#deeply deeply confusing
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the USA gets a lot of shit for not using the metric system and celsius like most of the rest of the world, but I think whatever Canada is doing is worse. distance and speed is measured in kilometers, but people's height is measured in feet and inches. food is measured in grams, but a person's weight is measured in pounds. the temperature outside is Celsius, but the temperature in your oven is Fahrenheit. and don't even get me started on how calendar dates are written.
#it's CHAOS#most countries use one or the other but canada decided ALL OF THE ABOVE#as an american living in canada it's been very confusing#i've had to learn celsius for weather purposes but my oven still uses fahrenheit#communicating height is easy but i still don't understand kilometers#the dates are really what gets me though#i've started the habit of just writing out the month instead of using the number#because literally everyone writes it differently#deeply deeply confusing
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dense, neutron star of a man. His weight fluctuates based off of the amount of sun hes been exposed to, and the amount of water ingested, so a very healthy kryptonian easily weighs around 350-400 lbs/ 158-181 kgs. Martha quickly traded in her lawn chairs for sturdy, solid wood, rocking chairs for the front porch as he got older, but Clark seems to be drawn to the flimsy lawn chairs like a moth to a flame.
(Hes prone to shouting for his Ma or Pa when hes scared awake, old habit hes never broke out of lol)
Bonus: a regular day for Bruce
#superbat#clark kent#superman#bruce wayne#batman#mine#my art#treating kryptonians like sponges a lil lol...#he drinks way more than he eats. weird plant man#despite bruce being a human wrecking ball it still shocks clark everytime hes picked up#like a huge dog confused by the concept of uppies#how could this happen....? i am so large...and powerful...did i mention Large...??#meanwhile Bruce bristles as soon as hes airborne against his will#he is aware he is pick-uppable despite his size (bc of his team) and it angers him deeply
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despite how you feel about the changes from the stream to the show, if you like or dislike them, i love how inherently hilarious the narrative path tlovm is taking regarding perc’ahlia is because a situationship would literally kill campaign percy and vex like how the internet would kill a small victorian child. they are NOT built for that
#their entire relationship is so deeply implied like they fall in LOVE with each other#they don’t just love each other they become friends; teammates; family; and over the course of 3+ years they fall so completely in love#it is the slowest burn to ever slow burn and it is so glorious#and most critically they really feel they would not be good for each other at first so they keep their distance from a relationship#and only once falling so entirely for the other do they start to admit the depths of that feeling#they would never. and i mean NEVER break the tension and jump to sex halfway through#those motherfuckers are so stubborn i SWEAR tal was about to kill percy himself without ever admitting he loved vex#laura bailey had to forcibly pull him back from the edge like literally what the fuuuck#and vex was never planning to confess either!! neither of them were!! that’s insane!!!#anyways. imagining them watching this alt universe of them fooling around before glintshore is soooo funny to me. they’d be so confused#critical role#cr1#tlovm#the legend of vox machina#tlovm spoilers#tlovm season 3#vox machina#percy de rolo#vex’ahlia#cr spoilers#lovm#legend of vox machina#perc'ahlia#percy x vex
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I gotta make my own food around here. No one helps in this kitchen
SY transmigrates early, system beta test or something, does the wandering cultivator thing for a few decades, realizes the strays he picked up have formed a sect and he's the leader and no he doesn't get a choice in the matter
In terms of most powerful cultivators, SY is #10 in the cultivation world, but his sect is seen very poorly because, well, it's made up of strays and he encourages any noble kids to go to HHP because he needs to save his resources for kids who need him
Yue Qi and Shen Jiu get picked up by one of SY's staples and brought in. Their potential is insane and after a little training and researching current events he's pretty sure this "Yue" and "Shen" belong in CQM.
But it's already been 3 years. The boys aren't interested in sex yet, but they have been mommy-wife beamed thoroughly and fight him when he tells them he's made special arrangements with the CQM sect leader to accept them
He pulls the whole "Don't you want to be strong?" Schtick and they are not happy, but they are children and easily carried by a cultivator of his caliber
Shen Jiu swears revenge and SY breathes a sigh of relief that things are finally back on track.
But he misses them and tries to lose himself in traveling and oh no, this poor demonic snake is injured! (Fully juiced up by TLJ zzl just took snake form to lick his wounds more safely bc he's in the human realm) Zzl is fully prepared to transform and eat SY whole, but instead sy is very very gentle, asks permission before touching and coaxes the injured Zzl to last in the warm inside of his arm within his sleeve.
