#didnt mean for the answer to be so long whoops

[shesmore-shoebill]

i know im already too late lol lmao but!! favorite amanda outfits? favorite’non-smosh’ amangela moment? -baflegacy

hahaha technically the only thing you're late for is me answering these while tipsy, im thrilled to answer still, thanks @baflegacy :D

whoops this got kind of long bc i just kept adding stuff lol. let me put this under a cut

I went on a slightly embarassing rabbit hole to answer this question. Amanda has like. Certain iterations of outfits that I consistently find . uhm. extremely. impressive. (layering button up over tank top, high waisted pants with cinched shirt, matching blazer and suit pants with a shirt). And then my opinion gets further swayed by her hair and how much i like the video/context LOL. So this is not. an all inclusive list. at all.

Of course, Amarasha Reddit Stories outfit

tights.. the jacket.... also her hair. also this video is incredible.in general. but also. the outfit.

recency bias probably but fnaf vr outfit. i love the floral button up over the black tank top here its so good. look at it. i need it.

The silky velvety top she had in a few videos had me obsessed idk. also those few videos were really good. but the top itself? 👌

this fit. what the fuck. i love the shirt in particular but like. my god. Ma'am? Also this shirt with the choker for the youtube creators event... im.well. uhm.

i really liked this set of colors on her :]

also almost every like, button up shirt/blouse that she wears in this style makes me go 👀👀👀👀🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 (fnaf 2 shirt too)

and this jacket!! i really liked this jacket.

okay i think i need to stop.

(also i dont know if it counts but if it does. the s&b music video outfit. of COURSE. like. i mean.)

also you didnt ask this but upon reflection i forgot two angela outfits i really like: the sweatshirt from blood on the clocktower and the courdroy shirt thing from Love Is Blind 2. ok. sorry. im gonna stop now

'non smosh' amangela moment is TOUGH. Partly bc I think most of the stuff we see from them in video/photo form as a pair is in Smosh context (not to get TOO parasocial but if they wanted to. post clips or something. from their sleepovers or tv watching . i . wouldnt be opposed. .. . . .... 🥺)

In terms of completely removed from Smosh- i really liked the Fuck This Month with Jacob Wysocki :') The one with Vic was good (Vicmangela supremacy) but I liked the jokes in the first a little more. They're both really good at improv and seeing how they play off of each other (and how Amanda reaches for Angela specifically.....) really. just. :')

Also if "I Live In Your House" counts- what can I say. I love seeing them be good at what they do, and doing it together. Angela killed it on art and Amanda killed it in acting and Amangela killed. me..

In general I am just sooOOoooOooo fucking off the walls about indicators/evidence of Angela and Amanda spending time together/hanging out together/having their lives touch outside of Smosh/videos. Angela has clearly hung out with Amanda and her husband. They watch shows together. Angela got Amanda and her husband tickets to a soccer game. Amanda calls Angela when things are happening in her life.

All that said I really like the waitress skits they do bc its clearly for fun and something they find hilarious.

[silvery-bluish]

Tell us about Ars, Danny, and Ricardo? What are they like together? Does Ars act differently around Danny as they do Ric? Where do they all stand at the end of Retri?

Haha oh we’re inviting walltext. Sorry for the delay, this took me a few days to write out LOL dropping it beneath a cut bc it's pretty long.

tldr: ricardo means a lot to them and has always meant a lot to them, but theyre real bad at communicating. Daniel makes them better at communicating in some ways but they're very aware they fucked that up before it started. They're stuck in Ortega's apartment and theyre gonna implode dramatically.

Arsinoe and Ricardo have the weight of their past behind them, the 8-odd years of being at its complicate (with a break to be presumed dead) has comfort to it, Ricardo’s part of their normal, it’s like falling back into orbit when they’re near him. But there’s lots of things left unsaid, undefined, unclarified, because they felt they COULDNT in the old days and they certainly feel like they can’t now. Which is part of why they spend most of Retri avoiding him, whoops.

I think Ricardo’s afraid to push them too hard to clarify, these days, bc that might make them run again, and he wasn’t ready to push for things like publicly officially dating, in the Sidestep days. They trust each other in ways that are practically automatic at this point. They’d die for each other. They keep assuming they’re on the same page when they’re in entirely different books.

Arsinoe and Daniel sure don’t have that inertia behind them, so in some ways it’s easier to talk plainly? Daniel’s earnest bluntness and mental openness make Ars answer in kind. It's easier, smaller, maybe, for now, not as entwined as their relationship is with Ricardo, but that's safer, in some ways? They like his determination, his Decision to see the best in people.

They do have the, uh, fact that Arsinoe is So Very Aware that they fucked up his knee at the gala, because at the time he hadn't made it to the list of people they give a shit about and they'd decided that hurting him was the fastest way to be sure he wouldn't get in their way again. Whoops. This affects their interaction with him in two main ways-- they're pretty constantly worrying that they're taking advantage of the fact that he doesn't know - which is also kinda true - and they're hyperaware of not wanting to hurt him again, in a way that means they probably back off a little too fast when they're training which probably makes Daniel think they're going easy on him, sometimes?

So. They won't commit to anything real and firm and solid with either of them, because Arsinoe is very aware that the villain situation means anything they're building right now is going to inevitably fall apart except oops! car crash!! ortega knows theyre a regene and the world didnt end! Arsinoe's staying in Ortega's apartment, because it would feel like taking too much advantage of Daniel to stay in his apartment, and they don't want to leave Los Diablos to get to the Ranch, and Ricardo's apartment has been something like safe for them before so maybe it's safe now--

(They're rapidly running out of excuses to avoid talking about their relationships. I want them to villain reveal before they get anything firmed up relationship-wise, because they are-- very stressed out about building something they want and having it ripped away from them, inevitably. Safer not to name it. Probably going to accidentally imply to the guys theyre ready for a poly relationship talk and then actually hit them with the villain reveal. Sorry All.)

[pesterloglog]

Kanaya Maryam, Roxy Lalonde

Act 6, page 7777-7782

KANAYA: Thank You

ROXY: no problem!

KANAYA: I Didnt Think

KANAYA: It Would Be This Easy

KANAYA: I Mean

KANAYA: Not That It Was Easy For You By The Sound Of It

KANAYA: What I Mean Is I Thought It Was Going To Involve An Arduous And Lengthy Process For Myself To Undertake In Order To Figure Out How It Was Even Possible To Reconstruct The Orb Let Alone Actually Do It

ROXY: nah

KANAYA: Nah?

ROXY: nope!

KANAYA: So Instead Of All That

KANAYA: Its Just

KANAYA: Handed To Me

KANAYA: Like A Nice Present

ROXY: yes

KANAYA: I Dont Know What To Say

KANAYA: This Changes So Much

KANAYA: About Everything I Thought I Had To Do

ROXY: does it?

ROXY: the way i see it is you shouldnt have needed to worry about makin the thing

ROXY: i think it will be challenging enough like...

ROXY: hatching it??

ROXY: and tending to all the stuff that comes next

ROXY: isnt that basically being responsible for the preservation of an entire race of people?

ROXY: like not even a simple kinda people that all go about havin their own babies by themselves n such

ROXY: u have to set up and deal with this huge creature that does it all herself right?

KANAYA: Yes

KANAYA: Thats How It Works

KANAYA: And Yes That Will Be

KANAYA: Probably Very Challenging

ROXY: yeah so just focus on that!

ROXY: im sure you will have help if you need it

ROXY: i mean... after all this shit is over obviously

ROXY: hey speaking of which

ROXY: howd it go here? did you do the thing?

KANAYA: Yes I Think We Did The Thing

KANAYA: Our Frog Should Be Good To Go

ROXY: we?

ROXY: oh yeah karkat came too didnt he

ROXY: where did he go?

KANAYA: Oh

KANAYA: He Um

KANAYA: Hes Still In The Cave

KANAYA: Uh

KANAYA: Meditating

ROXY: meditating huh

KANAYA:

KANAYA: Yes

KANAYA: It Was A Very Spiritually Uplifting Encounter With The Denizen

KANAYA: It Really Uh

KANAYA: Blitzed Our Chakras

KANAYA: He Needs Some Time To Clear His Head

ROXY: heheh ok

ROXY: so you are roses girlfriend right?

KANAYA: I Dont Know

KANAYA: Is That What Humans Call A Matesprit When The Matesprit Is A Girl

ROXY: umm

ROXY: i dunno

ROXY: is a matesprit the thing trolls call each other when they are girlfriends or boyfriends with each other?

KANAYA: Yes

ROXY: ah ha!

ROXY: then uh

ROXY: the answer is yes?

KANAYA: Yes

ROXY: lmao

ROXY: ok it was kind of obvious i was just makin sure

ROXY: anyway thats cool!

ROXY: did you meet on ur fancy meteor vessel

KANAYA: In Person We Met There Yes

KANAYA: Originally We First Spoke While She Was Still In Her Session

KANAYA: I Assisted Somewhat

KANAYA: But I Think I Bugged Her Mostly

KANAYA: That Seems Like A Lifetime Ago Now

ROXY: so i guess you mustve gotten to know each other a lot better during the trip

KANAYA: Yes

KANAYA: We Had

KANAYA: A Lot Of Free Time

ROXY: i bet :)

ROXY: man... three years was it?

ROXY: thats crazy!

ROXY: for a whole bunch of people who only just met including humans AND aliens

ROXY: or i mean trolls whoops sorry if thats rude

KANAYA: We Call Each Other Aliens All The Time

ROXY: haha

ROXY: but then you all IMMEDIATELY have to hunker down together for three years

KANAYA: That Is Very Much What Happened And What We Had To Do

ROXY: it sounds fun!

ROXY: kinda wish i could have been there

ROXY: i guess i had my own less long stint with people in my session

ROXY: only like half a year tho

ROXY: which was cool in its own way but it wasnt nearly as... social as your scene sounded?

KANAYA: It Was Pretty Social Yes

KANAYA: But We Also Had Little Groups Who Generally Convened With Each Other More Often Than The Entire Ensemble Crowded Together For A Singular Noisy Affair

KANAYA: Such Events Were Pretty Rare So Maybe Not As Social As You Are Picturing

KANAYA: In Fact It Was Quite A Subdued Situation Compared To The Crowd I Was Formerly Accustomed To Congregating With

KANAYA: There Were Twelve Of Us Back Then

ROXY: yeah WOW!!!

ROXY: i remember hearing about that from a friend

ROXY: who...

ROXY: never even existed from this frame of reference :(

ROXY: i guess thats another weird thing about my lil sojourn to get to this point...

ROXY: it is all made of memories now that didnt even happen for other people

KANAYA: That Does Sound Like A Lonely Predicament In Its Own Particular Way

KANAYA: A Sort Of Sacrifice Youve Had To Make Yes

ROXY: yeah

KANAYA: Sacrifice Abounds It Would Seem

KANAYA: I Dont Know Of Anyone Presently Alive Who Hasnt Had To Trade Something Very Important To Them In Exchange For Continuing To Be A Material Seeker In This Endeavor

KANAYA: You Were Forced To Trade Something Too But In Return Youve Been Able To Do Something

KANAYA: Something So Wonderful That

KANAYA: I Guess Im Judging Your Accomplishment From An Especially Personal Vantage

KANAYA: But No Matter What Else You Have Been Through

KANAYA: I Believe You Can Say Youve Done Something As Important As Anyone Could Ever Hope To Do

ROXY: aw yeas 8)

ROXY: i hope so!

