#did i actually respond to anything you were saying mayhaps not
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|| Just a man-crush ||
[ John Doe / Joker x masc Reader ]
John is very jealous of you and Harley hanging out. He can't take it anymore.
Accidental confession + dissatisfying ending?
🌈 || John Doe / Joker [Batman: The Telltale Series] 🌈 || ~1k words 🌈 || masculine (& mlm) reader
Can be read as part 2 to this. Mayhaps gonna do a part 3.
Ever since you joined The Pact, John was ecstatic about a new face around.
You laughed at his jokes, even told some of your own, which got him interested in you.
Everything seemed perfect, at least in his mind, until he noticed Harley started taking a liking in you.
You didn't really like Harley though.
Still, you tried to at least be politely nice to her. She was running this place, so you didn't wanna get onto her bad side.
John partially knew that, but some other part of him was jealous.
He tried to explain to himself it was just his delusions and even tried to ask you about it - to which you responded honestly of course - but it still wasn't enough to convince him.
Whenever he saw you two, he had this indescribable feeling inside.
He was really torn, he valued you as his friend, but seeing you around Harley just broke his heart.
You were just so perfect- Of course Harley would prefer you over him.
He didn't want you to notice, but his behavior did change slightly as the feelings got the best of him.
He was more irritable at the mere mention of you going somewhere with her.
Even if you two were having a good time, the thought of you and Harley crept into his head and didn't wanna let go.
And one day he just snapped.
"Dammit, Y/N, stop lying to me!" He shouted while clenching his fists, catching you off guard.
"...Lying? John, I don't even like Harley that much." You tried to calm him down, but he seemed adamant in his opinion. "And you know that-"
"Well- Yes- Yes, I know! But- I just got this- feeling, I can't get rid of it!" He seemed desperate for any kind of solution in this situation. He really didn't wanna feel that way towards you.
You sighed calmly, still patient and ready to help your friend. "What are you feeling exactly, John?"
His breathing hitched slightly but he managed to compose himself.
You two were sitting in his room, and even though emotions got the best of him, he didn't want Harley to hear what's going on.
Which was especially hard with the place being practically out in the open, due to the big empty windows in his room.
"I know you don't like Harley, yes, you told me that- But for some reason, I have a voice in my head telling me... that something's wrong." He admitted after a while, looking at you like a lost puppy.
You stayed quiet for a moment, contemplating what to say.
"I mean- Look at you." He stared you up and down, making you feel a bit weird inside. "I know what Harley sees in you."
You took another moment, running out of options on how to convince your friend that you're really, really not interested in her.
"Uh... John." You decided to finally say something that would probably change his mind.
He looked at you intently, hoping you'd have some sort of definitive proof.
You didn't really have a reason to say anything like that before, so you held off from that, but it seemed now was the right time to confess.
"I'm- Generally not interested in women."
John blinked at you once, then twice. Processing the info.
He stayed silent for a brief second, making you wonder what was going through his mind in that moment.
But John was quick to tell you.
"Well..." His tone was different. Not negative, but... slightly confused. "That changes things... But actually- Not really."
You weren't afraid of him treating you differently after that confession, John seemed like the most accepting person ever. But you were a bit unsure of what John was getting at.
You tilted your head slightly, waiting for him to continue.
"I- I do feel different now." He admitted, not taking his sight away from you. "But there's still something there..."
"Uh... What is it, then?" You patiently asked.
He tried to pick his words carefully, still figuring out himself what he had on his mind.
"I'm not mad at you, that's for sure now." He figured that out.
"But..." He looked at the floor now in deep thought. "I'd be kinda mad if Harley were to talk to you?"
You weren't sure if the idea in your head was correct, but John seemed to be even more confused than you.
"...You're saying... You don't want Harley to hang around me."
"Yes, that's exactly what I said." He nodded, still unsure what you were getting at.
You felt a bit- flattered, even if it probably wasn't John's intention. But the possibility still haunted your thoughts.
"Uh... John, do you..." You started a bit awkwardly, nervous if you totally misread the situation. "Like me?"
"Of course I like you Y/N! We're like, best friends, right?" He grinned with an innocent expression on his face, which only made you even more nervous.
You awkwardly cleared your throat.
"Um, yeah- But- Do you like me... More than Harley?" You cautiously yet calmly asked.
That shut him up for a longer second, forcing him to really think about it.
"That's..." He once again put a thoughtful expression. "A possibility."
You weren't even sure if John was aware of how much of an effect he had on you, which only added to the feeling.
Did he like you? Or was it just his possessiveness over Harley?
"Well, we know you like me more than Harley, right?" He tried to light up the mood.
"Of- Of course." You responded, unsure to which direction he was getting at.
"Hm... It's true I've been thinking about you two a lot recently." He kept on with the subject. "But I've been convinced it's just been my jealousy over Harls."
You stayed quiet, letting him talk, although in your mind there's been a lot of thoughts now.
He then let out an ambiguous chuckle.
"Look at that, I've just been jealous over my best pal!" He finally concluded. "Well, glad we established that."
He then got up from his bed to give you an unexpected hug.
"Thanks for the help!"
You froze for a moment there, but you didn't want him to feel pushed away, so you gently patted his back.
"Um, you're welcome."
"Well, I think I gotta talk to Harley now. So- See ya!" And so, he stormed off, leaving you in his own room, confused.
...Was he aware he just confessed? He will always remain a mystery to you.
#batman the telltale series#telltale batman game#telltale john doe#telltale joker#telltale joker x reader#telltale john doe x reader#john doe x reader#joker x reader#masculine reader#masculine y/n#x reader#john doe#joker#masc reader#telltale#fanfic#fanfiction#mlm#imagine#masc y/n#accidental confession
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PSA: IS IT JUST ME OR DO CORDELIA AND LUCIE AS PARABATAI NOT MAKE ANY SENSE LIKE ITS SO RUSHED AND IM NOT SORRY BUT MY PSA ARE GETTING SO LONG EACH TIME I JUST HAVE SO MANY OPINIONS AND THOUGHTS TO SHARE OK????????
’ll never understand why Lucie and Cordelia become parabatai. how good friends are they really? we know Cordelia and Lucie hung out a few times (??????) and wrote letters to each other but how well do they know each other?
“But you could have told me. I could never have pitied you, Lucie I bought, bewildered. She didn’t mind that Cordelia had been in love with James- but the lying, the hiding….. she wished it didn’t bother her but it did.” -Lucie responding to Cordelia’s secret
(which is ironic of Lucie to think because this is the same bitch who hid herself working with grace from Cordelia to save Jesse lmao and deep down, she probably knew Cordelia wouldn’t of been okay with it)
Cordelia had gone a sickly color. “How could you not tell me that?”, she whispered. “You were going to go ahead with the ceremony, then, without warning me? What if something bad happened to you during it?- what if the ghosts meant harm?” - Cordelia responding to Lucies secret
“Did you know the difference when you chose to secretly befriend Grace behind my back, and never tell me about it at all?”-cordelias anger to Lucie about teaming up with grace to bring back Jesse from the dead
“I didn’t know how much my working with her would hurt you”, Lucie said. “I doubt James knew either. You never let on that you felt anything for him. You- you’re so proud, Cordelia.”- lucies rebuttal to Cordelia when she comes back from Paris
so I’ve posted four different arguments or statements from Lucie and Cordelia over the issues they’ve had. Cordelia didn’t tell Lucie she was in love with James. why the pity game? I DONT KNOW BUT I HATE THAT BLOODY WORD. honestly Lucie is right. Cordelia is way too proud, as is James. I’m sorry but I don’t get this whole “if I told you I love your brother, you would pity me.” but back in chain of gold, Cordelia likes the fact that they could be sisters in law and even thinks James may actually love her. so I don’t really understand this whole pity thing.
I think the reason Cordelia didn’t want anyone to know was that she then found out about Grace and thought people may in a way pity her since everyone assumed grace and James were in love.
moving on to Lucie seeing ghosts. I can see why Lucie didn’t share it because Cordelia made a whole fairy tale thing about how Lucie lives in fantasy world and they can’t be parabatai? I get why she didn’t say anything and by then, they were passed not giving a fuck about communicating. should she have said something? yes but it’s not like these two are bffs
there is no reason these two should be parabatai. they don’t communicate for starters. there’s too much drama and miscommunication. CC presents parabatai as being closer than brothers but not as close as lovers so wouldn’t you think that soon to be parabatai should be telling each other stuff?
like what bad would it have done if Lucie said “hey Cordelia, I know you don’t like grace but I’m using her help to bring a ghost back to life that I have cared for. please keep this between us. he means a lot to me.”
and why couldn’t Cordelia say “Lucie, I understand and I will keep it between us because I know you wouldn’t do anything to harm me on purpose. if you have feelings for this ghost, I support you. also I do not care for grace because I am in love with your brother and have been.”
mayhap Lucie could then say “oh James is such a buffoon! how could he not see what is in front of him? thank you for trusting me Cordelia”
y’all can critique my summary all you want 😭 (I tried ok?) but I don’t really see any harm in sharing the secrets they had? because maybe if they did or had some honest convos, and actually grew, I could see why they deserve to be parabatai. but I haven’t seen anything from their relationship that shows they should be. they don’t communicate, they keep every secret to themselves because god forbid someone pities or hates them, and they’re basically strangers towards the end.
Lucie even says in pov during the edom thing if she really knows Cordelia? and I think Cordelia thinks the same thing at another time. these two question if they know each other. parabatai don’t have to be perfect but they should have some sort of bond. and I don’t think they should be questioning if they know their friend at all. when it comes to the parabatai bond, CC is incompetent when forming it.
1. Alec does everything for jace while jace treats Alec like absolute shit. Alec can’t form his own thoughts or feelings without thinking about jace. -CC who thinks everyone loves jace
2. Will is nothing without Jem. like if you take Jem out of the equation, Will is an absolute monster but put jem into the equation, hmmmm maybe this dick can be tolerated for a second. Will is only tolerable because of Jem. but also never forgiving Will and Tessa for fucking right after they get notification Jem has died. -CC who thinks Tessa settling for Jem and waiting for him to die so then Tessa can have Will is the best of both worlds apparently
3. Emma and Julian- not even touching that. I’m so tired and over the unforbidden trope CC is obsessed with. it’s old
4. Matthew and James- James was prisoned by a bloody bracelet and Matthew kept the fairy potion a secret from everyone and ends up turning to alcohol. this is kinda harder to criticize because they are both being prisoned by their own thing. Matthew didn’t have to turn to the potion but belial would’ve found a way to torment James. so I don’t know if he could’ve got out of that. could’ve just told Tatiana no to cutting briars or told his parents on her lmao so as much as I want to like this bond, matthews feelings get pushed to the side and golden herondale steals the spotlight once again smh. James and his feelings take a front seat while Matthew is apologizing for feeling anything and his arc is nonexistent (JUST MY OPINION I DONT WANT NO SMOKE 💨)
in conclusion, these two should not have been parabatai. honestly most of these pairs shouldn’t be. they didn’t really have anything in common or anything that linked a strong powerful bond. I see Thomas and Christopher being more of a parabatai than any of these pairs. even Gabriel and Gideon. these siblings or family members actually speak to each other and work through their shit. Cordelia and Lucie “bonding” together didn’t work at all and felt super rushed. but that’s what happens when you waste hundreds of pages on miscommunication lmao
#anti cassandra clare#anti cc#just my stupid opinions#thomas lightwood#alec lightwood#anti jace herondale#gabriel lightwood#gideon lightwood#god I miss Gabriel and Gideon#why are Lucie and Cordelia parabatai#none of the pairs make any sense#like is it just me#anti will herondale#anti tessa gray#Jem deserved better#i don’t care#all these parabatai bonds suck#like one pair of the bond always takes center stage and the other one gets forgotten#I still hate Will#the fact that Thomas and Kit have the best bond in the series lmao
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·{†}· Statue ·{†}·
RRRSAAHHHH a little writing thing for two ocs that @paranoia-exe and I have made linked lores for! ALSO ALSO OOH OOH big big big credits to the amazing @emmettnet for original inspiration* for Zuriel (whumpee) and Kore (whumper)!!! he's genuinely one of my favorite whump creators oh my goodness- anywho enjoy :3. I didn't have a lot of ideas so this is sort of shit but y'know fuck it we ball + it's shit I know and it's a short piece of writing please have mercy also I haven't proofread any of this shit lmfao
CW:!!!!!! wing whump, implied captivity, non-human whumpee/whumper (angel-demon dynamic ig), uhh- implied dehumanization. uh oh silly time!
{†} · {†} · {†} · {†} · {†} · {†}
A pair of soft ivory wings, flawless golden hair cascading down to the statue's lower back from its head. soft, pale skin, face forever moulded into an expression of tranquility, eyes closed and chin held high with its golden adorned arms stretched out parallel to its wings that were being held in place by metal chains and rods. its body carrying a silky smooth cream robe, golden chains and expensive jewelry hanging from its ears and arms and even its wings and clothing. A translucent veil was draped across the statue's face, made out of a soft white fabric. the angel itself was a sight to behold, and it was oh so realistic in the eyes of anyone who viewed it; both visitors, and the statue's owner, Kore.
Zuriel was a perfect little decoration in the demon's abode, and it certainly played the part well. It would stay still for hours at a time, and had been taught by Kore never to react — whether it be flinching, or moving, or verbally responding — to anything or anyone when in that state. He couldn't say it wasn't good at following orders.
Even then, despite Zuriel's uncanny ability to stay still, Kore was still paranoid of someone finding out about a statue in his house actually being a sentient, living being. Sure, this was completely irrational — most of the time — considering Zuriel would never even move an inch and people rarely paid enough attention to notice the few moments of which it did twitch or move. Though, those moments of which the angel fucks up leads to discipline.
Perfection is all Zuriel knew. How to stand still with jewelry and heavy items of clothing weighing down its arms and wings, and it was so good at staying immaculately still that you couldn't even see it breathing most of the time. It was truly a divine being, but all it was good for now was to be a decoration. An item.
Mayhaps it will be worth more in the future. The chances are low at best, but it knew to expect the unexpected. It was how Zuriel got into this situation anyway.
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*Emmett was the creator of Angel On The Wall, an au of his ocs, which is what inspired both me and Wynter to create Zuriel and Kore!! :D
#whump#angel whump#whump writing#whump ocs#oc whump#whump oc#writing#oc writing#wing whump#implied captivity
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oh no omg babes i am the anon who asked about hockey i would never block you!!! firstly, i think its really cool (way cooler than me and my hockey habits, but if that's what i get for being only HALf canadian and not having as extensive of a hockey culture in the states :() that you keep up with the non nhl teams, i know usually its more personal and more fun to cheer for the more local teams, and also those dudes literally shred harder than the nhl sometimes! genuinely jealous of u there! also i literally don't have any legs to stand on in terms of nhl elitism (and also as a canadian, my entire canadian family is from alberta so 🙃). my teams are the sharks (literally foul) and the oilers. also you definitely are more plugged into hockey than i am babes i am very casual and random with my watching/supporting. for the lack of response, i just haven't been on tumblr as much this week (and i have adhd, which is mostly to blame) so i completely forgot i sent u an ask! also this ask has literally taken me several hours to draft so like, embarrassing on my end in terms of timeliness. you are valid and cool for cheering on the leafs (go leafs!!), but you are also much more than whatever sports team you like, i follow you because you are literally a wonderfully amazing person full of kindness and insane talent, and beyond the fact that i have literally nothing against the leafs. i am literally in love with u so i think the only thing that would make me block you is if you turned out to be a secret mass murderer or something (which seems highly unlikely so we are good there). i'm truly sorry if my lack of response made you feel uncomfortable or sad about sharing something about yourself, that was genuinely the exact opposite of the intended effect. because i enjoy reading both your stories and replies so much, and also value you as a person so much, i wanted to know more about you and other things you like! and i am really grateful and thankful that you did share about your hockey likes, and also grateful you continue to be so open with us. you have singlehandedly made me the most involved in a fandom community that i have ever been because you have created such a wonderful and welcoming atmosphere on your blog. so again sorry, and thank you for being so freaking cool. OMG i almost forgot about the hockey headcannon thing, as soon as i sent that last ask i was like why didn't i say anything about james and sirius they would absolutely gobble hockey right tf up. mayhaps it would be a bonding/truce between them and barty lol. ig the barty brainrot got to me too much (that fucking smut rattles around my skull so much you'd think i have rattlesnakes living in it. i refuse to believe you have never written smut before the remus fic. you're simply lying). anyways, sorry this is so long, but tldr is that i love you and you are amazing and you could never do anything wrong 🩷🩷🩷
omgomg omg ok I'm gonna respond to this in bullet points:
I was totally taking the piss im ngl; I didn't think you actually blocked me or assume that you were hating on me! I'm sorry hahaha I was making fun of myself really like "typical....cant even make friends properly because I have shit taste in hockey teams" 🤣
oof Alberta - thoughts and prayers my girl (gender neutral), Alberta is Canada's Florida
it's too bad about the oilers too because they have some really great players? but they suck just as hard Toronto, such a shame
"i follow you because you are literally a wonderfully amazing person full of kindness and insane talent, and beyond the fact that i have literally nothing against the leafs. i am literally in love with u so i think the only thing that would make me block you is if you turned out to be a secret mass murderer or something" ok so......what are we? 🥹🫣🤭😘 jk but you're literally so sweet; I'm sorry I made you feel like I was made/upset/offended or, worse, displeased with you cuz I'm soooooooo not and you don't owe me anything - least of all your time or effort in sending me messages 😭 -> also definitely not a mass murderer; far too lazy and don't like the mess, also, I'd likely break a nail - no thanks.
no apologies necessary at all babes, I'm a yapper and loved talking to everyone about it too and was just running my damn mouth
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo love you literally so much, thanks for being here and also for taking so much time to write to me; it's greatly appreciated <3
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Unsurprisingly I'm late again but thanks for the tag Art! Couldn't do the picrew one cause the website was being weird but I'll take a crack at the ask game 🤜
📷 What’s set as your phone’s lockscreen?
