#damn it mr jalapeño

[lonely-sweetpotato]

*sigh*

PEOPLE SHOULD STOP TRYING TO MAKE ME FEEL SORRY FOR CALYPSO

[straightasaaro]

whose not fucking ready for the emotional repercussions of Epic the Musical ending?!

MEEEEE

[lidera-aro]

Imagine Odysseus taking one of those ‘who is your godly parent?’ Test(for fun ofc)

He gets Athena, and it’s rlly fluffy, happy mentor-mentee moment-

Until Hermes see that

He weeps(dramatically, ofc) so shocked about such a betrayal, Athena how dare you steal my great-grandson??

[zaronxyz]

Why must I be forced to write the ghost trio singing at the same time.... how do i even do that... damn you Mr jalapeño.... and damn musical formats making it hard to translate into prose....

[theshiningcrusader]

Okay I gotta ask

Who’re your favorite/least favorite creator curators?

For my faves i’d say Clive, Newton, Marlon (all time fave actually) and Marianne.

I don’t really have any least faves, im neutral to everyone else (though ngl Sirius Oculus has been on my mind for a hot minute)

From almost every game, my favorites curators/characters are (in no particular order); Uncle Jalapeño Dr. Herbert Higginbotham (NOT because of his name..) Avalon Centrifuge Eve Silva Paragorica Mrs. Sunshine The Hoard/any of the hoard characters Nana Pud Marlon Random I wooould say Newton?? It depends on the day though Papal Mache ALSO Marianne Noisette is soooo sweet :) I never got to play PS Vita but all of the characters in that damn storymode are so silly looking

[aludraslytherin]

I hate Calypso but DAMN her voice is ughhh

WHY Mr Jalapeños???

[firephoenix2305]

I HAVE SEEN THE VENGEANCE SAGA! (Visuals and all)

Once again, Mr. Jalapeño has fed us. And I'm feeling quite full.

Spoilers below the cut!! If you haven't watched it yet, kindly shoo.

...

I said SHOO

Okay.

I loved "Not Sorry for Loving You", Calypso's voice is just GORGEOUS. And need I mention how beautiful @gigizetz 's animatic for it was!!! THE SPIN SHOTS!!! Ugh, I am forever in love with Gigi's style.

"Dangerous" is still stuck in my head, and I'm afraid it will be for the next few...days? Months? Year? (The lil princess Winion though. Awww. Huge shoutout to Jorge's sis, she was stunning!)

"Charybdis" was fun! Loved the sound and the animatic. Very catchy, very very cool. Little but killer.

"Get in the Water". GET IN THE WATER WAS SO GOOD. I for the life of me ADORE Poseidon's voice. The visuals were STUNNING too!! All of Ody's men keeping him from drowning?! Are you kidding?! It was sooo cool! And the God Move! Ohohoho!

And, of course, POLITES JUMPSCARE O U C H. That "You can relax my friend" 🥹 (Jorge when I catch you)

Lastly. "Six Hundred Strike". I. I am speechless. The way I GASPED when I saw the 3D animation. God damn.

But my favorite animation in this saga (although it's close competition with Gigi's) has to be Gwendy's. (Which they did in collaboration with other people, if I remember correctly, so credit to them too, obviously).

That whole last section of Six Hundred Strike was. Just. Pure badassery in the form of a song. THE SILHOUETTES OF THEM BOTH AS ODY STABS POSEIDON OVER AND OVER! FUCK, THAT ANIMATION WAS STUNNING!

"After all you've done, how will you sleep at night?"

"Next to my wife"

DAMN.

[tamaruaart]

Hi :)

₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊

Questions:

About me ★ :

I mostly go by Tam or Rua but I also go by a LOT of other nicknames! (Tamarua, Tamari, Tama, Tamachi, Ruma, Tammy, Tamithy, etc... I'm on par with Mr Jalapeño fr 😼) I'm a digital & traditional artist and I mostly draw my OCs or characters I like.

I'm in A LOT of fandoms (LMK, JTTW, The Great Comet, Blood Meridian, Greek Myth, EPIC, Hamilton...). This blog respects and supports the LGBTQ+ community :> (WHERE ALL MY ACE BUDDIES AT??).

My preferred pronouns are She/They but I don't mind if you refer to me as a he/him. I'd say I don't usually get mad, and my humor is very... Uh, what's the word? Questionable? Yea, very questionable- I speak English and Croatian (🇭🇷)!

What art program do I use? ⁠★ :

I use Clip Studio Paint and Ibis Paint (If you want to know what brushes I use feel free to ask!)

Socials ⁠★ :

-Twitter: (@TamaRuaArt)

-Pixiv: (@Tamachi)

-Reddit: (@TamaRuaArt "Tam & Rua✩")

-tiktok: (@/tamaruaart "Tam✩")

-Bluesky: (@Tamtarua "Tam ‼️")

-Strawpage:

Rules? ⁠★ :

-No offensive comments on certain groups

-No NSFW in my asks or replies

-No politics nor my opinion on topics like abortion, sex work and generally those types of things. That is not for you to know!!

-Keep your comments relative to the post

-No heavy-religion based topics (Unless that's what the post is about)

-No racism nor racist jokes (this is supposed to be a safe space for ALL RACES)

-No sexism/misogyny/misandry (This is not a safe space for radical feminists who hate on men)

-No rebloging or replying to my posts with random shit, I don't find that funny

-No homophobia or transphobia (nor hate to any other sexuality), this is a safe space for LGBT!!

