Hey what're your thoughts on how marcille and chilchuck show affection for marchil?
I mean, marcille seems to be the type to be the most blatantly affectionate of the two, but I want to know your headcanons and observations on the subject. How do they communicate their wants for affection, and what do they view as signs of affection (ex: hugs, small gifts, ect.) and such?
Sorry it took me this long to answer!! Thank you sm for sending a marchil ask my way I swear I love them sm, they spark joy and even if I have uhh -checks- 67 drafts already I love dropping everything for them when the mood comes hehehe.
I love talking about love languages actually! Little did you know that the first post I made on this blog was about analyzing the love languages of an ot3 lmao. The only reason why this is so late overdue is because as always I’m going to talk so much about it. The pics I put in it are relevant but I don’t put them right beside where I make my point, so stick with me even if they’re a bit jarring at first, they’re just meant to show aspects of them~.
Marcille and Chilchuck’s love languages
+ their domestic romantic dynamic. I’ll say, I ended up talking even more than I expected, and though it is in a marchil context I think my analysis of the characters is relevant even if their partner was anyone else, so non-marchil shippers might also enjoy this post! Give it a shot maybe~
To open it up, I think this post is very relevant. Marchil is def a ship where the ways in which they say they love each other feel more subtle, for Chilchuck at least.
Their perspective, boundaries and overlap
I think Chilchuck and Marcille recognize the other’s way of showing affection well, though it’s very obvious that Marcille and Chilchuck’s ways are super different. Marcille is very open and loud and Chilchuck… Isn’t. Chilchuck is reserved while Marcille loves to get all the affection she can get. Marcille could be seen as too much while Chilchuck would be too little. One could even say they aren’t compatible, but I think that’d be a mistake.
Yes Marcille loves big grand gestures and a lot of open communication, but her thing is analyzing people as they are, like how when she imagines how it’d have been like as his wife she put in details like how he’d be annoyed at having to wait for her to get ready and didn’t idealize that part of their relationship. She’s very good at putting herself in others’ shoes, at understanding why they might feel this or that way.
She typically doesn’t seem put off when Chil is snappy or discouraging at her, like when she shows him the ball of Izutsumi’s hair that she shaped into a cat lol. (The panel at the start of this section was when she was disappointed in him for cheating on his wife, so her good esteem for him was gone). She has a high esteem of Chilchuck’s intentions and has good faith in him overall, so instead of going "He’s annoyed at waiting on me… Am I annoying to him? Does he dislike me?" or "He didn’t notice I got upset when we were out drinking with his colleagues. Does he even love me anymore? Would he care if I left him?" she goes "Oh that’s just how he is, I know if there’s an actual issue he’ll tell me, and he still has my best interests at heart.". Who knows if she’d always be able to rationalize and keep that optimistic attitude up long term, but it gives me a good impression that she would! Or that at least she’d communicate about it if she felt their relationship had a problem.
She loves to confront people about that sort of thing! She can be more insecure and meek when the topic is sensitive to her like her being a half-elf, but when it comes to relationships like that, I believe she’d stand up for herself if it came down to it. The way she said that his wife might have left to "test his love" and see if he’d chase after her is a bit worrying to me, but ultimately I think that was her dramatic novels fan self talking and not something that she’d do herself. If she did leave, she would sooo leave a super long dramatic letter about how she felt and the situation and he’d reply and they’d make up I think. ANYWAYS!
Of course everyone needs to be shown some affection once in a while regardless of if she knows well how he is or not, and Marcille would be very unashamed about asking that of him. She’d respect his boundaries with public displays of affection as much as he’d demand it, but she’d be her usual overt self with stealing kisses or making him say I love you regularly. 0 PDA would be rough on her if Chilchuck wanted it that far, but she’d do it, she’d be able to twist it into something endearing too, like her being like "No one else gets to see him this way but me, I have this sweet side of him all to myself" and "He’s just reserved like that, it makes the time when he does show it all the more meaningful", them cuddling a ton as soon as they get home and Marcille feels touch starved, etc etc.
So what I’m getting at with all this is: Marcille’s love languages are very self-evident and hard to miss so unless Marcille suddenly acts mopey and doesn’t tell him why, and unless Chilchuck has some anxiety (what with his ex wife just up and leaving without him having been able to see the warning signs), he would feel very confident in her love for him and comfortable in the relationship, if not a little tired or frustrated with some aspects of it if she sometimes does too much.
Meanwhile, like mentioned, even if Chilchuck’s love languages are more subtle, more rooted in casual domesticity rather than big gestures or words, Marcille would see and recognize that and not hold it against him or feel burdened by it. She highly values communication —in a way they both do, even if when it’s about feelings Chilchuck becomes a bit of an ostrich hiding his head underground— so if there’s a problem she’ll for sure confront him about it too.
Chilchuck is good at voicing when there are practical problems or when he’s uncomfortable, and Marcille is good at voicing when there are emotional problems, so they’re pretty complementary in that way.
Surprisingly I think if she ever did a marriage proposal it’d be very private though, it’d be a big deal to her and she would want to talk about it in the comfort of their lonesome, already thinking through the grief and how everything would work. I think Chikchuck would also prefer a private proposal, but on the other end I could totally see him thinking she’d love this grand fancy gesture of a big public proposal and organize one for her (Ooh good fic prompt right there). Once they’ve talked it through though they’re both very enthusiastic about it and openly talk about it with friends and coworkers, and Marcille gushes about her fiancé and they both have bachelor parties on their own end and whatnot. The big day would be a fun one, and the daughters would be the perfect wingwomen I believe~
Their love languages
Alright now that the groundwork is done let’s do this thing! Ok so the "official" love languages are words of affirmation, physical touch, gifts (giving and receiving), quality time and acts of service.
Marcille
Starting with Marcille, she’s pretty balanced I’d say! In the sense that she cranks them all to the max. Oh yes, and part of it is that she’s very aware that the time they have together is counted, so she wants to make the most out of every moment.
Idk if it’s fair to say that Marcille has something like separation anxiety, what with her getting mad at Falin when she left and they didn’t see each other for 4 years, and with during canon with Falin and such, because they’re all intense situations that don’t necessarily show how clingy(or not) she would be under normal circumstances (and she doesn’t live with them so she’s def ok with distance to some degree), but also I def think it’s fair to say that due to her experiences with loss she’s scared of taking her eye off of someone she loves for one moment and for them to disappear, also like how we see her talk to Izutsumi when she thinks she’s going to prison.
All that to say that yes, quality time!! She adores quality time, she’s the kind to soak up in someone’s presence even if they’re doing completely different things in the same room. She loves talking with him, cooking with him, bathing with him, even just chilling on the couch together. Post-canon they’d both be rather busy I imagine, so it only makes those moments they share more important. They’re trying out the long distance thing and making it work with the power of communicating well 🙏
Again, she’s big on acts of service, would resurrect you, would bathe you, would nurse you back to health or do something for you. Since she’s observant I could see her noticing subtle things in Chilchuck’s routine that she could help with, like getting his mug of coffee for him each morning, etc. I feel like those things are so natural to her that she wouldn’t mention them to Chilchuck or talk about how she does these things, so if she’s doing too much Chilchuck has to tell her because she won’t realize otherwise.
Gifts. We see with how she showers Chil in apology gifts intended to be from him to his family that she does value gifts! Giving wise, I think she’d be the type to be out shopping, see something that reminds of you then get it for you casually. It’s probably resulted in a few joke gifts that did not land lol, like idk modern AU a grumpy cat mug, or socks with "If you can read this bring me a beer" written underneath them. She’ll also put her heart and soul into gifts sometimes, especially for birthdays which mark the passage of time for her and even if a year passes by a little fast she makes it a point to always always go all out about it, she wants to show that he matters to her and thinks of him a lot, so she’ll put all of herself into picking out an heartfelt gift. She can get a little stressed and perfectionist over it but she does genuinely enjoy picking out gifts and giving them. Receiving wise, she’s also super big on it! She’s the kind to instantly value gifts more than other, maybe better suited options she has, like if you give her an ugly hair accessory or a mug she’ll 100% use them all the time from then on… Until she passes onto something new and the item gets sidelined a bit, but then when she’ll find it again years from then on she’ll be struck by memories and emotions and how much it all meant to her. I could see Chil getting her choker necklaces like she often wears for example, or books he can’t begin to understand about magic theory. It’s not as much of a ‘love language’ as the other ones I think, but she does really appreciate them, and if Chil makes an effort to get her flower bouquets somewhat regularly it would for sure make her feel really loved and happy. Oh yes! Also I def think that if she took up sewing or (personal hc) she’d love felting bc of when she did a tiny Izutsumi with her hair, she’d love making handmade gifts! She’d weave him a bracelet. She’d write him letters and put a nice scented oil on them.