Currently its on the default but on my old phone it was something Marvel
🍫 Cheese or chocolate?
Depends on the mood, I honestly don't think I could live without either (if you put a gun to my head I guess I'd have to save cheese? but I would be very sad)
✨ Do you have any nicknames?
My actual name does, never been referred to by a nickname for this account (kinda curious to see what people would come up with)
🎵 Last song you listened to?
Pink Pony Girl by Chappell Roan
✏️ Have you ever written fanfiction?
Yep, though usually just short prompts (I'd like to make a full fanfic someday but the short form stuff is a lot easier for now)
😏 Are you on discord?
... not yet 👀
💛 Do you have any piercings?
Nah, never had the urge (might get a tattoo someday tho)
🐰 What do you think says the most about a person?
Oh god there's a million answers to this, but to pick one... their anger. Anger is an all-telling emotion to me, you can understand a person very well based on what they do in anger and what they get angry about (I gotta emphasize, anger is not a bad thing; its an emotion like any other, and if anything anger can be a good thing with the right energy put behind it. Its why it matters what makes a person angry, that says a lot)
🍪 If you were a cookie, what kind would you be?
The all chocolate ones, or ones with big chocolate chip chunks
🐶 Are you more of a dog person or a cat person?
Dog, but I do appreciate cats
🎧 Headphones or earbuds?
Earbuds, less stress on the cranial
🌼 What’s the last thing you said out loud?
Something about geography (I was talking about regional divides)
🙃 What’s a weird fact that you know?
Your nose is always in your field of vision, your brain just blocks it out (its fascinating that the brain can do something like that. Also have fun with the realization that you can now see your nose😊)
🦉 Are you a morning person or a night owl?
Night owl omg
🧸 Favorite place to nap?
Dunno if anyone feels this but other people's beds hit different (like if you're at a friends place and you're chilling in their bed, or even those display beds at mattress stores, idk the nap just hits easier)
🏳️🌈 Are you a member of the LGBTQIA+ community?
... mayhaps.
��� Describe yourself in three words.
Stressed. Passionate. Hungry.
👖 Jeans or sweatpants?
Sweatpants, jeans are the devil
🥤 What’s your go-to Starbucks order?
Fuck starbucks lmao, though for coffee shops in general I'd usually just get a snack to go
🧡 A color you can’t stand?
Chartreuse.
💎 What’s your most prized possession?
I guess my laptop?
☕ Coffee or tea?
Neither but if I had to for sure tea
🦖 Favorite extinct animal?
Velociraptors
🌙 How long have you been on tumblr?
My account is new, post-pandemic. But I as a person have been browsing the site years before that
🌴 Desert island item?
Machete
🐸 Describe your aesthetic
Grunge ig?
🔮 What’s your dream job?
Owning my own production studio and making whatever my brain dumps out
💙 Relationship status?
haha. no.
🌿 Describe your favorite outfit
I like those cargo-type pants with lots of pockets (the black ones but actual cargo print works too). And I guess a shirt that has something I like on it, like a map of the world or deadpool and spiderman making out
🎤 Is there a song you know all the lyrics to?
On the Floor by J-Lo
🤎 What color is your hair?
🤫
💌 Do you talk to yourself?
But of course~
💄 Do you wear makeup?
Nah
🌸 Best compliment you ever received?
Phew, uh. No clue lmao. I guess I appreciate when people notice my effort? Actually something that does feel like a compliment to me is when people respond strongly to my writing, like if I write something sad and see a comment that's all "omg I'm clawing at my walls op why", cause it means I did a good job!
💞 @ your favorite blog
@factorialsotherfandoms You're the first person I thought of so go for it (lemme know if you don't wanna be in these sorts of things). Too shy to @ more than that but anyone who sees this on my blog feel free to join in on my behalf
~ 💖 ASK GAME 💖 ~
📷 What’s set as your phone’s lockscreen?
🍫 Cheese or chocolate?
✨ Do you have any nicknames?
🎵 Last song you listened to?
✏️ Have you ever written fanfiction?
😏 Are you on discord?
💛 Do you have any piercings?
🐰 What do you think says the most about a person?
🍪 If you were a cookie, what kind would you be?
🐶 Are you more of a dog person or a cat person?
🎧 Headphones or earbuds?
🌼 What’s the last thing you said out loud?
🙃 What’s a weird fact that you know?
🦉 Are you a morning person or a night owl?
🧸 Favorite place to nap?
🏳️🌈 Are you a member of the LGBTQIA+ community?
🦋 Describe yourself in three words.
👖 Jeans or sweatpants?
🥤 What’s your go-to Starbucks order?
🧡 A color you can’t stand?
💎 What’s your most prized possession?
☕ Coffee or tea?
🦖 Favorite extinct animal?
🌙 How long have you been on tumblr?
🌴 Desert island item?
🐸 Describe your aesthetic.
🔮 What’s your dream job?
💙 Relationship status?
🌿 Describe your favorite outfit.
🎤 Is there a song you know all the lyrics to?
🤎 What color is your hair?
💌 Do you talk to yourself?
💄 Do you wear makeup?
🌸 Best compliment you ever received?
💞 @ your favorite blog.
Reblogs are appreciated!
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"32?" The voice of a young boy echoed through the hall, the voice of a free soul that didn't belong there.
"Mhm? What's up Khurshid?" A gentle voice responded to the boy, Khurshid, who was standing infront of 32.
"You! you're so mean you know? I told you my name but you haven't told me yours yet..." Khurshid pouted but he didn't seem actually angry. 32 shook his head offering him an awkward smile making his shiny hair swing from side to side.
"I'll tell you my name~ just wait abit okay?" 32 ruffled the young boy's hair " What did you wanna ask?" 32 asked trying to change the topic. To his surprise, Khurshid didn't protest, his face relaxed, he almost seemed perplexed.
"why... what are we doing exactly? I mean I know what we're doing but I really don't understand the point of it..." 32 looked at him, he looked stunned.
"What do we do exactly Khurshid? do you really know?" 32 patted the spot next to him, treating Khurshid like a cat.
"We kill people because he tells us to do so? and obviously we do that because they're bad people." he answered before taking a seat beside 32, usually he would get annoyed when 32 treated him like a kid but today he was too caught up with the orders to think about anything else.
"So you think we're doing this because of justice?" he looked at the young boy with curiosity.
"Not entirely but to some extent. If not so then why do we take the lives of others?"
"There is no bad person nor is there a good one. Good and Bad is just how we describe people based on their actions and choices, you would stand up for me if someone accused me of doing something bad right?" the younger boy immediately nodded.
" well why?" 32 tilted his head to the side looking at Khurshid with a amazed but not surprised look on his face.
"Cause I know you ? and I know that you're not the kind of person who would do something bad, on purpose at least. I've seen you help lots of the other kids here"
"Exactly. You've seen me help the kids get on the roll. You saw me choose someone else instead of myself and that's why you defend me, If I didn't help them, if I wasn't so friendly to you, you wouldn't stand up for me. you wouldn't know whether I am innocent or not, you would go around saying 'well 32 never helped the other kids so it wouldn't be of much shock if he did that. he was never a good person after all' right?" A wave of emotions rushed through Khurshid and he couldn't understand what they exactly were. Was it sadness? no Anger mayhaps?
"Khurshid," 32 kneeled down to match his height "People are defined by the choices they make and they make choices based on their purpose in life" 32 took Khurshid's hands that were now shivering. "we're not killing people because we want to, that's not our purpose. That's what he forced upon us, and there is no one other than himself who knows why."
Khurshid couldn't bare to look at 32, his head was lowered down in awe but he managed to get a sentence out.
"Then... What is our purpose?"
"Everyone has their own," suddenly his demeanor into a blissful one "I want to see the wonders this world has to offer! I've heard that there are these people who follow in the steps of Akivili! One day, when I get out of here I want to join them on their adventures and become a nameless!" He looked out the window, admiring the stars.
"...But I don't have a purpose..." Khurshid muttered, even the thought of 32 leaving scared him, what would he do then? would he just continue his life like this? killing people day to day?
"Then I'll share mine with you until you find yours."
"Let`s escape from this hell together"
--------
Nix- Story; Part III
-🍮anon (Hi hello I'm still alive, how are you Walp?)
HI I'VE MISSED YOU
Unfortunately image super busy lately so I don't even have time to write stuff 😭 can't even check my inbox more than one or two times a day
I'm still connecting the dots but I'm very invested in his Nix's story 👀
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Crow T Robot X Sensitive!PastelCore!Fem!Reader angst and comfort
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In all fairness, it's not your fault the Forresters liked to torment you. Though you don't know why. Maybe it's your sense of style? Mayhaps how sensitive your emotions are? Or perhaps they're just mean.
Either way though, Kinga/Clayton (Whoever you like better) said some rather harsh things while explaining which movie you and the gang were to be put through, which in turn lead to where you are now. Curled up in a ball and crying on one of the lower level of The Satellite Of Love.
You managed to calm down a bit after a while before you heard footsteps and the familiar voice of a certain yellow robot calling your name.
You looked down the hallway just as he stumbled into view, his arms bent in a weird raptor-like position. He looked your way and trotted his way next to you.
"Hey.. you alright, cakepop?" He asked with a small amount of worry lacing his tone. He put his clawed hand on your shoulder in an attempt to comfort you.
You look up at him with messed up makeup and puffy eyes, a light cringe creeps onto his visage. It's hard to tell, but it's there.
"Jeez, doll, I didn't know what they said hit you that hard."
"Did you expect anything less of me?"
he didn't know how to respond as you looked back down at the floor as more tears streamed from your eyes.
"Why do I have to be such a crybaby.."
He wrapped his arms around you and nuzzled his beak into your hair.
"Don't beat yourself up like that. They shouldn't be saying stuff like that to you in the first place. Besides you're not as much as a crybaby as you think you are."
"What makes you say that?"
"I've seen more people more sensitive and pathetic than you, babe. trust me. Besides, None of them were as kind and pretty as you."
A miniscule smile creeps onto your face as Crow holds onto your hands and helps you onto your feet. He brushes your hair out of your face before leading you down the hall towards the kitchen.
"I'm not too keen on this kind of stuff, but I heard that some water will help you calm dow-AAUGH!!"
Crow falls forward onto the floor as he trips over one of Gypsy's coils. you quickly help him back up and keep him standing while he gathers his bearings.
"Are you okay?"
"Yep.. I'm fine, Babe. C'mon lets go."
The two of you continue to the kitchen, Crow has you sit down as he grabs a glass of water for you. After a few minutes of chaotic banter and jokes from Crow he gets up and asks you a question.
"Hey, i need to go... do something really quick, will you be okay on your own or do i need to grab Gypsy real quick?"
"... what are you planning, Crow?"
"Oh nothing, I'm definitely not going to the upper level to throw some insults back at Kinga/Clayton, definitely not."
You couldn't tell if it was sarcasm, a joke, or a terrible lie, but it made you laugh all the same.
"There's no need, I'm sure karma will do its thing sooner or later."
"Alright fine, you do have a good point."
He lets out a light chuckle as he sits himself up on the table and crosses one leg over the other. He leans down and puts the tip of his beak against your forehead.
"Mwah. I can't actually kiss you so this is the next best thing i can think of. Mwah... Nevermind this feels ridiculous."
You snicker as he pulls away, you look into his unsettling eyes before surprising him with a kiss on the beak. Your tender moment with your chaotic robotic boyfriend was interrupted when the two of you were startled by a loud siren and flashing lights.
"TIME FOR THE MOVIE, DAMMIT!"
Before you could get up, Crow picks you up and rushes off towards the theater room. Time for your daily dose of jokes and psychological torture.
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"then once i started seeing some posts that got into the issues with peggy’s character post endgame, that was mentioned and it’s like oh yeah that really was on her, she was in charge, she made that choice even if it’s not explicitly said" -> YUP. i saw ppl say it was just misogynist stuckes complaining. No, it's because ENDGAME ITSELF SHOWED US THAT SHE WORKED AT A QUASI-FASCISTIC BLACK SITE W ZOLA *RIGHT THERE* IN THE 70s (also it's harder to stomach intelligence agency propaganda these days).
ppl calling ANY criticism of a woman (real or not) misogynistic really does not help when trying to call out actual instances of misogyny skjdfjs i hate it y’all there are valid criticisms especially in this case
like i said in my post i’d never seen people talk about it before and like a lot of my views on peggy and her relationship with steve were based on the way like most fanfiction i’ve read framed it (that hydra infiltrating shield was something terrible that happened to her organization, not something that she caused and that she and steve had a Grand And Tragic Love Story, not just. crushes on each other)
but the thing is reading all that fanfiction isn’t a thing that applies to a lot of fans so i don’t know how THEY buy into these narratives because it’s not really what marvel was telling us. sure, we were reminded multiple times over the years of peggy’s existence, but the word love was never used, not that it HAD to be, but the only instance was agent carter, which was also as stupid as endgame saying it but at least agent carter was like, following the loss of steve so you could understand overdramatizing things and her calling him the love of her life, even though he wasn’t a love at all lmao. like post catfa, and even catfa itself, the mcu does not go on about this Tragic Romance, it’s like barely touched on that steve and peggy had this almost relationship, really, until endgame hits you over the head with it, so they can justify their bad ending. so why do fans believe it makes sense??? literally everything that makes peggy and steve’s relationship a bigger deal than it was is fanon, the mcu itself didn’t really do that. it’s why at the time i thought steve/sharon was so much weirder bc i bought into this from all the fic i read and now i’m like......yeah, idt they needed to write peggy and sharon as related to begin with, BUT it’s not actually that icky bc he and peggy didn’t date, she really kinda was “just a woman he kissed one time” no offense lmao
and re: peggy bringing in zola and how fic frames it like, “oh man how terrible” as if she isn’t responsible, i have to wonder if the mcu would’ve delved into any sort of blame if we’d gotten an actual cap 3 that followed up with the events of catws, i mean probably not, especially not by 2016 bc wasn’t that around the time disney bought marvel and like.......everything went downhill. i mean i know these superhero movies were always gonna have a certain narrative about the military and intelligence agencies but it sure seems to have gotten worse when disney came on
idk i’m rambling but yeah like, i do get how a lot of fans don’t acknowledge peggy’s flaws bc i myself hadn’t thought about any of it before or seen any of the discourse surrounding her character, really, but it’s just kind of like, like you said, they just think it’s stuckies being misogynistic or whatever, but once you see the conversation being had, how can you just brush it off and act like she can’t be criticized, she brought zola in, *steve voice* peggy, you CHOSE to do that, it’s literally her fault hydra took over lmao
#Anonymous#ask#anti peggy carter#anti steggy#anti endgame#also........i understand thinking she was a badass in 2011 when catfa came out when we had few women in the mcu (we still do compared to me#but oh my god compared to agent carter she is truly kinda terrible in catfa#like........not even just the shooting at steve there are other times when it's like wow you are not great for him#did i actually respond to anything you were saying mayhaps not
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Messy solver symbols
Nori's solver powers seems very similar to Cyn's, perhaps representing a willing relationship? In contrast, Uzi seems to be the only one with the Disassembly drone look-alike solver form. I actually headcannon that a drone's solver form is based on their own life experiences, and it's less "the disassembly drones look like the solver form," and more "Uzi's solver form looks like a Disassembly drone because she's close with them." Cyn's centipede like form is probably related to being trapped un the dump for an indefinite amount of time.
