#do they sound pretty? yeah some of them
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don’t mind me, just bitching about my choir teacher
#that man. that fucking man.#he’s nice but he lies to our faces all the fucking time#he always tells my choir that we’re his favorite bc we’re actually mature and we get shit done#meanwhile#we never get to fucking do anything#like for the high school choirs there’s men’s ensemble#women’s ensemble (the one i’m in)#and vocal ensemble (the top choir that you have to audition for)#and vocal and men’s both get to have field trips throughout the year to go do stuff and perform at places#and womens?#all we get is the choir picnic that every choir goes to#and competition that every choir also goes to#we also get the most boring songs#like in men’s they always get fun songs that they have choreography and shit for#and even in vocal they’ll have the occasional fun song#but womens? nope. no dancing. no fun things.#just the most boring songs ever#do they sound pretty? yeah some of them#but they’re absolutely dull otherwise#and he wonders why we have a hard time smiling at concerts#also auditioning for vocal and vocal ensemble as a whole is kinda super bullshit#bc it’s a very biased process in favor of those with higher incomes and stable families#but that’s a whole other thing#and i’m really tired lol#anyways sorry for the rant he just really pisses me off#k.txt#vent tw
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Fuck I hate being an adult. I need a more adult adult to help with the volatile emotional situation.
#I've sort of made a new friend? Like we met at the same art group and he's also trans which was like pleasantly surprising in our small town#but like. We have Differences Of Opinion#and it's not totally his fault because it sounds like he's had a Lot of bad shit in his past that's obviously made him wary and closed off#but like. He's slightly older than me (only 4 years) and keeps blaming a load of his problems on other trans folks?#like you know the type. The like 'all these nonbinary/other identities the kids are doing are complicating shit'#the 'it hurts to see people younger than me inc. kids get hormones thrown at them when I still can't get 'em' (which... yeah not even true)#and he's told me himself he doesn't engage much with the queer community bc it's too 'toxic'#and like. I can absolutely understand why he could've had some bad experiences esp. since he has some mental health shit going on#but he wants to be friends bc he doesn't know anyone else going through the medical shit and it's like. Yeah no shit you don't?#you decided the community you'd find them in is toxic? and that people in them are doing being trans wrong?#and I think if he was just some guy online I'd like roll my eyes and ignore him#but he's a real person in my vicinity and I feel fucking bad for him#and I can see how much self loathing he has and how much that probably informs the bullshit#like he told me he thinks that trans men and cis men are fundamentally different categories and trans men will never be cis men#but not in a 'the experiences are just different and come with different perspectives way'#in like a self defeating way. Like a I just have to settle for being a trans man way.#and it made me SO SAD#like bro#I'm so sorry for whoever the fuck made you feel like you're fighting an unwinnable battle#and I want to be a friend to him. I want him to feel like there's other queer people out there and there's friends and hope#but also I genuinely could see him being the kind of person who would get really angry at you for no fault of your own#like I already get the distinct feeling he resents me a little#like obviously not too much since he still wants to hang#but he's been trying and failing to get HRT for years and I got it super quickly basically by sheer luck/a doctor who looks out for me#like I'm so fucking lucky. And I just genuinely feel like he's the kind of person who might take that personally.#I just do not think I have the fucking. Emotional tool kit to salvage this shit#But I also can't exactly text him and say sorry I don't think we should hang out so. What do.#.....I wasn't even LOOKING for a new friend! I have enough friends!!! I wanted to make clay faces and look at pretty buildings dammit!!!#now I have to be the emotionally mature one who goes hmmm maybe let's not blame other depressed trans kids for our problems buddy#I'm just gonna have to be like. Upfront about my stance and if he doesn't like it well he doesn't have to hang out with me
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this idea to me in a vision ... ive become a shrimp as a consequence from sitting at my chair but anythign for a yuu drawing🔥🔥
