#did i mention it has british emily???

[irrrationalfangirl]

welcome emily henry fans. please stream my lady jane on prime so we can get a season 2.

[thetreetopinn]

Sources for Somerton's Plagiarism from Hbomberguy's Video (as much as I could get)

I went back through Harry's video, focused entirely on the sources James Somerton pulled from in the hopes of creating as much of a comprehensive list as I could--though my Google-Fu is not very strong. I did however find something I thought was forever lost and that made me very happy--specifically the magazine Midlands Zone containing the column by Steven Spinks that Harry poignantly used as an illustration of gay erasure... while Somerton uses it to sound like HE is waxing remorseful about the very subject.

This is not a complete list, I'm sure. For one thing, I was only able to attempt to pull sources that Harry himself mentioned in the video. Surely there's so very much more out there. I expect there to be a great deal more internet archeology to unearth just how much writing and culture Somerton has stolen like he's the British Museum of Natural History but for gay people.

- - - - -

Harry's list of mentioned youtubers:

Alexander Avila - https://www.youtube.com/@alexander_avila Matt Baume - https://www.youtube.com/@MattBaume Khadija Mbowe - https://www.youtube.com/@KhadijaMbowe Lady Emily - https://www.youtube.com/@LadyEmilyPresents Shanspeare - https://www.youtube.com/@Shanspeare RickiHirsch - https://www.youtube.com/@RickiHirsch VerilyBitchie - https://www.youtube.com/@verilybitchie

Harry created a convenient playlist of videos by these and other people he wants to bring to everyone's attention.

Please give them your support.

- - - - -

Midlands Zone Magazine - Column by Steven Spinks

After a great deal of searching, I found an archive of the "Midlands Zone" magazine, where you can read through past issues dating all the way back to February 2014. I have also found the issue from which Somerton took Spinks' poignant discussion of gay erasure: Overall archive Specific Issue - Pages 16-17

It will not allow you to download it, but you can read it exactly as it appeared in print form.

- - - - -

My best effort to find the exact book or article Somerton lifted from to be able to get attention to the original writers

Tinker Bells and Evil Queens By Sean Griffin

The Celluloid Closet By Vito Russo Wikipedia article about the book Wikipedia article about the documentary My weak google-fu could not find where you can access the book or documentary. Check your local municipal or university library for book or documentary, or if you know a good source for one or both, please reblog with it added

Camp and the Gay Sensibility By Jack Babuscio

The Groundbreaking Queerness of Disney's Mulan By Jes Tom Personal site with links to social media accounts

Why Rebel Without a Cause was a milestone for gay rights By Peter Howell

Why "The Craft" is still the best Halloween coming out movie By Andrew Park

Opinion: From facehuggers to phallic tails, is 'Alien' one of the queerest films ever? By Dani Leever

Women and Queerness in Horror: Jennifer's Body By Zoe Fortier

[Pride 2019] We Have Such Sights to Show You: Hellraiser and the Spectrum of Queerness By Alejandra Gonzalez

Revealing the Hellbound Heart of Clive Barker's 'Hellraiser' By Colin Arason

Queering James Cameron's Aliens (1986) By Bart Bishop

Demeter and Persephone in space: transformation, femininity, and myth in the 'Alien' films By David Greven

Fears of a millennial masculinity: Scream's queer killers By David Greven (Scholarly site, unable to access original work, offers a way to request a full copy of the text in PDF)

Queer Subtext in Stephen King's It - Part 1: 'Reddie' Character Analysis By Rachel Brands Rachel is the very unfortunate lady who found out she was being stolen from because she supported Somerton through Patreon and saw one of his videos early with her writing--lacking any form of citation or credit

How 'It: Chapter Two' Leaves Richie Tozier Behind By Joelle Monique

When Horror Becomes Strength: Queer Armor in Stephen King's 'IT' By Alex London

Why Queer People Love Witchcraft By Amanda Kohr

'The Favourite' Queers The Past And The Present By Giorgi Plys-Garzotto

(Wuko) Crush (Mako x Wu) By MoonFlower on YouTube

5 Terrible Movies With Awesome Hidden Meanings By J.F. Sargent

The Radicalization of Sexuality: The Queer Casae of Jeffrey Dahmer By Ian Barnard

Netflix's 'Dahmer' backlash highlights ethical issues in the platform's obsession with true crime By Shivani Dubey

The Possible Disturbing Dissonance Between Hajime Isayama's Beliefs and Attack on Titan's Themes Original Article by "Seldom Musings" (Author has made all posts not related to Attack On Titan private and has retired from the blog)

Everyone Loves Attack on Titan. So Why Does Everyone Hate Attack on Titan? By Gita Jackson

- - - - -

The following people are otherwise named in the video. There are no direct citations of articles or books by them in said video. I am unable to guarantee that I have identified the correct individual.

Darren Elliott-Smith Michaela Barton David Church Claire Sisco King Amanda Howell Jessica Roy

- - - - -

Telos announced and cancelled a film likely based on this book: The Final Girl Support Group - By Grady Hendrix

- - - - -

I refrained from including certain sources.

First off only focusing on Somerton's work.

Secondly not including anything that might be visible enough to not require amplifying their voice (I cannot speak for all of those I have found links to, but journalism is frequently a thankless job).

Thirdly any source that is of a nature that is antithetical to the very existence of the queer community, such as the right-leaning source that didn't make it into Somerton's video, but Harry was able to identify as a source he had considered using.

If you feel I have missed a mentioned source--or you know of a source from material that was not covered in Harry's video--please do not hesitate to reblog with added details.

- - - - -

Please share this information far and wide, and please add to it if you find more material that can be positively identified and linked to the creator/writer.

[sorencd]

IF I FELL

pairing: neil perry x reader

word count: 0.7k

a/n: a small something i wanted to do with neil! have i ever mentioned i lovrhfed himdahsd asdh

masterlist

sitting at a table with your friends surrounding you trying to pretend that you weren’t looking at the person across from where you were wasn’t exactly the easiest thing to do, especially when most of them can’t keep their mouth shut. you could feel the subtle jab to your side one of your friends, danielle, was giving you when she noticed you were staring beyond the table and wasn’t listening to a thing she was saying.

“stop- stop that.” you dismissively waved your hand to try and stop her from elbowing your side.

emily, another friend of yours, started making jokes about how you’ve got your eyes set on someone and pointed a finger at where you were previously looking. you denied her accusations before cautiously turning your head to the direction she was indicating, acting as if you weren’t staring there a moment ago. to no surprise, it was him, the boy you’ve been fawning over like a little girl who’s had her first crush. this little fixation of yours has been going on for months but you never found it in yourself to act upon it since you knew little about him. all you knew of was that he attended the academy nearby and you’ve never seen him alone or without any of his friends. you’ve come to find out however a few weeks back that his name was neil, a name that made you perk your head up whenever anyone mentions it, no matter if it was related to him or not. it was love at first sight, your friends would say, and they’ve never seen you as smitten as you are now. 

you rested your chin on your palm to better concentrate at his face—or smile, rather. you thought that he had the best smile in town, brighter than any other you’ve seen. you bet that if he were to smile at you directly, your heart wouldn’t handle any of it and stop beating right then and there. you can only dream about that happening.

“he’s a proper dishy lad, isn’t he?” 

you scrunched your nose at danielle who was trying her best british impression, she’s been reading too much books from that tolkien guy. you really should take those books away from her. you continued your faux act of not knowing anything, avoiding her teasing gaze with a shrug to your shoulders.

“what? i have no idea who you’re talking about. i was just-” it was hard to get out words that would help you defend yourself when your head was busy being occupied by him. you felt that no adjective could perfectly express what you thought of him and if you opened your mouth, you’d accidentally slip and say something about neil instead. 

"i-i don’t know.”

they all shared a knowing look while you continued staring at him as he leaned onto a tree he was at. he had his mouth closed and was seemingly listening intently to what one of the boys was saying. what a perfect set up, you thought. he could just continue what he was doing, and you would just admire him from afar. unfortunately, your daydreaming was cut short when unexpectedly, neil turned his attention to where you sat and for a brief moment, you two made eye contact. you felt the air in your lungs get ripped away from you and your heart thump faster. he gave you a smile that you thought only came in your dreams accompanied by a wink before diverting his gaze and pitched into the conversation they were having, leaving you red and blushing with a thousand questions running in your mind. why would he look at you? did he know the whole time? your friends started giggling amongst themselves as they saw the whole thing unfold.

“looks like that boy you like fancies you back~.” danielle resumed elbowing your arm and wiggled her eyebrows, “i think he likes you too.” 

“don’t- no, he doesn’t. something just got caught in his eye, that’s all.” you reasoned, also half-lying to yourself to try and stop you from leading yourself on. you didn’t want to expect from someone who probably doesn’t even know who you are, probably already liked another person, and most likely would never talk to you. 

on the other side of the park though, unbeknownst to you, neil was watching you try to explain yourself to your group with a smile. he should ask you on a date soon, he contemplated to himself, before someone else beats him to it. 

© sorencd . 2023 ─ do not copy, repost, translate or claim any of my works as your own.

[cherrytinz]

Hello, I really like your character and I’m curious do you have any story on your oc if so, I would love to hear it (:

Hello darling! First of all, thank you so much! It really makes me happy that people like my ocs! It really means a lot. Not to mention that I was generally surprised to see that so many liked Lucy's design! thanks yall! I was so happy to read those comments 🖤

And well, yeah! I want to write a fanfic with her so I have a few things planned. Lucy is an old oc frommmm 2019, but I decided to bring her back to life with a redising and all 🦇

Soooooo Lucy Fernby is a British girl who was born in 1975. Her parents are quite famous musical artists (especially her father) so she always had an approach to music. Actually, Lucy has absolute pitch and ease with some instruments, however she prefers to play the bass and write songs to cope with certain emotions that she doesn't know how to share. If I had to assign her a voice, I would say that she speaks like Gwen of Total Drama but with a British accent (although certainly Serena's voice from downtown is still an option lmao) , and when she sings it would sound like Mary Elizabeth McGlynn.

Even so, her parents (Emily, a goth singer and Luke, a rock band guitarist) got divorced when she was still a child. Her father returns to the USA but still tries to be as present in her life as possible. Despite this, due to a situation that Lucy does not want to talk about, they distance themselves when she is 14. I CLARIFY because I know it is very ambiguous, no, her father did not hurt her or anything, only Lucy keeps everything to herself.

