#doesn't mean i won't go back to long hair someday. just need to try something different now

[tea-of-destiny]

i cut my hair fairly short earlier (shortest it's ever been) and i thought it looked fine, but then i took a shower and it curled way more than i was expecting, so now it feels dumb. i guess maybe i have to keep chopping tomorrow to get it back to okay.

[woso-dreamzzz]

Copy

Alessia Russo x Child!Reader

Summary: You want to be like your sister

It was obvious to just about everybody that you were the happy little accident of the family. Your brothers and sister were so much older than you, with jobs of their own while you were just starting school.

No one liked to call you a mistake though it was certainly the word that went through everyone's mind when they saw you and Alessia standing next to each other.

It was the word that everyone in the England team was thinking of the moment Alessia showed up to camp with you by her side. You were settled easily on her hip as you aimlessly sucked your thumb, no matter how many times your sister pulled it from your mouth.

It wasn't exactly the plan that you would come with Lessi to camp but Mummy and Daddy had to go away and Luca and Gio were too busy to look after you so Lessi was the last choice.

Lessi's your absolute favourite. Mummy and Daddy say it's mean to have favourites but you don't really care. Gio and Luca can stick together because they're boys and you'll stay with Lessie because you're girls.

You want to be like Lessi when you're older and you want to do everything she does.

You didn't use to see Lessi a lot when she played for United but she plays for Arsenal now so you see her a bit more regularly. Lessi's your biggest idol and she doesn't smell bad like your brothers do so you like to be with her all the time.

"Alright," She says, smoothing down your hair," Do we want laces or velcro?"

You look at the two shoe options she's showing to you. You look between them, biting at your lip as you swing your feet back and forth.

"What're you wearin'?"

"Well, I've got laces."

"I want laces!"

Lessi laughs. "Of course you do." She slips the shoes onto your feet and double knots your laces because you're still a bit too little to do them by yourself. You're learning though because Lessi can tie her laces by herself so you're going to learn too.

Alessia's big and tall as she leads you by the hand down to the gym. You want to be big and tall like Lessi too someday and you lean easily into her side as you walk.

"Well, looks like the smallest member of the squad has arrived." Ella's the one speaking and you wave at her. Ella's Alessia's adult best friend so you need to be nice to her. You're Lessi's proper best friend though because she tells you that all the time but you still have to be nice to Ella because Lessi will get sad if you don't.

So, you smile and wave at Ella as Lessi sets you up at the machine she's about to use. It looks very big and complicated but Alessia knows what she's doing because she loads some weights onto it and starts pulling on a rope thing to lift it up and down.

You circle the machine suspiciously, looking at all angles as Lessi takes big, deep breaths as she pulls, releases and then pulls again.

You kind of want to try and you reach your hand up to grab onto it too.

Alessia smiles fondly at you but removes your hand. "Sorry, tesoro. You can't help me."

You frown at that. "Why?"

"Because I have to do this by myself."

"Why?"

"So I can get stronger."

"I can get stronger like you too!"

Alessia's still smiling at you. "You're only little, tesoro. Maybe when you're older."

You don't like that answer. If you wait too long then maybe Alessia won't like you anymore. You don't want her to not like you.

Your bottom lip wobbles and she sighs.

"Hey," She says," How about this? I left my bottle over there by Mary. It's pretty heavy and I need a strong girl to go and grab it for me."

You turn to look where she's pointing. It's one of those big bottles that holds a gallon or something and it's sitting on the floor by where Mary's working out.

"I'm a strong girl," You say and Lessi laughs.

"I know you are. Can you go and grab it for me?"

You nod. You make to run off to grab it before you backtrack so you can give Lessi a hug and a kiss.

You weave your way through the gym before scaring the socks off Mary when you suddenly just appear and start dragging Lessi's water bottle away with you.

"Jesus," She says, placing a hand on her chest," You need to stop popping up like that. You scared the hell out of me."

"Sorry," You say, straining as you drag the bottle with you.

"Do you need some help?"

"No!" You say quickly, puffing out your chest," I'm a strong girl like Lessi. I can do it myself."

"Alright then," Mary says," Off you go then."

You kind of think this is like what Lessi's doing on the machine. She's pulling on something with weight and now you're pulling on something with weight.

So, technically, you are copying Lessi. You like that. You're too little to use the machine but you're not too little to copy the exercises Lessie does.

She's beaming as you come back, dragging the bottle the whole length of the gym towards her. She rewards you with a kiss on the head and half a chocolate bar.

You get tired pretty quickly when Lessi sends you off to do other things that mimics what she's doing on the machines. You wish you were big enough like Lessi to use them but you think doing these little errands makes up for it.

It gets you very tired though and suddenly you can't copy Lessi anymore. You wish you could but you're very tired out so you just kind of sit down with her as she finally goes through some stretches.

You crawl between her legs and rest you head against her shoulder.

Lessi's hands come up to adjust you so you're settled nicely in her lap as she chatters away to Maya and Ella. She's managed to keep stretching around you and you just let yourself sag against.

"I think someone needs a nap," Maya says pointedly and, even though you're exhausted, you still hear her perfectly.

"No," You grumble to Lessi," No nap."

"I think it would help," Lessi says.

You shake your head. "No. Are you nappin'?"

"No."

"Then I'm not nappin'."

Lessi laughs at that before getting to her feet.

You whine when she pulls away from you, stumbling to crowd into her space again.

"Hey," She says," It's alright. I'm just stretching my legs a little."

"Stretching too," You reply softly even though you're swaying a little bit because you're sleepy.

"Come on." Lessie leans down to pick you up and you go limp in her arms. "How about that nap now?"

You shake your head and take a firm grip of her shirt. "Nap if you nap."

"Well," She says," I guess we can nap together today."

[mochikofi]

Meguru Bachira NSFW alphabet

A - Aftercare (what they're like after sex)

he's obviously clingy. he would hug you like there's no tomorrow and he would murmur phrases about how he loves you so much and how he plans make you and his mom meet because he's certain that you're the love of his life.

B - Body part (their favorite body part of yours and his)

he loves his eyes. he knows that one seductive look from him, you'll melt and get wet easily. he takes it for granted lmao.

he loves your stomach. he loves how it shows the bulge that he created. he also loves laying on your stomach, he thinks it's comfortable.

C - Cum (anything to do with cum)

he loves cumming inside your mouth. he always gets hard when he imagines the look on your face when your giving him a blow while his cum drips on your chin.

D - Dirty Secret (Self explanatory, a secret of theirs)

He's been wanting to have a threesome with you and Isagi for months, but he doesn't know how to bring it up because you might get uncomfortable or get weirded out by that idea.

E- Experience (How experienced are they?)

He's not that experienced but he did watch some porn so he knows the things that he needs to do in order to pleasure you and him. (He couldn't find the clit).

F - Favorite Position

Any position as long as he can see your pretty faced fucked because of him. He feels proud because he manages to make your face look like that, so fucked and pleasured because of him.

G- Goofy (Are they goofy or serious in bed)

Bachira is always goofy in bed, heck he will even mess up on purpose just to make you distracted from the pain. But he turns serious when he's jealous or when you're being bratty, that's where he will put you in your place back.

H - Hair (How groomed are they)

He's not that groomed but if you asked to shave it and leave nothing, then he will do it so he won't make you uncomfortable.

I - Intimacy (How are they during it)

He's such a tease, he will always make you beg because he likes seeing that side of yours since you don't show your begging side always. So he found a way to see you begging always.

J - Jack off (do they masturbate)

He always masturbates when you're not home. Even when you tell him that you're almost home, heck he cannot resist it and just straights up masturbates to your panties and makes you wear them after.

K - Kinks (One or more of their kinks)

Hair pulling, he likes pulling your hair so he can see your face. and when you're both in doggy style, he always pull just for fun.

L - Location (favorite place to do it)

Bed room or the bathroom. Sometimes when you're asleep, he always put his dick inside of you so he can fall asleep faster, he said. And when you're showering, he just straights up pin you to the wall and fuck you right and there. And ofc he cleans you up after destroying you and your pretty pussy.

M - Motivation (What turns him on)

His fantasy of seeing you full of his cum. He wants to do it someday but he can't because you forbid him to do so, but you did promise him that you will allow him if he's a good boy for about 5 months (he can't last that long)

N - No (Something he wouldn't do)

Doing the things that you don't like. I mean yeah he's in for everything but if you don't like it then he won't do it, he wouldn't want to make you uncomfortable.

O - Oral (Preference in giving or receiving)

He prefers giving sooooo much, he's addicted to your taste. Yeah sure receiving is fun but tasting you is more fun, plus he gets to see you squirm around trying to escape him (you can't)

P - Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual?)

He's always fast tbh, I don't see him going slow on you. He says that you deserve it because your pussy always drives him crazy.

Q - Quickie (Their opinions on quickie)

He thinks it's fun, going to the bathroom looking normal then going outside of he bathroom looking so fucked and having cum dripping on your thighs. He always do it when you're having dinner with your parents, thankfully they don't notice. Or did they?

R - Risks (do they take risks?)

Very much so, he even go as far as fucking you in his parent's bed! He thinks it's fun being thrilled and horny at the same time.

S - Stamina (How long can they go?)

This dude have a high stamina, so expect 6-8 rounds everyday. You're lucky if he's tired, then you'll get 5-6 rounds but that doesn't happen lmao.

T - Toy (do they use toys?)

Yes he does but only one, which is a vibrator. He uses it sometimes when you've been bratty, putting the vibrator in your ass while he fucks your pussy. and of course he's not making you cum.

U - Unfair (how much they like to tease)

As I said, he always teases you. He can tease you in front of his friends if he's feeling bored, turning the vibrator at max mode which leaves you trembling.

V - Volume (how loud are they)

Oh he's pretty loud, louder than you in fact. But sometimes he keeps quiet so he can hear your moans.

W - Wild Card

He knows the things that you've been fantasizing about, that's why he always know what he will do to you.

X - X-Ray (how long are they?)

Hmmmm let's say 6-7. But even with that he can still make you unable to walk for days.

Y - Yearning (How much is their sex drive)

High but controllable, but sometimes he can't resist and just brings you to the bathroom and ruins you.

Z - Zzzz (How quickly they fall asleep)

Super quick, he'll leave you awake with the sticky feeling with him lmao. but he cleans up after he wakes up.

navigation. - NSFW alphabet.

[murdrdocs]

ethan is such a shy boy but once he gets to know u he is all up in ur BIZZZ. like clinging on u every second and playing with ur hair (DONT GET ME STARTED ON HIS CUDDLING PROBLEMS)

ugh he always looks like he wants to know you and be in your inner circle, but those looks come in the form of downcast eyes most of the time, sometimes sandwiched by nervous glances. and he's physically distant at first. when you go out with everyone he's always 3 people over, standing on the outside if you all end up in a huddle, looking like a wounded puppy who isn't in the in-group.

but you're sweet about it, sending him welcoming smiles. trying to visually show him that you won't bite and he can come closer.

"what's up with your roommate?" you find yourself asking chad one night.

"uh..." chad shifts on the couch, crossing his arms over his chest and looking over his shoulder at ethan who stands against the wall in the carpenter-bailey apartment. "so much. i need specifics."

you snort, taking the final sip from your beer and placing it on the ground. "i mean, why does he avoid me like i have covid or something?"

