#do you know what you need to do if you are in Copenhagen and want to go to Sweden?
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greaseonmymouth · 5 months ago
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today I learned that the eurotunnel is not, as I had (quite rationally) believed, a tunnel with a road through it that one can drive through.
no. instead of a road, people wanting to cross in their cars, have to…board a specially built train with their car. the train then travels through the tunnel. this whole ordeal comes with tickets needing booked and arriving x amount of hours in advance (as you would for a flight) and I’m just…..why. why was it decided that this would be the most efficient way to travel through a tunnel. why aren’t people just. driving through the goddamn tunnel themselves, like every-fucking-elsewhere in the world???
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queers-gambit · 1 month ago
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History of Clocks
prompt: Carmy asks you out, Carmy thinks it's platonic. Carmy and Claire go on a date, Carmy forgets to cancel. how strong - or brittle - is your friendship?
pairing: Carmen 'Carmy' Berzatto x female!bestie!reader
fandom masterlist: FX's The Bear
collection masterlist: Nights Like This
word count: 10.8k+
note: strap in, this is a doozy. a masterpiece, but i digress.
warnings: humiliation / being stood up in public, i guess miscommunication trope, Carmy's a dumb fucking boy (and a lil bit of a dick), emotions are hard, angst, this Barbie copes through writing, girls being girls over fashion, love confessions, unrequited love, drawing boundaries, depiction of anxiety, nicknamed!reader has a dog, Cicero's niece reader 'cause why not! alcohol consumption (reader's a wine girlie)! and brief depiction of smoking! use of literary devices*, hurt no comfort!
*literary device warnings: a lot of repetition and too many idioms - some flow, others are kinda forced. please roll with it.
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If someone asked Carmen Berzatto who his best friend was, he'd have zero hesitation to list your name. If someone asked who understood him the best, he'd say you did. If someone asked who supports him most outside his family, he'd shout your name first, declare your love as unconditional. If someone asked who or what inspired him, he'd insist it was you. But if you asked Carmy who he took romantic interest in, he'd answer Claire.
If anyone asked you ANY of the aforementioned questions, each response would be the same: Carmen Anthony Berzatto.
The two of you had been friends well over a decade by now, enduring his tenancy in Copenhagen and his residency in New York; plus anywhere in between. Sure, of course, it was frustrating having him gone, you missed him in abundance - but your pride outweighed everything. To see him chase and achieve such dreams brought you unparalleled joy; so much so, it didn't matter your pain of missing him. In turn, Carmy genuinely contributed much of his success to you, claiming your friendship is the central pillar that kept him upright; your blind encouragement what propelled him forward; and how a single phone call, hearing your voice, was like audible Xanax that quelled anxiety and self-doubt.
You had a tailored way of speaking to him; a way that never pressured him, but tried to show a different perspective to soothe his overactive thoughts. He describes you as optimistic, which, in his mind, was refreshing because of his violent pessimism. So, he attributed you as someone who kept him in balance.
A partner in crime. Another pea in his pod. Each other's missing half. A best friend.
For a while, this was enough.
You knew Claire was back around, but didn't put much stock in it because Carmy never did. Foolishly, you thought it was because of you - that maybe he harbored some feelings for you as you did him, and that's why he was uninterested in Claire. Through his transition being back home, Carmy had relied on you heavily, especially in the wake of Mikey; sharing intimate moments of emotional turmoil, doubts, fears, hopes, worries, dreams. Something in you both shifted; thinking perhaps you had aged past petty, fleeting flings and could focus on farming meaningful, real, lasting, supportive relationships. You foolishly thought you and Carmy were seeing one another through rose tinted glasses at the same time; that his were finally on.
You had been in the back office, wrapping up necessary paperwork for The Bear's operation when Carmy suddenly appeared in the doorway. "Hey, Honey, you got a sec?" He asked, wiping his hands on a dish towel; broad shoulder supporting his weight on the doorframe.
"Sure, whatcha need, Bear?" You glanced away from your paperwork to smile at him.
"What're you doing Friday night?"
"Uh, probably laundry? Why?"
Carmy chuckled and asked, "Wanna go out with me to this new marketplace? They have this place that does a fusion menu I've been wanting to try."
"Oh, I don't know, babes, I'm kinda out of clean underwear," you joked, both snorting identically.
"C'mon, pretty girl, go out with me. I'll even pay."
Apparently, in Carmy's mind, the phrasing 'go out with me' was purely platonic whereas to your ears, it was being asked out on an actual date. A miscommunication - or misunderstanding - that would position you both towards pain and difficulties.
"Oh, then I guess I can make it work. Where and what time do you wanna meet, Bear?"
"There's my girl," he smiled so prettily.
Carmy set the time. Carmy set the location. Carmy sought you out. Carmy asked you to go out with him. So, you didn't think to specifically clarify this meant Carmy was seriously committing because it sounded like a secure plan.
You should have.
Apparently, after parting ways with you, Claire contacted Carmy later in the night and made arrangements for their own date - on the same night, at the same time as his date with you. Carmy was so over the moon about going out with Claire, though, that he completely "forgot" to cancel on you, let alone tell you. Which felt very deliberate, considering the pair of you were so close, you were in the room post his appendix surgery - and if you've ever been there when someone's coming out of anesthesia, you know it can get kinda... intimate. So the fact that he never "thought" to tell you about Claire was a malicious blow - even if he did it unknowingly by being hyperfocused on where he'd take his lifelong crush, what he'd wear, even practicing certain topics of interest that would help him keep conversations flowing. The determination to make this date with Claire prove himself worthy of being loved, of being a priority in someone's life, mirrored your own desire - but specifically with Carmy.
You're not even sure how long you've harbored these feelings. Was it since high school? Maybe after? Was it before he left Chicago? Or when he was in Copenhagen, calling you when he got off work to chat on his walk 'home'? Maybe it was after he came back stateside and gifted you a leather-bound parchment journal where each page had a different dried, pressed, preserved floral. He labeled each bloom, dated the pages, and detailed where he was when he found each flower in silky ink from a fountain pen. The script truly looked poetic on the 'aged' pages.
"Oh, my God, Carmy - oh, wow! Look at this!" You gasped when presented the gift, gingerly leafing through the journal. "This is so - who thinks of something like this, wow, oh, look! Carm, I-I-I don't have the words, babes, this is just so beautiful, I'm blown away right now."
He shrugged sheepishly, hands in his pockets, "I picked any flower that reminded me of you." You'd come to read later that each page had an inked explanation of why these flowers made him think of you.
You beamed, clutching the journal to your chest, "Thank you so much, Carmy, I-I love it. No, really, I do!" You insisted when you saw his expression morph, "It's honestly the most thoughtful gift I've ever gotten, thank you so much."
"It's nothing," he eased, but the tips of his ears and apples of his cheeks were glowing bright. "I just didn't want to bring you home some novelty bullshit, like a 'I heart Copenhagen' mug; you deserved something better, more personal. You're a huge part of why I even went... Even bigger reason why I came back."
It was arduous to keep a level, pessimistic attitude; to gaslight yourself into believing your best friend didn't have feelings for you, that he was just being nice. Soon, it felt like wherever you turned, you had reason to suspect his feelings had changed; so upon being asked out, you abandoned logic and allowed yourself to flood with optimistic euphoria.
On Friday, you showed up at the agreed upon location; excited to take your taste buds on a culinary world tour without ever leaving Chicago with a real worldly chef. You thought you looked nice; carefully selected fashionable clothes (that ensured didn't look like you tried 'too hard') with chunky heels; your hair styled, make-up so perfect it could've been the featured look of a YouTube tutorial. Not wanting to wait on the sidewalk for safety reasons, you stepped into the fusion restaurant. After checking in with the hostess and earning a compliment from her on your fit, you were lead to a two-person table draped in navy linen with a contemporary floating candle centerpiece.
"Are you expecting company this evening?" She asked kindly, handing you a menu.
"Yeah, I'm just a little early. We're - yeah, no, I guess it's a date? He, um, he should be here soon," you rushed, flushing when you mentally scolded yourself that she didn't care and you needed to stop oversharing.
"Oh, no wonder you look so stylish!" She gushed. "He's gonna love it, you look beautiful - but not as much as I love your purse. I've always wanted one like it, but maybe in burgundy." You told her the store you got yours at, explaining it was a discount-department store buy, but the designer was sold at other easily accessible stores. It was nice to have a friendly, normal conversation; just two girlies, exchanging fashion tips which helped you feel all the calmer. The hostess who's badge read Laura nodded with a smile, "Is it okay to leave his menu here, then? I can take it back with me, if you wanna share?"
"No, no, you can leave it - I didn't bring my reading glasses," you tried to joke, wincing at the awkwardness.
"No problem," she set it down. "Can I get you anything in the meantime, honey?"
You almost laughed, instead smiling, "Oh, uh, water would be great, thank you."
The dining hall was relatively moderately full; several tables empty, waitstaff in matching navy uniforms dotted around, the lighting low to create a warm (or romantic) ambiance. You nervously checked the gold bracelet-watch inherited from your grandmother, clocking the time as 6:24.
There was no need to stress yet, so you studied the menu and made mental notes of what sounded good, what dish paired with what. A person could only look over menu options so many times, however, so you answered a few emails and texts before mindlessly scrolling through social medias to kill awkward time.
Around 7:05, your chest felt warm with something that made your intuition catch flame.
You texted Carmy: hey are you running late? you haven't texted me you're on the way yet 🤨
While to some, saying 'you haven't texted me yet' might sound a little overbearing, crazy, or pushy - maybe even spoiled - you did so because you knew how scatter brained Carmy was. He had an incredibly unpredictable, stressful, and chaotic job, which meant he sometimes lost track of time and needed reminders of other responsibilities / obligations outside The Beef, soon-to-be The Bear. You two had a friendship built on trust, fully able (and encouraged) to be yourselves and send borderline crazy messages to each other. You said it in person, why not over text?
The sweating glass of water was refilled, invisible timer ticking inconspicuously in the background, bread basket missing several sticks, the dining room now about 75% full.
Glancing around, you felt nauseated when you noted several couples enjoying romantic dinners; others with easy smiles and jovial laughter, happy to partake in the good tidings of loved ones. All around you, there was a smorgasbord of buzzing conversation you couldn't decipher. You had nothing else to do but focus on random moments of clarity, deducing some patrons were meeting for business; others were on dates, one table was celebrating their friend's new promotion, another, a birthday.
Yet here you sat, alone in the middle of a popular, high-trafficked restaurant; silent, isolated, feeling as if you were some zoo exhibit. Your plaque would read: Behold! The Stood-Up Single Woman!
While irrational, you felt other patron's beady eyes glazing over you - as if everyone could just tell what was happening. Their eyes made you sweat, feeling perceptive and heated, heavy and hateful. They watched you in your exhibit as if to affirm their situations could never be so bad because at least they weren't like you: stood-up, outcast, and humiliated. Their pity reeked. Their muttered words of prediction filled the stuffy space.
The invisible timer ticked louder, faster.
Tapping your phone screen set on the table, the time now glared as 7:33. So, you sent another text: uh, hello? Carmen! i thought we agreed to meet at 6:30? what's wrong?
Your message delivered, but there was no response.
Anxiety filled your heart, mind, and soul; being pumped through your veins to absorb in your bones - which created a sort of ripple effect within your chest and abdomen. Hair stood on the back of your neck. Stomach torqued in fear. Lungs deflated. Esophagus twisted. Chest hollowed and sunk. Right leg bounced at Olympic speed. Fingers twitched nervously, picking at cuticle, teeth chewing the skin off raw lips; eyes drawn to the entrance just in case Carmy showed up... In case anyone showed up. Skin burned and sizzled under the long, pitiful stares of patrons and employees alike. Heat flushed your body with embarrassment as if under Broadway stage lights; making you feel clammy and uncomfortable.
At 7:36, you double texted: Carmy?
Why wouldn't he answer you? Why wasn't his location updating? You worried something happened, he always messaged you when running late - so why not this time? Was something wrong? Did something happen? Wouldn't Sugar or Richie or one of the nine fucking Faks have called you?
The invisible timer ticked louder, faster.
At 7:45, Laura returned to your table, asking, "Would you like to see our drinks menu again?"
"Oh, uh, no, thank you, it's not necessary. Could I do another glass of Moscato, please?"
"Of course. Could I interest you in the bottle, you think?"
"At this point, yes ma'am," you chuckled at yourself.
"Any appetizers? Or more bread?" Laura asked sweetly.
You ordered multiple somethings to keep appearances, feeling bad you had sat there without ordering for so long; but also figuring if you were here, might as well enjoy trying something new, right? As the pretty young thing with a slicked back bun walked away, you were left to stare at the other undisturbed menu across from you, the candle wax dribbling into the water it floated on. Snatching your phone in hand, you glared at your message thread with Carmy, sending another: what the FUCK, Carm? answer your phone!
The invisible timer ticked louder, faster.
By 8:24, you had called him a total of 15 times.
The dining room was packed and poppin' by now, making shame cloud your shoulders from taking up precious optimal space on a popular date night. In truth, you didn't notice just how busy the dining room had gotten, but you know what they say? "Time flies when you're having fun," but it fucking trudges by in a mocking, lazy taunt when being actively humiliated.
At 8:32, your bottle of wine was polished off and you finally texted Richie: hey Cousin, is Carmy with you?
He answered within a fucking minute: no he left over a while ago for a date with Claire Bear
A record scratched in your brain, rapidly typing: what??? what does that mean???
Richie replied: damn, Cuzzo, you should know what a date is or has it been that long? 😂
Your throat swelled shut, nodding sadly and locking your phone; rolling your lips between your teeth to prevent yourself from having a very public, very emotional breakdown.
The invisible timer ticked slower, quieter.
With a sharp sniffle, you flagged Laura down, pointed at the menu, asking for your meal to-go and the check. She could hear the warble in your voice, so when she returned with your to-go order and check, Laura had snuck a couple extra things in your bag without charging you. And she only charged you for a glass of wine, not the bottle.
Laura earned herself a generous gratuitous tip as well as all the cash in your wallet, being a little over $150.
Returning home around 9:03, you could identify the dreadful feelings of rejection; how forgotten, taken for granted, disappointed, abandoned, replaced you felt. Unloading the food on the counter, you made yourself a plate and looked at your phone one last time. There was still nothing from Carmy, but Richie had texted you again: you good, Cuzzo? what you need Carmy for?
Changed into a set of cozy clothes, you curled up on the couch with your food and another glass of wine; faithful, loyal, loving dog(go) hopping up beside you. Switching something on the TV, you answered Richie with one hand while fending off the pup: nothing important anymore, Cuzzo. we can talk tomorrow!
It was a strange sensation; that blatant sting of betrayal and rejection from someone who was never supposed to hurt you. If Carmy didn't return your affection, that was okay! That was perfectly fine! That was ideal, even, because you never wanted to jeopardize losing him from your life so even if you couldn't be with him, you'd rather be his friend than nothing at all. But what isn't okay, is standing you up. Forgetting you. Neglecting you. Unjustly shaming you. Publicly humiliate you. Disrespecting you. After over a decade of friendship, didn't you deserve better than that? Of course, you did - so why did Carmy subject you to such degradation? Was Claire so hypnotizing, enchanting, bewitching, she successfully managed to block all your Carmy sensors? Or were you just that forgettable?
There were too many overwhelming emotions pinballing around your heart, mind, and soul to even begin processing. So, you cuddle your most loyal companion who would never betray or abandon you, ate what you could, polished off any wine, set several alarms on your phone, and laid down on your couch to be lulled into restlessness by the sounds of whatever comfort show was left on.
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After getting up early to shower off the previous night, you got ready for work and made the trek through the city. While your couch was comfortable, you didn't sleep well; eyes heavy from their sting, second cup of coffee already in your travel mug, movements sluggish. You would've called out, but today was one of those days you had to go over some legal and logistical shit with your Uncle Cicero.
So here you were.
"Yo, Cuzzo! Hey-hey, good mornin', sweetheart!"
With a tired sigh, you spied Richie outside The Beef, smoking, watching you with a smirk. "Mornin', Richie-Rich," you tried to sound as if you hadn't been awake all night.
"Well, don't you look fuckin' peachy?"
"Fuck off, I'm not in the mood."
He held a hand out to prevent you from passing him, asking, "Yo... Hold on, what's good with you? And don't feed me no bullshit, I know something's wrong. You look like shit - but I mean that in concern, Cuzzo."
You decided not to comment, answering instead, "I just didn't sleep last night."
"Uh-huh... And?"
"And what?"
"That's it?"
You shrugged, "Nothing else worth dwelling over."
Richie cocked his head, "The fuck does that mean? Here," he offered his cigarette, which you accepted.
"Nothing's wrong, can we just - "
"Fuck all the way off," he scoffed, "you know the sooner you tell me, the sooner I stop askin'."
"It's... It's really stupid, Cousin."
"Don't make no difference to me; if it's bothering you, tell me."
You dropped the butt of the cigarette to the sidewalk, squashing it under your heel before leaning back into the wall with a long sigh. "I should preface this all by admitting, I might have feelings for Carmy - "
"Yeah, no fucking shit," Richie laughed, seeing your deadpanned expression. "Dude, holy shit, everyone can see it except you two idiots, it was high time someone admitted it. Tina and Mikey used to have a bet going about y'all ending up together."
Your frown deepened. "Right, well, glad everyone's so entertained and well-versed on my doomed love life," your eyes rolled.
"'Doomed'?" Richie chuckled, stopping when your expression turned crestfallen, rushing, "Woah, hey, I'm just teasin' you. C'mon, Honey, tell me how you're doomed?"
You were quiet, staring at your sneakers as you tried to build the courage to verbalize the situation. See, once you said it out loud (and to anyone), it becomes tangible, public, and undeniably real. You didn't want this to be real.
Just as Richie was opening his mouth to question (or nag) you, you admitted, "Carmy and I had plans to go to dinner last night..."
Richie paused, then asked, "But he was with Claire?"
"Exactly."
"I... Don't think I follow, Cuzzo?"
You huffed, "Cousin, Carm asked me to dinner, right?" Richie nodded. "He picked the time and place, then apparently, made plans with Claire but didn't tell the other. So, I got there last night, right? I waited for two hours, Cousin, but Carmy never showed, never answered my messages. He stood me up. He chose Claire."
"Are you fucking serious?"
"Unfortunately."
"Wait, lemme get this straight. So, he asked you out?"
"Yes."
"And made a legit plan? To link up? Time, place, whole thing?"
"Yeah."
Richie readjusted his stance, his anger flaring - reminding you of the diagram Lilo drew for Stitch to show how full of 'bad' he was. "And you're saying, you got there, waited for him for hours - fuckin' plural - and he didn't show up? No text, no call, no nothing?"
"Correct. I called and texted plenty, though. No answer."
"Right, but he didn't cancel your date when Claire came in the picture? Or vice versa, what-the-fuck-ever?"
"Nah."
"Just left you there? Alone?"
"Yep."
"Hold up, hold up. Homie made a date with Claire Bear before or after he made one with you?"
"Now that, I don't know. But does it matter which date came first, he still stood me up for someone else."
Richie blinked a few times, nodding silently with pursed lips. Then he snarled and tried to surge past you for the door, "Oh, I'll fuckin' kill him - "
"Yo, yo, yo, hang on! Wait, hold up! Leave it be, Cousin, it's not worth the hassle - "
"Nah, nah, nah! He doesn't get off scot-free! Nobody puts Baby in a corner and nobody fucks with Honey!" The two of you tussled on the sidewalk, you refusing to let him pass but him being stronger. It was quite the sight.
"No more Dirty Dancing references!"
"Hater! Lemme go, Honey!"
"Listen to me! Please, for fuck's sake! I don't want this to be anything bigger than it already is! Listen to me, I just want to get some work done with Cicero and go home. Okay? Okay? Goddamnit, Richie! It's not the time for this! Leave it alone for today! I just want peace!"
Richie eventually calmed down enough to let you push him back a couple feet. It took two more cigarettes, but you managed to pacify Richie enough for you to enter The-under-construction-Beef together, discovering most employees already present. Yet, in a rare and odd occurrence, Carmy wasn't; which would've normally confused or worried you, but now, only relieved you. As project manager, you worked intimately with Carmy on a daily basis - which poses as an obstacle if you were trying to avoid him - but without him, you could focus on getting work done and not dodging him.
"Behave," you reminded Richie in a lower register. He swatted at you, picking at a donut Marcus created.
"Mornin', Miss Mamas," Tina greeted, glancing over her shoulder to flash you a warm smile - requiring a double take. "Oh, baby, you look exhausted."
"I feel exhausted," you cleared your throat, greeting her with a quick peck to her cheek.
"Oh! So she can say it and it's fine? But when I do it, it's an issue? This is hypocrisy! Double standard bullshit!" Richie barked with laughter, shuffling past with a swift peck to your temple. Tina pushed at his belly as he passed, making him grunt and flinch dramatically.
You asked Tina, "Is Cicero here yet?"
"In the back with Sugar, baby."
"Thank you, Chef."
Richie watched you walk away from Tina only for Marcus to stop you, then Ibrahim needed something and it looked like everyone was gearing up to bring some kind of problem to your plate. Like a good cousin, Richie swooped in to place a donut in your hand, "All right, all right, back off, you jagoffs, let the lady breathe." He shooed you onward, feeling protective enough to intercept anyone to give you the space you needed after last night. You told him you wanted to work and go home, so he was going to do what he could to give that to you. The moment you disappeared into the office, Richie hissed to any surrounding employees, "Get the fuck over here!"
"The fuck, Richie?" Tina snipped, "We got work t'do, baby."
"I know," he rushed, glancing over his shoulder, then back at the others, "but I want everyone to go. Fuckin'. Easy. On Y/N today. Okay? Got it? She's got some shit to do with Cicero and then she's gonna go home - so, let's make sure that happens, no exceptions."
"What happened? What's wrong? Is she okay?" Marcus asked in concern, his frown deep enough to lower his brows.
"Yeah, Richie, you can't say that and then not explain," Syd tacked on. "I'll talk to her. -"
With grit teeth, Richie scooted in front of Syd and warned, "Hey. She's my fuckin' family, right? I'll protect her from anything - including you jagoffs, so leave her alone today. Okay? That's all I'm asking - Leave. Her. Alone." He glanced around and lowered his voice as the others all dipped inward to hear him, "Fuckin' Carmy asked her onna date last night then stood her up and went out with Claire instead."
This caused an angry ripple to emit from the huddle. You were none the wiser; in the office, sat at the desk to go over what Sugar had prepared for your review. Cicero leaned on the desk beside your chair, arms crossed, just watching you as if a bug under a magnifying glass. He pushed his glasses up by one finger to the noseband, glancing at Sugar and asking, "You all right, doll?" There was a pause, then a hand nudged your shoulder, "Honey? You hear me?"
"Hmm?" You looked up, "Oh, wait, sorry, were you talkin' to me, Unc?"
"Yeah, darling. I mean, you look pretty tired, just asking if you're all right?"
"Wow, I come into work as my most beautiful, natural self and all anyone can say is I look tired?" You laughed, trying to lighten the mood, "Maybe I do need make-up."
"You're also in joggers."
"I didn't feel like putting jeans on this morning, sue me."
"And you're quiet as hell."
"So? Usually you're telling me to shut up."
"You have a college degree in yapping," Cicero chuckled, "so when you go silent, I know something's wrong."
"I'd have multiple PhD's if yapping was a real major," you joked. "But I promise, Unc, I'm all right. I didn't sleep last night, so, after we get this shit done, I'm gonna head out."
"Are you sure?"
"Positive, Unc. Tell you what, you can even drive me home when we're done."
Cicero nodded, "Good deal. Then, let's get crackin'."
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It was the worst timing in the History of Clocks.
Pete called Sugar several times, so she finally answered when Cicero needed to run to the restroom; leaving you alone and defenseless in the office as Richie was out back for a smoke break. Carmen apparently arrived just in time, all but bolting into the office when he didn't immediately clock you in the kitchen.
The invisible timer began to tick.
"There you are!" Carmy gasped, startling you enough for your knees to bang up into the desk. "Ohhh, shit," he blinked when you grunted and rubbed your legs, "I'm so sorry, Honey, that was my fault, I should've called or something as I came in."