Sadly, Zzl has duties to his lord once he's healed, but he'll be back for this cultivator. Blah blah, plot happens, SY scoops up baby bingy (and the washer woman) and plants them in his sect, intending to send LBH off to CQM at the appropriate time.
He realizes his interference might have made SJ less of an asshole in general, but he DID swear revenge so maybe that's the angle the abuse will take.
Joke's on him, the first thing YQY does when the Qing generation steps up is strong arm SY into an alliance marriage. Shen Jiu becomes first wife.
(YQY isn't legally married for political reasons, but as SJ explains while dragging him into the marital bed, they are a set)
Zzl actively seeks SY out for help with TLJ and while SY can't do anything about that, he fishes up a plot amulet that gives Zzl free shapeshifting.
Zzl insists marriage is the only way to repay SY (tlj's advice) and eventually SY caves.
Wife count: 3
LQG has never met SY but heard rumors about him being a celestial fairy or wherever, so he's concerned SJ is treating him poorly and follows SJ to his marital sect. He catches SY on the way out to hunt some great beast
Wife count: 4
#svsss#Shen Yuan#wehhh too tired#rest assured lbh and gyx join when they grow up#qqq thinks sy is trying to take over cqm and investigates#only to realize what's going on and sigh deeply#she forbids any other peak lords from meeting sy#yqy sqq and lqg agree. their husband's time is already short#sqh is full confused meltdown but also doesn't want to risk his neck meeting this sy guy
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being nonbinary in a world that refuses to acknowledge more than 2 genders is weird bc like. i've literally found myself thinking "what if i go on hormones so my parents misgender me but in a different way"
#just for variety. just to shake things up a bit. diversify my trauma portfolio#also it's weird for several hundred other reasons this is just what has been recently on my minds#also 'i don't necessarily want to present as a specific gender but i DO want people to be deeply confused about what they're looking at so'#I don't want to be MISgendered i want people to be so confused they give up even attempting pronouns#out of sheer psychological horror if nothing else#you've got neopronouns i've got NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!pronouns
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ever think about twelve being so sick of losing people, especially losing people because of their belief in him as a hero, like amy. so he strips off that mask and shows how cold and calculating he is willing to be with lives and he chooses a face that shows his age and stops hiding his danger behind a charming smile or a bow tie. he does it as a kindness, so Clara knows what she's getting into. and she does. and she gets into it anyway. and it makes him even more desperate not to lose her. so he breaks all of his own rules, everything he stood for because just once he didn't want to have to lose someone. he went to the end of space and time the long way round, he beat death and he betrayed the home he spent his life searching for to try save her. for once he chose what he wanted, her, over the universe.
and after all that, all he managed to do was make it so she lost him instead.
#something something death/loss is his constant companion#no matter how far he runs#or how desperate he becomes#also. i know her losing him also very much means he loses her#but my impression from his demeanour in the diner#compared to heaven sent#theres much less of a feeling of grief#more of a hole#hes confused#and can feel something missing#but hes not as deeply grieving as heaven sent#anyway.#going insane abt him.#and how he can never ever win#not really#squids bullshit#doctor who#dr who#twelfth doctor#12th doctor#peter capaldi#heaven sent#face the raven#hell bent#🌌#1️⃣2️⃣#clara oswald
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People who say Marius haters are just biased/haven’t read the books/simply don’t “get” his relationship w Armand are always a head scratcher bc then you read the books and you’re like well christ this is actually worse than I was expecting. Going into TVA like here I am ready to absorb the nuances of this dynamic. And then literally every consecutive moment is making it clear how badly Marius sucks
#I mean I’m not like confused about how people could be intrigued by their dynamic or could find Marius interesting#I get it. but also I think it’s pretty obvious how literally any random person could read that and be like#oh this guy sucks actually#or maybe I just have a deeply embedded (correct) reaction to annoying patronizing men#honestly an instinct more ppl could stand to have. the world would be a better place#armand#tva#tvc#marius
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Thank you not to Tamsyn Muir because I just had to read the first chapter of my independent reading book out loud in English and got the experience of reading the words “I didn’t think this was the time for dirty talks, but: choke me, Daddy” to my entire class.