"ohhh, that." chad grins, looking back at you with teasing eyes. "cause he likes you."

oh.

that makes so much sense.

after some time (a very long period of time) it's like you and ethan are inseparable, so much so that chad sometimes regrets telling you about ethan's crush.

you have your legs in his lap most of the time, if you're not sitting in it yourself. your hands are always intertwined, and he's playing with your rings that he's bought you while you play with the bracelets you bought him. he's playing with your hair, scratching your scalp, twirling it around his thick fingers, asking if he can wash it someday. anytime you're both sitting on the same surface, he's figuring out a way you can cuddle. even if you're just temporarily sitting on a kitchen table or a countertop.

he's all around so super-duper attached to you that he just feels lost without you. he doesn't know where to put his hands if they aren't on you, which leaves him fidgeting so much that he's either seeking you out, or texting you in order to busy himself.

[fastcardotmp3]

Chrissy doesn't get a job the summer before senior year like a lot of her friends.

She wants to, somewhere deep inside of her that itches for independence, but when she had mentioned picking up applications at the new mall, her mother had gotten that look on her face. The one where she asks without actually asking-- why would you do that, Christine?

So Chrissy doesn't get a job at the mall, but she also needs some way to fill her days, to break up the monotony, to have a good reason to get out of her own house and out from under her mother's knowing eyes.

She volunteers at the hospital.

A candy striper, with the little striped outfit and all, which she's pretty sure isn't a thing in the city anymore but Hawkins is all about traditionalism so Chrissy doesn't even get to wear pants here. It would be nice, to have an excuse, just like it's nice to have an excuse to leave the house, but you win some you lose some.

Chrissy likes most of the patients, and most of the patients like her. She's always been good with adults, good with the charming and the sweet and the pretty little thing just let me look at you, so it's a decent gig, really.

The women in the maternity ward like to smile big at Chrissy and say this will be you someday, sweetheart like it's something to be excited about rather than something that sends a shock of dread down her spine, sure, but Chrissy likes the babies she doesn't have to touch and she likes the cardiac ward.

The older patients have the best stories, and they're always so eager to have someone willing to just sit and listen and nod and laugh at the right moments, which is good for Chrissy because she likes doing those things.

She's a good listener, a good observer who picks up the choreography at cheer practice faster than the rest and who remembers every backhanded, jealous compliment she's ever gotten. She holds these stories close too, knows that some of these people don't have families around to carry their stories onwards for them.

Chrissy can be that. She can offer that comfort that so long as she's around their lives won't be forgotten.

Sometimes as she's walking the halls at night, putting off going home for just a little while longer with the pink and white stripes swishing around her knees and her ponytail swaying behind her, she thinks maybe she could be a good nurse one day.

She could take care of people. She would work long hours and would sometimes be able to say sorry I won't be home for dinner, Jason, I have a shift. Both of these are pros.

Sometimes, when she's walking the halls at night, putting off going home, she spaces out into that almost-happy reality and loses track of where she's going.

Ends up on a floor she didn't mean to be on.

Stops in her tracks just before the crossing of two halls and looks up confused at the lights-- half gone dark, and then two-thirds, and then flashing.

Strobing really, with a ferocity that has her instinctively taking a stumbling step back the way she'd come, because this floor doesn't have many patients on it, she doesn't think, but someone should fix that. Someone should-- Well, it's just kind of unsettling, so someone should--

Chrissy's train of thought is cut off by noise. Noise. Noise is the only way her brain knows how to categorize it, this screeching thing, this crashing and loud moving closer as she really starts moving backwards now because-- She doesn't know what she's supposed to do if-- If someone is trying to hurt the patients? But she should try to help, right, she should try--

The first thing Chrissy notices when a body comes careening around the corner in a frantic flail of limbs and a pretty purple dress is just that-- it's a very pretty dress on a very pretty girl, but she's disheveled in ways pretty girls ought not be. Sweaty and panting and hair frizzed out in every direction, it's the first thing Chrissy notices.

The second thing is the horror in her eyes. The third is the noise, drowned out only by the sharp demand to--

"RUN--"

--before Chrissy's hand is being gripped by another and she's being dragged down the hall just as something-- something-- rounds the corner into this strobing funhouse of a corridor.

"What-- What is that?!"

Chrissy has questions, Chrissy has a lot of them, but in this moment, this series of moments, all she can do is trust in the hand dragging hers around, trust in this girl who seems to have the answers even if she's not sharing them through the running and fighting and witnessing as a monster made of flesh melts under doorways and through vents.

Chrissy has questions, but by the time they make it out and she's surrounded by new people, her candy striper dress blood-stained and torn, she mostly has to catch her breath.

Because Nancy Wheeler is holding her by the shoulders and telling her you're safe, I'm sorry, we're gonna figure this out, despite the fact that Chrissy doesn't need to be comforted right now.

She really doesn't feel like she needs to be comforted. She's maybe a little crazy, a little manic, a little caught up in being a disheveled pretty girl right alongside Nancy Wheeler, but she doesn't need comfort for those things.

Not when she looks into those imploring eyes, rimmed black in melting eyeliner, and feels the most alive she ever has.

Chrissy Cunningham laughs so hard outside the hospital on the other side of almost-death that she has to sink to her knees on the asphalt.

Monsters are real and Chrissy got to hold a pretty, messy girl's hand.

Her fantasy of being a halfway-happy nurse when she grows up fades into some sort of oblivion.

[thewritersaddictions]

Prompts List

Pick from this list of many prompts. To send in requests just click 🦝 Give me a number and a few details. Let's have fun with this prompts list!

"Your hair is so soft..."

"It's too cold! Come back!"

"No, I'm not letting you go. It's too early to get out of bed"

"C'mere, you can sit in my lap until I'm done working."

"I'm not going to stop poking you until you give me some attention

"Shh, you're safe. I won't let you go."

"What? Does that feel good?"

"Just pretend to be my date."

"He/she did it." "No he/she did."

"I think I'm in love with you and I'm terrified."

"It's not a double date. We're just third and fourth wheeling."

"No no - it's alright, come here."

"I'm not going to leave you. You're never going to have to suffer by yourself again, I promise."

"Look, I know we don't know each other that well, but I'm still worried about you. No one deserves to be alone."

"If I could, I would kiss away all of your scars."

"I think I might be falling in love with you."

"Your lips are so soft. I could kiss them all day."

"It's not bad to cry. In fact, I think it makes a person stronger."

"Mmm... you're warm."

"You're so cute when you're half asleep like this.."

"I've had a rough day and honestly all I want right now is a drink and someone to cuddle with..."

"No, you can't get up! You're my prisoner for today."

"Shh, it was just a bad dream. Just a dream okay? None of it was real."

"You know I'm/we're always here for you, right?"

"Please talk to me about it."

"You have something in your hair... um-do you want me to get it out?"

"I remember practicing how to ask you out in the mirror.."

"I would've had breakfast ready, but you were sleeping on my arm and I didn't want to wake you."

"I know I've kissed you like, ten times, but just like another ten, please."

"Are you wearing my shirt?"

"Wanna, like- I mean, it you're not busy... we could get lunch? Or even just coffee if you don't have a lot of time?"

"So I was driving past a pet store and couldn't help but wonder how cute an animal would be like in our home."

"Let's just stay in bed."

"We live together. You can't blame this on anyone else."

"You're beautiful, you know that?"

"Shooting star. Make a wish."

"It's beautiful, isn't it?"

"Wow, you're hot."

"I want to marry you."

"I want to take a shower so you should probably join me. It'll save water."

"You're just not the same anymore.."

"It's midnight! Where the hell were you?"

"What the hell is your problem?"

"Why do you run away from your problem all the time?"

"You can't keep it all inside, you know?" Bottling it up won't do any good."

"Hey, I know you're hurting.. but, you're not alone, okay?"

"I hate you! I'm sorry it took me so damn long to realize that."

"You lost your chance."

"I'm sorry if I gave you the wrong impression."

You can'y just lose your temper like this every time you get a bit upset."

"calm down! You're scaring me!"

"Don't look at me like that."

"Were you ever going to tell me?"

"I'm done trying to help you!"

"Sorry doesn't fix anything."

"You didn't call. You didn't text. Nothing."

"It isn't up for debate."

"I don't know what's wrong, okay? I'm just… really tired."

"I'm fine. Stop asking."

"I'm not leaving until you tell me what's wrong, and don't try lying to me."

"I hope someday you get a taste of your own medicine."

"Pack your shit and go. Get the fuck out of my sight!"

"Is this how little you think of me."

"I can't do this anymore… not with you."

"Are you happy now? Huh? DOES THIS MAKE YOU HAPPY?!"

"You said you'd always be ther efor me… so how did this happened? Why weren't you there?"

"Did it ever occur to you that you're hurting me too?"

"I don't need help! I just want the pain to stop!"

"We can be friends instead."

"I tried to move on, but nobody is you."

"Do I look like I've moved on

"I don't remember a fight or a rason, so what happned? Why did we break up?"

"Can I at least buy you a coffee? For old times sake."

"I can't take the loneliness anymore."

"I feel like everyone just forgot I exist."

"What are you talking about? You're married."

"Maybe I'm meant to be alone…"

"I gave you your chance, and you just used it to stab me in the back."

"I've been alone for so long…"

"But you promised."

"Isn't this, like illegal?" "Probably."

"You're really drunk right now. I don't think you're gonna remember any of this." "No, i'm not drunk at all. You're just blurry."

"I have a feeling we should kiss." "Is that a good feeling or a bad feeling?"

"yeah, well, I shut everybody out. Don't take it personally. It's just easier. "

"You're jealous, aren't you?" "I'm not jealous."

"Were you ever going to tell me?"

"I can't beliece you dragged me into this."

" Bite me." "Eat me" "Kiss my ass."

"You think I'm dumb enough to fall for that stupid move."

"You have to tell me why were committing a felony before we do it. Not that that's going to stop us, but at least I'll have all the facts. "

"You weren't supposed to laugh! I'm so embrassed."

"I vote today is a pajama day."

"You aren't supposed to laugh! I'm embarrassed."

"It's a real shame nodody asked for your opinion."

"There's been some real friction in our friend group lately. I sugget an orgy to save out friendship."

"I saw that, You just checked me out."

"Are you stupid or stupid?"

Posted on: 01/21/23

[violetsareblue-selfships]

Promise

Ship: Scaramouche x April | Word Count 1042 | Warnings/Tags: Death mention (like the concept - related to her being mortal).

A/N: Haha, get used to Scara being the main star of the fics I post for a bit since I've written a lot of him in the last month. I'll try to space it out some but he's all I've been writing *shrugs*. Hope you all enjoy! This is the fic that explains just why he's so sure she'll never betray him <3

A choked whimper splits the silence as Scaramouche shoots up in bed. The air feels suffocating, thick and hard to drag in a proper breath. The only small mercy is that he doesn't exactly need to breathe, but he's grown so used to it for appearance's sake that it feels bizarre to not be able to breathe properly.

His body feels shaky and he realizes with disgust that tears are streaming down his face. He swipes at his eyes angrily but the tears keep coming. His mind won't clear of the past memories his nightmare brought to the surface.

How weak is he to be brought to tears by things so long in the past. He thought he'd buried these feelings so deep within his mind that they'd have no hope of ever surfacing again. But even he is powerless against his subconscious.

A soft sob escapes him and he presses his hands over his mouth, silently cursing the way his body his reacting. He's so lost in his own thoughts, in past memories, that he doesn't realize that he's woken the other in the bed.

