#do you think he’s got good insurance?
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i’d like to take a look at will graham’s hospital bill
#𓆩 sambatz.txt 🕸🦇𓆪#bro’s in the hospital every week#do you think he’s got good insurance?#will graham#hannibal lecter#nbc hannibal
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I am really tired of a situation rn.
#fe three houses#felix hugo fraldarius#me using felix on my angy days because he is my angersona? you bet!#anyway if you want to try to get someones money or something bc you hurt your own car banging into mine#can you try to be a bit more timely with it buddy come on you hit me on feb29 !#why am i getting your insurance company calling me today !#also i would like to point out i didnt do it and neither of us were hurt and i filed a claim with my own insurance comp#and also filed a police report bc he didnt even suggest calling the cops to the scene#so like yeah hey man maybe you and your insurance company can move a lil faster or smth#literally everything that happened the day of is - according to my dad - an intimidation tactic#i look like im 15 and he probably thinks he can take advantage of a new driver but ya know! tough luck!#im just really tired and stressed over multiple things not negative so getting this on top of it was like#bro .................... anyway my phone didnt pick up for some reason so i called back and then nothing got resolved#cause the person who actually called me wasnt around to connect the line to from the guy who answered#idk man just its a lot despite my v minimal energy#got a job interview on monday tho ! and then also next week is an eye exam#and you might be thinking isnt that a good thing to get your eyes checked? you are correct but i am horrified#there are two body parts that give me absolute anxiety and eyes are one of them#and i know my eye sight is declining and im just v anxious#its fine im going to be fine i just have to be anxious about it
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if my parents keep talking to me im going to (remembers that suicide jokes are bad for mental health) go outside and dig a hole to narnia
#borbtalks#'borb u got a letter from vsp. why are you paying for vsp. i dont think u need it bc of xyz. oh you're getting mail from y insurance?#they're a good company. im also covered under them. are they cheaper than ur previous one? they must be. did u know medicare has a page#online where u can compare all the plans? well did you? ik you've been on medicare longer than me but idk if you knew :/#sooo do u have a valid drivers license? oh when did u get it renewed? when does it expire? we were looking at car insurance earlier...#oh btw when are they gonna reevaluate u for disability? do u know? when did they last reevaluate u? when do they reevaluate others?#ANYWAY. what if i brought over x's dog. the dog that stresses ur cats out so much that they puke everywhere and spend all day hiding :)#wdym it'll stress [cat] out. what if he. didn't get stressed? :)'#like SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP#cant even walk into the bathroom without her trying to talk to me. can't make dinner w/o her trying to talk to me#and of course im the bad guy in telling her not to stress the cat out#just by saying 'vet says he's not supposed to get stressed out. he's at a higher risk for blockage if he does#which will KILL him.'#same woman who sat next to me while i was the phone w/ the phone company. petting the cat and whispering 'oh borb abuses u doesn't he?#maybe ill just steal you away one day. keep u away from borb. oh yes borb treats u oh so horribly.'#and my dad. sitting on the other side of me. said absolutely nothing.#i get it. im the family's designated fuck up!! the designated brat !!!! and no one gives a shit if my feelings get hurt !!!!!!!#i swear. my mother could smack me and everyone would rush to her side and comfort her stinging hand
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haha Oops
#trigun#trigun 98#vash the stampede#meryl stryfe#millie thompson#listen. listen. trigun 98 is SO GOOD because. because it goes like this:#imagine. You are Meryl Stryfe. You work for an insurance company. You are sent by your insurance company - along with your partner Millie -#to hunt down this guy who has a fucking enormous bounty just because he Fucks Shit Up in every town he visits. The insurance company wants#him under 24-hr surveillance in order to stop him from Fucking Shit Up. You have to find him and then follow him around forever. Also he is#provably Evil and Fucked Up and. you know. he Fucks Shit Up. But you gotta do it. So. You spend FOUR MONTHS looking for this guy. You#follow rumors. You CANNOT FIND HIM. But what you CAN find is this PATHETIC LOSER FUCKING GUY - WITHOUT FAIL - EVERY TOWN you follow the#rumors to. There he is. People keep mistaking him for the guy you're looking for. But he Cannot be the guy! He can't!! Hes pathetic. he's a#wet beast of a man. he's an absolute dumbass. he's a Literal Pacifist. THERE JS NO WAY THAT HE IS THE GUY.#For literally a month at least. you KEEP RUNNING INTO HIM. And every time youre like. 'oh GOD no NOT YOU AGAIN!' and what makes it worse is#Millie goes 'omg hiii mister Vash!! We were looking for you!' and you have to REMIND HER that THIS IS NOT THE GUY!!!#YOU GOT THE WRONG GUY MILLIE!!! WRONG GUY!!! and the Fucking Guy just LAUGHS like he thinks your plight is FUNNY and you despise him.#anyways thjs goes on for like. the first five episodes. and its the FUNNIEST SHIT#ALSO HE KNOWS MERYL AND MILLIE ARE LOOKING FOR HIM. HE DOESNT BRING IT UP. HE SAYS NOTHING. NOT EVEN TO LIE AND DENY THAT HE'S THE GUY#anyway rant over#my art#screencap redraw#id in alt
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god i have been..... so out of it. move happened, thankfully where i ended up was not the worst case scenario i was afraid of but it's still rough. stress, food insecurity, trying to process new unfamiliar chaotic environment without being able to see much, having basically zero time in the day where at there's not at least one person in the central room where the kitchen is when usually at worst in my old place i'd have a few sanity hours at night while my stepdad was asleep, having very little room to actually stretch my legs and therefore exercise + do my main stim, having a godawful bed jesus fucking christ i hate memory foam so much, and walking on eggshells because the sister i've been staying with has gone from 'oh yeah i've got your back and we're besties, everything's fine :)' to kicking me out with 12 hours' notice the last time i had to move in with her, and Worsening Health Issues have just. left me totally brainfogged and out of social spoons, except for poking at solo rpgs and occasionally replying to one or two people/firing off twitter threads off the cuff during Moments of Clarity since it's easier than finishing a tumblr post. should try to adapt some of those at some point.
