#does not exist in my brain holy SHIT

[eggsistential-basket]

my brother in fuck I remember how to rotate a min max heap but I forgot what an ARRAY in JAVA is ic kl;dJZS:SACK JDH CNKSLADJA:LJ<HNCKASLJ DHSLFIJ:V vfdjLSjvf; lk

[passerinesoncaffeine]

GOD. I AM OBSESSED WITH HIM.

[rigaudon]

You know what, actually, I'm gonna comment on the original post rather than just venting my annoyance in my own blog. Holy shit guys, the entire community needs to collectively chill out and stop jumping to conclusions and regurgitating them until half the site is parroting back misinformation that takes months (or, realistically, never) to correct.

there's already half a dozen optional dashboard tabs in tumblr labs. In addition to the normal following/for you/tracked tags at the top of your dash. The keyword here being optional. You can use as many of them as you want, or none! If you want them, they're in a new tab that has no effect on your chronological dash. If you don't want them, keep them off and they won't even show up at the top to annoy you!

Like c'mon guys. I get that it's on brand for tumblr to push back against any changes @staff make to the site, but we really need to be better about not assuming the worst possible scenario and dog piling on it until the whole site is in a frenzy over something that isn't even true.

Please, I'm begging you, exercise your critical thinking skills and look into how the site already functions before writing 2k word essays on how staff is 100% For Real Taking away the chronological dashboard. You're just making yourselves mad over literally nothing.

Tumblr’s Core Product Strategy

Here at Tumblr, we’ve been working hard on reorganizing how we work in a bid to gain more users. A larger user base means a more sustainable company, and means we get to stick around and do this thing with you all a bit longer. What follows is the strategy we're using to accomplish the goal of user growth. The @labs group has published a bit already, but this is bigger. We’re publishing it publicly for the first time, in an effort to work more transparently with all of you in the Tumblr community. This strategy provides guidance amid limited resources, allowing our teams to focus on specific key areas to ensure Tumblr’s future.

The Diagnosis

In order for Tumblr to grow, we need to fix the core experience that makes Tumblr a useful place for users. The underlying problem is that Tumblr is not easy to use. Historically, we have expected users to curate their feeds and lean into curating their experience. But this expectation introduces friction to the user experience and only serves a small portion of our audience. 

Tumblr’s competitive advantage lies in its unique content and vibrant communities. As the forerunner of internet culture, Tumblr encompasses a wide range of interests, such as entertainment, art, gaming, fandom, fashion, and music. People come to Tumblr to immerse themselves in this culture, making it essential for us to ensure a seamless connection between people and content. 

To guarantee Tumblr’s continued success, we’ve got to prioritize fostering that seamless connection between people and content. This involves attracting and retaining new users and creators, nurturing their growth, and encouraging frequent engagement with the platform.

Our Guiding Principles

To enhance Tumblr’s usability, we must address these core guiding principles.

Expand the ways new users can discover and sign up for Tumblr.

Provide high-quality content with every app launch.

Facilitate easier user participation in conversations.

Retain and grow our creator base.

Create patterns that encourage users to keep returning to Tumblr.

Improve the platform’s performance, stability, and quality.

Below is a deep dive into each of these principles.

Principle 1: Expand the ways new users can discover and sign up for Tumblr.

Tumblr has a “top of the funnel” issue in converting non-users into engaged logged-in users. We also have not invested in industry standard SEO practices to ensure a robust top of the funnel. The referral traffic that we do get from external sources is dispersed across different pages with inconsistent user experiences, which results in a missed opportunity to convert these users into regular Tumblr users. For example, users from search engines often land on pages within the blog network and blog view—where there isn’t much of a reason to sign up. 

We need to experiment with logged-out tumblr.com to ensure we are capturing the highest potential conversion rate for visitors into sign-ups and log-ins. We might want to explore showing the potential future user the full breadth of content that Tumblr has to offer on our logged-out pages. We want people to be able to easily understand the potential behind Tumblr without having to navigate multiple tabs and pages to figure it out. Our current logged-out explore page does very little to help users understand “what is Tumblr.” which is a missed opportunity to get people excited about joining the site.

Actions & Next Steps

Improving Tumblr’s search engine optimization (SEO) practices to be in line with industry standards.

Experiment with logged out tumblr.com to achieve the highest conversion rate for sign-ups and log-ins, explore ways for visitors to “get” Tumblr and entice them to sign up.

Principle 2: Provide high-quality content with every app launch.

We need to ensure the highest quality user experience by presenting fresh and relevant content tailored to the user’s diverse interests during each session. If the user has a bad content experience, the fault lies with the product.

The default position should always be that the user does not know how to navigate the application. Additionally, we need to ensure that when people search for content related to their interests, it is easily accessible without any confusing limitations or unexpected roadblocks in their journey.

Being a 15-year-old brand is tough because the brand carries the baggage of a person’s preconceived impressions of Tumblr. On average, a user only sees 25 posts per session, so the first 25 posts have to convey the value of Tumblr: it is a vibrant community with lots of untapped potential. We never want to leave the user believing that Tumblr is a place that is stale and not relevant. 

Actions & Next Steps

Deliver great content each time the app is opened.

Make it easier for users to understand where the vibrant communities on Tumblr are. 

Improve our algorithmic ranking capabilities across all feeds. 

Principle 3: Facilitate easier user participation in conversations.

Part of Tumblr’s charm lies in its capacity to showcase the evolution of conversations and the clever remarks found within reblog chains and replies. Engaging in these discussions should be enjoyable and effortless.

Unfortunately, the current way that conversations work on Tumblr across replies and reblogs is confusing for new users. The limitations around engaging with individual reblogs, replies only applying to the original post, and the inability to easily follow threaded conversations make it difficult for users to join the conversation.

Actions & Next Steps

Address the confusion within replies and reblogs.

Improve the conversational posting features around replies and reblogs. 

Allow engagements on individual replies and reblogs.

Make it easier for users to follow the various conversation paths within a reblog thread. 

Remove clutter in the conversation by collapsing reblog threads. 

Explore the feasibility of removing duplicate reblogs within a user’s Following feed. 

Principle 4: Retain and grow our creator base.

Creators are essential to the Tumblr community. However, we haven’t always had a consistent and coordinated effort around retaining, nurturing, and growing our creator base.  

Being a new creator on Tumblr can be intimidating, with a high likelihood of leaving or disappointment upon sharing creations without receiving engagement or feedback. We need to ensure that we have the expected creator tools and foster the rewarding feedback loops that keep creators around and enable them to thrive.

The lack of feedback stems from the outdated decision to only show content from followed blogs on the main dashboard feed (“Following”), perpetuating a cycle where popular blogs continue to gain more visibility at the expense of helping new creators. To address this, we need to prioritize supporting and nurturing the growth of new creators on the platform.

It is also imperative that creators, like everyone on Tumblr, feel safe and in control of their experience. Whether it be an ask from the community or engagement on a post, being successful on Tumblr should never feel like a punishing experience.

Actions & Next Steps

Get creators’ new content in front of people who are interested in it. 

Improve the feedback loop for creators, incentivizing them to continue posting.

Build mechanisms to protect creators from being spammed by notifications when they go viral.

Expand ways to co-create content, such as by adding the capability to embed Tumblr links in posts.

Principle 5: Create patterns that encourage users to keep returning to Tumblr.

Push notifications and emails are essential tools to increase user engagement, improve user retention, and facilitate content discovery. Our strategy of reaching out to you, the user, should be well-coordinated across product, commercial, and marketing teams.

Our messaging strategy needs to be personalized and adapt to a user’s shifting interests. Our messages should keep users in the know on the latest activity in their community, as well as keeping Tumblr top of mind as the place to go for witty takes and remixes of the latest shows and real-life events.  

Most importantly, our messages should be thoughtful and should never come across as spammy.  

Actions & Next Steps

Conduct an audit of our messaging strategy.

Address the issue of notifications getting too noisy; throttle, collapse or mute notifications where necessary.  

Identify opportunities for personalization within our email messages. 

Test what the right daily push notification limit is. 

Send emails when a user has push notifications switched off.

Principle 6: Performance, stability and quality.

The stability and performance of our mobile apps have declined. There is a large backlog of production issues, with more bugs created than resolved over the last 300 days. If this continues, roughly one new unresolved production issue will be created every two days. Apps and backend systems that work well and don't crash are the foundation of a great Tumblr experience. Improving performance, stability, and quality will help us achieve sustainable operations for Tumblr.

Improve performance and stability: deliver crash-free, responsive, and fast-loading apps on Android, iOS, and web.

Improve quality: deliver the highest quality Tumblr experience to our users. 

Move faster: provide APIs and services to unblock core product initiatives and launch new features coming out of Labs.

Conclusion

Our mission has always been to empower the world’s creators. We are wholly committed to ensuring Tumblr evolves in a way that supports our current users while improving areas that attract new creators, artists, and users. You deserve a digital home that works for you. You deserve the best tools and features to connect with your communities on a platform that prioritizes the easy discoverability of high-quality content. This is an invigorating time for Tumblr, and we couldn’t be more excited about our current strategy.

[cosmic-dust-poltergeist]

Another Clone Danny x batfam au, Danny was also full dead before he's shoved into a clone body, but it's not really relevant in this part.

[Pt2: here]

Danny isn't a hundred percent sure how he got here. Last thing he remembered was running away from the GIW and his parents. They got a lucky shot on him, and he was losing ectoplasum fast. He's pretty sure he was about to fully End. He remembers being mildly amused over his parents' inventions killing him twice, before it all goes dark.

He woke up as a baby. A clone baby by the looks of his environment, an underground lab(?). His creator(?) is staring at him as if he's a miracle, and given the fancy sci-fi screen thingy (a tablet? Or ipad? He's not sure how he knows these terms) in front of the cloning tank say "attempt 99", he probably is this guy's miracle.

Danny doesn't see anyone else around, and this guy, a teenager about Jazz's age (?), seems happy on a personal level to see Danny wiggling in the tank. So it's not likely he was forced to do this. Whatever this is..

"I did it...? Holy shit! I did it!" The teen cheers before freezing, "I'm a parent now.. I did not think this through... welp, I'm a parent now."

The guy checks his vitals before draining the tank. Danny is handled as if he's the most precious, yet breakable thing in the world to this kid.

"Hello, I'm Tim, your dad, I guess." The kid, Tim, introduces himself, and Danny giggles at him because if Danny was a normal baby, he'd have no idea what he was saying. "You're the clone of my dead best friend. He was half kryptonian. I promise to do my best to help you learn your powers and culture. I'll break into Clark's ice fortress if I have to to do it."