Arms wrap around his middle, the warmth of her body chasing away some of the shadows from his mind. Not enough to make him stop crying, but enough to make him realize where he is, or better yet, who he is with.

"Go back to sleep." His voice cracks with the order and April hums softly, pulling him gently up against her.

"I don't think I will." She murmurs. "I think you need me to stay awake."

Scaramouche grumbles softly in response, but he lets her move him until his face is buried in her neck, his body flush up against her. The tears fall faster at the way she sinks a hand into his hair and scratches gently over his scalp, her other hand rubbing soothing circles over his back.

"Now… I probably don't have to guess what that nightmare was about." She muses softly, pressing a kiss to the top of his head. "But am I right in thinking it was about your past?"

Scaramouche sobs again, clutching her tighter. "And that's a yes…" April says, her heart breaking for him. She's never seen him this upset before. Even when he was telling her his past, he did it in a detached way.

"You're alright." She says, placing a few kisses to the top of his head. "You can cry it out. It's alright. You're safe here."

Scaramouche wants to scoff. Like he needs her permission to cry. He's the Balladeer, he never cries.

Yet, the permission feels soothing like a warm blanket has just been placed over him. Maybe it's this sense of safety he feels that has him uttering words he'd never say otherwise. How could a normal mortal reduce him to begging?

"Don't leave me."

"I won't. I'm right here." She says, misunderstanding what he truly means.

"Promise you'll never betray me… Like the others." The words are muffled, spoken into her neck as they are, but April hums as she realizes what he means.

"I promise." April says, continuing to stroke over his back softly. "You will never face a betrayal at my hand. I'll always be by your side."

This time, Scaramouche does scoff. "How can you promise that?" He asks. She's mortal. All mortals have to die someday. Sure, she can keep her promise in the time up until that inevitable end, but even she can't guarantee something like this.

"Because, my heart, I found a way around that pesky little detail." She says, laughing softly at how quickly he pulls his head up to look at her. He looks shocked, primarily, but there's a slight hint of hope that he clearly doesn't want to let himself feel. It's that hope that has her expression softening.

"Yes… I'll show you the source material on it later, so you may see for yourself that I'm not lying to you, but I found a bonding ritual. One that if done between an immortal and a mortal being will share that immortality with the mortal so long as the immortal is alive. There's a few other details to it, but that's the primary function of it."

Scaramouche feels at a loss for words. He'd had no idea such a thing could possibly exist. How did she manage to find it?

It doesn't matter. What matters is that if they did this, she'd be with him forever. Even time couldn't take her away from him.

April smiles softly at the stunned look to his eyes and she shifts one of her hands to cup his face. Her thumb brushes under his eye, brushing away the last remaining tears. "I'd be yours forever, Kuni. I told you, I'm never going to betray you."

"I think I'm starting to believe that." Scaramouche says softly. If she went through the trouble of researching and finding such a ritual, then she clearly wants to be with him. For hundreds or maybe even thousands of years.

"Now… why don't you snuggle close and go back to sleep?" She asks softly. "We'll talk details of when we do that ritual later. But you deserve some peaceful rest, my darling. I hope that being in my arms like this will chase away the rest of your nightmares."

Scaramouche nods slowly and sinks back down to bury his face in the crook of her neck. He almost doesn't think he'll be able to fall asleep with this new revelation, but as he lays there, listening to her heartbeat and the steady inhale and exhale of her breathing, he grows sleepy.

April begins to hum softly, some kind of lullaby that has him drifting closer and closer to dreamland. "I love you, Kuni…" She murmurs in between verses and he is barely awake enough to kiss her neck softly before he falls asleep in her arms.

She continues to hold him for a little while longer until she's certain that he's asleep before shutting her own eyes to do the same. They've still got work to do tomorrow, after all, so she needs to rest as well.

Neither of them has any more nightmares that night, only the sweetest of dreams.

[roleplay-abiogenesis2]

WHAT IS YOUR NAME?: "Cyno."

WHAT IS YOUR REAL NAME?: "Only my mother knows the answer. And the God of Wisdom, of course."

DO YOU KNOW WHY YOU’RE CALLED THAT?: "I never thought of asking. I don't believe in knowing everything at all costs."

ARE YOU SINGLE OR TAKEN?: "I am taken... aback by such a personal question." He pauses. "Do you get the joke?"

WHAT ARE YOUR POWERS AND ABILITIES?: "I'm not the type to boast about my fighting prowess. But I'm as strong as I need to be as General Mahamatra... as well as an Electro Vision Holder, as you can see."

WHAT COLOR ARE YOUR EYES?: "Someone once described them as the color of the burning red sands at dusk. I like it. It sounds very cool."

HAVE YOU EVER DYED YOUR HAIR?: "I have considered it in the past. Now I've come to accept my natural looks and their consequences."

DO YOU HAVE ANY FAMILY MEMBERS?: "I believe I do."

DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS?: "Someplace, sometime, I know I have a cute and loud little shiba named Anpu. I chose his name."

TELL ME ABOUT SOMETHING YOU DON’T LIKE: "I don't really like people who are too smart. They think they can control everything, and constantly venture to the fringes of danger."

DO YOU HAVE ANY HOBBIES OR ACTIVITIES YOU DO IN YOUR SPARE TIME?: "How long do you have? You should consider that before you ask me to talk about Genius Invokation TCG."

HAVE YOU EVER HURT ANYONE BEFORE?: "Of course. There is no need to shy away from the subject."

HAVE YOU EVER… KILLED ANYONE?: "I can admit to it. A General Mahamatra cannot hesitate."

WHAT KIND OF ANIMAL ARE YOU?: "Some people at the Akademiya like to compare the matra to the Sumpter Beasts. My subordinates take offense to it, but I find it a fitting metaphor."

NAME YOUR WORST HABITS: "I am probably not the best judge for that. You should ask someone who knows me well and won't hold back. Try Tighnari."

DO YOU LOOK UP TO ANYONE?: "I am not the tallest in my circle of friends, so I look up to most." A pause. "That was a joke, because of my height. But I do have people I look up to. Ironically, the one I look up to the most is shorter than me. That's hysterical."

GAY, STRAIGHT, OR BISEXUAL?: He just looks confused, like he was just spoken to in a foreign language.

DO YOU GO TO SCHOOL?: "Not anymore. I have graduated a few years ago."

DO YOU EVER WANT TO MARRY AND HAVE KIDS SOMEDAY?: "Of course. That would be ideal."

DO YOU HAVE ANY FANS?: "I always keep one in a drawer of my desk for when it's very hot." His face looks so smug. Come on, laugh already. "... What? It's fanny."

WHAT ARE YOU MOST AFRAID OF?: "Failing those who rely on me. I cannot let them down."

WHAT DO YOU USUALLY WEAR?: "Exactly what you see. I had this uniform custom-made personally. I am very proud of it."

DO YOU LOVE SOMEONE?: "I do. I am a human being."

WHAT CLASS ARE YOU?: He looks confused again. "If you're asking about the Darshan I have studied under, I graduated from Spantamad. But that doesn't grant me any sort of permanent title."

HOW MANY FRIENDS DO YOU HAVE?: "You can have friends where you'd never expect. I prefer to not keep count."

WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON PIE?: "That is probably what eating Paimon would taste like. Because she is Pie-mon, get it?"

FAVORITE DRINK?: "Hmmm.. I don't think I have a favorite. I will drink what is available."

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PLACE?: "By the side of people who make me feel home. Wherever that place may be."

ARE YOU INTERESTED IN SOMEONE?: "Of course. Most people don't like it though. It usually means I'm about to come and get you."

WOULD YOU RATHER SWIM IN THE LAKE OR THE OCEAN?: "... Next question, please."

WHAT’S YOUR ‘TYPE’?: Cyno wordlessly hands over a bingo card.

ANY FETISHES?: "That is for me to know and my lover to find out."

CAMPING, OR INDOORS?: "I consider myself an outdoorsy type, but indoor is fine too."

ARE YOU WAITING FOR THIS INTERVIEW TO BE OVER?: "Not anymore."

Tagged by: @mmriesoftvat (there you have it!)

[confusedshades]

Tim's call to Jason was far more direct.

The grunt when Jason picked up had Tim checking the time reflexively and wincing at the display.

"Sorry Jason, but I need a favour."

"Baby bird, it's too early for us nightcrawlers. Unless this is an emergency call back in a few hours."

"I'm cashing in all my chips. It involves blowing up League bases and confronting Ra's."

"Fine. Gimme half an hour before you come pick me up. How long we going to be out of town for?"

"Thanks Jason. We should be back in a week or two. No longer than that."

"Bring some of your fancy coffee."

Tim smiled as he hung up before turning to look at the three people in his living room.

Right. Explanations for the kids before packing. "Kon, could you grab my go bag? The one in the garage please? And make sure that the med kit from the workbench is ready to go as well." Kon nodded before vanishing. Thank god for teammates who could read you decently.

"You're going to leave?" That was the little boy. The attempt at nonchalance had Tim's heart twisting. It sounded like something he'd said to his own parents when they left with no warning on one of their trips.

Tim crouched in front of both the kids. With them on the couch, and him on the floor they were about the same height. "Just for a bit." Tim explained and watched something cross the girls face before she smoothened it out. Right. That wouldn't do.

"I'm not mad at you two. And I'm really happy you two exist and are alive. I'd really like to get to know you if that's ok. But I do want to go....talk to the man who made you without asking me. Make sure that he doesn't do anything like this again."

"Did you want to be a dad?" Tim looked from one kid to the other, uncertain about how to explain.

"Honestly?" At their twin nods Tim exhaled and swept a hand back through his hair. "I never really thought about it. Maybe someday in the future if I had a... partner then yes. But that doesn't mean that I won't try with you two. The only one at fault here is that..." as Tim trailed off trying to find a child appropriate word for the pit soaked decrepit monster he was startled into laughter by the girl's suggestion.

"Fruitloop?"

"Yes that's a good word as any. I'm hoping that once I get back, you two and I can figure out what we all want and what is best for us together, okay? It doesn't matter whether that's together or separately or sometimes together or whatever. We decide it together. For now I'm going to have my friend Kon stay with you to keep you safe and make sure you two are taken care of. I want you both to be good for him."

"You promise to come back?"

Tim smiled and with an old faded memory tugging at his mind, held out his little fingers for each of the kids. When they only looked confused, he asked, "Do you two know what a pinky promise is?" When they shook their heads, Tim nodded. "Well, for me, a pinky promise is the most solemn promise you can make. You wrap you little fingers like this with the person, and you make your promise. You're not supposed to break it at all when you pinky promise anyone so always be sure when you do make one okay?"

When two tiny chubby pinky fingers wrapped around his two slender scarred and calloused ones, something inside Tim shifted. He didn't want to look at it too closely just yet so he packed away the feeling for later.

"I pinky promise to come back to you both."

Kon was waiting in the garage for him, the two duffle bags at his feet near the bike. "You'd make a good dad, you know."

Tim was wholly unprepared for comment and didn't know what to make of it. So he decided to sidestep the whole thing. "Thanks for staying with them. I know you would prefer coming with me but I need someone I can trust here. Not just for this week but also for after."

Kon snorted and wrapped his arms around Tim. "Just promise to clock him once for me. I'll take care of the munchkins."

"Will do. Thanks for not pushing by the way."

"If I tell you I even packed a thermos of that fancy coffee of yours for Jason, do I get a pinky promise of my own?"