[I am sorry you don't understand my level of thinking]
[Why did the chicken go to work? To get that...]
Tessa's being really gentle with N here
*Tries to put another image in* WHAT DO YOU MEAN I'VE EXCEEDED MY DAILY IMAGE UPLOAD LIMIT???? THAT'S A THING??????? Sigh... looks like we're continuing this thing in text Tessa: "I'll need you to choose the universe over one little drone, N." If you know anything about my thoughts on this show, it's probably that there is no way in hell that N's agreeing to this He might ponder it for a bit, but ultimately decide against it The sentinels not responding to Tessa's commands immediately are another piece of evidence towards her being a Cyborg. Her blood's still red, so she's at least part human, hence Cyborg and not robot clone. ... though, there is some association with the solver and red liquid... in any case, it convinced the sentinels Sentinel's visor: [Objective: eliminate AI targets] [ERROR: Blood detected] [Error: Lifeform detected] [objective: be a nice dino]
I wonder why Alice never saw Uzi's solver fully activating coming. She has, after all, "dealt with witches before" The power of friendship, mayhaps? I've said it before, and I'll say it again. If the DD's headbands are their true eyes, then why does V closing her's work? Why does V wearing sunglasses work?
Using the solver appeared to have cracked Uzi's visor pretty badly ("You said you could control the Sentinels!) V's aggression towards Tessa is still suspicious to me. ("What did she tell you?") She immediately assumes it's something bad. It's assumed she had a good relationship with Tessa in the manor, she should at least trust her a little bit if that were true... ("Ow, my fricken hea- N?!!) Uzi is so happy upon seeing him, and the emotional conflict in N's expression when she hugs him... The way Uzi hugs N here very much reminds me of how she hugged Kahn at the end of episode two, with the wordless, tight grip.... You know, she probably wasn't sure he would make it out of there alive... V notices N's conflicted expression and is, rightfully, worried V's glare at Tessa, and if the theory that the reflections in Tessa's helmet are her own expressions is correct, then she's glaring right back, before they both soften I wonder if the sentinel rebooting is using a function similar to the Zombie drone's resurrection Both V and N protest to Uzi using the solver, but each are unaware of the other's reasoning. Uzi's little bump at N is so infinitely cute The way Tessa refers to N as "her robot" is kind of yikes DOLL, WHAT IS YOUR PLAN HERE? YOU UNLEASH THE SENTINELS ON THEM, HAVE THE AUDACITY TO LOOK REMORESEFUL, THEN JUMP DOWN AN ELEVATOR SHAFT. WHY DO YOU DO THE THINGS YOU DO???????? And she left the elevator for them, which kind of contradicts her move with the sentinels The sentinels flash, [WARNING: NULL] when trying to identify Tessa, Null being something with heavy association with the solver. heh V climbing onto the ceiling as the Sentinels approach hmmm, the shot of Tessa's blood turning silver for a moment... looks like Cyborg Casting me in cold... bury me in bones.... So, who's ready for episode 7? Airs in three hours
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Murder Drones episode 6 Analysis
The final Analysis before episode 7
Text: [Office Organizer] [Interweb explorer] [... Drone]
Text: [I❤️ late stage capitalism] [Work > personal life] [Sheep need vacations from their vacations; Wolves need jobs from their jobs]
Fun fact: her locker (029) is right next to Yeva's in the Final Destination trailer
Tessa trying to pick up N like she used to
Tessa complaining about the air being toxic is 1 point towards her being human
HA-! This might actually be the first time Uzi's actually bitten someone
Whatever makes you feel better about yourself, J How *did* Tessa get her hands on a J clone, anyway? I'd say this is a point towards solver-possessed Tessa theory
I love they're banter
If you've read my episode 3 analysis, then you'd know my personal belief on this matter is the solver was killing as many drones as possible in an attempt to create more solver-infected zombie drones
I see your just as derogatory as usual, J I think this is the first time J has openly insulted N in front of Tessa, though
Why does Doll give Tessa the Keybug, only to immediately steal it back? Was it something in their conversation? Is Doll with the solver and doesn't want them to continue investigating? Is she trying to bait them? Is this simply a "last minute, changed my mind" type thing? Because V is here? .... Probably the last one tbh
-stumble
-u good?
-Shut up!
-to create more zombie drones Maybe there's a mechanism to infect dead drones with the solver, and they're stockpiling as many as possible?
On the "Tessa is possessed by the solver/Cyn" theory, she seems to think of Cyn and the Solver as the same entity, not to mention that at this point, Cyn is probably against the solver, at least somewhat. This could be a bluff, but it would be an odd thing to specify if it was.
J's disappointed and confused at being left behind. As much as I love J and Tessa's relationship, I do find this an issue that needs to be addressed.
"My crazed ramblings!" energy
Good question, Uzi
She just wants to know what's happening
Doll was probably working with Tessa in the first place for answers, just like Uzi, but something made her defect. While it could've been V's presence, it's still an open question Tessa's probably planning to eliminate Doll as well. Maybe she found out about that plan, somehow, and that's why she turned on Tessa?
The way Uzi swooped around a lot on her way down, and how she lands <3 Tessa, stop playing with N's hair, that's weird
Uzi's tail go chomp on N's hat
#murder drones#murder drones analysis#murder drones theory#n murder drones#serial designation v#uzi doorman#v murder drones
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Little Lamb - Aemond Targaryen x Reader (Chapter 10)
Aemond Targaryen x You – Chapter 1
Word count: 3933 words
Summary: As a maiden of a noble house, it is your duty to wed well. But how will you manage to, with a curious and possessive Prince in the picture?
WARNINGS: Violence, misogyny, dub-con (kind of)
Spotify Playlist – AO3 Page
Chapter 10: Solemn Oaths
Riding on Vaghar was not as terrifying as you had anticipated. Perhaps you felt devoid of emotions and tired, but when Prince Aemond rustled you out of your sleep, and you saw the dragon a distance away, you were not actually afraid, which surprised the both of you.
“So that is Vaghar.” You say calmly, watching the she-dragon as she faced the two of you. You did not know how to read her expressions, as this was the first time you have ever seen a dragon up close, but by her lack of noise, you assume that she too was calm enough and would not eat you alive. The she-dragon was massive, bigger than you could have even imagined, and though calm, she still had a threatening aura.
As you watched Vaghar, Aemond watched you. The blonde had set you to your legs, knowing that Vaghar would not respect any sign of weakness. As you stood before her, you attempted to assure yourself that all would be fine, and that Aemond would not let anything bad happen to you.
The Prince’s relationship with his dragon has been turbulent. When he was young and had become her dragonrider, he felt as though he were a God, one that all should fear. Only through tragedy did he learn that Targaryens did not actually control dragons, rather that it was merely an illusion. Thus, he was cautious in not forcing you to meet Vaghar until you were ready.
“Yes, that is Vaghar.”
As he spoke, Vaghar took a massive leap towards the two of you, and up close, you felt more threatened. Immediately, Aemond place himself before you, his arm raised before him.
“Vēdros daor, ñuhys raqiros.”
Immediately, Vaghar kneeled enthusiastically, as though she knew that she was about to fly. You had no idea what Aemond’s words meant, but you knew that it was Valyrian. Sometimes at night, the Prince would mutter incoherent sentences and only now do you realise that it was only incoherent to you, as it was likely spoken in the ancient tongue.
“Come.” Aemond pulled on your forearm, but you remained in place. You felt almost silly; you were not completely terrified of Vaghar, but you were terrified of dying, which is what you believed would happen if you followed the one-eyed Prince.
Aemond speaks your name softly. “Come.”
You shake your head in a response, shutting your eyes in unease. Sighing, Aemond turned to face you and softly kneading the back of his hand against your cheek.
“Tell me your worries.”
You contemplate just ignoring him and running back to Thunder Fort, but decide against it, as you believed that Vaghar would chase after you as if you were a prey. Biting your lip, you answer the Prince.
“I am going to die before we make it to King’s Landing, aren’t I?” You say witlessly. This only causes Aemond to chuckle. Opening your eyes, you see Aemond looking at you endearingly.
“You are not going to die.” He responds, holding back a grin.
“How would you know? Have you ever ridden with someone else on Vaghar before?” You say accusingly, not liking his dismissing attitude.
“Once.” The one-eyed Prince responds ominously, before urging you to go with him.
You think about pressing on the matter but decide against it. Mayhap it is not smart to irritate a dragonrider when his frighteningly massive war dragon is right in front of you. Sighing, you let him pull you towards Vaghar, and your heart races like it never has in your life before.
Getting on Vaghar and the journey to King’s Lading might as well have never happened, because your memory of it is practically ceased to exist. As Aemond helped you onto Vaghar and buckled you in, you felt as though you were not actually in your body, but rather a spectator. It felt as though your spirit vacated your body, and all that was left was an emotionless bag of blood and bones.
Being so high above the ground felt surreal, the air tighter and colder than you could have ever imagined (the idea of this did not even occur to you). You do not know how long you flew for, or what Aemond was thinking, as he sat before you with his back to you, your hands securely clasped around his waist. Throughout the ride, you lean against him for emotional support and focused your sight on the sky, which was like an everchanging painting. At first, the clouds were heavy and the sky dim, but the landscape got brighter and clearer the closer the three of you reached for the capitol. You tried to see how long you could stare at the sun, but it was too blinding to be for long. Soon, the sky started bleeding, with pink and red hues plaguing the sky, and you found yourself beginning to enjoy the flight.
Occasionally you heard speak to Vaghar, in what you presumed was Valyrian, given that you did not understand it. Aemond did also try to speak to you though at times, when the air around you was more calm and your heart steadied.
“What did your sister say to you?”
You ignored him though, and feigned sleep, shutting your eyes whilst leaning more into him, and you could feel a disappointed sigh release from him.
When you returned to King’s Landing and the Red Keep, it was as though you never left.
Your days continued as they had before, with you fulfilling your duties to the Targaryen Family, and as did your nights, with Prince Aemond still visiting at late hours for some conversation and sleep. You also did not fail to notice how your visit back home was rarely mentioned in conversation, at least with you. Then again, who did you talk to other than the Targaryens. You had no other friends at the Keep, although Lord Larys Strong does continue trying to be, finding opportunities every day to grace his unwelcome presence and offer of friendship to you.
Aemond opted to ignore your shared journey to the stormlands, instead choosing to discuss his new favourite subject of conversation: your wedding.
He insists upon a grand affair, which you opposed, for you see no point in having a big celebration if your loved ones were not there to celebrate it with you. The very notion of being wed to a Targaryen Prince felt very surreal to you, and you felt detached, opining little with regards to the celebration. If Aemond discerned your hollow attitude, he did not show it.
“We will start preparations for our wedding immediately after Jaehaerys’s oath ceremony.”
Following Jaehaerys and Jaehaera’s tenth nameday many moons ago, King Aegon’s small council thought it prudent that the Lords and Ladies of the Seven Kingdoms swear fealty to the King’s heir, Prince Jaehaerys, promising to honour and defend his rights of succession. Especially considering that following the war, many houses had new heads. Many of these heads were also now women, as many widows had been left to lead. This oath ceremony had been fast approaching, and though you were not involved in its arrangements, you knew that your Aemond was, which is why the two of you could not be wed yet.
Aemond’s brother, Prince Daeron was away at Oldtown (you assumed that this had something to do with the oath ceremony), so you had yet to speak to him, meanwhile the Queen Alicent would skirt around you, hardly saying a word relating to your arrangement with her son, nor anything about your trip, except for when the two of you had arrived.
Upon your return from Storm’s End with the one-eyed Prince, the two of you were immediately escorted you to the small council chambers, where along with Queen Alicent and the small council, you silently waited for the arrival of King Aegon. It was well past dinner, and the King had retired to his chambers; naturally, he was the last one to arrive, and the council chamber was tensely quiet before he did.
As you stood at one end of the table, with Aemond’s arm firmly fixed around your waist, you avoided the stares of everyone present, which included Lord Wylde, who you were sure would not celebrate your union. Judging by the lack of surprise by how inappropriately close you and Prince stood together, you also understood that your situation with Aemond was not as concealed as you once thought, and that you had only deluded yourself into believing so. Evidently, your indiscretions were simply ignored, and you had no doubt that it was due to the fear that the Kinslayer garners.
Only after King Aegon entered the council chambers did the silence finally break, with him directly addressing you, for the first time ever since you stepped foot into King’s Landing. The sickly-looking King, his untidy hair and still dressed in his evening robes, sang your name before speaking.
“It is a shame that the lord’s right to the first night is no longer customary.”
As the King spoke, you see him glance over you from the other end of the long table, where he sat, as though you were meat at a butcher’s shop. You also feel Aemond’s fingers dig into your side, which makes you slightly wince. In the year that you have spent at the Keep with the Targaryens, you have understood Aegon to be a rash King, one that acts at the whim of his impulses, unlike his younger brother, who is calculating and cunning.
“Brother, what amusement is there with the abolished entitlements of lords when you are King.”
An underlying menacing tone echoes through the one-eyed Prince’s response, and some resentment you realise. Feeling mortified, you avoid Aegon’s stare, and look at the Queen Mother instead, who has a sympathetic expression on her face. You do not know what to expect, and slightly lean into Aemond, as though it would protect you, and as your nerves overcome you, you slowly begin picking on your fingers.
“Hmm… you are not wrong, little brother. And I welcome your Lady as though she were my own sister.” You have no doubt that the double meaning was not missed by anyone, and you feel your stomach turn. No one comments on this though, and you can feel Aemond’s barely restrained anger seethe from him. The King pauses to yawn before continuing.
“I do not believe a meeting so late in the evening is necessary. Our Prince Aemond wishes to marry? Let him. I do not have any desire for him to be a Kingslayer as well. He can marry a harlot for all I care. If anyone has any objections, voice them now. Otherwise, I bid you all a good night.” The King stood in his place for a few moments, looking over everyone, before impatiently finishing.
“Lovely– the matter is settled then.”
As the King quickly slipped away, others in the room followed. Some congratulated the Prince and you, meanwhile Queen Alicent and Lord Strong lingered behind. The Mother Queen smiled at the two of you, grasping hold of your hand and pulling you away from Aemond, welcoming you, which made you feel relieved, as you anticipated much worse. This relief was brief though, as Lord Larys begins a quiet conversation with you as Prince Aemond talks with his mother.
���Best wishes on your union, my Lady.” The gaunt man slightly lowered his head, and you thanked him, forcing a smile.
“If I may impart some counsel, as a friend.” You look at him, pressing your lips together, and nod, for what harm can words do. At this, master of whisperers smiled and spoke lowly.
“Though wolves are trustworthy, they are not a threat to dragons. I would be wary with who I trust.”
His advice shocks you, and you are reminded of your sister Lauryn’s parting words. How could Lord Larys know anything about it? You unconsciously look at Aemond in poorly concealed despair, only to see him staring at the two of you with hard eyes.
Queen Helaena remained her usual self, talking about things which you had little understanding of, relating to the spiders and winter. Like her siblings and mother though, she spoke no word about your trip, but shared her excitement about your union to her brother.
“I always wished for a sister when I was little.” This made you smile warmly, and you impulsively embraced the young Queen in affection (thankfully, she returned it, albeit a little apprehensively).
It was mostly the children who curiously asked about your time away, and the place you grew up.