#re:kinder#yuuichi mizuoka#fanart#my art#shoutout to the train station for sending me this vision once i stepped in train station is the sponsor for this post/j#while doing references for this ive come to realize i need to get myself a skirt#not because i want to wear it i dont use them but i could not for the life of me find a reference in google#tbh thats on me i dont know how to google search at all😭 but it still made it so once in my life im like. man i need a skirt#i dont know how this one got to this point it sounds silly but at some poitn scribbles in the background seemed like they could make clouds#like the scribbles i did in the background seemed like they could do as clouds. so i was like yeah we doing clouds now#we doing light source thay was completely absolutely never thought of at the last minute because itd be fun#no regrets though i may not know when i last slept which is usually bad for fibro but you see#this is the one ocassion theres a balance if im not sleepign i must be making rekinder fanart because either will not mess me up🔥🔥#i lov rekinder so mcuh i could have nto slept if i didnt finish this now i cma sleep peacefully knowing i drew yuu in a pretty dress#note yes its heavily based if not straight up lolita fashion i thought yuu would look very nice in it
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one thing i really deeply wish is that i'd had access as a kid to the plural community and information that are more easily available today, instead of my first experience with plural community which both took it seriously and was nonjudgmental having been 10's era tul/pa.info lmao
#moogletalks#in some ways it was a wonderful community; and it taught me a lot of really helpful things#and made me feel validated and hopeful that This is a Thing That You Can Continue to Be and Develop in an Adult Life#instead of feeling like there was a time limit for when plurality stopped being Childlike Imagination and started being Craziness(tm)#(lots to unpack there lol)#.....in other ways not only was there Some Real Fuckery going on in the community in general; on an interpersonal basis#but i cannot overstate how horrifically toxic and damaging some of the things it taught me about plurality were#and how when i entered the phase of young adulthood where i realized the approach it had demanded of me was unsustainable to my survival#instead of having other perspectives on hand to go 'hey yeah you're not torturing your parts to death out of laziness if they go dormant'#'and/or if you don't spend hours of extremely grueling intensive work at minimum into maintaining them every single day of your life'#'and that if they dissolve into nothing because you Didn't Pay Them Enough Attention and you try to recreate them it won't be the same one'#'and if they DO actually come back as themselves they'll be horribly broken and traumatized and probably hate you forever'#'who the fuck told you that. oh my god?'#all i had to go on was 'either you're plural or you live an actual functional life in the real world; and i can't not do the latter atp'#and the result was repressing myself in an incredibly traumatic way i have just never fully recovered from even now#the fun cherry on top was that later when i *did* try to ask (very kind and well-meaning) plural ppl from another mental health community#if anything i described sounded familiar to their own experiences; or ones they had heard from other people#their response was pretty much 'idk that doesn't sound plural to me; i'm sorry; it's something where if you have it you know :('#me crying my eyes out for days afterward: obviously this reaction is bc i want to appropriate plurality to feel special#and am throwing tantrums at having the bubble broken by Reality#anyway. it's been a lot and yeah i really wish i'd had literally any other affirming plural community as a kid lol#ableism cw#internalized ableism cw#pluralitag#traumatag#adventures in mental illness#disabilitag
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Hornblower but I make him talk like this
#yeah yeah this is a rural/working class accent and he's a middle class doctor's son i know#at least it could explain the rhotic slip-ups committed by ioan gruffudd in the show#(which are my beloved btw <3 choosing to consider them conscientious objection to the most english guy to ever english)#(i know that's absolutely not what they were but listen. radical linguistic praxis makes it bearable okay)#anyways i'm sure that hornblower has *some* kentish features in his speech#they're all so mean to him about being the son of a country doctor he has to show a slight phonological coloring in some situations#but also for legal reasons this is entirely a joke#i do think it's a pretty dialect though! i like the way it sounds when i try to read the scrunkly pre-ipa here#perce rambles#adventures in historical sociolinguistics#<- making this a new tag because i feel like it's its own rabbit hole#percy yells at cecil scott
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can I coin a new term? can people start using the word 'paperphile' plz?? its like an audiophile but for people that really like paper
#mole talks#i don't wanna be the only one to say this#my parents are SUCH paperphiles they're very particular about the types of paper they use#they like paper so much their job is heavily based around paper#so i like to call them paperphiles. but they don't like it when i do that#because apparently it sounds too similar to the word 'pedophile'#which like. yeah it does sound pretty similar#but some words just sound similar? what can you do about it#if everybody in the world starts using the term 'paperphile' then it'll be perfectly normal#unless theres an already existing word that means the same thing. if there is then please let me know#i just need a word that can be used to describe people like my parents
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orv adaption announcements …………..