Tim's laugh was a bit shaky, but neither of them mentioned it. "Sure. What would you like me to promise?"

"Take care of yourself? I don't just mean come back with all your organs. I mean your mind and heart too."

Tim buried his face further into Kon's shoulder. His muffled response of "I'll try my best." had Kon's arms tightening the slightest bit. They stood for a minute more, taking and giving comfort and promises before Tim pulled back; no longer Tim but entirely Red Robin, entirely a Bat on a mission.

He rifled through the two bags that Kon must've gathered in a handful of seconds before letting him have his space and time with the kids. Added another pair of boots after some consideration, and then tossed both into the beat up civilian car he used sometimes.

Jason was waiting at the entrance of his building when Tim drove up and grunted his thanks when he took the proffered thermos. Five minutes later, he asked, "What's the plan baby bird?"

"I haven't worked out all the details exactly, but the end result is destroying Ra's and significantly reducing the number of Pits."

Jason whistled at that. "Damn what did that decrepit mummy do to you?" When he noticed Tim's tightened grip on the driving wheel, Jason sat up a bit more. "Tim?"

"Remember when Bruce was missing for a year and I'd gone to look for him? Well, one of the expeditions to find information included getting stabbed through the spleen in Iraq. Woke up at a League base there and discovered that apparently Ra's had decided that the damage was too much and ordered it removed. He apparently kept it. Used the cells from that and.... used the cells to make a pair of twins."

Tim's clinical tone and dry manner as if he were giving a report to Batman told Jason something was amiss. "Mazel Tov. What did you leave out?"

Tim took a deep breath as they turned off the main road towards one of the abandoned hangers where they stored a spare plane one of the could be civilian or vigilante dual purpose variations.

"They're not clones Jason."

Jason sucked his teeth as he considered the ramifications of that tidbit given what he knew of Tim's history, factored in what he knew of Ra's and the League. If the kids weren't clones, meant they were actual kids. Which meant two donors. Shit.

"I got some C4, but I do have to ask, is abandoning that mummy on some uninhabited planet too much?"

"Explaining that to Damian, and to Talia when she comes looking for information wouldn't be worth it."

"Right."

------x------

A week and a half later, they both walked into the Nest, stinking of explosives and smoke. Jason's hulking figure tripped straight into the kitchen while Tim got tackled by two kids. Who immediately withdrew complaining of his stink.

Tim laughed as he looked up, and smiled at Kon. He was exhausted and bruised and wanted to sleep for a week, but Ra's had warned. There were only two Pits left in the world - Jason had gone off with Kori for a couple of days to take care of one in South America and one somewhere in the desert of North East Africa - so either Ra's stuck to Nanda Parbat or came down to Gotham to access the puddle in the catacombs of of the city. Tim was severely tempted to blow up that too but previous experiences with it told him that messing with it would lead to other problems.

Jason's indignant squawk drew Tim's attention to the girl climbing onto Jason's shoulders to perch there. "Did you at least ask for permission before climbing all over your uncle Jay?" Tim's unthinking question had all eyes snapping to him. The kids in delight - because if that was their uncle then that meant Tim would be dad. Kon had been explaining who the people in the pictures all over the walls were the last few days - and the two adults in bemusement.

Kon just snorted and shoved both of them towards the bathrooms further down the hall. "The kids are right. You two still stink of explosives. If you promise to scrub yourselves I'll make something to eat for everyone."

As he and Jason trooped into the rest of the house, Tim knew that he didn't have the first clue about what and how he'd care of the two kids he'd claimed for his own. But he knew he'd have at least Jason and Kon helping him out. Maybe even the rest of the YJ team. Definitely Dick, Damian, Cass and Steph. Duke and Barbara would pitch in as they could manage. Imagining Bruce's face when he was told he was a grandfather though had him laughing.

The next few days had Tim feeling both more stressed and relaxed than he had in years.

Ellie apparently like climbing everything to find the tallest places to perch. Jason had quickly gotten used to it and didn't even bat an eye now when either she or Danny used him like a jungle gym.

Danny had taken to attempting to tinker with electronics - Tim had immediately had to babyproof the workbench otherwise the number of electronics spilling their guts across the top would've been exponentially more. (The heart attack from walking in to find the kid trying to solder the insides of his downstairs coffee maker without proper gear had taken at least a year off his life). Tim was teaching Danny about how to fix broken things, and to adjust things to their preferences.

Ellie had taken Dick's acrobatics to heart and now you could see her doing random cartwheels everywhere.

Bruce's face when Tim had broken the news was his memorialised in his camera reel alongside all the new pictures of the two kids. He'd taken up his photography again and Ellie and Danny seemed to enjoy posing for him anytime they saw him with a camera.

That's not to say there weren't growing pains on both sides. Plenty of times Tim needed to just walk away to cool down instead of digging into things with questions, and the kids had plenty of habits they needed to unlearn - assuming and concluding their own ideas and secrets for example. Lot of things the three of them had to learn together as well - making sure that they communicated with each other, talking out problems before they become big things.

Danny and Ellie take a small, reincarnation, vacation from their duties in the Infinite Realms (King Danny and his most trusted Knight/Princess Ellie). Don't worry, they leave the Realms in good hands (Jazz, Pandora, Frostbite, CW, etc, basicly Danny's main council takes over for a few years)

They both weren't expecting to wake up in an assassin cult though.... Nor to find out they're five year old twins now... Twin, somewhat clones of the leader and this guy Red Robin their 'father' is kinda obsessed with....

Great their 'father' is an insane assassin leader fruitloop and their 'dad' is named after a fast food joint... whose barely out of his teens btw.

Danny al Ghul Danyal, cast a glance as his full blooded and twin sister this time around Helen Ellie al Ghul who rolled her eyes as they listened to their 'father' ramble on and on about their 'dad' and how they were created to be his heir (Danny mostly, though he had plans on Ellie going to be trained to be his body guard by someone named Lady Shiva soon)

Yeah, no. Ellie dealt with one evil fruitloop father who cloned her once before, she's not dealing that again or falling for the 'I created thus I love you but not really' bs. They need to leave, like yesterday.

Hopefully their 'dad' is... okay he doesn't need to be okay with it at first but hopefully comes around to it, okay with the two of them showing up on his doorstep soon.

And you know what, they're gonna bring him a gift.

His spleen. Yeah it'll be good to give that back to him.

Since you know that was how they got clones to begin with... Maybe don't leave your DNA with people that can make clones next time.

[saltyshe]

the crows as cavetown lyrics

(⚠️possible spoilers⚠️)

jesper: “get a load of this train wreck, his hair’s a mess and he doesn’t know who he is yet” -home

inej: “falling down like angels fighting, stars and lightning, hold me tightly. hold me tightly” -hazel

matthias: “waiting for your arms to part, and welcome in my beating heart: badum, badum, badum, badum” -hazel

matthias: “it's U, it's U. oh god, it's U. it's U. if you're awake then i am too, if you're lost then i'll find you, if you're hurt then i’ll fix you, if you go blind i'll describe the view, if you can't feel then i'll hold you, if you fall know i've got you” -it’s U

kaz: “and if you fall down too far and i can't see you through these marks. and your eyes are covered in scars, and my head's filling with tar. don't worry we'll find another way out” -it’s U

wylan: “everyone and everything around me's always changing, everyone except me i'm stayin' the same as if i was nothing” -we’re alive

nina: “i don't really need to sleep much longer, but the longer i sleep, the slower my heart beats. there's fire on my floor telling me to sleep some more, cry a little louder if you know what this means” -we’re alive

inej: “what does it mean when somebody says sorry? is it true regret or just a formality? i've lost far too many days of my life, and I know I won't get sleep tonight. but it's alright, yeah it's alright, yeah it's alright” -trenchh

matthias: “and it's cold but you're warm can we hug till you freeze tonight? can we hug till you freeze tonight?” -trenchh

nina: “and while you sleep in the pouring rain, just know I'll be with you someday. and I'll have a good one 'til then, just like you told me” -16/04/16(jack’s song)

kaz: “god knows I'm trying to get a new perspective. push the boat to face a new direction. if you're happy i can let you be, but please, oh please, be happy because of me” -so much

nina: “my body hurts, it hurts so much. when you're not here, can't feel your touch. my body hurts, it hurts so much, it hurts so much, it hurts so much” -so much

matthias: “i cant really think right now and this place. has too many colors, enough to drive all of us insane. are you dead? sometimes i think i’m dead. 'cause I can feel ghosts and ghouls wrapping my head. but I don't wanna fall asleep just yet” -home

wylan: “i still get a little scared of something new. but i feel a little safer when I'm with you, falling doesn't feel so bad when i know you've fallen this way too” -devil town

jesper: “buddy, you just need to go home. and I think maybe, you just miss your mum” -i miss my mum

kuwei: “i won't even lie, i'm screaming inside all the time. it seems like a breeze, it feels like a dream. but I don't wanna die” -dear

kaz: “gotta stop forgetting the fact it's not just me in this goddamn world” -dear

wylan: “take me home, i want my bed, i want my mum. we have had so much fun, but I want to go home. we will sit on the windowsill and look up at the sky, and the clouds will spell messages for just you and i. we will water the plants for the first time in a while, and i'll say, with a sigh, "I am home" -homesick

jesper: “i been walkin' on this line for too long. i’ve been runnin' from my thoughts for too long” -let me feel low

wylan: “guess i must be satisfactory, you said you love me exactly the way i am. and you know i find it hard to understand” -sweet tooth

inej: “nobody gets exactly what they want,,,,,what do you want?” -calpol

jesper: “but I need to understand, when I can power through, and when I need some help from you. when I should stand my ground, and when I need to just sit down. sometimes I act like I know, but I'm really just a kid. with two corks in his eyes, and a bully in his head” -juliet

kaz: “it’s a perfect time to put my money in my mouth, chew it up and spit it directly on the ground” -telescope

nina: “i’ll figure out tonight what it is i need to do. fabricate a lie and relay it back to you” -telescope

inej: “It's alright to feel a little bit of darkness, now and then. i know I've said it once but I still tell myself again and again: you'll never be enough, but what is enough?” -banana bread

[crazy-loca-blog]

Meet My OC: Oliver Valentine

A/N: Of course I was going to use my OC card in the @openheartfanfics "Meet My MC" event to introduce him! If you thought Ethan was a protective husband, then you don't know Oliver Valentine, Casey's "evil" twin. Once again, I used the base template by @jamespotterthefirst. and I added some extra items to it.

~~*~~*~~

Oliver’s Bio

Full Name: Oliver Sean Valentine

Face Claim: Adrian Grenier

Nicknames: None

Birthday: December 3

Sexual orientation: Bisexual

Love Interest(s):  None at the moment, even though Casey insists that he should rekindle his relationship with his high school sweetheart, Emma.

Kids: None (yet)

Hair: Black

Eyes: Green

Height: 5'9"

Hometown: Abingdon, Virginia

Education: Lawyer / Duke University

Occupation: Freelance lawyer

Family: Maggie and Tom Valentine (parents, dead), Marie Smith (grandmother, dead), Casey Valentine (twin sister, alive)

Personal motto: “Every person deserves to be respected”

Background: Oliver and Casey grew up surrounded by love in a middle class family. His parents, Tom and Maggie, had been high school sweethearts and had been happily married for two years when the twins were born. After his parents died in a car accident, his grandma Marie took care of them for 20 years, until she passed away. He ows his popularity at high school not only to his good looks, but also to his sense of justice when it came to defend his peers, something he learned from his parents at a very young age.

