#defination of self care
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What is Self-Care? Self-Care Ideas and Importance of self care
(person meditating or practicing yoga.) why self-care is significant; its perks and practical advice that promote physical, emotional, mental and spiritual wellness in an individual’s life. What is Self-Care? Self-care isn’t merely a trending phrase; it is one of the most important components for keeping healthy and stable life. WHO has defined “self care” as “the ability of individuals,…
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#defination of self care#self care#self care benefits#self care for women mental health#what&039;s is self care
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Don’t let their energy change yours.
#stay true to yourself#don’t be defined by others#protect your energy#your path is your own#energy#quote#motivación#love#spirituality#spiritual awakening#inspiring quotes#quoteoftheday#meditation#inspiration#quotes#uplifting news#powerful#possibilities#positive#mental health#well being#wellness#self care#motivation#inspiring words#wise words#words of wisdom
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honestly Percy and Nico's dynamic is made even funnier when you take into account how Will is written in TSATS. Like, oh okay then, Nico just has horrible taste in men and keeps getting smitten with boys who loathe everything he stands for. Percy stopped being Nico's type because Percy started to respect him too much. Cupid is yelling at Nico to raise his standards while Nico scopes out the latest guy who will treat him wrong to take on a date to the Underworld.
#pjo#percy jackson#riordanverse#nico di angelo#will solace#TSATS#the sun and the star#Cupid: YOU CAN DO BETTER || Nico: You're right! I *could* do worse! || Cupid: *NO*#Nico's self-esteem is so low he thinks people who respect him are a deal-breaker. Cupid Reyna Hazel and Jason screaming in the bg#Nico handshake emoji Leo. ''i know they dont like me and want me to get rid of everything that defines me. but they're willing to date me''#Leo's desperate for approval so he has an excuse. Nico doesnt care about fitting in though so he's just doing that to himself for no reason#these boys have so many problems but it's kinda funny. and makes for interesting narrative
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nina salazar-roberts is such a beautiful case study in comphet and I genuinely think her arc deserves so more appreciation
#female main character who does NOT end up with a guy?? whose arc is about defining her worth around her relationships with men and realizing#she is so much more as a person outside of that#who loves and adores her friends and values every one of her friendships with them with the care and intensity of a romantic relationship??#whose self worth isnt tied to being The Best because she just wants to express herself for HER and make art with her friends#because she loves them and sees the beauty in making something with the people you love even if she isnt the star#and finds the balance between caring about her relationships and having an identity outside of them#of course the fandom hates her. yall can't stand any female character who has a personality outside of her love interest#people who call her bland or selfish or whatever annoy me so much. she's a TEENAGE GIRL figuring out who she wants to be jfc#and is just trying her best and cares so fucking much about the people around her#i love her so much and am so glad she exists as a main character#hsmtmts#nini salazar roberts#olivia rodrigo#also i think liv embodies so much of her in her music#all american bitch. scared of my guitar. enough for you#she's just such a relatable depiction of the messy teenage girl experience
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Things To Remember ~
~ you are so loved
~ a mistake is just that, it does not define you
~ you are allowed to say no
~ it's okay to ask for help
~ your boundaries are important
~ productivity does not define your worth
~ things will be okay
#Things To Remember ~#~ you are so loved#~ a mistake is just that#it does not define you#~ you are allowed to say no#~ it's okay to ask for help#~ your boundaries are important#~ productivity does not define your worth#~ things will be okay#self love#self care#important reminders#positivity#quotes#quoteoftheday#spilled thoughts#relatable quotes#reading#relationship quotes#inspiring quotes#art#romance quotes#shakespeare
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Kraz, royal healer
Kraz (Razzy if they like you(but they like everyone)(except Jerry)) is a human (?) mage who voluntarily exiled themselves to the underground to follow monsterkind during the war. They are later appointed royal healer by the king and queen and has devoted themselves to the betterment of monster society ever since. They are the only human the royal scientist ever tolerated (although would you call sharing lab coats and beds tolerating or...something else?)
