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The Emotional Entities
#dc characters#emotional spectrum#dc comics#green lantern comics#dc#dc aliens#red lantern#orange lantern#yellow lantern#green lantern#blue lantern#indigo tribe#star sapphire#ultraviolet corps#black lantern#white lantern#dc cosmic entities#rainbow#fan art#fanart
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It's been three days and i am STILL thinking about the phantom stranger's introduction in the spectre (2001). Like christ
#dc#the phantom stranger#SURE IS A GUY#also i love that he alternates between cosmic entity and offering to play candyland with helen its very fun#but seriously the colors the stars the shadows???? it just looks GOOD#the spectre (2001)#also i love the non airbrushed art so much like the colorist it doing phenomenal work
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Dani ends up deciding to keep the obviously misinformed clones and teach them their rights. The JL quakes in fear as a group of teens they’d cowed into obedience via threats of inherent wickedness suddenly are free to do as they wish.
Dani is hunted by the JL
So dani was traveling around the infinite realms and came across a universe that she and danny would LOVE
Their are super heros, and clones and wizards, and alians
Dani send danny hlthe location of the universe with the caption:THE WORLD OF HEROS AND ALIANS WHICH WILL YOU MEET FIRST
Danny texted her back a voice massage of his screaming thw word alians
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Do dani was exploring this new universe wjen she saw asshole.1 berating a teenager about how he's not fit for this life
The asshole.2 chimes in and AGREES with asshole.1, at this point the kid looks upset
and dani could understand teenagers in the superhero business is not the best(she asked) and sometimes tough love is what it takes so she was going to leave
Then she heard asshole.1 say" clones should just be terminated to save everyone problems like this"...
No...dani didnt hold back in teaching asshole.1 a lesson in clone rights via: trial by fist
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But now 3 months later she decided to ask the assholes what they want and why they keep harassing her
She didnt expect a rant about how an unsupervised meta(and a clone asshole.1(whos name is superman WTF is super about him))
Then they all had a meeting about her IN front of her
The options ranger from finding her original to termination to imprisonment to forcing her to be a superhero
They eventually decided to make her a superhero in training...
These people are IDIOTS, if you dont trush her why put her WITH A TEAM, why not just let her leave, the most she did was get payback for the insensitive shit superman was saying but the sheer notion she was a clone was enough to FOECE her into a life she dosent want...
Oh hell no
So when the JL and clones in the background came up to tell her that they decided to give her a chance at "redemption"
She looked then in the eyes, sniled a too sharp smile said:no
Then she screamed
PAPA
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The next thing anyone knowes is the watchtower is in an unknown location with a person that looked scarily similar to the unknown clone
And then he said
WHY DO YOU HAVE MY DAUGHTER
#danny phantom#dani’s just like: :d papa!#hello correctly placed aggression#dc x dp#dani phantom#Now Danny has just all of these new kids and he loves them#a confusion of identity means that most of the team assumes that Danny is married to the cosmic entity they met earlier#They do nothing to correct them
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One of the things that I have with my backstory of the Endless relates to my take on the 'chaos and pain' mentioned in A Winter's Tale:
And to the Source Wall, and how that bit of DC cosmology interacts with the rest, as well as Death's role as 'the one who defines and trumps all existence' (there's a phrase that might need to be written out of the English language).
In a metaphysical sense the Source Wall is the 'Fourth Wall' in the Morrison approach but I dislike everything Grant Morrison does with that. I view it as an Iron Curtain ringing the DCU and a means to entrap lesser-powered hostile entities and to fence the *real* wolves out.
Death leaving her function for that time shattered the elements she does to hold Reality together, meaning the entities sleeping within the wall, a few of them, woke up. And in that time a few of the wolves, to speak, penned out by the wall got loose and got in and started having a merry old time.
Hence Death gets her first task to repair this thing and re-solder it back together. And in the process it also established one of the fundamental realities she does not least by consciously refusing to dwell on it. Her presence holds her functions cohesively together, in a setting where so many beings are, deep within them, ultimately living beings (including the very literal stars themselves).
The Source, incidentally, is also the Presence and the being of Christianity (mostly, with a smattering of Jewish and Islamic elements) in question, from whom the New God chieftain Highfather nominally draws powers the comics keep forgetting he has to fluff Darkseid. How that connects to the wall is a thing that's had a few dozen explanations, really.
This is not canonical, the nature of the 'chaos' is never entirely explained and that works perfectly for canon as it's a backstory that doesn't need an in depth explanation to work. For stories that center on Death as the protagonist instead of Dream it gives the decision she made, which in my view would be one of the hinges of her own identity and self-perception not least from the one time we hear her speak in her own voice in that one story, actual tangible results at the level mortals would register.
And it is that kind of result that also led to the Parliament of Stars in the first place, because the one Endless that really did leave her job in the time before the rules set limits on how much damage that could do broke reality in the process. It left lasting scars and memories on those entities old enough to know it happened and to set those rules.
Death refusing to attend the Parliament at all is why she gets saddled with being the sole person to repair the Wall, in a case of 'you refused to attend the thing caused by the thing you broke, then you get to clean up your own mess you made alone'.
#death of the endless#sandman fanfic#my backstory for said fanfics#Death leaving as per the comics (which is the background I use here and she downplays it in the show dialogue) broke reality#it broke rather completely in point of fact#as she briefly left the DC multiverse entirely she didn't see the full extent of the chaos and has little real idea how bad it really got#but the consequences echo and in my stories at least THIS is what created those rules the Endless follow#Death neatly ignoring them and not being bound by them when she's the reason they exist in the first place well....#that is among the reasons that a lot of the cosmic entities at her scale do not like her#it is also intended to be a flaw and one of the ways in which the actual character is more complex than the pedestal Dream has her on
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A DC X DP IDEA # 36
X
Imagine dis…
No this is not the app-related prompt…
I had just introduced my youngest brother to the original Ben 10 and worked our way to the latest to show him what he was missing, so when I saw that episode…
It immediately went to Danny…
…
Danny was falling, a normal Wednesday for us readers but not normal for our resident ghost boy.
To cut the flashback short, he had just been pushed by Clockwork, to where you ask he didn’t know.
It had been a while since he had permanently entered the Realms to learn to become a king and an Ancient. An Ancient of what you ask, Space, he was a newly formed which made the other Ancients namely Undergrowth, Frostbite, Vortex, and so on…
They were ecstatic as it had been a while since they met a new Ancient in the making, thus leading him to be pushed by CW to a space for him to not only practice his powers as an Ancient but also practice his newly formed title can help him heal his two packages. Namely, Ellie and Dan previously inhabited a clone body made by Vlad but due to its imperfections led to an early melting form. To gain a stronger body that can wind-stand their ever-growing powers, they both needed to grow into a body aka letting Danny incubate them like some sort of MPREG situation that he accidentally saw Dash’s notebook containing his fantasy writing about him and Phantom, it was a very dark day that was, it could use some work but the fact that he improved due to his sister’s tutoring, he doesn’t know what to feel.
Now he found himself in the middle of nothing with both cores in between inside himself. At first, he didn’t know what to do, the word space kept floating in his mind so stars? He asked himself, and so the first stars came forth. He was hesitant of course, usually whenever he had to use new powers usually under duress or even sometimes instinctively so now he had the time to explore his newfound powers he didn’t know where to start.
But slowly he let his instinct control his actions creating, with a flick of his writs galaxies formed, a single blink black holes were formed, a twitch here Pulsar were made, and so on… Each move and each breath made way to a new formation creating the former vast emptiness into a thriving space life with various life forms that have come first in the race of evolution. They first stayed within the confinements of their homes and in time they began reaching for the stars.
Throughout the years Danny also began to change, Danny, in his new form, is an ethereal being with enormous power. His skin is a deep, inky black that resembles the immensity of space, with constellations and galaxies quietly dancing across it. His eyes, unlike his former look, he has now customary pitch-black voids, gleaming a vivid, intense emerald that exudes alien intensity. These penetrating green eyes appear to reflect the force of the universe, continually moving and pulsing as if they hold the secrets of existence themselves.
White accents run throughout his physique like celestial ribbons, following his limbs, torso, and face. These streaks shine like stardust, with a faint glow reminiscent of a faraway nebula. The highlights are flowing, almost as if they are shifting and moving like stars in the night sky, creating a captivating contrast against his body's deep black color. His silhouette, while humanoid, seems almost unreal—tall, imposing, and continuously emitting the faint hum of cosmic power.
Danny Phantom—now known as Alien X dubbed by the Green Lanterns who were lucky enough to witness him at the rare times he ever so twitched—floated serenely in space, his visage as unreadable as it had always been. The once-human ghost-boy had evolved into one of the universe's most powerful entities, capable of altering reality with a single thought.
During the thousands of millennia that he spent his time crafting and perfecting his new powers came with a very heavy headache. In all the time that he had spent filling the space, he had gathered enough energy for the two to create new bodies that could accommodate their growing powers, both Dan and Ellie kept on arguing inside his head about what they wanted to look like, like some sort of demented sims game. Always arguing which would look great on them, how this piece fits them better than the other.. and so on…
…
Did you ever have the instinctive feeling that something new is happening somewhere that you can't explain? Today was that day. The silent space around him was abruptly filled with the wailing of two babies. Danny had given birth, causing shockwaves throughout the universe. Alien X, as the Lanterns dubbed him, was not intended to change or reproduce. Yet here he was, cradling two small, glowing children in his arms, their bodies moving between colors and shapes, a clear indication of their limitless potential.
And the relief of Danny as the two finally settled on a form and agreed on something.
The Lantern Corps was the first to notice. The Guardians of the Universe had long feared Alien X's might, and now, with two offspring whose talents remained unknown, they were on high alert. Every Lantern, from the enraged Red Lanterns to the hope-filled Blue Lanterns, was summoned. The stakes were too high; the children had the potential to become the universe's greatest protectors or its most terrifying adversaries.
Hal Jordan headed the Green Lantern Corps, his emerald light shining through the blackness of space as he interacted with his fellow colored Lanterns as the Green Lanterns' primary representative.
Trouble had already arrived. Darkseid, the dictatorial ruler of Apokolips, and Trigon, the demonic conqueror of universes, have established an unusual alliance. Even beings of enormous strength found the promise of possessing the power to modify reality too appealing. They each coveted one of the offspring, knowing that having even one would give them an advantage over the entire cosmos.
The Lanterns fought bravely, their united lights creating a stunning display of force. Hal solicited every favor and ally he could get. Star Sapphire, Sinestro, and even Larfleeze, the ruthless Orange Lantern, heeded the summons. The battle was intense, with cosmic energy crackling across the starry sky. However, for each wave of adversaries, they vanquished, more appeared, drawn by the irresistible power and potential of the 2 new offspring of Alien X.
As the conflict continued, the Lanterns beheld something they had never seen before. Alien X moved. Danny, who had seemed unconcerned by the mayhem surrounding him, switched his attention to the fight. His normally expressionless face softened as he stared at his children, who were now cooing in his arms, unaware of the battle raging on top of his own hands.
Danny's palm began to glow, and to the surprise of all the Lanterns present, his fingers curled into a protective ball around the infants. The difference was slight yet profound. Alien X was operating independently, free of the never-ending internal argument that had before crippled him. His hands, capable of wiping out entire galaxies, were now a barrier, protecting his children from the evil that loomed over them.
Now, both enemies and heroes are trapped together within Alien X’s hands as they all watch in fascination as two beings are now being formed before their very eyes.
…
PS: If someone out there wants to continue or make a fic about this you are free to do so, don’t forget to tag me though.
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Things to do with Jack and Maddie without them being abusive
As someone who actually likes Jack and Maddie as characters (I'm a fervent shipper of Maddie/Jack/Vlad), it's a real bummer to see so many people out there deciding that for their DPxDC AUs that Jack and Maddie are abusive, when that really doesn't represent how they are in canon. Now I fully acknowledge that doing this can be a very useful tool for telling certain types of stories, and if you want to make a story about recovering from abuse and finding a new found family, all the more power to you for that! But for any other type of story where them being abusive isn't necessary for the backstory of the story you want to tell... It's just a bummer to do that, y'know? If you don't want to tell a story with Jack and Maddie in it, that's entirely fine! I'm not asking you to. But there are ways to get rid of them without making them abusive or dying. Of the two, I personally would prefer them dying (I just like the story potential of that, especially as far as Vlad is concerned). But there are plenty of easy things to do with them to keep them out of the story that don't require them being abusive or dead! So I'm here to give a list of things that can happen to them (that have precedent within either Danny Phantom itself or the DC universe) that keep them out of the story that don't require much explanation as well as some other ideas for what you can do with them if you have no idea what to do with them otherwise.
Lots of ideas under the cut! (Feel free to take what you want. As always, credit is appreciated, but not necessary. But I would love to see what you do with it!)
If you need them permanently absent so that Danny can get adopted
Fell into the Ghost Zone and cannot be found.
They are gone for whatever reason and Jazz is currently Danny's legal guardian (she's 18 or older and is therefore a legal adult).
While in the Ghost Zone, they accidentally traveled through time/got transported somewhere where they can't get home easily.
They got severely Joker gassed and are in medical care. (This is actually what happened to Duke's parents!)
They got severely Scarecrow gassed and are in medical care.
Went insane for some supervillain-related reason and are now missing/in medical care.
They were kidnapped by a villain for some reason.
They were kidnapped by a villain and are currently in a lotus-eaters simulation and therefore don't even know that they've gone missing.
Abducted by aliens.
They got wrapped up in some supervillain bullshit and now have amnesia and are unable to recognize Danny and Jazz.
They got magicked into something that can't take care of Danny and Jazz.
They were experimented on and are now incapable of taking care of Danny and Jazz.
Some cosmic entity did a whoopsie that effected Jack and Maddie and now they're in a condition/situation where they cannot take care of Danny and Jazz.
Got arrested and are in jail for some reason.
Were arrested and sent to jail for a long time. Have since joined Task Force X/the Suicide Squad for lienency.
Got hit by a stray Zeta-Beam and are now on some alien planet.
They got teleported somehow. We aren't certain about the details.
They fell into a hole to another world.
They no-clipped out of their normal reality.
Stranded with no way home.
They somehow ended up on a different planet. They are just hanging out with Space Cabbie now, who is just having a ROUGH day and can't find Earth for whatever reason.
Inducted into a Lantern Corps and are VERY busy because of it!
Coma.
Effected by a debilitating illness/disease/condition that makes them incapable of taking care of others.
They were forced to go undercover for some reason and therefore vanished. (Letting their kids know is optional)
They were forced to go undercover for some reason and were forced to fake their deaths.
They died, but came back to life. Danny has not been informed of this.
They got possessed by a superhero or supervillain who just wandered off with their bodies.
They got separated following a disaster and haven't been able to find each other again.
They've been retconned to hell and back again to the point where no one is entirely certain where they are, what they're doing, or even if they're alive anymore. Don't worry about it! Only mention them when it's relevant and the rest of the time we aren't going to bother explaining what's going on with them. If they are mentioned, accounts of where they are and what's going on with them are contradictory.
They're around, but will go unseen throughout this story
Any of the situations in the previous section, but it only happened to one of the parents, and the other is just too busy working and taking care of the kids by themselves.
The same as previous, but they also moved to Gotham.
Retcon things so that the events of Danny Phantom actually happened in Gotham City all along. (Maybe Amity Park is like... A suburb in the greater Gotham area.)
They went on vacation/were hired for a job that would take them away from home. They left Danny and Jazz to be taken care of by Vlad. Vlad is an asshole, so they ran away from him.
They went on vacation/were hired for a job that would take them away from home, but now that Jazz is over 18, she's been left in charge.
Put into Witness Protection by the government/the Guys in White.
Danny and friends have graduated from high school and are now legal adults, perhaps in college.
Danny's whole family moved to Gotham City. They're just at home/working during the events of this story.
Jack and Maddie have been hired to do some work with the Justice League and need to be away from home for an extended period of time. They have left a member of the Justice League to take care of Danny and Jazz in the meantime.
Fieldtrip/school trip to Gotham City.
Danny is old and responsible enough that Jack and Maddie trust Danny (and/or Jazz) to travel on their own. His parents are just a call away if he needs help.
Jack and Maddie are separated for whatever reason (one went missing/one is working abroad/they are divorced/one died) and the other moved to Gotham and is taking care of the kids in the meantime, but is busy and so will not appear.
Something happened to Fenton Works and the family needs to temporarily stay somewhere else while the problem with Fenton Works is sorted.
The family was driven out of town and they ran off to Gotham to escape the angry mob. (Or at least to wait until things cool down again.)
Jack or Maddie are able to work remotely and so they've moved to Gotham to do so. The kids came along/are visiting.
Jack and/or Maddie were hired for temporary work in Gotham and decided to bring the kids along.
One family member was taken to Arkham Asylum. They moved to Gotham to be closer.
Jazz went to Gotham for college. Danny is visiting.
Danny is sent to Gotham/Arkham for specialized health reasons.
Jack and Maddie have gotten in contact with a specialist that lives in Gotham and are visiting for work-related reasons.
They are on vacation in Gotham and brought the kids along. Danny and Jazz have been let off the leash to go where they want while Jack and Maddie do touristy stuff.
Visiting family/family friends living in Gotham.
They were passing through but are now unable to leave. (Bonus points if it's a No Man's Land situation.)
They were passing through, but were robbed. Jack and Maddie are dealing with the robbery stuff where Danny is off somewhere else.
They were just passing through, but Maddie and Jack got SEVERELY distracted by something and have run off to who knows where!
They are traveling with Vlad and expected Vlad to take care of and watch the kids!
Danny was abducted to Gotham.
Danny accidently ended up in Gotham somehow.
Danny somehow got transported/teleported to Gotham.
Doing an educational trip/apprenticeship/internship over in Gotham.
Danny ran away impulsively.
Some villain threatened Danny's family and forced him to run away from home.
Danny has revealed his secret to his parents, and while they might worry about Danny being a vigilante, believe in and trust Danny to do the right thing and allow him to do what he feels that he must to protect people.
The same as above, but Vlad also came out and is supervising.
They died.
I cannot understate the sheer JUICY storytelling potential that you can have by killing Jack and Maddie off! We already know how it might effect people and events from what we see in The Ultimate Enemy, but there really is limitless potential in terms of ways to twist, turn, and play with things to have different outcomes! Additionally, Jack and Maddie being genuinely good parents that die protecting Danny and Jazz offers lots of ways for Bruce to relate to Danny and Jazz! (He decided to become Batman so that no one would have to face what he did ever again... And he failed...) And the way that they die can offer some lovely different flavors of angst, coping mechanisms, motovations, and learning to deal with their loss. So here are some ideas for how to kill them off!
The universe exploded again, and when it was put back together, Jack and Maddie ceased to exist in current canon continuity. (This happens more often than you'd think.)
Vlad Wins.
They were killed in an apocalypse-level event.
They were killed in the crossfire of some superhero/supervillain fight.
They were taken by some villain. They were killed before the heroes could arrive.
They were killed in a random act of violence/crime. (Much like Batman's backstory. Do this to gain extra points from Bruce.)
Died in prison/after joining the Suicide Squad.
Gang violence.
Any of the previous but Gotham is just THAT dangerous!
Same as any gassing or supervillain plan, but they died instead of being missing or in medical care.
Got transported to a place where they died very far away from home.
They just died suddenly or because of an accident. It happens sometimes.
Things to note
Believe it or not, but your parents can still be in your life AND you can join the Batfamily AT THE SAME TIME! :D
Examples:
Barbra Gordon is very much in the Batfamily and both of her parents are alive and well. She's a very important part of the family, and in the comics, it is not uncommon to see her calling up her dad and talking to him! They'll even call each other if they need help with something. This does not take away from the fatherly role Bruce often has in her life. (She can have 2 dads and good for her for that!)