Danny has no idea what any of that means, but Tim seems determined, so Danny isn't too worried. He's more worried about the power thing. Are they going to be completely different from his old ones? Does he still have access to his ghost powers?

His little baby body can't handle his big emotions, and he starts crying. Tim panics, checking for mess, before realizing he doesn't have baby supplies. He clearly didn't think his cloning attempt would work with how unprepared he is. And that's valid if Danny really is his 99th attempt.

Tim bundles Danny up and rushes them to the nearest store that has baby supplies. Danny is clothed and fed promptly and given a wolf plushy. Danny isn't sure about the wolf thing, but the stuffie does sooth his baby instincts, so he rolls with it.

"Alright, baby. I... I didn't think of a name for you. I originally was trying to make a clone closer to Kon's age and figured they could name themselves, like Kon did." Tim sighs, slightly rocking Danny in his arms. "Man, I must seem insane talking to a baby. A baby I made because I couldn't deal with one more person in my life being dead or gone."

Danny notes the interesting wording.

"Okay. Can you understand me at all? I forgot to adjust the knowledge download to a year old's level, but that doesn't mean your baby brain absorbed any of the info."

Ooooh, that explains why he knows things that didn't exist where he's from.

Danny blows spit bubbles and attempts to nod. It's a bit hard, his baby muscles not developed enough for the action. Tim understands, though.

"Okay, okay." Tim looking both scared and relieved. "How about you pat me once for yes and twice for no? At least for now. I don't want you to hurt yourself."

Danny lightly smacks a hand to Tim's face. They both giggle over it.

"Alright, so I'm going to list off names, and you can tell me yes or no, okay?" One pat. "Okay, let's see."

Danny wonders if he can get a new name that can still let him have Danny as a nickname.

"Jasper" No

"Darin" No

"Dugu" No??

"Presh?" No! Tim? Where are you getting these names??

"Ratan" No

"Cicil" No

"Matthew" No

"Theo?" No

"Alihan" No

"Atiya" Nope

"Tesher" No

"Senai" No

"Uuum... Habwat?" No

"Geoffrey" No

"Amari?" Nope

"Jordan" ... huh, technically could get Danny from that, but still. No.

"Riley?" No

"Drew?" Nope

"Nova" Oooo so tempting, but no

"Esteban" Nope

"Izar" No

"Aedan?" You know what, good enough. That's Danny's new name.

Tim looks misty eyed when Danny finally agrees to a name.

"Alright, welcome to the world, Aedan Drake." Danny blows bubbles at him. "We'll visit adding Kent and getting you a proper kryptonian name when you can actually speak and understand what those names mean. Kon's human name was Conner Kent, and his kryptonian name was Kon-El. It translates to abomination of the house of El. He was a clone of Kal-El and wasn't treated well for it. I won't let the Els treat you as they treated him."

Tim looks pissed on his friend's behalf and cradles Danny protectively.

"The Els don't matter anyways. You will always be a Drake. And Drakes protect what they claim with viciousness." He kisses Danny's forehead. He then moves to the fanciest computer Danny has ever seen, and with the hand not supporting Danny's body, starts designing what appears to be a bulletproof and stabproof baby carrier. "I should have waited til after I finish hunting for clues to get Bruce, he's my adoptive father, out of the timestream. My siblings think I'm crazy, which creating a clone isn't helping my case over, but I know he's alive. I found evidence, just not enough to prove it to them."

Danny starts nodding off. Tim's ramblings are soothing and his hold gentle, Danny's tiny baby body doesn't stand a chance at staying awake. He's sad he's missing out on all the dad lore because of it.

Once the carrier is ready, Tim starts going out and taking Danny with him. Danny is actually pretty safe on these outings. The carrier is bulletproof, stabproof, has tinted bulletproof glass so Danny can get sun without people seeing him, it's temperature controlled, well ventilated, and has plenty of cushion. Seriously, Danny is sure the whole thing is like 60 pounds with him in it, but Tim gives zero fucks. He's determined to keep Danny safe.

It's super touching. And Danny swears to one day return the favour. The day is closer than he thinks when a creepy old fucker crawls out of the woodworks. Danny hates him instantly. Tim explaining the creep's relation to Tim's family doesn't change Danny's mind. In fact, it probably makes his opinion on this Ra's Al Gul even worse. And once he sees how that pedo looks at his sweet new dad, he plans to be an absolute menace.

[dwaekkicidal]

Toys with Han

wc» ~900

cw» not really proofread, fem!reader, sex toy usage, vibrators (m & f receiving), mentions of unprotected p in v, mentions of multiple rounds + overstim, i think thats it?

an» for u my 🥢 anon <3 i wanted to write out ji's so ill do that hehe

'Toys' Masterlist

DO NOT republish or translate+post my work!

His favorite: Hitachi wand.

Hannie looooves this toy, and it’s mainly because both of you can use it!! Either on each other or on yourselves~ But boy does he love fucking your brains out while using it on you…

“J-Ji!”

“That’s right pretty, cry my name more~” His hips roll into you perfectly as your knees try their best to close around his small waist. He grunts and pushes the fat tip of the vibrator harder against your clit and times it with a particularly hard thrust. “Ah-ah, be good for me, mamas.” Your nails can’t help but dig further into his forearm and the sheets as you feel another orgasm building up.

Each one has been more intense than the last, and you can feel your conscience slipping from you as this one takes the cake for being the strongest. You shake aggressively under him and feel your eyes roll into the back of your skull as you gush around him. It’s not quite enough for you to realize that you’re squirting right away, but it’s just enough for him to realize and fuck you harder through it, sending himself through his own orgasm.

“Holy shit, baby!” He laughs and throws the toy to the side, not bothering to turn it off before he pulls out. He jerks himself off fast and uses his free hand to rub back and forth on your cunt, making your release splatter all over your legs and onto his arm. You vaguely hear some more comments before you feel him cum on your stomach, some of it landing right where his hand caresses your damp thigh.

Your chest is still heaving by the time you’ve even slightly calmed down, but Han has already turned the vibrator off and is hovering above you, leaving featherlight kisses along your face. They trail down until he’s at your jaw, where he nibbles lightly and whines, “That was so fucking hot…” You can feel his cock already twitching back to life against your thigh.

“I wanna go again, honey... Can you handle more?” You shake your head fervently and he hums alongside a laugh.

Once you’ve returned to this plane of existence, you push him off of you, interrupting his kisses and getting complaints in response. He continues to whine until you climb on top of him and straddle his thighs, then he smirks up at you and tilts his head playfully. His equally playful “Yeah?” makes your head spin and you quickly hush him with a kiss. Just one short enough to distract him and allow you to reach for the tossed, turned-off vibrator.

The way he doesn’t notice right off the bat is enough to almost make you laugh, he was so caught up with sticking his tongue down your throat that he didn’t hear the buzzing start up again. It wasn’t until you slid it between the two of you that he noticed, and by the time that happened it was already too late. You wrapped a hand around his base to hold him still as your other hand lightly traced the vibrator up and down his length at the lowest speed.

His eyebrows furrow and he short circuits- he stopped moving his lips completely as his jaw dropped in the middle of the kiss. You were so close that you could hear each time his breath caught in his lungs, and it only egged you on further. It was your turn to make him the mess, and you quickly took advantage of him being distracted by licking a long stripe down his neck.

“Jagi…” His voice was shaky but he still tilted his head to the side for you to have more room to work with, almost instinctively. You simply hum in response and turn it up a notch, frowning into his neck when you realize he’s biting down on his lip. “Hey. I was good for you, why can’t you be good for me now?” You bite down on his neck to prove ur point and he finally caves, releasing his swollen lips with a shaky exhale that turns into a moan when you press the vibrator to his tip.

“My baby… Ffuck- ‘ma cum.” He swallows the drool pooling in his mouth and starts thrusting his hips towards you, pushing the vibrator down his shaft on his own. His jaw drops into a loud gasp and his eyes squeeze shut as you tsk and trace the tip of the vibrator in circles around his tip, sometimes adding extra pressure to tease him further. Your lips latch onto his neck and you suck dark marks into his Adam's apple.

“Cum for me, please~” Your voice is low against his neck, making him shiver as he feels his orgasm on its cusp. What finally sends him over the edge is when you crane your neck down more and lick a circle around his nipple, biting down just under his tattoo where his skin was beautiful but unmarked.

You look up in time to see his gaze land on you. His eyes are dark and lidded but you can see the fire in them as he growls and paints your hand and his stomach in his cum. His eyes narrow further as you giggle and lay down to lick up his stomach, cleaning him up while intentionally riling him up again. You don’t turn the vibrator off, only turning it down to the lowest setting before you ghost it at his base.

“C’mon, Daddy. You can do it again~”

Taglist: (red=can't be tagged)

@valkyriexo @lunearta @jabmastersupriseee @rylea08

@yaorzu-blog @amararosesblog @jiminssluttyminx @clemissleepy

@miss-daisy04 @kittyxnoa @dwaekkiiracha @bubblerizz

@mariteez @fun-fanfics @honeyybbuubblleess @kittycatkrissa

@nicora04 @chuuyaobsessed @moonlightndaydreams

@aeri-skzver

[000000-000000-000000]

I would love to see your headcanons for who's the most to least likely to sub for their partner! Whatever characters of your choice <3

hii!! this was honestly so fun to write :P these lowkey are kind of like a scenario split into hcs, idk why but that's just how my brain decided to go about it lol.

they're in order from most to least likely to sub :P also the prompt i worked with as a base for these is basically the reader bringing it up to them while in a relationship. i found it worked better than just writing who would do it voluntarily (because they wouldn't i'm afraid 💀). also also, gn partner!

enjoy!! <3

Creepypasta Submissive Headcanons (NSFW)

CW: dom/sub dynamics, a bit of brat taming?, degradation, a bit of bondage, spit, orgasm control/edging, dubcon at the end, oral (giving and receiving for both the characters and the reader), slight mention of trauma but nothing explicit

BEN Drowned

모 sex with him is generally you centric because he's always geeked off that grass and uses that as an excuse to be lazy and lay back while you ride his face and use his dick—he gets off anyway, so might as well let you do the work under the pretense of "Yeah babe you can use me, empowerment or whatever."

모 so when you bring up domming him, he doesn't even think twice about it. goes into it thinking it's just regular sex but on steroids. not because he's blind to what it means—he's been inside the internet, he's seen shit—but because it's you. and what will you do.

모 there would be a tiny brat-dom dynamic by default because, yeah he's down for whatever you bring up, but he cannot take it fully seriously. kind of difficult to do that when you're baked like a pastry.

모 you want him to address you with a superior nickname? "yes ma'am/sir/master" but he's rolling his eyes and sporting a shit eating grin the entire time because he thinks it's comical.