Personality traits: Being raised together means that Oliver and Casey have a lot in common when it comes to their personalities. He is a noble guy who can't stand injustice. Since he was a kid he defended the weak and fiercely protected his sister. But whenever Casey avoids a conflict, he faces it. He is a very straight forward person, and he won't shut up if he has something to say. He has no filter when he is mad. This attitude causes that some people may not like him, but he couldn't care less about it. With Oliver, what you see is what you get.

On the relationship with his sister: The fact that they are twins made them have an unique bond. The fact that they lost their parents as such a young age only made that bond stronger. Casey is his best friend, and the only person in the world he knows he can openly talk about literally everything. She is also his biggest cheerleader, and the only one who had faith in him when he applied to law school. At first, he hated the idea of Casey leaving to Boston by herself. Now, he loves to see her being as happy as she deserves, even if that means sharing his sister with Ethan (lol). He truly aspires to have something like what she has in the future.

On his love life: Oliver is openly bisexual, and he has experienced with both men and women. However, when it comes to a serious relationship, he may be inclined to prefer girls, as his personal experiences have made him believe that girls tend to take commitment more seriously than guys. He won't admit it, but Casey knows his soulmate is Emma, his high school sweetheart. The only reason they broke up was because they were going to different universities and didn’t feel like having a long distance relationship after they graduated. But they've always remained friends, and they've kind of rekindled their romance in the past. Now they're both single and back in town. Time will tell.

On his parents accident: Their parents' accident hit Oliver and Casey differently. While Casey focused on healing (one of the reasons that led her to become a doctor), Oliver just wanted to have answers. That's why he went to law school. Despite living in a small town, he has always had this idea that "the Valentines' case" is kind of a taboo among older residents. People remember it, but no one talks about it. The fact that the case was closed because of lack of evidence (it was always said the responsible escaped and that they were never found, something that doesn't make sense at all, given the fact that the car crash was severe enough to kill his parents) doesn't help either. He feels the only way for him and Casey to find real peace is by finding out who did it. And he is determined to unveil the truth.

~~*~~*~~

10 Random Facts on Oliver

Oliver and Casey are one of those rare cases where one of the babies is born before midnight and the other one is born after midnight. So even though he legally was born one day before Casey, he's technically 10 minutes older than her (yes, their parents celebrated two birthdays on two different dates to keep them both happy).

He wasn't the most dedicated student, but he is incredibly smart. He was definitely one of those kids who didn't need to study a lot to get good grades.

Even though he knows Casey can defend herself, he may have helped her several times in high school without her noticing it. Even though Casey wasn’t at the bottom of the popularity list, the fact that Oliver was a popular kid may have helped her to be more respected by her peers.

He considers himself Casey's biggest fan, no matter what Ethan says. He has known her since she was literally an egg, and that's enough for him to win that discussion.

One of the reasons he became a lawyer is because he wanted to help all those people whose cases were closed with no answers. He knows how it feels because him and Casey have been trying to live with it, but he knows it’s hard sometimes. So he’d like for everyone to find the peace they deserve.

He likes writing and he is very talented. In fact, he may publish a novel someday. His grandma always thought that the biggest difference between him and Casey was how creative he was, so she always encouraged him to develop his artistic side.

After his parents' death, there was a time where he couldn’t express his emotions. Now, he has no problems telling how he feels (he'll always thank Emma for helping him overcome this), but he would never say ILY to another person without meaning it, he’s seen his sister going through hell because of some jerks, he wouldn’t forgive himself if he becomes one.

He loves kids and someday he'd like to have a bunch of them. But for now... damn! He can't wait for Casey and Ethan to come to their senses and to become parents so that he can become an uncle!

He has had a serious conversation with each and every one of Casey's boyfriends or potential boyfriends. The only conversation that ended up well was the one he had with Ethan. And nope, Casey doesn't know this conversation took place.

At first, Oliver didn't have the best opinion on Ethan. He thought he was an asshole and a coward for escaping to the Amazon and leaving his sister alone after all they had gone through (and yes, Oliver did tell Ethan this to his face during the chat mentioned above). His opinion only changed after he saw how much he cared about Casey during and after the incident (yes, he also told him this). Now he is sure that Ethan is the best thing that could have happened to his sister (and he made sure that Ethan knows it as well).

Tags: @adiehardfan @izzyourresidentlawyer

[snarwor]

Okay so you told me to keep talking so: Boba/Din: Din very POLITELY asking for punishment because Boba won't stop being soft and he wants to be a brat but he doesn't know how when Boba will not stop being gentle with him. Boba thinks it's straight up the funniest shit that he basically asked him for permission to act up before acting up and indulges him.

YES oh my god yes yes. I love you. Thank you. cw obv BDSM/punishment elements, anxiety?, fluff

This got a bit long and angsty but come on you know who’s writing lasdjkflaskjdf

----------------------------------------

Din was fucking frustrated.

It was thirty minutes to their usual bedtime and Boba wasn’t showing any sign of stopping what he was doing to come and give Din attention, no matter what he tried. He would knock little tools off of the workbench, which Boba would pick up quietly and kiss his knuckles for. He would harrumph and stomp around the ship, which would earn him a concerned look and another kiss to the inside of his wrist. He would press buttons he knew he wasn’t supposed to, and Boba would go un-press those buttons as soon as he noticed them, but wouldn’t say anything.

There was a bit of self-sabotage going on onboard Slave I, to say the least. The anger and frustration and all of the emotions Din had denied he had were simmering just under a boil, and he didn’t know what to do. They were still in hyperspace, and would be for several more hours. But daddy kept a bedtime, and daddy’s rule was law onboard. There was something crawling under Din’s skin, eager to come out and ruin all the nice things Din had now. So he paces. He knocks things off tables. He presses buttons. He makes little comments here and there which upset even himself.

And still, Boba didn’t look up at him with anything worse than exasperation.

Din knew Boba was going to leave him someday, but it didn’t make the thought any less hurtful to know it. He knew Boba would get fed up of daddying for Din, he knew he was going to become too much, someday, ask too much of him. And that anxiety sat in his chest, right under the surface, and made his heart pound fast when he said, “Why don’t you hate me?”

Boba looked at him sharply in concern. “What did you say?” he asked slowly.

“I’m obviously a brat. Why don’t you hate me or snap back at me?” Din felt cold all over, his gut sinking with the choice he’d made.

“...Din,” he said softly, his I’m trying to reason with you voice.

“No!” Din said. “Why?” he demanded.

Boba stood, crossed the deck over to him. “Because, ad’ika, you are mine.” He towered over Din, still in his armor while Din walked around in his soft clothes. “And I adore you no matter what you do. I promise you that.”

“But--”

“No buts.” Boba carded a hand through Din’s hair, and he was pushed just that extra inch off the cliff, tears spilling down his cheeks. “You are mine. I’m going to treat you with the care I always will.”

Din leaned his face into Boba’s hand, not hiding, but taking some reprieve, to gather his thoughts. “What if I didn’t want you to ignore it?”

“The misbehavior?” Boba clarified. Din nodded. “Hm,” Boba said thoughtfully. “Are you asking me for a punishment, Din?”

Din’s face went red. That was answer enough, but Boba needed the words. “Yes, daddy.”

It amused him, to be fair. He’d expected Din to be a bit shy about punishment, seeking softness and safety. Punishment hadn’t been something they’d discussed at length, usually it was one warning and Din was back to being Boba’s perfect boy. Boba kissed his forehead and gave him a hug. “Thank you for telling me.”

Din didn’t know quite what to do, now. What would they do? Would Boba follow through? Was he too bad to fix with a single punishment? His anxieties were once again at the surface of his thoughts, and it must have shown on his face, because Boba held him at arm’s length and looked at him. “Go wait in the bedroom, Din.”

“But--”

“Din.” There was a tone to Boba’s voice that made him shiver, something dark and promising and full of as-yet-unproven power. Din swallowed and went where he was told, sitting on the edge of the bed with his knees tight together, his fingers laced into a knot.

Boba let him stew in his own thoughts for several minutes before Boba returned, shutting the door behind him. He stood with his arms crossed, a frown on his face. “Din, do you want to tell me what you did? Don’t lie, because I already know. I want you to tell me.”

Deep, stomach-turning dread filled Din’s body, and he felt the tips of his ears go red. “I...” his mouth was dry. He swallowed and started again. “I don’t. Um.” He sighed, hanging his head a little. “I knocked things off the table you were working with, I made loud noises when you were working, I pushed buttons on the panel, and I said mean things...” He felt tears gather in his eyes. “I didn’t mean them daddy, I didn’t.”

Boba smartly kept his bearing, not letting Din know how affected by his tears he was. “I know you didn’t. Are you sorry for being a brat?”

Brat. There’s that word. The word that Din is.

“Yes, daddy, I’m sorry.” Din’s fingers folded themselves even tighter together.

Boba sat next to him. “Thank you for apologizing. It doesn’t make me happy when you’re a brat, so I think it’s time for a punishment.”

Din gave a confused noise. But he already...apologized?

Boba chuckled darkly. “Stand up. Pull down your keks.”

Din got up on shaky legs, and did as his daddy told him to do. In one swift movement, Din was pulled over Boba’s lap, his ass in the air. “You can hold onto my ankle, but you’re not allowed to let go if you do.” Din grabbed for it, something to ground him. His mind was spinning with how this might go. At the first swat to his behind, he was shocked more than hurt by it, and made another confused noise. “You will count them.”

“Yes daddy. One.”

Din managed to count them all with ease, until Boba picked up the pace and intensity, swatting at his sit spots at the top of his thighs, and even the tender skin on the inside of his thighs. At twenty, Din was hard, and slightly grinding on Boba’s leg. At thirty, Din started to tear up. At thirty-four, he cried. At forty-one, he was wailing and almost thrashing. Boba held him steady for the last nine spanks, all of them hard and blooming bright red marks on Din’s already-pink skin.

“F-f-fifty, daddy,” Din said through sobs, shaking in his lap. Boba hauled him up into a hug, careful of the marks on his ass. A quickly-slicked hand found its way around Din’s prick, and brought him off quickly. His boy cried through his release and collapsed all at once, all his strings cut.

“You did so good, baby. So good for daddy. I’m sorry that hurt, but daddy just wants you to be a good boy, and good boys don’t need punishments. But that’s okay, that’s okay,” Boba said between kisses to his head. “Daddy loves you no matter what.”

[angelbabyszn]

Something Real (Sad Eyes X Reader)

Gif by @merakiaes

Requested!

OMB Masterlist

"Y/N, please get out of your room. It's been two weeks. Come back into society. I need my big sister back." said Ruby as he leans against your bedroom door outside in the house after knocking on your door.

You recently broke up with Joker. A Santo member who was toxic to you.

For some odd reason, you didn't feel any sadness and anger. You weren't really into him at the start, you were into another member of the Santos, Sad Eyes.

The reason why you locked yourself up in your room to find yourself back and it oddly worked. You felt great as you finally reached a point that you were in a good place mentally and doing a lot of self-care.

Your family thinks you've been crying, blowing up his phone for hours, and eating ice cream while watching romantic movies like you usually do once you end a relationship.

Not this time. It was totally different and you were proud of yourself.

