#damn it alduin

[puzzled-pegasus]

Gormlaith in that one cutscene: Alduin approaches!

Alduin:

[acrowwithakeyboard]

Drea is a Nord woman of simple principles: Be nice to others, ask questions if you don't understand, and don't start fights, just make sure you end them.

[strigital]

so a new yearly adventure 'bout to drop and half of the players are already simping for ithelia while another half is grieving her boring design. me? i'm more interested in the fact that zenimax gave us a lore-friendly way to make our own dardric prince ocs and uuuh lemme just grab a sketchbook real quick and cook up an opposite to mepahala and probably/possibly her twin whose sphere are energies of the afterlife, death and being the shepherd of the undead and the restless dead 👀 and maybe a babygirl of a dardric prince who is the opposite of hircine and oversees the wild beauty of natural world, shapeshifers, sentient trees and talking animals, and mysteries of wild magic and secrets of the untouched wilderness, who has the bottom half of a deer whereas hircine has a head of an elk🦌 ooh! maybe even some opposite to namira whose domain is beauty, poetry and all that is aesthetically pleasing and dreamy and nice who may look like one of those fairies with butterfly wings all over them 🧚‍♀️

anyways, feck the lore, i'm here to 100% milk herma mora's ability to just "conveniently hide" entire dardric princes outside of reality thus making any and all stupid little dardric blorbo ocs we make "technically lore-friendly"

[saddragn]

Whats your opinion on Paarthurnax from skyrim

I wish he had more dialogue so I could listen to that killer voice more

There should be some kind of dragon-centric ending where you de-power Alduin and pawn him off to Paarthurnax or something. Idk man I just want more dragon content

Imagined him at the start of his exile in some dumbass pose going “Damn,..,, I can’t believe I participated in the domination of the world,…. I fucked up :/“ like the world’s most evil himbo and I had to follow through

[mrhrns]

Had this idea for damn too long and finally decided to start it materializing. The idea? Making semi-humanizations of Elder Scrolls dragons. Why? Because. The First-Born of Akatosh, the King of dragons - Alduin. Very grumpy, very angy. I think I will remake him later just like with sketching all the other known dragons, but yeah. Next one will be Paarthurnax!

[ego-osbourne]

I wanted to expand on my last post. Eventually I’ll do one about Glarthir, but I feel like he’s an easier case to understand. For now, I want to talk about why

Mankar Camoran was right.

To preface: I think an extremely important part about understanding this position is reading Oblivion’s writing from a Doylist perspective, not a Watsonian one. Oblivion as a game provides a very biased narrative for the player, feeling almost as if the Empire itself made a game about the events of the Oblivion Crisis, erasing most things that make the Empire look wholly evil while offering just enough grey area to keep it from looking squeaky clean, and thus keeping most suspicions of true intent away. So much of TES’s lore and story is supplemented through propaganda that fans have to sift through and interpret. Here’s my interpretation.

On surface level, Mankar Camoran is a very forgettable villain. Beyond surface level, though… he’s still rather forgettable. In-game, we only see him two times throughout the whole main quest, once to establish that he even exists, and twice to kill him. He’s very mortal, and most players will see him as nothing more than a blabbering old man with very little credibility or motivation beyond “mwahaha I’m evil.” In Paradise, his speech to the player strays a bit far from the Dagonite sermon we hear in the Lake Arrius Caverns, dropping proper nouns that were never pre-established before then. Reading his Commentaries won’t help with understanding, either, as it’s filled will inane jargon that can hardly stay on topic between paragraphs, let alone between books, speaking of “heaven” and “angels” and spelling Nirn like NRN as if it was ripped straight from ancient Hebrew Christian scriptures. It’s all very esoteric, but in the way that it feels like you’re talking to someone with only a baseline understanding of occultism, and it completely rips you from your immersion in the game. Even without the Commentaries or the out-of-place mentions of Lorkhan and the motivations that come with that, Mankar stupid enough to even get the names of the Daedric Prince’s realms wrong! What is happening?

MK. MK is what is happening.

To be fair, this is not all Michael Kirkbride’s fault—in fact, I’d argue that MK had little-to-nothing to do with the finalizing of Mankar’s character and motivations; however, he was clearly involved. The Commentaries are rife with his writing style, and we have posts by MK confirming his involvement with writing Mankar. I’d more accurately (but less punchily) say that what is actually happening is developer meddling and a lack of proofreading.

DEVELOPER MEDDLING

Developer meddling can be intentional (in-world propaganda) or unintentional (narrative-pushing biases). These oftentimes overlap, and the case is especially apparent in Mankar.

Fantasy has always had an oddly charged stance against elves, and TES is no exception. Aside from Daggerfall, no mainline TES game has had a mq villain be something other than a Daedra or an elf. Daedra are self-explanatory candidates for villains, being TES’s stand-in for demons, and (whether lore accurate or not) are seen as inherently evil. However, elves are a whole different story. They are simply another people group within the realm of Nirn, and yet if a villain needs to be presented, that villain is more often than not going to be an elf. It wasn’t until Skyrim that we saw non-elven and non-Daedric villains; though, none are quite human either. Alduin is a dragon, obviously; Harkon is a Nord, but he’s also a vampire, and his vampiric nature supersedes his human nature; Miraak is an… Atmoran? a Nord? but, again, only hardly such, posing more like a Daedric-dragon-manthing than something solely human. In Oblivion, there is only one primary human enemy—Mathieu Bellamont of the DBH quest line, but even he is only just human. He’s a Breton, a human-elf mix, a “manmer” (yes, Bretons do count as mannish races, but I still find it to be a slightly damning detail). Every other villain is an elf (Mankar, Mannimarco, Umaril*) or a Daedra (Dagon, Jyggalag).

*Umarill is described to be a “half-elf;” his mother is an Ayleid, but his father is “divine” (see, 1).

Already we see a strange lean towards non-humans—especially elves—being villains. This is contrasted with humans largely being seen as the good guys. Uriel, Martin, Baurus, they’re all humans against the elven villain, Mankar. Pelinal Whitestrake isn’t classified as a specific human race, but is certainly human enough to be named Shezarrine, the “God of Man,” and notably genocides an entire race of elves… and this is celebrated in game. The player is meant to emulate Pelinal during the Knights of the Nine DLC, and his genocide is supported by the Divines and generally seen as a good thing.

Meanwhile, any anti-human sentiments are treated much more seriously in lore, framed either as a severe threat or pure evil. For example, Tiber Septim’s complete takeover of Tamriel is a good thing, despite his multiple war crimes against elves and his general hatred for them, but the Thalmor’s shadow over Tamriel is a world-ending threat that paints all elves (or at least all Altmer) as villains conspiring against humans. As another example, looking back at Oblivion, the Ayleid’s enslavement of humans is purely evil, but Pelinal’s complete and successful genocide of the entire Ayleid race is something to be celebrated. There is an obvious double-standard regarding elves and men in TES, and even when there are exceptions to this rule, the majority of the series is woven with this prejudice.