모 you demand that he doesn't jerk off unless you tell him to? definitely does it when he's nose deep between your legs just to see what you do about it. "What?? It's muscle memory babe, don't pretend it's not hot."

모 genuinely huffing and puffing if you tied his hands behind his back and edged him as punishment. talking shit up until the point he's twitching and rutting in the air when you stop touching him. then it's:

"Holy shit, OKAY I'm sorry, fuck, I'm sorry, just— babe-master, I'm getting dick cramps, come on,"

모 refuses to beg for about 10 seconds total. the moment you tease him again, "Ohhh my fucking god, please fuck me, please, I can't take this anymore, PLEASE make me cum".

모 balls deep inside you and choking on mindless thanks, making these broken, indignant whines if you told him to slow down.

모 all in all, however, he would be into it more than he expected. it doesn't become default freaky time because he does not have that kind of energy, but when it happens again, he'd lay off the brattiness.

모 aftercare is basically non-existent. he doesn't need it, he would just spark up again and hop on the game, but if you felt like you needed it, it would be more quality time than cuddles.

Toby Rodgers

𓌏 he's lowkey a closeted switch disguised as a feral fuck machine so when you bring it up he gets lowkey defensive, he feels CLOCKED.

𓌏 "What, s-so I don't fuh-fuck you good? That it?" "Is this a con-control thing? You want a-an excuse t-to bully me?" full 7 stages of grief like huh?

𓌏 eventually agrees grudgingly which, in other words, means he was fiending for this shit forever but he never surpassed preteen emotional maturity. so, coming to terms with being bossed around was a project in erosion (thanks Slender).

𓌏 he's acting like a stray dog at first, defenses up so high that you have to break character and remind him it's still just you and if he doesn't like something he can just tell you. didn't even establish a safe word because you thought this was going to fail from the start.

𓌏 it takes approximately 5 minutes of you easing him into it with gentle authority assertion until he melts and starts begging, just like that. you're half-way into calling him a good boy for making eye contact when you asked, and he's already whining.

𓌏 you specifically avoid degradation because you don't wanna push it. however, "Are you gonna be a good boy and stay still while I suck you off?" is exactly the moment where the puzzle pieces fall into place for him.

𓌏 "Yes, I'll— f-fuck I'll be the b-best fucking slut f-for you, please," oh okay. i thought we were— alright??

𓌏 barely a decent slut for you, canNOT stay still, but he tries. kind of. hips thrusting up too excitedly, cockhead ramming so hard in the back of your throat that you basically feel the bruise forming in real time. "S-shit, fuck, I'm sorry— I-I'm sorry, it's a t-tic, please d-don't stop." lies.

𓌏 quickly discovers he likes begging with his mouth full. your fingers, your underwear, you, anything. choking on messy “pl-please, c’n I cum, I’ll be g-good, I swear", so needy you would confuse his pleas for the begging of his victims.

𓌏 hot take or not, slight mommy/daddy kink. obvious reasons.

𓌏 so obnoxiously loud when you start degrading him. "You're that much of a worthless mutt? You can't even take what I give you and you're expecting me to let you cum?" groaning, whining, eyes glassy and mouth snarling like he's in pain, voice cracking when you have a hand around his throat, or a foot on his chest.

𓌏 when you finally let him cum, he sobs actual tears. voice breaking and wheezing from how begging in guttural groans scratched his throat the entire time. spit dripping down his neck from the gash in his cheek. whole body convulsing and tics flaring up like crazy. you can barely even hear the thanks he whispers breathlessly.

𓌏 so quick to clean his cum out of you if you asked.

𓌏 aftercare consists of him completely limp on top of you while you detangle his sweaty hair, muttering little praises in his ear, which he petulantly grunts away like you didn't just reduce him to whimpering mush.

Eyeless Jack

⚉ he's a predator by nature, so subbing isn't exactly something that's ever crossed his mind. but the thing with Jack is, he doesn't just do relationships. if you're partners, you're really fucking special to him, and by proxy he would jump into it just because he's devoted. so, your answer would be a short, certain "...Alright."

⚉ he's surprisingly a very good sport about it. the second you put your hand on his chest and push him down, he goes easy. obedient. no passive aggressiveness, no brattiness, no "I could flip this on you so quick". he just watches you from where he's propped up on his elbows with this unreadable expression like he's waiting for you to take him apart and it doesn’t even bruise his pride.

⚉ doesn’t beg, doesn’t whimper, doesn’t plead. but the second you tell him to stay still and open his mouth, he does. you’ll straddle his chest and he just tilts his head back, mouth parting obediently, waiting for your fingers, your taste, anything.

⚉ he'll sit and take whatever you give him, answers everything with short, respectful answers like it's something sacred. "You like being used, big boy?" "Yes, ma'am/sir." the only sign he’s into it is how fucking hard he gets from just serving you.

⚉ at one point you slap his hand away when he tries to jerk off without permission and he just freezes. like a dog being told to stay. stares at you with wide sockets and says, “...Apologies.” voice low, like it’s actually sincere.

⚉ takes edging mostly unphased, only grunting when you stop to watch his leaking cock twitch helplessly on his stomach. the restraint is borderline terrifying. HOWEVER, by the 5th, 6th time, he's panting, thighs shaking, hips thrusting in the air purely out of instinct.

⚉ you tie his wrists behind his back just for fun, and the moment you straddle him, his whole body tenses like a loaded weapon. he doesn't dare move until you tell him to. when you finally lean back and put your hands on his knees for leverage while riding him—bouncing, relentless—he jerks his hands against the ties, teeth bared in a hiss.

⚉ doesn't need praise, didn't react to it the entire time, but the moment you start huffing out little "so big, so obedient, such a good fucking toy for me" while he's balls deep inside you, his chest ruptures with a growl.

⚉ the only real, shaken reaction you'll get out of him is when you give him permission to cum. chokes on a growl, snarls "yes, fuck yes, yes—" through gritted teeth and starts pistoning into you from below.

⚉ doesn't need aftercare, but he just lays there with you like he’s resting after a blood ritual. no words. no movement. you curl into him and he shifts just enough to wrap an arm around your waist. breathes in slow, reverent, like he’d let you kill him if you wanted.

Brian Thomas

☹ bringing it up to him in a conversation would go south quickly. sex with him generally feels impersonal and more like a vessel for frustration, regardless of how long you have been together. letting his guard down is off the table.

☹ unless you manage to sneak it into the rare instance where he's allowing himself to relax just enough to soften a bit. where he kisses you slowly while stroking your back under the covers and his body succumbs to your gentleness, instead of crashing his mouth into yours with clenched teeth and shoving his hand in your underwear like fucking you as urgently as possible would take the weight off his shoulders.

☹ starting slow would be the best course of action. gently guiding his face to the side to drag your lips down his neck, feeling him through his shirt while whispering into his skin. "Relax, let me take care of you", "Let me take these off, baby", "Lift your hips for me."

☹ looks at you with these wary eyes and parted lips like he's so torn. but he lets you. lets you undress him, lets you get on top of him to kiss down his chest, down his stomach. lets you lick up his shaft instead of grabbing your hair and guiding you to take him in your mouth right off the bat. even fights himself to keep still and not rush you when you start teasing him.

☹ "So good for me, baby" while stroking from the base up and licking around his tip? he whimpers. genuine, meek, like that's enough to crack him open.

☹ hands will eventually fly to your hair on instinct. you'll grab his wrists and set them down back at his sides, not forcing them down but just holding your hands over them to remind. he wouldn't squirm, but he would tense. and "be a good boy for me and i'll give you what you want, okay?" is enough to get him biting his lip and breathe harder.

☹ the more you give, the more he gives back like it's natural. you take him deeper, relax your throat and let his cock slide down slowly, he groans so deep you can barely hear the "fffuck yes, thank you," but it's there. small and new and unsure, but coming out without resistance.

☹ praise, for anything and everything, and he melts into a puddle of breathy moans and shaking thighs. "Look at you, you look so fucking good on your knees for me" and his eyes would roll back in a muffled whine.

☹ surprisingly self controlled when you tell him just how to fuck you, but he's panting in your ear like it's painful not to pound into you when you keep him moving slowly. "F-fuck, you're so tight, please, just a bit... just— let me fuck you proper, please."

☹ does NOT take edging easily. crumbling by the second time he starts getting close, bucking up into your hand and sweating bullets.

☹ looks damaged when you let him cum. eyes wide, brows pinched together tightly, mouth wide open and slack and nothing coming out, like you punched the air out of his lungs.

☹ aftercare is silent and sticky with tight hugs and noses buried in each other's shoulders. won't say it out loud in a million years, but it felt cathartic.

Tim Wright

⦻ takes a LOT of convincing, a lot of reasoning, you even almost resort to making a google slideshow for him. however, it's clear from the get go he's not fully opposed to it with the way he's smirking every time you start your "hear me out" rant. he just wants to watch you reason with him just to fuck with you a little. mind games™

⦻ agrees EVENTUALLY. and he's deceptively composed when he gets on his knees for you. deceptive little grin when you spread your legs and pull him in. something's wrong.

⦻ "Tim." "What?? I'm on my knees, no? Ain't you supposed to call me a good boy?" before he dives in with his entire mouth right away. latches on and sucks like he's trying to prove something.

⦻ "Hm? Easier? Should've specified." "Maybe you should get rougher with me so I listen. C'mon, you wanted this, do I have to teach you?"

⦻ you do get rougher. yank him off you by the hair, hold him there and jerk his head while you scold him. he just looks up at you with low eyes and a sharp, toothy grin, like he's completely unphased by the sting but loving you getting riled up.

⦻ makes a show of jacking off after you specifically demanded that he doesn't, moaning a little extra when you slap his hand off his dick. "Shit, yeah, punish me baby, I've been sooo bad. Maybe you should tie me up too."

⦻ ends up cuffed for maybe 5 minutes while you alternate between fisting his cock and slapping it, before he somehow he ends up out of the restraint—maybe he slipped his hands out because you didn't want to be cruel by tying them too tight and giving him rope burn on his wrists, maybe he just undid the knot while you were focused on keeping him on the edge. either way, you end up yanked on top of him mid "petulant fucking manwhore".

⦻ "Come on, is that it? You're giving up that easy?" gives you no chance whatsoever to stop him from shoving inside you from below. it quickly morphs into thrashing for who fucks who, half him sloppily thrusting into you, half you wrapping both hands around his neck and bouncing on his dick while snarling.

⦻ a mess of spit. yours in his mouth, his on your chest, wetting the sheets, somehow in your hair. he looks like he's thriving while you're genuinely frustrated that he flipped it on you.