"It's fine, Carmen. Look, uh," you gestured to the paperwork before you, "we're almost done here, do you need something or can it wait? Kinda your restaurant on the clock..."
"I mean, it can wait, but are you busy, like, right now-right now? 'Cause, lookit, I gotta tell you, I had the best fucking night. I'm so serious, Honey. I went out with Claire - you remember Claire, right? - and it was, wow, just wow - I mean, this girl is the whole package, you know?" You bristled when he took a seat on the edge of your workspace and realized he was carefully avoiding usual pet names. He continued to ramble on about his incredible date with the incredible Claire, missing your lips pursed in patient annoyance as you listened to him without reaction; staring emotionlessly at the laptop screen. "Hey," Carmy waved a hand in front of you, causing you to flinch and automatically look towards him - albeit in annoyance. "Where are you right now? You're not here, in the present with me. You all right?"
You couldn't help but bite, "Mhm. Where's your phone?"
The invisible timer ticked louder, faster.
"What?"
"Your phone, Carmy, the thing you pay a monthly bill for so people can get in touch with you, or you with them. Ring any bells? Where's your phone, it'll play bells for you."
"Woah, hey," his hands went up in defense, "what's with the hostility? I left my phone somewhere here last night, Honey."
"Oh, sure. How convenient - "
"No, look, I'm serious - look, look around the fuckin' desk!"
You glared at him before shuffling the few papers and files, ready to snarl at him when you found his phone. "Why's it here?" You asked stiffly, handing over the shut-off device.
"I forgot it, I was in a bit of a rush."
"There a reason for your rushing?"
"Yeah, to get to my date with Claire - see, you weren't even listening to me, were you?" He let a twinge of frustration taint his tone, "You wanna bite my fuckin' head off about my fuckin' phone that I forgot at work, fine; but you're so mad about it that you didn't even listen to me? Jesus, fuck, who are you, my mother?"
You swear you heard 'oooohs' coming from outside the office.
"Oh, fuck you, Carmen! How about you check your messages before trying to come at me, you fuckin' bitch," you snapped, slapping your laptop closed and starting to pack up the desk.
"What the fuck are you so pissed off for? 'Cause I didn't text you 'goodnight' or 'good morning'? Grow the fuck up - "
"Hey!" Cicero charged into the office, interrupting the argument. "I don't know what the fuck is happening, but we're busy in here, Carmy - "
"No, actually... Actually, we're done for the day, Unc, I can do everything else at home."
"No, Honey, hang on - "
You stood abruptly to gather the last files from the desk, "No, it's fine, I'm exhausted anyway. I got stood up last night waiting for this jackass, so as you can imagine, I just want to go home, away from any and all others right now."
"Woah, hang on," Carmy pleaded, checking his repeatedly dinging phone he managed to turn on, "wait, what the fuck is this? Why did you call me - holy shit, seventeen times?!"
"Could you drop me at home, Uncle?" You pleaded softly.
"Of course, princess, but what the fuck is going on?"
You could only manage a fake, sad smile, "Carmy's the jackass who stood me up last night."
"No fuckin' shit!" Cicero gasped, looking between you. "Uh, yeah, yeah, Honey, sure, I can take you home, c'mon, let's go."
"I left these for Sugar, they're all filled out if she can just file them - the rest I can do from home," you tapped the files left behind, leading the way out of the office; Carmy stood to the side in shock as he caught up on his messages. "Think we could grab something to eat on the way?" You asked, desperate for distraction.
"Whatever you want, doll, of course," Cicero agreed easily, following you at a close range. The others scattered like roaches, pretending they weren't listening, but... C'mon... You know?
The invisible timer ticked louder, faster.
"Wait! Wait, Honey! Please, hang on," Carmy called after you, repeatedly shouting your name. "Wait, please, wait, wait, wait, hang on!" He pleaded in a race against time to clear the kitchen and reach you before you could walk away from him for good. His hand wrapped around your upper arm in a desperate attempt to stop you, but it only made you flinch.
"Carmen," Cicero spat in warning.
"It's okay, Unc. It's okay, we should probably hash this out, you know? I can - I'll meet you out front," you promised softly, patting his arm raised to protect you from Carmy's grab.
The invisible timer ticked louder, faster.
Cicero gave a 'harrumph' and pushed his glasses back up the bridge of his nose, glaring at Carm before taking his leave. You huffed and crossed your arms, turning to face your best friend, sneering, "What could you possibly have to say to me? You said enough last night."
"The fuck does that mean, we didn't even talk!"
You snapped, "Your silence was really fucking informative, Carmen!"
"That's what you're not fucking explaining to me! I don't even know what you're mad about!"
There was satirical amusement donning your expression as you gave a gruff chortle of disbelief. So, you broke it down, "By you not canceling the second you and Claire made plans or remembered you made plans with her first, by not answering me all night and humiliating me, leaving me there, alone, so you could go out with Claire said all I needed to hear. It was all you had to say. You were so fucking loud, it's a miracle I haven't burst an eardrum!"
"Honey," he sighed like you were a child throwing a tantrum, "it was an honest mistake. I don't get why you're blowing this up? We've literally forgotten about plans before, just help me understand why this one is so different? I want to fix this, tell me what the fuck is going on!"
Speaking of bursting an eardrum, the invisible timer ticked louder, faster.
Tears broke your waterline, "You've always been my best friend, Carm."
"You're mine, too - "
"But at some point, things changed for me. I get it's a personal problem, so I kept quiet because I loved being your friend, being in your life - I tried not to be greedy, but now I see we were just racing this inevitable clock. When you and I went through everything with Mikey, I thought it made us closer, stronger - "
"It did!"
" - but I also thought that maybe you weren't seeing me as before, as some kid, but as I am now - a woman."
"Honey..."
"Let me finish," you bit off, tears dripping down both your cheeks. "I still never said anything, I never wanted to pressure you, and truthfully, I always knew you had a thing for Claire, I knew one day someone would come around and replace me, but I still loved you. Despite everything with my family, with yours, I loved you. Despite any of my own reservations, my own fear about ruining what we have because it's better than losing you completely, I loved you. Despite the physical distance and all of your emotional distance, I loved you. And then, you come up to me, out of nowhere, and you asked me to go out with you. Twice, you phrased it that way, Carm."
"Honey, baby, please - "
"You asked me to go out with you, you set the time and place, I agreed. I showed up... I sat there as people came and went through the night, Carmen. It was humiliating an-and degrading and mortifying. Only to find out within seconds from Richie that you had left for a date with Claire - when there I was, alone, waiting for you, too. Like I said, I always knew you had a thing for her, and I knew one day someone would replace me, but holy fucking shit, Carm, I thought you had a little more decency, more respect than that after years of friendship - "
"How could you say that to me?" Carmy snapped with tears racing down both your cheeks, mindful of the distance as to not crowd you. "Knowing you're my best friend, the only person - "
"How could you leave me there, Carmen!?" You cried, making him freeze. "That was downright cruel and so fucking hurtful. So much so, in fact... I-It makes me feel we shouldn't talk for a while."
"What?"
"I'm so sorry, Carm, but I just - I don't think it's fair to anyone involved, nor those around us, to remain friends right now. So, we just... Need a break, or something. Being your friend is too fucking hard and so exhausting, it's been at my expense... We just need a break."
"No, hey, h-h-hang on a second, baby, wait, please," he halted you from turning away. "Listen to me, please, I'm so sorry. I really am, sweetheart, I'm so fucking sorry. Okay? I-I'm so sorry I forgot my phone and didn't see your calls or texts - "
You let your hand wave as if to physically pause the conversation, breathing, "That's what you think I'm upset about?"
"Well, yeah, and I'm sorry I couldn't call you, but you saw, you found it - I forgot my phone!"
"No... No, you didn't forget your phone, Carmen. Jesus Christ, you forgot me," you whispered, taking two steps back so he couldn't touch you even if he tried. "I really don't think we should talk anymore, okay? What you did was really fucked up, what you made me feel was even worse. I'll still help with the restaurant, I promised I would, and unlike you, I can be taken for my word because it means something. But I don't think you and I should work together, you make me so fucking uncomfortable - "
"No, hey, wait, baby, please, listen, listen, listen - I made one mistake," he pleaded, trying to step towards you but you reared back another three. "W-Why're you punishing me - punishing us - for one mistake? Please, Honey, I know I fucked up, but let me fix this!"
"Well, a stitch in time saves nine."
"The fuck?" Carmy chided, eyes narrowed.
"It means by doing proper the first time, you avoid problem later - but you don't have a lick of accountability, do you? No forethought, no comprehension to how your actions will affect others! It's not just 'one mistake', it's not just you standing me up, Carmy! Jesus, fuck, it's everything! I just poured my fucking heart out and you can't even say you love me back, can you?" You gave no time to answer, "No, of course not, because it's Claire - it's always gonna be Claire! It's always gonna be someone! So, I-I can't play second fiddle anymore, I won't - I can't be in love with you while you're in love with someone else, Carm. You've kept me on your back burner for too long, you forgot me, so you're not allowed to be surprised the kettle still whistles. I just can't do this, Carm, it's complicated and it hurts, it's not fair to either of us. So, I'll remove myself, no problem and work from home, but if I have to be here, please, limit our interactions best you can. For my sake, I'm begging you, give me fucking space."
"You're just gonna throw us away? I fuck up once, and that's it? Just like that?" Carmy begged, sounding earnestly confused. He looked like a kicked puppy. It broke your heart in a way last night couldn't. "I made one mistake, Honey, okay, yes, I take full responsibility! Please, let me try to fix this, okay? Please? I'm so sorry, I know that doesn't cover it, but lemme try to make all of this up to you. C'mon, baby, please, don't let me be the reason we both lose - just - okay, just let me fix this, please!"
"No, you know what? I'm not throwing anything away, I never did, Carm, you did when you chose Claire over me," you shrugged, tears strangling you once more. "Now, I need space... Can you give that to me or is that too much to ask for?"
"Why're you talkin' t'me like that? I-I'll give you whatever you ask for, Honey, you know that," Carmen sniffled, eyes reddening by the minute; hands going from hips to hair to forehead and back, unsure what to do.
You managed to get out, "I don't even know you anymore, it seems," before fleeing the kitchen, lungs choking on nothing. You couldn't get air in. You couldn't push any out, it was all so choppy and violent. With a hollow chest, you escaped out the front door; hating that you had to ignore Sugar and Richie calling after you, stumbling on the sidewalk and into Cicero's idling car.
"All right, let it out, you're all right, Honey. You're safe with Uncle Cicero," he soothed, rubbing your back as he pulled into traffic. "I know, I know... We all know, I'm so sorry this happened. What a fuckin' jagoff - you want me to pull my money from this restaurant? I'll do it - I'll do whatever - "
"No, no, no," you whimpered, sniffling and wiping your cheeks. "While I appreciate your ready and willingness to defend me, I don't want it at Carm's expense. I'll just work from home, it's not a big deal, and then... Maybe if I have to come in, I know Richie will be there to be a buffer, but maybe you could - "
"I'll be there whenever you ask, princess, you know that."
"Thank you," you squeaked as he drove past your usual street. "Oh, uh, I'm down South - "
"I thought we could make a run to the store, make sure you have all your comfort snacks so you don't have to go back out. Or do you wanna go straight home? You tell me, princess."
You gave a watery smile, a new wave of emotion choking your words, "Snacks would be really nice, thank you."
"You have dinner?"
"I don't know - "
"We'll get you some," he comforted, patting your knee as you just needed a safe space to cry. And for now, that was the front seat of your Uncle Cicero's 6-figure car.
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You knew it was a formal invitation the moment you caught sight of it at your doorstep, indicating it was hand-delivered and not sent through the mail. It sent a flurry of unknown emotion through your veins; angry by its arrival, yet excited by what it meant. With a glance up and down the hall of your apartment landing, you found yourself alone; bending to pluck up the envelope and enter your home. Keys to the bowl, shoes left at the door in the foyer, coat hung up, purse deposited to the available end table; phone being pocketed as you turned for the kitchen to drop all mail on the counter.
You didn't open anything.
Instead, you got on with your evening after working your usual 9-5. After a steaming-hot shower, you smeared on a facemask to hydrate your tired skin; then shimmied into soft loungewear and fixed your hair for the night. In the living room, you turned on Netflix for background noise before scouring your kitchen for an appropriate dinner that would hopefully nourish you after such a busy day. You debated a glass of wine, thinking you didn't need it, but then pouring one as the glittering envelope taunted you from where you left it. You drank, glaring at the little piece of stationary as you cooked a simple stir fry concoction. Carmy taught you to clean while you cook, so, once your meal was dished up and whatever could've been stored in the dishwasher was, you poured yet another glass of wine, snatched the invitation, then nestled in the living room with your meal.
You still didn't open it.
The coffee table was larger than others; big enough to double as a work desk; the perfect height for you to still access while lounged back on the sofa. You had all kinds of documents spread, most pertaining to The Bear - which was finally set to open in about a week. It would've been an exhilarating time of celebration... Should you have been able to feel anything other than outright heartache.
For weeks now, you hadn't spoken to Carmy, the longest you've gone in your lives. You simply weren't ready to face the other side of rejection; spending this time building yourself up as an independent woman who didn't need no man, even if that man was your best friend. The idea that there was no place for you in Carmy's life or room for him in yours felt farfetched and illegal in some manner, as if it were taboo. You had a lot of navigating to do, and much farther to go, but for now, you were still in the adjustment phase. Never had you been without each other, it was weird to think this was it, there wasn't any going back; at least, not from you, yet, after such a putrid display of disrespect.
While you were stood up in just one restaurant, you avoided the entire marketplace as a whole out of sheer embarrassment. Granted, it wasn't a place you frequented, but it was still a hotspot some other friends had discovered and wanted to meet at for your weekly hang-outs. You couldn't tell them how triggered you felt because you didn't want to limit places to go, so, you figured bailing on them was the better option. It's not like you lied when you said you couldn't see them because of work - which was typically really crazy - but you could still make time if you wanted to; you had before. That's how much Carmy's hurt debilitated you, though.
Your plate was left to the side, dog sniffing around in the hopes of licking up whatever scraps you might've dropped; one hand holding the glass of wine, the other pinching the envelope by the corner. Deciding it was now or never, you ripped open the seal and retrieved the contents with delicate fingers, as if it would burn you.
The invisible timer started to tick.
You ignored the use of parchment paper. You ignored the perfume slightly wafting from it. You ignored the familiar script in silky ink. You ignored the certain choices you remember picking out, now used officially on the friends and family opening night invite.
You smiled sadly, letting the parchment card fall to the envelope left on the coffee table's corner. You took a long breath in, jaw wriggling; tears slowly forming, but not falling. For weeks, you had avoided any direct reminder of what happened; knowing you still worked as project manager, but able to sort of schedule your emotions around deadlines and necessary interactions. This particular piece of mail was impending, but unexpected today; where being invited to see the completed restaurant you helped design and erect was all but expected - just not today, per se. While every fiber of your being wanted to attend, nothing felt right about accepting when you knew you'd more than likely run into Claire and would have to interact with the others.
It felt too soon.
You had no right to go around any of them anymore.
What would you say?
Sniffling your emotion with a deep sigh, you leaned back to your back couch cushion with the last of your wine tipping to your mouth. While petting your pooch fondly, you wrestled mentally pros and cons, different logistics, like: who did you message your rejection or acceptance to? Did you bring a date? Did you go with Cicero? Were you supposed to wait after the crowd cleared to mingle with your friends? Were they still your friends? What did you wear? Should you make legit plans with other people so you had plenty of distraction that evening? So you had a solid alibi? Would anyone even question your absence?
Your dog whined when your phone vibrated violently in a phone call from another cushion. With a sigh, you leaned forward to set your wine glass down and snatch the offending object, answering, "Hey, Unc."
"Hey, princess. You busy? This a bad time?"
"No, no, I just finished dinner and am trying to will myself to finish the dishes. What're you up to?"
"Gettin' ready for bed - just wanted to check in on you..."
"Ohhh, I get it - so, you got a pretty little invite in the mail, too, huh?"
"I got something, yeah. I think it looks pretty nice, don't you think? Definitely Sugar's design."
You held back your sarcastic quip about how you had all but designed the invites, so, you answered instead, "Yeah, real nice, Unc, yeah, she's got real talent. You goin'?"
"Uh-huh, no beating 'round the bush with you, is there?" He sighed, making you smirk broadly, "I am, I'm goin', gotta visit my money, you know? Well, I was wonderin' if you wanted to go with me?"
"Oh, Unc - "
"I know, I know, but it could be nice. Just us! Or we could double date? My treat - I'm paying - "
"I don't know if I can go yet, I haven't checked my schedule. I got home, made dinner, ate, answered your call."
"Oh, shit," he laughed. "Well, you think about it and let me know, Honey, okay? Okay, seriously, it'll be nice, we can go together, or separate - you know, don't let me cramp your style."
You laughed, "Nah, you kinda up my game."
"As I should. All right, pumpkin, well, I should run - but you think about it, let me know what you think, okay?"
"Okay, Unc, sounds good. We'll talk soon, I love you. Goodnight."
"Love you, too, doll, goodnight."
The invisible timer ticked louder.
The invitation was the only thing clipped to the front of your fridge. It taunted you at every passing moment. For days, it demanded your attention - succeeding only because you knew you had to RSVP to someone. Friday loomed closer and closer, Cicero had sent you two reminder texts, and try as you might, the fracture to your heart wasn't easily plastered.
There was nothing but heavy pain each time you thought about attending, so, on Wednesday night, you texted Sugar: hey babe! love that F&F is happening! sadly i have some work shit to do so i can't be there ☹️💔 but the invites are gorgeous! congrats on everything, i can't wait to see it! thanks for thinking of me for the guest list! good luck on Friday! 😘
Then you texted Cicero you couldn't make it, and while he understood, Sugar replied: Thank you, my love. Fak was so proud to show us how to work Canva for those invites 😂 Sure there isn't anything I can do to change your mind? We'd all love to see you there!
You answered: no way, this looks like real handwriting! technology's going too far. and yeah babes, i'm sure, i got work shit so unless you yell at my boss, i'm kinda stuck 😂
Curiously, Sugar requested a photo of your invite; but without curiosity, she also requested your boss' phone number. After you sent the image, she replied: Oh wow! I guess Carmy went rogue and gave you a fancy handwritten invite. What a jerk. Is he still a jerk? I can't remember, we haven't talked about what happened! 🥲
You promised: nothing to talk about now, Sugar Mama. all good! i gotta run but i love you congrats again, gooooooooodnight! ❤️
You hated avoidance; the dejection, festering unworthiness, self-imposed punishment and isolation. Yet it was all you had now, rationalizing you were protecting yourself and this was a necessary defense for your newly instated peace. Sometimes, you had to do things like miss events because you're healing - and that should always take precedence because you were nobody's priority but your own.
You put a red line on your calendar through the words 'THE BEAR', nodding as if in assurance of your decision, then yanked the invitation from your fridge. Yet you hovered over the trash can, fingering the lettering and remembering Sugar's text: Carmy went rogue and gave you a fancy handwritten invite.
The trash can lid slammed shut.
The invisible timer ticked slower, quieter.
In your bedroom, you pulled a handheld trunk from your closet and knelt to the floor. Inside the trunk, you had placed all triggering Carmy centric mementos and memorabilia; dropping the invite to the towering piles. You carefully pushed some letters out of the way to pick up the journal he gifted from Denmark; flipping it open to any random page for study. Then you compared it to your invite and let a small, fond smile tug on yours lips; confirming it was Carmy's script, that he had, indeed, gone rogue.
When the trunk shut, so did the lid of your feelings.
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Opening night had been something of a disaster, but the staff was ready to handle whatever obstacle. Granted, the head chef getting locked in the walk-in freezer wasn't on anyone's bingo card, Sydney was still a fucking superstar and commanded the kitchen in a gorgeously fluid and respectful manner. Richie stepped up and proved he was a newly-appointed expert in hospitality. Fak could take... some... direction. All in all, while not ideal or what was expected, it was an incredibly successful opening night! The staff was all rightfully proud of themselves, riding euphoric adrenaline highs.
The invisible timer began ticking.
Despite knowing Carmy had been freed from the freezer, nobody could locate him. Some theorized he went home to blow off steam, others teased maybe he went home with Claire - missing the way she left in tears earlier. However, when Tina, Fak, Syd, and Richie left the kitchen, they paused and let their proud smiles drop upon discovery of Carmy sitting, alone, in a back booth of his restaurant.
A dim, yet unmistakable comparison to what he did to you months ago.
There was temptation to leave him there; the entirety of the staff pissed off to the point they were giving Carm the cold shoulder for what he did to you. They credited you with damn near everything "The Bear" was, because while not your idea, not your dream, you gave it life and brought this place into fruition. Not to mention, you had taken on work as project manager for free - paid in the value of knowing you were helping such a good cause. A good family. It was a repeating fact; your everlasting endearment and compulsive support for anything and everything 'Berzatto'.
Yet despite their own simpering feelings, it was all dwarfed on examination of Carmy's decidedly pathetic statue. Syd felt a level of guilt the entire night, feeling it increase on sight of her technical boss; but to Fak, Richie, and Tina, who took Carm's slight against you personally, this was a heart-melting sight. There was a strange, mutual desire where the group went from wanting to kick Carmy's ass to just wanting to give him a hug and help the poor emotionally-inept dumbass.
"Go," Tina snarled quietly, pinching Richie's under arm.
"Me!?" He spat in shock, "Man, hell nah, fuck that guy!"
"Fuck you, too, Richie, c'mon," Sydney chided, pushing past them to lead the way up to Carmy. "Uh... Heeey, Chef?" She greeted in an unsure, sing-song voice.
"Chefs," he nodded meekly, immediately looking back to his anxiously twiddling fingers.
"Hey, Carm," Fak smiled warmly. "Whatcha doin' here, bud? Why're you all alone? In the dark? That's kinda creepy, dude."
"Nah, nothin'. Just, uh... Just waitin'."
"For what?" Fak asked, Richie smacking his arm. The tattooed man with a mustache flinched and cried, "What!? Now I can't ask my friends questions!? He's the one sitting in the dark like the Undertaker! Jesus!"
"Dude, just pause, be quiet," Richie scolded, shaking his head to silence the confused Fak. At Carmy, Richie directed, "Yo, Cousin, c'mon, let's just - let's all go home. C'mon, man, let's go. It's closing time."
"Yeah, yeah, uh," Carmy sniffled, "you guys go 'head, I'm gonna wait up for a bit."
"Carmy, it's late," Syd tried, "we aren't just gonna leave you here. So, come with us."
"Yeah, baby, c'mon," Tina tacked on in sympathy, "it's been a helluva night, we should all get some rest."
Fak and Syd and Tina all tried to encourage him with them, but Richie remained silent; just surveying the Chef. When a natural lull came after Carmy insisted again they go on without him, Richie scoffed, "Dude, c'mon... You know she's not comin'."
The invisible timer ticked louder, faster.
"Richie," Tina hissed.
"What?" He barked with his hand raised, glaring at Carm. "C'mon, man, it's late, she knew what time this was - and she told Sugar she couldn't make it 'cause of work. That's pretty definite. So... So, c'mon, let's go, dude, she's not comin'."
Before anyone could intervene again, Carmy snapped, "You don't know her like I do, Cousin."
"Know what? Fine," Richie laughed sardonically, "fucking fine, rot here for all I care, man - "
"No, c'mon, Richie! Hey! Don't be like that!" Tina called after him, sighing in defeat. "Sorry, Chef, I gotta run - " She leaned into the booth to peck Carmy's cheek before rushing her farewells to the others, then running out the door, calling, "Richie! Wait, baby, hold on!"
Sydney and Fak awkwardly stood around, not knowing what to do or say, so Carmy insisted they go home, too; he was gonna wait just a little longer for you then head out. They believed him, or at least, enough to listen to their bodies and go home for some form of rest. Carmy twisted the locks on all doors after them, leaving only the front undone with his seat facing directly forward.
The invisible timer ticked louder, faster.
He waited with his elbows on bouncing knees. He waited and devised his nonnegotiable list. He waited with his feet in the booth. He waited while rearranging his ideal table setting. He waited and redid the tape in the walk-in. He waited on the sidewalk, chain smoking. He waited while scrubbing the kitchen, top-to-bottom. He waited and took liquor inventory.