Information
-Species : mage (half monster, half human)
-Age : older than the barrier. As long as they will to live, it appears that a mage cannot age.
-Gender : apparently born a female, although it is unclear how sexual dimorphism develops in mages. Kraz does not specifically care.
-Soul : Green
-Height : 1.99m (6'5)
-Hair colour : Black (somehow iridescent ?)
-Eye colour : deep dark brown. Their sclera is grey as well.
-Build : sickly thin, actually skin and bones. They never eat much of anything, claiming that they do not need a lot of food. It worries people quite a lot, especially Toriel, but they have been like this for hundreds of years so... at least they're not dead ? Still, they scare the kids.
-Personnality : a sweet, calming presence. They exude an aura which makes anyone around them feel at peace. Although they are quite akward and generally anxious, they smile easily and brightly. Kraz is very friendly, caring, and kind to a fault. has quite an outdated manner of speech. A jokester. Always does their best to please people around them. Deeply devoted. Probably has some sort of attention deficit. Easily fascinated. Suffers from chronic bird behaviour (will bring you trinkets??).
-Likes : gardening, playing the piano, cooking, puzzles, collecting shiny trinkets, science, herbal medicine, cultivating bacteria, gift giving, late 1800's fashion, dark spaces, funny socks, Gaster.
-Dislikes : loud noises (especially clamoring crowds), being watched, sudden movements, bright reflective surfaces, small enclosed spaces, bitter foods.
Backstory
Kraz was born to a human mother and a monster father during the war, as mages often are. Abandoned by their mother, who could not endure the shame of their birth, they were taken under their father’s wing and raised amongst a small monster village. Early on, they manifested an extremely intense green soul and spectacular magical power, even for a mage. Although unequipped and unprepared to nurture such potential, the monsters in Kraz's community did their best to encourage the toddler's magical prowess, such as having them heal cuts and bruises, or speed up a few carrots' growth. But as war progressed, human armies swept through monster territory and eventually raided the child's village, pillaging and slaughtering everyone in their path. In these times mages were rare, being the product of monster-human relationships, but extremely sought after by humanity, who could only manifest minor magic potential. Stumbling upon the young Kraz and recognising in their physiology the traits of a "hybrid", human soldiers immediately identified them as a mage and took them away to be raised amongst humans. Their father, if he ever survived the attack, never stopped looking for his little bird until his dust settled on the ground. And so Kraz was raised in human war camps and settlements, amongst soldiers and other mages. Being so young, they only ever had vague memories of their time amongst monsters and soon put them to rest. As they grew, their healing powers grew with them, and it was soon clear to the commanders that Kraz may as well be the most spectacular healer that they had ever known, capable of rising men at death's door back on their feet and ready to fight in mere minutes. Suffice to say, as one of their greatest asset, they were sent from battlefield to battlefield, from division to division in order to rise the almost dead and reinforce the dwindling human forces. But they had a fault. Kraz, at their heart, was kind. Compassionate. Caring. And oh so, so young still, no more than fifteen. And the pain, the suffering inflicted by and to monsters broke their soul into pieces. See, despite all the propaganda, they could never quite bring themselves to hate monsters. Hate half of themselves. And so in the midst of the battle's confusion, in secret, they would slip a hand or a green bullet towards a bleeding frog here. A dusting lion there. They wished they could just run to them and pour their whole magic into the wounded, but the human soldiers watched them. Always. But eventually, as war was nearing its end, temptation was too great. They could take it no more. And so during a bloody battle, they slipped away from the soldiers surrounding them and ran to a fallen monster, who was already dusting away. A skeleton. The young mage fell to their knees, reaching for the monster's broken face with magic already at their fingertips and reassurances spilling from their lip, and poured everything they had left as the soldier tried to struggle and speak. He barely was able to call to them, in a language they didn't know, his bones just starting to reform, but fate is oh so cruel. Kraz could only slip their guard's attention for so long, and just as life started to flicker back in the man's face, they were torn off his bloodied body and promptly covered in his dust, their work undone by the fall of a sword. As the soldiers dragged the teen away, they could only claw down at the dusty floor to rack up the dust, and a nametag. Dingbats.
