin leaves the ship's kitchen and Crocodile just stares at the tomato like ''...It's a fruit? Forreal?''#(Meanwhile Robin is sweating bullets like ''I called his favorite vegetable a FRUIT right in his FACE he's going to KILL ME'')#Robin grew extra feet from the bottom of her feet to reach the counter and that actually isn't me trying to explain bad art away#In the original Papadile comic there was a panel of Robin doing the dishes with extra feet to reach the sink but I cut it out#(It was a stress relief comic I did not feel like drawing a complicated background in detail) (BUT YES I THOUGHT OF IT)#Nico Robin Age 11 is *more* than capable of cooking Crocodile just does not trust her with his food. At least not yet#She did start doing the dishes unprompted and continues to do so (mostly out of fear). Croc told her she didn't have to but allows it#IDK a lot of people seem to headcanon Crocodile as incapable of cooking and like. Surely Mr ''I don't trust people'' knows how to cook#Like he doesn't have to be a master chef or anything but and maybe he enjoys not HAVING to cook (pain in the ass with one hand + knife/hook#But surely he can cook decent enough. SURELY#Botanists don't @ me I know the ''tomato is a fruit'' thing isn't fully accurate this is just a silly little haha comic
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The future never forgets the events that shaped it The past awaits for better times to come
#something something parallels idk#I just think the way 17yo pearl is always talking about wanting things to change and to grow up because capcom doesnt know what to do w/ he#(besides ´´haha teenager likes shopping´ jokes)#combined by the fact Athena kinda has nothing going post DD because the writers wanted to make it the apollo and phoenix game#could serve as an accidental setting for a young adult discovery+healing from trauma plotline/theme#combined with the ever familiar parallel of being an oversheltered and somewhat pampered kids who lost everything they ever knew#due to a traumatic event and were then forced to an abrupt change from having no freedom to having no idea of anything#but the only thing unchanged is having no autonomy in the situation itself#could serve for something real cool yknow?#(that last bit is ever familiar to us pearlthena fans)#(yes this is ship art (im aroace all my shipart is characters just hanging out or being in agony together))#(no there is no middle ground(i have so much ship art ideas that are just character chatting(and then not ship art that is the same(idk))))#ace attorney#pearl fey#athena cykes#pearlthena#my art#artists on tumblr#illistration#dual destinies spoilers#aa5 spoilers#aa2 spoilers#long as fuck tags boi#BTW pls ignore the hair strand that comes out of nowhere I literally didn't realized I had read the sketch incorrectly until#a day later of posting#And it's eating me alive but I am soooooo lazy. And like I really didn't wanted to render it again. And I still don't so RIP that
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combine their vocabularies and together they could say a lot of superfluous things!
#lychee's trash art#shishikura seiji#seiji shishikura#kaminari denki#denki kaminari#okay hear me out;;;;#shishikami#i don't even know if they have a ship name#bnha#my hero academia#mha fanart#bnha fanart#boku no hero academia#this ship is so fucking funny i need someone to talk at me about it#this one and shinoji or ojishin or whatever#the purple-yellow rivalry is really a thing in bnha#also PLEASe if there are medibang paint users out there#basically crying cannot figure out how to export with accurate colors#i'm googling like crazy about color profiing and i'm too stupid to figure it out;#regardless i'm actually really happy how this turned out though!
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I see that tomrey tag on the ghostbusters au pleaseeeee talk about them 🥺. You're a voice for the people
LOOKS AROUND ALL NERVOUS.
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YEAGH. tomrey..... UMMM. well. Like I said ☝️ my AU my weirdly specific personal tommybeny dynamic.
This is also just kinda tied into my personal hlvrai canon thoughts but like. Ok. When Tommy was like..... probably a teenager..... Benry (a teen-aged Fucking Thing) escaped through a Crack in the fabric between the world of the living and the ghost realm and ended up meeting Tommy who was out on his first ghost bust.