Lucy had a lot of problems that affected her way of relating to others, both with people of her age and with her own parents. Due to a series of bad decisions she misses the school year and that's when her mother decides that it is best to send her to live with her father so that she can get away from "the toxic environment she is in."

(conclusion that Emily draws after brief questions that Lucy did not develop when she answering)

This is how Lucy ends up going to live with her father at the Addison Apartments because well, a rock star who lives in a town that no one knows = peace of mind and time which he can dedicate to his daughter and himself!

oh, another fun fact of her! A year before moving to the Addison Apartments, she had a platonic friend/crush named Meri with whom she lost connection. I mention this because Lucy has a tendency to isolate herself when something happens and simply end a relationship instead of fighting for it, which she did at the time with Sally and the rest of the gang, but she has learned to be more open about how she feels.

thanks for asking! just in case, if anyone is interested feel free to ask me anything abt my ocs or even if you want to know my headcanons of Sally Face (in this case bc im in others fandoms like BG3 and Gorillaz) I'm more than happy to share them 💖💖💖

[wizardshark]

For the DnD nerds who care about the rules a lot:

This is a 1 on 1 fight that contains 3 rounds. You win one fight, you go to the next round. At the start of the tournament everyone has taken a long rest, and between each round they get only a short rest.

Propaganda both for AND against in the readmore.

Adaine Abernant

For: Wizards have been the strongest class since 1st edition and it ain't changing now baby. One portent roll for each fight is enough to guarantee a turn to cast a wizard save-or-suck spell.

Against: This girl killed one person ONE time and had a break down about it, has frequent panic attacks, and her AC is 15. She has no real defensive options and will die as all wizards die: with an axe in their nervous system.

Fabian Aramais Seacaster

For: Short rests? Sounds like a fighter's adventuring day! Three attacks + superiority dice + spell slot smiting + Action surge to do it again is killing everyone but Gorgug before they can even get a turn.

Against: Melee fighters, famously, can't do shit all if you stand over there ->, and a single reroll for a save-or-suck isn't going to be very much against any spellcaster who, dare I say, casts more than 1 (that is, one) spell in the fight. Insult his dad and bait him into doing something stupid, GG EZ

Figueroth Faeth

For: Literal archdemon resists the biggest energy damage types, tons of spell slots and warlock shenanigans to play you like a fiddle, then smite you to death when you're finally just trying to get anything done.

Against: "I have no single target DAMAGE" - quote from Emily. This bitch got no single target damage and these are 1 v 1 fights. Yeah Paladins can nova but they have no spell slot regeneration, after the first fight, which you KNOW she will spam her whole arsenal, girl will be all out of resources. More likely to disguise self to be the referee and skateboard away.

Gorgug Thistlespring

For: Did you see him solo a purple worm in the last stand?? Able to concentrate on artificer spells while in a rage too. THE classic 1v1 class, resists your damage and crits you every turn.

Against: Single minded to the extreme. Spellcasting is the classic counter to an angy barbarian. Yeah he has mindless rage, poor Fig, but anyone with any CC that isn't a charm effect won't even give him a target to try to charge down. Mention his parent's lawnmower and defeat him while he is distracted.

Kristen Applebees

For: Clerics are strong! We can pretend all we like that healers are boring but she can hit you hard and keep herself topped out on HP, AC, Save bonuses, and do you in with spirit guardians and spiritual weapon with no problem. You see the muscles on that girl? The gay one, I mean, not the straight british one.

Against: 4 dexterity

Riz "The Ball" Gukgak

For: These bitches are BLIND blind. Reliable talent stealth checks puts him above 20 every time. Sneak attack damage won't explode anyone but the most squishy, but is extremely reliable with a bonus action hide. He will eat your bones.

Against: Actual skill monkey. He has a cool gun but he's an arcane trickster built for non-combat. Investigate an arm around his neck and pickpocket a knife into his belly and you've got the win easy. Man couldn't even get onto the owl bears until there was no one left to swap in except him. Will probably be too exhausted to put up a good fight.

[chilling-seavey]

hi emily!! hope you’re doing well recently! i came into your inbox for some tips and advice actually, because you’re the perfect person i could think of for this lol.

i have a few george blurbs coming up for my kinktober, and i’ve admittedly never written for him before! i was wondering if the #1 george writer herself had any tips or pointers for writing him, how he acts ect 😌

thank you in advance!! 🫶

Oh my goodness gracious catch me twirling my hair giggling right now 🤭

I was literally just stalking your kinktober list and literally let out a little squeal at the fact there are George things in the works omgomg we love the GR exposure! So excited!!

In all honesty, the best tip I can give you, is watch interviews and videos! Don't listen to what he says as much as how he says it; how he says it with his mouth, with his hands, the movement of his eyes, his head. I've noticed he's really into eye contact. Even in interviews he'll just stare almost unblinking at the person talking and then generally look away when he starts to answer/is in thought (most often he looks to his left? See here. I'm not creepy, I swear). Recently I've noticed if he's surprised, he'll repeat what the person said in a bit of a higher tone (see here or here). Did I mention eye contact? Eye contact.

OH and he has very pronounced and expressive eyebrows. Eyebrow furrow is a must in situations that warrants it in writing him. Confusion, concern, focus - could be a good one. Little tongue between the lips in concentration, eyebrows furrowed in focus... ahem. Again, you can kind of extrapolate this information if you watch some interviews on mute and just watch his expressions. That's my best suggestion for body language and subtle actions that can really make his character.

I'm no professional at British terminology/dialects (I'm far too Canadian for that) so I kind of just wing it based on what I gather from videos of him talking. I often try to make his dialogue a bitttt more formal sounding because he seems to really enunciate sometimes which is better expressed in writing through the odd removal of a contraction (don't vs do not) but only very, very sparingly because he's also not from the 19th century LOL.

I know he has silly sayings sometimes which I use only once or twice in a piece of writing, often as a fleeting insight into his persona or as comedic relief just for the reader but definitely not too often and not as the focus (and tbh I just wrote him unironically saying "it's raining cats and dogs out there" in my current WIP which feels so on point for him imo lmao idioms are good ones).

I also see him very polite in public, watching his words, his swearing to a minimum if at all - but then in private I think he can swear like a fucking sailor but would never let the world know that of course. Take that as you will in regards to smut writing ahem.

And for smut more specifically, I definitely see him leaning into that auditory side, really into that low, rolling, husky dirty talk. Lots of sweet pet names, very soft dom if you're going dom (I'm very exited to see which way you take the body worship one-). As a reference, I think my best George smut for dirty talk etc. (based on my own bias as well as reader feedback) is this one. I don't really see him into hard kinks and things but sometimes that's fun to explore too so all the power to you if that's in your plan!! We put the fiction in fanfiction after all [and once I get an answer out of IRL him on where he stands on the BDSM scale, I'll get back to you. I mean what-]

I feel like I have so much more I could add but this was all off the top of my head...and took thirty minutes whoops...if I think of more, I'll add it to this ask LOL

[upslapmeal]

Rogue

Hey did you know this episode is going to be a bit Bridgerton? Not sure if the trailers ever mentioned it

gotta love an ep that starts with a bit of murder

just realised this is only the second non-RTD ep

I guess a shorter series means fewer eps for other writers :/

Fifteen and Ruby looking excellent!

‘try not to get engaged’ yeah you’d know about that wouldn’t you Doc. don't go giving anyone cocoa

‘does not-a-lord have a name?’ getting the Ken accent out

lmao they’re even doing the Bridgeton thing of playing covers of pop songs

surely going to send the Doctor Who Is A TV Show theorists wild

as well as Susan Twist being ‘just an actor playing several roles’

(RTD you absolute liar)

I haven't really been following the theory other than being vaguely aware of its existence but can you imagine if 'it's the only actor we could get' ended up as the in-universe explanation for her

‘you travel in a shed? why isn’t it cloaked’ get rekt

getting sad Captain Jack vibes

‘my name’s bond. molecular bond’

‘was that a wee smile from the most serious man in history?’ och aye

all the doctors!!!

shalka doctor???

‘come with me and you’ll be in a world of pure imagination’ Ncuti said he wanted to be Wonka or the Doctor!!

Fifteen: we've both lost everyone we've loved. hot.

Doctor bit of advice. your sad comments about losing everyone are slightly undercut by going :DD that's my best friend!! when asked about the person you're with lol

('I lost everyone. everyone I travelled with. ok the last one I just kinda told to go away because I was changing my face but yeah)

you know given that the jukebox is literally the only bit of furniture Fifteen has it would be nice if it was used like……ever

‘we can’t kill it so we’ll send it to a random barren dimension to die a slow isolated death!’ good old Doctor logic

‘tv signals beam out across the stars’ ok I genuinely have only come across the tv theory in passing but 👀

it is…interesting that they’ve gone for a kinda Bridgerton-style casting after last week’s ep…

if the chuldur had been wearing the duchess longer I’d have imagined it was engineered to look like Bridgerton but that’s not the case

Cameca in the distance like oh no not again

‘start wars with anyone who doesn’t look British!’ tbh I think they were managing that without the chuldur

oh no… Emily is going to be one of them isn’t she

that explains her just explaining social rules to Ruby earlier instead of being surprised she was even asking! that struck me as odd but I thought it was just the writing being a bit clunky

RUBY NO!!!

oh Doctor :( jinxed when you made that promise to keep her safe

‘your…birdiness’

wait wait oh no

ruby’s going to be pretending isn’t she

it’s why she’s the only one who still looks human

it'll have been interference from the earrings or something

yesss it was the earrings!

oh Ruby so willing to go :(

Doctor now is not the time for smooching!!!

well. that was a simpler fix than I expected

Fifteen: I’m fine!!!! ((((:

gotta love a big ol' hug

Fun! Silly! What other tv show could have serious thread villains with bird faces talking about cosplaying the world to death. Excellent. (In honesty not as good as the last few eps but enjoyably ridiculous with a decent dollop of heart)

[idsfantasy]

So, bear with me, this is gonna be a bit wild.

Setup (Things that we know from the games):

Fallfest had canonical appearances in 1970 and 1983

The FNAF 4 house can be seen on a hill overlooking the Fallfest 1983

A car that has purple aesthetics similar to the purple car of Midnight Motorist and Later That Night is there

Fallfest (as of 1983) seems to be a Carnival consisting of a barn (HW1 and HW2), a Carousal (HW2), and a Shooting Gallery (HW2)

Mystic Hippo and Carnie also fit the carnival theme (as fortune tellers were popular in carnivals and carnies... well, obvious), and both have Henry's animatronic hinged design.