You got up from your desk to your bedroom door to unlock it. You opened it, making Ruby fall and landing on the floor. You giggle cause you knew he was eavesdropping. 

"Y/N!" shouted Ruby as he quickly got up and hugged you tight. You miss your little brother a lot. You wish you didn't have to shut him out for you to be yourself again but you wanted to come back better.

"I miss you little mano." you said after the hug ended and rub Ruby's hair crazy, making Ruby quickly stop you.

"Hey! Don't ruin the hair! I have a hangout later on today." said Ruby as he walks into your bedroom and fixes his hair in your mirror.

"You mean a date with Jasmine?" you said with your arms crossed against your chest and a smirk, making Ruby stop and look at you with wide eyes in shock. 

"Ruby, these walls ain't thick." you said and Ruby rolled his eyes and continued to fix his hair with his hands.

You grab your comb from your dresser and walk behind him. You stopped his hands and started to fix it with the comb through his hair.

"I think she's the right girl for you. She has been trying to get with you forever. Not being on sides but you're was kinda stupid not accepting her earlier. A regular girl would have moved on a long time ago. " you said, making Ruby have an upset face in the mirror. 

"Anyways, are you back to yourself, Y/N? I told you that dude was a a*shole." said Ruby and you stopped combing his hair and looked in the mirror to see him. 

"Yeah. I know. I wasn't into him for real." you said as you sit the comb on the dresser again and sit down on the edge of your bed, making Ruby quickly turn to you quickly.

"Wait, are you serious? If you are, then why date him?" asked Ruby as he walked over and sat next to you.

"I don't know. I think to distract myself from thinking about-"

"Y/N. Stop." said Ruby and you quickly looked at him with an upset face.

"Ruby, you can't stop me from liking somebody." you said as you looked at him seriously.

You just realized you put yourself through a toxic relationship to stop thinking about Sad Eyes.

After learning that, you put yourself back together and now you are better today and hopefully Ruby and the rest of your family will see that someday.

"I don't trust him. I don't approve of it. Especially now. Even though you just got out of a toxic relationship, you shouldn't get with somebody after that type of s*it happened. If you do, he would be a rebound." said Ruby and he starts to walk out of your room until he stops and looks back at you.

"Please...don't go out with him. Take it from your familia." said Ruby and he continues to walk out of your bedroom. 

You lean back on your bed and then start to stare up at the ceiling starting to go deep into your mind until you hear your phone go off.

You sit up on your bed and grab your phone that was charging on your bed and unplug it so you can see what it is.

You saw a message on your phone and your heart skipped a beat and smiled. It was Sad Eyes.

He has been texting you ever since you broke up with Joker making sure you're okay. 

You lean back on your bed again slowly as you look at his message and start to imagine scenarios in your head wondering what it would be like dating him in real life.

-

An hour later, you were on your way to get groceries. You were passing Spooky and Cesar's house with some of the gang members all over the front lawn.

"Y/N, where have you been?" 

You stop walking and turn your head to see Sad Eyes coming up to you and giving you a hug.

You quickly hugged him back as you felt safe in his arms. You miss hanging out with him. 

Sad Eyes stopped hugging you and he looked at you and your outfit. You were wearing a no sleeve red bodysuit with jean shorts on, gold vans, and your hair down straight.

"Look at Sad Eyes going soft for Y/N." 

You turned your head again to see Spooky looking at you and Sad Eyes while smoking, making a few of the Santos chuckling underneath their breath.

"Dude. It's not like that." said Sad Eyes with a tone to his voice at Spooky. 

“Whatever, mano. You’re fooling yourself.” said Spooky, knowing that it is. 

"What are you wearing?" said Sad Eyes and you looked down at your outfit and looked back up at him.

"Clothes. I got to go." you said as you tried to pass him but he stopped you.

"You are going nowhere wearing that." said Sad Eyes and looked at you up and down.

"Says the Santo who's looking at me now." you said with a smirk with your arms crossed against your chest. He immediately stops and Spooky and the other Santos laugh.

"Y/N. I'm serious. I'm going with you." said Sad Eyes. Knowing he won’t be convinced, you continued to walk down the sidewalk with Sad Eyes following you from behind.

-

An hour later, you and Sad Eyes exited the store. He was carrying the food in two big bags for you.

"You didn't have to do that for me." you said as you two walked to the side in front of the store to sit down on a bench.

"Why couldn't I? I'm just here to keep you safe, reina." said Sad Eyes as he looked at you with a smile. 

You love his smile so much. You completely fell for him deep and he doesn't even know.

"Thanks. I bet you have an amazing girlfriend." you said, making Sad Eyes quickly giving you his attention.

"Y/N, I'm single. Why do you think I was with somebody?" asked Sad Eyes as he looked at you puzzled. 

"I don't know...you're just a really great guy and I thought-"

"You thought wrong. I'm actually into somebody." said Sad Eyes as he smirks at you. That broke your heart. 

It didn't break completely but it still hurts. You felt jealousy going through your body a little bit.

"Really? Who is she?" you asked as you start to lean a bit closer to Sad Eyes to get some answers. 

Right before he could respond, he got a phone call and picked up after two rings. Two minutes later, he hung up.

"Y/N, I've loved to take you home but I got to do something for the gang. I'll get you a ride home." said Sad Eyes as he stands up and looks at you.

"It's fine. I'll walk home. I'm not that far from my house." you said as you grab your two bags of groceries while standing up.

"Are you sure? I can get Spooky to take you home. I don't want nothing bad to happen to you." said Sad Eyes as he got closer to you with concern in his eyes.

His concern is another thing that made you like him more. Nobody ever asked you often if you were okay and cared about you other than your family.

"Sí. Perfectamente bien." you said and did a warm smile so he won’t worry. 

Sad Eyes slowly backed away from you to make sure you are okay and a few moments later, he starts to jog away to do his task.

You sighed and started walking down the sidewalk with your groceries.

-

A few minutes later, you were almost home until a car beeped, making you jump surprised. You turned your head and you gasped at the sight of your eyes.

You never thought you would see your toxic ex again. He got out of his ride and he slowly walked up to you. You drop your groceries in fear.

"How are you doing baby?" asked Joker. You didn't respond because you were not feeling safe and felt he was going to do something to you.

"I said," said Joker and he put his right hand on your neck and he gripped on it. You try to move his hand to breathe but he won't budge "How are you doing baby?"

"You motherf*cker."

You and Joker's eyes looked to the sound of the voice. You felt your spirit lifted to see Sad Eyes pointing his gun to the side of Joker's head.

"Put her down...now." said Sad Eyes in a deep tone of voice that sounded dangerous to you. Joker smirked and he moved his hand from your neck, making you drop on the ground and try to catch your breath again.

"You have the f*cking nerve to put Y/N through a dangerous and toxic relationship, betray the gang, and come back into our streets?!" yelled Sad Eyes as he stared into Joker's eyes, furiously. You quickly get up from the ground and get behind Sad Eyes a few feet away. 

"What happened to you? You used to be my amigo." said Sad Eyes furiously as he starts to remember his friendship with him throughout the years.

"Wanna know what happened? Y/N's the reason." said Joker with a smirk and Sad Eyes turned back to see you frightened in fear and he turned back to your toxic ex.

"She's too good. She gave me everything I wanted and needed. She was the girl that I wanted my whole life." said Joker, making Sad Eyes punch him causing you to gasp. 

"Then I found out she was into you. She was using me as a distraction to stop thinking about you." said Joker on the ground with a bloody nose and Sad Eyes slowly looked back at you again. 

"Is that true?" asked Sad Eyes as he looked at you for answers. Right before you could respond, Sad Eyes got hit by the end of Joker's gun, ending him on the ground.

"Sad Eyes!" you shouted and you held a gun click. It made your attention back to Joker as he was pointing a gun at you while walking slowly up to you. You slowly backed away with your hands up.

"After I found that out, I decided to join the Prophet$ to get revenge after our break up." said Joker with an evil smirk.

"You never actually like me! You only liked me for my body and you know it! It was always about you! Your pleasure! What you wanted! Not what I wanted! That's what our relationship toxic, you a*shole!" you yelled at him furiously as tears started to flow down your face.

"Toxic? I don't think it was. It was beautiful. Until you got feelings for this jacka*s over here so I'm here to finish the job to be fully accepted into the gang...killing him." said Joker and he turns around to Sad Eyes to point the gun at him again but he wasn't there.

"What the h-"

Sad Eyes punches Joker again mid sentence and ends him dropping to the ground again. Sad Eyes starts to beat him up on the ground with Joker trying to fight back.

You started to scream, not knowing what to do as the two men fought with their life on the line as guns were involved around them.

"This is for betraying Santos." said Sad Eyes in a deep furious rage voice and punched Joker's face again.

"And this is for Y/N. The most amazing and beautiful girl you're ever regret messing with in your f*cking life!" shouted Sad Eyes furiously as he punches Joker multiple times ending with a bone cracking.

Sad Eyes groaned tired while slowly got up on his feet with two bloody hands dripping from his hand to the ground.

Sad Eyes slowly look at you and you quickly run up to him and hug him tight while crying. Him makes a noise that sounds like he's hurt.

He looks down at you and sees you crying into his chest with your arms wrapped around his waist

"Hug me back...please." you said softly in Sad Eyes chest as tears were flowing down your cheeks. Sad Eyes hesitated for a moment until he slowly wrapped his arms around your waist.

You did a soft smile as you felt safe again in his arms. You couldn't believe that just happened now with Joker knocked out not knowing if he's alive or not.

You started to think about this all happening again another day, making you scared again and start to tense up. Sad Eyes started to shush you quietly to calm you down.

"It's over. You don't have to worry about him ever again." said Sad Eyes softly as you slowly nodded.  

Sad Eyes was feeling sad because he never wanted this to happen to you. Sadly, it happens to everyone one day while living on the block.

-

An hour later, you and Sad Eyes were sitting on the couch together at your house trying to process what happened quietly. Abuela stops Sad Eyes bleeding and puts stitches on his face a few minutes ago leaving both of you alone.

Sad Eyes turned his head to see you looking down at your lap and playing with your own fingers. 

"I actually mean it." said Sad Eyes, making you stop and look at him confused.

"The whole 'amazing and beautiful girl' thing." said Sad Eyes and your eyes widened as you remember him saying that to Joker. 

"Really?" you asked and Sad Eyes nodded. He scouted a bit closer to you causing your heart to start to beat a little bit faster.

Sad Eyes gets even closer to you and he grabs your right cheek and starts to caress it. He starts to stare into your eyes to see your whole true soul before kissing you softly.

You felt your whole soul lifted and completed as your heart being out of your chest as Sad Eyes kisses you with his rough lips.

After that sweet kiss ended, you decided to come clean. 

"Sad Eyes, I really like you. A long time now. I think I might, no I've fallen for you. Deep. Before I dated Joker. I'm so sorry. If I just came out like right now, none of this wouldn't-"

Sad Eyes kisses you again to stop your rambling and you kiss him back almost immediately. After the kiss, both of you leaned your foreheads together and clucked quietly making a memory. 

"What the h*ll is going on here?!"

You and Sad Eyes quickly got up from the couch and turned around to see your whole family shocked, especially Ruby.

Ruby was about to yell again at you until you decided to start talking first.

"I can't do this anymore. My familia, I like him. So much. I really do. I want to be with him. He wants to be with me too. Please..." you said to your family and Sad Eyes grabbed your hand and held it with his. 