#good goddddddd im gonna be Such a hater about them i can feel it in my bones o(~<#i could handle a shitty live action bc im sure thats what han sooyoung would have wanted but . a Shitty Animated Show ?#i dont think my heart could take it …..#but i really really hope that wont b the case bc they can do some great stuff with it#IVE SAID THIS BEFORE BUT !!!! IMAGINE THE SOUNDTRACK ………. YOU COULD GO CRAZY WITH LEITMOTIFS… ..#imo orv isnt a story that needs visuals but it could work so well with audio ……….#translating the image of bleeding stories into whispers oughhghhgh#i wonder how adaptions could approach the ambiguity between lines spoken by kim dokja and the 4th wall ……….#it’s something that’s pretty hard to convey with audio so maybe they’ll keep it silent in the audiovisual adaptions#maybe with keyboard sounds …….. oooh thatd be so cool#but i feel like the voice the reader gives the 4th wall adds another layer to it does that make sense#pretty tricky to figure out how to translate the 4th wall outside of a medium with just text#solar-talks#god i hope they do something interesting with the starstream filter on dokja bc ill b honest i didnt like how when the webtoon got to#jihye’s scene in dark castle they just smacked sparkles on him and left it at that#ok i reread it in case i got it wrong but unfortunately . yeah . those arent eyebags you gotta make him look NORMALLER fuck offff !!!!!!!!!#i know they would never do this but it would be so fucking sick if they just moved around the features of kdj’s face ever so slightly to#give him some uncanny valley vibes#i want it so bad for the live action but i know they dont see my vision orz#they dont have to end up being Exactly how i’d imagine them im just begging the adaptions to make the best use of a different medium#put some Thought into it even ..
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Doodle of my boy
#keese draws#eternal gales#oc art#oc#fydd <3333333333#he is my bestie I need to get over my fear of drawing him so bad#grips bathroom sink I Will get better at drawing for fun and letting my art be messy and being proud of it anyways#but yeah look at him he is so cute and is so silly and he’s never gone through any traumatic events ever I would never#<- lying lier who lies and loves tormenting it’s ocs#but yeah he’s half alien half human but was raised entirely by his human mom#his alien mom is alas stuck in the cult the two met at rip#fydd doesn’t know abt any of that tho he just knows that he has another mom that his mom doesn’t like talking abt#he loves playing games of all kind but especially loves video games and will play them for hours#not that he has much else to do since he’s spent pretty much his entire life living by a garbage dump in the middle of nowhere#and he’s not allowed to go fuck around in the dump much since his mom doesn’t want him to be seen so he’s stuck at home most of the time#thankfully now he has an adopted sister to play with but he still has viddy game autism#his mom has done her best to introduce him to the various cultures she and his other mom came from but she struggles with it#she was quite disconnected from her own culture growing up and she knows limited amount about her girlfriends home planet#fydd doesn’t mind much rn cause he’s 12 but a certain other older fydd might care a smidge more#fydd does like 60% know both japanese and spanish tho so that’s pretty cool#his mom tried to do regular lessons when he was younger but wasn’t able to keep them up consistently and eventually gave up#mostly because she wasn’t anywhere near fluent in either herself and she had a hard time keeping up with how fast fydd would pick up on it#they still have some books from back then laying around that fydd will pick up and read aloud when he’s bored sometimes#he gets bored of speaking english all the time as his brain is built to pick apart different sounds and assign them linguistic meaning#so reading and speaking different languages is good enrichment for him#his mom doesn’t know this unfortunately otherwise she totally would have gotten him more stuff in different languages to chew on#he does get to learn the language the stalien cast speaks tho he has a lot of fun with that#he alas can’t properly experience most stalien video games though rip#I should rly get to redesigning his human mom again at some point she needs it sooo bad#I mean her whole squad needs it but she’s my favorite so like
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how are you feeling today? did you make it through unscathed?