i know i keep saying that i miss posting and interacting regularly on this blog, but i do miss y'all and i miss writing up essays on here. and i hope people are doing well, or are headed for better days if you aren't.
#whosebaby talks#food insecurity mention cw#housing insecurity mention cw#abuse cw#medical issues cw#personal stuff#when i got here within about a week my sister who's a nurse was like#haha i think maybe we should uh. check you into the local hospital inpatient for a week. and do that soon. haha. um 😃#me: hm. well that's not good.#haven't managed to arrange it yet due to logistical issues but apparently it'll get me on a fast track to like. getting on disability#and getting a case worker + health insurance; and getting seen by a bunch of specialists in quick succession; and so on#and the hospital comes highly recommended from my sister; so it'll be good for me if i can just like. make it there.#getting back into ffi/x lately has been a security blanket at least so there's that#got a bunch of viv/i stickers and charms for moral support; and a little figure of he that tama gave me#baby boy son boy. a balm for the soul#anyway! anyway. wish me luck
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And maybe you'll be like "but if you don't trust businesses, how can you trust welfare?"
I fucking don't. My mom trying to get on food stamps fucked me up because a lady I never met without my permission got my SSN from my mom and started editing my files. My heart still races to this very second whenever I think about it, it kinda messed me up bad and I'll never ever ever see any kind of recourse
And I'm terrified that I'm gonna lose my medicaid just cause I inherited some money from my grandpa
And I've never even applied for disability cause it kinda doesn't matter finding out if I'd qualify or not cause of my depression, when the rules are so restrictive I don't know if I've even be allowed to keep my house
I do not fucking trust these things on a personal level. I feel like out of a lot of people I have the most to fear from them cause I'm on the edge of having things work, and that gets you punished
...but I need medicaid in order to have insurance (and when you strip out the finance side of medicaid, I love medicaid... they're honestly incredible insurance... I just... I just... dental is like 90% of why medicaid is so important to me, ever since I found out this state pays for it I've actually been able to do cleanings which is important to me cause I can't always get myself to brush)
And I think things like disability and food stamps are pretty damn important on a personal level, and honestly are also good for the economy cause they get people spending... it's practically a free cash infusion into the economy, cause these are people who need to buy stuff
There's just so much important stuff welfare does that it's worth dealing with government
No, what I want is more accountability so if someone gets my SSN from a 3rd party like my mom they're held to HIPPA styles standards where that's not ok to access my files without my permission (She changed my fucking address and tried to get medicaid to investigate me for fraud! Never even met me)
Like have some accountability there and in every situation
Secondly I want less punitive focused rules. I'd frankly prefer bezos get on disability than smack down some poor sod cause they got $2000 in the bank or cause their friend lets them live with them for free
If there's gonna be a cut off on these programs, it needs to be a solid step above the poverty line, cause... by definition I assume poverty line denotes kinda the minimum expected income people can reasonably live off of, and if you take away benefits people are gonna lose a chunk of money to covering that stuff themself, so you need a buffer before you kick people off
I don't fucking trust the government for a second, I've actively been fucked by them and on a personal level I avoid everything but medicaid and only that cause everything but the money is pleasant to deal with and I kinda need it (honestly if I was rich I'm not even kidding that I'd rather give medicaid like $400 a month than some insurance company, I sincerely like them as insurance)
But I'd trust them a lot more if they were less punitive, less out to hunt me down and gut me cause someone handed me a fiver or cause I started to get on my feet, and if government employees had concrete rules they had to follow that were actually transparent and enforced
Like 90% of my problems with welfare go away if they're held accountable and there's less "catch the welfare cheats" mentality going around
I don't trust the government in the slightest, but sadly there some jobs it kinda has to do, so I'd just rather force it to be an open book where the public can keep an eye on it and if they step out of line there's consequences (sort of like I don't trust most mega corps but happen to sometimes need stuff from them... did you know literally every cell service provider has been illegally selling shit like your location data to random people like bounty hunters, and the FCC just slapped them with a fine that's 0.02% of their yearly incomes and debated even doing that? I even can offer a source on that)
...I don't trust much of any authority cause they constantly fail me and kinda screw me. Don't trust doctors either, but I still gotta go to them, you know? ...they're just... they're real bad at listening... so many systems need systemic change
