#cw slight transphobia

[maryloomis]

my mary (and lila) loomis headcanons (some of which I plan to incorporate in fanfic):

cw: abuse for a lot of them (also mentions of csa, r*pe and slight transphobia)

Mary was conceived in Lila’s hotel room on that first night that Lila & Sam first investigated Norman. they both got drunk and commiserated/trauma bonded over Marion’s murder & had a one night-stand

because both sleeping with your sister’s fiancé AND having a child out of wedlock were unacceptable in 1959/1960, and abortion was illegal, they eloped/had a shotgun wedding before Lila was even visibly pregnant at all, let alone gave birth

the Crane side of the family was very strict and conservative and they disowned both of their daughters, Marion (posthumously) for being a thief and Lila for getting pregnant with her former future brother-in-law’s child

Lila was actually the screw-up/black sheep/“wild child” while Marion was the golden child when they were teens and in their early 20s (which is part of why Marion found stealing the $40,000 so thrilling…..it’s because she’d never done anything like it before in her life) until she got her shit together

Lila is younger than Marion by 3 years

Mary is named after Marion (obv)

Mary is an only child (obv)

Mary is a Virgo born in September (since Marion’s murder & everything w/ Norman happened in December)

since Norman being incarcerated took place in December, and he’s released 22 years after (which would be 1981), in Psycho II Mary is 20, turning 21 that September

Mary is in her junior year of college in Psycho II, and she's studying forensic psychology specifically bc of the Norman Bates case and how it affected her. She wants to become either a forensic investigator, FBI agent, or go to the police academy when she graduates

Lila and Sam were incompatible bc they barely knew each other prior to getting married so they had countless arguments (many of which were over how to discipline toddler Mary — Lila was authoritarian, Sam was more carefree and wanted to let little Mary do whatever she wanted)

one of Mary’s first memories at age 3 is of her parents fighting

Sam died in a car accident when Mary was 4 so she has little to no memory of her dad, she’s only ever known Lila

Lila never remarried; she raised Mary completely by herself actually no this is a fucking lie. she remarried ONE piece of shit guy who started (CW: CSA) sexually abusing Mary when she was a young child. when Mary tried telling her mom about it, Lila refused to believe her & thought she was lying. Oh yeah, this guy is also a wealthy asswipe and he moved them into his megamansion. They divorced shortly before Psycho II (hence Lila still going by ‘Loomis’) but that was because he left Lila for a younger woman, not bc of the CSA

Lila (as overcompensation for how her parents treated her, and how she used to be, and out of resentment at Sam because she thinks Marion’s death is all his fault, and now he’s dead too and she could never get any closure and she’s stuck with this child) ramps up the hardcore disciplinarianism and starts physically disciplining Mary whenever she does wrong, this starts when Mary is 5

Mary takes after Sam in looks, which only adds to Lila’s rage & resentment

Lila became an alcoholic after Marion’s death (sometimes her drinking would be why her and Sam would fight) and it worsened after Sam’s death. Her alcohol abuse only exacerbated her physical abuse towards Mary

Lila has only once in her life ever told Mary “I love you,” other than that she doesn’t say it. And she‘s never uttered that phrase to Sam either

When fighting with Sam—and usually while Lila was drunk—Lila would scream at him that Marion’s death was all his fault, because it was because of him that Marion stole the money that led her to the Bates Motel, and that she wished she’d never met or married him and wished she never had his “bastard child” (Mary)….. in front of Mary

Lila would rant while drunk about Norman and wanting to kill him

Mary was a social outcast her whole life who got bullied in elementary and middle school and barely made any friends

Mary lost her virginity at 14 (which infuriated Lila when she found out)

Mary once got pregnant at 15 but she had a miscarriage

⬆️ both times made her get beaten SENSELESS by Lila

Mary developed hypersexuality & started sleeping around in high school in order to cope with her mom’s beatings & her stepdad’s sexual abuse (and stop feeling pressured to be a good modest Catholic schoolgirl), which got her branded a slut/whore and she had to change schools twice bc of it

Lila weirdly 'found God' and became a Christian in the middle of Mary's high school years (didn't stop the beatings tho). The second school she put Mary in was a Catholic school, wherein she further rebelled

Mary has an eating disorder and body image issues

Mary is a huge fan of heavy metal and rock music (Black Sabbath, Rolling Stones, Exodus, Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, AC/DC, Aerosmith, Metallica, Motley Crue, Deep Purple, Sex Pistols, KISS, Alice Cooper, The Eagles, Blue Oyster Cult, Judas Priest etc.) but she had to hide it from her mom who thought it to be "devil music". She HATES the Beatles tho. She also loves David Bowie, and Prince, and she's also secretly a fan of stuff like Diana Ross, Donna Summer, MJ, etc.

Mary either can’t drive or doesn’t have her own car (I’m undecided on which one)

Mary's psychology class in high school once had to study the Norman Bates case for a discussion about psychotics who kill and the entire classroom turned to look at her bc they knew of her family's connection to the case; she also got mercilessly bullied for it

Mary tried to write to Norman when he was in prison exactly twice. The first time when she was 14 and it was a letter expressing hatred for him for killing her aunt and by proxy turning her mom into an alcoholic, abusive monster, the second time when she was 17 and she was curious about Norman and wanted to know more about him. Both letters were intercepted—the first one by the staff at the institution Norman was imprisoned at, the second one by Lila. And Lila absolutely lost her shit when she found it, and she screamed at Mary and called her a "traitor" to her aunt and a sick freak, and beat Mary within an inch over her life over it, to the point where Mary was purple all over from bruises, and that was the hardest her mom ever beat her. She also kicked her out of the house for a week over this & Mary was forced to stay with a dodgy male classmate who had a crush on her during that time

Mary secretly kept a newspaper that depicted Norman's mugshot from the 50s, and she would never admit it to herself but a small part of her found Norman attractive

Mary moved out of her mom's house the second she graduated high school and she only made one lasting friend which was her roommate in her college dorm (this roommate is also who introduced Mary to smoking weed); this is the "girlfriend" she makes reference to living with when she tries to leave Norman's house

Mary met Scott in college as well, he was her lab partner turned bf, and they'd been together 2 years before he cheated on her

Scott was abusive as fuck, he'd physically and emotionally abuse Mary and whenever Mary would find the strength to leave him he'd always bring her gifts and shit, or propose marriage and she'd come crawling back. It was only after she got involved with Norman that she finally was able to ditch Scott for good.

Mary started partying A LOT as soon she hit college

Mary was briefly part of a sorority until she realized it wasn’t for her

Mary almost got (CW: rape) r*ped at a frat party

Mary kissed a girl at another frat party during one of the few times she got seriously drunk

Mary originally wanted to study dance/become a dancer, specifically a ballerina, but then she switched her major to psychology (yes I took this from Meg Tilly's actual backstory)

Mary had long hair down to her waist her entire life but cut it to the mullet she has in Psycho II when she was in college. Lila was disgusted when she saw it bc she thought Mary was trying to look like "a boy"

hope y'all enjoyed these!!!

[the-real-yahoo-mail]

Uh the OP is a homophobe and a transphobe . Maybe we shouldn’t repost this.

Images below (tw blood, transphobia and homophobia, drawn dog getting killed)

[vinylfoxbooks]

October 4 - Honour | @into-the-jeggyverse | wc: 840 There's now a part 2 to this! CW: Slight transphobia and mentions of gender dysphoria

This is the last place that Regulus wants to be. He could be out with his friends, reading in his room, drawing out in the garden, anything. But of course, his mother had to stuff him into a frilly dress that he doesn’t want to wear and fits him in the worst ways and scratches at his skin. And he has to have this stupid charm that makes his hair appear longer than it is, all in front of the same people that his parents have been posturing and making deals with for years. 

Of course, Barty and Evan were here, but both of them ran off and Regulus isn’t sure that he wants to seek them out, so he’s stuck here. In the corner, cradling a glass of wine, watching as all of the stuck up and stuffy people in the room play nice while trying to get what they want. 

Other than his friends, the only person that Regulus would have to entertain him would be his brother, though he isn’t sure where Sirius ran off to. That is, until someone comes up to him and leans against the wall, their shoulder nearly brushing with his. 

Regulus turns his head to give them a harsh glare, though it softens when he sees just who is standing next to him, breathing out, “James? What are you doing here?”

James shrugs, “Sirius told Remus and I that you guys were being forced to attend the party that your parents were throwing and so we hatched a plan for him to sneak us in. I don’t know exactly where Remus and Sirius went off to, but Sirius pointed me in your direction and dragged Remus away, probably to his room.”

“Didn’t need to know that much,” Regulus grimaces, “But you didn’t have to come. One of us could get in trouble if my parents notice that you’re hanging around with me.”

“What’s the fun in that, though?” James whines, putting on some dramatics, “I think it would be hilarious to see your parents on the edge of an aneurysm seeing you and me together.” They push themself from the wall and round him so they’re standing in front of Regulus, dipping down in a rather dramatic fashion and outreaching their hand towards him, “So, Regulus. Would you do me the honour of this dance?” 

Regulus rolls his eyes, but downs his wine and sets the glass aside to take James’ hand nonetheless, “You’re ridiculous.”

“You love me.” James smiles, standing up straight and guiding Regulus to the dance floor, “And I came to save you from a night of boredom, though I wish I could do more with the dress.”

Regulus sighs and looks down at his own attire before shaking his head and meeting their eyes, “You treating me the same is enough for now, James. Thank you for not being weird about it.” 

They shake their head and gently place their hand on his waist, their other hand still clasped, “You are still Regulus no matter what you wear, my love, no attire will change that in my eyes.”

“I love you.”

“And I love you.” James smiles, before beginning to guide them into a dance as the music changes. They get a couple glares, whether it’s because of James’s presence or because of a myriad of other reasons, but James doesn’t seem to mind them at all. At one point, James leads Regulus right in front of where Orion and Walburga are sitting and they bite their lip to force down laughter at the scoff that the woman lets out upon seeing James. 

“They’re going to kill me by the end of tonight.” Regulus groans.

“Not if you come back to my house with me, Sirius, and Remus tonight.”

Regulus shakes his head, “You know that I can’t. It’ll just be worse when I come back.”

“Then just don’t come back. We can go up to your room when you deem it appropriate, get you into more comfortable clothes, pack all of your things, and leave. For good.” They take a second to flit over Regulus’ face, taking a moment to change their pace with the change of the music around them, before humming, “I know that you say you can’t leave, but you can. You know that you’d be safe with us, you know that Sirius would be safe with us, and you know that you wouldn’t have to dress up in frilly dresses that make you hate your reflection. You know that there’s so much more to the world and to us than your parents’ iron grip.”

Regulus hums after a couple seconds, “I’ll think about it. Though I will take you up on your offer to sneak off to my room and get me into different clothes.” 

“That’s all that I ask, my love.” And with that, James glances around to make sure that nobody is watching them before dipping down and pressing a gentle kiss to Regulus’ lips, chaste and quick, but loving nonetheless.

[wangxianficfinder]

I'm in the mood for...

Aug 13th

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1. Any wangxian fanfics with straight wei wuxian having a sexuality crisis over lan wangji?

ao3 has been erroring out for me when I try to get to my bookmarks , maybe because I have so many? but for #1 , there is a tag "straight boy wei ying" /"Wei wuxian in denial about sexuality" that will give great fics. when I can get to my bookmarks I'll add my faves

show me how you do that trick by ilip13 (E, 70k, WangXian, Modern Setting Porn with Feelings, The Porn Is the Plot, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, straight boy wwx, with an aspec twist, Sexuality Crisis, Voyeurism, Blow Jobs, Hand Jobs, Masturbation, Anal Sex, Switching, Top/Bottom Versatile | Switch WangXian, Slow Burn, Except for the sex that part is on fire soooo fast, sexuality realization, Feelings Realization, Happy Ending)

The Cause Of This Fair Gift In Me Is Wanting by Alliandra (E, 47k, WangXian, LQY/QS, Modern AU, High School, College/University, Time Skips, Slow Burn, Pining, LWJ POV, LWJ Fucks, WWX dates, "Straight Boy" WWX, Homophobia, Non-Graphic Violence, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, Implied/Reference, d Suicide, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Overstimulation, Light Bondage, Blow Jobs, Masturbation, Getting Together, Ableist Language, WWX Has ADHD, Autistic LWJ, Queer Themes)

I search myself (I want you to find me) by ilip13 (E, 22k, WangXian, Modern AU, Fluff and Smut, The Porn Is the Plot, Compulsory Heterosexuality, Self-Discovery, Adolescent Sexuality, Slight Gender Feels, Masturbation, Fantasizing, Voyeurism, (sort of), Exhibitionism, (also sort of), Lingerie, Explicit Het Content)

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2. Hi! Do you have any fic recs for fic where wwx come back as someone else other than mxy? I remember seeing one where he ends up as Qin Su @fysmiin

You still sound like a song by Moominmammashandbag (M, 64k, WIP, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Ghost!WWX, Mystery, LWJ plays inquiry, AU from after the Wens came to Lotus Pier, Most people lived, not everybody died, Angst with a Happy Ending, river spirit!WWX, Angst and Feels, description of murder, imminent smut, Execution, Dogs, Poisons, Discussion of Attempted Murder, BAMF WWX, Family Feels)

To Deserve So Much More by renysen (T, 19k, wangxian, getting together, one big happy family, no angst, getting engaged, family feels, female bodied WWX) ofc summons wwx to defend her family's besieged manor.