Yeah I definitely didn't 😭 I've been hella congested all day and I definitely have a cough, but it's more bc my throat is bugging me than anything. I don't think I technically have a fever, my temp's just slightly elevated from where it normally is. It's fucking miserable bc I can't breathe through my nose and the damn thing fucking hurts, and I'm kinda uncomfortable and a little achy, but other than that I'm mostly just tired and a little hazy and generally just don't feel great, so I'm not dying like my partner was lmao. But yeah, all this to say that I'm fucking pissed at him and I literally feel like a goddamn plague rat 😭😭
#not snz#i fucking hate it here#I've sneezed a few times but not much#mainly just coughing#super sniffly tho#also i did go hang out with him just so i could bitch at him lmao#also i feel fucking disgusting and i was sad being in my room#like i don't want anyone to perceive me#like i was almost never sick when i was younger and if i was no i wasn't unless it was bad#but times have changed 😔#so no more going out and doing things while being either maybe or definitely sick 😔#thank god honestly but i still don't want people to Know#like don't fucking look at me let me rot in my hole and die alone#but i didn't wanna be alone apparently like i was very sad about the thought for some reason smh#so yeah we literally just hung out in the car#lowered the seats and had blankets and pillows and shit so it was kinda chill#and he bought food from a couple different places bc it's his fucking fault and he's trying to buy my forgiveness lmao#various soups and mac and cheeses and the general concensus was that they'd probably be good if we could taste them better 😭#some of them tho the texture was just not it like even a great taste couldn't save them imo#also there's a boba place that makes hot teas also so we went there a few times#ordered in advance masks on obviously so we were only in there for like a minute just to grab everything#like we were being as careful as we could#also he's like mostly feeling better like his fever broke apparently#he still sounds fucking gross tho lmao like his voice is shot and he still has a pretty bad cough#and now I'm like fucking whatever we both have the same gross ass fucking disease so it's fine i guess#but i still kept glaring at him as a first reaction whenever he decided to be symptomatic lmao#but i wasn't pressing myself against the window trying to escape so progress lmaoooo#anyway it was a chill day i guess like we were just hanging and making sure the other person wasn't dying lmao#I'm at home now and took a hot ass shower and my eyes hurt and I'm tired so it's probably bedtime lmao
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the sinus headaches are already not great but Extra Shit has been added to the pile and im just sat on that right now trying to figure out what the fuck to do
#ive uh not processed it yet and it also wont really shake out for a little while now i guess but .. yeah#long story short my friends who ive been A Trio with since we were 11 might be done with each other#theres a LOT of additional factors but theyre splitting a house share so one can go live with a boyfriend#and in the process it sounds like theyve made a lot of selfish choices for some unknown reason#ngl theyve pissed me off a little bit for being so weird and reclusive since theyve had the boyfriend as well but only with us#its ... yeah i dont know what alls happened because i dont live with them#but i just cant fathom how they got to this point quibbling over the contents of their shared house of 5 years#over a boyfriend whos been around for 2 or 3 years ..... to ruin a friendship of 18 years ????#again i dont know the whole story but i trust what the friend whos still good at talking to us to not lie about them being screwed around#i just dont get it at all how to reconcile what ive been told with who ive known over half my life#theyve felt off .. or wrong for a while now tbh ... i miss them#i havent seen the other one since before may ...#the thought that mightve been the last time we all hang out is kind of killling me inside lol#and it was also pretty weird and stilted again because it was very boyfriend-centric#this always happens to me lol ive lost count of all my school friend groups who end up basically fighting over me after they fall out#its a MAJOR trauma point for me and i thought we kind of grew past that but i guess i was wrong#ive been catching myself with a weepy eye or a single sob all day#i dont know what to do i wanna know what the fuck happened and what was worth doing this for#i wanna confront everyone and ask for a fucking explanation as to why my single life solid bedrock is falling apart#i mostly wanna dig a hole and die in it ... im fine im safe but im bothered by like ...#what a total fool ill look like if i just melt down at work ... i might find the mental health first aiders list and write an email lol#im like not okay cksbdkssj fucking hell#i have some hope but its ... its hard out here#i need to go to bed fuck#id dont neeeeed thiiiiisss im gonna choke on life agaaaiiinnn#the battle to keep my shit together enough to at least not self-sabotage ??? its testing my patience#rory's ramblings
