#desperate for freedom
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My husband is a man who collects things he can use. A pistol, a pocket-watch, a woman's love, a wife....
I'm obsessed with That Scene(tm) between Katya and Andrei in the California Director's Cut Rerelease of Goncharov, so I did a lighting study inspired by the film's Art Deco Posters! Little details like Katya never referring to her husband by his first name really add to Andrey and Katya's tense dynamic, which is one of the most underrated parts of the movie imo.
#Like? The way that Katya and Andrei both clearly envy each other#and resent each other for living the life they want to live#both of them clearly thinking-- if only I was in your shoes! I would live your life better#Andrei desperately wanting to be Goncharov's closest confidant (and lover)#Katya envying Andrei's freedom and closeness with Sofia#Andrei doesn't see how Katya's life stifles her and Katya doesn't see how Andrei's 'freedom' is an illusion#goncharov#unreality#gonchposting#katya goncharova#andrei daddano#my art#secretmellowart
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cyber!noah reverse au insp by @cayenneexe 's fic x
#noah diaz#rotb#transformers#reverse au#it is basically hound isnt it...#i know hes supposed to have finals but couldnt pry my eyes away from pasgt helmet from the 90's#my dms are open if anyone wants to talk about norage brainrot im here to listen#pls im so desperate#hometeam#noah x mirage#norage#miroah#mirage rotb#mirage#i really want to do a kris'#maccadam#my metal illness be damned home team brainrot real#mirage x noah#tf rotb#freedom racers au#?#it donet reall y look like ramos...faces are so hard dog T-T...
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Have you seen this man???
Now you have
#one piece#sabo#revolutionary sabo#my god I am obsessed#what a jolly little guy with guilt complexes to the moon and back and a healthy amount of murderous intent#I need to draw him more#I also desperately need more content of him#sorely disappointed in how many sabo-centric fics I’ve found#(very few)#I saw one au of sabo as a celestial dragon / world noble and I really really love that one#it’s an excellent deconstruction of sabo as a character and his view on freedom and equality coming from a place of privilege
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earlier today someone i was discussing beetlejuice with via dms brought up beetlejuice going to juilliard and at first i thought "oh yeah, that had to be him talking bullshit since he wasn't even alive by that point"
but then i was like. hold up.
he's been a ghost for 600 years. what's stopping us from guessing that he could've spent some time roaming the realm of the living just because someone didn't "put him back" or some other reason, like. maybe he did get to attend juilliard and people didn't even realize he was a ghost. just a really fucking creepy and stinky guy.
much to think about..........
#sorry i'm still a little bit drunk but i keep thinking about that#early 20th century ghost beetlejuice at juilliard after some schmuck summoned him and he spent years without being unsummoned#getting a taste of that type of freedom would probably make him desperate enough to attain it again through marriage#does this make sense. typing is hard#beetleposting
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different kind of freedom
art by 1very1fancy1doilies1 | eren | armin
#cl thoughts#this has been in my drafts for a long time#but just#desperate straining vs restrained calculations#that's them#when Armin seeks death it's wrapped in practicality: when it's Eren it's in reckless fervor- an unending scratching at the fabric of realit#hoping to peel it away and reveal a final freedom...#anyways#eremin#erearu#armin arlert#eren jaeger#deranged eremin
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Masters of the Air behind-the-scenes
#period clothing + modern items never fails to make me laugh#stalag bucky and gale enjoying some starbucks is iconic FRRR#masters of the air#bucky egan#gale cleven#I need an AU where they take the tunnel in the stalag but it’s actually a wormhole to modern day#and they stumble out into the set of MoTA#and everyone is like Wow they are really staying in character#meanwhile they are desperately trying to figure out where the hell they are and why the B-17’s won’t start up#bonus points for agony when bucky and gale slowly realize that by swapping places with two actors named callum and austin#they’ve basically left two guys in the stalag who don’t have the skills to survive in there#and when barry makes references to funny stories that never happened with Bucky he realized that it’s not his life to live#and that he needs to give his place back to callum#and so despite making it out of the stalag Bucky and Gale agree to go back#sacrificing their freedom so that two strangers they’ve never met (callum and austin) can have their lives back#and holding hands they head back into hell
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it's actually so funny and telling that the champion of the strife emperor is working with the volition and opposing the imperium. RIP to bane, I know you love a good imperium, a hot conquest, sexy war and subjugation and tyranny. alas this time the conquest, war, subjugation, and tyranny will KILL YOU, and so here we are. working with freedom fighters, of all things. oh how the mighty fall
#the champion of the god of conquest and tyranny working with a bunch of rebel freedom fighters is SO funny#the desperation is strong in this one#i was thinking about vezoden again and remembered this and it's so peak#the betrayers having to put in work to save everything is so fun actually#critical role#in ALL OTHER CONTEXTS bane would fuck with the ruby vanguard/imperium. not in this context though!