ROXY: i really hope it all works out and you make a super successful trollworld 2

KANAYA: Yeah

KANAYA: I Want It To Be A Good Place

KANAYA: Not So Much Like Where Im From

KANAYA: It All Sounds

KANAYA: Really Daunting Actually

KANAYA: Not Even Just The Propagation Of My Kind But Managing To Do It Responsibly

KANAYA: Just Causing Millions Of Beings To Exist For The Sake Of Doing So

KANAYA: And Dismissing Responsibility For What Sort Of People They Become

KANAYA: That Isnt Good Enough For Me

KANAYA: I Think Echidna Was Right

KANAYA: Ill Need Him

ROXY: who

KANAYA: Oh

KANAYA: Nobody

KANAYA: Lets Say It Was A Figure Of Speech

KANAYA: Ill Need Everyone

KANAYA: Whoever Is Good And Wishes To Have A Hand In The Way Our World Is Shaped

ROXY: count me in! :D

KANAYA: I Will

KANAYA: But

KANAYA: As Of The Immediate Point In Time

KANAYA: I Dont Know What To Do Anymore

ROXY: hm??

KANAYA: Before You Came

KANAYA: I Was On My Way To Join You And Rose And John

KANAYA: Feeling Quite Sure I Was About To Get Ready To Fight

KANAYA: But Then You Gave Me This

KANAYA: And Now Im Unsure Of Everything To Which I Just Imminently Committed Myself

ROXY: how so

KANAYA: I Want To Help Us Win

KANAYA: But I Also Have A Lot Of Responsibility Now

KANAYA: In A Way That Is Much More Tangible And Also Spiky And Round And Sharp Than Just A Few Minutes Ago

KANAYA: And I Feel I Have To Consider Risk To Myself Is Now Also The Same As Risk To The Future Of My People

KANAYA: Does That Make Sense

ROXY: ooh i see

ROXY: yeah!

ROXY: it is like.....

ROXY: like say a mother wolf being all ready to stand up to some other asshole of nature

ROXY: like a nasty bear

ROXY: and shes ready to fight and all but also shes got to think about what happens to her pups if she gets hurt yeah?

KANAYA: Something Like That

KANAYA: Except Id Relate More To An Analogy That Didnt Involve Weird Alien Creatures

ROXY: oh sure

ROXY: just imagine instead of a wolf its like

ROXY: a mother uhhhh

ROXY: help me out here

KANAYA: Musclebeast

ROXY: a beautiful mother musclebeast

ROXY: and instead of a bear

ROXY: its um

ROXY: a metroid

KANAYA: Lets Say Good Enough

ROXY: damn straight

ROXY: be fuckin fight of the year right there

ROXY: but yes that concern is completely understandable

ROXY: you dont gotta fight if you dont want!

ROXY: but im sure we could really use the help

KANAYA: Would I Actually Be Of Much Use

ROXY: i think so!

ROXY: id look at it this way

ROXY: none of this next gen troll stuff is even going to matter if we dont win this fight

ROXY: so we have to prioritize beating all these goddamn villains

ROXY: specially the witch!

ROXY: any extra edge is going to help

ROXY: and tho i admit i dont know much about you i am feeling prrrettyyy confident in my assessment that u are probably some sort of sick deadly bitch

KANAYA: Who Told You My Secret

ROXY: i knews it ;)

ROXY: in fact i would BET

ROXY: that you could USE your concern for all ur future space pups to be WAY extra deadlier in this fray

ROXY: maybe youd make the whole difference??

ROXY: the point is we need you now just as much as anyone in the future will

ROXY: and we are ALL riskin stuff and ALL in this together and if youre with me and rose and john, dont worry we aint gonna let anything happen to you

ROXY: i promise!!!!!

KANAYA: Dang

ROXY: dang?

KANAYA: That Was Really Motivational And I Feel Very Inspired Now

ROXY: for real?!

KANAYA: Yes

KANAYA: A Little Corny But Definitely Genuine And Moving

KANAYA: And Now Im Suddenly Psyched Again To Go Dunk A Narcissistic Fish Woman Into A Sea Dumpster

ROXY: FUCK YES

KANAYA: Not To Project Myself As Someone Fickle Or Lightly Swayed On Big Decisions

KANAYA: Maybe It Was Just A Roughly Thirty Second Spell Of Cold Feet And I Just Snapped Out Of It I Dont Know

KANAYA: But You Really Do Seem To Have A Way With Motivational Words

KANAYA: You Must Be A Natural Leader

KANAYA: I Think Your Group Was Lucky To Have You

ROXY: me?? nuhhh

ROXY: im not naturally good at that at all

ROXY: i mostly just yelled at my friends cause they were such a gaggle of frustrating bozos

ROXY: i guess im just feeling way inspired by the fact everyone is here together and we are all about to try and do something huge and important

ROXY: ive also watched john in action a bit and he is VERY good at that stuff

ROXY: hes actually so good at being inspiring hes inspired me to try and be... more inspiring? that sounds dumb as hell but is true as shit

ROXY: i also love how hes got NO IDEA how good he is at leadery stuff, its

ROXY: it

ROXY: it is so inspirationally friggin adorable

KANAYA: :)

KANAYA: Shall We Go Then

ROXY: we hella shall

[vero-niche]

UNSURPRISING AND BORING??? HAZUGSÁG! TELL ME ABOUT IT ACTUALLY!!!

(context: this ask was sent by my dear mutual after i reblogged a post about what my special interest is, which is films and filmmaking that i called those things)

fjhfjvhnfkc im so sorry for not replying to this sooner, it's been haunting me since that day bc first i was like "i will answer from desktop bc this is gonna be a long one" and then... i didnt. anyway, im just gonna start rambling and hit post at some point when i run out of steam, enjoy 💞

edit: whoops better put All That under a read more lmao

note: by movie/film i also mean animation, tv shows, anime, etc

so, it all started when i was little.... we were living mostly in a small village in northern hungary, no access to cinemas or such but my dad started working at a tv station in the capital when i was like... idk. small

anyway, he had access to The Internet and pirated movies and brough home burned VHS tapes.... i loved fiction ever since i remember and movies were no different. saw a lot of disney and other stuff, mum says i rewatched a lot of them a lot of times.... as an undiagnosed adhd+autism kid these movies were my main source of obsession.

as many in my generation, i grew to love reading a bit later after i saw the first h*rry p*tter movie and read the book but even then and ever since as well my imagination works kinda like a movie. i imagine certain shots and angles, even tho for the most part my imagination is as fuzzy as my thoughts.

also on the part of the audhd, i was basically self medicating with movies. stressed? watch a movie. sensory overload? movie (or later on, music). feeling shit? movie. it kind of works like a factory reset of my brain if the film is good. i guess because for 1,5-2,5 hours i am completely focused on one thing in a way thats not exhausting to me.

during elementary, i was in a friend group that i got in because we were in the same not school related drawing group (rajzszakkör yknow) and basically all 4 of us were a bit too neurodivergent there i think 😄 anyway, somehow when i first got a phone with camera, we started doing little "sketches" (and me with my then best friend separately too). then two of those friends came up with a short movie idea, a mockumentary about the iconic "twin towers" of the town we lived in (and hated). the 4 of us filmed and played all parts, right there in the city, and one of us edited it. it turned out quite.... well, like a shitpost lmao. so, naturally, we got quite hooked but esp me and one other friend (who is now an acclaimed theatre director btw. lol)

anyway, so we did several of these short movies + i did several sketches and other stuff with all kinds of friends in the coming years, all through about mid-high school years...

for several reasons, despite it being the obvious choice, i didnt end up going to film major at uni but chose english studies. i don't regret it, but my place wouldve been at the film major tbh....

anyway, i decided to give up my filmmaking dreams... but yknow, special interests dont wotk that way lmao.

i kept watching movies with a critical mind, such as "oh this shot is good" or "this shot is too long, they should've cut it a few seconds earlier" or "oh, they are using xy technique here" and once you start looking at movies from a filmmaker point of view, theres just no turning back (or off). i think i majorly watch anime in my spare time now bc i analyze what i see less than with live action stuff.

so like. idk what my point here is. i listen to soundtracks of movies i loved, not just the ones with lyrics but the background music too. i love rewatching and dissecting parts. after seeing a new one that i loved i headstraight to imdb to the crew and trivia section, i watch/read interviews, check box office numbers even and stare in awe when they show a special technique or smg they used.

and i mainly always thought "well i just have a passion for it but its nothing that outstanding, right? people look these stuff up when then love smg, right?" well. 😶

then not too long ago i realized im not only adhd but autistic as well. and that the reason why this passion (and need to be involved in the making) never really left, even when i myself gave up on it, is bc its my special interest.

so now im slowly approaching crossroads bc on the one hand i have a stable corporate job with good routines at home. but on the other if i dont "give in" to my special interest i feel my soul will wither. but also im sososcared 👍

in summary:

[mithliya]

Hi, I'm the anon that asked whether finding some men good-looking means I'm not a lesbian and I just want to say thank you for replying 🥺

I think I'm still kind of in that phase of tricking myself and/or gaslighting myself into thinking I'm not really a lesbian. Especially now there's that whole thing going on that lesbians are non-men loving non-men and that non-binary males and trans women are included because of that. Because before I heard that I was very happy with identifying as a lesbian. But since I didn't want to be a bigot...

Anyways. That whole back and forth was quite distressing, but since seeing some lesbian radfems I've just been trying to figure out whether that was a light form of conversion/homophobia? Sorry to dump this all on you haha. I really appreciate you taking the time to answer me. I guess I just don't want to claim the lesbian label, talk about my experiences and then suddenly go 'whoops I'm bi!' because I don't want to impose on lesbian only spaces if that makes sense. But I think I am a little more comfortable now saying that I'm (probably) a lesbian.

💖

feel free to take your time, i get how you feel and i think many of us were like that too. it took me a few years to be confident when calling myself a lesbian and i also hesitated and went back n forth a lot bc like you i didnt want to be wrong about it and i didnt want to be in spaces that arent for me. but tbh the more time that goes on, the more im sure of it and im more baffled by how long it took me to accept it bc the signs were all there since i was quite young. also i feel u on the genderist stuff putting you off of it. some of that delayed my coming out as well and ive heard the same from MANY lesbians, so rly none of what you're describing is foreign to a lot of us! good luck anon, it can be quite exhausting n confusing trying to figure out ur sexuality n be sure of ur conclusion. dont worry too much bc i assume that like me, youll also probably gain confidence and more certainty with time. there's no need to rush the answers that'll naturally come to you regardless

[magnoliasandbeardedtooth]

@heeheehoohoobeans

under a readmore cause this got long again haha whoops

disclaimer that this is not a STUDIED theory, just my feelings on the universe, and so its probably not going to encompass every detail. a lot of this game is intentionally very up to interpretation, and this is just mine

personally my feelings on how the head housemaiden describes the wish that keeps sending sif back arent as strong as what I mentioned in the first part of this post. the phrasing "broken, failing, rotting" is used in one of the comics that isat comes from, so it predates who knows how much of the game / story development. theres a chance the phrasing is very specific and intentional, theres also the chance the dev kept it because, frankly, its cool as fuck.

in accordance with this theory, though, heres what I think.