I am never living this down
#on the bright side they are all now *deeply* confused as to what happened?#harrow the ninth#ianthe tridentarius#the locked tomb#tlt#gideon the ninth#htn#gtn#ntn#gideon nav#harrowhark nonagesimus#nona the ninth#ianthe the first
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Was thinking about how much of a normo I come across as irl, how I’ve felt a lil odd person out at their shows bc of being a bit older (29) and looking so aggressively normal, how generally confused people in my life would be if they knew about my d&p obsession, how thoroughly i mask weirder traits and essentially codeswitch to suit the mainstream, etc.
i feel kind of fish out of water when I imagine how all the people that populate my tumblr phandom ecosystem are likely presenting to the world irl (I.e. more visibly queer, counterculture, and so on). But then I think maybe the most visible phannies are the ones with the most curated, alt, deliberate daytoday lewks/style? So maybe what I’m picturing is off base? But then I’m also basing this off of what audiences look like in audience footage, m&gs, etc.
Sooooooo i would like to know… do you guys feel like you present as someone who may be Deeply Online and obsessed with two gay nerds from the internet? Or do you hide it and fly under the radar, masking as a total normy and living a double life?
(To clarify I don’t mean you’re like out and about wearing the fringes boob sweatshirt lol I more mean vibes and overall lewk yk?)
#does this make any sense?#not to say we’re all abnormal freaks over here but also…. we lowkey are freaks lol#like this is not typical behavior#obvs when I say dressing alt and counterculture I’m aware phannies aren’t like a predominantly goth community or some extreme aesthetic#or what have you#I just mean that this is obviously not a super mainstream interest nor are they mainstream creators anymore#(arguably they never were. they were big but not mainstream. I think people entrenched in internet#and YouTube and phandom can become a bit tunnelvisioned and#and forget that even at their peak Dan and Phil were still#a niche interest and an unconventional one#but i digress)#basically I’m trying to figure out how many of us are also living double lives on here#I hope no one comes for my over this or it doesn’t get misconstrued#I just have like SUCH a normal job and so many people I know would be DEEPLY confused if they learned about this whole thing#and obviously there isn’t a clear binary of like normal vs. internet dwelling weirdo#and that we contain multitudes#and all things can be true simultaneously#I know I know I know you know that I know right?? but you also know what I mean right??#me yapping#dan and phil#phan
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i dont go on tiktok too often since I know my brain does the time blind, someone fucking tell me why my algo is serving me up doomed boston yaoi (damon/affleck) like the fuck
#genuinely forgot that the damon/affleck thing was SO prominent for SO long like#but I have a vivid fucking memory of thinking they were legit together after getting served up that one kimmel episode#on youtube where one of em snuck the other on by wearing one big suit from like TEN years ago#and getting deeply confused at the mention of wives#in any case i just finished a 9 hour shift at the restaurant how are yall doing
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So, my man gets kidnapped, tortured, and has his family threatened and remains cool, calm, and collected. He even goes as far as making copious amounts of sex jokes because ‘If I’m gonna die I’m going out on my terms.’
This has most likely never happened to a Goetia before. Remember, it’s almost impossible to kill a Goetia. Striker needed angelic weapons to hurt him. And my man shrugged his shoulders and squared up because he was not going to let his assassin see him weak.
But the other 99% of the time he’s on the verge of a mental breakdown.
Peak ‘anxious friend you want in a crisis’ energy. 10/10. Perfect neurodivergent rep. No notes.
#stolas#striker#helluva boss#I’m pretty sure if Blitz saw him respond to Striker’s torture with jokes about being a sub#He would have been very turned on#and deeply confused#like ‘how is this goofy man also this fucking awesome’#and ‘when can I mount him’
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Maura & Jane | Rizzoli & Isles 1x06
#rizzles#rizzlesedit#no really what even is this#this is flirting is what it is#outstanding heterosexual jane rizzoli definitely thinking about men while looking at maura like that#in my head maura is bisexual and she's trying to figure out if jane is actually straight or deeply closeted#and she's just confused because jane's mouth keeps saying i'm straight but none of her actions say that#jane rizzoli#maura isles#sasha alexander#angie harmon#affrizzles#rizzoli and isles: season 1#rizzoli and isles: 1x06
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You Dragon Age bitches have conditioned me into liking the silver fox necromancer. Congratulations. I don't even go here, but I am enjoying myself.
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If tumblr starts pushing algorithm-based “content” instead of just showing the damn blogs we follow we need to move to MySpace or something
#this was entirely predictable but deeply upsetting nonetheless#staff we don’t want New Features To Be Just Like Twitter#tumblr is not confusing or harder to use#it’s just DIFFERENT. THATS WHY WE’RE HERE
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Cardan was so Ken-in-Elfhame coded in The Cruel Prince, and the more I think about it the more it makes sense
#like tryna flirt the whole time but it backfires deeply😭😭#their arrogant phase until their “oh shit I’ve been doing everything wrong” moment#cardan greenbriar#the way Jude and Cardan are like a wicked version of barbs and Ken#the horror Barbie’s#not saying they’re the same characters#just the same blueprints#girl who’s fucking confused about life & man who can’t figure out a woman for the life of him
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There are some things that all troopers know Nat born's will never understand.
