#don't actually do that usually i turn out to be a bad culture fit for servers [in an 'i drift off rapidly' way not an 'everything catches f
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unopenablebox · 1 year ago
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yuletide discord server is really not succeeding at feeding me [social writing activity emotion that leads me to write] and i am instead wasting hours on [nonendorsed fic community server/archives] and it is making me irritable and also causing me to write using weird syntax as displayed here and i had like six hours to write my evil yuletide fic and didn't >:(
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utilitycaster · 2 months ago
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this may seem needlessly finicky but I do actually believe it's important: calling Verin a himbo is just one of many examples where like, one of the cast says something off the cuff and it's not exactly the right word or it is highly contextual, and that is fine because no one is perfect especially in improv, but then it gets repeated ad infinitum within the fandom when it never really fit in the first place. We have Verin's stats and he's decently more intelligent than average with a 13 (smarter than most of Bells Hells for one; as smart as Pike); it's just he's the guy with a bachelor's degree with good grades followed by military service in a family where everyone has two PhDs - Matt said "himbo of the family" the way in a family where most people are exceptionally tall you'd call the 5'11" child the short one. In Call of the Netherdeep he appears as thoughtful and competent and promoted to a difficult position at a very young age, and in the campaign his appearance is simultaneously as a leader of troops in a dangerous mission, and someone who cares enough about poetry from a completely foreign and distant culture to have tried to learn more about it. I'm sorry, but if you're using the word "himbo" I don't think you're processing a thing about the character yourself; you're just the latest repetition in a game of telephone that's been going on since mid-2021.
And that's not deeply bad on the surface, and I'm using Verin not because he is the character most wronged by this sort of thing but because he's recent and it's really clear where the word came from and that it's not a good assessment, but something I happen to have a decent knack for is pattern recognition in language. I usually find it really easy to pick up on when someone's plagiarized because of the language and pattern shifts. I tend to remember urls and out of place words well. So I do tend to notice when everyone suddenly starts using a single turn of phrase and I tend to flag it. Sometimes that's not bad; sometimes it means everyone came to a similar conclusion and that's the best way to express that conclusion. But like, when Taliesin called the Yios episode a gas-leak episode and the entire fandom started parroting it? The line "bone-dry takes"? The fact that a lot of ship defenses I see were phrased precisely as "I have eyes"? without actually talking about the ship itself? the fact that I've seen a spike in the use of the term "ontologically evil" including in myself and not all uses are actually correct? And extending this beyond strictly language but consider any headcanon with minimal textual support that catches like wildfire (sidebar: remember how we make, or made fun of the SPREAD THIS LIKE WILDFIRE tendency on Tumblr a decade ago? same concept of repetition of a specific turn of phrase without internalizing) all sort of ping this.
And it's fine, truly, to come to fandom and turn off your brain. I know this will sound sarcastic from me, and that's because I don't personally agree, but I do strongly agree that you can do what you want in fandom and you don't have to listen to my opinions so in the end, yeah, it's fine because I am not the arbiter of "fine". But I think critical thought is a vital exercise and I think precision with language is part of it and so if you find yourself using the same exact words and thoughts as everyone else, that should, ideally, trigger a process of "but are these the right words? what do I see when I see this character and how would I describe them? do I agree with this assessment?" Fandom is an interesting and easier microcosm than reality in which to start doing that.
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uss-genderprise · 7 months ago
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okay the new episode has people poking my sleeping special interest like a bear and it was about time to wake it from hibernation anyway so here are some fun facts about welsh fairies
it's spelled fairy. it's always spelled fairy. not faerie, faery, fae, or fey. fairy. please. or tylwyth teg if you want to be proper about it
fairies are not inherently malevolent. they work by their own rules that sometimes don't make sense to humans but there are rules, if you pay attention.
yes fairies will punish you for doing something they don't want you to do
they will also reward you for doing things they do want you to do
fairy rings are circles of green grass. they sometimes how up as a different shade of green than the grass around it and are generally markers of where fairies dance, as well as portals to the fairy realm. mushrooms aren't really a thing for that in welsh folklore.
string and bones and flowers are man-made and possibly supposed to bind or protect against fairies (though i haven't seen anything quite like what we see in the episode described in any of my sources) but generally breaking one of those doesn't immediately anger fairies, just lets them in to affect whoever put the ward up in the first place. that's not called a fairy circle.
changelings exist in welsh folklore. have fun with your theories.
fairies will generally let you leave the fairy world if you ask nicely. yes even if you've eaten the food and drank the drinks
however time moves differently so when you come back you might be super old and/or turn to dust the moment someone touches you
dancing is a different thing tho. they don't exactly want you to stay dancing with them until you die of exhaustion but like that's on you my dude get your friends to help you
if you broke fairy rules like kicking them out of their meadow to build a castle they will count eight* generations** and come back to turn that castle into a lake and drown everyone inside. you have been warned (repeatedly. usually by old ladies and/or bards and/or birds or sometimes just. A Voice™)
* the number of generations can and does vary but in welsh folklore it's generally 8 that's an important number, not 3 or 7.
** also the way generations are counted is. weird. idk if it's that i'm bad at math or bad at welsh or that the book i read explaining this is over 100 years old but i don't think i fully got how many generations this actually is.
oh and they only wait if you beg enough otherwise they kill you now
so basically. no getting trapped in the fairy world as punishment. they just kill you
personally i think the closest thing in welsh folklore to that old woman is a weird lady but even that isn't a great fit
yeah fairies bend time and space to always be far away from you if they want to but that's generally because they're trying to avoid you not following you at a distance
i am fully aware rtd probably couldn't care less about any of this. he definitely didn't do the work that i did to learn all this and incorporating this into your theories is probably shooting yourself in the foot as far as actually being correct goes. HOWEVER i do think it's more interesting and fun this way :) theories are gonna be wrong anyway might as well respect the culture that's inspiring them while we're at it yeah?
i will cite my sources if anyone asks but i doubt many people care to read hundreds of pages of edwardian non fiction novels just to fact check me. trust me on this guys
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therollingriceball · 3 months ago
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(demi) Aventurine x (bisexual) Female!Reader // tw on my interpretation of Aventurine's past // kind of character study writing based on my personal sexuality hcs for him
At first, Aventurine never really thought much about falling in love anymore. After everything he went through, it was quite the natural thing to do.
It's not like sex and what came with it repulse him. Sure, it still does whenever he felt like he's not in charge. That reason alone made him avoid doing it with men as much as possible; most of the guys who wanted to do it with him wanted him to be the submissive one and he doesn't like it as much as it brought bad flashbacks.
But he doesn't really know if he's completely straight or not, because putting that aside he does admit he got attracted to men sometimes. Though to be fair, since he's the last of his people, he at least thought to actually fall in love with someone who could have a family with him, and most of the time those kind of people are female. Or born and assigned at female at birth.