When Tim initially became Robin, his parents were alive and well. They would later die because comic writers are just like that, but being an orphan without loving parents in your life is not a prerequisite to being Robin.
Duke's parents are also alive! They are under the effects of Joker toxin, but they are alive, and if they ever find a cure for it, I imagine that they would be more than happy to have Duke back in their lives!
Terry from Batman Beyond is not an orphan and was taken under Bruce's wing to be the next Batman! Terry is even going to inherit a fair amount of Bruce's wealth for deciding to take on the responsibility of being Batman. But while his dad did die, his mom is still alive and well over the course of the series! And he has a little brother too! Terry may still be a teenager, but he is a bit of a breadwinner for his household while also still being an important part of Bruce's family. (He is often someone who helps Bruce take care of himself.)
But if the story you truly want to explore requires being adopted specifically... Well... You don't have to be a kid to be adopted! Jack and Maddie can still raise Danny and Jazz into adults and Bruce is able to adopt them later if he wants, once they have been well and established in his family! Hell, you don't even have to wait! As long as Bruce asks permission from Jack and Maddie, they can be alive AND he can adopt Danny! There is more than one way to be in a family, you know! And sometimes it takes a village! And really, would Jack and Maddie really object to Danny being adopted by billionaire Bruce Wayne, especially if Danny really is enjoying his time being a part of his family and if Bruce has been an absolutely lovely person to them whenever he visits?
So I hope that you're able to take some inspiration from all of this for your own stories! If you need some elaboration on what I mean with some of these, or want to ask who could be responsible for some of these and how, feel free to drop on by and send me an ask! I would be more than happy to go into some more detail about these! Happy writing!
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I need to read this right now.
DC has decided that in their RWBY Crossover? Alfred Pennyworth is now a God! ….Good choice!
#Batman#alfred pennyworth#rwby dc#why hell he IS A GODDAMN GOD#Alfred is like Cthulhu: Tentacles and a Cosmic Entity#not even Salem can defeat Alfred xD
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Chapter 26 - I've Loved Everything About You That Hurts
Series Masterlist
Author's Note: They’re insane because I’ll try to write a chapter with no sex and they end up fucking, and then I try to do the sex in less words and now it’s emotional.
Chapter Title from G.I.N.A.S.F.S by Fall Out Boy
Word Count: 25k
Chapter Summary/Warnings: The team drives to DC for a meeting with Singer. Usual warnings, plus some extra smut and average No Love Lost angst.
Tags: Soldier Boy/Supe!Female Reader, canon divergence, enemies to friends to lovers, canon divergence, much smut (p in v, oral f receiving, fingering, squirting) fluff, emotional angst, established relationship
Read on A03!
Chapter 25 - Chapter 27
Ben was not the brains. And he was fucking fine with that. He was the muscle, and he was goddamn good at it. Because while She was stronger than he was—She was stronger and brighter and more vital than the fucking sun—she shouldn’t have blood on her hands. Her hands weren’t fucking meant to be covered in blood. They were meant to tap in a smooth, unyielding pattern against every surface, and turn the pages of books, and hold Ben’s face as she smiled at him. She was meant to fucking smile, and only be near blood to sit with Ben as he washed it off himself.
She kept letting it stain her skin. She kept taking fucking bullets meant for others and covering herself in the mud that pussies like Homelander pushed her into. And that’s what Ben was here for. He was now certain that he wasn’t here for fame or glory or money, he was here to move in perfect fucking time with the woman he loved. To listen to Her giggle and mumble and snort, and give her the fucking world. To dance with Her in the kitchen, and joke with her about fucking everything, and keep his arm around her during dinner as She gave him a secret look that meant I love you, Benjamin, you grump. He was supposed to watch baseball as She frowned at the screen, turning his hand over in hers as she tried to follow the game. He was meant to hold onto the easier, better things—the warm, well-fueled light that inflated in his chest when Ryan hugged at him after training, or the chuckle he couldn’t stop from escaping his body when She pouted at him about something stupid, or the way She moaned when he fucked her into the mattress—and hack and claw his way through the worse parts.
Ben was meant to be the only person in the fucking world who did the dirty work for Her. She’d done enough, and even though he believed her more and more when she told him I’m okay, Ben would do everything in his fucking power to keep her okay. He knew he couldn’t stop Her from running into traffic, because she was fast and stubborn and still didn’t care if She got hit. But he’d jump in front of the oncoming car, and continue to make her understand that he fucking cared. Ben would never fucking recover if She got hit. And if all he could do was tell Her I fucking love you, stop thinking you’re weak and expendable when I fucking love you and adore you and need you, and then run into traffic with Her, he’d do it. Ben was meant to fucking defend Her from everything that haunted her at night, and he understood that now. That he’d never chase away the ghosts, and She’d never chase away his, but they could really easily fucking kill them together. If they were together, those fucking pussy ghosts didn’t stand a goddamn chance.
So Ben was the muscle, in order to make sure that She didn’t have to be. It was another thing for him to do for Her, when She’d made everything so much more beautiful just by fucking existing near him, and fixing all his messes, and loving him. Still somehow fucking loving him, because Ben was almost goddamn certain some cosmic entity had made a clerical error and sent him the most perfect woman in history, instead of leaving him alone. Ben thought he was supposed to be, mostly, alone. Making empty promises to women he knew he didn’t really want, and to keep fucking moving until it was enough.
It hadn’t been enough. It had never been fucking enough.
But he’d rested for one goddamn second—his head held against Her body, the most awful aching fucking pain he’d ever goddamn felt consuming him like a storm—and it had been good. She’d hummed to him like she loved him, and She fucking did, and stayed. He’d rested, and it had been enough.
And now he knew that the fantasy he’d created—where life was so fucking happy because She was happy—wasn’t something he’d allow to be a fantasy. He couldn’t control anything about Her, but he could keep her happy. And if Her nightmares were of blood, he’d never let her see fucking blood again. He’d hide everything that was blue—if they had a son, the kid would have to just fucking deal with green—and shoot out whatever fucking ceiling fans made her cry. He’d drive her everywhere, half because he was over a hundred and had never seen someone speed like She did, and half because she was afraid of heights, and shouldn’t have to use a single goddamn plane. He’d yell at whoever was in charge of bridges until they built one to Rome, and the rest of their fucking lives would be happy.
That was a life he wanted to live. Where he was resting with Her, and they were both happy. And Ben would fucking choke on blood and dirt and mud until it was a reality.
Which is why he was losing his fucking mind as they entered that part of this war where it wasn’t about muscle anymore. It was about careful moves and well chosen words, and it was the only goddamn battle Ben couldn’t fight for Her. He wasn’t fucking stupid, but he wasn’t even fucking close to understanding whatever the hell went on in Her perfect, clever, insufferably brilliant brain. He knew how She thought—because he knew Her and loved Her and cared for Her—so when something happened that made her eyes grow glazed and her breathing become mechanical, Ben knew he had to hold her until she stopped thinking the only stupid thoughts she was capable of thinking.
That she was bad, when she was actually the only truly good thing in the world.
That she was weak, when she fucking wasn’t.
That she didn’t matter, when she mattered more than fucking anything, and sometimes it stabbed him deep in his arteries that she still didn’t get that.
Ben knew how to chase those thoughts away. He was smart enough to know how to worship and tend to her, and to know when she just needed him at her side.
But Christ, he wasn’t smart enough for this shit. For the CIA and Singer and Edgar and Sage messes. This was Her territory. And Ben could stand at her side, but that was the only fucking way he could help, and it was driving him out of his goddamn mind.
What was worse, though, was that She was fucking confused. And that’s how Ben knew they were fucked.
Because not a single goddamn person could figure out what the fuck the keys were for.
As they’d left the safe house, Neuman had stopped them. In reality, Neuman had stopped Her and Ben had simply fucking refused to leave them alone. He’d received several irritated glares from Neuman, but She’d moved her free hand to hold Ben’s forearm—in a silent request to keep his hand in Her’s, to stay at her side all the goddamn time—so Ben had stood tall and proud next to her, keeping her safe. Just by being there, like She’d told him to. Neuman could look fucking pissed at him all she wanted, Ben wasn’t going anywhere.
“You were at Red River,” Neuman had watched them carefully, arms crossed as she blocked their way down the stairs. “Did you get it?”
There had been a pause as She examined Neuman, before finally nodding, her tone flat and bored. “Yeah, we did. We’ll get it to Edgar-“
“What is it?”
She’d blinked at Neuman. “Does it matter?”
“Of course it matters,” Neuman had said Her name with an eye roll, and Ben had felt something bloody and zealous tense in his body. “Edgar raised me to be a lot smarter than just blindly trusting him, so I want to know what it is.”
“And if I don’t tell you?”
“Oh, come on.” Neuman’s voice had been vaguely amused, giving Her a flat look. “We both know you’re going to tell me. You trust me enough to bring Ashley here, and whatever it is I bet you’re debating whether or not you should give it to Edgar. I can help you decide.”
Ben hadn’t been debating shit. It was keys. Who gave a fuck about keys. As far as he had known, they’d toss the keys to Edgar, settling the debt, and figure out what the fuck to do with the V.
And that was another fucking reason why She was the brains. She’d studied Neuman—fingers tapping on Ben’s arm with lips pulled between her teeth—and found a conclusion that satisfied her enough to reach into Ben’s pocket and pull out the keys, holding them up for Neuman to see.
“Keys.” She’d jingled them with a shrug. “Got an idea what they’re to?”
Neuman hadn’t. Neuman had just looked fucking confused, and helped with goddamn nothing. Neuman had stared at the keys, bluntly stated that she didn’t know what they could possibly unlock, all of Edgar’s property assets were seized and all of Vought’s buildings used electronic locks, and suggested they figure out what they were for before giving them to Edgar. And—based on Her drawn, too-neutral face and the spark of indigence in her eyes—She’d already known all that, and had no intention of giving Edgar a goddamn thing until they knew what the hell was going on.
And now they were even more goddamn late to get back to the compound, and make the drive to DC. She’d volunteered to drive them back, and Ben, Hughie, and Kimiko had exchanged silent looks of not a fucking chance in hell.
“I’ll be safe-“
Ben had drawled Her name, cutting off her protests as Hughie and Kimiko moved to the front of the car. “You will not be fucking safe. You’re worse than Butcher, and if you wreck his car we’re going to have to deal with his bitching for the rest of our goddamn lives.”
“But-“
He’d tugged Her into the back seat, holding her half on his lap and kissing her pretty, pouting mouth until she relaxed in his arms. We’re going to be fucking fine. If Singer gets all goddamn pissed about us being late, he can shove it in his dick hole.
A small smile had played on her lips, still pressed against Ben’s. Gross.
Her heartbeat had remained steady under Ben’s hands for the rest of the—perfectly fucking legal and safe—drive, and when they’d stepped off the elevator they’d been greeted by MM’s assessing glare and scowl.
“What the hell took you so long.”
“Um,” Hughie had glanced back to Her—tucked under Ben’s arm—with a stutter of Her name and pallid face. “Do you want to-“
“You know what,” MM had run a hand over his face, shaking his head. “I don’t care. Kimiko, you and Frenchie are holding down the fort with Ryan. You three,” he’d turned his glare to Her, Ben, and Hughie. “Get ten minutes to pack. We’re rolling out in fifteen no matter who the fuck is in the limo.”
She’d blinked. “The limo-“
“Van’s still scrapped,” MM had muttered. “And we can’t fit six grown ass adults in a minivan or Butcher’s car. We’re renting a limo.”
Ben had no complaints about that. He didn’t have to wear a damn seatbelt in a limo, and it was a very opportune and appropriate place to hold Her in his lap as they drove without groans and pointed glares from their prude fucking team. If a life of luxury had taught him anything, it was that limos were meant to hold beautiful women, and he’d be fucking damned if he didn’t hold his beautiful woman—the most beautiful, perfect fucking woman who he fucking loved—when he was given the opportunity. So he’d let Her pull them back to their apartment, changing as she stuffed their shit into a suitcase, and taken over when her heartbeat became too fucking fast and her glare at their clothing became almost violent.
“I’ve got it,” Ben had walked up behind Her, wrapping his arms over Her shoulders and kissing Her neck until she let out a breath that didn’t sound fucking mechanical. “Don’t lose your damn mind, Sunshine, I can fucking pack.”
She’d nodded slowly, tilting her head back to meet his eyes. “Thank you.”
“Don’t,” he’d muttered, leaning down to kiss under Her jaw, and felt something light and perfectly fucking mind-numbing wrap around his brain like a crown as she made a high, breathy sound. “Go get changed, darling.”
She’d let Ben guide her to the dresser, and begun to hum under her breath as she’d changed.
“Rainbow Connection.” He’d grunted as she’d returned to his side, hanging off Ben’s arms as She surveyed his packing job.
Her smile had been all content, easy joy, and Ben whole fucking heart had skipped. Then she’d started to actually fucking sing, and he’d genuinely considered just letting the team leave without them. Her voice was like honey and summer rain and something peaceful and strong that Ben hadn’t heard before Her, and never wanted to stop hearing for the rest of his fucking life. The only thing that kept him from staying here, where She was safe and happy and the whole goddamn world was just color and light and her perfect fucking smile, was that she’d kick his fucking ass if they missed this meeting.
They’d had five more minutes, though. And that was more than enough time for Ben to spin Her around until she was dizzy and giggling, swaying in his arms to the instruments that weren’t really there as She sang, looking at him with such infinite and impossibly fucking ceaseless love.
This was the fucking shit worth fighting for. This was where Ben was goddamn supposed to be. And even as he’d kept his arm over Her shoulder—letting Her drag the suitcase behind them and grabbing his shield before they left the apartment—Ben didn’t fucking want to go. He wanted to stay right here, and let this ungrateful world that kept fucking hurting Her crumble.
But She wouldn’t let that happen, and part of why Ben loved Her—there were countless fucking reasons, and the world would probably be swallowed by the Sun before he’d finished naming them all—was because she loved fucking everything. She had a goddamn unfathomable amount of love to hold in Her body, and most of it might be for Ben, but it still spilled into everywhere that Ben could see. Music sounded better, and jokes were funnier, and water quenched his thirst faster when she was around. The only thing Ben remained at her side was hungry. For more of this fucking beauty, and whatever bit of love She’d spare for him. And as long as She kept loving the world, he’d defend it for her. If Ben had a goddamn say in anything, the world wouldn’t fall to ruin until She told him to burn it.
And She wouldn’t. So Ben had to kiss Her head and mutter that he loved Her—just in case she hadn’t heard him the million other times he’d said it—and stay watchful and dependent at her side. Walk with her to the elevator, out to the parking lot, and over to a sleek, black limo that already had the engine fucking running.
“Bout fucking time,” Butcher had grunted, jerking his head to the limo doors as they approached. “We were two bleedin seconds from leavin you twats behind. I’m drivin, which means I’m in fuckin charge, and that means no hanky panky in my bloody limo.”
She’d wrinkled Her nose as Ben opened the door. “Hanky Panky? What are you, a fucking grandmother? You sound older than he does.”
Butcher had scoffed as She’d bumped Ben’s shoulder. “Shut it, Love, least I know how fuckin wifi works.”
“I know how wifi works,” Ben had grumbled into Her ear as Butcher turned away. “You put in the numbers and the radio shows you the internet.”
“That’s,” She’d paused, tilting Her head as Ben pulled her into the limo. “Not wrong. Good work, Pretty Boy.”
He’d grunted, shifting them until She was on his lap, not sparing a goddamn glance to the rest of the team. “I didn’t fucking miss the old shit, brat. I’m not-“
“Fucking old,” She’d grinned at him, voice dropping into that dog shit impression of Ben that She’d only gotten worse at. “You know better than any damn pussy fucker, Sunshine, that I am not old.”
He’d rolled his eyes, kissing at the base of Her neck, and MM had let out a very loud cough that almost made Ben bash his brains in, because it caused Her beautiful, perfect face to twist away from him.
“Sorry, MM-“
MM had cut Her off with a heavy, almost pained sigh. “It isn’t that shit. I mean, we’d all really appreciate if you toned it the fuck down for the drive, but I’ve given up on trying to stop you motherfuckers from humping like dogs in heat all the goddamn time.”
She’d flushed, and Ben had taken over. “The fuck do you want then-“
“The Cornucopia.” MM had looked between Ben and Her and Hughie with a raised brow. “What the hell is it.”
She’d reached into her jacket pocket, pulled out the keys, and tossed them across the limo to MM. He’d blinked at Her, she’d explained Red River as Ben added some very fucking helpful nods and Hughie jumped in with small, stupid details that didn’t seem like they mattered, but She’d thanked him for anyways.
And now, after a whole goddamn hour of sitting in the limo, they’d made no progress in figuring out what the fuck to do with the keys. Everyone had coughed up fifty dollars to Annie for Her bet of any item that’s not a bucket—Annie had forgiven Her debt, and Ben had taken Annie’s dish duty for two fucking months to make up for his own—and they’d passed them around the group for everyone to examine like they’d suddenly fucking have Vought Sex Dungeon engraved on the side.
“Maybe they’re to a storage unit?” Annie looked around the group, fidgeting with the keys in her hands, and MM shook his head.
“No, they’d have a label on them. And then we’d have to worry about-“
“What the fuck is in the storage unit.” She mumbled, leaning Her head back onto Ben’s shoulder. “I mean, no matter what those keys probably lead to the actual Cornucopia. It can’t just be keys.”
“But it’s different, right?” Hughie leaned forwards as he spoke, arms on his knees. “If it’s a storage unit, or a box, or, like, a whole building? And it matters that they’re keys, I mean that sort of, um, narrows it down.”
Ben frowned, opening his mouth to ask Hughie how the fuck that narrowed a goddamn thing down, when She squeeze his arm over her stomach.
A lot of Vought buildings don’t use physical keys, they use keycards. And those keys don’t look old, so it’s not a warehouse that just hasn’t been modernized.
Ben reached his hand up to tilt Her head back, moving her full attention from Hughie to him. What the fuck do you think it is.
I don’t know. She sighed, pulling Ben’s arms around her a little tighter. I mean, I have guesses, but-
What are they.
Ben could see Her teeth as they tugged at her lower lip, her fingers tapping against the back of his hand. They’re just theories, and none of them are concrete-
He grunted Her name in his head. Tell me your fucking theories.
They don’t-
If you say matter, I’ll crash the fucking car.
Grumpy. She gave him a fake pout, and Ben hauled her a little further up his chest, kissing the crook of Her neck.
Tell me. I won’t interrupt you, and you can talk them out. That always fucking helps you.
Her fingers stilled against him, and when Ben pulled back she was watching him with something so gentle and adoring in her eyes it nearly fucking knocked him out. He could feel the full fucking force of Her love, crashing into his body and making everything so good. There was a soft smile playing on Her face, and Ben didn’t understand it. That was the smile she gave him when he said something supportive to Ryan, or grumbled an agreement with Butcher, or exchanged short, curt nods with MM. It was the smile She gave him when he made her pancakes, or proved he’d been listening to Her rant about nothing, or she caught him humming one of her songs in the shower, and none of his scowling or protests could deter her teasing.
I love you, Benjamin. Her voice was almost whispering in his head, and she reached up to trace the lines of his face. I really love you.
I fucking know that-
No, you don’t. She brushed hair from Ben’s eyes, and let out a small sigh. I love you so, so much. I love you, Ben. I really fucking love you.
Something felt almost fucking radiant in Ben’s body. It wasn’t the nuke, because that felt violent and hateful and still fucking painful, even within Ben’s control. This was comfortable and open and so fucking painfully glorious it might drive him mad. It was so goddamn strange, and easy, and he’d felt it before but not quite like this. This felt like when he’d rested against Her, but without any of the pain or the lump of failure in his throat. So—though he still didn’t fully fucking understand what she meant, Ben did know She loved him and never fucking doubted it—he nodded, and dropped his face back to her neck. I love you too, Sunshine. Talk.