"Fine. If he broke your heart, I'll kill him." said Ruby seriously with his arms crossed against his chest until your mom hit him on his arm. Ruby held his arm in pain which made everybody but him chuckle.

"I won't. I promise." said Sad Eyes and kissed you again.

He never broke that promise.

[mirainawen]

Some headcanons for The Long Road that absolutely nobody asked for

Who’s the messiest one:

Everyone has their places that they are the messiest one in.

dean: when he cooks, he does not clean up the kitchen afterward. he reasons that cleanup is sam's detail, because that splits the work 50-50. most of the time, sam is okay with this because he doesn't particularly enjoy cooking and is tired of takeout. he'll bitch dean out in three circumstances: 1, he hasn't been there (fair), 2, he wanted to eat out (less fair), 3, DID YOU REALLY HAVE TO WRECK THE WHOLE KITCHEN TO BAKE A FRICKIN PIE (least fair).

when it comes to the state of his room, though, dean falls right between sam and adam. it's his space, so he reasons everyone can mind their own business. sometimes he is really on top of it; other stretches of time, he'll let things pile up / get out of place before he'll do something about it.

you so much as leave a to-go cup in Baby, though, and God help you.

sam: between the three of them, sam tends to be the most orderly and tidy. BUT, leave that man alone to his own devices in the library? he's probably fallen asleep atop an entire table of "organized chaos" of open books, pages of notes, a new (unimplemented) filing system, a dozen bookmarked tomes, and a couple dozen pens lost amid the chaos. sam in research mode + cross-referencing & digitizing & organizing the men of letters' archives into a streamlined and interconnected, coherent system is...a lot. just like A Lot. and it Shows. (and sam's loving every minute of it. utterly geeking out in his own head.)

adam: is a disaster child. he'll let shit pile up until he has to deal with it, or is otherwise bitched at enough by (usually) sam. he doesn't have a lot of stuff, so it can't reach actual problem levels in the bunker. but he's totally the kind to be like, "what the hell? how long has this been here? hey, guys, when did we eat at burger king? oh god, we should definitely toss that at the next gas station. what? no i'm not going searching for a trash can right now" about his car.

Who feels the most uncomfortable about PDA:

it is, get this, sam. i know, i know. hear me out. when given the option, adam can and will be affectionate within reason. he's the most uptight and gunshy about it at first, when he just gets out of the cage; tends to withdraw from people getting too close, always on edge; as a survivor of the most Traumatic Thing in the Universe, that is more than fair and expected.

once he's had time to find his footing with sam & dean, however, he'll greet them with a bro-hug, when appropriate, a slap on the back, a nudge of the elbow, lowkey affection like that.

dean came back from purgatory more affectionate than he'd ever been before. much more readily will not only greet with a hug, but say goodbye (even in 'casual' partings) with a hug.

that leaves sam, who used to be considered more mushy than dean by these terms. dean's lowkey affection he's used to. adam's? nah. no. especially in the first 5 years, for the amount of time that adam does it (before shit gets Real Bad). after adam gets out of the institution, he gravitates more towards sam naturally, even when pissed, and sam's kinda lowkey why is he in my personal space??? weird. because it doesn't innately fit the same kind of way it does with dean. post-reintegration, he's more affectionate after they've found their footing again. he tries to make up for the Bad Years with more slaps on the shoulder kind of affection. boy's trying.

Who’s the funniest drunk:

sam is a disaster drunk. he's the biggest lightweight of the three of them, which is funny because he's also the biggest, just like the biggest in general. dean becomes so much fun in unexpectedly different kinds of ways. like, he can be talked into karaoke. or doing some stupid shit he's gonna regret in the morning because odds are it's not gonna end well.

but adam is straight up hilarious. that sharp wit comes out, and all his inhibitions (and image) are gone so he just straight up cracks the worst jokes ever and gets away with it. they land. somehow they land. maybe because sam & dean are also drunk. maybe because he is just that funny. maybe it's that he has a tendency to get blackout-wasted and do stupid shit that makes no sense whatsoever, like shower with his f*ckin socks on and dean is never gonna let that shit die.

Who texts the most:

adam or dean. during large periods of time in the first 5 years, adam will leave dean on read and dean texts because read receipts means he knows when adam is checking his messages and therefore he knows adam is at least alive, if not entirely alright. by that view, dean texts the most.

but for random shit, that would be adam. he'll text dean something like

with either no caption, or something like: this reminds me you need to hit the gym, or looks like you have competition and doesn't give further context. dean doesn't mind because at least it means the kid's not dying in a basement somewhere.

he'll kick his ass for the fat comment later

Who reads the most:

it goes in this order:

sam "i read this entire book in one sitting cause i had the time, and now i am awake at 1am because i can't decide if i want to start another one since i have down time" winchester

adam "does it have cool illustrations? no? fine, at least tell me the lore on boobries is correct" milligan

dean "what job has the least amount of reading?" winchester

Who has the most embarrassing taste in music:

eff. ing. adam. even in his own car (where, hey, the rules are driver picks the music dean!) he's only allowed a certain amount of time for his "whiny teenage garbage music" (thanks dean) before he has to change it to something a little more tolerable (rock, at the very least). heaven help him if he hints at something country with dean around. dean will be like, sit your ass down it's time for REAL music 101 and put on Metallica for the 8th time.

Who’s better with kids:

adam, with dean a very, very close second! so close, they probably tie. adam, early on, isn't good with anyone because fresh-out-of-the-cage (even post-institution for a bit) makes him kind of a hairs-breadth triggered bomb when it comes to people of all ages. but adam a bit more balanced? a natural. he grew up around extended family, friends, wanted kids of his own someday.

sam, however, is the absolute worst. a pure disaster moron in this arena. when adam is de-aged? dean didn't think it was possible for sam to suck so much at something. (don't worry, the boy found his bearings. but oh man...the road to get there, paved with more potholes than road.) BUT when sam really tries? like if he lets himself relax and lowers his inhibitions, he can do pretty well. but he's mostly just Highly Uncomfortable around kids, and like, it Shows.

Who’s the one that fixes things around the house:

dean. put that boy in the garage, under the hood of a car, great. can do it all. put that boy in front of a little home repair? renovation? by god he'll figure it out. and he won't put a hole in the wall shut up sammy. he takes pride in the upkeep of the bunker.

sam, however, is much more content to just be like ah man i wish we had a shelf here. or, oh right we need to remember to do xyz and then sit back and wait for it to Magically Take Care of Itself.

Who’s got the weirdest hobby:

hobby? what the hell is that? a homeless person?

Who cooks and who cleans up:

dean cooks, sam cleans. adam cooks, sam and dean will rock-paper-scissors for cleanup. or leave adam to do it. sam is never allowed to cook. he's a horrible cook. they'd literally rather eat out than let sam cook. sam, of course, is highly insulted, but also like...he knows dean & adam are better cooks. they just are. yes, fine, he'll wash the dishes again.

every now and then he gives it a shot. surprisingly he makes really good pancakes. he'll cook just to force one of the others to have to cleanup when he's tired of being on dish duty. dean & adam are not impressed when he tries to leverage sandwiches for dish duty.

sam, somewhat sloshed on a saturday night will be like, guys! guys! hey why don't i make us food and dean and adam are like, duuuuuude. ...wait, no. sam- and he's like, no, guys, i got this, and brings them microwave burritos. and THEN they're like hey! no! this does NOT mean we're doing dishes!

[smileyoongle]

Deception (A Kim Namjoon Mafia AU)

Summary: A damsel in distress and a lonely mafia leader. Different but not too different. The two worlds collide on a rainy night when Kim Namjoon, a renowned Mafia leader is called for an emergency and Y/N Y/L/N is on the run from her abusive father. Feelings stir and he rescues her. But one of them is a liar. And the other's life is on the line. It's only a matter of time until all secrets are out in the open.

Will love be born? Or will death conquer?

chαptєr ƒ⊕ur: Missed Me?

Character Count: 9266

Pairing: Namjoon×Reader (Appearances by the whole of BTS)

---------------------------------------

And all I loved, I loved alone.

- Edgar Allan Poe

----------------------------------------------------------

Do you think it'll be okay to go to his house?" Hoseok voiced, giving concerned glances to all the members. It had been two days and Namjoon had not interacted much with anyone. His phone calls were always short and abrupt, ending with him saying 'I am busy. I'll call you later.'

Hana stood near the window, staring outside at the bright sky while watching all the members through their reflection on the clean window.

"Why not? You guys have known each other for so long." She stated, turning around with a confused frown.

Yoongi sighed and rubbed his eyes. He felt utterly ridiculous with all the thinking he had done. Too many things were happening all at once.

"The last time we saw him, he seemed a little distracted. I think there's something on his mind." Jin said, narrowing his eyes and staring at the ceiling. It was true. In all the years that the gang had spent together, this was the first time that Namjoon seemed so out of it.

"Maybe you should just tell him that you found me. He'll definitely come, right?"

Yoongi gritted his teeth and gave her a glare. He didn't know why he felt so uncomfortable around her. He just knew that she wasn't the same. She had become tougher and.... selfish.

"We're not gonna do that. Especially since you won't tell us where you were all this time." He said coldly.

Everybody nodded in agreement while Hana sighed and shook her head.

"I just....I think he should be the first one to know." She replied, her voice strained. Jungkook clenched his fists and looked at her. After everything that he had done for her, this is what she had to say?

He stood up and walked towards her, watching as she gulped and took a step back.

"Why? Because none of us suffered? Because none of us blamed ourselves for your death?!"

Jungkook looked like he was ready to pounce on her but his anger was justifiable. Since the past two days, everyone had been trying to ask Hana where she was and what she was doing, only to get the same response.

'I won't say unless Joon comes here.'

Jungkook was the most effected but he tried to understand. Of course, Namjoon had known Hana for longer but that doesn't mean her bond with Jungkook was less special. Hana was the first woman Jungkook cared about, he saw her as his older sister and swore to protect her. After her supposed death, he had taken the longest time to recover. He was the one who didn't give up when everyone else was trying to move on.

Yoongi stood up and placed a hand on Jungkook's shoulder, giving it a comforting squeeze. With a disappointed shake of his head, Jungkook stormed out of the gang's house, Hoseok following him right after.

With a sigh, Yoongi turned his attention to Hana, feeling satisfied on seeing the guilty look that she sported.

"We all searched day and night for you, Hana. I hope you know that."

With that, Yoongi left the room, preparing to call Namjoon again.

∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆

You flicked through the channels on the TV, sighing in annoyance when you couldn't find anything worth watching. Namjoon was currently talking to someone on the phone. You guessed it was business stuff cause he looked a little frustrated.

The last two days, Namjoon had spent a lot of time with you. You got to know him more and you would be lying if you said you didn't like his company. He was a gentleman in every way possible. And you remembered every single conversation that you had with him. Why? Cause it was the first time that you had a normal conversation with someone.

Cause he was worth remembering.

You switched off the TV and turned your attention to the window, admiring the expanse of greenery that covered Namjoon's house. Now that you thought about it, his house was a little too isolated. Also, you didn't see anyone around the area. No mailman. No newspaper guy. No girl scouts. Nothing.

It was the house. Maybe Namjoon was just fond of peace and quiet, you figured. Or maybe he just wanted to avoid the cameras. Cameras that'd watch over him like a hawk only to give rise to a number of scandals which never really happened.

He was a businessman after all.

