#definitely not scared! nope!

[jamiesfootball]

I’m curious (if you’re willing to share) — is your post season 3 fic shippy or platonic? Looking forward to it!

Both of the main ones I'm working on now are platonic! But also you've opened the door for me to talk about it so I'm gonna talk about it!

The post-season 3 fic is platonic and--I cannot overstate this enough--has so much of a plot going on across multiple characters that I finally broke down and made a fucking spreadsheet.

That said a lot of Roy's struggle in this fic centers around his emotional attachments with other people and the roles he plays in their lives (with family, with friends, as a coach). He's stuck in this perfect storm where it seems like all his most important relationships are in flux.

See below the cut for spoilers:

His Family

This is a big one for him and where a surprising amount of therapy work gets done. When the story kicks off, Phoebe is suddenly Around Much Less and a part of that is his sister tentatively feeling out a reconciliation with their parents. This causes a surprising (to Roy) amount of emotional upheaval in his life. As someone who's always been in his sister's corner, he's always seen (even if he's never fully verbalized it to himself) his keeping contact with their parents as a way of releasing his sister from any responsibility or lingering guilt about cutting them off. But now that she's tentatively in contact with them, and introducing them to Phoebe, Roy is realizing that he has a lot of unresolved issues with his parents. Adding to that stress is the fact that while he's played a huge role in his niece's life, he's never actually had to ask to spend time with her before, and he is awful at admitting he might need something, especially when the people around him keep telling him he can 'have a break.'

Keeley

He and Keeley have decided to remain friends. Keeley wants to be single for a while and work on herself, her company, and all the special projects she has falling out of her sleeves (*cough*womensteam*cough*). However, Keeley is the most serious relationship he's ever had, and they started out on a flirty, romantic footing, so he's never just been friends with her. In fact he's never stayed friends with any of his exes. He's navigating unfamiliar territory and he's not sure what's allowed of him. Even basic shit--is he allowed to tell her she looks nice? invite her for coffee? for dinner?--he ends up second guessing.

The Diamond Dogs / The Workplace

He literally JUST became a Diamond Dog and showed them emotional vulnerability by asking what the secret was to becoming a less shitty person and now he's in charge of them. (And he's in therapy, seeing the staff therapist, so everybody knows about that too.) With Ted gone, the inter-team dynamics between the coaches is a whirlpool of Beard and Nate trying to out-smart each other, and suddenly Roy is the one keeping everybody in line and fielding Higgins' questions about player recruitment. This isn't the big drama but it is mundane and tedious and just another fucking thing to deal with.

The Team (Sam, Isaac, Colin)

The step between captain and assistant coach was a fairly easy one for Roy because he was essentially doing the same thing in both jobs (yell at them about their form, psych them up before a match, etc). He's the gaffer now. Most gaffers don't just casually hang out with their players. If he was another team's gaffer, he wouldn't. But these are people who know him, people he used to play side-by-side with, and god help him but he does care about them. So while he's pretty sure he needs to start drawing a boundary between the professional and personal, how the fuck is he supposed to tell them that when Colin is literally getting chewed up by the media as the only openly gay player in the league and he clearly needs the support? How's he supposed to back away when Sam, who's never angry about anything, is fucking seething over Edwin Akufo and asking Roy for help? Is he supposed to step back and drop it all on Isaac, who's trying his best but also seems to be carrying his own weight about something? They're not not his friends, but also he feels responsible for them. So what kind of coach is he going to be, now that he's the guy in charge?

Jamie (ofc)

Where does any of the above leave Jamie? Truly, if the boundaries between him and the other players are in flux, the ones between him and Jamie are fucking spaghetti. Because all of the same issues still apply, but with additional layers (their rivalry, Keeley, Amsterdam, Wembley, personal coaching, the fact that he's met Jamie's parents and would punch his dad in the face if he ever got a chance, the fact that his niece thinks they're best friends). His partiality is skewed every-which-fucking-way, and frankly he's a little annoyed that no one else holds it against him.

And all of that becomes additionally fucked up because:

Roy going to therapy is intrinsically tied to his behavior towards Jamie (Roy has a lot of guilt to work through on how often he's taken his anger out on Jamie)

Jamie and him have unwisely turned therapy into a goddamn competition (they have a chart), which means that any time he makes progress in therapy, he immediately ends up sharing it with Jamie

They don't even have the coach-player thing to fall back on because Jamie starts off the summer injured

This is also the Jamie Going Through It fic (with Tartt Sr in rehab being a huge part of that), and at this point its a given (to Roy at least) that if Jamie needs help, Roy is going to help him.

Jamie might be his friend. Maybe. Possibly. Roy might even admit that one day

So is this a shippy fic? No! No relationship statuses are added, lost, or changed in the winding plot of this fic (unless I figure out how to break up Beard and Jane). Everything picks up right where the finale left it.