(You know who I really don't trust is the cops. I could point to so many examples. My uncle doesn't trust cops either, and he's an ex Fire and SWAT paramedic, he worked with them and we still got into a long conversation where he basically tore into them far better than I can)
(I don't trust authority that's not accountable)
#anyway; if I'm a lousy cheat or whatever least they can do is give me a gun so I can solve that problem#shit makes me wish I was canadian so I could take advantage of their sick implementation of assisted suicide#what should be a system that gives people a choice about the quality of their life; and I don't think should be relegated to terminal illne#...there was... think he was dutch; had been burned by his girlfriend all over his body; was in constant pain#and he ended up using assisted suicide in the end cause he was just in constant agony... think that's his choice to make#but of course the canadian system concretely pushes people; mostly the poor and disabled; to kill themselves#not theoretically; as in literally says word for word to them 'you should really kill yourself; just sign here'#it's sick; it truly is#but for any americans that want to dunk on it; I'm telling you we're no better#we have the exact same miserable desperation and people (again; mostly poor and disabled) into despair#only difference is we don't offer assisted suicide#the underlying issues in the US and canada are so damn similar; so much of what's happening ends up being the same#you can't act smug just cause you only make people want to die instead of also offering to help#that's like saying that you're the good guy cause while you did everything you could to drive someone to the brink#get them fired; slash their tires; just cartoon level villain stuff to personally harass this person... at least you won't hand them rope#we have such similar systemic issues to canada; and I am explicitly telling you that like the people in canada that have said#'I can't take it anymore; disability doesn't cover my expenses and I can't get any help... I'm at my wits end so I'm gonna go die'#I'm telling you that I feel that same way; just without any eugenics agency I can call up#I'm really working to get things stable; but it feels like I'm teetering on the edge of falling into permanent failure#and... and I'll actually tell you the amount even though I don't like to mention money... makes me feel guilty#my gramps left me $27k; which sounds like a lot; but I got 20 windows that need redoing (house has a lot of windows)#...if they ended up being 1k each; that's most of the money gone; if they end up being more...#and I got a whole lotta other stuff I've been putting off like plumbing around here; need to replace that faucet#it's an amount of money that helps; but it's an amount of money that isn't gonna last#...that's like a year of bills; and my mom already needs me to pay like $400 to the propane bill since she got behind#I want to use it to... to try and really get my feet on the ground; but it might loose me my insurance... it makes me want to die#and not to be a selfish bastard; but if I could I'd like to try and take and invest a bit to maybe build some passive income#given that... that a job never seems to work out for me cause I fucking suck and cause like... my insomnia has me up at 5:30 am right now#mm tag so i can find things later
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emotional over how Android 17 was built to kill and now his job is protecting life. he doesn’t want to kill the poachers even though they directly threaten the animals that are so important to him
he has a wife and kids now and has an actual life, something that Dr Gero never envisioned for him or his sister. they were created as tools meant to kill Goku but they’re his friend now. they live for themselves and value the lives that they were originally meant to destroy
#android 17 you are so special to me#the ‘even monster deserve a chance at life’ line he says to Goku is SO!! good because it feels very applicable to him and 18#they’re weapons built by the army to kill people and iirc they’re called monster a couple times throughout the Android/Cell sagas#but!! they’re also just people!! they were teenagers when they were experimented on and turned into androids they didn’t choose this#Krillin sees their humanity and asks Shenron to take their bombs out because he wants to give them the chance to live normal lives#and they do!! they grow and learn to appreciate the world around them and they have families ouugh#monsterous animals don’t choose to be born like that instead of cute. the androids didn’t choose to become androids#but they are and they deserve to live just as anything else does#I love overanlayzing dragon ball. this was probably not the intent but idc#ALSO I just think it’s interesting that the poachers leader claimed to have a bomb inside of him as an ‘insurance policy’#which directly mirrors the Androids who had bombs implanted in their hearts as insurance for Dr Gero in case they ever got too difficult to#control. does it mean anything? probably not. am I shaking it around in my head? yes#the androids are soo fascinating to me. did toriyama know he created the best characters ever when he made them#db watch
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Dad: “You’ve never consistently walked every day how do you know it wouldn’t help?” (my chronic fatigue and perceived laziness for only doing as much as I need to and no more)
Me: “I literally walked (up the steep ass hill leading to our neighborhood) every day with 30 lbs of textbooks on my back for 7 years.”