Physical touch ohhh she’s big on touch. Even platonically we see that she’s very casual with her touches and does it a ton to most people (mostly Falin, Izutsumi and Chilchuck, but with her being a healer it also happens with Laios etc) and likes to cuddle or hang onto others, in daydream hour artworks, when sleeping with Izutsumi in an extra, etc etc. Even if she had a romantic partner I think she’d keep doing that with her friends and maybe even favoring Falin when she’s there for platonic touch, but I also def think that she’d be super touchy feely with her partner both in public and in private. As long as it doesn’t interfere with what Chil’s doing and he can remain cool and collected™️ he wouldn’t mind I think, so they’d be holding hands often and like, if he were to sit down on a couch with a beer she’d just drape herself over him and they’d chill out there (until they talk and she makes him laugh too hard and he spits his beer out all over them rip), not unlike how Izutsumi would. But YES physical touch is def a big love language for her, wether they’re arguing or just sharing a soft moment together, if he put his hand to her cheek gently she would melt into his touch. And she loves doting on others herself and touching them and feeling like they’re real and warm and alive, so yes yes touch is a big thing to her.
Words of affirmation aren’t a big deal to her to give out, because it’s so natural to her, but they would mean a lot to her to receive. She can get insecure and feel lonely/alone, and having someone be supportive and tell her that she is valued like in the mandrake chapter lifts a lot of weight off of her shoulders, and I imagine that’s doubly meaningful when the words are each and all true and earned when they come from Chil. Whenever he says "I love you" unprompted it’s like an arrow to the heart. Again, if he made the effort to be romantic and like idk, tell her poetic things like it’s a love letter she would absolutely melt. "My boyfriend is the best, most romantic most loving most virtuous man" @ everyone in hearing distance etc etc. She wants to keep his words all to herself and be a little greedy but just maybe while kicking her feet she’d go "and then he said blablabla~" with friends and coworkers at the palace (who may or may nit be willing listeners lol).
So because of all of this, of how she values all of them, I think she’d cherish whichever love language her partner does the least! She likes variety, and like we’ve talked a bit she adapts herself to whoever she’s with a bit. She’s personally a big cuddler, but she’d value whenever Chilchuck says that he loves her etc more in the end because she knows how much that means for him and how many feelings were put into that gesture for her.
She wants the full range of affection, everything that someone is ready to offer. She wants the full storybook romance experience babyy, if it’s a crumb of love she’ll take it and gobble it up whichever form it takes. They all mean something to her in different ways.
Chilchuck
Chilchuck is more picky. He knows what he likes and what he doesn’t like, and he doesn’t like to compromise much (though learning to do so is part of his arc in canon). His favorites are acts of service and words of affirmation, and physical touch selectively, imo.
First of all, Chilchuck is a more private person by nature, but I think it’s also worth pointing out that he has some stress over how things ended with his wife, so someone growing on him and him getting to trust them etc also just takes slower. Wether you think Chilchuck will largely be open and comfortable once the confession’s done and they’re dating, or if him opening up and growing used to being loving and loved again is more gradual even throughout their romantic relationship, his love languages will differ depending on what "stage" he is at. For example, I think he’d actually love receiving words of affirmation, they’re just not his highest priority and he needs to highly value them and trust them first, trust that they’re not lies or that you don’t have shit judgement. For the rest of this though I’ll assume they’ve been dating for a good while and have grown used to it and are very familiar with each other. Like Marcille maybe his insecurities creep up on him sometimes, but with the power of communication and support those moments tend to be short lived 💪 She keeps him from using alcohol as a bad coping mechanism & distraction too much.
Ok so starting out with quality time… I’ll get it out of the way but yes I think they’d be sexually active, though with how they work away from each other like with his wife and he spent 4 years holding out fr her his libido isn’t as intense as we’d asssume I think, and for elves "often" might be like once a month, so who knows. This is gonna come back in the physical touch section~ But yes Chilchuck spent a lot of time away from his family, so I think if he values quality time he super values the quality more than the quantity of time spent together. That said, I also headcanon that he gets stuck in his head a bunch about it so as long as he thinks about his family to motivate him on the job for example, he also half-asses the time he spends home and he’s generally too tired to go out and do big things, just wanna relax, so idk!! He might be a bit of a neglectful lover and Marcille needs to poke him so they go out on dates, but yes I think in a similar way to Marcille he really appreciates the time just spent together, even if it’s working on their own thing in the same room. As for conversations or emotionally meaningful moments, I think emotional stuff tires him out quickly, unlike with Marcille where she seeks emotional stimulation from books, so spending time being heartfelt and vulnerable together would be appreciated, but would need to be kinda rare for him to not be exhausted dead lying on the pavement and unable to keep up. Feeling gets him tired too, he never knows wether to repress or let the love grow or how to word what he’s feeling etc etc. At least at first, dates that are activities and allows him to just have fun without thinking much are best. It’ll take him time to grow more used to feeling emotionally naked with her and for it to come more easily and naturally, but they’ll get there and they’ll be sooo domestic.
So in the end! Quality time is appreciated but not particularly important, Chilchuck can really keeps the love going even when spending a loooong time away from each other or keeping the moments spent together casual. Oh yes I haven’t gone into that in any of my posts so far I think, but part of why he’s so casual and seemingly dismissive with his wife imo is because the relationship was sooo based on familiarity, respect and trust to him, they’ve been together forever, he trusted that they loved each other and were in this together and that he didn’t have to be extra for her to feel comfortable in the relationship because he trusted that she knew him well enough, trusted that she would stay with him even if their relationship wasn’t perfect, etc etc. So imo as long as he’s like "I love her and that’s enough for me, I trust that if there’s something up she’ll tell me and we can figure it out, I trust in our relationship to stay strong even if we don’t see each other much" then he can seem very casual and neglectful from an outside perspective. But make no mistake he thinks about her all the time and sighs forlornly because he wants to sleep in her arms after a hard day of work and has horny dreams of her 10/10 she matters a lot to him.
Acts of service!!! Biiig big one, there’s little more that Chilchuck values receiving than respect, though he’s much more stingy about giving it out, what with his teasing and insulting snappy remarks and how he’s always laughing at Marcille in canon. But yes like mentioned just before, Chilchuck likes familiarity in a relationship, so his partner anticipating his needs and going out of their way to do services for him would be suuper appreciated and would make him feel loved, would make him feel understood which in turn makes him feel safe that he doesn’t have to try and be someone he’s not to satisfy her and that she understands him well enough that she wouldn’t leave him due to miscommunication. Doing big favors would also be appreciated, but he prefers to live a routinely daily life imo so the acts of service would show themselves in small ways, like idk letting the water run in the bath because he knows Marcille will want to take a relaxing bath when she comes home from work. It’s definitely the love language that he does/give out the most imo, they’re the way he’s most comfortable showing that he cares and that he thinks of them and that he loves them, and he can feel safe doing them in any context wether he has all the eyes in the world on him or if they’re alone. He’s also generally protective, and looking out for her would fit into this category imo. But yes post-canon, I think one way in which this shows is that he’d do her hairdos, maybe even daily if possible. He loves blonde hair and he’s agile with his fingers, but he doesn’t value complicated hairdos much, but he’d learn a lot of hairdos for her, because he loves her and knows how it was once super important to her, and also bc he wants her to slay out there and at the same time he’s doing himself a favor by prettying it up hehe. He had a thing for undone long hair but he loves Marcille and when in the final chapters her hair was all messy the unfamiliar sight of it unsettled him, so besides just wanting her to get through the day without eating her hair and getting the urge to shave it all off, he also just does it because it feels so her and he remembers that side of her fondly (yes, even if that used to make her take even longer to get ready in the mornings).