The head housemaiden clearly doesnt actually know whats happening. She doesnt notice anything wrong until the last second, and she has a completely inaccurate idea about why exactly time keeps resetting. None of her lines (that I remember) really serve to directly further the knowledge of the world and how it works. Rather, it seems like her main function is to serve as the skipping record that triggers sif's loop at the end, and to deliver lines that take on a loaded meaning with more context later.

Which is why I dont take her description of "broken, failing, rotting" toooooo literally? None of the other information she gives about the wish is very accurate, so why should that be the one thing thats correct?

What I think is happening with her is that she is very skilled at sensing craft, like how sif can sense a frozen person around the corner, or how Mira can sense everyone in vaugarde unfreezing. Theres the possibility that she can also sense some of the mechanics of the wish, or maybe even the ghosts sif leaves behind.

The wish that sends sif back in time is powered by his desire to stay with his family. The moment he talks to the head housemaiden is the moment that defines the end of their journey, and so is also the moment where he is most desperate to cling to that desire. I believe whats happening is that she can sense the craft that powers the wish begin to come together, can tell what kind of craft it is and what its going to do, draws the conclusion that its happening because the people of dormont did something to corrupt the wish (which we know is inaccurate), and in a panic, apologizes about it to sif. I think she can sense it the "first" time sif gets to her because his desire to stay with his family and the wish to make it happen are there already. He doesnt need to be insane or tortured for it to happen, this whole story takes place because it was already there to begin with.

And like a few of her other lines, the description of "rotting" comes to take on more meaning as sif deteriorates. Its not just a way to describe the fact that somethings wrong with the world anymore. As sif becomes more conflicted, it also describes his whole emotional state, and the inner conflict of wanting to give up on his wish vs his dependence on it to stay with his family.

So to answer "is the 'rotting' the wish or the universe," I think its neither. In my mind, literally, its a misconception the head housemaiden comes to, and figuratively, it's sif's emotional state, which directs the wish.

technically they are both part of the universe, but you know what I mean

edit I didnt remember while writing this whole thing that the line "broken failing rotting" is mentioned in euphrasie's breakdown, which, in the context of this theory, makes its use very intentional

in that case, I think the universe is talking about the wish. not really the mechanics of it, but its fuel, its control panel, sif's desire to be with his family, is broken, failing, rotting

I still believe when euphrasie says it, shes sensing something wrong in general and is trying her best to describe something she cant understand. when the universe says it, its talking about sif

thinking about the relationship between sif and the universe, and related theories / headcanons aka I listened to a song and I need to get these feefees out of me

this is a lot of prelude for something that can be shown with just the video clip, but I want to include all the strings that make up this knot

Its not explicitly stated, but I believe it's pretty clear that whenever sif repeats something three times while hoping for something (sharpening the keyknife, carving in general, praying to the change god statue in dormont), he is performing wish craft.

however, he doesnt repeat anything three times when getting the keyknife. he doesnt even need to pray to get it at all, the change god just gives it to him. they say themselves that they dont care for rituals. they never even take credit for the stat buff, they only take credit for the keyknife

when sif changes how they pray at the change god statue, their method more strongly resembles the ritual to make a wish at the favor tree (picking the one you like best), and as a result the buff gets better. it is the wish craft ritual that is the important part of the prayer to that statue, not the change god

one thing that IS explicitly stated is just how powerful wish craft is for those who know the rituals, and how dangerous it is in the wrong hands. between the disappearance of colors (Im pretty sure that was the result of a wish, I may be misremembering), the disappearance of the country, and the king being nearly successful in freezing all of vaugarde in time, it only takes one wish to take out massive chunks of the world at a time

we know that wish craft is very entwined in the culture of the country (the story written about in the journal is told as a cautionary fairy tale, the rituals themselves are so deeply ingrained in sif that the wish to forget the country did not restrict his memory of the rituals, and he can perform wish craft without even being fully aware he is doing it)

it seems reasonable to me that the reason for the country's disappearance was to hide the existence of wish craft and the rituals to access that power from the rest of the world. considering sif didnt even remember his culture AND had good intentions, and still nearly ended the world, seems like that concern is pretty well founded. however, thats not the important theory Im making this post about

the country has knowledge of wish craft in conjunction with worship of the universe. "the universe leads, we can only follow," "the universe willed it," seems pretty safe to say that sif's Universe is the "entity" that is granting wishes

the way wishes are described, they dont seem like something the universe grants based on who worships it. as long as you know the ritual, you get the wish. everyone is part of the universe, after all, worshiper or not

Admittedly, its a bit of a stretch to say that the universe as a collective force has any sense of empathy for human struggles. but using the change god as an example, as spiteful as they are to sif, and unsympathetic to anything other than a human's role in the concept of change, they still show a great deal of care and favor to mira, someone who loves them. it is possible for a deity to care for those that care about it

sif, despite no longer having access to his culture or why he cares about the universe, still loves the universe, very very deeply, just as much as mira loves change. the change god says that sif's deity will never answer him, but I dont think thats the case

and this is the important headcanon that I am making this post for

sif is performing the rituals, so he gets the wishes, simple as. but I feel strongly that his wishes getting granted in very small but noticeable ways, despite not knowing how or why hes doing it, is the presence of his universe helping him, caring for him, even when he doesnt remember it

the strongest evidence for this, and the basis for this whole thing, is exactly how euphrasie breaks down in act 5

at first I only really noticed when she laughs, it reminded me very much of how the change god, a being who uses sprites of other characters and has done a whole possession, laughed during their encounter. they and euphrasie are the only two that use anything other than "ha," and right after this laugh is when her breakdown pauses and she says the lines

"... Soon you'll be able to go back to your normal lives. Away from battle and strife. Finally, you'll all be able to go home!!!"

which, knowing the end of the game is coming, is incredibly relevant. very deliberate

before this pause, her breakdown seems pretty chaotic. the characters and the player are just coming out of one harrowing experience, and are clearly headed for another. the cohesiveness of this glitchy breakdown amongst a mess of the rest of the world doing the same isnt really high up on the list of priorities. none of the characters notice anything beyond the fact that reality is breaking, not even sif. it just sounds like scary nonsense.

but with the context of euphrasie being possessed to talk to sif, every single one of her lines makes perfect sense

(footage from Zhain Gaming on yt)

the universe is there its talking directly to him, it was there the whole time

the Universe loves Sif so much

[zigsnose]

have you played every LI route in twc? if yes how would you rank them?

Yes! But ranking them?? Aw man here we go :/

1. LT

I played this route first, and the emotional rollercoaster alone makes it top tier for me. But it's all the little things too... like the longing looks? The juxtaposition between how A and N show or don't show affection? A sacrificing themself for N's happiness? N's initial cluelessness and then slow realization that something is going on? Amazing. And with the bold/shy flirt options for both, the various options for when you have to choose between them, and the detective's customizable personality, it feels like there's endless ways to play this one route.

I've never seen a love triangle in a supernatural story where the two "competitors" aren't sworn enemies. A and N's friendship dynamic makes it all the more j u i c y and I'm dying to see how that whole mess turns out.

2. N

My detective is Agent Sewell's right hand arm man. She is Agent Sewell everything. She's their confidante, their best friend, their silly rabbit. Seriously, their route is such a feel-good experience. I love how quickly they can go from sweet to spicy then back again, and how they're so assured and open with their feelings for the detective. At the same time there are still things they're hiding from them, which is unexpected and adds another layer of complexity to their character.

(And Nat in particular is just 🥺🥵🥰)

3. M

Dumbass (affectionate). Absolute hornball. Pairing them with a detective that's the exact same way, or complete opposite, is super fun to read. I really like their gradual development from rude and uncaring to soft and loyal, and how they don't even know what it is they're feeling yet, but don't attempt to deny it or push it down (except for that bakery scene in the last demo but nvm).

10/10 can't wait to see their aha moment.

4. A

A is legit the endgame in my main playthrough but their individual route is so frustrating lol. Playing the LT first kinda skewed things for me because I placed most of the reasons for them holding back their feelings on their friendship with N, but I understand now that they have a lot of other baggage that has nothing to do with N. In most slow burn romances I've read, the other character's hangups are known upfront or revealed early on, which makes the wait more tolerable, so not having the details yet is hard.

Their route is like the written form of the "trust nobody, not even yourself" meme and I'm looking forward to when they finally put the gun down 😔

5. F

Listen, friends-to-lovers is an awesome trope and I'm usually here for it. I think all the angsty-angst from the other routes spoiled me for this one though. I was missing a lot of the drama in their route, but I also get that it doesn't need it. Characters can like each other without there being some major obstacle in the way, and I think that's what makes this route special, as well as necessary since the other routes already provide plenty of drama for those who want it. That being said, some parts of F's route didn't hit with me, and I definitely need to replay a few more times to narrow it all down.

I do like that even though F is the most overt with their feelings, you still get to see them be nervous around the detective. The fact that all they wanted was to be chosen, and for the detective to be happy had me saying "awww!!" out loud, multiple times. Overall, I just really appreciate F as a character and the levity they bring to the unit. I hope they and the detective get to stay happy and nothing bad ever happens to them again, because it's truly what they deserve.

[everyfandomever]

Ugh

[myfriendthedictionary]

i loved the new chapter of All Eyes On Me!!! as always i laughed all through it! Clark and Eva friendship is probably one of my favourite platonic dynamics, and the way you write them is really good! also, Eva spending two years pinning over Kate and not having ever had a conversation of more than twenty words with them has peak hopeless queer vibes and i love it. can't wait to see what you come up with next!!

- happy stim anon

yay!!! im so glad you liked it!!!!!!! <333 it makes me so happy to know ^^ also aadskjasdkj yeah..... for some reason, i just cannot imagine a scenario where eva makes the first move. i think she is just oh man... pretty,.............. nice.......,,,,,, but thats also maybe me projecting lol ,,, kate also has this energy so genuinely idk how they actually ever got up the courage to ask each other out in any dynamic lol!! 

clark eva friendship rights,,, they are just so funny to me. pov u are the only two people who are vaguely responsible but even u have no concept of what the heck your friends are doing now

thank u so much!!! 