But do relationships--the weight of identifying what you might need from other people, and how to navigate changes, and how to define things that aren't easy that are maybe complicated and messy and necessary for your own personal happiness--appear in this fic?

Absolutely yes.

[emin-folly]

Imagine that there's this person whose whole thing is being without fear and the fandom decides he's afraid of a dude in a fursuit.

Fandom Logic (tm)

I think it comes down to primarily two reasons, one being because people think it's funny

They think it's funny that this character without fear can suddenly be afraid of this human Bat guy. If it was just a few people in the fandom doing this, it wouldn't be nearly as bad; people are after all allowed to do whatever they want, even if we don't like it. The problem lies in where the actual comic writers start adapting this as canon as it's a huge disservice to Hal's character

The second reason is just basically these people legitimately think Hal should be afraid of Bruce because he's ~The Batman~ (which, again, you're allowed to think that, just know that's not really in character for Hal....like at all)

The whole deal with Bruce is that, both in universe and in real life, he's designed to terrify low level criminals: thugs, crooks, any unsavory person who wanders the Gotham alleyways. That's the environment Bruce works the best in. Where he can easily slip into the shadows, where he can become the night and make himself out to be a monster he wants to be. The only people who should be afraid of Batman are the ordinary hoods and criminals that infest cities

But when you suddenly stick him in a brightly lit room like the Hall of Justice next to all these colorful superheroes, that's where his effectiveness pretty much stops. All his tactics and methods to scare people don't really work here. Suddenly, he's just some guy in a bat getup with a scowly mask on. And these are seasoned superheroes, they don't scare easily, especially the ones with powers like speedsters or Kryptonians. Bruce is out of his element. Everything he does to try to act scary should look comical and silly at best

And as for Hal, I think we can all agree that Hal has definitely seen some shit. He goes off into deep space, for months up to a year or so. Who knows what kind of unimaginable horrors he's had to deal with?? Going a bit into headcanon area, but I think that if Hal wasn't desensitized before, he definitely is now. He's not afraid of space Cthulhu and he is not gonna be afraid of a bat furry who furrows his eyebrows really hard. Hal isn't scared of anything--physical, that is. And I feel like Hal is definitely the kind of person who sees straight through Bruce's BS posturing, Bruce's whole act just doesn't work on Hal.

Unfortunately, just like a tornado, any character who comes close to a Bat gets dealt major damage and we're still picking up the pieces and trying to set things straight again OTL

[hyperfixation-fix]

Me: Nah, I don't really identify that strongly with any of the Marauders.

...

...

...

Me: *posts 100 angst posts about the black brothers*

[frodo-baggins]

looks like i’m officially returning to uni to carry on w my phd studies in the autumn 😬

[alithetiredartist]

Post canon boiling isles politics fights are probably so funny. Like “NO THIS TEENAGERS IS EVIL” “NO THEY WERE THE GOOD ONES” whatever the boiling isles equivalent to thanksgiving is probably like hell

[blueshykitsune-blog]

Hey btw when you feel like you wanna kiss your makeout with your friends, you probably like them more than friends right?

[angst-is-love-angst-is-life]

Hmmm

I can’t help but think about how Flash season two would’ve gone if ‘Jay’ (Hunter) fell for Barry instead of Caitlin

[userkoo]

existing with a phobia is hell on earth and i am truly sorry to anyone who has to live with one :/

[running-in-the-dark]

a super fun thing that my brain is really good at is hearing a random fact and remembering it forever. but only if it's bad :)

[exoexid]

i've never had so many emotions while reading a webtoon, but the thing with lost in the cloud is that they are very complex, confusing and contradicting ones 😁🤩

[stampsthecircuscat]

90% sure what I just heard was a very distant siren but there is a 10% chance it was someone screaming and echoing through the cold, dreary and dark night.... And that sounds a lot cooler so imma say it was that.

[neutraldragon]

[my-strange-attraction]

Looking through some old posts on this blog and. Bro the way I fully realized I was VERY repressed but then just interpreted it as sex repulsion. I mean no harm done, really, but damn. This has been going on a while, huh.

[slashingdisneypasta]

.

[rosicheeks]

I wish I could hold you, make you feel all warm and safe and tell you how pretty you are

I think if anyone said anything about how I look or anything sexual I would bite them hard enough to draw blood

[fractallogic]

There’s a BookTuber I’m subscribed to now and she’s so sweet. Like we have fundamentally different priorities (she didn’t immediately get a library card upon moving to a new city??? She hasn’t visited all of the indie bookstores near her, just B&N???), but she’s so cute and so happy and has such an interesting way of doing the parasocial relationships on her videos. CHARMING.