Adjacently, several of the subtitles mention a 'Carnival Nurse' as well in the Patch game of HW2

Glitchtrap seems to be a handsewn costume that is implied to be William Afton's first official Spring Bonnie costume

Fredbear singing show was a thing in 1930's, with a dancing bear that would be around in Carnivals

Mrs. Afton has never been seen in-game or stories, barring the STAFF bot recreation in Security Breach (where she sits at the head of the table and William Afton looks like he's dressed as a carnival ring master), and possibly is represented by Clara in Immortal and the Restless, as well as maybe Balora.

Balora has the appearance of a Ballet Dancer, who also did tight-rope stunts in circuses and carnivals.

Clara sets her and Vlad's house on fire when she grows sick of Vlad's lies

The fire that hits the Carousal starts at the barn of Fallfest 1983 (and may be tied to the Shooting Gallery also going up in flames)

Charlie and Crying Child are both implied to have died in 1983

William Afton is British (I promise this will matter)

The Theory:

In 1930's USA, Fallfest has become a yearly tradition in Hurricane, Utah, headed by an average midwestern family who were popular in the town. This Fallfest included Fredbear, the dancing bear. This carnival would take place on their family farm, and included games in their own barn.

At some point in time, possibly 1970, an aspiring British showman - named William Afton - arrives from the UK to look for entertainment possibilities in Utah, where he met a woman (referred to as Clara for convenience) who was running Fallfest in the city as part of generations of her family, while also doing performances as a tight rope dancer.

He shortly married her soon after and had 3 kids: Micheal Afton, the Crying Child, and Elizabeth Afton.

Working at the Fallfest was an engineer named Henry Emily, who was building animatronics for the carnival, and worked with William to design the first of their characters: Spring Bonnie, Fredbear, and what would eventually be known as the Mediocre Melodies (and maybe Chica, Sun, and Moon as well).

The popularity of these mascot characters made the Aftons and Emily's a great amount of profit from each Fallfest and enough of a push to start their own Fredbear Diner, where William and Henry created the Springlock Suits/Animatronics.

TV shows were made, lunchboxes were made, masks were made, merch was doing good.

Over the years, rumors would surface of the mascots coming to life and stealing children, but they were baseless rumors. Still, enough to scare the Crying Child - who had seen his own father putting Henry into a suit for work - and likely may have inspired the idea of calling Fallfest a 'Spookfest' for Halloween by the public.

In 1983, Micheal Afton and his buddies (including Bonnie Bro/possibly Cassy's Dad) stuffed the Crying Child into Fredbear's mouth and put him into a coma, where he would eventually die from his injuries.

In 1983 of that year, William Afton - mad with grief and possibly rage/jealousy at Henry - found Charlie Emily (Henry's daughter) locked up outside. After luring her with the promise of help, he violently killed her in a rage and drove off.

In 1983, as Fallfest approached, William is confronted by Clara. Henry had his suspicions about his friend, and Clara had noted the timing of William getting home that day and how suspicious it was that they would both lose a child in the same year at the same place.

William refuses to admit to anything, gaslighting her, pointing out that there is no evidence. Their marriage goes rocky, both of them angry and grieving, and Clara notes how empty the house feels despite it still being full of people (William retreats into his work, Micheal is traumatized, and Elizabeth is too young to understand what is going on).

In 1983, during the Fallfest of 1983, Clara Afton finds evidence of William's murder of Charlie in the Barn setup for the patrons. Maybe it was a weapon. Maybe it was something led to her by the spirits or the Shadows of William's Dark Deeds. Maybe it was her son, saying 'It's Me' in a way only she could figure out.

Perhaps William is there, the two of them having one final confrontation.

In 1983, Fallfest, Clara sets the barn on fire in an attempt to kill herself and her husband. Out of shame? Out of anger? Out of fear if he tells her his plans for putting their dead son back together?

Maybe none of it. Maybe all of it.

In any case, the fire spread, engulfing the barn and hitting the Carousel and its occupants. Panic ensues as Fallfest goes up in flames, animatronics and games burning... and William Afton escaping with his life.

Clara, does not.

(Obviously this is all just a theory, but I wondered why Mrs. Afton seems to be simultaneously left out of the story beyond animatronic/cartoon parallels, and that at least one of those parallels had her burning their house down. Obviously a barn isn't a house, but it's interesting that we see the fire start at the barn in 1983, close to the FNAF 4 home, and Clara is the only female character who sets fire to a home.)

(Also, obviously, if one believes in the Mrs. Afton running Fazbear now - since the way it's structured is meant for family businesses - then this goes against that theory, barring William Afton also resurrecting her in some capacity but I don't want to get into that.)

I don't necessarily agree with certain things, and it's kinda hard for me to have opinions on other things since we don't have a ton of evidence for what happened there, but it's interesting to think about.

[mercurygray]

Currently Reading - November 2023

Gosh, it's been a little while since I did one of these!

The Year of Peril: America in 1942 - Tracey Campbell . Found this one at the library booksale just after I finished the 1942 podcast series. The book is excellent so far and really flipping some interesting issues over.

Just Finished Reading:

Millions Like Us: Women's Lives during the Second World War by Virgina Nicolson - This was excellent and I strongly recommend it. I got a lot of inspiration for the end of TDS in it and there's a lot of material that I think will come in handy for MOTA.

Sisters in Arms: British Army Nurses Tell Their Story, by Nicola Tyrer - Another super excellent book that filled in a serious knowledge gap I had about British nursing. Might come in handy for future SAS:RH productions.

An Unladylike Profession: American Women War Correspondents in World War I by Chris Dubbs - This was an impulse purchase on thriftbooks and was very interesting.

The Call of the Wrens, by Jenni Walsh. Fiction. Glad this was only a library book - it was just okay. I'm not a big fan of time jumps as a narrative device - it feels thin.

Cassiel's Servant, by Jacqueline Carey. Fiction. It was really fun to go back to Terre D'Ange for this one, and interesting to see Joscelin's side of things. Realized Joscelin may be why/how I write Dick the way I do.

Ashes under water : the SS Eastland and the shipwreck that shook America, by Michael McCarthy. This was a book club pick that I ended up not being able to join discussion on. A really interesting story, if you're into maritime disasters.

Prisoners of the castle : an epic story of survival and escape from Colditz, the Nazis' fortress prison, by Ben Macintyre. This was on the shelf at the library and I was reading mostly for mentions of David Stirling. Still - very interesting, especially when paired with...

Churchill's Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare: The Mavericks Who Plotted Hitler's Defeat, by Giles Milton. This book was fascinating. A lot of backstory behind the stuff that made the war work.

The Immortal life of Henrietta Lacks, by Rebecca Skloot. A book club pick that I'm really glad I read.

Just Finished Watching:

Our Miracle Years (Unsere wunderbaren Jahre, Das Erste/PBS) - follows the life of one family in the post-war period. Some good food for thought here.

A Place to Call Home, Season 1 (Foxtel/ Hoopla) - More post-war, this time in Australia, which I started just as something to watch and am now very embroiled in. (Fair warning, this show contains conversation therapy, a miscarriage, and antisemitism, and may probably be triggering for some.)

World On Fire, Season 2 (BBC/PBS) - I came, I brought my Passport subscription, I tried...and after all six episodes I still don't like this show. I don't feel like we spend enough time with any of the characters to really appreciate them. It feels like everyone's there to make a point.

Outlander Season 7 (STARZ) - This was just fun. I'm not a huge fan of the books, but the TV series is really enjoyable for me.

Captain Horatio Hornblower (1951) - This has been on my list for a while and it popped up recently on Hoopla. I like Peck's nervousness in the role.

Dalgliesh, Season 2 (Acorn/Hoopla) - Bertie Carvel continues to do great in this role. I kind of wish there was a crossover involving him and Morse.

To Walk Invisible (BBC/ PBS)- It was really fun to watch this back to back with Emily.

Emily (2022) - Getting two mostly recent takes on the Bronte sisters so close together was really interesting.

Farewell My Queen (2012) - watched this while on vacation in Williamsburg. A nice 18th century drama.

[sweetangelanon]

Stir Crazy Au; Part: 2 Birds of a Feather Flock Together

This is Henry's introduction to the lore and also his wife WHO plays a much bigger part then before and will need her own post oh god mary ann im sorry girl we are we are going through it tonight.

Meet Henry Emily, local 12 year old boy who's just one of the many outcasts in a big city school (insert whatever state I pick later Maybe Missouri) Meet Henry Emily's history teacher who is about to change this kids life forever. Debatable if it's for the better or for worse. As you can expect Henry is bullied, and bullied hard. It's the 50's and his last name is Emily so ofc he's having all the slurs thrown at him along with rocks. He doesn't know what he did wrong, or how he can change it, he tries to change it but things just seem to stay the same no matter the age. So, his history teacher in a form of support points Henry, and his parents to a pen pal program. This is where Henry meets his best friend, maybe even some (I am some) would dare to say platonic soulmate, William Afton.

Unlike what this opening suggests they are far from friends when the letter writing first starts out. Will is being forced to write these letters for an English project, and does what every pissed off 12 year old does when they are forced to do something they don't like. He complains about it. A lot. Basically baiting Henry into an argument as a way to try to make up an excuse for why he can't do the project. (can't do the project if the person writing you is mad an uncooperative, right?) and boy howdy do words fly. This time it's a mix of biting witt, (as much wit as you can get from kids) Slurs (its the 50's idk what you expected not to mention kids don't know how deep slurs are they're kids repeating stuff that they just know is bad words to get a reaction out of someone an to be seen as grown up) the most baseless name calling and idiotic reasoning for a grudge you have ever seen. Now, dear reader of this post you may ask... "But- but why would Henry keep writing back, he was looking for a friend. Wouldn't he just quit and try to get connected to someone else."

To that I say simply this: William just so happened to be the straw that broke the camels back. As you can imagine this is YEARS of pent up rage and upset coming out of him after so long directed at a person who can take it and still comes back. (Granted he's forced to write back in these beginning letters but I digress.) During one of their many letter fights William mentions something that Henry has never heard of before (some British slang probs) which stops him in his tracks leading him to ask questions. Will replies in turn and suddenly this argumentative back and forth letter writing that had been going on for at least three months turns into a civil conversation. They simply seem to forget what they where doing lost in the interest of just how different the other's life is.