🔒Femme Fatale by coffeepie (E, 76k, WIP, WWX/WC, WWX/WRH, WWX/WZL, WWX/JGS, Porn, Smut, Possession, Crack Treated Seriously, Humor, Time Travel, Time Travel Fix-It, Penis In Vagina Sex, Anal Sex, Masturbation, Aphrodisiacs, Rough Sex, Minor WangXian, Canon Divergence, Oral Sex, Pre-Sunshot Campaign, Strangulation, Object Insertion, Exhibitionism, Voyeurism, Blood and Injury, Somnophilia, Belly Bulge) WIP. wwx wakes up in wlj's body before the sunshot campaign. cw lots of sex with wc.

the problem with authority by isabilightwood (M, 139k, wangxian, qingli, Canon Divergence, Sacrifice Summon, slightly dark!JYL, wq lives because i said so, Angst with a Happy Ending, Chronic Pain, Mild Sexual Content, Top/Bottom Versatile | Switch WangXian, manipulative relationship (background xiyao)) qs summoning jyl-centric but includes someone else summoning wwx as well

patching the road with vague intentions by loosingletters (T, 39k, WIP, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Humor, Developing Friendships, WWX Resurrected By Others, Trans WWX, Case Fic, POV WWX, POV LQR, Family, Good Uncle LQR, Hurt/Comfort, Golden Core Reveal, Slow Burn, Canon-Typical Violence, MXY Lives) WIP. ofc lwj was arranged to marry after wwx's death summons wwx. lwj hasn't appeared yet.

The Housewife's Guide to Causing Chaos by dvasva (M, 127k, WIP, WangXian, Canon-Typical Violence, Functionally Trans Character, Mild Sexual Content, Domestic Fluff, Love Confessions, Transphobia, Good Parents LWJ and WWX, Pining, WWX is a Tease, Grief/Mourning, Body Dysphoria, Fake Marriage, Canonical Character Death, Misunderstandings, Doting LWJ, Canon Divergence, Arranged Marriage, WWX is not in MXY's body, Misgendering, Mild Angst, Assumptions, Comedic Elements, non-sexual nudity, Blood, Discussion of Various Bodily Functions, Cloud Recesses Shenanigans, 4 years of mourning instead of 13, Méishān Yú Sect, POV Multiple, Corporal Punishment, Trans WWX, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, pregnancy mention, Timeline What Timeline, Sexual Harassment Threats) WIP. ofc lwj was arranged to marry after wwx's death summons wwx. wangxian starts early.

Friends, Sabers, and Other Essentials for Solving a Conspiracy by MeridianGrimm (T, 50k, NHS & WWX, LWJ & NHS, WangXian, Humor, Friendship, Love, Mystery, Canon Divergence, Smart NHS, WWX doesn't stay dead, LWJ gets a new friend, Happy Ending, Fix-It, To be clear the WangXian is mostly background, This fic is about friendship) NHS does a modified summoning

Karma's a Bitch (It's Me, I'm The Bitch) by loosingletters (T, 8k, SS & OC, WWX & OC, Minor Character Death, Canon Divergence, Suicidal Thoughts, Resurrection, Moling Su Sect, Cultivation Sect Politics, Body Dysphoria, WWX is NOT in MXY's Body, Unreliable Narrator, Assassination) Su sect oc summons wwx.

❤️ Beauty and the Boot by PTchan (T, 44k, wangxian, summoned by f!oc, Canon Divergence, Romantic Comedy, Genderbending, Denial, Fem!WWX, WangXian kids, Crack-ish, WIP) seemingly-abandoned WIP. OFC summons wwx.

So You Want to Start a War by JaenysBloodcourt (T, 41k, WIP, MY/QS, MY/WWX, WangXian, Reincarnation, Half-Sibling Incest Mention!, QS does the ritual instead of MXY, WWX as a woman, MY Is His Own Warning, Canon Divergence, Impersonation, Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Please check the notes before reading a chapter, Timeline What Timeline, WWX Has PTSD) WIP. qs summons wwx.

sweet hay and the flowers rising by Shializaro (T, 4k, WangXian, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Mentions of Violence, Alcohol, Humor) qs summons wwx.

Crowded by nirejseki (G, 1k, NHS & WWX, wangxian, LWJ/NHS/WWX, canon divergence, different body offering ritual, atypical relationship dynamics, sentient sabers) NHS does a modified summoning (short fic)

❤️ The Book’s Cover by Eudoxia (E, 50k, wangxian, canon divergence, WWX not in MXY’s body, canon retelling, humor, demisexual LWJ, genderqueer WWX, smut) OFC summons WWX. this is probably my favorite one of all these.

Everyanything by deliciousblizzardshark, lingeringdust (E, 46k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Franken-canon, Gender Identity, Gender Dysphoria, Trans WWX, Protective LWJ, Accidental Baby Acquisition, Canon-Typical Misogyny, Fluff and Angst, Vaginal Sex, Canon-Typical Major Character Death) Qin Su summons WWX.

Chapter 1-23 of The Tales of Despereaux by stiltonbasket (T, 36k, WIP, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Additional Warnings In Author's Note, (when applicable)) Chapters 1-23 are "What if Qin Su summoned Wei Wuxian?" A prologue is linked in the author's note.

Wei Wuxian keeps / gets his OG body / Resurrected by someone other than MXY Comp

Five People Who Never Summoned Wei Wuxian by EHyde (G, 3k, wangxian, Canon Divergence, 5+1 Things, Angst, [Podfic] Five People Who Never Summoned Wei Wuxian by sisi_rambles)

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3. Hey! I have only once asked for a fic before but this is for a Itmf , can you recommend any dark lwj fic? Not just after wwx’s death but lwj protecting wwx or joining him in demonic cultivation, even better if wwx runs yiling wei sect^-^

A Matter of Time series by mrcformoso (E, 84k, wangxian, time travel fix-it, graphic depictions of violence, underage, LWJ pov, JC pov, dark LWJ, manipulation, grooming, teen body adult mind for LWJ, happy ending for wangxian, problematic consensual underage sex, blood & violence, insane LWJ, manic LWJ)

🔒 Flawed and Free by Vrishchika (E, 18k, wangxian, major character death, time travel fix-it, dark LWJ, dark LXC, dark gusu lan, temporary character death, not JC friendly, angst, hurt/comfort, WIP)

🔒 At heart by apathyinreverie (M, 36k, WangXian, WIP, Dark LWJ(Ish), Amnesia, WWX gets to be Not Okay after the BM, Hurt WWX, Recovery, Caring, Protective LWJ, Possessive LWJ, some definite manipulation, but not everything is as it seems, not nearly as dark as the tags make it sound, Canon Divergence, Golden Core Revea, Golden Core Transfer Fix-It, kind of, Domestic WangXian, Fluff, WWX Goes to Gusu, Possessive WWX, WWX happily atticwifing away, Sunshot Campaign, BAMF WWX, BAMF LWJ)

Until The World Embraces Me Home by azri (T, 5k, WIP, WangXian, Canon Divergence, YLLZ LWJ, LWJ Has No Golden Core, Role Reversal, Not LXC Friendly, Not JC Friendly, Not cultivation world friendly overall tbh, Sunshot Campaign, Friends to Lovers, Temporary Character Death, WangXian Get a Happy Ending)

Corrupted Core by The_Gourmet_Gamer (M, 16k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Hurt/Comfort, Golden Core Reveal, Grief/Mourning, Blood and Injury, Character Death, Sad with a Happy Ending, Canon-Typical Violence, Post-First Siege of the Burial Mounds)

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4. Hello 👋

I'm in the mood for Twitter wangxian fic threads,i don't mind it if it's modern or not, but I don't like bottomji or switch wangxian

You might enjoy our Twitter comp

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5. Hello! Thanks for your work. Are there any Wangxian fics set at the Olympics? @chalionkat (previous ask moved to FF - mod C)

Our Sports AU Compilation has a Olympics au section you can check out 😊

and so my heart beats wildly by lily_winterwood (E, 106k, WangXian, JYL/JZX, Modern Cultivation, Rivalry, Competition, Competition-Set Fic, Athletes, Multimedia, Miscommunication, frenemies to lovers, Rivals to Lovers, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, Seemingly One-sided But Actually Mutual Pining, Oblivious WWX, Competitive Cultivation, Anal Sex, First Time, Angst with a Happy Ending, Olympics, Inappropriate use of an Olympic gold medal, Breathplay, Rough Sex, Food Porn, Tanabata, Lily’s back on her Qixi bullshit, Switching, Bottom LWJ) this has cultivation Olympics

🔒 Dance Me to the End by venagrey (E, 35k, WangXian, Modern, Skating, 2021-2022 Figure Skating Season, No Pandemic, teammates to friends to lovers, Eventual Smut, mixed signals: on ice, Oblivious WWX, Bisexual WWX, mortifying ordeal of being known, slightly nonlinear timeline, Unreliable Narrator, gratuitous descriptions of skating, first time nudes, Accidental Phone Sex, WWX is Very Flexible, YOI homage, not actually a crossover, IRL skating homage, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, a little gnc for added zest, inappropriate use of medals, Rimming, Winter Olympics)

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6. Hi! This is for ITMF where WWX is a king maker/advisor/spy master or something like Foot on the brakes, screaming there's a red light by Lookingkindofdumb or Copying Scriptures by chiyukimei

Thank you! @idontknowwhattowriteforusername

🔒 Half Agony, Half Hope by queenklu (T, 105k, WangXian, LXC/JGY, JC/WQ, JYL/JZX, LXC/NMJ, Jane Austen Fusion, persuasion au, Pining, Broken Engagement, Secrets, Espionage, Child Injury, Terrible Parents (YZY & JFM), Past Child Neglect) maybe? Wei Ying was a spy during the war.

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7. Hello!!. i need need need to know if theres any more fics like A Street Kid Named Wuxian where wwx isnt adopted by any sect and just grows up on the strrets/ poor or an orphan @yesibest

A Thousand Things by tickertape (M, 108k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, WWX Isn’t Adopted by the Jiāngs, Developing Friendships, lots of OCs, miscommunication and misunderstandings (they’re idiots your honor), Nightmares, Hurt/Comfort, Panic Attacks, Cloud Recesses Shenanigans, Slow Burn) fits but Wei Ying lived in Yiling until he's around 17 and then gets invited to train with the Lans for a year. It doesn't go into a lot detail about his life on the streets but he is poor throughout his childhood and into his teens.

Ad Oblivione by Baph, HikariNoHimeWriter (M, 70k, WangXian, Time Travel Fix-It, Temporary Character Death, Canon-Typical Violence, POV Multiple, Hurt/Comfort, Grief/Mourning, Identity Reveal, Golden Core Reveal, Cultivation World Critical, Not JC Friendly, Abusive YZY, Angst with a Happy Ending) link in #14 Not sure if this fits as while WWX does grow up on the streets without being adopted into a sect, it's down to time travel, with his soul being sent back to his child body, so he has knowledge of the future & cultivation, so he gets to cheat a little & be more than a normal street kid

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8. Hello, I was wondering if you and the lovely community could help me find selkie-style creature fics? In myth, a selkie is a seal creature who can shed its fur and walk on land as a human. Whoever holds the fur has control over the selkie because they cannot transform back without it. So I am looking for similar themes in WangXian fics! I just read Burn It All Down by nekojita which suggested this would happen with Jiang Cheng holding one of Wei Wuxian’s dragon scales, but the wip hasn’t been updated to finish that portion of the story! So I come to you, looking for more “I control you as long as I hold this part of you captive” stories. Thank you for any recs you can suggest! <3

never love an anchor by tardigradeschool (T, 31k, WangXian, Selkies, No Powers, Historical, Hurt/Comfort, Depression, Pining, Angst, Happy Ending, The Inherent Eroticism of the Sea, PTSD, Presumed Dead, Drowning)

💙 this river runs to you by sundiscus (T, 53k, WangXian, Modern with Magic, Mutual Pining, Dragons, Literal Sleeping Together, Tender wound tending) this might work? It has Dragon!LWJ whose dragon is missing. While no one actually uses it to control him in the story, the possibility that someone could is a major driver of the plot.

Lanterns To Guide You Home by cuttlefeeeeeeeeesh (T, 7k, WangXian, Mutual Pining, Mythology, Selkie AU, Fisherman LWJ, Selkie WWX, Sorta Established Relationship, Fluff, Soft (tm)) might like Lanterns to Guide You Home? It's a bit of a twist on the selkie trope, being less about captivity and more about wangxian reuniting/mutually pining years after being married, but I think it would still appeal to a reader who likes selkie stories. And it's a lovely fic!