Tommy's like. Pretty in-tune with ghosts and their presences/energies so he just kind of. Decided to befriend Benry on the spot and drag him around with him. I think Bubby and Coomer and Gman I think always. Kept an Eye On Benry because they figured out pretty quickly that Ben wasn't like..... a normal ghost and was some sort of entity.
But all that to say they were just always kind of casually affectionate with eachother to the point where I don't know If it ever was an official like. "Now We Are Partners" thing but it was just kind of like. They just kind of were always like that. Kissies and naps together and just generally joined at the hip. Tommy I think Knows what Benry is and is kinda trying to avoid talking about it for fear of something Happening to Benry.
TLDR they kind of grew up together and it was just a natural and casual progression of their dynamic. They're just kind of goofy I dunno
When the AU kicks off with the Resonance Crossrip, Tommy isn't on the bust where they capture Benry in the trap, otherwise he probably would've protested quite a bit lol.
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have this warmup from yesterday also smiles
#SORRY I have such a weird thing talking about ships I get soscared.#My interest in HLVRAI was always super self contained so I've never like. Talked about stuff like this in the slightest . Oh fuck#Hence also why I have a really specific tommybeny dynamic in my head that's lived there for years but I don't know how to explain#It's so deep rooted and personal it just seems like. An obvious read LMFAO .#Maybe it'll turn into frenrylatta I'm not opposed to that . Smiles#BUT. YEA. YAY.#gbvrai#tommy coolatta#benry#I don't wanna maintag this lol#tomrey#My weirdly specific tommybeny dynamic and me against the world.#THE REAL HLVR VERSION OF MY THOUGHTS ARE ARGUABLY. SADDER .#they make me SIIIIICK#whateverrrrrr. Ya#Transmission
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Gonna be real if you accuse people of misogyny based on their favorite characters and ships, I do not fucking trust your opinion. full stop
#gopher rambles#I'll ship just about anything if i see an interesting angle to it#i love m/f. i love m/m. i love f/f. ships with nbs are uncommon but i love those too#“oh but you talk about m/m so much more so you hate women”#fuck right off please. i love women. but my favorite character flavor is “messy bastard gremlin who feels things begrudgingly”#and most female characters don't get to be that in the genres i prefer#im picky about my ships with female characters because there are so few that fit my preferences#so dont come at me about misogyny for my fandom bullshit. also i fucked your parents. both of them. die mad#vent ish#ok to rb#rant
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#I remember a few years ago there was one artist that really liked Gil and they were constantly drawing him and talking about him#and one day I saw a message from them that Gil started to make them anxious and feel terrible#because of the whole thing in the fandom that revolves around his character and stuff like that#and they've gone tired of him and stopped liking him and moved to other fandom#and at that moment I felt really sad because I loved how they were drawing Gil#and the fact that they stopped liking him their own reasons just made me feel bad as well#and a few years later I understand that person because whenever I see a certain toxic ship and people that are shipping them#just makes me hate myself and him#because I feel like a total hypocrite for liking such terrible character#and I don't know what to do with that feeling because I really don't want to hate Gilgamesh because he means a lot to me#he helped me to get through a lot of tough times and I know that he's much more than this toxic douchebag#and that I love him not because of that trait but still...#like I could've chosen some other character as my fave#someone like Link or Vash or Ichigo from Bleach but no... I've chosen this golden prick...#maybe I am just as fucked up in the head as those people who into *that* toxic relationship...#personal
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Sorry if this might be a rude question but why don’t you just make a seperate account for your nsfw fics?
not rude, it's a valid question! tbh it's a combination of a couple reasons.