[rudeboimonster]

yells from the bg (i know no one cares specifically) but

look with all the teasers i just thought they were gonna announce another like anniversary thing or whatever, i know they put out a greatest hits album recently so i havent really been paying close attention (i. didnt want to get my hopes up)

ANYWAYS to answer!! the original question! i missed a bunch of that livestream but I got to hear (double checks notes) Emily Armstrong for at least some of it and she seems to really nail a lot of the performance!

i'm. nervous to listen to the new single. probably a lot of fear of just, change yaknow. i should probably at least hear it out, i'm sure i'll probably enjoy it to some degree.

the following is me having just. a lot of thoughts about linkin park and my history with them and it was getting long whoops

hand motions. but then there's other things i'm worried about. like i mentioned earlier, Shinoda was peddling NFT's SO FUCKING HARD in like 2020-2021 last i checked, and then iirc they used generative ai bullshit to make the music video for Lost, right? and it looked like FUCKING SHIT. yeah okay looked it up, it was gen ai, which. dudes. what the fuck. i'm sure there's other things they've done in the past that could've been like """cancelable""" or whatever and I just didn't know or didn't know better, but then it makes all the like, fundraising and relief effort stuff they seemed to put a lot of energy into like lip service? but then again, how much of the stuff I oppose was something pushed by, yaknow, shitty warner brothers record label meddling? but then how much did i like was also then something that was just a record label mandate?

scratches head. iunno. part of me wants to be excited, of course. im... basically a gay guy* (*it's more complicated than that) because of my intense love for Chester. i have his signature tattooed over my heart for fuck's sake, and i got it done on his birthday! my ass dissociated for a whole calendar year when he passed and i swear like people who hadn't talked to me in years reached out to me when he passed bc literally everyone around me knew how much he mattered to me. and like, i missed out on seeing them perform during The Hunting Party and Living Things tours because I couldn't afford it at the time (+was into other things during THP) so that means the last time I was lucky enough to see Chester perform was 2011 during A Thousand Suns. part of me wants to try to get back into them, make sure i see them perform again, but iunno. iunno...

overall, Emily's hitting it out of the (linkin) park! (look i had to do a dad joke, like, legally)

just some other factors surrounding the band, my own emotions, and a shifting of my own taste makes me hesitant to be... overly optimistic? I like, wanna be excited, but there's something that's making it difficult. on one hand I've also been struggling to enjoy a lot of things lately and i think that's a lot of me having. many problems i'm working on.

lots of thoughts! lots of emotions! i really fucking hope the band, now that its doing more things purposely, fucking quit the ai gen bullshit and i hope shinoda's kicked nft's to the curb. sighs. i guess i should go check on that. if they don't, that's gonna super sour the taste of anything they do afterwards for me, ngl

ey what's your thoughts on the recent linkin park news? like, the new vocalist n all

SITS UP FROM BEING HALF ASLEEP

I FUCKING FORGOT THE LINKIN PARK NEWS THING WAS HAPPENING TODAY THEY HUH

[juuheizou]

🔥

not every villain needs to be sympathetic. its the pattern that ticks me off, not the individuals, and obv individual content creators can do what they want, but I am really sick of looking for writing tips and the biggest pointer i get being the exact opposite of what i’m trying to do w my characters and therefore useless to me. like every fricking piece of writing advice i look up in regards to writing villains says to give them as much validity and depth and yes, sympathy as the heroes (which is how i know this opinion is unpopular) but… that’s not how life is.

i mean, look at genocide, imperialism, class struggle, just abt every major atrocity in history. a tiny percentage, if any (tbh im just avoiding absolute statements bc i am not a history expert by any means), was done by some traumatized individual with a messed up past to explain why they tortured thousands of people or attempted to kill off an entire culture. the motive is always entitlement, dehumanization (as in the ability to dehumanize others, not being dehumanized themselves), things you learn from being the one on top all your life, not from marginalization or trauma. 

i’m not saying there has never been an abuser who was abused themselves or a murderer whose tragic backstory played a part in their decision to kill people, because that would be false too, but that doesn’t mean every single person who does something terrible has a heartbreaking motive for people to sympathize with. otherwise, most serial killers wouldn’t be white or male (quick side note, further down that source is a breakdown of common motives for serial killers and spoiler alert, some do just go and murder people for enjoyment).

anywho, this probably turned into more of a rant than it needed to be despite being v shallow in going over why it ticks me off that every damn villain (or not-good guy) needs to be someone the audience can sympathize with these days or else it isn’t down to earth or realistic enough. again, individual content creators can do whatever the frick they want with their work. it’s theirs and there is a place for sympathetic villains (and on a larger scale, grey morality) done right. 

but when every single one is given an attempt at sympathy for fear of otherwise making the universe black-and-white or unrealistic, the result is usually portrayals of trauma that are in horrible taste and end up supporting the stereotype that survivors of traumatic events are violent and more likely to hurt other ppl, when in reality, they are much more likely to be victims of violence than be violent themselves. 

and no, fiction is not reality in the sense that killing off a character in a piece of fiction is not the same as murdering a real person, but media we consume does have a real effect in shaping our perspective, so how real issues (or even parallels and allegories to real issues) are written in fiction MATTERS. apparently that’s a controversial statement on its own nowadays and i’m wondering how whoever decided that thinks stuff like propaganda works, but that’s a another point for another time.

so anywho, i’d love to not see so many writing tips that call my villains who have never suffered, with simple motives, who just think that certain people are beneath them and therefore it is okay to hurt them, unrealistic. because that’s how most real-life villains are (not to mention how the ppl who have made ME as an individual and ppl LIKE me throughout history suffer) and the trend of reflecting some parallel reality in every piece of fiction made for anyone over the age of seven (like it’s a requirement for Real, Deep fiction for Mature audiences) where that isn’t the case is getting so tasteless, imho.

thank u for the ask ilysm!!

[russilton]

Hello, seeing all of the redbull au stuff on my dash again has me wondering! I know that Alex/George’s relationship is going to be different from what you have said but what about George’s other friendships? Is he still friends with Lando or Charles? Is anyone in his corner? I don’t know you opinions on Lando but I always think that the Lando/George friendship in fanfictions is really sweet! <3

Just curious :)

I have like eight asks about Zandvoort and strategy to answer…. So I wrote this up instead! Come get y’all Red Bull AU juice!

Red Bull au masterpost

Long ass post (2.4k whoops) and Red Bull George AU Spoilers under the cut

So I was kinda umming and ahhing on how to phrase this answer so I’m going to try and split it into his relationships per driver. This obviously isn’t all of the grid. Not even I can manage to go into that much detail (trust me, I tried)

But first an overall summary: Redbull George doesn’t have friends. By choice. He’s not like our good real boy George; sweet, well rounded, friendly. His entire life is the race track. He doesn’t date, he doesn’t twitch stream, he doesn’t golf. When he’s off the track he’s training, sleeping, or just keeping to himself. Redbull expects perfection, if he wants that seat (and he’s never wanted anything more) then he has to show up and ace every single race to the best of his ability. Like many abusers, they isolate him on purpose. Without a support network there’s no one to tell George to leave.

He did briefly have some fairly close friendships within the red bull academy, but they fell apart for various reasons.

Pierre

George and Pierre were briefly friendly back in 2017 when he was still at Torro rosso and George was driving in GP3. They mostly only interact through the team, but pierre knows how to be friendly and George is still a little in awe of the whole f1 thing. When Pierre is kicked from RB embarrassingly in 2019, George is sympathetic… but he wants a seat. He’s won his rookie gp3 AND f2 series, and frankly George thinks he’s more than worthy of the seat, he’s more qualified than the other juniors. But when he and Alex drive TR together in 19, and he backs off Alex more than once, as his friend, more about that later. Pierre will have been shamed by marko and co about people who can potentially replace him, and George would have been shown right up there arguing why he should have it over Gasly. Gasly is hurt and avoids George out of anger and some betrayal. George feels bad, but that’s the cost of racing.

Alex

Alex and George have been close for a long time. Both brits, both fighting hard to get where they are. Alex is a little older than George and for a long time he’s basically George’s only friend in the sport. When it comes for Alex to take Pierre’s spot in RB George is… disgruntled but accepts it. He feels selfish for thinking he’s out performed Alex, but there’s something that sits annoyingly in his gut when helmut tells him they chose Alex bc he had a spark George didnt. George expects Alex to come to his defence, say that George was just being a good teammate, he’s not soft. But Alex says nothing, too scared of the embarrassment of following Pierre’s horrific exit with his own. However understandable, he hangs George out to dry. And George realises that when it comes to getting into RB’s seat there are no friends.

Which is exactly what RB wants, it wants ruthless drivers and doesn’t particularly care if they get on, think Seb and Webber. When they see George’s withdrawal from Alex is making him harder and more serious, they know to encourage that. That means keeping Alex for 2020 even when George has been far more consistent. A 3rd seat switch in 2019 makes them look disorganised. And Alex isn’t bad. In order to cultivate George’s ruthless distrust, Alex gets another year and George is told they need to see more from him. At that point their friendship is dead in the water. George’s sole focus is his race craft. Alex is too busy buckling under the RB pressure to care how George feels. They’re walking directly into abuse 101, red bull intentionally separating them from friends and family, only letting them focus on racing.

Max

As much as it pains me to say, Max and George are friends for a while. They aren’t close by any means, it’s closer to work affiliates. But Max is at least somewhat cunning, and he knows that RB are sizing George up for the seat with him, and it will benefit him to make sure George is on his side early. He and George don’t exactly hang out outside of work, but on race weekend if he finds time to speak to George during driver parades and press conferences, that’s his business. When he sees what George is doing with the AT car, and looks to see how Alex is following the same route as Pierre, he makes sure to hint to George that if he keeps those performances up, the 21’ seat could be his. Max thinks George should be a lot more impressed with him than George is. A lot of red bull juniors see max as the blueprint, hired young and lorded by his team, but George just sees him as competition. They’re politely friendly till George is well settled in the RB seat, it’s good PR after all, but as George becomes a threat to him Max is less and less okay with George’s lack of awe. When George is ignoring Max’s praise in order to go and bother Lewis, then starts to threaten Max’s points total, that’s a problem. He doesn’t directly suggest red bull breaking George, but he sure as shit doesn’t stop it, that little British queer should get in line, Max has a championship to win.

Yuki

I kinda forgot about Yuki for a while. I can't lie, because he’s not so easy to fit into the red bull villain team narrative around George, and because I can’t hate Yuki. He’s just a lil badass dude! But I think I’ve settled on George not really thinking about him much? This isn’t to be mean to him, George is just utterly focused on his seat. He’s seen the churning of the RB junior program himself, yuki will either sink or swim in the AT sea. If he sinks, it’ll be a shame, the guy seems nice, but it’s not George’s problem. If he swims, then he’s a threat to George’s position, and George will have to eye him carefully. I’m not kidding when I said the RB atmosphere is toxic.

By the time George is taking his own rose tinted glasses off, seeing how the team is crumbling, he worries for Yuki. Pierre is looking around at getting himself out, as is Alex, but Yuki still wants George's seat. George doesn’t feel like he knows him well enough to warn the guy, but when he leaves he catches Pierre’s eye. There's still a lot of unspoken apologising to happen between them still, but George hopes Pierre will warn Yuki.

Norris

Lando… look I won’t lie, I am not a massive fan of Lando irl and that affects how I write him, similar to how I am with Max or Perez etc. I used to like him under pure British bias, but with the way he acts around George, his laddish banter personality and the fact he writes for a Terfy Tory paper… I’d just rather not have anything to do with the guy. He may be able to ignore how the paper treats trans folk but I don’t get to. So fuck that.