It could be an apartment or house that the feds missed. It’s likely Edgar’s and not Vought’s, because if it’s important enough to hide Vought would’ve already taken it. Sage would’ve taken it. Maybe it’s an incredibly well-kept secret, and Sage is looking for it, and that’s why Edgar wants it now. But if it’s that, it’s probably not a house, because what would Sage need with a house. I don’t think it’s going to be something small, because Cornucopia implies plenty, and Edgar isn’t someone who misuses words. My bet is on a warehouse that Edgar’s keeping a lot of shit in. Vanessa seemed worried about what we’d do with it, which makes me think it’s something dangerous. She turned Her head, resting it against Ben’s. But that’s all I have.
Ben rolled his eyes. Still a fuck ton more than everyone else.
Shut up. She whacked Ben’s arm lightly, and he could feel her smile brushing against his forehead. What’s your bet.
My money is on your fucking money, darling.
That’s very sweet, but not the slightest bit helpful.
Tough shit, I’m not changing my answer. Ben nipped at Her slightly, smirking at the small squeak that left her lips. You’re the smartest one here by a damn mile. Money on you is safe fucking money.
Love has made you stupid, Benjamin.
No. He drew back up, his grin unrestrained as he took in Her perfect, pretty face, and her sharp, amused eyes, and all Her fucking love and adoration for, and knew that all of it was fucking his. Ben got to have this. He loved Her like she deserved, so he got to be the one she looked at with a smile and watched like he was everything. Love has made me smart as fuck. Which is why I know to put money on you, beautiful. Because you’re always fucking right.
They were so fucking close, Ben’s breath passing into her mouth, and Christ, She was going to kill him. Her lips had parted slightly, her hands over Ben’s arms—holding them in their rightful place against Her—gripping him like she was going to fall down, and She wanted him. Her thighs were rubbing for friction against his body, and her heartbeat had picked up, and Ben was going to fuck Her in the back of the limo. Everyone else was just going to have to suck it the fuck up, because She fucking wanted Ben and he wasn’t capable of denying her anything.
Then MM said Her name, and Ben almost bit through this tongue at the way She squirmed above him and made his cock jump, and the way she was still holding onto him, and the fucking smell and feel of Her above him, and Christ he needed to fuck her-
“Catch,” MM grunted, and Ben grabbed the keys flying through the air before She even had time to react. “That wasn’t mean for you-“
“Shove it up your ass, MM.” Ben tucked the keys into Her pocket, holding MM’s glare. “What do you want.”
She pinched Ben’s arm. Rude, Benjamin-
He shouldn’t just fucking throw shit at you-
You throw things at me all the time-
No, I don’t, you throw shit at me all the damn time, because you’re fucking mean to me-
You’re invincible, Pretty Boy, I think you’ll survive some paper-
MM let out a loud, overdramatic cough. “If you can listen to me for five minutes, I’ll let you dumbasses brain-fuck each other all you want. Think you can make it five fucking minutes?”
Ben had no interest in making it five minutes, and She didn’t either. He’d shifted against Her, pressing himself into her ass, and her breath had hitched as her heart began to stumble in her chest. But She was too fucking kind and good and perfect, so She nodded, and MM continued.
“You have to keep those on you,” he said, voice firm and jaw set. “And no making any moves with them until we’re all on board, this could be dangerous. That goes for everyone!” MM raised his voice, glare turning to the front of the limo. “That means you, motherfucker. No stealing the keys and going all vigilante!”
Butcher snorted from the front. “I ain’t the one for you to worry about, Mate. If anyone’s goin fuckin rogue, it’s Bonnie and Clyde over there.”
“We’re not going to go rogue, Butcher.” She flipped off the divider between them and Butcher, a pretty glower on her face. “And if you try to steal the keys, I’ll burn your face off.”
“Fuckin shame, that’s my money maker-“
“Can we please not kill each other when there’s still two hours left of the drive?” Hughie had gone all fucking puppy-dog eyed—looking between Her and Butcher’s back like a whining child—and She gave him an apologetic smile.
“Sorry, Hughie.” She turned back to MM, and She needed to stop wiggling around on Ben’s lap or he’d go fucking insane. “Is that it?”
When MM nodded, She twisted back around, dropping Her head into Ben’s chest, and sighed. Ben let Her stay there as Hughie, Annie, and MM trailed off into a conversation he wasn’t paying attention to, tangling his fingers in Her hair and kneading at her skin. Her heartbeat was a soft, even hum in Her chest, and he didn’t need to feel Her fingers tapping on his back or hear the chew of her tongue to know She was thinking. He didn’t push it—waiting for Her to speak first—because She fit naturally against him, and nothing in him felt wrong, so She was okay. Just fucking thinking.
Benjamin?
He hummed Her name back, between their heads, and she exhaled against him.
We didn’t tell them about the V. The vial of it we found with the keys.
Ben paused, glancing over at their team. Do you want to.
I don’t know. I, Her arms around him tightened, and She looked up, meeting Ben’s eyes with a frown. I don’t want to give it to Edgar. I don’t trust whatever intentions he has with it. But I don’t want to make more supes. It’s fighting fire with fire, and it’s not- She cut herself off, eyes roaming Ben’s face like she’d find an answer there. It’s not fair.
None of this is fair-
I know, She sat up a little, hands moving to cup Ben’s jaw. I know this isn’t about fair. But it’s still not fucking fair. I know you asked for this, for the V, but I didn’t. No one else did. And that’s so fucking unfair. It’s so unfair, Ben, and I don’t, I mean. She took a long breath. You remember how much it hurt, I can’t do that to someone. Even for the mission.
He began to trace patterns on Her waist, studying her almost glossy, pleading eyes. She wasn’t spiraling—Her heartbeat was too steady—but she looked lost. Unsure and so fucking tired that it made Ben’s whole head heavy.
And he needed to help. Ben needed to make this fucking better for Her, whatever it goddamn took.
Do you know why I volunteered for the Vought trials.
She paused, tilting her head at him. To impress your dad, Butcher told me before we woke you up.
Yeah. Ben let out a dry chuckle, holding Her gaze. Did the cockfuck tell you if it worked?
He said it didn’t. Her fingers began to play with the hair of Ben’s beard as She frowned at him. Why?
Because I did this shit to myself, I made myself Soldier Boy, and it didn’t mean a goddamn thing. Everyone loved me, and nobody gave a fuck about me-
I give a fuck about you, She gave him a small, sweet, toothless smile, and Ben didn’t even fucking bother to stop himself from returning it.
If you’d let me talk, brat, Ben drawled between their heads, dropping his brow to Hers. I’m fucking getting there. I missed my own mother’s funeral because my father somehow managed to outlive her, and I didn’t want to see his old, ugly, evil fucking face. My whole goddamn life was about being Soldier Boy, I never had a single pussy fucker I trusted, and I wasn’t aging so I decided to just keep damn waiting until this proved worth something. And you, he squeezed his arms around her, brushing his lips against Hers in a slight, soft motion. Are worth something. I waited a fucking lifetime, and I found it.
She made a small, choked sound, and Her eyes on Ben’s were filled with all that love he could feel everywhere around him. In Her, and traded between their body, and making everything so fucking good.
I love you, Her voice was soft in his head, her hands holding Ben’s head against Hers. But I don’t-
Ben had to spell it out for Her. He’d expected that. The one fucking thing she never seemed to get was that She was the whole fucking world, and Ben would follow her everywhere. I love you. I fucking adore you, and it’s not fair that you’re cleaning up all the goddamn messes I helped make in your name, before I even fucking knew you.
In my-
I was Soldier Boy to make this shit worth something. Everything I did was for whatever the fuck would be worth something, and that’s you. I was just a fucking dumbass who did it wrong. Love has made me smarter, Sunshine, because I’m doing it right now, but I still did it fucking wrong before. And I made messes, and now the woman I love has to clean them up because none of this shit is fucking fair. That V is my V, that they made to make you, and that’s it. Butcher might end up with us, but it’s you and me. We can flush that V down the toilet, or throw it off a fucking building, but that’s it. It’s not fair for you to make that call, so we’re taking it off the goddamn table.
She was silent for a second, and when She spoke she was combing her fingers through Ben’s hair, mouth dropped in a soft frown. You didn’t make these messes, Ben.
Yeah I know, fucking Homelander-
No. She gave a small shake of her head. Not Homelander either. That's the worst part, I think. That all of this is so fucking unfair, and no one person can pay for it.
What the fuck are you talking about.
She sighed. I’m saying that I can’t blame anyone. That none of this is fair, and I can’t blame Homelander for all of it. Voguelbaum created him, and Stillwell enabled him, and-
I fucking helped in making him-
But they didn’t tell you to. And you didn’t make the system that he’s thrived in. You helped build it, to a degree, but not all of it. And I don’t blame you. I’ve told you that. I’ve never blamed you for how unfair this is, or what happened to me.
And I’ve told you that you fucking should-
But I don’t. She searched his eyes, her own almost pleading. I really don’t. I love you, Benjamin, and I don’t really care for Soldier Boy, but I haven’t ever blamed you for this. Even before you were my Ben, I never blamed you.
He still didn’t fucking understand Her. She should blame him. This shit was unfair, and they both knew that fair didn’t matter, but Ben would still never be properly fucking worthy of Her. He’d never make up for how he’d set in motion things that had goddamn hurt her. But She was still curled in his lap, calling him mine, and looking at him like he was worth something.
Why.
Do you know the Bhagavad Gita?
Ben gave Her a flat glare. You know goddamn well-
It’s Hindu scripture. And there’s a really famous passage that says “I am become death, shatterer of worlds.” It means the soldier isn’t responsible for the deaths of the war. You were, sort of, a soldier. And you did benefit, and you were a real fucking asshole, but you were willingly blind. You committed atrocious, and didn’t think twice, because that’s what soldiers are meant to do. You aren’t a victim, but these messes aren’t just yours. A lot of people helped you make them. Vought gave you compound V, and the government signed off on the trials, and your father told you that you were worthless and you wanted a way to prove him wrong. You were an unstable dick, but you didn’t tell them the solution was to make Homelander. And you didn’t raise Homelander, or tell him to hurt me. You’ve been one of the only people who’s tried to stop him from hurting me, and that’s why I don’t blame you. Many, many people contributed to this, and none of them have ever repented. You’re repenting, and this will always be fucking unfair, but it’s you and me. You’re not a soldier anymore. You’re fighting for people you care about instead of power or glory, and you’re trying to help me fix this, and I love you. And that’s what matters.
She was fucking perfect. Ben hadn’t followed half the damn words She passed down their connection, but he understood the gist. She was still too good, too kind, too fucking forgiving, and She loved him. This wasn’t fucking fair, but he was doing everything in his goddamn power to make it easier for Her, and she fucking loved him. Ben bumped Her nose with his, and a smile tugged at her lips.
Lot of smart fucking words to say you love me and don’t blame me.
Well, you weren’t fucking getting it, Pretty Boy. That’s not my fault. She pressed a light kiss to Ben’s check, humming against his beard. Thank you.
Don’t-
Nope. Thank you. I love you, and thank you.
Ben sighed, and let it the fuck go. He had a lifetime to finally get Her to stop fucking thanking him for things he was supposed to be doing. He was meant to love Her, and listen to her, and hold her like this, so she needed to stop fucking pretending it was some sort of labor he needed thanks for. But for now, as Her head dropped down to his shoulder and she buried her face in his neck—warm breath fanning over his skin, a light touch tracing over his bicep—Ben let this be enough. She—all by her goddamn self—was more than fucking enough, and so he dropped it.
I love you too. He muttered in Her head, something relaxing and blooming in his chest as she smiled against him. Whatever the hell you want to do with the V, we’ll do it. And my vote is flushing it down the goddamn toilet. You and I are strong enough to kick Homelander’s pussy dick into his asshole all by our goddamn selves.
Her nose wrinkled. Gross.
Shut up. He moved his hand to the back of her head, running his fingers through her hair until she was molded against him. You fucking love it.
I do. There was a moment of silence, Her fingers still tracing over Ben’s skin before resting against his chest. Ben?
He grunted, keeping his hand around her and against Her in steady patterns. Circles on her hips and hair wrapped between his fingers, her skin soft under his touch and heartbeat in an even rhythm Ben knew better than his own.
You’re worth something to me as well.
I know-
No. Let me finish. She pushed up on him, holding his gaze with an almost anguished intensity. You’re worth everything to me. You are everything to me. I love you and adore you and I give so many fucks about you it’s insane. You’re my whole life, Benjamin, now and after. And you make all of this worth something for me as well.
The radiant warmth was everywhere inside of him now, but it was fed by the ache. The way Her voice in his head was pleading, like she needed Ben to understand, and if he didn’t it might hurt her. The way Her hands were curled in his shirt as she held herself up��like she was forcing herself not to collapse against him—and her words were wrapping over Ben’s body and seeping in his skin, all of it born from Her love for him. And it all made the ache in him slide into his throat, and tug at his tongue to say a million fucking things he didn’t have words for.
Simple was easier. The only words that never failed to make Her smile, and set her heart back to an even rhythm. The only thing he fully knew how to be certain of in the entire goddamn universe.
I love you, Sunshine.
Her face split into a soft, gentle smile. I love you too, Benjamin.
She fucking loved him, and that was rooted so deeply inside of Ben that he’d never stray from it. It made him stronger, holding him in a place he knew and loved and wanted to defend. He pulled Her a little higher up his torso, dropping his head to top of her chest and just fucking living there. Where her heartbeat was the loudest, and everything felt fucking good.
They’d worry about all this shit later. They had a whole fucking day ahead of them to worry about Singer and Her stepfather, and Homelander and Mallory and Edgar. And they’d spent months that felt like lives worrying about all these fucking messes, and Ben had spent lives before that making them without ever resting, or feeling fucking satiated by it.
He was satiated here. Leaning into her, with Her legs wrapped around his body and her head resting over his. Her body was slumped over him, every hitched breath when Ben ran a hand up her thigh or traced down her spine brushing against Ben’s ear, and this felt right. This felt fucking right, and Ben didn’t think he’d felt something this plainly natural in his life. It kept amazing him—over and fucking over—how he’d spent his whole life tearing things apart when all he’d had to do was fucking wait. It had made it easier when She’d been away from him and asked him to just wait for Her, because he had a lifetime of goddamn practice waiting for Her already. Waiting for something that wasn’t fucking salvation—because She hadn’t fixed him or saved him, that was fucking stupid—but better.
She wasn’t a cure. She was too silently wrathful to be a cure, made of too many sharp, spiking parts that she cut off for others to consume for Her to be a cure. She wasn’t for others, she just didn’t know how not to be. She was something that was meant to be worshipped, that had been made into a fucking offering. Turned into something like a cure, but never able to do it right, because it’s not what she was supposed to be.
Cures were made for something deadly and diseased. And Ben wasn’t a fucking saint, but he wasn’t sick. He’d just been angry. He’d been furious and bitter and vigilant, so he’d made himself lonely half by choice and half by how vicious his bite was when he was wronged.
She bit too. She didn’t cower or maul or run. She just bit back, and Her bite was a match to his. Less brute force, but more targeted. Right into Ben’s neck, and feeding something in him he hadn’t known was hungry. So She wasn’t a fucking cure, because cures took things away. She’d made him more. Given him something he’d always wanted, and never known existed. And now Ben would always be hungry, but he’ll be satiated. He found purpose. He’d had waited his whole fucking life for purpose, and it was Her. This was a goddamn purpose, something he was meant to do and be and have and give.
Are you hungry?
Ben leaned back, meeting Her eyes with a frown. What.
I’m thinking about dinner. We’re staying in a hotel tonight, and the meeting with Singer isn’t until the morning, and I’m hungry.
She gave him a fake pout, and Ben seriously fucking considered throwing Butcher out of the car to get Her to a fucking McDonalds. She probably liked McDonalds, everyone fucking liked McDonalds, and she always ate Ben’s burgers, so it wasn’t like they’d get fucked by the menu.
Just in case, he asked, What do you want?
She hummed, her fingers tapping against Ben’s jaw. What do hotels usually have? Lobster? Do they have lobster?
Fancy hotels have lobster. And if this one doesn’t, I’ll find you some-
Ben. She gave him a flat look, even as Her love swept through him like a wildfire. Where are you going to find me lobster.
I don’t fucking know, the ocean-
We’re on a river, those don’t have lobsters.
Ben rolled his eyes. Fine, smartass, another restaurant-
They’d make you pay for that, Pretty Boy, and we’re broke. If you keep losing bets at this rate, you’ll be on dish duty until after we kill Homelander.
What the fuck else am I supposed to do, they won’t forgive my debts like they do yours-
Because you lose all the time. She shrugged, dropping Her brow to Ben’s as she smiled at him. And I cover you, when I have the money.
We should both have the fucking money. Ben’s hands gripped Her body against him, and she must have read his next thought on his face, because She frowned and shook her head.
Do not use the meeting with Singer to demand a pay raise, Benjamin. That’s not what it’s for.
It’s not a pay raise, my love, it’s a fucking union. You and I aren’t going to do more of their shit for them until they give us some goddamn money-
We both know we’re not going to unionize. She sighed, her breath passing into Ben’s m. We might not be legally dead anymore, but we’re still not CIA employees.
We should be-
You’d have to do an interview with Mallory. Amusement danced in Her eyes, a small smile playing on her lips. And they’d run a background check. You can’t even do a background check, Benjamin, your social security number is negative five.
Shut up. I am not fucking old, and we still need some goddamn money. I’ll tongue Butcher’s taint before I become these pussies fucking maid-
We’ll make money. She pressed a kiss to the corner of Ben’s mouth. If escorts don’t pan out, we can try birthday parties. I know a guy who has a very authentic Soldier Boy costume, and I think he’ll let me borrow it if I give him a blowjob.
Ben snorted. He’d let you borrow it if you asked him real pretty and made him a bagel, Sunshine, but I’m not doing fucking birthday parties-
You wouldn’t even have to talk. I’d stand behind a curtain, and I can say everything for you. The kids would never know the difference. She grinned as Her voice in Ben’s head dropped to that gravelly impression of him. Hi, I’m Soldier Boy. New York. Eagles. Baseball. Boobs. Don’t do crack, kids, do Benzedrine. Don’t wear blue, it’s a pussy color, wear green. And if you’re ever in a fight, go for the other guy’s dick. I’m a million fucking years old, and I sing Rainbow Connection in the shower when I think nobody can hear, and I know you can fucking hear me Sunshine, but you don’t goddamn count-
Ben buried his head in Her neck, sucking and biting that one spot until her words trailed off into a tiny whimper.
Brat.
Cunt. Her voice was soft and needy, and Ben smirked against Her, kissing a wet trail up her jaw and over her face. Ben-
I love you so fucking much, Sunshine. He kissed around her pretty, already open mouth, trailing his tongue over her lips. And if we didn’t have company, I’d fuck you right here.
Ben felt Her heartbeat pick up under his careful, firm touches, but she didn’t pull away. We get our own room tonight, She let out a small, breathy sigh as Ben deepened the kiss. If you can keep it in your pants for a little while longer, I’ll let you do whatever you want to me.
How much longer.
She pulls away from him slightly, reaching between their bodies to grab Her phone. She paused as she swiped at Her screen, looking up at Ben with a frown. We really need to get you another phone-
Later. How much longer until I get to fuck you.
She wrinkled her nose at him. Horny old man-
Needy fucking brat. Ben shifted Her above him, letting his half-hard cock push between Her thighs, gritting his teeth as her legs tightened around him. How much-
An hour. She dropped her phone back between their bodies, wrapping her arms around Ben’s neck and lowering her face so their cheeks brushed. Think you can make it?
Ben scoffed, moving one hand down to squeeze at Her ass and smirking at her soft squeak in his ear. I’ll manage, Sunshine.