Dad: “And you had more energy and were 100lbs lighter back then! See it works!”
like literally 1. no, I definitely did not. there’s (many) reasons I didn’t do homework and was failing every class bc of it, and a lack of energy was a big one. 2. lmao I gained like 30 lbs since I got out of high school if he really thinks it was 100 he’s deluding himself. 3. i only did all of that because i literally had no other choice. what was I going to do as someone who has a massive fear of punishment (in large part because of him), not go to school? skip class and get treated even worse? this is the man that cut off my access to running water for like 12 hours as punishment once. i can’t believe i ever thought that shit was normal
#venting about the massive fight i just had with him. get this. because i only cut enough bread for myself when he’s not even—#—eating any tonight. as if me not cutting the entire loaf into slices is some huge moral failing#‘you do the bare minimum and only ever think of yourself’ yeah ok i fixed a nice lunch for both of us today and youre gonna say that—#—not even 5 hours later huh. fuck you.#can’t tell if i wanna die or want him to die or both but I sure as hell am sick of this bullshit#doesnt help that ive been unmedicated for months now bc we lost our medi-cal. mom got a job with enough pay that it took our eligibility#which. good for her! she got insurance at that job too! proud of her.#but theyve been separated since dec 2020 and it completely screwed us bc they arent legally divorces#ill be getting on my own medi-cal soon enough (if i can muster the energy for it) cuz imd be kicked off theirs at the end of the year anyway#since i just turned 26#but yeah cant afford all those medications with only $12 in my bank. had to ask mom to pay for an inhaler cuz mine was out and i need that—#—for emergencies. cant be without an inhaler when i have an asthma attack#gonna stop now cuz im getting turbo depressed
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Hodgins would have made you t gel already... Homemade from scratch totally 100% safe
I love and trust Hodgins but I don't think any of his three doctorates quite cover t gel
#He WOULD pay for it though. No worry no hassle. Do you think he got free like wicked good insurance? Prob--#HODGINS VOICE: You could just marry me for my insurance and divorce I wouldn't mind#tricks answers
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theyre called "Dodge" bc when you decide not to buy one youve dodged a fucking bullet
#still think of my stupid ex who dropped 40k on a truck while he was flat broke just to stroke his ego#and the truck he picked was a fucking dodge. like really. just insult to injury at that point#cracked the windshield like 2 weeks after he got it and couldnt even afford the deductible from insurance to get it fixed#like bro do you think thats maybe a sign youre a raging idiot. he was permanently broke im not like making fun of being on hard times#im kind of drunk i tried some new vodka thing its good ill have to get more. i love tags i can say anything and nobody has to see it rly#should sleep now <33#and fuck that guy im so much happier without him. last month made 1 yr since i cut him out of mylife and i dont miss him or his stupid truc#or his piss poor money management skills while having (at the time) paid-for cars and no rent and journeyman wages $20-25/h#always borrowign money and never paid it back. lucky i only stopped speaking to him and didnt take it out of his truck nova scotia style#its what he would have done. cunt. bedtime for real now maybe ill remember to delete all this in the morning ily all
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so to do my testing i need a state id but to get my state id i need a social security card bc i lost mine so im waiting up to 15-20 days for social security to send me a verification number in the mail so that i can apply for a new social security card and then ill have to wait for that to get to me and then i can go get my ky id and hopefully not get in trouble for taking so long to get my id changed and THEN i can schedule my ged classes. and by then ill probably have finished my math and science ged readys which is good and ummm i think thats all. itll prolly be a permit rather than a state id so i can work on learning to drive since we have a nice Not horrible car . and then ill know how to drive which will be helpful to me even if it takes me a while to actually own a car... but itd be helpful to Be able to drive yk. even if i am quite late... and once i get all of that done then thats like finally finished and then i can get a job again and start saving up money for when i am ready to move out...