We can see this very clearly with the Camorans, particularly with Haymon (the Camoran Usurper) and Mankar. I read most “historical” documentation of Haymon and Mankar to be Imperial propaganda, though I am surprised by the fandom tendency to read these documents as the full-faced truth, especially when considering these documents’ biases. I’ll break down a few examples.

Haymon Camoran rose to the Valenwood throne during a time of great strife within the country, particularly in regard to Imperial control (see, History: Third Era, ¶1). He sought to free Valenwood of Imperial rule, and did so through means of war. In any other scenario, this would read as a story of heroism, where one person is able to assemble enough hope to stand against the shadow of an oppressive empire and free their country. However, TES offers us no such narrative, only giving us retellings of this history through Imperial lenses (Pocket Guide to the Empire, 3rd Edition; The Refugees; The Fall of the Usurper; etc.). In these retellings, Haymon is demonized as a cruel warmonger, with the only one to stand up against him being Kaltos Camoran, who held the throne before Haymon (see, Invasion of Tamriel, ¶1). Kaltos’s positive image in these accounts hints that he was an Empire sympathizer, and this is magnified by the fact that Valenwood was in a state of unrest due to Imperial rule while Kaltos was on the throne. Kaltos was likely allowing Imperial forces to remain within Valenwood, and we can speculate as to why (greed, status, etc.). No wonder these Imperial retellings categorize him in a good light, he was on their side and effectively a traitor to his own country. If we had Valenwood retellings of this history, I would wager that they’d regard Kaltos in a negative light and Haymon in a positive light, for the most part.

Additionally, Haymon is further demonized, reported to have led an army of undead and Daedra (see, Invasion of Tamriel, ¶1). This is a blatantly odd and impractical choice for an army, especially when other evidence points to Haymon having great enough of an influence in Valenwood to not be assassinated or stopped when he took the throne from Kaltos; thus, he would surely have enough influence to lead an army of Bosmer. To me, this reads like Imperial reports meddling with history, choosing to paint Haymon as a lich-like villain who can only convince the undead and Daedra to follow his reign rather than allow their readers to believe that actual flesh-and-blood intelligent people would follow Haymon. This is a common tactic of propaganda: dehumanizing the opposition’s support so that it seems foolish for anyone in the present time to support the opposition as well. Furthermore, rumors of Haymon being the son of Molag Bal are apparently rampant throughout the Empire, which is so amusingly outlandish that it reads like the real-world counterpart of someone calling a political leader the Antichrist in protest (see, Notes, *1).

As for Mankar, propaganda exists for him, too, most notably in the book The Refugees. This book is rather deceiving, however. My first read of it had me fully believing it at face-value because it presents itself as a mere documentation of true events. The Refugees details Haymon’s last attack in Dwynnen, High Rock, and focuses on a small group of survivors: some civilians, some detractors from Haymon’s cause. The book leads the reader to believe that the main characters are these various refugees, with the plot being a simple sharing of conversations about the goings-on of the attack. But, it sneaks in little things that we would see in pro-Imperial accounts of the event, like Kaltos being framed as the Good Guy while Haymon is a cruel warmonger, again (see, ¶34). Additionally, it “so happens” to serve as an origin story for Mankar, who in the book is reported to have been born among the refugees. This birth is far from ordinary, though.

Mankar’s mother, Kaalys, is reported to be the runaway mistress of Haymon, hiding with the refugees in Dwynnen after abandoning Haymon’s cause. The refugees believe she is sick and going mad from stress, as she keeps yelling, “Mankar is coming!” repeatedly. By the end of the book, though, we learn that she was not simply sick, but was going through labor, and this “Mankar” is the very child she birthed. She reports that Mankar “will bring death. He will destroy all,” (see, ¶62). She then runs off immediately after labor with Mankar in tow.

There’s a lot to criticize here. What seems like a strange, crazed mother prophesying the incoming Crisis that Mankar will bring actually reads very much like propaganda against Mankar, written in his later years of life, possibly in response to his growing popularity to “prove” that he was born of malicious origins that even his own mother could sense. This is all hidden under the veil of The Refugees being a simple retelling of events, shifting the focus away from Kaalys and Mankar just enough to make readers unsuspicious of its propagandist intentions. Attempting to read into the details brings up a lot of issues.

First: If Kaalys was in labor during the sacking of Dwynnen, that means she had to have been very pregnant for a couple months up until that point. How in the world was she traveling with Haymon across the continent (from Valenwood to High Rock) while being that pregnant? It seems like an oversight by an author who simply wanted to tell a specific narrative of Haymon’s allies turning against him. Second: How did the refugees mistake her for being sick instead of recognizing that she was pregnant and in labor? Those seem like two very different things, with the latter being very obvious and recognizable. It seems like another oversight by an author who was not too worried about the details of their story, and who only wished to tell a specific narrative about Mankar’s origins. Third: How was she able to up and run away with Mankar immediately after giving birth? And while injured (see, ¶55)? Even if technically possible, that is highly improbable, if not next to impossible. It seems like a cheap tactic to work her out of the picture rather than follow her journey after the fact, as if the author only meant to tell one specific narrative. Are we seeing a pattern?

Oh, and fourth: Who talks about their child like that? It’s almost like the author wanted to paint a specific narrative about Mankar being born evil. The Refugees stands as one big anti-Haymon, pro-Empire propaganda piece written under the guise of sympathetic characters and calling any remaining supporters of Haymon foolish, because look! All of Haymon’s closest followers abandoned him (note that this is the only report we have of any of Haymon’s followers abandoning him)! And also, look! His son is evil! Even his mother knew it! And before he was born, no less! (/speech in-character)

My theory is that this book was written in response to Mankar’s growing influence within the Empire. He was charismatic enough to win the minds and hearts of many of the Empire’s citizens, and The Refugees sought to prevent further damage as much as it could by pretending to be a simple report from the Dwynnen sacking that just so happened to have Mankar’s evil origins scribed within it. Tsk tsk tsk.

A LACK OF PROOFREADING

So, that was all Mankar’s background, but what about the man himself? He’s obviously a raving idiot who can’t keep his thoughts straight to save his life. He seems to not be well-grounded in Daedric affairs at all, showing a mix of Dagonite worship, Lorkhan sympathy, and Ayleid appreciation all while attributing the wrong Prince to the wrong realm. This is where MK comes in.