He wasn’t going to manage. They fell into an easy silence, Her body curled over Ben’s and her hands playing thoughtlessly with the hair at the nape of his neck, and the longer they stayed like that the more he needed her. She still smelled like that flower shampoo, but there was grass lingering over it, and a third smell that invaded Ben’s senses and so clearly just fucking Her. It was like the goddamn apples in their apartment, and chocolate, and warm smoke and the fucking sun. Ben didn’t have a better way to put it, because really it was just fucking Her. Like an aphrodisiac or song that tugged on something in his brain and called him home. Back to Her, closer to Her, always with Her.
It probably fucking was Her. That piece of her that was alive inside of him, growing stronger and stronger the longer it stayed.
Ben had no fucking intention of letting it leave. If holding Her like this—sitting in complete goddamn silence and caring for every perfect piece of her in his arms and mind—was what this part of Her needed to thrive, he’d hold her like this forever. She lived in Ben because he was safe to her. She given this part of her to him—even if She hadn’t actually meant to—and he’d never fail Her and let it feel pain.
He fucking loved Her, and she was all around him in every fucking way but the one that was starting to strain at his pant, and that sense of her everywhere wasn’t doing him any favors to make it through the hour. He wanted to make that piece of Her light up inside him, watch her perfect, beautiful face grow blissfully relaxed and adoring as he worshiped Her. Prove to Her that he thought she was too fucking kind and good for anyone at all, but he’d never let Her be wrong about him. If She said that Ben was repenting, he’d do whatever trial was laid out before him to prove Her right.
But as much as he wanted to bury himself deep inside of Her and mutter praise he meant and promises he’d always fucking keep, the hum of Her heart was growing slower and softer, and Ben realized she’d fallen asleep. He could feel a small amount of drool on his neck—her hair tickling his nose and her grip on his neck becoming slack—and he couldn’t stop the small smile that crept over his face. She was fucking safe here, where Ben was allowed to touch her in small ways that made her hum in sleep against his skin. Where he could trace patterns on Her hips, keep a steady arm around her waist, and let a hand move slowly up her spine to tangle in her hair until she fell further into him was a content sigh. Ben kept his breathing even and slow, his eyes on the rest of their team in a warning of keep it the fuck down, or I’ll crack your head open, so nothing could disturb her sleep.
She didn’t have a single fucking nightmare. No smoke rose from Her body, and no distressed, strangled sounds escaped her mouth. Everything in Ben felt right and a little high, so he knew she was really, truly, really fucking good. And when the limo finally stopped and Butcher turned to address them from the front, Ben’s respect for their team fucking doubled as a chorus of hissed be quiets filled the limo.
Butcher scoffed. “She’s a big girl, she don’t need a nap-“
“Butcher,” MM whispered, his tone and expression venomous. “If you wake her up, I’m not going to stop Soldier Boy from killing you.”
“Oh, come off it, Mate-“
“She never sleeps well, you asshole,” Annie’s voice was hushed, her eyes turning to Ben’s. “When was the last time she had a real, full night of sleep?”
Ben couldn’t fucking remember. Even after she’d stopped taking the suppressants, she still woke up screaming and wrapped and fire and sobbing about fucking blood. She fell back asleep easier now, but Ben had received countless fucking burns across his arms and face as he held Her down, trying to bring her back to earth before she flew off the bed and burned right through the fucking roof. She always healed the twisted for him if they weren’t gone by morning, and Ben always fucked Her after to chase off any useless goddamn guilt in her eyes, but it kept happening. He didn’t know how to fix it, other than only staying, just like she’d asked.
Annie must have seen the clench of his jaw—images of Her perfect face empty and hollow and broken flashing in Ben’s brain, echoes of her screams ringing in his ears—because she turned back to Butcher with a glare. “You just have to lower your voice, Butcher. Don’t be a dick.”
Butcher’s attention darted to Her—still steadily asleep against Ben—and rolled his eyes as he dropped his voice. “We got four rooms, and all the lovey dovey cunts will be sharin.” Butcher threw keycards to MM and Ben, who caught their’s with ease, and Hughie, who made a small yelp as Annie’s arm shot out, catching it for him. “Meetin with Singer is at 8am, and we got to be there at 7. You lot will meet me here at 6, and I don’t want to see your sorry fuckin faces until then.”
Ben could live with that. It was a little past midnight, and six hours of sleep was a fuck ton more than She usually got, so he’d take it and rest at Her side until morning. He shifted Her in his arms—moving her carefully up his chest, looping one arm under her knees—and carried her out of the limo, into the back entrance of the hotel, and up the stairs. MM had grabbed their suitcase, and Ben gave him a silent, firm nod as MM pushed into their room.
A hand shot out before Ben could kick the door closed, and MM’s gaze bore into Ben’s skull, his voice low. “She okay?”
She would be. As long as Ben could do a goddamn thing about it, She’d be okay for the rest of her fucking life. “She’s good,” Ben grunted, glancing down to Her perfect, peaceful face, half smushed into his shoulder, hair falling over her eyes. So fucking beautiful, and happily where she belonged. “I’m taking care of her.”
He wasn’t sure why he said that. It certainly wasn’t for MM’s fucking approval, because the only person whose approval mattered was Hers. And Ben did take care of Her. He took very fucking good care of Her, because he fucking loved her, and she was the most important person in the world. And he sure as fuck didn’t need to say that he took care of Her, because he proved that he did in his every waking moment.
Even right fucking now Ben was carrying her to bed, holding Her like she was something holier than life—she was—and planning to stay at Her side all night. Wrap his arms around her and hold her in the dark, then march at her side in the morning to face whatever the hell Singer had ready for them. And then he’d figure out where they kept lobster in DC, and get her some. And that’s what fucking mattered. Showing Her she was good. Only saying he was taking care of her wouldn’t mean a goddamn thing if he didn’t keep doing it, over and over and over until they were the last people left in the world, and a long while after that.
But MM gave a short nod, and Ben realized that the man had just believed him. MM might not fully trust Ben—and if he was being completely fucking honest that was still an understandable call, Ben would shoot everyone in the fucking head if they became a threat to Her or Ryan—but he trusted Ben with this. With Her. He trusted that when Ben said she’s good, he was telling the truth.
And he was. With a muttered reminder from MM not to be late in the morning and the door closing—leaving Ben and Her alone, together with the nightlights of the city casting shadows over her sleeping features—She was happy. Content as Ben laid her down on the bed, keeping one hand on her thigh as he unzipped their suitcase. He found one of his softer shirts and—a little selfishly, but he couldn’t bring himself to feel bad or give a fuck because She wore his clothing all the goddamn time anyway—changed her into it. She shouldn’t sleep in fucking jeans or her bra, so Ben carefully stripped her down—every movement debilitate and slow and silent so as not to disturb or wake her—and pulled his shirt over her body, kissing her brow before sitting at the edge of their bed and trying to figure out how the fuck to get them food.
This wasn’t the same hotel as last time, but shit had always worked the same at every hotel in history, so Ben figured it out. He read the directory, called room service, and ordered everything.
“And, um,” a nervous, soft-voiced woman was on the other end of the line, listing off more shit for Ben to add to his list. “Would you like dessert, sir?”
“Of course I want fucking dessert-“
Don’t be mean to the hotel staff, Benjamin. Ben cut himself off as Her arms wrapped around his torso, and looked down to see her head in his lap, her face buried in his abdomen. They’re doing their best, and it’s late.
Ben sighed, letting his free hand wander into her hair, and grunted into the phone, “dessert is good. Add it.”
“Do you have anything in mind, or would you like, um, all of it too?”
Sunshine-
I’d like ice cream. She hummed against him, and Ben felt her soft smile against his body. Whatever flavor you want.
“Ice cream,” Ben muttered, his eyes locked on Her, tucked and resting against him, so fucking perfect. “Vanilla. Two of them.”
A small giggle escaped Her. You’re very predictable, Pretty Boy.
Shut the fuck up.
“That will come to,” Ben heard the lady on the other end swallow, and there was a moment of static silence on the phone. “$492. Are you sure-“
“Get me the fucking food lady, and I’ll give you a 20% tip.”
Ben had no idea how much that would be, but the woman seemed happy with it, because she gave him an eager agreement before hanging up the line.
“Food will be here soon,” Ben muttered Her name, and his heart might’ve stopped fucking working when she rolled over in his lap, a beautiful, sleepy expression on her perfect face. “You’re-“
“Don’t say tired, or I’ll punch you.” She grumbled, poking at Ben’s chest with a pout. “You’re not allowed to do that right now.”
“I didn’t do fucking shit-”
“You were going to,” she mumbled, face flushing. “You were going to make me go to sleep.”
“We both know,” Ben drawled, smirking as he traced his thumb over her lips. “That I can’t make you do anything, darling. You never fucking listen to me.”
She buried her face back into Ben’s body, words muffled against his skin. “Fuck you.”
“I did promise to.” He hummed, glancing at the red numbers on their bedside table, reading 12:49. “But you need fucking sleep. We’re moving real damn early tomorrow, and you-“
“How early?”
“Six.”
She sighed against him, and Ben felt the alarm of wrong. Something is very wrong, because She’s hurting and that’s the worst fucking thing in the universe.
He grunted Her name, pulling lightly at her hair. “Look at me.”
When She rolled fully onto her back—Her eyes not hollow, but glossed over and soft—she just watched him. Waited for Ben to speak, one of her hands reaching up to touch his jaw, the whole fucking world just them. Together.
“What’s wrong. And don’t say nothing-“
“I don’t want to go tomorrow.” She whispered, and Ben froze. She sounded so fucking tired, and it was wrapping around his head and dragging his body down. Down to Her, to soothe her, to touch her and fucking fix this. “I know we have to, but I don’t want to, Ben. I’m,” she took a heavy breath. “I don’t want to.”
“Then we fucking won’t.” He snapped. It was pretty goddamn simple. He’d steal them a car, and they’d drive home. The rest of the team could handle this, and that was fucking that-
“We need to.” She gave Ben a small, sad smile, and he felt like someone was fucking stabbing him. “You know we need to. I have to be there for this-“
“You don’t have to-“
“I do.” She sat up, twisting until their legs were tangled and she was leaning against him, holding Ben’s face in her hands. “I have to. I need to see him.”
Ben's arms wrapped around Her body as he scanned over her face. Only inches from his, so goddamn sad and tired, a so fucking beautiful. “Muller.”
She nodded, and Ben’s was going to break his teeth. For that pussies' own sake, Muller better be too much of a goddamn coward to show face tomorrow, or Ben would damn the consequences and kill him. V or no V, he was still someone that was fucking hurting Her. As She spoke her voice was too quiet, and her eyes looked so goddamn far away, and Ben felt fucking sick.
“He never,” She swallowed, and Ben remained silent. Right now his job was to fucking listen, and he was damn good at it. Rubbing circles on her lower back, holding whatever of her gaze she gave him, and watching her the whole time. “He never acknowledged I was dead. Or alive. Or anything.” She sighed, leaning her brow against Ben’s. “I don’t want to talk to him, Ben. I don’t want to hear what he believes.”
“Believes-“
“About me.” She mumbled, Her eyes closed and heartbeat not fast, but uneven. “What Homelander and Sage have said, what Annie’s said, and-“ She shook her head, nose brushing Ben’s. “Everything. All of it. What I’ve done, and what happened to me. Who I might be, if I’m a whore, or bitch, or liar, or traitor-”
Ben muttered Her name, waiting for her to look at him before he spoke. “You’re not any of that. He’s not your fucking family. He’s a worthless pussy, and if he believes the wrong shit it doesn’t change the goddamn truth.”
“I know. I know, it doesn’t, but-“
“No.” Ben moved at hand up, pulling one of Hers off his face as kissing her knuckles. “No fucking but-“
“Please,” Her voice was barely a breath, and Ben’s whole body hurt as he fell silent.“I’m not worried about Muller, Ben. I’m worried about my,” Her hand tangled in Ben’s, her grip like iron as she took a long breath. “I’m worried about my mom. He’s just an extension of her, and whatever he believes-”
She cut Herself off with a half-sob, and Ben let smoke curl between their fingers, not flinching away as heat started to burn his skin. He’d hold Her through this fall and catch Her at the end. He’d always fucking catch her, but he knew she had to fall first. Ben had to hear everything spiraling through her insane, perfect brain so he could get his words fucking right when it was his turn to speak.
“I,” She took a shaking breath, and there was something tight and curled in her throat that Ben could feel. “I know I shouldn’t care. It’s been years, and I shouldn’t care, and I’ve had worse things-“ She made another strangled noise, her heart bouncing around her ribs. “Worse things happen to me since. But it still hurts, everything hurts. She said I wasn’t strong enough to be alone, Homelander said I’m not strong enough, and I’m not, Ben, I’m not. I’m so tired. And I’m so sick of being tired, but I’m not, I’m not strong enough to just fucking be better-“
That was enough. Ben had all he fucking needed to pull Her back down, and he’d be damned if he let Her think for another fucking second that she wasn’t fucking everything.
“You don’t need to be fucking better, you are better.” Ben tilted his head up, her words falling into soft tears that made something flail around in his gut, and kissed the space between her eyes as he muttered against her skin. “No matter fucking what, you’re better. You’re not whatever the fuck they think you are. Any of them. They don’t know you, Sunshine, I fucking know you. And you’re smart and good and kind and beautiful and a goddamn powerful fucking problem and you’re perfect. You’re fucking perfect, so stop being stupid.”
She made a choked sound, fully falling against him, and as her arms wrapped around Ben’s neck all Her love bloomed in his body. It hurt, it fucking ripped him apart inside as she sobbed into him, shaking slightly in his hands and clinging to him like he was an anchor. Something holding Her together, that she trusted to keep her safe, and She fucking did. Because Ben folded his body over hers, and touched her right, and waited for this to pass. It always fucking passed, and they both knew it would return, but then they’d just wait it out together once more. Every single fucking thing would pass but them. She’d stay planted in Ben, covering everything in him and the world, and if they burned they’d burn together. And that was where the love in her made this pain worth it by a million fucking fold. Because this hurt—this killed Ben and lined cracks along his skull, twisting and rotting something in his heart—but then it passed, and everything was warm. Turning the rot to smoke, healing every crack, and spreading through Ben’s veins like a fucking drug. Like something sacred, that everyone chased but Ben got to have. That he’d somehow managed to earn, just by loving Her and caring for her and staying.
So when this passed, and Her breathing still ragged but her heart growing even, Her voice in Ben’s head was soft but not weak. She couldn’t be fucking weak if she tried. I’m sorry.
Before Ben could grunt between them for her to never fucking apologize, She looked up at him with a beautiful, full-lipped, toothless smile, her face glistening with evaporated tears.
What’s-
I don’t think this is how meeting the parents is supposed to go. I think we’re supposed to have dinner at an Olive Garden and not talk about Homelander at all.
Ben snorted, kissing the top of Her head. I don’t give fuck about Olive Garden-
That’s not very family-oriented of you, Benjamin-
And I don’t give a fuck about your parents. I care about you, Sunshine, and I have no fucking interest in impressing idiots pussies who don’t.
Her love was fucking infinite in Ben’s body, and nobody had ever fucking looked at him like that but Her. Like She believed him, but didn’t believe he was real. Would you, um, I mean I know we’ve been keeping Violet away from this, but after, my dad and my other siblings-
He grunted Her name between them, and a pretty flush covered her face. Whoever you want me to meet, I will. But if I think they’re being asshole cockheads, I’m not fucking standing for it. I love you, and nobody is allowed to tell you who the fuck you are-
You tell me who I am all the time, She gave him an amused look. You literally just told me who I was.
Ben rolled his eyes. That’s not the fucking same. I’m not a pussy dumb fuck talking out of my ass, you’re the love of my fucking life and you were being an idiot. You’re not weak, and I’m not going to let people who don’t goddamn know shit tell you that you are-
She kissed him, soft and sweet, her hands gliding up his chest to hold his jaw. Thanksgivings are going to be really awkward, if you call my family a bunch of fucking pussies the whole time.
Ben smirked against her. Good thing those pussies aren’t invited to our thanksgiving.
Who is-
Nobody. It’s going to be me, you, and a massive fucking sex marathon.
She giggled, and even though the sound was quiet, it was real. She was fucking happy, here, with Ben. Not even going to pretend we’ll invite our friends?
No. Ben twisted his face in half-mocked disgust. We’re going to need the entire goddamn turkey to ourselves, to make sure you have enough energy. I will not have you fucking tagging out before we get started.
All I hear, She pulled back, and that was Her full smile. Her wide, infinite smile that contained the whole universe and was made of something so fucking bright and vital Ben would never find anything like it if he tried. Is that you’re not denying they’re our friends.
Ben’s eyes narrowed. Impossibly clever, beautiful, perfect fucking woman, backing him into corners and knowing him too fucking well. He didn’t have an argument out of it, because if he said they weren’t she’d push it and win—something starting with our friends care about me, and ending with and you trust them with Ryan and I—and if he just agreed he’d never hear the goddamn end of it, so his only avenue was to roll her onto her back, leaving sloppy, wet kiss all over her face as she laughed and let out blissful sighs, muttering brat and fucking love you, Sunshine against her skin and down her throat right up until someone knocked on the door.
Her eyes grew comically wide as Ben dumped their order of food on the hotel table, her face falling into a plainly adorable gape as she looked up at him. “Did you order thanksgiving? I can’t eat all of this-“
“Then take whatever the fuck you want,” Ben looped his arm around Her waist, kissing the top of her head as she leaned onto his shoulder. “And I’ll eat whatever you don’t.”
She smiled at him, tilting her head to kiss his cheek, and hummed against him. “I can’t believe I’m in love with a dog.”
He scowled. “I am not a fucking dog-“
“You are, my love. You’re a massive fucking puppy, and I adore you.”
Ben is pretty goddamn sure his heart stopped working and then got jumpstarted within the same fucking millisecond. She’d tugged herself away from him—filling up one of the paper plates hotel services had brought up before shuffling back to the bed, waiting for Ben to join her with a patient, expectant gaze—and he had to make his feet move. He’d wanted to stay there for the rest of his fucking life, where She’d called him my love, and he’d understood why her heart always skipped when Ben said it. He was Her’s. Every single fucking part of Ben was Her’s, and he couldn’t even bring himself to be mad about the dog comment, because She was fucking right. He’d follow her everywhere, and snarl at what threatened her, and taking whatever fucking scraps she offered him of her love.
He’d never have enough of Her love. It was better than any drug or drink or high, and it was for Ben. It was all goddamn his, and if that meant he had to be a fucking pathetic dog for Her, then so goddamn be it. Anyone would do that, love Her how she asked, because it made Her fucking smile and chased off the pain faster.
And Ben had learned that, in his life, he’d really only despised two people. He’d hated a lot of people, but that was hatred born of vengeance and a sour, white-hot fury that had festered in his body for most of his life and found an avenue out through the drums. Despising people wasn’t the same. It was born of true, raw, pure disgust and loathing. A channel for that fury that wasn’t about Ben’s own anger, but about twisting and morphing the fury into ardor and zealous protection. Turning the drums and wrath into something better, that targeted the only two pussy fucking idiots who made Her fucking cry. The only two asshole cum-fucks who knew exactly how to hurt Her, and weaponized it, making Her sob against Ben as she broke.
Nobody made Her fucking cry but Homelander and her mother. She made herself cry sometimes, but that wasn’t the fucking same. That was born of how much She cared and loved everything, and how she seemed to remember every goddamn thing anyone ever said and took it as gospel—when it fucking wasn’t—to who she was. When Homelander and her mother made Her cry, it was born of something evil. Something evil and cold and horrid and covered in bile and guts to carve her open.