He waited, replaying the events of your fight in his mind. He hated what he said, how he behaved, the expression on your face; praying you'd accept his olive branch - thinking a handwritten invitation was enough. Carmy just assumed you'd remember he was better at talking rather than writing or texting - hoping his script was enough for you to know he wanted to see you in person, not just send messages of apology. He wanted you to have space, he thought a couple of months was enough; so, hopefully you were still fluent in the words he never spoke or wrote.
This inspired Carmy to call Richie's phone to leave a voicemail of apology and love after reminiscing their own fight. It also made him want to call you, too - but this urge was resisted when the image of your heartbroken expression shot to mind.
The invisible timer ticked louder, faster.
Eventually, Carmy settled in the corner booth; arms crossed, feet up, still watching the door. He noted the sun was rising and the city waking up; cars buzzing by, commuters starting to crowd the sidewalk. His eyes burned with the yearn for sleep, yet his mind would not quell; unable to forget your tears, the devastation you showed, how he was the sole cause of it all.
Carmy repeated he was a failure, he let you down and betrayed any and all trust the pair of you had in one another. He should've told you the truth; that he could see himself loving you romantically, he just never thought it was an option, so it purely wasn't on his radar. In Carmy's mind, even trying to cross such an important friendzone could make you feel unsafe if you didn't feel the same way; so it was something he wrote off long ago. It was part of why Claire was so tempting to him, but he needed you - like a fish needed water.
He was able to comprehend (now) that his actions weighed on more than himself, but you, too; that given proximity, you were forever doomed - or destined - to be his collateral damage. Carmy also understood this wasn't a lease you could continue to cosign for any longer when he desecrated the house and home your friendship lived in. So, it was his job to prove he could be the man you fell in love with, that he could deserve you; all he needed was a chance, and it was better late than never.
Understandably, Carmy felt pitiful, purely ridiculous that this is what it took for him to realize nobody mattered to him more than you; nobody could ever compare, there would never be a competition. That he didn't care for Claire's thoughts, opinions, nor ideas like yours; how he found himself wanting to impress you, not her; hating when his phone rang with her ID and not yours. You had given Carmen exactly what he wanted, and yet, it was everything he hated and nothing he needed. Carmy prayed to an unspecified deity that your decade+ friendship was strong enough to withstand - or recover from - his insolence.
Yet when the front door opened, it revealed only Richie; a delight unto itself, but not the ray of sunshine the mournful Chef desired.
The invisible timer ticked louder, faster.
Carmy deflated with definitive defeat into the booth, tears falling in rapid finality. His lips parted just a fraction to let his breath escape in easier huffs, a buzzing whine filling his ears as icy realization washed over him: your friendship was truly well and over.
"Cooked," as the kids say. Your friendship was cooked.
Richie paused in the walkway, sighing deeply before slowly moseying over. He silently placed a twin cup of coffee to the table and dropped to the booth across from Carmy, both silent and stewing. Richie peaked up first, finding Carmen's attention locked on the door like a golden retriever; but the flooding tears halted any derisive comment he instinctively wanted to hurl. Richie asked before taking a sip of coffee, "She didn't show, did she?"
The invisible timer ticked louder, faster.
"Nah, she didn't," Carmy whispered, the tears flowing faster, "'cause I really fucked up this time, Cousin. She's really fuckin' done with me. Not that I blame her, but... But holy shit..." Carmy dissolved into lung-stuttering tears, bowing his head in shame as he obviously attempted to get a handle on his emotions; only ever used to having them freely around you.
Richie sighed and leaned over the table to clap his hand to Carm's shoulder, muttering, "Hey, hey... For what it's worth, I'm really fuckin' sorry, Carmen... I am, I know you love her." His lips rolled between his teeth, letting Carm have his (several, long) moments before trying to sound lighter, "Look, of course, Honey didn't show up to open, but she doesn't have a malicious bone in her body. You haven't shown her you're sorry! She's still pissed off and worse, she's hurt, Cousin! Know what I mean?
"I know," Carmy whispered in despair.
The invisible timer ticked louder, faster.
"So, cut the fuckin' shit, man, time is of the essence! Maybe if you, like, stopped fuckin' cryin' and actually try fuckin' apologizin', Honey'll soften up - you know, like, feel safe enough to come around sometimes. Maybe be a li'l more receptive to you not being so much of a dickhead?"
This made Carmen perk up slowly, pinching the bridge of his nose, questioning, "The fuck are you talkin' 'bout?"
"The fuck did I just say? Get off your ass and apologize to that girl who's so sweet, she's literally called Honey. She's human, she just wants your remorse, dude, you owe it to her; so apologize and leave her be, and when she's ready, she'll let us know, maybe even come back 'round."
The invisible timer ticked slower, quieter.
After a pause, Carmy asked, "Think she'll come back?"
"Only time will tell. Apologize first, you inconsiderate jagoff."
"Way to kick a man."
"We're in this 'cause of you, you fuckin' pussy!"
"Oh, real nice, fuckin' jackass," Carm scoffed, wiping his cheeks and finally accepting the coffee.
"Now you sound like her," Richie smirked, sharing a secret snicker. The pair fell into contented silence, just mulling over each other's nights; either displaying signs of anxiety; where Richie bounced his leg, Carm picked at his fingers wrapped around the cup of coffee.
The invisible timer ticked slower, quieter.
After several too-long minutes, Richie started snickering.
"What're you laughing at?" Carm mumbled.
Richie had to control his giggles, wiping a finger in the corner of his eye, "Something that can only be explained later."
"What's that?"
"...Mikey would've owed Tina about $6k right now."
"The fuck - ?"
"I said later!"
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requesting rules and masterlist
The Bear masterlist
-> no part two planned!
301 notes · View notes
bunny-jpeg · 2 months ago
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hi bunny!!! can i submit a request for kevin magnussen? something like a mafia!au where he’s big and scary except for when he’s with reader?💞
kevin magnussen
cw: smut/pwp, mafia au, mafia boss!kevin, size difference/kink, doggy style, protective!kevin, reader doesn't know he's mafia, creepy men, mentions of blood and violence, body worship
thank you lovely anon for this idea! i know i usually get bakery submissions, but i do accept other ideas you might have! so this was a pleasant surprise in my inbox!
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coming to copenhagen wasn't on your bucket list of dreams. while it was for some, you only took the job because the hours were better. and after a nasty break up only a few months prior, it felt like a good idea to be in another part of the globe. while you missed family, there was something about the unknown that made you pack your belongings (and cat) and head to denmark.
you knew living abroad would have its risks. they were put to rest when you met a tattooed gentleman with the kindest eyes. his name was kevin, kevin magnussen
kevin was an interesting man. you had met him after a blind date fell through and he was at a nearby table by himself. he was waiting for 'friends', but didn't mind spending some time with you. before his 'friends' arrived he ordered you some dessert for after your meal.
he also slipped you a business card and said, "if you need anything in this city, let me know." then smiled at you. the address on the card led to a mechanics shop and kevin told you he owned and "worked" here, but you never saw too many cars come through.
but any questions were met with smiles and promises. you felt a little safer in the city when you were kevin. you one time asked him, "it seems like everyone looks at you when we walk together. or maybe i'm just imagining things."
even though you became accustomed to the public transport of the city. kevin was more than happy to pick you up or drop you off even places like the grocery store. you didn't want to think about all the times he bought you groceries. one time he made you grab another pack of salmon and not to look at the cost. he told you that you can freeze it for a few months. your throat tightened when you saw the price at the check out. but kevin simply paid without a second glance.
maybe you were used to people in your country being paid pennies. you chalked everything up to better wages in denmark.
  “you don't have to pay for things, kevin! really, this job i do pays well enough.” you held onto the front of his zip-up jacket as he carried your groceries back to your apartment. you still didn't know what he saw in you. but, if you couldn't give him the money back, then you'd simply have to keep him smiling. not that it was hard, even your worst jokes made him laugh and wrap his arms around you.
kevin seemed weird, but you found it endearing. when he was all smiles with you, in front of the family he was serious. he could be cold, methodic, dangerous. the light that he brought into your world were the same as the shadows he put into the underbelly of the city. people looked when you went down the street, because it wasn't very often to see him out on the streets. especially with someone so…. cute. 
but, there was something that lingered inside of the danish man you met. kevin saw it with his own two eyes when he entered the bar to meet with you one night. he saw a man at your table trying to chat you up. even with your back turned to kevin, he knew you were uncomfortable. nobody liked unwanted sexual advances.
but you weren't budging giving this man an inch, instead waving him off and eventually he took the cue to leave. but not before he touched you at the small of your back which made you lean away from him in disgust.
kevin saw your mouth move and then take a sip of your drink. at least kevin knew that you could stand up for yourself a little bit. at least enough to get this creep to go away.
eventually he did and when he walked away, kevin followed. no one was touching his girl. you were your own woman of course, you did as you pleased with kevin's support. but, most of the city should've know by now. you were under magnussen protection.
you were too occupied with your drink when the man left for you to notice that kevin had saw the entire thing. and instead of meeting you at your table, he followed the man in the washroom.
kevin wasn't the mechanic he told you he was. the tattoos weren't just from the lifestyle of fixing cars. they all meant something, his past, present and future. his family. his life. the head of an important family in the country. he rolled up his sleeves and the man who was flirting with you noticed him.
"almost done, man." he said as he turned off the tap and shook his hands to dry them. kevin crossed the small bathroom and instantly his fist was in the other man's face. causing him to sprawl out on the tiled floor of the bathroom.
kevin got on one knee down to the other man's level. he grabbed him by the front of the shirt and said, "don't, don't, don't yell." he pulled the bloodied man a little closer, his nose obviously broken, "you're going to leave this place. and you're not going to come back. you do not touch a woman without her permission."
"but i-"
"shh, shh, shh. i saw what you clipped to the back of her pants. a tracker? gps? going to follow her home? kidnap her? sell her? answer me." his voice was firm.
the man looked shaken and bleeding, he was trembling like a leaf at the end of fall. kevin was dangerously close, but didn't want to get blood all over himself. he didn't want you to worry.
"keep yourself out of here. if you don't. not even your dental records will be able to identify you. and if you want a date so badly, stop being a fucking creep." then dropped the man and got up.
the man nodded before he propped himself up against the bottom of the sink. he wiped his bleeding nose and before he could get a word in, kevin was gone.
"min elskede!" kevin's words could be heard and made you look over. you perked up a little bit as your boyfriend sat across from you. you were all smiles now in his presence.
"what happened to your hand?" you asked as you carefully took his hand in yours. you examined the red across his knuckle.
kevin rubbed the top of your head with his other hand, "oh, nothing. i wasn't looking at got it right at the corner of a door. you can kiss it if you want?"
you giggled a little then brought his knuckle to your lips, "what would you do without me, kevin?"
"oh, i don't know. i'd be lost." he smiled back at you.
-
back at your apartment, you were trying to get your socks off. they had little flowers printed on them and were a lovely pair. but it was hard with kevin's lips on your skin.
you squirmed a little and broke the kiss, "please, honey. let me get my clothes off." then burst into giggles when his lips got onto your neck. you ran your fingers through his hair and laughed.
"i can't help it, you're so beautiful." he admitted before he managed to pry himself away from you to let you get undressed. as he undid his button up shirt, he watched you struggle to get out of your jeans and chuckled softly to himself. beautiful little thing you were.
"oh shush." you said as you slipped off your panties, feeling kevin's eyes on you, "i'm alright looking. nothing to write home about."
he took you and pulled him to your chest. he kept those strong arms around you, as if he didn't punch a guy in the face earlier that evening. but, that was simply a part of his life. he had a punch that could kill, but with you. he was so sweet.
eventually you wiggled out of his grasp and got yourself in a further state of undress. soon you naked body was exposed to him and you could feel his hungry gaze on you.
you said as you looked at him, "i'm not a piece of meat, honey."
he reached for you and pulled your naked body next to his. he kissed at your face with such love and said, "of course you're not. you're too important to be meat." then trailed kisses across your body.
you laughed, "oh, c'mon!" you squirmed a little bit and arched your back. your nails rubbed against his scalp. his hips shifted a little bit and his cock rubbed against your thigh.
he knew that if anyone in the family saw him in that moment, they'd think he was a totally different man. the mean boss of the family was reduced to getting head scratches while he worshiped your breasts with his lips.
he said sweet things against you, watching your squirm when his tongue touched your left nipple. he watched your reaction for a moment before he closed his eyes and started to really suck on it. leaving wet trails behind.
his large hands kneaded your breasts and he felt his back arch against you. you felt hot all over and you moaned a little louder. two lovers naked in bed together.
you ran your hands up and down his shoulders, you knew both arms were heavily tattooed. you moaned against his lips before he pulled away and moved away from you. he got you onto your elbows and knees with your ass in the air.
he groped your ass cheek a little bit as he stroked his cock a little bit before he got closer to you once more and rubbed his hard cock up against your slick pussy. he listened to your sweet noises which only excited him more when he slipped his cock in. the angle let him get quite deep inside of you.
"kev!" your back arched a little, "oh. wow! every time." you hit your fist against the bed for a moment. your back arched a little more and you held onto the covers under you.
kevin licked his lips as he kept both hands on you. he loved the feeling of your cunt around his cock. it was his little slice of heaven. all the money from being in the family was something, but to have your sweetness around him made everything feel so much better.
"you're so pretty." he said softly, "you are the most gorgeous thing i had ever laid eyes on. i think about you all day, how much i love you and care for you." he pressed his chest agaisnt your back, then kissed at the back of your shoulders as he rutted against you.
he could feel the pound of his heart as he continued to move against you. his breathing was heavy against your skin as you buried your face into the soft pillows. the pillows he bought for you because you talked so much about how they were just so soft. and you hated to admit that since sleeping with them, your sleeps have improved.
he watched you move a little bit and whine into the covers. you sounded so pretty as he rutted against you. he kissed your shoulders once more.
"please, kev. honey!" you whined.
"you're so beautiful, my love."
his movements continued and the heat in the room grew, especially between the two of you. you could feel the sweat of his chest on your back as he wrapped his arms around you. he kept you close to him as he picked up the pace.
he pushed your further into the bed and worked at your hips. his cock slipped in and out of you perfectly. you were a dream around his cock. the creaking of the bed under you as the two of you made love under the low light of your bedroom.
it was comfortable, it wasn't painful in every way. and it was so good to feel your lover so closely. you panted heavily into the pillows and clutched it tightly. your noises were muffled as he moved. he pressed further into you and knew he wasn't going to last long.
a man capable of such violence was so docile around you. he wanted you so badly. he needed you more than he needed almost anything. his heart sang for you, and when he was away he tried to get home to you as soon as possible.
the dangerous life was common for him, but he didn't want to scare you off. if you knew the truth, would you hate him? would you run away or to the police? would you leave kevin?
he loved you so much, the idea of losing you made him almost scared. he pressed into you as much as he could and fucked you with heavy thrusts. he heard you pant heavily into the covers as he felt the pleasure in his brain.
you whined more as you felt orgasm hit you like a train. you said to your lover, "please, kevin. i love you."
he kissed your cheek and said, "good. because i love you too." then gave a few more thrusts before he finished inside of you with one final movement of his hips. he came with a groan before he slowed to a stop. he rested his face against your shoulder and just let himself feel you for a moment.
"i love you so much." you groaned.
kevin slipped out of you and laid out beside you. you laid next to him and let him wrap himself up around you. like a protective blanket. he pressed soft kisses against you and melted against your heated skin.
he said with his voice close to your ear, "i promise to protect you forever." then kissed the shell of your ear, "all of my days and all of my nights."
you giggled and turned in his arms, "sounds like you're trying to propose to me." your cheeks warmed at the thought.
he smiled down at you, "maybe, but i'll need a ring first." maybe he'll slowly let you into his world. to be closer to him than ever. he wanted you for a lifetime, to love you was an honour as he kept you in his arms while you both calmed down from your climaxes, "it's a secret for now." he said, "have to give you a little surprise."
you buried your face in his chest and giggled, "oh my god, kevin!" you squirmed a little bit on the bed, "you don't need to propose! really! i'm fine being your girlfriend." the idea of marriage made your cheeks hot!
he held your back and smiled into your hair, "even if it is just a ring, you deserve something nice. and if it is pretty enough then no idiot men at the bar will try to make you uncomfortable." he thought about the tracker he took off of you. being married to you was the end goal, but to protect you was a constant in his mind.
he kissed you, tomorrow he'll go ring shopping before his meetings. it'll be a hard choice to pick the perfect ring, but only the best for you. <3
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nolita-fairytale · 5 months ago
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something will happen | chef luca x fem!reader | chapter one
summary: you and luca embark on another a big new adventure together: one of second dreams and second chances. the long-awaited sequel to 'burn your life down.' titled inspired by something will happen - berlioz.
warnings: fluff, light angst, grief, death, second person pov, swearing, danish inaccuracies, off-canon connection to the storyline of the bear.
word count: 1.9k
a/n: it's really happening! i can't promise i'll be updating frequently, but season 3 got me inspired and i've really missed this world. this feels more like an intro than a chapter but here we are anyway. all italicized scenes are a part of the same conversation. i just wanted to play with something new so i hope it makes sense. lmk if you'd like to be tagged.
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masterlist | chapter two
Late Spring
“Well? What do you think?” Luca asks you, the anticipation in the silence between the two of you palpable. 
“I don’t know!” you practically exclaim, all giddy at the mere idea of it. You chew on your lower lip as you wait for him to say something next. 
“I’m just saying. It’s not a half-bad idea and ehm… well, I’ve been thinking about it. A lot, actually,” he reasons with a shrug. He sends a loving glance your way because you look so damn cute wrapped in your twin-sized duvet that makes up one half of the bed you share. 
“For how long?” you ask, cautiously. 
“Dunno,” Luca shrugs. “Ever since Marcus mentioned it, I suppose.” 
He’s almost too casual about this—as if he hasn’t been stuck on the idea for the last month or so since his friend had returned to the States.
This is most certainly not a lazy Saturday morning with breakfast in bed kind of conversation. 
This is a paperwork and really nice pens kind of conversation
A big step.
Huge, even. 
You’ve already agreed to live with the man. 
And now this?
“Luca…” you struggle to get out on an exhale. “I just. It’s not that I don’t want to. I just-.” You pause, collecting your thoughts as you shake off all your nerves before choosing to pivot.
“What if we just-.” you begin again, taking a breath as you brace yourself to jump over this specific cliff. “Total fantasy. No limitations, no logistics, then sure. Okay. We could talk about it.” 
“Alright,” Luca accepts with a nod, a glimmer of mischief in his eyes like he knows he’s got you right where he wants you. He sits up straight, pushing himself off of where he leans against the headboard, shifting so that he’s closer to you. The smile that spreads across his lips begins to grow as repeats your words back to you. “Then, my love, total fantasy. No limitations. No logistics. What’s the dream?” 
—---------------------------------------
Summer
The dream was only supposed to be this—one where you’d begin living with your very sexy and very sweet pastry chef of a boyfriend—and yet, months later, as you move your things into Luca’s Vesterbro flat, your thoughts are consumed by ‘what ifs.’ 
What if you did it? 
What if you opened the restaurant of your shared dreams? 
What if your dreams came true with the love of your life by your side? 
Opening Kokuore had been different. It was your first step towards your next chapter, one where you had moved to Copenhagen in search of a new beginning. But this would be… a proclamation: that you were here to stay, that you and Luca could be something permanent, that you could be more than just romantic partners. 
Proof of a life well-lived and a life well-loved. 
Kokuore had been your dream, your first, your baby. Sure, there’d been talk of expansion—maybe a bigger space, or something along the lines of that—but you hadn’t thought too deeply about a second. 
You hadn’t thought about what would come next. 
And then he did. 
Luca. 
“Need any help, love?” Luca offers, watching you scoop two stacked boxes up into your arms, ready to be hauled into the bedroom. 
“Nope!” you heave with a sigh. “Not with these. But if you could grab the other three I’ll meet you in the closet, babe.”
He smirks, calling after you with a: 
“And what do you suppose we should do there?” 
You chuckle in response, your voice sounding further away as you shout back, “Let’s just unpack a few of my clothes, love, before we start taking them off.” 
—---------------------------------------
“Then, my love, total fantasy. No limitations. No logistics. What’s the dream?” 
You sigh, like you too haven’t been thinking about it since Marcus brought it up in the first place. 
“Okay, I’m not ready yet,” you preface, cautiously. “But. If we were, hypothetically speaking, talking about opening a restaurant together… I kinda love the idea of a brunch spot.” “Like Marcus said.” “Exactly.” 
“Slash bakery.” “Right.” 
“Hypothetically speaking.” “Of course.” 
For a moment, your mind gets away from you, running wild with the fantasy that’s beginning to unfold before your eyes.
“I think I really like the idea of it being a bakery during the weekdays when we’re open,” you admit, an excitement beginning to bubble underneath the surface of all your reasons why you shouldn’t. “Maybe we do Wednesday, Thursday all grab-and-go sort of breakfast stuff in addition to the bakery.”
“Kind of like a NY-style bodega,” Luca adds, building on your idea. “You know. With a little extra finesse.”
“Yes! Then… Friday, maybe, we pivot to full breakfast/brunch till the end of Saturday,” you reply, building off what Luca’s just said. 
“Think Wednesday – Saturday service would work?” he asks curiously, knowing that most places are closed on Sundays in Copenhagen.
“We could try it out. Extend our hours to Sunday down the line IF it feels right,” you reason with enough ease to worry you a little. You begin to back pedal, your mind flooded with doubt. “But-, I don’t know, honey. Don’t you think Copenhagen has enough bakeries?” 
“Not ours! Copenhagen doesn’t have ours yet,” Luca protests, as soon he begins to recognize what’s going on in your head. His excitement and passion alone might convince you to do this as he sits up on his knees, his body language expressing just how fully IN he is on this idea. 
His face changes—he’s only just a little more serious this time—his tone light and voice gentle as he warns you with a: 
“And I’m not letting you talk to yourself out of this.” He crosses his arms over his chest almost as if it’s a challenge. “So tell me more about this bakery-slash-brunch spot you’ve got in mind.” 
“Luca Davies! I don’t know where you get off thinking you can sweet talk me into this,” you scold him teasingly. 
He’s even faster to reply. 
“Oh I think I can.”
And this time, you know it’s a challenge. 
“Fine,” you concede to him, meeting him right in the middle of his challenge. “But I don’t want this to be all about my ideas. Besides, aren’t you the one who’s been thinking about it for months now?” 
—---------------------------------------
Fall
Over fresh ink that’s barely had a chance to dry, you and Mathilde clink glasses in celebration of the very big step you’ve just taken together. The contract had barely been drawn up before she charged into now-your Vesterbro home, opened a bottle of Veuve Clicquot, ready to sign on the dotted line.
A promotion, chef du cuisine, and a bigger percentage in ownership of Kokuore—a piece of your heart—now shared between the woman who helped you create your masterpiece. 
“I can’t believe we’re really fucking doing this!” Mathilde practically squeals, bursting at the seams with excitement as she rests her arms against your kitchen island. The two of you sit side by side on twin bar stools, facing each other to the best of the chair’s swivel-ability. 
“I know. It’s unreal and yet it feels like the right thing, yeah?” you agree, half in shock. Shifting gears, your back to business as you continue with an explanation of the ownership plan that you’ve thought long and hard about. “It’s important to me to stay involved, but most of my focus will go towards the new space for at least the next year. We’ll have weekly check-ins and Mathilde, I want you to at least consider some kind of ownership eventually in the hospitality group should we go in that direction.”
“I forgot you went to business school. It’s very sexy,” she teases, but the prospect of a hospitality group feels even more exciting.  
There’s a feeling of familiarity between you and your friend as you begin to break down some of the nitty gritty details of the contract. With Luca out for a jog, it reminds you of the days when it was just you, her, and Jesper, exploring your shared wildest dreams. The nostalgia wells in your chest as you take another sip from your champagne flute. 
You were really doing this and you’re so lucky you get to do it with your favorite people. 
Well, with your favorite people again. 
Who would’ve thought that moving to Copenhagen would bring you this grand of an adventure?