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Tiny Boy just wants to be Creative and will, in fact, risk being haunted for the chance to play.
Tiny Boy did not realize he was also risking Serious Physical Harm to do so.
Tiny Boy willing to risk both Haunting and Serious Physical Harm in order to play jazz music.
Tiny Boy says Right Words to save himself without even knowing.
Tiny Boy is gonna change everyone around him.
#jazz for two#korean bl#korean bl drama#korean bl series#korean drama#korean series#kbl#bl drama#bl series#asianlgbtqdramas#asian lgbtq dramas#oh no i love them#the tiny sunshine desperately seeking freedom and the traumatized young man who can't bear his light
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God I forgot how much people used bluenette completely unironically in otherwise serious fanfics
#in desperation for freedom I’ve resorted to rereading SEED fics from 15 years ago#I’m glad we stopped this#I mean I hope we did I don’t actually read fanfics about people with blue hair these days
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Characters who need to make themselves believe the ends justify the means. Forcing it down their throat, again and again and again. Till its second nature, till its addiction. And maybe the ends don't feel so pressing anymore, cus who knew the means could be so good.
#the pragmatic idealist burdened with both responsibility and hope#who lets their morals corrode over each compromise desperately reinforcing them with more and more questionable promises they cant keep#till they wear a crown of Machiavellianism set heavy like a gravestone#and when they finally let themselves indulge in the hedonism of the delusion#its not bitter like they expected#the Stockholm syndrome from their hand crafted cage long since set in#it feels like freedom#mori ougai#geto suguru#im not sure if this makes any sense#but i love this type of character#who sees it clearer than anybody else does#and takes it on even though its not theirs to take#and laughably they get it fkn wrong#and it breaks them#so they just stew in the absurdity of all the vain sacrifices and all the ends they drowned trying to pursue#and they force themselves to love the burn in their legs as they tread water cus they know they arent trying to swim to shore anymore#not really
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What if Crowley kisses Aziraphale gently, gently. Soft. Reverent. Like he is a pleasure to be savored, adored, to be treasured as long as possible.
What if Aziraphale kisses Crowley passionately. Savage. Carnal. Half-starved, mad with thirst, unsatiable, like he could never have enough of him. What if God killed me then
#go#Good omens#Good omens 2#aziracrow#Aziraphale#Crowley#Ineffable husbands#I know I knoe S2E6 but the thing is Crowley was DESPERATE. This is the after. The South Downs era#The certainty they've got the rest of their days and they've got each other. Like really each other#Crowley may be a snake but sometimes he feels the one being devoured#Crowley is a speed demon and owns little bc he doesn't want to get attached to things he might lose so easily#And then finally having the chance to slow down... To savor it...#Aziraphale is a hedonist but he never chooses himself#Aziraphale always chooses what needs to be done over what he wants#And then finally getting the freedom to let go. To love to devour...#They locked me in a room a rubber room
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I think sometimes we need to remember a books context
#this is about Stephen king#yes the author was high as shit on cocaine#which is probably why he wrote such horrific scenes#but also#a lot of women were stay at home wives even in the 80s#so yeah jacks wife didn’t leave him when he broke their sons arm#because leaving an abusive relationship is hard enough today#let alone in the 80s as a woman with no support or financial independence#you’re a teen in the 70s and your parents beat the shit out of you and you want out but you’re ugly and awkward and you find a car#and it’s ugly too but you can fix it up and you can see it now#so yeah you buy it and defend your decision against your friend#because you need some freedom#and some joy#the shining#christine#Stephen king#stephen king writes about human pride and error okay#honestly a lot of Stephen king stories are about someone in a rough headspace being taken advantage of#Jack was an alcoholic who was struggling to be a better person and the sprit of the hotel knew that#the boy in Christine and Carrie were both ugly and awkward teenagers needing a way out amd the evil gave them that#they guy in pet semetary had just suffered a horrific loss of his child and knew that there was a way to resurrect him#and he was being verbally abused by his in laws at his sons funeral prior#people in desperate places take desperate measures
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Sometimes s2 has me convinced Alfred actually hates Uhtred and then he goes and says shit like “I don’t know you! I can never know you, I…” in that small voice of his and I’m like oh. Oh NO. He’s even more down bad than I thought
#Rachel watches the last kingdom#alfred of wessex#alfred x uhtred#tlk#uhtred is DESPERATE for Alfred’s approval and his own freedom and alfred wants control AND devotion and MAN. match made in hell (loving)#the last kingdom 2x06
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finished the bg3 ironhand gnome plotline today and was wondering about the pulse of the fandom so i checked and