By 2006, it seems MK was no longer directly involved with Bethesda Game Studios after his work on Morrowind. However, he still had a lot of contact with the employees and developers over at BGS, and would answer them in emails about any questions they had, especially regarding inspiration for writing Oblivion. It seems the devs, in attempting to get a feel for Mankar’s character, asked MK to write a speech by Mankar. MK writes something up, seemingly semi-flippantly according to his desire to want to “*really* [go] nuts with it” after learning “Terrance Freakin Stamp” would be voicing Mankar (see, 2006, ¶14).

Unbeknownst to MK, his emails would be used word-for-word as in-game dialogue (Mankar’s speech) and books (the Commentaries). Quoted from MK, “That whole speech came from a section of said email where I attempted to get inside [Mankar’s] head so I could understand how he might think, and how that thought would translate to his writing. Turns out, [Mankar] writes like me. Ah, well,” (see, 2006, ¶12–13).

These emails were not altered when translated to game according to MK (“Turns out, Mankar writes like me.”). Additionally, these emails were not fact-checked, either. The speeches and books seem to be a complete rip, a copy-and-paste from MK’s email, with flaws and all, including the mistake of attributing the wrong Prince to the wrong realm that everyone likes to clown on Mankar for. Mankar was never intended to be written as a raving idiot, his dialogue was simply never fact-checked against TES’s own lore, and his character suffered the consequences.

On the topic of MK’s involvement with writing Mankar, it explains why Mankar’s motivations seem to flip from pure Dagonism to Lorkhan sympathy. MK is writing to BGS with a Morrowind brain, where Lorkhan and his lore plays a major part in the plot of TESIII. But, in TESIV, Lorkhan is never mentioned outside of Mankar’s own speech/writings. If the devs of Oblivion had taken more careful consideration of Mankar’s character instead of ripping straight from MK’s emails, I believe they could have narrowed down Mankar’s motivations and made him a much better villain. I would argue that Lorkhan’s story does not need to be told in Oblivion’s plot, and the plot would have benefited a great deal from focusing on, oh, I don’t know, the Prince actually behind it all, Mehrunes Dagon! Dagon, too, is clowned on for being a thoughtless, stupid, barbaric tank who only knows destruction. It’s no wonder that the fandom often forgets he is also the Prince of Hope, because the devs forget that detail themselves!

MK and Todd Howard both even say that Mankar was right to some degree—or, at least, he was meant to be! MK says, “Canon or not, my two cents is that [Mankar] is completely right … but don’t quote me…I didn’t write this in-character,” (sorry MK, gotta quote!) (see, 2006, ¶15). Todd Howard even claims that he wanted Mankar to be a morally grey villain! Quote: “You know, he’s not a cackling maniac. We like to have our bad guys be a little grayer. We want that moment where the player goes like… Maybe he’s right,” (see, Notes, *5).

Crazy! Todd Howard wanted Mankar to be seen as grey, as competent, as right! And yet, because of a total lack of care for fact-checking, a disregard for the necessities of cutting away excess plot, and a general apathy for Mankar, the Mythic Dawn, and Dagon as driving forces in the story, Oblivion’s main plot suffers for it. Todd Howard’s intentions to make Mankar a grey villain flopped so severely that it requires many leaps and bounds to see Mankar the way Todd might have wanted him to be.

LEAPS AND BOUNDS

However, I would argue there is hope for Mankar’s character as it stands. The execution was horrible, but the pieces of a grey villain do still exist! Many of my ideas were first sparked by this video, so I would recommend giving it a watch if you’re able!

For this formula to work, we have to look at Mankar from a very objective perspective. We must consider that most/all of the information given on Mankar in-game is propaganda. Even in-game events that the player sees with their own eyes must be understood as manufactured to create a caricature of a villain rather than a true villain with understandable motivations. Essentially, we must have a very critical eye about everything.

Mankar Camoran was born to Haymon Camoran and Kaalys Camoran. In Valenwood, Haymon was regarded as a felled hero, his life ended too soon to completely free and secure Valenwood from Imperial rule, allowing it to be overtaken by Summerset and Elsywer after his death (see, History: Third Era, ¶2). Valenwood is then overrun by sympathizers of various political entities, leaving the to-be prince Mankar unsafe in his own country. Perhaps he and his mother flee to Cyrodiil and hide under different aliases for a while, or perhaps Kaalys swears loyalty to the Empire in exchange for protection from the overpowering forces back in Valenwood. However it happens, Mankar eventually ends up in Cyrodiil, and he has complaints about the religious-political system.

The Empire, reportedly inspired by the real-world Roman Empire, fittingly reflects the Roman Empire’s facade of order and peace while perpetuating unrest beneath the surface. Racial tensions against elves persist from age to age, with the Empire constantly undercutting their elven enemies and making them the face of the opposition, from Alessia to Tiber Septim. This anti-elf sentiment is perpetuated by the Divines themselves, who hypocritically promote peace and unity while celebrating figures such as Pelinal Whitestrake and allowing the likes of Tiber Septim into their ranks. Homelessness and poverty are also rampant in the Empire despite the Imperial Cult’s vast wealth. Again, the Divines are hypocritical, offering words of peace and prosperity through their priests, but they ultimately do nothing to help with the economic crisis.

Mankar sees this and is rightfully appalled. How can both the Empire and the Divines do nothing about all of this suffering coming from the hands of their own hypocrisy? Mankar, the son of Haymon Camoran, the almost-liberator of Valenwood, finds it fitting to speak out against the Empire, and does so on their own terms—as a minister. Seeing as the Divines do not care for his people (elves), and seeing that the Daedra are much more effective in responding, Mankar seeks the help of Mehrunes Dagon, the Prince of Revolution, Destruction, and Hope—Revolution against the stagnant and hypocritical ways of the Imperial Cult, the Destruction of the corrupt Empire, and Hope for a better future to come. Mankar becomes a priest of sorts, writing sermons on the state of the Empire and the Imperial Cult.

He reaches the hearts and minds of the poor, impoverished, and down-trodden of society. With Dagon’s help, he is able to create a pocket-realm of Oblivion, Paradise, as a refuge* for his new followers. As his influence grows, so does his ability to do something about the Empire’s hypocrisy, and so he begins to act.

*I genuinely do not know why Paradise turns out to be a surprise torture realm. This just feels like the devs wanting to point and Mankar and go “Look! Evil elf!” This is especially damning considering that Paradise looks like an Ayleid city, and that most (maybe all?) of the victims of this torture-realm are humans. So, Paradise is a representation of human Tamriel under Ayleid rule? Okay, Todd.