—---------------------------------------
“Fine,” Luca agrees, knowing that the way he looks at you only stokes the flames you feel for him. He’s got plenty of ideas, spent maybe too much time thinking about breakfast menus and laminated pastry doughs folded with all kinds of experimental ingredients. He hasn’t felt this creative in… well… since he met you. 
“I love the idea of breakfast/brunch. And I’m already feeling really inspired by the prospect of getting to create a menu with you, darling,” Luca begins, ready to build off of your previous idea. “I guess my first question is… who will lead it?” 
He’s not expecting the elated, “You, silly!” that escapes your lips without hesitation. 
It’s not that he has doubts about himself, but you are the one with the business degree. You’re also the one that’s opened a restaurant before, so he'd be more than happy to let you take reins. 
“Not that I’m going to totally love being on opposite schedules but…” you continue, this hypothetical conversation feeling less and less hypothetical. “...maybe I turn Kokuore over to Mathilde… spend a little more time developing this next concept with you. But. Without question, my love, I think you should lead it.” 
It’s his turn to be surprised, your unwavering belief in him felt so deeply it practically takes his breath away. The only response he can get out is: 
“I love you.” 
“I love you,” you giggle in response. 
“I guess my question for you,” you shift cautiously, as it begins to dawn on you that this is something you just might want as much as he does. “...is… is this something you want to do? I mean, I know it’s going to be a really big pivot from fine dining and-.” 
“God yes!” Luca exclaims, relieved at the thought. “I’ve been dying to get away from the fine dining stuff. I-. It’ll be an adjustment, sure. But yes. Yes, it’s what I want.” 
You nod as you process, listening to the conviction in your lover’s voice. 
He wants this. He really wants this.
And he’s so sure. 
You let out a sigh of relief as you realize you don’t have to have to suppress the feeling any longer.
“Fuck it!” you declare, as if you’re inhaling for the first time. “Fuck ‘hypothetical.’ We should totally do this, babe.” 
“Yeah?” “Abso-fucking-lutely.” 
A beat. 
“So…” Luca trails off, the wave of excitement beginning to wash over him. 
“What do we call it?” 
The baritone in his voice catches your attention, and as you look at him, you can practically see it all. In Luca you’ve found your second chapter, your second great love, and now your second restaurant. The word falls out of your mouth as if it were destiny: 
“Seconds. I think… we should call it Seconds.” 
“I love it,” he grins back at you.
And now, you’re just as certain about a second restaurant, because you get to do it with him. Luca chuckles, catching your gaze once more, almost as if he’s about to say ‘I told you so,’ as he utters a cheeky: 
“Well, love. Looks like we gotta call Marcus and let him know he’s about to own 10% of a restaurant.”
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zorrasucia · 4 months ago
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look at how well you take me. even though it's been so long.
for carmy x reader PLEASE
Hello Anon! 💜
Gladly! I wrote this as a loose sequel to this, though it's only relevant in that Reader is Chef Terry's goddaughter and they met back in Copenhagen. I hope you like it! 😊
Carmy burst through the door of your hiding spot, making you jump in shock.
"Fuck!" he cursed. "Sorry, thought this was empty."
He was about to leave without even looking at you and you reached for him.
"Carmy?" you held his wrist.
He finally saw your face. "Oh, my God!" he exclaimed and immediately enveloped you in a tight hug.
You hadn't seen each other in literal years but even so, his hold felt a little too intense and desperate.
"You okay?" you whispered.
"Um, I don't- I don't know," his voice broke and you could hear the tears he was holding back.
"It's okay, Carm," you squeezed him, putting more of your weight into the hug. "I'm right here."
You stayed there, running your fingers soothingly on his shoulders and the nape of his neck.
He sniffled. "You're here," he repeated. After a pause he mumbled: "Why are you here?"
"I came for the funeral," you replied quietly. You thought it would be obvious, given that you were both inside the cloakroom of Aunt Terry's restaurant but Carmy seemed very disoriented. "I couldn't miss it. It's Ever."
"It's Ever," Carmy hummed in agreement. "Uh, I meant what are you doing here in the cloakroom."
"I'm not made for networking," you sighed. "I needed a break. And, well, I don't smoke - so the cloakroom seemed a good idea."
"I'm trying to quit smoking. Maybe you're right and this is a good spot," he said gently.
He took a step back, a little more collected, even if his eyes still looked teary in the halflit room.
You smiled. "It's good to see you, Carm. I thought you were still in New York," you said and it felt a little too formal for the way you were holding each other just seconds ago.
"No, I've been, uh, been in Chicago the last few months... Two years now, shit..." it seemed like he was realizing it just as he was saying it.
"Is it nice? Being home?" you asked, tilting your head, studying his reaction.
"Uh, sure, yeah. I opened a restaurant that might close next week if we don't get a good review but, uh, you know," he said flatly.
You reached for his hand and rubbed his knuckles.
"Is that why you're upset?"
"Huh?" he furrowed his eyebrows.
"Just now? Like I get how it would be upsetting to attend a funeral when your own restaurant might-" you explained your reasoning.
"Oh! No, it's not-" he squeezed his eyes shut. "I, uh, ran into my asshole boss. From New York. He's- He messed me up real bad," he was still avoiding your gaze but he let you cup his face, comforting him. "So I, I confronted him and he, uh, he thinks he did me a favor. Like, shit, I knew he was a fucking psychopath but he doesn't even care. He doesn't-"
His voice broke again and you brought him back into your arms, his face tucked to the side of your neck, tears wetting your skin.
"It's okay. You're okay," you caressed his hair. "I'm right here, Carmy."
He nodded, unable to speak for a while. He squeezed you, his nose buried deep in the crook of your neck, breathing you in.
"Fuck, I've missed you."
"Missed you too," you soothed.
Slowly, his head turned and he started leaving kisses up the side of your neck, to your jaw, the side of your face, the corner of your mouth...
"This okay?" he asked, tracing the same sensual path on the other side of your neck.
"You're not thinking straight, Carm," you hummed, not making any effort to move away from his reach, carding your hands through his hair and bringing him closer instead. "You're angry. And sad."
It was so easy to forget that a few years had passed and this wasn't the Carmy you knew and cared for back in Copenhagen, not anymore.
"I'm tired of fucking thinking," he slurred, running his hands over your sides hungrily. "I want things to go quiet just for a while."
You melted, his hands breaking down whatever small resolve you had.
"Okay," you agreed, dragging him by the neck to press your lips against his.
Carmy gave you desperate kisses as he cornered you against the wall. He cupped your breasts over your dress, humming appreciatively at the low neckline.
"You look so fucking nice," he growled.
His left hand bunched up the side of your dress, trying to caress your leg. You giggled.
"Don't remember you being ticklish" he remarked, cocking his head.
"I'm not," you guided his right hand up your opposite thigh, to the high slit of your dress, giving him plenty of access without bunching up the dress.
"Fuck," Carmy groaned, his calloused hands quickly finding the edge of your lace panties. "Can I -?"
You nodded eagerly, taking his hand and looking at the new tattoos that adorned his skin.
"Please. I need your fingers," you whined.
Carmy didn't make you wait, pushing your underwear down your legs, caressing your pussy, already wet for him. He kissed your collarbone and the tops of your breasts while tracing lines between your folds, a low squelching sound coming from underneath your dress as he inserted two digits at once.
"Shit."
"My clit," you begged, angling your hips so his thumb pressed the exact spot.
He started moving, a quick and unforgiving rhythm making you melt in his arms, rolling your hips and moaning, holding tight to his shoulders to stand upright.
"Close?" he rasped.
"So fucking close."
"Will you let me fuck you against the wall after you cum?" he asked low.
It was like he flipped a switch and suddenly your pussy was fluttering around his fingers. He covered your mouth with his free hand, muffling your cries of pleasure.
"Fuck, Carmy," you panted, holding the wall for support while he unbuckled his belt.
"Shit," he stopped in his tracks and started going through the coats and jackets that were hanging on the opposite wall.
"Carm? What are you doing?"
"Just a sec," he mumbled. Once he found an informal leather jacket, he started going through its many pockets. "Come on, Richie," he whispered, then smiled in triumph as he took out a condom from the inside pocket.
"Should I ask?" you grinned, entertained watching Carmy unbutton his trousers, pump himself and roll the condom on.
"Better not," he stood in front of you, one of your arms rounded his shoulders, your free hand held his cock.
"You've always been a handful," you said - the flirtatious play on words taking you back years ago, to Copenhagen, and the first time he fucked you.
"Hmm," he closed his eyes in pleasure, completely at your mercy as you lined him up to your pussy.
He pushed lightly, an inch, then another. You whined at the stretch. "You okay?"
"It's good, so good," you managed, holding on to his shoulders, "just go slow."
Carmy nodded, the gentle movement of his hips like the swaying boat where you so often had shared a bed. You were letting out needy sounds and muffling them into your hand, as he got deeper and deeper. You encouraged him, bringing him closer by squeezing his ass, scratching at his pale skin until he was buried inside you to the hilt.
"Carm..."
He stayed still for a moment, kissing you tenderly.
"Need this," he mumbled against your lips. "Need you."
"Yeah?" you teased, circling your hips, making him moan. "How much?"
"A lot," he said, hips moving backwards slowly, his cock almost all the way out. Then, he drove back into you, quick, hard. You bit your lip to silence a high pitched moan. "A lot - a lot."
He grabbed your thighs, pressing you against the wall, lifting you.
"Fast and hard?" you suggested. You usually liked to take your time but fucking inside a closet - albeit a fancy one - asked for practicality and speed. And Carmy needed to blow off some steam.
He nodded, speechless as he started building a quick pace, driving into you like his life depended on it. You held him close, resorting to bite on the shoulder pad of his suit jacket to stay quiet.
"Wait," Carmy moved slightly, enough to press his forehead to yours and look down, hypnotized by the way his cock disappeared inside your pussy. Carmy's eyes widened, pupils blown and mouth half open. "Look at how well you take me. Even though it's been so long," he mumbled and you knew deep inside that it wasn't a line. He was truly dazed and euphoric that this was happening.
"Carm," you pleaded. "Let go for me, baby. I know you need it."
He squeezed his eyes shut. "Mhmm," he agreed, panting. "'m close."
You squeezed your pussy around his cock, watching with satisfaction as that simple effort made him lose control, rutting messily, soft grunts leaving his lips as he came hard.
"Shit," he cursed, his lips on the side of your face.
You exhaled, content, as he let you down, landing on one foot then the other. Your heels were on the floor, somewhere, lost while your legs shook around Carmy's waist. "Better? Stopped thinking for a bit?" you inquired a little cockily.
"Not sure where we are right now, to be honest," he drawled.
"Good."
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richarlotte · 21 days ago
Note
What do you think makes your friends so magnetic?
It’s because they’re genuinely interesting, funny, well-rounded women. They’re not just people who you want to get to know better; they’re people you look up to and want to be. They’re put together, qualified, educated, and great to be around. They all have goals, they’re all motivated, and they’ve all had experiences that they’ve allowed to shape them for better or worse. They’re all confident in who they are, and they all have passion projects and interests that they’ve spent hours pouring themselves into.
Twilly has her travel blog, her zine, her poetry, her cooking, and her fascination with other cultures and ways of life. She’s rarely afraid of taking action or doing something new, and I’m proud to call her my bravest friend. She leaps at the chance to do new things, goes to parts unknown, and vibrancy and creativity are her life’s goals. She’s an amazing person to get to know.
Camilla speaks seven languages (not including English), has walked at Copenhagen Fashion Week, and is amazing with people. She’s always talking about interning for Condé Nast, how she’d style people, what she’s experienced, and how she’s honed her eye for aesthetics and design. I honestly believe that Camilla has the potential to become one of the best fashion editors and artistic directors of our generation.
Those are just two examples, but having a clear image of the sort of woman you’d like to be one day and doing what it takes to build your confidence and your personality, finding what makes life feel better for you (having passions and hobbies), and learning how to convey your emotions and converse with people are some of the steps you need to take. People are drawn to people who they are genuinely interested in; that’s always been the case and always will be. Part of making yourself interesting is being someone people want to hear more from, being able to speak about yourself without coming off as pompous, actively trying to engage with the world around you, and building quality relationships with more people.
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floweringlino · 2 months ago
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Macarons and kisses | L.F
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𝙎𝙮𝙣𝙤𝙥𝙨𝙞𝙨 ; in which wherever she goes, he goes and the other way around.
𝙋𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜 ; pastry chef!Felix x Pastrychef!fem!reader
𝙉𝙤𝙩𝙚𝙨 ; fluff, tinie tiny bit angst, mentions of food, bullying by boss, crying, mention of alcohol, slightly suggestive near the end.
𝙒𝙤𝙧𝙙 𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩 ; 2.3k
The gods menu masterlist
✎ ❀
“Y/N, how is the mise en place for tonight looking?” Her friend questioned her.
“Don’t you worry about me, Lix. Worry about that Gumbo thats burning on the stove.
He hurried away to continue his family meal for the rest of their colleagues, Stirring the stew.
Three years of culinary school, two years of training with the best pastry chefs that were around the world. Paris, Copenhagen and Brussels were the places she had trained and all of them took a lot from her. It was hard but it made her who she was and it got her to where she was today.
She knew what she was doing, maybe she was rhetorical best around. The only person that could challenge her in her ability's was Felix. The two of them had gone through a lot in the past, from starting school together to the job they were today. Y/n had followed Felix to the two star michelin restaurant they worked at the present day.
She liked her colleagues. Felix and her had made the pastry their own and powered through the short and difficult days. Hyunjin had also become a good friend of hers and that made her rough days there better.
There was only reason why the days were so bad to start with. Her only problem with this team was the chef. Never in her short but eventful carrier, she had even met a man like him. A man so pathetic, so mean and so heartless. He made her days horrible until the point she cried her way home. But that was the job she thought.
Not every experience is supposed to be a good one.
"Corner." She told her colleagues before making her way across the corner. She said a couple of behinds while passing her friends and made her way to the kitchenaid that was whisking the eggwhites.
Very slowly she poured the sugar water while the whisk was doing its thing. As the mixture started taking the texture that she needed a confident smile appeared on het lips.
"Y/L/N, you better not mess up those macarons, I might actually kill you."
And with that the smile fell again.
"Little does he know you never mess up your macarons." Felix bumped her shoulder a little bit to make her smile again.
"I don't do mess ups. Especially not here.”
"Everybody makes mistakes babes." He reminded her.
"Calm down Hannah Montana. I wanna live out this job before he kills me." She looked up at her best friend while still doing her work. So familiar with the recipe she didn't even need to look.
Felix was also already looking at her. It made her giggle so he felt like he accomplished his mission. The look he gave her was one of pure admiration. They both did the same thing but she did it with so much passion.
"Stop looking at me." She blushed and looked away, hoping he hadn't seen it. But someone had.
"Im sorry. Ill stop. Finish those and help me with family meal?" She nodded in response and watched him walk away to the stove where he had a stew cooking for dinner.
After a little while she left her macarons to rest for a little bit as the shiny layer needed to turn matte before pushing them into the oven. Leaving them alone she made her way over to her Friend.
"What can I help you with, Lix?" He turned around from his conversation with Hyunjin and stood next to her over the stew.
"Can you cut the okra, chorizo and the green onion? I want to add it last so that it stays crunchy at the end." She nodded in response and made a station next to Hyunjin. As she did the stuff Felix had asked her to do, Hyunjin poked her in her side to get her attention from her. To keep him annoyed a little bit she waiting with responding until he yelled.
"Yah! I wanna talk to you. Talk to meee! Im bored."
"Whats up Jinnie. How are we feeling?"
"Keep this a secret okay?" She nodded in response as a promise to keep his secret.
"Im kind of thinking of quitting." She was shocked, thinking she was the only one with a problem with Chef.
"And why would you? I respect your decision, obviously. Honestly same. But im confused. I thought you liked it here?"
"I do like it here. But something doesn't feel right. I don't know how to explain it to you."
✎ ❀
It was 12.00 at night when y/n was called into chefs office. Dinner service had just ended and the kitchen staff was done cleaning. Making their was over to the dressing rooms he picked her from the crowd. And the guys could follow the entire conversation through the walls.
"Y/n I called you here because there are some things in your behaviour that are just unacceptable and you need to change some things."
"Im sorry sir, what exactly are you talking about?"
Im talking about the fact that you are here to work. Not flirt with your colleagues." He said it with such a stern look on his fave that she had no idea if he was kidding or not.
"Im sorry?"
"Y/n, im gonna get straight to the point. So far you have disappointed me in your abilities and have shown me nothing that you can be proud of. We, the guys and me feel like you spend more time flirting with Felix than actually doing your job, and today I also saw you with Hyunjin. Leave the boys alone or im going to have to fire you."
"Sir im gonna tell you something and you might not like it, but this company that you try to run? It sucks. You're not gonna have to fire me because I quit affective immediately. You can keep my last paycheque and shove it up a place where the sun doesn't shine. I hope you lose your staff and those stupid stars you worked so hard for."
"Leave my office now."
"Already leaving. And if I were you, I'd start working on the rat problem you have. It would be a shame if someone saw one and made an anonymous complaint with the health department."
She slammed the door closed behind her, rushed her way past her colleagues with her hand in the air as in a motion for them to not touch her and when Felix tried to grab her hand she shook it away. Not wanting anything to do with him at this moment.
It took all of them a moment to realise what just actually happened and as soon as it was processed, Felix stepped into the office, Hyunjin following him closely.
Not a single tear was waisted on that pathetic excuse of a leader on her drive home. She couldn't help but laugh a little bit mixed with the anger she had let out. It had been building up for a while and now that it was all let out she felt sooo much better.
She didn't even worry about her job, she could easily get another one. Another thought crossed her minds but quickly pushed it away.
Sitting down on her couch she let herself sink in and enjoy the weight that had dropped off her shoulders.
Walking to her kitchen she grabbed a bottle of wine and poured herself a glass. After that she changed into her pyjamas and sat back down on the comfortabel couch, not planning to get up again.
What would she do. There were about twelve job offers she could consider but was that really what she wanted. Was this where she wanted to take her talent. Her mind wondered to a new place, her place. She had an investor that would be interested in her doing this so realistically it would work. But what that something she was ready for.
A knock on her door interrupted her thought. She groaned out of frustration not wanting to get off of the couch. She waited 10 seconds before opening her front door.
Standing in front of her in all of his glory was Felix. His now long blond hair was a bit wet from the light rain outside. He only smiled at her, opening his arms for a hug which she gladly accepted.
She found comfort in his arms and it eased her mind. His hand held she back of her neck closer to him and they just stood there for a minute before letting go and coming back inside. Without talking they sat down on the couch. She sat between his legs and halfway layed on his chest.
"What happened after I left?" She questioned, taking his hand in hers and playing with his fingers.
A chuckle left his mouth.
"We quit, Hyunjin and I. We talked about it before but this was the last push we needed."
"Lix! Why did you quit? You kinda need a job." She couldn't help but laugh a little bit at what he said.
"And you should know better. Where you go. I go. I moved to Denmark with you remember?. We'll have to tell our next job that we're a package deal." He winked at her when she looked up at and stared at his eyes.
"Lix, what if we didn't search for a new job?" She questioned him, sitting back up and turning to face him a little bit more. His face read confusion.
"What do you mean, love?"
"What if, we finally called back those investors and opened our own place?" Her eyes held hope. Hoping he would say yes. They had talked about it before, but now it was serious. She ment it this time.
She tried to read his face but there were so many emotions to notice. God, she hoped he would say yes. She didn't really know what else to do. Finally when his mouth turned into a smile he responded.
"Let's do this." He grinned at her and she threw her arms tightly around his neck.
"You sure?" She needed to ask him, maybe he felt like he was pressured.
"I thought about it, and I think we can do this. It may even be the next step for us." He gleamed at the idea now. It would be their place instead of only hers, where he would work. Both of them would be owners.
"Let's look at our old Pinterest boards!" She exclaimed excitedly, dragging her laptop to her lap, laying back against Felix his chest. He pushed her back for a second to stand up. He missed her warmth immediately but if she was gonna drink wine, so was he. Grabbing himself a glass and taking the rest of the full bottle with him he sat back on the back and let her rest against him again.
This time she pulled a blanket across their laps and comfortably sat on the couch, just talking through their ideas.
Pastry's, cookies, pie's, cakes, chocolates
Felix would do the chocolates because Y/N hated temping the mass. Absolutely hated it. She made Felix do it on her final assignment and she finished it with an 8. But it was fine cuz he made her make his Sabayon.
It now was 4 in the morning and Y/N was talking through the paint options, Felix was too distracted to listen to her talking. His eyes watched her lips move and he did hear her voice. But all he could think about was how beautiful she looked. So passionate she glowed with love.
He wanted to kiss her but her back was still resting on his chest. And the fact she was just his best friend. They had finished the wine long ago and he definitely wasn't drunk. He knew what he wanted, had wanted since they first met.
His point finger traced her jawline and cheek and she pressed into his touch, wanting more. His stare at her was intense as he traced his finger across her bottom lip. Against his chest he felt her heart skip a beat. Scared he had gone to far he pulled his hand away but was stopped when it was dragged back.
Fuck it he was gonna do this. His hand pulled her chin in his direction, turning her face his way. When their eyes looked it was pure love they both say, and without thinking he grabbed the back of her neck and her jaw and pressed his lips to her.
She didn't even need to think and eased into the loving kiss. She had wanted this for so long but was scared of what it would do to their friendship.
The kiss was intense but long awaited. In the kiss she turned around so she could sit in his lap the other way around now wrapping her legs around his waist and her arms wrapped around his neck pulling him even closer.
His hands slid to her back, underneath her pyjame. A soft moan from her, made him insert his tongue into her mouth, making the  kiss even deeper than it already was.
"God you're so beautiful." He whispered against her lips and he felt her smile against his.
"I can do this all day." He said again continuing the make-out in the couch. She fully sat on his lap, softly grinding against him, making him groan from the friction of the jeans against him.
"Then do me all day." She grinned and with that he lifted her from the couch, guiding hee to her own bedroom, where the night didn't end till the sun began to rise again
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tangerinesilk · 2 years ago
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BACK UP PLAN • TANGERINE x FEM!READER
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they think you’re the diesel, but you know who took the case. too bad for you that tangerine, a guy from your past, likes to shoot first and ask questions later. as fun as that is, you quickly team up to figure out who took the case and what terrible fate they’ll meet... and of course, rehash your complicated past.
rating ✷ r (18+ only, minors dni!)
tropes ✷ enemies to lovers (but still enemies), pwp, cheeky banter, loud gf/quiet bf, butchered british slang, kind of mr. and mrs. smith energy, two idiots with one task
warnings ✷ cursing, violence being the answer, guns & knives, switch!tan x switch!reader, bathroom sex, fingering, quick p in v, lots of begging, exhibitionism, mention of hands/rings (my kink lmao)
word count ✷ 3.7k
a/n ✷ my first tangerine fic :D just feeding into my fixation and going down the aaron johnson rabbit hole again. wasn't expecting to do some bullet train writing, but..... here it is. there will be no part 2! hope y'all like it and feedback is always welcomed!
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Shit was going down and surprisingly, it was not by your doing.
With your back pressed against the wall of the luggage holding, you could only hope the short but thick curtain covered your figure enough that anyone who passed wouldn’t see you. As you attempt to keep your breathing low and quiet, it hitches when you hear the sudden sound of automatic door opening.
“We need to find the cheeky fucker who took our case. Swear to God, I’ll bash his head in when I find him.”
That’s a thick accent you don’t forget. You don’t want to peak, but you can see the West Ham sticker on the back of his phone. 
It can’t be him. No, no…
“Lemon, I’ve gone up and down this train for the umpteenth time. I’m ‘bout ready to shoot any sleazy bellend who looks at me funny.”
Tangerine?
He was the only person you’ve been able to outrun yet here he was, only a few inches away and knowing damn well he would know how to tear into you for what happened in Copenhagen. Long story short, it ended with you tossing his favorite gun into the river and it’s made an even bigger target on your back.
While you do wear a mask that seals your identity during your heists, you prayed he didn’t remember eyes since you lost your only form of disguise when fighting the Prince. Just like you, she uses her looks to her gains, able to manipulate anyone by batting her eyelashes. She was the one with the case, and knowing her past, she’d blame it on someone else and you were most likely high up on the list.