Might surprise you might not but I think gifts are everything to him. Like the cowl from his daughter that he always wears, and all the mementos from his family we see he keeps in his room, like the dragon plush and the flower. Maybe they help him feel that the love people hold for him is real and exists/has existed at least at one point, maybe it’s about the memories, maybe it’s about being able to keep hanging onto them even after a relationship is over, idk!!!! But I think having gifts from his loved ones makes him feel like his life is fuller and warmer and like he always has some love surrounding him. For that reason he would super value gifts that Marcille would get for him. She overdoes it a bit and often gets him stuff for no particular occasions, mostly stuff that’s useful and that gets consumed so it’s not a problem or a bother though, but when it sticks it sticks, like a durable pair of gloves in a style he likes that she got for him. I don’t think photographs exist (at least not for the non-dwarves) but if they did oooh he’d be keeping stacks of them, would have some framed, he wouldn’t want people to know because he thinks he’d look corny but he wouuuuuld. He’d also have the "this reminds me of Marcille" moments when out into town, looking at jewelry or food that she likes (I imagine this is often the sort of gift/act of service he’d get for her, meals that he picked out because she loves them), but he’d also have the instinct to get her a gift on special occasions, and he’s s bit clumsy with it but he wants to make the item meaningful. He knows what she thinks is romantic, the woman has made plans for him to apologize to his wife with gifts after all, but he also knows that she loves gifts that scream "him" too so the man just doesn’t know what to do to make it as best as he could and he really doesn’t want to fuck it up. I think once he’d made a little metal sculpture-puzzle for her, like a little rabbit out of metal scraps, and he’d be so self-conscious about it but my god she’d adore it sooo much. It’d be cute if he got her a locket, even, and then with the help of imported dwarven technology they could get a picture of them or even all their friends into it and it becomes her most precious item for the following centuries. Ouuugh that’d make a sweet fic where he plans out a birthday party for her……
But yes yes, practical gifts… He knows she values ornamental useless things, unlike him, and though he doesn’t fully approve he also wants to do right by her so he’d go out of his comfort zone and find pretty gifts for her. I touch upon it a bit in my fic Grind Me Down Sweetly (named bc ground coffee beans & it’s meant to be like her slowly getting through the walls he built around himself :] Finding a newfound vulnerability with someone new but finding it soothing, sweet even if a lil bitter bc it’s coffee), and for example he gives her money for a favor she did for him as a friend. She doesn’t want to accept it, because to her doing something for her friend to help them out is more meaningful than getting rewarded for it, but for him respecting each other’s time and abilities is a big thing too. They end up compromising somewhat, because she then spends that money on gifts for him/them to share, so it ends up being a gift to the both of them for a shared effort~
Alrighty physical touch. In canon we see him get touched quite a lot, and when it isn’t patronizing or crowding (like others going to pet his head) he doesn’t seem to mind at all. But it’s a question of wether he’d enjoy it here. We don’t really saw that I think? He often doesn’t mind touching others but usually his touches have a practical purpose like pushing or pulling someone out of danger, and when it isn’t he doesn’t seem to enjoy it, like when Izutsumi sleeps in his bed. As far as I remember the only time we see him happy for touch beyond the few meaningful hugs like when he wanted the party to head back to the surface, was when his succubi were seducing him, sooo overall I get the feeling he’s not big on touch. Like being open with his feelings it’s something he’d keep for the more occasional time rather than something he does often. He is casual with touches but doesn’t give it out and seek it out naturally, so Marcille being very clingy’s not a problem, and as we see with Izutsumi always sleeping with him he’s ready to sacrifice his comfort for others too sometimes. I think being Marcille’s lover though I feel like he’d warm up to touches more, like she’d love to have him rest his head on her lap and to massage his scalp so eventually Chil looks forward to that as part of their routine and it relaxes him and feels right. I think he does like kissing, the routine goodbye peck feels warm and soothing, but with touch what he’d like the most would be making out and having sex and whatnot. Listen it’s super meaningful to him like, the peak of being vulnerable and naked and pouring out his emotions for someone for him. But yes she hangs onto his arm, holds his hand, goes to hug him from behind when he’s cooking, etc etc, and he doesn’t dislike it, but it’s not one of his love languages perse in that sense. It’s more that physical touches are a part of her, so he associates those with her, and so in a way he quite likes them, but it’s nit something he gravitates towards.
Words! I forget what I’ve mentioned already and what I haven’t oof, but yes Chilchuck values respect a lot, and with his last relationship he now values straightforward communication a lot. "If you want to leave me, at least please tell me first" style. But just with the way he is in canon too, where he hypes up his professional skills a lot, getting earned praised does mean something to him. Inversely, he devalues himself interpersonally quite a bit, calling himself a coward or selfish etc etc, and ultimately it’s Marcille telling him that he was a virtuous husband and that he may still have a shot with his wife that makes him see the glass half full and reflect on himself more positively! Remember what I said about Chilchuck first needing to value someone’s opinion before putting stock in their words? This is the canon moment that makes me feel the most like she earned that trust from him, he values what she says and her perspective. He knows her words aren’t empty and he’s able to trust in them more than he trusts his own judgement about himself. So yes yes, he loves getting told that he has qualities, that he’s skilled and manly and handsome and virtuous and kind, though he doesn’t need to be told "I love you" he’d still find it nice ofc. I say this because as I’ve said I think his way of being in a longterm relationship is soaking in the familiar casual soothing energy of it, he loves knowing her and noticing the little things (much like her with how she notices that he hates having to wait on someone for example), and he trusts her love in him, so he doesn’t feel like being told I love you is necessary, but it is a nice bonus.
And this is the bit where the post I linked at the beginning becomes especially relevant. I think Chilchuck shows his affection in subtle but thoughtful ways that showcase just how much they know each other, because to him love languages are less about proving how much love one holds for another but about defining the bond that they share, about quality more than quantity. He’s not one for big gestures, he just wants to feel connected with the person he’s with. Access intimacy, in-jokes, being protective/attack dogism, knowing the little details (Marcille’s favorite) and voluntary vulnerability… These truly ARE more in line with how Chilchuck shows his affection. And thus Marcille would see them for what they are and greatly value them as well.
Last points
… Help I forgot to talk about how teasing is like their whole thing lol
Ok so more concisely, Marcille will receive and give as much affection as she’s allowed, while Chilchuck needs to have the right setting right mood for it and makes more efforts for her sake to outwardly show it.
Edited in: Short section about pet names!! Chilchuck likes to call people by name and finds that in itself to be intimate but with half-foot names having ‘first names’ where Chilchuck’s is Chil, he might instinctively shorten it to Marci. Otherwise I’ve thought it’d fun if he gave bunny themed pet names teasingly, like his silly rabbit like the meme or harebrain rip, ‘bun’ would have the benefit of being related to food…
But also I could see him defaulting to calling her ‘love’, ESPECIALLY if they had a conversation about pet names and discussed it- it could be a more sustainable way for her to feel loved since he’s not regularly showing his affection outwardly much or saying "I love you", that’d be sooo sweet I think. They discussed pet names, and since he doesn’t regularly say "I love you" or show affection all that much, having him call her love as a pet name eases all of that and makes her feel so special and loved. He takes a bit of time to get used to it and not feel silly and self-conscious, but nowadays it slips off the tongue so easily.
How do they communicate their wants for affection:
Marcille will blatantly ask for it and/or make the first move herself, except for when she senses that Chil is tired and needs his space.
Chilchuck will blink in morse code, and Marcille will somehow understand (to his upmost relief and adoration). He’ll grab her sleeve subtly to ask for her attention and touch, wordlessly walk up to her and reach for her face to leave a tender kiss on her lips, quietly speak to her if he wants to tell her something. And, you know, the other half of the time he feels horny and on top of the world so he indulges her wants for big passionate gestures and being very blunt and forward about it.
What do they view as signs of affection:
They recognize each other’s way of showing affection well enough, but it’d be more about which signs they prefer I’d say. For example, Chilchuck does love getting smothered by her kisses and affection sometimes, but if it’s in public 99% of the time the embarrassment will win over, so it ends up meaning more to him that she doesn’t, that she holds back for his sake and she loves him enough to do that and she doesn’t blame him for it and she cares and she would stay with him even if he’s maybe flawed and- It means a lot!!! It’s like an act of service in that way.
They compromise and do acts of service sooo much for each other, like she hurries in her care routine so he doesn’t have to wait on her for long, but then he sees her get out ready with her hair a mess and he takes the time to tie it up nicely for her.
But yes Marcille overanalyzes everything and will seek out signs of affection into literally anything, but values whichever way to show affection she knows is hardest to do for Chil beyond the ones that feel so heartwarming because they just scream "Chil" to her. Meanwhile Chilchuck values her keeping in mind his boundaries, values her words and her being there for him, an unchanging fixture in his life offering him unconditional love through thick and thin. He values how well they know and understand each other, and how they communicate when things don’t feel as easy. Like, you know, when one of them becomes a dungeon lord and threatens humanity for example.