Ben would kill Homelander, if not for the world, for Her. And despite the truth that he had no fucking interest in trying to entertain anyone in Her life who made her fucking cry like that, he still wanted to meet her mother. Not to kill her, but just put the fear of God in her. Make the woman understand that her daughter was a goddamn miracle on Earth, and Ben was going to love Her until it was just them in a ruined world, watching the stars and laying in the grass and smiling. He’d love her like the perfect, dangerous, beautiful thing that had crawled to him covered in blood and dirt and grime that she was, wrapped in fire and still seeking warmth. Ben wanted to sneer at Her mother to never try to fucking bother them, because if the woman said one wrong thing to Her, Ben wouldn’t tolerate it. There wasn’t a fucking chance he was letting anyone make her look all fucking sad, when She was meant to be happy. He might not cut out tongues when people misstepped, but he’d stay wrapped around Her, a silent reminder to the world—to Her mother—that Ben loved Her, and she’d always fucking have him. However She wanted Ben, she’d get him.
Ben would always hate that she never got to meet his mother, because they’d have fucking loved each other. His mother would’ve liked Her, a bit because everyone fucking liked Her, but mostly because She was better than Ben was. She was better thanany other pussy in the universe, and She was smart, and kind, and clever, and the type of beautiful his mother would’ve said made gods jealous. That was what his mother had always said he should find, even after he’d become Soldier Boy,and he’d never fucking gotten what the hell it meant before Her. He’d had countless beautiful women in his bed, and not one would’ve made gods jealous. They were just beautiful. There was so much fucking beauty in the world, and Soldier Boy got all of it, and Ben had decided that the made gods jealous shit was just something a mother told her son.
He got it now though. She was the type of beauty that made gods fucking jealous. Because she was the type of beautiful they wrote stories about, made art and castles and temples for, and searched through the world to learn more words for beauty just to fucking compare Her to. And all the beauty in the universe lived inside of Her, and she was fucking perfect. So Ben’s mother would’ve loved Her, because she carried Ben’s whole fucking world just by existing. He’d have sat in silence as they talked about whatever the fuck mothers and daughters talked about, and She’d have hit him halfway through the conversation to ask him his opinion, then made a joke about his opinion with joy and love in Her eyes and Ben’s body, and he’d have smiled at Her, and when they stood up to leave his mother would’ve hugged Her and that would’ve been it. It would’ve confirmed something that Ben already fucking knew, but still wanted his mother to know as well.
And something still sour and angry in Ben wished he could introduce Her to his father. One, quick meeting just to say fuck you, you old pussy. I am worth something, because I’m repenting, and I’m fighting for people I care about, and the most perfect woman in fucking history loves me, and she’s never wrong. Ben wouldn’t let his father speak to Her—he barely deserved to be in Her presence—but he’d brag about her. Tell his father that She was a brilliant fucking woman, and a fucking doctor, and never took any goddamn shortcuts, and She loved Ben. To tell his father that their last name would die with him, and he’d rot in a grave for the rest of time while She and Ben were fucking happy, and Ben gave her the world.
He’d give this perfect fucking menace—curled at his side, wearing his shirt and eating chicken nuggets like a fucking animal—whatever she wanted or needed and asked for. His lungs and heart and guts out of his body, the sun to hold in her hands, a hundred fucking trees planted in her name. Ben would offer his life on a silver platter for Her to do whatever she pleased with it, which is why he almost snorted when She started stealing looks at his food, chewing on her lips and eyeing his fries like she hadn’t just practically fucking inhaled her own.
He dumped them onto her plate without a word, and when Her face lit up with joy he didn’t fucking understand how anyone could fucking think to hurt Her. He was a little bias—not everyone was as fucking genius as Ben was to love her, or strong enough to be loved by her—but he still just didn’t goddamn get it. How a single goddamn pussy fucker could look at Her and consider being cruel to her. Even when he thought back to the beginning, Ben had never wanted to hurt her. He’d found Her annoying, and been mad about the whole borderline blackmailing shit, but he’d never wanted to make her cry. Her crying had always set off something primal and feral and confusing in his body, making his every thought this is fucking wrong. Something like Her shouldn’t hurt or be in pain.
Ben coughed, and her pretty eyes shot up to meet his with a little bit of sauce hanging on her lip. Sauce that Ben got to wipe off with his thumb, eat, and smirk as Her mouth remained parted and her heart kicked into a faster gear.
“Ben-“
“I haven’t had a thanksgiving since the 50s.” Ben grunted, and wasn’t fucking sure where this was coming from. All he did know was that She fell silent to listen, and the words started to fucking vomit out of him, and he needed Her to understand that She was his family. That he’d never allow himself to be someone who made her cry. “And it was fucking shit. Food was fine, drinks were weak, and I went because my mother begged me to. Nobody seemed to get why I was there, my own family didn’t fucking know me because my father didn’t let my mom talk about me, and all I did the whole night was answer fucking Soldier Boy questions.”
She blinked at him. “What are Soldier Boy questions?”
“What was the war like,” Ben grunted. “If I shoot you will it hurt. Think you can fucking outdrink me or beat me in a race. Elvis and Sinatra a good time, Garland a good fuck. I wore my fucking supe suit there because I’d be shipping off to film some fucking movie in the morning, and my father didn’t look at me the whole time. I left early, and that was the fucking end of it. But,” Ben swallowed, and suddenly this was impossibly fucking difficult. He had to get this right. “I’d try it again. I could kill a turkey and you could burn it, and if you want the team we could fuck after they leave-“
“Ben.”
He cut himself off, and Her smile was so simply fucking sweet. It wasn’t the syrupy, over exaggerated and slightly crude one she gave when people tried to make her be nice when the situation didn’t fucking call for it. This was all fucking love and affection and want for Ben.
“When we get to November,” she whispered, and Ben’s whole body was frozen in place. As if, should he blink, he’d miss a single word or moment of her love. “I’d love to do thanksgiving with you and the team. I’d love to do anything with you, except killing the turkey.” Her nose wrinkled. “That’s gross.”
She’d love to do anything with him. She’d love to do anything with Ben.
“Good,” he muttered, moving their plates off to the side and pulling her with him towards the headboard, moving her to rest between his legs, his arms wrapping over her stomach as he kissed her neck and hummed in her ear. “Whatever the fuck you want, beautiful, as long as you’re not cooking.”
She twisted around in his hold, pushing his chest lightly as he grinned at her. “Fucking rude, Benjamin. I can cook perfectly well now, and I certainly a whole lot better than you are-“
“You’re better at most things than I am,” Ben shrugged. “And fuck me for trying to stop everyone from eating your piss-poor pie and getting fucking poisoned-“
“You love my pie. You won’t shut the fuck up about my pie.” There was a smug, proud look in her eyes at her dogshit innuendo, and Ben snorted.
“That might be the only thing you’re not good at,” Ben said her name, kneading his hands against her skin. “That didn’t even make goddamn sense-“
“Fuck you, Ben, you got hard-“
“Because you’re fucking sitting on me, darling.” He leaned down, nipping at Her lower lip. “And that will always make me hard.”
Her heart stumbled in her chest. “Shut up.”
“No. I love you, and I’m never going to fucking apologize for wanting to fuck my woman.” Ben winked at Her. “And I always want to fuck you.”
She cleared her throat, and her gaze was suddenly sharp. Her love still lived in Ben—running up and down his spine, eternal and so fucking powerful it might consume him, and he’d let it—but Her fingers were tapping on Ben’s chest, the gears of Her impossibly brilliant mind turning behind her eyes.
“Ben?”
He grunted, the grunt she’d said meant he was listening to her, and she let out a long breath.
“Do you, have you thought about after?”
“After what.”
“After this.” She made a gesture to the air, eyes still locked onto Ben’s. “All of this. If we kill Homelander-“
“When. When we fucking kill Homelander-”
She gave him a flat look. “When we kill Homelander. What do you, um, what do you want after?”
Ben knew exactly what he fucking wanted. Her. Whatever way he got to have her, he wanted her. But he didn’t know how to say that without sounding like a fucking dumbass, so he hesitated. One fucking second too long, because something is her eyes looked wounded, and Ben had to talk right fucking now. She deserved to be told with all the fucking poetry and art in the fucking universe, but that wasn’t Ben. He didn’t know how the hell to do that, but she also didn’t want anyone but Ben, so he settled on his way. The blunt, clear as fucking day truth.
He said Her name, moving a hand up to cup her cheek, letting his thumb run over her cheekbone. “Whatever the hell you want, I want as well. That’s fucking that.”
“But I want to knowwhat you want.” She mumbled, hands fisting in his shirt. “I, I just want to hear about it. Don’t worry about, um,” her tongue peaked out from her lips, her chewing becoming rapid with Her heart. “Anything. What I’ll think, how I’ll react. I just want to know.”
Ben’s hand on her hips stilled, and he clung to Her—alive inside him—to make sure She was serious. He had the feeling they both knew what Ben wanted, but he’d had no desire to say it aloud. Not when Homelander was still fucking alive, still trying to hurt her, and had been so fucking close to crossing that final, horrible, unspeakable line once more barely a few months ago.
But She was content inside of him. There wasn’t any sickness or cold or sense of wrong, only the pleading look in Her eyes and her hands turning the fabric of Ben’s shirt between them as she waited.
“Swear that if you start to-“
“I’ll stop you,” She whispered, holding Ben’s gaze. “I promise. Please tell me.”
“I want this.” He muttered, a careful ear on Her heart for the slightest stutter. “I want you and me, for the rest of fucking time.”
He stopped, and hoped that was enough. And of course, it fucking wasn’t.
She dropped her face on his shoulder. “And?”
“That’s it-“
“Where do you want us to be?” She mumbled, and Ben could feel her eyes on his as she turned her head. “Rome? A little no name town? New York, LA-“
“No. Not fucking LA-“
“Then where-“
“Wherever the fuck you are, I’ll be fine-“
“Ben.” His eyes moved to watch her without his fucking permission. “I want to know what you want-“
“That is what I fucking want.” He grunted. “I just fucking want you and whatever the hell you want I’ll be good with. I don’t give a fuck where we are, because I’ll be there with you, and that’s what I want. If you want a little fucking postcard town, then we’ll go there. I’ll get a job in the woods so I don’t have to see anyone but you, and you can do whatever the fuck you want all day. If you want Rome, we’ll get you there and do the escort plan until we have a fucking mansion, and I’ll fuck you in every corner of it. If you ask I’ll fuck you full of kids, until we can run our own goddamn little league.” Ben had started, and now he couldn’t fucking stop. “If you want to stay in New York, we’ll find a goddamn apartment and have Annie and Hughie over for lunch, and I’ll take you to stupid fucking movies and we’ll dance the kitchen and sit on the roof until I carry you to bed. If you want to travel the world and help people, I’ll be right at your fucking side, and if you just want to go back to Boston I’ll be there as well. We can have a shitty house that’s older than I am, and you’ll do your decorating shit and be nice to all our stupid neighbors. You can do whatever the fuck smart people do, and I can teach our kids to fucking hate all your stupid sports teams, and we’ll drive them down to the fucking Cape for the summer, and when everyone’s asleep I’ll bring you outside and fuck you on the beach. I’ll fuck you anywhere, Sunshine. I’ll be fucking happy anywhere, because I’ll be wherever you are. So I don’t care what you give me, kids or no kids or a house or a fucking dumpster. As long as you’re there, I’ll be good.”
Before Ben had even fucking finished speaking, She was smiling at him. And it was all raw fucking joy. “Okay,” She whispered, and rose back up Ben’s body, pressing her brow to his and still fucking smiling. “I’d like that.”
“Which-“
“All of it.” She made a small, blissful sound. “Thank you.”
He didn’t tell Her not to thank him. Ben just allowed one arm wrap around her waist, and his hand moved up to hold the back of Her head. He let their lips brush, but not further, and muttered. “I fucking love you, Sunshine. I’m serious-“
“I know you are.” Her hands glided down Ben’s chest, pushing Herself a little higher up, a little closer, on his chest. “You’re a huge, very serious, grumpy old cunt.” She closed the last bit of space between them, her lips fitting so fucking perfectly against Ben’s, her body melting into his like it was fucking meant to. Her words hummed through Ben’s blood, setting him alight. “And I love you too.”
It was all he needed. Ben rolled the over, caging Her between him and the mattress—safe, fucking safe and goddamn happy—without ever breaking their kiss. Ben let her hands roam over his body, let her tug his shirt up and her hands trace paths over the bare skin of his chest and torso that lit him on fucking fire.
“Off,” She mumbled into Ben’s mouth, pulling his shirt further up his chest. “Off, Ben, please-“
Ben raised himself up—keeping her against the bed, pinned under his weight by his thighs—and half ripped his shirt off his body before immediately returning. Propping himself up on one elbow, diving down to her neck and sucking and biting a path that made Her sigh, a whining and high sound, and grind up into his torso.
“Want you,” he muttered Her name against her skin, his free hand moving under Her shirt—Ben’s shirt—to play with the waistline of her panties. “Want you all the fucking time, Sunshine. What do you-“
“You,” Her answer was breathless, soft and high and ending in a slight whine as Ben’s thumb pressed right over Her clothed clit. “Want you, Ben, please. Need you.“
He groaned as one of Her hands slid between their bodies, palming at his cock, tenting against Her thighs. “How do you-“
“Don’t care, just want you-“
Ben decided to do it slow. Gentle and fucking sweet. Too good, and all Ben’s to praise and tend to and revere. So he pulled his shirt off Her body—carefully this time, because it did fucking things to Ben when she wore his clothing and he never wanted to take that away from himself—and pressed his palm over her soaked panties, kissing a line down between and under her breasts, rising back up to take a nipple in his mouth, smirking at the high squeak that left her mouth as he sucked.
Her hands had shot into his hair, her chest heaving as Ben continued his work, starting to roll his hand over her clit. “Ben-“
You’re so fucking beautiful, Sunshine. He let his teeth graze over her—forcing himself to keep focus as she bucked her hips up—and switched to the other nipple. Can’t believe you’re all fucking mine. So fucking good for me, darling, so goddamn perfect.
“Please-“
She cut herself off with a whine as Ben flicked his tongue, his palm pushing down against her, halting her movements up into him.
Want to fucking show you how perfect you are, my love. Let me fucking show you-
Please, Ben, fuck, please-
He grinned at the breathless tone of Her voice between their minds, and surged back up, crashing his mouth into Hers and kissing her until she moaned. Long and desperate, half a sound of need and half his name, already fucking wrecked without friction, Ben holding her still under him.
“Want you to be loud,” he grunted Her name into her mouth. “Talk to me, tell me how fucking good it feels-“
She nodded frantically, and Ben chuckled.
“Words-“
“Feels good,” She mumbled, words practically fucking slurred. “Feels so good, Ben, god-“
“Have I told you,” he drawled, swallowing Her whimper as he pressed his hand further against her. “How much you consume my every fucking thought. How much I think about you, how it’s a goddamn problem, how much I adore and love you?”
“You’ve-“ She took a ragged breath as Ben’s head dropped to suck and lick at her neck. “I think you’ve mention it-“
“See, I still think you don’t fucking understand.” Ben bit at her skin and she rolled Her hips, pulling at his hair. “You’re my fucking life, Sunshine. And I’ll say it until you get it into your pretty head. You’re perfect, every single goddamn part of you. You’re too fucking clever, darling, so good and kind and brilliant.” Ben trailed back up, tugging at Her ear and kissing over her cheekbone before pressing his brow to hers.
“Ben-“
He chuckled as she tried to chase his mouth, and started to rub large circles against her clit with his palm, tracing his fingers over the slit of her pussy, still covered by her underwear.
“Fuck-“
“I can fucking feel that sharp, insane mind of yours inside me, beautiful.” He dropped his mouth just an inch further down, holding himself where their lips brushed as he spoke, but no further. “And I love you there the most. Love how fucking bright you are, Sunshine. This mouth of yours is so fucking smart,” he traced his lips over Hers, and she whimpered, eyes blown out and wide on his. “And you can be such a fucking brat, darling, but I goddamn love it. You’re my best fucking friend, and the most impossible fucking pain in my ass I could ever ask to love.”
She was fucking coming apart below him. Sighing in Ben’s mouth and letting him push his tongue down her throat, letting him kiss Her until he decided he should probably keep up with the plan he’d come up with, or else he’d just fucking kiss her until he came in his pants like a goddamn teenager.
Ben dragged his lips from Hers, and her sound of protest turned to a soft moan as Ben kissed every fucking inch of her face her could reach, love and want fucking rioting inside of him as she tried to move to offer him better access.
“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he muttered, dragging his hand up from her cunt to hold her face, running his fingers over her lips and cheekbones and jaw. “You’re a goddamn marvel, Sunshine, you’re fucking art.”
“Benjamin-“
Her words were a long, breathy, desperate moan, and he dropped back down to her lips. “I know, my love. I’ll get there-”
“I want you there now, you fucking dick-“
“And you get my fucking dick,” Ben hummed Her name, feeling himself twitch in his pants as he glanced down at her body, squirming and grinding and fucking perfect under him. “Patience.”
“I hate you-“
“You fucking love me.” He kissed back down Her neck, over her collarbones. You love how grumpy I am, and how hard I work, and my fucking dick. But I think what you love most, Ben squeezed where he was holding Her waist. Is how I fucking worship you like you deserve. Make you feel fucking good, Sunshine, take real good care of you-
I, She took a long breath, hands tugging Ben’s face back up, Her eyes on his still lustful, but now soft as well. That’s not what I love most about you.
He grunted Her name between their heads, but she pushed on.
I love how much you care, period. You don’t half-ass anything, Benjamin, and that includes caring. I’ve never seen anyone care about anything so aggressively as you care about baseball and stupid war documentaries and ice cream. I’ve never been cared about as much as you care about me. I didn’t think it was possible to care about someone as much as you care about me. She smiled at him, and Ben was pretty goddamn sure his heart fucking exploded. You care about me and Ryan and everything else you love so violently and wrathfully and powerfully, and that’s what I love most about you.
Ben’s voice sounded fucking hoarse in his own head. Sunshine-
But, She curled up, kissing Ben’s nose. It’s only one reason on a very long list, my love-
That snapped something deep in Ben's head, and it cleared his brain to Her. Everything in the universe narrowed to Her.
This kiss was fucking brutal. Ben’s hand fisted Her hair, his teeth and spit and tongue Hers as well, his whole body demanding more. He’d never been more fucking satiated, and he’d never be more fucking hungry.
I love you, he muttered Her name between their heads. I love every single goddamn thing about you. And I’ve got a whole fucking plan to show you, so for once in your goddamn life, let me do the talking, darling. Moan and scream and beg all you fucking want, but I talk.
But you said-
I changed my mind. No talking.
Ben-
Deal?
She nodded, finger’s curling on Ben’s face as she writhed below him. Deal, fucking deal, just please-
I’ve meant everything I said about how much I love you. How smart and kind and clever and perfect that mind of yours is. But fucking Christ, Sunshine, you’re a goddamn wet dream.
She moaned as Ben moved back to Her body, worshiping Her shoulder and neck and chest with his mouth, Her hips and waist and ass with his hands.
Every single fucking thing about you is goddamn perfection, but these, Ben returned his mouth to Her nipple, her moan only spurring him on. Were crafted by some sort of evil god. They’re fucking magic, beautiful, you could fucking win a war with them. He raised his spare hand to knead at Her other breast, and a strangled sound that sounded like his name left her mouth.
“God, please-“
I talk. Ben squeezed Her one last time, flicking her nipple before switching to soothe the hurt with his tongue, and moved his hand back up to Her mouth. Be fucking good for me, darling, and listen.
Ben-
He pressed his fingers between Her lips, and she didn’t fucking hesitate to start sucking on them. Licking and nipping and fucking moaning around him, and he groaned against Her tit.
Fucking Christ, you’re going to kill me. He left one last kiss on her nipple, rising up just enough to watch her. You’re so fucking beautiful-
She whined, bucking up into Ben’s fully hard cock, and Her eyes on his were a plea.