All the troopers grew up in a world where perfection was the standard and anything less resulted in death. Where individuality was a crime and being anything more than just another number was a danger, Where saying the wrong thing in front of the wrong person could get you killed.
All troopers know this, but post Kamino the Guards have had it drilled into them all over again. If they want to survive In the Senate they have to fall back on the lessons they learned on Kamino.
The Corries know that there are some things that nat born's will never understand. Things that Nat born's shouldn't understand.
So no one in the guard quite knows how to feel about the strange fallout of the Shiney squad's Jetti Cadets apparent discovery of the Guards position on Courcant.
It starts small, the guard notices that the boy stops being weird about the fact that most of the Corries don't use their names, when asked, the boys. "It's because I know that you have them now." raises more questions than answers, because apparently the boy just figured out that they used their designation numbers around the Senate because their names were a secret on his own. He also seemed to get an unreasonable amount of joy from the fact that all the clones chose their own names.
If it has stopped there then it probably wouldn't be so weird, but it didn't. From sneaking in extra medical supplies and food, (actual food, not just ration bars) when he discovered that 'depur' was cutting their budget for stuff that they needed to function, to the way he seemed to intrinsically understand their need for secrecy, and their reasoning for it. "secrets keep us safe." Without anyone seemingly telling him.
They all agreed that they weren't gonna ask about how the boy had managed to rangle several senators around to the truth of the situation and his point of view with only a few words to one of them. A point of view that not only had them working on trooper sentient rights bills, but also had them aiding in his more under the table helping.
At first it was weird and confusing, both because this kid was a nat born, and because how did a Jetti Cadet develop this kind of understanding, he was a child. It took them a while to connect the dots, Even as the boy started unconsciously dropping hints.
At first it was that weird little nickname he had for the Senate and Senators, in a language that even the most nerdy of Corries didn't seem to understand. They weren't sure what a Depur was, but apparently it applied to the Senate and was probably not a good thing.
The next clue was the stories, because as Anakin spent more time with the guard, becoming more of a Vod'ika than a Jetti Commander and subsequently beginning to learn more and more about the secrets that they kept from the rest of the Senate.
As the boy learnt about the lighter side of the inner workings of the guard, and how to speak the clones particular brand of Mando'a, the guards began to learn stories about Ekkreth, Leia and Ar Amu, stories about secret plots and tricking the The infamous Depur in ways that resulted in the freedom of those he enslaved.
About secret Languages, Tzai, Jappor snippets and secret rituals. About the ways one could steal back some control from the Masters in ways that they would never even notice. About things that the boy claimed that all Slaves should know, lessons that would help keep them safe from their Masters. A term that by now the guards suspended was not referring to the kind the Jedi had.
By the time the boy causally mentioned that he and his mother had been enslaved prior to him being taken to the temple, the Guards already had a pretty decent picture of the situation.
The fact that the boy had been adopting them into his own culture right under their noses had been vastly more surprising. He'd been a little awkward when he'd admitted it. Saying that he knew that they were sort of Mando'ade, but they could be Amavikka too if they wanted.
And sure, maybe it was a little dark that part of the reason the boy spent so much time in the barracks was because it felt familiar, but also this kid cared about every single one of them, to the point where he apparently sees them as family.
Well it really was no wonder that it was agreed that the entire guard would do just about anything for their Ad'ika. Including possibly stopping said Ad'ika from doing the same for them. (Bloody Skywalkers)
#ani and the corries au#padawan anakin#anakin skywalker#the courscant guard#child anakin skywalker#tatooine slave culture#of the fialleril veriaty#i had this thought in the middle of the night#its a long one but i had to write it anyway#Anakin is an Honorary Vode#and he also has several hundred siblings/new family members#they both adopted each other#tw slavery#mostly referenced but its there#the two way culture exchange is my favorite part of this au#mandalorian culture#Clone trooper culture#Corrie guard culture#the image of the Corries kind of mixing the clone brand of there mandalorian heratage with Anakin's Amavikan stories#The guards randomly weaving Amatakka in to there conversations and leaving there other siblings deeply confused#because Anakin never said they couldn't tell the other Troopers about what he told them#but he did say that they should use there own judgement#so they do
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