#deeply deeply confusing

[waitineedaname]

the USA gets a lot of shit for not using the metric system and celsius like most of the rest of the world, but I think whatever Canada is doing is worse. distance and speed is measured in kilometers, but people's height is measured in feet and inches. food is measured in grams, but a person's weight is measured in pounds. the temperature outside is Celsius, but the temperature in your oven is Fahrenheit. and don't even get me started on how calendar dates are written.

[monkesupreme]

dense, neutron star of a man. His weight fluctuates based off of the amount of sun hes been exposed to, and the amount of water ingested, so a very healthy kryptonian easily weighs around 350-400 lbs/ 158-181 kgs. Martha quickly traded in her lawn chairs for sturdy, solid wood, rocking chairs for the front porch as he got older, but Clark seems to be drawn to the flimsy lawn chairs like a moth to a flame.

(Hes prone to shouting for his Ma or Pa when hes scared awake, old habit hes never broke out of lol)

Bonus: a regular day for Bruce

[hyunjining]

i’ve never talked about 911 on here but i have to say this. why the fuck did they do that? and why are the cast all acting like that. what’s going on.

[andi-o-geyser]

despite how you feel about the changes from the stream to the show, if you like or dislike them, i love how inherently hilarious the narrative path tlovm is taking regarding perc’ahlia is because a situationship would literally kill campaign percy and vex like how the internet would kill a small victorian child. they are NOT built for that

[tk-duveraun]

I gotta make my own food around here. No one helps in this kitchen

SY transmigrates early, system beta test or something, does the wandering cultivator thing for a few decades, realizes the strays he picked up have formed a sect and he's the leader and no he doesn't get a choice in the matter

In terms of most powerful cultivators, SY is #10 in the cultivation world, but his sect is seen very poorly because, well, it's made up of strays and he encourages any noble kids to go to HHP because he needs to save his resources for kids who need him

Yue Qi and Shen Jiu get picked up by one of SY's staples and brought in. Their potential is insane and after a little training and researching current events he's pretty sure this "Yue" and "Shen" belong in CQM.

But it's already been 3 years. The boys aren't interested in sex yet, but they have been mommy-wife beamed thoroughly and fight him when he tells them he's made special arrangements with the CQM sect leader to accept them

He pulls the whole "Don't you want to be strong?" Schtick and they are not happy, but they are children and easily carried by a cultivator of his caliber

Shen Jiu swears revenge and SY breathes a sigh of relief that things are finally back on track.

But he misses them and tries to lose himself in traveling and oh no, this poor demonic snake is injured! (Fully juiced up by TLJ zzl just took snake form to lick his wounds more safely bc he's in the human realm) Zzl is fully prepared to transform and eat SY whole, but instead sy is very very gentle, asks permission before touching and coaxes the injured Zzl to last in the warm inside of his arm within his sleeve.

Sadly, Zzl has duties to his lord once he's healed, but he'll be back for this cultivator. Blah blah, plot happens, SY scoops up baby bingy (and the washer woman) and plants them in his sect, intending to send LBH off to CQM at the appropriate time.

He realizes his interference might have made SJ less of an asshole in general, but he DID swear revenge so maybe that's the angle the abuse will take.

Joke's on him, the first thing YQY does when the Qing generation steps up is strong arm SY into an alliance marriage. Shen Jiu becomes first wife.

(YQY isn't legally married for political reasons, but as SJ explains while dragging him into the marital bed, they are a set)

Zzl actively seeks SY out for help with TLJ and while SY can't do anything about that, he fishes up a plot amulet that gives Zzl free shapeshifting.

Zzl insists marriage is the only way to repay SY (tlj's advice) and eventually SY caves.

Wife count: 3

LQG has never met SY but heard rumors about him being a celestial fairy or wherever, so he's concerned SJ is treating him poorly and follows SJ to his marital sect. He catches SY on the way out to hunt some great beast

Wife count: 4

[skeleton-squid-b0y]

ever think about twelve being so sick of losing people, especially losing people because of their belief in him as a hero, like amy. so he strips off that mask and shows how cold and calculating he is willing to be with lives and he chooses a face that shows his age and stops hiding his danger behind a charming smile or a bow tie. he does it as a kindness, so Clara knows what she's getting into. and she does. and she gets into it anyway. and it makes him even more desperate not to lose her. so he breaks all of his own rules, everything he stood for because just once he didn't want to have to lose someone. he went to the end of space and time the long way round, he beat death and he betrayed the home he spent his life searching for to try save her. for once he chose what he wanted, her, over the universe.

and after all that, all he managed to do was make it so she lost him instead.