turns out almost everyone who played this game is a coward!! doesn’t see that bg3’s commentary on violence can be about resistance by any means necessary to the point that you turn the knife on every single one of the people you once called friend
#[slaps car] this baby can fit so much dialectics about direct action in it!#really makes you think how much of wulbren’s motivation is the ironhand vs gondian religious affiliations & history of violence or#an absolute last tactic to stop gortash whatever the cost. which only tracks if#wulbren was gearing up to kill himself in moonrise towers so the absolute wouldn’t get his runepowder design.#like that’s the line between viewing his pov as an underdog tyrant or going scorched earth as a result of a lifetime of desperation.#which way did he get radicalized? in trying to kill the gondians is he aligning with the absolute and bhaal on purpose or despite it all?#and (i say this only knowing about bg1 and not the details of the bg3 durge playthrough) the bhaalspawn is bg’s commentary on#violence as inheritance. fate vs freedom. the ways in which we take our parents with us. & wulbren/barcus could extend this politically#think about it. think about it!#barcus wroot#wulbren bongle#bg3
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Hey do you think Jamil has trouble seeing people his age as peers?
Like, growing up having to be a caretaker to a guy literally a few months older than him, always expected to act like the adult in the situation, expected to work with adults and adopt their perspectives and pick up their slack. Do you think he just, forgets sometimes?
I mean we've seen him go into caretaker mode with other sophomores, and the only people I've seen him take seriously are juniors like Vil who also act much older than they should have to (his reactions to Leona look more like a trauma response and I don't wanna get into it here). People like Malleus and Cater still somewhat get the caretaker treatment. Like I just highly doubt that he subconsciously realizes he's actually part of his age group
Aaand that inevitably brings up Azul, who also acts like he thinks he's older than he is. Whether you're looking at it from a shipping angle or not, he reacts to Azul like an actual peer. With older students, he seems more in his element but there's still a status hierarchy which he compulsively reacts to. With Azul he doesn't acknowledge any status worth respecting or see him as someone who needs to be looked after. He just bickers like an equal, in a way that implies he actually does see Azul as a real peer, like subconsciously he's categorized this guy into the same group as himself, who was previously alone on that level (he gets like this more with the twins too, over time, but it seems to start with Azul).
And my favorite part about this is, while that response stems from them both acting more like adults in general, they elicit a pettiness from each other which drags them both down to actually acting their own age, and I just love that. Their characters are perfect foils for each other and it seems to make them both less isolated in a way.
#idk how to fully explain this thought in the azul department#but other than that its... yeah. forced maturity is so fucking isolating#I'm not surprised the only people he seems to hang around with are the fish even though he claims to hate them#since they seem to be in a similar boat with that#jamil viper#on a more shippy note:#I feel like Jamil NEEDED someone who he didn't feel the need to respect. in order to avoid falling into programmed behaviors#he's able to be a person around Azul in a way that nobody else can give him#specifically because Azul CAN keep up. but doesn't command his respect in any way that his employers would force him to acknowledge#and stubbornly refuses to leave despite Jamil being an asshole in his desperate attempts to feel some sense of freedom and control#which results in him wearing himself out enough to calm down and socialize while actually being treated with respect and equality anyway.#And it seems like Azul needed to find someone that he couldn't just attain or control from behind his own walls#he's desperate for the attention of someone who refuses to let him play the role he's developed to distance himself from others#so he has to treat himself more like a real person in order to get what he wants#which is a guy who challenges him enough to prove that it's not just him and the twins vs the ignorant masses#he's spent so long building himself a fortress of wealth and arrogance to protect him from the rest of the world#and now he's faced with the fact that he can't stay in there and still get what he wants no matter how many well practiced tricks he uses#and suddenly they're both just teenagers bickering in school with a peer like everyone else for the first time in their lives#this got off topic
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How the caged bird sings the song he's told to, in darkness and in solitude, trapped in a place where he cannot be himself and with the looming threat of the lock being slammed shut on him and leaving him without any place to go now that he's taste freedom.
#jazz for two#the caged bird#korean bl#kbl#bl drama#bl series#asianlgbtqdramas#asian lgbtq dramas#korean bl drama#korean bl series#korean drama#korean series#he's just so desperately lonely at home#and so desperate for any chance at freedom
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