#didnt even ask if i was ok lol | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

kittychosis · 14 days ago

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i just cant stop being angry thinking about the small things that have happened recently and then reflecting back on the bigger warning signs i shouldve paid more attention to

#i went to the hospital and had a panic attack loudly in the lobby bathroom #bc they just took my blood and im afraid of needles #and i thought i was dying of pnemonia and hadnt eaten in a week #i told him about it and all he did was laugh and say #“you had a panic attack? everyone was probably thinking about what a pussy you are”#i said i cant help it and he said yah i know you do that annoying thing where you hyperventilate #didnt even ask if i was ok lol #hasnt even really talked to me #gets angry when i want attention/affection #always has something more important to do than even spend 1 second interacting w me #im not even exaggerating

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simcardiac-arrested · 2 years ago

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me and my weed ancient

#i hope this design & colors will suffice👍 i think i’m actually not that insane over them #didnt even look at it for 7 straight hours #i did this instead of my homework. i think i’ll die tomorrow in class but it’s ok.#damn haha i will endure lol😅#yeah i like these colors i think. yeah (hums and looks into the far away distance) yeah #myart #no lore & fun facts this time bc it’s just wade. & i can’t be fucked i want to go Drink #unless you have any questions about him tho then feel free to ask and i will answer #oc: wade

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lxnarphase · 5 months ago

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sometimes i want to engage with my followers more but i don't know how to, i feel so awkward and i just stand there and wave my arm

#im like 'hi :D' and im so shy #i wanna do ask games but last time i did it again i didnt get any LOL ITS OK ITS JUST FUNNY #idk i wanna bond with my followers !!#even if its just talking about fanfics and gay things #˗ˏˋ ★ from lunnie .ᐟ

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tangledinink · 1 year ago

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i want desperately for you guys to know that this is how swanatello was born. he was designed and drawn in a span of approximately 30 minutes at work and made originally with the only intention being "pun." thanks @actuallynobutwhynot for getting me to make him lmao i gotta draw him and your sona together sometime.

#swanatello #and look at us now jfc #i didnt even intend for him to have any kind of a story i just sort of #made it up recently #as i did shitty doodles of him while talking about risesonas with friends #thanks also @ beanarry for making me want a donniesona in the first place #and @ sep council for bringing up risesonas and getting me to dust him off #and thanks @ bean again for getting me to post him lol i wasnt expecting anyone to??? care abt him #like to be fair its not like hes BLOWING UP or whatever but i have never gotta so much attention in my askbox before #and he has literally existed on tumblr for #like #four days #and i have gotten SO many asks and fanart and shit abt him and i am just blown away and also absolutely TICKLED #thanks gang #i am glad you like him #..... <3 #i like him too #i like telling his story #and im really happy that i have kind of been tricked into just?#doing really shitty low effort doodles and being ok with that being what i post?#it is very freeing #anyway thanks <3 #i will get to all the asks eventually #some of them im hanging onto #because answering them involves dropping MAD lore and sort of slingshotting the story forward and i dont wanna like #reveal everything right away ig?#so patience plz <3 #i will get to everything i can eventually

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nana2009 · 10 months ago

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why does Dave drug karkat? Is he like…flighty or something??

buoy is he.

karkat is not the most compliant captive, see.... especially since dave doesn't seem to want to actively harm him and acts so passive most of the time, so even with the possibility of things going sour that does not stop him from trying!! unfortunately, dave knows much too well how to handle these situations :/

but since karkat is so persistent and loud, sometimes a buoy has no options u kno? ;T

#all kinds of drugs to calm him down #and by calm him down i mean ranging from high enough to not be able to form a single word to knocked out cold. depending on the situation #homestuck #yes i referenced sensei's poor-shrimp based comic there lol #(hate how you can tell when i did and didnt use references. ack. rawbogged nearly everyfin)#davekat #karkat vantas #dave strider #yandere dave #ruroekaki #ask #karkat is not the most skilled in untying ropes but he can be creative enough to find ways how to(happened more than once)#and also screaming loud as FUCK!!!#its ok tho dave is a musician so no one finds weird the fact that his walls are soundproof :3 #if people even came to this weirdo's apartment in the first place #he's a bit of a lone loser. yea #GRAAAAAAAAH I NEED TO TALK MORE ABOAT THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.......