Mankar is working with Dagon to bring about the New Dawn: an age free of the Empire, perhaps a restart of the kalpa itself, so that Tamriel will be free from the choking grasp of the Divines and their mortal rulers. Mankar is willing to kill for this, perhaps because he knows everyone will reawaken in a better Era, or perhaps because he is aware that none of it will matter with the New Dawn, or perhaps because he has stopped having sympathy for anyone still supporting the Empire and the Imperial Cult. However you want to string it, he knows he has to get the Daedra on the field to make anything happen, and so he collects his followers and makes an attack against the throne. They kill every Septim (or so they think), and with Uriel’s death, they are now able to open Oblivion Gates across Tamriel. The Revolution part of the plan is complete, and now Dagon and his forces can bring about the Destruction of the Empire. Those who understand the Empire’s corruption will join Mankar in Paradise, and those who don’t will be killed—whether this is a mercy or a punishment is up to further interpretation.

And so exists Mankar Camoran, finding it unjust to simply sit aside and allow the Divines-backed Empire to kill the world slowly with its corruption. If it’s going down, it might as well go down with some hope of a brighter future. Mankar Camoran, the son of a failed liberator, a prince never-to-be, sees fit to eliminate a future of lies, corruption, and death by the Empire and create a new world—a better world.

This can then branch into more interpretations. The player can decide if Mankar is making a leap in logic, or if he’s doing the wrong thing for the right reason, or if he just straight up is doing the best thing possible for the situation. There could also be a lot more done about Dagon’s own motivations for this: does he feel sympathy for elves, and thus backs Mankar’s cause? Does he want to stick it to the Divines? Is there something else he wants to obtain from Nirn’s destruction? Explanations could go anywhere, and it’s sad that the game offers us nothing.

Either way, I feel like a lot of players would be able to sympathize more with Mankar if he was truly presented as a grey villain like this. As he’s presented in game, he’s simply a stupid cult leader with no sense of focus for the subject at hand. With a little more polish, though, he could be a revolutionary gone too far, or not far enough depending on how you play your character.

To me, Mankar is a representation of how the perfect blend of in-lore propaganda, real-world bias, and developer oversight created the most forgettable and laughable villain in TES, yet so full of untapped potential. Mankar is uncared for because of his apparent “stupidity,” but too much of the fandom fails to recognize that he was not intentionally written this way, and his presentation in game is a broken mirror of who the devs, creator, and supporters of Oblivion wanted him to be.

Mankar Camoran, objectively, is a revolutionary, the son of a revolutionary, and seeks freedom from the corruption of the Empire—an empire that advocates for genocide, winks at hypocrisy, and allows poverty to flourish. Who wouldn’t want to try and overturn a system like that?

Mankar Camoran was right.

[balanceoflightanddark]

Hey, I know that the recent comic has gotten everyone down and out of sorts about Azula’s and the treatment form the bigwigs towards both Azula and subset of fans, it was quite a disappointing in many aspects.

Have you ever played Skyrim? Well one of my favorite characters in that game is Paarthurnax. Who was at one point dragon that enforced his elder brother Alduin’s tyranny over the Nordic populace of Skyrim, and helped his brother shirk his duty in ushering in the end of the Kalpa. Until though various reasons (including divine intervention…) he changed his ways and joined the Nords in their just rebellion.

After the war was won he sought seclusion and a life of contemplation and isolation on the “throat of the world” (the tallest mountain in the game lore). Almost like he was a medieval Stylite. Though the fact he was a dragon with wings does kind of take away from that a bit…

So Paarthurnax was an actual remorseful Philsopher who lived life as a hermit of sorts. Basically becoming the Iroh like figure the ATLA fandom likes to pretend Iroh is.

But during the game Paarthurnax says an amazing quote that stuck with me "What is better: to be born good or to overcome your evil nature through great effort?".

So Azula was a bully as a kid, whoopty fuckin doo. That doesn’t change that she fought and bled for her nation, was prepared to sacrifice her own life at multiple points in the story (such as during the eclipse for example or at the Air Temple) for its betterment (or at least was she was taught would be the Fire Nations betterment). In a similar vein to how Iroh did. Only much more successfully and bloodlessly.

Because while I reject the silly fandom notion that she was born wholly and utterly evil, she was raised in the Fire Nation’s imperial system. And has to overcome that taught imperialistic beliefs through “great effort” (which I think is happening to do in your story).

So anyway, this was my long winded way of saying, thank you for writing an awesome story (though ongoing) and we can all (or at least I am) consider to be the actual canon and ending for Azula!

Thanks for the response. I AM working on Chapter 24. It's just I had a lot of work this week and I've got a project for school. Finals are coming up, and I want to focus on that a bit. I'll still try to fit in as much work as I can.

Anyways, the comic. Yeesh. Do I even need to say anything about what a mess that was? I'm just shocked that they made almost every Fire Nation character, sans Azula, unlikable at this point. Which is incredible. We have two victims of abuse (Ursa and Zuko), an old regretful general (Iroh), two girls mistreated by the system (Mai and Ty Lee), and a toddler (Kiyi). You'd have to go out of your way to make those characters insufferable, yet somehow they found a way. On accident. By their creators. That's got to be near impossible odds, isn't it? Somebody do the math for me. I need to know.

It would almost be awe-inspiring if it weren't so rage-inducing. And they didn't go out of their way to insult Azula's fans. And they didn't pretend these guys were the pinnacle of morality or something.

Which is part of the reason I love Paarthurnax so much. There's a good reason why he's my favorite character in Skyrim, and he's a fan favorite overall. Simply put, he basically is what people would imagine Iroh to be. He formerly supported his brother Alduin in subjugating mortals before turning against him. When we meet him in-game, he's become enlightened and offers to guide the Dragonborn in the way of the Voice.

Here's what makes him compelling: Paarthurnax knows damn well what he did was wrong. He knows that people won't forgive him like the Blades if they find out who he is and admits he'd do the same if he were in their shoes. Hell, he's correct in saying that trusting a dragon like him is a big gamble. But that's what makes him compelling. Rather than giving into his instinct to dominate and his background of oppressing others, Paarthurnax sought to meditate and work on addressing his issues. He used to look down on mortals, so he befriends mortals and aids them in their time of need. He used the Voice to dominate the "weak", so he teaches others the Voice and establishes the Greybeards on how the Voice should be used. He aided Alduin, and so he willingly aided the heroes the first time around, aids the Dragonborn in their quest to stop his brother, and fights Alduin himself when they cross paths.

Paarthurnax knows he can do evil, so he makes damn sure that the chances of that happening are slim. "What is better: to be born good or to overcome your evil nature through great effort?". There is a reason that quote is so poignant. He's saying that anybody can overcome their dark side if they work on it, and it's more rewarding to actually tackle their problems instead of ignoring them.