If you don't follow these I'm just going to block you :D

What is this blog mostly about? ⁠★ :

OCs!! Well, I mostly use it to talk about my JTTW/LMK OC Zhaoyan (or just Zhao).

Zhao is a Celestial Witch who was brought along to the journey (against her will) as a healer for Tripitaka. Basically, she has the power to heal any wound, illness, disease etc. And general sorcery.

Besides that it's just whatever this stupif mind of mine is currently hyperfixating on

Notes on your OC's story? ⁠★ :

For now my tumblr blog is the only place where you can find out about her.

I do 100% plan to write an AO3 fanfic regards her one day (because she honestly has so much lore that isn't even jttw/lmk related). But not any time soon, I'm very busy with school and I still have to work her whole character out before I start writing. When I do publish the story I'll announce it here :D

Is this blog R18?⁠ ★ :

Not really, I'd say more 13-14+

Suggestions/requests? ⁠★ :

Sometimes? But only for close moots

Do I do coms? ⁠★ :

no

wewooweoweewowweee

yes

My Playlists:

Zhaoyan but as a ⁠★ Playlist ★ :

Quanshuǐ but as a ⁠★ Playlist★ :

Concept Cabin:

The Vengeance AU ⁠★ :

Fandoms:

-Greek Mythology (Hades/Hades II, The Odyssey and The Iliad, Paris: The Musical, EPIC: The Musical. I dislike Madeline Miller and her Circe a lot though lmao)

-Lego Monkie Kid

-The Prince of Egypt

-Wolfwalkers

-Hamilton

-The Great Comet of 1812

-Blood Meridian (I'm adopting kid idc)

-Cookie Run Kingdom

-Dante's Inferno

-General Opera fan lol

-Shakespeare (Don't really watch the plays but I LOVE this man. Especially in Something Rotten. Like hello sailor)

-The Three Musketeers (In love w Aramis)

-Breza by Slavko Kolar (THIS STORY FUCKING RUINED ME. JANICA/YANITSA AND MARCO DESRVED BETTER)

If any of these things sound right up your alley, feel free to stay! :D

I mostly post about Greek Mythology, Blood Meridian and LMK on here though-

OC related things:

-OC introduction (Outdated, currently working on a new one!)★ :

-OC chibies ★ :

-OC (Zhao's) family tree ★ :

-OC ages ★ :

Free chibi OC commissions (closed):

TAGS:

OCs ⁠★ :

#lmk oc; Zhao- Any posts about Zhao

#lmk oc; Yueliang- Posts about Yue

#lmk oc; Quanshuǐ- Quanshuǐ posts

#lmk oc; Yuǎn'ān- Yuǎn'ān posts

Miscellaneous ★ :

#tam rambles- Pretty self-explanatory. Just me rambling

#tam answers- Answering asks

#my art- Art made by me! :D

#Polly & Olivia- Posts about my cats!

ALT account: @tam-and-her-bullcraps (beware for it's a mess there-)

Fundraisers, please do NOT come into my asks demanding money. I can't donate

And that's basically all you need to know about me

buh-bYEEEEE 👋

[sixcrowsbooks]

Damn you, Mr. Jalapeño. You’ve done it again.

[captainyaps]

Yk what I’d love to hear mr jalapeño talk about? The SOUND DESIGN of EPIC, because holy HELL, especially in Survive, the sound of the club hitting men, the crumbling of the rocks around Polyphemus as he falls, it’s all so damn good? HOW DID THEY DO IT?? Idk if he’s talked about it before and I somehow missed it, but that’s a lil video rambling I’d be super interested in seeing :)

[disabeetled]

since is 1am and im feeling a lil autistic,

heres a overly detailed and throughly sourced ketchup infodump.

yes, as in the condiment (or rather, class therof).

this will be a obnoxiously long post with a mommy baking blog like intro. you have been warned.

so, when i was very young, i was cruising in my parents car somewhere near compton to my recollection, and i saw a truck go by marketing Heinz jalapeño ketchup. being all of ~4 and only have been exposed to the American Heinz '57 Tomato Ketchup (and offbrand variants therof), i was like "hey wtf" to my parental units, who just kind of shrugged, as they didnt have a clue either.

I forgot about this encounter for about a decade, until someone in a Discord server i was in said "ketchup is just tomato smoothie," and then someone argued that it was jelly, and i remembered that snippet, and decided to Google, and was DELIGHTED by the answer and chaotic discussion that ensued.

OKAY so TOMATO Ketchup is a fairly recent invention, popularized in the US in the late 1800's with the birth of Heinz '57, which wasnt actually their 57th product, Mr. Heiz just decided that he wanted 57 recipies for his brand. He claimed that 5 was his lucky number and 7 was his wifes or something, thats why 57. HOWEVER, in the UK, there's a even older mushroom ketchup, and in the Philippines, there's banana ketchup, and theres black walnut ketchup, and apparently jalapeño ketchup... you get the point. what unites all these condiments is not there actually main ingredient, but rather, the side ingredients and the process of which they are turned into ketchup.

see, the key ingredient of ketchup are the vinegar and spices/seasonings (such as allspice, ginger, cumin, coriander, cloves, garlic, onion, mustard, etc) that go with it. the recipe itself is actually fairly ancient and originates somewhere in Asia- the working theories on how we got the name "ketchup" in the first place are that it comes from the Cantonese word 茄汁, literally keh-jup (pronounced similarly with the correct vocalizations) or that it came from a more regional Chinese dialect. theres another theroy tying it more to India, and honestly i dont think we will ever know for sure, because thats how damn old the stuff is!