The compromises that being in a romantic relationship inevitably brings, and having to put some efforts to understand the other person and better the relationship, are points at the heart of Chilchuck’s plot with his wife imo. With the bicorn chapter, Marcille and Chilchuck have already hashed out a lot of their differences and come to a deeper understanding, so I’d say they’re halfway there to making it work :) Oohh what if I gave you hope in the world sometimes being a good bright p’ace where things can go right and love can be fulfilling and rewarding, and what if you gave me a concrete real example of the virtuous man figure that I’ve always idealized in books even if no one real can be as flawless, and the compromise both our outlooks on lives mixed to make made something beautiful and productive…
A bit like how the sweet & salty sandwich feels like an ill-fitting mix of ingredients but still tastes surprisingly good… Like perhaps a sweet woman and a sour man would go well together after all.
I’ll share this lil marchil song analysis @thatsmimi did once of Soap by The Oh Hellos to be the note I leave this post on~
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Unsure and Unconventional, to say the least (Ted Lasso Fic)
Author's note: because the Uncle's Day scenes made me think a lot of things. Phoebe would have Jamie wrapped around her finger in like .01 seconds. They would be a mischievous duo. And the team would be like awww that's cute.
Parts of this fic partially Inspired by:
an answered ask (HERE) by @andfrecklesandyoursmile about Roy giving his sister Jamie's contact for "emergencies".
@politelymenacing did a post that (THIS ONE) That may have helped inspire some dialog.
So credit to those brilliant post.
Ted Lasso Masterlist
OT3 Roy/Keeley/Jamie Romantic ship. Platonic team dynamics.
Content warning: Cursing/Swearing (lots of it because Roy Kent is gonna Roy Kent), Mentions of abuse, Mentions of physical violence, Mentions of hospitals, Self-Esteem Issues (because Jamie Tartt...), Polyamory, Anxiety, Anger Issues, Fear.
Word count: 8k+ (this one got away from me and that is why it took days to finish)
Read on AO3 here
Unsure and Unconventional, to say the least
“Coach?” Will says as he nears Roy Kent as the coach oversees training on the pitch. “Someone’s here to see you. They’re in the office.”
Roy’s brows furrow. He wasn’t expecting anyone. Keeley would have just come out and joined them on the sidelines. He grunts in acknowledgment and heads inside.
“Uncle Roy!” he hears as soon as he reaches the doorway.
“Phoebe?” He says, accepting the little girl’s hug when she reaches him. He looks over to see his sister talking to Trent Crimm. Trent Crimm moves to the doorway. Stopping to offer to take Phoebe so she could say hi to the team.
“Can I please, Uncle Roy? I want to say hi to Jamie,” Phoebe looks up at him with those big eyes he just can’t say no to, or at least say no and mean it. He looks to his sister, who shrugs.
“What? They're friends now too,” his sister says, challenge clear in her tone. “That a problem, Roy?”
Trent watches the Kent siblings with silent interest. Phoebe practically buzzed with excitement as she waits for an answer next to him.
“A 25-year-old prick cannot be friends with an 8-year-old girl,” Roy glares.
“That bridge is long crossed, dear brother,” she laughs. “Especially after Uncle's day.”
“Uncle's day?” Trent asks with a grin.
“Fuck off, Crimm,” Roy grunts. His sister just gives him a fond and familiar look. “Fine,” Roy relents. “You can go say hi to Jamie, but stay out of the line of play. And don’t-”
But she is already gone, an amused Trent following close behind. Phoebe tells him all about Uncle's day as she goes.
His sister grins. “She’s just going to bother Jamie. Thought you’d at least find that amusing.”
Roy grunts. “Too bad the prick will enjoy it.” Roy winces it. “That just sounds so fucked up.”
“You make it sound so wrong that she likes your friends,” his sister says. “That you think the people you have surrounded yourselves with are criminals.”
“How would you know if they are or aren’t?” he glares at her.
“Because you’d have kicked them in the teeth and sent them packing if they were. Jamie Tartt might be a prick, but even I know he’d probably die before letting anything happen to Phoe, especially if his childhood was half as shit as you’ve said. And he can’t be a complete twat if he sat through the whole of Uncle's day.” She grins.
“Alright, cut the shit. What’s wrong?” He is quick to change the topic. “I know you’re not here to talk about Jamie fucking Tartt?”
“You sure about that?” She raises a brow. He growls. “Fine, I need you to take her this weekend. One of my colleagues was supposed to speak at a conference, and the prick went and caught something on holiday.”
“So now you have to go?” he asks.
“Fuck no,” she says. “I’m covering for the poor bastard that does, which means I’m working a double.”
“Fuck that,” Roy says, annoyed on her behalf.
“I know you have a match, and this might ruin your plans with Keeley-" she starts, but he doesn't care what else she has to say.
“Fuck off. It’s fine. We’ll take her,” Roy doesn’t even hesitate to say. “Kid always comes first. You know that.”
“I know,” she nods. "Thanks."
"You don't need to fucking thank me," he states.
"I don't, but I'm still going to, you fucking prick," she says fondly. "Every time, no matter how much you curse or growl."
"You could have just texted me," Roy says.
"Yeah, but then I couldn't ruin your whole day by asking you the same question you have avoided answering. Can't avoid it in person."
Roy growls, and his glare intensifies. Most people would probably hesitate to continue. Or even hurry to leave. Not his sister. She was used to Roy's behavior decades ago. Roy would kill for his sister. Die for Phoebe. And he'd do it happily. She knew that.
"Roy, you can't just ignore your feelings forever." She holds a hand up to stop whatever argument he was about to make. "You can, and you probably would. I know you, Roy. I know that you-"
"Don't," he cautions. She sighs.
"You might think that you're hurting just yourself here, but you're not. And that's not fair to anyone." She doesn’t drop specific names because she doesn’t want to risk anyone hearing the specifics. And she knows there isn't any point in pushing more now. "And I know you don't actually want to hurt him. You'll make the right call eventually." She grins. Before heading in the direction of the tunnel out to the pitch.
"You're lucky that you're my sister," he growls when he catches up to her.
"And that you love us, I know," she bumps her shoulder against his. He hums more than he grunts for once as he walks. He gives into that voice in the back of his head that he used to always ignore when in public, even if it's just the dog track on a training day. He puts his arm around her shoulder and pulls her into a half hug as they walk. God, she might be a pain in the arse, but he loved his sister and her kid. He may have smiled just a little as she returned the gesture.
"You know I'm just trying to look out for you. Like you always do us," she says as they walk out of the tunnel toward the pitch. "You may think you're happy now, just think how much better it could be."
"You spend too much time with Keeley, and she spends too much time with Ted and Rebecca," he laments.
"I'm just glad we finally get to spend time with your friends. Richmond really has brought the best out of that boy from Chelsea that kicked Brock Lorens' arse at the commons."
"Do it again, too," Roy grunts. "Fucking deserved it."
"He was a bellend," she grins.
"He gave you a black eye. That's not a bellend. That's a fucker with a death wish."
"Who has a death wish now?" Ted asks as they reach them. Roy drops his arm as they do. "Hey there, Doc." Ted greets her.
"Coach Lasso, Crimm," she nods. "Coach Beard." He responds with a nod.
She turns her attention back to Ted as he speaks. "Glad to see you outside the ER, or is it ED here? Heh, that always sounds so odd to me. ED means something very different where I'm from," Ted says. "Probably just nice to get out of those scrubs. Those always seemed so starchy," he continues earning an amused look from her and a growl from Roy.
"It is nice to meet in a less sterile but just as chaotic environment," she says. Her brother has warned her to pretty much ignore most of what Ted Lasso says. She looks out to where Phoebe has seemed to draw the attention of most of the Richmond team. "Hopefully, my daughter hasn't caused too much commotion."
"Aw, the boys could always use a bit of a break," Ted assures her. "No harm, no foul."
She chuckles as a player, one she recognizes as Dani Rojas gives Phoebe a bear hug that lifts her feet off the ground. Phoebe's laughter carried across the pitch. Her brother grunts. She knew she was pushing it the longer they hung around. Her brother used to keep his professional and personal lives separate. Didn't like the way his teammates would look at her. This team was different. He seemed to trust them a lot more. And she could seem to see why. But she was still playing a dangerous game, treading on her brother's nerves. He takes his job very seriously, and they were disrupting it.
"Should probably let you lot get back to it."
"Well, go on, coach," Ted says to Roy. "Know you want to."
His sister is smart enough to step away. Moving closer to Ted and Beard. Doesn't even flinch when Roy shouts. "Oi! This is training, not a fucking playdate! Put her down and get back to your fucking drills!” She just shakes her head.
"Been dying to ask," Ted keeps his voice low as he leans towards her. "He always been like that?"
"He's been Roy Fucking Kent since the day he was born," she says with a grin. "But he has his moments. You can say he was a very protective older brother. Don't know why I said was. Still very much is."