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9. Hi! For the ITMF, I was wondering if there are any fics where WWX knows a bit more about MXY when he wakes up in his body? By viewing MXYs memories maybe, or something like that? Just, I want him to be able to act like MXY better and understand his situation better. Is there anything like that? Thanks in advance! @hikato-chan

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10. Hi! This is for ITMF. Is there a fic where WWX tells JYL (or someone else really) that he trust LWJ but not his clan/sect? Thank you! @idontknowwhattowriteforusername

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11. ITMF a fic that takes place during the Cloud Recesses study arc, in the scene where WWX gets LWJ drunk. Something goes different: a kiss? A love confession? A fist fight? @luliaka

Cartwheels In Cloud Recesses Series by ShanaStoryteller (Not Rated, 23k, WangXian, CSSR/WCZ, CSSR and WCZ Live, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, Cloud Recesses Shenanigans)

You Are My Euphoria by orphan_account (M, 17k, wangxian, canon divergence, fluff, making out, 5+1, pining)

it’s just (aah) a little crush (crush!) by sweetlolixo (T, 9k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Romance, Fluff, Pining LWJ, Humor, Courting Rituals, Teen Wangxian)

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12. itmf some concubine wwx, following canon as mich as possible? something along the lines of the concubine mo series by enigmatree

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13. Itmf:

A) some wwx realizing that he's been abused as a child (for example: Madame Yu) and having to accept that actually the adults in his life kind of suck (no Jiang Yanli bashing pls ♡)

B) wwx being raped and his recovery

Thank you 💕

13A)

���💙 Holding shreds by barisan (T, 5k, WangXian, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, No Sunshot Campaign, Body Swap, Not for sexy shenanigans, Chronic Pain, Hurt WWX, Hurt LWJ, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Abusive YZY, Bad Parent YZY, Bad Parent JFM, Good Uncle LQR, Hurt/Comfort, Medical Inaccuracies, POV WWX, Angst with a Happy Ending, Jiāng Family Bashing, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Getting Together, Smart WWX)

🔒 in the shadow of moonlit flowers by Reverie (cl410) (T, 56k, wangxian, LXC/NMJ, Cloud Recesses, LWJ & NHS Friendship, Developing Relationship, POV LWJ, Minor Injuries, Autistic LWJ, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, aka the Madam Yu warning, Genius WWX, Light Angst And Hurt/Comfort, WWX Protection Squad, Gusu Lan Sect, Slow Burn, Protective LWJ, LWJ-centric)

🔒 Warming up (to him) by barisan (T, 9k, LQR & WWX, WangXian, Hypothermia, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, Temporary Character Death, Medical Inaccuracies, YZY Abuses WWX, JFM Bashing, pre-wangxian, Good Uncle LQR, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort)

so i cut the shackles and changed my name by MichelleFeather (T, 9k, WangXian, LQR & LWJ, LQR & CSSR, LQR & WWX, CSSR/WCZ, WWX & The Lan Clan, WIP, WWX Leaves the Yunmeng Jiang Sect, WWX is a Lan, Good Uncle LQR, Supportive LQR, Protective LQR, Non-Graphic Rape/Non-Con, JFM & YZY Bashing, Jiang Family Bashing, Abusive Jiang Family, Running Away, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, Hurt WWX, Genius WWX, No Sunshot Campaign, Gusu Lan Sect Rules, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, Cultivation Sect Politics, Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Canon Divergence, Protective Gusu Lan Sect, WRH isn't a power hungry tyrant, mostly)

Just go forward like you mean it by tawaen (M, 101k, WangXian, WWX & WN &WQ, WWX & JYL, NHS & WWX, Canon Divergence, WWx does not attend the Wen indoctrination, WWX saves Lotus Pier, Inventor WWX, No Golden Core Transfer, Sect Leader JYL, JC Has No Golden Core, Bad Parents JFM & YZY, Not JC Friendly, but he gets a happier ending than canon so don't look here for bashing) WWX gets frustrated with how unconcerned JFM is regarding the Wens & ends up leaving. Features sect leader JYL

Dispersing Clouds by dreamingofcake (E, 283k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Genius WWX, Inventor WWX, Not Jiang Family Friendly, Abusive YZY, Canonical Child Abuse, Hurt/Comfort, Slow Burn, Eventual Sex, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm (Background Character), Background Character Deaths, child deaths, Canon JC, Good Uncle LQR, Accidental Baby Acquisition, Cultivation Sect Politics, Homophobia, Heteronormativity, Feelings Realization, WWX is Not Oblivious) WWX realises he's been poorly treated by the Jiangs & defects. However it could be seen as JYL bashing depending on how you define bashing. She does ignore her family's treatment of WWX & later tries to stop his wedding to LWJ, but she's portrayed as meaning well & just wanting to avoid conflict, & believing she is saving him from a forced marriage. Up to you whether that counts as bashing

13B)

🧡 Heaven Has No Rage by flipfloppandas (M, 51k, WWX & YZY, JFM/YZY,  implied wangxian, WWX/WC, WWX/others, rape/non-con, modern, hurt/comfort, protective YZY, good parent YZY, hospitals, medical procedures, vomiting, trauma) focuses more on the immediate aftermath Wei Ying being raped but does touch on the beginnings of his recovery.

feast and famine by luckymarrow (E, 49k, wangxian, rape/non-con, aftermath of gang rape, modern au, trauma, PTSD, medical procedures, rape recovery, non-consensual drug use, hurt/comfort, angst w/ happy ending, mind all the tags) Rape/recovery and the ripples across the friend group. JYL is the glue that holds everyone together. It's a gut-wrenching, amazeballs fic.

~*~

14. Hii, I'm itmf some good coming of age fanfics!

🔒 Flowers Blooming by Ilona22 (M, 35k, WangXian, Adoption, Prostitution, Family Fluff, Family Drama, Growing Up)

A Life Without Regrets by naqaashi (M, 128k, WIP, WangXian, Time Travel Fix-It, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Crack Treated Seriously, musical cultivation, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, Rogue Cultivator WWX, Murder Husbands, Happy Ending, PTSD, BAMF WWX, Cultivation Sect Politics, Worldbuilding, Módào Zǔshī & The Untamed Combination, No Yīn Iron, Genius WWX, Inventor WWX, Artist WWX, Musician WWX, Bad Parent JFM, Bad Parent YZY, Cultivation Theory, Sentient Burial Mounds, Dysfunctional Family, Grief/Mourning, Parent-Child Relationship, Angry WWX, Angst, No Golden Core Transfer, BAMF LWJ, Idiots in Love)

Ad Oblivione by Baph, HikariNoHimeWriter (M, 70k, WangXian, Time Travel Fix-It, Temporary Character Death, Canon-Typical Violence, POV Multiple, Hurt/Comfort, Grief/Mourning, Identity Reveal, Golden Core Reveal, Cultivation World Critical, Not JC Friendly, Abusive YZY, Angst with a Happy Ending)

🔒 Life is Like a Stranger by through_shadows_falling (T, 69k, wangxian, Kid Fic, Child LWJ, Child WWX, First Meetings, Canon Divergence, Cute Kids, Orphan WWX, Autism Spectrum, Fix-It, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Alternate Canon, POV LWJ, Growing Up Together, WWX raised at Cloud Recesses, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Puberty, Growing Up, Coming Out, teenage angst, Wet Dream, Pining, This fic gets a little raunchier as the kids become teens, But it won’t get too explicit, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers, Spanish Translation, Brief mentions/moments of WWX kissing others in chapter 22 but only on the cheek, also characters kiss WWX on the cheek in chapter 23, but his real first kiss is with LWJ, Перевод на русский | Translation in Russian)

~*~

15. Hey!!

So i was wondering if there are any fics where wangxian have a cute little couple’s argument..they make up in the end obv, i don’t really prefer heavy angst. Just a normal couple’s argument. @honestlyewww

tipping point by cherrywhiskey (M, 13k, WangXian, Established Relationship, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Married Couple, Married Life, Bickering, Idiots in Love, Fluff and Angst, Humor, Fights, Arguing, Making Up, Angry Kissing, Making Out, Modern AU, POV Alternating, Fighting)

you became my husband when i first laid my eyes on you by bunnylan (weiyingpretty) (G, 2k, WangXian, Modern AU, Modern Era, Fluff, Boyfriends, Cute, Tik Tok Challenge, Husbands, Established Relationship)

~*~

16. IMTF wangxian or any one of the two as (a) lawyers (b) teachers trying to hide their relationship from students (c) scientists (biologist, physicist, etc.) any kind

Thank you <3

16A)

🔒 a thousand fragile and unprovable things by theLoyalRoyalGuard (G, 5k, WangXian, Modern AU, Trans Male Character, Trans MXY, MXY Deserves Happiness, Best Dads Wangxian, Handwaving The Legal System With The Power of LWJ, A little bit of angst, mostly soft, Happy Ending, Gender Happiness, Let LWJ Wear Skirts Agenda, Additional Warnings In Author’s Note) Lan Wangji is a lawyer

Close to the Truth by Winglesss (M, 14k, WangXian, Modern AU, Christmas Fluff, Christmas Party, Ugly Holiday Sweaters, Romantic Comedy, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Homophobia, Tooth-Rotting Fluff) Lan Wangji is a lawyer

Scapegoat by Anonymous (E, 216k, WIP, WangXian, Modern AU, Trials, Lawyer LWJ, Defendant WWX, Courtroom Drama, False Accusations, Criminal Investigation, Threats of Violence, Hurt WWX, Protective LWJ, Childhood Trauma, Murder Mystery, Pining, Soft WangXian, Slow Burn, Domestic Bliss, Happy Ending, Found Family, Bad Parent YZY, neutral jc, Good Sibling JYL, neutral lxc, Bad Uncle LQR, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, POV Alternating, Top LWJ/Bottom WWX, Pining while fucking, Belly Bulge, Gentle Sex, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Neck Kissing, Eventual Smut, porn in chapter 15, Praise Kink, Homophobia, chapter specific TWs will be in top notes, Power Play, Power Imbalance, Wet Dream)

16C)

🔒 at first sight of the sun by sunflowersfield (T, 3k, WangXian, Modern, Coworkers, Fluff, Neurodiversity, Falling In Love, Getting Together, Happy Ending, First Dates, First Kiss, Hurt/Comfort) Lan Wangji is a researcher at a forest preserve in at first sight of the sun

A Cyborg’s Three Laws by @joshua-beeking, FairyGardenCorgis (M, 194k, WangXian, Future, Cyborgs, Science Fiction, Science Boyfriends, Romance, Slow Burn, Medical Procedures, Surgery, Angst, Fluff, Humor, Eventual Smut, Hurt/Comfort, LWJ has RA, Idiot Friends to Idiot Lovers, Medical Assault, Dehumanization, obscene amounts of cuddling, Versatile wangxian)

~*~

17. Hi! I meant to ask this, but I think I haven't yet (it would already be posted otherwise). For the ITMF, are there any fics where WWX, post canon, gets transported timewise into the 13/16 years he was dead? Preferably only for a bit until he figures out how to get back, and while hiding his identity. Thanks for the help! @hikato-chan

Less Than Two Years by wenqing (maniafic) (T, 5k, WangXian, Time Travel, Post-Canon, but also canon divergent, in an alternate universe though, Minor Angst, mostly wwx confusing the kids)

~*~

If you didn’t get an answer to your ask here, don’t forget to make use of @mdzs-kinkmeme and MDZS KINK MEME on Dreamwidth. Authors actually do use them for ideas. You may get what you order!***Your prompt doesn’t have to be kink! Fluff, crack, whatever - it’s all good!***

[kiaradaughterofselene]

Open starter

(Slight cw for a brief mention of transphobia and being misgendered in the past.)

Kiara is sitting quietly in the Aphrodite cabin, letting some of the campers basically give her a makeover. She had just been brought back from being captured while on a quest, and she was rough. She knew this would help her both physically and mentally. Physically, because she would be getting to relax and clean up a bit. Mentally, because this would help her feel better about herself. Her captors had insisted she was a boy no matter how many times she said she wasn't.

(Ooc: you can either be one of the Aphrodite campers or someone else idc)

@the-gods-abandoned-us

@arisdaughter

@mache-of-greece

@demigod-jack-hearth

@kaiaalwayswins

@unhinged-waterlilly

@daredevil-shit

@southerndaughterofeos

@glykera

@son-of-the-moonlight

@yourlocalfallenstar

@luci-likes-dinoss

@elixs-mythology-corner

@bast-the-best26

@emdabitchass

@if-chaos-was-a-boy

@luck-is-crucial

@love-lightning-forethought

@the-prince-telemachus

@pink-koi-lovejoy

@fire-boy-official

@apollos-favorite-child

@ariathemortal

@cass-sees-the-future

@reyna4ever

lmk if you wanna be added or removed

[willows-pjo-ocs]

Open Starter

(Slight cw for a brief mention of transphobia and being misgendered in the past.)

Kiara is sitting quietly in the Aphrodite cabin, letting some of the campers basically give her a makeover. She had just been brought back from being captured while on a quest, and she was rough. She knew this would help her both physically and mentally. Physically, because she would be getting to relax and clean up a bit. Mentally, because this would help her feel better about herself. Her captors had insisted she was a boy no matter how many times she said she wasn't.

(Ooc: you can either be one of the Aphrodite campers or someone else idc)

@the-gods-abandoned-us @demigod-jack-hearth @kaiaalwayswins

[lynnarang]

First Contact

Love at first sight is always bloody.

CW// transphobia

First time writing something in awhile, went a little longer than expected.

---------------------------------------------

“Look at him squirming, what a freak.”

These words, followed by a few mouthfuls of slurs, broke the wolfgirl from her stupor. It wasn’t unusual for her to dissociate a little while on public transit, crowds had never been good for her, but today something demanded attention from her and just about every other passenger on the train car. A group of four young men, probably frat boys based on the look of them, were crowded around a single passenger, jeering and laughing.

It didn’t take long to figure out what was going on. The unfortunate victim they were gathered around was a blonde woman in a simple sweater and skirt, her vibrant red eyes desperately examining the wall as if it would drive away her harassers. The wolf had noticed her when first stepping on the train, a cute little thing sinking into the corner of her seat as if she wanted to be invisible. Sadly for her, it hadn’t done her any good.