It's what an Azula redemption arc should be about. She should acknowledge her dark side and that she's a bad person, but resolve to try and fix it. She's already halfway there. She's questioning herself in the mirror scene. Even in the comics, it's shown she is willing to change her behavior and bury her grudges if given the opportunity. The problem is that she doesn't see herself as worth salvaging, and nobody is willing to argue against her. That's the ultimate tragedy and something that could work for almost all the Fire Nation characters. How do you be good when you've done so much wrong? Zuko's struggled with it. Iroh's struggled with it. So why not Azula and all the rest?

That's what I hope to accomplish with my story. She's not there yet and she's going to be making some mistakes in the coming chapters. But I'm hoping to get her there. Thank you so much for the ask and I hope to get back to working on the fic as soon as I can.

[yanderemommabean]

Playing Skyrim again and damn Alduin can get it with that voice! Listening to all of his voice clips, used and unused, and when he acknowledges and praises you. I get the feeling that "my teeth to your neck dovahkin" for a yandere Alduin doesn't mean he wants to kill you lol.

"My teeth in your neck and my seed in your womb" is more along the lines of what he'd say. You're telling me he isn't down bad for someone able to kill him? Please.

"Such a strong warrior, wasted. Betrayed and belittled at every turn. The arrogance of your kind never ceases". You'll be trapped and curled in his tail, looking up to see the true eyes of evil as he stares at you almost amused.

Try as you might, fighting is futile, this beast is going to do with you as he pleases. You're the fearsome Dragonborn, surely you can survive whatever he dished out right?

Until you land in his nest in what seems to be another world entirely, and realize he didn't exactly plan on killing you.

-Mommabean

[obsidiancreates]

"Can you believe this?" Sheogorath gestures at the image of Mundas playing out in the bowl between them and Martin. "Banning Talos worship."

Martin shakes his head. "A troubling path for the world to take."

"I didn't collect all those damn armor pieces including his for him to be declared not a true divine! I should tell my followers to start saying I'm not a Daedra just to prove a point."

"I'm not sure it'll have the impact you hope for."

"Because if the madness?"

"In part."

"Mmm. ... We should reach out to that Dragonbornthat Akatosh has spent all this time crafting once they get their destiny rolling. They'll be a good errand runner!"

"They're meant for much more."

"After the whole Alduin thing then."

"... I don't see why we shouldn't. Once Alduin is dealt with."

"There's my Martin." Sheogorath winks. "But we'll set them against Imperials and Stormcloaks alike, right?"

"Of course. To force them to chose one side or the other with no alternatives would be ridiculous."

[the-elder-polls]

its friday, so may I request your craziest headcanons 👀🫵

sure why not im insane for fun

nerevar was a shezzarine and the nerevarine is a shezzarine by extension

every player character carries/embodies an aspect of lorkhan and can be considered a shezzarine (can you tell i have a thing for shezzarines)

pelinal was something almost like a Prisoner. not fully a Prisoner, but very damn close

nerevar's murder was a dragon break; thus, voryn killed him, the tribunal killed him, dumac killed him, and so on. they're all right and they're all wrong

miraak had the raw strength to kill alduin, but lacked the discipline and strategy to do so safely. he could've done it, yeah - he just would've died in the process

[billveusay]

I watched Gundam Zeta and...

When looking at gundam series rankings, one name always hovers towards the top. The successor that did it better. The one that solidifed Gundam as a powerhouse franchise after the success of the movies in theaters with its darker and more mature storyline.

And I really didn't like it much.

It's one of those cases where the opinion seems so unanimously positive that I genuinely think I missed something. Maybe its partly the fault of the subtitles and some stuff got lost in translation. Also, it has been a few months since I finished Zeta and I could remember things wrong. So as usual, just my opinion, influenced by likely biases and misinterpretations, don't take it as an attack if you liked Zeta.

Let's start with how derivative it is. At first, I didn't mind because it was obvious the show was building itself as a mirror to Mobile Suit Gundam. A "What if Amuro picked the stormcloaks over the empire when Alduin attacked?", so to speak. However, the more the show went on, the harder it became to maintain my goodwill. Kamille, the simili-Amuro winds up on a simili-White Base, gets a simili-Fraw Bow taking care of simili-Katz, Kikka and the other one, plus a blonde rival. You don't even get a simili-Bright because they straight up bring him back. And sometimes it really doesn't make sense, like when they paint over the Titans colors on the Gundam MkII... with the Federation colors. Look, I'm french, I know how good red, white and blue look together but pick your own identity, guys, the federation are still your enemies.

And many of those echoes felt like a downgrade. For the first half of the show, Kamille is insufferable, and while that's intentional and I'll admit he gets better, he doesn't get that much better. He's less prone to angry fits over the slightest inconvenience and elevates to being prone to angry fits over moderate inconveniences at worst. Pop the champagne. I'm actually wondering if he doesn't come off as less of an annoying, impulsive kid because they add Katz to the team as a fresh, even more annoying impulsive kid, so Kamille looks better by contrast.

Fa Yuri is also just a lesser Frau Bow, and I wasn't the biggest Frau Bow stan ever. She mainly comes accross as catty (she says "Kamille!" with the same reprehensive tone so many times I can hear it in my sleep), and while Kamille provides her with ample reasons to be annoyed with him, what I don't get are reasons for why they are supposedly close enough for Fa to act jealous whenever Kamille looks at another female character.

But my main gryps... I mean gripe with Zeta is that everyone is stupid. All the time. Do you know how many times someone makes an unauthorized mobile suit sortie in the original ? Twice, and they both get locked up in the brig after the fact. Do you know how many times that happens in Zeta ? Neither do I, I've lost count. And most of the insubordinates get away with a typical Bright slap. "My superiors don't trust me, so I'm gonna go out and fight in a mobile suit to show them" is the most common occurence, "I'm a prisoner and I'm gonna steal a mobile suit to escape" happens at least twice... and the more it occurs the more it makes me wonder why there's not a system in place to prevent unauthorized launches. Cause once someone gets in the cockpit, everyone around just goes "damn, it's too late to stop them now!". At one point Bright just gives up and says "ah screw it, this will be character building".

Far from the only moments that made me wonder how both armies can even be halfway functional. Another is the legendary exchange between Jerid and Sarah (I will transcribe the subtitles so if this is a translation error, you can blame them and not me). "I didn't expect that I'd be ordered to babysit little children like you" "For your information Lieutenant, I've had sufficient training!" "You two are newtype candidates selected by Scirocco. But look at your hands, probably never hurt a soul in your life. Are you really prepared to kill?" "No, I will never kill!" "...then what are you a mobile suit pilot for?!"