The tomato ketchup us USAmericans know and stand by today debuted sometime in the late 1700's, around 1770 by some accounts. Heinz popularized it with '57, of course! fun fact: dictionaries in the U.S kept referencing non-tomato ketchup in their definitions until 1913, which was about 40 years after the Heinz tomato variant essentially killed the market for all the other stuff.

that's a brief history of ketchup, so yeah! hope you enjoy. I'll leave you with a few recipes to get your ketchup collection started and/or terrorize your friends with, as well as my fav article on this, though if im not mistaken all of this can be confirmed via a quick Google search.

Article

Banana Ketchup

Walnut Ketchup

Jalapeño ketchup

Fig ketchup

Mushroom ketchup

[imthebadguyyy]

Bucky Barnes X Reader

----------------------------

Natasha's sister. That's who she was. Not by blood, but by their bond. Both brought up in the Red Room, both master assassins, and both immensely loyal to each other. They were all each other had. Until the Blip. But even then, they had each other. They were always supposed to have each other. But Nat was a hero. And heroes are not meant to survive. So consumed by pain and heartbreak, her sister lives. Until Sam and Bucky turn up to her apartment one night with a mission.

----------------------------------------------

Noisy neighbors. Prying neighbors. Fake neighbors. Nice neighbors. Bearable neighbors.

She didn't really care. She was just sick of people. After refusing a lunch, aka gossip session at Mrs. Gordon's apartment for what felt like the bazillionth time, Y/N grabbed her keys and purse, and decided to go down to the pizza place down the road. Pizza made everything better. Hopefully. Pulling on her red leather jacket, that was once Natasha's she walked out, mentally preparing herself for the time where she would have to socialize with the over friendly waitress. Oh well. Pizza.

It was a chilly New York evening. Grateful for the warmth that her white turtleneck provided, Y/N shivered softly, as the wind blew a little harder. Soon the delicious smell of melting cheese wafted towards the h/c woman, making her tummy rumble. Practically shoving the door open, she walked up to the counter. "Can I get a medium sized New York Pizza, with jalapeños and pepperoni, with a glass of Cola ?" "Sure coming right up!! It's so good to see you here again Y/N !! You haven't come for a pizza in so long I thought you moved away or something" giggling, Cindy, the waitress, pulled the socially awkward woman into a hug. "O-okay heh heh" laughing awkwardly, she moved away to a table at the back, after paying. Praying that Cindy wouldn't come and strike a conversation, she began to daydream, or think rather, suddenly caught in a wave of memories, all concerning Natasha. Overcome with emotion, she began to choke on the memories, every breath becoming harder to take.

Maybe it was good that Cindy came with her food right then and offered her a warm smile, which seemed to help with her sudden anxiety as she stuttered out her thanks and tried to smile. The warmth from the pizza was comforting as she lifted a slice, oozing cheese. For the next 5 mins, she concentrated on her food, finding it stabilizing and delicious. All was great ! But of course. That wouldn't last.

"Well hello N/N. How surprising to find you in a pizza shop"

Sam.

A moment of silence.

"Hey doll."

Bucky.

It all threatened to overflow.

Every bit of sadness, anger, frustration, anxiety, heartbreak and loneliness she had felt over the past year or so threatened to tip over the surface. But she couldn't afford that happening. She was Y/N. An assassin. She was supposed to be STRONG. "For the love of God be strong" she mumbled in her mind.

As though sensing her conflict of emotions, Bucky moved to the seat next to hers, and hesitantly wrapped an arm around her shoulders. The comfort and simplicity and intimacy of the action was all it took for the dam to break. And the tears began to flow.

Eyes red, nose running and red, heart cracking and resolve broken, she let it out, not caring that she was in a pizza shop. The two men seemed to have been expecting it, immediately helping her to her feet and leading her out of the pizza parlor. As they walked towards her apartment, she found herself calming down, much too mentally exhausted to question how they knew where she lived, she just walked up to the building, pulling her keys out of her bag as she walked. The journey to the 3rd floor, where her apartment was, was quiet and tense, no one saying anything. It was only when they were inside the cozy apartment that Sam spoke up, somewhat hesitantly, not wanting to upset the assassin.

"Well Y/N , how you doing?"

Silence.

"Nice apartment you got here"

Silence.

"You gonna give us the silent treatment?"

Silence.

Y/N looked at a spot on the wall. Her anxiety spot. She'd stare at the spot when she experienced a panic or anxiety attack and stare till she calmed down. She didn't reply to Sam's feeble attempts at conversation.

Bucky didn't say anything. He knew he wouldn't get a word out of Y/N unless she was ready to talk. He had known her long enough to know she had a wall up that didn't come down. His eyes wandered around the apartment, resting on the picture she had on the mantel. There was only 1. It was of her and Natasha. It was different, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐲.

"Nice picture you got there"

That got her attention.

"What do you want?" She finally mumbled, looking up to look the both of them in the eye.

"We need you're help, Y/N. To stop this John Walker and these Flag Smashers. You're smart and strong and pretty damn scary. Perfect for this job"

"Why should I?" She asked, flicking a spot of dust on the floor.

"Cause Natasha would have done it too, dragă" Bucky said.

For a moment a burst of pain shot through her heart. And then she nodded.

"I'll think about it. But you have to leave now. Come back tomorrow. I'll tell you then. Now, out."