“You’re not fooling anyone bro.” “Bet that bra is fucking padded too.” “Bet he gets off putting it on.” Alright, that was enough. Normally she made a point of not involving herself in other’s business but the poor girl they were tormenting looked like she was going to implode at any moment. The wolf stood up, stretching out her limbs. Luckily transit was light today, and what few people were nearby had already shuffled over to further away seats, if not to escape the conflict then to escape the booze the small crowd reeked of. As she approached them, the automated announcer declared the approach of the next stop. “Hey.” The wolf chimed in with a hand on the shoulder of the man at the back of the group, barely holding herself back from crushing his clavicle. Her interruption only drew his attention, but that was enough for her. “What? You got a probl–”

His sentence was interrupted by the sudden impact of her fist caving in his cheek, sending him reeling into one of his friends.This yanked the spotlight over to the wolf, and as her first target let out a surprised half-choked squeal, the other three all looked at the sudden intruder on their fun with mixtures of anger and surprise. She could tell by watching their faces that it took a few moments before what had just happened to process fully, but she let them have those moments.

It was the one she assumed was the leader of the bunch who finally spoke up, his mocking laughter transformed into rage.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Behind him, the terrified blonde briefly locked eyes with her apparent savior, her wide eyes seemingly asking why the wolf had jumped to her rescue. She answered both these questions at once, with a slight shrug of her shoulders. “I just needed to blow off some steam and a few punching bags threw themselves in my way, that’s all.” They obviously didn’t like this answer because in the next few seconds all three men left standing rushed at her at once.

The scrap was messy, brutal, and finished just as the train doors for the next stop opened up. She’d punched one of the guys in the gut just as he hit her face, kneed another in the stomach as he tried to tackle her, and finished off by headbutting the leader when he tried to grab her arms. The end result was a group of men scattered around the train car, a few groaning in pain while one cried loudly about how his parents were going to sue for this. But she barely paid attention to any of them, the thrill of sudden combat still coursing through her veins. The wolf was left with a few obvious bruises from where she’d been hit, a stream of blood running down her nose, and a headache barely pounding louder than her adrenaline.

Without a word, she took a few victorious strides past the crowd waiting to board and onto the train platform, flipping off the confused security guard who came to yell at her but was too scared to actually approach her. It was only when she’d made her way out of the station and the adrenaline started to wear off that she heard the voice calling out to her. “H-Hey! Wait up!” For a brief moment she thought one of the guys she just beat up had shown up for round two, but when she turned around the one running towards her was the blonde from the train. The wolf stopped, letting the woman catch up. She didn’t even catch her breath before heaving out what she wanted to say. “I... Wanted to thank you… I-I wasn’t sure… what to do... and…” “You don’t have to thank me, I really was just relieving my own stress.” “B-But you saved me! Regardless of your motivations, you still saved me! How could your actions not be just?!” The way the woman talked so enthusiastically and the way her eyes sparkled when she looked up at her made the wolf unsteady, unsure how to react to such praise. “Look lady, it really wasn’t anything… They probably would have gotten bored of bothering you anyway…” “But even then! I was touched! N-Not in the sense that like, anyone touched me, but like my feelings were! Please, won’t you at least tell me your name so I can thank you properly?”

For a brief moment, the wolf considered the possibility that this was all an elaborate scheme and she was gonna get sued for a million dollars for breaking some rich kids face if she gave her name here, but one look at the earnest face of the excitable damsel scrubbed the thought from existence. “...Arang. My name is Arang.”

The blonde’s eyes lit up and she clasped her hands. “Arang! Thank you Arang! My name is Sephina. It’s been really nice to… meet you…” Sephina’s voice trailed off as she looked around. Somehow, Arang already knew what she was about to say next. “Oh… I uh… Where are we exactly? I think I got off on the wrong stop… ehe…”

Arang felt like she was being dragged through a hurricane with the speed this woman shifted moods. “...We’re just south of the harbor.” “How far is that from downtown, exactly..?” “About a forty minute walk. And yes, that was the last train for the night.” The color drained from Sephina’s face as the weight of her mistake dawned on her. She looked utterly pathetic in a way that Arang couldn’t help but find cute, like a kitten that kept trying to make a jump that was too big for it. “..Do you want me to walk you home?” Like someone had just hit rewind, Sephina immediately lit back up. “Would you? I-I wouldn’t want to impose…” “I live that way anyway, it’s not a big deal.” “Then… Yes! I would love to walk with you Arang!”

Sephina beamed, using the wolf’s name again eagerly. There was something about the way she said it that made Arang’s heart feel like it was floating… She wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or not but she decided that for now she liked it. “I’ll lead the way then. You can tell me when you start to recognize buildings so we know we’re close to your place.”

 Sephina nodded energetically but then froze to ponder something. “But wait, if you live this way too, doesn’t that mean you also got off on the wrong st-” “Finish that sentence and you’re walking home alone.”

Arang would never forget the way the heat rushing to her cheeks felt as Sephina laughed at her in that moment.

[isolatecraftcornau]

Hello my little artists!!

I'm Craftycorn!! this app has a lot of art and i've even people who.. look like my friends.. here so i thought i would hang around!

I use she/they pronouns !

Anon magic: n/a Lasts for: 0 asks

(I count down for anon magic)

Nicknames given to isolated crafty : Crystal, Gemstone, Jewel

Death count : 3

Mlp plushie count : 2

Please be respectful, homophobia, transphobia, racism and any other stereotyping or disrespect will not be acceptable. These messages will not be responded to.

-

Crafty talking!

Cirro talking - @memoriesoncelost

*Narrator talking

*actions*

lore post

cw: general violence, there's an arson anon, hoj trauma, hallucinations

mod and au info aswell as a list of ask given injury below

In this au blog we follow a crafty corn who instead of going crazy for "red paint" during the hour of joy, isolated herself. They isolated themself in the toy store, rearranging it many times in a lonely craze. It's a bit dark but she has plenty of art supplies..

you have permission to torment this crafty and even kill her

Now mod info, I go by Painter, I use he/they pronouns and will talk like [this] or (this) when out of character, i am happy to answer questions!! This is my mod blog @painterthemod

as stated hate of any sort will not be tolerated.

-

Injuries/scars

Burnt hooves: completely healed!!

slight burns to face

burns to whole body, but so i don't have to rewrite her whole design im keeping the burn scars to her limbs

litterally ripped apart! Scaring along hips shoulders and sides

flattened like a pancake, her joints are a bit stiffer.

[bamber344]

Till Death Did Us Part (Madeline intro)

prev/next

masterlist

Chapter takes place concurrently with the previous chapter; Jordyn's Deployment

New character POV time! Like I said in the prologue, Jordyn's POV is the only one in first person; the rest of them are in third limited. Hopefully it's not too confusing!

Heed the warnings on this one! No physical whump, but this babe ain't doing too hot (she's where the 'sad women' bit on the masterlist description comes from) and the chapter touches on some of the darker parts of her mental state. Nothing extremely explicit, but it might be triggering for some so I wanted to make sure. Stay safe! Chapter begins below the cut.

CWs: frequent references to pre-canon character death, mentions of alcoholism, slight allusions to self-harm, suicidal ideation, mentions of transphobia (misgendering). I think that's it, but let me know if I forgot anything!

Till Death Did Us Part

The sound of her phone buzzing on her nightstand forced Madeline out of a sleep she desperately didn’t want to wake from. She didn’t want to greet the day that awaited her; perfectly content to just lay there, hiding under her covers until the calendar ticked over to the next date along. She didn’t want to face the realities that today would force upon her. If she just closed her eyes and drowned everything out, she could pretend none of the past five years ever happened; that Rosie was just in the bathroom, and would come back to bed at any moment.

Her phone rang again, and Madeline grumbled, reaching over to answer it.

“Leave me alone, Viv,” she muttered hoarsely into the receiver.

“Damn, someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed today, huh?” Vivienne replied. 

Anger flared in Madeline’s gut. “Don’t fucking poke me today, Vivienne. Not today.”

There was a silence over the phone. “I… I’m sorry, you’re absolutely right. That was mean. I was just… trying to lighten the mood, I guess. Sorry.”

Madeline sighed. “What do you want?”

“I was just checking up. I know today’s difficult for you. Want me to come over? I can make breakfast.”

Breakfast meant getting out of bed. It meant waking up and coming face to face with the truth of the day. It also meant scrambled eggs with bits of ham and cherry tomatoes. A difficult choice, to be sure. 

At the continued silence of Madeline’s internal debate, Viv dug deeper. “Come on, you know Rosie wouldn’t want you to rot in bed all day.”

All the assumption did was stoke the fire inside of her. “Don’t presume to know what she would want.”

“You know I’m right, though. Come on, you won’t even have to do anything. I’ll even do the dishes after. Please?”

The thing that sucked was that she was right. The last thing Rosie would want would be for Madeline to waste her life mourning her. She groaned loudly, making sure that Vivienne could hear her dissatisfaction. 

“Fine.”

Immediately, Vivienne appeared at the side of Madeline’s bed. She was used to the sudden teleportation by now, but it still annoyed her how quickly she showed up. She wanted at least a little more time to pretend she didn’t exist before being forced to interact with anyone.

“Come on, snowball. Up you get.”

Madeline groaned again, burying her face in the pillow. “Get out of my room.”

“Say please.”

Madeline grabbed a spare pillow and hucked it at Vivienne, who teleported to the other side of the room and pulled the covers off of the bed in retaliation.

“Oh my god, you’re naked!”

“Karma,” Madeline muttered, a smile tugging at her lips. She would never admit it, but Viv’s antics were a little amusing.

“Fine, I’ll give you a few minutes!” Viv called, now on the other side of the bedroom door. “Don’t take too long, though. Breakfast will be ready soon!”

Madeline sighed, sinking back into the pillow to enjoy her last few moments of restful bliss.

—

“So, what are your plans for today?”

Madeline shrugged, running a hand through her dirty-blonde mullet and pulling the tangles out of it. It had been an impulse choice of haircut made in a half-drunken, half-miserable stupor, but she would be lying if she said she hated it. It added to her butchy vibe. “I dunno. Visit Rosie’s grave, I suppose. Cry a lot. Drink myself to sleep again.”

Vivienne frowned. “Come on, Maddie. you agreed to stop doing that.”

“What are you, my mom?”

“No, I actually care about your wellbeing.”

Madeline snorted. “You’ve got me there.”

They were sitting at the kitchen counter, finishing the scrambled eggs Viv had made. By now, Madeline was well and truly awake, and that really sucked. But, time waited for no woman, and today would have happened, whether she got out of bed or not. Today was the five-year anniversary of Rosalyn Garcia-Holmes’ death, and sleeping in wouldn’t change that. It would just protect Madeline’s consciousness from having to recognise that she’d been a widow for five years for just a few hours longer. Kicked out of home at 14, married to her childhood best friend at 18, widowed by a monster attack at 21, semi-recovering alcoholic and washed up superhero at 26. What a shit-crock of a life.

Okay, maybe ‘washed up’ was being a little harsh on herself. As far as superheroes went, she was respected for her work. Though she was currently on indefinite hiatus for mental health reasons, she was technically the co-leader of the Heroes Union, and the other heroes did value her opinions, whenever she was present to give them. The problem was that she wasn’t really doing anything else with her life. Vigilantism was generally looked down upon, and would get heroes arrested if they tried to do it with any degree of frequency, given their solid lack of secret identities. They were allowed to step in in the case of violent crime, but they had no real power to arrest, just protect. Most hero work was just fighting off monster attacks and helping rescue civilians in the aftermath of any disasters, which left them with a lot of free time. Of course, there were the occasional villains that showed up, using their powers for their own gain and too dangerous for the police to go near, but in a city like Tombguard, with all of its heroes, most would-be villains had the good sense to try their luck elsewhere.

All that was to say; Madeline didn’t have a job. ‘Freeloader’ was a common pejorative used for superheroes by people who didn’t like that their taxes supported the Union, but in her case, they were right. She spent all of her time moping around, occasionally doing some work when the Godling decided to make another lamppost sentient or whatever - and then spent all of her leftover Union paycheck (after rent and food and other basic necessities) on alcohol and weed. In an ideal world, she would actually be contributing something to society; working a job, and then popping out to kick some flesh-and-stone creature’s butt when the city needed her, but she just… Wasn’t Doing That. At the very least, she could take a more active role in her hero work; go on patrols, monitor the city, help little old ladies cross the street. Do some actual volunteer work if she couldn’t find a paying job. Life was just a mess at the moment, and though she felt like she was slowly getting better, she still really just missed her wife, and it was exceedingly hard to move past that grief. Especially on days like today.

Viv put a hand on her shoulder, snapping her out of her thoughts. “You know what we should do? Go on patrol.”

Madeline raised an eyebrow. “Why?”

“Because I’m pretty sure you haven’t left the house in a week. Come on, it’ll be fun! We’ll get some sunlight, do some parkour, feel the wind rushing through our hair!” Her voice lowered from its jubilance, becoming quieter; more sympathetic. “Once we’ve had enough we can stop by to see Rosie, alright?”

Madeline looked her in the eye, trying to see through her milk-chocolate irises to the intention underneath. “Why do you care so much about me? Why go out of your way for me like this? I don’t get it.”

The question gave Vivienne pause. She sighed, reaching up and putting her hand on the top of Madeline’s head.

“Because you’re my friend, you numbskull.” She ruffled Madeline’s hair. “I’m not just gonna drop you because you’re having a hard time. I care about you, and I’m not gonna stop caring when it becomes difficult. You were always there for me when I joined the Union, even through my worst days. Now, it’s my turn to do the same for you. Everyone needs a little helping hand sometimes.”