Maelor wanted to know about the skies in the stormlands, and whether the weather would make it difficult to ride a dragon there; Maelor’s dragon egg had recently, which excited the young boy, who aspired to be a great dragonrider like his uncles. Jaehaerys, the eldest, on the other hand, would cautiously ask vague questions relating to the journey, rather than your time there. Through him you understood that someone has probably instructed people at court to not speak word about your visit, but as it is in a child’s nature to be curious, the three young Targaryens did not listen. Jaehaera on the other hand, inquisitively asked about your family and life, with many detailed and intrusive questions relating to your childhood, and failed to hide her jealousy when you spoke of your youngest sisters and how pleased you were to see them after missing them for so long. It took a lot of assurance and promise of cake to lift her spirits again.
And so, the weeks passed and the Keep steadily came alive again. Modest parties of lords and ladies from across the Seven Kingdoms arrived at King’s Landing, and soon there was no room at the Keep. As a Lady-in-Waiting, you found yourself more oft than not greeting these noble people with the Targaryen family, many of whom you realised were quite young (unsurprising given that their predecessors most likely perished during the war).
The first you greeted was the young Lord Kermit Tully, who arrived with his girl bride Myrielle Peake, along with her father, Lord Unwin Peake, the Head of House Peake, the oldest of whom constantly appeared unimpressed by everything. Following them though, you lost count and found yourself during the evenings sequestered in your chambers, noting down on parchment the people you met, using an extensive genealogy book you borrowed from the Keep’s library to aid your efforts.
You would have no need for it if Aemond had been there, but the both of you knew that it would be unwise for him to spend nights with you with so many guests at the Keep, much to the Prince’s displeasure, who tried to convince you to stay with him at his chambers.
“Let them talk behind closed doors. What does it matter to us?”
“It should. We cannot give them any reason to not pledge loyalty to Jaehaerys.” Sighing, the Prince conceded, and now, the two of you spent less time together, and almost always with his family. The one-eyed Prince still would find opportunities to touch and hold you though, with a hand on your upper back when walking together, and a discrete hand on your thigh during dinners. He relished in your surprised reaction, which you always failed to hide, and others noticed how a side smile frequently plastered on his face when he was with you.
Following the ceremony, an immodest celebratory feast was to be held in honour of the new pledges, and this demanded the prolonged stay of the guests that arrived earlier.
It took some days before all of the invited guests had gathered, and you had been tasked with keeping the Ladies present entertained. This proved to not be a difficult matter, for all you had to do was arrange for food and drinks to be ever flowing at the Royal Gardens, and bards to be always present, composing personalised ballads for the noblewomen. The Queens nor the children were present for these gatherings, but thankfully, bonding with these women was not as difficult as you had initially anticipated.
Many of the Ladies were the wives or the Heads of their respective Houses, such as the widowed Lady Johanna Lannister, who you found intimidating at first. However, thw two of you soon had lively conversation; her dry sense of humour made you laugh, and she was a formidable woman that you came to respect. Nevertheless, she scared you, as the tales of her brutality, such as her gelding of Rodrik Greyjoy, a salt son from the Iron Islands, further making him her youngest son's fool. This was a story well known throughout the lands, and you still maintained cautiousness around her, as well as the other women present, as these were women capable of horrifying deeds.
It is important to mention that you only entertained the company of noblewomen (as well as some children who had journeyed with their mothers to visit the capitol), which is why it was surprising that during one of these afternoon, alone into the Gardens, came striding a towering and well-built, dark-haired man, dressed in attire uncharacteristic of capitol fashions.
As he did, you see many of the women present slightly back and gasp. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as you realised that he was approaching towards where you were, under shade with a Lady from a minor House in the Riverlands. As he came closer, with a hand upon his sheaved sword, the burly man called upon you while lowering his head. As he did, his deep voice echoed, and the Lady you were conversing with subtly cowered behind you.
“Forgive me, my Lady, for disrupting your peace.”
You cock your head in response and smile, remembering to remain courteous despite his daunting presence. You could show no weakness, as some of the women around you would remember it and could use it against you in the future.
“There is nothing to forgive, Lord …” You trail off, waiting for the nobleman to introduce himself. Much taller than you (and even Aemond), you find yourself looking up at him.
“Lord Cregan Stark, my Lady.”
As he speaks, his stare is direct and demanding, and you feel yourself unable to pull away. Unlike his demeanour, his dark eyes are warm and full of life. Smiling, you bow, recognising the Lord of Winterfell by name alone, of course. As you do, the Stark stops you.
“Please, there is no need for such formalities. Your kin is my kin after all.”
Lauryn. It makes sense now, why the mighty Lord was here, seeking you out, a woman of no consequence. In fact, you feel a little silly now, having not recognized him immediately, for his physical similarity to his cousin, Brandon Stark, was striking.
“I am not good with words, but if your Lady does not oppose, may I have a moment of your time.”
As he speaks, your eyes stray to the women around you, who you see are attentively listening. While it would be inappropriate for Lord Stark to be alone with you, you know that it would be disreputable for you to reject him, and perhaps even scandalous. Your mind strays to the thought of what happened to the last time you had spent time alone with a man other than the Prince, but you decide that the huge Northman before you would not be in similar peril.
Smiling, you nod and offer your arm for him to take. As he does, you lead him towards the grand tree, a distance away from the rest of the women, but still in their field of view. As you walk away, you begin conversing the towering man.
“My dear sister Lauryn speaks highly of the North and Winterfell. She loves it there. Thank you for welcoming her so warmly into your home.” You say, smiling as you.
Actually, Lauryn had said no such things, for you have barely spoken to her, nor have you even any idea of what the North is like, but it seemed appropriate. You were also trying to shift the frown off the Lord’s face, but failed, as he stared ahead apathetically.
“There is no need for thanks. The North is harsh, but we take care of our own at Winterfell.”
“I thank you, nevertheless.” Winterfell was where your sister wed her husband, the cousin of Lord Cregan Stark. Life at the North was difficult, so much so that at their wedding, only your mother and brother were present, as no more mouths could be fed. You were no fool regarding the sacrifice it took to look after women and children in Winterfell, and Lauryn was well looked after.
“How may I help you, my Lord?”
As you ask, the two of you reach the grand tree, and you face Lord Cregan. The man had a rough look to him, with unruly hair, thick facial hair and a well-built figure which only strengthened his baleful demeanour. You could understand the fears and intrigue of the others ladies present, as they observed you from a distance, as though you were animals at a menagerie. Lord Cregan was ruggedly handsome, and you had no doubt that some of the women here wished to secure an alliance with the man. If memory served you well, his wife had died a few years ago, and he had yet to remarry.
Following your gaze, the Stark Lord turned around. As he did, all of the ladies turned away, feigning disinterest, and this served only to irritate the Northman.
“Words and women. Those are the two things I have never excelled at.” The grisly Lord proclaimed, turning back to face you, speaking in a lower tone, his voice tensely coarse.
“I do not understand the matters of woman, nor how to ask about them, so I shall ask you directly. Are you being forced by the Kinslayer?” Your eyes widen with shock as he speaks, taken aback by his candour, and it takes a few moments for you to muster a dim response.
“What?”
Sighing, the Lord relaxed his shoulders and repeated himself.
“Has the Kinslayer been dishonourable with you? You are a noble Lady of a house which House Stark considers an ally, and the Prince and his family come from a line of oathbreakers. You can be honest, for you are nothing but a victim here.” As he finishes speaking, you feel your confusion shift into anger. Crossing your arms, you tilt your chin up, directing yourself at him with conviction.
“You really must not understand the matters of women, my Lord, nor have a way with words, for I take offence to being called a victim." You huff out, vexed by the notion of being perceived as naive little girl destined to a fatal end. Staring back at the burly man defiantly, you continue. As you do, the Northman stares at you flabbergasted. Your reaction was not one that he had anticipated, for he did not judge you to be of a headstrong nature, and in addition to shock, his interest has been spurred.
“I do not need any man to rescue me from my circumstance, nor will I ever ask anything of a man. If I ever do face trouble, I am more than capable of saving myself.” Huffing out, you uncross your arms, positioning them to your side, unconsciously clenching your fists. “I thank you for all that your House has done for my sister. Please excuse me, I must return to my duties.”
Curtsying slightly, you leave furious, not waiting to hear back from the Stark Lord. As you face and approach the noblewomen again, you see many staring at you in shock and horror, and you contemplate whether you have acted rash and foolishly. Taking a deep breath, you smile at the women staring at you, and storm back into the Keep.
Author’s Note: Translation for “Vēdros daor, ñuhys raqiros.” is “Don’t be angry, my friend.”
I know that the twins are supposed to be eight years old at 131 AC, but I felt like they needed to be a little older, particularly because if I were a Lord, I would not be pledging unreserved loyalty to an overgrown toddler. In my defense though, this story obviously is not canon whatsoever. Also, I am so excited to finally write about my fav himbo, Creg Stark <3
Hope you are having a lovely day!
– Chapter 11
Tags: girl-obsessed-with-things 404slayer404 moonmaiden1996 rosaryos roseanimelover jovialfanatic wishfulwithwine missusnora maat-the-prescriptive @let-love-bleeds-red shnadaidas klutzyfreak mistalli pearlstiare nctma15 weepingfashionwritingplaid ihaveadogithink verycollectivecreator @thelibraperspective eddies-bat-tattoos marcs-luver kpopdistoyedmylife-blog solacestyles lonadane
#aemond targaryen#Aemond x Reader#aemond x y/n#aemond x you#aemond targaryen x you#aemond targaryen x reader#aemond targaryen fanfiction#aemond#house of the dragon#aemondtargaryen!thots#hotd
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ANGST YOU SAY: Kurogane and Fai finding out that the vampire blood isn't actually gone at all. It's weeks after they've left Clow so they were sure it was fine since Fai hadn't felt the need for it. You can choose how it actually comes to light.
did this take me weeks (months?) mayhaps. enjoy some sad vampires (tw: blood)
It began a few worlds after Clow, early into their new journey with Syaoran while Sakura stayed behind. Fai began looking pale, his skin ashen. His footsteps dragged and despite his insistence that he was fine, he grew weaker with each day.
“It’s just a cold,” He said when Kurogane voiced his concern. “I just need some rest.”
But rest did not help. And Kurogane, being as perceptive as he was, did not miss the fact that the mage had stopped eating. His cheeks began to look sunken in, his eyes hollow. He was beginning to more resemble a walking corpse than anything.
And Kurogane had seen it once before; when Fai refused to drink his blood after Tokyo, refusing himself sustenance and strength, he had the same weak, deathly appearance. Maybe that should have tipped Kurogane off sooner. But the vampire blood was supposed to be nullified with the return of Fai’s magic.
Supposed to be.
But this time it was worse because before, he would eventually give in and drink Kurogane's blood. Now, he was continuing to grow weaker and weaker. When he tried to eat, giving into the worry shared by Mokona and Syaoran, he couldn’t keep it down. He complained more and more of splitting headaches. It culminated when they landed in a new world and, after just two steps, Fai’s knees buckled and he crumpled to the ground. Burning up, panting for breath, it was clear that this was more than just an illness and Kurogane grew angry at himself for not forcing the mage to open up sooner.
When Fai woke, it was in the rented apartment the others had found with Kurogane sitting on the edge of the bed. “Kuro-sama,” He said weakly. “Sorry. I worried you, didn’t I?”
“And you’re gonna keep worrying me unless you tell me what the hell’s going on,” Kurogane told him bluntly.
“I’m sick,” Fai tried to say.
“You’re not,” Kurogane snapped. He sighed and held his right hand up. With a swirl of magic, Ginryuu appeared in his palm. “I don’t want to force you, but there's no time to wait for you to be honest.”
He unsheathed Ginryuu and Fai’s eyes widened. “Wait, Kuro—”
Kurogane cut into his arm and his blood flowed. The strength Fai lacked recently appeared all at once as he quickly moved across the bed. Within half a second he was knelt at Kurogane’s side, Kurogane’s arm in his hands and his lips over the wound. He drank down the blood without giving himself even a moment to breathe.
“I knew it,” Kurogane said once Fai had gotten a good fill.
Fai paused and lifted his eyes. Blood smeared messily around his mouth. His left eye, the one that had been taken and returned, still shone bright blue. The right one, however, the one that had remained when he had been imbued with vampire blood, shimmered dazzling gold.
Fai released Kurogane’s arm and glanced away, shamefully wiping the blood from his lips. “Why didn’t you just tell me?” Kurogane asked him.
“...The vampire was supposed to be gone,” Fai responded quietly.
“But it isn’t,” Kurogane said. “So why not—”
“Because, it was supposed to be!” Fai snapped at him. He swallowed and leaned back, eyeing Kurogane’s prosthetic arm. Quietly, almost fearfully, he continued, “Haven’t you shed enough blood for me? The one good thing about getting my magic back was that you didn’t need to hurt yourself anymore. So when I felt it starting to come back, I just… I didn’t…”
Fai lowered his eyes, the gold fading back to blue. Already, the color was beginning to return to his face. Kurogane frowned at the mage. “You know you don’t need to feel guilty about any of that. I’ve told you a hundred times.”
Fai took a moment to respond, took in a shuddering breath. “I don’t… want to be this,” He admitted quietly.
Kurogane’s shoulders slumped in defeat. There it was. The honesty Fai had been holding back all this time. “I know,” Kurogane told him.
Because he could understand. If the roles had been reversed and he had been forced against his will to become a vampire, a demon, he would have resented the predator inside of him as well. The innate hunter that grew inside of him without his say and took over his senses. One drop of blood and the monster broke free.
And of course, Fai was no monster. Fai was kind, loving, the kind of person anyone would be lucky to know. That was why Kurogane did not regret anything he did to keep Fai alive. But Fai's worst enemy was his own mind and his own thoughts about himself.
“Just… let me know next time so it doesn’t get to this point again,” Kurogane told him. “You don’t have to tell anyone else about it. It’s just me and you. Okay?”
Fai looked at Kurogane and nodded. He did not smile, did not try to hide the look of shame and despair written all over his face. It saddened Kurogane, but at least it was better than a lie. Kurogane reached out and took Fai’s hand and they sat there together until the blood on his arm dried up and scabbed over.
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Request for anon: Can I have Present mic, Aizawa, and all might where they learn their young student is fatherless? Like... their father walked out/went to prison when they were young. I'm sorry if this is time consuming, but I can't stop sobbing over my father.
I'm the situation baby but remember it wasn't your fault
I changed it up a little bit with Mics- I hope you don't mind
Present Mic:
• from the getgo something was wrong
• The moment you walked into class he could tell
• You looked like shit
• Dark bags under your eyes, hair messily brushed, just to get it out if your face, and your eyes were a light red.
• You didn't look particularly happy to be there either
• something turns in his stomach, a gut feeling that something really had went down
• And he hated seeing his students upset
• but he was relatively close to you to begin with, his felt different
• He felt like he had to do something
• Everyone settled into their seats as the bull rung but his eyes remained on you
• You honestly didn't pay attention during the lesson
• He could tell as much
• class finishes and the bell rings but you sit still, and it's not until most of the students have trickled out of the room do you start packing up
• He walks over and kneels in front of the desk "You okay there? You don't look so good," he looks concerned and his heart drops when he sees your lip start to quiver
• It takes you 0.27 seconds to break and you're frantically wiping your eyes as sobs wrack your body
• He's got his arms wrapped around you in seconds and you're leaning into his shoulder.
• He isn't sure exactly how long you're crying for but eventually you calm down enough to get out a coherent sentence
• "My-My dad was arrested Friday night. He won't tell me why- he won't let anyone else tell me why and I don't know what else to do," you cry, "I miss him so much and its only been a few days- I don't- I don't have anyone else, Mr. Hazashi,"
• And you're crying again.
• He has you take the rest of the day off, in fact he takes the day with you
• He calls in a sub (you don't know what strings he had to pull for that but you don't ask, at this point you don't care) and you two dip
• He takes you to get food, real food, that'll make you feel better
• He knows that'll help a little
• and after that he takes you to get something sweet- that tends to help mood and blood pressure and anxiety
• So he does his best with you
• He nutures you the best way he knows how
• if you need anything and I mean ANYTHING this man has you covered
• He does his best to step up in any way he can
• first off he extends his assignment deadlines and cancels two tests. Who needs them anyway.