"Traitor", they were deemed. "An error of nature", "a freak", they were called. But a valuable freak nonetheless. Their magical abilities were still wholly unmatched through all of the land. They were needed. And so Kraz was beaten down, corrected, whipped back into shape. Into following orders. Royals spoke of banishment. Of a barrier. And they needed mages.
Finally, monsters were defeated. They were to be sealed underground. Kraz and the other mages assembled, staring down at a beaten monsterkind, a sea of eyes and bleeding hearts crying out at them as they chanted the words.
They couldn't do it. They couldn't.
They ran to them.
As the barrier rose up, this child fell to their knees in front of Asgore and Toriel and begged them to let them stay. To right this wrong. To help. They did.
And so Kraz poured their heart out. It wasn't easy, getting monsters to accept human help, even though they shared some physical traits. They slaved away for nothing in return, growing crops magically in dead ground and never taking even a grain of wheat for themselves. Endlessly imbuing water with their energy to create remedies for everyone. Only accepting the bare minimum of food to stay alive, even though they felt as if they were tearing this food away from the hands of the needy. They tried so, so hard to repair humanity's sins. Clear their name in the eyes of monsters.
And eventually, it somewhat worked. Instead of frowns, they were faced with smiles. Children stopped crying when they saw the healer's incomplete beak and started to spare them a smile. The elderly stopped refusing treatment from them. And even though they still had to face a seemingly unclimbable wall as they began further studies in medicine, biology and microbiology, chemistry, agricultural sciences, magical studies, anything to broaden their knowledge and help, they made it. (No thanks to the shy, awkward, standoffish and straight up rude engineering-chemistry-physics student which whom the king and queen pushed Kraz to hang out with. They said that it would "help the both of you, you kids would work beautifully together". Not that the mage minded, as a matter of fact they quite enjoyed his presence and always did their best to be agreeable and overall lovely company; but the skeleton never quite seemed to get over his absolute loathing of humans. Oh well, no matter. They'll keep trying anyways.). Eventually they did succeed and ascended to the position of "tolerable fellow student who I regularly hang out with" in the eyes of their adversary. When Kraz got their first doctorate, in medicine, WingDings even cracked a smile. And as the two completed their studies, the now mage-doctor was promoted to "acceptable collaborator". A win for the ages!
Kraz finally moved out of the derelict place they were practicing medicine in since the war to a more acceptable place (which was, well, their newly furnished house, courtesy of the royal family for their friendship and as a congratulatory gift for their doctorate) and kept working as always. But with an official title to strengthen their position, and what some may call a reluctant friend, things seemed lighter. Monsters were flocking to their office, business (which was still free but their patients insisted on leaving little somethings) was booming, their ties to their fellow "collaborator " deepening, and the doctor became sincerely appreciated in their community. Maybe not in all monsterdom yet, memories of the war never quite fading, but it was progress. Things were going well.
But it seemed that fate had other plans.
One day, plague broke out. The illness decimated monster populations, entire families perishing from an unknown condition.
And Kraz, oh Kraz, tried everything. Every spell, every potion, every cure they could think of. Nothing worked. They asked for help to the other healers, consulted with other scientists, even asked the engineers if they could think of something, anything. Nothing worked. They could only watch as the malady swept through monsters, powerless to watch them die, just like they did during the war.
No. No.
They would not stand for it, they would not STAND FOR THIS !! They will find a cure. At any cost.
They locked themselves in their laboratory.
One day. Two days.
Three days.
Six days.
Eight days.
Their colleagues had tried banging on the door, shouting at them to come out, to go home, they would not answer. They called for the doctor’s friends, to no avail. Eventually, it was WingDings Gaster, the royal scientist himself, to be at their door threatening them to “kick their feathery ass if it’s the last thing he does” in order to get them to open the damn door.
No answer.