⦻ "Tim, come on—!" "Come on? Oh, you want me to cum on you? Fuck, ain't you gonna make me beg for it first?" mockery on 100% even though his voice is shaking by the unforgiving way he just slams into you, just challenging you to keep talking, keep trying, keep failing.

⦻ ruined orgasm. you haul yourself up right when he's starting to grunt low and breathless in his throat, over and over like he does when he's close. actually gasps when he starts pulsating and throbbing angry spurts on his own stomach, cock spasming frustrated and his expression so shocked, like you were the traitor.

⦻ no aftercare, only because he's moping that it felt like shit. you're so proud, and underneath all that huffing and puffing, he is too. silently.

Jeff the Killer

꒷꒦ ...right.

꒷꒦ so, you bring it up to him one night, soft and careful and fully aware of how stupid of an idea this is. hands cold, eyes on the floor, voice so meek and shaky he actually goes "HUH?" 3 times before you actually spit it out.

"Have you, um... thought about, like... letting me be the one in charge...? Like, when we fuck?" instant regret.

꒷꒦ he barks at you. genuinely cackling, eyes bugging a little extra, like that was just so hilarious. you're already backpedaling because you know you should've just kept this in the vault and jerked off to it in private instead.

"You wanna dom me? Hilarious babe, fucking hysterical."

꒷꒦ flips it so fucking fast, you don't even have time to open your mouth before he's on you. hand on your throat so tight you can feel your pulse in your temples, eyes sharp and manic and pinning you down. "You wanna sit on my dick and boss me around? Are you out of your fucking mind, bitch?"

꒷꒦ shoves you down at his feet so you fall face down next to his shoes. yanks you up by the hair and slams his crotch into your face, keeping you there until you're clawing at his legs for air. fucks your throat raw like he's trying to shut you up forever, pinches your nose when you start choking as if to punish you for even conjuring up the thought of flipping the dynamic. "Dominant little whore can't take a fucking blowjob?"

꒷꒦ fucks you like he's correcting you, no prep, no lube (unless you count the spit from your mouth already on his dick). ass up, face pushed in the pillows by his foot on the back of your head.

꒷꒦ "You need to have the stupid fucked outta you? Huh? Say you're stupid. Say 'that was the stupidest shit I done ever said in my life'." "I'm— I'm sorry, I—" "Say it or I'll fucking beat it out of you."

꒷꒦ you do not bring it up again. or maybe you do.

[dontmixpaintinyourcoffee]

More of my favorite Prudes <3

Alright, left to right, top to bottom:

1. I just get the vibe that Grace has beef with Richie specifically but for no discernable reason ("Richie, the whole point is that it's in the dark!" + "No, this is where you GROW UP!") and the second the sentence popped into my head I had to draw it. Also consider how goddamn funny the image of Grace pulling bleach and gloves and a bone saw out of her backpack is because holy shit did she have a contingency plan

2. I think that Pete saw Ted as the coolest big brother in the world right up until the exact minute he introduced him to Steph and suddenly Ted had the power to be very embarrassing in front of Pete's friends. (He would be used to this, as this is standard older sibling shithead behavior, but he's never had friends for Ted to tease him in front of.) I do think the Spankoffski brothers are really interesting, especially with what an asshole Ted is. In Abstinence Camp Pete does seem to really look up to him. Ted does not hide the fact that he's a massive prick, so the fact that Pete sees him as a positive figure implies that he's one of the very few people that Ted actually tries to be a good person for. Makes a lot of sense too, the age gap between them is massive, so Pete has no way of knowing the kind of sleazy shit Ted does, he's just the cool older brother to him. Also heheheh I did the funny meme

3. All her brothers got one so I gave Webby a humansona. I don't know why she ended up looking like 90s Gwen Stacy but I kinda like it? I was going for classic straight-a student, not quite as frilly as Grace, but very academic and cute. I also think that Webby should be allowed to be a little cosmically horrifying as a treat (watching her casually fucking evaporate Willabella was so unnerving and cool, I would love more of that.) She lets herself be soft and gentle for Hannah's benefit, don't want to scare a little kid after all, but she exists far beyond those... Limitations.

4. Ok this one is highly inspired by a series of drawings by @samglyph , the concept of Ghost Ruth and Richie took my brain captive. So go show them some love!!!!!

[linddzz]

(regular disclaimer that I will exaggerate big feelings for effect but at the end of the day this is fandom and in the grand scheme of things Just Ain't That Serious good? good)

okok look while I am obviously SOOO into where Arcane went with the Machine/Arcane Herald, I can get why gamers who liked og LoL Viktor would be Big Annoyed at him being totally retconned and overhauled in game. That is undeniably a totally different guy there and yeah it would be shitty to have the guy you like completely swapped out. I can especially get it if they liked the mechanical cyborg engineering aspects of his character!

BU T I keep seeing iterations of "he didn't choose anything for himself he just had things happen to him" or "he just went mystic. he used to be someone who used his genius to remake himself and now he just meditated himself into a wizard" and I am so so down to meet in the pit on those takes!! I get people not liking the less mechanical aspects of him but hhhhhhohmygod do not be taking my guys agency and genius down like that

Yes the initial full fusing with the hexcore is something that happened to him, that someone who loved him maybe too much did to him (almost like Arcane has themes of people being launched down dark paths by things that happen to them beyond their control hMmMmmmmmm!!!) And btw I still hold that while his brain got changed by trauma (bc trauma DOES THAT) and the hexcore helped amplify and empower him leaning into his worst traits, after Jayce forced that initial fusion everything Viktor did was a choice.

But also!! Jayce used Viktor's notes. Viktor was the one who went down and got shimmer, who lied and experimented in secret. He stumbled into noticing the hexcore responding to biological material but then he pursued that avenue (because LIFE is a lot of stumbling into things and then deciding what to do from there), figured out what interdisciplinary collaborations he needed to make, figured out on his FIRST TRY what runes he would need to put where.

And while they don't lean into the mechanical engineering genius as much as the OG Viktor like...guys that's a software engineer with a big scoop of magic theorist on top of it (who then started a pivot into biomechanical arcane theory like THAT). He made a magic AI! Don't go telling me he didn't use his genius to become the Arcane Herald when he made a magic AI and then I got to watch the hexclaw grabbing and programming runes into spells like the coolest shit ever!!

That man figured out how to make Jayce's ideas into reality. He then used the scant knowledge of the arcane that still exists to figure out and recreate, using technology, what mages do by instinct. He made a MAGIC AI HOLY SHIT. Jayce is STILL referencing Viktor's rune theories to figure out the anomaly!!

He did not use the same type of genius to become the same type of Herald, but my guy invented being a technomancer so hard that he turned himself into a magical supercomputer and was so good at THAT that he made himself a robowizard god and I will not be hearing anything belittling how nuts that is!!

[spidermans-l-o-v-e-r]

✨Strawberries and Cream Presents✨: A Kinkmas mini episode

How The Grinch Stole Christmas

Pairing: Eddie Diaz x Reader

Word Count: 5k

Notes: Have y’all seen Mufasa yet? That movie is G O O D anyway I miss strawberries and cream just as much as y’all do I PROMISE. I’m working on it again and hoping to get da juices flowing 😤😤😤

You pull up to the front of the mansion and park the car, a big smile on your face as you turn to Eddie. You’d set up this entire little present for him for Christmas. He’d always done nice little things like this for you, and you felt like it was time to pay him back.

“Tada!!” You squeak excitedly and he jumps a little at your enthusiasm but bends forward to look out of the car anyway.

He stares at the large house in front of him, it’s gorgeous, more gorgeous than he’s ever seen in his life. He can hardly believe a place like this even exists in your snowy home state, but it does and he’s here and what the fuck. It’s even nicer than that one couple friend’s house he always takes you to.

“H-how did” His mouth is gaping as you giddily hop from the car and shut the door, going back to the trunk.

“How the heck can you afford this”

He knows it’s rude and he knows this was a present but he has to ask. Because this is Hollywood-level living- this is Kardashian-level living.

“A certain actor friend of yours helped me pull some strings! It’s ours for two whole weeks!”

“T-two? Two weeks?” His brain is melting as you drag the large suitcase over to his side of the car and go back for the others

“Yeah! I also happened to work things out with Bobby and we agree you need this time off. And the state agrees you need time off! So you were granted the time and boy am I taking advantage of this”

You drag two suitcases over before he finally realizes “Oh I should be helping” and gets out of the car, he grabs the suitcase from your hands and sets it on the ground

“Hey don’t worry I can-“ You’re cut off by him kissing you, he holds your face in his hands, pouring all his love and adoration into the kiss and your heart melts for him.

He pulls away slowly, kissing the tip of your nose and you chase after him, pecking his lips one more time.

“I love you, we should get married”

You wave the diamond ring on your finger in his face and smirk.

“We are silly, I’m wedding dress shopping while I’m here remember? Since the rest of my friends are here”

“Without Buck?” His hands are on your waist now and you roll your eyes, your cousin would have killed you had you not worked out that minor detail

“He’ll be here, he’s gonna be staying with us for three days and then he’s heading back. Oh and Maddie!”

“Yeah that sounds like him”

You both grab a couple of the bags and then you take Eddie’s hand, pulling him toward the house

“Come on!! If you think the outside is nice?? You have to see the rest”

He drops the bags at the door the second he steps in, you let go of his hand and start dragging them out of the way as he walks in with his jaw on the floor

“Holy shit- Hooooly shit” He just keeps repeating it as he spins around slowly, it’s like a mini villa, like the ones he would see when he visited his cousins in Mexico when he was younger. He reaches back blindly and takes your hand

“Come on I wanna look around!”

He drags you around the house with childlike enthusiasm, running from room to ornate room, there’s so much more space than he thought there would be, there’s even a pool outback.

The large arched windows in the last room let in a massive amount of the sunset, warming things up and Eddie takes your hands, pulling you over to the California King Size bed

“I wanna sleep in this one” He claims it, nuzzling your nose and you giggle, slipping your arms around his neck

“Okay, seems perfect to me! You wanna keep looking around? Maybe get unpacked and go to the store?”

“That,” He turns you around slowly, and picks your hips up, setting you on the bed “Sounds so boring”

He falls on top of you and you open your legs, letting him settle in between them with a sweet smile on your face

“We won’t have dinner” You play with his hair, your tone soft and soothing

“I can think of plenty of things to eat, two in particular”

“Eddie!” You squeak and laugh when he growls and bites your neck, you shove at his chest and he pins your hands to the bed, moaning exaggeratedly as he grinds his hips into yours. Your back arches a little bit, and he wraps his arms behind you, growling in your ear and sending a wave of sexual tension through your body.