“Alright, then. Let’s keep lookin’ for the bastard.” He said before hanging up.
You cover your mouth, your glare remaining steady on him before he takes a pause. His blue eyes search around the cart, huffing until you hear the other automatic door open. You fully step out of the small luggage spot and catching your breath, “I have to get off here.”
As the next stop was coming to a halt, a force pulled you back into the bathroom from an arm snaking around your waist. You couldn’t even gather your thoughts before feeling a cool metal pressing against your temple.
“Now I can only think of two reasons a girl like yourself is hiding behind a bunch of suitcases. One, she’s got a bit of a dickhead of a boyfriend or two, she’s got my fuckin’ case.”
You smirked, “If I had it, I would have hid better, don’t you think?” You hoped to fool him.
“Oh, darling. You think I’m that stupid, why don’t you just–” He turned you around to look into your eyes, and unfortunately, he had seen them somewhere, “Oi, where have I seen you before?”
“I’ve never met you before in my life, now if you’ll excuse me…” You trailed before he shifted to stand in front of the doorway, placing his gun on the sink counter.
“As much as I’d like to believe that, darling... you’re not going’ anywhere until I get my answer.” He said with an assertive tone, his jaw obviously clenched and his eyes piercing blue.
With his one hand on the trim of the sink and the other against the wall, he towered over you with his tall stance. He acted intimidating but you knew deep down there was hidden softness to his personality. ‘Warmer the closer you got’ type of shit.
Your eyes shifted from his eyes to his chest, hard to not stare with his first button undone and gold chain disappearing into his shirt. Able to display a poker face, Tangerine was still racking his brain around where he had seen those eyes before. He couldn’t place the last time he saw such a color.
I guess what you failed to mention is that something else happened in Copenhagen. To summarize, it involved a skin tight dress, a hotel key card and a getaway plan by dawn. What threw him off now was that you weren’t sporting the same short, auburn wig you sported that night you tried to get his attention.
“How am I supposed to give you an answer that I don’t have? You’re in my way.” You protest.
“And you’re not a very good liar, are ya?” He huffed, “Now, if you don’t have my case then who does?”
Not giving a second more, you pulled out your own gun tucked in the waist of your skirt, pushing it against his bare chest, “I think you better stay out of the way before you really get hurt.”
He didn’t bat an eye, but his eyes took a second glance at the tattoos drawn on the side of your middle finger and the top of your knuckles. Suddenly, he placed those hands from memory and the image of them running down his chest struck his mind. He looked back into your eyes and remembered how they kept steady contact as your tongue glided down his body.
“It’s been a while since Copenhagen, yeah?” He said, clenching his jaw once more.
Shit. Maybe you shouldn’t have doubted him so much.
“Well you’re not fooling me this time.” He grunted, quickly taking your gun while your guard was down for a split second, “I’ll give you one last chance, love. Tell me where the case is and maybe, I’ll be and gentleman and just escort you off at the next stop.”
“So cute how you’re trying to threaten me yet use a pet name. Guess I just know how to get to your soft spot, Tan.” You grinned, placing your hand on his cheek.
Mesmerized, a gloss smooths over his eyes before his phone vibrates in his pants pocket.
“Do you wanna get that or have me reach in there?” You taunted.
He replied with an eye roll, but quickly answered. “Yeah, what?” Tangerine answered, his eyebrow cocked.
A low voice told him that they needed to see proof of the case at the next stop or things could go south. Tangerine quickly hangs up during mid-threat, and you twist your lips.
“Since you can’t find your case, I assume you’re the one getting off at the next station.” You smirked, “Glad we got to catch up.”
“No, no, you little pain in my ass. You’re gonna put on a nice smile for these massive dickheads and stall with me…” He tilted his head a bit, “As far as I know, you know where the case is so I’ll be attached by the hip to you for the rest of the lovely ride to Kyoto.” Tangerine yammered on.
You rolled your eyes but he held your chin, making you look him in the eyes, “I’m sorry, does that bother you now?”
“Hmm, no. Just kind of sweet to know you haven’t forgotten about me.” You purposefully teased, your palm running down his chest before opening another button of his shirt with your one hand. It was a tactic to get under his skin, hoping to get some sort of reaction.
“You’re some tease who left me in Copenhagen, I’ve dealt with shots to the fuckin’ chest. You really think highly of yourself, don't ya.” He deflects but glances at your soft lips. 
You grinned, placing your hand on his cheek, “I don’t think I have to remind you of how low I’ll stoop to get a job done… or kneel.”
Tangerine felt your hand moving through the back of his hair, carding his loose curls before pressing your foreheads together. The tip of your nose brushed against his, your lips barely touching until the train came to a slow stop.
“Well, I guess it’s time to put on a good fucking act.” You huffed, pulling away and Tangerine didn’t realize he forgot to take a breath.
♡ ♡ ♡
He turned around, opening the bathroom door in one swift motion and the two of you stood by the exit. After quickly texting Lemon that he was going to stall, he gives you a look again– this time, his eyes shifting up and down your body, noticing the tear in your stockings. He knew you were up to something, but resisting the urge to press you up against a wall was making him ache a bit.
As the train door opened, Tangerine took a step toward you, “If anything goes down, you get behind me and get back on. Other than that, follow my lead.”
You nodded, “I have limited options… how generous of you.”
The two of you step off the train, and looking around for the men you’re asked to meet. As passengers got on and off, there was a small group that came your way and you stood next to Tangerine as they got closer.
“Where’s the case?” The tall one asked, standing center of the three other men.
“Lemon is keeping it safe right now.”
“Then who’s this?” 
Tangerine glanced at you, shrugging, “I’m a professional, I’ve got my back up… Peach.”
You wanted to narrow your eyes at him with a burning stare, but you maintained your composure to convince them. It was one step closer to getting the case, and it wasn’t the worse operative name.
The four men chuckle at it, and you cross your arms from the reaction, “So, are we done here?” You asked, “We’ve obviously got places to be now since your boss is up our asses about his case.” 
At first, they replied with scowls until Tangerine took a step in front of you, your chest basically touching his back.
“‘Cuse her attitude, it’s been a long night.” Tangerine acted as if he were in charge of you, “But, we’re all good now. The plan is still Kyoto, ta-ra now.” He faked a grin, pushing you toward the door as the alert sounded for boarding.
Before you knew it, the train was moving and the both of you plopped into two empty seats in the quiet car. As you watched Tangerine type out a text to Lemon, you scoffed, crossing your arms as you faced the window out to the city life of Japan.
♡ ♡ ♡
“Well, Lemon still hasn’t found the person with the case… fucker could have gotten off without us knowing.” 
You turned your head, “So, that’s means I’m off the list of the accused?”
“...I just don’t trust you.” He trailed, slipping his phone back into his pants pocket.
“Aw, still a little hurt from our last encounter?” You pouted, “Didn’t take you for such a softie, Tan.”
Tangerine clenched his jaw. He had little patience for your sass, but it was fun to fuck with him. You gently placed your hand on the top of his thigh, hidden under the table, and refused to lose eye contact with him. There were four stops left so, it was time to put a spontaneous plan B into motion: make him let his guard down for you.
You batted your eyelashes, “Tell me, do you still think about our night together? I didn’t mean to leave so quickly, but we had something… yeah?” You taunted him, your hand moving up his thigh. Just as your fingers were going to unbutton his pants, Tangerine quickly grabbed your wrist and put it back on his knee.
“You wanna play games, darling?” He grunted, “Then, I’ll play your game.”
You couldn’t help but admit that your heart beat against your chest, like the air in the cart had been sucked away and before you knew it, his right hand was running up your thigh until he ripped the rest of your stocking. You almost gasped, not wanting to attract attention, but he pulled it enough where your panties were exposed.
“Don’t get shy on me now, love.” Tangerine said under his breath as his hand entering between your legs. Once he pushed the black lace to the side, his two thick fingers entered your slit. The hand you had on his thigh suddenly met the wrist of his hand working your pussy.
His blue eyes softened, feeling how wet you already were and how you tried to restrain from arching your back against the seat. Being in plain light, you bit your bottom lip and concentrated on the scene passing by– obviously, not easy to focus on when Tangerine is gliding his fingers in and out of your wet slit. You could scream, knowing how deep they were from feeling his cool rings against your skin.
“I’d rub your clit, but I’d hate to make you cum right here… in front of everyone.” He looked around, as if he weren’t edging you, “You don’t really deserve to anyways.”
You took one big gulp, your hand gripping the arm rest now and you let him keep going. For as long as he wanted to and however fast he wanted to. As big of a talk you made, you were suddenly puddy in his hands– quite literally– and God, you didn’t want him to stop.
He pressed his lips against your ear, “Are you close?”
“Hmm.” You could barely let out a word, “N-no.”
“Don’t lie to me now so you can cum.” He chuckled.
Just like that, he quickly pulled his hand away and he saw how his fingers were coated in your glistening cum. As he went to place them in his mouth, you pulled his wrist and tasted your own cum on your tongue. 
All he could think was, “Fuck, her tongue is soft…” and reminisce the memory of his dick pushing down your throat.
You kissed his fingers before setting his hand back on his lap, and he watched you pant. Such a beautiful mess, he thought again.
Pushing your skirt back down, you crossed your legs as you ran your fingers through your hair. “You fucking ripped my nice tights…” You huffed, pulling the band from the waist and pulling them down your legs. You balled them up as you put your shoes back on, and stuffed them between the wall of the train and the seat.
You blew a breath past your lips, “Alright, that was fun but I gotta go.” You gulped, attempting to get up but he pushed your leg back down so you basically say back down.
“You’re stayin’ right here.” He said, not looking at you but around the cart, “Because the next stop, you’re gettin’ off… not like how you did right now but-”
You cut him off, “What?” You scoffed, your cheeks feeling heated, “No, I’m not getting off this train until I have the case!”
You didn’t mean to spill your own secret, but your guard had been put down. Shit.
He smirked, “See, I knew you had somethin’ to do with the case. Now you’re definitely gettin’ off at the next stop or I’ll-”
Cut off again, he sees Lemon walking down, also without the case in hand, and Tangerine quickly gets up. He met him halfway in the aisle, so you got up to see what was going on and if it was about the case.
“Who’s this? Looks familiar…” Lemon trailed as he pointed at you, then back at Tangerine.
“She’s no one-”
“Actually we passed each other in Copenhagen. You called me an Emily.” You grinned, tilting your head.
“Ah, yes. Emily, very kind but a tad bossy…” Lemon nodded but then narrowed his eyes, “Lookin’ for the case too, yeah?... unless you have it and we’re runnin’ around like headless chickens.” You could see his hand reaching into his jacket.
“I wish. Trust me…” You crossed your arms.
“Yeah, and she was just leaving on the next stop. No business being around here, muckin’ about.” Tangerine said without looking at you again, just making eye contact with Lemon.
“You treat me like I’m incompetent yet I beat both your asses back in Copenhagen and managed to steal the getaway car. Why don’t you two leave and let me handle whoever has the case.” You shoved past Tangerine, “Fucking amateurs.” You muttered under your breath.
Lemon turned around, Tangerine behind him, “She’s definitely is an Emily.”
Tangerine rolled his eyes, “I’ll go get take care of her. You check back down that way.” He clenched his jaw, pushing back his rolled sleeves.
♡ ♡ ♡
The door opened to the first class cart, already imagining your hands wrapped around the Prince’s neck once you had an eye on her. Dim orange lights lit your way, a few people asleep with blankets on top of them. 
Just as you came close to the lounge toward the end, a hand gripped your wrist. Before asking any questions, your other hand quickly swung down on the other’s wrist, thinking it was the Prince, but you were met with another set of bright eyes.
“Let go of me.” You muttered under your breath, not trying to get anyone’s attention.
Like deja vu, Tangerine pulled you into the bathroom and locked the door. It wasn’t as tight as the other passenger bathroom, but still had little room to move around with two people.
“Do I gotta tell you again?” Tan practically growled.
“You can’t tell me what to do. What do you want from me that you keep cornering me like this?” Your tone matched his.
He took a deep breath through his nostrils, and suddenly felt the tension. He couldn’t take his eyes from you, never admitting that he had been thinning about you since Copenhagen, so instead his lips met yours.
You weren’t surprised, but you missed his lips. You bit his bottom lip, your body relaxing as you fell into his arms. Your noses brushed together, foreheads close before you unbuttoned his shirt, your hands meeting his soft skin. It slipped past his toned arms, and he pressed your hips against the sink counter.
As you lifted your leg by his side, he put his hand underneath your knee to keep it high. Tangerine kissed and nipped at your neck after taking your shirt off, tossing it on top of the closed toilet seat. You ran your fingers through his messy curls, gripping them as you shared hungry kisses. His hard pressed against his slacks, rubbing against your inner thigh.
“You’ve got about four minutes, Tan.” You said between kisses, “I don’t know if you’re that fast.”
“You underestimate me, love.” He grunted, “It’s gettin’ a bit old.”
Suddenly, he hiked your skirt and you played along, spreading your legs enough for his body to move between them. He quickly unzipped his pants while his right hand rubbed your wet clit and the left hand against your neck. 
You giggled, biting your bottom lip before slipping the tip of his cock into your pussy. You held back your gasp, giggling instead to get a rise out of him, but it just made him squeeze your neck a bit.
“Almost forgot how big you were.” You pouted, but he thrusted inside of you. You audibly gasped, and kissed his thumb pressed against your bottom lip.
At first he was slow-paced, purposefully making you beg for it. He knew your weak spots yet his head fell against your shoulder, a light whimper escaping his throat remembering how tight your cunt was. He held your leg up again, giving him an angle to work with and his cock bottomed out inside your pussy.
“Fuck!” You croaked, “God, you’re so… big. Stretching me out so good, baby.” You whined.
“Fuckin’ Christ.” Tan cursed, his hips bucking as your skins slapped together. He was eager to make you cum, shattering in his arms and falling apart like he adored. His hand slapped against your ass cheek, kneading it the closer he got. 
You leaned your head back, rolling your eyes back and could see stars, Tangerine practically lifting you off your feet as your walls began to tighten around his hard cock.
“Please… please let me cum.” You begged, your eyes barely open, “I wanna cum. Please.”
“Gotta beg a little more, darling.” He gulped as his pace got faster, not realizing how strong he was, “Keep those pretty eyes lookin’ at me.”
You arched your back, “Ah, please!… I want your fucking cum filling me up. Make me cum all over your cock, baby.” Your pitch elevated, “Fuck, I’m gonna cum. I’m gonna fucking cum!”
He grunted against your shoulder, giving it a small bite before saying, “Cum, cum for me, love.” He lighty gasped but tried to mask it by kissing your shoulder.
Your fingers pulled his messy curls, not able to explain the complete bliss running throughout every vein and nerve in your body. His hand covered your mouth just as yours covered his, muffing your defeated moans when the two of your released inside your pussy.
As you came down from your highs, the two of you let out tired chuckles. His cock was still inside you, feeling your warm walls as he shared one last sloppy kiss. 
Your thumb ran across his cheek, “Better than Copenhagen?”
He half-smiled, “Wouldn’t you like to know.”
♡ ♡ ♡
Ultimately, you agreed to let them take it from there. It was two more stops, and the train was coming to it’s next destination. You and Tangerine stood by the door, watching it slowly open and your stubbornness was eating you up. Although it was a risk to get off the train, seemed there was more than the two of you looking for the case. If anything, you loss some pay.
“You better get off now.” Tangerine told you, the two of you watching people pass.
You hummed, “I know… hope you can tell me how it goes if we ever meet again.” You sighed, placing your hands on his chest. Your eyes met with his, and he furrowed his brows. You twisted your hips, taking a deep breath before quickly meeting your lips with his again. Tender and slow.
 As you pulled your face from his, you nodded, “Bye, Tangerine.”
He expected for you to pass, and he actually thought he was going to miss you.
Instead, you forcefully pushed him out the door and it closed him out from coming back in. You rolled your eyes, walking up to the window as you watched the train pull from the station.
“I really am good.” You smirked.
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noellawrites · 1 year ago
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Souvenir - Yandere!Luca x reader
summary: Luca just can't let his rivalry with Carmy go, so he leaves a permanent reminder inside of you. afab reader but no specified pronouns.
warnings: smut, baby-trapping, condom sabotage, forced breeding
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You weren't even supposed to go to Copenhagen. The trip was booked for Marcus when his mother took a turn for the worse. So here you were, the recipient of a non-refundable flight, standing in front of Denmark's most renowned kitchen. As The Beef's only waitress, saying you had a lack of food prep knowledge was an understatement. But with Tina and Ebra back in school, the task was left to you.
"Carmy taught me everything I know about good service. Really, I owe everything to him. I thought he'd boot me after taking over The Beef but thank god he didn't," you rambled.
"Sounds like he means a lot to you," Luca spoke quietly as he prepped an example dessert.
"He's the best chef I've ever worked with. Maybe not as intense as your rival chef, but he definitely challenges me. For example, sending me here with no experience," you laughed, picking up a tub of diced almonds.
"Seems like a real bond," Luca said simply. He reached across to the other side of you and his tattoos crossed into your line of vision.
"He's like my mentor, brother, work husband and hero all in one. Actually, that sounds stupid when I say it out loud," you laughed nervously.
"I know what you mean. To be so consumed by someone's talent that you just want to seep into their skin," Luca agreed.
A comfortable moment of silence hung between you both as you kept working. Out of the corner of your eye, you could see him staring at you with an unreadable expression before he turned away to grab some dough.
"Your lips taste better than any dessert," Luca whispered in your ear as he traced his fingers down your stomach. Pleasure tickled down your spine and he pushed down your shorts, reaching into your panties and tracing your clit.
"Ah--ahh, Luca!" you moaned, and he clamped a hand over your mouth.
Through the dark, you could just make out his pepper tattoo on his hand, which oddly enough reminded you of Carmy. Come to think of it, the patchy placements of his tattoos reminded you a lot of Carmy's. And his entire apartment was bare just like Carmy's was, too. Even Luca's intense expressions sometimes mirrored Carmy's.
I really shouldn't be thinking of Carmy when I'm about to have sex with this hot pastry chef, you thought.
As Luca started pulling his boxers down, you held your hand out to stop him.
"Do you have a condom?" you asked, sitting up and looking around.
"Dresser, top drawer," he said, sounding a bit irked. You handed him the small plastic square and laid back down.
You could hear him ripping open the package with his teeth and stretching the condom over his cock when he suddenly pulled your panties down the rest of the way.
You were lost in pleasure as he dove into your pussy, licking and sucking with his expertly trained tongue.
Luca held you against him with his strong arms as you both reached orgasm together, a mess of sweat and pleasure and moans.
"Oh shit Luca, did you just cum in me?" you gasped, wriggling away from him as post-sex clarity struck you.
"The condom must've broken," he said, but you pulled away from him too quick and managed to see what he was trying to hide: the empty, fully intact condom next to him. His hard cock pulled out of you, covered in a mix of your cum, no condom on him at all.
"What the fuck, Luca?!"
"Stay here. With me."
Luca's kind eyes had turned dark, an ulterior motive lurking underneath the surface. You didn't know what he was up to, but you knew it couldn't be good.
You quickly gathered your clothes from the floor and tried to yank your pants on. Luca stood, still completely naked, and moved to stand in front of the door leading outside his flat.
"Move, I need to go pick up Plan B. I'm ovulating, you fucking asshole!"
"You're not leaving. Not until your flight."
"Oh my god, this is so fucked up! I-I barely even know you!" you cried.
"You knew me enough to let me fuck you," he laughed, pulling on his boxers. As much as you hated to admit it, he had stretched you better than anyone else had before.
"I hate you, Luca."
You took a Plan B when you got back to Chicago, but by then it was too late. Not only did you bring back three desserts for The Bear's new menu, but you also brought back a tiny baby in your stomach. A little bundle of cells forever tying you to the British pastry chef. You sobbed as you told Carmy, who then gave you the entire story about how he and Luca had met. Rivals, but Carmy was clearly more skilled, more talented, more ambitious.
But now, Luca had finally bested Carmy at something. He left you a permanent reminder, a souvenir from your travels, a big 'fuck you' to his former rival chef.
part two
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words-4u · 2 years ago
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right person (2/3)
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pairing: luca x reader
wc: 3.3k
a/n: part two is hereee! i took the conversation that marcus and luca had while chopping/folding dough and revamped it for this fic <3 hope yall like it
warnings: 18+ SMUT, swearing
part 1 / part 3
as it turns out making shiso gelee wasn't as complicated as it sounds but it also helped massively that chef luca is always near to correct any mistakes.
the kitchen is silent besides the sounds of pots and smacking of dough from marcus' station.
luca is drying some tupperware at the table behind you while you whisk some liquid gelatin.
"that's a little bit too thick," he says peering over. "so just add some more pineapple juice."
you caught a whiff of his aftershave which made you want to lose your mind. "yes, chef."
doing as he instructed, you add more juice. "just to know for the future, can i ask why?"
he glances at you before going back to his task at hand. "uh, the thicker it is, the stronger it is. so too thick and it overpowers the other components."
"good to know... and what do you serve this with exactly?"
"uh, we do that with a thin slice of marzipan and a caramel cracker," luca answers.
"damn, that sounds good," you say.
"yeah, it's a nice dish," he comes over to your side and puts away some freshly dried containers.
"uh you're good to go on your break, by the way. we can pick this up in 15,"
"are you sure?"
"yes. the gel needs to set anyways."
"thank you, chef," you smile and make your way to an area behind the restaurant for a smoke break. lucky for you, that area had a nice wooden bench. you take a seat and place a cigarette between your lips, lighting it.
taking your first drag, you shut your eyes and lean your head against the exposed brick of the building.
"i, uh, i don't suppose i could use your lighter, chef," a voice asks. the accent is instantly recognizable.
"oh, sure," you go over to where he's standing and close the distance between you as you light his bud.
you stuff your lighter back into your pocket but don't return to the bench.
"y/n," you say after a few moments.
"sorry?"
"it's just, uh, when we aren't in the kitchen, you can call me y/n,"
he nods.
"so tell me y/n," he says. "how do you like you copenhagen so far?"
"well, considering i've been in the city less than 48 hours, i have no complaints. the scenery is beautiful. food is pretty good and the people..." you look up at him. "i'm still getting to know the people."
he holds your gaze before letting out a cloud of smoke. "hmm."
if you didn't think there was a weird tension between you earlier, you definitely feel it now.
“if you, uh, ever want a proper tour, let me know,” luca says.
it takes everything you have to not breakout into a massive smile. “thanks, chef.”
“outside the kitchen, luca,”
this time you nod. “luca.”
he clears throat and steps on his cigarette. “well, we’d better get back inside and check on the gelee,”
“of course, how could we forget about the gelee,” you say following him back in and you swear you hear him chuckle.
when you got back to your station, you began blanching some large green leaves first by boiling it in hot water and then immediately dumping it in a metal bowl filled with ice water so it doesn't lose its colour.
luca took the metal bowl and brought it to the table behind you where the blender was. he takes a clump of the leaves and then adds water.
"start off low," luca says as he turns on the blender.
the loud noise jolts you a bit.
"you can see the colour change," he says as you move closer. "you see it starting to get brighter?"
"gorgeous colour," you say.
"yeah, it is."
luca pours the green liquid into a sifter and hands you the purified liquid.
he watches as you pour the liquid into a new bowl and asks you to to bloom the gelatin with the cold green liquid to prevent potential clumps.
the second half of your shift flew by because before you knew it, it was time to clock out of the day.
in the change room, you removed your apron and since you were alone you removed your shirt as well quickly sliding on the grey sweatshirt you came with.
just as you brought your sweatshirt down, luca walked in and stood at his locker across from you.
turning your head slightly to peek at him, you caught him pulling off his shirt and since his back was turned towards you, he couldn't see you drinking in the sight of him.
you turned back around and pressed your lips.
"uh, luca," you say.
"yeah?" he says.
"about that, uh, personal tour? is now a good time?" you slowly turn his way.
he cracked the faintest smile. "sure. anywhere particular in mind?"
you shake your head. "wherever you wanna show me,"
"in that case, might i suggest some sustenance first? does coffee sound good?"