Very good question Jerid. This somewhat diminishes the status of Scirocco as a master planner if he forgot to ask candidates if they were down for killing before sending them to kill people.

You also get Wong refusing to evacuate the city of Granada even as a colony is about to drop on it, because "if they evacuate, the public to lose confidence in the AEUG's abilities". And I think we're supposed to believe that he's right. This is the same episode where Sarah, then imprisoned in the Argama, convinces Katz to let her out, give her a normal suit and lead her back to her mobile suit so she can... teach him how to pilot better. And he falls for it.

Granted, he's a kid. But if he demonstrably cannot be trusted to not free a prisoner he was told not to let out because of a little crush, despite (this will become a theme) having only met her five minutes ago, then the whole command chain of the Argama looks stupid for ever trusting him again with a mobile suit or a fighter jet. An attribute he shares with Jerid.

One of the biggest mysteries to me is how that guy can keep seemingly climbing the ranks of the Titans and being put in charge of things when he doesn't get a single W. Every single time he makes a sortie, he fails. No exception. If we're supposed to believe that he's a genuine threat and an actual rival to Kamille, then it's a complete failure. If he is supposed to be a loser, then I wonder what the point is because... well they don't do anything with him. He gets angrier and angrier, but still doesn't accomplishes anything, impact other characters or come to any realization. He just repeateadly screws up and eventually dies, and his death doesn't even get much focus.

Otherwise... well you have Reccoa "Defecting to the side of genocide because she wants to be seen as a woman and not a soldier" Londe not bringing many prizes home either. There are pretty convincing arguments to explain why she's not that badly written, but I'd still say that she's at best an interesting character concept very poorly executed. I'll probably develop my opinion on how an author has some responsibility if a character he makes is (unintentionnaly) widely hated when we get to Quess Paraya.

God, this is running too long again. Er...

Paptimus has the vibes of a great villain but it never seems like he has much of a plan beyond "not slapping people makes them more disposed towards alliances" and using his newtype powers to charm girls. And between the fact that it is always girls, and that the two female cyber-newtypes are psychological messes, while the other cyber-newtype guy seem perfectly well adjusted... it feels iffy.

And coming back to the praises of Zeta being darker... I mean yes, more people die in Zeta, but then they also have much less impact. The crew is not the same after Ryu dies, Bright gets (literally) sick with grief. Same with Matilda. And the villains deaths are also given weight. Garma's becomes a propaganda tool in the hands of Gihren, to the despair of his father, which is the first time they show us how disfunctional the Zabis are. Plus, we get a whole episode where Garma's lover tries to avenge him by sacrificing herself to destroy the white base. They even did the same thing with Ramba Ral.

Meanwhile, the last 8 to 6 episodes of Zeta are almost hilarious with how many character get unalived in a small amount of time. BOOM! Rip Sarah. BOOM! Bye Jerid. BOOM! See you Katz. BOOM! So long Bask. And theoretically, yeah, it's darker to have more characters die but I wouldn't give the show props for it if its just tying loose ends with a damn chainsaw. They all happen so fast they become meaningless.

There's probably more things I have to say but the series also has a lot of qualities. So let's talk about those.

I really like how they handled the returning cast members from Mobile Suit Gundam. They pretty much all felt like natural evolutions from their characters (the Star Wars sequels could have taken a few lessons from it). Char Quattro is definitely one of the best parts of the series, and I like how they treated my boy Kai. Making him a full-time member of the resistance would have been weird given his dislike for the army, but they show how much courage he's gained by making him a badass war reporter. And Bright is... an unmoving traffic cone in the long winding road that is the Universal Century. As for the newcomers, despite most female characters being very hit or miss, two of the best characters are undeniably Emma Sheen and Haman Karn. The series gets much better once she gets introduced. And even though the atmospheric re-entry episode was another MGS echo, the ballutes concept still made it one of my favourite Gundam episodes period.

Animation has also improved leagues beyond MSG, so did the mecha design. The Gundam MkII looks great, I love the Hyaku ✨Shiny✨, and we even get a preview of the Sazabi (one of the best looking mobile suits ever) with the Marasai.

And finally, the memes. They're probably what made the show go from ok to enjoyable for me. The neverending slaps, "I'm an autistic child", "I have never betrayed anyone in my entire life", Kamille pointing to Katz saying "he's okay" seconds before Katz explodes... the show is very generous in that regard. Okay, calling it now. Again, this is my opinion of a 40 yo anime with probably imperfect subtitles that I watched several months ago. There are so many factors independant from the series that potentially prevented me from enjoying it as much as I could, so this post is not an analysis but just an explanation of why I didn't like, and I really hope you will! But please stop leaving the keys in the mobile suits.

...OH GOD! Almost forgot the best part: half of the episodes ending in tragedy, with a character in tears screaming in a cockpit or curled up in his bed, sad music, fade to black, and...

🎶 Ooooh, I can't help believing you! 🎶

Good night!

My gundam reviews :

> Hathaway's Spark > Mobile Suit Gundam > Gundam Zeta > 0083: Stardust Memory > 0080: War in the Pocket > 8th MS Team > The Witch from Mercury > Gundam Thunderbolt > The Origin > Turn A Gundam > F91 > Gundam Unicorn > Gundam 00 > MS IGLOO > Gundam Narrative > Iron-Blooded Orphans

[kookaburra1701]

WIP Wednesday: Katabasis

I was tagged by @saltymaplesyrup, @gilgamish, @moriche, and @dirty-bosmer last week, thank you, friends!

I am tagging you all back because I wasn't prepared for last week, also @tallmatcha and @expended-sleeper

Fandom: The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim Rating: T (blood and violence) Category: Gen Genre(s): Action/Adventure Main characters: Khemor gro-Skaven (Male Orc LDB), Calder, Gregor

Summary: A prequel for Nostos, detailing how Khemor went from a senior magus in the College of Whispers to becoming the Last Dragonborn, Thane of Windhelm and the Pale, confidant of Ulfric Stormcloak and traitor to the Empire.

Big thanks to @saltymaplesyrup for bringing the fact that Alduin's appearances are always heralded by absolutely atrocious weather and storms in-game to my attention. :]

=================================

A twig snapped to Calder’s left. He turned, hand on his axe.

“Hail, Companion,” Garmr said before Calder was able to pick out the figure standing at the edge of the glade.

“Hail,” answered a deep voice. A man stepped away from the tree where he had been leaning. The moonslight gleamed off of the wolfshead that adorned the armor he wore—and off the man’s bald pate. Calder and Garmr released their weapons, and approached.

“What business do the Companions have in Eastmarch?” Garmr’s tone was friendly, but authoritative.