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pro: ran into a coworker at a bar last night who I don’t really talk to usually (he works upstairs, I work downstairs) and we talked and im pretty sure we were highkey flirting and he bought me a drink and the bar merch shirt i was interested in and thanks to the power of alcohol i guess i asked for his number and he gladly gave it to me and. yeah
con: i have the second worst hangover i have ever had and have been fighting for my fucking life just to eat saltines
#it’s getting better but only now that it’s like. 6pm#as weird as it sounds part of why this sucks is that I volunteered to come into work today cause there’s a concert going on nearby which#usually means we’re at least somewhat busy -> make better tips#and I couldn’t go in because well. you know#I’ve been sick and dying in bed all day unable to move or eat or anything#let alone take the bus and go to work#but. as much as I wish I didn’t go this overboard I don’t totally regret last night cause.#yeah. potential thing going on with cute coworker guy. OH and potential job opportunity at my favorite bar in town#apparently said coworker Also has a job at the bar in addition to where we both work and the bar is hiring barbacks at entry-level#so I have someone to vouch for me and the bartender we were talking to seemed to really want me to apply too#one thing that’s kinda funny to me about all this is that the first two places (a bar then a club) we were at felt really mid because they#were packed with way too many straight people (at a gay bar and a gay club)#but the bar we ended up at (where we ALWAYS end up at. it is the oasis. it is the only thing I can rely on) felt. like. not overwhelmingly#straight? at all? I mean part of it’s just luck in a way with just who happened to be there and all that but it’s also that the staff seem#pretty significantly populated with queer ppl#I complained to the bartender about how the club we were at (one of the biggest gay clubs in the city- if not The biggest) just felt kinda#meh because yeah maybe there were some guys dancing in jockstraps and whatever but the crowd itself like. did not feel largely queer#or at least didn’t have the spirit I’d hope for in a queer space if that makes sense. felt very conventional. not enough wild outfits and#makeup and gender fuckery and so on#and the bartender was like dude I KNOW right? I went off outside there once about the invasion of cishets when this space isn’t FOR them#and so on and so forth. and god that was So real.#so the experience at my beloved bar last night was like. 1) guy comes up behind me just to order a drink but i was saving a seat for my#friend who was in the bathroom and mentioned that in case he was looking to take the seat. chatted a little. ended with him pointing out#that a guy nearby was trying to holla at me.#2) I look over and yes. the dj is. in fact. looking directly at me and mouthing the lyrics to whatever song was playing pointed my way.#it was pretty sweet honestly I think it was partly cause I looked like I was shy and alone#3) whatever gay shit was going on with my coworker and i. amusingly he seems to get more flamboyant when he drinks just like i do.#im not 100% sure what his sexuality is but i Am 100% sure it is Not straight. but yeah. if it hadn’t been so close to closing time ive been#hardcore wondering where that would’ve gone. maybe its for the best that i had to go when i did cause i was pretty drunk and who knows when#I could’ve hit the amount of drunk it takes to like outright say hey just so you know i’d suck your dick right now if you wanted
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normalcy!chase getting a ferret on impulse cuz he was assigned as a ferret furry is very on brand
og post cancelled, writing in the tags has made me decide chase is now a furry and his fursona is a ferret
he still also gets a ferret but this is more important
#ashton is talking#normalcy au#chase brody#FOR CONTEXT#chase streams on twitch basically whenever he can#and through that became acquaintances with a vtuber modeler#like you know those super cool vtubers that are more 2d but have all the different moving parts so they act 3d?#yeah they make that kinda stuff#anyways chase hits them up like 'hey could you make me a vtuber? you can get full creative freedom i've got some money saved up'#and the modeler is like 'can i make you a furry?'#and chase is like 'yeah sure lol do whatever so long as it won't get me banned'#and yeah they make him a ferret furry#and everyone in his chat when they see it are going 'WOAH FURRY'#and chase is like 'yeah sure guess i'm a furry' (/positive)#like he wouldn't actively call himself a furry#but everyone else is cool to call him one#and he uses the vtuber forever so like yeah he's basically a furry now#really gets solidified when someone draws fanart of his fursona and he uses it as a pfp#gimme a bit i'll draw this cuz this just sounds like such a vibe#furry ferret chase is pretty... poggers#god i just aged myself so hard saying that i haven't said pog/poggers in months-
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youtube