By now, he knew people usually had a label dangling with them, whether they're attracted to the 'opposite gender' or the 'same gender'--- a concept that was foreign when he was just a child named Kakavasha. The Avgin's concept of attractions were rather unique for the universe, it seems. It's not like they were conservative as some other faraway planets probably does-- in fact, it was so open that most people doesn't put labels on it. Love just happened in their culture, there's no need for labels.
Why he's mentioning these on his thought, you wonder?
You spent a few times with him, as a 'friend' or so he called, when he realized an unfamiliar feeling. A feeling of warmth were resurrected in his cold, unassuming heart, where he wanted to keep you close as much as possible. He's not even sure it's relevant to the feeling of friendship anymore--- and that's where he noticed it might be more than friendship and curiosity, but love.
It's not like he hadn't had crushes before meeting you. He had a few people that interest him, but he usually put those feelings aside for the sake of his work. He thought if he puts these feelings aside for a while, it'll be gone as much as his other thoughts.
At least, until you mentioned a feminine name as your ex, and he felt heartbroken.
By now, he knew about how people had labels with them well, and the one that fits your attraction might've not been suitable for him.
---
You called him out for avoiding you ever since you mentioned your ex. What you didn't know was that he always did that for things he deemed as unattainable flower. It was something he's much more comfortable to do upon losing a lot of things in his life.
But you had no way of knowing that, and thought he's just not comfortable befriending you anymore because of those labels on you. And to those, he broke his silence.
"There's no way I would hate you just because of that!"
"Then what, Aventurine? I'm starting to lose clues!"
"Because," Aventurine avoided your gaze as much as possible as his face were blushing. "I don't want to trouble you if I fell in love with you. After all--"
"Wait!"
You were dumbfounded, but only for a second. Your face grew red as you realized it was a love confession, and that he had a misunderstanding--- and no, actually you both did. You thought he wouldn't like you that way because of similar reasoning. There are a few rumors going on about him, after all----
"....Idiot. I'm actually bisexual." you sighed out loud as you declared. "And I do love you back."
Turned out, you weren't an unattainable flower, at all.
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bonefall · 7 months ago
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Thoughts on Wasp? I like the idea of cats joining that turn out that the Clans aren’t great… but also it feels… weird? Like it seems like another “lazy cat bad” on some levels. I don’t mind him not joining the Clans but these “outsider learns they’re not fit for the Clans” things always give me a pause from the Erins. Also interested in how you would handle him!
Moonkitti's video on him is really well worded, if you haven't seen it yet. I do think he's different from the way that other books tend to portray outsiders in that they are saying that he was driven away by the xenophobia of the Clans... but.
They still make him extremely disinterested in Clan life while he's in ThunderClan. I think that was a massive blunder to write, if the thing they're trying to say is "XENOPHOBIA PREVENTS OTHERWISE ENTHUSIASTIC MIGRATION"
It would have hit harder if it was Wafflepaw who tried to run to RiverClan, got assaulted, and then didn't want to be a Clan cat anymore.
Wafflepaw WANTS to be a warrior. Wasp did not. It reads more like Wasp getting hate crime'd was a "last straw" more than THE reason why he won't stay.
That's where you're getting that vibe they're saying "lazy cat bad," imo. It's a bit different from usual, but it still seems like the narrative is saying that Wasp really didn't belong here anyway.
(no, Nightheart's moment where he looks at the camera and says "he could have been fine!" doesn't change that they showed, in their text, with the actions they wrote, that Wasp was not enjoying being part of the Clans anyway. If that was their intended thesis, their writing was sloppy.)
It feels especially weird that Bee didn't go with Frostpaw. Bee was the character with a lot more setup and that strange dream. A lot of people were confusing Bee and Wasp when the book first came out and I don't blame them.
Most importantly, you can't talk about Wasp without also mentioning one of THE worst lines I think has ever been written into a Warrior Cats book. The part where tigerHeartstar says, "Those cats who just committed a hate crime were perfectly good people before the evil dictator took over. If we kill the evil dictator, I'm sure they'll CHANGE BACK"
I'm still REELING. Fuck you MEAAAN "CHANGE BACK????" CHANGE BACK? LIKE BEING A BIGOT IS UNCOMFORTABLE SHOES???
CHANGE BACK... me bringing my evil dollars up to the villain store and exchanging it for racism coins... change back...
So when I get around to it, I'm going to evaluate if Wasp is even actually necessary in the form he's in. BB is already about xenophobia and bigotry and the harm it does. Frostpaw has no shortage of examples to witness what Thistle Law is, and what it does to those excluded from Clan Culture.
When I first made my Family Tree for RiverClan, I actually ended up making Splashstar's MOM, Havenpelt, an ex-rogue. I think seeing him order a hate crime against his own mother would be a LOT more impactful here, actually.
What Frostpaw DOES need is allies and friends. I'm already starting by expanding her little "DND Party," a word I'm using to affectionately refer to some cats who will be following her home from her pilgrimage to the Park. 99% chance that Nightheart is going to become a permanent member of this party, joining RiverClan at the end of ASC. Waffle will be another. She'll probably also pick up a Tribe cat.
Wasp will be on this party, but I won't decide what happens to them until I see what that last book has in store. Who knows, he might come back (though I hope not, run as far away from these ghouls as possible Wasp!!)
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hmmmm. Debating makin this post but sure. Fuck it.
context: Sunny felt really hurt over how Phil introduced her to Talullah and some folks are interpreting is as Phil were cruel or that he's tryna be like more fucked up after purgetory
Disclaimer: Sunny is a kid and has every fuckin right to feel how she feels, and interpret things how she does, and it would be great if they talked and figured shit out. Disclaimer over.
Post: Ngl fellas, introducin someone with some banter about a topic you don't see em as insecure about is just kinda summit you Fuckin Do in north england. YUP EVEN WITH THE LITTLENS. My Mam and Dad did it with me nd my sister as a kid, my parents close friends would to it with us, my friends rents do it with them, my mates do with to me, I do it with them. It's like, kinda a thing that just happens,,, It's part of the culture. especially if the person you're introducing them too is nervous, cause its an ice breaker. Like "hey the person you're scared of is a person like you, look they can handle a bit of banter, its all fine we're friends here" type vibes!
Usually, you preface or end it with a compliment to show you're genuine feelings, and usually you don't do it with someone when it's your first meeting with em, but you'll take the piss out of someone you like to show that you like them yknow? Especially if you've like done other shit to establish yous appreciate that thing you're making fun of em about (like qPhil givin Sunny another pretty crown cause she likes gifts and pretty things and feeling like a princess).