#and once i am Making money again ill feel better going to the dr for all of my stuff bc my mom says itd be covered by insurance but im#rly rly paranoid abt there being copays or something yk . so id like to Have money jic since i currently have. 3 dollars at all#but yes. and im rly lucky im able to live with my family bc like. they wont Make me pay rent they might ask for help which ill gladly do bc#1. yk and 2. i have been living here free of charge for almost a year 3. even all that aside i want the kids to be able to keep living here#and also be able to eat so idm helping with groceries and the mortgage or whathave you... and itll all be cheaper than paying rent at my#own place anyways so i can build up a good net AND ill have money to start donating again bc i hate not being able to donate it makes me#feel so useless. that was the best part of living in wa was that i Had money to be spending and donating was one of the like. bc i have a#lot of hangups abt money so pretty much spending any money made me feel sick and i had to punish myself for it BUT donating bypassed that.#not that the benefit of donating is that i can spend money without feeling bad but it is something i Want to do because i want to be able t#help however i can . obviously. i am rambling now but basically yes im excited to have a job again#idt ill have money to get people gifts this year for xmas Which sucks but hoooooooopefully i will have a job by february.......... dependin#wewill see how it all works out. im hoping february bc thats the start of the 1st wave of bdays. well . technically january is but thats My#bday so it doesnt count.... bc tag feb father mar weeman may. and then lamp sep and mother oct and i couldnt get either of them gifts and#Yeah i feel evil#BUT!!!! next year i will be able to afford everything all of it ill have money and a job and i can get ppl gifts i love buying ppl gifts#even tho im bad at it i fear. bc i dont have much experience last year was the first year i got to buy xmas gifts for everybody... and bday#for some even :] but ya. ive loved buying gifts since 8th grade which was the first time i was able to buy gifts for my friends bc my dad#gave me his credit card for the dc trip. bc we were on kiiiiind of difficult terms in 2018 LOLLL. so he was doing pretty much anything to#get me to talk to him again the perks of having to go to court against your parent. and also girl that restraining order was meaningless bu#whatever i cant think abt it or ill get kinda mad so were moving on Oh im cramping that sucks okayyyyy. anyways. YES so thats your connor u#date i think these tags are gonna get cutoff in a major way. wait nvm i only had like 22... ok well ending it here goodbye my diary
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yknow i was doing research on being legally dead for a different oc but then i remembered psike like. Oh. Yeah ne's legally fucking dead ain't ne. If not for nis not-yet-resurrexted body, nis 30+ YEAR DISAPPEARANCE is something. And from?? At least one source i saw that once some time has passed after a declaration of death, you can't declare yourself alive anymore and in other cases you CAN try to but it's an arduous process. So like if psike ever wanted to be legally recognized as alive again it's gonna be such a pain in the ass. Not only that but THE ONLY FUCKER WHO CAN ATTEST FOR NIS ORIGINAL IDENTITY IS
KALE FUCKING SCHMIDT
#TabbyKat Rambles#HE'S NOT EVEN ALLOWED IN COURT THERE'S **NOTHING** THEY HAVE ON HIM.#FINGERPRINTS ARE FUCKED. IT REFUSES TO SHOW ITS FACE. ETC. HIS ASS IS NOT GOING TO COURT#Don't get me started on the dayshift characters. Oh my god#Dave is most definitely legally dead. I know that orphanage wouldn't keep track.#I feel like she got a drivers license or an id. I forgot which. Don't Worry About It.#Naomi was at least LEGALLY adopted so that has to count for smth 4 peter. Then again Caroline the alive human was there#Dee. Looks at you. Cmon man.#Jack. Jack#Naomi is pulling MAD shenanigans disguising them all up so they can go out in public#(Naomi voice) I'm gods favorite he has to do this for me or else I'll suplex him....#Oh right#Legal death declaration means losing all your property + insurance being given to your remaining family#I think impacts ur drivers license too??#Anyways good thing psike only owned a car! Sorry about your drivers license.
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So this is my thing now, I’m afraid to go to sleep. This is kinda bullshit, brain.