Want to cum, Sunshine?
She only nodded, kicking his abdomen, and he chuckled, pulling his fingers away with a pop.
Just a little longer, darling. Hold on for me.
Ben didn’t wait to see the desperation in Her eyes—he could feel it in his fucking body—before he was dropping back down, kissing between her breasts, over her stomach, and leaving one soft, fucking sweet kiss over her clothed clit before leaning back and ripping off her panties, admiring his handiwork.
She was fucking dripping. Soaking the sheets, so fucking perfect, and all goddamn Ben’s.
You’ve got the best fucking legs I’ve ever seen, he muttered into her head, kissing and biting a loose pattern over her inner thighs. Could fucking die here. But this, Ben parted Her swollen pussy lips, smirking at her small gasp. Is like a fucking drug. You’re always so fucking wet for me, my love, I don’t even need to prep you. But I think I will anyway.
Ben pushed two fingers into Her, pumping slowly and groaning as she squeezed around him. Then, just for his fucking self, Ben pulled Her clit into his mouth and sucked. Going and going without pointless shit like air, scissoring and pushing his fingers in deeper, and only stopping when She screamed, and his whole fucking face got soaked. He felt and smelled and tasted Her fucking everywhere, and it was like fucking water. Earthier and harsher and so fucking Her, but just as goddamn critical to Ben’s life now.
He pushed himself off of Her, rising back up to his knees and groaning at the sight of Her. Fucking glowing, goddamn ruined. Looking at Ben like he was something holy and sacred, and to Her, he was. He could feel it fucking everywhere, and taste it on his tongue as he licked his lips.
He hoped She fucking lingered there for the rest of time. That every night for the rest of his life, Ben could run a hand through his beard, and end up with his fingers fucking covered in Her.
You fucking squirted.
She nodded, and—despite the fucking choir of Her love around Ben in the world—only moaned, reaching up for him.
Think you can do it again?
She whined, and Ben chuckled.
Words, darling-
Yes, fuck Ben, please-
Good girl.
She practically flew off the fucking bed as her hips jerked up, her heart stuttering with her breath. God, fuck, please-
Ben grinned, and he could never fucking deny her anything, so he ripped his pants off, stroking himself once, twice—just to how fucking beautiful she was—and pushed himself in with a groan. He fell over Her as he bottomed out, and fuck She was perfect. Fluttering around him, fitting him like they’d been fucking designed to be as close as goddamn possible, gasping in Ben’s ear as Her hands clawed at his back.
Ready, Sunshine?
Just move, you ass-
He kissed Her—bruising and demanding and made of all this fucking love for Her that consumed Ben’s whole goddamn existence—and obeyed.
Ben didn’t think he’d ever worked harder than to memorize every single fucking part of Her. What every pout and glare and smile meant, how She said his name and every small way she existed around him—in music and movies and shows and books and the flowers in MM’s garden—and how She moved. Ben had learned Her like fucking she was a fucking testament to how he should live, and he took it goddamn seriously. It was what helped him know how to fuck Her right. How to angle himself inside her so he was hitting that spot that always made Her let out a strangled moan, how to kiss her in a fucking rhythm as he pounded himself into her, and that, if he groaned when She squeezed around him, she’d start to try and grind up into him.
This was better than a fucking drug. This was fucking oxygen, how warm and tight she was around him, how when Ben deepened their kiss she opened up for him and scratched his back, how sensitive She was—leaning into his every touch, moaning at every muttered and growled praise—and how he could fucking feel Her. How fucking perfect She was, finally around him in every single possible way. So fucking bright, a green mist that smelled like pine and vanilla and damn strawberries covering the room as she shinedlike fucking star under Ben, Her eyes watching him like he was something good.
Ben was something good, for Her. It lived in how he tended and adored and cared for her, and he wanted to be something that was half as fucking perfect as she was, just so she’d let him stay here for the rest of fucking time. Buried deep inside Her, his thrusts becoming stuttered as he began to lose control—no fucking idiot pussy could blame him, though, because She was squirming under him and moaning his name so I was a miracle he lasted this long—and letting every single fucking thought of Her fall out of his mouth, down her throat.
“So fucking good,” he grunted Her name. “Taking me so fucking perfect. You sound like a fucking song, look so fucking beautiful all fucked out, love you, taking me so fucking well-“
He cut himself off with a groan as her head dropped to his jaw, kissing along his beard with sinful fucking whimpers.
“Christ, you’re a goddamn miracle, fucking made for me.” Ben pushed one hand between their bodies, rolling his hips to press against the deepest part of her as he pinched and rubbed over her clit.
Her mouth fell open in a silent scream, Her heart hitting that frantic pace that meant she was close, and when Her hands trying to push Ben further into her he moved faster, crashing his mouth back into her and growling Her name.
“You’re fucking perfect.” Ben’s words became fast and rough, their brows pressed together so he could see every inch of Her beautiful face, his own orgasm pushing at his restraint. “You so fucking good, darling, good to everyone, so fucking good to me. I fucking love you-“
“Ben,” Her voice was a whisper of pure fucking need that almost sent Ben over the edge. “Please-“
He kissed Her again, soft and sweet as his movements become almost feral, splitting her fucking open on his cock. Cum for me, Sunshine, say my name-
She screamed—Ben’s name lost somewhere in many high, wrecked sounds of God and fuck—and Ben let go. Driven on by Her fucking squirting over him, her pussy contracting like she was trying to really fucking kill him, Ben made one last, long thrust as he emptied himself into Her body. He waited for Her breathy, blissful sigh that meant she was happy and high on pleasure before pressing one last, soft kiss to between Her eyes, tucking hair behind her ears, and lowering himself down. Covering her body in his like he could serve as a shield from fucking everything. From the daylight and blue sky, slowing creeping over them and threatening that morning was here, and they couldn’t fucking stay here forever. From the battle they were staged to fight, where Ben would have to just be fucking silent at Her side. From every single factor that neither of them could control, from everything that might hurt Her or make her cry. Every single weak thing that dared to pretend they were worthy sharing the same air that She fucking breathed.
And She let them stay like that. With Ben’s body likely fucking dead-weight over her, his arms wrapped around her waist as he buried his head between her breasts, her hands even moving to hold his face, tilting it up for Ben to meet her gaze.
He scanned over her face, perfect and fucking beautiful and all fucking Ben’s. “Hi, Sunshine.”
“Hi, Benjamin, my love.”
She couldn’t be allowed to fucking call him that. If Ben ever wanted to be a goddamn productive member of society, She couldn’t keep calling him my love. And, Christ on a fucking cross, Benjamin, my love, was worse. That made him short circuit and practically fucking gape at Her. It repeated over and over in his head, and he probably looked like an idiot fucking pussy, just gaping at Her, but fuck She was so pretty, and happy, and Ben’s and Her Her Her, everything in him kept calling Ben home to Her.
Ben managed to regain just enough control over his stupid fucking lovestruck body to roll them over, tugging Her down until that bright, drug-like smile was right above him, Her arms holding her a few inches away from him.
“You’re a fucking thief,” Ben drawled Her name, and was unable to contain a dumb fucking smile from overtaking his face. It was born from Her—hair messy, fucking naked, beautiful mouth still slightly swollen and pretty eyes still so dazed from sex—being so goddamn near him. Her smell that was half wrapped in salt from sweat and Ben’s cum, Her perfect face all fucking happy above him, Her smile and love fucking intoxicating. A high Ben never had to come down from, because even as She gave him a fake pout he just got higher.
“I am not a thief, that’s mean-“
“You’re fucking mean.” He grabbed Her hips, pulling them down to press against his and letting Her sit over him. “And you’re a goddamn thief. I call you my love, you stole my goddamn idea-“
She scoffed, crossing her arms and glaring down at him. “You are not the first dummy to call their person my love, Pretty Boy-“
“I said it first with us-“
“Well you don’t get a patent over it-“
“The fuck I don’t.”
They were glowering at each other, and Ben knew he’d lost when a soft smile crossed her face, a sharp look glinting in her eyes. “Well then I am a thief,” She crawled back down his body, bumping their noses and kissing along Ben’s jaw. “Because it’s mine now. I call you my love, and that’s that.”
He scowled, but it was getting harder to even keep up the charade of this fake fight when She was squirming above him and his hands were bruising at Her hips. “You don’t get to just fucking take it-“
“Yes, I do.”
Ben hauled Her further up his body, fully moving her to collapse over him, a high yelp leaving her as Ben kissed every single fucking inch of skin he could angle his head to find. “Fucking brat.” He grunted, rutting slightly up into Her thighs and growing harder as he felt her wetness, dripping down her thighs. “Already so goddamn needy for me again, want me to fuck you good, darling? Again?”
She was fucking perfect. It wasn’t Ben’s own damn bias or love or something fucking pathetic—but entirely goddamn warranted, She was his life and Ben was allowed to be a little bit of a fucking pussy about her—She was just so fucking clearly perfect. She might be the only person alive who was more dirty-minded and horny than Ben, and he pitied any fucker who’d tried to keep up with Her before him. Her head ended up thrown back as she rode him, a beautiful fucking squeak leaving her when Ben took back control, grabbing Her hips and drilling up into Her until her pretty eyes rolled back and she was shaking around him.
When he found his release with Her own—letting Her grind over his cock and scrape at his abdomen as she made sounds that were fucking music—Ben had to take a long, heavy breath to stop himself from just rolling Her over and going for round three when he saw his cum leaking and coating her thighs.
She giggled slightly, brushing some of Ben’s hair from his eyes.
“What-“
“We really do fuck like rabbits,” She said, shifting around until their legs were tangled, pulling Ben’s arms over her body. “Hughie asked if it was the supe stamina, but I think it might just be us.”
“You talked to Hughie about our sex life-“
She wrinkled her nose at him. “Technically I was talking to Annie, but Hughie was forced to listen. And halfway through the story about the dishes incident, he asked if copious amounts of sex was normal for two supes.”
It wasn’t. Ben had fucked half the female supe population before Russia, and it might as well have been juvenile dry humping compared to what he did with her. But he was still caught on the talking to Annie shit. “What the fuck else do you tell her about us-“
“Normal friend stuff,” she shrugged, leaving soft kisses along his beard as She spoke. “How much I love you, how you made me pancakes for breakfast again, how good you are with Ryan and how adorably grumpy you get when we talk about books, how I’m going to bribe you to read something with Ryan and I, and Hughie and Annie are welcome read with us-“
“You’re going to fucking bribe me-“
She continued, kissing the bridge of Ben’s nose and holding his gaze. “Usually Hughie clocks out when I start talking about how much I love your dick, though-“
Ben raised his brows at Her. “You talk about my dick with fucking Hughie? What, are you telling Butcher about my balls-“
“I would if he would listen.” She smiled, dropping back down, kissing everywhere but Ben’s fucking lips. “Benjamin, my love, if you were fucking you, you’d never shut up about it either-“
His eyes narrowed. “You did it again.”
She hummed, her smile so perfectly and beautifully mocking innocence. “I don’t know what you could possibly be talking about.”
Ben snaked one hand up her back, tangling his finger in her hair and moving her back his mouth. Kissing her until she was writhing and moaning above him, a tiny whine leaving her lips when he pulled away.
“Ben-“
“You’re the love of my fucking life, Sunshine, and you should know that-“
“I do know that,” She whispered, and Ben could fucking feel it. Spreading between them, how he was just as critical to Her as She was to him. Her piece of him so fucking strong inside of him, twined into something so deep inside of Ben’s body he’d never fucking known about it before. “I know that all the time, Ben. And I need you to know that I love you.” She sighed, wrapping her arms around his neck. “You do so much for me, and I want to give you something back-“
“You give me more than fucking enough-“
She shook her head. “I want to do more. It’s just a name, Pretty Boy. You have a million of them for me, and I’m sure you’ll come up with more.”
Ben groaned, because he’d fucking lost this one as well. She was too fucking pretty, half-pouting up at him and loving him and so fucking happy around him, alive inside him, and Ben needed to get his fucking shit together, but he didn’t want to. This was so fucking good, and She was so goddamn perfect, and when he made a grumbling relent, her smile was so fucking bright and sweet and all for him.
“Thank you, Benjamin, my love.”
She kissed him one last time, and Ben needed to get better at faking a genuine scowl, because right now he goddamn knew he looked just like the fucking puppy dog She kept accusing him of being. Watching Her and trying to act like he was annoyed by this, when everything in him was just Her. Making his whole fucking life better and loving him and wanting him and being so fucking annoying and he wouldn’t change a goddamn thing.
“We could both fucking use it-“
“No.” She mumbled, burying her face in his neck. “Mine.”
And Ben couldn’t fucking argue with that. He was Hers. He was holding Her against him as they both made a completely fucking pointless attempt to properly rest in the last hour before they had to get up, watching the light start to dance over her perfect face, and he wanted to be here for the rest of his goddamn life.
He really fucking wanted to be with Her, forever. He’d always fucking burn with her, but he wanted to just stay here. No burning, just warm and love and good. In whatever goddamn form it took, Ben just really fucking wanted Her.
She was half-asleep, and there was a chance she wouldn’t even hear him. But Ben muttered Her name anyway, and waited for her small sound of acknowledgement, her hand squeezing his bicep in a silent signal that she was listening.
“I love you.”
“I love you, too-“
“I really fucking love you,” Ben grunted. “And we should get married. Now.”
Her heart hitched slightly, but all she did was smile against Ben’s skin. “You’re going to have to try harder than that, my love.”
Ben snorted slightly, and knew that he would. He’d have to make it romantic. Something that she deserved, that made every single other fucking gesture in history seem fucking stupid. There would be music and flowers—she fucking loved music and flowers—and chocolate, and maybe a horse. Ben didn’t have a goddamn clue why he’d need a horse, but those things always seemed involved in romance somehow, so he’d have to figure out where the fuck to get a horse, and how to work it in with everything else.
But then he looked down at Her—sleeping peacefully above Ben, breath warming his neck and lips brushing over his skin—and knew she wouldn’t give a fuck about a horse. He didn’t need to make it complicated, just do it right.
Fuck, if he tried right now—more than just a grumbled idea that made Her love spark in his head and bones—Ben could probably get it right. He could roll her over, kiss her neck, cheeks, brow, and lips, and tell Her to fucking marry me. I love you, and I love every single part of you, and I want every single part of you, and I’ll spend the rest of my fucking life proving that to you, starting now. If you let me, I’ll pick you up and we can go find a judge and do it right goddamn now. I don’t have a ring, but I’ll find one, I’ll find you whatever the fuck you want, and that will be it. You and me, for the rest of fucking time, together.
He didn’t, though. She was, somehow, fast asleep, and Ben had no desire to wake Her. Not when her face was so relaxed, and Ben could just lay here and care for her in silence. Hold Her until he saw the clock flash 5:30, and they had to move.
They were silent getting ready. Ben wore his supe suit, She kept his shirt on—her eyes bleary and gaze slightly unfocused as she shuffled around the room—and Ben didn’t fight her when she grabbed their suitcase. Her grip on it was white-knuckled and smoking, and even though she was probably about to do fucking everything at the meeting for everyone else, she needed to be useful. Ben knew that drawn focus, and mechanical breathing, and rapid tapping of Moon River. It was her I’m doing this, my way, and that means doing it fucking right, face. It was the one that Ben knew he could help with an arm looped through hers and a kiss on the side of Her head, promising that he was fucking there, and not going anywhere.
The rest of the team seemed to know that face by now as well. Enough so for Butcher not to make any mocking comments about how that shirt was very obviously Ben’s, Annie and Hughie not to try and engage her in boring, pointless fucking conversation, and MM to only give her a tight nod as they tossed the suitcase in the back and climbed into the limo.
The ride was completely silent. Her head was leaned back on Ben's shoulder, her eyes closed but heartbeat fast, and her finger still tapping, faster and faster, on Ben’s arm.
He muttered Her name between their heads, and her eyes slowly opened, her face turning to look at him.
Ben.
You’re going to be fucking fine.
I know-
I’m serious, he pushed Her a little further up his body, making their eyes level. You’re going to be fucking fine. We’re going to figure this out, no matter what happens, or what the pussies decide. We’ll take care of this, together.
She swallowed, but gave Ben a soft, reassuring smile that didn’t hit her eyes. Together. I love you.
I love you too. Ben paused, scanning over her face. If those cumfucks ask-
We’re dating. Her smile grew a little wider, and her fingers stilled on Ben’s skin. Or fuck-buddy-brain-connected. My vote is-
Ben kissed Her, squeezing her body once, and Her giggle into his mouth might be the best fucking thing he’s ever heard.
You’re not allowed to vote on what we call things.
She fake-pouted against him. This is a democracy, Benjamin-
No, it’s not. He grinned, nipping on her lower lip. It’s a constitutional monarchy, where you’re the fucking Queen. And the Queen isn’t supposed to vote.
She pulled back, giving Ben a wide, amused smile he could feel something soften in his stomach. Look who paid attention in civics class.
I paid attention to you and Ryan, not some boring fucking history teacher. I’ve told you, your boobs have magical fucking powers, Sunshine. They move when you talk and I always fucking listen.
Gross.
You love it.
I do. She traced a hand over Ben’s jaw, the sharp smile playing over her features lighting up the whole goddamn world. Because we’re fuck-buddy-brain-connected.
Ben rolled his eyes. Don’t call us that.
Can I call us that on the Ben’o’phone?
You can do whatever the fuck you want in here, Ben held Her hand on his face, kissing her palm. But if you tell Singer that we’re fuck-buddy-brain-connected, I’m not fucking you for a week.
Her eyes narrowed. That’s a bad bluff, Pretty Boy.
It was. Ben wouldn’t make it two fucking days before he caved, even if all She did smile and talk to him. But he kept his face set and neutral, shrugging slightly. So fucking call me on it, Sunshine.
Her tongue peaked between her lips as she chewed, nose twitching, and she sighed. Fuck you.
Don’t call us that shit, Ben winked. And I will. Hard, this time, until you’re rolling around and can’t feel your fucking legs. Until we finally get you to really, properly squirt, and I can fucking taste it. Ben kissed Her nose, light and teasing. I’ll fuck until we break the goddamn bed, and you’re burning down the whole goddamn building with how good I make you cum. Think you’d like that, darling? He smirked at Her slack expression, pressing his thumb between her lips and feeling his cock twitch when they parted. Think you’d want me to make you cum so fucking hard you scream my name and light up like a fucking star? Think you could be a good girl and let go when I fuck you?
Her eyes had gone clear of glazed, grinding thought, and clouded with a lust that called Ben like a fucking siren. He was a strong man, but not strong enough for this. Things like will and resolve didn’t matter when She looked at him like that. When Her hands were curled on Ben’s arm, and her breathing was ragged in a way that made things feel right, and there was a little bit of fucking drool lining her lips. The limo was starting to be washed in a golden haze that meant she was turned on and probably fucking soaking her underwear, so nobody would be strong in this situation. Every other single asshole would want to make good on those promises, because they were to Her and she was perfect.
Ben was either about to try and secretly fuck her in front of everyone, or try the proposal again, so or everyone’s sake, it was good they arrived within the next few seconds. If they did try to fuck the secret thing wouldn’t last a damn minute, and if Ben proposed—the right way—they’d definitely be fucking, loud and hard and wet, after. And even if Hughie and Annie had heard about how good Ben fucked Her, they still weren’t allowed to see it.
Butcher twisted around from the front, his eyes landing on Her as he said Her name. “You’re gonna need to wear a fuckin disguise, we ain’t able to risk anyone figurin out who you are.”
She rolled Her eyes, dramatically pulling her sunglasses out of her jacket and placing them on her face. “Good?”
Butcher frowned, turning to Hughie. “Oi, lad. Give her your fucking cap.”