You slap his butt like bongos and he snickers into your shoulder before rolling off of you. He spreads his arms and legs, making a snow angel in the sheets and you push off the bed and flop down across him.

“Eddieeee” you wriggle on top of him and he slaps your ass, making you yelp as he squeezes it

“Alright okay okay we’re going” He whines while you crawl off of him and he gets up, smacking your ass one more time before grabbing your waist and putting you over his shoulder

“To Target!”

Not that Eddie ever could, but he truly can’t get enough of you. You’re sat together on the fluffy brown couch. Your legs are in his lap, your back against the armrest and he’s got his arms around you, snuggling into you. He peppers little kisses all over your face and you blush, cupping his cheeks and kissing him softly.

“This is really amazing Sugar Cube,” He says into your neck as you run your fingers through his hair, combing it back.

“Hey, it's what you deserve” You kiss his forehead, resting your lips against it and he pulls away, looking up at you

“What about you huh? What about what you deserve?” He runs his hand down your thigh, squeezing gently and you shrug

“Look at this place!, I think it’s just as much a vacation for you as it is for me…besides, we finally just get to spend some time alone together. After….after what happened I feel like there’s never enough time with you”

Eddie smiles sadly, thinking about what you two had gone through a couple of years ago, something that had left a scar on both of you even if you’d learned to work past it, even if the nightmares had finally stopped.

“I know what you mean… sometimes I feel that way too, but… we can’t let it rule our lives. We’re okay now Sugar Cube”

He rests his forehead against yours and your eyelids flutter closed, taking in a deep breath. His cologne fills your senses, calming you embarrassingly quickly like it always does and you smile

“I know”

You sit comfortably in his lap, listening to him hum along to the song playing through the speakers, as he kisses your neck, leaving behind a pretty necklace in his path. He takes your wrist, his fingers sliding over your pulse and you look up at him, a soft smile on your face.

“Hi”

“Hi”

He looks at you, studying your face, all the little things about it that he’s come to love after all of this, he understood it- Nero’s obsession, understood why he couldn’t let her go. Because looking at you now? Your eyes sparkling with life, your heartbeat strong under his fingertips, that ring on your finger…

He’d do what Nero did too.

“Can I have this dance?”

He gets out from under you, standing in front of you and listening to the beginning notes of the song playing, he does a little bow and winks at you as he reaches out.

You shake your head, getting up and taking his outstretched hand, he twirls you into his arms, your back against his chest as you move your hips with his. His arm wraps around your waist, pulling you closer and you reach back, cupping his face. He smirks and puts his hand over yours, kissing from your palm to your shoulder, before taking your hand and spinning you away from him again.

You look at him, a lusty fire in your eyes as you come back to him, he slowly wraps your arms around his neck before sliding his hands down over your sides and holding your waist again.

You roll your hips against him, and he shakes his head pretending to be disappointed but grinds against you anyway, letting you feel the bulge in his pants.

“That’s not how you properly bachata, you know this corazòn” he playfully scolds you, sliding his hands down to your ass as you dance together

“Uh huh, you’re getting on me? Your form is terrible. This is my dance space,” you take a step back from him and gesture “And this is your dance space”

He yanks you back toward him and you squeal as you both go down to the floor,

“When was the last time we watched Dirty Dancing anyway??” He’s laid out on the floor and you’re in a little heap with him

“Me and Buck watched it like three weeks ago”

“You watched dirty dancing without me?!?!!”

“Oh no I think I hear the alarm for the pizza oh no, oh gosh, oh no”

You try and scramble away from him and he grabs your waist, letting you drag his body with you

“Oh my god let go!”

“You’re not getting away from me that easily!!! I can’t believe you guys would do that to me! After everything you both constantly put me through!”

“What’s that supposed to mean?!” You finally make it to the kitchen with his arms wrapped tightly around your leg.

“Two Buckleys?! Two and you’re asking me what I mean by that”

“Technically three if you count Maddie” You peek in the oven at the pizza, rubbing your hands together evilly

“It’s Maddie, she doesn’t count. She’s like, the least annoying”

“Have you met their parents?” You snicker as you grab the oven mitts and finally shake him off, he rolls away a little so you can open the oven

“I have. Wasn’t impressed, glad you three seem to have not gotten the short end of the stick”

You take the pizza out and set it on the stovetop before turning around and looking down at him

“You ready for dinner?”

“Doesn’t it have to cool?”

You walk around, standing on his toes and reaching for his hands

“Waiting for pizza to cool is for the we-“

You scream as he yanks you down on top of him and rolls over on you, holding himself up as he attacks you with kisses. Your protests are muffled by his lips until they eventually die down when you wrap your arms around his neck, kissing him back.

“Oh come on Sugar Cube… I think we can make a little time for it to cool…don’t you?”

You whimper softly as he rolls his hips against yours, grinding his clothed cock into you. He reaches down to pull down your leggings and you freeze, pushing him off you and pretending to karate chop him

“Hold up, wait, wait, wait, we can’t!! I’ve got a surprise!!”

He groans as he lays on his back, letting out a long sigh

“If you’re sure?”

“I’m sure!” You get up off the floor and he rubs his hands over his face, his cock straining clearly against his sweatpants.

“Not even just the tip?” He asks sweetly and you snort, laughing and helping him up

“Not even the tip, cowboy”

You wait until after dinner to put your little plan into action. You’re lying on Eddie on the couch as you watch Dirty Dancing, it’s just getting to the part where Baby finds Penny in the kitchen when you sit up, stretching a little and pausing the movie

“Hey, What’s up?” He asks quietly, setting his hands on your hips, and you grin, feeling the warmth of them seep into your skin.

“Oh, I’m just…I’m kinda cold” You shrug and he sits up, grabbing the blanket from the back of the couch

“We can cuddle more if you want, though you’re lying on me so I really don���t know how much closer we can get” He chuckles and you take the blanket, easing it from his hands.

“I had a better idea! If you’re up for it” You get off of him and step away, dropping your cozy leggings to reveal a simple red thong, Eddie’s jaw drops as he watches you take off your shirt, the matching bra has pretty white lace lining it.

“You’re like a really kinky Santa’s little helper aren’t you?”

You cackle and hold your sides, laughing at him as he gets up from the couch and walks toward you, you back up slowly, still snickering and he starts to walk faster.

“You’re making this not sexy!” You wheeze between laughs and he looks at you, his pretty brown eyes clouded with lust, a dangerous hue washing over them.

“No, I’m not. I love your laugh.” He says it…so sickly sweet it snaps you back to the way he’s walking, the slow, precise steps, his incredibly relaxed demeanor… how he’s very slowly starting to crouch down like he’s gonna pounce.

“E-Eddie?” You gulp, letting out a nervous little laugh “Whatcha doin'?”

“I’m just standing here Sugar Cube”

He is most definitely not just standing there.

“You know there’s uh- a part two right? It’s not just this?” You gesture to yourself, backing up faster and he follows right after you

“Oh?” He stalls a little and you take that as an opportunity to take a big step back

“Yup! There is absolutely most definitely a part two and if you’d just let me make it there alive, I can show you”

“By all means, lead the way” He winks at you with a flourish of his arms and you stare at him suspiciously before leading him through the house. He sheds his clothes along the way and your mouth waters at the idea of what you’re going to turn around to.

He watches you walk in front of him with a hungry gaze, biting his lip as your ass jiggles with each step… oh he could get used to this. You lead him outside, down the fancy stone stairs to the pool, it’s lit up beautifully as you walk him past it. He gets a teeny bit distracted by the fact that he’s absolutely doing laps in that pool tomorrow morning.

You walk down another set of stairs, stopping for a second to unclasp the front of your bra, you let it dangle from your finger before dropping it. You ease off the thong, holding the ends of it to bounce your cheeks for a second before letting it drop from your body.

You walk over to the in-ground hot tub that overlooks the entire valley you’re staying in and slip off your shoes before stepping into the hot water and turning toward him. Your breath is caught in your throat, you knew he was taking off his clothes of course… but now he’s standing in front of you, slipping off his shoes too and stepping into the pool. You reach over and tap a button on the side and the jets turn on, bubbling immediately around you.

You sit on the little bench and look at him, biting your lip as he comes and sits next to you.

“Skinny dipping in the hot tub huh?”

“I thought maybe we could have a little…round two, from my first time? You remember right?”

He leans forward, pressing his lips to yours in a gentle kiss. You can feel the energy radiating from his body, the intense need to just take you. But he kisses you like it’s the first time like he’s still a bit shy, doesn’t know if you’re gonna reciprocate and it just about melts your heart.

“Of course I remember” He nuzzles his nose against yours and you giggle, doing it back “One of the best damn nights of my life”

Your cheeks flush a pretty pink and he pulls away a little just to stare at you, to stare at the love of his life… the woman he’s going to marry.

“Mine too,” you say quietly, not breaking the hushed tension that’s fallen over you two. It’s so thick you could cut it with a knife, and when you look into his eyes, a heavy weight settles on your chest. It’s comfortable, familiar, like he’s curling up in your soul, and he’s there to stay.

“I love you” He breathes, cupping your face with a wet hand. You smile and crawl into his lap, setting your arms on his shoulders

“You know? What a coincidence! I just happen to love you too”

“What a great turn of events we have here” He snickers and holds your waist, putting you properly in his lap so you’re straddling him. He drags his hands slowly over your curves, the hot, bubbling water causing a deep desire to settle in the pit of his stomach.

“I wonder what we’re gonna do…with all this love” He mumbles, leaning down and kissing your breasts, his moan is mumbled as he buries his face between them, his hands coming up to squeeze them on his face

“Eddie Diaz!” You squeak and he places soft kisses on them.

“Yes? Mrs. Diaz?”

He grins wickedly when he feels the way your hips stutter against his, your cheeks flushing

“Oh…oh you like that don’t you Sugar cube?” he kisses your neck, squeezing your sides and you arch your back a little

“Mrs Edmundo Diaz“ He inhales your sweet perfume, his eyes rolling back a little as his hips move against yours. His hands flow down your sides and push your ass against him, your breath hitches and he smiles, looking up at you with all the adoration in the world.

“You’ve got little hearts in your eyes” You giggle, pulling him closer to you and settling against him

“So do you” He teases, letting his head rest against the ledge of the pool while you attack his neck, sucking and biting at his sensitive skin, causing his hips to buck against yours

“Why can’t you be Mr. Y/N Buckley? Because personally, I feel like Eddie Buckley is cute” You interrogate and he hums, gasping when you bite down on the soft spot on his neck.

“Uh…I mean-“ Your tongue trails over his Adam’s apple and he groans quietly, losing his train of thought completely.

“Or maybe… we can be both” You reach down, stroking his cock and he melts into your hand, slumping further into the water

“Hm?”