#I feel like I’m going to die when I fall asleep#see… I’m afraid you think I just mean I’m scared of death#no no no. no. I feel like I’m suffocating. I have to force myself to breathe. my body tingles (in a bad way). I get really overheated.#I get dizzy and feel like I’m going to pass out from lack of air. I feel sick.#I haven’t slept much lately.#I’m miserable alllll the time. I can maybe force sleep with super exhaustion but I’m drained no matter what#this isn’t the first time it’s happened but this is the longest it’s gone on#from that my anxiety is now blanketing everything bc I’m so tired and scared about not getting to sleep#sickening anxiety. I feel like puking or passing out. and I got hit with some heavy (but thankfully short) virtigo yesterday#terrible terrible terrible#and seriously. anxiety. so bad. I’m constantly trying to get high right now to fight it but it’s rough#getting high is starting to make me feel sick too. and my tolerance is building. it’s like… it’s all bad. all options.#I hate this.#AND it’s the weekend and my new primary can’t see me until Wednesday and then I’ve got to beg for… I dunno… the good stuff#god. I told myself I’d go see my doctor about this a couple of weeks ago when this last hit and I didn’t 😓#ideal scenario: all doctors fall in love with me and medically induce a short coma for me to catch up on sleep and then they give me drugs#this new doctor doesn’t know me! I haven’t laid enough groundwork! how am I supposed to beg for klonopin if we have no banter!?#that wasn’t a joke. I mean it was but it’s also serious. I need some GOOD anti-anxieties and he doesn’t know me enough to know I NEEDS IT😬#also my tinnitus is just… no sleep + stress means it gets stronger and it’s… a fucking wet willy shoved through my ear into my skull#and if I hit a bad patch of virtigo… I will… redacted.#I won’t! I will go running crying and screaming in the street before I off myself.#HEY! my insurance says I can get 30 days in-patient and I always keep that thought in my bad pocket.#*back pocket. I’m not about to go back and start redoing tags because of a few misspellings#this is so rambly#my brain is fried! I’m tired! my appetite is fucked! I don’t want to do ANYTHING!#I mean… I never want to do anything. I love being lazy. I should say that right now I CAN’T do anything. but I can. but it’s… a lot. fuck 😔#this must sound so whiny. I’m sorry. I’m sure I’ll be making more posts like this until this goes away#you can ignore this#text
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#idk i kind of find it fucked up that my dad thinks it was a bad idea to tell me about his life insurance plan#he told my mom “ you think it was a good idea telling him ? you know people kill people for it”#almost if not is insinuating that i would do something like that#idk to me it speaks volumes on how he views me as a person to think i would even think of such a thing#it bothers me to think he would think id do that i definitely dont get along with the dude but i wouldn't do that 😂#like you really think that low of me 😂 bruh that shit is sad to me#i absolutely hated him when i was growing up; literally had everyone walking on eggshells#you literally quite literally couldn't say anything to him or he would get aggressively mad#literally so mad that his screams alone would make my ears ring and hed throw stuff around in his little shed#i would be so scared as a kid helping him with a car maintenance or anything around the house cause any inconvenience#would have the man screaming at me when I've done nothing but try and help and cuss me out for the thing he fucked up something#for years i couldn't hang out with my classmates outside of school near my house without him cussing at me and screaming at me to go home#if he saw me with them at the abandoned next door neighbors house he would literally scream at me and cuss at me to get in the fucking house#and would grab my arm and push me inside; i was just in middle school at the time and ive already been through so much mental abusive#i would get blaimed for anything he did wrong when i would try to help him fix something around the house and it wasnt my fault#screaming and cussing at me calling me fucking stupid in Spanish i hated him so much his excuses are work had him so stressed out#like if that excuses him for taking his stress out on my sister and i; its absolute bullshit the man he is now is just a toned down version#thats why when he did it again not long ago it triggered me so much it brought back so many horrible memories i didnt want to remember#he didnt even apologize to me he just told my mom he was embarrassed and didnt know what got over him like that's an excuse to scream#and cuss at everyone who had nothing to do with him fucking up the wall he had no reason of cutting and cutting a pipe in the process#he was cussing at me saying i dont want to be critique 🤣 like dawg all i was only giving him options to fix the problem#he took that as critiquing and he fucking exploded cussing and screaming in Spanish i was sure we were about to fight again#it wouldn't be the first time ive fought him before when i was a teenager cause he would scream at my mom and grandma#and i would stand up for them and just for that he would throw hands with a 13 year old me a 15 year old me a 16 17 amd 18 year old me#he was a horrible person and i hate it when people tell me he was a good person there that he was a good father cause he provided for my mom#like if thay excuses the abuse he put my sister and i through like fuck that dude he had not right hitting my sister in the face#and mentally abusing us its absolute bullshit and i still have not gotten over my childhood#literally the worst time of my life was my whole childhood for every good time i had there were 10 times more negative shit that happened#so i find it funny that he'd think i would kill him 🤣 for his insurance money i dont want his stupid money#he really thinks that low of me and it's quite sad honestly
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"There are old poops who will say that you do not become a grown-up until you have somehow survived, as they have, some famous calamity -- the Great Depression, the Second World War, Vietnam, whatever. Storytellers are responsible for this destructive, not to say suicidal, myth. Again and again in stories, after some terrible mess, the character is able to say at last, 'Today I am a woman. Today I am a man. The end.' When I got home from the Second World War, my Uncle Dan clapped me on the back, and he said, 'You're a man now.' So I killed him. Not really, but I certainly felt like doing it. Dan, that was my bad uncle, who said a male can't be a man unless he'd gone to war. But I had a good uncle, my late Uncle Alex. He was my father's kid brother, a childless graduate of Harvard who was an honest life-insurance salesman in Indianapolis. He was well-read and wise. And his principal complaint about other human beings was that they so seldom noticed it when they were happy. So when we were drinking lemonade under an apple tree in the summer, say, and talking lazily about this and that, almost buzzing like honeybees, Uncle Alex would suddenly interrupt the agreeable blather to exclaim, 'If this isn't nice, I don't know what is.' So I do the same now, and so do my kids and grandkids. And I urge you to please notice when you are happy, and exclaim or murmur or think at some point, 'If this isn't nice, I don't know what is.'"