oh whoah the new noa hex demo is REALLY really good. something 11 year old warrior cat fans in 2008 would use for their emo furry amvs (compliment)
it apparently uses his attack, power, whisper, and nasal out of his 13 reported vocal modes, im so curious about the rest. you can really hear the nasal and whisper being used to good effect, and the tuners (aria and tomo in the credits) were doing some crazy shit to those breaths hes like doing 2006 alt rock vocal fries and gasping and vocal breaks.... how did they do that
#i was already intrigued because anri arcane knocked my socks clean off despite me being largely underwhelmed by orginal anri and jun#i like how exaggerated their vocal modes are. anri has so many and noa is supposed to have a billion too LOL#which i dont mind many vocal modes vs few that much. if anything i prefer a solid medium amount#like more than 4 but i dont need 13 HGJKFDLSHksd a solid 6 or 7 is nice....#but i do appreciate either way how like strong anri arcanes are like they are DIFFERENT sounding#a lot of the dreamtonics vocals while beautiful i find a lot of their vocal modes a HINT too subtle#same with internet and such. eclipsed sounds and USUALLY ahs are pretty good at making them like#really varied. but not all the time. but i like them to be varied and exagerated because like#yeah it might sound a bit distorted at 150% but 1) i like distortion sometimes and 2) most of the time ur not using all 150%#its nice to have the huge range to mess around it. get really intense with some power modes. get really raspy with some whisper modes#sound nasally as hell in a nasal mode. thats what i want. so i have lots of room to move around in!!!#especially because for me the best thing about sv's vocal mode system is how you can change em in curves.... you can slowly get more#powerful over the course of a single note. you can slowly fade into a whisper. it rules#and strong unsubtle vocal modes benefit that well#Youtube
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still thinking abt the tumblrinx i encountered a while back whose pinned post said they were transmasc… and also demanded that men dni
like—i’m not confused by the convoluted not-like-the-other-boys doublethink that gets you there, i can follow the chain of illogic just fine, but i sure am deeply wearily depressed by it!
#i know plenty of good men—good cis men even! gasp!#and i just think like. if we can’t move away from‚ like‚ cold gender war how the fuck do we move forward#fundamentally like. 100% block people who have behaved towards you in ways you didn't like.#but like. this whole thing where ~afabs~ preemptively self-victimize by conjuring up the creepiest cishet man they can imagine#and self-harm by worrying abt that imaginary guy jacking off to them#is just like. i understand how it happens but it’s like. you’re actively doing negative visualization#and‚ like‚ preemptively self-victimizing#ime it feels a lot better to move through the world unworried‚ in the knowledge that if someone says sth gross to you: you can block them!#anyway ultimately i’m pretty clearly making this post bc i'm overdue to unfollow the tirfiest blogger i’m currently following#like. yeah loads of cishet men are shitheads but ~misandry~ is so last decade#and frankly i don’t have a lot more time for the cishet women who have bought into the same system—like i have some sympathy but.#these people all get warped by the system into complementary fucked-up cogs whose teeth bite into one another#and i’m just not interested in biting back—i want to leave all the biting behind in the dust of the junkyard that birthed it#and like. i don’t want to dismiss the oppression that births this sort of rhetoric. it's super real and it's toxic and it fucks people up.#but it’s like. when people have bad dads and then are like Dads R Always Bad!!!#and i’m just over here like. i don’t know how to say this without sounding like i’m invalidating you but my dad was a fucking saint tbh#not perfect dgmw but like. a sweet gentle encouraging man who got ground down by my mother’s toxic heel along with the rest of us#so like. actually not only are you closing yr eyes to a better future‚ yr closing yr eyes to other ppl’s lived realities#like i personally managed to have a totally life-ruining mother without deciding Mothers Are Ontologically Evil Actually!#idk. obviously women remain *enormously* systemically oppressed! but surely we can acknowledge and decry that without#implicitly rhetorically closing off any possibility of a gentler queerer gender dynamic?#anyway none of this is revolutionary i’m just like. i KNOW the fascists want to cut off my toes and force me into the glass slipper#of viciously constrained femininity#that in turn makes itself feel better by sneering at men‚ critiquing other women who Do It Wrong‚ and exerting control over children#so i have strong personal cause to care about misogyny even if i didn’t care about it in the abstract#but i just think like. acting like traditional gender roles and dynamics are a fixed truth we can only bruise ourselves on#instead of a human construction that we can undermine and work to topple#is not actually the path to a healed world in the long run!#anyway. beta edition post (thumbtyped & not reread): may contain bugs.