"coffee sounds fucking great," you sigh and follow him out the door and on to the sidewalk.
"there's this cafe that i love just up the road," he says.
walking alongside him, you take in your height difference. he's probably 6'2" to your 5'7" so it was perfect.
when you arrive at a hole-in-the-wall cafe, that had blue painted bricks and picture frames of happy looking folks. probably customers or family members.
"hi," luca says going up to the old woman behind the counter. "can i get a medium black coffee and...." he looks to you to say your coffee of choice.
"just a caramel latte please,"
"a caramel latte," he repeats "and two snegls please,"
you grab a table for the two of you near the window so you can people watch while luca gets your order. it's midday now and you watch as people in their own little lives pass by the window.
luca makes his way to you holding two coffee cups and clutching two bags of pastries.
"okay now can i ask what the hell a snegl is?" you say once he's seated.
"sure. it's cinnamon roll style pastry but shaped like a snails shell if that makes sense," he explains.
"so a cinnamon bun?"
he was going to refute your statement but upon seeing the look on your face, he concedes. "yeah, it's a cinnamon bun,"
you guys shard a small laugh.
"so long have you been a cook?" he asks taking a sip of his hot drink.
"about six years now. i went to university for psychology but didn't really feel like it was my thing," you answer.
"so you dropped out?"
"no. after all the hard work my parents did to raise me, dropping out, no matter how disengaged i was, was not an option. so i got that degree but i did tell them the truth. that my heart wasn't in it for that right reasons."
"so how did you fall into cooking?" luca sat up ready to hear your story.
"my dad taught me everything i know," you say a lump started to form in your throat. "i swear his favourite place besides his bed was the kitchen."
luca stayed silent and let you collect yourself. "he passed recently... but he was the best mentor i could have asked for."
"i'm sure he's proud," luca said with sincerity.
you give him a small smile.
"what about you?" you say ready to move on before you start crying in front of your hot co-worker. "how long have you been doing this?"
"uh, fourteen years now..."
"oh, so you started when you were three?" you ask deadpanned.
he chuckles. "close enough, yeah."
"and with that accent i'm guessing you're from london."
"you'd be correct. and you're from chicago?"
"born n raised," you confirm. "so did you go to culinary school?"
"i didn't. no. i didn't do too well in school. got in quite a bit of trouble. ditched the check. they caught me. made me wash dishes, and, uh, i loved it."
"wow, you might be the only person i know that loves washing dishes,"
he shrugs. "it gives me time to reflect."
"fair enough," you hold your hands up. "i can't argue with that."
"so, uh, you said your dad passed recently, but how recent? if you don't mind me asking?"
"no, not at all. i love talking about him," you say. "he died a little over a year ago and not gonna lie... i didn't handle it too well. it was sudden. in his sleep. so i had no chance to say goodbye and i think that's what still hurts more than anything."
you let a tear fall but quickly wiped it away. "i'm sorry."
"you never have to apologize to me. ever. and especially for crying," he hands you a tissue that came with the pastries.
"you're an only child?" he asks taking out a snegl and placing one in front of you.
"i have two brothers. and you?"
"uh, yeah. i have a younger sister somewhere... yeah,"
"somewhere?" you echo taking slow bites of your snegl.
he clears his throat. "half-sister, i have to clarify. my parents separated when i young and my mum quickly found someone new. then my sister came along and then one day... my mum just left. no goodbye or anything just a note saying she wanted to focus on herself... my step-dad got custody of my sister and well i was 18 by that time so i moved out and moved on."
you stay silent for a few seconds. you couldn't believe a mother could abandoned her kids like that, especially someone as great as luca.
"she's missing out... your mom."
"yeah," he sighs.
you were starting to see luca in a different light. after telling him your story and you his, all you wanted to do was hold him and hope to ease his pain and loss. but you couldn't do that so you opted for something safer. kind of...
"hey, want to come back to mine and i can cook us a meal or something?"
"you still wanna cook after today?"
"you can take the cook out of the kitchen, but you can’t take the kitchen out of the cook."
he laughs at that. "okay, let's go."
you and luca talk some more on the way to your place. he makes you laugh telling stories of his younger rugrat days in london and when you're talking, he hangs on to your every word.
"you... live on a boat?" he says when you arrive.
you look back opening the door. "cool, huh?"
"very."
you turn to luca as you place your bag on a hook at the front door. "can i get you anything?"
"water is fine," he says taking a seat the dining table. you get his water and tell him to make himself comfortable as you went up stairs to change into a t-shirt and loose jeans.
it's only when you make your way back down and see luca sitting at the table, that you've realized how small your space and intimate your living space was.
"what's on the menu for tonight, chef?" luca asks as he spots you coming down the steps.
"home made pizza, if your elegant taste buds can handle that?" you reply.
"i can never turn down a pizza,"
you got started on the dough and soon enough luca is by your side helping. what was supposed to be you cooking for him, turned to him taking over and doing all the work which you let him happily.
"how did you get good at this?" you ask as you finished with your slice.
he exhales. "honestly, i made a lot of mistakes."
"so that's the secret then? just fuck up?"
he smiles. "it might be, you know, fuck up."
"i think 'cause i started early, i got my skill set up really quick and then started to feel like i was really the best, you know, like at all these really good places. i really was the best cook. and then i started at this really great place as a commis. and this other chef started the same day as me, and..." he sighs.
"i thought we were competition, um, but really we weren't. he was better than me. much, much better than me. he worked harder and faster than i ever could. and it was the first time i realized that i wasn't the best," he confides.
"and i was never gonna be the best. so i started looking at it like it was a good thing. like, at least i knew who the best was now, and i could take that pressure off myself. and the only logical thing to do was to try and keep up with him. so i never left this guy's side."
"and you got better," you say.
"oh, i got better than i ever thought i possibly could be just from trying to keep up with him."
"that's incredible, honestly," you say putting the dirty dishes in the sink and hopping on the counter.
"thanks but i think at a certain stage it becomes less about skill and it's more about being open."
"open?" you echo.
"yeah. to-to the world, to yourself, to other people. you know, most of the incredible things that i've eaten haven't been because the skill level is exceptionally high or there's loads of mad fancy techniques. it's because it's been really inspired, you know." he says.
"i like that," you say softly.
"you can spend all the time in the world in the kitchen, but if you don't spend enough time out there..." he trails off but you understood what he meant.
"right," you nod.
luca lifts his gaze to you. "it helps to have good people around you, too."
"is what i am? good people?" you smile coyly.
he gets up and walks over to you, placing his hands on either side of the counter in front of you. "honestly? i really think so."
a few moments go by where luca just studies your face and you can feel your heart beating a million miles per hour.
"you are so fucking beautiful," he finally says. his voice barely above a whisper.
those words set your body aflame. you parted your lips and he leaned. "may i?"
"please," was all you managed to get out before luca held your chin and guided your lips to his. he was taking things slow, trying to sus your level of comfortability and giving you the chance to pull away if you wanted but you didn't want that. ever.
you brought your arms around his neck pushing him closer to you. the kiss got heavier and you moaned as he bit your lip. "i have been wanting to do this since i first saw you,"
"good because i've wanted this too," you say as luca starts to kiss your neck and moves his hands under your top.
he slides his hand up and down your back and then around to your boobs to start playing with your nipples. you lean your head back and revel in his affection.
you were desperate to get his hands on him as well so you lifted the black hoodie he adorned wanting to see his chest that you caught just a glimpse of earlier.
"wow," you say as you running both hands across his pecs and abs. you trail your fingers down south before you cup him through his jeans. "is this okay?" you whisper.
"more than okay," he lets out as you message him through his jeans.
he moves to take off your top next and you help, revealing your bare chest to him. luca looks at you in awe and immediately attaches his lips to your nipple while still playing with other.
you unbutton your jeans and luca helps you shimmy out of them.
"fuck," he whispered at the sight of you sitting completely naked and ready for him. he slides two fingers up and down your slit. "you're so wet, is this all for me?"
you whimper at his touch, spreading your legs wider. "all for you, luca."
he brings his fingers to his lips to taste you. "just like i imagined, you taste so sweet" he says as he gets on his knees and slides you to the edge of the counter.
the first lick was heaven. you couldn't help but throw your head back and moan. luca doesn't waste anytime, eating you like your his last meal.
"l-luca," you whine as he sucks on your clit. you grab his golden locks as he laps at your cunt.
"you're the best thing i've ever tasted," luca says in between licks. coming from a chef, that was the highest praise a girl could get.
he detaches himself from your cunt, his nose, lips and chin covered in your juices. he stands and holds your face in his hands and kisses you. you taste yourself on his tongue as he slipped it down your mouth.
"i need to fuck you or else i'm gonna lose my mind," he says in breathy whispers.
"upstairs," is all you said before he carries you in that direction and up the stairs to your bed.
luca drops you on the bed and you lay on your forearms and watch as him takes off his jeans and then his boxers. as he pulls that down, he watches you watch him.
your eyes go wide at the sight of his hard, and rather large, dick. you reach to wipe the pre-cum leaking from his tip, pressing it to your lips. he groans and climbs on top of you. "condom?"
"i'm on the pill," you say caressing his hair back and bringing his lips back to yours.
luca takes his aching dick and rubs it against your slit. "are you ready?"
"mmhm," you say as he wraps your legs around his waist as he sinks into you.
muffled moans are exchanged between the two of you as your mouths clashed hungrily.
"you're so big, luca" you say, squeezing down on his eliciting a hiss from him.
"y-yes squeeze me like that again... fuck," he thrusts his hip into you at a steady pace as you scratched your nails across his muscled back.
"this feels so good," he murmurs.
you gasp as he pulls out almost all the way only to push back int you again. you pull your knees up so he can reach deeper inside you. you could feel him stretching you and filling you up, his beautiful face inches away from yours as he peppers your neck with sloppy kisses.
the sounds falling from your lips are incoherent, his pace moving at a high speed as he wants to get you off. it didn't take long for you to gain the warm sensation in the pit of your stomach. "i'm so c-close,"
"yeah? cum for me, darling," he moans keeping that speed that he's at, his dick throbbing inside you as well signalling he was gonna cum soon.
luca let out a throaty groan before he snaps his hips into you, feeling his first load release into your cunt. you follow close behind as you cover his dick with your wetness but he stills fucks you through your high.
as you catch your breaths, he leans his forehead against your collarbone before he pulls out.
"wait there," he says and goes downstairs and comes back up just as quickly carrying paper towels. he smiles to himself seeing you in your current position all fucked out, liking the effect he had on you.
the bed dips as luca makes his way to you and cleans you up.
you slide under the covers, and when he discards the paper towels, he joins you.
"that was good," you say as he brings you into his chest.
his fingers trail up and down your arm softly while he lays his head on top of yours.
"it was," he says planting a kiss on your head.
"can we stay like this for a bit?" you ask not wanting this moment to end.
"yeah, i'm not going anywhere," he says.
between the day that you had and luca caressing you, you let tiredness wash over you.
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tags: @leopard-skin-pillbox-hat-ok, @eddiemunsonreader, @sodapop182, @haydensith, @inpraizeof, @thecraziestcrayon, @zeeader, @tiana76, @jackierose902109
hope you guys enjoyed part two and thank you for all the support on the first part! part three is coming soon <3
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sherlockig · 1 year ago
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Hello my little grieving friends (aka my CREW!)
I just want to talk about how much our flag means death has given me. I have not had internet friends since i were a teenager. They all kind of disapeared over time in the same way as high school classmates went away. I have been on this blog on tumblr since 2010 and i have never experienced what ofmd has given me. Not even in my very derranged ca 5 year long sherlock-era did i get to befriend and know this many amazing people who live in my phone. Some of you have come and gone and that is life, but some of you are still here and I hope I get to keep you here for a very long time. Max can not stop us and I want to be here with you until tumblr is put down like the beloved rabid pet it is.
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I think we are all taking the news very hard and I think it's important to remember what it is all about really. It's about love and family and above all else the crew so i just want to show some love for my beloved mutuals. And i hope maybe some of you will be inspired to do the same because its what we need in these dark times. We need to be a lighthouse guiding each other to shore.
First of all @gentlebeard - Ella💕 my beloved honey 🍯 I can not explain properly or even believe how lucky I am that I found you and that I get a little good morning from you every day. We have been talking every single day since the first message over a year ago and I don't remember or want to remember how i survived before that. I will treasure the time i spent drinking pina coladas on your balcony in the sun forever and i hope i will get some more time on that balcony this summer. I have found a pirate bar in Sweden so we can continue our expensive pirate drinks theme that we started in Berlin. There is no one else i want to spend 6-8 hours talking to over the phone.💕My partner in crime, lasagna partner and floor person or whatever nicknames we have come up with during this time. You are not just the perfect friend to have, you are also funny, sweet, smart and a expert at making fanvideos that make me cry my heart out and laugh my lungs up - sometimes at the same time 💕💕
@blakbonnet - Meow my darling💕 you were the first one i really started to talk to in the fandom and i am so glad i did. You brighten my days and i love talking to you you brilliant humanbeing (i often find myself thinking i have listened to much to cabin pressure because i struggle to use any other word than brilliant to explain things.. the Arthur runs deep in me) also thank you for being my personal skincare guide in life!! Your fics, your art, your edits, your gifs, your meta the whole you make my dash a better place and we are all happy to have you! There is nothing you are not good at and i am both a bit jealus and impressed by you. Its Meows fandom we all just live in it 💕💕
@youshouldseemeinadeerstalker - Nes my dear💕 We may not be talking very often but I know I always have you there. I loved our vacation together and we had so much to talk about that we didn't even realize that the same song kept playing in my car so long that it messed up my spotify wrapped. It was amazing taking naps with you outside ruins of castles and in botanical gardens and living together in the worlds smallest hotel room. I hope we can get lost together in more cities than Hamburg and Copenhagen. (preferably without rain and sickness and maybe with a map) 💕💕
@darkinerry - Marlena 💕 its a pleasure getting weather and work updates from you and i am always interested in knowing what you have been up to and what you have to say. It brightens my day, please never stop!! Your videos and gifsets can make any day better and you are always kind and funny which are two things i appreciate hugely in my friends!! 💕💕 + You have the coolest haircut out of all my mutuals 😌
@aha-my-villainous-thoughts - Ash my wife💕 my love💕Nothing can make me scream, blush and giggle as much as your fanart. You have this style of everything you make from fanart to dolls to interior design that is so special and breathtaking. One day we will drink so many lattes in a cosy cafe and then sniff lush products for the rest of the day. 💕 You are always there for me - as a online shoulder to cry on or to motivate me with the smuttiest wips ever. I am happy to be mutual married to you 💕💕
@bizarrelittlemew - Ida 💕- my thirsting for rhys brother in arms. I can not imagine tumblr without your gifs or your posts. I love screaming with you over a picture of rhys darbys bicep. I am so happy i got to meet you this summer and i really hope it will happen again. We are not that far from each other, just some miles and a stupid bridge; we can make it. You are always a sweetheart and an incredible friend who write the hottest fanfiction ever💕💕
@dickfuckk - josh 💕 (who I also thought for a long time was called tyler) I dont know where the fandom would be without your bts blog! its a international treasure and a service to humanity. i don't know how you do it. 💕You always have everything i have ever been looking for and as a bonus you are witty and funny like no one else. I am so happy i got to meet you and spend a whole day in your company! 💕
@izzy-b-hands - Holden my absolute darling!💕 I am so glad I got the chance to get to know you! You are smart, funny and kind and my izzy mutual tm. You are always there for me with kind words and I am still forever shipping izzy and the third badminton brother which I think is the best headcanon I have ever helped coming up with. 💕
@funforahermit - Kristina 💕 Your love for Rhys and your gifs are a staple on tumblr and my dash. I know where to go when i need someone to understand how hot Steve is (even if we have agreed that he is yours and Murray is mine which i still think is a fine deal). I very often make or see a picture of Rhys and my first thought is "I NEED TO SHOW KRISTINA THIS" so you live rentfree in my brain 💕
@rainbowcrowley - Addi 💕If i ever start playing wow again you bet i am gonna be talking your ear off about my little frost mages progress but in the meantime i am happy to have you on my dash and even if we don't talk that much are you a beloved part of my dash and brighten it daily.💕💕
@fandomsmeantheworldtome - Maria💕 You were one of the very first people i found in this fandom and your gifs might have helped my rhys obession taking form. You might be into many things I have never heard of but its a pleasure seeing your excitement over everything. You are always a ray of sunshine and i love that so much💕💕
@tabbystardust - Tabby dear💕 You are the kindest person I know who I always get the strongest need to hug and hold close. Your fanart is beyond this world and i adore it like nothing else. Its always both hot and soft in the best way ever💕 I am always excited to get kitty updates and to hear about your ramen receipts. I hope we can still meet at the con next year! I am game if you are!! 💕💕
@hummingbee-o0o - Humming 💕 (i dont know your name sorry) I am always excited to hear your thoughts and metas about everything ofmd related as well as your beautiful art. 💕 it was a pleasure to scream about season 2 after every watched episode!💕
@xoxoemynn - Emy 💕💕 i am so happy to be mutual with you! 💕You always bring joy to the people who get to be around you and fill my dash with the same. We might not talk often but i know you got my back! That is the kind of person you are!💕
@saltpepperbeard - Jodi💕 No one write tags on tumblr dot com like you. There is nothing that can cheer me up more than see that one of my posts has gotten a whole ass novel written in the tags and then i instinctively know that its you who have left your wonderful mark. You are always excited and such a lovely human to be mutual with. 💕 And on top of that you make incredible gifs that make my heart stop!!! 💕💕
@autumnbois - Kai 💕💕 I hope you are doing okay. We might not talk much right now but you were there for me when i needed it most and you are a good friend to have living in my phone.💕💕 I will think of you whenever i see something related to scream and your love for piccrew always make me smile💕
@edsbacktattoo - Jams, jams jams! 💕 We are never online at the same time because of the damn time differences *shakes fist* but you are a staple in this fandom. Your art is incredible and you are the sweetest cookie in the jar. You are funny and always spread good energy to everyone around you and I love that with my whole heart💕💕
@kiwistede - Sam 💕 Your love for stede and rhys is unmet and i love you for that. You are always a good source for some rhys darby insanity and we all know that is what i treausure most here in life! 💕💕
@stedesearring - Kaitlin💕 You are the sweetest and kindest soul out here always spreading joy and love like the sun of my dash. 💕 I always love seeing you and i am happy to have the pleasure to have you as a friend in my phone! 💕💕
@stedebonnets - Ara 💕 Where would we be without your gifs?? without your joy?? without your blog?? without you?? No one knows! I am so happy to call you a mutual and friend and you always bring a smile to my face. Always!!💕💕
@appleteeth - Liz 💕 No one is quite as normal about rhys darby as you and it a pleasure to watch! Speaking of pleasure.. your fic the slightest touch is an all time favorite of mine and i would be embarrassed to tell you how many times i have read it... you are one of my mutuals that i am baffled that they want to follow me. Its a privilege! 💕
@as-a-creww - Caroline dear 💕 You are a beloved mutual and your blog are a permanent part of my dash and i want to keep it like that! you are the friendliest of the friendliest and what is more important than that?? 💕💕
@nandorisms - Ed dear💕 Your shameless reblogs makes the world go around. You are always sweet and a much needed wwdits addition to my life. I count you as a dear friend living in my heart!💕
@londonlock - Londie! 💕💕 The only sherlock mutual i have left and i am very happy to have kept you! 💕 I might have left those days behind me but you know as well as i that sherlock lives in my soul and seeing some sherlock and john love on a daily basis keep me grounded and on top of that are you such a romantic and beautiful human being! 💕💕
@follovver - Tanya 💕 My fellow Swedish ofmd fan! I am very happy to have found you! its nice to be able do discuss it in my mother tongue and i hope we one day can do it live! its to bad we never met when we went to the same uni (or maybe we did but didn't know) Du är fantastisk!! 💕
@wastingyourgum - Al💕(which i always read in my head as artificial intelligence and giggle because it make me feel like you are a robot) My fellow rhys friend. You bring me doses of darby when its most needed and your blog is always on fleek 💕💕
@xray-vex - Xray 💕 100 % one of my funniest mutuals!💕💕 You make hilarious posts that no one else could even dream of coming up with! Always top tier blog content and what more can a girl ask for??💕
@jellybeanium124 - Nina💕 I can not imagine my blog without you! Your posts are always a delight and you are so nice and sweet and funny and incredible (even when you make math mistakes kisses kisses) You bring a honest joy into the fandom that we could not live without! 💕💕
@thunderwingdoomslayer - Nellie 💕 My official rhys darby gif provider who I come to as if i needed a new hit of an illegal substance. I salute you and thank you for your service!💕💕
@forestofsprites - Green my dear 💕You might have gone from ofmd to be the supernatural provider of my dash but that does not stop you from being the kindest forest spirit i know. Your presence is calming in a way i can not explain and i am glad to have you and your love for meg here.💕💕
@cheersmequeers - Kate💕💕 A big puzzle piece to bring my dash together. Always filling it with my favorite gay pirates and i love having you here. Always friendly and full of love.💕💕
@sugashook - Sugaaa💕💕 You know i am in love with your art! Your art is always on top and it bring me back to life every time. I keep the dress i bought from you on the outside of my closet so every morning its the first thing i see and it sets the day right!💕💕 I wear your art on my tshirt to the gym as often as i can hoping to lure in a ofmd fan between the weights but that has not happened yet sadly!! Never stop making your art!! The world would be at loss if that happened 💕💕
@lacefuneral - Jay 💕(should be called YAY because that is what i say when i see a new selfie or fashion post from you) You are a fantastic friend and i love your love for stede and you are always kind and patient in a way that makes me comfortable to ask you questions about something i might not be familiar with. You are forever my moth mutual in my mind 💕💕
@meanmisscharles - Charles 💕 In my head i call you charles but i don't think that is your name but i hope its okay with you! Always friendly and sweet but ready to fight the bullshit the other spread! and such a source for good music recommendations!! 💕💕
@forpiratereasons - Darcy 💕literary no one does it like Darcy! Aways bringing the best ofmd posts to my dash and ensuring i don't miss anything! You are incredible! 💕💕
@blackbeardskneebrace - Miles my dear 💕 You make incredible art both the cute and amazing ofmd art but also the gorgeous historical art you post. Its a pleasure to see you talk about history but also about our beloved gay pirates. Your snoopy ofmd art will live in my heart forever and i think it might be healing me a bit. Maybe even watering my crops and clearing my skin! And those valentine ofmd arts from last year. I am 100 % gonna bring them back this February like beloved decorations you store in the attic. 💕💕💕
@awkward-fallen-angel - Heather 💕 You are one of the sweetest people i have had the pleasure to come across. You bring a big excitement and attention to the things you like and it moves along to everyone near. I mean i have watched long critical role videos just because you spoke so warmly about them and i wanted to know what it meant. I love having you here. 💕💕
@mxmollusca - Mx 💕 (dont know your name so i am just calling you that) I mean you are an incredible writer. I have only managed to read ifwts once because i cried so much that i am scared to open it again because i might just never stop crying. You are creative and funny and absolutely totally normal about rhys darby which in my book is a very good thing to be. And besides that you are a very friendly and nice mutual who is always a pleasure to interact with. 💕💕
@poisonintopositivity - Lilias💕 We have not talked much but we have been mutuals for a very long time and i hope you know that i appreciate you greatly as a mutual and you always but the best posts on my dash!💕💕
@glam-hutchence - Birb 💕💕my dear bird lover! You are a sweet potatoe and i love reading about your love for music and the concerts you go to.💕 Its so nice to take a little part of your life. You are always there for me and i always get happy when i talk to you. You are like a little happy pill! 💕💕
@turtles-on-turts - Turts 💕 Whenever i see a turtle i think about you. Its your brand! You make amazing art! and the ones on canvas always blow me away. 💕💕 Its incredible. You are also so very pretty and i have that picture of you in your depression robe with all the pigeons imprinted in my mind because it such a cute one. You are always very friendly and i love reading your personal posts as well. 💕💕
@vonlipwig - Franky 💕 You bring me lots of normality about rhys darby but these days also a huge bunch of normality about david tennant which i appreciate a lot. You are very nice and i stand by my assesment that you have a very cool aura!💕💕
@haeva - Mar my beloved💕 You bring me my wifes emily and valkyrie and a bunch of amazing posts about everything i can imagine. You are loving and sweet and good at maths which i am always very impressed by. I love being your mutual and doing ask games with you is a pleasure!💕💕
@mykonossalome - Myko💕 When i see moomin i think of you because i know how much you love it. We dont talk as much as i would like but the interactions we have had has meant a lot to me and i love seeing you posting about the things you love! 💕💕
@cottoncandiescupcakes - Cupcake 💕 I love that you are always so excited over our boy the swede and its a pleasure to compare language with you. We can continue fighting if the swede belong to the dutch or the swedes but that is a pleasure!💕💕
@mister-brightside - Andrea my dear💕. Your art is always perfect and whenever i see a picture of izzy giving the middle finger i think about you! Its your brand and its your picture now and no one can change that. You are sweet and caring and a lovely mutual to have. thank you!💕💕
@merryfinches - Kylie 💕 What can i say more than that i ADORE your fanart. The colours the style the softness of it all is exactly what we all need in these times. Every single time it shows up on my dash it makes my heart grows softer and my love grow stronger! I love it so so much. 💕
@ofmd-ann - Ann 💕 You glorious glorious gifmaker! Your gifs are always beautiful and these last days you have saved me with your wrecked edits. As a supplier of rhys darby gifs i love you forever. You are a hero love. 💕💕
@usersukuna - Bia 💕You are a gif magician. Your gifs are perfect and you are also very kind and sweet and i am so glad i can call you a mutual! You light up tumblr like no one else and i am always happy to see you on my dash.💕💕
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If you are not in this list it does not mean that i dont love you or have forgotten about you it means that tumblr has put a limit to how many people you can tag which sucks. But if i follow you then it means i love and appreciate you. 💕💕💕 And you know what? We will make it through this hard and trying times of greedy streaming services putting an end to our gay pirates show. I love you all and you know what??