Sam heaved an audible sigh of relief and hesitantly pulled her in for a hug. "Okay then. See ya,"

And he walked out the door

Bucky waited. Y/N waited.

Then he stood up. Moved over to her, hand moving up to gently caress her face, " you take care Miere"

"I will"

And he bent down, and pressed a kiss to her forehead, stood up and walked out, stopping to send her a smile. And she smiled back.

[straightasaaro]

See guys sexual assault content warnings are not that fucking hard

[purplesurveys]

1147

Have you ever overflown a bathtub? Hmm, I can’t remember ever doing that.

Why did you ignore the last person you ignored? My new manager, Kata, messaged me a bunch of links to EXO’s videos to get me into them – I looooove that she’s friendly and we vibe super well so I have a feeling will be close soon enough, but I’m still a bit shy so I ignored her for a bit while I was thinking of a reply haha. I’ve since gotten back to her, though.

What's your favorite pizza place? Yellow Cab’s pizzas have never failed me. Mama Lou’s is good too, but they don’t deliver to my area so I haven’t had their pizzas and any of their food in over a year now.

What was the last stupid thing someone talked you into believing? That we can stay friends. I believed it for a while and it was so mentally and emotionally deteriorating for me, so I did the right thing and let go instead.

What's at the top of your to do list in life? Save. I’m superrrrr frugal with my money and hate spoiling myself. I’d rather enjoy everything in the future once I feel like it’s right to settle down.

What's a song that would describe your life at the moment? What Type of X by Jessi. Maybe not my life, but the song certainly matches my mood these days.

Do you ever scream at inanimate objects? Occasionally, if they’re not working or if I accidentally hurt myself with them.

What was the last thing that you shared? I just had lunch delivered to Angela’s place as a surprise, if that counts. I got her chicken wings and these chocolate chip cookies she’s always wanted to try. It feels really nice surprising people with gifts; I might start making it a habit :) I have to credit my director Bea for it - she’s been having food delivered to mine and Kata’s places recently and I just want to pay it forward.

What smell/s can you absolutely not stand? Fruits. We constantly have a stock of oranges because my parents and sister like having them after dinner, and the smell is nauseating. Spoiled food is also high up on my list, and the general smell in Manila is also very foul. Go to other places in the Philippines if you’ll ever visit!!!

Do you ever eat leftover pizza cold? Yessssssssssssssss. Idk why but I find it really good? like even if I eat it straight out of the fridge.

Where are you the most ticklish? The sides of my stomach and around my neck.

Would you put your life in danger to rescue someone? Someone absolutely important to me, yes.

When you're wanting a midnight snack, what do you normally get? I usually don’t really like the snacks we have in our pantry so unless I already had food delivered earlier in the evening I just let the hunger fade because I don’t like having food delivered that late anyway.

Which cartoon character would you want to keep as a pet? Buster from Toy Story. Or Maximus from Tangled but in dog form, because I don’t know how to care for a horse.

What color best represents you? Something peaceful like off-white, or a pastel shade.

Do you like marshmallows? I hate them.

What is your favorite flavor of candy cane? I also don’t like candy canes, or candy in general. Too sweet and I can always feel how unhealthy they are whenever I have to have them.

Do you have any shoeboxes full of old photos/letters/other memorable stuff? My mom has several plastic bags filled with photographs over the last few decades. As for me, I don’t own any memory boxes; but recently, I’ve been sticking up notes from my friends and co-workers up on my corkboard.

Are you in any way double jointed? Nope.

Have you ever considered a career in music/acting? Never. I never liked singing in public and I’ve never considered acting.

When was the last time you felt seriously embarrassed? A few days ago when I accidentally turned my camera on during a work Zoom meeting while I looked completely unpresentable. Luckily I knew I clicked the button and immediately un-clicked it, but my video still showed up for like 0.001 seconds lol.

Have you ever liked a song, looked up the lyrics to it, then hated it? I don’t think I’ve gone so far as to hate it. I have felt slightly disturbed upon hearing the lyrics of some songs I’ve taken a liking to though; and Cherry Wine by Hozier certainly ticks off this box.

Which is worse for you: being hot, or being cold? Hot, which is why living where I do doesn’t work with me well for the most part.

What would be the icing on the cake for you this Christmas? Get nicer gifts for my loved ones. I was able to get everyone presents last Christmas, but given that I had just received my first-ever salary then, I wasn’t able to go all out as much as I would’ve liked. I’d love to spoil my loved ones even more for next Christmas.

If you had the opportunity to live forever, would you take it? Probably, as long as I was guaranteed to live comfortably. I’d love to see how else technology can continue to improve.

Have you made someone happy today? I hope so, when I got Angela food earlier.

Do you generally watch a lot of television? I do watch my favorite shows a lot, but not on television. Most of my content I already consume online.

If your bedroom walls could talk, what would they most likely say? They’d probably go over all the shit I had to go through and the ensuing breakdowns they’ve had to watch from me over the years.

What's your favorite Christmas song? It’s Beginning to Look A Lot Like Christmas, because it makes me feel festive.

Did you ever really believe in Santa Claus? Only for a brief moment when I was introduced to the concept, but kid-me never bought it because he never showed up.

Do you like the band Relient K? I’ve heard of the band name but I’m largely unfamiliar with them.

Have you ever seen a movie that was better than the book it was based on? Maybe, but for the most part I usually find the books to be better.

Do you like quesadillas? Yes, omg and with jalapeños and cheese *chef’s kiss*

Did you like the show Invader Zim? Nope.