"Like dealing with whoever had that death wish?" Ted asks, low tone forgotten.
"Fuckin' Lorens. I'd smash his face in if he showed that ugly mug around here," Roy grumbles.
"Again?" His sister smirks.
"Yes, again. Fucking twat." Roy growls.
Ted looked between the Kent siblings. "That bad, huh?"
"No one lays a hand on either one of them if they want to keep it," Roy states.
"What did you tell his mates the next day when they threatened to go to the teachers?" She grins.
"To fucking do it," Roy says. "That I'd give them a detailed list of every fucking thing they'd ever done to any kid in her class."
"He then listed them, chronologically accurate."
"Then told those fucks that if they even breathed at my sister wrong, their teeth would be in the pavement."
"Wow," was all Ted could say.
"So yes, Coach Lasso, I can assure you, he has always been some version of this Roy Fucking Kent."
"Fucking, right," Roy says.
"And yes, I got more first aid training patching up his sorry arse after fights than I did in medical school."
*-*-*-*
(Earlier during training…)
Jamie’s head snapped up when the pitch goes quiet. He had stopped to stretch out an annoying knot in his hamstring. The striker wondered why drills had stopped despite no whistle. Not even Roy’s shout of it. He looked up at his teammates, Sam and Jan being the closest. Sam was grinning. Then something collides with his back. He immediately tensed up until small arms snaked around his neck. Jamie let out the breath he was holding and huffs a laugh.
“Just gonna run right out an’ tackle me, Phoebs?” Jamie laughs.
“Keeley says you like hugs,” Phoebe says in his ear.
“Especially, Phoebe-shaped ones,” he says with a nod. He reaches around with one arm to anchor her to him as he shifts to stand up. Earning a few curious looks from his teammates. Jamie couldn’t have possibly cared less. When he is on his feet, he reaches up with his other arm to keep hers secure around his neck. He spins her around. She laughs. It’s an infectious noise that causes a few of his teammates to chuckle. When he stops, Phoebe giggles and says she’s dizzy now. He goes to let her down, but her grip only tightens. He can’t help but smile.
“Wouldn’t be the first time someone got sick on the pitch,” Sam says.
“Roy would love that,” Colin says as he and others join them, all of training seemingly unofficially put on hold.
“Speakin’ of,” Jamie starts as he makes exaggerated motions as he turns to look around. Phoebe laughs as he swings her around. “Where is the grumpy prick?” Jamie asks having not seen the man. Phoebe giggles, but before she can chastise him for his language, he adds, “Yeah, I know, it’s a bad word, innit? Pay ya next time.” His teammates laugh. He feels her nod more than sees it.
“Mum said she needed to talk to him and that I could come say hi,” Phoebe tells him.
“Well, hi,” Jamie says.
“Hi,” she laughs.
“Say hi to the lads, Phoebs,” Jamie grins.
“Hi lads,” she parrots, earning amused greetings from the now bigger group of players.
“You here for more than Jamie hugs?” Sam asks.
“Do you want a hug?” Phoebe asks, and the others laugh.
"I did not mean-" Sam starts to say but is cut off by Jamie.
“I’m sure the lads wouldn’t turn one down,” Jamie grins. Phoebe shifts, and Jamie lets her down. Sam does indeed accept a hug. A few of the others do too. Dani Rojas makes her laugh by picking her up off her feet and swinging her around.
“Oi!” They hear from the side of the pitch. “This is training, not a fucking playdate! Put her down and get back to your fucking drills!”
“Sorry, Uncle Roy,” Phoebe says at the same time the others say, “Yes, Coach.” Jamie just huffs, scoops her up and jogs them over, and sets Phoebe down on the sideline by her mom and uncle.
"Lovely as ever, Doc," Jamie winks, greeting Roy's sister.
"Charming as always, Tartt," she returns. Roy growls. "Alright. Steady on," she says, patting Roy's arm. "Say goodbye to Jamie and the coaches, Phoe."
"Bye, Jamie. Bye, Coach and Coach." She hugs Roy. "Bye, Uncle Roy."
"See you this weekend," Roy tells her as he hugs her back.
"Think about what I said," his sister says in a low tone to Roy, glancing at Jamie as she does. Jamie gives her a confused look, but she just grins as she pulls away. "Laters team," she says louder to the group. She takes Phoebe's hand and leaves.
*-*-*-*
“She’s gonna be a heartbreaker that gets legs broken,” Isaac says to the group as they watch the interaction on the sidelines.
“And that’d be the lucky ones Coach likes,” Colin adds.
“Not just Coach,” Sam mutters.
“Nah, Tartt would aim for faces,” Isaac says. “Kent would make sure no one’s walking away, but Tartt knows too well how they think. No helpin’ the ones that break her heart.”
“Make the outside match the inside,” Colin nods. “Break her heart, and they’ll be lucky if those two break their face.” A few of the players grimace, and the others nod in agreement.
“Fucking get to it, or you’re all running laps til I say so!” Roy shouts.
Jamie shakes his head as he joins them. “Might want to hustle, lads,” Jamie smirks. “As soon as she’s gone, he’ll run ya til you’re the ones sick on the pitch.”
“Yeah, alright,” Isaac says. “Back to it.”
They all head back to drills.
*-*-*-*
Roy is not surprised, but still annoyed, to find Jamie waiting for him after training. The locker room is empty but for Jamie. Roy resists the urge to go back into the office, but he knows Jamie would just keep waiting. Jamie was already in his street clothes, scrolling through his phone, and sitting like the fucking prick never learned how to properly use a chair.
"What the fuck are you still doing here?" Roy asks.
"Took ya long enough," Jamie says, getting to his feet. "So your sister-"
"Don't even think about it, Tartt," Roy growls.
Jamie holds his hands up at the sheer rage in Roy's tone, but he doesn't flinch or back away. "I wasn't gonna say anything like that, fuckin hell."
"Then what?"
"Just wonderin' why they dropped by. Not usually her thing," Jamie says. "Gotta be important to drop by in person, no text or shit."
Roy knew he had a point. He'd been concerned himself when Phoebe had run up to him. The only reason he hadn't been scared shitless that something was wrong was that no one was in tears, or as much as in tears that any of the Kents get. That image was seared in his brain from when that no good waste of space ex of hers left them.
"They're fine," Roy says as they head out to the car park.
"So we don't need to hide a body or slash any tires?" Jamie asks. If Roy didn't know any better, he would have thought Jamie sounded disappointed. When Roy doesn't say anything, Jamie looks up at him. "What?" Jamie asks. "Phoebe seemed fine, so I thought maybe-"
"Since when do you have thoughts about my sister? Since when do you have thoughts?!"
Jamie rolls his eyes. "Excuse me for giving a shit about your life and family."
Roy sighs. "Phoebe is fine. My sister, she is fine. She has to work a double this weekend and needs someone to watch Phoebe."
"I can-"
"No, you cannot," Roy stops walking as he reaches his car. "You have a match."
"So do you, Coach," Jamie counters.
"Well aware," Roy says. "She'll be in the box with Keeley."
"She'll love that," Jamie grins.
"Like I said, they're fine, so go home, Tartt."
*-*-*-*
"There she is!" Jamie says, picking Phoebe up in a hug and setting her feet on the bench so she was out of the usual chaos of the locker room. He glanced around. Everyone was still riding the high of winning the match. "Have fun with Keeley in the owner's box?"
"Yes!" Phoebe was quick to answer. Jamie did his best to keep her focus on him. He usually wouldn't give a shit about his team's manners. Even when it was Keeley or Ms. Welton in the room, Phoebe is 8. She's an innocent kid.
"Tell me about it," he says as he puts on a new shirt. Thankful that Keeley must have timed it so most of them would be wrapping up in the locker room by the time Phoebe got there. She starts telling him all about watching the game.
"You scored a goal!" Phoebe beams at him. Jamie can't help but smile.
Cockburn chuckles as he closes his cubby.
"Colin did, too," Jamie says.
"Keeley said you helped then, too," Phoebe says.
"That's what teammates do, Phoebs, you know that. You play on your own team."
"Less fun now that Uncle Roy coaches you," she says. A chorus of awws has Jamie looking over his shoulder. A few of the players were hovering.
"I'm sure your uncle misses coaching you, too," Sam says as he approaches.
"Richmond pays better," Jan states. "Would be silly to pick a children's league over-"
"Fuck off, Jan Maas," Jamie grumbles. "She's 8, and he still coaches her team when he can."