“My-“
“I’ve got it.” Annie tossed Her a black baseball cap from across the limo, giving Butcher a flat, annoyed look. “Hughie doesn’t have a hat, asshole, it’s mine-“
“Don’t matter whose hat it is, long as she,” Butcher jerked his head to Her. “Is the one wearin it. Indoors too, Love, I ain’t lookin for Homelander to drop through the ceiling-“
“Keep your tits on, Butcher.” She plopped the cap on her head with another sweeping, sarcastic gesture. “Everyone ready?”
MM nodded. “Grace is already there, so hopefully we won’t have a wait time. Everyone try to be diplomatic for once in your lives, don’t say something you don’t think over five fucking times in your head, and no weapons.”
Everyone looked at Ben and Butcher.
“That cunt is a bloody weapon, I’m takin my gun-“
“I’ll do whatever the fuck I want-“
“Both of you,” She glared between Ben and Butcher, voice not as loud as theirs, but with a threat of violence that made even Butcher snap his jaw closed. “Shut the fuck up. No weapons in the White House. Near the president. Ben, you are a weapon, we’ll be fine. Butcher, if you remind the fucking secret service that Ben and I are weapons, they’ll make us wait outside, and you’ll be fucked. You need me for this, I’ve put the whole thing together. Got it?”
Ben made a grumbled agreement, and Butcher scowled, pulling out at least fifty fucking guns and placing them in the passenger’s seat, glaring at Her the whole time. She gave them both a pretty, smug smile, and pulled Ben with her, out of the limo.
As they walked through the halls of the White House, flanked by many, incredibly fucking useless secret service agents—Her hand over Ben’s, on her shoulder, warmer than usual but not smoking—Ben nudged her shoulder.
You look fucking hot when you order everyone around, Sunshine.
She huffed a small laugh. You always think I look hot.
Because you’re always fucking hot-
I think. She smiled up at him, squeezing his hand. That I could eat vomit and roll in shit, and you’d still think I’m hot.
You would be.
I would objectively not be-
Yes, you fucking would be. Ben kissed Her brow. You’re objectively hot all the goddamn time.
And you’re an incredibly biased party, Benjamin, my love.
Ben almost picked her up and to fuck her on one of these stupid fancy benches in the halls. The only thing that stopped him was a secret service agent, coming to a halt in the hall with no warning.
“Christ, you pussy-“
Her free hand shot up, covering Ben’s mouth. “Is this it?”
The agent nodded, and started listing off a bunch of fucking rules that Ben didn’t care about. Not when Her eyes had gone glass-like once more, and her heart was stumbling in her chest.
You’ve fucking got this, Sunshine. We’re going to be fine.
I know. She let out a long, slow breath, and leaned into Ben slightly. Ready?
Fucking born it.
Singer was at the center of the table—in the same spot as last time—with Mallory on one side and a man Ben had never seen before on the other.
Ben hated him. She was perfect and beautiful, and Todd Muller was a slimy-looking weasel-fuck, wearing a red tie Ben wanted to strangle him with and looking at them with gleaming eyes Ben wanted to stab. The man hadn’t even spoken, and Ben’s fists were already goddamn curling at his side. There was something in him that told Ben wrong. Bad, vile, fucking wrong, and it came from Her. When the man smiled, a crude cold smirk that made Ben feel like he’d been shoved into a fucking swamp, the warning became an alarm, and Her grip on Ben’s hand over her shoulders started to smoke.
Muller—it was fucking Muller, Mallory had made some introductions that Ben barely heard over the blood lining his every thought—wouldn’t stop looking at Her, and Ben had to fight every fucking urge in his body to just step in front of her.
And when Muller said Her name—said it fucking wrong, with no love and only callous venom—Ben thought his jaw might crack.
“You’re looking healthy for a dead girl.”
“Todd.” Her voice was bored and cold, Her heart pounding like a fucking war drum. “You’re looking like a bitch ass cock guzzler.”
Even with the tension in the air—wired and electric and set to detonate—Ben still had to cough to cover his laugh, and Muller’s eyes shot to his.
“Soldier Boy,” a hand was extended over the table. Ben forced himself not to break it. “Big fan-“
“Don’t be.” Her voice was dry. “He’s a Phillies fan.”
Brat.
Cunt. A small smile tugged at Her lips, even as Muller’s attention returned to her.
“You’ve been busy,” Muller said Her name again, and Ben was going to pull out his tongue. “Learning about baseball, getting your fifteen minutes of fame, never bothering to tell your mother and me that you were alive-“
“I’d been dead to you and Mom for years,” She shrugged. “What’s legal death to being locked out and left to fend for myself?”
“And I see you’re still a little-“
“Secretary Muller.” Mallory’s voice was even and cool, and she didn’t even fucking look at Her or Ben. “We agreed to keep personal lives out of this meeting.”
Muller’s face twitched, but he fell back into his seat, eyes still trained on Her and Ben.
“Alright, let’s get this shit over with.” Singer nodded to the chairs before them. “Sit, so we can talk like damn adults.”
MM cleared his throat as they all sat, nodding to a silent, bored-looking Singer. “Thank you for seeing us again, sir.”
“Don’t.” Singer sighed, rubbing at his beard. “If I don’t follow up with you dumbasses, the brit,” he jerked his head to Butcher, who winked. “Will probably start sendin death threats and bombs to my family. But I ain’t here to small talk or do fucking therapy sessions, so I’m just gonna say it.” Singer sighed, looking around the room. “You’re not gettin any V. You’ve been determined to be a liability and are being ordered to explore other avenues to eliminate Homelander.”
The shocked, angry silence only lasted a moment before the room erupted in protests. Butcher shouting about Singer being a bloody fuckin cunt idiot, MM and Annie trying to provide reason, and Hughie trying to make everyone stop yelling.
But She was silent, watching Muller. No smoke, no screams, only a pure, horrid sense of wrong and sick in Ben’s body.
Ben. She didn’t look at him, but squeezed his arm. Don’t freak out.
What-
She coughed, a tiny amount of fire escaping her mouth, the whole room erupted in clicks of guns. All fucking aimed at Her. The only thing that kept Ben only rigid and alert at Her side, instead of launching himself over her body and bashing in the brains of any pussy that dared to fire, was Her quick, sharp glance in his direction, and smooth words in his head.
I’ve got this.
She had this. Ben was right here, killing anyone who fired was still very much an option, and she had this. She was leaning over the table, eyes flicking between Singer, Muller, and Mallory, and she had this.
“What exactly about us is a liability?” She asked, tilting her head in mock thought. “That would justify you refusing to provide us with the only definitive weapon against Homelander?”
“Your team has proven reckless,” Singer held Her gaze, which was a little fucking admirable. Ben had seen fucking Butcher stop talking under that glare, and Singer didn’t even seem to have the cocky death-wish Butcher had. “Countless times. Truth-con, both of Firecracker’s rallies, Tek Knight’s club massacre, the Believe Expo, and that’s just off the top of my damn head. We’re past takin gambles that don’t pay off, and this is a massive gamble that we ain’t able to afford.“
“How so?” She blinked at Singer, her face innocent and her fingers tapping on the table. “This is not a gamble. V will incapacitate Homelander.”
“On your word.” Muller sneered. “All we have is your word, and there’s nothing to stop you from simply taking the V for your own use.”
She scoffed, giving Muller a bored, amused look. “That can’t possibly be your real excuse. Half of us are already supes, and the other half hate supes-”
“I don’t hate supes-“
Hughie’s mumble was cut off by Mallory’s curt, snapped words. “You have all been known to make questionable moves.”
This time, Butcher laughed. “Come off it, Grace. Questionable moves is real high and fuckin mighty from you-“
“I have always remained within the bounds of the law-“
“The law,” She drawled. “Is not the end all be all of morality. We need to kill Homelander. This will help us. There isn’t another way. So please give me one really good reason why you can’t spare one vial of V so we can eliminate the most dangerous man alive.”
There was a beat of tight, furious silence, and then Singer stood.
“Grace, Todd,” he flattened his suit, letting out a labored breath. “I got a fuckin country to run, deal with this. You dumbasses,” he nodded across the table to the Boys. “Are real lucky we’re still housing and entertaining you. And you,” Singer said Her name, and the whole world was lined in red. “Consider playing that role you designed for yourself, if you’re so fuckin committed to the safety of our country.”
Ben felt his fists curl, and Butcher looked like he would’ve stood up and tackled Singer down had it not been for the countless fucking guns still trained on their heads.
Muller cleared his throat as the door, and their last fucking hope, closed. “We have determined that the pitch comes from a non-lucid party-“
“Shut the fuck up, Todd.” She wrinkled Her nose, lip curling. “Just say it’s because of me, so we can all move on.”
“You are not important enough for this call to be made in your name-“
“Try again.”
“Homelander is a chronic threat of unfathomable proportion. You are not qualified to handle such a delicate situation-“
“Wrong.” She shrugged, and Ben felt like he was watching a sparring match. Muller’s face was growing more and more red, and Her breathing more mechanical, both close to snapping, but she still pushed on. “I am qualified. I have field experience, and I’m literally a doctor. And you used chronic wrong. That’s not what it means-“
“I do not care what it means,” Muller hissed. “You are not stable or reliable, and we will not put the most dangerous drug in history into the hands of an over-emotional girl.”
The table cracked under Ben’s hands, and something fucking dangerous crossed over Her face.
“Oh, fuck.” MM muttered, leaning back in his chair and running a hand over his face as the air of the room started to wave in the heat.
“So,” Her words were slow, wrathful. “You are risking America, risking the fucking world, because you think I’m the same unstable teenager I was thirteen fucking years ago.”
Muller didn’t waver. “I believe you are the same girl you were because you are spoiled and believe you are owed something from the world. We are not a weapons bank-”
“I am not owed V, it’s the only weapon to hold down Homelander that we have!” Her voice was growing louder, the room crackling with heat. “I want to kill my fucking abuser, that’s not spoiled-“
“And she’s helped us!“ Annie jumped in, glaring at Muller. “She’s not spoiled, she’s made a lot of the hard calls-“
“Starlight,” Mallory muttered, shooting Annie a look. “Drop it.”
“No, Mallory! This is insane, you can’t think this is the best choice-“
“This is the president’s call-“
Butcher let out a cold, angry laugh. “You ain’t ever been this much of a bureaucratic bitch before, Grace-“
“Times are changing, Butcher-“
“And Grace here,” Muller gave Mallory a cold smirk. “Still wants to be in the running for the sweet VP spot. So now isn’t the time to disagree with Mr. President.”
MM gaped at Mallory. “Are you being serious, Grace-“
“Oh, she is,” Muller turned his grin to the team. “And she’s still trying to make up ground for letting her two most dangerous and unreliable weapons,” his twisted gaze turned to Her and Ben. “Fall in love. What did you drug him with,” Muller sneered Her name. “To get Soldier Boy to follow you like a weak fucking baby?”
Ben still had to let Her handle it. Even as he felt so fucking cold, physically restraining himself from launching across the table at Muller, he had to let Her handle it.
“Ben isn’t weak, or a baby.“ She lifted her chin at Muller, and Ben swore he saw something fucking spark in the air. “And I’m not like you, Todd. I don’t need to offer someone something for them to love me.” A cold, hollow smirk played across Her lips. “Tell Mom I say hi, by the way.”
Muller’s eyes narrowed. “You whoring little bitch-“
That was fucking it. Fuck letting Her handle it, that was the fucking line.
Ben shot to his feet, letting the table crack further under his fist, and Muller’s words faded off.
“Don’t ever fucking speak to her like that again in your pathetic, pussy life,” Ben growled. “Or I’ll fucking kill you.”
“Soldier Boy-“
Ben ignored MM’s low warning. “And you should count yourself real fucking lucky, because otherwise I’d break your fucking skull right goddamn now.”
Muller cleared his throat, and a flash of fear crossed his face. “Careful, Soldier Boy.” Muller said, voice less smug and assured as he straightened his already too-straight tie. “Or we’ll find some Agent Orange and put you back in the box, and she won’t have anyone to do her dirty work.”
Ben could hear the fucking drums. He hadn’t heard the drums like this in months, but they were pounding in his head. Not from Muller—he could throw his against the wall and crack his spine without a thought—but from the thought of leaving Her alone. Failing Her again, leaving Her and Ryan to fight Homelander alone. And the drums beat with the knowledge that She’d burn herself out to wake Ben up, and he could never fucking let that happen-
“You won’t get near him,” She hissed. “Or I’ll burn your dick off, and your fancy house down. And you,” Her wrath turned to Mallory, her words measured and toxic. “Are fucking pathetic. You know this is the wrong call, and you’re just letting it happen. Actually do something to kill Homelander, or deal with the consequences of him being alive.”
She stood, looping Her arm through Ben’s. We need to leave, now.
We’re not going fucking anywhere without the V-
Ben. Her voice was firm in his head, and Ben realized her heart had slowed. Trust me.
“Oi, where are you-“
“We’re done here,” She announced over Butcher, giving the team sharp, pointed looks. “Thank you,” She gave Mallory and Muller a too sweet, toxic smile. “For absolutely fucking nothing.”
The rest of their team exchanged confused looks, their mouths opening and closing in protest, but She was on a strange sort of warpath. Pulling Ben behind Her into the hall, barely looking back to see their team scramble up as she turned to face Ben.
Take my phone.
What the fuck are you-
We’re not getting the V, Muller is the leak.
How do you-
He said Agent Orange. You told me Frenchie used that for his gas, that Sage based Hers on. Nobody except the Boys, Homelander, and Sage know that. It’s him. But we’ll be fine, you just need to play the music-
How the goddamn Christ is music going to help-
Neuman said they had a backup of V, that isn’t under the pentagon's control. I’m going to find it, and I need you to play a song, any song, really fucking loud. Don’t stop until I tell you to. Please.
Ben nodded, putting Her rapid word in order in his own head. They didn’t have the V. There was more V, that wasn’t under the pentagon’s—Muller’s—control. She needed him to play music. Ben could defiantly fucking play music.
He took Her phone, and she glanced behind him as their team stumbled into the hall.
“Love, we ain’t fuckin done here-“
“Listen to me, Butcher.” Her voice was controlled and firm, and Ben glanced up from her phone to see that sharp, almost hazardous focus in her eyes. “We need to go now. I need to have my back here, please.”
Butcher blinked, and—by some fucking miracle—nodded. “Let’s bloody get a move on, then.”
“Butcher-“
“Nah, Mate.” Butcher cut off MM with a shrug, sticking his hands in his pockets. “We ain’t gettin shit out of those cunts. Let’s cut our losses and move.”
“That’s,” Annie frowned, watching Butcher carefully. “Uncharacteristically forgiving of you-“
“What can I say, I’m a changed fuckin man. Let’s go.”
MM, Annie, and Hughie exchanged looks, but before they could protest further, Ben felt Her bump his shoulder, her eyes fixed behind him.
Now.
He didn’t think about what he was playing, because it didn’t fucking matter. It was fucking loud, and it caused the team to jump slightly and give him odd looks, but She nodded. And that’s what fucking mattered.
And then She fucking vanished, like she had at Red River. Something rushed through Ben’s body—indescribable and elusive and not wrong but strange—the world practically stuttered, and She was gone.
Annie’s mouth fell open. “Where-“
“Oh, shit.” Hughie looked over at Ben, his voice muffled by the blasting vocals and drums and guitar. “She’s-“
Ben didn’t want to talk over the music. He didn’t understand how this weird fucking power of Hers worked—She’d explained it a few times, and he’d still gotten lost in Her pretty eyes and big words—and now wasn’t the time to pull experiments with it. So, he just gave Hughie a sharp nod, and waited.
Butcher didn’t seem phased by this in the goddamn slightest, looking around the hall and rolling his eyes before starting for the exit.
A secret service agent blocked his path, and an argument started about turning off the music and where is the sixth member of your party—MM grunted something about the bathroom, and they seemed to buy it—but Ben didn’t fucking hear any of it. She was taking too long, there wasn’t any telling where the fuck She’d gone, and Ben could feel Her tugging him with the Pigeon instinct—he was worried out his damn mind, and She’d never get to know he’d called it that—from deep in the building.
Then She started drawing closer, back to Ben, and the instinct started to grow electric and feral. She was closer, and something felt sick, and he should just fuck this and go fucking find her-
She was walking down the hallway, and, without a word, looped Her arms through Ben’s.
Go.
Ben didn’t stop playing the music—despite the many people in suits glaring at him—as She half-marched down the hall. Her face was too neutral, almost statue-like, and she still wasn’t speaking. Ben could swear he could hear Her fucking singing, like a ghost or phantom on the wind, but Her mouth was closed.
They made it out. The rest of their team still looked tense and confused, and She was still being so fucking weird, but they’d made it the fuck out. Ben knew She was with them—he could feel Her humming and taut somewhere in his head—but she still didn’t speak.
Butcher started driving, and when they crossed the lines out of DC, Ben finally felt a tug of his arm.
Off.
When the song stopped and Ben looked back to Her, tucked against his side, her eyes were far away, and he could hear Her fucking brain moving.
“You gonna bloody explain whatever the fuckin hell you just pulled-“
“Drive, Butcher.” She snapped, eyes still glazed over. “Fast.”
The ride was silent for another ten minutes. The didn’t have the V. They were out of fucking options, and they still had to figure out the Cornucopia, and they were fucked-
Ben.
He glanced down at Her, and found her staring at him. What-
I got it.
You-
I followed Mallory and Muller to the oval office, which is like, really small by the way-
Ben grunted Her name, trying to keep her perfect, too fast mind on one track. What the fuck did you get.
The location. Of the executive V. It’s in a warehouse in Boston.
Ben nodded slowly. So let’s go fucking get it.
We need to deal with Edgar first. She sighed, leaning her head on his shoulder. No loose ends. We can’t get this wrong.
She squeezed Ben’s hand—resting on her waist—and cleared her throat.
Ben frowned. You’re telling them-
Everything. “Butcher, pull over.”
“We’re on the fuckin freeway-“
“So find a rest stop or take the next exit.”
Ben could hear Butcher’s sigh, but the ass wasn’t stupid enough to keep arguing—not when Her tone was so flat and forceful, her face painted in a tight, resolved look—so they were parked within two minutes.
“Can I, uh,” Hughie coughed. “I need to go to the bathroom-“
“Hold it, lad.” Butcher twisted in his seat, shooting Her a glare. “The fuck was all that-“
“I’m going to talk, and you’re all going to listen. No talking until I’m done.” She looked around the team, leaning forward. “Got it?”
They got some nods and mumbled agreements—everyone glancing at Ben’s set, purposefully unreadable face like he had shit to say—and She let out a long, heavy breath. Ben’s hand moved to Her thigh, steadying her heart a little further, and she began.
“We have a leak. I caught it when we met with Edgar, who’s probably doing some cloak and dagger double-agent bullshit, because he knew stuff only Sage and Homelander would know. And I wasn’t sure, but then Ashley jumped ship and confirmed it-“
Annie blinked. “Ashley-“
“Jumped ship.” She snapped, fingers tapping on Ben’s hand. “At Red River. Don’t get mad at Hughie, I told him to keep it quiet while we were in DC. Ashley’s staying with Neuman, and they’ve both confirm that there’s a leak in either the government or CIA. It’s the government, because it’s Muller. I don’t,” She sighed, chewing on her lips. “I don’t know what the fuck Muller is doing, or what Sage promised him to flip, but it’s him. It’s probably the real reason why we didn’t get the V, but it’s fine. I,” She reached into her jacket, pulling out a folded up piece of paper. “Fixed it. Neuman told me there was an off-site stash of V for the government. Off the books, probably part of a deal for the government to help fund Red River. And I’ve got its location.” She leaned forward, passing the paper over to Annie. “Boston docks warehouse. We’ll need to take care of Edgar first, but that’s it. That’s our shot.”
The limo was silent as MM and Hughie leaned over Annie’s shoulders, all three of them reading the paper—likely just some fucking evidence—and Butcher scowled at the air.