• And you eat lunch in his classroom because he can well tell you don't want to talk to anyone else right now
• He closes it off (seemingly) so in reality its just you and him
• He'll probably tell Aizawa too but on the downlow (just so he knows)
• When holidays roll around, the dorms close.
• In this case- he let's you stay with him. He has an extra bedroom. He doesn't want you to stay in an empty house.
• You also get his phone number (which you gladly use) for anything really
• Bored? He'll deliver some shitty puns.
• Confused about homework? Text him.
• having a mental breakdown? He's got you covered.
• You got memes? Please for the love of God send them to him.
• The dynamic eventually shifts to a VERY father daughter relationship.
• He knows he'll never replace your dad. He understands that wholeheartedly, but he wants you to have someone
• He actually gets a letter from your dad, thanking him for taking care of you
• but he really doesn't mind
Aizawa:
• He had a feeling that there was something going on at home. Or rather, a lack of something.
• He's dealt with it in the oast- with himself and with past students and current ones
• Shinsou
• I mean, aside from that fact whenever parents were mentioned, you'd either stiffen up or wrinkle your nose
• You didn't really like the subject of parents
• There was an essay prompt about parents (nothing too personal) nd you ended up writing it on the extinction of dinosaurs and why God fucked up instead
"It'd be absolutely stellar to see huge lizards roaming the earth and occasionally stepping on people, you know? Jurassic park was onto something."
• Man's couldn't even fail you on it because it was written v well
• Anyway, he doesn't pry too much. He just silently figures it out by process if elimination and pattern.
• He doesn't really care too much
• In the sense if it doesn't define you and he doesn't help you because he pities you
• he helps you because he seems potential
• He takes you under his wing with shinsou
• Yall spend a whole summer training
• And that's when it all came out
• It was an accident really.
• Shinsou was tired, exhausted really
• and when people get tired- that tired- sometimes they spout random shot they wouldn't usually say
• and thats what he did
• he went on about his home life
• and if he could, you could too right?? You could trust them.
• "My dad walked out when I was a kid. Little, like 3. I have a few pictures of him holding me, but I guess it wasn't enough. I don't have any desire to meet him. Not anymore. But it left me feeling like I did something wrong? I guess? Which I suppose is why I train. Because then I feel strong. Which is a good difference from how it usually feels."
• He knew it.
• He called it.
• He was right again.
• He reassures you that you are good enough, strong enough, and his decision to leave had nothing to do with you
• and when he saw you give him a soft smile, he warmed.
• I mean really, it only goes up from there
• he'll deny it, or grumble under his breath, but he seems you two as his own
• Like these aren't my kids but they are my kids
• When dorms close on holiday yall get to stay because that's where he lives too
• Like if you chose too
• he's not gonna force you to stay but if you don't want to go home, you don't have too
• He has that power
• He will buy you food
• all you gotta do is ask
• and he'll roll his eyes and grumble something he doesn't really mean, just secretly happy that you feel comfortable enough around him to ask for something
• lmao family group chat
S: 'Hey Mr. Aizawa I found this cat. Hold on lemme send a pic'
A: 'Dont need a pic. Bring him home'
Y: 'What if he's ugly??'
A: 'gremlin. Bring him home.'
Or
Y: 'Hey I saw this tweet that said 'kids be like watch this and do a half roundhouse spin kick clap and waste my fucking time' and it make me think of you.'
S: @ mr. Aizawa when he has to watch deku do sumn
Y: Lmaoooo like when he threw the baseball
S: LMAOO
A: Me watching you too try to figure out how to beat me in training
Y: Yikes bro
S: That was a rough one
• Does he regret giving you and shinsou his number??
• Maybe
• Not really
• Lmao super secret lunch movie days
• Every week on wendesday yall watch a movie. Usually it takes 2 or 3 days to watch the movie since lunch is only 70 minutes
• @ you accidently calling him dad one day and shinsou snickering but it stuck
• dadzawa lmaoo
Allmight:
• Man's has 2 underlings.
• You and Deku.
• Picked you up when he started teaching at UA
• Ion know let's say one day you popped off bc he said some dumb shit and you were like no sir that's clearly wrong
• schooled him in his own damn subject
• the other kids were like 😳
• what the fuck
• Anyway
• He see's you have potential
• And though he's not the best teacher, you seem to respond better to the way HE was taught
• So tbh its easier to teach you
• 'okay, now I want you to beat the shot out if that wall,'
'Okay lmao bet'
• Midoriya is like, hey mayhaps we should analyze the situation
• N ur like noe
• You just don't give a fuck
• about anything really
• other than moving up the ranks
• But even then- its not a super super big deal, you're just gonna do your best but you aren't gonna stress
• However he noticed a pattern w you (even before Midoryia brought it up to him)
• You don't let anyone in
• Midoryia knows a bit more than the other students but that's really only because he's always with you
• a good majority of the week he's w you
• but its not really a deep connection
• you don't rely on either of them
• You do your best to do things on your own.
• He knows midoryias life story
• he knows why he acts the way he does
• but he doesn't know why you do
• he has a gut feeling it could be the same as midoryia
• I mean he already had one kid who's dad dipped
• he'll surely be able to figure out you too??
• So he makes himself a promise that he'll figure it out and he'll become someone you trust
• And he does just that
• When you tell him about your nightmare of a family history he's like mm, makes sense
• but he's happy that you trust him!!!
• He's a BIG suckered for movie nights
• he's got popcorn, snacks, candy, chocolate, soda- he's prepared
• list of movies lined out all ready
• I lowkey feel like he'd be into lord of the rings or fast n furious
• fast n furious at LEAST
• He's really into American action movies
• and he has no problem sharing those movies with you
• he doesn't have a whole ton of money, like he's not rich, but if you or midoryia need something he's definitely there to get it for you
• even if ur like fam no you don't need too
• he'll buy yell food a lot
• a l o t
• and cards
• when you and midoryia get him a father's day card he thinks he's gonna cry
• You guys also have a group chat
• 'da faemilee'
• Y: "Hey dad do you have milk?"
A: "???? Do I have milk????"
Y: "ya I'm looking in your fridge n ion see any???"
A: "How'd you even get in????"
Y: "Izuku."
I: "lmaoo"
Or
Y: Izuku you dumb bitch I left for ONE day
Y: And you got into a fight with Bakugou
I: He wanted to throw hands. I just did what you would do.
A: He's got you there
Or
A: What do you guys want for dinner
I: Sushi
Y: Chicfila
Y: Izu square up
I: K
Or
Y: Izu is fighting kacchow again
A: Beat his ass young midoriya
Y: Lmaoooooo
#hizashi x daughter reader#hizashi x reader#aizawa x hizashi#hizashi yamada#yamada hizashi#present mic#present mic x reader#aizawa x child reader#aizawa x daughter reader#aizawa x reader#aizawa shouta#shouta aizawa#eraserhead#all might#all might x reader#mha toshinori
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A Kindling: Chapter Eighteen
(AO3 counterpart here.)
The next evening, Firepaw was on his way to bring the hag another bird when Bluestar stepped in front of him and stopped him in his tracks.
“That will be enough for now,” she said.
Firepaw blinked and set down the prey. “Did I do something wrong?”
“No.” Bluestar was curt enough to make Firepaw worry that he had indeed made a mistake, but then she looked over at the hag dozing at the foot of the stump. “I need to speak with her first.”
Firepaw watched as Bluestar walked with a severe expression up to the hag and loomed over her. The hag barely opened one eye to look up at the leader.
“You’ve sat around eating our prey for long enough,” Bluestar said. “I think we’ve more than earned your good graces. It’s time for you to tell us what you know.”
“Fine by me.” The hag stretched and got to her feet. Firepaw noted with relief that her injured paw had healed up enough to put weight on it. “Mayhaps you’d like to speak privately.”
“That’s the plan.” Bluestar started for the camp entrance, where Redtail was waiting. He nodded respectfully to the hag as she ambled past him, to which she responded with a grunt, before following the two mollies outside.
Firepaw stood in the center of camp with the bird, having no idea what to do with himself now that he was bereft of his usual tasks. The adults in camp were talking with each other (most of them discussing what the hag might have to say), Ravenpaw had gone outside, and Greypaw was sleeping in. Firepaw considered going to talk with Goldenflower, but just as he turned her way, a loud purr made him look behind him.
It was Spottedleaf, coming up to him with shining eyes and a happily waving tail.
“You should be very excited,” she said to him cheerfully. “Tomorrow is a special day!”
Firepaw would have been delighted to be excited for anything, but he had no idea what she was talking about. Spottedleaf knew he was confused, clearly, because she continued.
“You, Ravenpaw, and Greypaw are coming with me tomorrow,” she elaborated. “We’re going on a journey to the Mother, all the way across the territories.”
“Wait, really?” Firepaw fully turned around, eyes wide. “I’ll actually see her?”
“You will!” Spottedleaf’s eyes were nearly shut with delight. “You’ll even see her heart, and if we’re lucky, all of us will receive a dream from her.”
“Already?”
Firepaw and Spottedleaf looked up and saw Ravenpaw approaching. He seemed just as surprised as Firepaw was. Spottedleaf nodded to him.
“You three ought to get as much rest as possible,” she said. “We’re leaving at daylight. Don’t worry, you’re off your apprentice duties for tonight. Just relax and eat, then sleep early.”
Ravenpaw let out a shaky sigh. “Yes, ma’am. Here, Firepaw, we can get some prey. Er— do you want to?”
“Sure.” Firepaw picked up the bird and trotted with Ravenpaw to the prey-pile. He decided to switch the bird out for a somewhat small rat, while Ravenpaw picked up a pigeon. They took a squirrel with them for Greypaw and went to their usual spot by the apprentices’ den. As they ate, Firepaw mused on how big the den seemed inside without Dustpelt and Sandstorm to share it with.
His musings faded off when Greypaw shifted the leaves and pushed through them out of the den, blinking sleepily. Ravenpaw made a small mew to get his attention and motioned to the squirrel. Greypaw yawned, nodded, and plopped down with a thud beside Ravenpaw, munching on a haunch with his eyes almost completely closed.
“We’re going to the Mother at daylight,” Firepaw informed him.
“Oh?” Greypaw swallowed, yawned, then jerked his head up, suddenly awake. “Oh! Awesome. Already?”
“That’s what I said.” Ravenpaw parted some feathers to get at his pigeon’s belly. “We have the night off to rest.”
“Man, that’ll be a long walk,” Greypaw said. “But we’ll get to see the other territories, so that’s not so bad. And the Mother, of course.” His eyes brightened. “The creator herself… can you imagine how intense it’ll be to walk through her body?”
“We what?” Firepaw squinted at him.
Greypaw gave Firepaw an amused look. “That’s how we get to her heart. What did you think we were going to do?”
“I don’t have any idea of anything,” Firepaw said. “I don’t even know which way we’re going.”
“You’ll see.” Greypaw flicked a paw. “Don’t worry, it’ll be cool. You’ll love it.”
It seemed like hardly half the night had passed before Firepaw and his friends were sent to sleep early. It also seemed like Firepaw had barely shut his eyes when Spottedleaf woke him up. Once again, he was too sleepy to argue with her, so he stumbled out of his nest and followed her, Ravenpaw, and Greypaw out of camp. He thought he vaguely heard some cats wishing them luck, but couldn’t grasp the words.
It was sunny out, even with patches of clouds dotting the sky. Light filtered through the trees and dappled the ground, making the cats’ pelts shine as they passed through more clear parts of the woods. Dew sparkled from every leaf and flower and blade of grass. It was all very pretty, and entirely too bright. Firepaw’s eyes were nearly squeezed shut as he walked along after his friends and the seer, which did not help his tiredness. Combined with the warmth of daylight, Firepaw was certain he was going to fall on his face and sleep again at any second.
He was grateful that no one was really speaking. He wasn’t confident in his ability to keep up a conversation.
With his mind afloat in drowsiness, Firepaw was caught off-guard by the edge of the forest into the open grasslands. He winced at the searing light and stopped in place, swiping at his eyes with a paw.
“Are you alright?” Ravenpaw asked, the first to speak this entire time.
Firepaw shook his head and forced his eyes open, gradually hating it less as each heartbeat passed. “Yeah. Yeah. I’m fine. Just… bright, is all.”
To his relief, when he looked up, he saw that he wasn’t the only one that was tired. Ravenpaw and Greypaw’s tails were low and their eyes were just as bleary as his. Spottedleaf seemed to be the only one truly awake, but she had kindly paused in her walking.
“Take a moment, boys,” she said. “Shake your pelts and feel the sunlight. It won’t do to fall asleep on our way.”
The apprentices were more than happy to obey. Firepaw did as she said and shook his fur out—and, to his surprise, it helped wake him up quite a bit. His eyes finally adjusted to the light and he scanned his surroundings to get an idea of how far they had walked.
They had made it out of the forest; the clearing of Fourtrees was visible in the distance, its boulder dully glowing in the center of the square of trees. The sloping, peaty hills of WindClan territory rose ahead of them, with shimmering ripples washing over the heath and heather. Firepaw still couldn’t see any cats there, but he was certain there had to be at least one. Perhaps, he thought a little hopefully, someone was out there, and he’d get to say hi to them.
Spottedleaf raised a paw and pointed it towards WindClan’s moors. “We’ll be going along the edge of the border that way. After that, we can stop at the Barn and rest.”
“Barn?” Firepaw asked.
“Like a house, but for…” Spottedleaf’s eyes glanced upwards as she thought. “Well, cats can live there instead. There’s a lot more mice.”
“So we can eat when we get there?” Greypaw sounded hopeful.
Spottedleaf nodded. “The loner there is very gracious with warriors. He’s used to seeing us go in all the time. Now, are we all ready to continue?”
The toms made various (still rather sleepy) sounds of affirmation, so Spottedleaf started off at a trot. They hurried after her with a yawn or two.
“A house for cats…” Firepaw said aloud, mostly to keep himself awake. “I wonder if it’ll look like the inside of a human house.”
“It’ll have more prey, at least,” Greypaw said. “And not fake ones, like that whatever-it-was you were talking about.”
Spottedleaf turned her head and tilted it curiously.
“Oh, I told these guys about this slab my old owner had,” Firepaw said to her. “It would show things on it.”
“Like reflections in the water,” Ravenpaw added.
Spottedleaf’s ear turned a little to the side. “It wasn’t, perchance, visions from ancestors, was it?”
“Nah.” Firepaw shook his head. “Just images. They were fake.”
Spottedleaf blinked. Then she huffed a breath. “I suppose nothing humans do makes much sense. Their houses, their cars, all such mysteries.”
“Cars aren’t too mysterious,” Firepaw said. “Once you’ve been in them and moved around, they’re not much to talk about.”
The other cats stopped in their tracks and turned fully to him, eyes bulging.
Firepaw looked between them nervously. “What?”
“You’ve been in a car?” Greypaw asked slowly.
“I mean…” Firepaw tilted his head a little, considering how to describe the concept. “Every house cat has. You have to go to the vet once in a while, or you get adopted into a new house. My old owner had one, and, well, I didn’t know how it worked, but I know what it’s like inside one.”
He paused, mostly to hold back a snort at how even Spottedleaf was staring at him in amazement.
“Don’t leave it there!” Greypaw lifted a paw and stomped it on the ground. “Tell us! What’s it like?”
“Oh, well…” Firepaw rolled a shoulder. “It’s pretty small, and the floor is made of stuff that kind of feels like moss. Then it has chairs—like stumps, for sitting on—and those are really smooth and slippery. And it’s got windows made of glass, that see-through stone, and you can lift your head up and watch the world go by. It’s kind of scary at first, but you get used to it.”
He left it there, because any further information he had would reveal that he had wailed like a newborn the entire first ride, and the next he had been in a panic trying to escape through the windows. He didn’t need to add that; he’d probably lose some of the awe the Clanborn cats were gawking at him with.
“It didn’t hurt you at all?” Spottedleaf asked.
“No, it’s just uncomfortable.” Firepaw took a step forward, trying to hint that they should keep moving. “It’s noisy and it shakes a little the whole ride.”