"Jamie…" Phoebe says, and she holds out her hand. Jamie feigns annoyance as he moves around the edge of the bench. He does reach up and put a hand on her arm to make sure she doesn't get knocked off balance by his movements. He gets his wallet out of his bag and hands her the money. She gestures again. He rolls his eyes and more money that he owes her from training.
"Good," Phoebe smiles. The teammates around him laugh. Phoebe clearly had Jamie wrapped around her finger.
"Yeah, yeah, laugh it up," Jamie tells them. "She'll get you, too, if you don't watch your language." He grins at Phoebe. "Still think you should cash Uncle Roy's debt in for a pony," he says with a wink.
"Better!" Dani says excitedly. "A puppy."
"How is a puppy better than a pony? I thought most little girls wanted a pony." Sam asks.
"You watch too many movies," Colin says. "Kitten, get a kitten. Less maintenance for your poor ma."
"Just what she needs, a grumpy black cat to match her grumpy and gloomy uncle," Jamie grins.
"Maybe smaller l, like a guinea pig or a-"
"No one is getting her a pet," Roy grunts.
"Uncle Roy!" She reaches out for him from where she stands on the bench. Half the team looks like they are about to try and catch her if she falls. Sam actually reaches out.
"Mate, she's 8 and plays football. She's fine," Jamie rolls his eyes but grins. She's safer in this locker room than probably anywhere else.
Roy steps up into the spot Jamie had been in before he moved over to the other side of the bench.
"Uh huh," Sam says. "And yet you braced her when you rounded the bench."
"He did put her up there," Dani points out.
"Fewer elbows and…other things in her eye line up there," Jamie says. "I'm not driving her to therapy."
"You would," both Sam and Dani laugh.
Roy shakes his head and looks at Phoebe. "Ready to go?" He asks.
"Keeley said we could get ice cream," She says. Roy is not surprised.
"If Keeley said so," Roy states. Earning a few murmurs from the room. Roy growls. Phoebe seems unphased.
"Can Jamie come too?" She asks.
"Yeah, coach, can Jamie come too?" Jamie smirks as he leans against the divider between his and Canterbury's compartments. Roy ignores him.
"You can ask him yourself, Phoebe. He's your friend, apparently."
"I still think he's your best friend," Phoebe says. Yeah, Roy left the door open for that one. That was on him.
"Yet he says it’s Isaac," Roy attempts to deflect the attention her statement got him.
"You wish," Isaac laughs.
"Get your own best friend, Tartt," Colin agrees.
"That's just ridiculous. It's clearly, Sam. Did you not see the international matches?" Reynolds says.
"He can have more than one best friend, can't he?" Dani asks. "I do."
"Of course you do," Jamie chuckles as he makes sure he has everything he needs to leave. He looks up and when Phoebe calls his name.
"Want to get ice cream with us, Jamie?" He glances at Roy. Roy rolls his eyes and shrugs.
"O' course, Phoebs," Jamie says. His smile softens. "Love to."
"Then get your arse moving, don't have all damn night." Roy helps Phoebe off the bench, and they head out the door.
"She's right," Sam says. "They're clearly best friends."
Everyone in the locker room murmurs in agreement.
"Is Tartt with her mum or something?" Someone asks.
"God no," Sam says. "He'd be dead if was."
"Fair point," Isaac says.
"But Jamie Tartt isn't the old Jamie Tartt," Dani counters.
"Yeah," Colin says. "But Roy Kent is still Roy Kent. He'd have destroyed Tartt for that."
"He has threatened to kill Tartt for a lot less," Sam admits.
"Yeah," the others agree.
*-*-*-*
"Glare any harder, and you might melt the cone with the heat of it," Keeley nudges Roy as she says it. Roy blinks before looking over at her. She is obviously amused by how he is acting.
"How is this not weird to you?" Roy says in a harsh whisper. Glancing over at where Phoebe is knocking around a balled-up wrapper as a ball on the tabletop nearby. She and Jamie had been seeing how long they could keep it going without it hitting the floor. It gets oddly competitive when it shifts to who can get it between two napkin dispensers more while not letting their ice cream melt. It only got worse once their ice cream was gone. Though Roy found it as funny as Phoebe did when Jamie got a brain freeze from it.
"It's like minding two children," Roy complains.
"Would you rather have to entertain her yourself?" Keeley asks. Roy just grunts. Phoebe cheers when she lands her last shot.
"Well played," Jamie grins and looks over at Roy. "Almost done, old man?" Roy has to resist making an inappropriate comeback. There are children, not just Phoebe, around. And normally, Roy doesn't give a fuck what people think about him. But he wasn’t actually that upset about anything. Jamie had actually gone out of his way to look after Phoebe in the locker room. He'd watched them through the window in the office while talking to Beard about the match. He could tell Jamie was trying to keep her focus on him and not the room full of half-dressed footballers. And in the past, he might have thought he was just being an attention needing twat, but Jamie had been keeping track of who was where in the room. Keeping himself between her and the rest of the room. So he'd give him a bit more leeway. And Keeley was right. Phoebe was having fun. They still have another day to keep her busy. Having Jamie keep her busy for a bit hasn't done any harm. Instead of saying anything, he just finishes his ice cream cone and gets up. He holds a hand out to Keeley, and she takes it as she gets up. "Let's go."
"Thanks for the invite," Jamie says to Phoebe as they walk back to Nelson Road. Jamie giving her a piggyback ride. She smiles, shifting so she can pat his head. He laughs. So does Keeley. "You too, granddad." He says to Roy when the laughter dies down. Roy does roll his eyes at that. Roy wonders how this became his life. And that thought made him wonder if this was a good thing or a bad thing. His gut reaction is, of course, it's bad. Jamie is the king prick of pricks. But he knows that's not true anymore. Jamie had picked to go with them to ice cream instead of the club to celebrate with the team. Jamie'd rather spend his time entertaining Roy's 8-year-old niece at an ice cream parlor while Roy and Keeley enjoyed their own treats than party with the boys. Or even find a casual hook-up like the old Jamie would probably do. No. Instead, he was carrying a sugar-fueled child on his back despite it being less than an hour out from playing a full football match. Roy's knee would have been protesting if it was him. They stop when they reach Keeley's car.
"What are you doing now?" Phoebe asks Jamie when he lets her down.
"He should go home. Rest and recover," Roy says.
"Not going to join the team at the club?" Keeley asks.
He shrugs. "Just going to head home. Catch up on something streaming."
"Nothing fun?" Phoebe asks.
"You heard Coach Uncle Roy," he grinned. "Gotta recover."
Phoebe gives him a hug, and he heads to his car.
*-*-*-*
After Phoebe is down for the night, Keeley hands Roy a beer. "You going to tell me what is going on, or am I going to have to just wait it out until you crack up?"
Roy considers ignoring her question, but he knows she will just bring it up again later.
"Just something my sister has been bothering me about," he says.
"Do I get specifics, or am I just to go off that vague nothing of a sentence?"
Roy huffs. "She's been on my case about Jamie."
"What about Jamie?" That piqued her interest. "Does your sister want to shag Jamie Tartt?"
"Fuck off." He cringes at the idea. "I hope not."
"Okay, then what is she on about?"
Roy has not been able to figure out how to say that part out loud. Especially to Keeley. They are barely back together, and Jamie is her ex. She still cares for Jamie, and Jamie has never denied he still loves Keeley in one way or another. Jamie maintains he's glad the two got back together. He had told Roy he was a dumb fuck of an old man and even dumber than Jamie himself was for dumping Keeley. Roy had agreed with at least part of Jamie's assessment on that. He had fucked up by pushing Keeley away. But Jamie had been there to keep Roy out of his head. Even if he was just pushing his buttons to give him a vent for his frustration. Filing the silence in training with annoying factoids that seemed infuriating at the time, but looking back, were just keeping his mind focused on something else. Roy hadn't realized how much he had leaned on Jamie. He had gotten to the point he'd started noticing stupid little things that Jamie would appreciate when Jamie wasn’t even around. Whether it was some stupid video on the internet or someone else's fuck up that he knew they could both find amusing. Fuck this was frustrating to think about. His mind had been drifting more and more to Jamie Tartt during the quiet moments of his life.
"Roy?" Keeley shakes his shoulders. He grunts. "Now I know something is up. Spill it."
Roy growls, not at her but at his own stupidity. Keeley just waits him out.
So he tells her about his sister's visit to Nelson Road. About how she had been questioning him about his feelings for Jamie since Uncle's day. Keeley is damn near giddy by the time he finishes talking.
"You love Jamie," she grins.
"I love you," he counters.
"And Jamie!"