Your thumb swirls over the tip as you massage his cock, watching the way his mouth falls open slowly and he jerks into your hand

“We can be Diaz-Buckley, that way you’re happy… and you know, Buck is happy”

“Please don’t mention your cousin when your hand is on my cock”

You snort into his shoulder, and he smacks your butt, squeezing your cheeks and you squeak, pushing at his hands

“Hey! Watch those paws!”

“Right, so you can jerk me off like a little tease but I can’t touch you back? Is that what we’re playing at?”

Your jaw drops open and closed as you stare at him, he smirks and you want to rip his stupid mustache off

“I literally have no idea what you’re talking about”

“I think that’s enough foreplay” You yelp as he gets up, holding your waist and turning you over. He manhandles you into position, your knees spread, hands braced against the smooth walls.

He leans over you, pressing his body into yours and sliding his hand between your legs, you whimper softly as he spreads your folds, sliding his fingers against your slick clit easily. Your head falls forward and he uses his legs to push you forward a bit. Your hips roll against his cock as he nudges you forward more and you turn your head back

“Eddie what are you-“ Your spine snaps straight and he chuckles, listening to you moan sweetly as he pushes you toward one of the jets. He keeps your hips in place and you spread your legs wider letting your head fall forward again as you roll them against the water stream.

“Ohh my god” You purr and Eddie lets go of your hip, stroking his cock a couple of times. He leans forward and kisses your shoulder and you shiver, looking back at him

“Thought you said foreplay was over” You mutter and he kisses you, his tongue swirling with yours and sending you spinning

“For me, I don’t mind watching you come undone though”

“Is it because you can only last six seconds?”

“Oh haha, hehe, so funny.” He rolls his eyes, lining himself up with you and dragging his cock through your folds, hissing when he feels the jet against him

“Uh huh,” You giggle “feels so-so good doesn’t it” You pant, grinding your ass into him. He groans and squeezes your hip tighter, thrusting his cock between your legs for a second, letting the jets kiss his tip.

“Feels almost as good as you do” He moans, burying his face in your shoulder, you feel him line his cock up with your entrance and you eagerly push back, slipping the tip inside you.

“Jesus Sugar Cube” His voice cracks and your heart pounds in your ears as he pushes into you, his breath hitches and he lets out a soft whine, sinking his teeth into your shoulder. He wraps one arm around your waist and the other slides between your breasts, his long fingers wrapping around your throat.

“Gonna make love to my pretty girl” He pants in your ear as he moves his hips, thrusting slowly at first. You grab his arm, digging your nails into it as his thrusts get harder, he angles his hips deeper, kissing your cervix with every rough snap.

“I don’t think I’ll ever get used to your size” you pant, your head bouncing on his shoulder and he smirks, trailing his lips down your neck

“And I don’t think I’ll ever stop loving this tight little pussy” He slides his arm down your torso, rubbing your clit in circles

“Shoulda done this for your first time anyway” He bends you forward and makes you brace your hands against the wall, then lifts his leg, planting his foot on the cement seating and pushing into you deeper. You let out a high-pitched shriek as he suddenly pounds into you, his hands gripping your waist and your shoulder as he takes you.

The water is splashing all over the place, you’re sure Eddie is bruising your hip, and your knees are getting a little scraped up but you can’t bring yourself to care and neither can he. You open your legs further, bouncing your hips to meet each thrust and he growls in your ear, sending a shiver up your spine as you curl your toes

“I’m gonna cum baby” He rubs your clit faster and you moan your back arching

“Inside me, please please inside me” you beg and he grunts, his hips stalling for a second and he looks at you

“I mean… I can’t do it in the pool, that’s probably gonna like…throw off the pH balance or something…”

“Eddie Diaz!”

“I’m just saying!! I was a Cabana boy one summer as a teenager okay! I had to clean out the pool and the pool guy taught me all that”

“So what you’re saying is after we’ve fucked in this for the next two weeks you can fix it?”

“Absolutely”

“Wow, that’s actually really interesting!” You put your hand on your chin, resting your elbow on the edge of the wall and he grins

“You really think so?”

“Of course I do! You gotta tell me more….you know after you freaking cum in me and we finish the whole having sex thing”

“Oh my god I totally forgot about that”

“Yeah, I kinda thought so” You smile at him and he blushes, pulling out of you and turning you around. He sinks back into you, his breath hitching while he rubs your thighs as you wrap them around his waist.

He holds your hips, while you wrap your arms around his neck, staring into his eyes. He smiles and leans forward, nuzzling his nose against yours and kissing you softly. Your fingers thread through his short hair, tugging at the soft strands as he sets a lazy pace. He wraps one arm around your waist, making your back arch and places his other hand on the side of the pool.

“Still remember how we fucked like animals for days after your first time” He pants, rolling his hips and you moan, letting your head fall back

“Uh huh” You squeak when he starts to thrust harder, thinking about how tight and innocent you were

“You remember-“ Eddie’s voice catches as his hips speed up, sloshing the water around again. “You remember when I came home for lunch and pinned you down to the kitchen floor?”

He grins wickedly, loving that sweet little blissed-out smile on your face, loving how you always get so cock drunk on him. He pulls you closer to him, your chest bouncing against his as he attacks your neck, biting and sucking at the soft skin, leaving behind his mark.

“You remember the way you tried to crawl away from me after your third creampie and I just kept dragging your hips back?” He hisses in your ear, you feel his grip on your body get tighter, knocking the wind out of you with each intense thrust and You nod fast, because god how could you forget that day? He left you on the floor, cum spilling from your poor, abused pussy while you passed out for a much-needed nap.

It was also super funny when Eddie came home with flowers and a worried look on his face, asking if he’d gone too far, if you were okay and that he’d make it all up to you. You graciously accepted the flowers, giving him a little kiss on the cheek and reassuring him that you definitely would have made him stay if you needed him to. He still felt a little guilty… so he ate you out for hours that night, holding your hand as you climaxed over and over again.

“Can we do that again?” You moan out. You can feel that pressure almost ready to pop and you know he can too when he lets you go, making you put your hands on the cement seating and puts both hands on your hips again, slamming you down on his cock faster and faster

“Fuck I was hoping you’d ask that, You’re not gonna be able to walk this whole trip baby, gonna have my cock inside you every moment” Eddie’s fingers slide over your thigh before brushing against your clit. Your body jerks and he does it again, using his long fingers to rub your clit. Your toes curl and your back arches when he uses a third finger to grind against your clit and you let out a high-pitched scream as you come undone around him.

You meet his thrusts as you ride out your high, mewling and gasping and squirting on his cock. He groans loudly, impatiently waiting for you to start to come down before grabbing your hips with both hands again and slamming into you, you cry out his name and he cums with a loud moan.

His hips don’t stop until he’s shoved every last drop inside you. He pulls out just enough to turn you over on your hands and knees again and thrusts right back inside you, letting out little whimpering noises as he cums again. He rolls his hips, grinding them into yours as he fills you up, cursing your name softly, almost deliriously as he finally finishes.

He doesn’t pull out, instead he pulls your limp body against his chest and plops down on the bench. He slouches a little and wraps his arms tightly around you.

“You okay Corazón?” He pants softly, running his hands over your sides and you nod, still fully blissed out on his cock, especially loving the way you can feel it still inside you

“I think so”

Your voice is a little scratchy and he chuckles, kissing your throat

“I’m sorry I was so rough…you just get me so excited” He peppers little kisses over your neck and you giggle

“Trust me I know the feeling… you remember what else we did?” You play with his fingers and he lets his head fall back against the wall

“No? What?” He asks and you smirk, snuggling down into him

“I guess it’ll just have to be a surprise”

“Anybody home??” Buck enters the house, setting his bag down on the side of the door and slipping off his shoes. You’d left the front door open for him in case you and Eddie were out back in the pool or something. He’d texted before he got on the plane and when he got off, you hadn’t responded to the one where he said he was on his way to the house and he was incredibly suspicious.

He walks through the place, his mouth falling wider as he goes through each room, they’re all more beautiful than the next.

He’d been calling out but there was still no answer… okay so maybe you guys were in the pool… but this house is so huge it’s no wonder you didn’t hear him. He takes out his phone to just call you when he finally comes to the door at the end of the hall

“Where are those two freaks, I’m hungry I wanna go to lu-“

“You’re doing so good for me baby” You moan, as you run your hands over Eddie’s thighs. Your hands trail up to his chest as you thrust into him slowly. His breath hitches and he lets out a low whine when your hand wraps around his cock, jerking him off.

“Fuck Mommy” He blushes deeply, throwing his head back on the pillows

Suddenly you hear the snap of a camera and Eddie’s head shoots up.

“I FUCKING KNEW YOU WERE A LITTLE BITCH”

[layanomaly]

HOLY SHIT YOU GUYS????

THIS EPISODE WAS A MASTERPIECE WTF

“The flow of time is an illusion”

THE TIME SKIPSSS????

AND THE WAY EVERYTHING FIT INTO INTO PLACE AT THE ENDDASHJDBKJFV

THE WHOLE THING SCRATCHED A PART OF MY BRAIN THAT I DIDNT EVEN KNOW EXISTED

AND THE TAROT READINGSSSSS?????? THE IMAGERY OF IT ALLL

BUT STOP JEN AND LILLIA😭

MARVEL REALLY SAID WE’LL GIVE YOU A DEEP CONNECTION BETWEEN 2 PEOPLE FOR ONE EP 

JUST TO KILL ONE OF THEM

AKSJHFBKEUFJBAEKRUFGAERF

COME BACK LILLIA WE MISS YOU

BUT WAIT AFTER WHAT HAPPENED DOES THIS MEAN THE SALEM SEVEN ARE DEAD????

ALSO RIO AS DEATH????

I KNOW WE ALL SAW THAT COMING 

BUT GOD THE REVEAL UGHHHHHHHH

IF I WASNT IN LOVE WITH HER CHARACTER BEFORE I DEFINITELY AM NOW

AND AGATHA LMFAOO

SOMEONE SAID SHE WAS IN THIS EPISODE JUST TO MAKE IT CLEAR TO EVERYONE THAT SHE WAS A LESBIAN 

BAHAHAHAHAAHAHA

“I was your moms…….ex-bestfriend”

“You want straight answers ask a straight lady”

“What can I say. I like the bad boys”

YES AGATHA WE KNOW

[terri-theslime13]

fucked up that tumblr just does that to people

like hey, that was my birth assigned gender wtf

how dare you help me realize I don't need to conform to walls and that I can be free and add silly little words that make me feel better

how dare you make me go from being called "he" and reacting "yeah, that's me" to being called "xey" and reacting "holy shit!! you used that!! me!!"

how dare you make me feel more comfortable as a person and existing because I can be whatever I want forever and that's beautiful

I love you guys /p

be queer, kill the cop inside your brain, do crimes, and be whoever the fuck you want

[vikcacao]

Dude you gotta stop giving me such good answers because my brain chews them up and starts BOUNCING OFF THE WALLS sob

Also my bad for not sending these earlier I have had them ready since like Monday but…. School😔

Kakabfkskxbxhdh okay okay ALBINO GOJO!? THATS SO COOL!!!! How does his albinism affect him? Like does he have trouble seeing? Or like regulating his body temperature? Do Arctic mermaids have more fatty tissue to fend off the cold, like seals do?