Madeline looked down at her empty plate, tears threatening to form in her eyes. “I… Thanks, Viv. I’m really glad to have you as a friend, even if… I don’t always act like it.”

“Likewise,” Viv replied, playfully punching her shoulder. “Now, suit up! Let’s go!”

Madeline raised an arm and sniff-checked her armpit. “Yeah, that’s not happening until I shower.”

—

Alright, Madeline could admit when she’d been wrong. Being out in the sun was pretty damn nice. It was a beautiful day, and putting her costume on for the first time in weeks felt great, even if it didn’t fit quite as well as it used to on account of the muscle she’d lost lazing around. The wind tousled her hair as she ran and leaped from building to building, her arms and legs singing with exertion and endorphins, heart racing in her chest. She felt alive. A laugh bubbled up from deep within her as she summoned a platform of ice beneath her feet, using it to launch herself up to a higher ledge and vault over, landing in a roll on the next roof.

“Woohoo!” Viv called as she did a backflip off the next ledge, only to miss the landing and fall in between the buildings. She reappeared back on the roof and laughed. “Oops, messed that one up.”

Madeline shook her head fondly. “Teleportation has made you far too reckless.”

Viv wiggled her hips, poking out her butt. “Hey, if you got it, you gotta flaunt it.”

Madeline raised an eyebrow. “Are you sure you’ve ‘got it’? Because the only thing I see is a flat washboard.”

Viv blew a raspberry, flipping her off. “My ass is great and you know it.”

Madeline chuckled. “Sure. I-”

“Hey, stop! Thief!”

The shout caught both of their attention. They shared a look and walked to the edge of the roof, peering over the street, where a man was running in their direction, groceries clutched in his arms.

“Shoplifter,” Madeline observed. “None of our business.” It would be hypocritical of her to go after him, anyway; she’d had no qualms stealing food to feed herself in the past. She understood the plight.

“Man’s gotta eat,” Vivienne said. 

Madeline had seen all she needed to see. They were about to turn away when another commotion set off near the intersection. A figure in black leapt from the passenger door of a car and sped down the sidewalk towards the man, moving faster than a regular human had any right to. Their black armour glinted in the sunlight as they crashed into him, tackling him to the ground and pinning his arms behind his back.

“Who the hell is that?” Viv asked.

Madeline shrugged. “I dunno. Their armour looks pretty expensive, though.”

An older man walked up, hands behind his back. Viv groaned. “Ew, I hate that jerk.”

Andreas de Vygon was a loud and proud anti-unionist and a staunch hater of superheroes of all types. Also, a police captain with a history of unsavoury allegations, all covered up by his rich friends. ‘Jerk’ was putting it kindly, in Madeline’s experience. Though, from the way he was acting around this new person, perhaps ‘hypocrite’ would be a better adjective.

“Backup is on the way to take him to the station. Good work, Seven.”

“Thank you, sir.”

Something about their voice - even muddied by an obvious voice changer as it was - stuck in Madeline’s brain. She couldn’t tell what it was, but something about the way they spoke was familiar. It wasn’t the accent – that was as nondescript as an accent could be, as far as she could tell. It was just… something.

“Well, shit. A superhero working with the police. That’s a new one,” Viv said.

“Mhm.”

“Wanna go down there and meet them? See what they’re about?”

Madeline thought about it. This new person was intriguing, but not enough to risk having to deal with de Vygon’s bullshit. They were probably just a cop sympathiser who got lucky enough to be born with powers, anyway. Going by their armour, they were clearly sponsored, too. Not worth the trouble.

“Nah. Andreas de Bigot would probably just aggressively misgender me again.”

Viv snorted. “Yeah, true.”

Madeline was referencing a press release the man had done, addressing the public a few days after Rosie’s death. He’d referred to Madeline multiple times as Rosie’s ‘husband,’ despite the fact that she was very publicly a woman, including on her ID, and had already been years deep into her transition when she made her debut on the city stage. She couldn’t imagine his views had changed much in the intervening years.

“Come on, let’s get out of here.”

They took a more casual pace as they continued, hopping between buildings where possible and teleporting where it wasn’t. The sight of the scene below them had sobered Madeline up some. She couldn’t count how many nights she’d spent in a holding cell during her teen years after getting caught pocketing things from corner stores. Sometimes she would get lucky and just get beaten to a pulp by the owner in the alley outside, but most of the time the cops would be called, and her ice powers weren’t nearly refined enough back then to help her get away. She’d be more likely to slip and skin her knee. It was a dark time for her before Rosie’s family took her in. She felt for the poor guy who just got caught.

They’d been making their way along for a good few minutes when a loud crash sounded behind them. Madeline didn’t even have to turn to know that the Godling was up to Its bullshit again.

“Sorry, Snowball. Looks like you’ll actually have to do your job today.”

“Lay off it, Viv,” she sighed. Sure enough, when she turned, a giant glob of pinkish flesh had risen from the road, and was very angry at the world. That was definitely going to mess up traffic for the next few days. Oh well, it didn’t look that tough. Time to actually do her job, and just maybe get a little catharsis out of it. For Rosie.

Vivienne grabbed her hand and they jumped into the fray.

—

“Well, that was easy.”

“Yup.” 

Madeline stared at the mess she’d just made of the monster; riddled with holes from the giant ice spears she’d thrown at it. Generating that much ice from the air always took a lot of effort, so she’d worked up a decent sweat, but the melting point was also a lot lower, so it’d clear itself out quickly. Her job as a Union frontliner was done; now it was the cleanup crew’s turn.

“Thanks for the assist,” she said, turning to Vivienne. “That would have been a lot harder if I had to focus on dodging too.”

“That’s what I’m here for!” Viv beamed.

“So, what now?”

Vivienne looked back towards the scene with the cop-hero. Madeline followed her gaze. They were still there, looking in this direction.

“Oh, there’s my uncle!”

“The detective?”

“Yeah. I know you don’t like cops, and, okay, you have good reason not to, but trust me, he’s a decent guy. Mostly a desk jockey these days.”

“I don’t really care,” Madeline muttered, truly apathetic about the whole thing. She’d met the guy a handful of times on patrols, and there was no reason to doubt Viv’s take on him. From what she could tell, he was just a guy stuck in his job because he’d already wasted too much of his life doing it, now only doing the bare minimum to get by so he wouldn’t lose his only source of income. Honestly, he just seemed kinda sad most of the time. In the lonely, alcoholic sort of way. Hm, on second thought, maybe they’d get along.

“Wanna go say hi?”

“Not really-”

She didn’t even have time to get the words out before Viv was reaching for her.

“-DON’T fucking teleport me.” She flinched away.

Viv got that fucking look on her face that she always got whenever there was a line she knew she could push without getting in too much trouble. A sinking feeling spread through Madeline’s gut and she internally resigned herself to her fate of having to speak to a cop.

Sure enough, the little shit disappeared and Madeline felt a hand on her back. A split second later her ears popped and she found herself only a few feet away from the group of pigs and their little superhero helper. Just great.

“Fuck! I told you not to do that, Viv!”

She put her hands up in surrender – but notably did not apologise. Madeline was going to remember that, and she was going to hold it against her so hard. 

“Hey, Uncle Steve!”

The unkempt man cleared his throat. “Good morning, Vivienne. Nice work out there. You too, Madeline.”

Madeline grunted in acknowledgement. She could feel eyes on her from under that rent-a-cop’s faceless black visor. Studying her. Intensely. It was uncomfortable.

They were surprisingly short up close. Granted, Madeline was decently tall, coming in at 6 feet, so a lot of people were surprisingly short to her. Especially those with the aura that this over-armoured supersoldier had. They looked wound up like a coiled spring, ready to jump out and strike the moment the order came through. Still… there was something there, gnawing at the back of her mind. The armour was pretty form fitting, and something about their shape just… Well, to be honest, it reminded her of Rosie. Not that Rosie had a monopoly on her particular body shape. She was just on Madeline’s mind a lot, on account of what day it was. It wasn’t important, she concluded. Just her mind grasping at its usual straws.

“Thanks!” Viv replied. She turned to the Rosie shapematch. “So, a new hero, huh? What’s your name?”

Andreas stepped in before they had a chance to respond, putting a possessive hand on their shoulder. “We’re done here, Seven.”

Just like that, they were led away back to the car they came from; now sitting lonely near the intersection. All other traffic had cleared off in the wake of the monster attack.

“Well,” Madeline said. “That was really fuckin’ strange.”

“That’s an understatement,” Steve said. “We were only informed about this yesterday. They’re calling it Project Genesis, whatever that means. Super confidential stuff, apparently. I never thought a hero would actually be allowed to work within our ranks.”

“Who are they?” Viv asked.

Steve shrugged. “De Vygon only ever referred to them as ‘Seven’. I don’t think I caught a gender or anything. Though… when that monster popped up, they seemed afraid of it. Could be something. I think I also heard the captain mention memory loss to them, too. Maybe they're amnesiac?”

“That sounds wildly unethical,” Madeline muttered under her breath. An amnesiac superhero, hiding their face, with a number for a name, who’s afraid of monsters, working under an almost-definitely corrupt police captain. Everything about this was screaming ‘red flag.’

“Should we ask them to join the Union?” Viv pondered. “All of the heroes in Tombguard have to be part of it, don’t they?”

Madeline sighed, pulling out the tome of job-knowledge in her head. “Legally, they don’t have to join if they don’t want to, so long as they’re independently licensed. From the looks of things, I’d say they probably are. Extend an invitation if you really want, I don’t care either way.” 

Things would probably be safer if the supercop was under the same regulations as the rest of the Union, but she didn’t say that out loud. Honestly, they gave her the creeps. She’d rather stay away where possible.

Steve stretched, cracking his back. “Well, I’d better get going. Gotta get this guy processed. You two take care.”

Madeline didn’t acknowledge him as he got in the car and drove off. That whole interaction had put her in a bit of an odd mood. She didn’t really feel like patrolling anymore.

Viv picked up on it. “You had enough?”

She nodded. “Yeah. Take me home.”

—

Madeline clutched the bouquet of flowers as she made her way through the rows of graves, her chest aching. Vivienne hadn’t accompanied her into the cemetery proper, just dropping her off at the gates and letting her go on her own. She appreciated it. As much as she cared for the girl, she wanted to spend some alone time with Rosie today. Though, it seemed as though her wish wouldn’t be granted; at least, not yet.

Standing at Rosie’s grave were two people; a man and a woman, holding each other as they looked at the headstone. Manny and Eleanor Garcia. Rosie’s parents. Madeline sucked in a breath and approached.

Manny was the first one to notice her presence. He turned to her, a sad smile adorning his face. “Madeline. It’s good to see you.”

“Hey,” she replied, voice rough. “Likewise.”

“We’ve missed you this past year,” Eleanor said.

Madeline hummed. It was the truth; she’d been neglecting paying them a visit lately. They were better parents to her than her bio-parents had ever been, and she loved them dearly. Honestly, she owed them her life. It was just… difficult being in that house without Rosie around. Living was difficult without Rosie around, to be fair, but she was trying to work past that. With the recent dip in her mental health, it was just easier to avoid anything that reminded her too strongly of her late wife, in-laws' house included.

Upon realising that she clearly wasn’t going to get a response, Eleanor changed the subject. “I like what you’ve done with your hair.”

Madeline managed a smile, running a hand through her mullet. “Thanks. It was… mostly an accident, but I like it, too.”

Awkward silence stretched between them. The wind rustled through the trees, birds chirping and singing like this wasn’t the anniversary of the worst day in the world. Madeline looked at her in-laws, analysing their features and searching for any sign of Rosie. There were hints of her, here and there; in Eleanor’s thick, wavy hair, and the shape of her eyes; in Manny’s wide nose and tan skin. She had her dad’s laugh lines and her mom’s fierce personality. It was a small comfort; being able to see parts of her, still alive and moving, not buried six feet beneath the dirt.

Manny sighed and put an arm out towards her. “Enough of this, Maddie. We’re not strangers. Come here.”

Madeline wasn’t strong enough to resist the pull. She stepped into his hold, sinking against his side as his arm wrapped around her shoulders. Tears prickled at her eyes. “I’m sorry I haven’t been there recently. I miss you guys.”

“You know you’re always welcome to stay with us,” Eleanor said. “You’re family. Just as much our daughter as Rosalyn was.”

Madeline bit her lip, trying not to cry too hard. “Th-thank you. Things… Things have been really difficult lately. Just getting out of bed is hard most days. I don’t really have the energy to spare for anything but surviving. That’s… That’s why I’ve been vacant.”

Manny kissed her head. “We’ll always look after you, cariño. If you need help, we’ll be there.”

Madeline smiled. “I’ll think about it. Thank you both.”

The silence that came over them was far more amicable this time around. Madeline stared at Rosie’s gravestone, thinking about how her wife was just underneath her, only six feet away. She was so close, yet Madeline would never truly get to see her face again, cursed to forever catch fleeting, teasing glimpses of her in picture frames and lookalikes. Her body yearned for Rosie’s, whole and real and alive; not just a frozen, flat image of a painted expression. What she wouldn’t give for just one more night with her…

“Hard to believe it’s already been five years,” she muttered, bottom lip quivering a little. 

Hold it back, Madeline. At least until Rosie’s parents leave. Don’t let them see how broken you still are.

Manny hummed. “Some mornings I still expect to hear her running downstairs into the kitchen.”

“I still think she’s gonna be next to me when I wake up,” she admitted.

“Sometimes I hear noises at night, and my first instinct is still that it’s you two staying up late again,” Eleanor said, voice breaking a little.