"Would you fucking shut it," he hisses. He glances over at the stairs and silently waits to see if he hears Phoebe. Keeley glares at him. And he knows he fucked up. That had been too harsh. "Sorry, that was-"
"A bit harsh, yeah?" She takes a pull of her drink. "You're lucky I love you."
"I am," he admits. "But I'd rather not Phoebe hear this."
"But you haven't denied you love Jamie."
Roy groans, rubbing his eyes.
"You can't, can you?" Keeley grins. "You can love more than one person. The heart is a bitch like that."
"Keeley," he grumbles.
"You aren't the only one," she admits.
"What?" Roy asks.
"It's like…” she starts to explain. “He's kept all the sweet things I genuinely enjoyed when I was him and grew out of most, if not all, the bad bits."
"He's changed so much," Roy agrees. "And I don't know if that's endearing or infuriating."
"Well, you love him, so clearly, you have your answer."
"You just admitted you still love him too."
"Yeah, but I loved him before. It's new for you."
"Well, what the fuck are we going to do about it?" He asks.
"Honestly?"
"Yes," he growls.
"Drag him to the bed and settle it the fun ways," she says, taking a drink.
"Fuck off," Roy growls.
"I'm serious, babe," Keeley says. "He went to get ice cream instead of clubbing with the fellas. He asked if he needed to help you murder someone. He'd risk his career for you. He is ready and waiting for you at insane hours of the day already. He had a poster of you in his room as a kid. Admitted he loved watching you play. He still looks at you like you're his hero. Like he can't believe you would let him have even a fraction of your time and attention. Roy, he cares what you think. He lights up like the sun when you tell him he did a good job. Can you really not see how much he wants your approval? Your attention? Good or bad, he lives for it."
Roy has to look away as she speaks. That was a hell of a list. How has he missed it all?
"So you think he'd-" he slowly starts to say.
"If we texted him right now,” she interrupts him. “I guarantee he'd be here in minutes. If you asked him to do anything, he would."
"I doubt that," Roy vocalizes the little voice in his brain. The one that doubts most everything.
"Fine, I'll prove it." She grabs her phone and starts typing a message.
"What are you-"
"There. Done," she sends a message.
"What did you just do?" Roy asks, dread pooling in his stomach.
"Invited him tomorrow night," She says.
He is slightly relieved she hadn't invited him to come round now.
*-*-*-*
Jamie has the worst timing when not on the pitch. During training, during a match, he is a master at timing shots. He knows when and where to strike. As for his life outside the pitch, that has been a mess since, probably forever. Like now, he’s just kicked back on his sofa, tv on for mostly just background noise as he scrolls through social media and other sites on his phone. The match had been good. He was sending some of the best reactions and headlines to the team chat as he does. He had just taken a drink because Roy would probably kill him if he didn’t hydrate when he got a text from Keeley. He opened it and choked on his drink. He ended up coughing so hard his eyes watered. She told him to come round tomorrow night. That they had something important to talk to him about. Jamie’s chest hurts, and it isn’t entirely from the coughing fit he just had. Did he do something wrong? He thought they had a good time earlier, and it wasn’t even an inappropriate or raunchy good time. It was kid friendly. He kept Phoebe happy and safe. Isn’t that like Roy’s number one priority? Always. And Jamie is happy to help with that. Did he do too much? Or is it the whole locker room thing? She had found him there. He’d kept her from seeing anything she’d need therapy to forget. Was it something he didn’t do? The lads wouldn’t mess with her. They fear Roy far too much. But Roy didn’t scare him as much as he might have in the past. But fear wasn't his motivating factor for once. Jamie wanted to look after Phoebe because she was just a kid. She deserved to feel safe and happy. Roy might hate that Phoebe’s dad is not in the picture, but Jamie knows there are worse things than an absent father. An abusive one that resents your very existence. One that you can’t get away from. A dad like that is something he hopes Phoebe never has to even think about. He hopes her friends, classmates, teammates, all of them never have to go through what Jamie did. What Jamie still has to deal with. But Phoebe has Roy, at least. She doesn’t need a father. She has her mother. She has her Uncle Roy. She even has Keeley and now Jamie. The more people in her corner is a good thing, right? So it can’t be about all that, right? Then what else could it be? It’s Keeley, so it’s probably not about the match or training. He looks at the message again. He probably is taking too long to respond. So he sends her a message saying he’d be there and sets his phone on the table. So much for rest and recovery. He knows his dumb brain is not going to let this go.
*-*-*-*
"Phoebe go home?" Jamie asks when Keeley lets him in.
"Yeah, disappointed?" Keeley asks.
Jamie shrugs, aiming for nonchalant but coming off as anxious and a bit exhausted.
"Roy's in there," she gestures past the stairs to the living room. Jamie still seems to hesitate. "I'm right behind you, babe."
Roy notices it immediately. Something was not right with Jamie. That was clear as day as Jamie made his way into Keeley’s living room. The striker looked more exhausted now than he had when they watched him leave the Nelson Road car park.
“Are you okay?” Keeley finally asks as she follows the younger man.
Jamie waves it off. "I'm fine," he insists.
“Don't exactly look it. You end up out with the team after you left?” Roy asks.
“Nah, went home, just shit sleep,” Jamie attempts to shrug it off as nothing. He was not going to tell them his brain was thinking of a million ways this conversation could end badly for him. "Been worse, yeah?"
“Nightmares?” Keeley asks. Jamie shakes his head.
“It wasn’t your dad was it?” Roy asks. One of these days he was going to make James Tartt, Sr. pay for what he's done. All the shit he put his son through. That line of thinking is cut off for now as Jamie speaks.
“Wasn’t him. Wasn’t anyone, really. It’s nothin’,” he insists. “You’re the ones with something important to discuss.” Keeley looks at Roy before looking back to Jamie. Her brows furrow.
“How about tea,” Roy says before turning toward the kitchen. "Already started, shouldn't take long."
Keeley drags Jamie to the sofa and makes him sit as Roy leaves the room. She sits beside him. She frowns again when he puts more space between them by moving to the end of the sofa. Or at least as far as he can with her insane amount of throw pillows. That doesn't sit well with her. He looks so uneasy. Jamie used to act like he owned the place when he came over. Sure he was less of a prick the last few times, but this was not even how the new Jamie usually was with her. “Jamie…were you worried about this?” She gestures between Jamie and herself. "About this talk?" Jamie doesn’t answer beyond a shrug. "You aren’t in trouble or anything, babe.”
“I didn’t say that I thought I was,” Jamie tries to argue. His guard was up. He didn't want to feel stupid or look weak having worried over something this…well he wouldn't say insignificant. She had said it was important.
“Didn’t say you didn’t either,” Keeley counters. And he knew she had him there. The old part of Jamie that still pops up in his brain sometimes tells him to play it off as if he didn’t actually care. Or to just be a prick. But he doesn’t really want to do that. He’s not going to turn it on her and make her feel bad because his brain jumps to worst-case scenarios. He sighs and leans back until his head is resting on the back of the sofa, and he’s staring at the ceiling.
“Sorry,” He says but avoids looking at her. “You said it was important, and my brain ran with it.”
“Jamie,” she shifts, half kneeling on the sofa, and bracing her hand on his shoulder to try and get him to look at her. “Yes, what we want to talk about is important. But it's not bad.” “So I didn’t do something wrong, didn’t fuck anything up yesterday?” She goes to run her fingers through his hair to soothe him but she stops when she feels him tense up as he speaks.
“What?” Roy asks as he sets down a tray with steaming mugs of tea on the coffee table. “Match was a win. You played well, and went for ice cream. What would you have fucked up?”
“That’s what I couldn’t figure out,” Jamie admits, finally looking at them.
“So you’re saying you got a text from us, saying we wanted to talk to you about something,” Roy starts as he hands Jamie his tea.
“Important. Something important.” Jamie adds as he takes the mug.
“Okay, something important. And you assumed we were mad at you for something?” Roy is still trying to figure out where this is coming from.
“I mean, you’re usually mad about something,” Jamie states. “Wouldn't be you if you weren’t.”
Keeley tries not to grin but fails. Roy grunts. “Fair enough.”
“But I’m not,” Keeley says.
“Usually are with me, and that’s fair. I’ve fucked up a lot since you’ve known me,” Jamie counters.
“That was before,” Keeley says without hesitation. “That was a very different you, babe. Nowadays, you’re more likely to apologize for something you had zero control over than for something you actually did. And that’s assuming you’d have anything to actually apologize for in the first place.”
“Which you don’t,” Roy reiterates. “You train your arse off and barely complain about it anymore. You look after your mates. Keep ‘em in line if needed. You spent yesterday holding court for a stadium full of people and who knows how many more on live tv, then entertaining an 8-year-old at an ice cream parlor. How could I be mad at you?”