They both really want to meet each other in person but both parents are hesitant for different reasons. Also it doesn’t help the cost of tickets either way is expensive… So the two just have to be content with writing one another and sending pictures of each other. Now while the two aren’t on similar levels of…. Freak. Henry does have some less than stellar traits himself like the fact he finds no issue in recording someone who isn’t aware as long as it’s deemed for their safety. He’s pretty much able to wave some morals/respecting privacy if he thinks what he’s doing is way more important and will actively protect the other. Maybe a tad bit of stalking, but not as bad as William. He is NOT climbing through unlocked windows to get to his romantic interest. But, he would be following them around work/campus and constantly trying to talk to them, writing down notes of things they liked. Henry please….. Will and Henry probably talk about their lovers document- well actually more like Will does because when Henry talks about the doc he has on Mary Ann Will gets weirdly quiet and it gets weird (it’s because he hates that it’s not him </3) Mary Ann obviously doesn’t know Henry has this doc about her and she would most likely throw up and cry if she did. Now, to the bit I have been dying to write. Hehheeh- So, unlike Will who basically dropped everything and got married to his... 'girlfriend' is a questionable title since they weren’t dating before they decided to get married but okay… (They don’t get married until they reach America but forget all that we are here for MARY ANN.) Henry, has been dating Mary Ann ever since High School. They were high school sweethearts (church sweethearts) and before he left for college he proposed. She said yes, and the two agreed to get married after he finishes school. The issue? Henry had some… eye opening experiences at college, one of them being he realized he likes men. (Bisexual king) This weighs heavily on him since he’s not sure what Mary Ann would think about it. He lives on his own in an apartment and is going through said life crisis until he ignores it in favor of the fact William just showed up on his doorstep. But, even after the joy of meeting his best friend in person the issues still stand and it can’t be ignored forever.

Henry comes to the bright (no it’s not) conclusion that while he’s learned something new about himself he still very much loves Mary Ann and still wants to marry her. Just, maybe not right after college. William is cheering his head off (mentally) while Mary Ann grows more annoyed, and a bit scared of the thought of Henry leaving her. Not out of a place of love, though she tries to trick herself into believing it is, but from the fear of being seen as impure, as a woman thrown to the side, someone used where it will be harder for her to find a husband because of it. So, this turns into eight years where the church and his and her family are annoyed by it, and Henry keeps finding ways to push it off. (William tries to sabotage their relationship and fails) Mary Ann during these long eight years gets twitchy, worried that her perfect wedding, with a house an white picket fence an 1 child will be dashed away. What’s not helping her anxiety is the fact that everyone at church has something to say about the situation. There's an equal mix of people being blunt while others are passive aggressive with her to tear down her self esteem and belittle her. The pressure she’s being put under is mounting, she keeps getting treated badly at church for her unmarried status to the point she does something DEEPLY unthinkable to speed up the process. It goes against her religion, and everything she was taught. She has sex with Henry out of wedlock. She grieves after it, she feels tainted, impure. (There is so much to unpack from that babe) But, it had to be done in her eyes. Her plan was to claim she’s pregnant to rush the wedding as no one wants to have a baby out of wedlock. Her plan goes on without a hitch and the two finally get married. William hates every second of the ceremony. <3  The only issue was the pretend miscarriage but surprisingly William helped in that regard. And, by helped I mean he was a clingy little asshole and kept drawing Henry’s attention away from her (which he felt suuper guilty about post her ‘miscarriage’ feeling like it was his fault but babe it’s all fake I wonder if I should let him find that out that’d be pretty cool) Of course she can’t stay childless forever but the idea of having children is… daunting.

She won’t admit it to herself, but she doesn’t want to have any children.

[turningsaintsintotheseax]

Dear streaming services and broadcast channels; sapphic representation is important too…

When I think back to my baby gay days, there are a lot of difficult memories, heartbreak, rejection, and lonely moments. However, some of my happier moments, those glimmers of feeling safe and normal in a world that so often made me feel the opposite, came from media representation. Back in 2010 there wasn’t anywhere near the level of sapphic media representation that there is now, but there was enough.

I was more blessed than those born just a few years before me. I have a friend who is just five years older than me, and for her there was one sapphic media representation she could relate to- just one.

Coronation Street’s Sophie and Sian and Skins’ Naomi and Emily were my saving Grace. It might seem extreme, but I would sometimes count the hours down to be home from school to watch either of these. I’d spent six hours wanting to crawl inside a hole and feeling that I was carrying a secret that everyone secretly knew and hated me for. Yet I could go home and immerse myself into someone’s else’s relationship that made mine feel so much more normal. I don’t doubt that media representation saved my life in more ways than one, and for that I have so much to thank broadcasters for. However there is a hidden dark side to sapphic representation on TV.

While no one can deny that sapphic and wlw media representation has become much more common over time. The bizzare trends that seem to curse sapphic characters are ongoing.

Let’s start with the original trend, referred to as #buryyourgays and essentially outlining the frequency at which lesbian and bisexual characters were killed off in popular tv shows. As of February 2023, a grand total of 225 (and counting) wlw TV show characters had been killed off. I’m not going to list them all, because no one has time to read that, but I will outline the ones that hit hard (for me).

Tara - Buffy The Vampire Slayer (2002)

Tosh - Torchwood (2008)

Sarah Barnes - Hollyoaks (2009)

Cat - Lip Service (2012)

Maya - Pretty Little Liars (2012)

Naomi - Skins (2013)

Emily - Teen Wolf (2013)

Catriona - Doctors (2014)

Maddie Heath - Coronation Street (2015)

Lexa - The 100 (2016)

Nora and Mary Louise - The Vampire Diaries (2016)

Poussey - Orange is the New Black (2016)

Rana Habeeb- Coronation Street (2019)

Tina Carter - Eastenders (2020)

I mean, the list goes on…

And the impact is huge. When you are a lost and lonely youth, these characters do become your saving grace and sense of normality. As I previously mentioned, Skins had the biggest impact on my life and were actually praised by the sapphic community for appearing to break the #buryyourgays trend. So what did they do? Brought Naomi back in a one off spin off series. To kill her off. Tragically. Come on now!

British soaps. I’m a big fan. It’s a guilty pleasure! The soaps have a huge platform to spread awareness and inclusivity, and let’s be fair, they often do. However the trend remains prominent. Eastenders killed off it’s longest running lesbian character in the last couple of years. Coronation Street killed off one half of two of the three lesbian couples to be featured and Hollyoaks killed off Sarah Barnes way back in the day and are currently stabbing us all in the heart with Juliet’s upcoming death.

The British soaps are getting somewhere with their representation of male gay characters, which is good. I mean, it would be nice for it to be all communities but perhaps this means it’s coming. In fact, over its 38 years worth of episodes, Eastenders has cast an impressive 20 male gay and bisexual main characters. Compared to just 10 female lesbian and bisexual characters.

Thankfully, we have seen the #buryyourgays trend slowly come to a steady halt in the last couple of years. But there has to be a replacement hashtag right? Correct! Introducing #cancelyourgays….

In some ways this new trend is worse! I mean, it certainly boils my blood more. It has a whole new feeling of injustice about it and there is an even clearer line between the treatment of male gay shows compared to sapphic shows. Obviously straight shows are still miles ahead, I don’t expect to catch them up, but a little bit of mileage would be nice!

So now that we are in the times of streaming media, the sector saw a whole new opportunity to start cancelling shows and breaking hearts. I was a loyal Netflix fan but to say I am cross with them now, is an understatement.

Let’s start with Netflix, as I do feel they are the worst. I’m not going to list every sapphic show they have ever cancelled, it would simply take me too long. But let’s talk about the main tradegies

First kill - oh my heart. What was not to love about this show? It’s probably the hardest hit for me. Vampires, gouls, monster killers, themes of Romeo and Juliet throughout, Sarah Catherine Hook, and a lesbian couple as the leads where ‘coming out’ is not the storyline and their sexuality just happily exists in the background. It had everything in place for a huge following right? Yes! But Netflix has treated us to cancelling the show just two months after series one premiered! Netflix said it was due to a low completion rate. I haven’t seen the figures so I can’t say this isn’t accurate, but considering First Kill stormed into the top 10 within hours of it’s premiere and reached number 3 worldwide, only falling behind the huge peaky blinders and stranger things, you’d think that the figures couldn’t have been the problem. Considering the teenage hit Heart-stopper was renewed for a further two seasons despite having half the views of First Kill! Good job Heart-stopper chose to have Charlie and Nick as it’s lead and not Tara and Darcy, or it could have been a different story. Let’s not forget that First Kill’s show runner has also spoken about the lack of advertising Netflix gave to First Kill, almost like they didn’t want it to blow up.

Warrior nun - another hugely popular show. This one managed to get renewed for a season two but was cancelled shortly after the second season premiered. Netflix said it was due to viewing figures and production costs, but then again it always is…

The society - was cancelled after the first season, this time due to Covid. I mean, there is legitimacy to this as the second season was due to start filming in late 2020 but if you look deeper, Netflix absolutely did not cancel all of their series due in 2020. In fact, what was the other show to take the hit at the same time as The Society? It was I’m Not Okay With This, which is next on the list.

I’m not okay with this - what a great premise for a show! A mix of coming to terms with sexuality and the development of super powers! This show was a HUGE hit and fans thought the renewal for a season two was as secure as it could possibly be. But no. Due to ‘Covid’ Netflix cancelled it after season one. Definitely couldn’t blame views for this one’s cancellation. I Am Not Okay With This ranks at the 89.6th percentile in the Drama genre. This means I Am Not Okay With This has higher demand than 89.6% of all Drama titles in the United States. It almost doesn’t make sense? Hmm.

A Typical - I personally thought this one was absolutely safe. The sapphic storyline was by no means the main plot of the show. It focused on the life of an autistic teenager dealing with school, friends and girlfriends. But his sister had her own sapphic storyline going on in the background and the wlw community were utterly invested! In fairness to Netflix, this one got four seasons which is unheard of and is believed to have been cancelled after season four due to it coming to a natural end.