For some reason, that was what broke her. Her fragile hold snapped and a sob tore from her throat, and from there it was hopeless. Manny’s arms cradled her and she buried her face in his coat, shoulders bouncing as she bawled. Another pair of arms encircled her, comforting in their warmth. It didn’t quell the hurt, though. It didn’t fill the hole left in her heart.

Why was this still so painful? Wasn’t time supposed to make it better? It had been five damn years, and Madeline was sick of feeling so miserable, but every time she seemed to be healing, something would remind her and she would tumble all the way back down again. After the first year, she’d been doing good; working, participating in the Union, just keeping busy to distract herself. Yes, she had some unsavoury coping mechanisms at the time, but she was functioning, and she was functioning for a while. About a year and a few months ago, though, her mental health took a dive and she’d been an absolute wreck ever since. It was like the first few months after Rosie’s death all over again, only it just never ended. It wasn’t fair. She’d been coping. She’d been getting on with her life. Moving on, like Rosie would want her to. Now, she was just back in a pit, and every time she tried to climb out, the walls would crumble under her fingers and she’d fall back down. It just… felt so hopeless. Some days, she just wanted to lie in that pit and let the dirt bury her for good, so she could be with Rosie again. The thought was far more tempting than it should’ve been.

She pulled back from Manny, wiping her eyes. “Thanks…”

He ruffled her hair affectionately. “Anytime, mija. We’ll give you some space with her. After that, would you like to come over for dinner?”

She nodded, unable to form the words to properly reply. The two of them smiled softly, before turning and leaving her alone at the grave.

Madeline turned back towards the sun-warmed stone, reading the words engraved on it.

Rosalyn Garcia-Holmes

Beloved daughter and wife. Activist and Hero. Firestarter.

Gave her life for the people of Tombguard.

“Screw Billy Joel, I started it.”

Madeline smiled sadly at the quote, remembering the day Rosie said it. She kneeled on the grass, placing the bouquet down next to the headstone.

“Hey, Rosie. I’ve been missing you a lot, lately. I, um… I hope you’re sleeping well.”

Madeline didn’t really know what to say. She had so many thoughts in her head regarding Rosie, but now that she wanted to say them out loud, nothing came to her. Maybe it was for the best. Rosie would understand, either way. Madeline didn’t want to disturb her rest with pointless ramblings. She took a deep breath, trying to reorganise her thoughts, and spoke again, reaching out to touch the headstone.

“I… I love you. So, so much. I still miss you every single day. I hope you’re well, wherever you are. I hope… I hope I’ll get to see you there someday, too. I… Fuck, Rosie. I can’t even put it into words. I just… I just wish you were here right now. I wish I could hold you again. I wish I could hear your voice from something other than recordings. I wish you… I wish you could give me some goddamn advice on how to get the hell out of this… this fucking slump! I feel so fucking pathetic. I… I need help and I don’t know what to do… I just… don’t know what to do anymore…”

Her tears started pouring again, right as her words dried up. She put her forehead against the warm stone and closed her eyes, reminiscing about times long past, imagining her lover’s hands stroking through her hair, just like she used to.

Taglist: @steelandblood @sapphicwhump @urnumber1star @alsolucakairomi @idkwhattodowiththisaltiamsorry

Hope you all liked it! I'm pretty happy with how it turned out, personally. Madeline was a fun character to discover while writing the chapter, and I enjoyed her inner monologue. Let me know what you thought!

Also, yes, in case it wasn't clear, Madeline is a trans woman. We stand for the flag in this household 🏳️‍⚧️

Next chapter is from Andreas/Father's POV. Fun times :)

let me know if you want to be added to the tag list !! see you all next time!

[cebwrites]

Hi, I really liked the Sanji x reader headcanon you wrote where he had to unpack his internalized homophobia about another guy being into him. I was wondering if you would be willing to do something similar for Sanji being in a relationship with someone, and then his partner comes out to him as transmasc? I could see a lot of ways angst could go with that one, like maybe Sanji realizes he's been hurting him unintentionally bc of how he acts w/ guys? If you don't want to though I understand! o/

a/n: hiiii sorry for taking so long on this but i absolutely wanted to the moment i saw it!! i've just been fielding a bit (a lot) of writer's block lately ;w;

reacting to his partner coming out as transmasc (Sanji)

transmasc reader, nonbinary Sanji at the end cw: transphobia, Sanji's internalized homophobia word count: 1.3k

Just a budding pirate at nineteen and horrendously closeted, he doesn't quite realize how his overt repulsion towards men has negatively affected you - he certainly doesn't want to think about it as those thoughts bubble to the surface when you finally sit Sanji down and set the record straight

How you've been learning more about yourself over the course of living with and leaning on your new nakama, seeing different kinds of people and feeling bits of your true self echo and reflect back at you through them, how you feel like even though it's scary, you know this is the best course of action for yourself from here on out

You wanted him to be the first to know, hoping that despite everything maybe he'd be able to put his hang-ups aside to focus on moving forward with you as a couple, addressing those underlying problems later on but together

Sanji doesn't

He's quiet as you explain everything, excitement clear but there is a wariness in your eyes he doesn't miss, he can feel the slight shake in your hands as you hold his

At the end of it, he gives you a pat on the shoulder and a stilted smile, lights another cigarette as he stands to leave with a mention that he needs some space to think for a while - then he's gone

Sanji feels like his world is crumbling, everything he did to be as "straight" as possible dissolving before his eyes, he doesn't notice how much he hurt you in his ignorance or maybe he knows but doesn't want to address it right now

It definitely creates a wedge between the both of you and you agree to separate for the moment, it also puts him at odds with other members of the crew - the awkwardness in the air that crewmates falling out would create in the first place aside

Zoro who never hid himself from day one doesn't pick on Sanji for fun anymore or answer his playful jests, when they spar it sometimes feels like Zoro actually wants to cut him down - he's never been one for being super open anyway but now Zoro doesn't even tolerate casual conversation with him

Robin still smiles at Sanji, she's still relatively the same around him, still thanks him when he flamboyantly swings around to serve delicately handmade afternoon snacks while confessing his undying love to her and Nami both; but something about her feels a hell of a lot colder than before - she's polite but cordial, she doesn't make little comments about his food like before and it's almost like she avoids his presence alone she can help it

Alone, however, after all the other Strawhats have gone to bed and it's just Sanji cleaning up the kitchen and her on night watch, is how she confronts him about all of this

Robin who's been stealth for as long as she can remember, asks Sanji if he'd stop fawning over her if he found out "the truth", she tells him that surely he's noticed her shift in attitude, how Zoro refuses to look at him in the eye let alone talk to him one on one, how it almost seems like she doesn't quite feel safe around him anymore

It's in that moment that Sanji realizes the weight of what he's done and just-- shatters; all his fears, his shame, the ugly internalized feelings he picked up in the process of learning to be a person, his anguish at all the hurt he caused you - Sanji had always loathed the kind of man who would cause his partner harm (and in his head that partner would always be a woman) just like how his father made Sora's life miserable, and now he'd become such a detestable thing, they all spill out onto the kitchen floor along his tears and the undercurrent of regret that flows with it

Robin tells him that she doesn't have to do this, that he's entitled to no one's time given the way he's acted, but a part of her still cares for him because she sees him struggling, hard enough to hurt someone close to him, that if he doesn't address this now he's only going to continue doing that - Sanji's eternally grateful for her patience and grace

He tells her over a cigarette for what it's worth (and he's aware it isn't much) he doesn't think of her any differently, she's just as much a woman now as she was all the days before but Robin doesn't need his approval for that, Sanji then hesitantly goes into the pained relationship he's had with masculinity, his biological father, Zeff, and how that all probably - no, definitely - fed into his sordid reaction, even though there's nothing that can excuse it

Robin is understanding from a small distance as he explains, at one point a hand manifests to soothe Sanji's back when he's in the throes of it, and later on she shifts closer to put her actual hand on his shoulder once his sobs even out

The smoke stings his eyes already raw from tears when Sanji lights another, expressing that even with how he's incredibly in Robin's debt for listening to him in such a low moment, that he regrets not being able to have this conversation with you instead, not that any of this could justify the awful ways he treat you, that he owed an apology to Zoro too, and the rest of the crew for acting this way

So that's exactly what Sanji does, he apologizes by way of his cooking - the next evening he makes everyone's favorites, having to skimp a little on breakfast for emotional reasons, but for dinner he goes all out, a silent apology for causing all this tension in the first place

A few nights later, he comes to you with a tray of your favorite treats, Sanji makes a mental note to thank Usopp and Brook for keeping the boys' quarters empty enough for this to happen, then mentally prepares himself to undergo that emotional turmoil one more time for him to be honest with you provided you even want to let him in; if you don't want to hear it he's more than understanding

But if you do, he explains it all over again, how this was never your fault and only had to do with his aversion to masculinity because of the male figures in his life, how Judge and his older brothers made him feel lower than dirt itself for even expressing positive emotion to the same gender, how even though Zeff raised him with the best intentions, his 'no talk/tough love' policy only served to make Sanji repress himself even more

He's once again a mess by the end of it but he's ready for the emotional outpouring and he's able to stiffen his lip enough to make it through to the end without pausing to just sob for a minute, literally on his knees with the sincerest (if not a tad dramatic) heartfelt apologies to give him another chance

You feel for him, you really do - like Robin, you see someone who's in a lot of pain and at odds with his own identity lashing out at the people around him, people whom he loves and reviles the idea of putting in harm's way

And that's precisely why even though you accept his apology, you tell Sanji you can't be with him the way he is right now, holding his callous hand with a pained, rueful smile of your own

Post time-skip Sanji is a lot more assured in themself, he's addressed all his hang-ups and sorted through their trauma and comes out a lot better for it, when you look at Sanji now you see a person with a solid grasp on themself, someone you're enthusiastic about rebuilding a friendship with now that you're both living as you are

And if it turns into something more, old sparks from both your ends get reignited, stifled loves finally allowed to bloom, you aren't bothered by the thought of that at all

[hopefulatrocity]

From The Ashes-Chapter 7

Note:  Note: First off, thank you for your likes and comments. This is a lot later post than I intended it to be. I’m working really hard on Chapter 9 and it’s taking me longer than I thought. That chapter is when Pheonyx and Daryl officially start the search for Sophia.  So, they’re alone and there isn’t a lot of show dialogue for me to bounce off of. I had a couple days of writer's block and I’ve been working slowly on it. I keep rearranging how I want their conversation to go and also rewatching the season over and over to make sure I’m characterizing Daryl correctly. I want it to be believable. Long story short, I don’t want to post chapter 8 until I have 9 done, so it might be a bit until I’ve posted it. I think once I get over this hump, since it’s the first one on one scene with Daryl and Pheonyx(with Kismet as his wingman) that I’ll be able to write faster. Hopefully. Also sorry for how short this is. The last chapter and this one was originally one chapter but I want to keep my chapters around the same length(3-4k) and it ended up over 6k. So I split it up. 

Chapter TW/CW: internal homophobia, transphobia, descriptions of past abuse, denial of sexuality?(Not sure how to describe it), self-deprecating thoughts, parental death.

Dividers by: @firefly-graphics and @omiyours

Banner by: @liminal-creations​ 

Next

Masterlist

DARYL'S POV

As Daryl was making his way away from the service, fully intending to head straight into the woods to continue the search for Sophia, Rick caught up to his long strides and cut him off. The cop stood in front of him and Daryl narrowed his eyes at the man. 

“Before you head out, I want to get the group together to make a plan for the search.”, Rick said. 

“Ain’t got time for that, man. Shoulda been out at first light lookin’ for the girl.”, Daryl snapped, annoyed at being held up. 

Rick placed his hands on his hips, one hand hovering on the grip of his Colt Python. “Just listen, please. Hershel’s stepson has offered his help for the search. And I’d like you to partner up with him.” Daryl was about to cut in, but Rick continued,  “He’s an experienced tracker and hunter, and he knows these woods better than any of us do. He says he’s been working with his dog on scent tracking, too. With both of you, and the dog, looking for Sophia, I think we have a better chance of finding her.” 

Daryl shook his head, irritated. He worked better alone. His focus needed to be on finding the girl and he couldn’t do that with someone else following him around. Having the group with him yesterday was bad enough. The woods were his domain, his comfort zone. Some stranger on his coattails, mucking up the trails, and making noise while he was trying to concentrate, wasn’t something he wanted to deal with. Not when a little girl’s life was on the line. 

As if reading his mind, Rick said, “Just talk to him. That’s all I ask. If you don’t want to work with him after that, then fine.” 

Daryl wanted to tell him off, or to just walk away. Before he could, Rick was turning and waving a hand to call over Pheonyx, who had been walking back towards the house from Otis’s tribute. Daryl noticed a slight hesitation and stiffening of the man’s body as he looked between Rick and himself. But it was gone in a blink of an eye. The hound dog followed behind Pheonyx and they both stopped in front of the two men. 