Spottedleaf took the hint and started walking again. The apprentices trotted along, though all of them kept darting looks at Firepaw. He decided to add on a little bit for flavor.
“I mean, in certain areas it shakes less,” he said. “It depends on how fast the car’s going. Where I lived, they all stayed slow. Which was lucky, since there were other cats living there.”
Ravenpaw tilted his head, observing Firepaw. “I’ve never really heard you talk about the other kittypets. Didn’t you have friends?”
“I had one,” Firepaw replied. His heart went a little heavy as he thought of Smudge. “But, you know, I’m not allowed to talk with him again. I don’t think the others would miss me, anyway.”
“It sounds like you don’t really miss them, to me,” Ravenpaw said. “I mean, you don’t seem to miss kittypet life in general.”
Firepaw blinked as he considered this. “You’re right, actually. I thought I’d miss it, but I’ve hardly even thought about it since I came to ThunderClan. It’s a lot better out here. Just— you know, like... it’s colder, sure, but I feel more alive out here. Really awake. You’re always half-asleep when you’re a kittypet.” He lowered his head a little, suddenly self-conscious. “I don’t know if that makes sense, but that’s just how it feels.”
Spottedleaf looked at him approvingly. “It does make sense. You were wise to come live with us. This is certainly where you belong.”
Firepaw relaxed and raised his head again. “I’ve never wanted to go back, honestly. I’ve been missing way too much in the world.”
“And you’ve got a lot more to see,” Greypaw said. “So keep sticking around.”
Firepaw purred a little. “Will do.”
Silence fell over the party again, but it was one of silent contemplation rather than exhaustion. Firepaw watched the landscape as they trotted through it, adoring the breeze bending the grass and heather around him and carrying distant, strange scents to his maw. The sun itself was a luxury, warming him to the core and drying the peat enough that he wasn’t stepping in mud. The beauty of the wild surrounded him.
It couldn’t get any better than this.
Spottedleaf led the apprentices towards the moor of WindClan, only pausing once to warn them to stick close to her before continuing on. They were close enough to the road for its rank to reach them, but they were still on the grassy slope a good distance above it.
“Will we be in trouble if they see us?” Ravenpaw asked anxiously. “Shouldn’t we stay down there?”
“Oh, don’t worry, chrii,” Spottedleaf soothed. “We’re on our journey to the Mother, and you’re with me. We can go wherever we like.”
The wind picked up, bringing with it the earthy scent of WindClan. Spottedleaf stopped and lifted her tail to get the apprentices to do the same, which they did. Firepaw looked around, searching for whatever she’d noticed, but couldn’t see anything until the shrubs close to him shifted. He jumped in surprise as a group of toms pushed through—all tall and lean.
Spottedleaf blinked and turned to face them, bowing her head respectfully. “Well! I didn’t expect to see you today, Rookstar.”
The angular black-and-white tom didn’t say anything at first. His eyes slowly roamed over her and the young toms, slightly narrowed. Firepaw caught sight of Wrenpaw and waved his tail, a little nervous until Wrenpaw calmly waved back.
“Hello again, Spottedleaf,” the last tom said. He was grey and faintly striped, with one ear ruggedly split down the middle. Firepaw’s own ear twitched as a phantom pain mirrored the WindClan cat’s injury. “Mother?”
Spottedleaf nodded. “I didn’t want to risk walking by the road. I hope that’s alright.”
“Seer business,” said Rookstar quietly. “Go where you like. Would you prefer an escort?”
“Oh, no,” Spottedleaf said cheerfully. “We’ll be alright, as long as your friends aren’t around.”
“They aren’t.” Tornear’s chin lowered a little, but his eyes were trained on the tortoiseshell. “The badger’s gone.”
“Been gone for a while,” Wrenpaw added. His voice was just as flat as the older toms’. “We handled that.”
“Good!” Spottedleaf curled her tail. “Then, if it’s quite alright, we can go alone. We’re stopping at the Barn and hunting there.”
Rookstar gave her one slow nod. He looked over the apprentices again and his gaze lingered on Firepaw for a moment. Firepaw met his eyes and tried to make his blink as friendly as possible. Rookstar looked away and at his followers.
“Deadfoot’s patrol should be done in the east by now,” he said. He added to Spottedleaf, “You’re free to roam.”
“Thank you, prra.” Spottedleaf bowed her front half and gestured to the apprentices. “Let’s not scare their prey. Come along!”
Greypaw hurried after her, almost nervous, and the WindClan cats turned and started to walk away. Firepaw made a few steps before noticing silence behind him. He looked back—Ravenpaw was staring after the WindClanners. Firepaw couldn’t see his face, but he seemed quite focused.
“Ravenpaw?” he asked.
Ravenpaw jolted, shook his head and almost ran after Firepaw. “Sorry, sorry.”
Firepaw waited for him to catch up to him before asking in a low voice, “What’s up?”
“Nothing,” Ravenpaw said, almost before Firepaw had finished talking. “Just thinking. That’s all.”
Firepaw tilted his head, but he didn’t push. Ravenpaw looked very embarrassed, and he picked up his pace, overtaking his friend. Firepaw decided to let it go and followed along, glancing back one last time at where the leader and his crew had walked away.
To his great surprise, they were completely gone. Not one blade of grass rustled or bent, no scent anymore, nothing.
Curious.
Bluestar was right. They were quite stealthy after all.
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college bf!bin
a/n the duality of this man??? i’m deceased...anyway i did not think this would go this long but uh my hand slipped...happy birthday binnie!
word count: 5k
genre: fluff, smut, (tiny) angst _________________________________________________
ugh yo
bin is so??? infuriatingly hot??? yet cute at the same time
major: exercise science
and because I love mermaid prince/the beginning, he’s been on the swim team since first year college
swam varsity starting his second year
besties with eunwoo, they were roommates their whole college career
alright so bin loves making friends
he’s so playful and talkative once you really get to know him
but his aura?? tbh very intimidating
like he has an rbf and just like he’s so tall, broad shouldered, built, like he just carries himself very strongly that you will get intimidated when you first meet him
very well known in the university
literally has a professional photographed banner of him hanging in the athletic building with the gold medal he won freshman year
a little embarrassed about it
not really, only when the boys (as in literally the other five) tease him
myungjun: woOoOw bin that guy on the banner really looks like you, don’t you think?
rocky: we geeeeet it you’re a star athlete
blah blah blah you know the vibes, they’re endearing
so how do you meet bin?
basically you’re a friend of a friend—you’re eunbi’s (sinb) friend
you’ve only met bin briefly from time to time, but otherwise you never really had any reason to get acquainted with him
your only encounters of him are when he wants to annoy eunbi and she immediately puts him in his place
but then suddenly in the spring semester of your 2nd year, you and him are in the same 8 am
a boring statistics gen ed class that everyone needs to take in order to graduate
you were running a bit late during the first class meeting—you woke up 30 minutes after your alarm and literally rushed out of your apartment—you made it to class with 2 minutes to spare
most of the seats were filled up already, except that one seat in the back left corner by the window next to the one and only moon bin
oh would you look at that
you felt a bit relieved honestly, you didn’t know anyone else in that class so at least you saw a semi-familiar face
he grinned at you when you sat down
“hey y/n”
you were a bit taken back, “you know my name?”
he laughed a little, “yeah of course, you’re one of eunbi’s really good friends, why wouldn’t I know your name?”
before you could respond, the professor started class and ceased your conversation
one thing you realized as the weeks start to go on
you and bin could not give any two fucks about statistics
no offense to stats lovers
every 8 am on mon/wed/fri, neither one of you would pay attention in class
you both enabled each other to not pay attention basically
so when the professor announced the content and date for the first exam
you and bin literally looked at each other with the same expression
you were both fucked
after class was dismissed, instead of the two of you quickly packing your things and fleeing the room immediately, you both lagged a little bit
you: so...do you know anything that’s going to be on the exam?
bin: uh...no? y/n you’re literally right next to me, you know I don’t do jack shit in this class
you: well fuck, how are you gonna study then bin?
bin: I was probably gonna ask my roommate to help me, he passed with a 96 when he took this class
you give him the best puppy dog eyes you could muster up, you lean in and clasp your hands together like you’re praying
“can he help me too...? please?”
bin’s eyes go a lil wide bc you were a bit closer than he was used to and shit was his heart racing rn?
bin: uh...yeah...sure, i’ll text you to come over when we’re gonna study
you beam at him and like in your excitement you give him a hug
“thank you thank you thank you! i literally cannot fail this class. I’ll see you on friday bin!”
with that you grabbed your bag and just left, leaving bin shocked
he’s surprisingly a shy boy okay!
he always thought you were cute from when he first saw you hanging out with eunbi, but ofc he never thought any more of it
until you guys had this class together and he started to think every day, that wow you are really cute
bin texts you the next day
coincidentally, eunbi texts you too
bin: hey this is bin, if you’re free in an hour my roommate’s gonna help me go over the material in ch. 1
eunbi: why did bin ask for your number
you to bin: yes! send me your addy and i’ll be there :)
you to eunbi: we’re in the same stats class lol and we’re gonna study for our exam next week
eunbi: lol moon bin studying? you might wanna bring some wine with you for emergency y/n
you: lol what do you mean by that?
eunbi: binnie hates studying, but good luck!
ahh, eunbi becomes unhinged when it comes to bin
but you know it’s bc they’re that close, they’re literally childhood best friends, more so like siblings
still, studying w him couldn’t be that bad right?
spoiler alert, it went alright
you felt bad showing up to bin’s apartment empty handed so you picked up some coffee before you arrived
you officially meet bin’s roommate, eunwoo, and you’re floored for like 2 minutes bc literally how can a man like him be real?
cue bin being a bit jealous bc yeah he knew his roommate’s perfect but like damn did you have to be affected by him too :(
eunwoo’s a good teacher alright? you actually understood the material from him
you: idk what eunbi’s talking about, you’re actually not that bad at studying bin
bin being offended: oh god what did eunbi say about me
eunwoo smirking: maybe it’s because you’re here y/n, bin usually doesn’t focus this much when it’s just me trying to help him
you: ???
bin in his head: i can’t trust anyone huh
before you left his place, you and bin planned to meet up and study one more time before your stats exam
it was just you and bin this time
although you’d never admit it, yes you tried to look good for meeting up with him
yeah he’s a friend?? at least you think you were at that level?? but still, he’s a cute friend and you really didn’t want him to see you looking crusty
you and bin end up studying for a whole 5 hours
granted, half of that time you two were messing around, eating food, trying to procrastinate for as long as you could
bc even though you two had a good handle on the material now—thanks to eunwoo—you both still hated statistics
you knew bin started to get more comfortable with you bc he started teasing you
it made you happy hehe so ofc you started to quip back at him
not at the intensity that he and eunbi do but it’s enough for you :)
he walks you back to your apartment after your study session
wow what a gentleman
bin waving bye at your door with the cutest smile: see you in class y/n :)
mayhaps your stomach did a little somersault
anyways
on the day of your exam you were freaking out
you have test anxiety ah ha ha
you woke up at 5 bc you were paranoid about being late to class
you’re like hastily looking over the notes again when you get to class like are you really prepared omg you’re psyching yourself out hella
bin comes in with 2 cups of iced coffee and he’s like woah are you okay
you: i woke up at 5 bin, idk if i can do this omg
you are like visibly in distress rn and he feels like a pang in his chest
he was gonna mess with you and say like “bet im gonna get a higher grade than you” but he smartly decides against it
instead, he just takes your hand and gives it a little squeeze: y/n, take a deep breath. you’re going to do great, you studied your ass for this and we both know that you got this material down—even eunwoo hyung said you were gonna ace this exam. just trust your instincts, okay? breathe with me.
he was staring at you so intently and genuinely when trying to calm you down
your anxiety yeeted and suddenly you felt shy
you: th...thanks bin...
bin was worried about you while taking the test rip, he kept secretly glancing at you (while also trying not to make it look like he was cheating) just to make sure that you were okay
he walks you to your next class after you both finished your exam
bin: you sure you’re okay? you said you woke up at 5, did you even eat breakfast? let’s get food after your next class.
you were feeling better after the test but like you got so endeared at his fussing
yes you and bin got lunch that day
your exam results were uploaded the next day
you immediately called bin: I GOT A 95
bin: i told you that you would ace it! i got a 90 hehe
you: bin i literally owe you and eunwoo my life, lemme buy you guys food or something
you hear a little bit of bickering over the phone and suddenly you’re talking to eunwoo
eunwoo: i would love some sushi, but since bin can’t eat seafood, why don’t you come watch his swim meet this weekend :)
you: o...h...o-okay yeah i’d love to watch, what time is it? :)
eunwoo: it’s saturday at 10 am
you: okay! i’ll see you there bin
bin already planning on drop kicking eunwoo
cha eunwoo—best wingman™
you basically beg eunbi to go with you to bin’s swim meet
eunbi: i know bin can swim, why do i have to watch him flounder around under water
also eunbi: faster bin! don’t you fucking dare lose!
bin places first this meet
are we shocked? no
okay you mentally prepared yourself for seeing him shirtless, but clearly you didn’t prep enough bc you’re on the cusp of drooling when you’re watching him from the bleachers
and let’s face it, you’re not subtle and eunbi knows everything so she’s literally closing your jaw for you and like messing with you
eunbi: y/n, you’re really sure you like bin? he’s a good guy but c’mon, i think you deserve better
you: since when did i say that i like him ???? and what do you mean ??? i think he checks...all the boxes...for me...
eunbi: maybe it’s bc i’ve known him since when he used to wet his pants so i don’t understand why people are attracted to him, but like...really, you’ve been checking him out since he removed his shirt. even the ref can see that you’re simping over him
you and eunbi meet up with eunwoo and the rest of bin’s friends—that you haven’t met yet but know of
jinjin: oh so you’re the y/n that bin’s been talking about *wink wonk*
baby you’re blushing
even more so when bin comes up to your group
mmm middle parted wet hair, muscle tee and white sweats, towel around his shoulders
he’s so hot ???
you’re all congratulating him blah blah, but like bin keeps glancing at you and all you can do is just smile and like nervous laugh
sanha: y/n! eunbi noona! you should come eat with us to celebrate bin hyung’s win
eunbi glances at you, little smirk on her face: i have plans, but i know y/n’s free! bin you make sure they get home safe after y’alls dinner plans :)
hwang eunbi—best wingwoman™
dinner with the boys was chaotic, you were talking and joking around with them as if you didn’t just meet them today
*you about to get your wallet*
bin, not even able to look at you: it’s okay y/n, i got you this time
cue the boys teasing
astro: kings of making fun of each other
rocky as the group is splitting up: walk y/n home safely hyung :) don’t stay out too late
bin: sorry about them, they’re a bunch of loud idiots...ah haha...
the walk back to your apartment is actually pretty sweet
he didn’t know if you would actually come watch his meet or not but he was excited when he actually saw you
you talk about small random things about yourselves, but it’s not like useless information, you bet that both your subconsciouses are keeping track of whatever y’all are talking about
you give each other a “friendly” hug goodnight...that lasts like a minute or so
and while you’re hugging, bin just can’t help but think that wow you fit so perfectly in his arms
and on the other hand, you’re thinking he feels so warm? so safe? you don’t want to pull away?
but ofc the hug has to end and you’re thanking him for walking you home and he’s like glued to his spot waving goodbye sweetly and waiting for you to go inside so that he knows you’re safely in your apartment before leaving
bin sighing dreamily as he walks back to his and eunwoo’s place
eunwoo waiting on the couch with a glass of water: how was your date ;)
bin: it wasn’t a date, i just walked y/n home
eunwoo: yeah, but you want it to be a date
bin: ...shut up
god why is the pining stage so long
alright everyone knows you and bin like each other
it becomes pretty obvious after the swim meet
you and him fall into this little routine of switching who buys coffee for your 8 am
and then he’d walk you to your next class afterwards
you both still don’t pay attention in stats, sorry
but that means more outside study sessions dates
you come watch his swim meets, whether astro’s there or you’re just watching by yourself
and then you and him get lunch?? early dinner?? right afterwards, it depends on whenever his meet ends
but like??? neither of you have confessed your feelings for each other
even though you both have like a little hint that yeah the feelings are mutual
you and bin are literally like this for 3 months, like damn the semester is almost over
eunbi and eunwoo are tired of your shit, they’re both just like: when the fuck are they getting together? we’re sick of this.
alright so the masterminds literally pay one of eunwoo’s friends from his major to ask you out while you’re studying with bin
let’s do mingyu why not, he was in your korean history class last year
you and bin are in the library, half studying half goofing off per usual
eunwoo, eunbi, and mingyu are at the opposite side of the floor
mingyu: u sure bin won’t clock me for trying to ask out y/n
eunwoo: probably not??
eunbi: just do it please
mingyu giving them both the finger before walking up to your table
“hey y/n...i was wondering if you’d like to get dinner with me...as a date?”
you: o_o huh?
mingyu: i always thought you were cute from when we had class together last year, but i never had the balls to ask you out or anything...you’re not dating anyone, right?
you glance at bin to find that he’s already looking at you with an expression that you don’t really know how to read
you: um...well no I’m not-
bin: actually, we’re dating so y/n can’t go out with you mingyu, sorry.
mingyu’s not even phased, he just gives you a thumbs up and then leaves
you’re confused like literally what is going on—and then you process what bin said and you whip your head to look at him
bin: sorry i said that...i just felt...jealous i guess when mingyu asked you out
you: I wouldn’t have said yes anyway...I sorta like someone else
bin: fuck it, the topic already came up...y/n I’ve liked you for a while now but uh...I don’t know I guess I was scared to tell you because I’m scared of rejection
you just laugh, but not mockingly! more like bin you’re so cute wtf
“bin, why would I reject you when I’ve literally been into you for the past four months?”
it’s safe to say that you and bin officially began dating after that
eunwoo texting in their gc: bin and y/n are finally together
myungjun: fucking finally
bin: how...did u know that eunwoo...?