Teenage bounty hunters - cancelled after season one. Frustrating so many fans, mainly due to the fact that it ended on a huge cliffhanger! Covid was blamed here too but fans bit back with evidence that advertising was lacking it and the show got lost in the weight of all the other Netflix shows. I mean, the executive producer was Jenji Kohan who brought us Orange Is The New Black, so you’d have thought that Netflix would have been pumping it to everyone’s home screens!

Glow - 15 Emmy nominations and three wins weren’t enough to save season four of GlOW from cancellation. In fact, it was renewed for a fourth season and Netflix reversed the decision due to, you guessed it, Covid! Producers claimed that it was too tricky to film the close proximity scenes. Yet somehow they did manage to do this in every other covid time show that continued…

Gypsy - one of the quickest Netflix cancellations ever. The show had only just premiered when the plug was pulled for a season two. Most of the blame went to viewing figures. Fun fact- the dedicated fans were still battling and protesting for a season two well over a year after it’s cancellation.

Dare me - season one flew into the top 10 in 30 countries. Enough to secure a second season? Of course not. There were rumours that other streaming services were interested in picking it up for a season two, but this never happened.

Netflix are serial offenders, there is no doubting this. But it’s not just them. I can’t go as in depth with these, as I don’t want to write a whole essay, so i’m going to pick the one stand out example of each. Let’s move on to Amazon Prime and another of my heartbreaks…

The Wilds - I loved everything about this show. The diversity, the powerful female leads, the complete mix of Lost and Pretty Little Liars, there was so much to love! Gender was actually the main theme of the show but the wlw storyline between Toni and Shelby was a huge fan favourite. The Wilds returned for a season two and ended on another big cliffhanger, this and the fact that the fan base was HUGE caused fans to feel secure about a season three. But shortly after season two ended, Amazon cancelled the show. They blamed a lack of views in season two however, The Wilds ranks at the 92.7th percentile in the Drama genre. This means The Wilds has higher demand than 92.7% of all Drama titles in the United States. The reaction on the internet was crazy. After all this time, the fans continue to petition and argue for a season three.

HBO next..

Gentleman Jack - this one was a huge shocker. The period drama got two seasons and was beloved to it’s fans, gaining a hugely impressive 92% critics score and 93% audience score on Rotten Tomatoes. I believe that neither HBO or BBC confirmed the reason for the cancellation but it is rumoured that it had to do with the length of time between the two seasons due to the pandemic, which could have led to a loss of viewers. Somehow, I doubt this.

Let’s not forget others worth mentioning..

Batwoman

Legacies

Legends of tomorrow

Charmed

A league of their own

Generation

Willow

and many many more…

Are the streaming services even aware of this pattern? Who knows. But the theme is there, in black and white. And as a sapphic female who has thankfully come out the other side of the years of self hatred, blame, isolation, and rejection, I am pleading with the streaming services to take note of this message

Dear streaming services and broadcast channels; sapphic representation is important too. Not just important but refreshing, a saving grace, a brief moment of normality, a resource, a source of education, and most important could literally save someone’s life.



[justinewt]

Meet Emily Holt - AS DUSK FALLS REWRITE OC

[AS DUSK FALLS - MASTERLIST]

Do not use my character without my consent thanks <3

warning: any arts and pictures you’ll see are not mine (I found them on pinterest) and I chose instagram model (insert actor)celeb used) to portray my oc, Emily is a character 100% created by me, Justine but the style of the bio has been inspired by (insert fic universe) wiki and bios made by director Guillermo Del Toro <3

words: 2k

EMILY CHARLOTTE HOLT bio by me

INFORMATIONS

DATE OF BIRTH: around late April 1980

AGE: In May 1998, Emily is freshly 18. She’s about about a month younger than Jay.

(Tyler is 25, so born sometime in September 1973; Dale is 21, born in mid-April 1977 – Dale and Emily are exactly 3 years and 1 week apart – and Jay is 18, born in around March 1980.)

ZODIAC SIGN/MBTI TYPE: Taurus/ISFJ

(headcanons for her family members: I feel like Tyler is ESTJ, so probably a virgo, Dale is ESTP/Aries and Jay INFP/Pisces)

SEX: Female 

NATIONALITY: American

ORIGINS: British (mainly)

OCCUPATION: High school Student at Bridgeley High (1994-1998, she graduated just a month before it all went down)

SKILLS: Horse riding and she was very handy, given she always wanted to work in the barn with her brothers

HOBBY: Horse riding, listening to music and hanging out with her brothers

CHARGES (if she was arrested/went to prison): Conspiracy (12 months of imprisonment); Complicit to burglary (class 3 felony) and guilty of 3rd degree burglary (3 years and 6 months of imprisonment); Complicit to hostage taking with no criminal intent, charged as Class 1 misdemeanour (6 months of imprisonment)

POSSIBLE TIME IN PRISON: minimum 5 years (if arrested, Tyler gets the death penalty if arrested, spends 14 years on death row before being executed in 2012, and if caught, Jay gets the same sentence but his death sentence is commuted to a life sentence without parole)

FAMILY

PARENTS: She’s the only daughter and youngest biological child of Sharon and Bear Holt

SIBLINGS: She has two older brothers, Tyler and Dale, and Jay, though they’re technically cousin.

RELATIVES: Brooke, her mother’s younger sister, Deceased. And unnamed paternal family members; mention of her deceased grandfather.

FRIENDS: Her best friend was the unnamed younger sister of Jessica (Dale’s crush)

EARLY LIFE: Emily was born in late April 1980, exactly 3 years and 1 week after Dale, and exactly one month after Jay, on the same day. So, when he was born and his mother, Sharon’s sister and Emily’s aunt died, and Sharon adopted him, she passed him as her daughter’s fraternal twin and raised her two oldest to consider him their sibling. While Dale and Tyler, their older brothers, grew up treating him as such, they both knew the truth, though Tyler, being older, was more aware of it. Emily was kept in the dark by her mother and learned about it way later.

Their brothers, Tyler and Dale, were respectively 7 and 3 years older than the “twins”. Both helped raising and caring for them, but essentially Tyler as most of the responsibility to care and protect his siblings fell on him as he was the eldest. Dale was very playful, and much more careless and tempestuous so Tyler also had to deal with him, on top of everything else, and was somewhat of a bully towards Jay, at some point using a BB gun on him. He teased him way more than he did Emily because when he did, Tyler would kick his ass (metaphorically speaking, or not), so he contented himself with making jokes. Sometime after Emily was born, Sharon let an almost 8-year-old Tyler hold his baby sister and it seemed to form some kind of bond already as he never forgot how she looked at him with her big eyes and smiled. He grew up to be very protective of his family but even more so of his sister, being on the contrary, quite distant and unaffectionate towards Jay, though he did care for him as well. But throughout their lives, he seemed to subtly, or not, make Jay understand that he cared more about Emily, as if he wasn't as much family.

Until she entered high school, Emily’s favourite brother was beyond the shadow of doubt, Tyler. He raised her and Jay since they were babies and kept Dale from teasing her, teaching her valuable skills, making her grow up to be someone very handy and skilful. She never realized that he felt some resentment and jealousy towards them still, but mostly towards Jay as he knew he wasn’t his biological brother and more or less subconsciously held it against him. He knew everything about his younger siblings, how they kept a squirrel as a pet when they were young, and he knew before she told anyone that she started liking grunge music when she was 11 or 12. For her 12th birthday, he got her the Nevermind album from Nirvana and a CD player, which she ended up sharing with Jay. He didn’t get such gifts for either of his brothers. She already idolized Tyler since she was a child, but he had officially become her favourite brother. At the time, and because she was too young to work, and they weren’t exactly rich, she wanted to find a way to get some money to get herself a pair of Converse, to do like Kurt Cobain so Tyler got her to help him fix things around the house and do chores and a month later, he came home with a box and gave her a pair of black converse, which she started wearing 24/7 at school.

She had a rocky relationship with her father and was quite scared of him for a while, mainly because he could get violent when drunk and hit their mother sometimes and would hit Tyler and Dale too when they got in the middle. But when she was younger, maybe 8 or so, he one day brought home some rabbit he had caught and she wouldn’t listen to him and sit down because she wanted to go play outside with Jay but also because she didn’t want to skin the animal, so he smacked her across the face, bringing her to tears and she ran off. She hid in the barn, in a corner, curled up and quietly crying, until Tyler, then 15-year-old, found her. He had a bruise on his cheek, and she cried even more and asked if he got hit because of her. He dismissed her worries and got her to come out and help him somewhere else on the property. At dinner, her father awkwardly apologised, coming up with excuses and empty words, talking a lot but basically saying nothing, and she just nodded, not really saying anything. She already didn’t trust her father, or feel safe around him, but she certainly wouldn’t after that. After that event, Dale would always crack jokes and used the fact that he was always teasing Jay to make her laugh. He very lightly teased her too but with Tyler watching her, he never went as far as he did with Jay. She was definitely Tyler’s favourite too. The first memory he had with her was her smiling at him as a baby, so he hated seeing her cry. He was as protective of his mother as he was of his sister. 

When she and Jay entered High school, they quickly found out how well-known their family actually was in that school, because all four Holt kids went there and the parents too back in the day. During their first year, Tyler was already 21 and very much working and Dale was already out of school, having dropped out about a year prior, and he would come pick them up everyday when Tyler couldn’t. Jay and Emily were in the same classes, so they were always together but as the freshman year went on, she made friends with other people in some of the classes they didn’t share, though always trying to include Jay in the group, but he went back to staying alone. By the end of the first semester, she had ditched her new friends and preferred to hang out with her brother, though she had kept one good friend, another girl from the group she hung out with and one boy that she liked. The two siblings began being isolated by their classmates. They would often call Jay a “weirdo” or “loser” and she would defend him. She acted exactly like Tyler did with their mom. She almost got into a fight with a couple of other kids at the school and after telling Tyler, he basically scolded her - more out of worry for her than actual anger - and told her not to get into any fights and not act like Dale, which for some reason made her want not to listen to him.