But the royal scientist was a stubborn man. And when words failed, he proceeded to take the door’s security system apart and barge into the lab, only to be taken aback by the stench. He covered his non-existent nose with a sleeve and bit back the urge to let last night’s dinner see the light of day again, ushering the doctor’s worried coworkers away. It reeked of illness. It reeked of plague. The skeleton, being the only one without lungs and hence immune to all airborne diseases, made his way through the mess of papers, vials and…patches of blood and hair…to the form bent over his friend’s table. Kraz was staring straight at him with their big, beady dark eyes which seemed to be glazed over. They looked even paler than they usually do, which is to say whiter than snow, and seemed so frail that they could snap at any moment. Their face was also swimming in what seemed to be bloodied spit, over a mountain of papers scribbled with words that made no sense. Suffice to say, they looked like death itself. They looked dead.
It was as if Gaster’s bones were made of ice. Barely thinking, he grabbed his friend’s limp body, by Asgore were they TALL, and zapped away somewhere safe. Somewhere clean. His place, apparently.
He cleaned Kraz. Changed them. Laid them in bed. Listened to their delirious babbles, relieved that at least they were alive. In a moment of clarity, the doctor pleaded him to retrieve some instruments from their lab and conduct a series of tests on samples of their blood, which he was urged to collect daily.
“I need to help them Dings. Please. Please, I beg of you, do this for them. Or else I would have done this for nothing. Please.”
Eventually, the unthinkable happened. They got better, the little colour their cheeks normally had returned. As soon as the healer could walk again, they were out of their friend’s house and back in their lab (ignoring everyone’s admonishments). Barely a week later, there was a cure for the seemingly incurable plague.
Monsterkind was saved.
And everything was truly fine. Kraz was promoted to Royal Doctor (a fact they endlessly teased Gaster with, because Now you can’t boss me around anymore mister science man), was granted a whole department in the Hotland labs, and was now revered though the kingdom! Their promotion to head doctor was also accompanied by another, to the exclusive rank of “beloved special stupid idiot who gave themselves the plague” in the soul of a certain someone. They weren’t going to live that one down anytime soon. But well, when the royal scientist’s coworkers noticed that his lunch was packed daily in the common room fridge with “Do not forget nourishment today dear, I will see you tonight at our usual, -A stupid idiot “stuck to it, let’s say that the air in the Core labs was decidedly more pleasant. And Alphys, a young intern that the Doctor befriended during one of their numerous visits to their collaborator-friend-lover(?), could barely contain her gushing to anyone that might listen.
Yes. Times were good.
Until a human fell.
#undertale oc#character sheet#Kraz#YIPEE FINALLY DONE!!!#I am so so excited to get you guys know them better#I'm still trying to define their personnality precisely but I've been thinking about them FOREVER#their lore is a little insane but. They're weird too.#Literally a bird. Has bird behaviour SO BAD#I'll draw them doing stupid shit dont worry. Bringing Gaster beads and stuff. A lover's offering.#They look scary as hell but actually they're a big softie. Very silly and kind person.#The giganormous half beak giant height and skeleton apearance just don't help#I love them.#permission from/to my mutuals to draw razzy interracting with your guys ?#(if i ever have time to draw lmao)#they're dating the royal scientist because I need to kiss that goop man personally#their relationship is science x science (different flavours) they're the worst lmao#kraz is the only seemingly responsible one#they have this self care thing nailed (forces Gaster to eat and shower)#date night is either gaster building something and kraz doing the very meticulous bits or running tests on razzy's new bacteria farm#“Can you make a bacteria that tastes like tomato sauce” well a week and a half later apparently yes you can#these two i swear#Kraz wears funny socks and Gaster funny ties. The funny sciences.#my art#my oc
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I beg people in the MW to think very carefully when they talk about mental illness and physical disability cause it’s not as straight forward and easy to diagnose/depict as you think…