Do you think tomorrow will be a good day? I feel like I’ll be sullen because it will be Sunday again, but I still plan on making the most out of it.

Do you ever talk to yourself? A lot.

Whose butt did you last slap? Idk, probably my ex.

Do you think that chivalry is dead? I don’t think so, but I also think it’s a bit outdated.

What's the greatest/most influential song you've ever heard? That’s a lot of pressure on a song... as much as I don’t really like The Beatles, I’d say Hey Jude has been pretty influential.

What's the weirdest thing you've seen in a grocery store? Not sure. If I had thought something I’ve seen was the weirdest thing ever, I would’ve taken a photo.

What is true love to you? Sacrifices.

Do you like chocolate milk? YES, lactose intolerance be damned.

Have you ever bought yourself a present on Christmas? Not yet. I hope to be able to this year!

Have you ever been on a mechanical bull? Nope, but I’d definitely get on one if I find one here.

Do you prefer to pull off band-aids slowly or quickly? Slowly. Actually, I prefer running water over it until it just slides off.

Have you made a mistake in the past week? I am constantly making tiny mistakes at work.

What was the last weird thing you said to someone? Idk, I feel like all the conversations I’ve had recently didn’t involve any inside jokes or general weirdness.

Have you ever met any bands/band members before? I got to work with one - Redd is the drummer for a local band but he’s since resigned to work with another company.

Have you ever sat on a copy machine and made copies of your butt? No. I’ve never even used a copy machine.

Are you a camera whore? Not at all, I hate posing for the camera.

Have you ever purposely dropped someone's toothbrush in a toilet? Never even considered it.

What kind of mood are you in right now? A little sad because it’s the weekend and I can’t even do my weekend coffee shop trips anymore because Covid cases are experiencing another surge (9000 cases a day!!!), protocols are everywhere again, and my parents already told me I can’t go out...those moments were my rare time alone where I can take walks and reflect and whatnot (and not to mention experieince air conditioning for a few hours), so it sucks to have to be stuck at home again. There’s not much to do at home to begin with, so now I’m just stuck in a cycle of taking surveys and finding videos to watch on YouTube.

What was the last thing someone told you that had you at a loss for words? I was ranting to Andi about how I started despising Diane from BoJack Horseman the moment she flipped out over Mr. Peanutbutter gifting her an entire library. I get where she’s coming from, of course, “understand people’s love language” and all that; but I felt like the very hostile reaction was super uncalled for and it reminded me a lot of my relationship with Gabie – I liked giving and giving, but it was either 1) never enough or 2) apparently the wrong way to show her love, and I was always the one punished for it in the end. I told Andi that because of my experience with her, I don’t even feel like giving a library (metaphorically speaking) to any future significant others anymore because of how hard I had it with her. 

Anyway, they gave me some advice about it and in the end they told me, “One day, someone will tell you, “Thank you for your library.’” It was very beautifully put and I struggled to find the words to reply.

What's something that always makes you smile, regardless of what’s going on? I’m not sure there is such a no-fail thing.

What was that last thing that you bought online? Food for Angela.

Do you enjoy riding around town looking at Christmas lights? Yeah, but the general mood for last year obviously wasn’t super festive and there weren’t as much lights, so it’s been a while since I’ve seen my village all decked out.

Is there someone that you're mean to for no good reason? No, that’s terrible.

What was the last thing you got out of the freezer? The coffee ice cream that I bought from Leigh yesterday! It’s crazy fucking good and I already feel a repeat order coming through.

Are you currently reading anything? No.

What's a good book you'd recommend? I don’t read anymore. I know child/teen-me would be very disappointed.

[phantoms-lair]

MSA Secret Santa

@accidental-child

Arthur sighed, leaning against the steering wheel of the van. The bus was a little late, but that wasn’t unexpected. Not out here at any rate.

There was a small selfish part of himself that wished he hadn’t picked up the phone that day. It was selfish - and ridiculous. The call had been at the garage, he needed to answer those calls!

It had been some great Aunt, or far removed cousin. He wasn’t quite sure how they were related. Apparently her son was originally going to spend summer break with one of his friends, but their trip had been cut short. The problem was said parents and their daughter had already made other arrangements and wanted to know if the aforementioned son could stay with Lance.

The problem was, Lance wasn’t there and wouldn’t be for a while. He was off on a road trip with some of his old buddies from his days when he absolutely positively was not a wrestler. It was a well overdue vacation and Arthur wasn’t going to call him back from it.

But something stopped him from just turning her down. It wasn’t her, but… it was the idea that their current plans ‘couldn’t be altered’. Lance had planned his trip to originally be last year, but he’d dropped everything after Arthur had turned up in a hospital without an arm. Also that they were reaching out to family that wasn’t that close at all made Arthur wonder if the closer relatives had also had plans that couldn’t be altered. It stank too much of no one wanting this kid, and damned if he was going to add to that

So here he was, waiting for a cousin he’d never met who’d be spending a month with him. He didn’t think it would matter so much if he wasn’t the age he was - 18. Younger would have been easier to slip into a child-guardian relationship and older meant this wouldn’t have been an issue in the first place. But 18 was an age of feeling you were coming into your own authority, and much more likely to take onus with someone a mere five years older than you being in charge.

The bus pulled up and Arthur braced himself. Two figures got off the bus, his cousin and...a dog? A rather large dog at that. Something else Aunt Wendy had forgot to mention. Hopefully it was good with other dogs and hamsters.