*eunwoo has left the chat*
alright but bin’s charm?? flirting?? teasing?? sweetness?? up 1000%
bin is touchy y’all, in private his hands are always on you, whether it be sexual or not sexual is up to you
he restrains himself in public ofc, the most he does is put a hand on your waist or hold your hand
eunbi threatens bin early on in your relationship: bin you’re like my brother, but y/n’s one of my dearest friends and if you as much make them cry i will kill you
ofc bin is still eunbi’s punching bag, but when you three are hanging out, he’s dramatic and acts like he’s hurt so he’s like whining to you
sometimes you play along and coo at him like: aww binnie, where does it hurt baby?
other times you’re like: you really think i believe that?? with the size of your biceps??
eunbi: excuse me while i vomit
okay but binnie? bestest sweetest boy
yes he looks all big and intimidating
but he’s soft—especially for you
your nicknames for each other are either “bub” or “baby”
yes will join in making fun of you with the boys, but when you start pouting he’s a goner and will defend you
bin is also a big cuddler, but i mean you’re not complaining hehe
he’s the big spoon, no questions asked
okay but being in bin’s arms is like your favorite place in the world
his frame literally just envelopes you and all you can feel and smell is him and it’s so??? content, you feel at home with him
you feel bad in the morning bc like his arm has to be sore from your weight so you try to like get out of his grasp, but he literally just whines and hugs you tighter
okay but just imagine you and bin napping and his arms are around your waist, his nose is buried in your neck and he wakes up like nuzzling his face in your shoulder like a puppy
im soft
one week you’re staying over at bin’s apartment and then the next week he’s staying over at yours, the cycle goes like that
if you’re one of my ladies with a ~vagíne~, he will buy all your cravings and your tampons/pads, literally anything you want that week, it is yours
doesn’t really get jealous now that you two are official, he knows that you’re his and he’s yours
you two lightly bicker like friends, but you’ve never had a terrible fight before
you were really close to though—or...like you did?? but it was resolved really quick
one of the only problems of bin is that he hates showing weakness and it takes him a whole lot to truly fully 100% be vulnerable with someone even if it’s someone close to him
he pulled a muscle in his arm and it cost him one of his swim meets
he had to go to rehab for like a month and you knew that mentally he’s been off bc of it
you try to ease talking him into telling you about how he’s really feeling but he just kept dodging the subject
one night after one of his rehab sessions, he came back to your place and you’re just like
“hey bubbie, how was rehab? how are you doing?”
and he just snaps at you: stop asking me how I am, y/n, it’s getting really annoying
you’re taken aback, like what the fuck where did that come from?
your eyebrows furrow and you cross your arms bc you are not going to get spoken to like that
“so me worrying about you and wondering how your recovery’s going is annoying? that’s what a partner is supposed to do, moon bin. what’s going on with you?”
bin: you’re being suffocating! it’s the only thing you ask me about nowadays, sometimes I—
oh boy you got mad
you: I ask you because I know you’re not telling me things! I know you’re suffering by yourself and I want to let you know that I’m here for you, I want to help take some of the pain away or at least help you deal with it because I’m your partner! but how can I if you can’t even let me in?? we’re fucking dating moon bin, we’re supposed to go through rough times together. and you call me suffocating...?
bin’s silent and he’s looking at the floor
you sigh, tears are building in your eyes because you’re frustrated and a bit hurt by what he said, and your voice cracks when you speak again: if i’m suffocating you, then you should leave. text me or something when you can breathe again, I don’t know.
there’s a bit of spite in your words, hidden by the pain
bin sees the tears rolling down your cheeks and that’s when he knows he fucked up
he’s never seen you cry before—besides like from a sad movie or something
so like the fact that he made you cry and hurt you with his words? damn he hates himself rn
he immediately wraps his arms around you, and you like try to push him to get away bc why is he hugging you? didn’t he just say that you were suffocating? why is he confusing
bin: baby, I’m sorry...I shouldn’t have taken out my frustrations on you, you’re not suffocating me I promise...you’re right about everything, I should be sharing things with you and telling you how I’m really feeling...I’m sorry.
you don’t say anything and just like sniffle and he picks you up and brings you to your bedroom and then he just lets it all out
he tells you how rehab is hard and like yeah his muscle pain is going away, but he doesn’t know if he can swim as fast as he used to and that scares him
and he tells you that sometimes he’s thought of giving up swimming since his injury, but then he thinks of you and that’s how he’s still going through with rehab
you’re his motivator and comfort but he doesn’t want to show you his weak side bc he hates that part of himself
and at this point, bin starts tearing up and you’re like stroking his hair to try and comfort him
bin: I’m not good at telling my feelings baby...probably why I didn’t tell you I liked you until 4 months later...but I promise I’ll work harder and at least try and tell them to you.
ugh pain
anyway your communication with serious things got better after that encounter
eunbi finding out that you and bin argued and he made you cry and she literally punched his stomach
you: omg eunbi stop
bin: it’s okay...I sorta deserved that
eunbi: why...are you not swearing at me? shit, bin are you okay?
he nods to the girl and just puts an arm around your shoulder: we talked things through, don’t worry. I’m all good now, but I did deserve that punch because I hurt y/n when I promised you I wouldn’t
bin ends up having a full recovery and bam his first swim meet after he got the clear from the PT, he gets first place again
all the boys and you and eunbi were there supporting him
bin was hella nervous before the meet started, but you gave him a little good luck kiss and was like: I believe in you bub, no matter the result, as long as you give it your all and don’t hurt yourself again, you’ll be the winner to me :)
this was actually when the first “i love you” was said
after your little pep talk in the locker room, bin’s just hugging you and holding you for comfort
and he just went out with it
“I love you y/n”
you blush hella hard bc you were not expecting that
obviously you’ve been feeling it like yeah your feelings for bin have grown into love for a while now
you just bury your face in his chest and hug him tighter
“I love you too binnie, now go get em bub.”
he smiles and kisses you and tells you that he’ll see you after the meet is over
you come back to the crowd where the boys and eunbi are and you just have a huge smile on your face, you’re literally glowing
myungjun: please tell me you guys didn’t fuck before his swim meet
speaking of fucking
okay let’s get down and dirty ladies and gents wink wonk mmm grr bark bark
bin is so sexy y’all like i dont need to tell you that
he’s 100% a tease
you have a little muscle kink hehe
which bin very much uses to his advantage
if bin is wearing a sleeveless shirt, you bet he wants to smash that day
will walk around shirtless after a shower or after a workout just to turn you on and then depending on his mood, he might tease you for like an hour or you’ll just get right to it
he’s very proud of his body and the work he put into it and knowing that you get turned on from one look of it?? gives him an ego boost, he loves it
one time at a party, he wore a crop top (mm hello bad idea bin) and you literally went feral
you dragged him inside the nearest bathroom and just started making out
he’s an ass guy
...all of astro are ass guys, it’s just obvious with how much they slap each other’s asses and poke each other’s assholes
okay you know how he’s touchy right? i mentioned that earlier
he always wants you on his lap
even if there’s a space available, nope your seat is his thighs
ofc when the situation allows, like you’re not gonna sit on his lap in class duh
most of the time in public like if you’re hanging out with the boys or something, it’s innocent
but if he wants to be a tease, he’ll literally just tighten his grip on your hips and grind you down onto his cock
subtle, he won’t straight up thrust into you
just enough to get his dick stirring and make you feel the outline of it through your pants
and then he just stops and hugs your waist again?? wtf
his major’s exercise science right? will ask if he can practice on you for anatomy and physiology, but you know after touching you in a couple places, y’all will just end up fucking
likes to bite and mark
very proud seeing the hickeys he leaves on you
you can bite, but you can’t bruise, idk his upper body is exposed a lot bc swimming so you can’t really leave any marks on him unless it’s the off season
foreplay’s cool, but he prefers the main event, he just wants to be in you
as much as he loves doggy, his fav position is the hook
(it’s when your legs are on his shoulders ohoho and it just lets him fuck you in a deeper angle mmm)
also in the hook, he can choke you
if i have a choking kink, you have a choking kink
okay little tangent, choking is so hot?
like just imagine you and bin are making out, he pushed you against the wall, literally grinding his hips into you, and his hand just comes up and squeezes your throat? that’s so sexy
likes butt stuff oops
i don’t make the rules, he just does
daddy kink, but no power play
will not degrade you (even if you really just want him to call you his dirty slut) bc he really values seeing you as equals
seeing your face when you cum is a must
almost always: you cumming → bin cumming
nothing gets him off more than knowing that he’s making you feel good
after !! care !!
sweetest boy!!
will clean you up with a warm towel after sex
and if you’re one of my ladies, he will always remind you to pee so that you don’t get a UTI
if y’all had a marathon or something, he will draw a bath and carry you to the bathroom and you will bathe together, so soft
always ends sex with an i love you :’)
okay let’s get back to the soft stuff
special thing about swimmer bin: pool dates
sometimes when he’s practicing and it’s just him, he asks you to come to the aquatic center and you two end up splashing around and being cute together
he like knew that you were the one for him some time during senior year
it was the holidays and his parents invited you to spend christmas with their family since your parents were out of the country this break
his parents and sister liked you immediately—which you were so scared about, but bin just knew
you woke up early christmas eve (and bin was out like a rock) so you just went downstairs to brew some coffee or something and you saw that his mom was already starting on making food
naturally, you offered your help and she was like no, you’re a guest y/n, but obviously you started helping
bin comes downstairs like an hour or two later to see you, his mom, and his dad just cooking and listening to christmas music and talking and his heart just like swells??
you: morning binnie :)
his mom: how can you be sleeping when y/n’s here helping us with christmas dinner
his dad: what kind of boyfriend are you, son?
just kidding all jokes
but that’s the moment when he knew
best boyfriend bin ugh
he becomes a legend in the school for swimming
but doesn’t continue after college, he’s all about becoming a physical trainer after graduation
he goes to grad school, while you’re out working in business
bin moves in with you after graduating, it was the obvious next step
you do talk about the future together, but obviously bin’s still in school and you’re both fresh from undergrad so there’s no rush yet to tie the knot
doesn’t stop his or your parents from talking to you two about marriage tho oops
ugh but the domesticity after bin moves in with you? superb
like yeah obviously you both basically lived together anyway when he still roomed with eunwoo just from how much you and him spent at each other’s places
but like your apartment is now both of your place and it’s like your home is finally complete
your apartment becomes the reunion place for the boys and eunbi
at this point everyone knew you and bin were gonna get married eventually
eunwoo and eunbi: we did that ;)
and that’s how you and your college bf!bin live happily ever after uwu
happy birthday binnie moonbob ♥
1-25-21
#im in love with bin ????#like one second i think eunwoo is my bias and then i see bin and suddenly im questioning my life?#happy birthday binnie moonbob!#it's the first astro birthday im celebrating as an aroha :')#i was literally in my nursing zoom class and i got the notif on vlive that bin went on#i never clicked a button so fast#moonbin#moon bin#bin#astro bin#astro moonbin#binnie moonbob#astro#astro au#astro headcanons#astro fluff#astro smut#astro scenarios#astro scenario#astro fic#moonbin au#moonbin fluff#moonbin smut#moonbin scenarios#moon bin au#moon bin fluff#moon bin smut#moon bin scenarios#bin au#bin fluff
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Shake, Rattle and Roll 2
Chapter two!
You can find chapter one Here
Summary: Now you’ve got a dead body and a bunch of prospectors. Time to get out of this mess.
Warnings: More murder. Swearing.
Eventual Ezra x reader.
Tags: @fandom-blackhole @pedrocentric
--
“So who killed him?” Felicia demanded, irreverently.
You scoffed quietly and shifted around the others, making your way to the teenager. She was still staring at the body, barely moving. “Hey, kid,” you murmured, moving into her line of sight. “Let’s go get you a drink, hm? C’mon.”
Gently, you herded the girl away from the body and into another room. She sank into a chair, and you crouched in front of her.
“What’s your name, kiddo?” you asked her quietly.
“Not a kid,” she murmured, although it sounded more reflexive than argumentative.
“You’re not old enough to legally drink,” you retorted. “So you’re still a kid. And I’ll call you that until I have something else to call you.”
She hesitated, blinking at you. Her eyes were wide but surprisingly dry. “Cee.”
“Cee.” You smiled at her and gave her your name in return. Her voice was quiet as she repeated it, but not shocky. She was still tracking things. “Cee, I’m sorry, I have to ask. Was that your dad?”
“Yes.” She took a deeper breath, gaze flicking back to the doorway.
“Okay.” You rocked back on your heels. “You have anyone else?”
“No.” She seemed reluctant to answer you. You couldn’t blame her - the state-run facilities were kind of rubbish.
“Okay.” You took a deep breath. One problem at a time. “Okay. First we need to call this in to the authorities, so they can do all their… stuff.” You waved a hand, unwilling to go into further detail about what ‘stuff’ meant. Investigating, mostly. “You’re probably old enough that you could file for emancipation, and if this place is your dad’s, that’s good for you.”
“What?” Cee blinked at you, looking taken aback.
“I mean, unless you really want to go to a government-funded orphanage? I wouldn’t recommend it. They’re not great.” You wrinkled your nose in distaste.
The two of you were interrupted by a knock on the door. “I had a feeling I might find the two of you together,” Ezra drawled from the doorway, gaze flickering between the two of you. “I have some unfortunate news.”
“More?” you asked, voice dry.
“The others have decided that the map Damon spoke of must be here,” Ezra continued, looking more at Cee than at you. “They are quite determined to find it, and to not be interrupted in their search.”
Meaning they weren’t calling the authorities, and would hinder anyone who did. That was not great. “Where are they starting?”
“The study, I believe. They left the cook in the kitchen with some… creative promises.”
Aka: threats. Got it. “Did they say anything about the kid?”
“No.” Ezra shook his head, looking at you. “I do not believe they cottoned on to the relation between her and Damon.”
“Thank Kevva for small favors,” you grumbled. “Okay. New plan. We’re getting you out of the house.”
“What?” Cee asked, looking at you.
“We are?” Ezra asked, his voice dangerously mellow.
“Yes, we are,” you said, glowering at Ezra. “I don’t give a fuck about the supposed Queen’s Lair. They can turn the house over searching for that map. But once they realize that she’s related, they’re going to expect her to have answers. You really want to leave a kid to the mercy of the four of them?”
Ezra was silent, frowning a little as his gaze bored into yours. You stared right back, refusing to blink, willing him to just listen to you. You were speaking reasonably, after all.