You'd also go for something that you don't acutally feel negateiely about, obviously. Phil doesn't give a shit that she and tubbo steal, thats just a like thing that happens sometimes that you can roll your eyes at but whatever kids gonna nick shit /affectionate. It's not a fuckin insult coming from a place to shame or correct, it's intended to be banter, yknow?
Like, its a show that you like the person and know summit about the person and also believe they can handle a bit of banter at their expense. ESPECIALLY if you've seen em take the piss out of you, someone else, or themselves, cause then it's like "oh word you like to play with this dynamic, okay"
And like, does it suck when you misjudge? Absolutely. Does it suck when someone chooses the wrong topic and gets at summit you're genuinely insecure about? Yes. I've had convos with mine being like 'hey can you not use this topic when you're doin banter' and thats like, really fair to do. There are also like more casual ways to tell em to knock it off like, turning it back on them, or lampshadin it etc which are like, accepted way to tell someone to back down a bit, because it's just like. A thing you do here!
Like qPhil takes the piss out of everyone he loves, chayanne and talullah get it all the time, tubbo (the godparents of his kids) gets it SO much, so does fit, so does Etoiles, like its truly is like, just a fuckin, part of friendships.
TO REITERATE. SUNNY HAS EVERY FUCKIN RIGHT TO FEEL THE WAY SHE DOES! SHE IS A KID, SHE'S NOT FROM THE SAME CULTURAL BACKGROUN, SHE DOESN'T KNOW PHIL THAT WELL NOR PHIL AND TUBBOS RELATIONSHIP!!
Did qPhil put his foot in it? Yes. Do they need to have a natter and settle things? Yes.
But it would be fuckin Lovely if we didnae start up "Phil is actually being a bad person and purpose and cc!Phil is making the choice for his character to be bad" when it's just like, a cultural difference from him being northern again
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leporellian · 22 days ago
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How do you currently reconcile being a Onestar super fan with being a ‘women who deserve better in warrior cats’ super fan with the ‘new’ stuff written into Onestar’ Confession? This is absolutely not an attack I’m just interested in your opinions. And your opinions on Smoke in Onestar’s Confession. As the only Smoke (specifically from Onestar’s Confession) super fan in the world, I need to hear your opinions. I don’t hate Onestar as a character at all, he’s super fun, I just like discussing warrior cats.
this is a really good question!
thinking about it it also made me realize that nearly all of my favorite fictional characters have moments where they throw other classes of people under the bus in a moment of weakness usually spurred on by living in a Horrible System. and it's an interesting combination of, on one hand, 'hm maybe don't deal with your problems like that!' and 'i absolutely get 100% why this character is acting like this and feel bad for them'. for example, because i've been getting back into the figaro operas hard recently, both of my two favorites- marcellina and figaro- do this. marcellina pins a lot of her problems on susanna and doesn't seem particularly concerned about her being in an unsafe situation with count almaviva, but then after a while we realize this is largely probably because marcellina's projecting hard and she is a much nicer person towards susanna once she sorts her own self-loathing out a bit. when figaro has his Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria moment he channels it into an aria about how women are always out to deceive men, but it's easy to read between the lines, realize that he's more inclining towards people in general being Out To Deceive Others with the kind of brutal treatment ultra-classist society has dealt him (combined with a culture where turning on others to fit a social norm is the norm) and it's like... yeah you're being a wee jackass for a minute here but i get why you're like this dude.
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so in warrior cats i think this is the case too. especially pre-power of three, windclan is seemingly considered the lowest social rank of the four clans. they are often joked about for being weak and cowards, and suffer at the hands of all 3 other clans (whether it's being driven out, or having gorsepaw killed, or being attacked Right After coming back, or having the war criminal that nearly killed them all be held in prison by a supposed 'ally').
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so what makes a lot of windclan characters FUN to me is that they take these sort of common rages placed on them and instead of realizing 'wait a minute, its almost like this whole clan system just encourages violence and paranoia and suffering and we just end up being the most common interclan victims of that' they go 'actually clearly this has to be Someone Else Causing The Problem and i Have to Take it Out on Them'.
this is also why i really love mudclaw and consider him such a tragic figure- his grandmother and father were killed by the endless wheel of violence, only causing him to fall into it further, wriggle himself deeper into it as worse and worse things happen to the clan he loves, and then that obsessive paranoia of everyone else becomes applied to his own clan and his people he was meant to protect in the end. he's so shakespearean and i love him for that
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so anyway onestar basically also has all this- he takes all the stress that exists as being the least high-up cog in the system, and then is like 'omg what if i project it on someone else and use her and have an affair! this won't end well' and i think that's really fun. is he a jerk for that? yeah but i also think that it's understandable and just like... woaw living in a system based on fear and paranoia makes people do horrible things to each other, that's crazy.
onestar's confession is very obviously an extremely fast-written book even by warrior cats standards (imo it was obvious it was thrown into the schedule bc the erins didn't expect the super edition vote to go the way it did and were caught unawares), and also tbh i do not have as much stamina as i used to have reading these books LMAO. i think it really simplifies both onestar and mudclaw in ways that i really don't vibe with. HOWEVER i do think some of its concepts (ie brushpaw and the whole thing with the kittypets) are fun.
i think however it'd be more fitting if instead of worrying so much about his Horrible Bastard Son Coming To Light onestar just kind of... forgot about smoke. he's the most neurotic man given he was already sososcared and then mudclaw kind of passed the paranoid personality disorder buck to him with the rebellion. he's gonna be like 'hm that's not a problem rn' until it Is and i think that would be a much more interesting way to deal with his character.
TLDR i am a cycle of violence enjoyer i guessss
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b1asho · 4 months ago
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So sorry for the spam!! I saw your post about the Rosettians and went a bit silly scrolling through your page 😭😭 I love your work!!
Two questions: is there a place I can read more about your story, and do you allow people to make characters of your species?
Also, where do you get inspiration / info for your work if you don’t mind me asking? I’ve been wanting to make my own xenofiction/alien story and I’d love to hear any tips you have!!
Thank you and have a lovely morning/evening/night!
Alas, other than deviantart, I don't have anywhere else I post art or anything (everything there is a mess, but i do have a lot more posts and usually writing on those posts if you want to know more before i get around to bringing it over here) (https://www.deviantart.com/blasho)
I love when people do characters and stuff from my world! (Just make sure you say it's mine, etc etc ) Tag me in anything you make, I really like seeing it
I get information and inspiration from here on earth, of course!!