Pushing his misgivings aside, Arthur left the van with a big welcoming smile. No need to borrow trouble till it was here. “Hi, you must be Norville, right?”

The teen winced. “Like, call me Shaggy please. I hate Norville.” 

“Done and done.” Arthur agreed readily. “The name Norville is thus dead and shall never be spoken from mine lips again.”

“Ri’m Scooby Doo.”

Another talking dog, huh. “Just to make certain, you’re not actually an ancient kitsune with an evil Japanese tree after you?”

“Like, not that we know of?” Shaggy looked confused. So did Scooby so Arthur let it slide. 

“Okay, let’s get some food, and we can figure out stuff out.” Apparently he said the right word, because his cousin and dog perked up a lot. “Let me help you with your bags.” “Is your arm metal?” Shaggy asked, surprised.

“Sure is, made it myself.” Arthur wiggled his fingers at him, inwardly bracing himself. “That’s cool.” Shaggy said earnestly, picking up his other suitcase.

No ‘How did that happen?’ or ‘That must be so terrible’? Okay, thus far Arthur was counting this as a win.

~

“So,” Arthur started as they slid into a booth at Pepper Paradiso, “Let’s go over your options.”

“Options?” Shaggy asked, surprised.

“Yeah, you have two main options, and we can tweak them as need be. The first is what I told your Mom. You come to stay with me and my boyfriend and girlfriend. We’ve set up a spare room for you, and Scooby I guess, sorry no one told us he was coming.” “If you’d prefer not to deal with three people being kinda mushy, or just want more privacy  I’d give you a key to Lance’s place. You could stay in my old room and basically have the house to yourself. I’d still be checking in everyday and making sure you had food and stuff, but other than that, you’d be on your own.” 

Shaggy seemed to think a moment. “You have a boyfriend and a girlfriend? You can do that?” “Yes.” Arthur answered simply.

“Okay, like if it’s all the same, man, I’d rather stay with you. I don’t think me or Scoob want to be alone.”

Arthur tried not to take it as a warning sign. True, most teens would jump at the first chance to be on their own, but that was hardly universal. There was a small feeling that something was wrong, not just parental negligence. What, he didn’t know. And truthfully it could be nothing. Arthur had a tendency to jump to worst case scenarios (catastrophizing, his therapist had called it), so for now he’d wait and see.

“So is this the mysterious cousin?” Mrs Chef Pepper came over, winking .

“Yeah, this is Shaggy. Shaggy, this is one half of the best cooking team in Tempo, and honestly Texas.”

“Flatterer. My name’s Carmella Pepper. My husband’s running the kitchen, so I have the front end today. I assume the usual, Arthur?” “With no Cayenne additions, please.”

“She’s banned from the kitchen after the last hot sauce-strawberry shake.” Carmella assured him. “What about you, Shaggy?”

Shaggy looked at the menu. “Like, could Scoob and I each get a ‘Vivi Special’ “ he pointed to the menu.

She raised an eyebrow. With the exception of its namesake, the Vivi Special was usually ordered to be shared by a family. She’d never seen an order of two of them. “Do you want the plate of spicy chorizo or pancake poppers?” Scooby and Shaggy looked at each other. “One of each please. And, like separate checks? Mom set up an account for me for food and stuff.” Arthur tried to hide his relief. One extra mouth he could feed. Two more Vivi appetites would have strained his budget beyond feasibility.

~ “Lewis, Vivi— we’re home!” Arthur called, letting himself and his two guests in.

“Welcome home, Arty.” Lewis greeted, pulling his boyfriend in for a kiss. “So this must be Nor-”

“The name is not to be spoken. It has been cast into the abyss and replaced with Shaggy.” Arthur said with a completely straight face. “It has become one with the void.” Lewis rolled his eyes. “Sorry for the melodramatic one, I’m Lewis. Lewis Pepper.”

Shaggy shook his hand while Arthur sputtered over Lewis calling him melodramatic. “Pepper, like the people who run the restaurant?” “My parents.” Lewis explained.

“Wow, like they’re great cooks, man. It’s the first place me and Scooby found that we could be full off one thing on the menu.” “If you can call the ‘Vivi Special’ one thing.” Arthur quipped.

“Someone call me?” Vivi slid into the front room, literally, her socks holding no traction on the hardwood floor, causing her to crash into Lewis. “Arthur’s cousin Shaggy is a fan of your addition to my parents menu.” Lewis said.

“Ooooo Did you get the version with the spicy chorizo or pancake poppers?”

“Like, Scoob and I got one of each. I really liked Aztec Chocolate sauce on the sweet chili!”

“I know! And the smoked gouda filled jalapeño poppers!” 

“Arthur, I think our girlfriend just adopted your cousin.” Lewis commented.

~

Vivi stretched as she got home from her morning shift at the Tome Tomb. Arthur was having a full day at Kingsmen’s, so she figured she’d check in on Shaggy and Scooby before getting in some serious cuddle time with Lewis.

She found them in the living room, Shaggy was looking at a book. Not reading it, but staring at the cover, while Scooby leaned against him comfortingly. “Everything okay boys?” She asked softly.

Shaggy took a moment to answer. “Do you believe in this stuff? Magic and monsters?” “As a matter of fact I do.” She tried to keep the humor out of her voice. Shaggy had no idea he was spending the remainder of his summer with a ghost and a kitsune. “Do you?”

Shaggy didn’t answer. “Doesn’t it scare you?” he asked.