She began to act as Jay’s protector at school and it emboldened her, she was more rebellious, and it reflected in her relationship with her dad. She started to test his limits, which was probably not the best idea as he would get mad and try to hit her, but she often managed to dodge and run away, Tyler and Dale getting hit in her place, which she felt bad for. She began to think Tyler hated her because she realized he was more distant. In the beginning of the second half og her freshman year of high school, she met again a boy who was in the friend group she had temporarily joined in her first year, but he had developed a crush for her. She reciprocated his feelings and they shared a kiss. He asked her out and one week-end, Emily lied, saying she was going for a girl's pajama party as her best friend's house when really, she was going to the arcade with her boyfriend. The next morning, Sharon told Tyler to go get his sister and when he got to Emily's friend house and she wasn't there, he asked to use the landline to call his mom and told him. Sharon told him to drive around town and come home. He came home half an hour later and she was already there, getting scolded in the kitchen because she didn't want to tell them where she was the night before. At some point, she stood up because she wanted to leave, and accidentally yelled back at her mom and her dad got angrier. He swung his arm in her direction and upon dodging him, she fell against the fridge, curled up, her arms up in front of her face, eyes widened and her whole body shaking like a leaf.

Tyler and Dale got inbetween her and their dad and got hit in her place. Later, she told Tyler where and who she was with the night prior and told him she was with a guy from school. He told her not to lie and she admitted that he was her boyfriend. Dale heard and got worked up knowing a boy "touched her" and she yelled that nobody touched her and it took Tyler shoving him to make him shut up. One day at school, Dale came to pick up his siblings and he saw Emily come out of school with a boy. When she crossed his gaze and saw him, she put a distance between her and the boy but he now knew who her boyfriend was. He walked up to them and beat him up bloody. He was arrested and because he wasn't yet 18, he was sent to juvenile detention. She wouldn't talk to Dale for months after that, and didn't speak to him during the three months he spent in juvie. The boy was transferred to another school and wouldn't talk to her anymore, telling her her brother was a "fucking psycho". By the end of their second year of high school, as they turned 16, Jay dropped out and she really was alone now. She had her best friend left and that was about it for the next two years of high school.

Then, in May 1998, the events of the game happened. She wasn’t supposed to be involved in their plans, but she refused to stay behind, and Tyler agreed to let her come along, on the condition she did exactly as he said.

[AS DUSK FALLS - MASTERLIST]

Published (09/25/2024) by Andrea

[soul-wanderer]

Genuine question, I wasn't into fandom when I watched CM, and my mind is always blank with TV shows, so I rarely pin over one ship or another. I never understood why people say CM is queerbaiting. Can you please explain why? Because I'm genuinely curious, and if I'm being honest, now looking back, Emily is so shippable with anyone on the team. Maybe it's because of my view of 'not breaking a marriage, especially with kids in it', that make me never understood Jemily. I'm big on the Temily team, though.

Hey there,

I will try to keep the reply somewhat linear, but it's been so long that it's honestly going to be hard to remember everything that went down since, well, basically 2005 or so.

First off, I will acknowledge that queerbaiting looked a little/lot different on Criminal Minds than it did on other shows.

Behind the scenes, it's been both rumoured and openly talked about that the writers did consider making Emily's character queer, and I have read rumours that the same plans had been made for Reid's character as well. But, as is/was, none of that ever happened.

It's all a bit hazy now, but I vaguely remember the random queerbaiting tweets that originally showed up when the main show was still running, but I eventually tuned out of what they were posting on social media, because that kind of stuff quickly gets tiring. But I am certain they did make comments/remarks on certain pairings, only to never follow up on those, either.

But most importantly: The way some of these relationships/friendships were written, mainly the one between JJ and Emily and, to some extent, also the one between Morgan and Reid.

At some point, it felt like they weren't even trying to hide the fact that JJ was closer to Emily than she was with her own husband. If they had "just" been friends, maybe they wouldn't have stayed in such close personal contact while Emily was gone. This went way beyond JJ's duty to be there for Emily in regard to her safety. The same applies to Emily being the one to rescue JJ/the one JJ calls for help when shit goes down.

To help with the bigger picture here: In earlier seasons we do see JJ, Emily AND Garcia as a friendship group. And they maintain that, somewhat, throughout the seasons, but their friendship with Garcia is different, and it is quite obviously what we would consider a friendship.

And I will say the same about JJ and Reid. These two have known each other much longer, so it would be easy to assume that they are much closer friends. I will ignore the fact that after like fifteen years they decided that JJ randomly has feelings for Reid, because it's bullshit (in canon, anyway). They are friends, they are coded as friends and always have been. And they very clearly show what friendships are written like on the show - and it's not what JJ's and Emily's relationship looks like, at all.

They know each other in ways that are so very different from the other dynamics within the team, and most definitely different from what JJ and Will have. At some points it just became almost grotesque how close JJ and Emily were, without them being a couple, especially since Emily has a fantastic track record when it comes to tried and failed romantic relationships.

But I think most importantly, it's in the way they bent over backwards to avoid any and all queer relationships on the show. We have Hotch and Haley, Reid and Maeve and Maxine, Morgan and Savannah, Garcia and her two nerdy boyfriends, Blake and her husband, Emily and that British dude and I think there was someone else as well? And of course JJ and Will. The argument that this show isn't about their personal relationships simply does not work, when time and time again there has been such a heavy emphasis on their private lives, and much more importantly, on their very much heterosexual relationships. It's almost laughable now, how absolutely fucking straight everyone on that show was. I mean, what are the odds? What are the odds?

And another honourable mention: I remember at some point the pressure got so big, that apparently the writers/producers couldn't entirely ignore it any longer, and all we got was that iconic scene of JJ and Emily at a pride? event, like full blown rainbow flags and that big fucking ass speech about tolerance/acceptance? I don't care to remember, because nothing ever came of it, other than some laughable virtue signalling.

And let's just not mention how being gay only ever existed in relation to crimes being committed, so there is that.

So yeah, maybe it wasn't outright queerbaiting in the traditional way, but in many ways it still was, and at the very least they made it VERY clear that non-heterosexual relationships would not happen as long as they were in charge

[holly-mckenzie]

Hello! I love LOVE your blog it's so good. I always find the most interesting shows because of your posts so i wanted to ask what are your fav ships with the best chemistry in a newer film/tv show? I saw a whole debate a few days ago about how "ships nowadays are always lacking chemistry " and i was interested in your opinion. Have a nice day!

Hello anon... I need to clarify, I wrote this answer essay thinking about romcoms, bc that's what film twitter has been talking about, but I realised you said "ships". I will answer your question here. Under the cut, is my thoughts on romcoms, please be aware what is hiding beneath the cut is a behemoth of an answer.

But in terms of "ships" and lacking chemistry. I think there's a few things to think about. Specifically, I believe there has been way to much focus on "ships" and sometimes this conversation detracts from other elements of storytelling, or completely takes over the entire story and what it makes it interesting (e.g. - the conversation surrounding Anatomy of a Fall or what Reylo did to Star Wars). On the subject of Star Wars, one of the things to think about in this conversation is how racism, misogyny, or general bigotry shape peoples opinions. The argument of "they don't have chemistry" is a common phrase used by racists and bigots who don't want to engage with their faves being involved with characters of colour/woman etc.

Now unto other reasons why "ships" might not have chemistry. I think if you are discussing American Television, one thing to note is the departure of shows that had 20+ episodes. With the fear that the show might get cancelled and with a shorter time to establish the narrative, I think we, as audiences, are seeing less of the long con, "will they, won't they" game, that we saw in the late 90's/2000's. I would argue this could be one of the reasons that British TV does so well, most British series are only 6 episodes long, and there may be a better understanding of how to write a more compact narrative, and perhaps there's even better job security... But maybe not considering Joe Barton's history.

Lastly, there is a world of media out there and you need to make the effort to find and engage with it. I talk more about this under the cut, but so many people who are minorities are not given the same advantages as white straight people... So if you want to find good stuff. You gots to look for it. It might not be in a language you understand, or about people who you can relate to, but its out there. Go find it.

So in Answer to your Question, what are my fav ships with the best chemistry in a newer film/tv show.

Television: Starstruck (2021– ) : Tom x Jessie The Lazarus Project (2022– ) : Janet x Rebrov & Zhao x Archie & Shiv x George The Artful Dodger (2023) : Belle x Jack Foundation (2021– ) : Hober Mallow x Brother Constant Alex Rider (2020– ) : Alex x Kyra Animal Control (2023– ) : Shred x Emily Tom Jones (2023) : Tom x Sophia

Other Honourable Mentions: Summer Love (2022– ), Colin from Accounts (2022), Still Up (2023– ), Little Woman (2022), Lockwood and Co. (2023), The Flatshare (2022), The Other Two, Suzhal (2022), In Limbo (2023– ), The Buccaneers (2023– ).

Films: Femme (2023), Here (2023), Decision to Leave (2022), Stay the Night (2022), The Big Four (2022), Ponniyan Selvan i & ii, Stellar (2022), Wildhood (2022), Lakelands (2023), Wedding Season (2022), 7 Days (2021), Scream VI, Sanctuary (2022)

Books: Anything by Tia Williams, Sarah Beth Durst, Uzma Jalaluddin, Jane Igharo

Stage: The Effect (2023/2024), Much Ado About Nothing (2019), Much Ado About Nothing (2022), The Notebook (2024), Hadestown

My Original Answer:

Hello anon, thank you so much! Thanks for appreciating my questionable taste. I do really enjoy watching TV, film, and books and then writing academic papers about them in my head. So obviously this question is really fun.

I need to start by saying, I have been thinking about chemistry for weeks, so I am going to answer your question, just maybe not the question you were asking. Brace yourselves, I wrote an essay.

The whole debate is deeply fascinating to me for various reasons. In part I do really believe that people need to broaden their horizons when it comes to the art they interact with. There is a world of cinema out there. If you surround yourselves by clowns and then complain you are in a circus... that's a choice, no?

Expand your horizons, dip into Asian cinema, African cinema, American Cinema (North, South, and Central), that European stuff (that isn't just what the BBC is pumping out or starring your French favs). And if you must watch Hollywood, then watch some indie stuff. Watch some gay stuff. Watch some stuff by people of colour.

Lichrelly no one is forcing you to watch the blandest/whitest romcoms/romdrams. Are they more accessible to watch? Sure. But complaining, when you don't even care to do the research is a choice. Especially, bc of the way that racism/misogyny/homophobia/ableism makes it harder for people to get their stories out. If you really care about these things. You gots to put the effort into caring and finding them.