— Kurt Vonnegut, A Man Without a Country (2005)
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if you're doing mouthwashing can i have daisuke x reader hcs plz... just pretend the tulpar never crashed i want him to be happy hjdkjkdsjg
OMG ANON…you get me. Daisuke has me in a CHOKEHOLD. Ok so here are how the headcanons are gonna go. Pre dating/confession. Dating and NSFW. I had another anon ask me to do NSFW head canons with daisuke. So why not kill two birds with one stone. The regular head canon r gonna be Gn. But the NSFW are gonna have some AFAB stuff. Still can kinda be read as Gn.
Crushing - Confession
- I believe Daisuke crushing on you would be a very, you fell first, but he fell harder kinda thing.
- I think that because Daisuke can be well.. a bit dense (still love him though). That he’s not really gonna pick up on any hints or flirting. So you kinda of have to wait till he realizes he likes you.
- When he does realize he likes you is probably when you were sticking up for him against Swansea(I love you Swansea but you still were mean to Daisuke🙁).
- It’s gonna be easy to tell when he likes you. This man is gonna be so obvious😭���
- We all know he’s eager to please right? He’s doing this with you 2 times more. Always asking if you needed anything, he’d be right on it.
-Little things to. I’m talking some laying his shirt over a puddle for you to step on. I feel like he tries to woe you with these gestures.(and it works)
- Daisuke loves listening to your voice. No matter how your voice sounds. He’ll go out of his ways to find you to ramble on about something. He thinks you look and sound cute rambling. o(^w^)o
- Also I think he just likes looking at you. There have been MANY times where Swansea has smacked Daisuke in the back of the head, cause he got sidetrack staring at you with this very lovesick grin. Staring like you personally hung the stars for him.
- Daisuke would be a bit too nervous to think of confessing first. So Swansea would definitely be pushing him to confess. He’s tired of seeing you two ogling at each other and doing nothing about it😒.
- Our sly little man some how convinced Curly to make a cake for him to give you. (I swear on my life curly is a die hard romantic but I’m saving that for when I do headcanons on him later)
- I feel like Daisuke would sneak in your room. Waiting for you to enter. When you do he lifts up the cake in his hands, “ Imadeyouthiscakewillyoudateme” He rambled out. Being scared you would say no.
- But when you say yes. I’m not kidding he shouted “WHOO HOO!!!”. It was very funny. Daisuke would quickly put the cake down and rush to hug you,
Dating
- I feel like the affection he likes to receive is words of affection and physical contact. And for what he usually gives. Acts of service and physical affection. Let me explain
-(Daisuke receiving) It’s a bit obvious that Daisuke probably hasn’t gotten a lot of praise in his life. So I believe that he absolutely melts when you give him these encouraging words. It can range from a lot. From a small, “good job” to a “I love you so much, no matter what.”. It makes him so happy like you don’t even understand.
-(Daisuke receiving) Idk it’s just a an itch in my brain telling me. I think he likes all kinds of physical affection. From holding his pinky, to wrapping you arms and legs around him cuddling. If it insures some sort of touching he’s down. I also think he like resting his head on either your thighs, or chest. Resting his eyes. PLEASE scratch his head or tangle your fingers through his hair. He loves it so much. Like it calms him down so much.
-(Daisuke giving) You can’t tell me this man isn’t at least a bit clingy. Not in a “if you talk to someone else I’ll kill them” type of way but a “ you make me feel safe and secure” kind of way. Does that make sense? Anyways, he loves flopping onto you when he sees you laying down. Like I’m talking full rag doll flop. I fully believe he brought a stuff animal on the ship. So he fully treats you like a stuff animal. Quick random switch. I don’t think he likes being the small spoon. Only because I feel like he needs to sleep holding something. I don’t think he would mind being big spoon. But overall he prefers you two facing each other.
-(Daisuke giving) We all know he has a knack for trying to be as helpful as he can. We can see that when he tried to fix the vent! To trying to crawl up it to save Anya… guys I can’t do this anymore. ANYWAYS. This man does not want you to lift a FINGER. He is so head over heels inlove with you. He’ll do anything for you. He’ll ask him to bring you a star and he’d ask which one. LIKE HE LOVES YOU SM AND JUST WANTS TO SEE YOU HAPPY.