It wasnt on purpsoe, but i got my start watching just a Lot of nature documentaries, it's an easy way to absorb a lot of the basics and get to see how actual organisms move and learn all the weird stuff they do, all the weird stuff that they evolved to survive in their habitat, and in general get stuff in the back of your mind you can use to make your own stuff and add design or behavior characteristics to your guys. For anything in depth....research articles and papers on google? That's what I use
I try and smooth mine over a little and add other stuff to them so they aren't cut and dry Exactly like one animal or another, but its inevitable and also part of the fun that they do look and act a little like animals we're familiar with (or even looklike humans)
I'd also say start reading/watching/etc other scifi, fantasy, etc, even bad ones, it helps get an understanding of what's already out there and can give you some ideas on what you want to have in your own world/how to approach some things in your world (like cultures or how their society works) nonfiction can even help with this in the same way nature documentaries helped me
The rest really depends on what story you want to tell/what aliens you want to have (more realistic would mean a lot more research and puts more limits on what you can do, but working with and around that can be fun XD )
I'd say if you want to turn a mindscape idea into a story, definitely work towards locking down the basics at some point (like how many aliens are you going to have? Whats the tone of the story? Is it a hard scifi or soft scifi? What's each of their general vibe/how can you fit that with their design or culture? Where do they live that gives them that design/where are they living now? That stuff) and build from there
Its easier to start small and just start designing little guys and then refining them along the way (though if you already have specific stuff in mind and are working towards that purpose then this streamlines a bit.)
Thanks for asking!! Hopefully this isn't too long
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tellurian-in-aristasia · 4 days ago
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The English Magazine, volume 7, circa 1990.
The English Magazine is a Romantia publication, edited by, and largely written by, Priscilla Langridge under a variety of names. It is Romantia at it's most dense, and I will be quite honest, boring. It's largely essays about why modern culture is bad. Pit crit, all pit crit. For this reason I've mostly ignored reading through it.
But I was recently skimming through it and found an article by "Pippit", a familiar name that frequently wrote "pippsy" style articles full of whimsy and silliness. This article was just a review of a handful of albums, so I was quite shocked to see what appears to be outright Holocaust denial as a silly little aside.
Since the Lux Madriana days, the proto-Aristasians have been vocal about the fact that they don't believe in evolution (it simply doesn't fit in their view of history and the ages of gold and iron), and here that "myth" is alongside the phrase "German genocide". And here it is not just a myth, but a "dull, malevolent" myth. A very peculiar statement to make, if one did not actually believe such a thing.
I feel like many of the controversial statements they made, particularly in this era, were shrouded in a few layers of doubt, so they could turn around and say "you foolish bongos misunderstand things on purpose!", but this statement seems plain as day and I just can't think of another "German genocide" they might pretend to be talking about, or why such a thing might be a "dull, malevolent myth".
As usual for such posts about these types of things, I would like to point out that these types of opinions were later well-hidden by the Aristasian foundresses in their later-years. I do not assume this is an opinion shared by any of the girls in virtual Aristasia or in Madrian spaces. This seems a largely Miss Martindale and Miss Langridge belief.
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mikkeneko · 2 years ago
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For choose violence ask game: 6, 12, 21, 24 (I was thinking mdzs but if you prefer to do them for another fandom go for it!)
Lots of options! Starting from the top!
6. which ship fans are the most annoying? ... for SVSSS.
I considered this for MDZS, but nothing really fit the bill. Other people doing this meme have named some subsets of WangXian stans, and while I can see the frustration, my OTP is also WangXian so those don't usually annoy me personally. XiYao and other 3Zun combos don't impinge on my enjoyment any, various F/F shippers are fine, juniors shippers bounce right off me... there are some specific types of character stans that annoy me but not so much ship fans.
However, I'd say that there is a specific subset of ship fans in SVSSS that do annoy the heck out of me -- LiuJiu shippers who seem to have decided that Shen Jiu is the actual one true hero of SVSSS and Liu Qingge is the one sole, shining source of reason who Understood Him (what?) and every other character is a horrible monster for doing him dirty. This character assassination starts at Luo Binghe (okay fair) extends to Shen Yuan (he didn't even get there until SJ was dead!) and Yue Qingyuan (c'mon, really?) and around the point where the ship thesis was explaining how Mu Qingfang was actually a horrible monster who denied medical care to all the disciples on Qing Jing Peak out of unfounded malicious spite against Shen Jiu, I was turned off this particular mindset quite permanently.
12. the unpopular character that you actually like and why more people should like them... also for SVSSS
I dunno that I've got one of these. I think I don't tend to get into fandoms where the characters I like are broadly unpopular. There are characters who are divisive, but they tend to have fervent defenders as well as detractors (Anders from DA, Jiang Cheng from MDZS.) And characters that are broadly unpopular, well, I don't usually like them much either.
How about Zhuzhi-lang? I like Zhuzhi-lang. I don't know that he's unpopular so much that generally just doesn't seem to get much attention overall. Same for Tianlang-jun, maybe. Anyway what I like about ZZL specifically is that particular combination of sweet, good-hearted nature and absolutely blue and orange morality. You showed kindness to me and I love you! Now I will repay you by completely ruining your life. This step is completely logical and I can't see how anyone else wouldn't get it.
21. part of canon you think is overhyped... for MDZS
Guanyin Temple. I will not elaborate.
24. topic that brings up the most rancid discourse... for MDZS
Absolutely everything relating to the Jiang family dysfunction. You can get takes in a spectrum running from "Yu Ziyuan was right to treat Wei Wuxian as she did because he was a bad seed and it doesn't count as abuse because it was normal for the setting" to "suggesting there's any kind of complex dynamics at play or that any of the people involved are any more complicated than a 2d papercut monster is abuse apologism" to "Jiang Cheng should simply have Understood that everything his parents and culture taught him was completely wrong, on his own, in a vacuum, as a teenager" to "Jiang Yanli should have made her parents stop being abusive, this is a reasonable thing to expect a teenager girl to accomplish" and they are all very bad
🔥 choose violence ask game 🔥
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izzyspussy · 1 year ago
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Hiya Jack! For the OTP ask, Roy/Jamie/Keeley and 22, 56 and 58. If three is too greedy, pick and choose as you see fit. Please and thank you. <3
What reminds each of their partner?