We will make it through as A CREW!
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cloveroctobers · 6 months ago
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Hello, I was wondering if you could write angst with Luca from the bear where Luca spends more time at the cafe than he does at home. And him and reader possible get into an argument about it? It can end however you see fit. - ✨
SITUATIONS — LUCA [Summer Requests]
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A/N: angst you want? Say no more! I tweaked it just a bit so it ties in with s3, and it’s shorter than what I typically write but I hope you still like! ✨
WARNINGS: language & uncertainties in a relationship.
𓇼࿔*𝜗𝜚°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・ 𓇼࿔*𝜗𝜚°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・ 𓇼࿔*𝜗𝜚°❀⋆
“Do I need to be worried?” You spit out, feeling your heart hammer in your chest as you stand a great distance from the bonfire.
No matter how far you and Luca walked off, it was evident to your friends, old friends of his, and new friends that your conversation was anything but good.
You were beyond frustrated with Luca and that was rare. The both of you did pretty well at voicing exactly what may be going on with each other but ever since you chose to continue to follow him back to the states, back to Chicago, you gradually saw the change in your boyfriend of five years. It’s only been a week into month two. Some called you crazy for picking up your life yet again to be right beside Luca but love will make you do things others might not understand.
“What are you on about?” Luca’s brows curve in awards in confusion.
Folding your arms in defense you swallow, “Luca, you showed up almost two hours late here with her, with Sydney. I called you repeatedly after looking at the spaces nearly all day and it took your sister to show up to the new spot, to tell you to respond to me; that’s only because she lives on that side of town.”
Luca took a three month leave from Brimstone’s Gate and since your slowly growing e-commerce pottery business: Whimsy Glazes was mostly online, you were able to pick up and go as well, although the rental space you paid for in Copenhagen carried all of your supplies and equipment, you considered opening up a physical business once Luca voiced after a month being in Chicago, that he would contemplate moving to the states for a change and to be closer to his sister.
Again it felt like you were making the sacrifices to be here with him and not once did he ask you but it was started to feel like a given. Like you were expected to just follow and maybe that was your first mistake once you left New Zealand behind. That’s where the two of you met for the first time, you’ve been settled out there since after you graduated university but Luca showed you another piece of the world once he came into yours.
New Zealand was for you what Copenhagen was for him and now he wanted a change but did that also include a different path from you as well? You never had doubts about your relationship even making it this far and not to say that it was a spotless relationship but this situation was talking to your gut more than ever now.
Luca deeply inhales as he responds, “I truly apologize for that love. Time got the best of us and I’m bad with keeping my phone on silent…that sound’s like excuses I know and I’ll do better.”
Digging your fingers into your forearms you state, “see that’s the thing…I had a feeling you would say this to me but you’ve been at Shapiro’s spot constantly.”
Luca loved to give Chef Shapiro shit since he tended to be snarky, always observant along with being opinionated and pushy—or persistent according to him. Once his found his own space, got it inspected, made the changes, and started planning out the interiors, Shapiro was quick on looking for employees. He even considered Luca but it seemed like the now buzzed haired blond (for the season—his words, something else he recently changed as well) was also holding out much like Sydney.
So you heard.
Ultimately she made her decision.
“I alternate,” Luca interrupts, “between the bear and Smudges—I mean—The Blue-Chandelier Bistro—sheesh that’s still a fucking mouthfull isn’t it?” He attempts to lighten the tension but you’re not backing down which makes him sigh, “Babe, I’ve never given you a reason to be worried about us have I?”
Shaking your head you look away from his stare out into the darkest of the navy ocean, “No but it’s been five years and the way you’re around her reminds me of how you first approached me: Slightly awkward but talkative, curious, a glimmer in the left eye of yours.”
Luca’s shaking his head, reaching to grab your chin so that your focus is back on his, “No, don’t do that. I love you, only you. I feel like you’re looking for something that isn’t there. Syd and I are mates and I thought you two got on well too.”
“I like Sydney.”
That was not a lie. She was thoughtful, passionate, funny even, and you related to her on experiencing not being heard in spaces especially in art school. It’s what drove you to have your own business and be your own boss. You genuinely wanted to see her succeed and you wouldn’t be pointing the fingers at her. Call it insecurity or the purple devil (like you often did) but somewhere beneath it all the signs felt like they were becoming more clear.
“She brilliant.” Luca comments in admiration and you slowly nod your head, “I give credit where credit is due and over this short span of time, we’ve connected.”
“And spent a lot of time together.” You add, “Which you’re supposed to do with your kind of field, I get it. There’s a group chat that I’m not part of with you, Sydney, and Marcus and I just feel excluded majority of the time. I start to think: Is it because I’m not a chef so I wouldn’t get it?”
It couldn’t be because you still hung out with other chefs with and without Luca and although you understand that it was healthy to have separate moments from your partner…the pull was becoming evident and you weren’t sure how Luca didn’t see that.
Luca says, “No. I didn’t think you wanted to be in the chat honestly. I’m completely fine not being in yours with your friends.”
“Because you hate them but there’s not a single friend that you have that I hate. I tend to like who you have around because I trust your judgement.”
Luca scoffs, “but you don’t trust me when it comes to Sydney? Which I don’t appreciate by the way. I wouldn’t do that to you, to us. Not when we’ve been together for almost six years.”
Sometimes saying the amount of time spent together feels like a safety net, to remind yourselves that it’s been a good minute, that the love should still be there and it is. However it would be foolish to say that ever since the days flew by in Chicago that the changes were beginning to feel real. Luca had the opportunity to rebuild the gap in his relationship with his sister, consider a life here, view what the cooking atmosphere would be like in the Windy City permanently as he ran down the list of restaurants to tour, taste test, and cook in.
Life was a bit slower in Copenhagen and now this was starting to feel like a consequence and it shouldn’t be, not when you love someone this much.
“…if there’s something there, you need to tell me—
“But there’s not!” Luca finds himself yelling and that’s something he never wanted to do in a relationship. That was his rule, to talk things out and not to shout in order to be heard.
It was what reminded himself of his parents. The arguments would be so loud and long that he would knock on his older sister’s door to hide in there for the night. She would turn the tv up so loud and their night would turn into a whole slumber party of watching movies and playing games until their eyes called them to sleep. He always ended up crashing first while his sister, Georgina would sneak out to grab snacks because she knew Luca would wake up hungry once the house has gone quiet. They were once siblings that provided comfort while dealing with the loss of their parent’s union.
Luca rubs at his jaw in vexation, beginning to pace while your heart continues to pound inside of its cage. He clears his throat as he turns back to you, “I’m sorry for raising my voice and I’m sorry for making you think that there’s anybody else. I know being here means that we both have to find our footing again but I don’t have doubts.”
“That we’ll make it?” You quiz, wondering how the man you loved could be clueless.
Luca frowns, “We don’t need to make it, we just carry on like we always do.”
“I don’t think that’s working for me though, Lu. That’s what I’m trying to tell you.” You sigh, “there’s things going on for the both of us separately but what is there together?”
Luca goes silent at this. He wasn’t sure at first what you meant by this but as he starts to think, you only share moments at night in that cold stale hotel bed together and by then you’re both too tired to carry full on conversations. New information was only shared in passing before you’re both out the door again. There should be more than this like it once was but this can’t continue on if it feels like things are at a standstill.
“Then we’ll do whatever we need to do to get back where we should be.” Luca decides with determination in his eyes, “neither of us are quitters right? Don’t tell me you’ve given up?”
Your throat felt heavy with tears as you managed to get out, “…I’m scared Luca.”
“Good,” Luca exhales with a laugh as he pulls you into his arms, “that means you still give a shit about me and that’s a bit of a relief, I won’t lie.”
You sink into his arms, echoing his laughter you lock your arms behind his back squeezing your head against his chest, “I don’t think I can ever stop even if you don’t decide to stay.”
Luca feels his heart ache at your words because he didn’t believe that this was an end of an era for you two but now that it’s been brought to his attention, he realizes this situation is just as deep as you were experiencing it and he was willing to fight for it with you.
Saying goodbye didn’t sit right with Luca, since he tried to stay in long relationships and figured out what relationships entailed his time, energy, and heart. You were always worth it to him and he never wanted to imagine what life would be like without you.
So he kissed the top of your head mumbling, “I’m not going anywhere.”
That was a promise Luca intended to keep and you chose to believe him…unsure if this would be a mistake on your part underneath it all.
𓇼࿔*𝜗𝜚°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・ 𓇼࿔*𝜗𝜚°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・ 𓇼࿔*𝜗𝜚°❀⋆
Continue with my summer anthology writings & prompts here.
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yannaryartside · 3 months ago
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The importance of SydLuca for Sydcarmy
"This is what you wanted"
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This may be a controversial one, I originally shipped MarcusxLuca more, but that may still be my OTP alongside Sydcarmy (both ships will happen at the show's end). This may be shipper delusions, but I have a narrative-based argument.
Let me explain why I think Luca and Sydney's dating, cooking, and working together, as well as their falling in love, are essential to the show's themes.
Character development for Carmy
Guys, the reason it would be so significant for Carmy’s character development (reality check) that Sydney develops feelings for Luca is because Luca has admitted Carmy is better than him in the kitchen.
Carmy made the menu, the restaurant, all about himself. He wants to be the hero to compensate his emotional absence and issues. It gives him validation, the toxic narrative that all abuse is worth if you become the best.
The meaning of “this is what you wanted”
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He kept telling Syd: “this is what you wanted,” because that’s what he learned from his toxic chef. He may not be intentionally abusing Sydney as his boss abused him, but he is still prolonging the toxic dynamics he learned to survive in the Empire, thinking that if he can get a star, it will all be worth it in the end. The pain, the guilt, feeling lost. It would prove there is nothing wrong with him.
But it would also let him keep Sydney’s admiration (and her affection) he does what to be the best also because she came to his life saying “you are the best cdc in the best restaurant in the world” he thinks he needs to be the best in order for Sydney to ever want him in any way (friend/partner/romantic interest)
Which is obviously not true because Syd has stayed with Carmy while he has been anything but emotionally absent, a bad friend and ultimately a bad boss and even a bad chef, if we believe that last review calling him “uninspiring and chaotic”
Enters Luca
But then Luca will come in and steal his girl. A man with less awards, less known. Inferior in the culinary world. But Luca is (as far as we can see, specially in Forever) emotionally intelligent, present and kind. All the things Carmy could be if he deployed himself from his toxic narratives.
To be honest, the fact that Luca is physically everything that Carmy is insecure about himself (his height, face, being funny and intelligent) is kind of the cherry on top.
You can almost see his Pikachu face. "So you are telling me that I could have Syd if I was willing to be emotionally vulnerable and do the work?" (Carmy represents the whole male species right there.)
SYDNEY SIDE OF THE STREET.
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The line "is scary to rely on someone" she told Marcus could be telling us two things:
1.Syd doesn't know how to be truly emotionally vulnerable, maybe because of previous (recent) heartbreak (the 3 swords tattoo).
2. Syd is scared to rely on Carmy
And next season, this man will probably be even less reliable; he spent this whole season fantasizing and thinking Claire was the solution to all his problems. And I don't have any reason to believe that pursuing her will not be his goal next season, either. Some people even speculate that the next season will end in a fake ending, with Claire and Carmy leaving for Copenhagen and all that. Then we could have a surprise 5th season to entail all the lies. (this show has bo be put on trial)
So, if Sydney is scared of being emotionally vulnerable, sadly, she cannot learn that with Carmy. Not with the present one.
She should go on her own and stop relying emotionally and financially on Carmy for a while to get to know herself and what she wants, build a career that doesn't depend on him, trust in her own strength, grow and be confident, learn to love and be loved, and live a love that is not based 50% on struggle and 50% on hope.
So, when they decide to be together, both can start from a healthy place. The connection is there, and they still have a date with destiny.
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nolita-fairytale · 1 year ago
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don't you worry, there's still time | chef luca x fem!reader, feat. marcus brooks
summary: after losing his mother, marcus searches for joy and stillness in copenhagen. you and luca, who are more than happy to host, decide to take a big next step in your relationship. a oneshot from the world of 'burn your life down.'
warnings: fluff, light angst, grief, death, light smut, second person pov, swearing, danish inaccuracies, off-canon connection to the storyline of the bear.
word count: 5.8k
listen to: the playlist
a/n: wow, i missed this world! who is ready for the reveal of chef's restaurant name?! while i don't think i have the bandwidth to write another full series (nor a linear story to tell) i'm thinking of creating a second part to 'burn your life down' where we just get to drop in and see what they're up to. thoughts??
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chef luca masterlist | full masterlist
After a tumultuous holiday season, it doesn’t take long for Sydney to realize that her friend is in need of a little help. A reprieve, she so kindly explained to both Marcus and Carmy when she’d proposed the idea. 
It was Sydney this time, who called Luca, knowing that she and Carmy would have to find something to do with Marcus. It wasn’t fair – that he’d lost his mom just before Thanksgiving – and they both agreed that Marcus needed to get out of dodge. Quick to act, Carmy set up a few stages in NYC for a week or so, which, while seemed to inspire Marcus, seemed to only plunge him further into a slump come Christmas. “I don’t know. I think we gotta send him on some kinda… eat, pray, love trip. The guy can only sulk on my couch for so long before I consider jumping out of the window,” Sydney says, her attempt to lighten the mood with humor still genuine. “It’s getting sad, Carm. Like… real fuckin’ sad.”
“You’re right. Uh… what about Copenhagen?” Carmy pitches with a shrug, because he knows what all consuming grief feels like. 
“Again?” she asks, uncertain of whether it’s the best choice that they could make. 
“Yeah,” Carmy shrugs in response. “Think he got a lot of it last time. Could be good for him to go back to somewhere familiar… work with Luca again. You don’t think it’s a-?”
“No I do! I just-,” Sydney hesitates, though she knows her business partner makes a good point. “Familiarity will be good for him. To be around people he can trust.”
“You want me to uh-,” Carmy begins to offer, figuring he’ll make the call. 
“Probably best if I explain the situation. Just ‘cause, you know, I know more of what’s going on… just send me his info and I’ll call later,” Sydney interjects. 
Carmy agrees with a curt nod before adding in:
“Uh… okay yeah. Yeah.”
*
You get plenty of time to prepare for Marcus’ visit, performing all kinds of fancy footwork to arrange a proper visit – a week’s worth of time spent staging and living in Copenhagen. When Luca finds out that the prolific houseboat, a chef retreat of sorts that’s always been an option for lodging, is booked for the week and a half that Marcus plans on visiting, you offer up your place without hesitation. 
The arrangement goes as follows: while Marcus stays at yours at no cost, you’ll stay with Luca for the duration of the time. 
This is how you find yourself at the massive Ikea on Dybbølsbro on a Saturday morning with Luca, in search of a set of fresh bed linens intended for guests. 
“I really should host more. And Astrid said she and Lina were planning a trip out here so… why not kill two birds with one stone?” you’d reasoned to your boyfriend, making a strong case for why you and Luca should make this little shopping trip. 
“What do you think of the blue?” Luca asks you, as you run your hand over a set of the display sheets, checking for softness. 
“Don’t know if the blue is what I’m going for. I was thinking of something warmer. Maybe a yellow or… I don’t know. I’ve kind of been into that trendy rust color as of late,” you reply with a shrug, moving onto the warmer colors. 
Luca chuckles and with a small shake of his head, he clarifies his previous questions with:
“No, I meant for me.”
“What do you mean?” you ask him curiously, his comment pulling all of your focus as you search his face for answers. “You just got new bedding.” 
And expensive ones too. 
But as your eyes follow his gaze, you realize that he’s not talking about sheets, focused on the XL Twin-sized duvets just above where the sheets messily fall along the shelf. 
“I was thinking…” Luca trails off, checking in with you before he continues, with “... maybe it’s time I get two duvets… you know… for us.” He takes a beat, and a step towards you, and you know you’ll never stand a chance against his boyish charm as one side of his mouth turns up into a smile. 
You’re no stranger to the Scandinavian duvet method – two twin duvets for one king sized bed – but it sounds like Luca’s suggestion is about way more than buying an extra duvet on this trip. 
“I want you to feel at home… at my place."
“I do,” you reply, almost instantly, a warmth spreading through your belly as you take a step towards him. 
“But I mean really… feel like it’s your home. Because it is. It could be. You know… if you want it to be,” Luca continues, this time with more insistence, a look of hopefulness in his deep blue eyes. 
“Are you… are you asking me to move in with you?” you manage to get out, your heart skipping a beat. 
“Why not? We could use this week to try it out,” he suggests so casually that you practically have to do a double take. “See how it goes while Marcus stays at your place?”
“Yeah I-... that sounds like a good plan, yeah,” you stammer out, the grin on your face undeniable as you nod enthusiastically in the middle of a goddamn furniture store. 
“Besides,” Luca says, clearing his throat as his tone changes to one that’s much more playful. “You’re an absolute blanket hog and a repeat offender at that.” Luca winks your way as you roll your eyes with a laugh in response. “This could prevent some of our silly little quarrels, don’t you think, love?” 
“Uh huh,” you sound, your face skeptical as you look his way again. “Preventative measures. Sure, babe.”
Luca chuckles before leaning down to press a chaste kiss to your lips, right then and there, in the Ikea bed linen section, the place you’ll now forever think of as the place your boyfriend asked you to move in with him.
Connection
When Marcus arrives in Copenhagen, you’ve arranged your home with the most comfort in mind, having already packed a week’s worth of things and left for Luca’s. You can only imagine what he must be going through, deciding that something like that – losing your mother – though inevitable, is your goddamn worst nightmare. 
“Marcus, 
Enjoy your stay and please reach out if you need anything. I can’t wait to meet you!”
…is the note that you leave him, along with a few morning pastries you picked up from your favorite baggeri across the street, and your number scribbled down at the bottom of the notepad. 
As Marcus arrives, his eyes drawn immediately to your note and gift, Marcus smiles to himself, noticing that you left a very nice looking bottle of wine on the counter as well. He’s moved by your generosity, considering you’ve never met, and the fact that you’re willing to take so much care, extend this much kindness to a stranger, causes a wave of softness to wash over him. 
Maybe, just maybe, he can find softness again – the last few months riddled with pain, grief, and numbness to get through the days. 
While he came here to work, encouraged by his friends that a change of scenery may do his broken heart some good, it’s the first time Marcus has had a chance to be still. His feelings of grief sit heavier here and it catches him off guard, uncertain that he’s quite ready to sit with them yet. He pushes aside the thought, focusing on exploring your home and unpacking his bags. Marcus knows how to stay busy – he’s become an expert at it by now – reminding himself that he’s got work at 5 am sharp tomorrow.
*
“A little too much, chef. Take it down by about 15 grams,” Luca directs, his voice even and sure as he inspects the balls of dough that Marcus currently shapes. 
“Yes, chef,” Marcus nods in understanding, plopping the ball of dough back on the scale to adjust the measurement. 
The two of them work like this for the rest of the morning, Luca treading carefully while keeping things professional, while Marcus buries himself in the work – something that feels good, safe, right. 
He’s missed this. While Marcus has one chef he works with directly at the restaurant, he’s the expert – the head patissier. He misses being surrounded by excellence, getting to be a student of someone who is just as driven, if not more, and inspired. It’s good, quiet, calm, yet there’s a focus and intensity in Luca’s kitchen that feels like a breath of fresh air. 
His stage trip to New York has been more of a mess than beneficial. Maybe it had been the chaos of the city, or the chaos of the chefs he was working with. Maybe it was the fact that Marcus, though hungry for a distraction, hadn’t quite been ready to walk directly into the line of fire yet.
As Marcus’ practiced hands move with the dough, there’s a newfound confidence in the way that he works that's not lost on Luca. Luca watches his friend carefully, pride swelling in his chest as his mentee makes the adjustment with ease and diligence.
“Can I join you?” Luca asks, gesturing towards Marcus' workstation. 
“‘Course, chef,” Marcus replies, his response short yet reverent. 
As Luca joins him, finding a space to the right of Marcus, he busies his hands with rolling each perfectly measured ball of dough into mini boules, ready to proof. The two of them work quietly, side by side, the air between them heavy with words unsaid. He can feel it – the weight that lays so heavily on Marcus' heart – but Luca doesn’t want to bring it up, uninterested in forcing the conversation. Especially about something so painful, something he knows that Marcus has barely begun working through. 
“Thanks, again. For uh… you know… letting me come work,” Marcus begins, momentarily checking in with Luca to gauge a reaction. 
“‘Course,” Luca replies, his answer instantaneous. “You’re welcome here any time, mate.” 
“Yeah?” Marcus asks, stealing a glance in Luca’s direction.
“Yeah,” Luca responds with a certain nod. 
“And uh… shit. I can’t thank your girlfriend enough for letting me crash at her place,” Marcus adds, as he works through his discomfort and overwhelm from the wave of feelings that begin to bubble up in his chest.
“You can thank her yourself on Saturday,” Luca brings up, excited over the fact that Marcus will not only be meeting his girlfriend, but staging at her restaurant too. “She’s really looking forward to meeting you.” 
Marcus nods slowly, his hands the only steady thing about him as he continues to focus on his work. 
“I just mean-, well, she didn’t have to-. ‘S not like either of you owed it to me or anything and I-. You guys just really came through…” Marcus trails off, wanting to make his gratitude clear. It means more to him that he can articulate so instead he settles for, “So thank you. Again.”
Luca shrugs with an aplomb about him as he returns with, “We got you, mate.” He pauses before continuing, fully aware that Marcus isn’t quite comfortable with the feelings that have presented themself in this moment. “And the way I see it, I wouldn’t have met her if it weren’t for you – for our conversation the last time you were here – so we really do owe you for it.”
This time Luca makes an effort to check in with Marcus, gauging his emotional capacity as he concludes with:
“But that’s not what any of this is about: debts, who owes who what. We were both more than happy to host you. That’s what mates are for.”
It’s not till the end of the next shift that it hits him, and Marcus finds himself sitting outside of the restaurant on a bench across the street. He’s not sure whether it’s the jet lag or the exhaustion of the 5 am start time in another time zone, but it hits him all at once, like a ton of bricks. Suddenly consumed with the feelings that he’s been trying his best to avoid, all he can do is pause, completely caught off guard by the strength of them. 
Quietly, Luca joins him, having spotted him on his way home, rerouting himself in Marcus’ direction instead. 