#it’s less I hate the analysis more so the way people talk about these real mental disorders in really demonizing ways#like there aren’t people who leads normal lives#and are well adjusted with these disorders like only people like them can do shit Jimmy does and it’s in a really fear mongering way like#please be careful with how you handle those subject matter not every bad character needs a reason why some people are just like Jimmy no#no clear diagnosis or if ur gonna pick something you don’t need to be on the apd spectrum to be narcissistic it’s just like I wish people#would understand that like people like him just exist he would not be diagnosed as either in like a clinical setting cause it’s more than#just hitting the boxes plus like it’s stated that Jimmy still choice to do what he was doing#like a big thing with sort of violent apd personalities is they don’t show any regret or remorse at all for these actions and he does it’s#born from self preservation but to this extent to classify he’d have to still not feel anything like it’s just a touchy thing and we are#bordering on the same fear mongering people had about schizophrenia or bpd#like I just feel like he def has something but it’s not named or define for a reason like he practically fits everything and it’s likely i#intentional so you can give him that excuse but it’s likely he’s just like that like some people are cruel with no sort of neurosis like hes#def delusional but sociopaths and psychopaths tend to have a better grip on reality than he does#did and more factors point to himself than anything going on in his head#this is just the psych in me but pls be super careful with how you discuss mental illnesses cause it’s still his choice to do the things he#mouthwashing
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daisuke’s desire to be independent and confident and reliable like dark versus dark’s desire for compassion and vulnerability and intimacy like daisuke. it’s never one or the other it’s always both of them at once wanting to be like their inversions and yet thereby producing the exact same singular individual at their core. a devil with a cherub heart and a cherub with a devil’s, both of them in the longing dark!!
#mobile.#cooking and started thinking about how many people ignore the fact#dark desperately wants to be daisuke because they can’t fathom#why im a jerk and everybody loves me.png would ever actually want to change#and be someone kinder so that he could get real intimacy#and actually firmly. legitimately. intimately connect with even just one person#daisuke constantly admires dark for his strength and noble independence#but that comes with the unspoken caveat of loneliness and awkwardness in ever having to be the one#being taken -care- of. that’s what so much of the third light novel was about#dark doesn’t know how to ever say what he wants or to lower his pride and his jealous guard#it makes him; defines him in such a way that even daisuke says it’s ’too undarklike to rely on others’#but dark himself would like to; the way daisuke so readily#accepts and forms bonds as someone who’s helplessly sincere#(yes including dark’s presence and influence forming the necessity of him having to lie)#oghhhh#basically dark ultimately wishing he WAS kinder that he WAS a ‘good’ person#in itself being an infinitely redeeming trait + sooo relatable#for anybody who grew up into an awkward teenager convinced there was something wrong with them#and that things were already too late. came to all the unfortunate and unhelped self realizations#yeah….#end ramble eiehbensjxhcj
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i have this hot take about how an individualist society could never properly define a 'people pleaser' because the things they see as 'people pleasing' will always be evenly split between 'basic human decency made transactional by capitalism' and 'girl that's something way worse than people-pleasing what the hell'
#'im a recovering people pleaser' so close! youre being a c*nt#like as long as this train of thought leads down the marketed self-care pipeline congrats you havent escaped#'im a people pleaser' define people#anyway. people pleasers that have explored this this isnt about u#do know that im probably angling this at a demographic that wouldnt see my tumblr#mimzamine
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Genuinely, how are the Alastor takes from the finale SO. BAD.???
