thinking about how eiji's a pole vaulter and how ash talks about eiji "flying" and how eiji's associated with bird imagery and how eiji's free (unlike ash) and how eiji comes in on a plane and leaves on a plane and how ash cannot fly, ash cannot be free, how nyc is ash's prison, and how ash is the leopard who dies climbing the mountain, unable to live at such elevation, how he was trying to reach the sky and be free but was always stuck to the earth, how he chose to die instead of climbing back down, how he chose to die where he could see the sky and hope and freedom almost like a bird with eiji's letter right in front of him rather than letting everything go wrong and ruin it once again, how eiji's a failed pole vaulter anyway, how a bad fall ruined his career and grounded him (physically and emotionally), how it took flying to america and meeting ash and needing to save him and skip for him to try flying again, how he landed hard and harsh and still the thought of that escape compelled ash to protect eiji at all costs because if he could fly that means something to him, even if he doesn't think he can fly, how eiji is the manifestation of his hope and how when he breaks and asks eiji to stay with him a while he folds himself over his legs and weighs him down and traps him and grounds him, how ash fights like hell to keep eiji alive not because he thinks he can be like him (hopeful, flying, innocent), but because he makes him forget the gravity of his situation, and so he can see eiji fly again. how he wants to see him escape. how eiji is a bird and ash is a wildcat and how ash never once saw eiji as prey. how eiji never saw ash as a predator. how it is eiji's naivete that first endears ash to him, how it is his freedom and flight and removal from darkness and his ability to leave that darkness that really roots eiji in ash's blood as something essential to him keeping on living in this hell of nyc. how it is that distance from the violence and that hope for the future that ash chooses to surround himself in as he dies. how ash dies in a dream because he feels more than anything that he can't fly like eiji, that he can never leave. how his violence is a part of him and will be forever, how it weighs him down. how he wants to enjoy the view from the mountainside rather than looking up from the ground below. as if they can both fly. as if he is with him up there and not grounded. eye-to-eye with what he can't have, seeing eiji's homeland: the sky. how he dies trying to reach the top because he couldn't take retreating and trying again. how ash, tired and tired and tired and convinced it will go on forever if he crawls back down the mountain, chooses to close his life deluged in eiji, in eiji's insistence that they can fly together, in eiji's hope for him and for them, in eiji's beautiful dream. how ash dies without trying to realize that dream. how ash, in dying, destroys it.
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Linktober Day 9
Deity
*sneezes after downing coffee* Well irl stuff got in the way so I'm way behind my original schedule for these and for Linktober but here we go with another arguably short one, fuelled purely by self indulgence, headcanons, spite against my linguist essays that kept me from keeping to schedule, severe sleep deprivation, a shout out to the Ender Lilies soundtrack and Majora's Mask soundtrack, and Nintendo for not clarifying anything about the lore so I'm snatching what I can and making it my own lol. Look, when you fíxate so much on details the Zelda team doesn't elaborate on you have to fill in the gaps with what you can.
As always can be read as romantic or platonic, technically in a LU context but not explicitly in it by itself.
The Lord of the Mountain liked hearing people sing.
In a way, it wasn’t a surprise, Hylia and the Golden Three each had their ballads and symphonies and minuets, each splendid and with cuts of their divinity in it, Farore was fond of lightning and forest alive minuets, and you could swear Farosh sparked just a bit brighter when one would him the beginnings of the Minuet of the Forest near their spring, Din was fond of boleros, fiery and alive and howling with the echo of flame touching earth that made a shine run through Dinraal’s scales, Nayru, in contrast, was much fonder of blizzard and river quiet serenades, the songs of contemplation at first snow ringing clear when Naydra curled around it’s spring, content to be free of Malice.
And of course Hylia had her ballads and lullabies, perfectly fitting to her display of divinity, of honey days and vast bird like wings, of ambered summers to come and to pass and dazzling solar storms of starlight and sunlight sparking through the human form of her descendants and heroes. So in a way, you weren’t surprised at all that the Lord of the Mountain – Satori, with a familiar touch of londsleite divinity, the hunt of the woodland beasts and diamondscar adoration for the Hero of the Wilds, similar in glory to the Light Spirits petrichor and vermeil fondness for the Hero of the Twilight – liked to listen to people sing. What you were surprised was how it attempted to follow along, it’s head across your lap the second you sat down in the clearing, a gentle hum on back of it’s throat, an owl’s cry and a cicada’s humming and faintly, chirring purring as presses it’s faces into your hands, a gentle request for petting.