“The supernatural? Not really. Or at least, not more than anything else.” She sat down next to him. “There’s good and bad magic, just like there’s good and bad technology. Some beings are friendly, some just want to be left alone, and some are truly evil, just like people. You always, always, have to be careful. But I’d rather know, you know?” Shaggy shook his head. “Like, I think I’d rather not.” He looked at the book again. “Like, have you ever heard of something called the Chest of Demons?”

“Not off the top of my head, why?”

Shaggy shook his head. “Nothing, like what’s for lunch?” Vivi accepted the topic change, but didn’t forget what she’d heard. This merited some digging into.

~

Arthur felt dead on his feet (though not quite as much as Lewis, ha!) as he got home that evening.  Working in the garage was one thing, but running it was quite another. He couldn’t wait for Lance to get back.

It was Vivi who greeted him at the door, wrapping her arms around him and squeezing him. Arthur melted into the embrace, the warmth he felt in his heart giving him back the strength spent on budget balancing and unruly customers.

But as he felt himself relax, he realized she wasn’t easing up. Something was wrong. “What is it, Vi?”

“Your cousin.” She answered, her head still buried in the crook of Arthur’s neck. “He was looking at my books and mentioned something called the Chest of Demons. I hadn’t heard of it, so I sent out some feelers.”

“Bad?” Arthur guessed, as if the name didn’t give that away.

“Not just the chest itself. I still don’t know what it is, because one of the few things I did manage to learn is it’s protected by near total secrecy. It’s not something he could have just randomly heard of.”

Arthur’s mouth set into a grim frown. He could think of a few reasons, but none of them were good.

“And this isn’t some random client messing with something he shouldn’t, he’s your cousin and I like him, but this is serious.”

“I’ll talk to him.” Arthur promised. 

“No!” Vivi squeezed him tighter. “I don’t want to think he’s up to anything bad, but-” Honestly with how Shaggy had reacted to ‘Magic and Monsters’ she doubted it, but she couldn’t be sure and she wasn’t willing to put any of her boys in the path of danger.

Arthur laid a gentle kiss on her forehead. “You can have one of the Beats watching over us if it makes you feel better, but we can’t leave this alone and he’s nervous enough I don’t want him to feel like we’re ganging up on him.”

“That still puts you at risk,” Vivi argued.

“There’s always a risk, love. And you can’t take all of them for me. And I think this is a small one. Have you talked to Lewis yet?”

“Talked to be about what?” Lewis popped his head in. “You guys were taking a while. Is everything okay?”

“Shaggy may or may not have gotten mixed up in something supernatural and I want to talk to him about it. I want to do it alone so I don’t overwhelm him, but Vivi doesn’t want me to go talk about an evil artifact with the person who brought it up by myself. I volunteered to take a Beat with me.” “Take Mystery too.” Lewis suggested. “Shaggy likes him, so he wouldn’t feel ganged up on.”

Vivi let out a sigh of relief. “I love your Deadbeats, Lew, but I feel a lot better about that plan.”

~

“Hey Shaggy,” Arthur sat down. Mystery curled up by his feet, looking innocuous, but keeping a careful eye on Shaggy and Scooby.

“Hey,” Shaggy didn’t look up from the video game he was playing. “Like, how was work?”

“Not too bad. Can we talk about something?”

“Sure, man.” Shaggy paused the game. “What’s up?”

So many questions ran through Arthur’s head. Why do you know about the Chest of Demon? How did you find out about it? How much do you know? But there was one question he felt the need to ask above all the others.

“Are you in any danger?”

Shaggy blinked, caught completely off guard. “Huh?”

“You brought up something called the Chest of Demons to Vivi today. She did some digging. It was bad.” Arthur kept it vague to hide how much he didn’t know. “It’s also not a name you’d just stumble on. So, are you in any danger?” Shaggy deflated. “Like, not right now. Probably later. Thirteen seems to be keeping a low profile, but given the other twelve? At least Boggle and Weird are sealed up.”

Okay, Arthur didn’t understand any of that after ‘Probably later’. “Can you start at the beginning?”

“Okay, so like originally the five us were supposed to spend the summer on a global road trip, but Fred and Velma ended up going to camp, so like it was just me, Scooby, and Daphne. And we kinda sorta got lost. We ended up in the place where the chest was hidden. There were these two ghosts, Boggle and Weird. They wanted the thirteen evil spirits in the chest free, but it can only be opened by the living. So they tricked me and Scoob into opening it.and setting their masters free.”

Shaggy then rolled his eyes. “And of course only the ones who open the chest can return them, so like, suddenly we’re chasing down the nastiest ghoulies this side of the River Styx. We got the first twelve and got Boggle and Weird sucked in for good measure but with no sign of number thirteen Vincent cut us loose till he finds him.”

“Vincent?” Arthur inquired.

“A mystic who knows a lot about the Chest of Demon and it’s prisoners. He’s been helping us.” Shaggy shrugged. “Daphne suggested continuing our vacation while we’re on break, but I just kinda wanted to go home.” “Did you tell your family any of this?” Arthur wondered.

His cousin snorted. “Besides you? Like no one would believe me! And Daphne….” Shaggy trailed off.

“And Daphne?” Arthur prompted.

“It sounds weird to say, but this seemed to be, like, good for her? Before she kinda followed whatever Fred said. This summer though, she was taking charge and becoming more confident in herself. And like, I’m happy for her, but it means-” Shaggy seemed to struggle for his words, Scooby putting a reassuring head on his knee. “I’m a coward. I’d rather run from scary things than fight them. And I know I have to get them back in the box, cause it’s my fault they’re out-”

“Rour fault,” Scooby corrected.