Secondly, boiling down chemistry to romance is absolutely wild, considering there are different type of chemistry needed for different roles. For example Rob Collins and Shantae Barnes-Cowan have mad chemistry in the show Firebite. Now let me clarify, I am not saying its romantic. They pulled off the single dad and adopted daughter in a survival/action story story so well. Pedro Pascal, who? And it takes chemistry to pull that off. More popularly, one of the reasons that Succession works as a show is because the actors have chemistry. Some of which is romantic ofc, but the vast majority of it isn't (no matter what the in*est shippers on A*3 say). But I understand, the people want what they want, and that's romance.

I also think that chemistry is an odd thing. I know people are inclined to think that its an objective. You look at two people and are like, "Wow, they have chemistry!", and everyone agrees, because "Wow, they have chemistry!". But I am inclined to think its not that straight forward. There is something to be said about our interactions with art being subjective and biased. This is because as we interact with art, we are interacting with it through our own lens. The author is truly dead, and all that matters is the individual reader's interpretation. So, for example, many people love the movie Anyone But You. If you go on YouTube there are many people who have made ship videos about Bea and Ben. But there is a category of people who fucking hate it and think that its trash and the leads don't have chemistry (Yes, I am talking about myself in third person. I will avenge you Much Ado About Nothing).

So, who is right? Who is wrong? Honestly, it really doesn't matter, because its a fucking movie, and like I said, the author is dead. Similarly, some critics really didn't like the series Tom Jones. In certain reviews and articles, criticism of the series was that Solly McLead and Sophie Wilde don't have chemistry. However, if you follow me, you know I completely disagree and made that show my personality for a couple of months.

But on the subject of chemistry (of the romantic variety), I definitely think its more complicated then people let on. I think most people believe that it's about the actors. You put them in a movie, show, whatever, and chemistry they have just happens. It's like love, you can't explain it, but its there. Or, according to my friend, who used to work in the film industry, the best chemistry comes across when the actors hate each other or they secretly like each other/are fucking each other. It's brought on by strong emotions. Which is obviously a school of thought.

However, as my bestie Merry (@akajustmerry) has been discussing, there are actors who are dating/fucking IRL and none of that comes across in the film/show. I highly recommend checking out Merry's blog to see their opinions on this bc Merry is THE film critic of our generation! Someone please hire them!

But I do think it takes more than just what the actors can bring. It's about the direction they are being given, its about the script, its about the staging. It's about the framing. And it's about the actors and their acting ability. Actors are working professionals and contrary to popular belief, it takes skills to act (not just a pretty face). And one of the skills needed is the ability to create trust between the leads, as Merry and an anon discusses in this post. Because without trust, how can there be chemistry. Which is why intimacy coordinators are SO important. Fuck anyone who says otherwise!

To argue against my friend who used to work in the industry, yes hating/loving someone IRL can create tangible chemistry. And yeah, it might be hard to overcome friendship, if you are friends with your co-star (e.g. - that one interview where Jessica Matten jokes about how weird it was to kiss Kiowa Gordan in Dark Winds). But think about Nikesh Patel and Rose Matafeo in Starstruck. From what I can tell, which is little bc I don't know them IRL and its none of my business, Rose and Nikesh weren't hating each other or fucking in each other. They seem to be friends, but mostly co-workers. But regardless of all of that, Starstruck is literally one of the greatest romcoms of our era. And they have mad chemistry.

Additionally, in my opinion, Lee Pace and Laura Birn of Foundation fame, and Lana Gordon and MPQ/Zachary James and Gloria Onitiri of Hadestown fame have chemistry. But all the men I just listed are gay/in relationship with men, so we can't chalk up chemistry to already existing romantic tension. It is an aspect of acting and skill. Both Zachary James and MPQ have spoken about how the trust they have in their co-stars, have allowed space to shape and cultivate the characters they play (including the romance of the show).

You can't just cast two conventionally attractive people and expect their attractiveness to do the rest. You know my thoughts on Anyone But You. But similarly, think about the way that people were thirsting over Zoë Kravitz and Robert Pattinson bc of all the press and photo shoots they did for The Batman. But then also think of the accusations of whorebaiting, that followed. They simply, in my opinion, did not have chemistry. Even if the Bat and the Cat are one of the funnest dynamics in them comics.

So now that we have discussed actors, and audiences. We gots to discuss actual story telling. Writing is a skill. I know on the tumblr dot com, we have discussed that writing good sex scenes is a skill. Writing good romance is the same... I don't want to labour on about this, bc I feel like you must already know that. But some things to consider is the way in which the focus on tropes instead of storytelling is a detriment to the genre. The fanfictionization of romance. The way in which abuse is touted as romance. The way that studios (coughcough Netflix) are churning out these stories (some of which are def US military propaganda). The lean towards making these movies, more and more explicit. The way that some studios/book publishers are trying to profit off already successful stories without realising what made it successful (e.g. - the amount of fake dating stories in the wake of To All the Boys, or the remakes of older movies).

So what made the movies of old so special. What made romcoms from the late 90's early 2000's, the movies by Nora Ephron and Garry Marshall oh so special. The bleak answer is nostalgia. But you could also discuss the type of narratives that were told during the time. The type of backgrounds these actors and storytellers had before they took these roles. The socio-political enviroment that cultivated these stories. The amount of money and time the studios were willing to invest in these movies. The lack of AI technology... All of the cheating scandals that arose on the sets. The existence of the Film Stars™ vs. just actors.

The fact that streaming has changed the way that movies/tv are made, and the way people consume them. Which could potentially lesson the impact on audiences, as there is less need to go to theatres. To wait for the movies to be released on DVD/VCD/VHS. Lessen the need to re-watch the movies obsessively, bc it was one of three movies you owned on DVD/VCD/VHS, and thus a lack of cementing it in your brain as THE RomCom. Yes, this is just an excuse to yell: BRING BACK PHYSICAL MEDIA, YOU COWARDS!

But one thing that I haven't seen discussed as much is the existence of the Hays Code.

A couple years ago, I watched this lecture and read this book by this academic that focused on RomComs. (I forgot the academic, but I can find it later, if you want. Can you tell I studied English and Film in school?). Regardless, the academic argued that during the 90's filmmakers had to grapple with the remnants of the Hays Code. The code was a "self-imposed industry set of guidelines for all the motion pictures that were released between 1934 and 1968." The Code prohibited things like "profanity, suggestive nudity, graphic or realistic violence, sexual persuasions and rape."

So, while RomComs, like Pretty Woman, were in production, more then 20 years after the Hays Code, this academic argued that filmmakers were grappling with what this freedom meant. That while Pretty Woman was definitely a movie that could have never been made during the time of the Code, the affect of the Code meant that these narratives were adhering to the Code, whether intentional or not.

I think one of the things to consider about the Code was the way that filmmakers had to figure out ways to work around the restrictions in order to tell the stories they wanted. So, for example the Noir is a genre came about during the height of the Code and a time where film-makers didn't have access to that much money. So, the filmmakers had to be creative to get the shots they wanted, which is how we got the highly stylized way of filming that is so iconic to the genre. Not out of excess but out of need. Additionally, the iconic archetypes of the Noir Detective and the Femme Fatale are directly due to the Hayes Code and the period that villanized certain types of woman, and esteemed certain types of men.

Yet, there is an entire study on the homosexual subtext, which was written into these films. For example in The Maltese Falcon, the main character, Sam Spade, refers to another character as a "gunsel". The the censors wrongly assumed this was a reference to a gunman, however, it is vulgar way to refer to someone who is gay. This is the same movie that features a different character, Joel Cairo, who is suggested to be gay (which is one of the reasons the film could not be legally shown on US television stations). Being a filmmaker meant learning how to navigate around the code. Being a filmmaker meant taking a risk, bc you may end up on wrong side of it.

If you want more information on queer films of the time, I believe that Merry or Deah would be able to help you seeing they have an entire podcast on gay movies/shows/games. Check out the @gayvclubpodcast.

So, going back to the RomComs of the 90's. You are talking about an entire industry of filmmakers, who were making movies after the wake of an extreme censorship, and on some level they must known or have heard stories about navigating that terrain. They must have also, on some level, understood what it meant to cultivate stories where characters want each other, like each other, yearn for each other. Because during the Code you couldn't just point a camera at them and say "See they are fucking each other, they did fuck each other, they will continue to do so. Clearly this is a romance". More work needed to be done and laid out in order to cultivate the romances that we now love.

I would argue, if you want to buy this argument, that this is the same reason that K-Dramas/Movies are SO popular. Because it was not that long ago, that Korea was more strict about the way in which physical intimacy was filmed. Think about the era, where actors would stand next to each other, lips touching, and the camera would spin in a dizzying way around them. Now, obviously, kisses aren't filmed in that way, and some movies feature open mouth kisses. Scandalous, I know. But I would argue this is one of the reasons that K-Dramas are so famous, because of the knowledge on how to draw out emotions from the audience that does not rely on physical/sexual intimacy.

So, I suppose the conversation of "ships nowadays are always lacking chemistry " comes down to a skill issue. Skill on the filmmakers parts for not being able to cultivate good stories. Skill on the Actors part, for not being able to do what is required of the role. Skill of the studios parts, for not realising the long term impact of physical media and what sells. And skill on the audiences part, for not seeing the world in one way, and not caring to do the research to find the stories you are looking for.

[charlenasaxen]

Favorite Quotes - The Final Gambit pt. 1

Grayson hadn’t called once since he’d left for Harvard. Xander, my self-appointed BHFF—Best Hawthorne Friend Forever

how much do you need a distraction right now, and how attached are you to your eyebrows?”

“One,” I answered. “And ten.”

Xander gave a little bow. “Then I bid you adieu.” In a flash, he was gone.

Alisa began, and I tuned out.

“I’ve seen better.”

“Jameson!”

I found Jameson at the edge of the Black Wood. He was wearing a white tuxedo that fit his body far too well

Jameson Winchester Hawthorne. I ran like the ball gown wasn’t weighing me down, like I didn’t have a knife strapped to my thigh.

Jameson caught me, our bodies colliding. “Happy birthday, Heiress.”

In a million years, the life Tobias Hawthorne had left me would still take my breath away.

Slow dancing, barefoot, on the beach.

The ocean. A cliff. A wager. A race. A dare.

Years from now, I’d still be able to feel it. The weight of the ball gown, the wind in my face. Sun-warmed sand on my skin and chocolate-covered strawberries melting on my tongue.

By sundown, we were almost home. It had been the perfect day.

“Fortunately, Heiress, Hawthorne men have nine lives.”