“So,” Butcher drawled. “All we gotta do is go to Boston, nab some fuckin V from the federal government, and we’re bloody golden and set?”
“Unless we fuck up,” She shrugged. “Yeah. And we can clean up Muller and Ashley after, but I think we need to clear Edgar first. He’s actually dangerous, and I’m not sure if he’s playing us or Sage. Muller’s just an idiot, and Ashley’s out of the picture for now.”
“All she told you was there was a leak?” MM looked up from the paper with a frown. “Nothing else?”
“She recorded Sage. And if she’s trying to infiltrate us, I burned out her tracker and she doesn’t have her phone. Neuman will keep an eye on her, and she won’t get anywhere close enough to us to get useful information for Sage.”
“And how do you know Muller is the leak-“
“Butcher,” She cut off MM with a sigh. “What did Frenchie use to make the gas, when you met with Homelander and Sage in January?”
Butcher frowned, something flashing in his eyes. “Agent Orange.”
She nodded, and turned to Hughie and Annie. “And what did Sage base her gas on?”
“Oh, God.” Annie shook her head, realization flashing in her eyes. “That’s not good-“
“What gas does Sage have?” MM grunted, looking around the limo. “None of you motherfuckers mentioned gas-“
“It’s against me,” Ben grunted, and felt Her hand cover his, still on her leg. “Homelander tried to use it during the tower fight. Pussy said Sage designed it after Frenchie’s.”
“And only we know that,” Hughie mumbled. “Us and Vought. Shit-“
“That’s how I know it’s Muller,” She muttered. “And that’s how I know this is it. The V is there,” She nodded to the paper, slightly crumpled in Annie’s hands. “And we’re going to get it.”
There was another moment of silence, broken by Butcher once more.
“That it, Love?”
She nodded. “That’s it. We’re fucking finishing this.”
End Note: For such a stoic and emotionally stunted character, all of the Ben centric chapters sure do contain a lot of emotion.
Thank you for reading!! If you like this story, please reblog, share, or leave a comment! <3
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DP x DC prompt #11
[Insert DC magic user] explores some ancient ruins said to have had something to do with the strongest cosmic entity in all the realms, and when they finally get to the central chamber, all they find is the BOOmerang
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Heroes & Villains The DC Animated Universe - Paper Cut-Out Portraits and Profiles
Despero
A native of the alien world of Kalanor, the being who would come to be known as Despero was a peasant born with a deformity. This deformity, a third eye in the center of his forehead, caused him to be cast out from his community and he solemnly wandered the wastelands of his planet. On this journey he encountered the mystical Flame of Py'tar. The cosmic entity infused him with great physical strength and mental powers, which he could project through his third eye.
Dubbing himself 'Desparo,' he used his newfound powers to subjugate much of the populace of Kalanor. The world was transformed into a paradise, yet one that was ruled tyrannically by Despero, who callously eliminated anyone who did not bend to his psychic whim.
Unsatisfied with simply ruling his own world, Despero began a campaign on galactic conquest, attempting to take over neighboring planets throughout his solar system. These activities came to the attention of the Green Lantern Corps. The Corps attempted to intervene but they too were overwhelmed by Despero’s psychic powers.
The matter was discovered by Green Lantern John Stewart of the Justice League. Stewart and The League intervened yet were initially defeated by Desparo. The tide turned when J’onn J’onzz used his own telepathy to communicate with the Flame of Py’tar.
The Flame had always meant to transform Kalanor into a paradise yet it had been coopted and twisted by Desparo’s anger. Freed from Desparo, The Flame of Py’tar took revenge on Desparo, enveloping the tyrant into a large tree. This freed his countless followers and brought peace and prosperity to Kalanor.
The fantastic Keith David provided the voice for Desparo with he villain featuring in the ninth episode of the second season of Justice League, ‘Hearts and Minds Part I.’
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Is decreator possible
Of course!
DC characters - Decreator
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Animal Man: Buddy Baker and a manifestation of the Great Red Beast, modeled off Buddy's chimera animal form from the Vertigo run
One thing I wanted to do early on when developing the headverse was tie together the various systems of the DC multiverse closer together, kinda of inspired with what James Robinson was trying to do near the beginning of Earth-2, but got lost under later writers. Robinson explicitly tied Alan's powers to The Green, with Will Power acting more as a conduit than an abstract green goo energy source unto itself.
I always wanted to do something similar with the Red Lanterns being tied to The Red (or the Morphogenetic Field) and specifically a figure that ended being underutilized in Earth-2, The Great Red Beast.
So in canon, The Great Red Beast ended up just being a transformed Yelena Montez, trapped in that state after accessing The Red. Since its a parallel universe, any relationship between The Beast and The Butcher (Earth-1/Earth-0's Red Lantern Entity) is never explicated upon. Which, to be fair, there's no look into whether Earth-2's other Light Spectrum Avatars have equivalents to Ion, Adara, Nekron, or the Life Entity, but The Beast is so similar its counterpart that it's a little strange not to dig into.
This is all to say I want to take that canon and shift it a bit so that Avatars of the Red are, in a way, a different group of Red Lanterns. Red Lanterns on a cosmic level all exist as extensions of Atros becoming Atrocitus and manipulating the narrative to make himself THE Red Lantern through which all others become tools of his rage, even as Red Lantern stories have shown characters like Bleez, Rankorr, and even Dex-Starr becoming more self-aware and operating independently of Atros' will.
Buddy, Vixen, Beast Boy, and to a degree even Wildcat (Ted, Yelena, and Tommy) all kind of exist as possible examples of another way to exist as Red Lanterns, with Brother Blood being the counterpoint that wants to embrace Atrocitus and his discipline.
idk I haven't typed out a big lore dump on one of these posts in a while and wanted to get some thoughts out and collected.
tl;dr Animal Man is a Red Lantern in my au
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You know how in things like Marvel and DC comics the cosmic entities, like Eternity, look like stars and galaxies while their lighted parts are hard colored? Maybe there could be a bunny with that style?
Strange Rabbits - Dark Kin
Check out my Patreon here!
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I cringe every time I see Justice League International/America put as essential reading for Ted Kord/Blue Beetle 2. Like no, just cause it was long-running and popular and referenced by a bunch of things, since Ted was OOC the entire time in JLI that's not essential reading for him.
This is what I've read so far that gives a good feel for Ted Kord/Blue Beetle and what he's about where he's reasonably in character:
Captain Atom (1966-1967) #83-86- Ted's first comics. Look out for period typical sexism
Blue Beetle (1967-1968) #1-5- Ted's first solo comics. Look out for period typical sexism and racism. Ted's ok with killing bad guys/won't lose sleep about it if it happens. My girl, the MVP Tracey is here as Ted's gf, lab assistant, and confidant. Issue 5 has Vic Sage/The Question showing up in his civilian persona and helping out Blue Beetle.
Charlton Portfolio (1974) #1- Ted's civilian persona gets blamed for murder and the theft of an invisibility suit. Has the first mini-Bug/Snoopy for spying on shit. Tracey defends her man's honor and chews people out for bad-mouthing Ted.
Charlton Bullseye (1981) #1- Blue Beetle 2 and The Question team up officially as superheroes taking on a villain with many mooks and death traps. Also, this story implies that Ted has been Blue Beetle for at least 10 yrs. The Question calls Blue Beetle his friend and thinks they make a good team.
Crisis on Infinite Earths (1985) #1-3 [you can read more if you want but he's less prominent the further the Crisis goes on]- Ted's DC universe debut as part of the Earth 4 crew. This Ted has the Scarab and it can work as demon repellant and keep him from getting disintegrated from being touched by antimatter demons. Ted is cosmically important enough to be Earth 4's representative!
Secret Origins (1986) #2- Dan and Ted's origins are retold to fit in the DC universe. Ted does not have the Scarab. Red-head curly-haired Ted!
Blue Beetle (1986) #1-24- Ted's DC solo run. Red-head curly-haired Ted! Ted has no confidence for his secret identity which causes drama. His girlfriend/lab assistant is Melody Chase. In issues 5-7, Vic Sage/The Question teams up with Blue Beetle 2 for an arc. This run has crossovers with Legends (1986) and Mellinium (1988). Ted also starts appearing in Justice League International (1987)[boo, hiss, thankfully JLI didn't affect the plots of Ted's solo unlike the crossovers]
Showcase (1994) #2-4- Set in JLI era but Ted is pretty much himself. Ted fights cops and a city's local government b/c they stole his patents and they're fascists and he doesn't vibe with that.
L.A.W.: Living Assult Weapons (1999) #1-6- This series is racist trash propaganda. You mostly just want the first two and last two issues for Ted stuff. Ted decides to retire from being a superhero at the end of this series.
Birds of Prey (1999) #2, 4, 7, 10, 15, 19, 22-25, 33-37, 39-42- Ted makes a number of cameos initially via chatting online with Oracle as her friend. Then meeting up for an in-person date. Then coming out of retirement and joined the Birds of Prey on missions as support and a driver primarily. Then Ted gets diagnosed with a degenerative heart condition and retires again.
Robin (1993) #96- Ted teaming up with Tim Drake/Robin to track down a Jokerized werecat. Ted charms and scores a date with one of Dick Grason/Nightwing's civilian love interests.
Convergence: Blue Beetle (2015) #1-2- A return of pre-DC Ted! Set on Earth 4's Hub City kidnapped by some cosmic entity pitting heroes against each other with the survival of their cities on the line. Blue Beetle, The Question, and Captain Atom vs the Legion of Super-Heroes. My girl Tracey is here! As Ted's copilot!
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Marvel creates teams, DC creates characters.
Disclaimer: this is a gross over simplification and greatly limited to the comics that I have read. I can think of dozens of examples that do not fit these observations, but it's what I've been noticing as I (an X-Men kid) fell deep into DC over the past many months. TLDR at the end.
Marvel is incredible at writing teams. Look at how well balanced their x-men adjacent stories are—both within the individual groups and within mutantdom as a whole—and compare that to the absolute mess of the JLA or any of DC’s crossover groups above 2 members.
But, DC knows how to write individuals and (when they’re small) their support networks. Where as Marvel, with the exception of Peter Parker, consistently falls flat and struggles to write compelling individual arcs that don’t rely on external characters or world events.
So much of this has to do with how the franchises were created in the first place.
The JLA is a an awkward mismatch of individually created characters and franchises whose only justifications for working together can be massive multiverse-ending events. This leads to a never ending slew of crossover stories where each issue is 70% dense exposition of stakes that are too high to matter and 10% visually discordant fight scenes. The remaining 20% is split between the characters that bring in the readers (Superman and Batman) and the characters without a solo run—leaving all others as background fodder. The villains are only repeats of an individual franchises. There are no JLA-specific villains (aside from bland cosmic entities) because the JLA is not a team, it is a crossover.
Marvel, whose franchises centre on teams rather than individuals, can have a group (be they the Fantastic Four or the X-Force) focus on meaningful, local, character-driven stories. However, take a character out of their designated group and now you have one fifth of a whole acting as another team’s third wheel. Only long-time, well established characters (currently: Emma Frost), or those created as a solo adventurer (Deadpool), can break the mold. Ironically, I feel the Marvel Cinematic Universe betrayed the strength that Marvel’s comics have—by setting up each post-Civil War (and arguably earlier) Avenger as their own franchise it lost the balance of a team and became instead a crossover.
A point in DC crossovers’ favour, however, is that because all the world-changing events only happen when every major player is involved, they hit the whole world equally. Inner-franchise climaxes don’t become large enough that they should disrupt others. It’s believable (somewhat) that each hero family stays in their own city—a major event to Green Arrow isn’t effecting the Amazons, and vice versa. In contrast, because the groups in Marvel get so big, their problems and scope can get even larger. What happens in one stream (say, the mutants terraforming Mars) should have massive effects on everyone, but it rarely does. (To be fair, I think Marvel has been doing an overall good job at balancing this recently).
The individual based module also works great for minor crossovers. But, this only works so long as the pairing stays small—Superman and Batman can have many team ups against new and original villains, whereas mutant/Avenger duos rarely happen and when they do, they stay firmly within their established franchises' concerns. Again though, these pair ups only work when they're small: compare World’s Finest issues that focus just on Superman, Batman, and Robin, with chaotic ones that cameo the whole JLA.
This isn't to say the individual method treats characters better, in fact, it often makes it worse. Lead characters must stay stagnant, their circumstances and relationships never changing. Side characters must fit their original archetypal role and purpose—if not, they're erased (adult Lana Lang), put in limbo (Tim Drake), or added to an ever increasing support team for a franchise not written for teams (basically everyone). When the X-Men needs novelty, they can just rearrange the roster. If a character no longer fits, they can join another subgroup or (albeit rarely and awkwardly) join another franchise's team (just look at Kitty Pryde's whole history). DC will never let Jason Todd escape Batman's shadow, because he was only ever built to orbit him.
Their treatment of the characters over the course of decades however, is different than its individual stories, and I would much rather pick up one of DC's short side character features than Marvel's. Within a short timeframe, the dynamics switch. Aside from when they're introducing a new mini-franchise, Marvel's short solos often work to push the plot of an adjacent team and the characters are reduced to pieces in a grander puzzle. DC's short solos in contrast exist to spotlight characters, allowing the autonomy and uniqueness that they may loose in the long run.
I don't know which I prefer. I'd love to see the writers/editors of Marvel take over DC for a few years, and vice versa. Might solve some problems.
TLDR: Marvel’s franchises are centred on large teams, and DC’s are on individuals. These both have their strengths and downfalls when it comes to crossovers.
When it comes to teams: The Justice League is a crossover group of individuals, not a team, only focusing on world-ending stories with no room for character arcs. But, the characters have a lot more mobility for small team-ups, and the world feels more cohesive. In comparison, Marvel’s teams are true, well balanced teams. But take a character out of a team, or do small scale crossovers, and they float awkwardly under developed. As large events and characters stay locked in their group franchises, Marvel as a whole feels split into disconnected parts.
When it comes to characters: DC allows for more short term solos but very limited long-term mobility, whereas Marvel characters aren't as stuck in archetypes, but short solos focus on contributing to grander plots rather than fleshing out niche characters.
#is this is missing a lot of nuance? absolutely#do I have a better overarching understanding of DC than Marvel? 100%#but this is me trying to formulate my thoughts from the past half year#dc comics#marvel comics#marvel#batman#Justice league#xmen#rambles
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IDEAS FOR DC COMICS X-MEN
Storm: Aina Akinrotimi, aYoruba woman born in Nigéria, is a spiritual daughter and reencarnation of the orisha deities Oiá (Iansã) and Xangô, inheriting their powers to control the thunder, lightning, wind and rain.
Can also spit fire from her mouth.
Has great ability with the sword, the dagger and the double ax.
Is claustrophobic due to having been a prisoner of the Shadow King in her childhood.
Phoenix: An Alaskan born doctor in Psychology and Genetics, airplane pilot, computer comunications officer and lieutenant of NASA, Madeline Jean Grey Pryor was born a mutant with strong telepathic and telecinetic powers. During a mission in space, the spaceship suffered an accident, and Madeline assumed the pilot duties to save the crew, doing an emergency landing that crossed trough the cosmic rays of a solar storm and falling in the planet Mars. As she recovered, Madeline discovered that the survival of her crew and herself was helped by the fact that a cosmic entity named the Phoenix fused itself with her, enhancing her powers beyond telecinetic control and reading human minds, but also reading the minds of animals and the memories of people contained in inanimate objects, flight, building and transforming objects trough the control of invisible molecules, and healing. Assuming the codiname Phoenix, Madeline started acting independently as a superheroine and political activisit for mutant rights, before joining the X-Men.
Wolverine: The 5'3 tall James Logan Howlett , who prefers to be called Logan, is a mutant with the powers of a fast healing factor, longevity, enchanced senses and bone retractible claws in his knucles born in Canada during the mid 19th century. Veteran of the American Civil War, Crimean War, First and Second World Wars and the Korean War, his longevity prowess in the battlefield made him a target of the High Evolutionary, who captured him to make a subject of his experiments, inserting adamantium to cover his bone claws (but avoiding doing the same to the rest of his skeleton, so as not to slow his healing factor and erase his agility).
Logan escaped before the High Evolutionary could furter experiment on him, living for years as a mercenary spy for the Canadian and British inteligences, until befriending and joining the X-Men, who remind him how fight for something bigger than mere survival: an ideal, to help others find freedom, justice and equality.
Nightcrawler: A kind hearted, romantic and adventurous blue fuzzy, point ears, pointy tailed man, looking like a mix between an elph and a demon, is a circus acrobat, aeriealist and trapeze artist who became the founder and leader of the X-Men. Has teleportation powers, and is a fast and graceful swordsman, who can pilot airplanes and zeppelin airships, acting as the captain of a pirate crew.
Archangel: An Earth born descendant of Tanagarians, kidnapped as a baby and raised by Apocalypse to be his Emissary of Death, a young Angel revolted against his adoptive father when he saw the complexity of human lives and how many people are determined to fight in protecting Earth and its inhabitants (even when many humans act prejudiced and ungrateful against metahumans, mutates, mutants and aliens). Behind the brave and stoic Avenging Archangel, is the adventurous archeologist, history and theology professor Warren Hal Warthington.
Dazzler: A competent, graduation diploma aprooved lawyer, the passion of Alison Blaire always has been performing. Dreaming of becoming an aclaimed singer and actress, she naively signed a contract to perform in an underground theater.
The performance in question was actually fighting to the death in a gladiator arena against other mutants for the amusement of rich patrons of the Hellfire Club.
Finding the situation revolting, Alison encouraged and led the other gladiators into a huge revolt.
This was the moment in which she decided to adopt the codiname Dazzler, both as a feisty superheroine, and as a performer who uses her music both to touch listeners with beauty, and to inspire compassion, solidarity and social change.
Colossus: Born and raised in a collective farm in Soviet Russia, Piotr Rasputin is a tall, strong, yet calm and gentle man, with a great talent for drawing, spinning, weaving and sewing. Has the mutant power to transform his skin into a strong, impenetrable organic armour, similar to metal. Captured by agents of the Hellfire Club to become a gladiator, became a great friend of Dazzler after she helped him and the others to fight back and escape. Is the person who makes the clothes for her to perform on stage, as well as all the X-Men's battle uniforms.
Beast: Found trapped like an animal in a zoo cage and rescued by Phoenix, Henry 'Hank' Philip McCoy, is a mutant with long arms of large hands and long legs of large feet, that make him move with great agility, balance and dexterity, gifted with genius level scientific intelect, a healing factor, enhanced senses, super strenght, fangs, an ability to emit mood altering pheromones, and a body fully covered in thick greyish-blue fur, acompanied by black hair with shades of dark-blue and silver over his head.
Is an athlete experienced in American Football and wrestling, an expert in biology, genetics, chemistry, eletrical and computer engineering, always curious to learn speaking new languages, and a lover of classic literature and the arts.
Showing a light hearted sense of humor, overall prefers to behave in a level headed, diplomatic way ... but knows how to use violence when necessary, and his strenght in combat must not be underestimated.
Banshee: An irish woman who has powers of releasing thundering sonar waves with her scream, originally was a sailor before joining the X-Men. Is a great navigator and cartographer, and the person who gives a home for every X-Men to live, in an old Castle fused to a Lighthouse known as Cassidy Keep, located in County Mayo, Ireland.
Rogue: A young woman who survived hiding in the sewers after her parents rejected her for being a mutant. Has the power to take away other people's memories, abilities, energy and powers with the touch of her skin, along with super strenght and the gift to fly. Slowly learns to trust other people, loose her fears and insecutirities and control her powers with the help of her new friends of the X-Men. Loves trains, collecting and playing with trail models, having dreamed in her childhood of being a condutor, and plays folk, blues and rock music in an acoustic guitar that has written over its surface "This Machine Kills Fascists".
This is awesome
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