George and Lando are friends for a while. Shared nationality and the fact they’re often competing in the same series mean George and Lando are around each other often. It’s sort of like how you are friends with guys in highschool you stop talking to as soon as you go to uni because most of your friendship was based on proximity. When George gets into the RB junior program, he has to get serious, and Lando mocks him for it. George shakes it off as Lando being Lando, but then they’re competing in F2 and Landos barbs get more and more jealous and pointed. George doesn’t have time for it, if Lando wants to be bitter George is kicking his ass, that’s his problem. He doesn’t have time to humor Lando saying he has a stick up his ass for RB, nor his jabs at George’s choices to eat salad to stay in RB’s weight limit when he gets to eat burgers. Poor Alex is stuck between them, and eventually gives up on trying to make them get along. George beats Lando to the F2 championship and they stop talking.

Other rookies (Charles, Nicky, Lance, Esteban, Mick etc)

George doesn’t really know any of them well, and doesn’t have a reason to change that. He doesn’t stream, he doesn’t party much, he doesn’t relax with other drivers. He’s politely cordial with all of them but doesn’t really seek them out as friends. George is… aloof at the best of times too, most of them have seen him change with his junior signing and leave him to it. George is a fuckin dick to get past on track but never outright dangerous, he’s confident but not mean to the press.In a sense George is very isolated in a way nobody really notices because why would they?

2022 - Mercedes George

Sebastian and Valtteri

When George goes to Merc, everything changes. The only thing he has to come with him is Lewis. But Lewis introduces him to new people, and those new people sort of reintroduce old ones.

Mainly, Bottas and Vettel, both Lewis’ close friends, drivers that the year before George had considered it important to beat. Seb is Red Bull's prior golden child, George measured himself up against Seb often. And Valtteri is the person George was hired to beat, he’s a little ashamed to think about how often he looked down on Bottas, who did end up beating him in the championship standings anyway. Both of them are also, as mentioned, Lewis’ close friends, and they welcome George with open arms. It’s not exactly a hug-a-thon, but Valtteri is grounding and protective. He gave Lewis the blessing to bring George to Merc and George is aware of that, he almost expects Val to lord it over him, or be bitter, but Val is neither. Instead he’s quietly supportive, he takes George to the side when he visits Lewis and helps George learn the names of his new engineering team, people Lewis doesn’t even necessarily know well. In the paddock he’ll quietly put himself between George and Red bull team members. It’s ridiculous, he’s so much smaller than George, but it makes part of him feel a little safer even if he doesn’t want to admit it. George often feels so alone without Lewis around other drivers, he spent so long coldly avoiding them, now he feels slightly outcast in this new threatening black race suit. He can’t help but read into how they look at him, or through him. But Val gives him a friend, even if he teases George about his bambi legs and willingness to sleep with Lewis Hamilton (Val has seen Lewis in the sauna, he’s not sure if George is brave or insane for willingly taking that)

With Seb, George isn’t as close as he is IRL, at least at first. George isn’t part of the GPDA, though he may end up taking up that roll later in the au, and he avoids Seb on track because it’s all he can stand to hear some days about how much Christian misses Seb, Sebastian is the boots they want him to fill, and something in that makes his back itch. When he leaves Red Bull, he wants to ask Seb about it. If he knew how bad it was. In the end seb finds him, sits down next to George and asks him how bad it was. Lewis had let hints through but George’s trauma is his to tell. When George tells him, Seb nods, and tells George the team has changed. There was something good in them, a long long time ago. But Seb had been offered George’s eventual seat in 2020, before he signed with Aston, and even with an improving car he could tell something wasn’t right with them. He ended up turning Christian down of course. He muses to George that his gut was right, and he wished he could have warned George back then. George points out he probably wouldn't have listened. They laugh it off, but in the end George finds someone to talk about Redbull with, in a way that Lewis and Val don’t get. Seb also tells him teasing stories about Lewis that Val pitches in for, and it makes George’s gut roll happily to hear them.

Slowly George tries to mend some of his old friendships. It’s not smooth sailing by any means, he, Pierre and Alex have a lot to work out. But at the same time, shared trauma bonds guys, and Lewis encourages George to spend time with them when he’s comfortable. Lewis comes a lot too, he gets on with Pierre and Alex is nice enough, if it helps George relax a little, it can’t hurt.

With those two come a lot more possible new friends. Pierre introduces George to his Boyfriend Charles, Charles brings Mick. Alex brings Nicky, who is friendly and laughs with George. Val and Seb bring their friends and teammates, Daniel, Zhou, Stroll and nyck, who in turn introduce him to Esteban and co. It’s not easy, George doesn’t fall into buddy-buddy with them, he’s still George. But he can joke with them during race weekends, press conferences are a less hellish endeavour. They invite him to things and sometimes he even goes. He’s still learning to manage that part of him that distrusts all of this, tries to learn to separate drivers from the track.

If I were to guess who George ends up closest to, it may end up being Pierre. It’s not my normal choice necessarily (nothing against Pierre, I just think Williams George is closer to Nicky and Charles) but in this au they’re both a little weathered and haunted by RB. Pierre is calmer than a lot of the other young drivers, it makes George feel less jumpy and nervous, and his dry wit matches Georges own. Besides, when there’s an awkward silence, one of them can make a joke about some weird shit Max used to do and share a laugh.

(Additional note: I’ve decided it’ll probably work best if Georges physio at RB is hired by the Team. He returns to and rehires Aleix when he moves to Mercedes’ and they make it clear he’s free to hire who he wants, much like Lewis hires Angela not the team)

[oscar-lettjohanssonloveme]

A Real Family (Miss Venable x reader)

hiyaa :3 This was a really cute request, thank you! Its kinda short i guess, but there we go..

request: (by anon) Hey hi, may I suggest something where reader and Wilhemina have a doughter, and one day she comes at home after school crying, because some kids made fun of her because she has two moms, so they have to comfort their doughter, and Mina, at first, wants to call the kids parents and shout at them, but reader will calm her down and make her change her mind. 👉🏻👈🏻

google translate whoop.. ohh and i guess the end is a bit sudden, i am sorry ://

"What about Levi?"

"We can't call him Levin while we always call Olivia Liv ... Levi and Liv sound ugly together .."

"Then suggest a name if you always find my ideas shitty ..".

You sighed as you leaned back to lean your back against Mina's upper body. It was Wednesday afternoon and you were sitting on the couch in your girlfriend's lap while you discussed the name of your second child who was already on the way (you were five months pregnant).

Mina was sitting behind you and had both hands on the round curve of your stomach, while absently stroking it with her thumbs.

"What about Theodore?" She finally asked as she rested her chin on your shoulder.

"My cousin's name is like that. And I don't like him .."

"Okay", she muttered thoughtfully. "And what about Benjamin?"

"Mhh....", you hummed. "Liv and Ben, that sounds nice."

"I seem to be good at choosing my names", Mina said softly and gently bit your earlobe.

"Olivia was my idea too.."

"No way!" You shouted loudly.

"It was my idea! Dont you remember? It was 4 o'clock in the morning when I had the idea of the name and then I woke you up and-"

"The name you woke me up for was Samantha..", Mina interrupted you and you could see in the corner of your eye how she smiled smugly.

You shook your head.

"Samantha was your idea! You-"

The ringing of the doorbell interrupted you.

"That's Liv..", you squeaked excitedly and pressed a quick kiss against her jaw before you jumped up to run quickly out of the living room.

You heard Mina laughing behind you.

"In your condition you should stop jumping around like a monkey."

You just rolled your eyes at her words and opened the front door to greet your daughter beaming with joy.

"Hey baby, how was- What the hell, Liv ??"

You looked confused into the sobbing face of your 8 year old daughter.

"What happened? Are you injured?", You asked desperately and crouched down to examine her for injuries. She was unharmed, thank God.

You brushed the red strands of hair from her tear-stuck face.

"Please talk to me, Liv..No matter what it is, I won't be angry .."

"T-they said our family is not real .." your daughter sobbed.

You frowned.

"What do you mean baby? Who said that?"

"And they say that you are sick, because you are lesbians ..", she continued to cry and you uttered a soft "Oh" when you suddenly understood what she was talking about. You looked sadly into her y / e / c eyes. One of your biggest fears became true.

"First let's go inside .." you mumbled and took the hand of your still crying daughter to go inside with her. In the hallway you took her backpack and jacket to hang on the wardrobe.

"What happened?", Mina asked worried when she limped into the hallway and saw Liv crying.

"Mommy, I don't want you to be sick .." Liv sobbed and ran to Mina to hug her legs. Your wife looked down on Liv in confusion, as she put her hand on her head and stroked her red hair.

"Sick? Baby what are you talking about?" She mumbled, looking desperately at you, who was staring at the child with concern.

"Okay Liv ..", you finally said when you walked over to her and took her hand again to walk into the living room with her. You sat on the sofa and Liv instinctively climbed onto your lap without injuring the baby.

"Can you please explain what's going on here?" Mina hissed after she sat down next to you.

"Liv baby, just tell us everything that happened .." you cooed gently as you started to play with the loose strands of hair, that had fallen out of the hairstyle Mina had done for her that morning.

"Uhm, today we had to introduce the family trees that we made ..", Liv began hesitantly.

"And then?"

Mina still looked confused.

"The others thought it was weird, that I have two mothers and said that we can't be a real family, because I don't have a father. And you can't have children without a father. And they said that you both were sick and going to hell .. But I don't want that!", said Liv excitedly.

For a few seconds you looked down sadly at the child in your lap, who had puffy eyes from crying.

"Oh baby .." you sighed.

"Of course we are a real family..Look!"

You pointed at the photos on the mantelpiece with your fingers outstretched.

"On the photo on the edge you can see me 8 years ago when I was pregnant with you. There's a photo of Mommy and me at our wedding next to it. And here you can feel your little brother ..", you muttered and grabbed her little hands to put them on your stomach.

"Mina and I are so happy together and we love you so much. How could we not be a real family?"

"B-but why did they say you are sick? ", Liv stuttered as she stared down at her hands that were on your stomach.

"Well .. you know, it confuses them, that you have two mothers because they don't know it any other way. Do you remember,  when you slept at Jennys House for the first time and how confused you were when you met father?" You asked and Liv nodded.

"It's the same for them. It's not unusual to have two moms anymore, but having one mom and a dad is still what most people know. You know, there are even children who have two dads and no mom at all and they are a real and happy family too."

Liv looked at you carefully.

"Really?" She asked, and you hummed in agreement.

"The only important thing is, that we all love each other okay?”

You smiled gently at the child in your lap and watched with satisfaction as she nodded.

"Who were the children who said that to you?", Mina suddenly asked and you had to frown when you saw how angry she looked.

"Uhm..Brian and Melinda.." Liv muttered.

"Brian? The ugly one with the glasses?"

"Mina!" You shouted, staring at her reproachfully.

"M'sorry ..", she replied curtly while still staring expectantly at Liv, who nodded shyly.