[wisdomcaster]

PADMUND TINY LITTLE BABY I WOULD DIE FOR YOU

[deadchannelradio]

jayrose is so funny to me because rose wants to fuck jason soo bad and its like shes throwing herself at a brick wall that like every couple of months suddenly and inexplicably becomes a window. It must be so confusing like what is the secret code what am i doing differently. Supposedly this (doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result) is the definition of insanity. BUT SOMETIMES SHE DOES GET A DIFFERENT RESULT

[over-bi-the-wayside]

Thank you not to Tamsyn Muir because I just had to read the first chapter of my independent reading book out loud in English and got the experience of reading the words “I didn’t think this was the time for dirty talks, but: choke me, Daddy” to my entire class.

I am never living this down

[bitchslapblastoids]

Was thinking about how much of a normo I come across as irl, how I’ve felt a lil odd person out at their shows bc of being a bit older (29) and looking so aggressively normal, how generally confused people in my life would be if they knew about my d&p obsession, how thoroughly i mask weirder traits and essentially codeswitch to suit the mainstream, etc.

i feel kind of fish out of water when I imagine how all the people that populate my tumblr phandom ecosystem are likely presenting to the world irl (I.e. more visibly queer, counterculture, and so on). But then I think maybe the most visible phannies are the ones with the most curated, alt, deliberate daytoday lewks/style? So maybe what I’m picturing is off base? But then I’m also basing this off of what audiences look like in audience footage, m&gs, etc.

Sooooooo i would like to know… do you guys feel like you present as someone who may be Deeply Online and obsessed with two gay nerds from the internet? Or do you hide it and fly under the radar, masking as a total normy and living a double life?

(To clarify I don’t mean you’re like out and about wearing the fringes boob sweatshirt lol I more mean vibes and overall lewk yk?)

[chick-it-out]

How do you feel about being called a dude? (For complimenting you reasons)

im dude (90s lesbian edition)

[willyhoos]

the way amy and tails just... run past metal sonic as he collapses. i'm losing my mind. he's just an object to them. he's just a threat to be neutralized. they have no idea.

amy yelling out "i can't let *MY* sonic get away!" as she skips past his body

THAT *IS* YOUR SONIC!!!! THAT'S YOUR SOULMATE!! TAILS, THAT'S YOUR BIG BROTHER!!!!!! HE'S COLLAPSED ON THE GROUND!!!!!!!!!

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

i dont go on tiktok too often since I know my brain does the time blind, someone fucking tell me why my algo is serving me up doomed boston yaoi (damon/affleck) like the fuck

[leifyposting]

it’s 1am and i’m supposed to be asleep but instead i am here on tumblr to tell you that this:

IS A CRIME

this is a CRIME i say!!

what do you MEAN there is no established “kaeya is protective of jean” tag?? that’s their whole dynamic!

who was it who took over her duties when she was sick? who was it who stepped up as acting acting grand master when she was on vacation? who was it who told the traveler to give her their full support? he looks out for her in every way he can!

like i understand kaeya is a little baby boy. i get it. he is my baby boy as well and i love to make people protective of him. but c’mon team at some point we need to let jean get woobified as well

thank you for coming to my ted talk now i’m off to write kaeya being protective of jean

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

Do you think Jake and/or Tom would like Captain America Winter Soldier?

Jake: On the plus side, there was a lot of really interesting commentary in that movie. All the stuff with the U.S. trying to justify itself by presenting the Soviets as inhuman monsters, while also hiring Nazi intelligence officers to teach them Nazi science, was so cool. And upsetting, but also cool!

On the minus side, they didn't show Falcon flying nearly enough. Also they should've stuck closer to the comics with Bucky's story. Like, I get why the movie makes the Red Room German and has them zap Bucky to change his personality. But the comic book story is so much more on theme! Bucky is this ultra-patriotic American soldier, then he loses his memory in an explosion, and then the Red Room tells him he's a Soviet soldier... and he immediately flips to being ultra-patriotic for the USSR, without his personality or ideals changing at all. It's creepy and nifty and way more interesting than him getting his brains fried with what some stupid Hollywood director thinks electro-shock therapy is.

Tom: So look. I may have missed some things while texting during the boring parts. But. Bucky came back from the dead? Then Zola came back from the dead? Then Nick Fury came back from the dead? Then Crossbones came back from the dead? I know this was a superhero movie, but for fuck's sake. At some point I was expecting the guys Cap shot to start popping back up 10 seconds later like nothing happened.

Also, was it just me or were parts of it, like, super homoerotic?

[awkwardandeccentric]

So, my man gets kidnapped, tortured, and has his family threatened and remains cool, calm, and collected. He even goes as far as making copious amounts of sex jokes because ‘If I’m gonna die I’m going out on my terms.’

This has most likely never happened to a Goetia before. Remember, it’s almost impossible to kill a Goetia. Striker needed angelic weapons to hurt him. And my man shrugged his shoulders and squared up because he was not going to let his assassin see him weak.

But the other 99% of the time he’s on the verge of a mental breakdown.

Peak ‘anxious friend you want in a crisis’ energy. 10/10. Perfect neurodivergent rep. No notes.