YOUR RELIGION STUFF IS SO INSANE!! I love that you thought sm about it. Do mermaids have creation myths? Do mermaid myths vary region to region? Do epics and songs exist about figures in their mythology/religion? This might sound a little insane but do story archetypes exist in mermaid culture? Actually, how big is oral story telling in their cultures ( assuming they don’t have a written language)?

If a juvenile mermaid is orphaned, do other pod members take in the orphans? Are orphans viewed positively or negatively? If an entire pod died besides a juvenile, would another unrelated pod take them in? (Kinda morbid but I wanna know everything lol)

The fact that mermaids view planes as a variant of birds is so funny to me, like “oh, there goes the southwest bird, how majestic.” (Since planes sometimes crash do they just think some birds are rolling around with legendary loot? And do they prey on waterfowl?) I feel like it’s not that hard to sneak up on them.

TIGER SHARK YUUJI!!!!! I lowkey forgot he exists but do you have a ref sheet for him? I would very much like to draw him :]

Does Megumi have any piercings? Do mermaids have a third eyelid? What do mermaid maps/calendars look like? Do they follow a different month schedule than humans? (How do they count years, now that I think of it?) Do they have events that surround the eclipse or blood moons? I’m going feral about those mermaids and the moon things sorryyyy

Anyway I think that’s all I have rn !!! Thank youuuu :33 (ps, I have a piano lesson Wednesday wish me luck lmfaooo cause I may be slightly slacking on my practice)

ahhhhhhhh yayyyyyy lol

this is gonna take me a hot second to answer, sorry if this takes like a day lmao. each sorta segment is gonna be numbered bc i'm lazy <3

1 ----------

Gojo is albino, and yeah it affects his vision and his skin. That's why he hangs out (and married) deep sea mermaids, since they live in darker parts of water they don't rely so much on sight, and the sun is less intense.

artic mermaids commonly are much bigger and have shorter tails than other races of mermaids. Gojo is around double the size of Megumi, but in terms of length they're actually around the same. Bigger bodies means more tissue, and my little doodle of Gojo made him pretty thick, too lol.

the bigger bodies thing is inspired from the fact (?) that large marine animals live in the Antarctic. I learned this a while ago, so take it with a grain of salt on how true that is. But still, artic mermaids are on average the largest race of merfolk

2 ----------

Yes, myths and stories vary depending on region, but the characterization of the god/goddesses remains relatively consistent. and yeah, stories/myths/epic all exist, as well as story architypes.

there are creation myths, like merfolk kind being hatched from pearl the goddess of the ocean created/birthed. Or that the goddesses of the ocean and moon came together with two halves (one marine and one "human") to create the first mermaid. The most common theme is that the goddess of the ocean is sorta like the mother of mermaid kind lol

oral story telling is a big thing, most stories are told via word of mouth. BUT merfolks do have written languages, many of them since the written language changes alongside the verbal language. Very important stories get written down, but it's a time-consuming labor of love since it requires lots and lots of carving and safe keeping of the tablet (do avoid erosion lol)

3 ----------

HOLY SHIT ORPHANS ARE LOWKEY SO IMPORTANT TO THIS FIC LMFAO, since Megumi is an orphan.

when orphaned, the child loses their surname and instead it gets replaced by their birth regions word for orphan, where Megumi is the word is "Fushiguro"

yes it's very common for the first pod an orphan stumbles upon to take in the child, if the pod can't care for the child in the long term, then they will protect them until they find a suitable pod.

orphans are deemed really important actually, especially if they're foreign. When they come of courting age, they'll leave their birth region and travel as far as they possibly can to court and mate with distant mermaids. They help with genetic diversity, which is why they move so far away (to prevent accidental incest).

orphans are the only group of merfolk to travel such large distances solo, but it's customary for pods to temporarily allow adult/traveling orphans to rest/eat with them so they survive the journey.

i'm so glad I got a question about orphans ngl, since orphan culture in mermaids is one of the few universals (and like I said, really important to Megumi's character)

since the purpose of an orphan's move is to prevent incest, Megumi getting with Yuuji is allowed since there is no way in hell they're related. They're different species lmfaooo

4 ----------

Birds are a part of mermaid diets, mainly surface mermaids since they live near the surface (duh lmao).

I can see deep sea mermaids actually being kinda scared of birds, since plane crashes rest against the ocean floor and that would kinda freak out the mermaids that live there lol

5 ----------

I'll reblog this with mermaid Yuuji's ref sheet and colors soon !!!! I don't have them rn, so give me like an hour (I'm writing this between classes and don't have my ipad atm lol)

6 ----------

Megumi has no piercings, but yeah mermaids do have third eyelids.

they don't really have maps, since it would take too long to carve them. They just memorize underwater currents like people memorize roads and shit lol

mermaid Calanders are pretty much 100% dependent on the stars. Months are counted depending on which constellations are visible, and so they also have a way to count years when they constellations cycle. I haven't look too much into calanders, but I assume the months are different from human months bc of the star thing lol

((I guess that would mean multiple mermaid months could happen at the same time ???? Like when multiple constellations are visible that means it's multiple months/seasons. If that makes sense lol. ))

((idk how constellations work.....))

Yes, they have events around blood moons and weird celestial shit lol. Mainly lots of story telling and special actions like taking a day of rest or hunting for the full day. Stuff like that. They're more common among surface mermaids since they're the ones who commonly see and are affected by the sun and moon lol

thank you for asking so many questions !!!!!! and good luck on your piano lmao

when I played an instrument (clarinet lol) I never practiced. I was also very bad. My reed was always flat lmfao

[smaller-comfort]

For the blorbo ask: Let's go with Resh'an and ohhh, give me your thoughts on Sephiroth. As for which questions: 1, 6, 7, 13, 14, and 24.

1. who’s the Blorbo that you’ve never posted about on your blog?

I'm trying to think if there's any secret deep lore blorbo to unlock here, but I do periodically froth at the mouth about the Imperial Radch and Locked Tomb characters that I love. There's the Active Blorbo Roster and then there's all the characters sittin' on the bench in reserve, right?

And there are a lot of those- all the part 5 JJBA kids, Shanks from One Piece, Hakkai from Saiyuki, Mustadio FFTactics.

6. if you could talk to your Blorbo, what would you say to them?

I used to do a lot of 'interview the character' writing exercises when I was younger, but it's not really something that jives with my brain these days. So the boring answer is, I wouldn't say anything. I'm a bad conversationalist.

The *funny* answer- okay, so you remember the era of geocities websites with goofy "under construction" gifs and entire pages dedicated to script-style interactions between the site owner and their favorite characters, right. I had one of those. It was where I posted my multichaptered mary sue self insert oc/Sephiroth fanfic. I cannot for the life of me remember what it was called- no, wait, fuck, the title was "To Shed a Tear" holy shit I wish I hadn't remembered that-the oc was Rufus' sister and a member of the Turks, and look, it was 1998, I had to teach myself html somehow-

Uh. Anyway. So, ultimately, I would probably be apologizing to Sephiroth for all of that, and then maybe just asking for a swift death or something, idk.

I'd have nothing to say to Resh'an because in the ARG he's explicitly stated that he doesn't want to talk about his personal life with the rest of us, and I would attempt tobrespect that boundary. (Really, most of what I might say would probably get me banned from the Sabotage discord.) (I'd probably have to apologize to him for all the fanfic, too. *cough*)

7. what’s the one thing the fandom gets wrong about your Blorbo?

Sephiroth was not involved in some kind of well adjusted five person SOLDIER polycule pileup before the Nibelheim incident. That man has never looked at another human being and experienced a sexual thought in his *life*.

(This does not prevent him from walking Zack on a leash when the occasion calls for it, but like. That's just being a responsible friend. Sometimes Angeal is busy.)

I'm open to a lot of different interpretations of Resh'an right now- the fandom is so small, I'll take whatever I can get and be happy about it, honestly. I'm sure there are people who think *I'm* the one getting him wrong, though, and on some level this idea pleases me in the blackened, contrarian corners of my soul. Sorry, I've taken your mysterious mentor character with a tragic past and turned him into a sopping wet rag with erectile dysfunction. (I'm not that sorry.) (technically it's not ED it's anorgasmia *is shot*)

13. is there any crime, any wrongdoing your Blorbo could commit that would make you stop loving them and remove them from your hyperfixation entirely?

me, sitting on the front porch, sipping a shitty cocktail while watching Meteor about to obliterate the solar system: ...nah.

This kind of gets into like...Doylist/Watsonian characterization, right? The character is just going to do what they're written to do. So is there anything Square Enix could do to make Sephiroth stop being my blorbo? I guess they already did Crisis Core so like...It really doesn't get much worse than that. (I say this, but I haven't finished Rebirth! I am only vaguely aware of the major plot divergence stuff.)

All that said...Squeenix can't take the OG away from me. I'm stuck with the general background radiation of the Compilation, but the things that made me love the game, and the experience of playing it as a child, are always going to be mine. My particular take on Sephiroth exists largely independent of canon and the current fandom at this point.

For Resh'an- let him war criminal even harder! XD

Really, though, I'm steeling myself for inevitable disappointment around his canon backstory and the ultimate resolution of the story. This is not meant to be any shade on Thierry Boulanger's storytelling skills- but being part of the fandom for an ongoing story is always a unique experience, and it tends to leave you with complicated feelings towards the actual conclusion of the story, no matter how good it ends up being.

But if he and Aephorul turn out to be stereotypical anime rivals pre-immortality, I will be *extremely* annoyed (I say, as I write them constantly bickering and antagonizing each other). But I don't think that would even be a deal breaker for me at this point.

14. have you ever distanced yourself from your Blorbo / have you ever left a fandom because people in the fandom were being too toxic?

Maybe back when I was more active in fandom in general? My memory is too fucky to answer this properly, I think; I know there absolutely were people in AC fandom who made me want to eat paint, but I don't think they were why I left. Most of the time when I leave a fandom, it's because I get bored or lose interest or fall into a depression hole for half a decade. (The depression hole is what makes this hard to answer. From 2018-2023 I wasn't on tumblr or fannish twitter and I wasn't really reading fanfic or "doing fandom" at all.)