"Okay then, excuse me for a minute.." Mina mumbled and got up to leave the room.

"What are you doing, honey?" You asked confused  and you looked after her. When your girlfriend didn't answer, you got scared.

"Is everything okay again, Liv?", You looked nervously at your daughter, who nodded in agreement

"Well, do me a favor and go to your room to play, okay?"

Liv jumped off your lap after kissing you on the cheek and ran out of the room and you could go after Mina.

"Mina, honey?" You asked when you came into her workspace and saw Mina with the phone in her hand.

"What's that supposed to be?"

"What does it look like? I'm calling the parents of these kids.." she growled while angrily pressing the buttons on the phone.

"You shouldn't do that .." you said and quickly reached for the phone to take it from her hand. Mina raised her head to you and glared at you.

"Give me the phone, Y / N! It's not fair, that we kept telling Olivia that all people were equal and raised her up that way, just to get some kids to talk her out of it. And besides, imagine Olivia would have asked further questions, because women actually can't have children together, thats a fact. We would have had to explain the whole thing with the sperm donation to her right now, just because a couple of parents couldn't raise their children properly. This is unfair and you know that!", she scolded and clutched her cane tightly in both hands.

"Honey, let me call the children's parents...they are nice people, they will understand..." you tried to appease her and put your hands on hers after you put the phone on your desk.

"They told her, we weren't a real family .." she croaked hurt.

"I know, honey .." you mumbled sadly and rubbed the back of her hands with your thumbs. "But thats are children, they don't know any better ..".

"You know, when I was as old as Liv, I was bullied about my scoliosis. I don't want her to go through the same thing just because of us, her family. I dont want her to end like me.."

You looked confused into her injured eyes, in which tears glittered.

"To end like you, honey? What do you mean?"

"I mean my attitude towards people ..", she growled and looked away from you.

"Oh Mina .." you sighed and put a hand on her cheek to force her gaze back to you.

"In case you haven't noticed yet, Liv is already much more like you than you think.. And by that I mean your positive qualities. Olivia is just as smart as you and has the self-confidence that you have today, but that you didnt have, when you were 8. She can handle it and as long as we don't give her the feeling that something is wrong with our family, everything will be fine.

It will certainly not be the last time that we will be confronted with something like this, especially now when Benjamin arrives soon, but together we can do it.. "

Mina looked at you thoughtfully for a moment before slowly nodding.

"Maybe you're right .." she muttered and you smiled gently at her.

"I'm always right .." you teased her and before she could protest you pulled her close to kiss her.

[cicada-candy]

"Robbie doesn’t know who he is trying to convince – himself or Gabe’s shift teacher. Mrs Lai has the expression of someone who has had to sit enough children through conversations like this. He catches her glancing towards the box of tissues on her desk. Her eyes are dry."

oh wow they uh. they lose a lot of people in demon attacks. and those people have. kids. who have teachers. mhm. yep. ow.

"When he doesn’t answer for long enough, Mrs Lai nods to herself, one sharp movement like she’s putting a decisive dot at the end of a sentence."

they lose a lot of people.

"See, another benefit. Rangers don’t have to worry about security. Yeah. They only have to worry about catastrophic brain damage. The only type of brain damage worth having, if you think about it."

oh okay Why. Would Eli Notice That Specifically. i mean. i fuckin know why coz hes a mean with very high-up friends ("friends")

"It’s like going through the motions, even though he’s never seen one of these suits up close before. Or maybe it’s just not that hard to figure out. Like in the academy, he has the vague sense of what to do next, and next, and next, and it all breaks apart if he thinks about it too hard, so he lets the instinct drive him forward in an unknown direction and hopes it will all turn out alright in the end.

Did he watch his dad suit up at some point? He must have"

something about Robbie repeatedly attributing Eli in his head to memories of his dad is Heartbreakinggg and god knows eli might use that deliberately later but hnnngh :((( poor kid just wants Anything

" “There’s still a few of us around from the good old days, yeah,” Canelo slaps his massive hand on Robbie’s shoulder and pulls him to the centre of the room. He makes ‘good old days’ sound like a curse."

ohhohohohhoh theres still 👁️👁️ people around from the first run 👁️👁️

"When he looks, Cho gives them a thumbs-up from across the room. He always looks three coffees past bedtime, but he’s been extra jittery today. Even now, he’s gesturing around the screens with an open can of an energy drink and the tech next to him might brain him with her power tool if he spills anything."

damn he just like me fr

also yk be careful or Be Concussed yk

"Killjoy."

Eli ur lunacy is showing

"Robbie does his best to cooperate with the techs, but he hates being prodded and he hates people looking at him, and rather quickly he finds himself hating the way the circuitry against his skin heats up when the switches get flipped. You can feel that? Shouldn’t he? Is something already going wrong?"

OHOHOAHDASHKJASHDUOWH YESSSSS WE ARE INTO QUESTIONABLE ANATOMY ALREADYY LETS GOOOO

“You’re gonna be alright,” he says, sounding as confident as usual but with a very different set to his eyebrows. “I will see a seizure coming before you even get a tingle. We’re not taking any chances, we’ll pull you out the second there’s a blip on the radar, okay?” He puts his hands on the shoulder guards on either side of Robbie’s neck. “I’m not getting you killed.”

:( Choooooo. They make me So Emo he really just wants the slightly-unethical best for him

"You’re doing great, kid. Keep it up. You’re nearly there."

nice work Eli, if i didnt know better id say you were sincere, and unfortunatley Robbie Does Not Know Better

"he sees himself carrying Gabe on his back through the flooded ruins of Los Angeles, the face of the firefighter urging him through the break in the fence, Gabe strapped into the seat of the first car he bought."

:( they are!! so sweet!!!

"On the other side – there are no directions, everything is happening forward and all at once, but there is his side and the other side

– somebody gets punched in the stomach, and his dad is stepping in front of him, and a helicopter barrels down from the sky. He does his best not to look – impulse triggers, Dr Montesi said. That’s how you lose the thread."

yeah this might be a time where You Think About It actually

just a smidge

"Fuckin’ A, kid! A voice whoops like there’s someone standing right next to him".

concern.jpg

but also

i could use this 👁️👁️

"Oh god. He can see through the jaeger’s head cameras. He’s standing in the middle of a concrete room, and he is the jaeger, and then there’s a third view – he’s inside the jaeger’s cockpit, watching the status displays light up with something that feels almost like happiness blooming in his chest."

oh dude you are In It Now asafshgdfshagjdf

"Excuse you, that’s my side."

and

"Three bodies. The third view settles in among the others, unmoving but undeniably there. He’s pretty certain Cho talked about this – normally, there are three views, but Robbie doesn’t have a co-pilot.

Don’t think about it too hard.

Are you--?

Relax, we’re one and the same, yeah?"

AAAAAAAAH???? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH???????!

I DONT EVEN HAVE COHEERRENT THOUGHT FOR THIS THERES JUST SCREAMING

"Pretty cool, huh?

It—it really is pretty cool. He’s really doing it, and other than the quick bursts of heat along the circuit lines there is barely any discomfort."

!!! They are both big dorks piloting a big robot and fanboying about it /j

" “Good,” he croaks out. He sounds a little manic."

UH OH THIS IS MAKING ME THIIIIINK ABOUT GHOST DRIFTIIIING AGAAAAIN

"Canelo nods and pushes the mic from his comm link to speak into it among the noise: “Pilot confirms, vision clear,” and the realisation hits Robbie like a freight train.

He’s piloting a fucking jaeger."

DAMN RIGHT HE IS LETS GOOO

(There's no time to explain, get in the jaeger)

Ghost Rider Pacific Rim AU - perception shift

“They, um. Mapped all the seizure points. The risk is minimal. I just don’t know how long it will take, so—”

Robbie doesn’t know who he is trying to convince – himself of Gabe’s shift teacher. Mrs Lai has the expression of someone who has had to sit enough children through conversations like this. He catches her glancing towards the box of tissues on her desk. Her eyes are dry.

“Of course. Gabe is more than welcome to stay in the children’s centre as long as you are away.” Mrs Lai winces, just a little. “But, just in case—”

“Just in case,” Robbie repeats like it’s a spell.

“We don’t have any next of kin information. Is there anyone...?”

He sat through a four-hour long psychiatric evaluation last night. He’s not going to break down in a teacher’s office. You cried in the shower like a little girl. And now he’s fine. Great. Can we get a move on? When he doesn’t answer for long enough, Mrs Lai nods to herself, one sharp movement like she’s putting a decisive dot at the end of a sentence.

“I will make sure to schedule Lisa for a wrap-around shift. She and Gabriel get along really well.”

He opens his mouth to say: that won’t be necessary, and shuts it again. Just in case.

Mrs Lai recommends that Robbie leaves through the staff entrance to avoid bumping into Gabe, then insists when Robbie wants to see him before he goes.

“It’s already halfway through the music class,” she says. Not unkindly. “I saw you tell him you will pick him up as normal. Let’s stick to that plan, shall we?”

Robbie never lies to Gabe. What is he doing? What the hell did he agree to? Only the best chance at making something out for yourself. Come on, move it, let’s go let’s go let’s go! The weird mix of dread and excitement makes him too queasy to even consider breakfast. He sits on the stairs at the back of the children’s centre with his head in his hands for who knows how long, until enough people passing give him weird looks that he has to go or attract security.

See, another benefit. Rangers don’t have to worry about security. Yeah. They only have to worry about catastrophic brain damage. The only type of brain damage worth having, if you think about it.

Robbie has been living out of the academy sweatpants for several weeks and the way the undersuit clings to his skin feels a little suffocating. It’s heavier than he expected, too. It’s all the circuitry. Pull the hip plates up or the techs will do it for you, and they ain’t gentle. The neck brace clicks in place, just push it together, it won’t break.

It’s like going through the motions, even though he’s never seen one of these suits up close before. Or maybe it’s just not that hard to figure out. Like in the academy, he has the vague sense of what to do next, and next, and next, and it all breaks apart if he thinks about it too hard, so he lets the instinct drive him forward in an unknown direction and hopes it will all turn out alright in the end.

Did he watch his dad suit up at some point? He must have.

Each active jaeger has its own dedicated drivesuit room, most at the top of the dome with the detached Conn-Pods waiting to be lowered onto the mech, and Cherno Alpha’s right off the walkway, feet away from the open hatch to it’s built-in cockpit. Hell Charger doesn’t have one set up – yet – so the techs have rigged one of the maintenance rooms a level below the access point with all the monitoring systems. At least a dozen pairs of eyes fix on Robbie as soon as he walks out from behind the stack of boxes serving as his changing room. Somebody takes his phone and clothes out of his arms – he meant to text Gabe before turning it off, is it too late to—of course it’s too late to back out, don’t be a pussy.

“Damn,” the head tech lifts up his goggles to take a better look at him. He’s a big guy, tall and broad and clearly used to people giving him a wide berth. “Ain’t this a blast from the past.”

Robbie swallows around the growing lump in his throat. “Yeah?”

The man reaches out for a handshake. At least the undersuit hides how sweaty Robbie’s palms are all of the sudden. “It’s Canelo. I used to run power routes for The Charger back in the day.”