It was adorable, even with the faint notes of the chill of clear spring water on winter and the livewire feeling of magic, like holding your hand too close to a flame but not quite touching it.
A low chuckle brushes against the back of your mind, a feeling like biting on ice, the prowl of a wild beast and the build up of lightning and light used to create his blade, the amused affection of a warrior reconvening with their brother in arms, you think you see the bone ivory of the Deity’s hair on the side of your vision, though you know he’s not physically there, ‘He likes you.’
You hum, gently patting behind it’s ears, pushing through the chill, gracefully not mentioning the burning with a smile at the mythic being’s faint chirring, birdsong and the wind through cherry blossoms that sparkle like rose quartz, “Well I quite like him too, I can see where it’s gentleness comes from.”
The ghost of a touch over your hair, the caress of lightning striking over your skin and the hair on the back of your neck pricking up and the crisp cold of winter, the chill of the ending and the flame of a new dawn, of new days, the phantom of magnolias and spring water on your tongue. The fragrance of pine, daffodils and blood soaked lilies on ashen fields on your senses, gentle and careful, marking but not claiming, ‘Only because it’s you, beloved. It’s not something easily given.’
You sigh, shakily composing yourself, you let yourself relax into the phantom sensation. Of hopes and dreams and healed suffering, of the divinity of hunt turned into protection and lightning given form, of tangled timelines and crystalized memories, “I know. It does not change my opinion, either way.”
To be the subject of a god’s care and regard was dangerous, after all. For the human and the deity in question, you know the stories from your world well, of the effects of Hylia on First and Sky, of Twilight and the personification of the Twilight Realm and the spirits of his land, of Wild and clawing from death’s embrace into that of the wilderness.
Knew how the fact the Fierce Deity’s mere proximity causing pain on those who changed him into hunting for hunt’s sake into protection for the sake of someone else cut deeper than even the ever encroaching entropy all beings must one day face. It was no wonder the Song of Healing was his creation, to want to ease the burden.
You gladly grant him some peace, in turn, even if it wasn’t much. It’s the least you can do, for always having his ways of watching over your heroes.
“Join me? We can make a duet.”
You feel more than see him shift, ephemeral, fleeting, gentle against the edges of your existence, as foreign to Hyrule as your own, sparking over your spine as you feel ozone and rust on your teeth. Satori is humming again to match the rumble of thunder in the man’s voice, the heralding of songs of war and elegies for the dead, ‘Of course, though I’m afraid I do not know many songs, besides…’
“It’s alright,”, you smile faintly, there’s a white ocarina in his hands, as he leans, a spectre against your side, “I’ll teach you some of my own, though you’ll have to forgive me if I don’t remember all the lyrics.”
‘It would be my honor to learn.’
You think he smiles, from the fluttering of something ancient and long forgotten against your side.
You sing to Satori and the Chain, a small respite of familiar and forgotten tunes, the Lord of the Mountain hums along. The Fierce Deity’s song cutting through any nightmares that may ail your heroes for another night.
When the dawn of a new day comes, the feeling of divinity against your skin feels just a bit more obvious, sinking into every crack of your being like a shroud, falling over your boys like a veil, reflecting the breath of eternity over Hyrule.
(First gives you a look that’s half exasperation, half understanding. Sky pointedly sticks to your side as Time looks you over, markings deep with vibrant color. You shrug with a helpless smile as you feel the lightest brushes of Hylia’s fond days of gold and starlit summers days against the Lord of the Mountains warm, luminous affection and the Fierce Deity’s smug, but content lonsdaleite smile.)