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yanderespamton78 · 7 months ago

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Pinup!!!!! the baby!!!! the guy!!!!

sorry if this looks kinda iffy the majority of this was drawn between 11pm and 2:30am so i was very tired loll

also yes that is a totoro bag i dont care if totoro doesnt exist in cyber city he has a totoro bag come at me

Pinup belongs to @turntableart

#read all the tags before you reblog otherwise you will be confused #i feel like i got the body type wrong uaughhh #i feel like the proportions are inaccurate #im blaming it on the clothes i promise the sketch looked good then the clothes went and ruined it #i feel really bad admitting this but now that i think about it i literally never draw chubby characters #all my addisons are pretty long and gangly for the most part and then spamton is just very small in my style hes not really pudgy #and tbh i didnt really draw full bodies very often before addisons and spamton but my one (1) oc was also pretty long and lanky #probably because i myself am pretty long and lanky #ueuugough hauguh #i need to practice more #also i feel like the shoes look weird #im generally not too happy with it but its ok ig #i was terrified of making the features too exaggerated and being offensive and i think i went to much the other way and just made him skinn #ffs #ill draw him again i promise #and it will look better pinky promise #��🤙🤙 theres no proper pinky emoji #i love him tho hes cute #i really like his original design #uururuguggg #ugh debating whether i should even post this or if i should keep tinkering with it #im gonna tinker with it a bit more i will continue writing tags when im done #ok tinkering over im much happier with it now #i made him a bit shorter and that solved all my problems #i think i have a habit of drawing characters too tall ngl lmao #also not too happy with the rendering but its good enough #uh im only posting the tinkered version that im happy with so if you want the untinkered version then just ask lol #pixel art #art #turn off the lights arg

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tamagotchikgs · 5 months ago

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i wonder if ill ever get to know myself in a different environment or if ill b the same stunlocked kid forever

#one of the few hopes i have left #every other one has been stomped into the ground lol...#getting older. getting therapy. taking meds #moving out of our childhood home (altho still with family which i know . is very not good 4 me)#it was all supposed to make me better #it was supposed to make life better #but it didnt #im still the ecact same #and my therapist keeps asking me what i expect to change and im too ashamed but.. most scared to answer #because im not ready for her to tell me it is unattainable #i need my last hope #i need the hope that i can be ok that i can feel different and Think different and experience things different #i think having my boyfriend has been the first time ive actually felt like i made it into the imagined hope #like i finally broke through #even before we started dating like #being able to actually be comfortable with someone for the first time maybe ever #ive never. had my fuckd up brain or body allow me that before #n theyre so fucking cool too #coolest person in the world #n i am so grateful 2 even get to chat w them #n that i get 2 love them #n that they take me as i am #even tho i still feel like i need 2 get better i need 2 improve #because they deserve the best u know #n they make it all seem possible #i hope they dont read this it is embarrassing #i say as if i havent told them before #but im just . in my feelings

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carcarrot · 5 months ago

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well that was a shortlived good feeling about my job

#maybe i should just become unemployed. maybe i should just suffer!#recap of todays further events .#that supervisor? who i kinda didnt already like but now absolutely hate?#she came down to confirm that i wasnt leaving. okay . and then she fucking tells me #oh we're going to get another person to help out from this other company. we were going to do that bc we thought you were leaving #but she thinks that even if im staying there should be another person on this floor. bc apparently more has to be done #and there are 'constant complaints' abt this floor . which doesnt make sense to me bc there shouldnt be #and so we're waiting to see what the manager decides but hes on fucking vacation and wont get back until. next week??#she said she was gonna email him and like right after she left i emailed and texted him explaining everything #and trying to very nicely say hey what the fuck are you doing you don't need to hire anyone else #and if im doing a bad job fucking tell me so i can do it better. bitch #and she had the nerve to fucking tell me when she was talking to me #that i wont find an easier job than this one #well if its so fucking easy why are we hiring someone else #by the way getting that extra person from this other company doesnt cost them anything which is why theyre doing it i think #which is making me not feel good abt my own future lmao. like why would they keep paying me when they can get someone for free #and she was saying all this stuff like oh you have it so good here we dont write you up i do all this stuff to help you like . ok #i didnt ask you to come downstairs w the coffee order and if you wanted me to i would come up . god #but the thing of me not being able to find a better job like wow! what if i killed you. for saying that to my face #and she talks abt how shes been w the company 20 years ok and that doesnt give you an excuse to treat me like a child. jesus #anyway im very pissed off and not enjoying my work situation lol. i dont wanna do this anymore #but looking at other jobs im so unemployable. sigh

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man-destroyer · 2 days ago

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tell us about ancient spanish?