Roy and Jamie will never tell each other but they are both genuinely reminded of each other by actual muppets. The reason they won't tell each other is not because they don't want to be insulting (they do want to be insulting) but because they feel sentimental about it lmfaooo. Jamie will see Sam Eagle or Oscar the Grouch somewhere and get misty eyed alsfjksk. For Roy is pretty much any fucking muppet 'cause he's the one who said it, but most particularly Rowlf and Janis. These two are also reminded of each other by certain shades of blue. Keeley is reminded of her boys by Richmond colors, by the brand Jamie's always wearing, by anything all-black that isn't usually black, and by basically any football stuff. She also has "their song" for each one of them and them as a throuple. (I don't listen to the kind of music she listens to, so I don't have specific songs to tell you.) She also really loves both of their accents and she thinks of them whenever she hears someone speak like them. Roy is reminded of both Keeley and Jamie (and Phoebe) by the color pink. He's reminded of Jamie by his own various Three Lions stuff, now lol. He's reminded of Keeley when he cooks or reads (the latter reminds him of Phoebe too). He's reminded of Keeley any time he takes a moment to fucking chill out and appreciate his surroundings. He's reminded of her (and now Phoebe too lmao) by the music Keeley listens to. He's not really that much of a music guy himself, so whatever music he does know will remind him of one of them tbh, since they're both passionate about what they like. He's reminded of Keeley by his own shitty handwriting lmfao. Listen. He's always thinking about them. Jamie is reminded of Keeley whenever he's doing something or behaving in a way he feels is responsible/kind/mature. He doesn't exactly credit her for him doing that, he knows he's the one who's accountable for his actions both bad and good, but she was the first person (other than his mom) who ever had any expectation of him to be "good" or belief that he could be, and that was a really important thing for him! He also thinks of her any time he's enjoying something he thinks is fancy or, like, sophisticated or "cultured" or whatever (like plays, etc). He also has a "their song" for her (not for Roy, their "song" is football wlkjrlkskf), and they had a sort of battle of the bands once where they blew out the speakers of Jamie's surround sound stereo and also Roy's patience, so the songs the two of them used for that remind him of her too.
What do they do turn the other on/put them in the mood?
Well, Jamie is RoyKeeley's little sexbot puppy, so they can pretty much turn him on just by telling him to be alsfjkkw. In particular though, he gets really weak kneed and easy by being petted/caressed, praised with that certain tone, or made to feel special in some way - nice individualized attention from Roy, being compared favorably to someone (other than Roy), an elaborate date or gesture, etc. These things give him a sort of "time to make love" kind of arousal. He wants more of the intimate/special feeling and he wants to make them feel as good as he does, and some very sweet sex is a great way to do that. For a more "time to fuck" type of arousal, Jamie can always be reliably worked up by a little roughhousing or pets/caresses that are particularly possessive (grabbing his throat or patting his ass or circling his wrists, etc, regardless of if it's rough or gentle). Being sexually teased/denied/having to watch (even just Roy and Keeley kissing if he can't join them for whatever reason) will also get him this type of aroused. And also of course winning a match, but that's not really something either of them do (although Roy will claim credit for it sometimes lol). The two most sure-fire ways for Jamie to turn one of them on are opposites qljisk. He can be an absolute brat and make them want to put him in his place, or he can be incredibly sweet and submissive and make them want to make use of that. When he's preemptively submissive, Roy always wants to test him, see how much he can make Jamie do for him, and he likes to assign him tasks that aren't necessarily explicitly sexual as a sort of tease for both of them. Keeley doesn't really see the appeal of that, her sex is generally much less convoluted than theirs lmfao. When Jamie's sweet she wants to reward him. Jamie also really good at putting very specific inflections into his patterns of speech, so he can turn a completely mundane phrase into something fucking filthy through tone alone and then say it normally later to be an unconscionable tease in public lmao. He can also rev Roy up by making him jealous. This one doesn't work on Keeley, for obvious reasons.
Who’s more likely to hold a grudge after an argument?
I actually don't think any of them really hold grudges, at least not against each other or about real arguments. Like, Roy has a grudge against Carragher, and he held his grudge against Trent for forever, but those are from an apparent mutual dislike and a distant devastating insult respectively. Having an argument or even full on fight with someone you have a personal relationship with is something totally different from those. I also think all three of them have tempers, but they are also all three fully cognizant of those tempers and take deliberate steps to control them or at least mitigate their effects. This is especially true for Jamie and Roy, who are both very scared of hurting people they love. Keeley holds the same type of grudge that Roy does, against strangers or near strangers or acquaintances or whatever that she'll hold onto for foreeeeeever, but she's extremely quick to forgive someone she cares about no matter how dramatic her anger was when her temper snapped with them. All it really takes for any of them is an open discussion of what upset them and a genuine, self-aware apology to get them past things. The only time they'll hold "grudges" with each other is over stuff that doesn't actually matter. Like if one of them eats someone else's special snack, or jokingly insults a musician they like, etc.
OTP Asks
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hiding-under-the-willow · 2 years ago
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Uh, hello.
I'm very new to tumblr, and i'm not exactly sure how it works.
i was wondering if you could give me some basic tumblr rules and etiquette?
like how reblogs and stuff work.
I'm just really worried i'm doing something wrong, and i don't want people to get mad at me for it.
I feel like the number one way I can suggest figuring out the social etiquette of tumblr is just to follow blogs you like and observe how they use the site and just like work from there, that's how I figured out the site when I joined at least. Back when I joined there weren't actually a lot of people joining so there wasn't a lot of guidance but the site's been seeing a lot of user migration the last year or two so there are plenty of posts circling around with like tips on how to use the site and the general culture and such if that's the kind of stuff you're looking for though.
Generally, reblogs are appreciated, especially by artists since it's the best way for their work to reach new people. People will try to claim likes do nothing and so you should always reblog, this is generally a lie. Reblogs do more for artists but its not like it's the end of the world if you don't reblog every post you like that's just some weird moral panic bullshit people get on every once in awhile. Usually if someone doesn't want a post reblogged they'll say it explicitly in the post or tags so that's not something you need to be paranoid about. People talk in the tags on reblogs and original posts. If you're reblogging a text post or art op is probably always gonna be chill with you talking about the post in the tag, in fact that's the more common way here to leave praise for art rather than leaving actual comments.
I keep my reblogs and most of my personal posts on a separate blog but that's like a personal organizational thing I like having my art all easily accessible in the same place. If you're a content creator of some kind it's totally chill to have all of your personal work and all of your reblogs on the same blog. Really how much you organize or split up stuff is up to you. Some people have different blogs for every fandom they're in, some people put everything in one place. Some people tag everything thoroughly some people don't tag anything. It's really just up to you what kind of organization you want to have and what stuff you want to keep track of on your blog.
Block people you don't want to interact with. Block tags you don't want to see. Unfollow people whenever where ever for whatever reason and don't feel bad about it. Curate your experience on this site as much as possible. It's one of the best social media sites in terms of personalizing your experience by far and that's something you should absolutely take advantage of. Don't force yourself to engage in discourse you don't care about, don't harass people for anything, don't get pressured into reblogging serious political posts if you don't want to, turn your gaze away from anything you don't want to see. It's the funny fandom site, don't make yourself miserable, curate your space so that it sparks joy.
This is more site function than etiquette but. Tumblr live is a really recent addition to the site, it's stupid, might be a data harvesting scheme, and everyone hates it. No one uses it. There's a place in settings you can turn it off for a week at a time. Everyone does that every week it's a collective in joke basically.