- He loves kissing. Receiving and giving. From a simple peck, to kissing your face all over. He just loves it so much. He finds it so romantic. Listen hear me out. Non sexual neck kissing. He could be waking up before you(highly unlikely). Softly kissing your neck to wake you up. Just soft and sweet.
- Late night talks are a must with him. It could be about anything really. From what plot twist you guys thought would happen on the shitty soap opera you guys were watching. What ifs, what your guys future would look like, what you guys would be if you were animals. The topics you guys talk about are far and wide. But he enjoys the comfort of being by you.
- You can’t tell me this man isn’t a big back. Daisuke definitely brought a bunch of snacks with him. So he will happily share with you. He is a very giving person. But also expect to get your food stolen sometimes.. make sure you get extra food in your plate to give him the rest. He would appreciate it a lot!!!!!:3
- He also really loves spending anytime he can with you. Especially if it involves games. Let me tell you. YOU DO NOT WANNA PLAY DRESS TO IMPRESS WITH THIS MAN. He would cook you so hard in the game it’s not even funny. He’s literally in the top 10 players in dress to impress.
NSFW - DO NOT READ IF YOUR A MINOR OR UNCOMFORTABLE WITH NSFW (AFAB)
- Praise kink. YOU GUYS CANT TELL ME I’M WRONG. You guys could water board me. Scream at me that I’m wrong. Every time you praise him when y’all are getting freaky. Busting. Like it gets him going SO HARD (pun intended) Like omg… Especially if you praise his efforts/ how good he’s doing. Pray that you’ll be able to walk after.
- This man is LOUD…… grunting, whimpering, moaning, panting. Any noise you can think of hes made it. Like he doesn’t even think of suppressing his noises. He also doesn’t want you to either! He loves hearing you. He thinks the louder you are = the better he’s doing. So please don’t suppress your noises he’ll get so sad:(. But back to the topic. This man needs something to muffle him. Wether that be kissing you, or lightly nibbling your neck. When he starts to get to loud you need to find a way to shut him up.
-Speaking of loud Swansea has definitely caught you guys once’s. Y’all were a bit to loud and he was wonder what was going on and… Let’s just say he wasn’t able to look at you guys for a bit. But after he gave Daisuke a fist bump. Man to man🗣️🗣️🗣️
- Daisuke is willing to try almost everything. I full heartedly believe this man is a virgin. The furthest he’s ever gone is making out. So he’s eager to learn! He was a bit nervous your guys first time. But after a bit that nervousness dissolved into eagerness! I don’t think he’d be into hurting you badly. And I don’t think he likes pain that much either. But I think he would like his hair being pulled. Or maybe you lightly scratching his back.
- I think he would be open to having sex not just in your rooms. Either in random room barely used. Or a couple of times on the couch when everyone was in their sleeping quarters. Thankfully you guys weren’t caught!!! But Curly was wondering what that clear sticky substances was on the couch…
-(AFAB) Munch no question asked. LISTEN WHEN I SAW HE WANTED AN EXTRA PACK OF SWEETENER I IMMEDIATELY THOUGHT BIG BACK MUNCH BEHAVIOR. Also because this man loves to please. DO YALL SEE ME VISION. This man who’ll slurp it up like no tomorrow. His favorite made is your pleasure is his pleasure. But omg like he gets so into eating you out it’s not even funny… You have to pry his face away from your core. And he looks so hot. His hair a mess. His eyes dazed but still has that love in them. And your juice all over his face like…
- He doesn’t have a favorite position. He likes way too many. And when you asked him what position he liked the most, he only responded with, “how can I pick a favorite when there all so good, and what about the ones we haven’t tried yet!” Safe to say you guys went to go try some more positions 😜
- I know I’ve been doing really freaky headcanons but I think Daisuke loves soft sex and morning sexy to. Maybe the morning after a bad day HES still feeling bad. You both are still groggy but you have time before you have to get up. Hell sink himself into. Before thrusting as his arms are wrapped around your waist. His hot breath on your neck, as he trailed kisses all along it. Just because he can be a freak doesn’t mean he can’t be really soft either.
- Daisuke loves cock warming. Try. Try to prove me wrong. He loves cuddling. He loves being as close to you as possible. What’s better than combining the two! But after a bit he does get a bit impatient and starts to subtly thrust. He really is trying to not to be you feel to good!
Authors note: SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG. I STARTED THIS WHEN I GOT HOME AND FELL ASLEEP MID WAY THROUGH WRITING THIS. Again sorry for request being slow I’m trying my best😭🙏
#mouthwash smut#mouthwashing smut#mouthwash x reader#daisuke mouthwashing#mouthwashing#daisuke smut#mouthwashing x reader#mouthwashing game#mouthwash game#mouthwash#daisuke x reader
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