Yeah!

so. In the beginning of my comic (I'm assuming you havent read it, if you have I'm sorry) the main character is getting established as sort of a "master bullshitter" and very lucky. He's not stupid, the reason he's alive is because he reads situations quickly and lies very well... and at this point my editor had been repeatedly treating him with this sort of bumbling idiot trope, so I was already a bit frustrated.

He's caught as a stowaway on a pirate ship, and is bullshitting a treasure hunt so the pirates keep him alive long enough that he could escape. So, he makes a fake treasure map in Spanish, hoping that the pirates won't know any... because if they can just kill him and take the map, they will. And one of them knows Spanish!

So, the joke I put in to resolve the situation (which I kept) was "but can you READ Spanish?" where he's banking on the pirate's illiteracy, and he lucks out because she can't read.

but my editor wanted him to say "but do you know... ancient spanish?" which makes no sense and isnt funny LMAO to me.

There were a lot of instances like this, but this is the one I remember the most because my editor like. argued with me on putting ancient spanish in there... It was a back and forth for a good bit.

#like. they can see the map. in his hands.#if she knows spanish and can read it. she will know he is lying #and they will kill him #it doesnt resolve the situation #and its also not funny. like. what the hell does ancient spanish even mean. its nothing.#like I would have much rather resolved the situation by no one knowing spanish.#cause that requires him to stay alive to read the map. which was his goal. this whole time...#so her joke wasnt funny. makes no sense like. historically. AND doesnt even address the situation.#like a good edit understands the intent of the situation.#she gave a lot of what I like to call 'lateral edits' where they dont fundamentally change a scene at all #but they dont really make anything better. like it's not getting worse but its not helping anything either?#but then she had some edits that made things worse...#so I would do some of the lateral ones to sort of appease her and then she wouldnt notice that I didnt do the ones that made thing worse #but this was in the very beginning so I was combatting all the things I didnt want to do. instead of just not doing them #I'm not even getting edits anymore at this point in my career LOL #my second editor was amazing. she was sometimes slow to understand the point of a scene but she offered some really amazing edits #my current editor does literally nothing #she has not given me one note. like literally not even one. she sort of offhandedly said “enjoying reading it!” like ok... great...#and then my first editor. well. ancient spanist LOL #there were a few things I said I fundamentally refuse to do and she kept. asking. me. to do them #one time I had to argue with her that I wouldnt make a joke making fun of hairy men??? like I like hairy men what the hell???#ANYWAYS. yeah. thats ancient spanish #tried to be short but all my jokes are like extremely contextual so its hard to get enough context for them to make sense

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vincent-sinclair-deserved-better · 3 months ago

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hm

thinking of my blorbos but not in a "i love you you love me all is well" way but a "i love you hope you kill me" way lol

#cylas vents #negativity #negative #death wish #lmao #bitches be like '[potentially concerning thing]' and then add 'lol' as if it's funny or a joke lmao #like i mean technically it's not but then again it is bc it's me. like yeah don't worry don't take this seriously don't mind me ok #it doesn't really matter anyway kk. or maybe it's more like I'm the joke.#like idk the thought that like most of my f/os would probably kill me on sight should be less comforting than it is i guess #imagine casually making posts like this and still being like 'ok but maybe im not actually mentally ill maybe im faking maybe im lying to #myself maybe im making excuses maybe im imagining things maybe im just lazy' etc etc #none of the antidepressants since fluoxetine decided it's over have done shit and even my psychiatrist now is always like 'hm. so do you #want to keep trying other things' and like yeah what else can i do? therapy didnt do anything for this specific issue and the tagesklinik #lady didnt really seem to get my issue (well her suggestions for like therapy groups or whatever were more about socialising or whatever #like ??? girl that's really not the main problem here lmao but she also did have a point about how i would have to actually go there every #day etc but like #what else am i supposed to do #hi i am always tired and sometimes struggle to even get out of bed and thats why i worry about getting a job or something bc it could become #too much or whatever but like unfortunately thats kind of a requirement for everything lmao #when psychiatrist asks what i want/expect or whatever i am internally like 'a magic pill that just fixes everything and makes me a normal #functional human being' but like that's just not A Thing (tm)#so. like. what else am i supposed to do.#i don't want to be like this forever #idk how to tag lmai #using stuff like #tw suicidality #tw suicidal #tw suicidal ideation #just feels so over the top and like i dont have the right to use them lol

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lockandkeyhyena · 2 years ago

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#already finished one that should be up on my fimfic in a hot second #yeen rambles #polls #if requested i *can* give some lines/examples from each fic lol #warning a lot of these are. dark. lol #the options are vague for a reason #yeen writes #sure that tag can be used here #ok so i had more than 7. sue me.#this isnt even all of them i just picked the ones i wanted to work on the most #so i guess if you want more. ask. i didnt realise how many i had damn

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todayisafridaynight · 1 year ago

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brother was talking to me about how if you almost die from an extreme-temperature-related incident then your body is just forever fucked towards that temperature and that's why i think kiryu and saejima are weak to ice. i dont know why aoki isn't like that too but ignore that statistic everything else tracks.