Rick smiled at the younger man. Daryl felt his ears warm as Pheonyx lifted the corners of his mouth in return. The heat spread to his face as the other man’s green eyes met his own. The light shade of green reminded him of the pair of fern plants his momma planted in front of their trailer when he was 7 years old. The old mobile home had been extremely run down. Paint was peeling off the walls and several windows had cracks or were missing from his Pa’s violent outbursts. The small grass patch in front of the trailer was often overgrown and full of weeds. But his momma wanted to fix the place up. Unfortunately they didn’t have a lot of money for paint, or pretty flowers to plant. They didn’t have a lot of money for anything really. Momma worked as a waitress at the local diner but most of the money she made, his Pa stole to use for drugs or alcohol. He remembered the day she brought home those little ferns though. His Pa had been off on a bender for a week, like usual. She carried the tiny plants in with a huge smile on her face. They'd been on clearance at the local hardware store because some of the leaves were dried out but his momma was convinced it just needed a little love and care. That afternoon, Daryl and Merle helped her clean up the yard. Merle borrowed the neighbor’s push mower to mow the small yard and Daryl helped Momma weed the area around the front door. He and Merle dug the small holes on either side of the door for the plants, stopping to throw dirt at each other occasionally. When the ferns were planted, the trio stood, Momma’s arms wrapped around both boys’ shoulders, and looked at the trailer. It was still shitty. The paint was still falling off and there was still cardboard on the windows. But the little plants with dried leaves made it look like home. Over the next couple of years, as his mother’s depression and alcohol problems grew, so did the plants. They grew so big that his Pa forced him to cut part of them down because he kept tripping on the long leaves when he would stumble home at night. Despite that, the plants thrived and every time Daryl saw them, he was reminded of that day with Merle and momma. The look of joy on her face. It was one of the few happy memories he had with her. And it was all destroyed the day the trailer caught fire.

The ferns burned away. Right along with his momma. 

Daryl felt his heart ache at the reminder of his mother. But the green of Pheonyx’s eyes still reminded him of that happy day and he was almost entranced. He barely even registered Rick standing next to him. 

“Pheonyx, this is Daryl Dixon. He’s the tracker I mentioned yesterday. He’s been headin’ up the search for Sophia. Daryl, this is Hershel’s stepson. Both Maggie and Hershel say he is an expert on the property and woods surrounding it. He’s offered his services-”, a loud bark from the mutt sitting at Pheonyx’s side had Rick pausing for a moment. “And his dog, to help find Sophia. I’d appreciate it if you two would work together to head up the search for her.”

The arms he had crossed over his chest tensed. As entranced as he was by the man across from him, he couldn’t work with him. In all honesty, he was slightly scared of the emotions he was feeling. They were unraveling the identity that he had clung to for so long. He hadn’t even spoken to Pheonyx yet and his stomach was already in knots. He had to stay far away from him. Maybe then, the feelings would go away. He wanted to lash out at Rick, at Pheonyx, the emotional turmoil raging in his head. But that wouldn’t do anything besides alienate himself further from this group. It might even put them in jeopardy of being kicked off the farm. And he couldn’t do that to them. 

“Work better alone”, he grunted at the man, not even looking at Rick. 

Pheonyx gave a nod, not taking offense to what he said. “So do I. But I spent last night creating a plan for the search. We can split up tomorrow but I need your help at least for today. I’ve been working with Kismet,” he tilted his head towards the dog at his side, some of his brown hair falling over his forehead. Daryl fought the urge to reach out and brush it back. “, on scent tracking for the last month. I need you to take me to exactly where she and Rick split up. He can follow her trail from there. It hasn’t rained so he shouldn’t have too much trouble.”

The sound of the younger man’s voice was like a soft blanket draping over his sweaty shoulders, it eased the tension in his muscles on contact. The sound wasn’t deep but husky and light. Creeping around his head like smoke from a campfire and easing the ever-present vigilance that Daryl had grown accustomed to. Almost losing his train of thought over the drug-like effect of Pheonyx’s voice, Daryl looked towards the sheriff, wondering why he couldn’t be the one to show the other man where Sophia went missing. As if reading his mind, Pheonyx continued, “Rick needs to stay here for Carl and Lori. And Shane fucked up his ankle at the high school. Or else one of them would take me.”

Pheonyx was right about Rick. Daryl couldn’t, in good conscience, ask the man to leave his son, who had just been at death’s door the day prior. And his stomach clenched at the idea of sending Pheonyx off with Shane. Daryl wasn’t entirely certain about Pheonyx’s gender identity. He could just be a biological male with more feminine features. But he suspected the man was transgender. It was no issue to him, but he had a fair idea that it would be an issue to Deputy Douchebag. Shane wasn’t as openly hateful as Merle was, but he was judgmental and sexist. Merle was a loud hateful person. He screamed and hurled slurs, made threats but he rarely ever reached the point of violence, unless he was high. But Shane, his hate was a simmering cauldron, just on the cusp of boiling. Quiet little bubbles that could easily lead to an exploding pot.   At the Quarry, the man kept camp duties fairly segregated in regards to gender. Women weren’t ever allowed on watch or runs, and were mostly kept to cleaning and cooking duties. Shane made the argument every time that the women weren’t trained and therefore would be liabilities. But he also refused to do gun training for anyone, citing lack of ammo as the reasoning. He didn’t go on long winded rants like Merle did. He chose sly comments and verbal digs as his weapons of choice. Offhand comments about “women’s work” and snorts when Andrea offered help with watches or runs. While Shane had never specifically said anything about LGBT people, Daryl just had a feeling that the man’s views would not be friendly. And with his suspicions regarding Otis’s untimely death, Daryl refused to put Pheonyx in the possible firing lane. Why he cared so much about a man he just met was something he was trying to avoid thinking about. 

Despite his personal preferences of working alone, and avoiding any more contact with Pheonyx to quell the feelings building in his chest, Daryl had to admit that having a scent tracking dog would give them a leg up in finding Sophia. Looking down at the dog, he had to contain a snort. The pup was on his back, body curled around, chewing on his back leg like it was a rawhide. He met Pheonyx’s gaze. 

“That mutt is a tracker? He don’t look like he’s got much goin’ on behind those eyes.” 

Pheonyx’s eyes drew together in confusion and he looked down at Kismet. Daryl noted a blush spreading across his tan cheeks when he realized what the dog was doing. At the sheepish look, he couldn’t contain his snort, and he heard Rick chuckle along beside him. 

The younger man nudged the dog with his boot, causing him to roll over into a regular down position. Daryl heard him mutter something unintelligible. Pheonyx stood firm though, the conviction in his expression settling in Daryl’s chest. 

“Okay, Kismet may not be the brightest crayon in the box, I’ll admit. But when he’s got a job he works hard. Unfortunately, you guys don’t have the luxury of shopping for a certified dog. I stand by him though. We’ve only tracked wildlife so far, but I would bet my life on this ‘mutt’”

Despite the voice in his brain telling him it was a bad idea, Daryl nodded his agreement to work with him and the dog. His heart sped up a bit at the thought of working closely with Pheonyx, but he brushed it off. He’d work with him to find Sophia. Then that was it. He’d back off and these intense feelings would fade. 

He hoped.

Next

Masterlist

Taglist: @yoongibaybee, @edgyboi10000

[melancholicheart]

All This Time- Chapter 8

cw: implied/referenced transphobia, trans male pregnancy (past, mentioned), angst, miscommunication, fluff and happy ending

Simon hears Johnny loud and clear. Nods his head a little and sits back into the couch. He tries to speak, no words coming from his mouth, and he eventually commits himself to silence.

He agrees with Johnny. He doesn’t want to die in the field, lose his life on foreign ground, potentially not even get a slither of his body back to even bury, and he can’t imagine Elizabeth having to cope with that. He doesn’t want her to end up as fucked up as he was.

Before he can comprehend even making a full sentence, his phone vibrates on the chair beside him and Price’s name lights up the screen.

“We can carry on talking later,” Johnny assures, “I know you’re going to want time, Si. Take Price’s call.”

Simon nods and grabs his phone, placing it to his ear and managing a small ‘yeah’ as he answers the call.

“I have answers.” Is all Simon gets. No hello, no ‘how are you?’, just work. “Gaz and I are going to come over, we need to talk in person. I take it you’re with John and the kid?”

Simon mumbles another ‘yes’ before Price can be heard by both men in the living room, “Wheels up in 30. Be with you in about an hour, two tops. Be good to see Soap again, more excited about meetin’ the little ‘un though.”

“She’s great, Price.” Simon mutters and Johnny watches him from the side, a small smile creeping onto his face.

Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Elizabeth peaking around the corner and she jumps back when Johnny spots her. He smiles at her and beckons her over, the little girl racing to Johnny and jumping onto him as she dives for the couch. He catches her under her arms and swings her up onto his lap. Simon places his phone down and sighs. He turns and sees Elizabeth sat on Johnny, playing with his hair and squeezing his face and smiles.

“Price and Gaz know something.” He informs, “They’re on their way over, wanna talk in person. I bet you’ve missed them, Gaz especially I presume. He’s missed you, I can guarantee that.”

Johnny nods and smiles, cuddling Elizabeth close and nuzzling her chin with his nose, making her squeal with laughter as he tickles her, “Papa stop!”

“Never,” Johnny growls, tickling her more and she shrieks out again, “I’m never letting you go!”

“Daddy, help!” She wails and Simon chuckles, snatching his daughter from Johnny and holding her away from him.

“He’s so cruel to you isn’t he darling?” Simon muses, holding Elizabeth like a baby and kissing her forehead lightly, “Such a meanie.”

“A big meanie.” Elizabeth agrees as Johnny pouts.

“Hey!”

For the umpteenth time in Johnny’s life, time seems to both halt and fly by. Before he knows it, there’s a knock at the door and Johnny’s breath stills completely. Five years. Five fucking years since he’s even spoken to his best friend and former Captain, never mind seen them. His stomach sinks as Simon clambers to his feet and answers the door.

Johnny grabs a tight hold of Elizabeth and stands, slowly making his way to the door too where he sees Price and Gaz. Price is carrying a folder, tucked under his arms, and a casual jacket covers his arms. His facial hair is most certainly within ‘old man beard’ territory now with his hair curling a little behind his ears. Certainly longer than Johnny’s ever seen it.

Gaz is timeless. There isn’t a hair out of place on his head, not a single wrinkle or crease extra to be found. His biggest change has nothing to do with aging at all, more like trauma. Blunt force, to be specific. There’s a bump on his forehead, no doubt aging now since it isn’t bruised, but fresh stitches cover a slight cut in it. Likely from the butt of a gun. Johnny’s own head aches as he remembers the many injuries of the like he himself sustained.

“Papa,” Elizabeth mutters, eyeing the men cautiously and nervously tucking her face into his neck, “They the men in the pictures?”

Johnny nods, “Yeah sweetheart, they’re mine and Daddy’s friends. Uncle Gaz and Grandpa Price. He ain’t really your Granda’, it’ll just drive him mad if you call him that.”

“Soap,” Price says, pushing past Simon with Gaz in tow. Gaz claps a hand onto Simons’ bicep before following after the Captain. Johnny feels like he’s about to be chewed out for dangerous decision making or the likes when Price stands before him until he takes note of the man’s eyes. Relief, “It’s bloody good to see you son.”

“You too, sir.”

Price turns to Elizabeth and holds a hand out to her, “I believe you’re Miss Elizabeth, is that right?”

She nods and gently puts her hand into Price’s, him shaking her hand with a warm smile on his face, “A pleasure to meet you, kiddo.”

Elizabeth wiggles out of Johnny’s hold and runs over to Simon, wanting to be held by him instead, and Gaz takes the opportunity to throw himself at Johnny. Johnny holds onto Gaz and feels tears brewing in his eyes.

“You’re a fucking moron, Soap,” Gaz mutters, “You and Simon. God I’ve fuckin’ missed you, brother.”

“I’ve missed you too, Gaz,” Johnny whispers, “Coulda done with you throughout all o’ this.”

Gaz chuckles, “I bet.”

Simon taps Gaz’s shoulder and gestures to the angry looking child in his arms, “She wants you to stop swearing.”

“Oh shit, uh, I mean, yeah, sure kiddo! Bad first impression of your Uncle Gaz, ai?” Gaz rubs the back of his neck and smiles sheepishly. Elizabeth giggles at him and nods.

“Papa swears all the time!” Elizabeth chuckles.

“No I do not!” Johnny yelps.

Price chortles, “Nothing’s changed there then has it MacTavish?”

“No Sir.” He sighs.

Before long, they’re all well acquainted once more and Elizabeth takes her time playing with each of them and gauging how she feels about them all. She has taken a liking to Gaz, mainly because he does silly voices when she plays with him, but she keeps gravitating towards Price and climbing into his lap when she gets tired.

Eventually, she only wants the embrace of her Papa and climbs up into his arms. She seems tired, presumably from all the running around and playing she’s been doing, and she starts to nod off whilst tucked in between Johnny and Simon on the couch.

Simon, always believing in ‘no time like the present’, turns his attention to Price and clears his throat, “Are you going to tell us what you found or just sit and make small talk all day?”

Price chuckles at the Lieutenants tone but his smile quickly falls, “Yeah it’s- well, it ain’t pleasant stuff.” He turns and looks at Elizabeth who is pulling on Johnny’s shirt and dancing one of her dinosaurs on his stomach as her eyes flutter slowly. “Perhaps she’d be better in bed?”

Johnny nods and goes to move with Lizzie but she just whines and clutches onto Johnny tighter, “Baby, don’t you want to go to sleep? I will tuck you and Ricky in.” Ricky is her dinosaur pal.

She shakes her head, “A wanna cuddle.”

“We’re going to be having a rubbish grown up conversation,” He tries to reason, “Are you sure?”

She nods fervently, “I go sleepy here, Papa.”

“Alright, love, come here.” He holds her more comfortably and strokes her hair softly as she goes back to drifting off. He gestures towards Price and allows him to proceed.