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hi! may i ask you why have you chosen not to receive signs from your gods and keep the worship one-sided? it's an interesting view of the divine and i have never seen anyone else on tumblr with similar principles
hey nonny! thanks for sending an ask, i love talking about my practice and beliefs lol
so, first and foremost i am agnostic and a skeptic. i believe that we have no way of knowing the gods' realness, but no way of disproving it either. if the gods are not real, the feelings associated with ritual and worship still are: i believe the gods are all real, as long as they are worshiped, because the simple act of worshiping them gives them power over one's life.
ex. aphrodite is real to me, even beyond 'realness', because i interact with her and her domains through the lens that she is real. through my self-love journey, i pray to her in many aspects [as a trans person, as an aroace person, as a queer person, as a kid who is unsure of themself]. i offer to her, i speak to her, and i begin to view the world with more love and beauty.
i could be bringing this love and beauty into my life myself, by interacting with these aspects and having them fill my subconscious more. or, she could be bringing the love and beauty into my life because i pray and offer to her.
either way, i cannot prove or disprove how much she has to do with these things, but the act of worshiping her and following her guidance has been useful, has changed my life.
in antiquity, to hear the gods' words, people went to oracles, seers, etc. these oracles served a very specific purpose within the temple, cult, and worship; though anyone now can practice divination and deity communication, i tend to rely more on faith and the assumption that the kharis i build will have my prayers answered.
i do not pray for large things, simply because i do not believe that i have the power to convince the gods to change or create large things for me. i pray to the gods and their domains for guidance and introspection; i love them to death, and they guide me on my journeys, but more so because i interact with them as archetypes and i try to work their ideals into my life.
but secondly, i have seen far too many posts [here and in many other places] and heard far too many other polytheists claim that every little thing must be a sign before they even consider the mundane. i think a lot of people can easily confuse associations for signs; if i see a flock of doves, i'm not immediately assuming aphrodite has specifically chosen to send them to me, but i may smile and think of her. there can be [and there is!] magical in the mundane, but that does not mean that everything is only magical.
i'm never going to tell anyone that they are wrong for their own practice, journey, and faith [unless it's like actually dangerous or appropriative], but i have just chosen a different route. i question the divine all the time, and this has led me to genuinely being closer to them in many aspects.
now, this isn't to say i've never felt that i received a sign from a god. i'm not going to get into the specifics of that now, but what i try to do is practice critical thinking. i want to ensure that i'm being safe in the way i interact with faith and the divine, because i think if i'm not, someone can take advantage of that. and by not seeking signs or messages, by viewing everything with the mundane lens first, i am keeping myself safe.
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*It seems you managed to stumble across a unique trio...
Decided to do a silly lil doodle of my favorite Dopple-trio! :D on the surface I feel like this'd be a daily occurrence. Kale is the most normal of the 3 of them, but I wanted to draw her and Paps having a cute lil conversation. (More ideas below the cut!!!)
Pretender regularly interacts with humans (his disguise slowly recovers, and he continues to mostly abstain from his old habits) and usually appears as "human" as long as he's out. Sometimes in public I feel like ppl would be willing to talk to him, and he's always quick to make it clear that to get to his family people would have to get past him. (Also I think in their neighborhood/town everyone gets increasingly confused because he regularly goes, "Yeah, that's my Kid" some days abd other days he's like, "That's my little sibling" and it's just that he's her guardian and the terms are kinda interchangeable because it's easier to use them than explain the whole situation lol)
Pretender also has no sense of fashion. He's always so close to a neat outfit then takes the wrong turn before he exits his closet lol.
Paps stays in skeleton form (at least for the first few years) even tho it's dangerous, because his human disguise is awful and makes K uncomfortable. Instead he trains genuinely with Undyne and Tender to properly figure out a human shape over about 4 years. Eventually he does have a human disguise, but he's contented in his monster form too.
K I can't say a lot for (beloved @oodlesndoodles is who designed/owns her!) But I'm pretty certain that she'd probably still wear her one monster-style outfit sometimes if only to show her solidarity with her family, or just to mess with people on the streets 🙏
Also:
I love the idea that someone talking to them would take in this info and be like ???????
Last Notes: Human!Pretender is one of my favorite blorbos ever to doodle! His hair texture is probably the most satisfying thing ever! Paps keeps miraculously looking good for this AU??? I've never been able to draw Papyrus before??? Idk what changed, but I love him! And KALE! K my beloved I have struggled so hard to doodle her well and usually fail but I think I did it!!! I love her sm...
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