#snap chats #i already made this post highkey but im making it again cause i didnt know this was an actual real thing ☠️#my brother learned this when he started to work for target. because apparently that's a thing they tell you frame one #'snap how did this topic even come up' i am LITERALLY so glad you asked :) the cold has almost claimed me twice #am i exaggerating Maybe but its my fucked up body temperature now listen #when i was younger i got locked out of my house for like. three hours since i was a latchkey kid #and my dad wasn't supposed to come home with my siblings (from their after school events) for Three Hours #and it had snowed outside and Was Cold Yeah and i couldn't get in cause i forgot my key like a weiner #and yeah. was really cold :) my dad was real cross with me when he found me shivering in the shed LOL #he made me hot cocoa tho so its ok. second incident's just funny No I Talk About It Evvery Other Week #and im p sure i talked bout the first incident too but yeah that time after the con when i was at my sister's #like i cannot stress how cold it was because It Was Late November and the cold still existed #and my sister's heater just. Didnt Work but yeah. i wont go into detail cause i share this story every five seconds #POINT IS i've always had a hard time with the cold- like i'm cold nearly all the time even if the room is 90 degrees #i wont be COLD cold but i'll be colder than i like #anyways can't believe i'm weak to ice this is so sad. i love winter..#aoki isn't weak to ice cause uhhhh /aoki/ didnt almost die in the cold 🥴 masato did 🥴#imagine changing your identity so well that you just remove your past elemental weakness. fucked up.#alright bye

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orcelito · 2 months ago

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Watching the Obito Reveal in naruto and while I still want to punch this guy in the face, I'm rly enjoying seeing how emotional Kakashi is getting AND how supportive Guy is being to him. Like Fuck You, obito, guy is here and he's better than you in every fucking way. Up to and including giving kakashi the support he deserves ❤️

#speculation nation #fanny watches naruto #and madara just showed up which puts guy and madara in the same area WHICH MEANSSSS #it's guy vs madara soon >:] at some point lol. we have a lot of backstory episodes to get thru first it seems.#actually how cool is it that this fight is madara and obito vs kakashi guy And the two most powerful jinchuuriki #everyone on this field right now is so OP. it's very fun heheh #also kinda funny how five of these people are from konoha. then theres just bee here from the cloud #like shoutout to him for working with them so hard when this is ENTIRELY konoha bullshit wrecking the place #two uchiha here bc of personal vendettas etc etc and WHERES THE THIRD??????#who knows lol sasuke's off on a personal quest for the truth rn. gotta educate himself before he decides on a side to support.#it's so funny. like i mean he already did smth so helpful for the world by helping itachi take down kabuto #but then hes like. well idfk what to do now bc he hates konoha Even More but itachi declared his continued loyalty to it #so hes like. well lets talk to the All Knowing One (???) to ask questions. like ok i mean fair point.#wish we didnt have to bring orochimaru back for this tho. i quite liked him being dead for 200 episodes.#sasuke is in the midst of a metamorphosis... only by learning the Truth will he emerge as his true self... etc etc lol #anyways itd be fun to see sasuke fighting against his fellow uchiha. like come ON stop fucking up the world guys!!!!#but yeah im getting to a lot of big shit. ep 344 out of 500. still got a while to go. but im definitely in the Late Stage!!!!!#not looking forward to the neji thing. thats coming up in the next few dozen episodes. ugh.

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widevibratobitch · 1 year ago

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so i am singing that vitellia in the end... but at what fucking cost.

'you gotta sing this softer'

'what'

'this is mozart'

'this is vitellia'

'this is mozart'

'im singing about how much i hate this mf and want him dead before the end of the day'

'this is mozart'

'i wanna murder a guy'

'this is mozart'

'...'