Anyways mostly my point is have fun, curate and organize your space as you see fit, and watch other people to pick up on site etiquette. If anyone else wants to leave tips on this post it's totally welcome. Good luck out there dude o7
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todayimgonnaplay · 11 months ago
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Today I'm Gonna Play: Mafia II (Original version)
Almost a decade ago I had a period where I was addicted to Grand Theft Auto's formula for some reason. I played IV but didn't have the proper specs to play V, so I looked for similar games. The Mafia series came up and 2 was the latest at the time, so I got it. It definitely fit the bill although at some point I ended up rage quitting early on. This time I've decided to revisit and finish it.
Because this series gets compared to GTA a lot, I had the impression that this would be GTA-levels of open world. In a way, it is. You can drive around, buy clothes, eat at places etc. But the game is divided into chapters because it places story first. There's not much to explore in the city as it is to just get from one place to another. It's not really a bad thing, as other games have done something similar such as No More Heroes (Although I think that game implemented it in a strange way and wouldn't be worse off if it removed the open world). I wouldn't say that the world is boring either for the most part, the first half of the game really sets a nice ambience despite being set in the 40s during World War II. Driving in the freezing cold with the radio on made me feel a type of nostalgia for a time I never lived in. I love it when games do that. The second half shows a revitilization of the States post-war, with the country going through advancements and a time of peace, which is pretty great too.
The gameplay has a bit of variety going on, unlike GTA's usual methods of ''go to location > shoot people > go to location". Although this is present here, there are a number of stealth segments that condemn violence, mundane tasks that regular people would realistically do, and escorts (which is also present in GTA). It's nice to see this kind of formula be done in a different way. Do I prefer it over GTA? I can't say. Maybe with the right budget and polish this could be more interesting. I don't consume a lot of gangster or mafia media, nor do I know too much about their culture and history, so I don't have any suggestions or improvements, other than wondering if there is a game or series that really tries to be accurate and takes upon the opinions of people that actually live the lifestyle, like the Yakuza series for example.
The story is alright. It's a bit more serious and cast is somewhat interesting, mostly the protagonist Vito and his friend Joe. They really remind me of Niko and Roman from GTA IV. War veterans that end up in the US and are helped by someone close who's a bit of a goof, except Joe is way more likely to stand up for himself and make a good living. It even follows the structure of starting from the bottom and climbing the ladder to the top, which I think is the standard formula for this type of story. If I recall correctly, Scarface and The Godfather also have a similar structure.
As for cons, the controls feel quite clunky in the two most important aspects of the core gameplay: Shooting, and driving. Shooting is a lot better if you use keyboard and mouse, but it's not great on controller. I prefer to play most games on controller these days for better sitting posture and playing too close to the screen. But driving is quite bad in both modes. It seems like open-world games have a hard time figuring out the handling part of driving a vehicle. It's like I'm slipping on soap every time I turn. It doesn't help that I end up accidentally bumping into a car which puts me on a chase if the police is nearby. Other culprits that had this issue were games like Watch_Dogs and Cyberpunk. GTA on the other hand is a hit or miss but has managed to grapple with it fairly with IV and V. Games should really prioritize handling if driving is a major aspect of transportation, otherwise it's a huge frustration.
Additionally, sprinting is a nightmare. Not due to poor controls but rather the camera itself which shakes a lot when you run. I'm not sure if this mechanic has been playtested much but even as someone that doesn't really get motion sickness (I can play the Mirror's Edge games without the reticle) but this made me feel woozy every time I used it. There's no way to turn it off, and unfortunately nobody has made a mod of it either. So my only choices was to just look at the minimap or away from the screen to get to where I want to go.
Another frustrating aspect is that the game has no autosave or even manual save. Rather, it has sparse checkpoint saves that are at least guaranteed to occur after a finished chapter. This is frustrating if I have other commitments I need to get to in real life but cannot drop the game, but luckily I've strategized my time well, plus the game's chapters are typically short too. But I still don't like the idea of not having frequent saves, or at least checkpoint saves.
Some of the dialogue is also a bit iffy, although this is wholly subjective. A number of what's depicted and said towards minorities would not be tolerated today. There are a few instances where a game may use hateful language to depict a historical time, such as Red Dead Redemption 2, and this may be the case here too since it's set in an older time period. But I think it was done a bit excessively, as it gave me the impression that the game really liked to make use of slurs a lot, especially towards one ethnic group due to their presence in the story. RDR 2 on the other hand, did use slurs too but it was done sparingly, and also had a number of characters highly discourage hateful behaviour just to be safe. As much as telling an authentic story is important, video games are more interactive as a medium and can therefore be more influential (especially with how people can be online), so it is something to be a little careful of. I also noticed that the collectibles, which involved nude magazine pictures were more for satisfying typically masculine desires. But regardless, I understand that this game was made in a different time, and it's interesting to see fictional media do different takes on social issues which may conflict with my values from time to time. The developers also seem to acknowledge this as a warning message is apparently displayed in the Definitive Edition.
Overall, this game is nice to go through for those interested in gangs in fiction, or want a shorter and more story focused version of GTA. The frustrating gameplay make me hesitant to try any other entry of the series, but maybe I might change my mind in the future.
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princesscolumbia · 1 year ago
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So it's been long enough and I'm expecting to come back to it, but my oldest popular fanfic, Fission, is now up on AO3. If you're not aware, I started penning this work back in 2006 as Ranma 1/2 was starting to lose relevance in anime pop culture. Inu Yasha was taking its place as young women were becoming an anime watching demographic in the USA and, as gender-fluid (literally) as Ranma's core audience is, "Dog-demon-boy hearts girl" had greater appeal to the wider young women demographic than "boy-who-understands-how-important-an-emergency-tampon-is hearts girl".
It also was released in the age of After Fuku Fic (AFF). During the Fuku fic era, there was clone after clone after clone of the core idea of "what if Ranma were to become a senshi?" Every member of the Ranma cast got shoved into a seifuku, it seemed, and any characters on either the Sailor Moon or Ranma parts of the equation that didn't fit just so were often discarded. This isn't to say the sub-sub-sub-genre is bad (I'm writing for it, so clearly I don't think so) but people just got tired of it.
And I dropped Fission in the middle of that and found myself in the rare company of people who wrote a fuku fic that even people who'd been completely burned out on the idea still wanted to read it.
Life happened, and I wound up reading (and writing) MLP-centric fics, then She-ra, and lately dabbling in The Locked Tomb. And yet I still keep drifting back to this oldy but goodie because I've just got so many stories in that sandbox I want to tell.
So without further ado, I present to you...