Oh. Oh! “R-Reyes.” Don’t get star-struck, he’s just a wrench. “You knew my--?”

“There’s still a few of us around from the good old days, yeah,” Canelo slaps his massive hand on Robbie’s shoulder and pulls him to the centre of the room. He makes ‘good old days’ sound like a curse. “We’ll catch up once this whole thing shakes out, hm? I assume Cho talked you through the procedure.”

Robbie nods to confirm. When he looks, Cho gives them a thumbs-up from across the room. He always looks three coffees past bedtime, but he’s been extra jittery today. Even now, he’s gesturing around the screens with an open can of an energy drink and the tech next to him might brain him with her power tool if he spills anything.

“Stand still, limbs apart,” Canelo instructs Robbie, pointing to the markers on the floor. As soon as he takes position, he’s surrounded by people carrying pieces of the drivesuit armour. It’s not a full set; just enough to ensure Cho can monitor his brain activity. The uneven weight distribution makes him feel half-dressed.

“We disconnected the joint motors.” Canelo’s booming voice carries over the noise of the drills screwing the pauldrons to the chest plate. “You’ll only be able to move the head and upper torso after you plug in. It should lighten the neural load, keep you from going under.”

Killjoy.

Robbie does his best to cooperate with the techs, but he hates being prodded and he hates people looking at him, and rather quickly he finds himself hating the way the circuitry against his skin heats up when the switches get flipped. You can feel that? Shouldn’t he? Is something already going wrong?

The hot spiderweb along his spine cools down almost immediately. Huh. Maybe it’s just the initial power surge.

“Right,” Cho appears in front of him like he wasn’t just elbows deep in a mess of cables leading from the monitoring station to the back of Robbie’s drivesuit. His gloves are black from grease and some of it made it up his forearms. He’s got a surprising amount of know-how in this department for someone ostensibly in charge of the biology side of things. “Everyone else will be watching the feed up on the bridge. Canelo got a new helmet prepped; we’re going to modify the Conn-Pod so you don’t have to initialise the drift yourself.” He peels the gloves off to take said helmet from another tech. Yet another wraps the thick cable running from it’s top on a pole to hook it directly above Robbie’s head. Now that he's noticed, the whole ceiling looks like it's crawling with tentacles. Cables. They're just cables.

Here we go. It’s happening. Cho hands him the helmet and it’s honestly a miracle Robbie doesn’t immediately drop it. Keep it together. Think about the—the medical insurance or whatever. Come on, you’re panicking, do the breathing thing. He does, and Cho must notice, because his expression turns into something... guilty.

“You’re gonna be alright,” he says, sounding as confident as usual but with a very different set to his eyebrows. “I will see a seizure coming before you even get a tingle. We’re not taking any chances, we’ll pull you out the second there’s a blip on the radar, okay?” He puts his hands on the shoulder guards on either side of Robbie’s neck. “I’m not getting you killed.”

Robbie wonders if he feels like he did when speaking to Mrs Lai. He licks his lips, but there’s nothing to say, so he just nods instead. Cho nods back before stepping away, and then all there is left to do is to pull the helmet over his face and hope like hell he wasn’t lying.

The relay gel immediately washes down the HUD, the display flickering to life. He can tell when each circuit activates by the hot flashes travelling along his skin and he has to force his breathing even again. You’re doing great, kid. Keep it up. You’re nearly there.

“Alright, everyone to position,” Cho calls, muted through the helmet. “Prepare for drift protocol.”

Oh god, he’s going to throw up. You’re fine. Stay on the surface and don’t go chasing whatever you see, and you’ll be just fine.

“Drift activating in three, two, one—”

The washed-out blue pulls him in like a whirlwind, completely out of his body. It’s like travelling at high speed past monochrome images – he sees himself carrying Gabe on his back through the flooded ruins of Los Angeles, the face of the firefighter urging him through the break in the fence, Gabe strapped into the seat of the first car he bought. On the other side – there are no directions, everything is happening forward and all at once, but there is his side and the other side – somebody gets punched in the stomach, and his dad is stepping in front of him, and a helicopter barrels down from the sky. He does his best not to look – impulse triggers, Dr Montesi said. That’s how you lose the thread. Each scene flashes for maybe a fraction of a second, long enough only to register before moving on, and on, and on, until both sides crash into each other and—

Fuckin’ A, kid! A voice whoops like there’s someone standing right next to him. No, don’t focus on that. The egghead’s talking.

“—process successful!”

Robbie blinks. He realises he’s bent his neck forward at some point, and when he lifts his chin, it’s like the helmet suddenly weighs several tons. There’s a loud creak outside the room, followed by a second of stunned silence inside of it. Robbie blinks the blue away to see a tech run to poke her head outside the door.

Cho waves a hand, and Canelo steps into Robbie’s field of vision. “Any bright spots? Nausea?”

Without thinking, Robbie shakes his head no. More creaking from the outside, like a bridge settling. The lookout tech shouts something in Cantonese and Cho’s focused expression breaks into a grin.

“No signs of kick back,” he says. “Hey, Reyes! Can you shrug?”

Slowly, it dawns on Robbie what’s happening. He lifts his shoulders, the extra weight becoming more natural by the second. Someone cheers. Watch this. Next time he blinks, he’s looking at the hangar like he’s standing on the access walkway, and—

Oh god. He can see through the jaeger’s head cameras. He’s standing in the middle of a concrete room, and he is the jaeger, and then there’s a third view – he’s inside the jaeger’s cockpit, watching the status displays light up with something that feels almost like happiness blooming in his chest.

Excuse you, that’s my side.

When he blinks back to the control room, nobody seems to be talking to him for all the noise of multiple people speaking all at once. He blinks again, and the LOCCENT bridge seems to be within reach of his arm. The more he does it, the easier it gets to hold both views, like he’s inhabiting two bodies at once—

Three bodies. The third view settles in among the others, unmoving but undeniably there. He’s pretty certain Cho talked about this – normally, there are three views, but Robbie doesn’t have a co-pilot.

Don’t think about it too hard.

Are you--?

Relax, we’re one and the same, yeah?

Robbie focuses on his real body. Behind the monitoring equipment, Cho is frowning, but doesn’t look concerned so much as—

He’s fucking thrilled, that’s what he is. He wanted a solo drift and here you are, drifting solo. Enjoy the moment.

He wishes he could see The Charger move when he does. He’s seen the footage from his accident, but the miniscule shift of the giant head was almost imperceptible. Now, he can feel the hydraulics under the steel hull like he can feel the way his muscles strain when lifting a kettlebell.

Pretty cool, huh?

It—it really is pretty cool. He’s really doing it, and other than the quick bursts of heat along the circuit lines there is barely any discomfort. His bad eye feels a little hot, but it’s no worse than having a bright light shone into it during medical exams.

He’s not going to die. Told you. He’s drifting, and it’s working, and Robbie isn’t going to die.

“Reyes, talk to me,” Canelo taps on the side of his helmet. “How’re you doing?”

“Good,” he croaks out. He sounds a little manic. “Good, is it really moving?”

Yeah she is!

“Yep, we’ll get you the side-by-side later. Medical wants to know if your vision is clear in both views.”

He doesn’t even have to blink to be sure. “It’s clear,” he confirms.

Canelo nods and pushes the mic from his comm link to speak into it among the noise: “Pilot confirms, vision clear,” and the realisation hits Robbie like a freight train.

He’s piloting a fucking jaeger.

[starfanatic]

Luke Skywalker vs Rey... Nobody

I hate the argument that a lot of sequel trilogy stans use whenever anyone criticized Rey or labels her a Mary Sue. It’s probably the weakest argument a sequel stan can ever possibly say to me. (Besides the people hate Rey because she’s a women argument).

Lets compare them shall we?

Luke Skywalker in A New Hope is whiny, inexperienced, and very naive. There is multiple moments in a new hope that proves this. When he was whining about not wanting to stay on the moisture farm and wanting to join the Academy like his friend, Biggs. He constantly was slightly annoying throughout the film, especially to Han. When Han named his price and Luke was like “We can buy our own ship with that!” or when Han was flying the Milennium Falcon and Luke was practically yelling in his ear to go into hyperspace. Han and Luke did not get along at first because of Luke’s behavior. Luke went against Obi-Wan’s orders and saved Princess Leia, not thinking of the consequences. How he could possibly be killed or put in a cell with the Princess. He doesn’t think of a plan to get out AFTERWARDS only the spur of the moment. He was constantly shown to be inexperienced and needed his friends help or HE WOULD HAVE DIED THE FIRST MOVIE. While on the millennium falcon, Obi-Wan taught him things about the force. Maybe not a lot but he knew how to use the simple basics of it. Like sensing the force and letting it guide your actions (as Obi-Wan was trying to teach him before). For once Luke listened and trusted Obi-Wan and destroyed the death star.

Lets do Rey now WHOOP. So far the only personality flaw she seems to have is that she’s also naive? She had the same wide-eyed innocence as Luke had but it’s different and here’s why. Rey never suffers for any of her so-called almost non-existent flaws. Rey is experienced enough to hold her own in a fight against men WAY stronger then her (that’s realistic though but that’s one tool in her belt). She’s bilingual. She can fly the millennium falcon better then Han Solo even though she never flew one before. She is constantly saving people by herself, never the one being saved. (Before y’all bust my balls, Rey escaped that damn starkiller base by her damn self. Luke didn’t and couldn’t). She uses powers that takes years to learn and the excuse is the force dyad. So she downloads Kylo’s skills and training. Great. Magnificent. Rey is on a amazing start. And this is the first movie! She can only get stronger from here.

Luke is more mature and responsible in ESB. He’s a respected hero of the rebellion. Luke still struggles using the force. Even with the training Luke goes through with Obi-Wan he had to truly focus to pull the lightsaber to him. Plus as a common occurrence, he still needed help from his friends. He’s not invincible. He actually gets severely hurt (makes sense). He goes to Dagobah to get trained (because unlike Rey he doesn’t have the “learn force jedi shit that takes years to learn” cheatcode). And then he’s impatient. He wants to learn how to use the force so he can help his friends. Luke is again reckless, impatient, and he’s also insecure in his own belief. Him not believing he can lift the X-wing was why he couldn’t. Against his master’s and Obi-Wan’s orders he decides to save his friends. It’s a noble reason to but it still got him fucked up. He got his hand cut off, he was beaten and humiliated, and then he was told a horrifying revalation that twisted around everything he knew and believed. He was scared of Vader, you can see it on his face, but he did not succumb to fear.