Apparently, the girl had been thinking, too. “This place isn’t dad’s, not really,” she whispered. “We’re using it tonight. He was almost out of money, that’s why he was so eager to get some diggers for the Queen’s Lair.”
You dropped your head forward, towards your chest, with a sigh. Fuck. Fuck! Your mind scrambled over possibilities, creating plans to discard them almost as fast.
“Do you know where the map is?” Ezra asked, creeping a few steps closer.
Cee looked between Ezra and you, calculating. For all that she wasn’t grown yet, she wasn’t a fool, either. She was weighing her own options.
“Cee,” you murmured, lifting your head to meet her gaze again. “What are you thinking?”
Cee didn’t get a chance to respond. There was a crash from down the hall, then footsteps running down the hall towards the kitchen. A brief moment of silence later, there was the sharp report of a thrower discharging. You closed your eyes slowly. The cook, at a guess.
“You two stay here,” Ezra said, speaking a little more quickly now. “I will venture over and see what has occurred.”
You blew out a breath and stood, stretching out your complaining knees. This was turning into a right mess. Even worse, a right mess with no backup.
Okay. Priorities, in order:
Get Cee out. Get yourself out. Call the authorities. Then see about hiring Cee or something to help her along. Sure, you’d only known the kid for a couple hours, but no kid deserved this.
Of course, convincing Cee to let you help her might not be so easy, after all.
“Cee,” you murmured, turning to the girl again. “I want to make one thing clear right now, between you and me. I don’t care about the map, or the aurelac.”
She blinked at you. “You… don’t?”
“No. I stopped digging years ago and I have no desire to go back to it.” You took a deep breath. “Just… keep that in mind. I have a feeling it’s going to be a long night.”
Ezra let himself back into the room. This time, he strode right over to the two of you, standing with his hands tucked into his pockets. “Well, from what I understand, the cook attempted to call the authorities, to report the, er, incident, as it were. One of the others took exception to that and stopped her in a rather permanent fashion.”
“Great.” You shoved one hand back through your hair in frustration. “Any idea if they’re continuing to search room to room?”
"Your guess is as good as mine, birdie," Ezra admitted with a shrug.
You huffed. "Alright, kid, you got a way out of here? Back door?"
"I can make it," Cee agreed.
"Might be needin' a distraction," Ezra mused, gaze sharp.
You snorted. "That would help. You volunteering?"
"No. We are." Ezra shot you a grin, wild and mischievous. Oh this one was absolutely Trouble.
"Hey!"
The sharp bark from one of the others made you and Cee jump.
"Everyone here, now!"
Ezra nodded for you to go first, but you turned to Cee.
"I know this isn't exactly ideal, but I need you to trust me when I say I will do whatever I can to get you out of here. Okay?" You spoke in a rushed whisper, maintaining eye contact with the girl. This was important.
"Why?" She asked, rightfully confused.
"I'll explain later, I don't have time right now," you muttered. "But I need you to know that." You stood and headed for the door, passing Ezra wordlessly and ignoring his appraising stare.
The other prospectors were already gathered in the main hall, joined momentarily by yourself, Ezra, and Cee.
"Grab the girl," Mikken growled. Inumon stepped forward to comply, and you stepped in her way, heart hammering.
"What for?" You asked, suspicious.
"She's a liability." Mikken gave you a look that clearly questioned your sanity.
"She's a kid," you protested. "She doesn't know anything about the map. She just works here."
"Indeed, we spent the past several minutes conversing with this young soul," Ezra added. "As disappointing as it is, she knows nothing of the map, nor of Damon's plans. I am afraid if we wish to find the map, we will have to do so ourselves."
"Fine," Fero spat. "Then we split up and search the house."
Uneasy silence followed that statement as everyone eyed each other, wary and mistrustful.
"Well then," Ezra started with an easy smile. "Mayhaps we pair off with our accustomed partners? We can divvy up the house by floor."
Mikken nodded once and pointed at you and Ezra. "Basement." Then he looked at Fero and Felicia. "Second floor."
"And the girl?" Inumon asked before anyone (mainly you) could protest.
Mikken looked down the hallway, thinking for a few moments, before he nodded to a doorway. "Lock her in there."
You turned to Cee and found Ezra already there, smile still firmly in place.
"Well little bird, looks like you're in luck," he said, leading the way into the room. It was a library. An actual library. You felt your jaw drop a bit. You'd thought the study had been impressive, but this? This was magnificent. Ezra whistled lowly, apparently sharing your opinion. "In luck indeed! Little bird, you most certainly have luck on your side this fine night. I recommend you find something with which to entertain yourself and keep quiet."
Cee gave both of you one last look before she stepped inside. Ezra shut and locked the door, pocketing the key.
"Shall we venture forth, then?" He asked, nodding to the basement door.
A quick glance confirmed Fero and Felicia were already half-way up the stairs. With a sigh, you nodded.
"Let's go."
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Rating Every Song on Fearless Based on How Gay it is
Hello friends! I still have a few song analyses in the pipeline (and one on Lover the album) but today in honor of Fearless (Taylor’s Edition) being announced and Love Story being released in a few hours I thought I’d do something fun to celebrate!
And you know what? Fuck my usual disclaimer, I am the word of god here. Try and change my mind about any of these. I dare you. (I kid I kid this isn’t that serious and you’re free to disagree <3)
1. Fearless 15/10
Everything about this song is so fucking gay oh my god. This isn’t a fruit, this is a whole ass edible arrangement. As a small rural town Gay (my hometown has a population of less that 4,000 and where I’m living now has a population of 2,500) this uh. Hits.
“And I don't know how it gets better than this/You take my hand and drag me head first, fearless”
Y’ALL
The idea of falling in love with someone who makes you less afraid of your homophobic small town…….it’s getting to me.
“My hands shake, I'm not usually this way but/You pull me in and I'm a little more brave/It's the first kiss, it's flawless, really something/It's fearless”
This is making me emotional, I'll be honest. I see so much of my friends and my experience in high school in this song.
This quote I found on genius is from when the album was released on BMR’s website.
“When I wrote ‘Fearless,’ I wasn’t dating anyone. I wasn’t even in the beginning stages of dating anybody. I really was all by myself out on tour and I got this idea for a song about the best first date. I think sometimes when you’re writing love songs, you don’t write them about what you’re going through at the moment, you write about what you wish you had. So, this song is about the best first date I haven’t had yet.”
This just screams baby Tay writing gay folklore to me, about the gay stories she wish she had. Notice how there are no pronouns in this song??? Fruity I’m telling you.
All that to say. I’m crying because the linear note says “I loved you before I met you” and I want to go listen to Long Story Short and cry now.
2. Fifteen 1/10
Objectively pretty straight as she’s singing about her and Abigail’s dating boys in HS. And Taylor got with a senior guy. Good for her I suppose.
Unless he was one of the shitty ones in which case.
“This is life before you know who you're gonna be”
This however, is a cute line and the whole song makes me warm and nostalgic. You can also hear her crying after the line “and Abigail gave everything she had to a boy who changed his mind” which makes me emo and I’m sure will take on new depth after Abigail’s divorce and hurt me even more.
Other highlights that make me sob include.
“When all you wanted was to be wanted/Wish you could go back and tell yourself what you know now/Back then I swore I was gonna marry him someday/But I realized some bigger dreams of mine”
Bigger dreams of hers indeed :’)
(Also how can you say she’s a gold star lesbian when this song exists. She was obviously dating boys in high school and even if you think she’s a lesbian. Comp het is a hell of a drug kids.)
3. Love Story 8/10
Tried to change the ending indeed.
This is THE Taylor Swift song, and maybe it’s the nostalgia talking but damn I still love it. Written because she wanted to change the ending of Romeo and Juliet (how anyone likes RandJ enough to want to rewrite I have no clue.) and/or because her parents didn’t approve of a guy she was seeing. (according to genius, it would’ve been too early for Joe J so it could possibly be Boys Like Girls frontman, his image did clash with hers and they did release some cute songs together. However if you want my take it’s probably folklore about Emily, take for what you will)
This song has very oft gay vibes with the ‘They don’t approve of our love angle!’ but uses male pronouns so points redacted for that. HOWEVER this is a very early use of ~the male perspective~ in Taylor’s songs and for that it deserves all the love.
“ So I sneak out to the garden to see you/We keep quiet, 'cause we're dead if they knew/So close your eyes/Escape this town for a little while”
More rural town angst!!!
Nothing gets me more than rural town angst.
“Romeo, save me, they're trying to tell me how to feel/This love is difficult, but it's real”
Originally the lyric was “this love is different”. Granted I do not remember the source, i’s just lore implanted into my brain, but make of that what you will.
“"Marry me, Juliet, you'll never have to be alone/I love you, and that's all I really know/I talked to your dad, go pick out a white dress/It's a love story, baby, just say "Yes"”
Marry me Juliet from the male perspective :)
Also worth noting. This is Karlie’s (and Kim K’s lmao) favorite Taylor song which. While basic as hell. Makes this cover sad as hell to this former Kaylor. (thanks @swiftgron-get-married for the tears <3)
Also not to make this about a man AGAIN but the secret message is “Some day I’ll find this” AND SHE DID IM CRYING.
4. Hey Stephen 1/10
The one thing Camilla Cabello and I have in common is loving this song, so I have to live with that for the rest of my life.
This song is very painfully straight.
How can you think this woman is a gold star lesbian.
The only noteworthy thing is that this is one of the few songs she confirms who it’s about. The secret message is “Love and Theft” which is the name of a country music duo who went on to open her Fearless tour. Which, does make me side eye this song a little bit.
Still a cute song.
“Hey Stephen, boy, you might have me believing/I don't always have to be alone”
5. White Horse 1/10
Oh look. It’s track five.
You know maybe this is just me being a bitch but in my ranking of track fives this is. Pretty low. Maybe on the bottom.
Like I don’t have a lot to say about it.
She’s going through it over a guy. He was a cheating dickweazel.
“'Cause I'm not your princess, this ain't a fairytale/I'm gonna find someone someday/Who might actually treat me well”
“Try and catch me now, oh/It's too late/To catch me now”
These lines hit though!!
And she found Joe!! Who treats her well!!!! And she isn’t the princess, she’s the prince who dropped her sword and knocked on her door!!! But this time if they come for them she’s ready!!!
Yes I will make every song about Long Story Short <3
6. You Belong With Me 5/10
Ah yes. The other THE Taylor Swift song.
You know. If I went to a high school with a cheerleading squad. And I had a crush on a cheerleader. I would blast this song. So for that it gets a 5/10. Otherwise. Fairly straight and fairly iconic.
7. Breathe 8/10
Well. We know this one is about a woman. (Emily Poe for those not in the know. Ha. A rhyme!) That alone has an 8/10. And it’s the first time she has a featured artist so bonus points for that!
It was nominated for a Grammy and it fucking lost to Jason Mraz. When’s the last time you thought about Jason Mraz.
I will not have Kaylor feels on a fucking Fearless song but damn is it VERY easy.
“Never a clean break, no one here to save me/You're the only thing I know like the back of my hand”
“It's 2 A.M, feeling like I just lost a friend/Hope you know it's not easy, easy for me”
Also this bridge? Goes off. HIGHLY underrated.
8. Tell Me Why 3/10
You know. Maybe this album isn’t as gay as I once thought.
This song does bop though, not as good as her other angry songs on this album. But I can vibe with this you know. Why are you being an asshole mysterious man.
“You could write a book on how to ruin someone's perfect day”
This has to be one of baby Tay’s best burns. Damn.
“Why do you have to make me feel small/So you can feel whole inside?/Why do you have to put down my dreams/So you're the only thing on my mind?”
Men ain’t shit kids. However, bonus points for the shade.
9. You’re not Sorry 1/10
Ok, ok. Maybe this was a foolish endeavor.
Because yet again we have a very straight song. A good song. That was on Taylor’s episode of CSI. But oh dear. Very straight. Gets a measly one point. We started this post off so very very gay but damn. We seem to be nearing the end on a very straight note.
10. The Way I Loved You 20/10
Hey Remember what I said about this album being very straight.
WELL THAT WAS A LIE.
Is this a comphet album or am I projecting.
This is one of my favorite baby gay Taylor songs. Her masterful use of pronouns (he is sensible! And so incredible! And all my single friends are jealous! But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain, when it was two am and I was cursing your name!) makes the other person she’s singing about completely vague, while we know she isn’t happy with whichever guy she’s dating.
Mayhaps an early reaction to PRomances?
Either way this song is so good, truly an underrated gay gem I mean. Look at it.
“Breaking down and coming undone/It's a roller coaster kind of rush/And I never knew I could feel that much/And that's the way I loved you”
AND THE BRIDGE. Do all of her gay songs just have kickass bridges?
“He can't see the smile I'm faking/And my heart's not breaking/'Cause I'm not feeling anything at all/And you were wild and crazy/Just so frustrating/Intoxicating, complicated/Got away by some mistake and now…”
Damn. I’m imaging this with 2020 vocals and fucking ascending.
Also please watch the live performance of it from the Fearless tour. It’s such a damn shame this got cut from the movie and some woman in the front row is wearing a cowboy hat. Everyone is holding up those cameras everyone had to have before smartphones. Taylor is being endearing. It’s a good time.
11. Forever and Always 6/10
Bonus points for the ~drama~ of it all. Added last minute to the album? The iconic throwing of the chair in live performances?? All of it very dramatique and for that we stan.
Still pretty straight.
Also Joe Jonas responded to the song and why do I find his response so damn funny. “It’s part of being a musician, I guess. You write songs about each other.”
This is another song where the idea of Taylor’s grown up vocals on this is………..whew
12. The Best Day 0/10
This gets zero points because it’s about her literal mom.
Still makes me cry.
God bless Andrea Swift indeed
13. Change 13/10
We start the official tracklist with a gay song. We end it with a gay song.
We will ignore that it was originally written for Scott and BMR and instead induct it into the hall of gay pride anthems, as it should be.
“We're getting stronger now, finding things they never found/They might be bigger but we're faster and never scared/You can walk away, say we don't need this/But there's something in your eyes says we can beat this”
“This revolution, the time will come/For us to finally win/And we'll sing hallelujah, we'll sing hallelujah”
The music video is cringe though lol
14. Jump then Fall 10/10
This song is gay because I choose it to be. <3
Like. Picture baby Taylor writing this song and playing it on her guitar to a girl she has a crush on telling her that she’ll protect her and they’ll be safe and in love and happy together. Gah, maybe I’m ~projecting~ but this sweet ass song always gets me and is EASILY in my top five Taylor songs. Super underrated and hecking cute.
“We're on the phone and without a warning/I realize your laugh is the best sound/I have ever heard”
Like. Look at this shit.
“I watch you talk, you didn't notice/I hear the words but all I can think is/We should be together”
Tell me this is about the first time you get a crush on a girl and she’s your best friend and she’s amazing and beautiful and you realize you kinda want to kiss her and you hope she wants to kiss you too.
“I had time to think it oh, over/And all I can say is come closer/Take a deep breath and jump then fall into me”
And she’s the Romeo who's going to protect her!!!!! She’s the knight in shining armor in this song and I love that for her??
“The bottom's gonna drop out from under our feet/I'll catch you, I'll catch you/When people say things that bring you to your knees/I'll catch you/The time is gonna come when you're so mad you could cry/But I'll hold you through the night until you smile”
I won’t divulge into full on analysis here because. This is what this post is about but PLEASE listen to this song more. It’s such a gay little gem.
15. Untouchable 9/10
How does she make a cover sound gay.
It sounds so gay.
“You got to come on, come on, say that we'll be together/Come on, come on, little taste of heaven”
Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay
16. Forever and Always Piano Version 1/10
This song gets 1/10 because I don’t like it. There. I said it.
17. Come in With the Rain 3/10
I can see why this is a bonus track. It doesn’t hit me as much as the other songs on the album.
But damn if I don’t want to scream sing this one driving down a high way.
18. Superstar 7/10
You can’t tell me this song is about a man. I simply won’t entertain the idea.
You cannot prove to me that this song is about a man. There is not a male pronoun in sight.
>:)
19. The Other Side of the Door 6/10
Is this song about having a fight about being in the closet? Probably not. Will my gay little brain make it about that? Yep!
And that, funky little queer pals, is my gay rating of every Fearless song. Like and subscribe, #t3atmidnight
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