media literacy is truly dead y'all
#even saw someone say a line clearly meant one thing and ppl were bad at interpretating but but GURL#UR THE ONE ADDING STUFF THAT ISN'T STATED#ALSO MORALLY GREY/UNDECIDED BC THE CHARACTER ITSELF DOESN'T TRULY UNDERSTAND OR IS SURE IF THEIR IS CHANGE IN THEM IS A THING!!!!#not saying it's Al's case#but for the sake of argument just good/evil or being secretly good/evil inside is .... just not the only options guys#ESPECIALLY IN HAZBIN HOTEL#like of all shows lmao#my personal pov is that he realized that he COULD care but isn't at that point yet and NOWHERE does it clearly show or state in ANY way that#the deal is him being at the hotel#FFS ppl fan theories ARE NOT CANON#the only clear thing he says is that he WILL NOT die for someone else and be altruistic AS IN SELF-LESS GOOD DOER PER DEFINITION#he could still slowly care for charlie etc AND NOT BE ALTRUISTIC JFC#also how about the fact that he doesn't want OTHERS to define his story???#the takes and comments I've seen about the finale revelations concerning Alastor ARE SO BAD AND WILD#*BIGGEST SIGH*#i need to stop reading comments on YT for real....#hazbin hotel#hazbin alastor
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hitting them with the girl beam (+ pre-judgment era beam)
#kuwagami#kitakata sensei#jin kuwana#kuwana jin#yagami takayuki#takayuki yagami#lost judgment#judgment#jichanart#sorry for making this about sensei again... sensei era is so important to me#for the record i dont think she'd smoke in the staff room but that's the pose i wanted to draw#ANYWAY#hard to imagine their canon era selves looking much different#but at least pre-Life Defining Incident there's more wiggle room i think#there's probably something to be said about having them go from visibly feminine to more androg#like it's partly practicality. because do you want to do what they do while having to worry about your clothes or managing long hair? no#but for kuwana i think of it as kind of part of the freedom of self determination after being forcibly ejected from mainstream society#she doesn't have to make herself palatable anymore. no boss to scold her for cutting her hair so short#it's easier to take care of. she likes how it looks. it just makes sense#i reckon she would've gotten more piercings if she could but holds off to have less obviously identifiable features#in case she needs to go on the run#<- also a hc for kuwana in general not just girlkuwana#not sure if that's silly to think especially since he probably has scars and those are ALSO identifiable#ANYWAY enough rambling#kuwana should pull yagami's hair.#reminder to myself to make more girl art of them
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had the most braindead repetitive conversation/argument with my parents. buzz cuts are too masculine but if you dye a design on it it become effeminate which is bad because then you look weak and if youre weak then society falls apart (all societies ever that have fallen apart for any reason are actually because of feminine men) and we start sacrificing babies. and also all mental illness is invented because only 4 people had anxiety in the 90s and covid was made up so that we would all become gay and trans and then the government can control us better and be joe biden's little sex slaves. and also i need to keep my hair long because my father finds it attractive. what
#lolaa.txt#what do i even tag this with . my mother wouldn't let me leave and i kept asking for sources and she kept saying 'i'm your mother!!!'#'i wouldnt lie to you!'#okay. say that to someone maybe who doesnt know you lie to them all the time.#its tiring going around in circles with her.my father is better because at least he admits when he doesnt have a reason for feeling some wa#also what got me. she said 'do you own research if you want!! but im right!!!'#yeahh not seeing anything about anything you just said. i think you made that up.#i have a theory that my mother secretly hates herself because she believes all women are weak and must serve strong men#and my father has so so much trauma and anxiety that he cant be that strong man#so now she feels like shes betraying her very biology when she has to step up.#and also because i am stronger than her now and my hair is long and far far denser than hers and i have a younger face#that she feels that im wasting my precious femininity that she could be using. does that make sense.#shes so miserable trapped in her idea of what makes a man and a woman what they are. once you stop caring about what makes someone somethin#you dont have to worry about anyone else.#im queer because i dont really feel that connection to biological and social ideas of gender that my parents seem to#never really have#im not gonna theorize 'ohh shed be happier nonbinary' or stuff like that because it is up to you and you alone to define who you are#if you spend your whole life trying to fit a box for the sake of fitting the box#then when would you have any space for self discovery#youve invented personality traits to go along with your box. now you can never ever change or grow as a person. congrats#and you know what? one day she will die. and that will be the end of that.#and i will live and i will probably shave my head a thousand times. and come up with new names#and new ways to be a better person that makes me feel happy#and i will dress like a boy because its all made up anyways. who cares.#and if you care? that much about what im wearing or how i look?#then thats your problem and i wont be responsible to maintain your happiness.#SORRY RANT OVER.#im just so flabbergasted. what a sad life someone can lead poisoned by jealously and reactive rhetoric.#tw homophobia#tw transphobes
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“bUt YoU dOnT lOoK dEpReSsEd”
Yeah and you don’t look like you have a headache! What’s ur point?