Rey goes to the island to convince Luke to go help them fight the war. Why doesn’t Leia go instead? Who knows. Why does Luke act the way he does? Who knows. Luke dismissed her and was quite rude to her. Rey was having cute little talks with Kylie Renner in their little force dyad BS. She called him a monster and a murderous snake. I like the insults. It fills me with joy! But then she finds out the truth. Rey did do something reckless and stupid but as usual she doesn’t suffer the consequences to her actions. Technically she’s morally superior to Luke because she saw the good in him and felt like she could turn him to the light (after slicing his face open. Ok). Rey decides to give herself up to the First Order thinking Kylo would save her. And he does. So she wasn’t even wrong... Rey fight the very elite guards of the (bootleg emperor palpatine) Supreme Leader Snoke. Reminder, TFA and TLJ are like 3-4 days apart. She had zero training within these days. Luke refused to train her so don’t start that bullshit. Luke trained her for like 5 minutes and none of that training had anything to do with lightsaber dueling. Rey is then told she was a nobody. Now why did Rey cry about this? I truly don’t know. How the hell would Kylo accurately know that Rey’s parents were nobody? Didnt Rey been know this from the force awakens? Eh whatever. She tries to force pull the lightsaber from Kylo Ren and do a dumbass tug a war instead of walking up and grabbing it. It reminds me of JJ and Rian fighting over where the star wars sequels). Anakin must be screaming and yelling from above... or below... idk. The lightsaber then breaks. Rey then saves her friends by showing her once again superior piloting skills that rival or is possibly better then Anakin Skywalker himself. Hitting 3 in one shot? You go girl! She then uses the force to effortlessly move the big ass boulders out of the entrance to save the resistance. Last I remember... Luke struggled to do that with a few way smaller rocks and was also focusing hard to do.

Luke is finally at jedi status! Woohoo! Now Luke first saves Han from Jabba. It shows his very dark side tendencies by choking the guards (like father like son). Luke thinks of a actual plan before going in (CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT). Luke “Chanel Boots” Skywalker goes to Yoda on his death bed. All he wants is answers but Yoda wants to be cryptic as fuck. Luke has been lied to for years by his mentors and his family. Luke’s father isn’t hero Anakin Skywalker but actually a big, asthmatic, merciless, murderous asshole who has a choking kink. Luke then says he cannot kill his own father and Obi-Wan, who believes Vader isn’t a human but a machine, has no faith in Luke. He believes that Luke will fail and the Empire would win. Luke feels the conflict and good in him that nobody else does. He knows that Vader is unloyal to the emperor and he actually cares about his own son. When he is with Han and Leia he realizes he made a mistake and has a bad feeling about it. (*gasp* Luke is not being super reckless). He’s not arrogant (not in anyway) but he’s completely confident that Vader would turn. (He isn’t flawless there is still obvious problem with this plan he has. He fails, the empire wins. He dies, the emperor wins. Vader doesn’t turn, Luke fails. Luke almost succumbs to the dark side and it’s actually plausible he might fully turn. He wants to desperately save his friends and his father has done horrible things to Luke. Luke had every reason to kill Vader. But he doesn’t. He throws the lightsaber away and foolishly puts his life in Vader’s hand. Luke doesn’t save the galaxy because he can make things levitate with the force. He wins because he had the strength to resist the dark side and has so much love and pure good in his heart he saw the good in his father.

Rey starts off with a training session (no idc it’s too fucking late now. 3 movies in? Is she doing reverse character development?) and basically Poe gets mad at Rey for not accompanying them on missions. I still don’t know why she needs training, when she is at a decent strength to fight elite guards, fight kylo ren, and a variety of other things that typically takes a long time to learn. After finding out Palpatine returned, Rey goes on a mission to find the way finder almost like a shitty videogame. I don’t even want to talk about the force dyad anymore because it’s fucking dumb. Rey gets chased by the force order and hear this out, FORCE HEALS (i forgot what the animal was but idrc). Which means Rey had the power to stop the painful truth of death themself. Why am I not surprised? Rey did something that no other jedi nor sith or jedi have ever done this. Anakin went to the dark side to save the ones he love. This movie was just a slap in the face to Anakin. Rey then fights Kylo Ren and lost??? again it seems a little too late and it also didn’t make sense. Rey defeated those guards all by herself with Kylo needed help from her. She’s obviously the better lightsaber duelist but hey, at least JJ was trying to mellow her out a bit. Rey stabs him while our beloved Princess died. She then regrets her decision and as always, doesn’t have any consequence to her actions. By the force I forgot, the whole scene where she is revealed as a Palpatine? Completely invalidates the first two movies but eh whatever. She uses a power that only the elite sith does... something Kylo Ren himself could not do (and he’s on the dark side). Rey “killed” Chewie but actually no she didn’t because Chewie is perfectly fine. Rey is supposed to be all dark and edgy now, “you don’t know me” BS. Yeah I’m sorry I won’t tolerate this because my only allergy is the fish smelling coochie bullshit called the sequel trilogy. Rey got scared of her dark self. Well at least JJ tried? Rey then almost gives up but Luke was like “nah fam you cant”. Rey dies trying to fight Palpatine but then as usual, she gets zero consequence cuz Benny Simp saved her using the force. Then she kissed him... no. No. No. This made my eyes burn like they just threw bleach in my eyes. It made no sense. “A Kiss of Gratitude”? What the shit was that? GIRLS DO NOT INSPIRE TO BE REY.

[winterscaptain]

i loved hotch’s top 3 parent moments, but what are his top 3 most defeated moments & how do the kids/mom help him cope/feel better

ooooh these got REALLY long so they’re going under a cut (they’re basically three drabbles so i included the ajf tag list (whoops))

a joyful future masterlist

1.

aaron comes back home from very long day full of infuriating people and politics, and isaac has left everything all over the living room floor. he trips on something (probably shoes) and breaks. he doesn’t get mean or anything, but his bark is definitely harsher than he intended. isaac is so so upset, and he holes himself up in his room. aaron feels awful, instantly. mom runs interference, and spends some time in the dark with isaac so he can calm down with minimal stimulus. when isaac is ready, mom goes back into the living room and finds aaron distraught, his head in his hands. 

“i promised myself i wasn’t going to become my father.” 

mom just wraps around him like a koala and is like “you’re not. you just had a bad day. for god’s sake, jack snapped at me over something ridiculous yesterday, and isaac and soph got into a knock-down drag-out fight last week about a puzzle while caro was simultaneously throwing a tantrum about fruit snacks. we’re all allowed to have bad days, and you can make it right. he’s a smart kid - just tell him what’s going on and remind him that you’re not upset with him and that you love him.” 

aaron goes to isaac’s door, knocks, and waits for isaac to tell him he can come in. aaron sits at the foot of his bed, waiting. they sit in the dark for a long time, and isaac eventually crawls into aaron’s lap. his dad tells him everything that happened in his day at work, and rounded it all off with “it was wrong of me to get upset with you, little man. it wasn’t your fault, and i love you more than anything, all the time, no matter what. i’m so sorry, and i hope you can forgive me.”

“i can.” 

mom walks in later to find them asleep, aaron propped against the headboard with his ankles crossed, isaac sprawled across his chest. 

2.

when the girls are older, maybe 14 or 15, he puts his foot down about an out-of-town concert with a friend and their older brother. the concert is a few days away, and sophia mentions it over dinner. 

without really meaning to, he goes into full drill sergeant mode and gets a little too specific about all the things that could go wrong. it was very clear in the moment that the topic was not up for discussion, that he was not under any circumstances going to allow the girls to go to a concert a couple hours away with only a nineteen year-old college sophomore as a supervisor. 

it turns into one of those “i hate you you never let me do anything” teenager moments. sophia gets up and shuts herself in the garage with the treadmill and runs until she’s tired, showering and going straight into her room without a word or glance in his direction. caroline really quietly sets her napkin on the table, and leaves out the back door, headed for the porch swing that faces the back of the property. she, too, goes to bed without saying goodnight. 

mom doesn’t say anything in the moment, and they finish dinner with the boys (isaac, now 16 or 17, and elliot, now 10 or 11) and get them ready to wind down for the night. when they settle into bed, he starts to doubt himself. 

“i was too hard on them, wasnt i?” 

before mom can answer, aaron gets a call from jack (now 26 or 27) on his cell. he tells him that sophia tattled to him about the concert, and he didnt mention this to them, but he’d be okay taking the day off work to take them and their friends, and even find a spot to stay overnight so they aren’t out driving late.

mom eavesdrops. aaron tells jack to hold on a second, and mutes him. mom says that would be a good compromise and reminds him that they aren’t little anymore, and they can mostly fend for themselves (thanks to a few weeks’ worth of self-defense with derek over the summer). “i know it’s hard, honey. i can’t say i’m wild about it either, but if jack goes, i’d feel a lot better about that than the alternatives.”

he sighs, kisses her, and tells jack that would be alright. “i’ll go down the hall and tell them.”

“have some sucking up to do, old man?”

aaron just rolls his eyes and hangs up before walking down the hall. he knocks on the door, and two flat “what”s come from the other side of the door. he opens it, and finds caroline and sophia facing each other from their beds on either side of the room. he could tell they were talking shit, the set of their mouths giving them away. 

they’re looking at him like he’s goddamn war criminal. he pulls caro’s desk chair and sits backward on it in between the ends of their beds. “your brother has very graciously offered to take friday off of work to take you and your friends to the concert and spend the night in norfolk with you.” 

“so, you’re letting us go?” 

he tries not to let the biting resentment in sophia’s tone get to him. “i am. i’m sorry for coming down hard on you at dinner. it was wrong of me, and i understand that it could feel like i don’t trust your judgement. i do.” he looks at them each in turn. “it just freaks me out a little that you’re getting older a lot faster than i thought you would.” 

caro’s lip wobbles, and she throws her covers back and crosses to him, giving him a hug. “thank you. we’ll be good, i promise.” 

“i know, my little love.” 

it takes him a little while to get back into sophia’s good graces, but when he picks them up from jack’s apartment at the end of the weekend, she can’t stop talking about how much fun she had. he’s pretty sure he’s forgiven. 

3. 

its when he first starts dating mom that jack starts to act out. he’s usually a really well-tempered kid, but sometimes he’d snap at her or withdraw and it made her feel awful. there were definitely a couple of nights were he’d snap at her over something small and she would retreat to the back bedroom to take a minute. it wore on aaron to tell her that she wasn’t an imposition, that she wasn’t replacing haley, that she isn’t his second choice or ‘the backup’

they both have this moment of total defeat - they’ve known each other for so long, and jack has known her most of his life, but the change in relationship status really brought up a lot of stuff for the kiddo. 

mom comes around faster, learning to understand that jack is just adjusting and having trouble with the idea that there’s a semi-permanent female figure in his life, and that his dad’s attention is divided. thus, when aaron inevitably breaks down about it, she’s there. 

“i feel selfish. maybe i shouldn’t have -”

“aaron. we are doing everything we can to make this an easy adjustment for him, but it’s difficult.”

“but nothing’s changed! you’ve been here for five years.” 

“love, everything’s changed, and we’ve only been dating for a couple of months. that’s a lot for someone who’s barely seven. you’re not selfish, you’re not a bad parent. you haven’t made a bad judgement call. he’s just really young and is having trouble handling these very big changes in his home landscape.” 

so aaron finds a therapist for jack to see twice a week, figuring it was a good idea anyway with all the trauma he may or may not remember. it’s still sucky for a while, but as jack starts implementing the coping mechanisms he learns and mom takes on a role closer to a peer or friend than a parent, things get a lot easier. 

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