The Companion’s eyes flickered to the snarling bears on their blue surcoats that set them apart from the common hold guards, but he smiled and his posture remained relaxed. “We were hired as an escort. Our patron desired fresh air.” He motioned northward, towards the clearing where a tall, robed figure stood with its back to them. “Mage from the south, traveling to the College.”

Calder squinted through the gloom, but the deep shadows obscured any movements the figure was making. A wizard from Cyrodiil? That warranted investigation; no telling what sort of mischief one of those could get up to, this close to Jarl Ulfric’s own city.

“I’ll have some questions for him, for our report.” Garmr seemed to share Calder’s suspicions.

“Of course.” The Companion led the way across the grass. “Sir,” he called out, voice carrying in the still night air. The figure turned, face shrouded by a deep hood.

“Is there a problem, Skjor?” the mage answered. His voice was deeper and more resonant than Skjor’s, and held a note of wariness.

“No problem, sir. Just a patrol with some questions. As I told you to expect.”

A barren hump of earth girded by a pale ring of stones appeared through the grass as they approached. The Companion’s patron had been staring at it.

“Hail, wizard,” Garmr said, in the deep voice he had started adopting since being promoted to second-in-command.

“Hail.” A puff of vapor accompanied the words from beneath the figure’s hood. The man was leaning heavily on a black cane topped by a handle of carved bone, his hands dark shapes against the white ivory.

A Redguard? From Cyrodiil, not Hammerfell? thought Calder. A chill chased its way down his spine.

“Damned early for a first snow—” said Skjor to Calder’s right. He was holding out a gloved hand, squinting at snowflakes settling on his palm.

Calder glanced up in confusion. The clear late-summer night of a few moments ago had vanished; the sky above him was thick with swirling white snowfall. It hit his face with tiny stinging needles of cold, and obscured his vision as it clung to his eyelashes.

[umbracirrus]

Sujamma Sundas

Tagged in this by @skyrim-forever, and I will take literally any excuse to ramble on about my idiots <3

This week, Sujamma wants to know about YOUR OC's special someone. What makes their relationship special? How did they meet? Were they enemies to lovers? Lovers to enemies? Lovers AND Enemies? Are they romantic or platonic? What's their favorite way to cuddle? Favorite date night? Anything and everything you can think of 💕

Tagging @thequeenofthewinter, @hircines-hunter. @illumiera, @friend-of-giants, anyone else who wants to do this <3

As I said, of course, I'm going to talk about my idiots Elyse and Balgruuf-!!

These have their first meeting, as is typical for many dragonborn and the Jarl of Whiterun, with Elyse going to Dragonsreach to seek aid for Riverwood on the behest of the town residents. Elyse hurts herself on the journey there though, so rather than immediately sending her to Farengar and Bleak Falls Barrow, he sends her to the Temple of Kynareth to be healed and pays for a meal and a room at the Bannered Mare, asking for her to return after she has rested to do that favour. To be completely honest, Balgruuf has already started falling for her at this point. This survivor of Helgen, with little to her name, putting her life at risk to protect his people and asking for nothing in return? And she's pretty? And she's the damned Dragonborn?!?! Making her Thane of the city and giving her the axe of Whiterun is basically flirting with the way that he's giving her heart eyes, even if he doesn't realise or think of it as such.

So yeah, main quest happens, he remains a stalwart ally of hers through it all, is over the moon(s) that she decides to buy Breezehome, and lingers on the Dragonsreach porch for ages after she flies off to defeat Alduin. Then when he hears that she's returned, he doesn't wait for her to visit him in Dragonsreach, he goes to find her to check up on her. These idiots get drunk, dance, almost kiss, and don't remember any of it. Only Lydia does.

Elyse meanwhile, she starts falling for Balgruuf bad when he defends her from Ulfric, allows her to stay in Dragonsreach, does everything in his power to keep her safe. She's in denial about it for ages, at least until she gets teased about it by Lydia, then it hits her like a tonne of bricks that she's down bad.

From there, they are both just... oh, they are pining. They are pining bad. The majority of Whiterun seems to think that they are already together, so when they finally get together...? It's not a surprise for the people of the city (though it is for people beyond, who had no idea just how painful their pining was). Hrongar likely had some sort of bet going on with Irileth, Lydia, and other people in Dragonsreach about how long it takes for them to finally kiss and/or sleep together.

The thing is, when these two are together, as soon as behind closed doors they are completely sappy and affectionate. Holding hands, cuddling, the works. And they are sentimental. They get engaged exactly four years after their first meeting, for example. Balgruuf takes interest in her hobbies of gardening and alchemy for her, and Elyse likes to listen to him read history books aloud simply because he likes them and she likes his voice.

And nobody dares interrupt them when they are on the balcony atop Dragonsreach, that is their place, their sanctuary from their responsibilities, and Divines forbid somebody interrupt their intense make out session/stargazing/cuddle time out there.

Even better about their relationship is that Elyse gets along well with each of Balgruuf's children, and Balgruuf appreciates it beyond belief - she somehow manages to help with bringing them closer together whereas in the past they ended up quite distant, even more so when the idiots have their daughter Aina after being married for a few years.

[jackals-ships]

anyways "jackal is this all partially an excuse for jackals jumping alduin in later story arcs" yes it is 😌

[blackmonitor]

Alduin Inspired by Surrogate from @mighty-peacock and @thebeastinsideusallarchive

And also Daedras be Damned, from @mighty-peacock

Watch the (sky) tags!

[argisthebulwark]

TES Summer Fest Day Five: Crown/Gentle

summary: She's done it. Alduin is slain, the war is settled, finally Skyrim will know peace - but will she ever get a shot at a normal life? f!LDB/ Bodyguard Vilkas warnings: just a lil bit of angst i guess a/n: Characters taken from my Bodyguard Vilkas story - i just felt like they'd fit :) @tes-summer-fest TES Summerfest Masterlist

"Dragonborn." Balgruuf's voice demands the crowd's attention and Rin flinches at the weight of their gaze. She counts each breath, sucking in the stuffy air and focusing on the Jarl's boot to keep herself steady.

"We are honored to recognize the contributions you have made to the people of Whiterun and Skyrim." She should be honored as well but the most she can manage is a stiff nod. Her neck muscles scream as the weight of that damned crown is placed so carefully on top of her head, sweat already gathering under its rim.

"You, the Last Dragonborn, Alduin's Doom - too many titles to recount. We offer this crown and a place of glory in our fine city." The Jarl's good natured chuckle does little to calm her nerves. Rin's sweaty fingers wrap around the hilt of that decorative sword she'd been instructed to hold. Apparently the actual weapon that had slain Alduin wasn't flashy enough.