You turned your head away from the window when you felt the couch dipping beside you. You smiled at Namjoon warmly, making his heart flutter.

"What were you thinking?" He asked, leaning his head on the back of the couch as he faced you. You shrugged in response and busied yourself with your fingers.

"Just...things."

"A penny for your thoughts."

You bit your lip, not looking up at him. Because you knew what would happen if you looked at his eyes. Your heart would jump out of your chest and you'd melt under his gaze. You hated that feeling.

Clearing your throat, you sat up straighter.

"I wanna work." You confessed, slowly looking at Namjoon to note his reaction. He raised his eyebrows at you in question.

"I mean I can atleast get a part time job, right?" You asked, clenching the hem of your shirt tightly. Namjoon opened his mouth to say something but ended up pursing his lips.

After a minute of silence, Namjoon chuckled nervously.

"Why-why do you wanna work?"

The problem wasn't with you working. The problem was that someday someone would find out that you were living with him. They could hurt you just to get to him. And even though he shouldn't feel so protective over you, he couldn't help himself.

"I never had a chance to live life like a normal person, you know. Going to work, hanging out with friends, going on dates....I had none of it." You explained, looking at the floor with a sad smile.

Namjoon felt his heart sink. If it were upto him, he'd give you everything in a heartbeat. He didn't like the idea of you going on dates but he had to suck it up.

Suddenly, his eyes lit up as an idea came to his mind.

Date.

"You wanna go out for dinner tonight?"

Your eyes widened and you looked at him in surprise.

"Me?" You asked, pointing at yourself. Namjoon chuckled in response and nodded. You turned your eyes away as you tucked a piece of hair behind your ear. You were hesitant. Of course, you had warmed up to Namjoon in the past couple of days but this was new to you.

If anything, you were probably the most socially awkward person on the planet, blame it on the lack of communication you had with the outside world. You felt your chest tighten when you thought about your life before Namjoon. You needed a fresh start.

"I'd like that." You muttered.

Namjoon was on cloud nine. Even if it was just a friendly dinner, it was a start. He was determined to get you to warm up to him. He couldn't tell how serious his infatuation with you was, but he knew that you were a ray of hope. You were a sign that he could live life normally. He could pretend that he wasn't a mafia leader with you. He could keep you safe with him and he could make his own small world within the boundaries of his house. Only if it was that simple.

∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆

Namjoon tugged at the jacket, brushing off the nonexistent dust from it. He sighed in content on seeing his appearance. This had to be a good night.

He was surprised at how he had changed in just a matter of three days. He never cared about his appearance, never thought about how he looked but now he was happily spending an hour in his closet, deciding what would make him look good and what wouldn't.

He left his room, patiently pacing in the living room as he waited for you to get ready. Namjoon felt giddy and anxious, his emotions getting the best of him. While he was busy, glancing at your door, he didn't notice the incoming call on his phone. Yoongi's name flashed across the screen but there wasn't any ringing. Just because Namjoon had decided to put it on silent.

After what seemed like hours to Namjoon, the door to your bedroom opened and you descended down the stairs, biting your lip and fiddling with the lace on your dress. Namjoon's heart skipped a beat. The baby blue dress made you look like an angel and he absolutely loved it.

You stood in front of him and smiled, thinking of things to say to lighten the atmosphere. But the doorbell beat you to it.

You and Namjoon glanced at the door. You were beyond surprised since no one ever came to Namjoon's house. This was a first.

Namjoon unlocked the door, frowning in confusion because no one really knew where he lived. Except for the rest of the gang of course.

But the minute he opened the door and saw who stood on the other side of it, he stopped breathing.

"Hana..." He whispered, not being able to believe that his best friend was really back. His eyes turned glossy and he couldn't move anymore. Not even when Hana threw her arms around his neck and cried into his chest.

Whereas you. You didn't even know how to feel. A number of emotions flooded you but you stood there gawking as the strange girl hugged Namjoon while crying. Judging by how Namjoon's arms slowly wrapped around her waist, you could tell they were close.

You slowly backed up the stairs, concluding that maybe it was best to leave them alone. You closed the door of your bedroom just as Yoongi entered the house, followed by the rest. They all sympathetically glanced at the affectionate exchange, keeping quiet even though they had a thousand questions in their mind.

You sat on the edge of your bed, knowing that there was gonna be no dinner tonight. That's not what you cared about actually. For some reason, you couldn't shake off the uneasy feeling that engulfed you after watching that girl hug Namjoon. You felt really betrayed. But you had no right to.

Namjoon probably knew that girl for a long time whereas you, you just came into his life. You lay on the bed, letting your thoughts consume you even though you knew it wasn't good for you. These thoughts would lead to dangerous nightmares later and your sleep schedule would be completely messed up.

You heard the front door shut followed by complete silence. Everyone had probably left, including Namjoon.

You sighed and closed your eyes, falling asleep with the image of his eyes gazing into yours.

∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆ ∆

Everything was long forgotten as Namjoon sat in the gang's house, waiting for Hana to begin her story. He still wasn't sure how he felt after seeing Hana alive, but he knew that he was grateful for it. The agony of being reminded every day about his best friend's death had finally come to an end, although Namjoon would have appreciated it if it would have been sooner.

"So, care to tell us where you had been all this time?"

Taglist: @uwunamjoon @shadowstark @addy-nerd @tzuyyyuuu @stressedinmedschool247 @ifellinluvwithdorks @min-t-posts @floofwrites @pretty-in-pink-just-because @bts-d-onut @fangirllbookworm @mystical-writer @it-is-dana @ximaginx @kpopgirlbtssvt @pearylove @wtfkimbab @anothermisspark

Tell me if you wanna be added to the taglist! Hope y'all enjoyed this part..!

-XX

[ixeliema]

Okay this is going to be pretty personal and potentially triggering so I'm leaving that here at the top. I'm going to be discussing depression and self harm here and I will tag accordingly. I will not be specific or speak of it in detail because a lot of people read posts like these at their lowest points and it does nothing but hurt already very troubled people to read.

These bubbles are covering an injury I inflicted upon myself at work today after my manager called me in to a meeting with him to speak about the amount of missed days of work I'd taken in the last two-three weeks.

How it happened doesn't matter. The only context you need for it is that I missed four days due to a contagious illness and one day due to a stomach bug that had me physically unable to leave the bathroom. I work long hours and in my store's home department. I work hard and never do things 80% or lower at work and it's exhausting at times.

Well...yesterday I had a panic attack that lasted for almost four hours and knew I couldn't work in this state. I had been curling into a ball, screaming, sobbing, (tw) pulling my hair.

I called in and my manager told me we'd need to talk about my missed days. Fine. I accept that. Today I dreaded the inevitable call back and when it happened he told me that two of my customers had filed complaints on me within two days last week.

One I will admit is justified. He was talking about gun issues and complaining that retail stores should sell guns, meanwhile I am from a college that was shot up and I am fucking terrified of guns. I don't mind not selling them. Especially in light of El Paso recently.

The other was a lady who noticed I was sweaty and tired after having to manually enter her discounts for about 25 apparel items because her digital coupon wasn't ringing right and it was a system issue. I had an injury between my fingers at the time and all the typing to fix the prices was pulling apart my scab and I had begun to bleed through my bandage. At the end of the transaction, she made eye contact with me and asked "I'm sorry...are you IRRITATED with me?" I don't remember exactly what I said but I said something like "no ma'am I'm bleeding". Well apparently 'no' means I'm still a bitch who needed reported to her manager.

The first...fine. I was out of line there. I shouldn't have let him goad me on. But the second pisses me off. Not happy because three strikes on my record is cause for termination due to disregard for customer satisfaction. This sucks a lot. But then my manager talks about my missed days and why they happened. I mentioned my sicknesses and cited a literal rule (if you are contagious or having issues with bodily fluids don't come in" at him. Yesterday I told him my situation. I was unable to breathe. See. Anything. I cited my mental illness and told him it was very bad yesterday. He kind of brushed me off. (Which in itself fucking infuriates me bc mental health isn't a goddamn joke!)

Then he told me to evaluate myself and whether or not this job is right for me. I also have a physical injury and I require a brace. Even with it sometimes I have sore days and pain that I can't control due to walking about four to five miles a day at work. It sucks but with the brace I can survive. I need this job to live after all, and I don't mind the coworkers or the job itself. It just sucks when I'm working 48 hours in a row with a lot of mental and physical barriers to my success.

He told me to my face that if I didn't feel I was capable of doing the job to quit. And then he told me he needed someone "more reliable" for the position because of the business' needs.

I kind of broke at that point. And I blacked out into a relapse of my self harm after the meeting was through. I pride myself on two things: my sense of humor even in dark times (comes with the territory of mental illness), and the fact that I strive to be reliable. My manager telling me to my face that I wasn't reliable broke me.

See I would be more understanding if he hadn't just told me that five of my six missed days were perfectly acceptable. But after he learned of the last one amd why he kind of shifted gears. And I hated it very much.

He's worked for x corporation nearly 20 years and no one will question his authority. He works hard and is pretty good with his workers. Honestly he's a little sexist and clearly doesn't think mental illnesses are a big deal, but he's good at what he does. So hearing an authority figure (the type of person I've learned to fear because I'm never good enough) tells me I'm not one of the qualities I fucking FIGHT for...I broke.

But this story isn't why I wanted to post it. Yeah I could rant about the rude manager and the customers and that dumb "customer is always right" mentality (which they could prove wrong if they just looked up the security footage for the rude lady!)

No I'm here because when I got home from working 2-11...bordering tears and panic all day and sweatier than anyone living in Arizona right now...I hopped in the bath for a soak and to give myself time to heal from the long arduous day.

My mind has been full of intrusive thoughts about my worth and how I broke my streak of being clean from self harm and how that makes me a coward. That kind of joyous stuff.

I sat up to get my phone to text my friend and saw that my knee (where my injury is) was covered in bubbles.

I don't know why...but that means a lot to me right now. Like...I'm taking care of myself after probably the worst day I've had since my dad died. I'm taking time to heal. I'm trying to pick up the pieces of my soul after a long and painful day. And it felt like for a moment, the universe understood that looking at my wound hurt me as much as the wound itself hurt. It wanted me to not dwell on it.

Obviously this isn't a magic "I'm no longer depressed" moment but for me, seeing the bubbles...a sign (at least to me) of trying to take care of myself masking the pain of my depression and anxiety.

Today has been a very tough day for me with a lot of manic episodes and a lot of depressive ones, and though I can wear the face that I'm okay...it cracked a lot today and I let my ugly side seep out. And seeing the bubbles covering my wound I deadass cried about it, y'all.

This tells me that even on your worst days, taking care of yourself and trying to find time to recover can help you to heal. And I wanted to post this because I think this story might help someone. Even just one person. Maybe even just myself someday when out of the blue I check my (very small) tag for original posts.

The TLDR of this is that this occurence kind of showed me that taking care of yourself...even in tiny, seemingly insignificant ways, can really help you to not dwell on pain as much.

And before someone hijacks this and says this won't apply to everyone...I know. But I hope someone sees this image of bubbles on a goddamn kneecap and thinks to themselves that they ought to take better care of themselves after a bad day. After a relapse. After feeling so defeated you considered suicide. Consider healing. Consider trying to help yourself, even just in one small way.

That's about all I have to say other than "fuck I work the next three days and I'm not stoked to go fake a smile as a cashier for 27 more hours even if I'm being paid"