“I’ll cut to the chase then,” Price clears his throat and stretches back into the chair, “Gaz and I did some digging, got in touch with Laswell too. All the calls are recorded and such and, well, the ones from you were locked away. When we listened, it was General Sutton that shut you down. I think he heard about your ‘situation’, John, because the last thing we picked up on was you saying you were expecting before the line went dead.”

Johnny shrinks into himself, “I- I already thought they hung up on me. That was the day I found out, I was sat on the bathroom floor crying and begging for them to let me speak to you or Simon.”

Price nods, “We know, son. Turns out, Sutton had plans for Ghost. Sent Simon out near enough the following day. Every call of yours, every letter, it’s been blocked or returned. Sutton wouldn’t let this slip up. He had heard what you said and knew that if Simon caught wind of it, he would’ve left and he didn’t want that.”

“That prick,” Simon grumbles, “Damn near killed me on those jobs and kept me away from this? From everything!”

“Sutton didn’t want to admit it, but Gaz and I- well- let’s just say we ‘forcefully’ took him, and we questioned him about it. He spilled his own secrets pretty quickly. Told us how he hated MacTavish, couldn’t believe the 141 took him in, hated the image we were giving the military by having John yet he recognised that you’re a bloody good soldier, Soap. He said that with you gone, we couldn’t afford to lose Ghost too and so, he elaborated this whole coverup so Simon would never find out about Elizabeth. Made you think that Simon forgot about you and Simon- he made you think John moved on.” Price finishes.

Simon looks at Gaz who is staring at his lap. He has anger seething from him and Simon recognises that they’re all hurt by this.

He turns to Elizabeth, tucked into Johnny’s side snoozing away, and sees his daughter. He’s not exaggerating when he says he could’ve died. There were a few close calls, a couple near misses and some poor timing over the last few years that nearly stripped his baby girl from ever meeting him.

Just like Johnny said, regardless of what he thinks of himself, his daughter looks at him like he’s made of gold and the thought of dying in the dirt without ever seeing her beautiful face or without ever making her smile the way she does around him almost kills him there and then.

He clenches his fist and mulls over Price’s words. It doesn’t fully sink in before Johnny speaks.

“Y’know when I was a kid and I first came out, I thought about the other kid’s reactions. How I was gonna be treated by them was all that mattered. I didn’t think I’d still be dealing with how people treat me just because I am who I am.” Johnny mumbles, curled up on the couch. Elizabeth is flat out and panned across Johnny whilst Simon is tightly pressed on the other side of her, practically cuddling Johnny.

He reaches behind the couch and grabs a hold of the scruff of Johnny’s neck. He pulls him towards him and Johnny gets the message and rests his head on Simon’s shoulder with a soft sigh.

Gaz clears his throat and speaks up. His tone indicative of his fighting tongue; “Sutton has been discharged. Dishonourably.”

“Good fuckin’ riddance if you ask me.” Price mutters. He clambers to his feet and gestures to the sliding door that leads to the barely-there balcony of the flat. Smoke break. Johnny nods as he strides over to the door.

“Swear,” Elizabeth mutters, “No swearing.”

Johnny and Simon look down and Johnny pouts, “Oh sweetheart, you don’t look comfortable at all. C’mon, let’s get you comfy.”

He stands up and sits her on his hip, her head pressed to his neck as he carries her through to his room.

Gaz turns to Simon, “He’s a natural Dad, huh?”

Simon nods, “He’s fuckin’ perfect, Garrick. Could do it all on his own if he had to.”

“But you don’t want him to?” Gaz asks.

Simon shakes his head, “God no.”

Johnny sits on the floor beside Elizabeth’s bed, knelt on his knees as he ricks her in and makes Ricky the Dinosaur kiss her nose. She giggles sleepily and grabs ahold of Ricky.

“Love you, Papa.” She mumbles, snuggling her toy.

Johnny leans over and kisses her forehead, brushing her crazy hair back as he smiles, “I love you more, darling girl.”

He sits for a while, just watching her as she sleeps. He strokes her hair repeatedly and sighs softly, a warm smile on his face.

The door clicks behind him and his shoulders tense.

“Is she asleep?” Simon’s voice breaks the silence.

Johnny nods. He hardly trusts his voice right now. Simon sits beside him and a hand snakes around his waist, “Johnny? Talk to me.”

Johnny turns to Simon, makes momentary eye contact, and tears immediately trickle down his face. Simon falters but quickly bundles Johnny into his arms and holds him tightly.

“I’m sorry Simon, I’m so so sorry.” Johnny hiccups, “If I’d have just- I don’t know. You would’ve known her, you would’ve been here from the beginning if I’d have just been- if I hadn’t-”

“Johnny don’t you dare say that,” Simon shoves him aside a little and grabs his face, staring into his eyes, “Don’t you think for one second that this would’ve all been fine if you hadn’t of been yourself. We would’ve never met, Elizabeth wouldn’t even bloody exist and you- Johnny you wouldn’t have been you. Shit happens, especially to us, but we’re here now and we have a beautiful daughter to look after. Let’s leave the past where it bloody belongs.”

Johnny nods a little, not breaking eye contact, and the tears just coat his lashes whilst his eyes remain shiny with unshed pain. Simon pulls him in close again and feels Johnny hug back. A slight chuckle sounds from Johnny, “Never thought I’d hear the day you, of all people, would say to leave the past in the past.”

Simon laughs a little too and rests his head on Johnny’s, “Yeah well I’m a little sick of living in the past. I want to live in the present, right now, where I have you and I have Elizabeth. I have the two things I’ve always needed but didn’t know what I was missing out on until I had it. Until I had you both.”

“We need you, Simon Riley,” Johnny sighs, watching his daughter as she breathes peacefully through her sleep. Simon does the same. “We need you so much more than you’ll ever know.”

[dani-fox]

Tiny H0ly-Tea ramble

This is a rant/ramble post about a user named H0ly-tea's stupid post so if you dont want to read it you can go ahead and ignore this. Its fine if you do want see it.

if you do, click the keep reading bit but CW: slight mentions of transphobia.

Im sure im not the only TF2 tumbler user whos seen the post about 'i hate when ppl make the mers trans because its the 60-70s'

It would take you two seconds plus google to see that Transgender/transsexuality has existed for fucking years.

Transgender people existed years and years before the period where tf2 exists. Years that show many people who were transgender way before the term was made. The best example i can give is a transgender woman by the name of Mary Jones who was a transgender (male to female) African American sex worker who lived in the 1870s and the first recorded transgender reassignment surgery was in 1906 on a man named Karl.M Baer who was intersex but was dubbed female at birth at the age of 21 he came out as a male and underwent surgery at the age of 23. The term transsexual was created in 1907.

I got all that and even more from the first source. The first source is a Wikipedia article a free online source anyone can see. Here is the link to the article if anyone would like to see it: Timeline of transgender history - Wikipedia

This is also Team Fortress 2 were talking about here. This whole game takes place in a world where Australians are buff super-intelligent beings. -New Zealand is an underwater society. -The first group of mercenaries for the Gravel Wars consisted of both real historical figures like Abraham Licon as Pyro and American folk tales like John Henry as the Heavy -A martial called Australiem exists that makes people super humans. -Yetis,spycrabs,Pyro sharks, the weird tube snakes, pootis birds, and more weird animals exist in tf2 -An older than time itself Wizard exists and has beef with an American who can survive blasting his feet with a rocket. -Krampus and Santa exist. -Medic basically invented Mpreg, surgically removed souls, and can fucking do all these crazy medical experiments!

-Heavy Weapons guy can fist-fight bears twice his size.

-Scout can double jump and survive drinking liquified radiation.

-Pyro exists and he is probably not a human being.

-Demoman's eye socket is haunted.

-Aliens exist.

-SAXTON HALE EXISTS

-AND DON'T GET ME STARTED ON WILLIAM CHADSPEAR WHO INVENTED ROCKET JUMPING AND HOW SATION HALE BOUGHT THE ENTIERTY OF ENGLAND.

But apparently trans people is to unrealistic and 'Makes your unconvertible' according to the original user Like at this point just Amit you're transphobic and don't make shitty posts like this becuse your just going to get proven wrong with stupid saying like "trans people did not exist in the 60-70s"!

If you stayed this long for this ramble, thank you for reading over my big barf of words. I don't normally make these types of posts, i try to stay close to my art content. Also sorry for the shitty grammar or spelling. The American education system failed me lol

[fishsfailureson]

Finally freeing this post from my drafts gh

So lately I've been thinking about gender in a fantasy project I've been working on for a very long time. Said project is The Journey, a xenofiction about foxes who were brought to another realm by a god, had their genes modified, were given sapience, and also have magic. I don't want to go into detail about that right now since it's still in development and also contains spoilers so that's all you need to know about that. (The following work is still in development, and is subject to change, I would not consider it as spoiler heavy although it does play some role in the plot)

(Slight cw for discussions of in-universe transphobia, while the societies of this book series are generally accepting they are definitely not perfect (also fictional religion))

(Also please note that this doesn't reflect my actual beliefs around being trans. I hope this is already obvious but still.)

Authorial Intent

One thing I really want to convey in this series is that the societies that the characters live in is neither utopian nor dystopian. It is intended to suck but not suck completely (there's a whole freaking war going on of course things suck!!!). This does include bigotry. I want to convey the idea of things sucking, but still being able to get better. One thing I don't want to do is have the way bigotry manifests in-universe be identical to any real world manifestation of prejudice- because that'd feel a little unrealistic in my opinion.

Names

In the setting of The Journey, names are incredibly culturally significant. Most individuals have a necklace with a representation of their name's meaning on it, these are normally made of metal, the type depending on location and status, some places also use other materials such as bone, jade or wood. Some areas wear their necklaces constantly while others wear them only on special occasions. I could go on a whole ramble about this but this post is about trans characters so we'll save that for another day.

So, what happens when a fox decides to change their name? They have a ceremony for that! (They also probably have an initial naming ceremony but I haven't really thought about it much) The exact details of the ceremony are undecided currently. This is somewhat similar to a legal name change except it is a lot more spiritual. It is HIGHLY taboo to use someone's old name for them if they have gone through this ceremony. On the other hand it is quite common for individuals to justify deadnaming individuals who haven't gone through the ceremony yet because they haven't which sucks really. (Note: honestly in universe I do not feel like the term "deadname" would fit to describe an individual's relationship with their old name- I'm considering the term "shedded name" instead.)

"Now, what do they do with their old necklaces?" you may ask. Well you're in luck because I do in fact have an answer for this question! Name necklaces are created from rare materials (usually) and have a lot of fine craftmanship put into them- there are individuals who specialise in designing and creating them after all. Getting rid of them would be incredibly impractical and it's not like you could just sell a sacred object without being given the side-eye by everyone around you. So instead of throwing them away, most individuals keep their old name necklaces until they find someone to gift them to- often a newborn relative, or a relative who transitioned and is looking for a new name (note: this happens to one of The Journey's protagonists actually- her chosen name, Eclipse, used to belong to her great-grandfather, Ginkgo). Naming and renaming ceremonies are actually slightly different depending on whether the name is being gifted or not.

The gods (and magic)

While not all gods in-universe are non-binary, the gods specific to the pantheon that the foxes worship all are. This is because they (the gods) didn't have any exposure to the concept of gender during their early years- when they first encountered the concept of gender they had a collective gender identity crisis but they all came to the conclusion that gender didn't really matter to them.

There is a small school of thought that being non-binary is a form of blasphemy but this is a fringe belief. The gods themselves have come down to say it is bullshit. Alas, it still persists.

Medical transition is possible through the use of magic. The process is swift and painless- although it does feel a little bit weird. It can be done as many times as an individual wants in theory, however said magic is only held by two individuals, who are both gods. One has been banished from the pantheon and is completely unavailable and the other is often busy, so it is pretty difficult to access. Still probably better than what we have irl though. Due to how difficult it is to obtain, not medically transitioning isn't particularly frowned upon, although most individuals assume that everyone wants it.

Conclusion (kinda)

While the society of The Journey is generally accepting of trans individuals it is still incredibly flawed. It has certainly been significantly better than real life- transness has never been outlawed after all, but there is still room for improvement. Same goes for literally any other issue in their society. Anyway I have no idea what else to write here so I'm just ending this now lmao. Also this is still a work in progress so things may change.

[alien-100]

CW: Slight transphobia

Painful memories

[kiaradaughterofselene]

Open starter (basically redoing an old one)

(Slight cw for mentions of transphobia and being misgendered in the past)

Kiara sat quietly in the Aphrodite cabin, letting some of the campers give her a much needed makeover. She had just been brought back to camp after being captured on her quest (long story), and she was in rough condition, both mentally and physically. She figured she deserved a bit of a spa day. An opportunity to relax while someone did her braids, and finally be safe. An opportunity to feel pretty for the first time in a long time. Her captors kept insisting she was a boy. Treating her like one, referring to her as one, et cetera. She was not a boy.

She was much thinner than when you had left her. She looked like a completely different person. She was more scared than she use to be. A few new scars decorated her skin.

(This is gonna be the finished look btw)

@the-gods-abandoned-us @arisdaughter @mache-of-greece @demigod-jack-hearth @kaiaalwayswins @unhinged-waterlilly @yourlocalfallenstar @son-of-the-moonlight @luci-likes-dinoss @elixs-mythology-corner @bast-the-best26 @emdabitchass @if-chaos-was-a-boy @luck-is-crucial @love-lightning-forethought @the-prince-telemachus @pink-koi-lovejoy @apollos-favorite-child @ariathemortal @cass-sees-the-future @reyna4ever @daughter-ofthe-moontitan @of-course-im-the-winner