Fission
A Ranma 1/2 & Sailor Moon fanfic
by Princess Celestia
Ranma is having A Day. The usual wacky relationship hijinks wind up with him tripping while running from his self-declared love interests (it has to do with martial arts, several foreign laws, and an okonomiyaki cart...long story) and falling off a roof (...again, long story) to pass through a stream of water from a broken pipe, triggering the magic that cursed him to turn into a girl with a splash of cold water. But today the wacky cranked right up into the weird when he DIDN'T collide with the other person who also happens to be standing in the spray of water. Usagi is having a pleasant day, actually. She's spending time with her boyfriend, taking in parts of Tokyo she doesn't normally get to, and in all enjoying herself when she gets a call about a monster attack. She ducks into an alley and starts to transform into Sailor Moon when a pipe bursts and sprays her with water right as someone...doesn't collide with her falling from the roof above. The destiny of both Ranma and Usagi has been altered by a random accident that nobody could have planned for or anticipated. Nobody around them is even remotely prepared.
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Konatsu pulled his wooden sword and bounced a few more paces away from the youma, "Where are you going, Ranma-sama?"
Ranma was already pelting out of the room, "To get body armor!" he snapped back.
He darted into the next room and leapt into the pool. Body armor, body armor, body armor... ran through his head as he felt the water cover his form. He felt, for the first time, a surge of magic accompanying his transformation, then for no reason that she could at first figure out suddenly shouted out under water, "MOON... AQUA... POWER... ACTIVATE!"
Konatsu had backed far enough away from the monster while goading it onward that he was able to see what Ranma was doing in the next room. Suddenly, both he and the monster recoiled as water blasted from the pool, light and sound sweeping the room.
Ranma was caught up in a strange transformation like she had never experienced before. She somehow knew it was distinct from her usual Jesenkyo curse. She felt her clothes dissolve into magical mist, then felt ribbons brushing her form. She felt the fingerless gloves, the panties and bra, the fuku, the boots, everything form up on her body. She was even more intently aware of something even stranger going on just in front of her chest. She felt magic streaming out of her, but somehow leaving her even more replenished than if she had just taken a nap. Whatever was going on, it was additive, not subtractive. Two distinct colors flowed from her, one white, the other black. It began swirling together, forming the yin/yang symbol that was familiar to any martial artist, but most especially to her thanks to it's unique meaning for her life. It suddenly hardened into what looked like a crystal, then attached itself to her uniform at the join where her sailor sash met just below her neckline.
This all took place in under three seconds and was completely unseen by Konatsu or the monster thanks to the light show. What Konatsu did see was that, launching up from the explosion of water, light, and sound, was Ranma-sama, but not as the ninja had ever seen her before. He gasped in ecstatic surprise, tinged with a hint of girlish jealousy, "Sailor..."
"MOON..." shouted out an enraged Ranma, "CHESTNUT..." her boots slammed down in front of the youma, "STRIKE!" Ranma-ne-Moon's arms became a magically enhanced blur as she began raining blow after blow against the youma. Incredibly, the youma was blocking or deflecting the punches. Sailor Moon bounced away, and the monster lashed out with an unnaturally long reach against both martial artists.
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To catch the whole thing before I write the next chapter, check it out on Archive of Our Own.
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beatrice-otter · 8 months ago
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I think you got that right, but also, those are only a tiny fraction of the things that might affect your understanding of other people.
Race will affect things. Even if you think you are a completely non-racist person, you have grown up in a racist society, and it has shaped your gut reactions. They have tested this. The vast majority of white people react differently to Black people than to other white people, usually without realizing this. We're more likely to be suspicious, we're more likely to assume bad intentions, given the exact same words and actions. And we won't even realize we're doing this.
Culture will affect things. Most people grow up with a sense of what is normal that is deeply shaped by your culture. And not just the big things, this also affects little things like "how much eye contact is polite." If you are talking with someone who grew up in a different culture--and growing up in a different region of your home country can be enough even if everything else is the same, think of the city vs. country debate on who's polite and who is rude--your gut is going to steer you wrong. You will not consciously notice a lot of the body language details, but either they will mislead you or they'll just feel weird to you, and your brain is programmed to interpret "different" as "wrong." And then your hindbrain will come up with justifications for why they're wrong/bad: they're lying, they're untrustworthy, they're dangerous, etc.
Neurotype will affect things. People with neurodivergences of various kinds will often have nonstandard kinesics. Their body language, facial expression, and tone of voice will not fit with the cultural expectations around them. And, again, people will not notice all the specifics, just that this person is different, and the brain is programmed to interpret "different" as "wrong." And then your hindbrain will come up with justifications for why they're wrong/bad: they're lying, they're untrustworthy, they're dangerous, etc.
And also, the people who are the most likely to lie are the people who are really good at it! The people who can lie to your face and come off as the most sincere people in the world. The people who like to manipulate and con other people! Your gut will lead you wrong in a different way with these people; you will feel good about them, and thus you will be likely to interpret their words and actions in the best possible way (even when they're actually really awful).
That's not even starting on how your own perspective is guaranteed to be biased. Even if you have no trauma and are only dealing with people of the same background as yourself whom you like, you know your own thoughts and experiences in much deeper detail than you can possibly know someone else's. You will interpret your own behavior knowing all the justifications and reasons for everything ... and you don't have those for other people. This is doubly true when you're dealing with people you don't like. You will be less inclined to take a charitable interpretation of their words/actions, and more likely to assume the worst.
They've done a lot of research on this, in the field of communications. Turns out, people's ability to correctly interpret the motivations of other people is about 50-50. On average, people get it right about 50% of the time.
And there are people who are much better at interpreting others! There are people who get it right about 75% of the time! The problem with this is that 75% right is still 25% wrong ... and the people who are 75% right are usually convinced of their own skills to such a degree that they don't believe they could be wrong. "I'm really good at this, much better than other people are, so therefore, I'm always right, and I should always trust my own abilities more than I trust anything else including any explanations other people give for their own thoughts and words and actions."
So always remember that your own interpretations of other people are, statistically, only right about half the time. Even if you are an amazing profiler who is way better at "reading" people than most are, you are still going to be wrong at least 1/4 of the time.
Things that work in fiction but not real life
torture getting reliable information out of people
knocking someone out to harmlessly incapacitate them for like an hour
jumping into water from staggering heights and surviving the fall completely intact
calling the police to deescalate a situation
rafting your way off a desert island
correctly profiling total strangers based on vibes
effectively operating every computer by typing and nothing else
ripping an IV out of your arm without consequences
heterosexual cowboy
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mannatea · 1 month ago
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Waiting for the Rain, a Fire Emblem 7 fanfic
Words: 1,083 words Summary: On their journey back to Sacae, Lyn asks Kent a question that helps them both come to an understanding. Pairing/Character: Kent/Lyn Extra Info: This was originally written for @arthoure from the prompt "Kent and Lyn's journey back to Sacae. Slice of life." It was first posted on February 19, 2012 and was 545 words long. Rating: T Genre: Romance, angst, courtly love undertones.