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Have I told you guys about the fucked up dreams I've been having recently? I've been having some fucked up dreams lately. yeah <3
#sorry this is mostly about a dream I had yesterday and if I just say it it's gonna sound so creepypasta-y#like I have a lot of creepypasta-y dreams it's just how my dreams have always worked hehe#It wasn't fucked up because it was scary or anything it was fucked up because of how I felt in it#how to describe it...like I was like almost too calm and accepting of my fate#like okay previous dream context (whether this was context from another actual dream or just. lore my brain made up idk)#I got sentenced to execution. It's...really hard to describe the context without it sounding really silly.#like it was a part of some sick game that a person planned out and it all ended in a white maze room#I was told I could either choose to go free from a month and then be collected for execution or be trapped in the room forever but alive#and I chose to be executed. everyone knew. we all even had silly inside jokes about it ehe#like my friends were picking music out for it. it was really silly hehe!#but the person who came to collect me for execution was so striking. she was like. almost literally a doll#A big doll!! Like she was so so tall!! she actually shrank to be more my size as the dream went on. she was strikingly pretty#and kind. she was so kind#we walked around and said goodbye to everyone. she made friendly conversation. she guided me through how everything was going to go#god the tenderness of it all makes me sqee a lil aha. a little fucked up I think#it was self-inflicted you see. Rose bushes over a tall fence. that's why she was so tall. to help me over#I caught on pretty quickly that she was a person who decided to stay in the room instead of being executed#that's what becomes of them. they become subservient to the game master. they're made to collect the ones who chose to leave and die later#she told me that deep down she kinda wished that doing this for him would convince him to make her human again and to let her be free#I told her that it was bullshit and that he'd never do that. and she was like. yeah. but a girl can dream right?#another one of those dreams that have lines that stick out in my head as well...okay one of them was just really funny#'Hey guys' 'I'm being executed today :D' 'oh. okay!'#dhdhdh#'It's scary isn't it?' 'yeah. it is' 'Well. It'll all be over soon'#like gwah. gwahhhh#'There is something wrong inside of you' levels of impact on my psyche I reckon#me and the doll girl kissed a few times. it was weirdly quite natural. nothing intensive#but I think we both had an understanding that we weren't seeing eachother again and we cared about eachother#it was so greatly platonic and nice. yearning for something I will never experience aha ^^;#Idk if I even want to be in any sort of QPR but it was definitely nice in this dream
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Well the french in the last episode of iwtv was certainly something
#I think I needed the subtitles almost as much as someone who does not speak french. Had to re listen to some of the lines like 2 or 3 times#WHILE reading the subs to know wtf they were saying. Or am I stupid ? I'll ask friends what they think#(Not all the lines but some were hard to get for me)#Like i understand the main actors are not fluent. Not sure they even speak french cause sometimes it sounds like they dont know what the#fuck they're saying themselves. But would it kill them to hire at least french actors for background characters who have 2 lines. So that#at least the environement is believable. Like it was okay in the 1st season cause there werent big sentences in french but here..nope#also when Sam Reid speaks english with the french accent it's okay. It works honestly. I mean I think. And at least it's funny.#But in s2 having them act those big sentences wasn't a good idea. Really you can see they dont know where to put what little tonic accent w#have in french. And so it sounds fake. I mean ''ça sonne faux'' but i dont know how to translate that exactly in english. But yeah makes th#lines sound unsincere and meaningless. So the acting is downgraded. And I can see they're putting a lot of effort into it but it does#Make them sound like they're struggling hard. And we go back to the line not feeling right. Like they dont know what they're saying you kno#*I meant intonation rather that tonic accent (maybe ?) french doesnt have a lot of tonic accent(s). but both probably apply to this case)#Im only this bitchy about it cause it's a rather big production. Im pretty sure they have the resources to do better.#I know it most likely the same for any other language that was represented in the show. Or other shows for that matter. It's just that#I dont have expertise on other languages. Tho i dont remember what show i was watching where the actors spoke spanish and even i could tell#they were neither spanish nor from any latin america country. For the record i am not very good at spanish.#iwtv
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