i started posting anonymous dead dove batcest fics long before i had the balls to make a tumblr. at first i was content to just leave them unassociated with each other because i didn't really care about them being tied to me. i made this blog to actually show solidarity to my partner who wanted to make a sideblog for Sandman comic stuff so we could cheerlead each other and be brave together, since i've wanted to make a batcest sideblog but i've been nervous about actually having to get it going. (mal ik you're reading this go be brave and actually make your blog so i can cheerlead you damnit-) only did it dawn on me then that i should probably mention the fics i've written on the blog after like, three of them were posted anonymously. and it would've annoyed me to have half of them anonymous and half of them not, because notifications for them would've gone in different places. i could go back and take my fics off anon if i wanted to, but i can't switch the account they're on without taking them down entirely and that'd fuck over people who have them bookmarked already.
which, ties into my second reason, if i made an entire second ao3 account it'd be harder for me to see notifications, reply to stuff, and post things for both accounts because i'd have to constantly switch. and honestly i'd be terrified of accidentally posting on the wrong one on a brain fog day. posting fics is always the most tedious part of writing them for me lol. it's easier for me to stay logged into one account and have all of my stuff in one place for me and just use the anonymous collection when i feel like it. if ao3 pseuds worked like tumblr blogs, where you can't see all my side blogs but i can, i would've used pseuds, but since you can see all pseuds on an ao3, i felt it was a moot point.
and the last reason is i just feel more comfortable being anonymous on ao3 because of the rise in anti culture. on tumblr it's very easy for me to just filter that out and find the people i want to follow and block the people i don't. i don't mind getting hate, on tumblr or on ao3. but i think, for whatever reason you want to blame it on, there's been a massive boom of antis on ao3 who are very entitled about how they read on ao3. i tag extensively, but i just feel safer from getting targeted attacks if everything i write on ao3 isn't attached to one profile. if people like a fic i wrote, want to find more i always link my tumblr in the notes, but if an anti wants to get huffy with me, they can't easily track down my other things. they definitely could if they wanted to, but being anonymous on ao3 just makes me feel more secluded, in a weird way. it's like saying "if you want you can come find me but on here i'm just a weird faceless guy throwing stuff in the void". i've used ao3's anon feature a lot, actually, i used to be a hydra trash party dumpster kid back when that was in it's prime.
i also used to be vaguely popular on a different tumblr blog and my main ao3 and while i think it'd definitely be cool if i got a decent chunk of followers on this blog too, i don't really miss having fanfiction do so well i got targetted hate on all of my fics from the same people, i had my fics stolen, etc. it was really exhausting for me. i have 120+ works on ao3, not counting what's anonymous, and that level of exposure tires me, even when i use my main ao3 to post things that aren't trashy. it's just a weird feeling knowing so many people are subscribed to you on ao3 and what if you post something they won't like because you jumped fandoms again, or you're posting something niche, or you don't think it fills enough fandom tropes to be well-liked. i used to obsessively think like that, and it made me not write the things i wanted to because i cared about numbers. and i don't want to slide back into that hole. writing on anonymous is mostly to remind myself i wrote this for me, and if other people like it, they can come find me, but i don't have to perform like that anymore. if i get a really weird fucked up idea, i can write the really weird fucked up idea. at the end of the day, just makes me more comfortable! but i get it's a super confusing set up from an outsider perspective so, i really don't mind the question, thank you for asking!!
#necrotic festerings#batcest#pro ship#necrotic answerings#tbh asking the question gave me the chance to explain it so ty!#might link this in my about me or my masterlist for ease of access#i don't want to like. overstate how big i was on an old blog bc i was not like. a celebrity by *any* means.#but i had a ship-specific blog and i was certainly a “big name fan” for that specific rarepair#and it like. took over my life when i was a teen#i look back on it fondly now but i really regret that i would obsess so heavily over numbers and what made a fic do well#my favorite fics to write were htp back then bc for htp culture writing on anon was normal since that was during the dreamwidth days#and i just. liked that veil of anonymity and i think i defaulted to that when i decided to finally start posting batcest stuff#(all of this makes me sound so old i'm only 22 i just started fandom really fucking young which i don't recommend)#and when i say one fic got big. i mean it. i have found that fic on instagram and pinterest and tiktok and even. facebook.#do you know what it's like when your fic gets reuploaded to facebook without your permission and you see what boomers think of it.#that was so mortifying.#funnily enough the boomers were actually really nice i was just shocked to find it there scrolling one day.#it was instagram that was super mean to me and traumatized my ass. man ppl dug into me for the tinest things. do not miss that.#anyway the point is#i've tasted vitality and niche fandom status(tm) and i hated both. and i just cannot do that to myself again#ergo#anon on ao3 and a blog to post my thoughts when i have them.#it's a nice system for me#i have some stuff on my main ao3 that toes the line of like. dark dead dove trash.#and i had antis get mad at me bc their fave fluffy fic was written by. gasp. a proshipper.#and yeah that soured me to existence on ao3.#getting into the rise of anti culture is a whole other discussion that'd have me going on for hours but i will shut up now.#wow this got long. i like to fucking talk don't i.