Thank you to @trash-god for the beta work. 💚
WOW, okay, note time! Read these after the story, please.
Boy do I have notes. First of all, the original story isn't really recognizable now.
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You Heard It Here First, Folks!
It's not that I think the original was bad; my notes on it pretty clearly state that I thought it would need some work but had a good concept going for it. Anyway, when I'm doing these rewrites I'm mostly thinking of how I might approach the story if I was writing it now (versus how it was actually written).
When I did that for this story, I came away from the original with a couple of really good ideas—mostly surrounding two points that were brought up in the original comments on this story.
Kent's fear that loneliness would keep them together even if things got bad, and
The idea that Kent might be aware that propriety and titles might get in the way of him being a good partner for Lyn.
In the original the first point was made well enough, but the second stated that he was afraid of not being good enough to be [more than a lover]. I discarded that idea because, I feel like in the more courtly-love-esque background I gave them, here, they almost start out as more than lovers already.
Anyway, the new themes for this story based on those two points came to me so quickly it even surprised me. I feel like people don't really give Kent much credit as a character. Everyone thinks he's boring and has little to recommend him, but I like to imagine him as if he could be a person, because anything less would honestly just make me a shit-tier writer. <3 Also, he's an extremely successful person at a young age, and notably disciplined/hard-working, yet dedicates himself wholly to Lyn in his supports with her...and leaves literally everything he's ever known to be with her.
When I wrote this story originally I had never done such a thing myself, and in fact I would not do that very thing until almost four years later. (Most of you reading this probably know this already, but it's not easy to leave everything you know for a new place—and in Kent's case, a completely new culture, too. All out of love!)
I dunno, man. I think a character like that has a few interesting components worth exploring!
In light of these two points being brought to the forefront of the story, I had to craft a situation where they felt like bigger issues than everything else that comes with "leaving everything you've ever known for the unknown." While all of my ideas didn't make it into the story (there just wasn't room to include everything without bogging it down and making it boring), I did try to fit in a few hints. I really wanted to highlight that these fears are reasonable things for someone like Kent to struggle with, particularly propriety acting as a legitimate potential roadblock, rather than the usual KentLyn fare of "teehee it's funny if he can't remember to call her only by her name" or "it's hot if he calls her Lady Lyndis when they're intimate."
And I mean, don't get me wrong. The former can be funny in some circumstances and the latter can definitely be hot (teehee), but in a story like this I wanted to try something that sits outside of that realm and rests more in angst: "they're both tired of propriety but have been beholden to it for so long it's hard to remember it doesn't govern them anymore." And Kent struggles especially with it.
The backstory, for those curious, is more or less that, rather than die quickly, Marquess Hausen took a downward turn and not only lost some of his physical health, but also his mental faculties. Basically, he suffered from dementia. I really wanted to include this in the story to some degree (by having him recognize Lyn as Madelyn, completely forgetting who Lyn actually is & also failing to recognize his loyal retainers of the last few years), but I just couldn't fit it in clearly without it sounding clumsy.
Anyway, Hausen's unstable mental health also spells trouble for Kent and Lyn's (quiet, somewhat courtly love) relationship because mentally he's backsliding into seeing Lyn as Madelyn and sometimes he still imagines she's in love with someone he doesn't approve of (because he is remembering Hassar). Due to the fact that he oftentimes doesn't recognize Kent anymore, the price of getting caught doing anything together kind of skyrockets; they can't really predict how he might react, but they can guess that it will be bad due to how poorly he is doing.
Thus, they have this mostly courtly love romance going on, where they try to find moments to at least have something more for themselves. And this goes on. For several years.
So by the time they get out of this situation, they're both rather beaten down by it, but he struggles to really put himself in a mindset where it feels natural to just hold her outside of specific intimate periods (which is a nice way of me saying they definitely had sex before this story takes place, but as you can imagine, this doesn't fix the issue for him).
I don't actually think this is that big of a deal to Lyn (though if it went on too long it would make her despair), but from Kent's perspective: he literally gave up everything but Lyn to be here. SHE IS ALL HE HAS. He wants this to work. And he loves her so much that all the factors that are out of his control or that he can't know make him anxious. He doesn't want to disappoint her. He doesn't want to fail her. And he's afraid that his own habits—born more or less of survival when they had to be careful—will start causing her to resent him.
Like he thinks she shouldn't have to remind him. It's a small thing. He knows it is. He understands that now. He should just do it; he shouldn't have to think about it or be told. And he's like, ashamed that he's not immediately able to shed those literal years of what was essentially trauma.
Truthfully, he should think about it like he's breaking one habit and forming a new one; he just needs more time is all. But he also needs to feel comfortable taking that time (which is how this gets resolved—not with him explicitly saying, "I'm afraid you're going to resent me because I'm struggling with this thing I don't even want to struggle with," but with them reaffirming that they are on this path together and that they still love one another).
AND IT IS MY HOPE that even if you hadn't read that part about the backstory I had in mind, you still got the impression that they were being so careful for a reason (especially with Lyn mentioning his integrity; if she's the one pushing him against a wall to kiss him, it makes it much harder to place blame on Kent) and now that they are finally out of that situation he's just not adapting as quickly to this "new normal" as he wants and he struggles with this.
ANYWAY...
The original version of this story was pretty bare-bones "This is your last chance to change your mind" kind of a story, and while that wasn't a bad approach, I felt like skewing this one a little more toward that original "slice of life" prompt where it feels like there's a story going on and a history that we're not fully privy to. This is a handful of moments in time for these characters where they tackle their fears and communicate a little and come out the other side a bit better for it.
Oh, and angst. The original was marked as "angst/romance" as well, but I felt like I should lean into it a bit more, here, because both of these characters are pretty vulnerable right now.
In the original Lyn just kind of asks him if he's okay out of nowhere, but I wanted it to feel like she had a reason to ask it, here—especially after everything they've been through. Kent's hesitation and the way he doesn't answer her question ("For what?") tell her he's struggling, and this digs at her own insecurities (which we do understand a little, through Kent's eyes).
Anyway, it wasn't my intention to over-explain this story to anyone. I'm just really excited that I deviated so far from the original while still managing to write what I hope is a much more solid story.
Tiny bits of the original remain, but so much of this is new, and I think the biggest change I made was not just in the backstory I crafted to build this story from, but also in the echo of their supports, in him realizing that even though he's been showing her his heart hasn't changed through all those difficult years that they waited for one another, that now that they're free of the castle and he's only beholden to her—that she probably needs to hear it from him, too. Not just that this is what he wants, but that he is here because he loves her.
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If you read this far, I hope you enjoyed the story and the notes! I have zero intention of writing that backstory out as a real story but if a bunch of people express interest, well...you never know. (I'm easily persuaded...what can I say?)
Thanks for reading!
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