I've left/avoided certain fandoms because of non-fandom interpersonal blow ups with specific people- I've had several friend groups explode messily over the years, and avoiding some of those people meant avoiding fandoms we used to share. (FFVII was briefly, tangentially one of those for me back in 2009.)

Now, I'm more likely to distance myself from a fandom if I find it annoying, honestly. I spent like ten minutes in the In Stars and Time tag and very quickly determined that it was Not For Me, and that's totally fine! It's a perfectly lively fandom, it's just not my thing. Same with Baldur's Gate and Arcane (and to a lesser extent TLT); I just get the curated content from my lovely mutuals, and if there's anything else going on, I pretend I do not see it.

24 if you could change one canonical thing about your Blorbo, what would it be?

Lemme just- *slam dunks Genesis Rhapsodos into the trash* And look! Nothing of value was lost. Nothing changes in the story that needed to be changed. The tragedy still unfolds, and it's 50% less idiotic! Angeal can stay. He's fine.

Maybe they've fixed the idiocy in Rebirth. I doubt it, though. Sephiroth's appeal initially comes partly from him being a bit of a blank slate- the players get a very limited window into who he is and what his whole deal is, and that vast *potential* is where some of the best (most unhinged) fanworks develop. The OG is very deliberate about how it treats Sephiroth as a villain- he's literally the shark from Jaws, hovering under the narrative. Twenty five years later he's one of the most recognizable video game villains in the world, so I understand *why* Remake went a different direction. But it's still a little disappointing. Sometimes leaving things vague and mysterious is good, actually!

Anyway, other than setting Genesis on fire- I don't know. Put him in one of those slutty turtlenecks with the boob window. It's what we deserve. (The serious answer- sort of- make him 2000% more body horror about the Jenova cells. Give him tentacles to go with the fucking angel wings.)

As for Resh'an- we've got three more games to go. He's sitting firmly in that sweet spot of unhinged potential; we don't know enough about his backstory yet for me to want it changed. So, really, the only change I'd make at this juncture would probably be to give the Great Eagle more tail feathers. It just *bothers* me, okay. Why are there only three.

[starly-amazing]

Thinkin about Zelda and ISAT

They're both two games/series near and dear to my heart which have a lot of crossover potential. Just wanted to ramble off some disjointed (emphasis on the disjointed) thoughts before I trip and fall in my own crossover hell which I DO NOT have time for (also why you haven't seen any Nier/ISAT crossovers from me despite the MASSIVE POTENTIAL for crossovers from so many similar themes between them, mainly Nier: Automata).

I haven't read more than part of one isat/zelda crossover of it but I occasionally see fanart of it which I love so so much but it's also weird seeing Mirabelle/Siffrin drawn as (usually BOTW) Link since neither of them are really "chosen ones". They're both "just a guy". Like, don't get me wrong I love the fanart and no shade to the artists but it gets my brain going sometimes.

I think crossovers would work better thematically with Wind Waker. WW Link is 'just a guy' who wanted to save his kidnapped sister. He's not the chosen one who died ages ago and never returned which is what spurred the events of Wind Waker in the first place.

He's just a guy who left his island home with pirates he just met to try to save her. Through the game has to collect the Triforce fragments to prove he's worthy to go back down to old hyrule to defeat the Demon King Ganon.

WW Link also has the King of Red Lions helping him. This can work nicely with both Siffrin/Loop (somewhat rude helper with a secret identity from a world that 'no longer exists') and Mirabelle/Euphrasie (Chosen because they showed potential and because they're the one who happened to be there at the time)

I love Zelda games; I love the settings and the gameplay and art styles and stories, but at the same time it's lacking for me because I don't really get into Link's head as much as he's closer to the blank slate protagonist as Siffrin is at first shown to be before we get into the thick of the game and realize 'oh...oh no'.

Obviously we can see Link is nice and heroic and cares about Zelda and being the Good Guy (aside from trashing everyone's houses). But he's still overall someone written for as many people as possible to fill in his shoes so he's going to lack the depth that really gets me. But ho ho holy shit does ISAT rip out all my insecurities and problems and shove them into one little fella, trap me in their head in their time loop and make me suffer personally.

Honestly I don't even know what point I'm trying to make rn. More Wind Waker/ISAT crossover art I guess. Mirabelle and Siffrin being "just a guy" forced into a hero role rather than The Chosen One. Link and Siffrin both have cool pointy hats.

Look at my cat her name is Kainé Sunny Fartypants Von Siffrin L'Dadnier.

[anarchic-miscellany]

Reading "One Piece" for the first time: Part 19 Is there a form we can fill out to get a different protagonist? Like, can I appeal to a higher authority? Can we get Naoki Urasawa to write a couple of chapters? Our gang are hiking through the desert in between flashbacks to the Princess' backstory and her talk of rebellion. Our Idiot protagonist has the switch in his head flipped to "bored now, doing this" and decides not to take part in the rebellion because he wants to fight the crocodile man instead; and gives a big rambling talk about how people are going to die and it's naive to think that people won't. My good slut: Your ENTIRE personality for this series has been "no! There's always a 3rd option and people mustn't die!" It comes completely out of nowhere and less like an arc and more like a guest writer who hates Ohda for sleeping with his wife has taken over the chapter.

At least the Himbo has been put on the backburner, and Giga Chad shows some concern for his fellow buddies (more than our Idiot protagonist, funny that...) in the heat of the desert, particularly Blue Nosed Reindeer whom he is concerned for the health of (though that may be because he does not want the meat to spoil). Meanwhile Idiot is just being a melodramatic bitch about the water now, like his personality is determined by a fucking roulette wheel...

We have the rather boring goons of the Crocodile Man discuss their evil schemes around the table; including the return of Rodeo Stripper the most interesting one! The gang seem shocked and surprised that he is an evil pirate... Guys, in your line of work (toppling regimes and subsuming the cities from beneath them) do you think you're going to be working with many orphanages and philanthropic nuns? Fuck me, everybody in this Universe has the brain of a sock drawer... Except no, we get the best fucking guy Smoker back! He's having a drink at the bar, Cop on the Edge that he is, with his assistant Girl Uryu from "Bleach"; when Idiot and Meme in Progress Usopp come in desperate for a drink of water. It takes a while, but they notice Captain Smoker and leg it, out into the street.

Now this is something I'm down for in terms of an action sequence: we've had the King building up to his attack on Crocodile, Crocodile planning his own thing (him only knowing the existence of 5 of the crew and The Princess and not Giga Chad Sanji because he was back on the boat having a smoke and making fish is funny, and I'm glad that plot point came back, I hope that they do something with it) and the rebellion building its forces all converging. Himbo not fighting Girl Uryu was odd, but hey, it's nice character suff and I hope it also builds to something.

Then our Idiot is caught in quite possibly the easiest trap ever conceived, and praises the genius of it: ending up locked in a cage in the Crocodile Casino (which I think is a Jethro Tull album) alongside his crew and Smoker.

Are we sure that I can't swap him out for somebody else? Don't get me wrong he's not as annoying or loathsome as Chadda Darkmane (fun fact: I hate him so much I got his first name wrong) or Lelouch Lamperouge but holy fucking shit.

BUT

This kind of thing is my jam: a favourite thing of mine is "gritted teeth enemies forced to work together" and Smoker is absolutely fucking fantastic, I want way more of him, so having him team up with the crew to plan an escape (let him plan it, because fuck I think I actually actively dislike the protagonist of this series?) is fun.

Also, the princess is kidnapped by a machine gun bird and Smoker reveals the existence of magic ocean rocks which block Fruit Powers. Sure.

Sure.

[yeetspace]

Now wait a fucking second...

Why does the beastial incantation look like that....

Anthropology brain tells me this is a transliteration of an existing symbol that has been lost and repurposed.

It looks to be a symbol that has no analog to any other magic symbols we see in the game, but slashed through.

Doesn't even look like crucible incantation which was my first thought because the thing that came to mind for that was the idea that the beast Julian cantatians come from animals, animals come from the crucible.

But they don't. The crucible draws from the things that exists to imbue their essences to those born in its presence.

It is not the progenitor of these traits It is simply an adopter and bestower of.

So there's animal magic.... Right?

Like because what we see that the beastial incantations are, are very specifically magic seemingly drawn from animals, like the roar of Rua, But with the addition of it being used to fight against those who would work against destined death.

This is a propagandized repurposing of a symbol.

Beastial incantation symbol is a symbol that's meant to interpret some sort of antithesis to whatever this original symbology was, whatever this weird almost crest-looking symbol was.

We know it's not dragon called because they have very specific symbology, which I bring up specifically because Gorounq and Malekith are in the Dragon City. Like I know that's because it's the farthest place from everything that's going on so no one can try and get a hold of destiny death again, but it's something to bring up, there's no reference to these symbols anywhere else.

There's an entire lost art of magic...

probably some fucking Leyndell Blair mountain shit, Just fully removed from history like they were already trying to do with the crucible by the time we get there in the game before all hell breaks loose and they just can't propagandize properly anymore.

In a world of such powerful magics it's insane there's not some sort of sentient creatures, there's only these meek, miniscule scattering things that are inherently afraid of you, of people.

Even ones that have seemingly been places that they should be acclimated to them by....

I'm fully convinced that there is a loss art of magic in Elden ring that's implied simply through the implication of the anthropological steps taken from having a symbol only just be a symbol in itself but clawed through like that. And that lost art of magic has something to do with the animals-

we even see the ghost of one I'm thinking of it now holy fuck Oh my God holy shit Godfrey and Serosh...

They don't have symboled magic, But look at what he's doing...

Cracking the Earth...

And what are the beast you incantations? Shards of Earth....

I'm fucking figuring this shit out in real time, Godfrey is one of the only people displaying original animal magic All the while the beast you'll incantations are effectively a religious weaponized version of this magic against Those Who Live In Death.

In the exact same way the primeval spells have no symbols, animal magic doesn't have symbols....

OH HOLY FUCK HOLY SHIT OH MY GOD WAIT

an empty frame.

WHAT WOULD BE THE ONLY WAY TO SYMBOLIZE SOME ANTITHESIS TO ORIGINAL CONCEPT THAT HAS NO DIRECT SYMBOLOGY TO IT? A VAGUE REFERENCE BY REFERENCING IT AS NOTHING IN A FRAME AND SLICING THROUGH THAT FRAME, IN THE SAME WAY THAT WE WOULD PUT A FUCKING BIG OLD WRONG MARK OVER SOMETHING HOLY SHIT