“Ferris Wheel Leapfrog Death Match?” I repeated. That had Xander written all over it

or maybe I sensed it. Sensed him. Clad entirely in black, wearing a ten-thousand-dollar tuxedo

Grayson Hawthorne stepped onto the dance floor.

He came home.

Grayson Hawthorne let his eyes linger on mine for just a moment

“You aren’t on your own.” Grayson let his eyes linger on mine

a single person—who knew him even a tenth as well as his brothers and I did

“Don’t,” Grayson ordered roughly, “look at me like I’m broken.”

Hawthornes aren’t supposed to break, his voice whispered in my memory. Especially me.

“Emily?” Grayson Hawthorne was staring at a ghost.

he thought he was hallucinating. Again. Breaking down. Again.

Tell me again that I’m not broken.

“Hey. Look at me, Gray.”

Those light eyes opened.

because he thought I considered him weak

that Jameson was still in my bed. Eve didn’t seem to notice him on her way to my en suite, but Grayson did

but Grayson had loved her to the end.

“All those times playing Cookie Golf together, and you didn’t think this was worth mentioning?”

“In retrospect, good on you for not telling me. Excellent call, shows solid judgment.”

Xander made a face. “Note to self: Cancel the welcome festivities.”

I found Grayson standing statue-still outside the wing, dressed in a silver three-piece suit, his blond hair wet from the pool.

In one liquid motion, he dives into the pool, fully clothed.

“Where’s Jameson?” Grayson’s question drew me back

The list of complicated things that Xander Hawthorne considered to be “fairly simple” was lengthy.

picturing Hawthorne brothers swinging pillows at one another. Possibly shirtless.

“The old man didn’t make mistakes,” Grayson said in one of those tones that dared you to argue—and strongly advised against it.

and by the sacred rules of Chutes and Ladders

Technically, the Hawthorne brothers were half-siblings. Technically, Libby and I were.

“On a scale from boring to brooding,” Jameson quipped, “how’s he holding up?”

Heaven forbid Jameson Hawthorne get caught openly caring about his brother.

“I’m worried. Grayson isn’t okay, Jameson. I don’t think your brother has been okay for a very long time.”

What the hell? I looked up. “Jameson!” He was already on his way to me.

my eyes went to Grayson’s. “Three families.”

“One yours,” Grayson replied. “And one mine.”

“One of those pretty little Hawthorne grandsons?”

Xander raised his right hand. “I have a question about faces and dogs.”

“You’re not the boss of me? It’s something like that. No, wait, I remember! It’s You’re not the boss of me, wanker.”

“Excellent use of British slang,” Xander commented.

Jameson shrugged. “I’m a man of the world now.”

“Jamie’s right.” Grayson managed to say that without grimacing.

which left me in the middle row with Jameson on one side and Grayson on the other.

“Aren’t you supposed to be on a flight back to Harvard right about now?”

“Someone moved against our family. Of course I’m staying.”

Jameson reached around me to grab Grayson by his suit.

“Gray.” Grayson’s words came out louder, more desperate.

Jameson let go of him.

“I’ll be happy to discuss all of your personal shortcomings,” Jameson told Grayson. “Alphabetically and in great detail

The muscles in Grayson’s jaw tensed. “We’re not here to forgive you.”

“Always so serious,” she murmured, reaching out to touch his cheek. “And the shadows in those eyes…”

“Say that again,” Jameson encouraged, “but try to sound even more like an automaton this time.”

“I’m being horribly unfair to automatons.”

All she did was stare at him, softly crooning. Baby Gray was a real quiet little guy, solemn.

She was alive. She was a good daughter. But her mother could still look right at her and sobbingly say that all her babies died.

“That’s okay,” Xander responded cheerfully. “I have two feet!”

the message flashed across the scoring screen overhead. I ALWAYS WIN IN THE END

he took one look at the words on the screen and set them down. “A bold choice of name,” he said. He gave me a hopeful look. “Yours?”

the boys were still together, and things were getting ugly. Hawthorne ugly,” he clarified. “No external threats.”

Hawthorne ugly was probably the best we could hope for.

“in my defense, I didn’t expect the zoo to send an actual tiger.

taking a dark chocolate banana to the chest

letting me see every line of the muscles underneath.

Jameson did not elaborate on the mud, the blood, or what exactly he and Grayson had gotten up to

“that you can’t wash all this mud off before I…”

“Before you what?” I murmured.

Jameson Winchester Hawthorne smiled. “Guess.”

the pool lit just enough that I could make out his form

“How long would you have stood here, watching them, if I hadn’t come?” Jameson asked, an odd tone in his voice

I pictured Grayson on his knees in front of me. “What is it you think you know?”

“Gray has always been so perfect,” Jameson said. “It’s inhuman how good he was at just about everything.

“You have to be.” There was an urgency to Jameson’s words, a need. “Because I’m terrible at hurting, Heiress.

The old man knew about Eve. That revelation hit me like splinters

which probably costs ten thousand dollars and undoubtedly should not be steamed?”

“Chess,” I repeated. “The move—it’s called the Queen’s Gambit

saw Grayson in the doorway, backlit

walked past Grayson. “Watch where you’re aiming those cheekbones, buddy.”

“Everything hurts.” Only Grayson Hawthorne could say that and still sound utterly bulletproof. “It hurts all the time, Avery, but I know the man I was raised to be.”

The metalwork was impossibly intricate. The effect was delicate, but dangerous. Beauty and power.

Then I did the same thing with the black pieces, glittering with black diamonds.

Hell, Gray even let loose sometimes because the games didn’t reward perfection. He and I used to team up

But Saturday mornings, those games—they were about showing us that we already were.”

Extraordinary

I turned my attention back to the boys. “You’re Hawthornes. Who knows how to crack a combination lock?”

The answer was all of them.

Jameson looked to Grayson.

Grayson’s face was like stone.

“And in keeping with my general superiority in our sibling relationship I am better than fine.”

Grayson’s expression hardened. “And runs down the clock while you clean it up.”

“There’s still glitter in Grayson’s bathroom,” Xander finished. I got the feeling that wasn’t a metaphor.

“I’m sorry,” I told Max.

“I know,” my best friend replied. “But don’t worry. I’ll choose a theme song for him.”

“The Bible,” I repeated, and suddenly, it clicked. “Luke.”

“My second-favorite Gospel,” Max noted. “I’ll always be a John girl at heart.”

“I will talk only to the heiress. The one Tobias Hawthorne chose.”

Jameson reached for the chess pieces, but Xander smacked his hand away

“is a bit like a game of Where’s Waldo, except Waldo likes to jab people with her cane.”

The stone arches, hand-carved pews, and elaborate stained-glass windows

“As opposed to what, girl? Springing forth fully formed from the head of Zeus?”

"not to Alice or their children or you boys.”

Grayson took to the pool, pushing himself past the point of human endurance again and again

“Can it be about off-label uses for medieval weaponry?” Xander requested. “Because I have some ideas.”

as if coming to a very serious decision, he lifted his hand and pressed one finger to the end of my nose. “Boop.”

“Triple boo—” Xander started to say, but I ducked

“Avery, people have hated me my whole life.”

“Not anyone who knows you,” I said fiercely.

Xander smiled, and something about it made me want to cry

“You didn’t love the great and terrible Tobias Hawthorne. You loved the old man.”

Grayson and his oughts and shoulds. Hawthornes aren’t supposed to break. His voice spoke deep in my memory. Especially me.

Grayson pushed off the wall, treading water as he measured his response. “Jamie doesn’t tell me everything.”

the muscles in his back so tense that it looked like his shoulder blades might split the skin

when my hand reached for the edge, another hand grabbed mine.

Jameson pulled me out of the water. “Don’t breathe,” he murmured.

“He knows better. That is a Hawthorne dog.”

we were in the Hawthorne theater. Not to be confused with the Hawthorne movie theater

“Gray has a voice so deep and smooth that you will shed literal tears...you will come to believe he spent the 1950s wearing the most dapper of suits

“My duet will have to wait!”

“Who were you going to duet with?” Libby asked.

“Myself!”

he seemed so sure that Jameson and I were the ones Grayson needed

the sound of achingly beautiful violin music began drifting into the hall

Grayson poised in front of open bay windows, wearing a suit without the jacket, his shirt unbuttoned, a violin pressed to his chin.

so high and sweet it was almost unbearable.

Jameson caught his brother’s forearm. “Don’t. Gray. You’re not hurting anyone but yourself.”

“You play beautifully,” I told Grayson, pushing back the urge to cry

The Hawthorne grandsons were also damn near lethal

we both know that you haven’t let yourself want anything in a very long time.”

Grayson’s head turned toward mine, the light reflecting off his blond hair in a near-halo. “For you, Avery.”

He reached a hand down to Jameson and pulled him to his feet, leaving the two of them standing just inches apart

Grayson’s fingers brushed mine as he took it

His gaze found its way slowly and inexorably to mine. “We need to go down to the wine cellar.”

[eepypigeon]

🐺 and ⚙️!

🐺 - Favorite character(s)? As many as you want to list

⚙️ - How did you discover the Taleblr community?

yeesss ok ok sO

favourite character forever and always will be Johnny Toast hes just so silly and goofy like that. He's a ghosthunter, he's bisexual, he has an addiction problem, he's british, Hes a cutie patootie, his mother was the queen of england, (rest in peace Toasts grandmother) THE BOYS NAME IS TOAST. what isnt there to love.

honourable mentions; Billie Acachalla, Cardboard Friend, Amie (soso strong emily from corpse bride vibes in my brain), Ghost (it felt mean not to include him), And Gertrude :> though i could have kept going for a while fr.

Now as far as how i discovered this community, my younger sibling actually introduces me to VT's videos way back when (probably in like 2015 or something). She's always good at recommending stuff i'd like- it's always a joke between us that she just hands me her hyperfixations cus she'll show me something and soon stop caring about the thing lmao

anyway i think i can actually remember the first video i watched, im pretty sure it was the FNAF SCHOOL ROLEPLAY! - Gmod Five Nights At Freddy's Animatronics Mod (Garry's Mod) - YouTube video (which is 8 years old now ooughjhh)- did i have any clue what the hell was happening? No not in the slightest! but i was FASCINATED.

So yeah, naturally i have a tumblr and look through the tags occasionally and mayhaps even indulge in some fanart time to time. the VT hyperfixation sits at the back of my brain ready to randomly resurface every 2 years like a sleeper agent. so thats cool.