“-but I’m scared all the time and I don’t want to be and no one but Scoob seems to get that.”

“Of course you’re scared,” Arthur scoffed. “You’ve had thirteen evil spirits after you. That’s objectively terrifying. You’d be crazy not to be scared.”

Boy and dog seemed taken aback.

While he couldn’t say he had been expecting those details, at least this lined up with what Arthur suspected, that Shaggy had stumbled into trouble, not sought it out.

“Okay, so first things first, what do you know about Spirit #13? What kind of spirit is it?” Arthur’s voice was all business.

“Not yet, Vincent usually tells us about them as he finds them.” Shaggy explained.

“If you can contact him, see if you can find out what we’re dealing with. It’ll be more effective if we can narrow that down.”

“What will be?” Shaggy asked, confused.

“Protective wards. That reminds me. Lewis, Vivi, Shaggy has a potential evil spirit after him. Brainstorming time.” “Huh?”

Lewis and Vivi showed up a bit too quickly to not have been listening in, but Arthur hoped Shaggy wouldn’t notice.

“There’s already some basic wards against hostile entities on the house, Pepper Paradiso, Lance’s, Kingsmen’s, and the Tome Tomb.” Vivi listed.

“I’ve got a few things around town warning me of anything of any level of power entering.” Mystery put forth. “It’s only weak spot is the lake.”

“Which has a protector of its own.” Arthur had a wry grin. “Nothing coming in from that side.”

Shaggy and Scooby shared a confused look. “You guys had this already set up?”

“You get surprised by a Jubokko once, you take precautions.” Vivi said dryly. “But this is all general stuff. The more specifics we know, the better defenses we can make. We can also figure out what places near your home we need to ward, or come up with something portable.”

Shaggy just looked between the four of them, confused. “Why?”

Lewis took a deep breath ( or at least mimed doing so). “Shaggy, you’re Arthur’s cousin, do you know what that means?”

Shaggy shook his head.

“It means you’re family,  you’re our family. And we protect family however we can.” Lewis stated. “And we know monsters exist. We’ll be ready.”

Shaggy seemed at a loss for words. His mouth opened and closed a few times. “Thank you,” he finally whispered, his voice raw with emotion.

Arthur pulled him into a hug. “That’s what family does.”

[lovebishoplosamiguelgalindos]

Needs Attention Part Two : Angel Reyes and reader

Some time later at the house you and Angel shared. You had walked into the house together. “ All right let’s get you showered and comfy.” Angel smirked “ Comfy?” You played with his beard a little more. “ Yes , into your favorite sweats and tank top.” He nodded . “ Okay querida.” Then you headed to he bedroom and found what he liked to wear at home after a long day. He pulled off his kutte and hung it up on the wall hook and then placed his jeans and flannel into the laundry hamper. “ All right since you’re ready to shower , I’ll get something to help your head .” His face softened. “ I’m so damn lucky to have you in my life.” His hand ran over your face gently. You smiled and reached into your nightstand where you kept some bath things and found what you needed .. A shower bomb for colds. It would be perfect for right now. You heard him turn the water on in his shower and adjust the temperature to where he liked it. You slid the shower bomb in behind him and then left the bathroom so he could start to feel better. You knew some good old fashioned chicken soup would make him feel better but kicked up with a little jalapeño in it , So you headed to the kitchen and found the ingredients for it .

Forty five minutes later: Angel came to the kitchen looking tired and runny nosed. He sniffed once before he sat in his chair at the table. “ What did you put in the shower ?” “ Somethig smelled different but made my head open up.”

“ That was a eucalyptus shower bomb for colds. It’s supposed to help you breathe easier when you feel congested.” He nodded.

“ And I made some chicken soup so why don’t I get us some mugs.”

“ You take such good care of me mami. If I didn’t feel like hell I would show you how much I appreciate it.”

“Well I will take a rain check on that Mr. Reyes . You take care of me all the time.” You kissed his forehead. No fever which was good. Then you got the soup and sat down to eat together. His hand touched yours on the table. “ Who would think a woman would put up with my ass for four months ?”

“ You needed the right one , besides some men didn’t like the shifts I work or my size so we’re even Angelito.”

“ Those must have been boys . A man appreciates having something to hold on to that fits nicely on his lap. Don’t ever forget that me reina.”

Your face reddened slightly. “ You are so sweet.”

“ It’s true, I want a real lady beside me and not a celery stick . I want something to hold in my arms in bed . And plus you look amazing in jeans .” You were awestruck listening to him. Sometimes when you went to the clubhouse Vicki’s girls were being all flirty and they tried it with Angel but he would always focus on you. He said “ The lady at the bar who is wearing my ring is all the woman I ever need.”

You both ate your soup and cleaned up the dishes and then Angel yawned. “Someone is tired , let me get some cold medicine for your head and we’ll go crawl in bed okay papi?”

He exhaled. “ Sure .” Then you headed to bed arm in arm.

Angel fixed the blankets for you both to crawl into like he did when he got home early. You slept in one of his old t shirts and just your panties most nights. Pajamas when the weather got crisper after early fall. You kissed his cheek and then curled up to him where he liked you. His fingers ran though the ends of your black hair with a streak of purple on the left side of your face. “ You always change your hair when you see your sister.”

“ She doesn’t want me to be bored with it.” Then the bedroom light clicked off and you both relaxed to curl in each other’s arms and sleep.

More to come I am having fun writing them.