All he can think of are the words you’ve asked him, and he you, time and time again – the ones that cut right to the core of you each and every time – that show you how much he cares. 
“How’s your heart?” Luca asks Marcus, after a few minutes of sitting on the bench together in silence. 
And how is his heart? 
He’s not sure how to answer, considering it’s been a while since he’s really had a chance to check in, the crippling reality of this great loss is too much to bear alone. 
His heart is broken, shattered into an infinite amount of pieces. 
He, and his heart will never be the same again and he doesn’t know where or how he’ll ever put it back together. 
His heart is… lost, in desperate need of finding a soft place to land. 
Marcus takes a while to answer, racking his brain for any semblance of a cohesive answer. 
He waits. And then he waits. 
Until finally, he can answer. 
“I uh… don’t know. But I’m hoping this trip will help me figure that out.”
Creativity 
“do you remember the 21st night of september? love was changin' the minds of pretenders while chasin' the clouds away.” (earth, wind, and fire.)
Everything about the way you run your kitchen feels different than what he’s used to. 
It’s sure as hell different from his last stage trip to New York, Marcus thinks to himself.
With Carmy and Syd, working with them, there’s a buzz of chaos that runs underneath even the most organized and efficient service. It’s something integral to what they have, gives an edge to The Bear that seems to make it hum in all the right ways. Even with Luca, who comes from fine dining and Michelin-starred restaurants, there’s a quiet and determined focus – an intensity to his work – even without the undercurrent of chaos. 
But this. But you. 
Your kitchen somehow teeters the line of organized chaos and reckless play so well that Marcus understands why this works – why it’s efficient. 
Still, he watches as you and your staff dance – no, literally dance – around each other to the highly recognizable Earth, Wind, and Fire tune. Mathilde sings along while chopping chives for the brothy mushroom grain bowl, while, mid-phrase, manages to yell out a short command to a line cook in Danish. Out of the corner of his eye, Marcus catches Jesper working the dining room, while you finish plating two more dishes, ready to be walked out. 
It’s as if you find focus in the center of all the noise, somewhere between the electric energy between you, Mathilde, and your staff, and the feel-good vibes and homeyness of the restaurant that you’ve created. 
You had been more than welcoming when Marcus had walked through the doors of your restaurant, Kokuore, mere hours ago. You’d given him the tour, shown him which station he’d be working this evening, then warmly introduced him to your entire team before family meal started. Marcus can’t stop moving, too afraid to be still in fear of falling apart in the presence of how comforting you’ve been. 
And this? Your kitchen. It’s all joy, connection, and artistry. 
It’s not hard for him to see why Luca fell in love with you. 
“Marcus, feel free to take a break,” he hears you say, as you nod towards the dining room through the open kitchen. 
As Marcus follows your gesture, he notices that Luca’s arrived, remembering something about a standing Saturday date. 
“You sure, chef?” Marcus asks, looking to you for approval. 
“Positive,” you nod, reassuringly.
Marcus nods in return to confirm, before taking his apron off and making his way over to the dining room where Luca is exchanging a few words with Jesper. 
“Wassup, chef,” he greets his mentor. 
“You know, you can call me Luca,” Luca reminds him with a crooked smile. “At least when we’re off the clock.”
Marcus chuckles, “Uh… yeah alright. That’s gonna take some getting used to.” 
Luca chuckles in return, before Jesper shows them to his table, mentioning something about Americans being so afraid of fluidity. 
“She’s brilliant isn’t she?” Luca asks, in reference to you as his eyes catch yours from across the room. 
“Nah for real. Like… mad scientist vibes,” Marcus concurs with a smile. “She can throw down for sure.” He pauses as they sit down at Luca’s table. “So you come every Saturday night, huh?”
“When I can, yeah, which is… most Saturdays,” Luca replies honestly, before beginning to list why he’s kept up this routine. “But it’s nice. Keeps me inspired. I get to see my girl, walk her home at night which makes me feel better.” Luca leans back in his chair this time, crossing his arms over his chest. “And I never mind helping close down at the end of the night.”
Marcus hums in response before one of the waitstaff comes to their table, with a glass of wine in hand, on the house. They chat for a little longer before Marcus returns to the kitchen, his excitement for what you’re doing here filling him to the brim. 
As dinner service comes to an end, Marcus can’t help but notice the chemistry and how unique it is as you all work together in perfect harmony. There’s a warmth to it, something different, and he begins to understand why the name of the restaurant comes from the word, heart. 
Luca is quick to get up from his table, quickly finishing his glass of wine as he offers to help close down. The music volume goes from underscoring the buzz of a busy night of service, to the main attraction, as a motown throwbacks playlist begins to blare from the speakers. You all work quickly and efficiently, eager to close down, get home, and begin your weekends, but it’s when an old Otis Redding track that Luca decides to put a pause on the progress. 
“Dance with me, my love,” he says, offering his hand out to you as a huge gesture that earns a few looks and giggles from some of your staff. 
“Luca,” you begin to protest, looking around. 
“You can take three minutes,” he offers, exchanging a look with you this time. 
You nod, taking his hand as you agree with, “Okay.”
And as Luca wraps you up in his arms, engaging you in a slow dance to Otis Redding’s “That’s How Strong my Love is,” you chuckle, relaxing into him.
“Oh, get a room, you two!” Jesper calls out after you, teasingly. 
“She pretends – always puts up a fight – as if they don’t do this every single week,” Mathilde adds, as an explanation to Marcus. 
“Every week?” Marcus asks, a little surprised by both you and Luca’s willingness to pause and revel in a moment with each other, instead of just pushing through. 
“Yeah. Romantics, they are,” Jesper chimes in. 
Marcus smiles to himself. It’s a reminder of slowness – something he hasn’t let himself experience in a long time – and for just a moment, he lets himself settle into the feeling. 
*
You don’t even mind that you woke up an hour before your alarm the moment you feel Luca’s arms wrapped around you, and his lips against your soft skin. The low rumble of his voice resonates across your shoulders, sending chills down your spine as you arch into his hands, his arms wrapped around you. 
“I know we’re only a few days in… of our little trial,” Luca begins, the bass of his voice reverberating through your shoulder blade.
“Our living together trial?” you clarify with your ask, letting out a gasp as he nibbles on your shoulder gently. 
“Yeah. Just wonderin’ where your mind’s at,” Luca murmurs, his eager hands beginning to explore underneath the oversized shirt you put on before bed last night. 
“Well… I really like this,” you reply, the sound that comes out of your mouth somewhere between a giggle and a moan. 
“Hmmmm?” Luca sounds, innocently. 
“This… Waking up to you thing.”
“Oh yeah?” 
“Mhm.”
Luca’s name escapes your lips as his fingers gently begin to play with your nipples, his erection hard against your back as you begin to grind your hips back against. 
“And the access to round the clock sex is really a bonus,” you sigh, blissfully. 
“Oh yeah?” he asks you again, a large tatted hand slipping between your legs. 
“Yeah… I’d even be… interested in leaning into that part… right now,” you hiss in reply to his touch. “Considering you’re distracting me with sex.”
“Hmmmmm. ‘S not just it, love. Have I told you how grateful I am for what you’ve done for Marcus?” Luca asks, his mouth back on your neck. He presses your body against him, your back to his chest as he rocks his hips against yours. 
“Luca!” you protest, unable to focus on the conversation. 
“It’s your kindness. Your heart… I’m in awe of it,” he continues to praise you as the two of you begin to set a rhythm between your bodies. 
It’s all heat, and soft sighs of pleasure, and foreplay.
“Well, I know a little something about what he’s going through,” you answer breathlessly. You begin to impatiently push the hem of your shirt higher so that you can give Luca more access to your body. 
“That’s why I love you,” Luca murmurs into your skin, his hands all over you, his focus unbroken and your mind beginning to go blank. His hands are tearing your shirt over your head as he continues to praise you. “Your heart, the way you share it.”
“You helped me get there, baby,” you gasp, turning your head so that you can kiss your boyfriend. 
Instead of answering, Luca nods knowingly, before crashing his lips into yours. His mouth on yours feels like heaven, and you can’t believe that you ever fought your feelings for him. 
“Ah fuck it. Let’s do it. Let’s move in together,” you surrender to him, lost in the moment. 
“Yeah?” Luca pauses, pulling away, as if almost can’t believe what he’s hearing. 
“Yeah. I mean it, baby,” you nod, catching his gaze, certain in the way you answer. “I wanna wake up to you every morning.”
“Me too, my love,” Luca grins, before pressing his lips to yours again. “Now will you please let me fuck you, darling?”
“Fuck yes.”
Luca spends the next hour showing you just how grateful he is for you, while you in return, spend the next hour showing him just how sure you are about this decision. 
And you are sure. If mornings like this are a constant for the rest of your life, you think you’ll die a happy woman. 
You’ve found a home in him, and he, you. He’s the person you want to come home to at the end of the day. He’s the man that puts a smile on your face every single time he gets on his soapbox about how Beyonce is the performer of your lifetimes, and he is unequivocally the best, most unexpected thing in your life. 
Luca Davies, in almost a year of knowing him, and eight months of getting to love him, has somehow become your favorite person. 
By the time you and Luca are both showered and decent-for-company, you’ve begun your mise en place for brunch, completely content with the fact that you’re running a little behind schedule (and in all fairness, the sex was worth it – it’s always worth it). The smell of bacon sizzling away on your carbon steel fry pan fills the entire apartment, and you’re glad that Luca opened a window earlier. It’s not exactly window weather yet, but the air ventilation is a must when it comes to smoked meats.
While you play catch up with your brunch plan, Luca’s busy welcoming Marcus in, pouring him a cup of coffee using the extensive ten-step pour over he’s been fixated on ever since he purchased it, while they chat here and there about what else he’s explored in Denmark. 
“Been too busy working, to be honest but… I don’t know. I might wander around today… see what kind of stuff I can get into,” Marcus answers frankly with a shrug. 
“Ah, mate. We just had a walk at the Frederiksberg Gardens. Definitely something I’d recommend checking out,” Luca suggests, his eyes lighting up with excitement as he mentions it. 
Luca continues moving through his list of recommendations, Marcus chiming in with places and things he did the last time he was here, excited to spend a few days exploring the city instead of just working. 
“Wanderin’ around. I dunno. There’s something about it. ‘S good for the spirit, you know?” Luca concludes. 
“Yeah,” Marcus nods in agreement, before turning his attention over to the French toast you’re working on. “Okay, I see you. What is that? Mascarpone?”
“Yeah, good eye. It’s just something new I’m working on: a mascarpone stuffed french toast. We’re actually talking about extending our hours… maybe doing weekend brunch,” you answer thoroughly, as you dip the stuffed pieces of bread into their egg batter, pre-cook. 
“For real? That’s sick,” Marcus compliments, watching you carefully. “I mean… shit. You could have a whole brunch spot.”
“What do you mean?” you ask, looking up from your cutting board. 
“A Brunch spot,” Marcus repeats, simply, the excitement in his eyes at the new idea, evident. “Yeah, you know. Luca could do the morning pastries. You work your magic on the rest of the menu.”
“That’s a novel idea! What do you think, my love?” Luca asks, intrigue in his voice as he searches your face for a reaction. 
“I-,” you begin, looking from Luca to Marcus, then back to Luca again. “I… never thought about it like that.” You take a beat, eyeing Luca carefully. “We’ve never talked about going into business together.”
Marcus shrugs, before picking up his coffee mug, “Yo, it’s just a thought. I think you two would be unstoppable together.”
“Unstoppable, eh?” Luca asks, his eyes locked with yours. 
You only hum in response, raising a quirked eyebrow in Luca’s direction before adding:
“It’s certainly one hell of an idea, Marcus.”
Kokuore
Monday afternoon, you find yourself at your restaurant with Marcus Brooks, on a day off. 
“I might need a little extra help with something tomorrow. We’re closed tomorrow, but I want to get ahead on this special I’m working on. Could use the help of a pastry chef. What do you say?” you’d proposed to him, over one more espresso before he left. 
To Luca’s dismay, (“ you silly Americans just can’t enjoy a day of doing nothing,” he’d teased the two of you) Marcus had given you an unwavering yes, reassuring you that he was down to learn everything he possibly could from you, especially while he was here. 
And it’s true. You do need the help. But should he want someone to talk to – someone who gets it, even just a little bit – you want to offer him the space and the opportunity to do so.
“As a patissier, do you get tasked with pasta? At The Bear?” you ask Marcus, as you pleat a dumpling in hand with a speed that only comes with practice. 
“Nah,” Marcus sounds, his focus on the dumpling he’s pleating too. His concentration on getting the pleats right is reverent and unbroken, even as he answers your question. “Our head chef, Carmy, he uh… he comes from an Italian American family so when we’ve done a stuffed pasta… he usually takes the lead on that.” 
You nod in understanding, placing the dumpling you’ve just finished down on the full-sized sheet pan. The two of you sit across from each other, having pushed a few dining tables together as a makeshift workstation. 
“Think Luca’ll take over this kinda stuff when you guys open a restaurant together?” Marcus asks, lightheartedly pushing his agenda from yesterday. 
You laugh in response, your hands working quickly on yet another dumpling. 
“For someone with no skin in the game, you’re really insistent on this idea,” you tease him in return. 
“Don’t tell me you’ve never thought about it,” Marcus pushes right back, his tone still light. 
“I…” you sigh, trailing off as you pause your work for a moment. “You know, we just said we’d move in together. That and a restaurant? Feels fast.” 
“Oh shit.”
“Yeah.”
“Like… a few hours before you came over for brunch,” you elaborate, earning a whistle from Marcus. The two of you exchange a look, and a laugh, as you pick up another dumpling wrapper that you and Marcus rolled out together earlier. 
“It’s a good idea though,” you add, stealing a glance his way so that he knows that you’re serious. 
“Well, when you two inevitably do open a restaurant… I want ten percent,” Marcus jokes, earning another laugh from you. 
“Deal,” you agree with him. 
You and Marcus work like this, exchanging a few words, the conversation light, underscored by a softer acoustic soundtrack from one of your Spotify radio stations.
“So how’d you learn to cook like this?” Marcus asks you curiously. 
“Uh…” you hesitate, treading carefully as you realize this conversation could open a can of worms. 
“I don’t know how much Luca’s told you about me… but I was married… before him,” you begin, cautiously. “And… well, I learned a lot of this… a lot of traditional Japanese cooking from my mother-in-law.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. These are her dumplings actually – her recipe. She passed away last Fall and… well, it was important to me to celebrate her – to celebrate her life – by creating a few dishes for her,” you continue, and it’s as if all of the air has been sucked out of the room. “We’re bringing this one back as a special this month but um… yeah. I’m… still very much grieving and… it helps me remember her. Cooking her food helps me feel close to her, you know?”
“Yeah,” Marcus sighs, his heart heavy as he exhales. 
He waits a beat. 
And then another, having paused his work as he watches you pleat, head down, with expert hands. 
The silence between you and Marcus is full, heavy, connected by shared experience. You wait for Marcus to say something, and when he doesn’t, you decide to continue. 
“This restaurant… has so much of my heart in it: it’s got my love for Italian food from growing up in my best friend’s family’s restaurant, and it’s got my love for her – for Aiko – and everything she taught me,” you begin to explain. “And lately… it’s got a fresh perspective… inspired by the love I have with Luca, I think. Well, I know. Inspired by him… how this place brought us together.”
“The name itself is… totally made up, but means a lot to me. The Japanese word for heart is, kokoro, and the Italian word for heart is, cuore. Somehow an homage to my past… and was… Prophetic in so many ways too.” 
As Marcus listens, Luca’s previous question lingers in his head:
How’s your heart?
At the time he didn’t know how to answer, and after five days in Copenhagen – after five days of doing what he loves in a place that he loves – his heart is somehow so full, yet so broken all at once. He’s filled with deep sorrow and with the spark of creativity all at the same time, and he’s just not sure how to hold all of this feeling inside of him. 
Marcus waits a beat, opens his mouth, then lets the words fall out. 
“It’s evident. In your food,” is all he manages to say. “It’s got soul. It’s got heart. I-, it’s inspiring. That’s for sure.” 
“I made a dish. For Michael,” Marcus adds, his eyes on the dumpling he works on, but the guard on his heart beginning to fall away. “He was uh… well, he was the old owner of the restaurant, called The Beef back then. Carmy took over after he died. Felt right to honor him and his life, you know? When we reopened as The Bear.”
“Food is… it’s our art, you know?” you agree. “Sometimes it’s the only way I know how to express myself and… sometimes it’s just the thing that makes sense.”
“Yeah.”
A beat. 
“Maybe one day I can make one for my mom,” Marcus says, his voice stuck in his throat as he admits, “I don’t know if I’m ready yet. But I think… I think I’d like to eventually.” 
“Of course,” you reassure him gently. “You don’t have to be ready now. You don’t have to be ready ever. But when you are, your art will always be there.” 
“Thanks,” Marcus nods solemnly. 
You get up this time, realizing the sheet pan is full, and ready to be placed on the baker’s rack. As you return to the table with a new empty sheet pan, lined with parchment paper, Marcus finally asks you, his eyes soft, the heartbreak in them present. 
“How’d you get through? You know. Losing her? Your mother-in-law?” 
You return to your chair with a heavy sigh. 
“I’ll let you know when I do,” you answer, letting up a soft chuckle. “It helps to have good people and… from what Luca’s told me, you do. But… I had to let ‘em in, let ‘em help me. Let ‘em love me. And in all honesty, most days I’m still just… taking it day by day.” 
“Yeah, I-. I do. I got some really good people. Back home,” Marcus drags out slowly. 
“Then that’s all that matters. Your people and your heart. The rest… you just-,” you start. 
“Take day by day?” Marcus interjects, pausing to catch your eyes. 
You and Marcus exchange a knowing look, the recognition of each others’ pain is met with empathy. 
“Yeah. I think that's all we can do.”
By the end of your work session with Marcus, you’re ready to head home so that you can spend the rest of the day with Luca. 
“What’re you gonna do with the rest of your day?” you ask Marcus, curiously. 
With a sigh, and then a shrug, and a heart that feels just a little lighter, he answers with:
“Think I might wander around a bit. Someone once told me it’s good for the spirit.”
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chefkids · 7 months ago
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Hi, apparently Molly and Jeremy were spotted in Copenhagen beginning of June filming season 4. They wrapped the season soon after. Do you think it means Carmy is taking her to Noma? As some sort of grand gesture for the finale? I'm worried😭 why would they start season 3 with the recipient of the only dish that he put his own touch on being Syd and said dish ending up being the best meal of her life if they want him to end up with Cl*ire bear 🤐
I think people need to remember that Chris had three seasons of the show mapped out from the very start. Season 2 Carmy was all about being distracted from The Bear by Claire. Meaning that he knew Claire was going to be a character introduced in Season 2. If he wanted to sell the viewers on the truly being Carmy's long lost love of his life he would've started planting the seeds since season one. He planted seeds of Syd and Carmy's invisible string with the best meal she ever had comment she made to Marcus. He planted seeds about Donna's Christmas meltdown with a comment Carmy made to Tina. He knew what was going to happen in Part I, II, and III of The Bear since season 1. They are capable of writing well rounded interesting dynamic women. They chose to leave Claire as generic as they could. They chose to have their relationship in both season 2 and 3 be only based longing looks and kissing and virtually no deep conversations that felt truly emotionally vulnerable and like they led to anything.
Carmy taking Claire to Noma would mean he by some miracle gets back together with her, which I doubt she wants. She already expressed to the Fak's that she feels like it's done. But say she does get back with him. It would also imply he has regressed back to the point of continuing to impose Sydney onto Claire. Because Claire really doesn't give a fuck about Noma. And Carmy has already spent plenty of time there. It's Sydney who wanted to go there and look for inspiration.
So either Sydney will leave him and he'll find a way to convince Claire to be with him again and take her there as an "inspiration trip" and maybe in the process realize what he's doing is stupid af and that he's not finding inspiration without Sydney, because at the end of the day she is his muse now. And he'll realize he can't just keep pretending that Claire is Sydney and he'll finally stop regressing and stop using Claire as an avoidance tactic for dealing with his feelings about Sydney.
Or Molly being there probably had nothing to do with what they filmed and she as just there for fun and support. There were many others from the cast and crew there, so who knows. We'll see.
Either way I do not have doubt that Claire and Carmy will be done by the end of the series. She is not his future. She was only really seen as his past in season 3, and in Season 2 when they were in the present, she was only seen as a stand in Sydney for Carmy.
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iriswestallenn · 7 months ago
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This season was a mess
Season 1: My brother took his life and has left me his restaurant. Do I deserve this? Do I take this on? How do I navigate this grief?
Season 2: We found a shit ton of money plus uncle Jimmy is lending us more. We decide to tear down the beef and build The Bear. There is a deadline, we need to get it together, and we need to make this deadline.
Season 3: ...???? The restaurant is up and running. They are digging a bigger hole for themselves. Jimmy is broke now? Carmy is hung up on Claire. Everyone keeps bringing up Claire. Carmy and Syd have zero communication. They barely speak. Not even as friends- keep that. AS BUSINESS PARTNERS. Not once does Carmy ask why Syd hasn't signed the fucking contract that HE brought up to her. This season started off strong but wow wtf happened.
I wanna focus on two examples that I think illustrate how off this season was: I loved the standalone episodes. I cried during the Nat and Donna one. They were wonderful episodes that did not tie back into the plot because there was none. Season 2 we have a Marcus standalone right? Why did that one work whereas I feel these two didn't? (Again, I really enjoyed these episodes. This is about nothing flowing well) Because Marcus was sent to Copenhagen to become a better pastry chef. He was a cook in a sandwich place who did desserts on the side! He traveled to learn from Luca so The Bear could have a pastry chef. Woo! It all ties in.
Next, a flashback in S2 that worked. The Christmas episode. We meet their mom, Carmy brings up the restaurant idea to Mikey. We see Mikey's state of mind, we get background on Sugar's nickname/how she got it. We see how the family treats Carmy. We get a bunch of them asking Carmy if he's gonna ask Claire out. We get Richie and Tiff still together in contrast to present day Richie dealing with his ex getting a fiancé. Almost every single thing we got in this flashback related back to present day concerns. We touched so many corners. Mikey, Donna, Richie, Sugar. In ONE flashback.
Whereas, Tina's (bless her she's a doll) did nothing for the present day story. We see Tina struggle, we never get to hear the exact reason why. Does she hate this new environment? Does she wish she was just making sandwiches with Ebra? Is Carmy getting on her nerves? Sure, that could be a given but they never let her say it. We get her flashback that focuses on finding a new job, and the convo she has with Mikey. The convo is mostly about dreams, wants. I saw someone say that Tina's episode was an ode to everyone just trying to try. Not looking for a title, not competing, just trying. I agree and I love that. Why did it not relate to whatever she's going through in present day?
The rebuttal for my critiques could be, not everything has to tie in. Some things can be standalone. That's true but in my opinion... it shouldn't be done for a 40 min 10 episode show. Esp not one that tied in the flashbacks and standalone episodes in previous seasons. Why did we suddenly stop doing that this season?
This season felt aimless. Let's talk about Claire lmao when Tiff brought up Claire on that bench with Richie, I went huh??? TIFF is bringing up Claire now? WHY! I had to remind myself that she is literally a family friend they've all known for yeaaars. But me? We, the audience? We don't fucking know Claire! "She's his peace." His WHAT? When??? Stop trying to convince me of this and show me in season 1 and 2 that this woman is his peace.
If you decide to drag this Claire shit out for the entire season, oh bby, you're gonna need the audience to feel the same anguish Carmy is feeling. We should be thinking, fuck, Fak is right she is his peace because remember when she pulled him out of x y z? But at the same time they're not good for each other right now because of x y z. We have so little to go off of with these two and they made Carmy hung up on her the whole season lmaoo please.
I'll end with that, actually. You mean to tell me that the entire restaurant let Carmy act like that for months and NO ONE- not even broke ass Jimmy, told him, you need to stop. It took "Computer" coming in to get them just a little bit together? And even then? Still switching the menu, still not listening to Syd, still butting heads with Richie? You shitting me? And does Carmy know he's a fucking uncle now? DOES HE CARE? Oh fuck me this season was ass.
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