'softer. gentle. mozart'

'...ok'

#they're killing me here #i already bargained for ONE (1) note in chest (thank you so so much that i am ALLOWED to sing an A3 in chest voice <333) and now THIS #THIS is why people hate mozart. fuck you.#i recorded that rehearsal and the first version sounds SO MUCH BETTER. after i did what she asked me to do its just. so fucking boring.#i hate it here #i love this duet so much but frfr im not sure i wanna do it if i have to do it on their terms.#also like sorry to be a bitch but you're a pianist girl. just stick to your stuff and let me take care of mine.#just because you're playing this like you're constipated because tHiS iS mOzArT doesnt mean the rest of us dont care either.#its possible i never will get the chance to sing the entire vitellia so i want to do justice. as much as im able. to this one chance i get #it took me A Long While to deal with the fact that i wont be able to bark that 'indegno' and 'regno' like i always envisioned.#but like. ok. whatever. i can still make it Entertaining. THIS however. no. no fucking way.#and its not even about me being a big-headed know-it-all who thinks she's better than everyone because. lol and lmao clearly im Not #but this is about having a fucking SOUL. its about actually taking the libretto into consideration too. its about trying to figure out #WHY mozart wrote it the way he did. like sorry but this is another fiordiligi case where its CLEAR that the amplitudes the crazy jumps #are there FOR A REASON. the reason is HE WANTED A CONTRAST. some fucking EMOTION. he sure as hell didnt want it to be Soft And Gentle.#i know it because i talked to him and he told me im right about everything as always and you can eat shit girl bye #grrrrrrrr im so angry #i knos i sound so arrogant here but please. please i just want to make this music fun and enjoyable. i just dont want it to be boring #please understand my vision im begging you

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yanderespamton78 · 7 months ago

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the current state of the arg

sorry guys the art isnt arting D:

(btw if youre confused on why i drew turnip like that i was referencing the picrew he did ages ago bc idk it looked fun to draw anddd i dont like taking reference off real life images)

#i felt like just a lillll bit of a creep relistening to voice messages over and over to find a good quote but. yk what. it was worth it #i totally didnt take reference from the really cool face i used in that animation because im still really proud of it #idk if emi or TD have a sona but if they do im not aware of it and i didnt feel like asking so i just drew both of them as blank characters #im too stressed to scheme lol #maybe #just maybe #i need to stop drinking tea because the caffiene makes me anxious #...#naaaaahhhh #i dont really know what to do with myself atm because i dont want to work on the animation unless turnon is ok out of pure spite #this morning i was absolutely radiating stress #i have a friend who shows up so we can walk together to school and she could tell smth was off lol #i literally could not hide it at all even if i wanted too #i kept pulling my hat over my face thats the main way you can tell that im stressed #not that it really matters that you know that bc none of you are ever gonna witness that but. fun fact abt me ig #ugh #if turnon dies i am gonna cry so hard <333 #and i wont finish the animation <333333333 #(at this point just trying anything to get turnon back)#im gonna make a word doc #i make word docs when im stressed /hj #quick question turnip : is there a way to get turnon out of the situation he is in or is he just gonna die and theres nothing we can do #about it /gen #because i have a sneaky suspicion that we cant actually do anything about this #i swear to god #LETS LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE!!#A DEFRAG MIGHT COME OUT TMR!!#its been 21 days and a defrag takes on average 20-25 days #ough #turnip and addon im gonna find where you live and i will burn your respective houses down

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kimmkitsuragi · 2 months ago

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tbf it hasn't even been a Month since i came here but it's soooo embarrassing to say "sorry can u speak english :(" to everyone who ever talks to me ever

#each day im like ok this time i will Try to at least start with something like #förlåt jag kan inte prata svenska bra :( or something simple like that #and each time i still go for the um sorry i can't speak swedish :( sjdjdjd #and the sad thing is obviously it's hard to learn and speak a language #but for simple things it's Not Hard to understand (at least for me)#the speaking tho. rip #like the dude asked me when is the bus coming and i Understood that he asked me when the bus is coming #and i was still like sorry i will answer u in english... i understand u just asked me abt the bus time but i cant speak swedish so i will #just say it in english.. sorry.....#in these kinda basic sentences it's pretty understandable + u can just assume things from the context anf #fill in the blanks even if u didnt Fully understand each word or whatever #but ughhh i need to Speakkkkk #also obviously when some friends are talking among each other i cannot understand shit other than a few basic words lol #im just able to catch basic stuff so far which is. i think good for 1 month? isnt it??? lmao #i feel sooo good when some staff at the market or whatever tell me something in swedish and i can sorta understand #and it's something i dont have to reply so i can just nod and say okay im like yippieeee this is language learning right #(she aint learning shit)#also lovelyyy to be able to understand signs and ads etc when i go to shops yayyyy #when will i be able to take sfi classes pls i need someone to force me to speak #🗒#the epic highs and lows of learning a language #(kinda??)

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