“You’re Roy fuckin Kent. Ya can usually find something,” Jamie states.
“Well, I’m not. Got it?” Roy says. “I’m not mad. But I will be if you keep being a prick.”
“Roy,” Keeley glares at him.
“What? I don’t want to be mad about anything, not right now, at least. Not with what we were going to talk about. Anxious, of fucking course. Angry, no.”
“Why are you anxious if it isn’t a bad thing?” Jamie asks. Now clearly confused.
“Because what we are going to ask you is not something people would consider normal,” Keeley answers.
“Not bad, but not normal?” Jamie tries to sort it out.
“Exactly. It’s unconventional, but could be fun,” Keeley grins, moving back to start carding her fingers through his longer hair. Ever since he had grown it out her fingers had itched to touch it. Style it. Just feel Jamie melt under her touch again as her nails scrape his scalp. This time, he lets her. He holds himself back from going completely to mush under her touch, but he doesn't fight how comforting it is. Keeley and Roy see it as a win. She can help but smile at them.
“So? What is it?” Jamie has to ask, his tone and his body language now showing he is less guarded and much more comfortable.
Keeley and Roy exchange a look.
“You want to say it or…” Keeley initiates.
“Don’t look at me,” Roy huffs. “This was your idea.”
“And you agreed to it,” Keeley insists.
“Because you-”
“Seems a bit bad if you can’t even say it,” Jamie points out. “Gonna keep going roundabout all night? If so, might need to order takeaway at this rate.”
Roy glares at him, but the prick has a point. He takes a drink if his tea to stall for time.
“We want you to join us,” Keeley says.
“Join you where? I’m already here,” Jamie says, his mind is too distracted by the feel of her fingers along his scalp to look deeper at Keeley's statement.
Roy rolls his eyes. Sometimes he forgets how direct you have to be with Jamie. Subtlety and nuance are often lost on Jamie Tartt. He is a genius on the pitch. And he knows a lot of shit about topic Roy couldn’t even imagine knowing anything about. But sometimes, he misses the obvious points. And as frustrating as it might be at times, Roy still finds himself wanting to protect this one particular idiot more than any other and help him. Teach him. Fuck, Roy was absolutely lost on Jamie fucking Tartt. Unfortunately, he, too, had been anxious about this conversation all damn day and was on his last nerve.
“For fuck’s sake, Tartt,” Roy sighs.
“What did I do?” Jamie starts to get defensive, pulling away from Keeley to look better at Roy.
“Steady on,” Keeley levels Roy with a serious look. She puts a hand on Jamie’s chest. “We mean with us, like in our relationship, not just at our place physically.”
Jamie is pretty sure his brain has short circuited. He cannot have heard what he thinks he just did. He looks back and forth between the two of them. “You…you’re serious?” he asks.
“Yeah,” Keeley says, smiling at him. Roy nods, hesitant to say anything that might ruin anything. He’s screwed up his relationships too many times. He’ll leave this to Keeley.
“Me?” Jamie asks. “You want me…”
“Yes,” Keeley affirms.
“You both do?”
“Yes,” Keeley repeats. “We both do, right, Roy?” She looks at Roy, eyes pleading for him to at least act like he isn’t a total prick.
Roy grunts but adds. “Wouldn’t have brought it up if we didn’t.”
“Like a one-time thing or…" Jamie says. He still can’t believe it.
“Fuck off,” Roy grimaces.
Keeley shifts so she has both hands on Jamie’s chest. “No, Jamie. Not a one-time thing. Because I miss you, Jamie. I miss being with you. And Roy, he…” She looks at Roy.
“Fuck it,” Roy grumbles before sitting in the seat Keeley was practically out of. Pulls her on his lap before gripping the back of Jamie’s neck and pulling him into his side before slotting their lips together. Jamie is almost too stunned to react.
“Jesus, Roy, warn a girl first,” Keeley says. “And let the man agree to it before you inhale his face. He may not slap you with an assault charge, but-” She’s cut off when Jamie pulls her into a hug.
“I missed you,” Jamie admits.
“So, is that a yes?” Keeley asks, her tone filled with hope and only a little muffled by his shoulder.
“Of fucking course, that’s a yes,” Jamie laughs. “I might be a bit daft, but I’m not a complete numpty.”
“You’re not daft,” Keeley says. She leans back enough to put a hand on his face. “You’re brilliant.”
“You might not be a fucking rocket scientist, but she’s not wrong. Selling yourself short, Tartt. On the pitch, you’re a fucking genius. Off the pitch, you know the most insane shit I couldn’t even pretend to know.”
Jamie ducks his head to hide the blush dusting his cheeks.
"So adorable," Keeley coos.
"That is the nicest thing you have ever said to me," Jamie murmurs, glancing at Roy.
"Don't get used to it," Roy grumbles.
"Or do," Keeley kisses Jamie's still pink cheek. "He's lying. He knows you thrive on praise."
Roy grunts. "No one would believe you if you tell anyone."
Jamie actually laughs at that. And Roy would die before he admits it out loud, but he loves that sound.
"This is really happening, innit?” Jamie asks. “I didn’t smash my face during the match and am in so fucked up coma dream, or like some head trauma hallucination, right?”
“Well, then we’d be figments of your imagination, so how would we know?” Roy points out.
Keeley elbows Roy in the ribs, earning her a grunt. “You aren’t hallucinating or dreaming.”
Roy pinches Jamie’s side. Jamie yelps and pulls away. “Real enough?” Roy smirks.
“Not nice,” Keeley glares at Roy. She takes the opportunity to slip her hand under Jamie’s pullover and shirt to gently run her hand along the spot Roy had pinched. Jamie’s breath hitches, and he melts into her touch. She grins, “There’s my good boy.” Jamie groans.
“That really does the trick, doesn’t it?” Roy laughs. Jamie glares at him, but Roy just laughs harder. He’d seen Jamie’s glare make people flinch. But this one had no heat to it. It was a bluff. Clearly, he was enjoying himself too much to really be pissed. When the glare fails, Jamie pouts a bit. And Roy bites back a sigh.
“Fuck off with that pout,” Roy growls. He reaches over and pulls Jamie back to where he was before he pulled away. “This is a good thing, remember?” He reminds him as he tugs on the back of Jamie’s pullover until Keeley helps take it off of him. His shirt is quick to follow. Jamie nods. Keeley kisses him as her hands roam his chest and abs. She swallows his moan.
“Didn’t hear you, Tartt?” Roy teases as his own hands reach out and touch. Skin he’d been dying to touch for longer than he would ever admit to every time he saw Jamie in the locker room.
“Very,” Jamie breathlessly admits.
“Good,” Roy nods. “Because this is just the start of what we have planned for you.”
“Fuck yeah,” Jamie says. “Let’s go.” Keeley laughs as Roy pulls him in for a kiss.
“Fucking hot,” Keeley says as she watches them. “We gonna move this upstairs or what?”
Roy pulls back and gets a good look at both Jamie and Keeley. “Inna minute,” he says, and he grips the back of his own shirt. Keeley shifts over into Jamie’s lap so Roy can get his shirt off. Jamie happily accepts her and frees her from her own shirt.
“Fuck, I missed you,” Jamie says before moving his lips to the skin below her ear and along her jaw. He wasn’t exactly a selfish lover in the past, and he wasn’t a religious man, but he’d thank any deity listening for the chance to have her back in his life like this. Roy being there was just icing on the cake.
“Fucking gorgeous,” Roy admits.
"She really is," Jamie murmurs against her neck.
"I meant both of you, you fucking prick," Roy reaches up and cards his fingers through Jamie's hair. "Those pretty fucking lips of yours."
"Thought I was an ugly, ugly boy, with bad hair?" Jamie smirks.
"Fuck you," Roy growls as he pretty much attacks Jamie's lips with his own.
"That's why I said we should go upstairs," Keeley says from where she is sandwiched between the two very shirtless fucking fit men. "Although I'm not complainin'." She runs her nails along Roy's abs making him moan into Jamie's mouth. Jamie took advantage of it and deepened the kiss. But Keeley wasn't done being cheeky. She grins as she grinds down on Jamie's already tented clothed lap. A shock of pleasure runs down the striker's spine and he moans loudly. His arm snakes around her torso to hold her tighter. The other goes up to the back of Roy's neck. Fingers gripping tight like if he lets go it will all just vanish. Roy growls.
"Oh, that was a fun one," Keeley giggles.
"Upstairs." Roy growls. "Now."
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