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#i genuinely do not care if people dislike characters that i like#but i stg if i have to read about fucking 'power imbalance' one more time for sol@vellan#as if HE had all the power in during their relationship#bc he was hiding things from her#he had agents (presumably)#and he had thousands of years of knowledge#but in terms of power?#his magic (at the time) is on par with Dorian and Vivan#and politically speaking? he has nothing atm#so yeah#there IS a power imbalance#and its 10000% in Lavellan's favor#miss me with that shit#if she comes to him with curiosity and respect#then they are meeting as equals#is their relationship a fucking mess? absolutely#but not because of that#'He sAyS MeAn tHiNgs aBoUt tHe DaLish!'#babe so did literally everyone else#DAI is the 'lets shit on the Dalish game'#he also approves when you help the Dalish clans and elves in general even despite having personal beef with them#because they did...*checks notes* try to murder him for telling them the truth#that old man is a fucking train wreck but i'm so tired of ppl with disingenuous takes talking down at ppl who like the ship#and acting like they don't know what actually happened in the game#ffs
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i dont have the right kind of mental illness for BBC merlin to actually make this but in my head there's an animatic of hamiltons "satisfied" involving merlin, arthur, and gwen that Haunts Me
#it haunt me#im thinking bout it again cause i got tunes on shuffle and satisfied came on#i love this fucking song#gwen is fucking. eliza.#the trouble is with merlin and arthur because like. it would make sense to have merlin be angeliica bc unrequited love but also not at all#it would be friends not sisters here but like like like#cause angelicas role better suits arthur for the song w/ being 1st born noble but likeeeeeeeeee. him n gwen aren't like.#the way hamilton talks 2 angelica is very merlin 2 arthur I think. could be other way but works best as merlin = hamilton kinda#the goal is fucking. argwen marriage merlin being depressed Just Like Canon Lads#i have like. parts of the song storyboarded in my head#the only thing i can think of is like. fucking. id be switching povs a bunch during the song to make it make sense#like uhh. arthur would be 1st and 2nd reasons. merlin would be 3rd reason.#it would start as merlin switch to arthur when they start talking then back to merlin for 3rd reason#which is WEIRD but thats the only way it would make sense I feel like????????????????????????????????????????/#with merlin its like. idk 1st and 2nd reasons don't work#ive considered doing fuckiing uhh#morgana as angelica and arthur as eliza and mmerlin as hamilton#that WOULD work best but also doesnt quite have vibes I want. i am more of a morgwen girlie idc about mergana#idk the ship names lmao#ALSO arthur would not mak e a good eliza. he is not all sweet and demure and whatever the fuck. so like#i cant win. i cant win but it haunts me sometimes it would be soooooooooooooooooooo#the love triangle drama. it lives in my head i had this idea like a fucking YEAR ago it Haunts Meeeeeeeeeee I can't escape animatic brainro#bbc merlin#i dont even usually post about my merlin bullshit thoughts#but im pullin an all nighter nad also ive lost my sanity I think#its like sinew sinewy sinewy. slipping. strerciing. ougghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh#i will now depart tumblr again for multiple weeks. mwah#lilac post
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