"Thank you." She pants, joints and armor creaking as she attempts to raise from a kneel. Rin stares out at the crowd, faces blending together into one mess of smiles and wide eyes. She should say something heroic, something inspirational for all the hopeful little faces peering up at her but her mind is utterly blank.

"Dragonborn." Vilkas' smooth voice cuts through all the noise and drags her back to reality. "Someone's asking for a moment with you."

"Who?" Rin and Balgruuf inquire in unison, her heart racing at the thought of carrying a conversation in her state. She can stomach their platitudes and offer vague thanks but anything deeper may be beyond her.

"It'll only take a moment." Vilkas avoids answering, though the strong fingers at her elbow are insistent. He drags her away from the slowly encroaching crowd, leaving Irileth and Balgruuf to regale the civilians with stories in her stead.

Luckily, the patio is free of people. Rin shuffles toward the railing overlooking the gorgeous plains that surround the city and sucks down a deep breath. The air is sweet and fresh, blessedly free of the rich scent of food and drink she's been stuck in for hours. Vilkas appears at her side without a word, a comforting hand placed on her back.

"Who requested my presence?" She asks far too late, pink coloring her cheeks at her carelessness. Scanning the horizon she feels the hammering of her heart slow to a crawl.

"Me." Vilkas grumbles, already unlatching the hefty armor. A laugh bubbles up through all the tension and Rin rolls her shoulders, grateful for his intuition. She allows Vilkas to remove the gaudy golden plates, tossing them carelessly into a pile.

"Be careful, that likely cost a fortune."

"Don't care." He keeps working until she's left in plain clothes, a tunic and trousers that seem awfully out of place among all the nobles. Rin gazes up at Vilkas, each breath unlabored as she sucks them in.

"That looks ridiculous on you." He sneers, poking playfully at the crown weighing her head down. Rin rolls her eyes and shoves it back into place despite the tension building in her shoulders.

"The council would throw a fit if I took it off." She grumbles, leaning eagerly into his touch. Vilkas' fingers mindlessly swipe at the hair falling into her face and gods, she wishes she could thank him for all he does. He's always there to hold her up when she's ready to crumble, a quiet presence that keeps her going.

"You're more than their shiny hero to trot out." He reminds her, gruff voice suddenly so soft. Rin nearly melts into his arms at the words only he bothers to say. Vilkas isn't one for flowery words or poetry but gods, Rin's never felt loved so wholly than when his rich brown eyes stare down at her.

"Feelin' better?" He finally asks, a quick kiss pressed to her sweaty brow.

"As good as one can be in this situation." Rin clears her throat, ignoring the nervous racing of her heart at the thought of reentering that hall. Vilkas offers her the customary arm, allowing her to cling to his side as he leads her back into the horde.

"Your armor is gone." Farengar instantly notices, brows tightening at her appearance. She opens her mouth, ready to ramble off some excuse before a sharp elbow cuts her off.

"The Dragonborn worried that appearing fully armored would make the people worry there's another foe." Vilkas lies so smoothly even Rin begins to believe it. "Unarmed conveys safety - and isn't that what you're always prattling on about?"

"Very well."

The rest of the evening is fairly easy; recounting the same story until her mouth runs dry, a migraine building behind her temples with each hour the crown weighs down her head, Vilkas' comforting touches keeping her from mouthing off to whatever noble simply insists that she join them for dinner. Her smile is false and her cheeks burn but somehow they make it through the evening.

"Vilkas." Balgruuf's voice cuts through the relatively comfortable silence and Rin's heart nearly stops. "Allow me a moment alone with the Dragonborn."

"I'm not to leave her side."

"No harm will befall her in my halls."

"I will be back in one minute." Vilkas' voice is deadly and cold when he exits the room, surely just outside. Rin can hardly contain the litany of questions when the Jarl rounds on her once more, pointedly staring at the crown she's placed atop the table.

"It will be quite the adjustment." He comments, voice thick with what sounds almost like melancholy. "I know how hard it can be to live such a life, Dragonborn, but I commend you for your commitment."

"What commitment?" Rin has no more capacity for platitudes, her voice harsh from nerves worn too thin.

"The crown, the sword, your place in our city - many changes will happen in the coming days as you settle into your new life."

"Please, fill me in on these changes." Rin's voice quivers but she holds her chin high. Suddenly the weight of that crown seems far heavier than she'd known.

"Well, you are a symbol to the people." Balgruuf steeples his fingers, still staring down at the crown. "I'm afraid that you cannot return to the life you once led."

"Why?"

"You could become a political target or the rumors of cultists crawling over our shores could prove to be an issue."

"I slay dragons. I can handle it." Her voice wobbles pathetically at the prospect of being stuck in this gilded cage for the rest of her days. She'd gone through hell and returned in one piece for the chance at regaining her life.

"We simply cannot allow the hero of our people to be harmed, surely you understand." Balgruuf sighs, clearly exhausted from their most commonly rehashed argument. "We will of course allow Vilkas to return to Jorrvaskr and a rotation of our finest guards will take his place."

No.

No.

"If I accept this crown - this position, whatever it is you're offering me, I lose him?" Rin feels so far from her body, mind floating out of reach at the mere thought of losing Vilkas. She can stomach a lot of bullshit but this is too much.

"He's a fine man." In a moment of unusual friendship, Balgruuf pats at her clammy hand. "But you are a hero. You are the Last Dragonborn - do not throw it all away."

"I refuse." She's gasping the words before she can process them, instinctively rejecting a life that does not involve him. Snippets of her future flash through her mind, each more terrifying than the last; stuck in Dragonsreach only to be trotted out on special occasions, married off to some political powerhouse she's never met, boring days and lonely nights spent languishing in a comfortable cage she allowed herself to be locked in.

"Dragonborn, you must think this through. This is the rest of your life, the hope of our people rely on you. He is a good man, but -"

"I don't care." Rin's laugh is high pitched and sounds off in her ears but she's breaking. She cannot stomach a life without him, isn't strong enough to grin and bear it for another day. "I cannot - I will not do this."

"I urge you to reconsider." The Jarl warns as she stands, that familiarity entirely gone from his voice. The crown scrapes across his table when Rin scoots it far away, retreating toward the door Vilkas exited only a moment before.

"You alright?" Vilkas' rough voice is like music to her ears. Rin is grabbing blindly at his arms and tugging him toward the exit, excitement bubbling up in her chest at the prospect.

"I said no." She grins, blissfully unaware of the many eyes watching her gracelessly drag Vilkas out of Dragonsreach. She traipses past the pile of gilded armor and beautifully crafted sword that would never see battle, head thankfully free of that heavy crown.

"Said no to what?"

"All of it." Her cheeks still burn but gods, it's the first smile that's felt real all day. "Let's go home."