#mental health matters#mental illness#mental health#mental heath awareness#mental health visibility#depression#depression awareness#depression visibility#r u ok#there is no look for mental health#mental heath support#you matter#your are worth it#self love#take care of yourself#love yourself#don’t let others define you#they can’t see inside you head!
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I don’t want to lose arm fat I want a fat person to be honest about how they got stronger arms.
#Im not working out to lose weight I’m working out bc I want to lift#like the only thing I care about is bike and weights#and using a bike is self explanatory#weights is like#i want buff arms i don’t care about shit else#but every other vid is some nigga selling a protein shake#if anybody has any tips 🥺#my goal isn’t even to LOOK more defined I just want to carry more#atp imma buy weights and wing it idgaf
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Things I Want from the Next Ep of Only Friends
At least two scenes with Nick and Sand being friends. We didn't get enough, I want more of the two of them!!
Related, I kind of want a scene with Nick and Ray. I want to become weirdly close friends and both Boston and Sand finding a little weird (not in a jelous way, more in like I am not sure how I feel about this way).
The start of a storyline for Chuem and April (I have some ideas of possibilities)
Any hints about Top and Sand backstory (seriously I need answears!!!) @respectthepetty Looks like we will have to wait at least until the next episode or more to know why these two hate each other!!
SIDE NOTE: I have a new theory, what if they were both dating the same person for a while? Like Sand was in an open relationship and the person he was dating was also sleeping with Top??
Anything that can help me understand why Mew is willing to be be Top and ingore all the red flags. Seriously this man has avoided all relationship so far, why is Top special, why ignore all the signals that Top is not the one for him. Why Top???
#that's all i can think of so far#i am sure there will be more#this show as consumed my entaire self#only friends#only friends the series#ofts#the sand theory is because he seems to be wary of ray's friends who have sex weird realtionship#but i also believe him when he said he only sleep with people more then once if they are dating#him having being an open not clearly defined relationship and that person also being with top would explain their hatred#and the feeling we all get from sand that he knows this is a bad idea#because he has done it before#it would be even more interesting if the person sand had been dating had a crush on top#that would be a real oh my god i can't believe i am doing this a second time kind of situation#but it could be something else#it could also not be that deep#maybe it's just that he thinks he is an asshole#but i don't know#the comment of maybe you just don't know how to take care of what is yours kind of feels personal#and about more then just ray and mew#ITA Original
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the dark evil wizards have afflicted me with a hyperspecific interpretation of killuas "moral conflict" which leaves a lot of fan content that tries to engage with it unsatisfying. a wicked and foul hex indeed
#sometimes i feel mean for it too bc like on the surface whenever i try to articulate it. it feels like a Less Charitable reading of him#yk#but like im just being fr. i think people think killua gaf abt murder more than he rlly does. its why i cant get into the 99 version of him#& when i say that i mean the whole. feeling megaguilt over killing ppl and thinking Thats the reason why hes a terrible person#like thats his previous job. may as well have been a 9-5 he dont care. the self-hatred comes from ingroup trait prescription#the zoldycks manipulation is mostly about isolation & control so a lotta killuas issues are with social categorization and feeling powerful#at least to me yk its wayyy more about like. how the outgroup perceives him. more than any moral gripe with killing#he hates the alienation it makes him feel small and out of control. the only way he knew how to regain power was thru violence#and he re-encounters this issue when the needle starts acting up in front of ppl he cant just step on & violence stops even being an Option#most of killuas growth is learning that there are Other Options. other things that can & will make him feel better & wont get him shunned#likeeee this is most of why he likes gon so much at first. bc gon dont rlly gaf in a way that makes him part of the defined outgroup either#therefore he was super accessible to killua when he hadnt yet understood that making friends kinda means hes gonna have to conform a little#very little kid way of thinking. which works out cuz hes 11 lmfao#heliichats
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